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Dec. 20, 2022 - Danny Jones Podcast
01:31:33
#166 - Joe Rogan, Politics, and Conspiracy Theories | David Lucas

David Lucas defends Joe Rogan as a visionary building Austin's comedy utopia, dismissing racism claims while citing Tuskegee and CIA PSYOPs to debunk vaccine safety narratives. The discussion critiques celebrity gender politics, speculates on the Will Smith altercation involving Tupac's mother's Black Panther ties, and debates 5G conspiracy theories alongside Kanye West's mental health. Lucas contrasts Trump's unity with current divisiveness, recounts a Tampa encounter with DeSantis, and links extreme leftists to the KKK via segregation examples before reflecting on his daughters and upcoming show at The Mothership. Ultimately, the episode suggests America's decline stems from cultural obsession rather than simple aggression. [Automatically generated summary]

Transcriber: CohereLabs/cohere-transcribe-03-2026, WAV2VEC2_ASR_BASE_960H, sat-12l-sm, script v26.04.01, and large-v3-turbo

Time Text
Carving Out A Comedy Niche 00:02:58
Last time you were here, you were like one of the opening acts.
Now you're the headliner at the show you're doing down here.
Yeah, man.
You're on the come ups, huh?
A lot changes in two years, bro.
Like, yeah, the last time I was down here two years ago, like in September, I was definitely just like an opening comedian.
And I was even catching a hard time for that.
Like, Tyler set something up that they do, Tyler.
And now I'm fucking headlining and we just added a show because they're selling out.
So that's so sick, bro.
I explained to you, like, I was telling Johnny last week when he was here, like, I would shout out to Johnny Mitchell.
Johnny, yeah, he's sick.
Your style of comedy is so much different than a lot of people because, to me at least, when I watch you and I listen to you talk to people, especially when you're roasting people, I feel like the main difference is a lot of other guys, I can tell they're trying really, really hard.
Like, I can tell, it's obvious that they worked hard on the shit they're talking about and their bit or whatever.
But you, I feel like it feels like you're not even trying.
It feels like it just comes natural to you.
Well, yeah, I mean,.
You know, not to toot my own horn, but that's the difference between somebody being good and somebody being great.
You know what I'm saying?
Like anybody who does something and it looks effortless, you know, that's like when you're like, oh, this guy is a natural, instead of somebody who's not really a natural comic and they're trying to really be a comedian.
Like you can, you know, the difference in everything.
Like somebody can practice real hard and be a great baseball player, but you can tell people who are born to play baseball.
There's a big difference.
You know what I'm saying?
And then Being able to combine like the discipline and putting in like the hard work and the time into it, as well as having that natural ability, that's really what sets people off.
10,000 hours, there's a noise.
10,000 hours, they got a noise.
Oh, it's the AC.
Oh, okay, yeah.
We, we, I dub it out after.
Oh, okay, it's not super annoying, is it?
I just, I mean, you can think, right?
Yeah, I think for y'all, I was like, yeah, do they hear that?
No, I'm real sensitive to noises.
I'm, I gotta get the AC system replaced in this thing, piece of, but yeah, um, yeah, 10,000 is that like the Malcolm Gladwell?
Uh, thing he talks about, but it's real because, like, uh, you can feel myself becoming more of a natural on stage, and it's becoming more just like a seventh sense instead of like actually going out and do comedy.
So it's like I'm just going on stage and giving you my personality while I'm performing instead of, I mean, I still have a set that you know I've written and prepared, but you know, um, like, like you'll look at comedians in the early days, like, if you look at Dave Chappelle.
Like a lot of stuff you do in your early days is real jokey.
And then the more you do it and you become great, it becomes like more of you.
Finding Your Natural Voice 00:10:03
Like nobody else can say it but you.
Like if you look at Dave Chappelle now.
So, like, that's the growth.
You know, some people don't like it, but it's just, it's just, it's what comes natural.
You mean you kind of like fall into like this own lane you've created?
Like you kind of like carved out a niche for yourself and like a certain style.
So you kind of like more like lean into that harder and harder.
Yeah.
Once you find your voice, that's what.
You know, you'll hear a lot of comedians talk about finding your voice on stage, and that's what they mean.
Like, you know, like, I can go on stage and rant for 20 minutes and it's not prepared.
Right.
Because I found my voice and I know what inflictions I should say and what's going to be funny and what's not going to be funny.
So I know how to say it and why to say it and where to say it.
Right.
Yeah.
You definitely know how to read the room.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's very important, man.
Like, a lot of comedians always ask me for advice, and I'm like, bro, just.
Just be funny.
Like, you know, stop trying to have a scientific formula to be funny.
Like, just be funny.
Yeah.
Just be you.
Yeah, just be you, bro.
Yeah.
Go on stage and be you.
You said you just moved to Austin?
Yeah, I'm out there in Austin now.
How long have you been there?
Since August.
So I moved.
Joe moved you down?
Yeah, man.
No, Rogan had to get all the best down there.
He had to get all the best people down there, man.
He's creating like a comedy utopia, man.
I mean, didn't like Duncan move down there too?
Yeah, he moved down there.
Tim Dillon, Tony Henshaw.
Tim Dillon, yeah.
So, what's the scene like there now?
Is it just like way bigger than it was before all that?
I'm sure.
So, the first time I ever went to Austin was shortly after I did your podcast, which was like December 2020.
Yeah.
And Rogan was there.
They had done a couple of shows, and I came down there to do some shows with Tony, and then I would hit up other spots.
And the scene just wasn't a scene, like it was just people on stage, you know, writing some.
I mean, local people and stuff, yeah, saying some they just wrote that day.
And it's like, bro, I'm like, if this, like, it's not gonna make me better, you know what I'm saying?
I'm like, if this is the fucking thing, yeah, because I'm like, if this, because in LA, bro, you might have to follow a killer, you might have to follow, you gotta be ready, you might have to follow a Theo Von in LA, and you're like, oh, I'm gonna bring my A game, but these here.
You're like, what the fuck is this?
You know what I'm saying?
Right.
So, Rogan started doing a residency, and I do it a lot with him.
It's every Tuesday, and well, most every Tuesday and Wednesday.
What does that mean, residency?
Or you just continuously do shows at the same place.
Oh, okay.
I got you.
Yeah.
So, he does a residency at this place called A Vulcan, and that's pretty much every Tuesday and Wednesday.
And that's a great show to be on.
Like, he expects new material.
He doesn't want you to do the same thing over and over again.
He really challenges comedians.
And Um, that's why when he opens his club, it's gonna be the best club in the nation, in my opinion, because I don't feel like any comedy club has ever opened a comedy club to focus on the comedian.
Every you know, comedy club has opened focused on how we're gonna make money, it's how we're gonna maximize profits.
So he's actually opening a comedy club where it's like comedian first, you know what I'm saying?
Right?
He doesn't have to worry about the business side, I mean, you do, but not like.
You're not doing it just because you have to make some money.
It's kind of like, that's like his whole, like, bro.
Like, Rogan's so dope, bro.
Like, and, and, and like I said, I've never seen a comedy club be built before, but he'll bring us all in.
He'll be like, what do you think about this?
What should we do?
And it's like, damn, like, I have input in one of probably that's going to be a historic comedy club.
Yeah.
And I, like, I have input.
What you think about this color?
What you think about that color?
What you think about this many seats?
What you think about having drapes right here?
Like, we should lower the ceiling so that the sound.
It's like, wow, I have input.
You know what I'm saying?
So it's like mind blowing.
And it's taking a while because he's taking his time to fine tune everything so that we have the best lighting, so that we have whatever, the best measurements, so that the sound stays in the room the best.
So we were there a few months ago.
I believe it was maybe August.
Yeah, I had just freshly moved.
So either August or September.
And Louis C.K. was in town.
And he told Rogan, he's like, these ceilings are way too tall.
Really?
Yeah, he's like, these ceilings are just like that.
Yeah, and Rogan was like, well, what we got to do?
How tall do they got to be?
Yeah, and so he lowered the ceilings, man, like seven feet.
No way.
Just because, you know.
Feels more intimate, maybe?
More intimate in the laughter.
Like, you know, you get a full, you put 250, 250 people in a room.
I think the one room holds 250, another one's going to hold like 175.
But you put 250 people in a room that's built to hold sound and the ceilings are low.
It's going to sound like you're in a fucking arena.
Yes.
That's good he's doing that, bro.
You know damn well he didn't do any of that when he set up that red podcast studio.
He didn't talk to anybody.
He might have talked to one guy.
Yo, what should I do to this?
Make it look like fucking a red hellscape.
That.
Bro, that's him.
Yeah, that was Joe's vision for sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That was him building what he wanted.
Like, bro, even when we were talking about designs, he's like, yeah, I want the bar to look like the bar from The Shining.
Oh, shit, man.
You know what I'm saying?
So it's like, bro, you got money.
You know what I'm saying?
You got money like that.
And he's real passionate about comedy, but more so, he's more passionate about the comedian.
You know what I'm saying?
The experience being there.
He takes care of all his friends.
You know what I'm saying?
That's why it was easy.
For me to stick up for him when motherfuckers were trying to call him a racist.
Yeah.
And I was like, well, if this is a racist, give me more.
Yeah, yeah.
I think I like racism.
Bro, it's so crazy how a lot of the comedians will just fucking turn their backs on people when they get called out for being racist or saying some like anti Jew shit on the media or whatever.
Yeah, but these comedians will never make it.
Yeah.
These comedians will never make it.
Or if they make it, you know, they'll be soy boys.
You know what I'm saying?
So it's like, it's like, bro, your time's going to come.
Like, there's going to be a time when some shit.
About it's inevitable if you're in the spotlight, some is gonna come your way.
It just you're gonna have some, you're gonna have some disgruntled, you're gonna have some old employee, you're gonna have something where somebody tries to take from you because America is just a greedy place.
So, if somebody sees an opening and they try to you know slide into that opening, then they can cook up whatever story.
And it's like, bro, like if a girl came out from 15 years ago and she was like, I didn't really want to have sex with him, but we had sex, it's like, I don't know, like.
Maybe I did talk you into it because that's what guys do.
Yeah, that's what guys do.
Let's go get a drink and see how you feel.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, come on, girl, let me just stick it in a little bit.
Yeah.
Let me get 10 pumps.
Let me get 10 pumps.
Every guy has done that.
Yeah, no doubt.
Every guy has coerced his way into a girl's vagina.
Yeah, that's what men do.
That's what animals do.
Every guy has been like, come on, man, you boy, let me just eat it.
Let me suck on your tits.
Like, every guy has done that.
So, you know, if some girl were to say, he coached me into having sex with him, it, It could be true.
That's the game.
That's life.
Every guy, you know, takes a bitch out for drinks in hopes that she gets loose and go home to fuck.
Is that wrong?
You know what I'm saying?
Like, I feel like it's a big difference in me taking you to drinks to get loose versus like popping something in your drink, like Bill Kaiser.
Yeah.
Bro, the crazy thing about that whole N word thing with Joe that they tried to cancel him for is I saw what I don't remember how long ago, maybe it had to have been over a year ago before the whole thing happened with.
Recently with him, yeah.
When he was doing his stand up routine and he actually brought it up during his stand up routine, he's like, There's a video out there of me saying the n word compilation a bunch of times, and he was like, I forget what the joke was, but he was like, Even I went, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like, Even I thought I sounded, even I thought I was racist for a second, yeah.
He uh, like, bro, he before it came out, you know what I'm saying, he uh, he told all of us, yeah, I'm like, Bro, like, I know your heart, dog, like, even if you called a black person n word, I'd be like, Joe, you.
Up, but I know your heart, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, I know your heart, dog.
Like, and you know, you've helped me take care of my kids and you've helped me establish myself in Austin.
So, what I know, right?
I know this dude's heart.
It's a great man.
He's opened his house to me and, you know, opened his money to me, his pockets and opportunities to me.
So it's like, bro, like I know your heart.
And if you're advancing people of color, like, I don't see any racist traits in your body.
Right.
And it's like Patrice O'Neill said, man, comedians are all trying to be funny.
And Patrice said, the birth of a funny joke and an unfunny joke come from the same place.
And you don't know if it's funny.
Until you say it.
And Rogan gets stoned.
He gets high.
And I can see how the story of the Planet Apes and I felt like I was in Planet Apes came about.
You're trying to be funny.
I've tried to be funny before and it came out racist and you just didn't say it.
You're like, oh, fuck.
You know what I'm saying?
That happens.
Especially, you know, you're on your podcast.
You know, if we started drinking and passing a blunt around and we started talking about Indians or Asians or whatever, something racist.
Can come out because I might say a funny thing, then he tries his thing at being funny and it might not come out right.
Tuskegee And Vaccine Trust 00:03:11
But people were not in that moment.
They take stuff out of context.
Yeah.
And then they run with it.
And, you know, it's just.
What's up?
Oh, the Rogan video.
But whenever you're in a situation where you have to say, I'm not racist, you fed up.
And I clearly have fed up.
That's weird.
It's all good, Joe.
You could tell they edited that too.
Like, there were some cuts.
They cut it down to be shorter.
The media hated on Joe because of his whole stance on the COVID vaccines.
Yeah, they were trying to sign a marriage on him for a while.
He has more influence than they do.
He has a bigger influence.
He ran circles around Sanjay Gupta.
Yeah.
And, you know, it's like now they owe him a big apology when these articles come out about, you know, the vaccine possibly causing myocarditis and fucking up girls' periods and women that are 60 years old getting the vaccine and getting a period again after not having a period for.
30 something years, and then you know, women becoming infertile like somebody owes him an apology.
It should be on CNN, yeah.
Like, for someone to be weary of a vaccine that wasn't really tested like that, I mean, don't you don't got to go back too far if you look at black people, you know what I'm saying, with the people in the Tuskegee experiment, you know what I'm saying.
Which one is that?
Uh, isn't it the Tuskegee experiment where Tuskegee was that it where they were giving black people they're supposed to be giving them a vaccine and then they like injected them with smallpox?
I think I heard about this.
You ever heard?
Find it.
The Tuskegee Experiment.
Yeah.
The Syphilis Study at Tuskegee.
Oh, okay.
In 1932, the USPHS, working with a Tuskegee Institute, began.
I lost my place.
Scroll down.
Began a study to record the natural history of syphilis.
It was originally called the Tuskegee Study of Untreated Syphilis in the Negro Male, now referred to as the USPHS Syphilis Study at Tuskegee.
The study initially.
Involved 600 black men, 399 with syphilis, 201 did not have the disease.
Participants informed consent was not collected.
Researchers told the men that they were being treated for bad blood, a local term used to describe several ailments, including syphilis, anemia, and fatigue.
Huh?
It says in exchange for taking part of the study, they received free medical exams.
Free meals and burial insurance.
What?
So it's like, yeah.
So for black people to be wary of a fucking vaccine, like, come on.
Well, black people, the African American population, and specifically in New York, I think, were having the most adverse medical side effects to that vaccine, I think, than anybody.
I mean, bro, I've had that shit a few times.
Have you had COVID yet?
I have never had it.
What?
Never fucking had it.
You've had it?
Yeah, I got it once.
Yeah, you're a dirty boy.
Bro, it's weird.
I've gotten sick.
Like, I've gotten the same symptoms multiple times, and I tested myself, and I always tested negative.
My wife did it.
Why Black People Fear Vaccines 00:13:11
Here's one thing.
The one that was out last year, I took hella tests, bro, because I was sick.
Because I've had like two, three times.
And I took hella tests last year and they all came back negative.
But then I tested positive like a week later for the antibodies.
Strong antibodies.
Like I had just got over.
No shit.
So I probably had it.
I never took the antibody test.
Right, right.
Yeah.
So I was at Rogan Studio, actually.
Oh, really?
He has an on call doctor.
No shit.
You still do that?
What's that?
Is he still doing that test for everyone now?
Probably not.
That was last year.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that could not have been cheap.
But yeah, bro, there's so much fucking sketchy shit that's happened in the history of this country with vaccines and shit.
Even in like Afghanistan, the CIA, there's a story the CIA set up a like a PSYOP vaccination camp for people.
They were telling the Afghanistan people that they were getting vaccines, but they were actually like shooting them up with some bullshit that was fucking them up somehow.
God damn it.
I forget what it was.
You probably find out what exactly it was.
You ever seen the video?
Okay, yeah.
CIA organized a fake vaccination drive to get Osama bin Laden's family's DNA.
Hilarious.
You ever seen?
And I get it, bro.
We were not started on morality in this country.
No.
No.
Not at all.
So I get it.
I get it.
We're a fucked up nation.
That's how we've acquired a lot of the stuff that we've acquired.
We've done some dirty shit.
We've done some sketchy shit to stay number one.
And to stay number one for as long as we stay number one, you do have to be fucked up.
So I totally get it.
Yep.
And along the way, I don't want me or mine being collateral damage.
You know what I'm saying?
You want what being collateral damage?
I don't want me or mine, me or my family being collateral damage.
So, you know, I'm glad that I do have the resources that I have and I can go to doctors that my richer friends use and be like, hey, should we do this?
And they'll be like, well, you know what I'm saying?
Like doctors who are not pushed by big pharma companies.
They're going to be honest with you.
Right.
That are not pushed by big pharma companies.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Hey, can you find a video, one fun thing about Afghanistan, of the American soldiers trying to.
Uh, teach Afghanistanians jumping jacks.
Have y'all ever seen that?
No, oh my, this is why the situation in Kabul happened, bro.
These people are not coordinating.
Like, type that in on YouTube American soldiers teach Afghanistanians, they're trying to teach them jumping jacks, bro.
So, you think they can full screen it?
So, you think they can teach them how to shoot a rifle, bro?
And you wonder why it's over there so full.
Look, they can't, he's kicking the legs and the arms at the same time.
Something so simple.
This guy just can't get it.
He just can't.
Oh, my Lord.
He went one leg.
That is so fucked up, dude.
That guy's got it.
Yeah.
Kind of.
That's the one person you trust with a gun.
Yeah, you're like, all right, we got one.
We got one.
Bro, how are you supposed to teach these niggas how to use an AR?
Bro, they probably grew up using ARs.
They were probably in preschool shooting ARs.
Can't do a jumping jack.
You can't do a jumping jack.
Oh, my God.
Bro, that's why they didn't want us to pull out of Kabul, bro, because they're like, nigga, as soon as y'all pull back, Al Qaeda's back.
Look who the fuck.
Look who holds on to it.
Look who holds on to it.
These motherfuckers can't do a bear cross.
Oh, my God, bro.
What the fuck?
You see the video of them trying to hold on to the plane that was taken off from the runway and they're falling off the fucking plane?
I'm fucked up.
I was laughing at that shit.
Oh, fuck.
That's crazy, they're the same guys who can't do a jumping jack.
They're trying, they think they can hold on to the fucking landing gear.
You know what, bro?
Like, I'm a proud American citizen, you know what I'm saying?
So, when I see people like Britney Griner and all these other people who denounced America, and then you see a situation like that, and it's like, you should be glad that you're in a fucking country where you can even talk bad about the fucking government.
Anywhere else, that shit would not apply, bro.
Like, Qatar over there and all that shit, where they're having the soccer games right now, bro.
People are mysteriously dying for saying bullshit.
You know what I'm saying, bro?
So it's like that one soccer player, is he from Iran?
He's getting murdered, executed, beheaded.
Yeah, when he goes back or whatever.
Yeah, I didn't hear about this.
Yeah, so it's like, bro.
They lost and he said something or he said something and they're like, when he goes back, he's getting fucked up.
He's done.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, he's scared to go back.
I mean, like, remember the Colombian soccer player who scored a goal in his own goal?
No.
Oh, he got beheaded?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So it's like, yeah, like, not only are they not coming to get you.
Like, you wouldn't even have been playing basketball.
Yeah, man.
So it's like when you see situations like that, it just makes me appreciate where I live.
Like, you might hate it or love it.
Yeah.
They just got you.
There's not too many other fucking countries where you can become a self made millionaire.
Right.
My dad's family's from Cuba.
And, dog, there's no way unless you better box, play hella baseball, or be a great ass singer.
Like, bro, what's that dude's name?
Puig?
Puig.
You never heard of Pui, the baseball player?
No, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, bro.
He was basically like on some slave shit.
Really, a person in Texas bought him from Cuba, and then that person in Texas sold him to the Dodgers.
No way, bro, like, bro, these other countries, dog.
So that's why it's like, bro, you're a proud, like, bro, go to North Korea where they show propaganda that they've taken over America, you know, they got to brainwash their citizens constantly, you know what I'm saying, just to give them hope to keep on living.
So it's like, dog.
You should be happy you can say bullshit.
You got free speech.
Did she say negative shit about America before she went over there?
Or was it after she was already in Russia?
Before.
Before.
Yeah, she was kneeling for the anthem and doing all that shit.
She probably changed her tune, though.
I bet you she changed that shit now.
I mean, you've been in a Russian prison.
Her fucking dress, her locks froze off because it was so cold.
Yeah.
So it's like, you should really come back a new person and have a different perspective.
Really should.
On where the fuck you live, that we traded an arms dealer for your gay ass.
One of the biggest, most prolific arms dealers.
The arms dealer that did.
Is this a nickname?
He was like this.
Victor Boot?
Yeah.
No, something.
Yeah, the something of death or something.
The doctor of death.
The dealer of death or something.
All I know is.
What's up?
Look up that guy.
All I know is.
The merchant of death.
The merchant of death.
Oh, yeah.
All I know is Nick Cage played him in Lord of War, and that was a fucking sick movie.
See, the thing about that guy, too, I don't know if he wasn't.
I don't think he was really that bad of a guy.
I think he was just making money off.
He was just like exploiting opportunities to sell.
That's what I'm saying.
That's how you have to become rich over there.
Yeah.
Right.
Like, you, you, there's not, you're not working a nine to five and getting rich.
You can't really legally be rich over there.
Right.
Right in communist countries, dog, there's no you got to do some illegal, yeah, you know what I'm saying.
And if you supply arms to terrorists, then was it eventually charged?
Okay, see, conspiracy to kill Americans that's that's some I think that's some American political thing they tried to use an excuse.
I can, yeah, like you sold guns to somebody, it's a conspiracy charge, yeah.
The conspiracy charge is, I wonder what they kill him when he gets back over there.
He's already doing a podcast, bro.
He's already really.
He's already doing interviews over there.
Like, yeah, he went out.
Yeah, I wondered, like, how does Russia feel about him?
Because I know he's been over here, what, 20 years?
Long time.
Yeah, we've got some shit out of him.
Oh, yeah.
Them CIA torture treatment.
Yeah, you know they fucked with him.
Yeah.
Yeah, he wasn't just sitting in his cell for 20 years.
They interviewed him a couple of days ago, and one of the ladies in Russia was asking him, like, what do you think about America now compared to what you thought before?
He goes, Before I got locked up there, you know, we would look at America like the shiny town on the hill, and now, They have 36 different genders and the places go into hell.
They're like, they don't have the Christian or the Catholic values that we have in Russia.
They don't have, there's nothing binding Americans together.
They're fucking more divided than ever.
There's a million genders and nobody gets along.
He was like, Yeah, it's stupid.
All that gender shit is dumb as fuck.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Rogan talks, me and Rogan have had conversations about how a lot of superpower places get fascinated with gender before their demise.
Like they get fascinated with gender and then they, End in like 100 or 200 years.
Really?
Like, shit gets so good and comfortable that we can't find problems.
Like, we need problems to solve.
But once shit becomes so good, like, we look for more and more problems.
We dig for problems.
We need a, we need, and it's sad to say, we need a 912 the day after 911, when all that mattered was being an American citizen.
You know what I'm saying?
Being an American, bro.
Like, I think I was in the fifth or sixth grade.
Like, and I still remember the unity.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, bro, like, I'm from deep south, like, you know, from down here and raised in Georgia.
Yeah, I was raised in Georgia.
And I remember, man, like, having conversations with grown men about being a proud American.
Like, I would wear an American t shirt and they'd be like, oh, yeah, we had these conversations that I felt like if that would have never happened, we wouldn't have had it.
You know what I mean?
And people were just proud.
Like, people were putting flags in their car.
Yeah, everywhere.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
Like, dog, I feel like some shit like that would make people see what was really real.
And all that other shit ain't real, bro.
Like, fuck your pronouns.
Yeah, it's stupid.
There's bigger problems.
What's that guy's name?
Matt Walsh.
Y'all follow him?
No.
Is he the guy who did the documentary on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What's it called?
Never.
What the fuck is that?
Something about a woman.
Yeah, it's about.
He interviews basically a bunch of people who got like gender reassignment surgery and like regretted it after.
Yeah, bro, because it's like, dog, you over here.
You over here.
And I get it.
It's on both sides.
Like, you got women that are fascinated with BBLs.
Like people in America are just culture vultures.
What's popular right now?
I want to do what's popular.
Yeah, I want to do what's popular right now.
It's a drug.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
So it's like, I get it, man.
Like, you know, like you want to fall into that and be accepted.
It's like there's a comedian, I ain't going to mention no names, and LA.
And the dude started taking hormones.
You know what I'm saying?
What kind of hormones?
The women's hormones.
Oh, shit.
And grew titties or a little bit.
And the facial hair went away, but the dude still got a dick and he still fucks women.
I'm like, 'You're selfish, yeah.
You're not what you're trying to display yourself to be, yeah.
You're just out here doing this because it's what's popular right now.
Bro, and it's also like, it seems like it's the rich kids that are doing it too.
It seems like it's the wealthy people or like the kids of celebrities.
Yeah, that's what happens, man.
You get bored.
They think they're bad.
It's like they think they're better than everyone or like, I'm too good for male or female.
I got to be something different.
Yeah, like Jaden Smith, somebody want to cut his dick off.
Cut it out, stupid motherfucker.
Yeah.
God.
Cut it out.
Yeah.
I love my dick.
What the fuck?
Yeah, bro.
That's crazy.
And Dwayne Wade's kids, you see the shit that came out about Dwayne Wade?
Oh, God.
His mom is.
Not with that shit.
The kid's mom is right.
Really?
Right.
Yeah.
Gabrielle?
No, no, no.
That's not his mom.
Oh, no.
The mom is the real mom.
The real mom.
I just feel like kids should be innocent, bro.
And, you know, I don't want my kids, I got a two year old, eight year old, I don't want them knowing about heterosexual or homosexual sex at their age.
Right.
Yeah, it's not important.
Yeah, you know, like, Let these kids grow up, let them be kids without trying to have them identify as something.
When we were kids, we didn't like, bro, we would have taken a Barbie and played with it.
It didn't mean that I wanted to be a girl, it was just I was a kid, I don't know any better, right?
Yeah, you know what I mean?
Like, it's just like I used to try to make my cousins' Barbies, yeah, put one Barbie on top of the other, yeah, yeah, bro.
It's crazy because, like, I mean, it's just incentivized by what I mean, politics and money mainly, right?
Because now there's like all these hormone clinics that are all over the country that are.
Charging all this money, making all this money, trying to promote it, making all this money.
And then, what's the end goal though?
So, move the base, if you move the base like towards it, it won't tip.
Criminal Mindset In LA 00:09:10
Okay.
Yeah.
But what's the end goal?
I don't think there is an end goal, bro.
I don't think they've thought it through.
Yeah.
Because I've heard these fucking binary or whatever the fuck they are people call women that give birth breeders and call them chest feeders.
You know, I have heard that.
I bounce in between LA and Austin.
So, I get it all.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, LA, bro, that's.
Like Austin's liberal, but it's not LA liberal.
Like, they're still conservatives that drive lifted trucks.
They say they're liberal, but it's like, bro, you have not been to LA.
You motherfuckers drive lifted trucks and eat meat.
Yeah.
These motherfucking liberals in LA have.
They're the real deal.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They don't want to work.
They want.
They're lazy.
You know what I'm saying?
It's like all these offended.
What are you offended by?
Everything.
Like, dog, that's why you suicidal in the press right now because your ass can't take a good verbal ass kicking.
The people in LA, like, a majority of people, Of in LA, like the mystique of LA is show business, right?
So, people that live there that are entwined in show business, they want to like follow, they want to stay in line with what's acceptable in show business.
And I think the main that is being extremely liberal and far left and being like socially conscious of everybody and don't hurt animals.
That's just changing, it's slowly changing.
Um, and I think in the next five years, yeah, like and then also like.
I hate to reference Rogan, but he's one of the most knowledgeable people I know.
And he's like, these people are just a small group.
You know, I travel America for a living, and my comedy is pretty right, you know, on the right side of the political scale.
And it's a very small group of people, bro.
It is like we look at LA and New York, you know what I'm saying?
And that is a very small percentage of the population because there's a lot of.
Conservatives in Southern California, like the whole Orange County, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, like San Diego.
San Diego, Orange County in general, like Riverside, all that shit, bro, are people who want to tote their guns and they're kind of like libertarians.
But you have these few fat vegans in LA with purple hair that don't want to work and talk about, you know what I'm saying, systemic racism.
And it's like, bitch, don't be offended for me.
Yeah.
You're not oppressed.
No, bitch.
The fuck?
White people have been great to me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I am not oppressed.
I cannot name a single instance where a white person has kept me from doing anything I wanted to achieve.
If anything, it's been a people that share the same skin complex as me that have robbed me, put guns to me, put knives to me, and taken my shit.
I've never been robbed by a white person.
Sorry to disappoint you.
Yeah.
Yeah, then they're like, well, what about this?
What about that?
There's something.
Oh, my God, man.
Sorry to disappoint you.
I've never been robbed by a white person.
I am so sorry, sweetheart.
Never.
I mean, I've probably been robbed on the, you know, the fucking agent and management and lawyer side.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But that's a different type of robbery.
You know what I'm saying?
That's subtle.
That's subtle.
At least it's not blatant.
It's not armed robbery.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
My life's not in danger.
You know what I'm saying, bro?
Like, it's, it's, it's.
What isn't, aren't they getting a new, isn't LA getting a new mayor?
Karen Bass.
Karen Bass.
Yeah.
I heard, I heard, I forget who I was listening to talk about it.
Maybe it was Tim Dellon.
He was talking about how they, Are shuttling all the homeless people out of downtown LA just so they can make like her inauguration look good.
Like, because they're doing like a big ceremony for Karen Bass to be the new mayor.
And there's, I guess, tons of homeless people in that area.
Oh, we got like 120,000.
So they're getting buses and they're moving them all out just so they can.
They put them in hotels and shit.
Oh, my God.
Wow.
Yeah.
Bro, how crazy is that?
Our city.
Oh, my God.
Oh, there it is.
With LA swearing in the new mayor, crews work to move homeless encampments.
Bro, let me tell you something.
Our city has not been right.
Since Mayor Villarigosa.
Which one was that?
How long was that?
He was a criminal, bro.
He was about eight, nine years ago.
Like when I first moved to LA, it was, bro, like homeless people were centralized to one area.
You know what I'm saying?
They used to, I used to live downtown, bro.
They would literally in the morning, like 6 a.m., go out there with fucking water hoses and hose them down.
You know what I'm saying?
Like get the fuck up out of here, bitch.
Like, and that's what people don't understand, bro.
You're talking about LA County.
That's a place that holds like 13 million people.
Right.
Some states don't have that population.
Yeah.
Right.
You can't be this righteous, soft, you know, get run over.
Mayor Vera Ragosa was a gangster.
There was a rumor about him taking guns to his meetings.
And, you know, he just got shit done, bro.
Like, you kind of got to be a criminal, dog.
You kind of got to have a criminal mindset.
It's like Gotham City.
Like, a righteous motherfucker can't go to Gotham City and make it right.
No, you gotta have police that do shakedowns.
Yeah, you gotta do some shit.
Yeah, you gotta kind of beat the criminal's ass a little bit so that they know, like, motherfucker, these my shit.
Yeah, you're not gonna do this without repercussions.
Like, bro, like, in LA right now, that's why we got all those massive theft rings where it's like 20 people were breaking to Neiman's and still like $15,000 worth of shit because the minimum for a felony is like $1,500 now.
So if 20 of us go, we can get $20,000 worth of shit and nobody gets charged with a felony.
And we'll be out to go home for dinner.
That's fucking wild, bro.
You got to start, you got to, like, you got to start about racially profiling that.
Like, you can't, that's not a city.
Type it in on your computer, bro.
How much orange robbery and crimes have increased in LA over the past like two, three years?
Yeah, it's crazy, right?
I, my apartment, look at this shit, bro.
Well, that's Alabama.
That's North California.
It's like a guy talking over it.
But also, there you go.
One out of 48 shoplifters get caught, he said.
And they're just fucking, they're just filling up their bags at Walmart.
No regard.
Why do you?
I mean, the people that are in charge of LA and in California, the people like the politicians, do they think they're doing the right thing?
It started a few years ago when we had this one city councilwoman.
I can't remember her name.
I think she was a lesbian.
And it got to the point where they had to stop touching homeless people's tents because it was considered their property, even if they set up on a fucking sidewalk.
Right.
And then they had this place, Echo Park.
Where you know, families go, there's a lake, you can walk around the lake.
And they had a lot of homeless people, and these homeless people were doing like fucked up shit with kids and shit present, jacking off, fucking smoking, shooting up.
And all these fucking libs and vegetarians were like, No, you can't kick them out the park, bitch, bring them to your house.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, yeah, they don't hang out with your kids over there.
Like, come on, you don't have kids, you don't desire to have fucking kids because you think for some reason that you were born asexually, so you don't even want to have kids, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, so it's like, Get the fuck out of here.
I take my kids to public parks to run around, and I'm a licensed gun carrier in the state of California, and I will kill a motherfucker if they do some bullshit.
I'm going to protect my kids at all costs, and I got money for a lawyer.
So it's like most people in LA are scared.
Most people in LA are very terrified.
And what's with the, there's also like a push to not have kids with people like super far left.
I know like there was a lecture done at some university or whatever, and one of the, I forget where one of the big universities and like the professor was talking about growing up and have like overpopulation on the planet and shit.
And she was like, well, you know, some people it's okay to have kids, but it's probably the more responsible thing to not reproduce.
They're dumb, bro.
It's like a weird thing that's happening with young people now.
They want to like prioritize their career and their money before like that.
I want to be rich before I ever have kids.
Like make sure my career is right.
What's the point of getting rich if you don't got children?
Leave it to what?
A dog?
Leave your money to a dog?
A cat?
Yeah.
Some fucking foundation that don't really give a fuck about you and they'll put a plaque on this million dollar money.
They'll stick it in their pocket anyway.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The fucking CEO of a homeless shelter walking around making a $308,000 a year salary because of your dumbass donations, bitch.
Leaving Money To Foundations 00:15:14
Yeah.
Right.
The pastor flying in his own private jet.
But like you can see the argument though when you look at downtown LA and you see all the fucking prostitutes and crackheads.
That probably had no father.
They probably grew up in a circle of poverty and drug abuse and fucking, who knows, their uncle probably died.
That comes to accountability.
That comes to accountability, bro.
If they really force parents to be parents, parents would be parents.
Like, dog, I come from fucked up circumstances.
And my mom could have easily abandoned me.
You know what I'm saying?
I was raised by my grandparents.
And she could have easily abandoned me, and I could have easily chosen to go left when I chose to go right because I always knew, even when we lived in the hood, that I wanted better for myself.
You know what I'm saying?
And yeah, it's up.
What do you see?
What are your parents instilling you?
And what do you see your parents doing?
Did you know from a really young age that you were like destined, you wanted to do something more with your life?
Yeah, when I was like eight years old, I told my mom I was going to be like Will Smith, which I hate now because he slapped Chris Rock.
And actually, I just had Chris Rock.
I just had dinner with Chris Rock like a month ago, bro.
No way.
Yeah, it was fun.
What was it?
Yeah, what was that like in the comedy world?
Like, how did that rock?
So that's the thoughts of everybody and stuff.
Like, I've seen Chris Rock multiple times.
Like, when I used to be a door guy at the comedy store before then, yeah.
And this is my first time being like in an intimate setting.
Like, we were at this, they call so Rogan, Chris Rock was in Austin performing at the Moody Center.
And Rogan rented a restaurant for us.
And Chris Rock was actually right here.
And Rogan was right there.
His writer was right here.
His sound guy was right there.
William Montgomery is right there.
And he has a crew of like 15 people.
So, you're all in this.
Chris does, yeah.
He got a big crew, yeah.
You know, a fucking arena act, yeah.
So, I'm sitting next to Chris Rock.
From the time I meet him, he's not the Chris Rock you see on stage.
You know what I'm saying?
He's not this loud, boisterous person.
And he's just so small and so fragile, older guy.
And, you know, Will Smith, what, 6'3, 6'4?
Yeah.
Yeah, he's a big guy.
Big guy.
You know, you can obviously tell he's still physically active, loves weights and does stuff.
And Chris is small, you know, skinny fingers.
And it's like, I felt so bad for him.
And I'm like, how could Will Smith slap this guy?
And I grew up a very big fan of Fresh Prince, summer, summertime with him and Jazzy Joe.
And I'm like, how could Will Smith slap?
I would feel like such a bitch ass motherfucker slapping someone like Chris Rock.
Like, how did he do this?
Right.
Bro, like Will Smith, you have a sketch or a sketch, sketch in one of the episodes of Fresh Prince where you wanted to be a stand up comedian.
So you get jokes.
This man did not.
The joke was not that bad, right?
And I think he did it to a person he knew he can get away with it.
Definitely, I don't think he would have slapped Steve Harvey.
No, yeah, it's weird, bro.
It's a, I wonder, Chris Rock did the same thing.
He Chris Rock did the right thing, excuse me.
He did the right thing, like on a setting like that, the Oscars, like bro, like me, it's a different story, right?
Bro, first of all, Will Smith wouldn't have came on stage with me because, like, bro, like.
But I'm, you know, like I was born in the hood.
Then when I became a teenager, we lived in the suburbs.
But I have like those hood, like, you know, when I be on dates and shit, girls be like, why are you so paranoid?
I'd be like, girl, you got to watch your surroundings.
And, you know, so it's like I got those instincts still.
And I look at body language.
And, like, if you're walking towards me, I'm like, hello, what you doing, bro?
You know, I'm putting up, like, what you doing?
Yeah.
Why are you walking towards me like that?
You, like, I said a joke about your wife.
Like, I'm already knowing, like, this dude ain't coming up here to shake my hand.
Right, you know what I'm saying?
Like, I'm gonna push you off.
Like, what you doing, bro?
Yeah, kick you, kick you.
Like, I'm gonna figure, like, we would have been tussling.
He walked up there kind of like, he didn't walk up there very hostile looking.
He kind of walked up casual and then he kind of turned the other way.
It don't matter, and then he just came at him.
It don't, yeah, but what are you doing walking up?
Will Smith is coming up here, yeah, like, no, why Will Smith coming up here?
I just said a joke about your wife, yeah, yeah.
Didn't Jada used to date like Tupac or something, yeah, supposedly?
She dated Tupac, yeah, because they did that movie together.
There was supposed to be a relationship back there.
Can you pull that up?
There's a letter that Willow wrote Tupac saying, Tupac, can you come back?
My mom misses you.
What?
See if you can pull that up.
Willow's letter to Tupac.
Wait, wait, wait.
What's the headline?
Yeah, find a better home and get a drink real quick.
So it's like if Will Smith has to live in this image of Tupac, then it can be a very fucked up situation.
Do you think it was like he looked at Jada, she gave him that look, and he was like, fuck, I gotta.
Do you think it was like the look?
Absolutely.
Yeah, right?
Yeah, she gave him that look.
Yeah.
They're sparkling or still?
No, it's just regular.
You want sparkling?
I don't think I have any sparkling.
It's cool.
I think she gave him that look.
Yeah, she definitely did.
Yeah.
Everybody who dates women knows that a woman has a certain.
Is this a letter?
Dear Tupac, I know you are alive someplace.
I think that my mommy really misses you.
Can you please come back?
Can you come back so many times?
So mommy and me can be happy.
I wish you were here.
I love, I really do love.
Willow.
Willow.
So, how much does this woman talk about Tupac where you're right?
Where your daughter knows something like that, and that's at a young age.
That's true.
You can see that letter, bro.
You think Tupac's still alive?
Could be his auntie down in Cuba.
Wasn't his mom like a Black Panther?
His mom was a Black Panther, and she was involved in some conspiracy where there was like they were all there was like a what did they do that like shot up a grocery store?
There was something I can't remember, and there was like a there was a fucking so.
There was a guy that was in the Black Panthers.
I think it was a white guy.
I could be wrong, but he was working with them for years, and he basically convinced them all to plot some sort of scheme to either rob or shoot up a grocery store or a retail store.
And that guy who convinced them all to do it, because they went on trial for it, that guy ended up being a CIA agent or an FBI agent.
Yeah, I forced him into it.
Yeah, I mean, there's some good interviews I can send you, bro.
Do you watch Vlad TV?
No.
You should watch those interviews.
I've seen them.
They're hard to watch, bro.
They're weird.
They're just like.
Just only watch the ones where he gets like.
Don't watch the entertainers.
Watch the people you don't really know.
Like, he has this guy called.
He's a big fan of Vlad TV.
Yeah, I can't.
I've been watching him since a long time ago.
Mob James.
You know what a Mob James interview?
Yeah, that sounds really familiar.
So, Mob James used to be Suge Knight Security.
Oh, yeah.
Tupac.
Basically, he was a theatrical lesbian who ended up around gangbangers and should never have had that persona.
Yeah.
He went to like arts dance school in New York.
That's where him and Jada met.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There were interviews of him when he was like in high school where he was like talking about stuff and like talking about culture and he like sounded really smart and articulate.
I mean, you could hear it.
He was different.
You could hear it in his music.
Oh, for sure.
And then he was a backup dancer for Digital Underground.
Before he became a rapper, the Humpty Dance.
The Humpty Hump.
He was a backup dancer.
Good, baby.
Do the Humpty Hump.
Are you big into conspiracies?
Or do you not pay attention to them?
I like them.
You like them?
I just like different approaches to stuff.
So it's like, let me hear your opinion on this.
You know what I'm saying?
I like different approaches to shit.
What's your favorite conspiracy theory?
The one that made me laugh.
What's your favorite?
One that made me laugh was that COVID was made by 5G.
How did that one go?
Yeah, tell me more.
I didn't hear it.
Oh, bro.
It was black folks.
They're like 5G makes COVID.
They're putting up all these 5G towels, and that's why we got COVID right now.
And the towers are somehow like spraying COVID out of them.
I'd be feeling so bad to be black because the shit they be saying.
I'm like, so what did 4G make?
Yeah.
If 5G made COVID, what did 4G make?
HIV?
Sometimes I'd be mad at my people, though.
I'd be like, what the fuck are you saying?
Like Kanye?
Yeah, how do you feel about Kanye right now?
Kanye's wild.
As a person that, you know, You know, all of us probably battle mental health issues.
I can recognize a manic episode, yeah, definitely.
You could see the difference between some of his interviews when he's like normal, I don't want to use the word normal, but it's just regular, and then it's like sometimes he's just going off.
Go look at his Rogan interview, yeah, then go look at his uh Drink Champs interview, yeah, his Rogue interview.
I really liked actually.
And I saw that clip with Rogan when he was like, You got to approach Kanye like Lex did, that guy Lex.
I don't know if you guys saw that interview, yeah, I watched that one, and it was like Lex didn't play no games, no.
And he was like, You can't just call them Jews.
He's like, You want to call them out?
You got to call them by their full name.
Call them by their name.
And then you could tell he was like stumped.
He was like, All right, but if I do it, will you help me?
He doesn't.
The problem with Kanye, and I used to have a friend who's worked for Kanye, and Kanye only likes yes men around him.
So it's like any stupid, and I'm a big Kanye fan.
I still wear his shoes, you know.
Yeah.
And it's like any stupid idea he comes up with, you have these yes men that support it.
You don't have anybody to challenge you, you don't have anybody to be like, Hey, yeah, what the are you doing?
You're about to lose your legacy.
He needs a real person by his side, yeah, and everybody needs that.
And for me, that's my family, you know what I'm saying, or the girls that I date.
Like, I date real women, I date women that are so far away from entertainment, yeah, yeah.
I don't want you to even know who I am, yeah.
You don't watch YouTube, good, yeah.
I never understood how some people like to have like.
Girlfriends or wives that are in the same business that they're in, or do the same shit that they're in.
I'm the complete opposite.
I could never stand being around somebody like myself.
Yeah, exactly.
But yeah, bro, did you watch Ari's special, The Jew Special?
Bro, that shit was so fucking funny, bro.
Ari's a funny guy.
I just did his podcast like two weeks ago.
He was talking about Kanye and he was like, Well, we are annoying.
Funny dude.
Yeah, he is fucking hilarious, man.
Whenever he comes to Tampa, I'll hook you up.
Whenever he comes this way, I'll hook you up.
Yeah, yeah, bro.
I'd love to see him in Tampa.
That's my guy, bro.
So you were on his podcast?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was on his podcast.
It just released this week.
Oh, really?
Is that where he lives?
He lives in Austin, too?
No, he lives in New York.
Oh, in New York.
I don't think Ari will ever move out of New York.
No.
Yeah, I don't think he will.
No.
Oh, since I've been on this podcast, guess who I started working with?
Who?
Louis C.K.
Oh, yeah.
No shit.
Fans of all times, bro.
What's that like, bro?
It's like going to Harvard for comedy.
Yeah.
Just listen to him talk, and then when he critiques your jokes, you should really listen.
Yeah, there's a picture somewhere on my Instagram, my Twitter.
I don't know if you can pull it up.
Yeah, he can.
Yeah, on my Instagram, there's a picture of me and Louis CK.
But uh, bro, um, it's dope, it was dope.
Yeah, I mean, he might call me on my own tour now, but uh, he could possibly call me back to work with him.
Yeah, yeah, all the way down.
I think when I was on your podcast, I had like 30,000 followers.
I gained like 50,000 in two years.
That's crazy, man.
That's so cool.
Yeah, keep going down.
So, show more posts from David Lucas.
Yeah, bro, you and I feel like.
Oh, there's you and Chris Rock.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's when I had dinner with him.
That's my boy Tony, right?
Kill Tony microphone.
That's me and Frank Mirror.
Y'all know Frank Mirror?
No.
UFC fighter?
No, no.
You got to be logged in.
Anyways.
Oh, you got to be logged in?
Or go on my Twitter.
It's on my Twitter, too.
I was going to say, like, you and.
I feel like funny David Lucas.
You and I was talking about like that natural like talent to be funny where you're it doesn't seem like you're trying that hard.
I feel like Tony has that same thing.
Tony's a beast, bro.
He's he's just like he goes up there.
He seems like he is like low energy.
He's just like we saw him in Tampa.
Yeah, I was just telling him.
We saw him at the improv.
That was funny as shit.
But like just the way he talks and just like that relaxed like I don't know.
Who's that?
Shane?
Shane's super funny.
Type in David Lucas and Louis CK.
It should pop up.
He's coming to Tampa soon, actually, I think.
Oh, really?
Louis?
No, Shane.
Oh.
I could probably hook that up.
There it is.
There you go.
How crazy is it that he's Mexican?
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
Like Canelo Elroy.
Oh, yeah.
He told me his story, but I don't want to misquote it.
He's a great guy.
That's cool as hell.
Yeah, it's got to be amazing.
Fucking.
Working with him.
Yeah, man.
It's.
Scoot that way a little bit.
It's amazing work.
It's amazing, bro.
You know, like we have each other's numbers.
We're on a first name basis.
I've done hella shows with him.
He's critiqued my comedy.
He thinks I'm a genius.
And I'm like, what the fuck, bro?
How?
You smell this before?
Yeah.
I'm a little tipsy.
Yeah.
Oh, let me get whiffed.
That's like cocaine, nigga.
Share the love.
Share the love.
We have to hoard in it.
That's community.
Community sauce.
That shit burns.
Oh, you got to get closer than that, baby.
Put it in there, man.
Put it in there.
Right?
God damn.
As close as you can get to legally, man.
Oh, God.
And that's an old one.
That's an old one.
Profit Before Family 00:07:35
Oh, yeah.
You should smell it when you bust it out.
When you get a fresh one?
First one, you can smell it before you peel the wrapper.
That shit will make your eyes water.
Me too.
Me too.
Damn.
If you see the video, that stuff will save lives right there, man.
It will.
Oh, my God.
If you overdose on fentanyl, you can smell that.
But I think about long drives.
Sometimes you're falling asleep.
You take a whiff of that.
You're back.
You're on the road again.
Oh, yeah.
Absolutely.
Yeah, it burns.
Truckers.
It's like some shitty cocaine.
When you do some really shitty cocaine and it burns really bad, it's like the same shit.
Yeah, fuck that.
Nah, bro, that's that power.
You got that power over me.
My life.
Yeah, eyes watering.
My eyes hurt.
It's like we've been gagging on the dick.
Starting over.
Yeah, bro.
Oh, man.
Weren't you, so going back to your childhood, you were, how early was it that you started like performing, doing comedy?
Like, how young were you?
Like 16, 17.
Really?
In Georgia?
Yeah.
That's real.
Hosting talent shows at the high school.
So cool.
Performing at poetry lounges.
Like, By the age of 15, 16, I knew either my future was NFL or entertainment.
Really?
Did you play football too?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What position did you play?
DC.
Defensive tackle?
Yeah, one technique.
Run somebody over.
Yeah, bro.
I'm still pretty strong.
I'm still a bull.
You know what's crazy?
I had an opportunity to go to UCF.
I wish I would have gone.
Really?
Yeah.
I applied to go to UCF.
I didn't get in.
Damn, dog.
My bad.
They offered it to you.
I actually tried and failed.
Football?
No, no, no.
I wanted to go to film school there.
They had like the best film school, like one of the best film schools in the country.
Shit, I went to UCLA, dog.
Yeah, them and UCF are like the two biggest.
Yeah, you should have like fucked Francis for a copula's daughter.
Yeah.
I had the dude from the guy, the dude who, you know, ever heard of the Blair Witch Project?
Of course.
The guy who made that, he wrote me a letter of recommendation even to get in there because he's like one of their most successful alumni.
They still didn't let me in.
Yeah, but that's not like a, you know what I'm saying?
It wasn't Spielberg.
That's not like a Blair Witch Project.
No, but if you look at it money wise, like they made the most, they were the most profitable.
Right.
And it was innovative.
They were the first people, they were like, Not necessarily.
POV style, right?
Yeah, absolutely.
The film, like the cinematography wasn't anything special, right?
It was all fucking the actors with shitty cameras.
But the idea of found footage and making it the marketing behind it, it was the first time it's ever been done.
I remember that being in elementary school, bro.
I'm like, oh.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, yeah.
It's the first movie.
It was the first movie where you would go to the theater thinking it was real shit.
It could have been real, yeah.
You didn't, people didn't know it was fake.
Yeah, it cost them 35 grand to make the whole thing.
What does that say?
249 million globally.
And that was years ago.
It was a year ago.
Damn, that's like 300 million now.
That's like crazy profit, bro.
What does that guy do now?
I think he works for some company in Europe now.
He made a bunch of horror flicks after that, but they never really hit the Blair Witch.
But they've had multiple Blair Witches.
Were those?
Yeah, there was a couple of them.
No, no.
So what they did after the first one, they sold it.
They sold the franchise to Lionsgate.
They bought the rights to Blair Wish, and then they ended up like fucking greedy.
Why don't you just retire?
Why are you still working?
You make a lick, like a two, a quarter of a billion dollar lick off a hundred dollars lick off 35 grand.
35 grand.
How crazy is that?
They were still in college when they made it.
I mean, bro, we could legit right now film a movie on our iPhones.
Yeah, that's way better quality.
We could film a movie on our iPhone, yes, have it, you know, professionally edited.
Yeah, and I mean, Ari Shafir shoots his podcast on iPhone.
I saw that.
I saw that.
So, I mean, that's crazy, bro.
That's a lot of work.
We would have to, you know, aim it towards the titty boppers, you know, the teeny boppers, the high schoolers.
But we can make a lot of money.
What do you think it is about the whole podcast thing blowing up?
That, like, it seems like, I don't know if we talked about it before, but it seems like the whole comedy community and the podcasting community are super entwined.
And, like, all of the, like, everyone in the comedy scene, they all have podcasts and they all go on each other's podcasts.
How does the podcast shit help comedy?
Well, I mean, bro, podcasts for a comedian is kind of like having a business card.
People fall in love with your voice, they fall in love with your essence, they fall in love with who you are.
They don't, they could almost care less about your jokes.
So they just want to hear you talk, even if you're rambling.
That's why ASMR is popular.
They fall in love with these people's sounds.
You know what I'm saying?
So it's like you have to.
And then, I mean, it's so profitable, bro.
You do YouTube, you know how much it's made, bro.
Yeah, no, I know, but still.
I'll turn my YouTube into a six figure a year business.
Before it got so big, though, like every.
It started with comedians, I feel like, didn't it?
Didn't it just start with like true comedians doing podcasts before they made money?
If anybody I can say is the podcast king, I say it's Rogan and Red Band.
You know, back when they were doing podcasts before it was even popular.
You know what I'm saying?
When people were like, what the fuck is this?
But does it help you when you do podcasts?
Even though like you probably don't plan out podcasts, you probably just kind of like talk shit.
But does it help you with your comedy and like, does it help you with.
Your thinking process and your creative process when you do podcasts, like, oh, we were talking about something good, maybe you know, something we talked about during that podcast.
I can expand on that.
I mean, comedians can just talk, yeah, we could talk to what you do, we could talk for a long time.
So, uh, I mean, you're you're you know, a new fan is a new fan, one new person who can buy merch or buy tickets.
I love you, yeah, you know what I'm saying.
You, I might reach you know, every podcast is a new audience, especially.
Especially if you go on a podcast, it's not a comedy podcast.
Yeah.
Because now I get to see real life people who might not watch comedy.
Right.
And now they're like, oh, I got to go see this guy.
Yeah.
I got to go see this guy at a comedy show.
Right.
So, yeah, I love doing podcasts.
You know, I like to talk.
And I definitely like podcasts when it's not comedians because I don't want to be funny.
Yeah.
I got to match your fucking funny.
You know what I'm saying?
I don't want to do that shit.
Yeah.
So, yeah, it's fun.
I really liked your podcast with Duncan.
That was funny as shit.
Damn, bro.
We found that a while ago.
Yeah.
You saw that?
I listened to it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We found that in his.
It was good.
He's an interesting dude, man.
Duncan was crazy.
He's an interesting motherfucker.
He is, bro.
Duncan's out of his fucking mind, bro.
He was talking about, he got contacted by like DARPA for doing some fucking conspiracy podcasts.
He said after he did a podcast with Joe talking about conspiracy theories or whatever.
What's DARPA?
DARPA is like, I forget what it stands for, but they're like basically the CIA.
It's like the defense.
Look up what DARPA means.
Duncan's DARPA Conspiracy Story 00:02:26
I kind of remember it, but I don't remember it.
He's a Buddhist too, right?
I think so.
Advanced research projects, agents.
Yeah, they reached out to him after he did a podcast talking about conspiracy theories or something.
I thought he talked about that on your podcast, maybe.
He said it briefly.
But I'm saying that podcast was so long.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've had so much other information come to my head since then.
I remember it, but that was so long ago.
That was before your podcast.
Oh, really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think so.
When did you become Buddhist?
It's more of a mindset, bro.
It's just like, you know, if you think about the future, you're anxious.
If you think about the past, you're depressed.
So it's like, come live in the now.
I got Buddha tatted on my hand to remind me, like, just to live in the now.
You know what I'm saying?
So for me, it's more of a mindset, spirituality.
I treat you how I want to be treated and just have respect for all living things.
What got you interested in it?
How'd you discover it?
So there was a point in my life where I was not sure about spirituality.
And not sure about what was what.
And, you know, like I feel like I look at God every time I look in the mirror.
I feel like I'm an expression of God.
And Buddhism just kind of aligned with my values at that time in my life.
You know what I'm saying?
So it's like, I like this.
And it's like, okay, it's metaphorically speaking.
Like when Buddha was born, everywhere he stepped, lotus flowers bloomed.
And it's like, okay, do I believe that?
Kind of like, you know, the Jesus stuff, you know?
So it's like it aligned with me.
Yeah, Buddhism.
I think Buddhism is the one religion where they actually don't believe in like a deity or a god, which I think is interesting.
I mean, bro, I feel like our religions are the same.
Like, it's based on morality.
It's based on faith.
And, you know, a lot of people, you know, because I consider myself a Republican or conservative, and they're like, oh, you're Republican or conservative when you don't believe in Jesus.
It's like, I do believe in Jesus.
I respect the story.
You know what I'm saying?
A lot of religious deities have the same story.
You know, there's Krishna.
It has like 65 different versions of Jesus.
Krishna, Serapis Bay, Amin Ra.
You know, if you do your research, and it's like, can we discredit all those?
How can we discredit anybody who's living off of the same thing you're living off of, which is faith?
Horseshoe Theory Explained 00:08:32
Yeah.
So it's like, I can't down this man because he believes in what he believes in.
Yeah.
As long as he's not trying to push it on other people.
That's my whole thing.
I'm not trying to convert you.
Right.
You know, it's not like Scientology.
I believe in God.
I believe in Jesus.
I believe in Muhammad.
I believe in all of it.
So it's like, that's just my level.
The weird thing about the like part of Ari, especially talks about like Judaism, Jews, they only believe in one version of the story, like the original version of the Bible.
Yeah.
But there's like 65 different versions of Christianity, like Southern Baptist, Baptist, fucking Episcopal.
Yeah, there's so many different fucking weird versions of it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I try not to think too much of that.
I just try to stay funny.
Yeah.
Think about being funny and not really wrap my mind in that too much because we don't know.
We just don't know.
And how I feel about it, there's one mountaintop.
However, you get there is your choice.
You may choose the harder way, you might choose the easier way, but we're all going to get there.
Have you ever heard of?
I was listening to this podcast, I've talked about it before, but I think it's called the IDG podcast.
It's like the super, not super, but pretty right wing podcast where this girl, I think she's a comedian, but she also does fitness.
And she was talking about horseshoe theory with Baptists.
And she compares Baptists to bootleggers.
So you know how in some towns where you can't serve alcohol, you can't sell alcohol on Sundays?
In Texas, there's towns in Texas that you can't serve alcohol.
You can't buy hard liquor on Sunday in Texas.
Connecticut was like that too.
Really?
You can buy like beer and wine, but you can't buy it.
In all of Texas?
Well, in Austin, it might be all of Texas.
Wow, I didn't fucking know that.
I remember moving to Connecticut and I went to buy beer on like a Sunday or liquor or something.
And they were like, you can't buy it today.
And I was like, what?
That's fucking crazy.
Coming from Florida?
Crazy.
You could buy it till 3 a.m.
I was in Portland, bro.
And like, I remember they shut the liquor stores down like at 9.
I'm like, Bitch, crack is legal here.
Yeah, right.
How the fuck can you tell me I can't get a fucking bottle of tequila?
That's insane.
Yeah, but that's weird that it's still a thing, though.
And she was, anyways, back to what I was talking about the horseshoe theory.
If you look at the Baptists and the bootlegger, like the idea of horseshoe theory is that there's two ends of a continuum, like too far, like left and right wing, like the farthest version of left compared to the farthest version of right.
And instead of it being just like a continuum that goes forever, it's more of like a horseshoe that bends and the two extremes are closer together, like a horseshoe is.
And she compared a Baptist to a bootlegger.
Like, what does alcohol being banned on Sunday, how does that benefit a bootlegger?
Because you can't buy it on Sunday, so they can stock up on all the booze and they can sell it for a profit on Sunday.
Yeah.
I know people in Texas who sell.
Alcohol really marked up on Sundays.
And then she goes, So now look at a Baptist.
They don't want alcohol to be sold on Sundays for moral reasons, for religious reasons.
So she compares, she goes, now look at extreme leftists and the KKK.
What do they both want?
They both want segregation.
Because she was comparing, there was like a school in Colorado.
It's great, bro.
You got to find it.
Look up like the, if you just type in Horseshoe Theory IDG podcast, she explains it great.
There's a school in Colorado who had, Play nights on their playground.
It was children of color only play night.
See, that's.
And it's segregation.
And they were like, and they interviewed the elementary school about it.
Like, why did you guys do this?
We're like, we wanted to be inclusive to the families of color.
And we wanted no white children to be there because we wanted it to be like the parents of color so they could interact better and be more open with each other.
That's some shit they just did at.
I was reading an article about some college where, uh, can I get another one?
Yeah, yeah, where, um, they're doing like the premiere of the new Black Panther, and like no white kids were invited.
Like, what the right?
Yeah, it's a weird idea, right?
It's like I can see what they're trying to do, but it don't really make sense at all.
Thank you, bro.
I'll find it on my phone, I'll just text it to you.
Yeah, text it to me.
Yeah, but you heard what I was saying about that college where they had the premiere of Black Panther and they didn't want any white kids there.
No.
Stupid shit, man.
I never heard about that.
What college was that?
Probably some college with not a lot of money.
But it's like, bro, once motherfuckers understand that we are all humans, that's it.
Can you find a skeletal remain and know if they were black or white?
A skeleton?
I mean, nothing.
Can you find a skeletal remain?
And know if they were black or white or Mexican outside of size, yeah.
I don't think so, probably not.
That's what I'm saying, man.
Don't fucking.
I'm gonna find this video, it's fucking worth it.
The fuck do it matter for?
I look at you as a human, yeah.
At the end of the day, bro, like racism came from, bro, YouTube fucking like shadow banded or something because I can't fucking find it, probably.
But racism came from a.
Competition of resources.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, just some sort of position of power over somebody.
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
Apocalypso?
Yeah.
I saw that in a movie theater when I was a kid, bro.
I'll never forget that.
That movie was, I remember watching that movie in the movie theater.
I didn't know what it was about, even.
I went with this girl.
It was crazy.
What a meaning, deep, meaningful movie and shit.
People of their same color came and did that shit to them.
Yeah.
That dude's fucked.
Is your biggest enemy really somebody with a different skin complexion?
I don't think so.
Yeah.
Especially in the black community.
Who's likely, and it's just like statistically, who's likely to end your existence as a black person?
Another black person.
Who's likely to rob you?
Who's likely to steal from you?
And that's why I just don't get caught up in that shit.
Yeah.
Find, just Google, uh, Sorry, I'm like on a different wavelength right now.
Google that the school in Colorado.
That movie was sick.
School in Colorado that had like play night for children of color only.
Bro, I remember hearing this.
I wouldn't even take my daughter there.
And I hate Colorado because of that.
You hate Colorado?
The altitude, bro.
Oh, yeah.
I got altitude sickness there.
Me too, bro.
Really?
What about the people that did take their kids there that night?
What type of people are they?
Denver Elementary School is facing backlash for planning a Families of Color playground.
Read the fucking sign.
How crazy is that?
You put that.
These are the same.
What guy put those letters up there on that sign?
These are the same people that would take their kids to a drag brunch.
A drag brunch.
You didn't see that?
I remember that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He knows.
Yeah.
He came out.
They brought like drag queens to the school for the kids or some shit.
Oh, my God, bro.
That's fucking insane.
I would not show up to that shit.
What fucking school is that, man?
My daughter loves all people of color.
Both of my daughters, people of all colors.
Where are your daughters living in LA?
Yeah.
Activist Pimps, Moms Blast School Board for promoting family friendly Halloween drag show.
Yeah, bro.
I think that I just think the pendulum is going to swing on this wacky shit, man.
I think it's just going to swing back and kind of get normal.
Trump Versus Desantis Crowd 00:13:24
You saw that fucking non binary person that worked for Biden that's yes, still in suitcases.
Oh my god, bro.
That was so fucking.
That person is a very weird looking person.
That motherfucker at first said it was an accident, then he was on.
Then did it again.
Yeah, yeah, then did it again.
So they're just hiring people because they're like non binary or because they were dressed.
His fucking.
The black lady, the Haitian that works for him, is what a lesbian?
Is she?
I don't know.
Yeah, and she gets ate up at the White House correspondence.
I saw this old clip of Joe Biden when he was a lot younger in politics, too, like totally against gay marriage.
Oh, yeah, he changed up his whole tune.
He switched, like totally switched.
He said some fucked up shit about the war on drugs, too.
He said some fucked up shit about black people.
He was like totally the opposite.
With his daughters, right?
With his daughters about black guys.
Yeah, maybe.
It was in front of Congress, but he like full on said the N word in front of Congress, like decades ago.
They just change it up, bro.
Motherfuckers change their words, but they don't change their essence.
No.
Yeah.
It's all for the money.
Yeah.
That's it.
Yeah.
Whatever the flavor of the fucking year is, they just go along with it.
If we do it right in America, we re elect Trump in 2024.
You think that's the right thing to do?
Mm hmm.
Really?
And then elect DeSantis in 2028, 2023.
Shout out.
You really think it'll be good if they elect Trump again?
Yeah.
Really?
Why?
Because, bro, he ain't.
You don't think he's kind of fucking.
He don't give a fuck about either side.
He really doesn't.
He really doesn't.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He'll shake shit up, bro.
He'll.
At the least, he shakes it up.
Yeah.
He makes you figure shit out.
At least it's different than what we've got going on now.
How much unity was there under Trump's presidency?
Unity?
It was better than right now.
I feel like at least you had.
Yeah, but you had two strong sides.
Now it just seems like.
Yeah, Trump, nobody even respects anything.
There might have been more unity, like.
You had.
With the right and the left might have.
Each been unified together, but there was definitely a now you just got a dirty pond of nothing.
Now everybody hates Biden.
Yeah.
I mean, nobody, nobody defends Biden back when Trump was president.
You only had anti Trumpers and Trumpers, right?
Exactly, right?
I'm cool with anti Trump.
You don't like money, dog.
Yeah.
How much is gas around this way?
Four.
How much was it two years ago?
250?
Yeah, two and change.
Okay.
Has your wages increased that much?
No.
I'll just be wondering.
Plus, the media, bro.
The media was making so much money when Trump was president.
There were kids that, not kids, but there were people like on YouTube, independent journalists that were making their whole career off just talking shit about Trump.
Like they were doing more numbers, more revenue than ever before because of Trump, because he was just feeding them all that meat.
He's a beast.
He is, man.
He is pretty wild.
I go see a Trump one man show.
Yeah.
100%.
1,200 to take it, give it to me.
All right.
Have you ever been to one of his rallies?
No.
I haven't been that extreme yet.
I should.
Bro, if Trump meets me, he'll follow me.
They'll put you on TV.
Oh, yeah.
100%.
I'd be the biggest black comedian in the world.
Yes.
You probably, wow.
You would.
All I got to do is go and make Trump jokes.
Yeah.
Bro, I'd be the biggest black comedian in the world.
For real.
If once the Republican Party gets a hold of me and find out that I look like this and I'm a black Republican.
Yeah.
Oh, bro, I'm a millionaire.
You know how Trump always says.
We got to be able to link you with DeSantis somehow.
Oh, for sure.
I need to read DeSantis.
For sure.
Florida is where woke comes to die.
Bro, I saw DeSanto at a hockey game at the Tampa Lightning game.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
He came to us.
We were in the suite right next door.
He walked.
There was like so, the biggest suite was next door to us.
He fucking walked in, bro.
The ladies, the moms, like the fucking cougars that were in our suite were climbing over the fucking window.
To get in to meet DeSantis, there was a man.
People were there was like more of a crowd than I could imagine Justin Bieber would have.
Like people clawing to get to him and get pictures with him.
There was like a line of 40 year old women going out the door and around the corner trying to get pictures with him.
It was insane.
And he's a governor.
Not even a president.
No, like it was like he was a huge celebrity, bro.
It was crazy.
I would never have imagined that a Florida governor would be like such a celebrity.
Who was our governor before?
Fucking, what's his name?
What's that weird looking guy?
Rick Scott.
Rick Scott.
Super Pharma.
You look like Valtimore from Harry Potter.
He was, yeah, he was basically the pill epidemic in Florida.
He was what?
The pill epidemic.
The pain pills.
Rick Scott was the one.
He was like a big pharma pain pill.
He took money.
He was the reason Florida was a pill epidemic central.
Yeah.
He took money from like big pharma.
He took money from.
His company had the single biggest fine in history.
His pharmaceutical company.
Roast this guy, bro.
Look at this guy.
Look at it.
Click on that one next to the pink one.
Yeah, click on that one.
Look.
Yeah.
He looks like a day walker.
He is, straight up.
Yeah.
I'm a little too fake.
He looks like someone you would.
Look at that.
Look at the one with him smiling.
No, to the right of that, right there.
Yeah.
He looks like someone I would not trust.
After this, I got to go get sober so I can perform.
I know we killed half the bottle.
Yeah, bro.
I got to get right.
What time are you performing?
Seven.
We're at Tampa Improv?
No, I'm at Side Splitters.
Side Splitters.
Yeah, bro.
They treat me well.
I don't know, man.
I don't know about the whole Trump thing.
You doing one show or what?
Or a couple?
Two shows.
Seven and ten?
I think so.
Here, bro.
Sober up.
All right.
Take some salt, baby.
Take some salt with you, man.
Woo!
Back out here like Ric Flair, baby.
Oh.
Nah, bro.
DeSantis is that guy.
I'm going to get me a place in Florida.
Are you?
Yeah.
South.
South of here?
Like where?
Like Miami for Lauderdale.
Yeah, somewhere around there.
This game, Locondo.
It's so much more expensive over there.
It's crazy.
Miami's different.
You know what's weird about here?
It's different than here.
Yeah, Miami's like a different fucking country.
It's not the same, bro.
It's like.
That's my breeding ground.
Yeah.
I don't know.
But it is a spot.
To me, Miami is like Vegas.
The best two days, the day you get there and the day you leave.
I can't fucking stand being a Miami man.
That's South Beach, bro.
I don't really fuck with South Beach.
Yeah, South Beach and like Brickle and shit.
That shit's so fucking busy and fast paced and it is insanely packed with people, bro.
It's insane.
Yeah, it can be.
I like South Florida all the time.
But it's nice.
Beautiful.
Yeah.
How often do you, if your kid's living in LA, how often do you get to see your kids?
Every day on FaceTime.
Every day on FaceTime.
Hell yeah.
But I go there like twice a month.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Are you still good with your baby mama?
Yeah.
Still tight with her?
Yeah, you just do what you're supposed to do, you'll be good.
I'll be there Monday, actually.
Cool, yeah, I'll go there Monday, fly there Monday, see my babies, and then I'm gonna have the youngest with me from Monday until January 5th.
Nice, through the holidays, yeah, that's dope.
What do they think about everything you're doing?
My eight year old loves it.
I remember one day I picked her up from school a few months ago, I flew into LA, picked her up from school, and she's like, Dad, um.
One of my friends was sad, so I told him that he and his whole family could have tickets to your next show.
I was like, babe, just melt your heart, right?
It's so cool.
No, it cost me some money.
What?
It burned a hole in my wallet, babe.
I was like, hell no.
No, that's cool.
They recognize it, though, man.
They think like that.
That's super cool.
Yeah.
It's rare.
That's rare that I meet people.
How old are you?
I'm about to be 33.
37.
28.
Yeah, I'm 35.
And it's so rare that I meet people that are my age that have kids.
I feel like.
You got kids?
Yeah, I got two kids.
I mean, two, three, and three months.
Three and goddamn.
One's three years old, one's three months old.
Three month old be crying and shit.
Nah, bro, the three month old is the best.
The first kid was like up every three hours during the night for the first year and a half.
This baby only wakes up once during the night.
My wife just takes care of him.
I don't have to do shit for the new baby.
Oh, that's lit.
Yeah, it's great, bro.
I just deal with the toddler.
It's like man on man defense.
I just take the toddler, my wife takes the baby.
The two year old was a beast.
My eight year old was pretty simple.
Both girls, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, I haven't had any girls.
Damn.
I feel like girls are.
Everyone says that girls are better because when you get old, the girls will take care of the dad.
Yeah.
The guys will just start chasing pussy and they'll forget about the dad.
Yeah, they'll put you in a nursing home, bro.
Yeah.
The girls won't.
My eight year old will take.
My eight year old, I know she'll take care of me for forever.
Yeah.
She's a real daddy's girl.
Yeah.
That's dope.
Two year old, she's.
You're lucky you got girls.
She's kind of independent.
I don't know if she'll give a fuck about me.
Isn't it weird how they're so fucking different, like right out of the oven?
Yeah.
Just like baked in.
Yeah, it's crazy.
It's.
Two different totally personalities, so weird, and they're probably raised the same, right?
They grew up together, yeah.
I don't know how it happens, yeah.
Kids are weird, bro.
They they like totally different.
My two year old loves cheese, eight year old hates cheese, so weird, bro.
She likes popcorn.
My eight year old don't with it, yeah.
Do they watch your stand up?
Uh, she watched some of my videos, does she?
What does she think?
What does she do?
Does she like she gets here?
My eight year old, she'll probably be a stand up comedian, you think?
Yeah, yeah.
She gets humor so crazy since she was like five.
So cool.
Yeah, I don't know how.
I'm like, what?
She got that fucking gene.
She got that funny gene.
She knows how to structure jokes right now.
Like she tells me jokes all the time, all the time, really.
Yeah, that's so cool.
All the time, all the time, that's so cool.
She'll text me jokes.
I'm like, man, all right, yeah, funny.
And then you roast her.
No, we don't really roll.
You don't roast your daughter when you do like when you do any given show, how much of it ends up being just crowd work, like roasting people in the crowd, and then like how much of it is like how much, how often does your Set your normal set like go off the rails and you just start with the crowd.
So, out of an hour, I probably do like 15 20 minutes of crowd work, but you got to be careful with crowd work because it can quickly go far left.
What do you mean?
Like, people just get crazy, start shouting out.
So, you got to be careful, really?
Yeah, you ever had anyone like try to get violent?
I'm a big dude, yeah, you are a big dude.
Johnny Mitchell's a big dude, dude.
He had a guy like pull him right off the stage, he's kind of a skinny guy, that's true.
You ain't terrified of that.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.
He told the guy, he's like, you've been fucked in every hole, haven't you?
Guy didn't do anything.
It's like, oh, you were a snitch.
Then the guy jumped on stage and fucking grabbed him.
That clip went viral.
Yeah, bro.
It had like 5 million views or something crazy like that.
We'll see.
You know, I don't know.
Jeremy's is dope.
It's been my boy for a long time.
But yeah, that shit.
Yeah, I don't really get that.
The other thing I wanted to ask you, you mentioned it briefly last time you were on the podcast, but we didn't get to talk about it that much.
What's that?
You mentioned that your grandfather was Frank Lucas?
My great uncle.
Oh, your great uncle was Frank Lucas.
Yeah.
That's fucking crazy.
So, how did you first learn about that?
Did your mom just tell you that one day?
No.
So, Frank, my dad's from Cuba.
Frank Lucas's brother adopted my daddy.
So, that's how he became.
I mean, not Frank Lucas' daddy, Frank Lucas' brother.
Did I say that right?
I'm a little drunk.
Frank Lucas's brother adopted your daddy.
Mm hmm.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, yeah.
That's how I got the Lucas last night.
Oh, that's fucking wild, bro.
That's really cool, bro.
Yeah.
I met him.
I met Frank like two times.
He died in 2019.
Couldn't go to the funeral.
I met him in Virginia.
I'm still in touch with all my cousins.
Well, a few of my cousins.
What did your dad say about growing up with him?
I mean, my dad, your dad grew up with his brother.
Me and my dad don't communicate that much.
Meeting Frank Lucas In Atlanta 00:04:30
No.
I don't really talk about it too much.
But I have a cousin.
Obi, shout out to Obi Lucas out in California.
He'll call me like once every three months.
He's an older guy.
And he's my cousin or something.
He's like 60s.
And he'll call me every few months and he'd be like, David, tell these niggas Frank Lucas our people.
And I'm like, yeah, Frank Lucas.
Frank Lucas.
Just for some validation.
You know, he's probably telling a wild ass story.
He's telling them over there like, no fucking way.
He's like, I'm gonna call somebody every few months.
I'll get a call from him, be like, David, tell these Frank Lucas our people.
I'm like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's you know, there was a really extravagant background story to that, and he just needed that one confirmation to legitimize it.
He put on speakerphone, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm about to call it right now.
Hold on, yeah, yeah, watch.
Oh man, that's great, bro.
That's a cool tie, though.
So, how long until that, how long until the uh, that comedy club in Austin is ready and you guys are like performing in there?
So, I think.
The date of completion is mid March, and you know, training and everything.
I figure we should have shows up and running in March.
I mean, hello.
Damn, I'm drunk.
Fuck.
How much of the alien killed?
Half the bottle, bro.
I guess that's a lot.
That shit's strong.
Yeah, it's strong.
And I have an eight shit.
I'm buzzing.
I have eight shit.
Buzzing?
Yeah.
Woo!
So completion should be mid February.
Okay.
And then we should have shows probably March.
And it's called the Mothership.
The Mothership.
We gotta go.
Fucking sick, bro.
Come on out.
Yeah, we gotta go.
There's a strip club in Tampa called 2001s, and they have a flying saucer on top of it.
And the flying saucer is like, what is it?
Private rooms.
The private rooms.
Private lap dance.
Has a UFO in the roof.
It's crazy.
Is it a nice strip club?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Tampa got some of the best.
Tampa's like famous strip clubs.
Like strip club capital of the world.
I've heard of you.
Oh, yeah.
Over Houston?
I haven't been there, but I've seen videos.
It looks different.
It's different.
I don't know about Atlanta, bro.
Different women.
Actually, I have been to a strip club in Atlanta.
Different.
Magic City?
I've never been to Magic City, but I went to one really nice strip club in Atlanta.
The shit was like a shopping mall.
Tampa got a lot of white and Spanish women.
Okay.
Yeah.
If that's okay.
Yeah.
But there's a lot of black women too.
The food at Magic City is.
Yeah.
Is it good?
Can you pull up a picture of Magic City Wings?
Is it good?
They named them after a basketball player because remember he got a fine.
The Lou Williams.
Oh, Lou Williams.
No shit.
Yeah.
Because he got like a $100,000 fine to go get these wings.
Yeah.
To go get their chicken wings.
Yeah.
Oh, how funny is that?
A couple years ago.
Slide.
Look at them, bitch.
Look at that shit.
Ooh, fuck, that looks good.
Hell yeah.
Hey, there's someone to eat right here.
I'm hungry in the mouth.
Yeah, bro, we can go right next door and get some food.
I need some, bro.
I fucking throw up.
Bro, there's a strip club.
What's it called?
The Penthouse Club in Tampa.
They got fire steaks.
Good stuff.
They got good food, man.
Really good food.
I recommend the Penthouse Club or I've never been inside of 2001s, but I heard the fucking flying sausage.
There's no food there.
I don't want to take 2001.
That's the Penthouse Club.
They got fire food.
Look, go scroll down.
Look at their steaks.
That steak does look amazing.
Dine at prime.
I wouldn't care about the hoes.
I'd be in there for them.
Yeah.
Bro, it's weird.
Some of the, at the penthouse club and like the dollhouse, some of the, like the bar girl, the girls that serve the drinks, the waitresses, they're like way finer than the strippers.
Yeah.
Yeah, the drink girls.
They don't have daddy issues.
Right, right.
They're just in it for the money.
Yeah, I want to be halfway naked, not naked.
Yeah.
And they probably still make the same amount of money.
Sometimes more.
You think they make more?
Sometimes.
Bro, how crazy is it that at the strip clubs in Tampa, these girls travel from like the East Coast to work there?
Those girls be like, I live in Orlando, I live in Cocoa Beach.
They drive two or three hours just to go strip at this.
I mean, if you can come make you know six, seven grand a weekend, why not?
Yeah, that just goes to show you how good Tampa is for strip clubs.
They probably making more.
Yeah, they got Tom Brady over here now, and you can actually control your income.
Paying To Dance For Cash 00:01:04
Like, who gonna say?
Who said you counted all those ones?
Yeah.
You don't have to pay tax on all of it.
Right.
And from what I found out, girls pay to dance at clubs.
Yeah.
Yes.
They pay to dance.
Yeah.
They get like a percentage of their money, right?
Well, they pay to dance for the night and then keep, usually keep what they get.
Split it with the DJ or something.
I thought they just had to like do like a revenue share.
I don't know.
I know over here, like locally, that they pay to dance.
Yeah.
And most of your clubs, I think they pay to dance.
Yeah.
Joe, when Joe Redner was on here, I think he said that.
Yeah.
You go, you pay, you might pay a couple hundred bucks or 150 bucks to dance for the night, keep what you get, break off the DJ, the bartender.
Fuck, that's wild.
The door guy, whatever.
All right, let's go get some food, bro.
Thanks for coming on, man.
Of course, man.
Shout out everybody where they can find more of your shit online.
Yeah, man.
DavidLucasComedy.com.
Got the tour coming up in 2023, baby.
DavidLucasFunny on Instagram.
Y'all already know who it is.
Your boy.
Hell yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Happy Hanukkah.
Merry Christmas.
Good night, world.
Happy Kwanzaa.
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