Jacob Wohl orchestrates failed disinformation campaigns against Ilhan Omar and Pete Buttigig, soliciting $25,000 for baseless "Sharia police" claims while running a banned fake intelligence firm. Despite an FBI probe into his troll farm plans and fabricated sexual assault allegations involving Hunter Kelly, Wohl persists in seeking attention through disruptive press conferences and false election predictions. The hosts conclude that Wohl's incompetence and the lack of legal consequences for his racist stunts highlight systemic failures in addressing white privilege and political fraud within the American justice system. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Trust Your Girlfriends00:02:17
This is an iHeart podcast.
Guaranteed human.
When a group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist, they take matters into their own hands.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He is not going to get away with this.
He's going to get what he deserves.
We always say that.
Trust your girlfriends.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I got you.
I got you.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ego Modern.
My next guest, it's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
He goes, just give it a shot.
But if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of life.
Listen to Thanksgiving on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
On a recent episode of the podcast, Money and Wealth with John O'Brien, I sit down with Tiffany the Budginista Alicia to talk about what it really takes to take control of your money.
What would that look like in our families if everyone was able to pass on wealth to the people when they're no longer here?
We break down budgeting, financial discipline, and how to build real wealth, starting with the mindset shifts too many of us were never, ever taught.
If you've ever felt you didn't get the memo on money, this conversation is for you to hear more.
Listen to Money and Wealth with John O'Brien from the Black Effect Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.
On the Ceno Show podcast, each episode invites you into a raw, unfiltered conversation about recovery, resilience, and redemption.
On a recent episode, I sit down with actor, cultural icon Danny Trail to talk about addiction, transformation, and the power of second chances.
The entire season two is now available to bench, featuring powerful conversations with guests like Tiffany Addish, Johnny Knoxville, and more.
Talking About Buttholes Again00:02:39
I'm an alcohol.
I'm a guy.
Listen to Ceno's show on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast.
What's Grifton McConman?
I'm Robert Evans.
This is Behind the Bastards, a show where every week we talk about the very worst people in all of history.
And I also try out a new introduction.
This one was not as inspired as the other ones, for which I apologize.
I just couldn't come up with another what's boiling my pig anuses today, which is ironic because I boiled some pig anuses this morning to eat for breakfast.
Shireen, how are you doing today?
That sounds delicious.
I'm doing so good.
So good.
It is delicious.
You know, they're basically calamari.
So they're like kind of tangy and tender.
Tangy, tender.
Oh, you don't eat meat.
Well, boiled pig anuses are barely meat.
I mean, they're 80% vegan, I'd say.
We've already just the last episode we were on, we mentioned buttholes pretty late into the episode, but we're just right out the gate just talking about buttholes again.
Yeah.
Okay.
We're right out the gate, which, and you know, when you think about it, Shireen, right out the gate could even be a butthole reference.
Yeah, when you poop, what happens?
It goes right out the gate.
It goes right out the gate.
Into what's it called?
The ivory, ivory throne?
The ivory throne or the top, the hood of a cop car, wherever you prefer to go to the restroom.
Fuck the police.
I don't judge.
Or at least poop on their cars.
That seems a little bit less aggressive than fucking them.
Because, you know, consent and stuff.
Anyway, my guest this week is Shireen Lani Yunus, co-host of the ethnically ambiguous podcast, Cage Fighter.
And facts.
A fact.
You're a fact?
Facts.
I said fact.
Like, yes, I'm the co-host.
And yes, I'm a cage fighter.
It's facts.
Hashtag factor fighters.
Those are both facts.
Yeah.
Yes.
Listeners will be interested to know that Shireen only does recording sessions with tape around her knuckles covered in broken glass in case she needs to get into a cage fight.
Yeah, that's actually confidential information that I only shared with my colleagues.
So I'm glad you've shared that with the whole world now.
I guess my secret's out.
I'm a badass.
You do a lot of damage to the microphone stands.
So we've been having some issues as a result of all the glass on your wrists.
You know what?
I'm sorry.
I already paid back the office.
I gave them the money to repair the microbellon.
That's not my problem anymore.
You know, it's theirs.
Speaking of people who are everybody's problem, you know who we're going to talk about today, Shireen?
Jacob Woll Is A Badass00:14:32
I do.
Oh, I do.
We're revisiting an ex of mine that we talked about before.
We had an intimate but brief relationship a couple months ago where we both discussed him.
And now he's back in my life.
What can I say?
Now he's back in all of our lives because he refuses to leave.
Today we are talking about our dear friend and special boy, Jacob Woll.
Special boy.
What a special boy.
Punchable face.
When we last talked about Jacob, I ended that episode with a line.
As of this episode, Jacob Woll is still under investigation by the FBI.
He is also still on Twitter.
Now, today, in the year of Our Lord 2019, only one of those things is currently true.
Jacob Woll is no longer allowed on any social media, and we'll get to why in a little bit.
But first, let's talk about his trip to Minneapolis, Minnesota.
So, on February 13th, 2019, conservative grifter/slash filmmaker Ali Alexander created the Investigate Ilhan Omar Fund on his right-wing news and politics website.
I'm already on culture.
I'm already here.
You're done.
Well, does it change your mind to know that his right-wing news and politics website, Culture, spells culture with three T's?
The fuck?
Why?
I don't know.
You know, I assume that's a good idea.
Is it instead of spelling it with three K's?
Like, what's the.
Well, I mean.
I have a point.
I have a point.
You have a point.
Ali Alexander is not a white guy, so he can't be racist.
So, I mean, that's just that argument there is just wiped out immediately.
Yeah, he probably is.
So we should have no issues with the documentary he makes about Ilhan Omar.
That's true.
You know, you know, he probably doesn't see color.
He probably has a lot of good points of view that I need to hear about because his experience is just so much more valid than my own.
So I must listen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And his investigation of Ilhan Omar had no racial tinge to it whatsoever.
He just wanted to investigate to see whether or not she married her brother in order to immigrate to the United States.
I'm vomiting.
I am vomiting.
I'm vomiting.
Now, there was no evidence whatsoever, and has never been any evidence whatsoever to substantiate this claim.
However, Ali Alexander solicited $25,000 in donations to send a team to Minneapolis to investigate these claims.
That team wound up consisting of Jacob Woll and Laura Loomer.
Wow.
Dream team.
Strive for secrets.
He's a dream team.
Yeah.
If you're unaware of Miss Laura Loomer, she is a 25-year-old fake journalist most famous for badly handcuffing herself to Twitter's headquarters after being banned from that service for repeatedly harassing Representative Omar.
She was so bad at handcuffing herself.
When she handcuffed herself to the door, her goal was to stop people from entering Twitter.
But she didn't know how to operate handcuffs or doors very well, so she only handcuffed herself to one side of the door.
So Twitter employees were able to continue to enter and leave.
And when the police showed up, they asked Twitter, like, do you want her removed?
And they're just like, no, like, she can stay handcuffed to the one door.
Like, this is not an SNL skit or some cloud chum or bullshit.
This is our reality.
This is this dumb bitch.
Yeah.
So this is the team.
This is the dream team that Ali Alexander assembled to investigate Ilhan Omar's background.
As Loomer and Woll took to the streets of Minneapolis, they began to fill the internet with hilarious periscope videos of their adventures.
Here's one video clip of Jacob telling the world about the Sharia police, who he believes absolutely exist in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
Again, I can't emphasize enough, he's claiming this is happening in fucking Minnesota.
Now, if you're not familiar with Minnesota, you don't know how this works, but the Islamicist forces here have taken over sections of the respective police departments and almost everybody.
There's Sharia police in Minnesota now.
There are men who walk around in orange vests that say Sharia police in some of these Somali communities, and they are enforcing Sharia law.
And let me add, you're going to see all this in the video we're producing.
We've got two camera guys.
They're over here and over here.
And much more production crew, you name it.
Now, here's another clip of Jacob Woll and Laura Loomer talking about the massive security team they totally need for all of the dangerous Islamists that they say are absolutely following them around the streets of Minneapolis.
Do I have to hear this?
Yes.
Yes, you have to.
Okay.
We've got a top-notch security team here to get us around, get us from point A to point B. They're right here and right here behind the camera.
You can't see them.
And we've been going from point A to point B in convoy, you know, armored cars, you name it.
And, you know, we needed to, we were afraid that we were going to be tailed.
We were afraid that Ilhan, the jihadi Omar, would send somebody after us and tail us as we got out here.
Ilhan the jihadist Omar?
Are you shitting me?
My mouth is on the floor.
What the shit?
Also, also, behind the camera, they're sitting in a bathroom.
I can see the reflection of the light in the mirror in the door behind them.
There's nothing behind them but a fucking bathroom mirror.
There's no armored trucks or camera crew.
You're taking a fucking vlog for YouTube.
What the fuck are you?
Yeah, I wanted those back to back so you could hear them refer to their camera crew as just off-screen and their security crew as just off-screen in the same video because it's clear that they don't have any sort of team.
No.
Yeah, we all had fun.
Those of us who follow Jacob Woll on the internet watching the ridiculous videos they put out.
There was no evidence ever provided that his security team existed.
There was no evidence provided of Sharia police enforcing Sharia law in fucking Minneapolis.
Jacob Woll did show up.
Yeah.
Jacob Woll did show up at one point in a video wearing a fancy bulletproof vest, which was embarrassing to me because it turns out that we both own the same brand of bulletproof vests.
If I were you, I would never share that fact with anybody.
But that was brilliant.
It's not very brave.
I mean, it's a nice vest.
It's frustrating.
Yeah.
All that vest ever wanted to do was stop bullets.
Now, Woll claimed to have received numerous death threats while investigating Ilhan Omar.
And when the 23-minute documentary Importing Ilhan eventually launched on Colt Chair's website, it included a segment where Woll reported his death threats to the Minneapolis police.
That segment of the documentary is noteworthy because it included a close-in shot of one of the so-called threats, which read, I hope you fucking know that if I bump into you in Dinky Town or anywhere else in my city, I'm going to shoot you and shit on your fucking bodies.
Get the fuck out of my city, you piece of shit.
Now.
Now, Shireen, keep that threat in mind because it's going to be relevant again in just a minute or so.
But speaking of shit again, and where you shit, some people are into that.
Getting shot.
Some people are into that.
I think Jacob Woll might be into that.
Toilet play.
Yeah.
He wrote that death threat.
But we'll get to that in a second.
Now, I've been unable to watch a copy of the full documentary, tragically, because it's been pulled from the internet due to several crimes that Jacob Wohl committed on video.
I did find one breakdown of the film's claims against Representative Omar by journalist Tony Webster.
Here's his tweet.
Here's everything said about Ilhan Omar by interviewees in right-wing video that aimed to end her career.
I don't know much about her.
I met her twice.
She's held events.
She's had a lot of coverage.
She's okay.
She goes too fast, has to slow down.
And marriage allegation, just a rumor.
So, that's what the documentary actually included in terms of real revelations.
For a little while, Woll's trip to Minneapolis seemed like it might have been a competent grift.
Everything he said there was an obvious lie, and it wasn't going to do any damage to Ilhan Omar's career.
But he and Laura Loomer's claims that they were being hunted by Islamists and needed money to rent armored cars were successful in drumming up thousands of dollars in donation from gullible baby boomers who think Minneapolis is an ISIS stronghold.
Wow.
And then, on February 26th, 2019, USA Today published an interview with Jacob Wohl titled, This 21-Year-old Tweeted Lies About Robert Mueller and Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Now he's eyeing the 2020 election.
The article opened by focusing on Woll's latest lie.
Wait, hold on.
Jacob Woll is 21?
Yeah, now he is.
Yeah.
Wait, he's that.
What age would you guess?
I don't know why I thought he was way older than that.
Maybe his face just looks disgusting to the point where like a young man can't be that ravaged by disease and just filth, you know?
It's because being a gross criminal grifter ages you.
Like look at Paul Rudd.
Paul Rudd's like 55 and you wouldn't guess he's a day over 30 because I don't think Paul Rudd's ever been mean to anyone.
I think he's pure.
He's just pure.
Yeah.
Jacob Wohl is just a piece of shit and so he looks like he's in his 30s.
Yeah, I really thought he was in his 30s.
This baby just turned 20 fucking one.
I mean, how do you already said Laura Loomer's age, but I'm going to guess you didn't pay or you didn't know.
How old would you guess she is?
Yeah, how old would you guess she is by her?
Face on the video I just saw, also in like late 30s.
Late.
She's 25.
She's just no!
Actually, good for you.
Also, quick question.
So they were united after she hankuffed herself to the door.
They were not friends before, but he just like he was just like, we should reunite forces because we're both after the same charges.
Yeah.
I think he saw that.
And she also, she showed up on the lawn of Nancy Pelosi's house and got a couple of illegal immigrants that she paid to like pretend to be protesters arrested.
Also, after seeing the videos of them sitting next to each other, they are 100% fucking.
100% fucking they recorded that in their shared hotel room.
Sophie's making a thing at me.
I don't think his balls have dropped.
Sophie says that she does not think his balls have dropped.
While that is a valid point, pegging.
And probably true.
Bring it back to Peggy.
Actually, he's not smart enough to know how fun that could be.
But they are behind the corner.
I mean, Shireen, I think what this means is that you and I need to film our own documentary Spirit of importing Ilhan called pegging wool.
Oh my god.
Just investigate the very credible allegations we have.
Why have we missed it?
That he's been pegging.
We should definitely do pegging, but his name is Wool.
We should do shearing wool.
Like wool.
Oh, damn.
Like a fucking sheep, you know?
Yeah, and sheep.
But how does that relate to pegging?
We'll incorporate it in, you know, we'll incorporate it in somehow.
It'll be like the Trojan horse.
The Trojan horse of our documentary is the pegging, and it's going to be.
I just love a good pun, you know?
I love a good wool pun.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm trying to like a wool in sheep's butthole.
A wool in sheep's foe.
We'll work on this one.
Yeah, sorry.
We're going to workshop this next time.
We'll kick it around to our writing team and we'll get back to listeners.
Yeah, your people, my people, we'll connect.
Yeah.
We'll put together 25 grand and put up another documentary on Colta Tature.
Yeah.
Which I assume is how it's pronounced.
Every time you say it, I get more and more confused, but it's fine.
Yeah.
Now, that USA Today article opened by focusing on Jacob Woll's latest lie.
A claim that Kamala Harris was ineligible to be president because her parents weren't legal residents for five years prior to her birth.
That was a lie, like literally everything ever said by Jacob Woll ever.
Here's how the USA Today quoted the boy.
The believability stuck at about 15 to 18% by my measurement, Woll said in an interview shortly afterward, declaring it, not a bad campaign.
I love that you said the boy.
I like that.
That made me.
Yeah, I said the boy.
Yeah, yeah.
Quoted the boy.
Oh, he's a boy.
He is a child.
He's a boy child.
Yeah, he is a boy child.
Now, in that USA Today interview, Woll was happy, I would even say eager to explain the other grifts and cons he had in the works, seemingly oblivious to the fact that these kind of things don't fucking work if you spoil them.
Quote from USA Today.
He says he planned to create enormous left-wing online properties, such as deceptive Facebook and Twitter accounts, and use those to steer the left-wing votes in the primaries to what we feel are weaker candidates compared with Trump.
It's a plot similar to what Mueller has charged in indictment that the Russians crafted in an effort to boost the 2016 campaigns of Bernie Sanders and Jill Stein and Hobble Hillary Clinton.
Another stated scheme seeking to collect damaging information on left-leaning non-profits, including Media Matters for America, the Southern Poverty Law Center, and right-wing watch by offering their insiders moral reconciliation.
And if that doesn't work, things of worth, such as money, or perhaps these stated plans themselves are a ruse to fool the mainstream media, which Woll calls a band of lying goblins.
A band of...
That's a good band name.
Yeah, it is a good band name, Lying Goblins.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Now, it's funny to me that Woll refers to the mainstream media as a pack of lying goblins because minutes later in the same interview, he states that the accuracy of his statements is not the important part.
He claims truth is an obsolete concept and brags about the fact that he was wearing a gun to their meeting at a hipster coffee shop in Orange County because of all of the death threats he says he receives.
I hate him.
And he looks like a goblin.
He's a little goblin.
He does look like a little goblin.
If you were going to cast another Lord of the Rings movie, but you didn't have money for like props and prosthetics and stuff, you could just have Jacob Woll play all the goblins pretty well.
100%.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you know what?
That's a good use for Jacob Woll is having him play goblins.
Everyone has their calling, you know?
Some people just have to go to the house.
Everyone discovers their calling.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He should get out of politics and get into playing a goblin in Peter Jackson movies.
Casting Jacob As Goblins00:02:23
Yeah.
I mean, Smeagel made it, made it, made a big deal, you know?
Like, he's out there crushing it, you know?
Oh, yeah.
No, he's doing great.
Yeah.
No, Gollum owns that sweet ass house in the Hollywood Hills.
I think he's dating Cheryl Teagues, right?
If I'm not mistaken.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Interesting children that will come from that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Uh anyway.
Yeah, go ahead.
Sorry.
I was gonna say something, but I plumb forgot.
Do you remember from our last episode how Jacob Woll loves to make claims about things he's overheard in hipster coffee shops?
Oh my god, yes.
Please do tell me.
One example of those tweets would be this October 2018 tweet.
I was sitting in a hipster coffee shop in downtown LA this morning and couldn't help but overhear the six college-age women seated at a table who are clamoring with excitement and joy over the confirmation of Judge Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court.
So just in case you haven't listened to the other episode, that's the kind of claims Jacob Woll would make about the things he overheard in hipster coffee shops.
USA Today asked him about this.
Quote, Woll explained that he picks on bohemian coffee shops because he sees them as the temple mount of liberalism and calculated that if you in any way impugn the sanctity of the hipster coffee shop, it's going to be something that gets them really charged up.
In describing his methods, Woll casually explained that he makes it up.
I'll literally hear one thing and flip it 180 degrees.
That's just lying, but I think he's fine with that.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's garbage.
What do you think the Starbucks order is?
Maybe like skinny, non-fat vanilla, two pumps of what do people I don't drink coffee.
I don't know.
In the USA Today interview, he just had a cup of water, I think because he might be.
Wow!
He's one of those fuckers that goes to a coffee shop and just drinks water and sits there for hours and hours.
I think so.
I get that feeling from Jacob Woll.
Wow.
I also get that feeling that he has a delicate constitution and coffee might hurt his tummy-tum-tummy.
Aw, what a poor baby.
What a poor little baby.
You know who's not a poor baby, Shireen?
Uh, ad sales.
The sponsors and/or solicitors who solicitors have like a negative connotation.
I want to say solicitors.
Do I think it has a negative connotation to it?
People put no solicitors on their doors sometimes, but I don't really know what the word means.
You solicit.
I mean, I solicit lots of stuff, but not at doors.
From Addiction To Acceleration00:03:43
Yeah, true.
Okay, sorry.
I'm distracting you from your main goal here.
Products!
There's two golden rules that any man should live by.
Rule one, never mess with a country girl.
You play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
And rule two, never mess with her friends either.
We always say, trust your girlfriends.
I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of The Girlfriends.
Oh my God, this is the same man.
A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist.
I felt like I got hit by a truck.
I thought, how could this happen to me?
The cops didn't seem to care.
So they take matters into their own hands.
I said, oh, hell no.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He's going to get what he deserves.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Laurie Siegel, and on Mostly Human, I go beyond the headlines with the people building our future.
This week, an interview with one of the most influential figures in Silicon Valley, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman.
I think society is going to decide that creators of AI products bear a tremendous amount of responsibility to products we put out in the world.
From power to parenthood.
Kids, teenagers, I think they will need a lot of guardrails around AI.
This is such a powerful and such a new thing.
From addiction to acceleration.
The world we live in is a competitive world, and I don't think that's going to stop, even if you did a lot of redistribution.
You know, we have a deep desire to excel and be competitive and gain status and be useful to others.
And it's a multiplayer game.
What does the man who has extraordinary influence over our lives have to say about the weight of that responsibility?
Find out on Mostly Human.
My highest order bit is to not destroy the world with AI.
Listen to Mostly Human on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate setting.
Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of my favorite musicians.
Over the past two seasons, I've had special guests like Dave Grohl, Leve, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name.
And this season, I've sat down with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more.
Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
He related to the Phantom at that point.
Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
Share, stay with me each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I.
So come hang out with us in the studio and listen to Playing Along on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ago Moda.
My next guest, you know, from Step Brothers, Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and the Big Money Players Network.
It's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
I went and had lunch with him one day, and I was like, and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot.
I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings.
I'm working my way up through and I know it's a place they come look for up and coming talent.
He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet.
Exposing Fake Twitter Accounts00:15:30
Yeah.
He goes, but there's so much luck involved.
And he's like, just give it a shot.
He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat.
Just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of luck.
Listen to Thanks Dad on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
We're back.
We're back.
We're talking about Jacob Woll in his USA Today interview.
Now, USA Today also spoke with Carolyn Cass for the article.
Miss Cass is the woman that Woll and his partner Berkman claimed had been assaulted by Robert Mueller.
Cass claimed that she'd actually tried to hire Woll when she believed him to be a legitimate private investigator.
She paid him $2,000 to help her with unscrupulous characters ripping her off and then was apparently promptly ripped off by Woll himself.
He wrote up a fake list of allegations.
Like a pre, like a teenager.
I don't understand.
She didn't know he was a teenager.
He used a different name.
He called himself Cohen and she only met him on the phone up until they were already like in business.
Yeah, I'm going to guess she was not the most careful person, which is probably why she got ripped off by other people.
But, you know, if you're Jacob Woll and you're putting out Craigslist ads saying that this is the business you're in, you might get some people that you can take advantage of.
Not that she deserves to be taken advantage of, but I'm going to guess that's kind of what happened.
Yeah.
Okay, sorry.
Yeah.
So Woll and Berkman, his partner, immediately ripped Cass off.
They wrote up a list of fake allegations and docu-signed it with her name.
According to USA Today, she claimed Cohen tried to get her to Cohen, which is Wool, tried to get her to speak at the news conference, but she escaped and learned only as the scheme exploded that Cohen was in fact Wool.
He completely lied to me, Cass said.
So that's cool.
Now, make a notice of the fact that she said she had to escape from Wool and Berkman, because this will not be the first time somebody makes a claim, or the last time somebody makes a claim like that in this episode.
Oh, no.
Now, yeah.
The most impactful reveal in that USA Today article was that Jacob Woll bragged at length about creating fake Twitter accounts in order to help spread his lies.
This was a clear violation of Twitter's terms of service, and it did not take long for reporters, namely NBC's Ben Collins, to identify some of these fake accounts and publicize them.
Woll was banned from Twitter within hours of the USA Today article's publication.
In classic Jacob Woll fashion, he pretended this clear and hilarious failure on his part was actually yet another victorious move in his endless 39-dimension chess game.
Here's Woll being interviewed by fellow grifter Ali Alexander for another video on culta ta-ta-chair.
Number one, this could not have happened at a better time.
Jacob Woll is number one trending on Twitter right now, and I'm promoting a press conference, and now people are going to go to that press conference, and it's going to be even bigger and better than we even thought.
I mean, it's going to be brimming over with people.
It's going to be brimming over with people.
So I'm glad it happened now.
I think that's perfect.
The other thing that I'm glad about is luckily because I was expecting this, I have set up myself to make a living in a way that doesn't require Twitter because that would be very fragile.
And I want to be, as Nassim Taleb would call it, anti-fragile.
So this isn't going to affect my living as it has with some other folks, but the pattern is clear.
Laura Loomer investigates Ilhan Omar, banned.
Jacob Engels investigates and tweets about Ilhan Omar.
Banned.
Jacob Wool finally gets the goods and puts on a press conference.
Banned.
But I can promise you one thing.
Ilhan Omar is going to be rocked by what we're going to release on Thursday.
The halls of Congress are going to be rocked by what we're going to release on Thursday.
And it will be number one trending on Twitter.
So Twitter can say whatever they want.
So that's what Woll claimed in the aftermath of that.
Now, a little bit of a spoiler.
Ilhan Omar was not rocked by any of his allegations because there was no evidence behind them.
Oh, press conference.
I could have seen that one coming.
She wasn't rocked.
Yeah.
The press conference did not attract a huge audience, but something fun did happen.
See, when that USA Today article dropped, reporter Ben Collins exposed one of Woll's fake accounts, as I already stated, a fake account for a guy named Drake Holmes, who was supposed to be a Minneapolis-born and raised diversity coordinator because Woll wanted to make fun of diversity, I guess.
In this fake account, fake Drake misspelled his own last name in his Twitter account.
Not long after the revelation that Drake Holmes was, of course, Jacob Woll, Tony Webster, another journalist, realized that the death threat shown in the Importing Ilhan documentary had been filed by Drake Holmes, aka Jacob Wohl.
Now, this is a crime.
You can't file fake death threats against yourself and report them to the police.
Or you can, but it's illegal.
So Jacob Wohl, by admitting in an interview that he made fake threats and then creating incredibly obvious fake Twitter accounts and then using those incredibly obvious fake Twitter accounts that he bragged about to threaten to murder himself and then going to the police with it, had committed an incredibly obvious and very well-documented crime, which is just a hoot.
Is he going to get any repercussions for this crime?
That's a great question.
Or is he still making fucking YouTube vlogs?
What's the...
Yeah, that's what we're going to talk about right now, actually.
So it does seem like he might actually eventually face some real repercussions.
Young Turks journalist Ken Klippenstein filed a FOIA request for documents pertaining to Shearfire Intelligence, which is the fake intelligence firm that Woll created to slander Robert Mueller.
The FBI refused Ken's records request and gave the excuse that they couldn't give him the records because those records pertain to an ongoing criminal probe, which means there's an FBI criminal probe going on into Jacob Wohl's fake intelligence company and his attempt to slander special counsel Robert Mueller.
Meanwhile, Jared Holt, another journalist who covers the far right, quote-tweeted Klippenstein's thread about his FOIA denial letter and noted, funny, I got a similar response from the state of Minnesota, which means there's an ongoing investigation into Jacob Woll's activities in the state of Minnesota for the fake death threats.
So it does seem like the wheels of justice might slowly be turning towards Jacob Woll getting in trouble for committing constant incompetent crimes.
Ever so slowly.
Ever so slowly.
Not fast enough.
No.
Now, February was a crowded month for Jacob Woll.
It ended with yet another press conference from him and Jack Berkman.
This one at CPAC, the annual gathering of conservatives and people who want to oggle conservatives in a safe, well-lit building.
By this point, Woll's grifts had become obvious enough that CPAC barred him from doing any event at the conference itself.
So instead, he and Berkman held their press conference in the busy lobby.
Nothing really happened at the conference.
Laura Loomer screamed that she and Woll deserved to get their Twitter accounts back.
Jacob Woll tried to claim that the Mueller investigation was done with and everyone should instead focus on their investigation of Ilhan Omar.
The journalists in attendance, however, just wanted to know if he was being investigated by the FBI.
For my money, the highlight of the event was a man in an ill-fitting suit Woll had paid to pretend to be a bodyguard wearing a single Apple AirPod in his ear to pretend that he had like one of those Secret Service things going on.
Wow.
Wow.
That's fucking funny.
Jacob Woll loves hiring fake bodyguards.
That's pathetic.
Also, it's obviously an AirPod.
Like, it's not good.
We all know what they look like.
Yeah.
Jacob Woll is a perfect example of a very dumb young man who thinks that because he's incapable of thinking at a higher level than his own brain works at, assumes everyone is as dumb as he is, which is very dumb.
So Jacob Woll would be fooled by someone wearing an Apple AirPod in one ear pretending to be a Secret Service type agent.
Wow.
But sadly, no one else is.
Well.
Now, for about a month or so after this press conference, it seemed like Jacob Woll might be fading into obscurity.
But then, in late April, the Daily Beast published an article revealing his latest scam: an attempt to slander Democratic candidate and mayor Pete Buttigig with sexually assaulting a young man who was too drunk to consent.
So, another false rape allegation, which is what cool people do.
I think he is unable to be forgotten about ultimately.
Yeah.
He doesn't want to go into obscurity.
That's not his deal.
He's like, even though that video was like, I don't want to be on Twitter anyway, because I want to be anti-fragile.
Also, like, a dumb word.
But he misses Twitter so much.
Can you imagine like Donald Trump being banned from Twitter?
Like, no, these people thrive on their dumb opinions, just like thwarted into the air.
And he, if he doesn't have Twitter, he has to be in the media somehow.
And that's just his whole fucking shtick.
That's his lifeblood, you know?
That is like, it's all about attention for him.
That's the only thing that he cares about.
To the point that, like, that's part of why none of his grifts really work in the long run, because he's incapable of thinking things out.
Like, Roger Stone would probably be down to file fake sexual assault allegations against someone, but he wouldn't do it twice in a year after the first one explodes.
He would be more canny about it.
He'd spend more time setting it up.
He'd make it harder to catch, and he wouldn't immediately commit the same grift like five months later after the first one failed.
Because he's just a little bit smarter than that.
Like, he's not smart, but he's a little bit smart.
But also, like, maybe he wouldn't even have been the face of it.
You know what I mean?
Like, he doesn't need like the fact that Jacob Wool needs to be the face and the person that's coming out with this news is just indicative of a personality that needs attention more than anything else.
He's not looking for the truth or anything else.
He wants to be this face of revelation and bullshit.
You know, yeah.
Yeah.
He wants to be facing down a bunch of press guys dressed in a suit.
He wants to feel like an FBI agent, but without like the airport or investigating anything.
Yeah, like he, there's all these pieces of other careers, like politics and journalism and law enforcement that he wants to, and like it, the finance industry that he wants to have.
But the only pieces he wants of them are like the public-facing pieces that he's seen in movies.
He doesn't in none of the jobs that he wants to do does he actually want to do the work.
No.
Keep in mind, he, I mean, has he gone to any type of schooling or anything to accomplish any type of actual, I don't know, like he's just a rich kid like flaunting around as much good money.
He's just a rich kid whose dad is like a lawyer who advised Donald Trump on stuff, who wants to do shady, gross politics stuff and doesn't actually want to work hard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's Jacob Wool.
Yeah, what a man.
What a man.
What a man.
What a mighty good man.
Now, the fake allegations against Pete Buttigig blew up in Wool's face because the young man they picked to make the allegations, a Republican himself, went to the Daily Beast with recorded audio of Woll and Berkman trying to convince him to lie about a sexual assault.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
The guy recognized Woll immediately and was like, well, I got to take this meeting, but I'm just going to record everything they say and go to a journey.
I like this guy.
I like this guy already.
Yeah.
I'm all right with this guy.
Quote, the source who spoke to the Daily Beast said Berkman and Woll made clear that their goal was to kneecap Buttigig's momentum in the 2020 presidential race.
The man asked to remain anonymous out of a concern that the resulting publicity might imperil his employment, and because he said Woll and Berkman have a reputation for vindictiveness.
So, several days before the Beast article could run, a young man named Hunter Kelly published a post on Medium alleging that Pete Buttigig had assaulted him in February of this year.
The post was tweeted by a Trump advisor and by Jacob's dad, David Woll, and wound up on Big League Politics, a right-wing political conspiracy website.
Journalists instantly recognized some things that looked pretty spishy about these allegations, like the fact that Kelly's Medium and Twitter accounts were both less than a month old, and that the main person he'd interacted with on social media was Jacob Woll.
Can you be more obvious?
Are you shitting me?
He's so bad at this.
He's so bad at this.
Like, it almost upsets me.
It almost upsets me that someone with that much money and connections can't get one thing right.
Like, not a single aspect of any of this right.
Like, there's terrible guys like Paul Manafort who you look at and you're like, they're monsters, but at least like most of the things they've done worked.
Like, this guy is just an idiot.
Like, he's a moron.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He doesn't deserve any part of his wealth or any part of his entitlement or privilege.
Like, he is he's just stupid.
Yeah.
He's stupid.
You can say about Roger Stone and Paul Manafort, they don't deserve their wealth or their success that they've had, but they at least deserve to be famous because the things that they've done have had an impact on history.
Jacob Wohl is like that person without ever having an impact.
He's done nothing but like give journalists something to giggle over.
He's just flailing.
He's flailing for attention.
Yeah, it's pretty sad.
Now, that doesn't mean I'm going to stop laughing about him because I need some to laugh about.
And this really wipes the payday loan stain out of my mouth.
So we're going to keep going on here.
The Daily Beast managed to track down the real Hunter Kelly, who said that the accounts created in his name were not under his control.
He eventually posted a message to his Facebook timeline titled, I Was Not Sexually Assaulted.
Quote, To keep it brief for now, I was approached by a political figure to come to DC to discuss political situations from the standpoint of a gay Republican.
When I arrived, they discussed Peter Buttajig and started talking about how they would be working a campaign against him.
I went to bed and woke up to a fake Twitter at RealHunterKelly and an article that I in no way endorsed or wrote.
I have since left and am working on a formal statement to give to everyone, including the Buttajig family.
Kelly claims that Wohl and Berkman basically flew him to D.C. and then printed up a fake statement they wanted him to sign.
They then posted the statement without his permission.
According to the Daily Beast, quote, he went on to say that they also tried to get him to sign off on a script for a press conference over his protests, but he called his family to come get him and then fled.
So this is the second person that's felt like they had to flee the presence of Jacob Woll and Jack Berkman.
Now, what's interesting to me is that both of the men Woll and Berkman tried to con into reporting Buttajig were Republicans, Trump supporters even.
It seems that Woll and his partner just sort of expected that their fellow conservatives would be down for any kind of grift that hurt Democrats, even if it meant implicating themselves in an obvious crimes concocted by idiots with a history of having their crimes instantly exposed.
The audio recorded by the Daily Beast source gives some insight into precisely how Woll tried to sell these young men on engaging in a criminal conspiracy to falsify rape allegations.
Selling Criminal Conspiracy00:04:23
Quote, when the source expressed reluctance, they assured him the scheme would make him wealthy, famous, and a star in Republican politics.
Woll cited the national recognition given to Christine Blassey Ford after she accused Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh of sexual assault during his confirmation hearings last year.
The source did not agree to participate in the scheme, but Roll followed up with a phone call a day or two later to see if he could recommend friends or associates who might be a good fit to play the victim in the hoax.
Wow.
I do want to bring up the fact that in our previous episode about payday loans, when they were trying to con the economist to write that article about them, in their response email, they promised fame and everyone's going to be knocking on your door or like whatever.
Like, that's all, that's their ploy.
Just like, you're going to get so famous from this.
Also, Christine Walsey Ford was fucking like crucified by the media.
That was the thing.
Yeah, I can't imagine, I can't imagine a worse kind of fame to get than the goal that she had.
It's like, it seems like it was an unspeakable nightmare for her and her family, which shows the kind of person Woll is.
Because I really don't think, I think he was telling the truth in that he believed that she got famous and it was a good thing, because I think he's incapable of seeing any kind of attention as bad.
And she did get a lot of attention.
And so that's all he sees.
Bad press is still press in his mind.
Yeah.
So he sees this woman being attacked by the entire right-wing media ecosystem and like the president of the United States.
Everyone knew her name.
So that's jealous of her.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Which there's a core of something deeply sad and depressing there.
Very pathetic.
It's very pathetic.
Given the world we live in, I'm not for a goddamn second going to feel bad about Jacob Woll.
I'm just going to laugh about him to, again, clear the worst bastards out of my head while we talk about this.
So the Daily Beast looked into the phone number that Woll called from.
It traced back to a company, Potomac Intelligence Group, which claimed to be a political and corporate intel firm, just like Surefire Intelligence.
Minutes after the Daily Beast reached out to Woll about Potomac Intelligence, the website was taken down.
So, if you know anything about Jacob Woll, you know, a little thing like repeatedly being revealed as a fraud wasn't going to stop one of his grifts.
Woll and Jack Berkman next announced a press conference.
It would be hosted in the driveway of Berkman's house in Northern Virginia.
Two days before the event.
Yeah.
They've gone from like a holiday inn for the Moeller one to like the lobby of CPAC to a driveway?
A driveway?
These fucking stupid fucks.
These stupid, stupid fucks.
Two days before the event, Berkman tweeted a link to an Eventbrite page called Protest Against the Homophobic Bigots.
This was apparently an event organizing page for a protest against the press conference being hosted by Jacob Woll and Jack Berkman.
Berkman claimed that the page was evidence of a real plan for hundreds of leftist protesters to disrupt their super important press conference.
We will not surrender to the mob.
We've called an extra security to guard our safety and that of our partners in the media.
Now, Will Sommer, the journalist who's probably done the most to cover Wool's various grifts, noted that, quote, before Berkman's tweet, no other Twitter account had promoted the event page.
Another reporter, Jason Duckman, found that the Eventbrite page had been started by someone using the email address woolthinktank at gmail.com.
Wow.
It gets possible.
Stupider and stupider.
Just try to cover your tracks.
Just try.
Make a fake email account, Jacob.
Do you know how many fake emails accounts I've made to get like a 10% off discount on like some fucking new site or something?
Like, it's very easy to make an email account.
Very easy.
It's incredible.
It takes seconds, Jacob.
Like, it takes seconds.
Come on, man.
God, this is just upsetting.
Yeah, it's frustrating.
When Woll was confronted about this, he claimed, I've never used Eventbrite in my life.
It was created by a troll.
We're going to get to the rest of this story, but first, you know what's not an incredibly lazy and instantly spotted grift, Shereen?
Making Fake Email Accounts00:03:58
The products that sponsor this show.
Sponsors.
Yep, sponsors.
Sponsors.
Not grifts at all.
In fact, products that actually deliver a service.
Yeah, we need them.
As a fellow podcaster, I get it.
Just support your hosts.
I love a product.
I love a service.
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There's two golden rules that any man should live by.
Rule one, never mess with a country girl.
You play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
And rule two, never mess with her friends either.
We always say, trust your girlfriends.
I'm Anna Sinfield, and in this new season of The Girlfriends...
Oh my God, this is the same man.
A group of women discover they've all dated the same prolific con artist.
I felt like I got hit by a truck.
I thought, how could this happen to me?
The cops didn't seem to care.
So they take matters into their own hands.
I said, oh, hell no.
I vowed I will be his last target.
He's going to get what he deserves.
Listen to the girlfriends.
Trust me, babe.
On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Laurie Siegel, and on Mostly Human, I go beyond the headlines with the people building our future.
This week, an interview with one of the most influential figures in Silicon Valley, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman.
I think society is going to decide that creators of AI products bear a tremendous amount of responsibility to products we put out in the world.
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You know, we have a deep desire to excel and be competitive and gain status and be useful to others.
And it's a multiplayer game.
What does the man who has extraordinary influence over our lives have to say about the weight of that responsibility?
Find out on Mostly Human.
My highest order bit is to not destroy the world with AI.
Listen to Mostly Human on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate setting.
Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of my favorite musicians.
Over the past two seasons, I've had special guests like Dave Grohl, Leve, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name.
And this season, I've sat down with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more.
Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
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Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
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Share each day with me each night, each morning.
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So come hang out with us in the studio and listen to Playing Along on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
What's up, everyone?
I'm Ago Moda.
My next guest, you know, from Step Brothers, Anchorman, Saturday Night Live, and the Big Money Players Network.
It's Will Farrell.
My dad gave me the best advice ever.
I went and had lunch with him one day, and I was like, and dad, I think I want to really give this a shot.
I don't know what that means, but I just know the groundlings.
I'm working my way up through and I know it's a place they come look for up and coming talent.
He said, if it was based solely on talent, I wouldn't worry about you, which is really sweet.
Ruined By Foul Behavior00:14:48
Yeah.
He goes, but there's so much luck involved.
And he's like, just give it a shot.
He goes, but if you ever reach a point where you're banging your head against the wall and it doesn't feel fun anymore, it's okay to quit.
If you saw it written down, it would not be an inspiration.
It would not be on a calendar of, you know, the cat just hang in there.
Yeah, it would not be.
Right, it wouldn't be that.
There's a lot of luck.
Listen to Thanks Dad on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
And we're back.
So, on the literal day I wrote this script, Jacob Wohl and Jack Berkman held their very important press conference in Berkman's very impressive driveway.
The proceedings were interrupted several times by a garbage truck emptying Berkman's trash and by several low-flying airplanes, which is why most professionals do not host press conferences and driveways.
Woll and Berkman refuted the claims that they had basically kidnapped Hunter by pointing out that they bought him a Starbucks frappuccino and an expensive haircut.
What?
Yeah.
They then segued seamlessly to stating that they were investigating Joe Biden and Elizabeth Warren.
In Biden's case, they think he might have Parkinson's.
They invited all 2020 candidates to submit themselves to investigations in order to gain the sure-to-be-coveted Woll Berkman seal of approval.
That's literally what they referred to it as, is the Woll Berkman Seal of Approval.
Which I can't imagine anything more prestigious.
No, I can't.
That sounds really legit.
It does.
Like all their press conferences, this one fizzled out with nothing of value having been presented.
The closest thing to a scoop was the ominous claim that Berkman's home would be the center of the 2020 election.
His home.
Yeah, he claimed his home was going to be the center of the election.
That's the most egotistical shit I've ever heard.
Of the 2020 election.
Your house.
Yeah.
My driveway.
My lawn.
God, fuck off.
If, like me, you're wanting to know exactly what Jacob Woll and his bumbling sidekick have planned for 2020, I have some good news for you.
A few days before Wohl's latest grift collapsed in on itself, a document was leaked to the Daily Beast, a brochure for something called the Arlington Center for Political Intelligence.
Bill is a conservative political intelligence and advocacy organization.
The ACPI claimed to be able to impact political outcomes for the benefit of conservative candidates.
As you've surely guessed by now, the Arlington Center for Political Intelligence is really just Jacob Woll.
Of course.
In this document, which was essentially an attempt at raising funds for his new company, Woll claimed that ACPI would, among other things, operate a troll farm a la the Internet Research Agency, infiltrate their operatives into Democratic campaigns, and execute high-impact publicity stunts to insert stories into the mainstream media.
That all sounds like things Woll is capable of doing.
And he just doesn't know when to stop or how to stop.
He's addicted to grifting.
He's addicted to grifting and also terrible at it.
Yeah.
Now, Wohl claimed that the ACPI needed $1 million in funding from investors in order to carry out its important mission.
The document went out to lay out a number of plans, obviously cribbed from Russian actions laid out in the Mueller report.
Woll wants to use bot networks to build large accounts that pose as leftists and then tell people at the last minute not to vote in 2020.
That's actually a plan he laid out, was to like pay bots to build fake leftist Twitter and Instagram accounts and then tell everybody on like November 1st not to vote.
Wow.
That's his brilliant scheme.
Yeah.
Damn.
Yeah.
He notes that this strategy was utilized by the Internet Research Agency with moderate effectiveness in 2016, but with a superior handle on American cultural nuances, ACPI will be able to have a devastating impact on Democratic candidates.
So basically like, because we know that social media exists, we're going to use it.
That's all that means.
Yeah, and what's really funny to me is that he repeatedly references the Internet Research Agency, but then like kind of slams them for not understanding American culture and stuff and be like, we'll be better than them because we know America better.
When it's like, dude, the Internet Research Agency succeeded in all of its goals and you have fucked up every single grift you've ever tried to carry out.
Don't pretend you're better than the Russians at this stuff.
Like they gotta wait with it.
No.
Just the sheer level of ego on display.
No.
I want to know what a day is like in Jacob Woll's life.
Like I want to know if he puts on a shirt being like, today's the day.
Today's the day everyone respects me.
Today's the day people see me as a serious political operative.
That day will never come, Jake.
I'm so sorry.
I'm not.
So sorry.
Because you're garbage.
Now, in the document, Wohl claims to have invented a totally new method of spreading fake news, which he calls feeding it up the chain.
He lays it out in a really long and complex flowchart, but the whole thing boils down to lying to people about having damning stories and then hoping that you get mainstream media coverage from stoking rumors.
So basically, he wants attention.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, exactly.
It's kind of sad but revealing in the document that Wohl is incapable of seeing anything but virality as a measure of success.
I'm going to quote from a chunk of the document.
With the advent of and popularization of live streaming via Periscope, Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube, it has become possible to synthesize manipulated events that garner enormous amounts of attention.
A textbook example of this tradecraft took place on November 29th, 2018, when right-wing activist Laura Loomer handcuffed herself to Twitter HQ in New York City after being banned from the site.
The stunt became the number one trending topic on Twitter and resulted in hundreds of articles being published and countless minutes of cable news coverage being broadcast around the world in a calculated move.
Loomer selected New York City as the place to execute the stunt, where journalists are plentiful and able to quickly arrive at the scene to broadcast the event on Periscope and Facebook.
Within 15 minutes of handcuffing herself to the doors of the Twitter HQ, Loomer was surrounded by dozens of mainstream and alternative media journalists who were broadcasting the event, namely on Periscope, to hundreds of thousands of people.
Within the first hour of the stunt, Laura Loomer was the number one trending topic on Twitter worldwide.
So he sees Loomer's actions at Twitter HQ as a huge success because it was popular.
It gets hard.
Like that whole thing that turns him on to be like, whoa, she went to a place that had so much media coverage or whatever.
Also, I can't get over the fact that she described it as an activist.
Like, that's activism now.
Like, oh, God.
But, um, and like, the attention wasn't people getting angry that she'd been banned and demanding that Twitter reinstate her because that didn't happen.
It was just everyone laughing at her for like 10 minutes and then moving on with their lives because it was funny.
Like, that's the thing where it's like, Jacob, in that, like, everything that he says in this document is something that, like, actual bad actors have done successfully to influence politics in America and elsewhere.
The ideas aren't unworkable.
They're just dumb because Jacob is dumb and can't pull any of them off and doesn't understand the difference between Laura Loomer handcuffing herself to Twitter HQ and being laughed at and the Russians mounting a campaign to artificially inflate the popularity of third-party Democratic candidates like what's her fucking name?
The Jill Stein in order to draw votes away from the Democrats.
Like one of those things is debatably effective.
The other one is just a joke.
But he doesn't see all he sees is that they both got attention.
Jill Stein got attention.
Laura Loomer got attention.
So that's the same thing.
His mind is one-dimensional.
His mind is truly, it cannot compute complex thought.
Yeah.
So 2020 is going to be fun.
I mean, no, it's not.
2020 is going to be the worst year of all of our lives.
So Wollmore 2020?
Is that what we're saying?
I'm just excited for what they're going to grift next.
Right, right, right.
Laura Loomer's going to strap herself to something.
I'm going to guess that Jacob Woll will accuse every single Democratic candidate of sexual assault by the time the year is over, which should be a lot of fun.
I can't wait to see who shits on whose chest, you know.
Oh, I'm looking forward to who shits on whose chest.
I hope we get to see Jacob Wohl arrested by the FBI for crimes, but I'm not holding my breath.
I think what he's done is so laughable.
It's definitely crimes, but I feel like the American justice system does not take him seriously because it's so laughable.
And as well, because I mean, we're laughing at him too, but the reality is there's still crimes, and he has not been faced with any type of justice or any type of like the reason why he keeps doing it is because no one is stopping him.
Yeah, he's faced no consequences other than like, I mean, his life other than being a grifter is over.
Like he, at this point, like there's nothing else he can ever do with himself.
Jacob Woll can't go back to college and get another job doing something legitimate because we have hours of him being Jacob Woll.
It's the same thing with Laura Loomer, where like Laura Loomer is famous right now for screaming on Infowars that her life is ruined because she's been kicked off of all social media and stuff for all these insane and racist stunts she gets up to.
And it's like, yeah, your life is ruined because you ruined it by doing fucked up things to people.
Like it's like a rapist being like, well, my life is ruined now because I'm a convicted rapist.
And it's like, yeah, your life is ruined, but like you raped people.
Like, don't you shouldn't have done that.
Like, you raped people and you got caught, which is what they're probably thinking is because they got caught.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, you accused a random woman of being a terrorist repeatedly and were partly responsible for huge numbers of death threats being filed against her.
That's libel.
You can't, you're not allowed to do that.
But you didn't.
No one gets in trouble.
Like, no, this is actually an instance.
Yeah.
That's what's aggravating is that they don't learn the real fucking lesson.
And you have to be pretty bad as a right-wing grifter these days to get banned from Twitter.
Like, that should tell you how bad Laura Loomer and Jacob Woll are.
They got banned from, like, Paul Watson's still on fucking Twitter.
The fact that they have not, like, that they managed to get, like, forced Twitter to take action means that they were pretty egregiously violating the service's rules.
And in Wool's case, he was literally bragging about breaking Twitter's rules to a journalist for a major outlet.
And it's like, yeah, dude, of course you get banned.
Like, I mean, it better be permanent forever because part of me is kind of upset because our last episode that we did, we got like pretty good attention from, I feel like Jacob Wool retweeted us and like commented.
The Krassensteins.
Oh, they are the ones.
Nothing they've done recently has been interesting, so I'm not going to talk about them more.
But we did get to slam the Krassensteins directly, which was satisfying.
It was satisfying because they were just all over it.
Yeah.
But I mean, Jacob Wohl and Laura Loomer, it's truly just an example of white privilege at its worst because nothing happens.
Like, if they were any other ethnicity or nationality or anything, they would have way more attention legally.
And that's the truth.
Like, I.
Oh, absolutely.
Without a doubt.
And because they're just rich white folk, they get untouched.
And that's what's infuriating is because white, for lack of a better word, like white-collar crime or whatever you want to call it, it's not like.
Let's just say white-skinned crime.
Yeah.
Like, I don't even know if this counts as white collar.
Like, I'm not sure what kind of collar repeatedly faking rape allegations is like, I don't, I really don't know.
Like, they've invented a new kind of white crime, and it's despeakable.
Yeah.
I will say, speaking of the Krassensteins and Jacob Woll, one of my favorite moments on Twitter last year was Ken Klippenstein, the FOIA journalist with Young Turks who revealed that the FBI had an open investigation into Wool, got into a fight with him on Twitter.
And Jacob Woll mistook him for one of the Krassenstein brothers because their last names are vaguely similar.
Oh my God.
And so Wool was like, why don't you just get up to another grift with your brother?
And Klippenstein responded, you know, the only difference between you and the Krassensteins is their grifts don't immediately explode in their faces.
And then Brian Krassenstein responded by just saying, boom!
Wait, what?
Yeah.
Oh, it was really good.
Wow.
It was one of those moments that makes Twitter worth it.
Yeah.
So he liked low-key admitted to grifting better than I think he was just too dumb to really know what was going on in the conversation and just saw that somebody had attacked someone attacking him.
Like, I really don't think he understood what was being said.
But Ken Klippenstein is a great follow on Twitter.
So check him out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not he not any relations.
He is not a Krassenstein.
Yeah.
Completely different last name.
Yeah.
Wow.
Wow.
Anyway, that's the episode, Shireen.
Well, thank you.
You're better after the payday loan stuff.
No, I'm still mad, but I'm always mad.
My default is just anger.
But thanks for having me on to revisit our sheep and wool's clothing.
He's just a dumb little sheep.
He's just a dumb little sheepy sheep.
The sheepy sheep.
It's almost insulting to sheep, honestly.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to tar sheep with that brush because sheep provide so many useful things.
Yeah.
Wool.
And they're kind of cute.
Yeah.
Sheep's milk.
Yeah.
Sheep's oil.
Yeah.
Cleansing The Soul Palate00:02:54
And they're concrete, I think.
Genuinely, I think they are more intelligent than Jacob Wool.
I have never seen a sheep fuck itself over in the same fashion that Jacob Woll has.
No.
Usually they just eat plants and mind their own fucking business.
Huddle together for warmth in the winter.
Yeah.
Which is a more successful strategy than Jacob Woll has ever executed.
No.
Wow.
What a shit show.
Well.
What a shit show.
Got some pluggables to plug?
Yeah.
Follow the podcast that I co-host, Ethnically Ambiguous, and listen to us.
We talk about Ilhan Omar a lot, especially with the recent stuff that's been going on and why everything against her is pretty much a facade.
But you can follow us at Ethnically Ambiguous or Ethnically Ambig, A-M-B-I-G on Instagram, Ethnically AM, A-M-B on Twitter.
You can follow me at Shiro Hero on Instagram and Shiro Hero666 on Twitter.
It's S-H-E-E-R-O-H-E-R-O.
Yeah.
And thanks for having me, Robert.
This was splendid.
Even though you're not in the same room as me, I feel like we've bonded today.
We have bonded today, and there's only one thing that can seal the kind of bond that is built over listening to Jacob Wool stories, and that is the celebratory role of bagels.
See, when you've been working together as long as Sophie and I have, you just know what the other person wants.
Her hand.
Sophie, I'm going to yell in anger, and you throw the bagels when I give my angry bagel throwing.
I'm going to try to get the sound on my mic.
Okay, go.
Okay.
Yeah.
That was a pretty good sound.
That was good.
Yeah.
Perfect.
Oh, my God.
I'm so satisfied with how that went.
Yeah, I'm happy.
I mean, not really, but you know, the bagels have made me happy.
Yeah, that's the beauty of throwing bagels.
They really cleanse the soul's palate.
They cleanse the soul's palate.
A good baked good will do that, you know?
That's why they call baked goods, because they're good.
That is why they're called baked goods.
They're not baked bad.
Speaking of baked bads are.
Well, actually, baked bads are when I try to make baked goods because they usually get high and forget that the oven's on.
That is bad.
It's not a great strategy.
Speaking of great strategies, I'm not making an ad plug.
I don't know why I use my ad plug, boys.
You can find me on Twitter at iWriteOK.
You can find this podcast on Twitter and Instagram at BastardsPod.
You can find us on the internet and find the sources for this episode at behindthebastards.com.
You can buy a t-shirt at PeePublic.
I have a sad podcast about doom and the horrible civil war that awaits us all called It Could Happen Here.
War Awaits Us00:02:40
Check it out.
That's it.
That's the episode.
Until next time, I love about 40% of you.
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