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Dec. 29, 1999 - Bill Cooper
56:18
Martian saves the World
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This is hour of the time.
Yes, I am a good approacher. But better yet, I'm a sissy.
I'm a good approacher.
see you.
I don't know what this is.
Man, look around.
This looks really... I don't know.
It looks... What is this?
Oh, I got that, yeah.
Oh, man, that looks like... I know what that is.
And then I think I...
Hey, this is something really... I'm glad I found it.
I'm really glad I found it.
I'm glad I got here.
Look at this.
I can put the whole story right here.
This, this is a place where somebody makes records of things that happened with their voice.
I can tell it.
I know what this is.
I've never seen it before, but I know what it is.
That one right there.
That one that's got something in it.
Let me take a good look at this.
What is this thing?
Oh, I know what that is.
That's the thing that you put the voice on.
And I'm going to put it right in here.
I'm going to do that right now.
I don't know what any of this stuff says.
it work here. Ah, okay. I get it. Now, I've got to play with this thing a little while.
It's evening. Oh, now, the light came on, and there's a weird language here. I don't
know what any of this stuff says. Must be some kind of ancient civilization artifact
stuff. And that's what I saw up there today.
Those were the collections for the solar energy running down here to make this work.
There ain't nobody around.
I looked for really good all day long after the crash and I was hurting and bleeding and crawled up out of that hole in the side of the mountain and got into this place.
Not before I'd fight this big black beast, though, which took a chunk out of my leg.
But I'm going to leave this record for the future.
Whoever, if there is, any who, and any ever, ever get to listen to it, I think.
I think what I'm doing is putting my voice on this thing.
And if that's what I'm doing, then I hope somebody gets to hear it someday.
Because I'm the only one left, you see.
Ain't nobody else.
I flew around this planet a couple times the last few days looking for signs of life.
I didn't see any.
And I don't know.
And I don't know if there's anybody left.
I tried to get here as quick as I could.
And I've been traveling for so long.
Long time, you see.
Long time.
I've been just flying through the universe trying to get here.
Because I knew it was going to happen.
I knew it was going to happen.
I knew it was going to happen.
Because it happened.
It happened to us a long time ago.
And I've come from a long time ago.
I've been traveling a long time from way in the future.
And I finally got here.
I didn't know how to work this darn thing, though.
And it was a hell of a mess, I got to tell you.
Tore up the whole place out there.
I'm lucky I can still talk.
I'm going to tell you the story of what happened to us.
I used to live on this planet, you see?
Not this planet, but this other planet.
And, uh, it's a red planet.
In fact, you can still see it if you, you know, if there's anybody alive that ever gets this message.
You can, you can see it.
You look up in the sky.
Because I seen it tonight.
It's up there.
It's red.
I don't know what you call it.
I don't know who you are.
I don't even know if you are.
I don't know if I'm the only one left.
I might be the only one left in the whole universe.
See, we had a We were a great civilization of ancient peoples.
And we finally came to grips with all the things that plagued us and hurt us and made us hate each other and war and all kinds of things.
We finally came to grips with all of that.
We knew what the answer was.
It was something really, really far out, man.
It was far out, man.
The first time I heard about it, I was blown away.
I was blown away.
I was amazed.
The whole concept was just so far away from anything anybody ever understood that it was amazing.
It took a long time for people to really understand it and grasp it and know.
And no, you know, you know what, man?
It was hard.
It was hard.
But when you got it, when you got it, when you got it, when you really, really got it, when you got it, when you got it, when you really, really got it, then you really, you really, you really got it.
Well, I don't know what you'd call it.
I don't even know if you are going to understand what I'm talking about, but we called it freedom.
Freedom.
Now, what we did, man, was we set everybody free.
We set everybody free.
We set them free.
We set them free.
I was free, man.
Nobody bothered me.
And I didn't bother nobody.
I, after a while, didn't even know how to bother nobody.
I was having such a good time just being free.
Then I could do or say anything I wanted, anytime I wanted, anywhere I wanted, as long as it didn't hurt anybody else.
It was wonderful.
The hardest people to convince, though, were the We're these, uh, these dudes, you know, these guys that, uh, these guys that were always just, uh, tellin' people what to do, makin' them do stuff and manipulatin' and, and grindin' and shootin' and warrin' and, and rapin' and pillagin' and stealin' and, and, uh, and, um, and, and, and lots of stuff that, you know.
I don't know, man.
I don't know, man. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
But even they, you know, turn around once they got a taste of it.
And it created this society that was so far out, man.
It was weird and wild and crazy and cool.
And fun and serious and everything you can think of all at one time.
And it was a blast.
It was the greatest thing that ever happened to any of us.
I worked in this place, you see, my job was to clean this big long hallway, that's all I did, all day long, just clean the hallway, clean the hallway, shine the hallway, wash the hallway, I cleaned my buckets, I cleaned my broom, I cleaned my mop, I cleaned the hall, that was my job, and I was proud of it, and I had my, you know, I had my rewards for that, you know, and there was never another hallway in the whole world looking as good as that.
And I was free.
And I knew I didn't have to do it.
And that's why I did it so good.
I did it better than I ever would have ever done it because I was free to do it or not to do it.
And so I did it.
I did it good.
I did it better than anybody ever dreamed it could ever be done.
And it was clean, man.
And I walked by these rooms.
And sometimes the door would be open.
And I'd hear these people talking.
Real important people.
They'd be in there talking, man.
Talking and planning things and getting ready, you know?
But I wasn't supposed to go in those rooms because I didn't have whatever it was you're supposed to go in.
Sometimes, you know, I'd get interested in the conversation.
I'd walk, hey, hey, hey, hey, anybody want to go for a cup of coffee?
Oh, man, you should have seen them.
They'd get all excited and throw me right out of that room.
They had nothing to do with freedom, you see.
It was their job, you know, what they were doing.
What they were doing was trying to come up with an answer for what they knew was going to be the end of everything.
They knew a secret, you see, that nobody else knew.
They wasn't, and nobody knew it, but me.
I was cleaning the hall, you see?
I was cleaning the hall, and I walk up and down this hall with my broom and with my mop and with my buckets and all my sponges, and I be dusting and all this kind of stuff, and I hear them talking in those rooms.
And I heard it.
Everything was going to come to a stop on a certain day because somebody forgot to program something in a computer.
Well, I didn't know what no computer was.
I didn't have nothing like that in my closet.
I went back and looked just to make sure.
You know, I had all kinds of good stuff in there.
I had clean and powder, and I had clean and soap, and I had clean and liquid, and I had my box, and my brooms, and my sponges, and my rags, and some towels.
Had all kinds of stuff in there.
Had two kittens and nails and stuff like that.
Looked all over.
Couldn't find nothing.
Nothing that even... I didn't even know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
But there was nothing in there that I didn't know what it was.
And it wasn't no computer.
I can tell you that.
But I was getting scared, you see.
Because I kept hearing all the whispering and carrying on in these rooms about this stuff.
And they wasn't telling nobody.
And I thought, maybe I better tell somebody.
Maybe I better tell somebody when I go home tonight.
I'll tell them there's something wrong with the computer.
And so I did.
I went home that night and I was walking on the street and I saw this man sitting on the curb drinking out of this bottle, you see.
So I sat down beside him and I said, did you hear the news?
He said, No, man, what news?
What are you talking about?
Here, you want a drink?
I said, Well, don't mind if I do.
And I took this paper bag.
It had a big bottle inside.
I took a drink.
Oh, boy.
Oh, man, that was some of that really good stuff from the southern polar region where there's a hole that goes into the hollow center of the planet, you know.
And it was, and they got these, these real, real nice, weird looking people got fourteen knives and six legs that make this stuff.
But it's good.
And I took me a swallow and I says, there's something wrong with the computer.
He said, what?
I said, man, there's something wrong with the computer.
He said, what computer?
I said, I don't know, man.
I don't know.
I don't know.
That's the problem.
I don't know.
I just know there's something wrong with the computer.
He said, well, what are we going to do about it?
I said, well, why don't we have another drink and talk about it?
I said, have you ever seen a computer?
He said, no.
He said, have you ever seen one?
I said, no.
He said, well, what's this computer thing?
I said, I don't know.
I don't know, but there's something wrong with it.
He says, how do you know this, man?
Why are you trying to scare me like this?
I'm getting scared.
Something wrong with the computer.
I said, well, I don't know, man.
I just, I work, and I keep the hall clean, you see?
You see, I keep this hall clean, and I just clean it, and it's so, it sparkles, and I'm so proud of this hall, and I walk up and down, and I clean it, and I clean it, and I pass these doors.
He said, doors?
What doors?
The doors, man.
There's doors all along this hallway.
And there's people in these doors.
And they're important people.
And they know things, man.
And I heard them say.
I heard them talking about it.
There's something wrong with the computer.
He said, give me back that bottle.
He took that bottle away from me.
And he didn't want to talk about it no more.
So I got up and walked down the street some more.
I saw this girl.
Oh, she was a pretty young thing, she was.
And I stopped her and I said, did you hear the news?
And she said, what news?
There's something wrong with the computer.
The computer's all messed up, man, and we gotta do something about it, because everybody in the rooms is talking about it.
I said, what room?
The rooms!
All along the hallway, there's rooms, man!
And I'm walking up and down, and I'm cleaning, you see?
And I'm buffing the floor, and I'm cleaning, and every little, I see a little speck over there, and I go over to get it, and it's right by the door, and I hear them talking, and they're talking about something wrong with the computer.
And I don't know what's going wrong.
I think something's wrong with you, man.
Why don't you go away and leave me alone?
So I did.
I went home.
I didn't stop anybody else.
I wasn't having any luck, you see.
I went home and I went to bed.
And all night long I dreamed about something was wrong with the computer.
And in my dreams I could see this thing, you know.
I knew what it was in my dreams.
I mean, it was pretty.
It was a pretty thing.
And it was big.
Yeah!
Yeah it was big and it was pretty and it showed movies on the side and served drinks and all kinds of things and if you wanted to you could push a button and the food would come out right in your hand and it was a great marvelous thing but something was wrong with it.
I woke up in the morning and I got dressed and I went back to work and I looked down the hallway and all of a sudden, all of a sudden, all of a sudden I don't know man!
I don't know, I don't know, but the hallway didn't look the same to me that morning.
It looked strange.
It was scary and I was scared of my own hallway where I was so happy and took such pride in my work and I started to go to my closet and get my cleaning things out and change my clothes and put on my work stuff and I just didn't feel like doing it.
Because if something was wrong with the computer, man, if something was really wrong with the computer, what was the use of doing it?
You know what?
Why was I going to do it?
But I got my stuff out and I went to work, because that's all I knew.
I didn't know nothing else.
And I started cleaning the hall.
And I'd get close to the doors.
And I tried not to get close to the door because I didn't want to hear anymore, man.
I didn't want to know.
I didn't want to know.
And I don't know.
You see?
That's the whole problem.
I don't know.
One day, this fella come out and he looked at me and he says, you know, he says, you really do a good job on this hall.
I said, well, thank you.
Thank you, sir.
He said, you do such a good job on this hall.
He said, where did you learn how to do this?
I told him I just do it because I wanted it to be the best hallway in the whole world.
On the whole world.
I wanted anybody that came in that hallway to just feel so good and clean and safe and comfortable in there.
That's why I've done it.
And he said, he understood that.
He asked me if I wanted to go on a long trip.
I said, what do you mean?
He said, we need somebody to save the world, man.
And we need somebody just like you that knows how to keep a hallway clean and is really proud of it.
Somebody who can Take warning and tell people that all this complicated.
See, you don't know nothing about all this, do you?
And I said, no.
He said, you ever seen a computer?
I said, no.
He said, did you ever drive a Robin Hood jetknot boat?
I said, no, I never drove one of those in my whole life, man.
I don't even know if I ever seen one.
I walk to home and walk to work in the morning.
He said, do you have a transponding picture originator in your house?
And I said, no.
I don't even have a house.
I just have this little room, man.
He said, you're the one.
Because you know what it's all about.
I said, man, you must be mistaken.
I don't know what it's all about.
I just told you.
I don't know nothing.
I don't know anything about this stuff.
I ain't never seen no pewter.
Never seen none of this stuff.
I never drove nothing.
I never heard of what you're talking about.
I'm supposed to have in my house the picture originator.
I don't know nothing about them.
He said, that's good.
That's good.
You're just the man for the job.
I didn't know what he was talking about until just a little while ago, you see.
He took me out to this place and he showed me this big, giant, oh man, it was like this mural pointing up into the sky.
He told me this was, this is a, a, a, oh man, I don't want to, cause, and I don't, I don't remember, I don't remember, I don't know.
It was big, and it was long, and it pointed directly up in the sky, and it had all this smoke coming out of it, and all kinds of stuff, and everything was, was really strange, I gotta tell you.
And I looked up there, and I couldn't even see the top.
The top was poking up in the clouds.
It was big.
He said, you're going to go on a trip.
And I didn't know.
I didn't know.
I didn't know.
I didn't know what he was talking about.
But he wanted me to go on some trip.
And he told me it was important.
And so if it was important, I was all ready, you know.
And I went home and packed my bag.
I came back and he looked at my bag and he said, you won't be needing that bag.
I went to my closet and I got my toolbox and all my cleaning stuff and my mops and my brooms and if I'm going to take a trip, I better take this stuff, you know, so I can clean the hall.
I ain't got to have a hall where I'm going.
I'm going to clean it.
I'm going to keep it clean.
He said, looked at me and he says, you ain't going to be needing all that stuff where you're going.
You see?
You're going to save the world.
I said, what?
He said, you're going to save the world, man.
You are the one.
The one what?
You know, all kinds of things going through my head.
And mostly carrots and cabbage and things like that because I was hungry and I didn't know what he was talking about.
And I'm eating my brooms and my buckets and all this stuff behind.
What would I do?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know what I'd do without him.
That was my life, you see.
And I told him, I said, that's my life.
What am I going to do?
He said, that's why we're sending you on this journey.
Because you know what to do.
You know exactly what to do.
Nobody else knows what to do.
And he told me that, and I was so confused.
I was confused.
I didn't know what to do.
I didn't know what he was talking about and I started wondering if there was something wrong with him, you know?
But he was an important person and people came down the hall and they stopped and, you know, and they talked to him very seriously and called him sir and got out of his way and all kinds of things like that.
He said, of course, you know, you're a free man.
You don't have to go.
You don't have to clean this hall.
I said, I know it.
I know it.
I said, tell me something.
Look at me.
Tell me something.
Is this really, really important?
He said, it's very important.
It's the most important thing you're ever going to do in your entire life.
Now, I don't know if anybody's ever going to hear this.
And I don't know whether I'm late or if I'm on time.
I didn't see no signs of life nowhere.
And I've come such a long, long way for a long time.
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know how long it was, but it was a long time.
A long time ago, way in the future is when I left.
You see?
And I've come to save the world.
Not my world, you see.
It was too late for my world.
I couldn't save my world.
My world was too far advanced, you see.
Everything, everything, everything, except my little room in my hallway.
It was technocraticized and computerized and dipped to Toulouse and electrified and it was, you know, on this wire fried and everything was connected together and the high bone in the feet and the, you know, the toes sticking out of the thing and everybody was, you know, playing with these little buttons and all kind of stuff and you couldn't go five feet without bumping into all these things and it was too late, you see?
They knew it.
Long time ago in the future, they looked across this big gulf out there, you know, this highway that I've been traveling
on.
I didn't even know it was there.
I never looked up, no how, didn't even know what was out there.
I didn't know you guys was here, if you're here.
I still don't know if you're here.
I don't know if I'm in time.
When they looked down and they saw this planet, Thank you.
And they knew there was people living here.
They saw things.
And they heard things with these gadgets they got.
And he told me this story.
He said, they knew there was people here.
Like us.
He said, hell, the people on that planet might have even come from here.
They might be.
And that's why you gotta save the world, you see?
So there'll be somebody left.
One day they took me in this elevator ride up to the very top of this thing, and I walked
out and it was all pretty and metal and shiny and clean.
If somebody there was like me, because it was all clean and pretty and shiny and everything
smelled fresh and clean, and they opened this door and inside of this big, giant needle
somewhere up near the top we were in the clouds, you see, and I couldn't even see down to the
ground.
But I knew it was a long way, because that elevator took a long, long time to get there.
They told me, go ahead, go in, get in there, and then take a look around and sit down and
see how it feels.
So I did.
I got in there and I looked around.
There's buttons and switches and lights buzzing and blinking and going off and little things that you could see on the screens and stuff and pretty soon I was mesmerized and I forgot to sit down and I was looking at all this stuff.
Then I looked around to see if there was any windows, and there were a couple of them, little bitty round windows.
And I felt better because I could see out of them things, you see.
I didn't know later.
I didn't know!
I didn't know!
I didn't know later.
It didn't make no difference.
Couldn't see nothing out of them things anyway.
So, then I sat down in this big chair.
Man that was the most comfortable chair I ever sat in in my whole life and I sat there and I leaned back and it just oh it felt so good and it just sort of it just sort of just sort of rolls up around my body while my body just sort of sank down into it.
That chair felt so good that I didn't want to get out of it.
I didn't want to get out.
I didn't want to get out of it.
I wanted to stay there.
And he told me, that's good you like that chair, because you want to be sitting in that chair for a while, you know?
I said, no, I don't know.
I don't really know.
I'm just, you know, if this is a good thing to do, then I think I might do it.
Next thing I know, in the morning, no nothing, they slammed the door and locked it.
And I could hear what sounded like drills in there.
And a man jumped up out of the chair and ran over and tried to open the door and the door wouldn't open.
And I got scared.
And I looked around and I said, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know what's going on here.
Next thing I know this thing start vibrating and wiggling back and forth and my feet were bouncing up and down off the floor and I ran over and got in the chair real quick and then the smoke and the flames I could see outside the window I thought I was gonna burn up and then Then something invisible started pressing on me, and my face got all out of shape, and my lips were getting full of black, and my eyes were popping, and my head was licking, and I didn't know what was going on.
And nobody came.
And nobody came.
And then, all of a sudden, it was quiet.
It was so quiet and I didn't know what was going on.
And I got up and went over to the door and I tried to open the door and then all of a sudden my feet came off the floor and started floating up into the room.
Oh, be darned. Um, I can't...
Oh, be darned. Um, I can't...
I can't stay down no place.
And then I got sick.
And that was it.
I gotta tell you, that was the worst thing that I ever did was get sick in that thing because it all just floated all over the place and just got all over everybody and got all over me.
And I don't know, I don't know, and I didn't know, and I still, that, what to do?
I started pushin' these buttons and pullin' these levers and lights started blinkin' and things started comin' on and then I heard somebody screamin' in my head, Don't do that!
Stop it!
Stop it!
Don't!
Don't touch it!
So I did.
I pulled myself over to one of these little windows and looked out and by golly, all I seen was streaks of light goin' by.
Way off and close and everywhere.
Streaks of light goin' by so fast.
And it was beautiful, but I didn't know what it was, and I didn't know where I was.
And I sat down in the seat, and I strapped myself in with these straps they had there.
And then, somebody started talking in my ear.
And they told me, it's happening.
I said, what's happening?
He said, it's happening Civilization, as we know it, is disintegrating right before my eyes, and you're the only one who has escaped.
What man, Tim?
Tell me.
I don't know.
I don't know what you're talking about, you know.
He said a long time ago.
We became too smart for our own britches, he says.
Well, he didn't say that, but that's, you know, that's what I know about it.
We just got too darn smart and we took some shortcuts and stuff and there's something wrong with the computer.
I said, what man?
What are you talking about?
He said, well you don't have to worry about it, you see, because you have just skipped out of the space-time compendium and dates don't mean nothing where you're at.
You're going faster than the speed of light.
He said, go look out the window now.
I went and looked and I couldn't see nothing.
No streaks of light.
No nothing.
There was nothing out there.
Nowhere.
There was nothing.
So I went back and sat down again.
Faster than the speed of light.
Are you?
You know what?
I never could.
I'd go to the door and turn on the light.
I couldn't get to the bulb before it went on.
Nobody could.
He said, that's right.
This morning he said the computers opened up the plugs at all the bottoms of the beautiful
water courseways and the lakes and the rivers and the canals that we have here on our beautiful
red planet.
And all the water drained into the center of the planet.
Thank you.
And people were running out, he said, and getting water and everything that they could get it in and taking it back and trying to hoard it.
And pretty soon, there won't be any water.
We'll all die.
And everything's stopped.
Nothing works.
Doors don't even open anymore.
I said, what do you mean?
You know, you used to just push the button and the door would open.
Not anymore, he said.
Your job is to save the world.
And he talked to me for several days and I listened to him and he told me the news of what was happening and how many people were dying and the bodies were piling up in the streets and nothing was working and some people were locked in some places and things fell out of the sky and then just stopped running in the streets and pretty soon I could hear his voice was getting really weak.
And he told me, he says, you have the answer when you get there, you know, if they're just like us.
And he says, I know they are.
They're going to do the same thing.
You can help them survive if you get there in time.
I said, old man, tell me what I'm supposed to do.
He says, you know what to do.
And then I never heard from him again, and he got lonesome and dead.
And I was flying through the universe, and I didn't even know it.
I didn't know it.
I didn't know it.
It wasn't until later that I pushed this button on this thing in front of me, and I saw all these pictures of stars and planets, and I saw my planet.
I saw my beautiful red planet there, and then I saw where I was going.
Where I was going was the third planet from the sun.
It was blue and green and white things floating all around it.
It was really pretty.
Looked just like where I come from, except ours was more red, you see.
We had green expanses and beautiful blue waters and lakes and rivers and oceans.
According to what you told me, that was all gone, you see.
Because we got too big for our britches, and we thought we knew it all, and we didn't.
I just sat there, watching, learning from this thing on the front of me that kept telling me stuff.
And it just kept telling me stuff and new stuff.
And I was learning all the time.
And I learned what it was like before we had all these things.
Before we had all the stuff that, you know, I used to clean the hall and make it shine and beautiful and pretty.
There wasn't any halls, man.
And there was nothing to make it shine and make it pretty.
There was people living in the simple life.
Then I understood.
And I thought about that a long time as my journey lengthened.
It was a long time ago, you see?
It was a long time ago in the future when I started traveling.
And I traveled for a long, long, long time.
Long, long time.
I don't know how long it was.
But I know that I'm older now.
And I'm not as pretty as I used to be.
You see, I was a young man when I left.
And according to this thing and this screen in front of me, we had to go a long way around to get there.
Because of the time of the year that we left and all kinds of things that I really don't understand.
It just took a long time.
But I'm here now.
And I got here and just flew around this planet a couple of times and looked and I didn't see no life.
Didn't see nothing.
But you know, it was way high up and maybe I just couldn't see nothing.
Maybe I didn't know what to look for.
And then I fell into this mountain.
And this big black beast come up at me and took a bite out of my leg.
And I had to get away from him.
And I run into this building here.
There's nobody here.
But I'm up on top of a mountain and I'm in this place and all these things are here and it's all solar powered and I know about that, you see.
I learned it from my journey.
And I saw the panels up there and I looked and I've been investigating for a long time and then I walked in this room and I didn't know what it was at first but I finally found out.
And I'm leaving this message for you, if there's anybody left.
Hello?
Is there anybody?
Am I the only one?
If I'm the only one, then that'd be one hell of a thing, I've got to tell you.
That'd be a story to tell.
Maybe I'll tell that story someday, too.
But right now, you see, I'm bleeding, and I crashed into this mountain, and I've been feeling my life draining out of me all afternoon, and I know I ain't gonna last too long.
I hope I do.
I hope I'm not the last one, you see.
I hope there's a hallway here that I can clean.
I really, really like to do that, you see.
I'm the man they sent to save the world.
.
And I don't know if I can do it.
And if there's nobody left, then I can't do it.
And all I gotta do to save this world is just tell you a few little simple things that I know you haven't thought of before, you see.
Really simple things.
Easiest things in the world.
But first I've got to tell you what happened back there.
You see?
They were trying to cut the corners in the early days of the computer.
And somebody decided to make the date shorter.
And so they did.
They never thought that I would catch up to them.
They weren't thinking that far ahead.
They were just thinking of programming and making stuff work, and I don't even know what all that means, but it caused big problems, you see, and I don't know, I don't know how, I don't know how they could make that happen.
Now, you see, when I was nearing the end of my journey, I found this thing that I could point back to where I came from, and look through it, and there's nothing there.
There's no clouds.
There's no water.
And there's no people.
And I saw the wind blowing the dust all around the planet.
The only thing that I really saw that even reminded me anything that I used to know was there was still some ice on one of the poles.
I could see that.
And now I'm here on this beautiful planet and that's going to happen here too.
I can tell because, you know, I learned a few things in my journey.
I learned what a pewter was.
And there's a whole bunch of them in here.
A whole bunch of them.
All kinds of stuff in this place.
And there's nobody here but me, you know, and I don't, I don't know, I don't know how to work all of it.
But I'm trying.
I'm trying.
Anyway, they called it Y2K.
I learned that.
They called it Y2K.
Y2K.
And I said, why?
Why?
Y2K.
He says, are you trying to be funny now?
And I told him, yeah.
And he told me to shut up, and so I did.
But I've got to deliver my message that's come all the way across the universe to give you this message, you see?
And I can feel my life draining out of me.
I'm just so tired, you know?
And I couldn't find nothing, and I'm used to eating.
And it's cold here.
Thank you.
Thank you.
It's really cold, you see.
And I've been bleeding all day long, and I don't know how to stop it.
I don't know how to stop it.
I don't know how to stop it, and I don't know what to do.
I'm going to give you the message.
And I know you did the same thing we did.
I know you did it.
I know you did it.
Didn't you?
Yeah.
You did it, didn't you?
Well, you see, the answer is really simple, you know.
And that's why they sent me.
That's why they sent me.
It's because I don't know.
I don't know.
And I'm not into all that stuff.
And I never got into it.
And I wasn't mesmerized by it.
I just know if I'd have stayed it would have killed me too.
But now I'm here, you see, and I know how to stop it.
I know how to stop it so nobody gets hurt if I'm not too late.
Did it already happen?
Well, you see, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know, and that's why I'm leaving this message.
And I don't know if anybody's going to listen to this message.
I don't know if anybody's even going to care about this message.
I don't even know if anybody is alive but me here.
Nobody came.
When the needle burned, It didn't burn the needle.
I mean, it set a whole bunch of trees and bushes and things on fire.
And there's a big fire out there, I gotta tell you.
And I'm getting weaker and weaker.
I'm going to tell you what the answer is.
All us folks, we get all caught up in stuff and things, and we forget what it is just to be a simple man.
Just to be simple, you know?
I bet if you go back in your own history, you see, you'll find, I don't know now, I don't know, but I bet if you go back in your own history, you'll find that there was a time when you didn't have all this stuff.
When you didn't have it, when you didn't have it and it couldn't hurt you, you know?
We even had machines, you know, where I come from, that you couldn't turn off.
Sometimes something would go wrong with them and they would do terrible things.
And then we learned, man, man, we forgot to put the switch in there to turn it off.
And you see, that's the key to the whole thing.
You don't need all this stuff, man.
You don't.
It's not necessary.
So before it happens, here's what you do.
I'm going to tell you now because I can feel them fading away and them getting weaker and weaker.
Here's all you've got to do, man.
Here's everything that you've got to do.
You just go around everywhere.
If you didn't do what we did, then you start turning everything off.
Just turn it off, man.
Just turn it off.
Turn it all off.
Turn everything off.
Go back to living the way you used to live when things were simple and not complicated.
Life was a lot happier.
Everybody had a place.
There was nobody that couldn't fit in someplace, you know?
Not like it is now, and not like it was on my planet where everything got so complicated a lot of people couldn't fit in like me.
Only thing I could do was clean the hall, you see.
It's a good thing I really like to do that.
Otherwise, I would have been an outcast from my own society.
And I know that if there's anybody still living there, people like that, you don't fit in.
Where before, long, long time ago, everybody fit in.
Some place there was something to do for everybody.
Life was very simple, you know.
And you don't need all this stuff.
You don't need it.
I go around in this building right here.
I've been exploring it all day long since it got burned in the fire and the beast took the chunk out of my leg.
I get all cuts and a couple of deep ones over here and I stick my fingers way down in there and it hurts man and it's just bleeding and it's all coming out.
But I know the answer.
Turn it off.
Just turn it all off and turn your back on it and walk away and don't go back to that stuff because it really don't make your life any better.
It really don't make your life any better.
You just think it does.
Where I come from, my friend told me, he says, you know, this is the happiest people I ever met were
people just like you that led a simple life.
And that's what we should have done, but it's too late, he said.
Well, if you're still living here, if there's anybody that's going to listen to this, if I'm not too late, and it's not too late for you, man.
You know?
It's not too late.
It's not too late.
You can turn it around, man.
You can really do it.
Just turn everything off.
Just turn it off, man.
And walk away from it.
And don't mess with that kind of stuff again.
You don't need it.
You don't need it.
Life will be better.
See where I come from?
Nobody ever talked to anybody.
You heard in my story how hard it was to talk to anybody.
Everybody was busy, man.
They were busy.
And when they weren't busy, when they weren't working, they were busy.
They were busy always looking at something.
Always doing something.
Always.
Always.
And nobody ever talked to nobody, man.
Nobody.
Nobody ever talked to anybody.
Nobody knew anybody.
Nobody knew me, man.
I didn't know nobody.
I walk in the room and say, hey, anybody want to go have a cup of coffee?
They throw me out, man.
Throw me out.
We were free.
Oh, we were free.
I don't know if you're free here, but you need to be free.
Let me tell you what all that stuff does to you.
If you want to be free, you can't be free unless they Actually, intentionally don't do stuff with it to keep you free because they can know everything about you that there is.
They can track you.
They can follow you.
They can do it all, man.
They can take it away from you.
They can hurt you, man.
On my planet, before we became free, if there was somebody a thousand doobalongs away, that's halfway across the planet, man.
Halfway across the planet, man.
If there was somebody over there that just whispered something that they didn't want anybody to hear, they could push a button and kill him in a second.
That's how advanced we were.
But we became free.
We learned how to solve that problem, you see?
And we unprogrammed all that stuff.
Nobody was doing that stuff anymore.
Nobody knew if I was in the hallway or if I was in my room.
Nobody knew if I was sitting on the street talking to the guy with the drink or if I was talking to the girl on the sidewalk.
Nobody knew.
Nobody knew.
I don't know.
I don't know how they could have known because it wasn't going on that way anymore, you see.
And I'm so tired.
I've come a long way just to tell you this.
And I hope you just understand that they sent me because I really did understand, but I didn't know.
I didn't know.
I didn't know I understood.
I didn't know.
I was just happy in my little hallway there, you see.
But that's the answer.
It started all off.
Just turn it off.
Just...
Turn it off and walk away.
That's all you gotta do, man.
I don't know about nothing else here.
I don't know much of nothing except the less complicated my life is, the happier I've always been.
And I always had, always had my hallway, you see.
And I was, I was really happy in my home.
I hope I didn't do this for nothing.
I hope I didn't do this.
I'm sorry.
I'm pretty, pretty, and I want to talk to you, my dear.
Well, you know that I love you, baby, more than anything in this world.
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