Jason DeWeen and Austin Show dissect FaZe Clan's entertainment division retirement, citing pay misalignments as the split cause. They contrast this with Jason's Maybach purchase and upcoming private island stream to fund colorectal cancer awareness. The duo debates gym culture stereotypes, recounting traumatic Diamond Gym experiences and childhood obesity struggles. They analyze 19th-century con man George C. Parker's Brooklyn Bridge scams against modern crypto frauds, comparing Austin's teenage NFT schemes to historical deception. Ultimately, the episode blends personal anecdotes with historical crime analysis while mocking New Year's resolutions and ending with a post-credits photo mix-up. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Heated Rivalry and Performative Acts00:15:06
Can you give us any juicy tidbits or we can end the conversation?
But if there's anything that you just want to say, we want to set straight.
What's one thing FaZe didn't get to do?
Say somebody had like.
Do you think they're going to try and sign new people to replace y'all?
Ladies and gentlemen, happy new year and welcome to another year of the Fear and Podcast.
Let's go.
Episode of the year.
Aside from Piker, Will Nath Austin Show, and our special guest, Jason the Ween.
I'm back, man.
Happy to have you.
Yeah, it's good to have you back.
First episode of the year.
You didn't even know it was the first episode of the year until you got here.
That's right.
No, we had a lot of fun.
It's an honor episode.
I mean, he didn't even know it's the new year.
He didn't even know.
No.
He's just been.
He's not locked in.
I've been losing track of time.
Yeah, no, it's been on break.
Yeah, it's that weird part of the year.
You know what I mean?
But between Christmas and New Year's, you don't know what day it is.
I can't.
Look, look, this is going to be very like, oh, I'm an influencer, so I don't have a real job of me.
But I kind of hate this holiday period.
Really?
I really do because every like time is at a standstill.
There's no good content coming out.
Like, what do you mean?
All of my news shows.
The president of Venezuela just got kidnapped.
Yeah, okay.
No, but that's news.
That's news.
That's different.
Like, I just content.
I meant like TV shows.
It's not content.
It's a finale of Pluribus.
Yeah, I watched it.
Series finale of what's it?
Heated rivalry.
Heated your thing.
Heated rivalry.
You seen heated rivalry?
No, I don't know.
The end of the football season.
Nope.
You do know what that is.
Heated rivalry.
You don't know what it is.
You don't fuck with gay shit, bro.
Remember.
You fuck with gay shit.
No, no, no, no.
You're not gay, but like you fuck with gay.
You fuck with gay shit.
Like a straight way.
You fuck with gay shit.
It is a straight way.
Yeah.
The idea of dapping up gay shit.
Yeah, no, I had a heated rivalry moment and not like in a gay way.
I was sitting on the keyboard.
I was like, when we start talking about heated rivalry in the family, who's weak?
And it's just my mom, my dad, my brother.
And my mom has no idea what it is.
And my dad starts explaining what it is.
And I was like, Turkish?
Yeah.
What's that sound like?
Just so I can be a flyer.
Go ahead.
Homosexual.
It's a joke I don't know about.
No, no, no.
We'll explain heated rivalry in a second.
So then I was like, all right, let's watch it.
So I turn it on, like probably three frames in, my dad goes, okay, enough.
Okay, this is the thing.
He didn't even do anything gay yet.
Well, let's bring it.
Heated Rivalry is a.
It's a.
It's an.
It's a homo erotic hockey movie where two players from opposite uh countries, a Canadian team and a Russian team um they they're, they're like rivals.
But then they have this love affair.
And it's a gay love affair yeah, and they're.
And the movie is.
Is you know because?
So many sports yes, are gay?
Hockey though, famously not gay yes, but kind of a famously straight sport, it's one we wish was gay right well, and it turns out it.
It was a banger, because everyone can't stop talking about it, especially my audience.
They're always like, Have you watched Heated Rival yet?
Or are you still homophobic?
And I'm like, I'm homophobic.
Please.
I haven't watched it yet.
So this, Jason, this is taking the internet by storm.
And clearly, you're not on that side of the internet.
No.
Because I thought the whole world was.
Yeah, he's not tapped in on the gunk side of the internet.
Gay unk.
This is gay unknown stuff?
Yes, 100%.
Can I be honest?
Yeah.
This is my heated rivalry hot take.
I may get some flack for this.
But the Russian accent's a turnoff.
Wow.
Really?
I just racist.
Isn't the Russian the top, though?
Yeah.
Oh.
You'd never.
Oh, that's that's Jason.
I'm sorry.
We're corrupting this.
No, and also, also, you know what it is?
It's because he's so patriotic.
Oh.
That's what it is.
He's like, oh, I would never crack USSR Chiefs.
I'll be honest.
Have you ever fucked a Russian bottom?
There's a lot of gay things going on right now.
He's not like, he's not a fucking Quaker.
He knows this shit.
I know.
Have you fucked a Russian bottom?
No, not yet.
Wow.
A Ukrainian one, though.
Okay.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
Okay.
Wait, that's the side of the story.
Is it the Ukrainian bottom that I know?
No, no, no, not that one.
Oh, because I slapped his ass.
Yeah, you did.
I did.
Sorry, Jason.
I smacked his ass.
What exactly is going on?
Is this how y'all start y'all?
We went to the gay pride parade like two years ago, I think.
And he was standing in front of there was a Ukrainian guy who's like a content creator.
He's like an influencer.
He's a gay influencer.
And he was asking questions.
And he thought I'd get uncomfortable with like gay stuff.
And I was just not uncomfortable with it at all.
And then I just smacked the shit out of his ass.
Yeah.
Oh, you really drive the point on me.
Yeah.
Nice.
So anyway, this show that...
What the fuck were you doing watching it with your father?
I didn't realize it's going to be like that gay, you know?
And then I saw snippets of it.
I saw snippets of it.
There's like dudes blowing each other.
Yeah.
That's the whole show.
But that's awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah, but it'd be pretty funny to see that.
Like, see my dad's reaction to it.
She's like, you gotta, you gotta go see it.
You're watching that.
I'm watching with you.
Hold on.
I'll watch it with my dad.
Your dad is like, he's fresh off the boat, right?
Nah, he's pretty.
Like, if I was gay, he'd disown me type of thing.
Yeah, so he's like, he's, he's, he's first gen, right?
Like, he, he immigrated to America or was he second gen?
Good thing you're not gay.
Damn.
So, so my dad is, is in a similar boat where, like, he didn't even get his American citizenship on purpose until like, you know, the, the second Trump administration was coming around.
And he was like, okay, I won't be able to travel to this country if I don't get this fucking thing done.
But like, he refuses to speak English, even though he got, he got his dissertation.
He got his PhD from London School of Speaker.
Homo sex you off.
Yeah.
So like he's that, he's that type of guy.
He's like pretty open-minded.
It's very open-minded for like a 65-year-old Turkish man.
But like he thinks that me painting my nails was the gayest thing that I've like ever done.
And he actually had this like heart to heart with me where he called me up one day and he's like, son, you know, like you can tell me, right?
Like if there's, do you have a similar thing with your dad?
Is what I mean?
No, I came home with blonde hair and earrings though.
And he was like, we need to talk.
Oh, oh, shit.
Did he mean you were gay?
Yeah.
No, wait, no, he didn't think I was gay, but he was like, you know, you're doing a lot of gay things.
Is everything okay?
I'm like, no, I'm not gay.
I just, I just came to LA.
What is So interesting transition.
You just did Diamond Gym, right?
Is the name of it?
I did.
Yeah, Diamond Gym, New Jersey.
I just flew back.
My whole body is sore.
My joints hurt.
So I have a take.
I'm all for a lot of, I like to bro down.
I like to go to the gym.
I like a lot of grab ass.
I like a lot of, you know, locker room talk.
Yeah, locker room.
Locker room talk.
I think Diamond Gym's a little gay.
Oh my God.
What is gayer than being dominated by other men?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Listen, can you explain what Diamond Jim is?
Okay, yeah, for those of you who don't understand, Diamond Gym is a gym that's famously the most dangerous gym where they basically work you out to the point where you can no longer work out and they bully you to get you to work out more, which to me, a little gay.
I don't think that's, I think Will is just saying like they have the before and after pictures of you like a casting couch.
Like you go in, big smile, you come out like rich.
I think it's just sweaty, the loads on the face.
Will I don't know if we did all that, but we were just like, I think it's just men's, men, strong men.
That does sound kind of gay.
I'm going to make two points.
Number one, working out is the gayest activity that you can do.
That's number one.
And if anyone actually contests that, they're wrong.
We don't have like a gay guy to ask this question to in this in the group right now.
So, but like, I think I never, Jay, you have to understand I'm not gay enough for them.
Yeah.
So you're like a straight gay.
That's it.
Yes.
You're gay.
The more you work out, the gayer you become 100%.
Sure.
You know how people say like, oh, they're turning the children gay by watching television.
No, it's at the gym.
If you have a gym, you own a gym, you are actually turning everybody gay, no matter what age range they're in.
Because the more you work out, the gayer you become, especially after a certain point, you're working out specifically to make other men look at you and think you're attractive.
And we agree with this.
Do you agree with that part?
Yeah, I think straight men are objectively more gay than gay men.
Yeah.
So that's number one.
Also, like all the evidence, like women over and over and over again are like, there's a threshold.
Please don't get more jacked.
I'm going to do it.
Like Knut is not a bodybuilder.
And maybe Gabe can point to him over here somewhere.
But like Knut is very appealing in his physique for someone like myself or someone who understands the amount of work that is necessary to put to make your body look like that.
Canute is not like going to be immediately appealing to every single woman.
There's like a universal attractiveness.
And once you go beyond it, you're kind of like an object of fascination.
So, right?
Yes.
He's he is, this is the concept known as miring.
We mire Knut because we admire his physique.
His physique is not like universally appealing for all women.
Again, gay.
That's my point.
Okay, so what was your experience like then?
Treacherous.
Treacherous.
Yeah.
What do they do to you?
Listen.
I put such a weird focus on this concept.
Yeah, it's a lot.
I feel like the first 20 minutes about the podcast has been a lot of gay things, which is okay.
We move some of that.
No, no, no.
I support it.
No, I support it too.
We're going to do another two hours.
I went in and they made me do like for the warm-up, like 200 tricep extensions.
Damn.
And then after every set, it's 35 push-ups.
And if you put your knee on the ground, it's 20 more push-ups.
Damn.
Yeah.
They just beat the shit out of you.
To be honest, I'm so into that.
I feel like that'd be so much fun.
That's how it works.
It was so funny.
I was going to work out every day.
That's how it works out normally, which is why I'm shocked.
I was doing quarter reps at the end.
Yeah, you'd be honest.
Did they yell at you?
Yeah, they did yell at me.
I have one kid like punched me because I put the bar down.
Punched you.
I'm going to be honest.
They need to open that gym in West Hollywood.
Yeah.
That.
I'm telling you.
This is so right on.
Jason, I'm telling you.
I'm not saying you're gay.
I'm not saying anybody that does that is gay.
I feel bad because that gym needs to just and we'll rename it.
I feel bad.
Just rename it to.
And people will just beat the shit.
No, no, no.
I feel bad because I feel like Diamond Jim is going to watch this and be upset.
But I think it's awesome.
I just think it's, you know.
Oh, they're going to be pissed at me for this?
No, I feel like they probably don't want to be known as the gay gym gym.
But I admire what they're doing.
It's cool.
Yeah, no.
Patty and I forgot to mention that.
That's how Will works out.
Sorry to cut you off.
But that is literally.
I try and I threw up 350 plus for the first time on squat since I ripped my knee apart recently and it felt so good.
I was benching 250 today like it was a fucking toothpick.
I feel real staunch.
FaZe Clan.
Let's talk about it.
You were phasing up, new generation.
Yep.
Blew up.
Had a great time.
And then all of a sudden, in the midst of Phase Xmas in Big Bear.
Big Bear is where everything goes to shit.
On Christmas Day.
Big Bear out of nowhere.
On Christmas Day, man.
The FaZe streams stop.
Except for Silkies.
Which was surprising.
Everyone was wondering what the fuck was going on there.
But in any case, you guys come back.
There's suspicion.
There's things going on.
People are going crazy.
I was seeing, I was monitoring the comms.
Let me tell you, those boys were going crazy.
They were like, where the fuck is Jason?
I'm losing my mind.
People were getting parasocial.
Drip feeding information.
All of a sudden, you guys say you're done with FaZe.
One after another.
One hour in between each other's announcements.
A little dramatic.
Like a little fucking K-pop band.
Did you guys plan it that way?
Yeah.
Actually.
Cool.
Talk to us about what happened.
Go.
No, there is a lot of things I can't speak about.
And we will not force you to do that.
Some things I don't even know.
I don't know what I can and can't.
Okay.
To be honest.
But I could say.
We'll send you a cut afterward.
And we can't.
Never mind.
Just be careful, motherfucker.
Keep that part in.
This is wrong.
Hey, listen.
All right.
FaZe was a great part of my career.
Right.
Great, great, great statement.
Helped me meet a lot of cool people, including my closest friends, like everybody that lives at the current house right now.
And yeah, it's a great part of my career, but you know, things just didn't work out.
Understood.
I know y'all want the juicy part, but I feel like I can't really talk.
No, no, no, no.
I'll say this.
Could you guys wait?
Like, was it, were you like, maybe we should wait till after Christmas or at any moment?
Because he was very disappointed.
He was watching.
He told me.
Honestly, no, because I was kind of like, damn.
On Christmas Day, you were watching Facemas?
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
I was like, damn.
He's fucking lying to you.
He was not watching Facebook.
He's a lying piece of shit.
No, I'm not lying.
He don't know.
Okay.
Okay, what happened the first day?
Are you fucking kidding me?
Let me tell you what happened the first day.
Well, it all started with all y'all on camera.
Okay.
And you put up a Christmas tree.
No.
Well, I missed the fucking first day.
All right, Jason.
Shut the fuck up.
Shut the fuck up, Azana.
I was busy during a hot.
You have to understand I was in China.
I was in China.
No, you were just lied to me.
No, I didn't.
So you were being performative.
Yeah, but you were too.
I was.
Messed Up Moments That Stick00:07:05
You were between now.
We're even now.
We're even.
Okay, you have to understand.
I can't see the screen.
I can eat glasses.
Yeah, yeah.
It's difficult.
I'm going to talk about the next steps.
Because you guys obviously have a very good team.
You have a very good group.
And what I talked about in the process while this was happening when a lot of people were confused.
My suspicion was that there's probably like a contract issue, but that the streamers themselves, the talent, is at the end of the day, what makes the organization.
And the organization does not make the talent.
And I feel like in this industry, some people understand that.
Some people don't understand that.
And since you already have a good group of people, as far as the next steps goes, because I know Ron's been talking to some people on camera about this stuff, one of the things I found out was that the side men actually have a cooperative arrangement where they do equal say equal pay.
And for those of you who don't know, everyone here on this podcast knows, obviously, but FearN has a similar structure.
We have the same structure.
I've been negotiating for a higher rate for a while.
You will never get it because it's equal.
Everything's cut equally.
I've been trying to take his percentage.
Yeah.
And I think that that's really good for longevity in general.
It doesn't cause like a bunch of arguments.
No.
It's really good for.
I've been trying to.
I've been stealing his money for.
Have y'all had like bad arguments?
No, it's never about money.
No, no.
Because we all own an equal piece of this.
Yeah.
Well, there are moments where like I sold mine to a to be fair.
Like you will, like, I don't know who's the scammer in your group because there's got to be one scammer.
Like there's going to be someone who is goes to China and negotiates the nicest room for themselves and charges it to the rest of the group.
Yeah.
You know, stuff like that.
Like stuff like that.
Just hypothetical.
In my defense, I made all the content.
I know, I was just saying, we weren't even, we weren't given a hypothetical.
Why are you being demonstrated?
I made content for that.
I was doing that.
It's weird that he's owning it.
They even pointed out.
They didn't point figures.
Jason, it was a nice room.
It was barely nicer than ours, but we ended up paying thousands of extra dollars.
So who's the scammer?
I don't think there's a scammer in a group.
I think there's older people in the group, like Adapt and Silky.
If we were to get a bigger house, they would obviously want the bigger rooms.
Otherwise, they wouldn't stay.
Which makes sense, though.
Like they want their own guys there.
Join back up.
Get the band back together.
I think as for right now, we'll just do content together, but like creating another group.
No idea.
Do you guys do you enjoy living with other people or would you prefer to live on your own?
This is a bad time to ask him that question.
I like living with other people because he's newly in a relationship.
No, but that's but that's different.
No, but hold on.
They're not at a stage in a relationship where y'all are moving in together anyway.
So that's like Sakura.
If you're listening right now, I bless it.
Now she won't bother you.
I just gave him the game.
I like living with people, though.
I've never lived alone, to be honest.
Okay, you like living with people?
Okay.
I don't.
I hate it.
What is that?
Spicy bullshit.
I told you.
Those are peppercorns, so it has like a molly.
It kind of numbs your.
Would you ever make like an AZ?
Like a reverse phase?
A new org?
As of right now, I have no idea.
All right, talk some shit.
Who's the most likely to fall off now that you guys broke up?
Who's cooked?
Whoa.
No one.
No one.
What?
All my boys will do fine on their own.
What about you?
Who do you think?
If we broke up?
Yeah.
That's ridiculous.
I don't like that.
You liked it and then you didn't.
I like the P does.
What the fuck?
What is that?
Accidentally had the peppercorns, I think.
That's why.
Okay.
Can you give us any juicy tidbits?
We can end the conversation, but if there's anything that you just want to say, 82 straight.
We want to set straight.
What's one thing FaZe didn't get to do?
Say somebody had like just some petty drama that won't get you sued.
Do you think they're going to try and sign new people to replace y'all?
No, I think they're retiring the entertainment side of things and they're just focusing on esports.
Nice.
Wow.
We don't have to, you don't have to say anything.
Let me see.
But think it was good.
I like notes.
Oh, you had notes.
Oh, you were.
You thought you were going to get grilled on this, didn't you?
No, just like for that first stream back.
Okay, okay.
I definitely deleted the notes.
Okay.
All right, Jason.
You don't have to do it.
But I'll say that, you know, on the group side of things with FaZe, all the guys, everything was perfect.
We were super motivated.
We all were aligned on being the best content creators and best streamers.
But sometimes on the business side of things, we just never aligned.
Yeah.
Which caused us to separate.
We'll end it with this.
What's your favorite FaZe memory?
Looking back.
That's a good question.
Sub-author?
Sub-a-thon.
First sub-a-thon was very, very great.
First time I hit 100K, had that whole ETA thing.
That was a great moment.
But I think my favorite moment was literally when we were all just doing like 10-hour streams in that first house, literally fucking around and going in and out and just playing basketball and fucking around.
Literally, we had.
Oh, yeah, when you guys had that ass IRL set up.
Yeah, with the I couldn't believe it.
Mars, remember?
Isn't that funny?
When we went to play basketball with them and they had the fucking phone cameras, I was like, this is ass.
Isn't that funny, though, that like of all the massive moments, all the giant things you guys accomplished, it's just fucking around with your friends that'll stick with you the longest.
Yeah.
That's how I kind of feel about our career too.
It's like it's the quiet, dumb things that we shared that I would miss the most.
I miss when everybody used to go to TwitchCon.
I still got to TwitchCon.
Yeah, I know, but like our back in the day, like we used to go to every, every, everybody was going to every convention.
PAX East, PAX West, PAX South.
Everybody would go to everything.
Back when you were a watcher and not a Twitcher, if you recall, we were all very good friends with one another.
Like actually, all these shooters that everybody can hate each other's guts now.
We all used to collaborate.
Everyone used to collaborate.
Oh, I know it was fun.
Oh, I know.
Everybody had a good time together.
Now it's like, yeah.
And then fucking Gamba ruined that shit.
Yep.
Dropped the grenade in between all that.
Well, Jason, look, I mean, it's you're going to be fine.
I think collab is one of the best things you can do as a content creator.
So it's kind of messed up that happened.
I know.
I think it's fucked up.
I agree.
Well, Jason, thank you for your honesty on the matter.
I've been on my Chud Arc.
Traumatic Days on the Island00:15:32
New York.
What's a Chud?
Chud is just like, it don't work out.
I don't care about it.
I don't know what that is at all.
I can't believe the fucking Zoomers have reappropriated.
Not like.
That's what Chud means now.
Chud is like a...
What the fuck?
Like, let me get a Lacey.
Well, yeah, Lacey would be a Chud, but in a different way, because he's right.
So Chud originally...
No, Chud originally.
Chud was like a right-winger.
Yeah.
So Chud originally comes from...
And it's my boys that actually literally put it in the lexicon initially.
It's from an old 90s famous Will will know the fucking reference.
It's like, sure.
What's the guy with the black hair guy?
And then there's a blonde guy with the long hair.
They're comic book nerds.
Like they run a comic book shop or something.
Comic book nerds, they run away.
What about Jay and Silent Bob?
Yeah, Jay and Silent Bob.
So I think it's originally from Jay and Silent Bob, but my buddies at Chapo Trap House basically started saying right-wingers were Chuds, and then it got into mass lexicon as like a right-winger.
So in my generation, when someone says Chud, we think like a hog or I like to say hog.
Oh, so it kind of's like the same thing.
No, but he's saying schlubby.
Chud is like, you eat whatever the fuck you want.
Nice.
Okay.
I don't care about anything.
Nice.
Jobless, unemployed.
Wow.
Yeah.
Like neat.
What?
Neat.
Oh, yeah.
N-E-E-T.
I don't know that one.
That means.
That's a new one to me.
Yeah.
Chud.
I'm going to start using that.
Neat is an old one, but you can bring it for if you want.
Yeah.
I'm going to start using that.
I'll give you that new one.
Yeah.
You can use it as a new thing now.
Isn't that crazy?
Everything old becomes new again.
Look at that.
Dude, you sound so old.
I know.
You sound so old.
It's crazy because everything old and fucked up.
In my day, we usually got a question.
Except I'm the most tapped in.
Legitimate new shit.
I need to know.
Yeah.
Okay.
We old do you?
Yes, yes.
Yeah.
Dog, I have there's a lot of old conversations that already we already had.
I'm just sitting here in silence.
I don't know.
Because you don't know how to do it.
I don't know how to, I don't know how to give my own image.
What would you do in a, like a, if we were 20, what would we be talking about?
I don't know.
Type shit.
That was the oldest.
You've appeared.
So what?
Wait, who's the youngest here?
Youngest.
Oh, shit.
I'm the youngest.
Medium.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm the oldest.
It was business between y'all too.
Clock me is the young.
You hear that?
You hear that?
He's the youngest.
Yeah.
I don't know.
You look the youngest.
Thank you.
That's it.
I don't want or need to come across as young anymore because I'm rich.
Oh.
See, that's that's that's what the I feel like that's exactly what like 20-year-old podcasts sound like to me when I see it like on clips.
They're like, We don't need to be fucking automars, dude.
I got here by grinding.
Yeah, that's like that's how I feel.
Oh my god.
Do we?
Oh, y'all, y'all got a whole old head jokes.
Yeah.
A lot of old head jokes.
Old head jokes.
Brother, you don't know.
I'm enjoying this.
That's crazy.
You don't understand.
I'm very alive.
You have to own it.
If you get insecure about your age, then they're going to be like, oh, I do.
I'm not insecure.
I can't wait till I'm 35.
I'm not insecure about my age at all.
I love my age.
You are very convinced.
What's your favorite thing about being old?
You know what, Jason?
I'll tell you what is cool about being old.
How old are you?
32.
When you get into.
Yes.
I said, holy fuck.
Hey, yeah.
You know what, Jason?
I tell you what, when you get to be my age.
Oh, God.
You're really digging it.
When you get to be my age.
You wake up in the morning, and the best part of the day is just enjoying a nice cup of coffee.
You know what I do nowadays in the winter?
I just like it's it's the Christmas season, um, you know, the holiday season.
I get, I go and I just go and I drive to my favorite coffee shop.
I know the barista.
He doesn't speak Frank.
I get a cup of coffee and I take the long way.
Bro, bro, he's not, he's not normal.
And I listen to Frank Sinatra and I take a cup of coffee.
I like Frank Sinatra.
You like Frank Sinatra?
Okay, listen.
Listen, Austin has lived.
Austin has lived his life like an 85-year-old retiree since he was like your age.
Okay.
So many, many decades ago, when he was your age, he was still doing that same shit.
Like when he was in, when he was in college, he worked at a retirement home.
Like literally.
I did.
He worked at a retirement home and he was vibing out with the fucking old guys.
He listens to old guy music.
That's right.
And he would just like end college, go to the Applebee's by himself and order a margarita and just sit there.
Not Mario guy.
Not even Oreo milkshake.
An Oreo milkshake.
That's what you were doing at my age?
Yeah, bro.
And 21 years old, all my friends were partying and sitting at Applebee's.
But see, you know, I was kind of a.
I was kind of what your generation calls a loser.
I think every generation called losers in your generation chuds.
Chuds.
I was a chud.
Or loser still.
Loser.
All right.
Put us on game.
What else?
What other?
What's important in your life right now?
It's so hot in here.
Can I open that door?
I just turned the AC on.
Hold on.
Well, I am starting in 2026 in a relationship.
You're in a relationship?
What's that like?
New love.
New love is great.
Just went to New York with Sakura.
Things are great.
Had a good time.
Had like VIP spots to watch the ball drop.
That's fucking badass.
Can I say something?
Having new love at 21 and being rich?
Like, how fucking cool is that, man?
Pretty cool.
Like, you're 21.
I have 21.
Love is in its peak.
You know what I mean?
And like, you're just fucking rich as fuck.
You're like VIP at 21.
It was a pretty cool experience.
At 21.
Anyway, go ahead.
I'm just, I'm admiring.
I admire that.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah, that's right.
You know, I'm very blessed.
I'm very blessed.
Private chauffeur.
Right.
No, Okay, okay, for sure.
You should get on there.
Anyway, you're in a relationship.
You did not listen to a single piece of advice I gave you.
Nope.
At any point.
I was trying to help you out.
You're like, now you were like, yeah, no, this seems like a good idea.
I'm going to do the exact opposite.
What advice did you say?
Wait, I don't remember.
Yeah, what'd you give me?
I was just like, don't reveal that you're in a relationship.
I wasn't trying to.
And then she leaked it.
Yeah.
So I was like, you know what?
Just gotta go public.
I had a guy like that.
I have a guy like that.
And I was like, I don't want to be public with this.
And then he started streaming in my house.
Oh.
Yeah.
You know?
Happiness.
No, I'm kidding.
We're very happy and we're very happy.
You're 33.
32, dude.
Fuck, give me a break.
I'm 32.
I don't lie about my age anymore.
I used to lie about my age.
Might as well be 34 at this point.
You got a nice relationship.
Trip in the world, fantastic.
Yeah.
I've been on break just thinking about what I want to accomplish 2026.
All right.
What do you want to accomplish?
I've been meeting with my team about just streaming ideas.
And I actually was thinking about just things streamers haven't done yet.
All right.
And I'm planning on doing seven day stranded on like an island.
That's fucking badass.
No Epstein.
Okay.
Well, thank you for clarifying.
No Little St. James.
No.
Thank you for clarifying.
It's probably very affordable if you think about it.
Like, because probably no one has returned to the bottom of the house.
Actually, it's pretty expensive.
Oh, you look at it?
I've been looking.
I've been rent out and get off the box.
You're like, no, Epstein, unless the price is right.
It was pretty expensive.
And I don't know, to be honest, but my team said it was expensive.
Okay, okay.
Oh, so you actually.
Okay, that's crazy.
I didn't even know you could rent it out.
Marsh, look it up.
No, I was looking.
Look up how much to rent Epstein.
I've been looking at islands for a couple of years.
Can I make a suggestion for an island?
I have an island.
I know an island.
I know two islands.
Okay.
Okay.
Look up, Marsh.
There is a old defunct military lighthouse in, I think, like Wales.
I remember that is for sale.
Oh, yes.
We looked it up on the stream, no?
Bro.
Or on the I think it'll blow your fucking mind.
And it's only like $100,000.
I'm not going to buy an island.
$100,000.
No, but it is $100,000.
I'm going to buy an island.
It's cheaper to rent.
It's actually pretty cheap for an island.
Thank you.
Oh, you're right.
I guess I have a house and that's what's going to happen.
Oh, Little St. James?
Wait.
Renting an entire part of the island like Little St. James.
Oh.
I've already ran it.
I think there's evidence.
But seven days, seven times seven, seven times 30.
That's 200 lives.
And I'm doing a product.
I have a production where it's so I'm going there.
No cameraman.
It's just straight cameras.
Alone.
Yeah, I'm going alone.
I've survived for seven days.
I've seen Naked and Afraid.
I'm doing it in February.
Wait, you're not even going to jerk off?
That's crazy.
Nah.
Seven days.
I'm afraid I'm going to leak my dick, though.
Because I'm not going to know if I leaked my dick.
Wait, that's crazy because you won't have Twitch chat?
I won't have a Twitch chat.
That's crazy.
You got to have Twitch chat.
I don't think I'm going to have Twitch chat.
That's crazy.
So for the whole week, you're going to get back and the first thing you're going to be like, oh my God, did I leave?
Okay, content-wise, I think you should have a Twitch chat.
Yeah, you got to be able to.
Is it going to be a little bit more?
Is it still branched a little bit?
No, but I'm just planning like...
I don't want to say too much about my content ideas, but that's the whole point.
I think you should have Twitch chat because what makes that completely horrible?
Yeah, what makes that completely different and unprecedented on Twitch is the fact that you have the ability to interact with your audience live.
Whereas in Naked and Afraid and shit, we're just looking at them.
So you don't want to just do this.
I kind of want it to be like a social experiment in a way, or maybe a morning.
There you go.
Boom.
Oh, this is the island?
Yeah, private island for sale.
Yeah, but he would die on that island.
There's no fucking.
No, my island that I need a tropical island.
It's tropical.
You need a tropical island that you can kill and hunt.
No, I might die on that island.
There's like snakes and shit.
Yeah.
But I'll have medical, like 24-hour medical.
Okay.
Just bring an EpiPen and I'll be okay.
Or some hyper contract.
I'm over here.
Just say, just bring an EpiPen.
Yeah, EpiPen.
I have no survival.
I don't know how to serve.
I don't know how to change my tire.
Are you going to wait?
Is it LNT?
Like, you just straight up leave no trace?
Like, you have to wipe your ass with like leaves and shit?
Or is there going to be a bathroom on the island?
No bathroom.
I'm probably going to have to wipe my ass with leaves.
Wow.
Okay.
I've done shit on camera.
Like, what do you got to have space in your shit?
I'm still planning things out.
I'm going to have a place where there's no...
I have done that.
I've done without leaf shitting?
Yeah, yeah.
I've done like a survival training course that they send bad kids to, but my mom and dad didn't know I was, it was like a bad kid course.
It's actually pretty traumatic.
Some of them are like Mormon or some of them are like, you know, rehab style facilities are really fucked up.
Anyway, I did one survival training course for 21 days.
You know, you carry your fucking tent.
You do all the stuff.
You do kayaking.
You do like cool shit too in between.
But yeah, it was leave no trace.
So we had to, you know, we can't use toilet paper because you can't carry toilet paper around.
It'll destroy the environment.
So yeah, Canadian Maple Leaf was a lifesaver out there.
And you had to dig a hole if you wanted the shit.
So you're kind of experienced in this.
Yeah, but I hated it and I never want to do it again.
I'm doing this for a week.
I'm going to be honest, it's going to be torture.
What if you tap out early?
Nah, I can't.
I can't.
What if you get Stream Slivers like agent?
Then I'll have a friend.
Interesting.
But it's on a whole different continent.
That's very cool.
I like that.
That's a cool idea.
Yeah, yeah.
I've just been trying to think of the next big thing.
You really do it as a sub-a-thon, just see how long you can go for?
Hell no.
I need to cap it.
Sub-a-thon is crazy.
With accelerating rates.
So like the last day, it's like 0.1 second as a sub to keep you out in the middle of fucking nowhere.
Would you need two years to make $100 million?
I'll cap it at a week.
A month.
By myself for a week, I think I'll have a horrible time.
Yeah.
That's the point.
I feel like viewers like to see other people suffer.
Oh, yeah, which is why the Diamond Gym, people like that.
Yeah.
What's another thing?
Naked and afraid.
Yeah, anything scary.
Anything terrifying.
I mean, even back to like the most basic of shit on.
Fear factor.
I think you should probably do a little bit of training ahead of time.
Oh, no, I am.
I am.
Okay, good.
Because you can stream that training, right?
If you drop yourself into that environment, you won't make it for seven days by yourself.
100%.
I'm doing a stream first too this year.
I'm working on getting a colonoscopy on stream.
I love that.
Oh, how is that going to work?
Put a camera up your ass to look for tumors.
Have you ever heard of a colonoscopy before?
Yeah, yeah.
My dad got one actually.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Younger and younger men are getting tumors.
I had, I had, yep, I had like my cousin had colorectal cancer.
So I'm going to work.
My aunt got stage four colon cancer.
Yeah.
So I'm going to work with the colorectal cancer like alliance and all that.
Oh, you're actually, this is a real thing.
Oh, yeah.
I'm going to try and raise money.
I'll get called Will Neff Shows Whole.
That is legendary.
Yeah.
I'm going to be awake for it.
What?
Yeah.
That's I don't know about that.
Wait, yeah.
You can hit her up your ass awake.
Yeah.
If anybody can do it, he can take it.
Yeah, yeah.
I'll do that in diamond drip in the same day.
Yeah.
This man is.
You all come out of that experience a new man.
You're going to be like, this is fucking great.
Can you imagine if a doctor accidentally makes me come while he's out there?
Oh, they go past the prostate.
What if he accidentally mixes it?
No, it's not that easy.
Will, come on, man.
He would know.
I did.
No, I was sore for like three days after mine.
Oh, I wasn't talking about just like your experience with a colonoscopy.
I just meant like work in the process.
You hit the fucking prostate every time.
Right?
Come on.
Oh, oh, yes.
Yeah.
When I'm doing your butt fucking.
No, it's not in front of Jason.
I want to do that.
I'm very passionate about that.
And I think that doing it on camera would take some of the stigma out of it because I think there are a lot of men who won't get a colonoscopy because they think it's gay.
Even if stuff is, you know, in their body feels wrong.
Yeah, but like I said, what if you like it?
What if you're like, damn, he took the fuck out of my head?
Did you sleep when they do that?
Yeah, usually.
They give you a drug called profital.
It's what killed Michael Jackson.
Oh, but it's used in a surgical setting.
Fun fact.
Yeah, it did kill him.
It knocked him out completely.
He's been dead for years.
Yeah, a lot of times.
RIP.
Yeah.
Rest in peace to the king of population.
I seen him on Epstein.
You saw him on the list?
No, not on the phone.
No, there's a photo on Epstein Jet.
Yeah, he was.
Was he on the Epstein jet?
I don't know.
Damn it, Mike.
But honestly, no, I am passionate about this issue because my cousin dealt with it.
And I think it is something like younger and younger people are going to have to get colonoscopies eventually because we're all just full of microplastics.
Yeah.
Your balls are just chock full of microplastics.
Oh, yeah.
I have a colonoscopy.
I like it.
Drugs, Death, and Rest in Peace00:12:01
I just eat a credit card all the time.
That's where it collects.
Your ass and your balls apparently is where it collects.
Yeah.
Your nuts are just chock full of microplastics.
Well, if I nut a lot, does it feel like you can nut it out?
I don't think you can nut it out.
Get the microplastics out.
I think definitely it's a strategy that I've been employing.
And I hope you're not.
You're too old to get healthy as a horse.
I'm too old to get a hole from it.
Is that a thing?
No, I'm young.
I drink a lot of water bottles.
Yeah.
That's me too.
Yeah.
Fuck.
Yeah, you're probably.
LA, you don't have a choice.
It's either you die of some sort of brain-eating bacteria from the faucet or you die.
I could buy $5 glass bottles.
That's true.
You could.
And you got it like that.
Yeah.
You got a fucking, you got a Maybach.
I do got the Maybach.
You have a Maybach?
You bought a Maybach.
So crazy.
What the fuck was that?
That was a dumbass.
How much was it?
Why the fuck?
How much was that?
It was like, I put 200 down.
200 down.
That didn't even.
That didn't finish the bill.
That didn't pay it off.
Jason, you might be the first streamer that I've ever encountered that is going to hit the NBA guy who doesn't get a financial advisor.
No, I do have a financial advisor.
Is he related to you?
No.
Maybach was actually an investment because I got a new series.
That's what I said.
I knew it.
Wait, wait, how much is it total?
A new car.
You said you put $200 down?
So it was more than $200,000.
Fuck.
How is it?
You don't know how much it costs?
No, it's like, wait, no, it wasn't $200 down.
It was like $150,000 down.
And then total was like, I think the total was $200.
Oh, I have very bad.
You didn't put $150,000.
You basically bought the car then.
Basically, but I'm like billing my credit back because your credit is fine.
I'm sure.
You don't know that.
You don't get.
You're not as fine as you can.
I'm like in the 700s.
Yeah, it's fine.
It's good enough.
I do everything in the 700s.
You don't bought a Maybach.
What?
I haven't bought a Maybach.
I have an X5M comp.
That's pretty fucking good.
Wait, so you got.
So what the fuck were you thinking?
I bought a 2023, though.
So it was already depreciated.
Come on.
So here's the question.
Here's the question.
Why?
Because that's a car that you have to have a driver for.
Yes.
That's what I'm saying.
I got a driver for you.
He's an Italian guy.
I have a driver.
Oh, okay.
Well, if you need another one.
Or if y'all want to drive it.
I'll drive you around for a day.
I was going to do a show in 2026 called Get a Drive.
No, Do not let him drive your fucking car.
He's gay.
He can't drive.
Is that a stereotype?
I didn't know about that.
How many times has your car been in accidents?
Well, yeah.
Okay.
I've not been in it every time that it is.
Who was driving it?
My gay boyfriend.
And you curb that.
Gay people can't drive.
I don't curb that.
Gay people.
They struggle to drive.
There's a tribe that's going to be.
Asian people.
There's a tribe like this.
He can't.
I can't acknowledge that.
I don't agree with that.
I love Asian people driving.
He wants more Asian people.
I think the roads would be safer.
Wait.
With Asian people off the roads?
No, no, no.
Oh, no.
More were on the roads.
Come on, man.
I was saying more on the road.
Because he was implying that, I think.
No, I was not implying that.
It's crazy because I forgot about that.
Like, I forgot that that was like a racial stereotype because I feel like I haven't heard it in so long.
I hear it every day.
Really?
Well, yeah, because you're Asian.
I don't know if you're.
Do you drive well?
Why do you question them?
I don't know.
I actually don't know how to parallel park.
Really?
In LA, but our Maybach has a button where it doesn't.
I get so nervous.
Like, I feel so much pressure in LA because when you're in those fucking roads and you'll just be driving in a lane and then it'll just all of a sudden become fucking parking spots.
Right.
Yeah.
You want that motherfucker driving your car?
I will.
Probably not.
So, okay, hold on.
First of all, I own a couple luxury cars.
Okay.
I have an X5M competition.
I also have an Audi.
An Audi e-tron.
Audi RS e-tron GT.
Okay.
I got both of them.
And both.
Now, both of them have.
We don't even know how he has money.
He doesn't even work.
Everybody.
It's crazy.
How do you make money?
I've made money for years.
I've been in this business longer than both of them combined.
I mean, I still don't know.
He hasn't worked in like y'all.
He hasn't worked in like five years.
Well, regardless, I got a couple of those cars.
Now, a couple of them have been in accidents.
One, I hit my garage.
How?
My boyfriend was like, you're good.
You're good.
You're good.
And then I wasn't good.
And then I hit it.
So I trusted him.
That was a problem.
The second time he was driving.
His own garage.
Yeah.
Actually, I can't speak on this because.
Did you hit your own garage too?
No, but I was in a gym parking garage and I hit a pole.
The diamond gym?
No, not a diamond gym tool.
I did that too.
I did that too.
I backed in.
Those are like big ass.
That gym has the biggest parking lot.
I backed into a pole.
That was my first accident.
That was my old car, though.
Yeah, yeah.
I got rid of it.
Okay, so y'all both suck at driving.
I'm glad you got a driver.
I got a driver.
I can handle your car.
I'll be good.
It's insured, right?
So you just have like, do you, is it content?
Like, do you, do you get content out of it?
Is that why is that?
I got Mayback Monday.
Mayback Monday.
Oh, that's right.
Your podcast.
Yeah.
That's right.
And then Mayback Monday.
Just ride in the Maybach and talk and talk.
And I actually have a Maybach Monday on a Wednesday with Mr. Beast coming up.
Damn.
Okay, I got a guest for you.
Rick Ross.
Rick Ross?
Yes.
You know, I wish.
Mayback music.
I mean, I wish, but I think he's, you know, I don't know if he's.
That's attainable for you.
Is it?
Yes.
I think I got to put in a couple more, make up a couple more TikToks.
You have Mr. Beast?
I think arguably Mr. Beast may be more famous than Rick Ross.
Watch your fucking mouth.
Now he is.
What are you doing?
You're blowing money fast on this.
I'm just saying, I think Rick Ross is a music.
I think I'm Big Meach.
Larry Hoover.
I'm whipping work.
Rick Ross is persona.
He stole.
He stole all that.
No, he is.
He was a correctional officer.
No, I love Rick Ross.
I'm a big fan of his music.
He was Maybach music.
They specifically talks about date raping a woman by drugging her drink.
Yeah.
Explain.
Explain how you like Ricky.
Oh, my God.
Did she even know it?
What do you think that means, Austin?
Can I be so honest with you?
I haven't really looked into this.
I forgot about that lyric.
I have not looked into the lyrics.
Yeah, that's right.
I thought you didn't even listen to music.
What the fuck is this?
I know all the problematic artists.
That's why I don't listen to music at all.
I'd like to make a formal apology.
I don't endorse that.
No.
I think it's wrong.
No.
In fact.
It's right.
I'm sorry.
I didn't listen to those lyrics.
I only heard the controversy is like 20 years old.
I totally forgot about it.
You didn't know that?
No, that controversy is older than he has been alive.
Okay.
2004, baby.
2004.
Holy shit.
I was playing RuneScape.
Damn, you didn't even see 9-11.
That's crazy.
Can I ask you?
How do you feel when you see the planes at the towers?
I thought it was a video game.
What's your favorite old head shit?
Like, what is something that was before your time that you're into?
I like GameCubes.
Okay.
GameCubes, Ataris.
You play Atari.
I play Atari.
What games on Atari?
That's even before I was fucking cognizant.
Nah, that was performative.
I don't know.
Oh, you were being performative.
You don't fuck with Atari.
I know of Atari.
I'm a little bit old, though.
I know of Atari.
I don't know any games.
I know of Atari.
Now, music-wise, do you like it?
Music, Frank Sinatra.
Frank Sinatra.
Give me a Frank song.
And what is a man?
There you go.
What has he got?
Yeah, I forgot.
Then he is not.
Yeah.
I was spamming that.
Yeah, it's good.
Great song.
Good song.
Great song.
Good song.
Great song.
Another old head thing off the top of my head.
Shaggy.
Shaggy?
Like the haircut?
No, it wasn't me.
It wasn't me.
Live swung.
Oh, I know that.
Oh, the Cupid Shuffle.
No, that Cupid.
That's not Shaggy, though.
I don't know.
But, you know, Ninja Shannon.
I don't know.
That was.
You swung and you missed.
I grew up on Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon.
Ed Edinetti.
Ed Edonetti and Current Nintendo 3DS.
Nice.
Pokemon and a Toshiba laptop.
The Pokemon 30-year anniversary is coming up this month.
Isn't that crazy?
You ever seen The Grinch with Jim Carrey?
Yes.
Can I tell you how old I am?
I went and saw that in theaters.
And I remember it.
Fuck.
Yeah.
Can you believe it?
It comes at you fast.
All right.
Give us some new tech about what the Zoomers are saying.
What's some new language that we need to download?
I think y'all are up to date.
I feel like y'all are up to date.
There's not really in 2026, we're done with 6'7.
It's over.
No, no.
No more.
I don't think that's dying.
I don't think so either.
Because 6'7.
I have a niece and a nephew that I hang out with, and I and they fucking spam it.
And it's like I don't even understand it anymore.
And the more annoyed people get, the more annoyed people get, the more like Jen Alpha, because you're about to be unknown status too.
Like, you're a Zoomer.
I can't wait till the day the chat starts calling me Unk.
Oh, it's going to happen.
It's going to happen like five years.
Why do you want that?
I don't know.
I've never been called Unk for it.
I want to be, I want to be able to touch on a youth one day.
Pause.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Okay.
Rewind.
You know what I mean by that.
He wants to influence you.
Influence the youth.
In a positive way.
When I'm more wiser and my frontal lobe is developed, I want to be able to.
I feel like we did influence you a little bit when you were a youth, but in a negative way with the shit that we were putting out there.
Oh, yeah, for sure.
Because you grew up on Twitch, unfortunately.
I grew up on Twitch.
I was watching all y'all, to be honest.
Really?
Yeah.
Even me.
No.
Thank you.
You're being performed.
I can tell now.
I know you're lying to me.
Yeah.
I think you can see through me.
I've seen that.
He brought up Janice Griffith.
The first time me and Jason did a collab, he was like, You were a fan of her poetry.
That's crazy.
That's a deep.
Do you know me and Malcova?
Who?
Who the fuck is that?
Come on.
Just curious.
But yeah, I was watching all that stuff.
I was watching Cutie, Baked Cakes for Ms. Kiff.
What a time that was.
Yeah, I grew up on Twitch, grew up on YouTube.
I was low-key on every part of the internet.
Yeah.
As a 14-year-old kid, I could have been outside riding my bike.
That's what I mean.
That's right.
Okay.
Nah, I was just like fat.
Not a chubby.
I was like chubby growing up.
That makes me trust you more.
Thank you.
Wait, we were both fat.
Yeah.
Do we have a photo?
Show us how fat you are.
Because I'm going to judge you.
If it's not actually fat, I don't know.
I had a fat era too.
I don't believe that.
I did.
I did.
Okay, hold on.
I'm going to guess.
Before or after eight years old?
Before.
Yeah, it doesn't fucking count.
I know it's before.
You can't say it's baby fat, dude.
What are you talking about?
Before eight?
I was insecure about it.
That's no.
You don't get to claim having a fat phase if you weren't fat when you were like, you know, already producing semen.
Oh, yeah.
That's baby fat.
No, no.
This was literally this was 10th grade.
Oh, you look like that in 10th grade?
Yeah.
I was also a late bloomer.
Yeah, clearly.
Developing a Hispanic Accent00:05:15
Very late bloomer.
Did you change your vernacular?
Did you speak differently when you were like that?
I, yeah.
Okay.
Wait, were you nerdy?
Like, were you speaking nerdy back then?
I think, I think so, yeah.
What were you, how were you talking back then?
Do it.
I was, I was speaking like how y'all spoke.
Like, cause I was, I was growing up all of y'all.
So.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay.
But then, like, you know, I hung out with a lot of Mexicans because I'm from Arlington, Texas.
My school.
My school had literally 90% Mexican people.
So I kind of developed a Hispanic accent.
Did you speak any Spanish?
I do, actually.
Oh, really?
See, I'm locoming.
Oh, you like ass.
Wait a minute.
What?
You eat asshole?
Or you, you like?
No, no, you, you, you like asshole?
No, eat.
No, you eat.
You eat.
No, no.
I just learned that from my friend.
You eat ass.
I know Pendo.
I know.
Yose.
Yose.
Hold that.
Biblioteca?
Biblioteca.
Gotcha.
I took Spanish too, so I know a good amount of Spanish.
I was like, I just get racist with it and say Esteban.
Esteban.
What race do you think I am?
I think you asked me on the last one.
He asked everybody, every time.
Yes, yes.
Oh, I was at a club this weekend and somebody.
Oh, no, no, no.
No, I got a story before that.
I was at a club this weekend.
I went for New Year's Eve.
I went out to a club and I walk into the club and immediately some guy comes up to me.
He says, Habibi, are you Lebanese?
Dude, dude, dude, he knows.
I said, yes, I'm Lebanese.
How did you know?
I said, do you know who I am?
And he's like, no, I have no idea.
You just look Lebanese.
I said, duck, you so why is it that every time you do?
I do.
Every time we go out, this never happens.
Every time he goes out by himself, oh, someone noticed I'm Lebanese.
Every time.
But here, I got a club story for you.
Oh, no.
New Year's Eve.
I, of course, go to bed predictably at 12.35.
I thought you told me you were going out.
I did.
And I left at 12.05 and I was in bed by 12.35.
Oh, my God, bro.
A son.
That is a new level of life.
I had to wake up in the morning.
No, hold on.
I had to wake up in the morning and shoot a podcast.
12.05?
I always leave at 12.05.
No, you don't, bitch.
I've known you.
We've gone to the next step.
No, no, no, that's part of the money.
I'm saying now I always leave it at 1205.
What do you mean, like, that's not true?
Because at Tara Yumby's party, you were chilling there for a bit.
No, on New Year's Eve, I'm saying I'm New Year's Eve.
I'm an old man.
So blow my spot, Jason.
No, blow his spot up.
We're not all like that.
Blow his spot.
I was out till 3, 4 in the morning.
Okay, well, I know because I get a text message.
I went to bed at 1.25 the next day.
Oh, fuck.
Wait, what Christmas?
Oh, fuck.
That's crazy.
Anyway, I got a text.
Listen, let's forget about what time I went to bed.
Who cares?
I'm responsible.
It's all good.
You know, I had a podcast in the morning.
So I wake up to a text message from an Austin show.
I'm going to read it out loud.
Oh, no.
Oh, Lord.
I wake up to a text message.
I can't believe he's airing me out like that.
That is somewhat of a conjugate.
I was drunk, too.
Was it like a good text?
I mean, it wasn't bad.
Not even like happy New Year's.
He goes, you've made me so fucking famous, Lamau.
Happy New Year.
Oh, wow.
What happened?
I was drunk.
He's showing gratitude.
I was showing gratitude because I went to the gate.
Some specific.
I was at the club and people kept coming.
A bunch of Fear Ann fans were coming up all over the place.
Oh, my God, Fearan, Fear Ann.
And a lot of them were like, where's Sashan?
And I'm like, every single person that came to me was like, where's the son?
I was like, bro, he's homophobic.
I was actually countdown LA.
Yeah.
At three in the morning.
Yes.
Eyes like dinner plates.
Yes.
And I was talking to a fan.
They're like, where's the son?
And I went, the thing is, I was showing gratitude and appreciation for the success and to the people of the Fear Ann podcast that show support.
What did you do for New Year?
In public?
New Year's.
I was at the ball drop in New York.
Oh, you were in New York?
Yeah.
Did you see the Brooklyn Bridge?
I did see the Brooklyn Bridge.
It's gorgeous.
It's amazing.
Which brings us to our next topic.
Which brings us to our next rest of the year.
Bam bam bam bam.
Scams, Homophobia, and Late Nights00:12:20
Wait, I don't know what it transitions.
It's time for an America me up.
So I'm going to need Jason riding a bald eagle editor, fly him through.
Yes, and make his muscles look very bulbous, too.
And then the twin towers just collapse out.
Yeah, bald eagle.
Jason is flying in the nerve.
Let's go.
Mercedes.
Cut that up.
Okay.
I could never run for president after that.
Listen.
You could be the first gay president.
You're right.
You're right.
That's why it's so funny that like older people.
There's got to be a gay president.
There probably already has been, to be honest.
Do the America Me Up.
And then I want to talk about the pressure.
And then we can talk about.
Okay.
Today we're going to talk about a gentleman named George C. Parker.
And this America Me Up is brought to you by Austin Show, who messaged me while I was at home, so excited that he had found a suitable person for America Me Up.
Have you ever heard America Me Up?
Have you ever heard of this?
Okay.
I try and find some of the most bizarre and cherished memories throughout American history.
It initially started so he could make me feel more American.
Yes.
Oh, what the fuck?
Yeah, it takes pictures.
So it's the late 1800s.
All right.
We're in New York City.
George C. Parker is a con man who is elevating his game gradually, but his con is selling real estate that he doesn't own.
So George, I hear you.
Is that where Don Truck?
The fucking shark, man.
Keep going, keep going, keep going.
That's crazy, though.
So George C. Parker becomes a master of forging documents.
And he'll sell the documents to apartments, homes, a lot of different things in New York.
And he sells them to impressionable, wealthy tourists.
Let's say a tourist has come from Mother Russia with big money and dream of making money in the United States.
George C. Parker goes, well, let me put you in bed with an apartment building right here.
And he was a master at this, but it wasn't big enough for George C. Parker.
He kept scaling his effort until he sold monuments in the United States.
He sold the Statue of Liberty one time to a wealthy land baron.
He sold a general's tomb in New York City.
And then finally, his biggest scheme, he sold the Brooklyn Bridge.
He convinced a buyer to buy the Brooklyn Bridge.
And he would do this by renting office space.
Bring these wealthy people in.
He'd have actors pretending to be a part of his operation.
He'd have fake documents and he would sell them the Brooklyn Bridge.
And he did this a few times.
And apparently, people didn't report it because it was so embarrassing.
And then people did start reporting it.
And the police would be like, there's no way someone was dumb enough to buy the Brooklyn Bridge.
And then enough people reported that this that they were like, this guy has to be real.
So they started tracking him down.
But every time he would sell the Brooklyn Bridge, he would change his location.
He'd change his story.
He'd make all new documents.
So finally, after years, after selling the Brooklyn Bridge many times for the equivalent of millions of dollars, they finally caught him, George C. Parker, and he went to jail for many years until he became good behavior and they let him file documents for the jail, right?
No, that's the worst thing.
For let him file documents for the jail.
Come on, John.
Apparently, one day during the winter, when a warden left a jacket and his hat on a post, he forged a document, threw on the jacket and the hat and walked right out of the prison.
And he got free till he was about 70 years old when they caught him for a fake $100 check when they changed how they approved checks.
And he spent the rest of his life in Sing Sing prison.
But here's the thing.
He only scammed very wealthy people.
So he became like a legend.
And people in Sing Sing prison talked about him with such reverence as like a Robin Hood that his fame started to echo out into different echelons of society.
And famously, it started being used in movies.
If you believe that, I got a bridge I can sell you.
So the famous old saying, if you believe that, I got a bridge I can sell you.
Or if you're looking for lakefront property in Tahoe, all that, it comes from George C. Parker scamming people in Brooklyn in the eight or in the 1890s.
He's considered the greatest con man of all time.
Bro.
How'd he do it?
Well, he became a master of forging documents and he also would have like elaborate costumes to pretend to be different officials.
Also, it was the 1890s.
Like it didn't take scam people.
But I was just thinking about that and I feel like, you know, that was the peak era to scam people.
Yeah.
But now is also kind of the peak era to scam people with people.
Like crypto currency and like AI and all this shit.
So I feel like nowadays, it's easier to scam people in some ways and it's harder to scam people the old-fashioned way like this guy did.
But the scammers nowadays are just so ass.
Like they're so bottom of the barrel.
Like, oh, look, they're just scamming the elderly.
No, it's like shit fart coin.
Like everybody kind of knows this is a scam, but you're still buying it because you think you can scam other people.
It sucks.
We got to get back to the old-fashioned way.
That's what I'm saying.
I think like give me a little pageantry if you're going to scam me.
Yeah, I think like George Suppier's, first of all, the second time they caught him, they should just let him go.
For sure.
Like at that point, it's just like this guy is, he's so good.
Yeah.
That, you know, he keep an eye on him, right?
Don't let him scam like too many people.
But every now and then you just let him let him have a good one.
I got to give it up to my old dad because I was on the way to the Portland airport and he was giving me a ride and he was telling me that story and I picked up the phone and I texted Will.
Shouts out to Papa Shell.
I hope he watched this.
I hope I did the story justice.
No, I'm going to link it to him.
I used to scam.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Online.
What would you scam?
So I remember this method because I was doing anything to make money without getting a job.
Right.
Chud.
Yep.
Chud.
Chud.
There was this like honey.com.
I don't know if y'all know what that is.
Yeah, we know what that is.
You mean sex honey?
No, no, honey.com.
It's like a link click aggregator thing.
I thought you were talking about the dick honey that people beat in recently.
Dick honey.
I don't know what that is.
That's some freak issues I don't know about.
What?
Like honey honey.
You talking about honey pack.
Yeah.
Oh, no.
Dick honey.
I don't know what the fuck.
He was talking about a honey pack.
Go on.
Honey is also a scam in and of itself, though.
Okay, okay.
Well, they were doing like this thing for a week where it's like every account that you make, you make $10.
So I would like, I would have an IP proxy generator.
Okay.
And I would just keep making accounts on different IPs and different emails.
How much money did you make?
Maybe like 300 bucks.
Nice.
What?
He was probably a teenager.
Yeah.
I was like 16.
Yeah.
That's a lot of fun.
That's a lot of 18 honey.
That's a lot of fucking stuff.
I was like, let's fucking go.
I'm not going to let that.
I'm going to spam for way more than you did.
Way more.
I did NFTs, though.
Ooh, yeah.
Actually, wait, when you were a streamer?
No, it was like right before I started streaming.
I was doing that.
You did NFTs?
Yeah.
Before we go.
Sure.
How much?
What are we at?
Oh.
Well, before we, no, no, no, before we end this, we got it.
It's the new year.
It's the first episode.
We have to talk about.
No, we have to talk about it.
You can keep that on the Patreon if you'd like.
Okay.
Because we have to do New Year's resolutions.
Ah, I haven't done mine yet.
Fuck that shit.
All right.
Who's starting?
Austin.
Go ahead.
I haven't thought about it.
Oh, yeah.
We did New Year's resolutions last time.
Resolution.
No, but we have a guest here.
And also, it's the first episode.
I already said I'm not going to let fear dictate my life like I did in 2025.
Boring.
Give us a new one because it's 2026.
My dad.
That was a 2025 New Year's resolution.
You're in it now.
Venezuela has been invaded.
It's a totally different environment.
You want me to invade a country?
I can't do it.
No, I'm just saying, like, the dynamic of shit.
Go around.
I wasn't thinking.
Go around.
Dynamic is shifting.
You've obviously thought about your resolutions.
No, I haven't.
I have not.
Motherfucker.
I'm just courting.
Let me tell my goddamn story and we'll give our resolutions.
That's crazy.
Tell the story.
You're the kaibosh on a good fucking story.
You don't have a resolution.
You want to even talk about that?
He just said he hasn't, but he doesn't.
Okay, all right.
Go ahead.
You tell, because we talked about ours.
Let's talk about Jason.
Will wasn't there.
I got it.
Fuck.
What's the story?
I want to hear the story though.
Yeah.
All right.
All right.
Tell the story.
Marsh doesn't want to hear the story.
No, it's such a good story that we're going to keep it behind the paywall.
All right.
Keep the story behind the paywall at patreon.com slash fear on New Year's Resolution.
You want my New Year's resolution?
Yeah.
This is bullshit.
Look at this.
Look at this abuse that I take.
Yeah.
Another year of this.
That's my new resolution.
Not to take his shit.
I'm going to kick his ass.
I'm going to whoop his shit.
I'm going to bust into your streamer one day with a cane and just start beating his ass.
That's right.
And then I'm going to start a right-wing fucking content.
There's a lot of fears I have in the right.
All right.
All right.
My New Year's resolution.
God, fuck this.
Fuck on the fucking New Year's resolution.
I don't know.
New Year's resolution.
Are you having a crisis?
Because I don't want to.
My New Year's resolution is I'm taking more time off.
That's great.
My resolution was to stop letting fear dictate my life, and y'all threw it out.
It's boring.
Have you ever had a fucking resolution that like, nah, it's not fucking good enough?
That's bullshit.
Have you ever seen that?
I don't want to.
It was like deep as shit.
It was emotional and vulnerable.
All right, Jason.
All right.
What's your newest resolution?
Or was that one that they just threw it out the window?
No.
Yeah, we're assholes.
They threw mine out the window.
I'm going to be honest.
I have the default one.
Get six packs.
Hey, me too.
Me too.
Me too.
You want a six-pack?
I'm trying to get a six-pack.
Y'all, nobody listens to me.
How do I get one?
I'm telling you, like, I don't.
Stop eating.
No, no, no.
I got you.
I'll put you on a diet plan, and you will be shredded by the end of it.
He's right.
He is.
He is the most shredded out of us.
If you want to get strong.
If you're strong, you come to Uncle Will.
If you want to be aesthetic, you go to Austin Show.
If you talk to you both, if you actually got to train strong and be prosperous and healthy.
What do you mean, live long?
I mean, I just want to look good.
I don't give a fuck about anything else.
If you just want to look good, come to me.
If you want to look good and longevity, you go to him.
But you can go to a combination of that.
He's not less good, though.
He's not aesthetic.
That's not true.
No, no.
He is all physique.
Like, he's all aesthetic.
You've seen me, no homo.
You've seen some of my favorite people.
I've seen him.
But homo, we always say there's fit and then there's gay fit.
Yeah.
I don't understand.
There's a fit.
Like as a straight man, you can be you can be fit.
But then there's another level of fit above gay fit.
It's a different level of gay body.
Gay body is out of control because it's normal.
Because a woman will give you a pass as long as you look, you know.
But a gay dude is like, that guy's out of shape.
You could be out of shape with a six-pack if you're gay.
You know what I mean?
Like a lot of pressure in the gay community.
Yeah.
Is that why you got the six-pack?
Yeah, I'm into it.
I also like the way.
Have you ever been to the We Ho Equinox?
It's serious.
These men are insane.
Six as fuck.
You will sit down next to a dude who's like 65 years old and the most peeled guy you've ever seen in your entire life.
Yeah, gay as fuck.
It's just like, you know, he's hardly circuit gay.
No.
They're wearing big metal necklaces.
They got bald heads.
Oh, yeah.
They look like they just carried boulders around.
Yeah, they look like they've been doing peptides before people even knew about them.
Like their skin is leathery.
Yeah, dude.
Like the dancers at the Abbey, the go-go dancers, they're fucking like circuit gays.
Circuit basically means they go to all the parties, like all these parties, circuit parties.
Pressure in the Gay Community00:01:50
Yeah.
They just like hop to one party.
I'm going to play Atari and do peptide.
I'm telling you, it's fucking crazy.
Being gay is crazy.
Six-pack.
Good pack wedding.
You're a six-pack.
I'm six-pack, too.
Tell us the story.
We're going to do a long episode.
You want me to tell the story, or should we save it for the paywall?
I'm advocating for you.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
Patreon.com slash patreon.com slash spearhand.
What a great cliffhanger.
Wait, wait a minute, before we go.
Huge thank you.
Give it up for Jason DeWin.
Appreciate y'all for having the honor.
Prolific, talented, charismatic young people on the internet.
I'm so excited to see you become an unknown.
That's right.
And give good guidance.
When I'm an unknown, you're going to be dead.
Really, grandma.
Fucking dead.
Now, Jason, you are incredible.
You're very talented.
And we look forward to seeing what's next in your career.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Life-wise.
Jason DeWeen, everybody.
Stay dangerous.
We'll see you behind the paywall or next week.
Thank you so much.
And I don't think you want to.
Conversation goes on.
And he goes, I look at my phone again and he goes, shall we exchange photos now?
And I'm like, and by the way, for those of you that don't know, exchange photos, it was basically like, hey, it's time to go home.
Yeah.
Show me news.
And I'm at this point, I'm starting to get upset because I'm like, how unprofessional.
I met you in a professional environment.
Why are you taking it here?
Why are you going to make it awkward?
Like, I'm starting to get upset.
Starting to get upset.
I'm like, this is ridiculous.
I start to call Liam, and then I look a little further and I realize the person I was messaging was not my friend.