DeSantis, Target Boycott, and When People Think The Bee Is Real
Kyle, Adam, Brandon and Travis (aka Trevor) sit down to discuss their recent adventure to San Francisco, the latest news, and times people thought the Bee was real! The reason for our trip to San Francisco will be revealed next week… wink wink. DeSantis recently announced his 2024 Presidential Campaign and we discuss some of the alleged nicknames Trump has considered for DeSantis. Brandon said he "love[s] the double boycott" that Target is enduring, as both the Left and Right are mad at Target. Travis doesn't get the Target craze. This episode is brought to you by our wonderful sponsors who you should absolutely check out: Allegiance Gold:http://protectwithbee.com PublicSq on Apple: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/publicsq/id1573823343 PublicSq on Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.publicsq.app&hl=en_US&gl=US&showAllReviews=true&pli=1 Samaritan Ministries:http://samaritanministries.org/thebabylonbee Seven Weeks Coffee: http://sevenweekscoffee.com In the full-length ad-free subscribers-only podcast, the Bee reviews photoshops of Kyle in random locations, sent in by subscribers. And we go through subscriber-submitted headlines of the week! Use promocode 'PODCAST' to get 20% off signing up at: http://babylonbee.com/plans
The Babylon Bee did everything there was to do in San Francisco.
Well, almost everything.
Wink.
Clown World is coming to a Dodgers game.
Send in the nuns.
Wink.
DeSantis is running for president.
Will Trump announce a better nickname?
Wink.
Here's an inspirational quote.
I love the double boycott.
Said by Brandon Toy.
Wink.
All this and more on.
Wink.
Wink.
The Babylon Bee Podcast.
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Welcome everyone to the Babylon Bee podcast.
It's a sausage fest today.
Don't say that.
We went to San Francisco.
Because we went to San Francisco.
But we did not share any soups.
We didn't share soups.
We did share curry, though.
We did.
So Kyle often complains about us getting weird food at the office.
Any food that's not a sandwich or a burger, essentially.
They call non-white foods.
But we went to like it was a Chinese Indian fusion restaurant or Himalayan, all of the above.
And I ordered three weird things mixed.
Yeah, absolutely.
I ordered lamb tikka masala and we were all just starving.
So I said, try some, Kyle.
He took a bite and he said, wow, this sauce is delightful.
And I said, yes, this is the weird food you've been avoiding, Kyle.
Okay, well, yeah.
But I will say, like, I don't like fish still.
Okay.
And I think eating in an office setting, sometimes there's like a very pungent odor associated with weird food.
So then your problem will be with the fish, not with the ethnic food.
Well, the fish, you have to do it.
But this doesn't have anything to do with fish.
Yeah, that's also true, right?
Well, I'm just saying, often when I complained about the weird food here, it was fish.
I don't think we've only ordered fish tacos.
No, that's not true.
We had those.
At the old office, there was one whole pokey bowl.
There was one Indian place we ordered from.
There's a few fish dishes there.
But I feel like you've called every non white sandwich or burger food.
Every minority food that we call it weird.
What is the weirdest food you've eaten at home?
Just at home?
Well, because I'm curious what your personal life is.
Are you just only eating burgers and sandwiches?
Yeah, pretty much.
Okay.
Yeah.
Are your kids more adventurous eaters?
Yes.
Now, are you Eurocentric?
Does Italian and French count as weird?
I don't know if I know many French foods.
I mean, they'll do like Escargot.
Is that too weird for you?
Frog legs.
That would be weird to me.
I've had frog legs.
I have not had escargot.
All of the above are good.
They're all good.
But I wouldn't be offended if an Indian man was like, hello, your food is weird.
Like if you gave him a hamburger and he said, this is weird.
I went hesitant whether or not you're going to commit to the action.
Yeah, I went halfway.
Well, yeah, we went up to San Francisco and Twitter headquarters where it is rumored that an interview with Elon Musk may or may not have happened.
And it may or may not be coming out next week.
I find that hard to believe.
Which part?
I would love if it was if we didn't have one.
If you just said that.
It may or may not.
But then it was.
It's not.
It was.
We just made it up.
There's not one.
Yeah.
The good news is that all of Elon Musk's stocks are going up thanks to this interview.
Thanks to the interview.
Yeah, we really helped him out.
Gave him a platform.
That reminds me of Skyward Sword, the Zelda game.
Travis's favorite.
Yeah.
You know, the companion always tells you there's like a 98% probability.
So there's like this guide with you in Zelda.
It's your sword.
It's your sword who talks to you.
And she's like, because the sword is a woman.
Her name is Fee.
Fee.
And she tries to point you in the right direction.
Everything in Zelda turns out to be a woman.
Yeah, it's true.
Even Zelda.
But she tries to point you in the right direction by saying, like, they made her like a computer.
So she goes, there's a 61% probability that your destination is over here, that you need to open this treasure chest or whatever.
But it's always true.
Like, it's always the right guess.
But she's like, always has these probabilities, but it's 100% of the time.
So it's not how probability works.
I wish just one time in the game they were like, it's an 80% probability you need to go through this door and then you die.
And she's like, oh, that was wrong.
It's like the old Anchorman quote, the 60% of the time it works every time.
She kind of reminded me of the advanced AI and Quantum Leap, Ziggy.
Ziggy says there's a third of the show.
I never saw Quantum Leap.
I think there's a treasure chest behind this door.
I never saw Quantum Leap.
Is it good?
World's best show.
Really?
It's great, but for some reason, I always got Quantum Leap confused with what's that?
Daily Edition?
Sliders.
What's that?
That one where the guy that gets a newspaper day early.
Oh, early edition.
Early edition.
For some reason, I always forgot about that.
I always got those two shows too.
I forgot about that show too.
Most people forgot about that.
Except Brandon Carroll.
You guys remember the show Sliders?
I do, but I didn't watch it much.
I think I've seen a few episodes.
You could like warp into different realities.
My favorite thing about Sliders is the very first episode when he goes, you're going to love Sliding Quinn.
Because he's talking to himself.
And I don't know.
I don't know why I think about it.
We've heard Travis just rethink the entire episode.
I remember nothing about it except that it was called Sliders and they slid through this virtual show.
I remember the commercials for it because it would show the wormhole they were sliding through and all the trailers for it.
So yeah, Kyle, Dan, and Brandon saw the Golden Gate Bridge, which Brandon lovingly drove us across.
Oh, it's lovingly.
Very lovingly.
Well, Brandon's from the area, so he knew the right spot to look at it from, and it was beautiful.
We'll throw some pictures up there.
And I got to take Dan to a date to the Giants game.
Nice.
Oh, nice.
It wasn't gay day or anything.
It was just in San Francisco, they just call that day.
And Dan came up with this headline from the game: Cotton Candy Vendor patiently waits for most important play of game to stand right in front of you.
They were the most aggressive ballpark vendors I had ever seen.
They were constantly standing right in front of us and like, cotton candy, churros.
And they had this massive bindle of cotton candy that was just like huge.
And they would hold it right in front of you.
We're like, you know, and in baseball, nothing happens for a very long time.
And we're like, oh, this is something that's going to happen.
And he's like waving a cotton candy.
Waiting for that moment.
Now's my chance.
Yeah.
Anyway, so that was that.
We also ate some of the best sandwiches around at Little Lucas Sandwich Shop with Lucas.
I'm going to go to the sandwich shop in South San Francisco.
If you're ever in the area, go there.
Order extra garlic sauce.
Particularly, go for the Southwestern or the Wild Turkey.
Those are my favorites.
A great time was had.
We only saw one bag of sidewalk feces.
And it was bagged already.
It was pre-bagged.
It was bagged, but it was also stepped on, so it was kind of like, you know.
Put a picture up of that.
And then we'll see the picture of that.
Brandon and Dan drove a Tesla, and how was the Tesla road trip?
It was, it was, it worked, worked out pretty well.
I was a little.
How many charges did you need to get up to San Francisco?
We only did one like major charge and then a few top-ups.
So, like, normally while driving up, I'll stop for guests maybe two times.
So, one, like, 30-minute rest stop, and the other ones were just like five-minute top-ups.
Okay.
That's pretty cool.
So, 30 stops, though.
Pretty smooth.
Yeah, about 40.
Well, we're going to talk Target.
We're going to talk Dodgers.
We're going to talk about Jack from Twitter.
And we're also going to look at more times people thought the Babylon Bee was real.
So that's going to be fun.
Always fun.
Hit like, subscribe, and hit the little bell to keep up with our podcast on YouTube and Rumble.
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And I do mean anything, wink, in the Babylon Bee store.
And we have a new product, which is our not Bud Light Koozie.
So I'm actually not clear if this is supposed to be you're drinking Bud Light and you don't want people to know it or just virtue signal.
Or you're just like, I don't drink Bud Light, man.
I think it could be either.
I think you'll use it either way.
I think I imagine it more as you're really not drinking.
Yeah, I don't like Bud Light.
But it's a good way to disguise if you still want to secretly drink Bud Light because just life likes the awful flavor.
You can hide it in one of these and hang out with your conservative friends.
Or you could just drink it in the closet, hidden in the closet.
Yeah, you could just be in the closet.
Is it Bud Light drinking?
And lying to yourself, that's what you mean.
Yeah.
Hey, Mr. Postman, what's in the mailbag?
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Well, a couple weeks ago, we talked about, or maybe it was last week, we talked about TV commercials, remember?
Old classic commercials for games and toys that we remember.
And one of our favorites was Crossfire.
Get caught up in the Crossfire.
And so listener Andy C sent us a picture of his cousin's kids playing Crossfire.
So we don't know if we actually have permission to show his cousin's kids, but there they are.
Saw my cousin's kids playing and thought of you.
So that's cool.
I didn't know that's cool that they still have that game around.
I think they started remaking it.
I feel like everyone remembers that song.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Did the rules to that game make any sense?
Were you trying to like...
It really wasn't.
You're just shooting balls at it.
You're just shooting.
There's a little thing in the middle.
Or as it calls in San Francisco, day.
And then you're shooting balls at the little target thing, and then it's moving around.
It's like a bunch of people.
So you're trying to shoot that thing to get it to be.
I think we always just shot the balls at each other.
They also, in that picture, they also have one of those little wire things where you trace the beetle.
I thought those only existed in doctor's office.
That's what I always remember.
You could get one of those at home.
Maybe they stole it.
They have all the diseases children can see.
It's like every sick kid comes in there and touches all the bad.
And my goal was always to try to flick the bead from the far end and see if you can make it all the way across to the power.
And then Colleen C sent in a commercial she wants to see if we remember the spicy meatball.
Yes.
Alka Seltzer ad.
This is where that quote comes from.
Mamma Mia acts for some species.
Take 28.
Was this part of the ad that I'll take or no?
I don't remember if the ad was.
Mamma Mia!
That's a spicy meatball.
Got what was the matter with that?
The accent.
Cut.
It has got to be fake.
Micy micey balsy balsy.
Take 59.
Yeah, it's a fan.
It's action.
Sometimes you eat more than you should, and when it's spicy, besides.
Mamma Mia, do you need Alka Seltzer?
Alka Seltzer can help unstuff you, relieve the acid indigestion, and help make you your old self again.
Mamma Mia, that's a spicy meatball.
That's great.
That's great for lunch.
I don't think I've ever seen that before.
I feel like it's a really advanced commercial for the time.
I was going to say they're doing the pioneer real meta joke.
The false blooper reel.
Well, it's the same year that we landed on the moon.
So I think this was more advanced.
And we had bloopers from that, too.
The same person directed both of them.
Well, wow, what's in the news this week?
I'm really glad you asked.
What's in the news this week?
Hey guys, Kyle here.
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Ron DeSantis is reported going reportedly going to announce his presidential bid on a Twitter spaces with Elon Musk.
What do you think he'll announce?
I'm not sure.
I think his presidential bid, probably.
But what will he be president of?
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know.
And of course, it might already be, it might be happening right now while we're doing this podcast.
So we're probably behind the times by the time you guys listen to this.
But Dan was putting our notes together and he wants me to say that there is a Team DeSantis account on Twitter now that has an alligator head lurking in the water as a cover photo.
And the description area says May 24th, 2023, which is today.
So we think that's going to happen today.
I've always been Team Edward, personally.
But does Edward have an alligator eyeball as his cover photo?
No, but he loves Bella.
And of course, the media immediately lost its mind.
The root said, Should black people be afraid now that Ron DeSantis plans to announce his presidential bid?
Dot dot dot on Twitter?
These people are insane.
How much of it is genuine concern versus intentional lying?
Like, how much of it is do they actually believe?
Well, they're just asking questions.
Should they be concerned?
No, I don't.
It's hard to tell because I think there are people on the left.
There's some that are genuinely evil and drive the narrative and are pushing it.
But then they're brainwashing propaganda dupes so many people into actually being afraid and thinking, oh, Ron DeSantis really hates black people and stuff like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, they definitely delude themselves to some degree.
I mean, you can see it.
If you get too far into the right-wing rabbit hole, too, there's certain things you can get overly concerned about.
And you're like, you go out in the real world.
You're like, okay, maybe that's not as big of an issue.
So are black people.
Are black people afraid that he's doing it on Twitter or just that he's doing it?
That's why I don't understand.
It's a weird phrase.
That's the first thing that's on Twitter more threatening to black people.
On Twitter?
I don't know.
And Vanity Fair said, report Ron DeSantis will formally announce his 2024 bid with Elon Musk.
Because apparently David Duke wasn't available.
Oh, got him.
Is that a real headline?
That's a real headless.
So is David Duke okay?
Is he okay?
He's not available, apparently.
Has anyone seen him recently?
He had a dentist appointment.
But it's interesting that he's announcing on Twitter.
Like normally they would get like a prime time Fox news spot or something.
I think it's cool that Twitter's kind of taking over on.
Fox's prime time news spot moved to Twitter.
It's true.
On Truth Social, Trump rejected the nickname Meatball Ron.
He rejected it.
No, I'm not using that one.
Bloomberg has reported in March that he privately entertained the following nicknames: Tiny 2024.
I'm all on board.
Oh, my God.
Ron Dee.
I can't wait.
Ron D. Establishment.
Ron Dishonest.
And Ron DeSoros.
If you guys have any good nickname ideas for Ron DeSantis, please write them in.
This is just amazing.
This is a little asides, but I like the meatball Ron juxtaposed with Bloomberg.
Do you guys remember when Bloomberg was running for president and he announced he had like this weird viral campaign, and one of it was a plate of meatballs, and Bloomberg's face was among them.
And it said, Can you guess which one's not a meatball or something like that?
It was so weird.
Which one of these is not a meatball?
One thing I remember from his campaign is they were paying people like a thousand bucks to say they support him on Twitter and stuff.
That's about right.
Where does Meatball Ron even come from?
Like, is he Italian?
Meatball Ron.
Well, he rejected the nickname, so maybe it just didn't make any sense.
This is a word for an oddly round head, Ron DeSantis.
That's what it is.
He does have, like, his haircut makes his head appear more round.
Yeah, he's a real meatball.
That's what I think, personally.
Spicy meatball.
I'm just excited for Trump to say more things like this.
I'm always excited for him.
I want him to say all of them in a row and just be like, I'm not sure which one I'm going with, but it was.
He's listening to the crowd.
He still throws in a de sanctimonious every now and then, which is the worst one.
It's so bad.
I like how he's workshopping it.
Yeah.
Also, recently he said Rob, like Rob DeSanctis.
Not even de Sanctis.
That's the best one.
They keep having like, there's almost a conspiracy theory, kind of like with Ben Shapiro about Ron DeSantis' height.
So they should, he should have called him like Ron DeShorty.
That's not bad.
Also in the news, Target holds an emergency meeting because they're terrified of being Bud Lighted.
So there's conservative boycott threats against Target because of their Pride Month display where they had tuck-friendly underwear and children's shirts and books about drag queens and transgender people.
Reportedly fearful of a Bud Light situation, Target has instructed some stores to move LGBTQ Pride merchandise away from the front of their locations after customer outrage over a transgender-friendly line of clothing.
Many Target locations across the country feature massive June Pride Month displays on an annual basis.
But the retail juggernaut has been criticized by some conservatives for the displays with children's items and designs from the satanic designer Abra Pollen.
It's the guy, I don't know if I'm saying his name right, but he's this designer who made some of their shirts and he has stuff that's very pro-Satan.
And there's a guillotine that says homophobe headrest.
Is that like a pin or what is that?
That's a pin.
They don't sell these at Target specifically.
This is the other stuff the designer also designed.
Exactly.
And Satan respects pronouns.
Which is true.
That's true.
Here in hell, they respect your pronouns.
Really into that thing.
Fight for trans rights with axes.
Battle axes.
But we're excited because now we have a double boycott.
We do.
So conservatives were irritated at this and got Target to kind of scale back some of the displays.
And because Target's pulling back some of the displays, Gavin Newsom has said that this is an attack on the gay community happening across the country.
So now Gavin Newsome's calling for liberals to make their voices heard with Target.
So I think Target can't really.
Target just has Pride merchandise.
They sell it in their store.
It's prominently featured for two months out of the year.
And them taking a few stores and moving some of the Pride stuff a little further back is, quote, a systematic attack on the gay community happening across the country.
Wake up, America.
This doesn't stop here.
You're black.
You're Asian.
You're Jewish.
You're a woman.
You're next.
Brandon, you're next.
This is insane.
I know I am a woman.
I will be next.
Are you as afraid of Target as black people should be of Ron DeSantis talking to Elon on Twitter?
That's a good question.
I love this.
I mean, I grew up, obviously in the 90s, I was part of the boycott, the Christian boycott movement.
And then over time in the early 2000s and mid-2010s, I was like, these boycotts don't really work.
This leftist stuff is everywhere.
There's no avoiding it.
We can't get around it.
There's no possible way to continue living our lives.
And we're just going to be inconveniencing ourselves and not impacting their bottom line at all.
But we're actually seeing like some movement with Bud Light.
They are panicking right now.
And so I just want to remind all of our audience, don't drink Bud Light, not just because of the brand and their values, but also because of the product.
I'm not.
And I think a reason.
I thought you were until I saw that.
Well, I think it makes sense.
These boycotts, they're brought out.
It's still, you know, a conservative Christian base who's outraged by this stuff.
But the LGBTQ stuff, where a lot more people start to turn against it is the trans stuff and the pushing it on kids.
There's a difference if it's just, you know, the old argument.
I still think morally as a Christian, it's like I don't approve of gay marriage and things like that.
But there was this argument of just let people live their lives.
Now it's becoming more and more everyone has to participate in this trans delusion and you have to affirm it and you have to speak what they say and harm what they think.
And harm an entire generation on kids.
You have to teach kids about this.
Harm an entire generation of children and bring them into this cult of 40% suicidality rate.
Exactly.
It's absolutely insane.
And so while they're feeling the pressure, and also there's actually a conversation being had about it.
Like they're actually talking about this.
Before, it was just the evangelical crowds just saying, we're not going to watch Disney movies.
And Disney movies was like, what's going on?
Yeah.
But now they're actually talking about it and having behind the scenes meetings.
So, I mean, I would, I know Target is a tough one.
I understand that Target is a tough one.
But I personally am going to not shop at Target for the month of June.
Yeah.
And I think that's not much to give up.
I think we could all do that.
We could, I think everyone could call Target, call, or send a quick email and say, I will not be supporting Target during the month of June.
And this is why, because they are pushing an ideology that is harmful to children.
And I do not want my money to support that.
And I think while this conversation is happening within Target, it will hopefully prevent them from doing this in the future and continuing to push forward in these literally satanic ideas.
Quite literally.
Travis, did you have a thought?
I did.
Actually, I just more of a question.
We're in a podcast and he raises his hand.
More of a point.
Travis.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Why is Target tough?
You said, I know Target's tough, but I'm going to boycott blah blah blah.
Why is Target tough?
Target is tough because it's obviously so many people rely on going there for anything.
It's groceries.
It's.
Oh, that's right.
We can't go to Walmart because Emma hates it.
I forgot.
I'm going to get to a point where I just fly to Texas once a year, stock up at Bucky's.
Buckies.
Let's fly back with my.
Yeah.
I'm going to get groceries at Hobby Lobby.
For me, there's a Target one mile from me, and the closest Walmart is like five or six miles away, and it's Walmart.
You know, it's just Walmart.
See, I was, I grew up with Walmart, so I was always more Walmart than Target, but it was a proximity thing.
It's like the Walmart.
If I was near Walmart, I'd be going to Walmart.
It's also like an experience for some people.
Like, people just love Target.
It's like a lifestyle.
It's a brand thing, even though aside from their store brands, they're not really a brand.
They're just, they resell other things.
But like, there's so much loyalty to it.
And I get it.
Like, I grew up loving Target.
And, but, I mean, I think for one month, like, we could just give that up and send a message.
I feel like I missed something because Target doesn't make me feel that way.
I'm just like, oh, it's a store.
Whatever.
It's a store.
And they're like, boycotting.
You're like, all right, I only went there every now and then anyway.
Yeah.
So you're not giving anything up?
Not really.
So I'm committed.
Even though, though, as someone, I'm not like a die-hard Target customer, but I would go there to pick things up.
But this kind of stuff does make me think, oh, I'll go somewhere else.
Right.
A little inconvenience for us for the sake of preserving children, I think, is not a large price to pay.
Just to show how some of this woke stuff is actually starting to reach the people that are making the purchasing decisions.
My wife makes all the decisions in our house, you know, about everything.
As is a biblical and as the Bible commands.
And she had told me a few months ago she's not shopping at Ulta anymore.
And she doesn't follow politics at all.
She doesn't care.
She just doesn't want to be involved in it.
She just wants to live her life.
And she saw the Ulta thing somehow trickled into her news feed.
I think they had Dylan Mulvaney or something.
He did a podcast where it was Dylan Mulvaney with one of their podcasters talking about being a mom, his womanhood beliefs, and how he wants to be a mom someday.
And I can totally do that, is what he said.
That's right.
So she heard about that.
And she used to work at Ulta.
She loves Ulta.
And she's like, I'm not going to Ulta anymore, I guess.
And she's like, tell me all these makeup brands that have transgender models.
And she's like, I'm just not going to buy it.
And I'll find something else.
And then she told me the other day we were going to go pick up some shoes or something from one of our kids.
She's like, well, we're not going to Target anymore.
So there's thought that, you know, I'm like, okay, well, at least I have to do it secretly now.
At least for the month of June, we should leave Target as customers, like Kyle left Target as an employee.
It's true.
Well, and what I, what I, the, the lesson I hope these.
Did I tell you my quitting Target story?
Yeah, I did.
The lesson I hope these companies start to learn, which is so insane, is just stay out of politics.
Like, absolutely.
That's what's so insane about Gavin Newsom's response to this.
That's an attack.
The left wants these companies to have to pander to them.
Yes.
It's what they do with Bud Light.
It's what they're doing with the Dodgers.
It's they think you can't just stay out of politics.
You can't just stay out of the culture wars.
You have to support the left and you have to support their most extreme gender ideology beliefs or you're against them.
And they'll say it's because they're trying to protect the lives of the kids because they say that their ideology will lead to more kids being accepting of themselves and committing less suicide.
But the real question to ask is, are more or less kids now committing suicide due to trans ideology, due to their trans identity, are more or less kids than they were 10 years ago?
And I think it's more.
I think it's more because it's a social contagion that is affecting people and affecting their rates of depression and suicidality.
I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Oh, thank you.
See, I don't know.
I have heard that.
I don't know the statistics offhand, but it's definitely, even if it's just a handful of them, which I think it's more than that, that will regret these decisions, you're hurting people when they're injecting them with hormones and doing these gender surgeries.
And even if you're just raising a child like that for a period of its life, that has psychological consequences.
It's like if adults want to make this decision, whether we agree with it or not, it's different.
It's an adult.
Live your life that way as long as you're not pushing it on other people.
But yeah, you're indoctrinating kids and you're teaching them to make life-changing decisions with consequences that they may not be able to undo.
You know, what I think is strange too is as we've been discussing how it's like companies pushing these things.
And just in the general, in the workplace, it's always been don't talk about politics, don't talk about religion, don't talk about all this stuff.
And yet the CEOs will go out and talk about it all publicly.
And then, you know, the little bee ant working in their hive will get in trouble and fired because they said something once on Twitter.
It's a double standard.
And I'm not here for it.
America.
I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Yeah, it's not as good as Brandon.
So Bud Light continues to hammer in sales.
They're down 25% from the same point last year.
And I'm loving it.
McDonald's.
Hashtag.
I'm loving it.
Yeah, the latest, I think, was they're buying back a bunch of expired beer from wholesalers because nobody's buying it.
And now I just heard there's rumors that there's competing brands that may experience supply chain shortages because everybody's switching to other brands.
They're buying it all out.
Okay, yeah.
Which I did hear people are switching to Coors Light and Miller Light.
Might I recommend Yangling if it's available in your area?
Yingling's a good, good Pennsylvania American beer, yeah.
I think all beers are gross, personally.
I heard people were upset at Yingling because they were supporting a Pride parade or something.
But so does Coors and Miller Light.
That's the thing.
The moral of the story is all beer is gay.
Speaking of gay, some people are still drinking Bud Light, and I'm not here for it.
Wink.
Yep.
You can't wink for me.
Right.
Let's talk about the Dodgers.
The Ellie Dodgers cave to the anti-Catholic drag queen group that features sexual performances with Jesus in quotes because it's not really Jesus and drag nuns featuring religious and Catholic imagery.
And they will now let them be part of Pride Night after all.
So the Dodgers have a Pride Night coming up, which a lot of, I think 28 of the 30 MLP teams have a Pride Night.
Yeah.
And I don't know what the two are then.
Yeah, what are the two that I'll become fans?
I'll become big fans.
Well, which I admit, just to jump ahead, because I posted on Twitter, and it wasn't controversial because I have no followers.
But it was like, oh, you know, the Dodgers are doing this thing.
Go, Padres, because Kyle likes the Padres.
I'll do it.
I'll just do that.
And then I'm like, oh, wait, they have a Pride Night too.
Almost all of them do.
Then who cares?
The corporations have all been infiltrated.
So I'm going to make my own baseball league.
The Padres have become the Madres.
They are now.
And the annoying thing is that so many of the baseball players are Catholics, Latinos, and the fanbase from the Dominican Republic or one of those countries with weird food.
Japan.
Japan.
Some are from Japan and Korea.
And they don't.
This is totally like white colonialism of putting our ideas and making them bow the knee to these things.
Wear the rainbow jersey.
Wear it.
So the Dodgers had invited this group.
And if you look up some of their stuff, which you shouldn't, it's really blasphemous.
But here's some pictures.
Take a look.
I mean, even leaving behind all the gross sex stuff, inviting a group whose motto is go forth and send some more.
I just think maybe not a good look for it.
Unifying sports team in general, regardless of any of the pole dancing on crosses.
Well, and they always put the offense of these leftist groups over the offense of mainstream Christians.
Because they originally said they were going to disinvite this group.
And then it's, of course, it's the same with like the Gavin Newsom backlash against Target.
It's like, no, we're going to get mad at you.
And it doesn't seem like they ever.
I hope some of these companies start getting the fortitude to just take a stand on it and not bow to them.
Because I honestly don't think you'll lose as much, you know, financially, you won't lose as much popularity if you just take a stand against this stuff and don't participate.
I don't think anyone would have cared.
Yeah.
I mean, it's not like they were canceling Pride Night, which would be great if they were doing that.
That's the funny thing.
They're still doing that.
It's like, unless you have 100%, you buy into absolutely everything on the left, you're going to get canceled.
Like, they're still doing a Pride Night.
It's just 99% of it because they've even disinvited one small group from this massive.
It was specifically anti-Catholic and anti-Argentinian.
They said, okay, fine.
That's a little too far.
We'll take that out.
What?
Are you a bigot?
Yeah.
You know, well, we're still having Pride Night and everything.
It's not enough for them.
So they issued an official statement.
Brandon, can you read it in an Irish accent?
I could, but it's a bit long.
I think it's.
And the background is rainbow, so it's hard to read.
But this reminds me of that sketch, the Are We the Baddies sketch.
Have you guys ever seen that?
There's these guys that are like part of a Nazi group and they're wearing like skull badges and stuff.
And they're like, I've got a question for you.
Do you think that maybe we might be the bad guy?
We've got the skulls and whatnot.
What group does that?
It's an Australian sketch comedy show.
I'm not remembering the name.
We'll throw it on the screen.
I think that goes.
Red Planet Dorsey.
There's so many different facets that that applies to.
I remember there was a, I think it was either a pro-life rally and there was someone protesting them, or it was a pro-choice rally.
And there was this woman that covered herself in dead baby dolls and was like screaming.
And it was like, do you ever stop to think about the imagery that you're portraying?
A maniacal woman covered in dead babies.
Do you ever think you might be on the wrong side?
We are the satanic drag queens called the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.
Go and send some more.
I think maybe we're the bad guys.
It is, you know, I think why are the pictures?
Hide the pictures.
And between the target designer and this, and there's other things in society recently, too.
You know, there was always Christians who would say this is demonic or this is evil.
It's becoming more and more pronounced.
They're just saying it.
They're just putting it out there.
They're just outright saying it now.
That this is satanic.
That there is demonic ideology behind a lot of this stuff.
Yeah.
Uh.
So what's next is that this tweet seems worth discussing.
Oh, what's the tweet?
Considering Jack's history of collaborating with the intelligence agencies.
Jack from Twitter tweeted, splinter the CIA, NSA, and FBI into a thousand pieces and scatter them into the winds.
And he linked to an image of JFK.
I think, like, Jack Dorsey, he seems to be going on a journey.
I think all the peyote and meditations has actually like woken up, woken something off.
He's starting to wake up to some fundamental truths ever since he's been away from the limelight of Twitter.
I mean, I'm not saying that I'm going to go out and fully endorse it.
He seems to get it right sometimes.
Yeah, exactly.
He seems to be exploring exploring other ideas, which is rare.
It's probably just the peyote.
And Elon Musk replied.
Exclamation.
That's what I was going to do.
I couldn't get the noise right.
It's a solid snake.
Yeah.
Exclamation mark.
Travis did it exactly.
Exactly right.
I need to do it again.
And we need to put, can we please digitally put the exclamation mark over?
Yeah, let's definitely give our editor more work.
There's been like two pictures to add to this whole episode.
We're not giving the editor much work.
We're not putting all those drag queen pictures.
Now he has to put three graphics.
And finally, community notes continues to be a national treasure.
Tiff Shuttlesworth said, fact, God has never made a single drop of alcohol.
The earth has never produced a single drop of alcohol.
100% of all wine and alcohol is manufactured by fallen men.
Nothing good ever comes out of alcohol.
And there was a community note.
Jesus turned water into wine.
Source, the Bible.
Oh, man.
And then they said grapefruit.
Don't understand what he's saying.
I love the confidence he's making, man.
I love the confidence.
That's all.
The confidence of that smiling face, too.
It's just like, I know my stuff.
It's probably just fundamentalist Baptist guys.
Well, it's, yeah, I don't even know who he is.
Although his name, he sounds like a villain in a Wonka movie, Tim.
Oh, no, it's Shuttlesworth.
Doesn't fruit naturally ferment sometimes?
That was the rest of this video.
Yeah, check.
Grapes will ferment on the vine naturally.
So much so that almost all fruit juice of any kind has a tiny bit of alcohol.
I mean, I would agree that nothing good comes out of alcohol.
But, I mean, you got to use peyote for that.
Yeah, you got to use peyote for that.
I mean, I think alcohol is a dangerous problem, but yeah, to say that there's like God didn't invent, you know, fruit that ferments is bizarre, considering, you know, basically.
So you sound like you're on the side of Shuttlesworth.
I'm closer than, you know, I don't think it's appropriate for us.
You're closest.
Yes, I'm the closest.
But like, yeah, Jesus turned water into wine.
And I would argue that there was a different alcoholic content because I don't think Jesus was like, hey, everyone, let's get hammered.
We are lined up in level of alcoholism.
Alcoholism.
In level of alcoholism.
But yeah, I think you would do more damage by just saying something outright false like that.
Let's hurry up.
I got to get a drink.
Starting to shake.
Not Bud Light.
Well, here's our banger of the week.
Banger of the week.
Hey there, folks.
I want to tell you about one of the best coffees I've ever tasted with an amazing mission that you're going to want to support.
I'm talking about Seven Weeks Coffee, a pro-life coffee company that donates 10% of gross sales to pregnancy centers.
As the Biden administration continues to target pro-lifers, we need to stand up as Christians to support mothers in need like never before.
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Now you can have an impact saving lives simply through your morning cup of coffee.
Why the name Seven Weeks?
Well, at Seven Weeks, a baby is the size of a coffee bean, and its heartbeat is clearly detected.
How cool is that?
I personally love their coffee because it's from the top 2% of beans in the world.
It's delicious and organically farmed.
And thousands of Americans must love it too, because in a year, they raised over $125,000 for pregnancy centers just from the sale of their coffee.
So join me today in standing up to progressive woke companies like Starbucks who, you know, funds abortions and go to 7weekscoffee.com.
Now you have an alternative.
Why would you drink anything else?
Try 7 Weeks Coffee Today at 7weeksCoffee.com.
Man fights good fight, finishes race, keeps the faith.
With a picture of Presbyterian minister Tim Keller, who passed away this week.
Extremely sad.
He was only 72, I think, and had a battle with cancer.
I think it was throat cancer, if I remember right.
But this guy was extremely influential on modern evangelicalism.
I read three or four of his books about 15, 20 years ago.
So he was kind of a formative guy in apologetics.
And really sad.
He was one of the first guys that the Babylon Bee wrote satirical articles about.
And he was the first guy who would share them.
Like he would share them.
Oh, I love this.
And that was always a big moment for me.
That's when I started realizing Babylon Bee was getting popular.
Like, oh my gosh, you know, this guy's sharing it.
He's authorized.
He's from Allentown, Pennsylvania, originally, where I grew up.
Oh, wow.
He didn't live his life there, but I think that's where he's from originally.
So, well, God bless Tim Keller, and we're thankful for his ministry and prayers for his family and church.
If you got any thoughts about Tim Keller, send them in.
Podcast at BabylonB.com.
Curious how many of you guys he's influenced.
And it's time for our bomb of the week.
Bomb of the week.
YouTuber stuck in an endless loop of reacting to his own reaction videos.
I like that.
Yeah.
That would make a fun video if we want Travis.
I want Travis to star in a video where he keeps reacting to himself.
I like the idea.
I do feel like it's one that almost works better as some get it to work as a video.
Yeah, it's a very visual joke.
I like the idea of just reacting to things as they're.
Yeah, like what's the word?
Picture and picture, like 25 different picture-in-picture boxes, and you can't even see his face anymore.
And I like it if there's just a two-second delay or something between something a second before or after Spaceballs.
Wasn't this a Space Balls gang?
I guess it's similar.
Yeah.
When will it then be fast forward the movie?
I think the worst aspect of reaction culture nowadays on social media is when people react to a video and they're like dueting the video or whatever they call it now, and you could see their face and there's zero reaction and they're just watching the video.
And then they'll be like, yeah, that was a good reaction.
It's just a way to hijack content.
It's just stealing stuff.
But it's just them watching the video.
I don't understand it.
Yeah.
I wrote this bomb, so I'm sorry.
I like it, Travis.
I didn't write the headline, just the article copy.
Okay.
Now, Travis likes the article.
Oh, sick.
Now, for the next minute, Travis is going to react to this segment.
Here we go.
Huh.
Huh.
This is going to be embarrassing when I tell them I wrote it.
Yeah, it's a visual joke, duh.
Classic.
Okay, that's it.
All right.
Presti was remember all of that.
Remember some actual points.
But with the brain injury.
Yeah.
I was told last week we were allowed to joke about it.
Yeah.
Speaking of people who can say words good, it's time for weekly news with Adam Jenser.
It's time for the weekly news with Adam Jenser.
The NAACP issued a travel warning for Florida claiming that Ron DeSantis' policies are openly hostile towards African Americans.
To make amends, DeSantis sat down and talked with an African American.
That's his Twitter Spaces interview, where after months of speculation, he officially announced that he's going to lose to Donald Trump.
Many Target customers are criticizing and boycotting the company for its Pride Month display, which features LGBT books and shirts for kids, as well as tuck-friendly swimsuits.
To rival Target, Jeremy Boring is releasing a non-woke line of tuck-friendly swimsuits.
A woman in the UK sued her boss for sexual harassment after mistaking common text abbreviations for sexual innuendos.
And don't even get me started on what in the UK means.
There are rumors that California Governor Gavin Newsome could appoint Oprah to the Senate if Diane Feinstein retires.
Of course, she'd first have to step down from her more powerful position as Oprah.
Kevin Hart is opening a plant-based fast food restaurant in Hollywood, or you can eat protein and grow to a normal healthy height.
Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen warned that if a deal isn't reached, the U.S. could default on its debt as early as June 1st, which would make her the first woman to break the glass debt ceiling.
A female high school athlete in California was bumped from the state championships after a transgender athlete took second place in a track meet.
Now, to be fair, the trans athlete practice very hard by waking up every day and running from the truth.
Jeff Bezos had a wooden sculpture that looks like his fiancée Lauren Sanchez installed on the prow of his super yacht, but still hasn't explained why his Blue Origin rocket looks like this.
A massive brawl broke out on Tuesday at Chicago's O'Hare airport.
Hopefully none of them were flying to Florida, where it's dangerous for black people.
That's it for weekly news.
To see more, subscribe to my YouTube channel and come see me live.
I'll be at the Looney Bin in Tulsa, Oklahoma, May 31st to June 3rd, and in Arizona, June 8th to 12th.
Ah, that was great, Adam Yancer.
Now it's time for more times people thought the Babylon Bee was real.
Have you ever thought the Babylon Bee was real?
These people did.
We've all seen our grandmas reacting to Babylon B articles on Facebook.
My grandmas are dead.
Whoa.
So are mine.
What a downer.
I have one.
So are mine, actually.
I have one living grandmother.
There's only one left between us.
We all generally have seen our one grandmother between us.
Yeah, Babylon B articles.
Older women.
Reacting and thinking that Babylon B articles are real on Facebook.
Now we're going to look at some of the funniest times people have thought the Babylon B was real.
We got some of these from the subreddit Eat the Onion, where you see people reacting to the onion, Babylon B and sides like that, and thinking they're real.
So here's a Babylon B headline.
BLM founder reminds everyone justice won't fully be served until she can buy a fifth house.
And we have a reply here.
Nice piece.
Where's the evidence to prove your wild claim?
Been watching Fox News too much.
Been watching Fox News.
She only has four houses.
Excuse me.
I was going to say that one is pretty cool.
It's actually kind of jealous.
All right.
Yeah, this is the headline.
The headline for this one was, Bibles pulled from shelves for outdated idea that all humans are of one race and made in the image of God.
And is this officially from Barnes?
Oh, no, this is commenter saying Barnes Black.
It just happened live.
Just so you know, I cut up my card five minutes ago after being a loyal customer since 1973.
If you won't carry the greatest book of all time, I don't care to buy what you think is better.
Books a Million is down the road.
Books a Million.
What is a loyalty card?
She had the same loyalty cards.
And what does it do for you?
It gives you like a 5% discount.
You get a discount or something.
What do you call them?
Like frequent customer points that you can get.
You get 5% off their 20% marked up profit.
That's not good.
So she cut it up.
Now she won't get those discounts anymore.
Oh, you want to read this one, Brandon?
Sure.
The Babylon B wrote, Starbucks unveils new satanic holiday cups.
And someone responded, of you drink from this cup.
It's all the same as saying bottoms up to Satan.
Be aware what the enemy is doing to destroy you.
Wonderful.
Bottoms up.
All right, this is the Babylon B headline.
Which one was this?
I have the headline is Pfizer.
Pfizer's ultimate plan allows you to get six free bioweapon injections every 12 months.
So that was the Pfizer subscription plan.
Oh, that's what it was.
Yeah, so it's like Pfizer introduces booster subscription service where you get the free subscription or free new updated booster every month.
And Stew Peters said, look at this expletive.
He's got a check mark.
But not anymore.
And it's the real Stew Peters.
It's the real one.
Yeah, not that other one.
I've always followed fake Stew Peters accounts thinking that's the real deal.
Yeah.
Well, it's tough.
You know, every time I'm on a roof, Stew Peters is like, no, I'm the real Stew Peters.
And then I shoot the real Stew Peters.
It's embarrassing.
All right, here's the headline.
AOC, the government must shut down unapproved news agencies to defeat fascism.
And this guy says, who exactly will approve these news agencies, rep Ocasio-Cortez?
The government?
Will they approve an agency that doesn't kiss Biden's expletive?
Shutting down unapproved news agencies is exactly what fascists do.
And apparently it went on, but the person who screenshotted this did not click the see more button.
So we'll never know what else.
I'm glad.
Yeah.
Here's a headline.
Biden thanks that handsome rep. How do you say her name, Rapino?
Rapino, I've heard her.
Biden thanks that handsome Rapino fella for his support of trans inclusion in women's sports.
And then someone commented on this one.
The president of the USA, facepalm.
From the Babylon Bee, Ilhan Omar, if Israel is so innocent, then why do they insist on being Jews?
And someone responded, Omar and Rashida Tlaib need to be voted out.
Wake up, people.
Now, it's not necessarily that they thought that was real.
Like, they might just be sharing it as commentary.
They might just dislike them.
But it does sound like it.
They probably have said that.
Yeah.
It's probably true.
All right.
This headline is Washington Post lowers flag to half staff for journalists suspended from Twitter.
And Travis, you want to see, what does this person see?
This person says, it's impressive.
Nope.
He says, it's impressive to see adults that work at the post act like screaming, kicking children.
Okay.
End quote.
Here's one.
Harriet Tubman honored with statue of her left big toe.
This was after that weird Martin Luther King Jr. hugged statue.
And someone responded, ask yourself if for some reason an artistic committee intended to honor you or someone else you hold in high regard and erected for that purpose a statue that bore greater resemblance to your intestines or appendages than to your visage or to your standing presence.
How honored would you feel?
I don't think there's another comment on the same one, too.
Can't be true.
Can't be true.
Who in their right mind would do such a thing?
Well, at least they were right.
It can't be true.
It wasn't.
All right, here's another one.
CNN report.
Evil Trump kidnaps three people from North Korean paradise.
I think this was after he freed some other great things Trump did.
Yeah.
I remember those days.
Yeah.
And then this says, leave the man alone, CNN.
Who is paying you for all this garbage?
The Clintons?
But this person lovingly corrected them and said, oh, well, it's a satire side.
And I believe Trump was able to get those three people back without releasing the Merchant of Death exchange, which is always a good idea.
Lesbian basketball player is always great.
He did write the book on making good deals.
Here's one.
The Babylon B headline is House Democrats draft legislation that would make it a hate crime to eat Chick-fil-A.
Someone responded, this dose make any sense.
What happened to our freedom?
People don't let legislation go through.
The country was built on Christian values.
We need to get that back.
I agree with the sentiment.
I agree with the sentiment.
I disagree with the graber.
Our country was built on Chick-fil-A, though.
True.
Heroes have given up on reading them.
I was trying to parse what the last words of this are.
Groundbreaking new studies suggest shutting down economy could contribute to like unemployment or something.
This was during the pandemic, yeah.
That's one of those.
Duh, really a stupid study had to be done.
Why is so much money wasted on ridiculous studies?
And who decides this?
I imagine that's exactly how they say.
The crazy thing is, those aren't like, even as a satirical headline, there are more ridiculous studies that have been conducted by the U.S. government, like whether or not there are invisible birds in Alaskan national parks.
Like, they've actually studied them.
We all know there are, so why even spend all money on that?
No study needed.
From the Babylon Bee, YouTube pulls all Seinfeld clips featuring the soup Nazi.
No soup Nazi for you.
And someone responded, respanded.
Respanded.
You can't just delete this like it never happened.
Well, apparently, you can if it hurts your feelings.
Wow.
And then some very strong ones.
Expletive is swear.
Is swear.
Yes, it is.
It is a swear.
He was explaining that these words are swears.
He's just swears.
I like this guy acting like the soup Nazi is a historical fact.
You can't delete it like it never happened.
It didn't happen.
Ron DeSantis is trying to remove the soup Nazi from our school books.
If you could go back in time and kill the soup Nazi as a baby, I would do that.
Because I would.
Bernie Sanders praises China for eradicating poverty by killing all the poor people.
It's the Babylon B headline, and someone shared it and said, Bernie is following Hitler's agenda.
Here's one.
Bernie Sanders takes a quiet moment to seek advice from portraits of his favorite dictators.
And there's Castro, Stalin, and Mao.
And then someone wrote, exactly with four exclamations.
Is that Castro or Trudeau over there?
They might just be.
It's the father, not the son.
They might just be sharing the joke.
That's not clear to me.
But here's one, the same one, the praising China for eradicating poverty by killing all the poor people.
This guy says, I really hope the man didn't really say this.
But I read the article.
Specifically, investigation.
They think they did.
They read the whole article.
I read the article.
It seems to me like there's a direct quote.
Just unbelievable.
And then a comment on it.
Just unbelievable that a socialist comic can run for president.
I think that's my favorite when it's like multiple people ganging up on the same misunderstanding.
This old classic, Babylon B, wrote, Trump, I have done more for Christianity than Jesus.
And someone replied, This is the most outrageous if-al statements, if-all statements.
Trump now thinks he is better than Jesus.
I will pray for him because Jay has overstepped.
He probably does think he's better, though.
All right, you get this one, Travis.
The Babylon B headline is Indiana Jones changes name to Land Stolen from Indigenous Peoples Jones.
And just in case, says, why do they have to do this stupid expletive?
Just make an expletive Indiana Jones movie expletive acronym.
You don't even want to say the acronym.
All right.
It stands for an expletive.
I don't know what that stands for, but I assumed it was for an expletive.
Yeah, it's first, it's for the sake.
Got it, got it.
All right, now it's time for hate mail.
You used to be good.
Adam Ford.
Adam Ford.
I really miss Adam Ford.
This is a Babylon B article.
Pride flag adds a big G for groomers.
And this guy, how he says, this is so hateful.
Y'all are perpetuating slander against a community that has experienced grotesque abuse at the hands of the very demographic you serve.
F all of y'all.
That's like a southern hate, like a Texan hate.
Y'all, yeah.
There's a lot of y'alls in there.
Here's one.
This is our headline.
Elon Musk apologizes to Magneto for comparing him to George Soros.
And Kaiser the Hater wrote, Are print writers back on strike two?
F.
This is some hacky ass.
Babylon B, Gandalf the White returns as Gandalf the Black upon hearing about $1 million reparations.
And Gandalf is beautifully rendered in a do-rag.
And Vasily Zaitsev, what the expletive is wrong with you people?
No question mark.
That was a statement.
Shortened to the point.
Well, thanks for watching the podcast today.
Stay tuned if you're a subscriber.
We had a green screen Kyle Mann contest, and we're going to see some people Photoshopped me in all kinds of positions.
I specifically asked your permission before posting that because I was worried that people would do other things.
It's all good.
So if you want to experience that and all kinds of wonderful stuff like subscriber headlines and further conversation, you got to become a Babylon B subscriber.
So go to BabylonB.com/slash blends and use the code podcast to get 20% off.
Here we go.
It's time for our only subscribers.
Coming up next for Babylon B subscribers.
I just put it up, but I didn't.
I was a little afraid to be like, hey, let's make it a contest because I didn't want to forget about it.
And it never had a winner.
But let's see what our creative subscribers and employees have come up with.
We keep putting headline contests up on the premiums section and then we forget that we put up the contest.
And people email me for weeks and they're like, when are you going to pick a winner?
And we never knew.
This has been another edition of the Babylon B podcast from the dedicated team of certified fake news journalists you can trust here at the Babylon Bee.