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Jan. 28, 2025 - The David Knight Show

08:01

Royal Navy Chases Farting Whale, Thinking It’s Russia Sub

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	In other news, we learn that Pee Wee Herman, also known as Paul Rubens, that was his acting name, not his character name, he came out as homosexual in a posthumous documentary.
	He says, quote, I was secretive about my sexuality.
	I know, this is one of the worst kept secrets ever.
	Who would have thought this?
	I think that, quite frankly, was the funniest thing he ever said.
	Next, we're going to find out that Boy George is going to be coming out soon.
	Who knew that Pee Wee Herman was, you know, my gaydar was just pinned all the way over to the right.
	But Russia is winning by three touchdowns, says, Senator Tommy, I think it's Tuberville.
	I used to call him Tuberville, but it's Tuberville.
	I don't listen to news.
	I read news.
	Sometimes I go back and it's such a simple name.
	I thought, oh, I know how to say that.
	I guess I said it wrong.
	So I'm not really sure.
	But this might be why Russia is ahead by three touchdowns.
	We had, as reported in the UK, a farting whale set off a...
	Russian submarine, a false alarm.
	British ships spent several days tracking down a suspected Russian stealth submarine.
	Because, you know, climate change is our greatest threat.
	We know that from the American military as well as the UK military.
	They were getting suspicious sonar signatures.
	I mean, this is sound.
	This is not, you know, electromagnetic radiation.
	This is sound.
	It was making...
	A suspicious sound.
	And, you know, this is really serious because, you know, a whale is a very large animal, and it has not one but two blowholes that apparently it may have actually belonged to a farting whale at a Royal Navy source.
	Two mystery sounds were picked up off the northwestern coast of Scotland, according to the UK tabloid.
	They were convinced that it was man-made, and the Royal Navy went on a deep-sea hunt.
	We've been analyzing the sounds, and we now believe that it was a marine mammal, a whale.
	And we're taking it very seriously, you know, because this is CO2. This is a massive eruption of CO2. It needs to be taken very seriously.
	We have to assume the worst.
	I can't think of anything much worse than that, if you're anywhere in the vicinity.
	may have been trying to deploy sensors in order to obtain the acoustic signatures of Royal Navy submarines.
	That's what they surmised.
	They thought that was what the Russian military was doing.
	But in actuality, it was a whale.
	You know, when I was back in high school, I remember one of the albums, I buy all kinds of crazy stuff.
	One of the albums I got was Songs of the Humpback Whale.
	I don't know if they're going to have a volume two with a flatulence of a humpback whale.
	Now, that would be maybe an interesting sound.
	I don't know.
	The New York Post, in reporting this, said that called the incident...
	The Hunt for Red Farttober.
	Yeah, that's right.
	And it's just like Chicago had said.
	And, you know, when we look back, Shakespeare evidently was right when he said that there was something rotten in Denmark.
	They have discovered a 66-million-year-old vomit in Denmark.
	Something is very rotten in Denmark and has been rotten, therefore.
	A very long time.
	Somebody found this stuff, took the fragments to a museum for examination, and they dated the vomit to the end of the Cretaceous era some 66 million years ago.
	I'll tell you what the biggest rotten thing is, and that is their dating methods.
	If you ever look at their dating methods, you find out that their dating methods are circular logic.
	Well, we know how old this is because of the layer that was found.
	And we know how old that layer is because of what's found in it.
	You know, that's basically the way these guys operate.
	This is all as useful as a PCR test.
	They're dating methods.
	So, you know, the PCR tests are something that is rotten, not just in Denmark, but everywhere.
	The PCR tests are basically a kind of vomit, although it is only just a few decades old.
	Arabica coffee now.
	It's the latest thing that we're told is going to be extremely expensive.
	So by the time you look at eggflation and the government killing off chickens by the millions and destroying our food supply, killing off small farms, that's the real key about all that.
	But now Arabica coffee prices are going to be expensive, so it's going to be pretty hard to get eggs and coffee in the morning.
	And then we have Washington, D.C. This article from the Washington Post saying, D.C. is America's loneliest city.
	And they ask, can a thousand robotic pets help?
	You know, there's an old saying about Washington, D.C. They said, if you want a friend in D.C., get a dog.
	Well, evidently, even the dogs don't like the people in the district, the criminals of the district of criminals.
	These politicians are going to have to get a robot.
	High Booth says, Whistler make a new Hitchcock AI commercial.
	Maybe one with Captain Ahab.
	There she blows.
	And I guess we will play as we go out.
	We'll have a reprise of Hitchcock talking about the Flatulent Earth Society.
	Have a good day.
	Good evening.
	Tonight's tale is a story of paranoia and a most unexpected perpetrator, the common cow.
	Or, more specifically, what comes out the other end.
	Yes, the air is thick with intrigue, as it seems that in our modern age of propaganda, even a humble bovine's backside can be branded a national security threat.
	The menace is invisible, silent.
	Yet deadly.
	Carefully contrive to panic the masses into accepting the government stepping in, jackboots and all, with their solutions.
	Because who better to stop a gaseous threat than a bunch of political windbags?
	But one must wonder, is this truly about saving the planet, or are we simply being led to pasture?
	Is it merely a MacGuffin?
	The David Knight Show serves as a breath of fresh air for those who still believe that truth can stand up to scrutiny.
	And he's found that the government narrative smells suspiciously like a load of bull.
	So if you want to help others catch wind of the BS being shoveled out of Washington, please consider supporting the show.
	And now back to our regularly scheduled program.
	You're listening to The David Knight Show.
	That's right, boys and girls.
	There's a post-election sale on silver and gold.
	Trump euphoria has caused a dip in silver and gold.
	It's time to buy some medals with fiat dollars before they come to their sense.
	Go to davidknight.gold to get in touch with the wise wolf himself, Tony Arterburn.

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