John R. Brinkley, a fraudulent doctor, surgically implanted goat testicles into thousands of humans based on Sidney B. Flower's 1921 theories that sex energy drives vitality. Hosts analyze how Brinkley performed vasectomies to redirect this force, claiming success in curing dementia and restoring menstruation via goat ovaries, while causing deaths from infection. The discussion highlights the pseudoscientific acceptance of these crude procedures and compares them to modern concepts like Jordan Peterson's sex energy, ultimately exposing the horrific medical negligence disguised as revolutionary health care. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Trust Your Girlfriends00:02:47
This is an iHeart podcast.
Guaranteed human.
When a group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist, they take matters into their own hands.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He is not going to get away with this.
He's going to get what he deserves.
We always say that: trust your girlfriends.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ego Modern.
My next guest, it's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
He goes, just give it a shot.
But if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of life.
Listen to Thanksgiving on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
In 2023, bachelor star Clayton Eckard was accused of fathering twins, but the pregnancy appeared to be a hoax.
You doctored this particular test twice, Miss Owens, correct?
I doctored the test once.
It took an army of internet detectives to uncover a disturbing pattern.
Two more men who'd been through the same thing.
Greg Goespiece and Michael Manchini.
My mind was blown.
I'm Stephanie Young.
This is Love Trapped.
Laura, Scottsdale Police.
As the season continues, Laura Owens finally faces consequences.
Listen to Love Trapped podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
10-10 shots five, City Hall building.
How could this have happened in City Hall?
Somebody tell me that.
Jeffrey Woods.
A shocking public murder.
This is one of the most dramatic events that really ever happened in New York City politics.
They screamed, get down, get down.
Those are shots.
A tragedy that's now forgotten.
And a mystery that may or may not have been political, that may have been about sex.
Listen to Rorschach, murder at City Hall on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Welcome to Behind the Bastards Morning Edition, the early edition of Behind the Bastards for morning people recorded early in the morning.
In fact, I have it on good authority that this is the earliest a podcast has ever been recorded in the history of the medium.
That's the thing we sacrificed.
Mystery at City Hall00:05:03
What time is it, Robert?
The bastards.
Rob, what time is it?
My eyes won't even focus, Sophie.
It's so early in the morning.
Clocks don't even display the time.
Surely dawn has not broken.
Katie, how long have you been awake?
Minutes.
Minutes, yeah.
It's the horrible hour of 12:34 p.m.
Yes, well, welcome to Behind the Stars.
I've been awake for many hours behind the back.
Cody, how are you doing on this, again, ungodly morning?
This hour so early that roosters can't even crow because the sun would be like, don't crow yet, rooster.
It's not time for you.
It's not time.
Yeah, I could hear that you would tell the rooster.
They're like, that's like a trip.
You still got that morning phlegm stuff going on.
Well, it's hot as fuck and it's still so early.
It is hot.
It is hot.
Yeah, it is hot.
It is hot.
Just like my co-hosts today, who I guess I already introduced, but I wanted to do another introduction.
Yeah, we are both hot.
Cody's got his ice pack to his face.
Cody is holding an ice pack to his body because his air conditioning is broken.
How are you both doing today?
Oh, you know, just here I am here.
You're here.
I've done stuff.
I got a question for you both.
Yeah.
We finished our Ben Shapiro episodes a while back.
I've been lost without them.
Yeah.
Do you both feel like there's a gnawing emptiness in the center of your soul, a pit that cannot be filled?
I mean, yeah, but I didn't make the connection between that and Ben Shapiro until right now.
So just like a general sense.
Yeah, just a general sense that like the center of your being has been hollowed out by some sort of earth mover, leaving you like a, like a, like a, like a bag of flesh without, without, um, without meat inside it.
Yeah.
Meatless bag.
A meatless bag.
A meatless bag of human.
Just screeching into the night, Brat!
Wishing he were still there, but he's not.
Ben won't give him back to us because we didn't appreciate him enough.
I know, I you didn't.
You, the listener, took it for granted.
Every night, I mumble, take a bullet for you, babe, over and over and over again.
I know.
You also text that to our group chat.
It's getting disturbing, yeah.
Take a bullet for you, babe.
It's called love, so I don't know what the problem is.
That's Cody's love language, you guys.
Got his love language.
I am well informed, Cody, that love is a battlefield, so you might get a chance.
So we need another book, and I was thinking maybe let's try something a little bit different.
We may have to go through a couple of things, but there were a handful of different things.
Game of Thrones!
I'm just going to read Game of Thrones to you, motherfuckers.
Are we ever going to get that last book, do you think?
No.
Absolutely not.
No, What a disappointment.
I mean, as an author who has written a fiction book, were I to get hundreds of millions of dollars and buy a lighthouse, I would probably stop producing fiction.
Also, like, they nailed it in the show.
So why even bother?
Why mess with perfection, right?
Yeah.
Okay.
The power of stories, you see, is the true meaning of the Game of Thrones.
Cody's being sarcastic because I don't think he believes a word of what he said.
No, it's terrible.
And maybe having one of the main characters practically look at the camera and go, truly, the writers of the stories.
Are they really heroes?
Maybe a terrible idea.
I forgot that that happened.
It's so bad.
It's going to turn into just a Game of Thrones podcast.
Well, I just reached up and grabbed a book from my bookshelf.
And this is a special book.
You can hear it.
I'm doing the cinema Verité thing.
I want you to hear me open this.
Wow.
I'm taking it out of a very nice plastic wrapped package.
And I'm pulling up the really nice business card that the person who sent it gave me.
Because this was sent to me by, well, I don't know if I should read his name.
I'll just give his first name.
A guy named, well, I don't know if I should do that.
This was sent to me by a rare books dealer who was a fan of the show.
And I have your business card in front of me, friend.
I'm not going to read it because I don't know if you would want me to read your name out on the air to a couple hundred thousand people.
This person's at home going, no, no, read it, read it.
Look, I want you to know that I appreciate it.
Well, I'll say it's Ellipsis Rare Books.
So this wonderful person at Ellipsis Rare Books sent me a lovely card and a really nice letter and a copy of, can you guys see what the cover says?
No.
Dr. Brinkley's Theory00:15:02
Well, maybe.
The Goat Glenn Transplantation.
Oh, the goat gland and transplantation.
Transplantation.
So, once upon a time, friends, there was a man named John R. Brinkley.
And we've done a two-parter on John R. Brinkley for Behind the Bastards.
And I'm happy that you're both kind of coming in cold to this because Brinkley's an odd fellow.
And we talk about his whole life in the show.
John R. Brinkley was a fake doctor who believed that if you surgically inserted goat testicles into the testicles of human beings, it would make them sexual dynamos and provide a wide variety of health benefits.
I think, okay, I'm sorry.
I'm not a scientist.
Oh, no, no, no.
I don't think that's a very strong hypothesis.
And I don't think it warrants an experiment to test this out.
Well, he did more than an experiment.
He was one of the most popular doctors in the country.
He operated clinics in multiple states.
He inserted goat glands.
That's what he called testicles, his glands, into thousands upon thousands of human beings.
A lot of people died and got horrific infections.
He was eventually stripped of his medical license, but he used the money that he made.
Because he was in prison?
No, no, of course not.
No.
Yeah, no.
He, I mean, he ran for governor of Kansas and he didn't quite get it.
He ran for office a couple of times and eventually fled to Mexico.
But he operated in the U.S., in the south of Texas, a massive or sorry, and in Mexico, a massive like radio station, like the most powerful one in the world.
And he became a country music pioneer and helped to, because of the people he put on his show, create like the modern concept of country music.
So he is a man who surgically inserted testicles into thousands of people, leading to unspeakable suffering and death, and also helped create country music.
A true jack of all trades.
Yeah, well, two, two trades.
Well, he's three.
He's a fascinating jack of enough trades.
And this is plenty of trades.
This is a book by Sidney B. Flower called The Guide to Goat, the Goat Trans, the Goat Gland Transplantation.
And I don't know who Sidney B. Flower is, but he must be related to.
Yeah, because there's a picture of John R. Brinkley right in the center here.
So this is one of the books that Dr. Brinkley's because, you know, like I said, he had offices in multiple states.
He had a massive enterprise.
This is one of the things that he put out.
And we're going to give it a read on the air and we'll see.
It's not a huge book.
Maybe this has the legs for multiple episodes.
Maybe this is just something we talk about today.
But we're going to talk about goat gland transplantation today.
And I hope you all enjoy coming in cold to this wonderful story of a man who put another animal's testicles inside human beings.
I've introduced so far.
More than once.
A lot of times, Cody.
A shocking number of times.
Did people die?
One would be shocking, but yeah.
Yes, Katie.
People absolutely died.
People died.
Yes.
Just wanted to make sure.
You know how if you get like a cut and you rub dirt in it, the cut will get infected?
Sure.
Well, imagine that cut is your genitalia and the dirt is another animal's genitalia that are just being crudely shoved in there by a guy who's mostly into running a radio station.
Yeah, okay.
It doesn't work great, is what I'm saying.
I'll see you guys later.
I'm gonna go back to bed.
Yeah.
So this is as the intro period.
So there's, we've got us a picture of John Brinkley, which is the same picture of Dr. Brinkley that's in his Wikipedia page.
So it must be the one that he considered his best photo, which is not a good photograph.
Like, not at all.
He looks like shit in this picture.
He's toe-headed, I think is the fair way to describe him.
His head looks like a toe.
So I okay, but I think toe-headed is an actual phrase for somebody that's like blonde.
Oh, well, I think it's a phrase for someone whose head looks like a cat.
Maybe thumb-headed?
Thumb-headed?
He could be a thumb.
Yeah, his whole body looks like a knuckle.
Toe face.
So the title page informs us that this is number five in the One Best Way series of new thought books, The Goat Gland Transplantation, as originated and successfully performed by J.R. Brinkley, MD of Milford, Kansas, USA, in over 600 operations upon men and women.
Set up and electrotyped, May 1921.
So this is, you know, three years after World War I ended, people are looking for good news, and Dr. Brinkley is offering them the good news that they can get another animal's testicles shoved inside of them.
Author's preface.
What?
Katie, that's good news.
Congratulations.
You have been selected.
Yeah.
Yeah, imagine if that was what they called you about instead of your car's extended warranty.
We have exciting news about the kinds of testicles we can put inside of you.
You're eligible for an upgrade.
Author's preface.
Though dealing exactly with a surgical subject, this book is a layman's word to laymen.
It is an attempt to say to the general public a few things about this amazing work of Dr. J.R. Brinkley of Milford, Kansas, which he is debarred from saying for himself in this simple form.
He has under consideration a book of his own covering the subject of goat gland transplantation, his experiments, successes, failures, theories, and conclusions, which will probably be issued in the winter of 1922.
So basically, he's got a big book for doctors coming out, but this is a book for you, the little guy.
This is a book for the common man to understand all of the complexities about having another animal's glands shoved into your body.
So that's how this is being built.
Okay.
Oh, God.
Okay, yeah.
Some attention is paid to the pioneer work of Dr. Frank Lidston of Chicago in the transplanting of human glands into human beings.
But rather, by way of emphasizing the fact that Dr. Brinkley, with the choice of human, monkey, goat, or sheep glands before him, chose the goat glands in preference to any other for his field of experiment and operation, and has never for a moment regretted his choice or seen any reason to alter it.
Never for a moment.
Don't even ask me.
Have your choice of glands.
Human, monkey, goat, sheep.
So without any wish to enter upon a controversy, the author is impelled to take some notice of the statement of Dr. Sergei Voronov of Paris, who during his recent visit to the United States announced that he pinned his faith almost exclusively to the glands of the anthropoid apes as most suitable for transplantation into human beings.
While he lamented the natural scarcity of obtainable material, Dr. Voronov is credited with having performed over 120 of transplantations upon rams, but none whatsoever of goat glands upon human beings, and not more than two or three of simian glands upon Human beings.
His statement, therefore, that successful transplantation of the glands of the goat into a human being is impossible and cannot succeed is empirical and entirely unsupported by any experience of his own in the matter.
So they're defending Dr. Brinkley, this other doctor who's putting ape testicles in people, is like, you can't put goat balls in people.
That's just not going to work.
But these others.
First off the bat, we have to argue against that guy because Dr. Brinkley, as we're informed by the book, has done this more than 600 times successfully.
So we go through this introduction.
It is a fact beyond all gainsaying that Dr. Brinkley's operation has in truth cheated old age of its toil in very many cases of both sexes, and the improvement or rejuvenation affects both the minds and bodies of those treated by this method, and this rejuvenation is lasting to the extent of the doctor's observation.
It is presuming to say that it is a permanent improvement.
Upon that point, no one has any right to offer an opinion because there are no facts upon which to found it.
But Dr. Brinkley's earliest cases, operated upon three years ago up to the present time, have shown no dimutation whatsoever in the effects secured.
Neither the women nor the men have lost any particle of their increased vitality during this lapse of time.
Who can say how long the good effects will continue?
Dr. Brinkley's opinion is that the improvement will run for possibly 15 years, at the end of which time, he expects to reoperate upon any cases that show a slowing down in the life process.
Yes, Katie, you have questions about this?
This is absurd.
Wait, so how many people had a successful transplant and then went on to like have he's saying 600 men and women experienced an increase in vitality after having these goat testicles stuffed in them?
Okay.
I'd like to see that data.
Well, I mean, I bet by the end of this book, I'll be able to perform this surgery.
Cody, you're up.
Okay, so this is no poet's dream, but the stern reality of a young surgeon's work in hospital, extending over three memorable years of achievement in a virgin field.
Dr. Brinkley has worked out his problem alone, save for the devoted aid of his wife, who is also a licensed physician.
He is today a poor man and expects to remain so because he has refused every alluring offer made him looking to the establishment of this goat bland operation as a commercial proposition on a big scale.
He is governed by his ethical vows and retains his independence, but the world would call him a fool for not turning his discovery to his greatest pecuniary profit.
Since he prefers to remain true to his ideals in this matter, it is for us at least to be thankful and accord him the recognition to which the scientist is entitled who puts his work above his profits.
Okay, so what I'm getting from this is that everyone's like, you're no, dude, we're not.
You got a profit.
And then this is like some fanboy writing the book saying that he's a good idea.
Yeah, I mean, this is a guy Dr. Brinkley hired, and he wants to make it clear that Dr. Brinkley isn't getting rich.
Although he absolutely was getting rich.
He made millions of dollars before he died penniless as a result of all of the malpractice allegations against him.
But yeah.
Yeah, so he's a hero.
He's a hero.
He's a hero.
We are not.
So chapter one, Dr. Brinkley's theory.
Oh, the theory.
Good.
Yeah, yeah.
Are you excited to hear the theory?
I bet it's sound.
I am so excited.
Yeah, it has been a long quest and, in the main, fruitless, though it might be said in fairness that Brown Sicard's method of using the expressed testicular juice as medicine by mouth or injection for the renewal of youth was probably the true parent of the present method familiar method of using the extracts of various glands or the pulverized substance of the glands themselves.
What?
What?
Yeah, apparently.
So this was a thing back in the day.
And I had not heard that they had just expressed testicle juice and given it to people, but I guess that's how this started.
Yeah, you got to start out light.
You just juice the balls and give it to somebody, which sounds like you're just drinking cum, right?
Is that I actually think you juice and they're just grinding up the entire testicle.
Yeah, pulverize, you pulverize it, right?
Yeah, you pulverize the balls.
You got to pulverize the balls and then drink the ball juice.
Jesus Christ.
Genius is synthetic, elliptic, and sudden, but always clear and sure.
Dr. Brinkley began with a theory, and by no means a new theory.
From the theory he deduced rapidly and acted.
The results of the acts prove the truth of the theory.
That theory has been variously stated, in its most familiar form being, quote, in all living forms, the basis of all energy is sex energy.
That's like, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, this is like tied into all this weird stuff they believed about cum back in the old days.
Like if you the humors, right?
Like, yeah.
If you ejaculate, you're losing vitality, so you never want to come unless you have to because it's going to make you weaker.
It's like Proud Boy stuff.
It's no fap.
Does that last I checked in?
He hadn't come in like four years.
That's horrible.
That's also someone that is probably not a super safe person, I would guess.
I didn't come.
I was like, I don't think it was benefiting his life very well.
No, that's not.
Saving up that life energy was doing any good.
That's like a proud boy thing, the no-fap stuff.
That's one of the things that's so funny about it is that they're like specifically going back to things that like this dudes like this believed in 1920.
Like if you, if you, if you don't come, you, you retain all of that energy to be more powerful.
And that's, I think, in general, if you're the kind of person who is like, well, I'm just going to save up all of my cum so that I can keep all of the power inside myself, you might be kind of unhinged.
I'm going to save up all of my cums so I can make one super baby.
One gigantic baby.
It's going to be the biggest baby in the world.
Okay.
Yeah.
Looking for the facts to confirm or disprove this assertion.
All investigators have been faced with similar phenomena, such as when the male fowl is sterilized in order that he may grow big and fat for the market later, he loses his cock's plumage and gains in weight.
In the psychic domain, the changes are still more marked.
The Capon is a coward, shunning the contest for supremacy.
He does not forage for the hens, inviting them to feed upon what he has found, but looks after himself first and last.
He is lazy, thuggish, and selfish.
Oh boy.
So yeah, this is like some Jordan Peterson stuff being like, well, when you geld an animal, it becomes, it changes its behavior and it becomes like lethargic and less aggressive.
And so clearly, if you come as a human man, you will also become weak.
Yeah, your energy is gone.
Your energy is gone.
You've given it.
It's less Jordan Peterson.
It's more Cernovich, right?
Yeah, there's a lot of people.
He literally has.
I feel like he's literally written stuff about that.
Yeah, actually, this next paragraph might be a Mike Cernovich paragraph.
He may have just stolen this.
When men are castrated, as in the East in youth, when they are prized as custodians of the harem, they are fat, unusually large a frame, but short-lived.
The growth of hair on the head is often scant.
On the face and body, it is altogether missing.
The voice is high, partaking of a treble quality.
When through surgical operations or accident it happens that a man is deprived of the testicular glands in youth, early manhood, or even middle age, the same changes follow as in the case of the eunuch.
The hair on the face and body disappears.
The voice changes from deep to high tone.
And mentally, the man develops inertia and cowardice.
The Voice Changes Tone00:05:23
Who knows?
Yeah, I mean, I, for one thing, I'm fairly certain that eunuchs were renowned to live longer.
Yeah, this all seems really based in facts, Robert.
So I don't know.
It's called science.
I don't know what you want.
Yeah, if I'm remembering from Game of Thrones, they could still be very aggressive.
That's right.
That's the whole point.
Yeah.
Varys lived through all of it.
So I think Varis died at the end.
I think he died eventually.
Yeah, the unsullied, right?
The Unsullied, though.
And they were still in the middle of the day.
They were only doing Batman Can't.
Yeah.
They definitely were.
Unsullied were very cute.
Yeah, they were.
They were, Katie.
But not according to John Brinkley.
When women have, for any reason, had their overears removed by surgical operation, marked changes follow, which vary much in detail, but carry certain general similarities.
The face and body age rapidly in appearance, and there is a slowing up of functions of the organs with a tendency to masculinity and tastes, behavior, and feelings.
I hate this guy.
In any notes?
Just fucking.
I'm a man of science, all right?
I'm just, I go where the facts are.
You are.
Follow the facts.
Follow the facts.
So speaking of the facts, Cody, Katie, please.
You want to know a fact that I have that I've got for you right now?
This is a fact.
Is it about what would it be?
It's about the products and services that support this podcast.
Oh, yeah, we got to do that.
Yeah, we got to do that.
So just the facts, people.
And the fact is, it's time for you to motherfucking listen to ads.
There's two golden rules that any man should live by.
Rule one, never mess with a country girl.
You play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
And rule two, never mess with her friends either.
We always say, trust your girlfriends.
I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of The Girlfriends...
Oh my God, this is the same man.
A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist.
I felt like I got hit by a truck.
I thought, how could this happen to me?
The cops didn't seem to care.
So they take matters into their own hands.
They said, oh, hell no.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He's going to get what he deserves.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Laurie Siegel, and on Mostly Human, I go beyond the headlines with the people building our future.
This week, an interview with one of the most influential figures in Silicon Valley, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman.
I think society is going to decide that creators of AI products bear a tremendous amount of responsibility to products we put out in the world.
From power to parenthood.
Kids, teenagers, I think they will need a lot of guardrails around AI.
This is such a powerful and such a new thing.
From addiction to acceleration.
The world we live in is a competitive world, and I don't think that's going to stop, even if you did a lot of redistribution.
You know, we have a deep desire to excel and be competitive and gain status and be useful to others.
And it's a multiplayer game.
What does the man who has extraordinary influence over our lives have to say about the weight of that responsibility?
Find out on Mostly Human.
My highest order bit is to not destroy the world with AI.
Listen to Mostly Human on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate setting.
Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of my favorite musicians.
Over the past two seasons, I've had special guests like Dave Grohl, Leve, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name.
And this season, I've sat down with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more.
Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
He related to the Phantom at that point.
Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
Share each day with me each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I.
So come hang out with us in the studio and listen to Playing Along on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ego Moda.
My next guest, you know, from Step Brothers, Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and the Big Money Players Network.
It's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
I went and had lunch with him one day, and I was like, and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot.
I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings.
I'm working my way up through and I know it's a place to come look for up and coming talent.
Sex Energy Basis00:04:57
He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet.
Yeah.
He goes, but there's so much luck involved.
And he's like, just give it a shot.
He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of luck.
Yeah.
Listen to Thanks Dad on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
We're back.
Oh my gosh.
I love a good, I love a, I love an ad.
I, for one, plan to get all of the goat gland transplants advertised on this show.
No, sure, 100%.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely not.
So use those promo codes.
Yeah.
How about now?
It is important always that you realize that though we may seem to stress the physical improvement in human beings brought about by this gland transplantation, the more important change of the two is the mental.
And Dr. Brinkley's theory that all caps now, all energy is sex energy, means exactly that the powerful brain, equally with the beautiful face, owes its strength and vigor exactly to the right functioning of the sex glands.
We must not be accused here of running to extravagance.
It is not stated that all human brains are of equal power or can be developed to equal power.
It is stated that all human brains of unusual power are brains that are well nourished by the testicular secretions.
And it is implied with full understanding of what this statement leads to, that if for any reason there is an interference with this sex gland activity, the unusual brain will cease in a short time to be unusual in its power, grasp, and faculty of clear, continuous thought.
There are so many phrases in that sentence that I went, what?
You got notes on this, Katie.
All right.
No, I don't.
I don't have notes.
I couldn't keep up with them.
But I just don't like this guy.
There was something about sexual secretions.
What was happening to here again?
Yeah, that if you have an unusual brain, and that means like in a positive sense, like a brain of unusual quality, it's because your texticles are bathing your brain in secretions.
Yep, that was the first one that I reacted to.
I did not know that.
That's why men are naturally smarter than women, I think, is what the book is saying.
Because women don't have testicular secretions to coat the brain.
And here I was beating myself up for being so dumb.
And now I know the reason why.
I do think all energy is sex energy is a catchy phrase.
Yeah, it's a catchy phrase.
You can see why it works.
It sounds like something a dude, it sounds like something like a tantric sex guru would say in Goa to a tourist in order to get her to fucking.
Maybe some like edgy sports drinks uses it as their slogan.
If there was like a Red Bull style beverage that said all energy is sex energy on the can and that was just the name of the drink, I would never drink anything else.
That would be a good idea.
I'm telling you, this would be something we should do.
Yeah.
And make sure to make a million dollars.
Maybe we throw it on a shirt.
Yeah, all energy is sex energy.
It could just be a picture of the three of us being pals, giving the thumbs up, and then all energy is sex energy in big block letters.
Can we make it?
That has to be a worst year ever merch.
Yeah, let's do it.
It was, I mean, it's just true.
It is true.
All energy is trying to spread the caps right here on page 14 of this ridiculous little book.
You know what this guy's scientific field is called?
Science.
Alchemy.
Cody's been.
You know what?
That's going to do it for us today.
So, you see how amazing and far-reaching is the application of this apparently simple theory that sex energy is the basis of all human energy.
It is, after all, only another way of saying that all things proceed from a common source, that life is one, that mind and body derive from the same source, that energy is so much an integral of matter that in the final analysis, matter is only static energy since the atom is made of molecules and molecules of electrons and electrons of electricity or energy.
In saying, therefore, that sex energy is the basis of all human energy, we may quite possibly be trending towards a solution of the world-old question of what life itself is.
Someday, without a doubt, we shall surprise this secret at its source.
At present, we are fortunate to have discovered through Dr. Brinkley's careful proving of his theory that human energy, no matter its manifestation to be physical or mental, has a common basis of supply, the sex glands, and that their activity determines a brilliant mentality or a dull brain.
Oh my God.
So this is the secret to the source of all life.
It all starts with testicles, everything.
In the beginning of time, there was just a pair of balls lying on the earth that got hit by lightning.
Transplanting Goat Glands00:14:07
Then there was a lot of fish.
Yeah.
It's just basic.
You learn that in Sunday school.
You learn that in Sunday school.
Next, we have a picture of Dr. Brinkley and his wife, and he does look like a man who is bursting with sex energy.
Like his brain is just dripping in testicular secretions.
They aren't touching.
Well, if you were to touch Dr. Brinkley, you would explode out of lust.
You would come so fucking fast.
Yeah, it would be a full body cum, which is a real, can be a real problem, especially since people only had like one set of clothing back then.
Chapter 2, The Practice.
Men.
Dr. Brinkley began his experiments in gland transplanting upon animals in the year 1911, three years before the European War, using goats, sheep, and guinea pigs as his subjects.
He ran beyond the limits of his resources in this experimental work on animals, which was interrupted by his enlistment in the army.
Da-da-da.
Okay, so yeah, we're talking about a little bit of his history here.
Let's move on to how you shove testicles into people.
Later, we will dwell a little more on some of his results.
It is worthy of note in passing that his first experiment upon a human being was an unqualified success.
He transplanted the goat glands into a farmer who was 46 years of age, happily married, but childless.
And one year after the transplantation, a child was born, who was christened Billy in honor of the circumstances.
No, no, Yeah.
Yeah, that's good stuff.
Yeah, he, he.
How did it spell Billy?
B-I-L-L-Y.
So it goes on to note, which is something we talk about in our episodes.
Middle name goat.
I hope.
Yeah, Billy.
You know, Billy, your mother and I couldn't make you because my sperm was too weak.
But then a doctor put an animal's balls in me.
And now here you are, Billy.
At some point, they told him that.
Like, why am I called Billy?
Well, son, gather around.
So, yeah.
It goes on to note that Dr. Brinkley prefers the Toggenberg breed of Swiss goat because it has the best testicles.
He has picked it.
Speaking, this is true.
Yeah.
He picks it because it doesn't smell like other goat testicles and because he doesn't want human beings to smell like goat balls.
So he picks the goat that smells least like balls.
So there you go.
Wait, what years were these?
1921 is when this is written.
Right there.
Right then.
That heyday.
You could do anything back then.
You really could.
God, I wish I'd come of age then.
I would have made so much money, you guys.
I'd have been shoving things into people like left and we may have been there.
I might have been John Brinkley.
You're right.
I mean, there is a world.
Because I love cutting things and I love being on the radio.
So I do feel like I would have done the same things he did, more or less.
This is a side note, but a psychic once told me that in a past life, I was a dolphin.
And I should cut this, cut this, cut this because everybody will get mad at me.
Whenever I've mentioned anything hooky-bookie that I do for fun, people get mad at me, so cut it.
People get so angry.
They also like to believe it's true.
They got angry at me last week, a bunch of people, because I said that we should have bullies go around and beat up Bill Gates when he was a child so he didn't become a monster.
How dare you?
Said I was endorsing bullying.
Well, I feel like Bill Gates probably was heavily bullied.
He was heavily bullied.
Why?
That's why he was very much.
He turned into a monster, right?
It's fine if people, you know, not every joke's going to.
But it's interesting to me that when I talk about, say, hollowing out the center of the United States to make it a gigantic child prison and then shooting children with darts from the air when they turn 18 and forcing them to work as accountants in San Bernardino.
I mean, I guess it's because more people experienced bullying than were hunted by with adults.
It's more frequent.
And also experienced.
And most people don't buy it.
And I didn't turn into that, right?
My response is, yeah, and most people don't like kids.
What was yours, Cody?
Oh, I was just saying also, like, most people that were bullied didn't turn out to be monsters.
Yeah, they did.
Like, I was bullied a lot as a kid.
Yeah, exactly.
That's why I made the joke.
Anyway, you can't say anything on the internet, Katie, without some group of people getting angry.
But definitely the thing that makes the most people angriest is talking about psychics or whatever.
That's just people go out of their goddamn minds.
Fuck you guys.
I was a dolphin.
Katie, I believe you were a dolphin.
Either you believe in things that you can't prove or you don't believe in things that you can't prove.
And to me, all things that you can't prove are the same.
Like Christianity, Islam, dolphins, like all in the same specter of like, yeah, whatever.
Like, I don't know about psychics, but I would like to believe in past lives.
Yeah, what does it hurt anybody?
I think that that's more comforting to me than the thought of God.
But anyway, this is not that conversation.
I mean, it's one of those things.
I tend to fall more in line with like the, with like the scientific side of things.
But also, I remember stories like the tale of Dr. John Brinkley, who was at one point a respected doctor who convinced a lot of people that the science said that all energy came from testicular secretion.
So you should shove this goat balls inside these goat balls inside your head.
What do you guys want, if anything, from this captain the episode?
All of it.
Every bit of it, Sophie.
Katie?
I don't know.
Every inch of it.
Let me think about it.
Okay.
Anyway, whatever.
Just remember when you think about whether or not, you know, science is the thing that you should put all of your faith in, that a lot of people used to think that this was science.
And maybe the only thing that you should trust is a hearty machete in your hands and a set of goat balls hanging underneath your regular balls.
Amen to that.
That's all you can really trust.
Inside your regular balls.
Maybe that's where he went wrong.
Maybe if you had them, because your testicles are outside of your body, maybe the goat testicles also needed to be outside of your body.
Right, right.
I feel like he's forcing, I guess, testicles into testicles, which is not a phrase.
Not at all phrase.
Because no one else but this man would do that.
Yeah, it's not a comp.
You'd hear that phrase and be like, wait, what?
What?
Yeah, you try to park your car into a garage that's too small.
It's like, ah, it's like shoving two sets of testicles into one testicle.
And you're like, yeah, it is like that.
Why did you say that?
I agree.
And I'm going to go now and I'm not going to come back.
But yeah, I feel like maybe just like getting the goat's testicles near testicles or something like that.
Yeah, like some sort of, I don't know, religious fetish.
Like you wear them around your neck or something to make you more virile.
Exactly.
Like a rabbit's foot.
Like a rabbit's foot, a goat's testicle just around your neck.
Exactly.
Perfect.
You guys want to hear about his method of transplanting the glands into a man?
I actually don't.
Okay.
I'm going to hear it anyway, Cody.
You can't stop this.
It's happening to you.
I can mute you.
His method of transplanting the glands into a man is by making two incisions in the man's scrotum under simple local anesthesia, a practice, a practically painless operation.
Oh, it looks practically painless.
God.
But from this point on, this is the same thing.
It virtually doesn't kill you.
It's fairly deadly.
No two cases are exactly alike, and Dr. Brinkley performs no two operations exactly alike.
This is the reason he explains why, with the best will in the world to teach his fellow practitioners what to do and how to do it, he is nevertheless unable to state in writing exactly what treatment to use to cover all cases.
That's good science right there.
It cannot be taught by correspondence, and simple though it sounds to hear it, it cannot be learned by attendance at a few clinics.
It is delicate in this sense, that it is not rightly performed in the individual case, the glands will slow.
That means loss of time, loss of temper, and the waste of a perfectly good pair of young goat glands.
Lost a pair of glands rotting away in your testicles.
Damn.
Oh, my God.
I really should have muted you.
Now Cody is clutching his ice pack like a teddy bear.
It's a blanket.
It's my security.
Clutching his ice pack.
Like a pair of animals' testicles, giving him virility and strength.
You hold close to your heart.
It's called energy, okay?
And we all have it.
All energy is ice energy, which is just frozen sex energy.
Look, what color is ice?
White.
What color is testicle secretions?
Also kind of a white-ish color.
So there you are.
That's why Antarctica is the sexiest continent, although not for much longer.
Another very important thing which his experiments have taught Dr. Brinkley is this.
The glands on being removed from the goat must be immediately placed in a salt solution warmed to blood heat, and they must be used on the human being, all caps now, within 20 minutes from the time they are taken from the goat.
You can't refrigerate them.
So, how do you do this?
You cut open the person, you let them sit, you get the goat balls.
You get them goat balls.
I mean, maybe you cut the goat balls off.
It looks like, I mean, I'm going to guess a guy like Dr. Brinkley, he can make that first incision in your balls in under 20 minutes.
All he's doing is professional.
All of these jokes and stuff, and like the horror of having duped people into doing this, but this is animal cruelty.
Brute, oh, yeah, for sure, Katie.
Absolutely, yeah.
No, this is for sure animal cruelty.
Unbelievable.
No, what he did was horrific.
He's foolish.
Yeah, he's a monster, absolutely.
But man, it's pretty wacky.
So, the more quickly after removal they're used, the more likely they are to take hold and grow.
Don't think that ever happened.
I don't know what I know about science.
Pardon the phrase.
I don't know if that's going to bear any fruit.
Yeah.
I mean, you can use pig hearts, right?
People can have pig hearts.
So, why not have, except for the fact, of course, I think with a pig heart, you're like, if I understand the surgery, kind of like weaving it in where a normal heart would so that like it blood flows through it and stuff.
And he's just kind of jamming testicles inside of a person.
I cannot believe that someone conceived a child after this.
Let it, you know, live.
I mean, I think his wife may have just fucked Dr. Brinkley.
Maybe.
Yeah, maybe it was like a, that was his ploy.
It's like, if I need to get it for a paternity test onto Billy Goat.
Oh, they didn't have those back then.
All they had was, yeah, looks like a baby.
That's got to be a goat, baby.
Look at how goats are.
Oh, man.
All the kids in his town growing up.
It's going by, bye, bye, bye.
Yeah, I mean, the baffling thing is maybe because of the weirdness of the time, the kids were like, I wish I had been born from a goat's testicles.
I've just got my dad's regular cum.
Yeah, you're right.
There could have been some of that.
Now, in his min cases, he sometimes uses one gland, sometimes two, sometimes the whole gland, just as it came from the young goat, sometimes a part of the gland only.
But he leans to the opinion that the gland of the three weeks-old goat gives the best results if used entire without trimming.
Sometimes he lays the gland upon the outside of the human testes, connecting part with part.
Sometimes he opens the testes by incision and lays the goat gland within the cleft.
Very often, there are adhesions which must be broken down before the goat gland can function rightly.
Very often, there are unsuspected hydra cells forming cysts in the testicular mass, which must be cut out, or there may be variocell requiring attention.
The patient suffers very slight inconvenience.
The local anesthetic is enough to dull the pain, even of this breaking down of the adhesions, so that it is at its worst no more than the pain of a toothache and lasts a very brief while.
Many of the patients converse with the doctor while the operation is proceeding.
The pain is negligible.
The doctor proceeds according to the condition, age, etc., of his patient.
He may litigate, that is to say, tie off the tubes that connect with one testes or the other, or both.
Oh my God.
So he does all sorts of weird shit.
I have my camera off because of the internet.
And you guys can't tell how anxious that just made me listening to all of this stuff.
Yeah.
Sorry, that was my big reaction right now.
Well, Katie, I've got something good for you.
The glowing letters on file of the doctor's office attest to this, this being the success of the treatment.
Here, for instance, is a letter from a man, 81 years of age, who says, I feel like a boy of 18.
This is something I have not known for more than 40 years.
The goat glands have certainly done the work for me, but I wish, doctor, you would fix it so that I could complete the sexual act.
Wait.
Wait a second.
What?
Pardon me?
Wait, did he just admit that he couldn't complete the sexual act?
Oh, okay.
It goes on to explain it.
Don't worry.
This completion of the sexual act is exactly the thing that is to be avoided in the case of these old men.
All animal energy is sex energy.
The conversion of this is that sex energy, the conversion of this sex energy into other forms of energy, physical and mental, is the aim.
And this aim would be frustrated if these old men were given the full power to do as they pleased with their newfound youthful vigor.
You cannot always trust them.
That is the purpose of the litigating of both sides to making the emission of the semen impossible.
The life force, then, having no other outlet, can do nothing but reinvigorate the entire system by pouring its precious fluids into the blood.
Avoiding Sexual Completion00:04:30
They're blocking you up.
They're giving you he's giving us when old people come in, he gives them vasectomies.
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
And he shoves a goat testicle in there, too.
Yeah, just for good measure.
Because you can't let them come.
You can't always trust them.
Did he mean the old person or the goat?
The old person.
You can't trust the old person not to.
Because they're going to have so much new horny energy.
Yeah.
You can't trust them not to fuck.
So you have to stop them from being able to come.
Boy, this is thrilling.
I feel like I have to point out that it is time for another ad.
If you want to, yeah, you know what else will tie off your vast deference and make it you incapable of ejaculation?
That is not how tying off the vast deference works.
But yes, these ads.
Listen to these ads and you will never come again.
That's that's the behind the bastards guarantee.
There's two golden rules that any man should live by.
Rule one: never mess with a country girl.
You play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
And rule two, never mess with her friends either.
We always say, trust your girlfriends.
I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of the girlfriends, oh my god, this is the same man.
A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist.
I felt like I got hit by a truck.
I thought, how could this happen to me?
The cops didn't seem to care.
So they take matters into their own hands.
They said, oh, hell no.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He's going to get what he deserves.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Laurie Siegel, and on Mostly Human, I go beyond the headlines with the people building our future.
This week, an interview with one of the most influential figures in Silicon Valley, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman.
I think society is going to decide that creators of AI products bear a tremendous amount of responsibility to products we put out in the world.
From power to parenthood.
Kids, teenagers, I think they will need a lot of guardrails around AI.
This is such a powerful and such a new thing.
From addiction to acceleration.
The world we live in is a competitive world, and I don't think that's going to stop, even if you did a lot of redistribution.
You know, we have a deep desire to excel and be competitive and gain status and be useful to others.
And it's a multiplayer game.
What does the man who has extraordinary influence over our lives have to say about the weight of that responsibility?
Find out on Mostly Human.
My highest order bit is to not destroy the world of AI.
Listen to Mostly Human on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate setting.
Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of my favorite musicians.
Over the past two seasons, I've had special guests like Dave Grohl, Leve, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name.
And this season, I've sat down with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more.
Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
You related to the Phantom at that point.
Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
Shari, stay with me each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I.
So come hang out with us in the studio and listen to Playing Along on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ego Modem.
My next guest, you know, from Step Brothers, Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and the Big Money Players Network.
It's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
I went and had lunch with him one day, and I was like, and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot.
I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings.
I'm working my way up through and I know it's a place they come look for up and coming talent.
Treating Barren Women00:15:37
He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet.
Yeah.
He goes, but there's so much luck involved.
And he's like, just give it a shot.
He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot in life.
Yeah.
Listen to Thanks Dad on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.
We're back and we're learning more about when Dr. Brinkley is going to let you come.
I mean, we hope soon, right?
Suppose now the case is of a man of 50 who is physically run down, married, and anxious to be the father of a child.
In such a case, if the man is physically sound, Dr. Brinkley will do one of two things.
After the transplantation of the new glands, he will either ligate one side permanently and allow one testicle to carry on the work of rejuvenation while the other can be used for procreation, or he will ligate both sides and say to the man, I am tying off both testes because you will need to rebuild for at least one year before you should think of becoming a father.
But I am ligating with linen thread, which does not dissolve.
And if you come back to me in one year from now, I will remove the ligatures, one or both, and you will then be able to procreate.
This is reasonable and wise talk, and the man makes no objection.
When the year of probation, as you might call it, has expired, the man returns to the hospital.
The ligature is removed, and he goes home in a couple of days.
These things are not fairy tales, but solid facts, amazing as they sound to you.
There are five goat gland babies today among Dr. Brinkley's patients that he knows of, four boys and one girl.
There are probably many more of whom he has heard nothing, for patients have a way of moving out of touch after a while.
That's good science.
Where do they go?
Why don't they want to talk to the doctor anymore?
Why call your goat ball doctor?
Come on.
Stay in touch.
He did such a good job.
Man, they're really admitting a lot of bad stuff in here.
Yeah, they definitely didn't see it.
But they don't know.
Yeah, they don't get it.
Yeah.
Chapter 3, The Practice.
Women.
So we got a lot of good information in this one.
This one's for the ladies.
Sophie, can we get a little bit of a little bit of mood music here?
No.
Like some smooth jazz or something for the ladies?
Okay, well.
Don't have to do it.
Dr. Brinkley's Hospital.
Okay, I'm going to say it every episode from now on.
Please don't.
At Dr. Brinkley's Hospital, a beautifully appointed private residence.
It is a comfort to women patients to have the doctor's wife, herself a competent surgeon if necessary, at hand during the actual operation.
Mrs. Brinkley administers the local anesthetic, or the general anesthetic, if that is what's called for, as it sometimes is.
While the bulk of the operations performed on both men and women are gland transplantations.
A diseased condition of tubes and ovaries has sometimes made a laporotomy necessary, and many major operations have been successfully performed in the white-enameled operating room.
At such times, a woman clings to the presence of a woman, and Mrs. Brinkley's kind and pleasant manner is usually sufficient to banish all nervousness.
In ordinary cases of gland transplantation into women, where the patient is in good physical condition with no disease of the organs, the operation is as simple as in the case of the man.
The speculum discloses the condition of the condition of the vagina, and the insertion of the new ovary is into the mucous membrane of the vagina, leaving the goat ovary about four inches distant from the woman's.
My God.
That's basically normal.
Sorry, that's the only response I can have to this.
Yeah, you got to jam a goat ovary four inches away from your regular ovaries, and then you're good to go.
The only incision made is a small one, so it's just a small one, one inch long and painless under low pressure.
Where is the incision inside your vagina?
Oh, painless.
Yeah, just a painless inch-long cut inside your vagina to allow the insertion of another animal's ovary.
Sometimes one ovary is implanted, sometimes two.
Invariably, the new ovary is trimmed to a reduction in size.
Invariably, it is implanted within 20 minutes of its removal from the nanny goat.
What, Cody?
Do three.
Why not three?
Why not four?
Why stop at two?
What is the problem?
That's too much vitality, Cody.
No woman can handle that much vitality.
Jesus Christ.
You want them to explode from sheer nanny goat energy?
I have to think that Jordan Peterson absolutely has read this.
This does scream of all of those fucking damages.
This is the entirety of Jordan Peterson's sex education, you know.
This is some real god bullshit complex stuff.
Like, oh, we're gonna.
Anyway, go ahead.
Cut that.
I'm rambling, Sophie.
No, no, no, Katie.
No, you're not.
And we're about to get the answer to a question that you had posed earlier.
So this is good.
Unfortunately for the goat, the removal of her ovaries usually costs her her life.
She mopes for a few days, refuses to eat, and dies.
She is always given.
She mopes.
She mopes for a few days after having.
Oh, gosh.
She's always given a general anesthetic, and the removal is painless at least, if fatal.
Just a painless, fatal operation.
It's fine.
Pursuing the conclusions drawn from this long experience, Dr. Brinkley has found that women derive more instant benefit from the glands than men with respect to their awakened enthusiasm, improved appearance, and recovery of feeling of poise and well-being.
Very noticeable is the change of figure which follows the implanting of the new ovaries in the case of a fat woman.
The change is equally marked in the case of a fat man.
A man of abnormal Normal weight, 250 pounds, lost 50 pounds in two weeks following the operation, during which time he remained at the hospital, feeling well and strong, but shrinking in girth amazingly.
When he left the hospital, his clothes hung off him in bags and full.
He was dying in the hospital, of course, he was.
Right, like, oh, yes, all these patients become very emaciated and after their bodies fight off the decomposing flesh inside all this weight.
It's an amazing cure.
Unbelievable.
It's the vitality.
Oh, Jesus.
Dr. Brinkley by no means asserts that the woman whose ovaries have been removed by surgical operation will grow two new ovaries after the transplantation has been made.
But he cites the case of a woman whose ovaries had been removed by surgical operation some years previous, the uterus remaining intact, in whom he implanted two goat ovaries, and whose period shortly afterwards returned on a four-day basis with a 28-day interval.
He does not say that the goat ovaries transplanted into the woman have grown new ovaries, but there remains the phenomenon of the renewed menstruation, and it is very difficult to account for.
Maybe she was just bleeding because, again, she had another animal's ovaries put inside of her body.
Maybe.
Perhaps that could cause bleeding.
I'm not an expert here, not like Dr. Brinkley.
I mean, do people with such vitality bleed even?
Like, if it works, then you were not going to bleed, right?
Yeah, you would just bleed come, right?
Exactly.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
Really hate that phrase.
Oh, Cody.
We've come a long way from one pump, one cream.
We have come a long way.
Because Dr. Brinkley would say that's not nearly enough cream.
No, he'd be like, why?
Also, don't watch.
If you've got cream, don't pump for the love of God because you're losing your vitality.
No pump.
Many cream.
No pumps.
All of the cream possible kept inside of you.
Oh, God.
Never.
In barren women, from a 28 to 35 years of age, in whom he has not found a disease but an atrophied condition of the ovaries, the transplantation has invariably been attended with success to the removal of the barrenness, the new glands evidently bringing about the development of ova.
Nor does Dr. Brinkley say that in the case of a man who has had both glands removed by surgical operation, the transplantation will produce new glands for the man.
And yet he has had two successes to offset several failures in this very result, without any clue as to why the success followed in the one case and not in the other.
What?
That's good.
That's good.
He said that the doctor has no idea why it worked once.
Sometimes you get new testicles, sometimes you don't.
Yeah.
One such case was at the hospital during the writers, the writer of this book's visit there in April.
She was a paralysis case, quite fat, unable to walk except for putting forward one foot at a time, supported by the arm of someone on each side of her.
She was driven to the hospital in an automobile, accompanied by her husband and daughter, from the farm 200 miles away.
Dr. Brinkley strongly urged her not to have the gland operation performed at all, but she insisted upon giving it a trial.
It is too soon yet to speak of the results in this case, but in Dr. Brinkley's view, it is asking too much of the glands to expect them to produce favorable results in a case of this severity.
Yet at this time, there was in the hospital a young woman suffering from dementia pracocks, whose mother had been watching over her for 12 years and on whom the affliction of her daughter had so weighed that she told the writer she wished God would take one or the other of them because it was more than she could bear.
This young woman has been confined to the state hospital for the insane and had been treated by specialists for many years without any benefit at all.
There was some homicidal media, much depression, and attempts at suicide.
She could not be left alone in her room for a moment.
But the day after the transplantation of the glands, this young woman embraced her mother and talked so rationally to her that she called in Dr. Brinkley and with tears repeated what her daughter had just said.
Dr. Brinkley advised her that the results were altogether too sudden to build upon.
There will certainly be ups and downs, he said.
You must expect good days and bad days when you will doubt if your daughter is any better.
But to make a normal recovery, she ought to show an alteration of good and bad days with a good day's growth.
Wow.
So, yeah, just this mom's daughter is suicidal, and I'm guessing it's because she has the kind of mom who would have a goat's ovaries shoved into her daughter in order to cure depression.
But the goat's testicle.
We're talking about science.
You need to have some valid theories that you can test out.
You can't just be like, well, maybe it's because of this obvious thing that's going on.
Now, Cody, I know what you're asking next, which is, can goat ball implantation stop you from aging?
Stop you from aging.
Yes.
Bring about immortality.
Yes, immortality.
I was going to ask you.
I was in the middle of asking you.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Quite a frequent style of inquiry from women to the doctor runs like this.
I am in good health and in every way normal, age 35.
I want to remain as I am and grow no older in appearance than I am today.
Do you think that the goat gland operation would keep me from getting any older?
To this kind of inquiry, Dr. Brinkley makes a stereotyped reply, something as follows.
If you are today in good health, I should not advise the goat gland operation, but would advise it in your case as soon as you have passed the change of life in 10 or 15 years from now.
To the writer, he said, I cannot conscientiously advise this woman to submit to this operation because I don't know that the glands would advantage her in any way.
They might or they might not.
I do not know.
It is therefore experimental work and cannot take her, and I cannot take her money for an experiment.
I must have something definite in the way of experience to go on.
There might be some evident condition of ill health to be set right, but on the other hand, okay.
So that's ethical.
That's ethical.
Yeah, that's good ethics.
You should when you're if you're still childbearing, as soon as you have menopause, that's when you're sick enough to get goat ovaries.
That's what menopause is.
It's a sickness.
Yeah.
Or maybe we've earned a right to not bleed every month.
Maybe we get to have sex without the fear of having a child.
Contrary to that, if you get a goat's ovaries inserted, then you'll keep bleeding.
Yeah.
That's good.
Yes, because you know, that's, and he's right, though.
I'm wrong.
That's what women want is to continuously be available to make babies in.
That's what Dr. I mean, yeah, that is what Dr. Brinkley thinks.
That's what he thinks.
He's, I mean, he's a great man.
That's what I've gathered from this.
Yeah, so obviously he's this next chapter, chapter four, Dr. Brinkley's own story, claims that he's got many cases, ample proof cases, that implementation of testicles to stare, goat testicles to sterile people allows them to bear children.
Already, the town is filling up with childless people waiting to be operated upon.
Incidentally, cases of insanity are cured within 36 hours after a simple operation.
Other diseases also disappear.
So that's good.
Wow.
Yeah.
Well, because clearly, if you can't bear children, you're going to go insane.
Yeah, for sure.
And the way to cure that is an animal's sex organs that you shove in where your own sex organs go.
How much more of this beautiful book do we have?
Well, let's look around and see what else we got in this.
I'm going to see if there's diagrams.
Please, no.
Oh, yeah.
There's some nice pictures of people.
No, no diagrams.
Okay.
Well, okay.
So we've got.
There's a lot of weird stuff here.
The goat reacts like human.
The goat alone among mammals reacts to poisons almost identically as human beings react.
And the poison gases of the war had precisely the same effect on him as the soldiers.
So 1,500 goats did their bit in the war in an experimental way.
These points in his favor and other similarities to man are the reasons which led me to select the goat as the best possible material for this work.
So that's, I hadn't, I was unaware that his reasoning for why goat testicles were the best testicles is that if you gas goats with chlorine gas, they die like people.
You know, you can't fault that science.
You cannot fault that science.
That's good science.
That should do it.
They die similar.
Okay.
So I'm finding here on page 38 that when you put male goat glands into men, all of their babies are boys.
And if you transplant female goat glands into women, all of the babies are girls.
That makes perfect sense.
Yeah.
Or probably.
He says probably.
He doesn't really know, but he's putting this in the book anyway.
Wait, wait, wait.
Yeah.
What does he probably know?
Because the women he implanted lady goat glands in hadn't given birth yet.
So he didn't know, but he was like, yeah, probably.
Wait, wait.
Uh-huh.
Lady goat glands into ladies.
Ladies.
Makes them give birth to baby ladies.
And male goat glands into men makes their child be okay.
Well, that's nonsense.
What if the male with the male goat glands fucked the woman with the lady goat gland?
If I'm not mistaken, that would create the birth of a sort of er-human blessed with powers of super sense and enhanced sight far beyond the kin of mortal man.
It would create like a kind of Vishnu creature who would be invested with all of the power of the universe, I suspect.
That's my guess.
Why didn't they ever try to put lady goat glands into men?
Well, because that would probably be right, Cody.
Yeah, that would leech your male sex energy and replace it with weak female sex energy.
Leeching Male Energy00:08:55
Okay.
Here's the hospital.
You can tell it's a good hospital because it looks exactly like a normal house.
I thought that was his house.
It is also his house.
He lived in the hospital.
I was going to say.
That's how you want to do it.
All right.
Well, I'm just going to scroll through this a little bit here.
Yeah.
Well, this is just a bunch of...
Oh, wait.
Yeah.
Here's a photo from the operating room at the Brinkley Hospital.
So there's a bunch of doctors.
All of those people, all those medical professionals are involved in inserting another animal's testicles into a human being.
All of those people fucking suck.
Yeah, all of those people are pretty trash.
Yeah.
Well, guys, I think this is about all we can reasonably about this book.
Oh, here's a picture of the goats.
No, baby.
Here's the picture of the goats that are going to be used for testicles.
Oh, how dare him.
Yeah, I mean, the people at least are making the stupid choice to do this.
The goats are just.
The goats had no say.
The goats are just the poor innocents.
Well, this has been very fun.
I learned a lot.
I learned a lot too.
I do think we should read something of Jordan Peterson's on here.
Yeah, yeah.
This makes me really, really hunger for Jordan Peterson's work.
Well, that's been our read through the goat gland transplantation by Sidney B. Flower, which I have to say, the cover of this book appears to be like a crude image of an old Greek statue.
And I think it's probably saying that the goat gland transplant will make you virile, like the ancient pagans.
Are you sure that's not just like a mangled goat gland?
Yeah, it's just a goat's balls.
Yeah, like smashed.
They've been removed from their skin.
Yeah.
That seems likely, Cody.
One or the other.
Cody, if you were going to insert another animal's organs into a human being, what animal organ would it be?
A human heart and a human heart.
Human surface.
That's not allowed.
Dolphin squeaker.
A dolphin squeaker.
Wait, wait.
Where would you put it in a person?
The balls.
In the balls.
You put the squeaker in the balls so that whenever people, whenever they come, it goes.
Or a baboon heart in balls.
Yes.
Oh.
Or, well, I guess like.
To pump extra blood into them.
Sure.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
I mean, any answer I give is going to be inside the balls.
So.
Okay.
I like the squeaker in the throat.
Or like, you know, yeah, some sort of echolocation in the throat.
Yeah.
But when I say throat, I mean balls.
I'm sorry.
I misspoke.
Balls.
Yeah.
Balls.
Well, guys, has this changed your life at all?
It's definitely changed the course of my afternoon.
This is mostly all stuff I learned in school.
So it's not.
Yeah, Cody, you famously went to school at Dr. Brinkley's Goat Testicle Hospital.
Yeah.
Which is why you can't read.
DBGH represent classes, whatever year that was.
Yeah, it's obviously there's more.
There are better updated textbooks about this topic.
Sure.
But this is a nice little refresher.
Like Dr. Jordan B. Peterson's Maps of Meaning.
Exactly.
It's all about it.
Which is maps of how the different meanings that will come into your life when you insert various kinds of testicles into your body.
Exactly.
Again, we've all read Maps of Meaning.
We all know.
We've all read Maps of Meaning.
We all know that that's what it's about.
The Goat Testicle of Chaos.
The Goat Testicle of Chaos.
Man, that's going into my next D ⁇ D campaign.
It's like the eye of Vecna.
More merchant possibilities all throughout the separation.
Oh, God.
Well, guys, that's going to do it for us here at Behind the Bastards.
Katie, Cody, do you exist on the internet in some fashion?
I don't know because I've just met you for the first time to record this podcast.
That's such a weird way to get to know someone.
I know.
If you are online, you can check out our other show with Robert, which is weird that we've met him before.
We record our parts, you record your parts, and we mix them up together.
This has been fun, though.
Maybe we should do it live sometime.
And our other podcast is called Even More News.
Cody, you do the rest.
There's a YouTube show called Some More News.
I am on Twitter.com and other of those kinds of sites as Dr. Mr. Cody.
And Katie is also on those sites as Katie Stole.
You guys know this.
Hell yeah.
Google the names and see the accounts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Social media.
I have a book.
You can find it in podcast form, in the audio form.
If you just look for After the Revolution, wherever there's podcasts, any place there's podcasts, you can find it.
Or you can find the text of the book and E-Pubs updated every week at ATRBook.com.
So check it out.
And remember, if you don't have enough energy, don't go for coffee like some sort of an idiot.
Grab another animal's testicles, shove them inside your body surgically, and gain the ability to birth goat children.
All energy is sex energy.
Don't do that.
energy is sex energy the motto of behind the bastards it is not worst year ever forever and always yep that's the episode yeah all right jesus behind the bastards is a production of coolzone media for more from coolzone media visit our website coolzone media.com or check us out on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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