I've never asked myself, who am I? Jews don't do this.
They know who they are, especially when confronted with a challenge to their identity.
I once took a walk through Times Square, and when tempted to feel lost in the crowd, a young fellow with his pals shouted at me,''Hey Rabbi, doing some sightseeing?''''I'm not a rabbi,'' I answered.
''Rabbis don't wear crosses.'' But you look so Jewish, he answered back.
What does a Jew do with this?
Does he blush? Get nervous?
Get hostile? I simply smiled and continued my walk that was soon interrupted by another encounter.
After giving me the evil eye, a Jewish guy gets in my face and said, We don't want you here in New York, you anti-Semite.
I've seen your videos and I'm going to shut you down.
I made the sign of the cross over him, tried to stay calm, and went back to the hotel.
There I did a little self-examination.
I'm still a Jew, I said to myself, even though I believe in Christ.
It's inescapable, since I do look Jewish.
How could it be otherwise? My mother once traced our family tree back eight generations, all Jews.
Hers from Russia, my father's from Austria, Hungary.
Am I then an anti-Semite, I thought?
How could I be?
I'm not against myself nor anyone because of their race.
For racially, I'm a Jew.
But religiously, I'm a baptized Orthodox Christian.
Once baptized, a Jew crosses the line.
He's now on the other side.
Do I think like a Jew?
I then ask myself.
Well, how do Jews think?
Basically, everything is filtered through the lens of us and them.
Woody Allen shows this in Annie Hall.
Sitting at a Thanksgiving meal with Annie Hall's Gentile parents, he's suddenly transformed into a Hasidic rabbi.
It's funny, but brings out the us-and-them Jewish think, especially when Goyish culture throws one's Yiddishkeit into stark relief.
Do I think like this?
Sometimes in church, I'm in the Russian Orthodox Church, I get the feeling that some Ruski is looking at me and saying, what's this Yid doing here?
Maybe I'm paranoid, but this is a Jewish thing.
Now, in my self-examination, a kind of light bulb came on.
The essence of Orthodoxy, I thought, is otherworldliness.
If anything smacks of this world, then the Orthodox Christian instinctively combats it.