Bee Animation Takes Off, Baby Yoda Is Pro-Choice, Drones Get Woke News Show 11.20.2020
This is the Babylon Bee Weekly News Podcast for the week of 11/20/2020. In this episode of The Babylon Bee Podcast, Kyle and Ethan talk about the week's biggest stories like Disney cleaning up that shocking Mandalorian scene where Baby Yoda ate an unfertilized egg, Biden slapping some BLM stickers on attack drones, and Target making marketing decision based on single tweets. Get a behind the scenes look at The Babylon Bee's sweet new animation studio taking flight and listen to Kyle and Ethan talk about weird real news, stuff that's good, and glorious hate mail. Be sure to check out The Babylon Bee YouTube Channel for more podcasts, podcast shorts, animation, and more. To watch or listen to the full podcast, become a subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans This episode is brought to you by Faithful Counseling. Bee listeners get 10% off at that link! Introduction Kyle went to Texas and experienced Buc-ee's, guns, and freedom. Stuff That's Good Kyle likes Economics in One Lesson by Henry Hazlitt. Ethan likes the Roald Dahl Audio collection. Weird News Sri Lankan Lawmaker bites raw fish to bolster slumping sales After a coronavirus outbreak was traced back to the Central Fish maker in Colombo, the country's commercial capital, the fishing industry took a hit. "I am making an appeal to the people of this country to eat this fish. Don't be afraid. The coronavirus will not infect you," the lawmaker said, before taking a bite out of a raw fish Japanese Town Deploys Growling Robot 'Wolves' to protect residents from Bears With bear sightings at a five year high, and dozens attacks reported in Japan alone, city officials in the town of Takikawa on the island of Hokkaido Looking like a cross between Wolverine and the Terminator, each cyborg Canis lupus comes equipped with flashing red eyes, a blinking tail, and a repertoire of loud, threatening sounds—growls, roars, and heavy machinery noise—all triggered by motion detectors. School asks parents to stop throwing late students over closed gate The Trillade school in Avignon put up signs outside its gate showing a cartoon of a parent sending a small child airborne to get over the fence. The text on the sign asks parents not to throw their children Botched carving restoration on Spanish building ridiculed online A carved figure in the facade of a Spanish building is going viral on social media after an apparent botched restoration left the figure's face unrecognizable. The result of the restoration has drawn comparisons to the botched "Monkey Christ" fresco restoration in the town of Borja, as well as comparisons to the faces of a Tusken Raider from Star Wars and U.S. President Donald Trump. Video shows unauthorized man with flamethrower atop NYC bus A rapper who said he was making a tribute to a legendary New York City hip-hop group was recorded shooting a flamethrower from the top of an occupied city bus in an unsanctioned stunt a transit agency spokesman called "absurd, dangerous and just plain stupid. Dupree, who also refers to himself as the Flame G.O.D, posted drone footage of the effort. In an earlier Instagram post, he invited people to the area for ice cream, T-shirts and champagne Egg fight at Tesco after woman was shushed for two minute silence A woman was told to shush while other customers observed the silence in of fallen servicemen and women. However, she took umbrage at this. A witness heard someone shout "you've disrespected my mother" 7th Grade Language Art teach "living in the forest" and doesn't have adequate internet to host. Stories of the Week Disney Edits Controversial Mandalorian Scene So Baby Yoda Just Eats An Unborn Baby Summary: Disney has edited its controversial scene from The Mandalorian, where The Child eats an unfertilized alien egg, so that the creature affectionately known as "Baby Yoda" will simply eat an unborn human baby instead. Libs were mad that Baby Yoda ate an unfertilized alien egg. May we also add that the alien egg, along with Baby Yoda, and along with the entire plot and cast of Mandalorian, is FICTIONAL Buuuut abortion? Not so much. Gina Carano loves us Progress: Biden Administration To Apply 'Black Lives Matter' Decals To All Attack Drones Summary: Now this is progress: in a move to bring attention to issues of social justice in the United States, the Biden administration has announced that all attack drones used to bomb countries in the Middle East will have "Black Lives Matter" decals applied to them. Inspiring! We're not sure why everyone is acting like the Biden administration will be love, tolerance and rainbows. The Obama administration dropped over 26,000 bombs in 2016 alone. That's 72 bombs a day. Target Immediately Pulls Bible From Shelves After Church Of Satan Complains Summary: After the Church of Satan complained on Twitter that Target was selling Bibles, the retailer quickly apologized and pulled the Bible from its shelves. The Church of Satan complained that the book was "Satanophobic." Its tweet got 666 retweets, and Target jumped into action, immediately responding to the tweet that the book was pulled from shelves. We jest. But ACTUALLY: Target DID pull Abigail Shrier's book after one person complained. UPDATE: Target backpedaled again because a different trans person complained about censorship We later found out 40,000 Gamers DID sign a petition to remove the Bible from Target after the retailer decided to ban Grand Theft Auto V from their stores. Target said "we don't sell the Bible." Topic of the Week: Bee Animation Halloween ACB Satan song Hate Mail We got an email from someone who normally likes our stuff. Subscriber Portion Subscriber exclusive updates from The Babylon Bee Mailbag Gavin asks Kyle and Ethan about changes to old hymns. Bonus Hate Mail! Patrick or "laugh track" as he is affectionately called reads hate mail about his laugh. Subscriber Headlines of the Week Ethan's "friend" has a really funny story.
In a world of fake news, we bring you up-to-the-minute factual inaccuracy and a heavy dose of moral truth with your hosts, Kyle Mann and Ethan Nicole.
This is the Babylon B. Fake news you can trust.
Hi, listeners.
This is another exciting week because you get a Babylon Bee podcast delivered directly, injected directly into your eardrum.
Yes.
Like a warm turkey baster of audio dripping into your ear canal.
Seeping in.
Seeping in like my mother's eardrops.
We already have the vaccine for liberalism, and it's listening to the Babylon B podcast.
That's right.
Stop laughing so hard, Patrick.
We're going to get to that later.
We're going to get funny later.
Now we're going to get to hate mail about Patrick's laughing.
Yeah.
That's in the subscriber.
In the subscriber portion, you got to subscribe to hit that button.
Hate.
I would say that it's a vocal minority, though.
Like 99% of the people love the Patrick laugh.
Yeah, we get a lot of, I mean, people take the time to write a comment about something.
Yeah.
And so they represent probably like maybe like, I don't know how many people think one comment represents.
For one person that comments.
Well, it's like the polls where they poll a thousand people.
It's supposed to represent like 50 million people in a state or something.
Yeah.
So it's like 50 million people.
So one person represents like 3 million people who love Patrick.
Yeah.
That's a lot.
That's math.
Yeah.
So that's science.
That's like a billion people that like Patrick versus like maybe 3 million who don't.
That's still a lot of people that don't like him.
Yeah.
Imagine you have 3 million people.
Oh, man.
Well, welcome to the new normal, everybody, where you just listen to the, you stay in your home.
You get your food pill delivered to you.
You wear your gray space jumpsuit and you get the Babylon Bee delivered to your door.
Into your ear.
Into your, injected into your ear.
I'm Ethan, by the way.
Yeah, I'm Kyle.
Yeah.
So thanks.
I like how when we post these like on social, it's just like, join Kyle and Ethan is, and people are like, who the heck are Kyle and you?
I just follow him for the Babylon B. You have to just pretend like they're somebody.
Yeah, I'm like, oh, Kyle and Ethan.
I'll call if it's Kyle and Ethan.
And then they're like, oh, I got to know who Kyle and Ethan are.
People will like DM me some, like some comment about, you know, like what you do or whatever.
And I'll reply, thanks.
And then they'll be like, I can't believe you actually replied.
Like, I'm not really that famous or anything.
Anyway, so, hey, I actually escaped Comifornia.
Is that what boomers call it?
Comifornia.
I escaped and I went to Texas to speak at the Texans for Life event.
And I. Are there any Texans not for life?
There probably are.
Yeah.
Well, yeah, like millions voted for Biden, right?
Yeah, Texas is changing, huh?
Yeah.
Sad.
I mean, the gap was still hundreds of thousands of votes, but it's not that much.
So what'd you say?
I just said, hey, everybody.
Is that redundant?
Because they're already pro-life.
Don't kill babies.
Yeah.
I agree.
I agree.
But I visited my friend who moved from Texas or moved from California to Texas because of all the craziness out here.
And he's like, I want to show you the beauty and grandeur of Texas.
So we went shooting and got to shoot his AR-15, which is great because it has 30 rounds in the magazine instead of 10 like you have in California.
Oh, you could only have 10 here?
You only have 10.
And to like take the magazine out, you have to break the gun apart.
It's like crazy.
Because they kept trying, and they were trying to get around that with like the bullet button, and then they banned that, and they try to get around.
It's crazy.
So then on the way back, we stopped at Bucky's, which I don't know if you saw, I've posted pictures of this place, but it's this gas station that has like 100 pumps.
And you go inside and it's like as big as a Walmart.
It's like bee jerky.
But it's all just, yeah, it's just snacks.
And then they got a guy, they got a guy cooking up brisket in the middle of the place.
Wow.
And it's like the cleanest bathrooms you've ever seen.
And it's just.
I've never been to Texas.
Hey, Texas.
Invite me to something.
Yeah.
Ethan could speak at it.
This is the thing being the second line for like events because, you know, you always want, they don't never want to fly two guys to something.
It doubles the expenses.
We almost got to give our speech at Georgetown.
No, we almost got it.
I almost got to do something.
Yeah.
I'm here.
I want to eat.
I want to eat briskets.
We have an event, especially in Texas.
You want a less attractive, less popular.
But he's spoken at much bigger crowds than I have.
I have.
Comic-Con.
Yeah.
But yeah.
You got white-hatted in Canada?
I got white-hatted in Canada.
I've had my heyday.
Fantastic.
Well, if you're listening for the first time, thanks for joining us.
This is a podcast where we read Babylon Bee stories.
We tell you about weird news and we talk about stuff.
And you're just hanging out with the Babylon B writers.
You ready to jump in?
Always.
Cannonball.
But now, this week's edition of stuff that's good.
Oh, no.
Cannonball.
That was me getting splashed with the can.
All right, let's cute.
Okay.
Sounded violent.
Oh, gosh.
You have, like, PTSD from the Revolutionary War.
And from the Gatorball.
I got it.
Yeah.
Cannibal.
All right.
So today I'm going to talk about Economics in One Lesson, which is a very exciting book.
Not really.
It's pretty dry.
But it's by Henry Hazlitt.
And you can, it might be free online, possibly.
I know there's some.
It's in everything.
Yeah, it's true.
It's free on the Pirate Bay, but it's an old book.
And I can't remember if it's public domain.
I actually don't think so, but there are a few organizations that will give it away for free.
If you just pay shipping, they'll just ship it to you because they want people to.
Oh, it's like a Gideon Bible.
It's like the Gideon Bible for libertarians.
Okay.
This is what you open here, you go to your hotel room, you pull the drawer, and it's like Gideon Bible, Book of Mormon, economics in one lesson.
Okay.
And it's a fantastic book.
It's very dry.
I kind of expected it to be more like anecdotal with like analogies.
And it's not.
It's just, it's just Henry Hazlitt talking to you like you're stupid.
And he's just like, hey, you can't, you know, if you raise minimum wage, that's stupid.
And here's all the reasons why.
The famous quote from it is, the bad economist sees only what immediately strikes the eye.
The good economist also looks beyond.
The bad economist sees only the direct consequences of a proposed course.
The good economist looks also at the longer and indirect consequences.
So the biggest thing the book does is it tells you, like, when you look at a proposal and they're like, it's good.
The government built a factory here.
You don't see all the dollars that were taxed and then not spent.
You don't see the thing that did not happen.
Like the people that got taxed and now are not hiring people or are not building new businesses or not investing in things because that never happened.
So you don't see that cost.
It's an invisible cost.
And all you see is, oh, there's a factory that created jobs.
You don't see the indirect consequences of it.
So it kind of teaches you how to think that way rather than giving you all the answers.
Zombie apocalypse or something.
Yeah, just like that.
He uses that in the book.
Example.
Oh, you're trying to.
Okay.
Yeah.
Trying to help.
So anyway, if you want someone to tell you about economics like you're five, economics in one lesson is a good one.
It's all lemonade stands.
That's what I like.
I doubt if they used lemonade.
You need to start with the tuttle twins.
That would be a good book.
Economics, all and lemons, lemonade stand analogies.
That's just the tunnel twins.
Okay.
So just read the tunnel.
I think they have one where they start a food stand or a lemonade stand or something.
Well, mine is fun and wacky.
I'm a huge fan of Roll Dahl, you know, and I'm sure I believe he had a sketchy past or some bad beliefs or whatever everybody does.
But he's a character.
I didn't know that.
What did he do?
I don't know if there's like Rams.
Remember, I post like, I'm a huge Roll Dahl fan.
People are like, he was racist or something.
Oh, okay.
Anyway, I'm a huge fan of audiobooks read by the author.
And especially like when the author's a character and Roll Dahl's a character.
So there's a book called Roll Dahl Audio Collection.
It has Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James the Giant Peach, Fantastic Mr. Fox, a few other books.
They're all in one audiobook, and they're all read by the author.
And it's a great, once again, a great road trip book for the family.
He's very energetic.
It's just, it's fun to hear these characters as he would imagine them portrayed since he wrote it, you know.
And it's a little different than that kind of dry standard audiobook reader person.
Just a British guy.
Charlie, it's interesting.
Because books are already intimate.
You're in the author's head.
And then now they're like reading it to you directly.
It's just, it's cool.
It's a cool experience.
So highly recommend that.
Sweet.
Let's do some weird news.
This has been stuff that's good.
This news is weird.
I'm rushing through this so I can go play disc golf.
No, not everybody's out of this.
All right.
Sri Lankan lawmaker bites raw fish to bolster slumping sales.
So is this like the crazy used car salesman on TV?
I'm going to bite this fish.
If you buy my tires, like he sell fish or do you sell something else?
And he just doing the fish biting, you know, special.
I don't think so.
I think he sells fish.
I think that he's a lawmaker.
So the fishing industry has taken a hit and he says, I'm making an appeal to the people of this country to eat this fish.
Don't be afraid that coronavirus will not affect you.
That's not how Sri Lankans talk.
Did he hesitate?
But that's a used car salesman thing.
Did he hesitate before I bet it?
He's like, that weird burp sound there.
You don't get down here in the next 30 minutes.
I'm going to club a babysitter.
So he's threatening the fish's life.
I'm going to bite this fish in his head.
Alive?
It says raw.
Out of raw.
I assume it's like sushi.
I'm going to bite this rare exotic.
There's a picture where he laughs at his hand.
He's holding it up.
It looks like something you would buy at where Ralph's or whatever just going on the cob.
Like you buy the dead fish.
Yeah.
They say they have full fish.
I think so.
I think you can just buy like, oh, I don't know about Ralph's.
Okay.
Yeah.
I was thinking of like those Filipino markets.
Yeah, something like that.
Bunch of dead fish everywhere.
But it's not like pre-slot.
It looks like it's just a straight fish.
Yeah, straight up.
So is this kind of like when all the Democratic lawmakers were saying, like, you need to go to Chinatown?
And they're all eating shop in China.
And they're just standing there.
Yeah.
I just ate a scorpion.
Eating bats to.
Didn't we do that?
Oh, Acosta.
We had Acosta eat the bat.
Case the bat.
Yeah, that's right.
Yeah, okay.
Japanese town deploys growling robot wolves to protect residents from bears.
So bear sightings were at a five-year high.
There were dozens of attacks.
And they made a cyborg wolf.
Yeah.
It's got red flashing eyes, a blinking tail, and loud threatening sounds triggered by motion detectors.
So he's not like hiding in the woods and they're just sitting.
Just sitting there.
Yeah, just you walk by.
Do children walk past them?
So these poor bears are just like, oh, there's some trash.
Yeah.
Or they're like, it's just a wolf.
I'm a bear.
Bears aren't scared.
Oh my gosh, it's got red eyes.
We wanted to tell the bears human settlements aren't where you live.
Explained Okada.
Oh, ota, psyche, head, honcho, yuja, ota.
I probably butchered every word in there.
No further bear sightings have been reported, and as a result, the robot wolves are being regarded by all accounts as a howling success.
That's sad.
Wow.
Could we use these for other stuff?
We can market these.
It's never a good idea to make like a powerful robot because it will attack you at some point.
But this sounds just like a Disneyland type of robot.
It's like an animatronic.
Yeah, it's just motion.
It's like the Halloween robots.
Like you step on the spider, the little pad, and the spider goes by.
The deaf guy stands up and shakes.
This could become like an attraction for bears.
Like they want to like, ooh, I want to go get scared and go to the mic.
Take all the kids.
It's like a small, it's a small world for bears.
School asks parents to stop throwing late students over closed gate and just launching children.
It's like Matilda.
They put up signs.
We got to show this sign.
They have a sign that shows all those warning signs where it's like, don't, you know, do this.
And it shows you like punching a kid or something.
And it shows this gate and this parent hurling.
Just killing a child over the gate.
Just absolutely hucking it.
How strict are the rules of this school that you're doing that?
Shot putting your child over a gate.
It's like they have, you know, they got one more detention, one more tardy, and they get in trouble or something.
So the parents are desperate.
Oh, they lock the gate.
Yeah, so they close the gate and like, all right, no more students.
The parents are like running up.
No, Johnny's here.
How old are these kids?
Because that's hard on your back.
Yeah, you got to tell them to do the one, two, three jump, and then you go have them help you.
That's hard to get my kids into the shopping cart now.
Yeah.
And the really rich parents probably end up getting like a kid bazooka or a kid catapult.
Or they have their servants throw them.
The servants.
Alfred.
Hurl Johnny over the fence.
Botched carving restoration on Spanish building ridiculed online.
This one's all about the photo.
You got to see the photo.
This reminds us of the, oh yeah, the monkey Christ fresco restoration.
I don't know if you remember that.
There was a painting of Christ that some...
It was an old fresco, yeah.
Yeah, she came in and she restored it and it made him look like an orangutan.
Jesus is looking a little worse for the wear.
She just like completely painted a happy face on him type thing.
Holds like a Mr. Bean thing.
Hold my beer.
No, it was worse.
Like it made him like fat, round, fella.
It looks like a blowfish, like a weird ass little beady eyes, just like horrifying.
And it looks like the same artist did this one because it's got the same, just the head is just this round face and like the eyes look like mouths.
This is like a mouth and two more mouths, like something out of a sound garden music video or something.
Yeah, it looks like horrifying.
It looks like your kid took a ball of Play-Doh, rolled it up, and then just like poked his mouth in.
Oh no, they did eyelids.
Did you see the picture?
I did see it, yeah.
You know, I do kind of wonder if this is, they're starting to do this on purpose now, because I heard that that was, yes.
No, because I heard that that fresco that that Spanish grandmother did is now like a tourist attraction.
And so people are coming from miles.
You can see the freaky from around the world to take a picture of the Chubby Jesus.
Yeah, they look like the Insmouth them from that one.
Yeah, it's like a fish people from, what's that book?
It's Shadow Over Insmith by H.P. Lovecraft.
Lovecraft, yeah.
Freaky fish people.
I don't think I've ever laughed as hard as when I first saw that Spanish grandmother's restoration.
I remember I was working in my construction job, and my friend comes like, you gotta see this, and he pulls it up.
And it was one of those things where your cheeks hurt and you see the tears pouring down my face.
Terrible.
So, yeah.
I'm glad that this kind of stuff is still going on.
Video shows unauthorized man with flamethrower atop New York City bus.
So, is there so?
The first thing they asked, hey, are you authorized?
That's what I was saying.
Like, what does it mean to be an authorized man with a flamethrower?
Wait, wait, wait.
You don't look like one of our typical bus flamethrower personnel.
This is like Mad Max.
Like, he's got the big guitar that shoots the flames out of his giant sound system.
He said he was making a tribute to a legendary New York City hip-hop guy.
He's a rapper up there.
Was this one of what's his name's flamethrowers?
Elon Musk.
Elon Musk.
I don't know.
Is an unsanctioned stunt.
So you have to put the proper get the proper permits before you stand on a bus with a flamethrower in New York.
He refers to himself as the Flame GOD.
Okay.
What's that stand for?
G-O-D.
Oh, I don't know.
Is he the G-O-D?
The Flame G-O-D.
That Flame G-O-D.
Gangsta.
Oh.
I don't know.
I'm really disappointed in the people who write these articles on these weird news stories because we are asking the important questions.
Yeah.
And they don't ever go in and like, they don't explain why he was doing this or like where he got the flamethrower.
I want these questions answered.
In an earlier Instagram post, he invited people to the area for ice cream, t-shirts, and champagne.
You know, good flamethrowing.
Fantastic.
Eggfight at Tesco, which is a British supermarket.
It's like a British Walmart/slash grocery store or slash Best Buy.
Eggfight breaks out at Tesco after a woman was shushed for two-minute silence.
So like a moment of silence for the fallen heroes.
There's a phone service men and women.
She just keeps talking and all of a sudden, Peg hits her in the face.
It's like armistice.
Eggfight breaks out.
And it's such like a British, like, it seems like something would happen in like Mr. Bean or something.
She's like, why is everyone being so quiet?
We're being proper.
And all of a sudden, just like start throwing eggs at each other.
This is classic.
She's like, Golden Grams, does anyone know where the Golden Grams are?
Yeah, what is she doing?
And everyone's like, hey, shh.
She's on her cell phone.
What's she doing?
Oh, we're being quiet over here.
A witness heard someone shout, You've disrespected my mother.
Which I guess maybe the mother was in the service or something.
I wish they said mom.
You disrespected my mom.
And then someone shouts, food fight.
Is that I don't understand how it turns into an egg fight.
I was at an event in the UK.
I can't remember the city.
But this guy walks up to me and he goes, I was at my booth signing things.
And he goes, Ethan, picture with McGraham.
Like his sweet little British grandmother wanted a photo with me.
It was like, it was just the way he asked it, picture with McGraham.
That's my fault.
That's my story.
I like the idea that there's a UK grandmother out there that has this giant blown-up photo of you and her hanging above the fireplace.
Cute little.
That was awesome.
Seventh grade language art teacher living in the forest and doesn't have adequate internet to host.
So she sent a message to.
Oh, so this is what we need to read this tweet.
Okay.
So, this is, well, this is a parent of a student, and she says on Twitter, Well, this is new.
My seventh grader's language arts class today was canceled because her teacher is now living in the forest and doesn't have adequate internet to host.
I've attached this message my kid received an hour before class.
Oh, this email is beautiful.
Hello, all.
I'm currently living in the forest.
And so, when our power goes out, it's for most of the day.
My internet is enough to respond to messages, but not host live class.
I can't hardly read this.
Expected that you actually, oh, yeah, it's probably all details.
And she gives little details.
She goes, Well, I'm not going to be on, but I'll reply to your emails.
So, she's just out there with the seven dwarves hanging out or living like the Revenant.
I'm on a boat in the middle of the Pacific and don't really have good internet right now.
It's the craziest place you could go.
I live inside a giant mushroom, giant peach.
I'm warding off coyotes.
Internet's very good actually.
Giant stick.
Well, this was a pretty weird week for news.
Weird.
These are good.
My bad.
I'm going to say this is an 8 out of 10 in the weirdness scale.
Was that a recent story you really just found that?
That was the number one very first story on the weird news site.
I always check.
Just terrible.
All right.
Well, let's do some less weird news from the Babylon B. Every week, there are stories.
These are some of them.
Disney has edited its controversial scene from The Mandalorian, where the child eats an unfertilized alien egg so that the creature, affectionately known as Baby Yoda, will simply eat an unborn human baby instead.
Gross.
Instead of an egg.
So why was it controversial that was eating an unfertilized egg?
People were upset that Baby Yoda ate this egg.
Like there was this huge outcry.
And that's very stupid.
I heard he ate like a bunch of eggs or something.
Or is it one egg?
No, I think he just ate one.
Okay.
No, he didn't.
I only remember one scene where he goes up and he eats one and then the bounty hunter comes and finds him and is like, no, he closes the thing.
How many end of the episode?
Is he the end of the episode?
No, he didn't.
I remember Doug was saying they ate the ball.
Oh, I didn't realize he ate more than one.
So it shows what a fan I am.
I haven't even watched the third episode yet.
Do you think that where they were trying?
Yeah, I don't.
Because I thought that the people were saying it was like, oh, they're making all pro-choice because they don't care about eggs.
No, I think it was the pro-choice people who were upset.
Because it's why?
That's what I'm saying.
There's like this weird dissonance where that upsets them.
So there was.
Why does it upset them?
That's what I'm saying.
Okay, so the whole thing was this alien wanted passage to some other planet so that her mate prefer to watch the eggs.
Okay, we need to watch Mandalorian.
Let's pull up season one, episode one.
Let's go.
Just watch the whole thing.
Yeah, so is it like when they get mad when you eat eagle eggs or something?
Like, it's that kind of thing.
Yeah.
Okay.
But it's not real.
It is fictional.
Baby Yoda's not real.
So not only is Baby Yoda not real, the egg is not real.
Eating a prop.
It's a fictional race of aliens in a fictional galaxy.
Right.
It might even just be CG.
I don't know how they did it.
I'm sure it was all CG.
Maybe you would.
I know they have a puppet, but I don't know if it's always a puppet anyway.
They're normalizing.
Yeah.
So anyway.
Well, you know, there's a huge star named Gina Carano.
Yeah, Carano.
Carano, who's in Mandalorian, the show that I watch all the time.
You're absolutely nailing this.
She loves us.
She does.
Babylon B.
Yeah, she keeps like sharing.
She's all famous and she loves.
She's watched, like, partakes of things I do, but I don't watch her thing.
It would be really good for us if we all watch it.
All four of us.
Everybody watches it here, but for you.
I saw one episode.
Yeah.
Oh, so good.
I don't know why I don't like.
I don't know why I get that.
It's like old Western.
I probably like all her parts.
She was great.
She's probably nice.
I didn't mean, I meant like scenes.
We're never going to get her on the podcast.
She's going to be canceled by.
Well, that's the thing is like she keeps upsetting everybody because she shared something that was like questioning the use of masks.
And then she put in her bio, her pronouns are beep, bop, boop.
That's anti.
Which is a very funny joke and it's cute.
It's just a cute.
It's not even like an offensive joke in any way.
Well, then she announced that she has a parlor account.
So that's dog whistle.
So it's like racist.
Yeah.
Oh, so you joined the KKK.
Yeah.
Basically the same thing.
But we're waiting.
We really wanted to be a controversy that she keeps sharing in Babylon B articles because that would be really good for us.
That was a controversy.
So you keep doing Star Wars stories up and showing.
I'm going to create all these sock puppet accounts and be like, I can't believe Gina Carano keeps sharing Babylon B, a racist satire.
And then we'll see if we can get the controversy going.
If you're a liberal, if you're a progressive, you got a progressive Twitter account, you follow us.
Start the controversy.
Get it going.
But then if she got fired from the show because she was sharing Babylon B articles and we started, you know, I would feel really bad.
Yeah.
How's that?
You have to like what drives her to be so that outspoken and how because she's got like a crazy good job right now.
I know.
Well, good for her.
Yeah.
No, I think it's great, but I'm curious, like, it's just her personality or she came from like MMA, I think, originally.
Okay.
So she's probably.
I mean, she's from a different culture where it's just not so people aren't as uptight about that stuff.
Yeah, and maybe leans more to the right, too.
Yeah.
Well, yeah, I mean, I assume she leans to the right, but like.
No, I'm just saying.
A lot of people lean to the right.
But in the MMA culture, you know, the MMA culture probably more leans to the right.
Yeah, so she's from that.
She's used to that.
And probably they have thicker skin where you can just talk about.
Because there's people who are conservative in Hollywood.
There's probably a pretty good percentage.
But they're just like, oh, I can't see anything.
All the quiet ones.
Yeah.
Anybody who doesn't talk in Hollywood, probably conservative.
Yeah.
They don't walk around.
You're saying that from experience.
All right.
Yep.
All the quiet ones.
All right.
Oh, now this is progress.
In a move to bring attention to issues of social justice in the United States, the Biden administration has announced that all attack drones used to bomb countries in the Middle East will have Black Lives Matter decals applied to them.
Inspiring.
That was really good.
Thanks.
You want to do that one more time?
Like just more emotional?
This is the thing that makes me the saddest about the Biden administration thing because whenever there's a Republican in office, at least the media like points out all the wars that we're going to and all the bombs that we're dropping.
And then a Democrat gets into office and they're just like, complete quiet, complete silence about it.
I mean, Obama got the freaking Nobel Peace Prize before he did anything.
Yeah.
The Obama administration dropped over 26,000 bombs in 2016 alone.
Do the math.
I think that's about 72 bombs a day.
Wow.
Good job.
Did you see that?
Who was the guy that was in Afghanistan saying he's been lying to the president about how many troops are there?
Did you see that?
He's like, oh, yeah.
He's like laughing about it.
Like, oh, you know, we were tricking Trump to, so he thought that we were taking troops out, but we had a bunch of troops he didn't know about.
It's like, who is it?
Syria.
Syria.
Dan's like fact-checking me, Snope style.
It's not in Afghanistan.
It was Syria.
But I was close.
It was morally true.
Dan is always the one more qualified to be on the show than I did.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
He actually pays attention to stuff.
They just picked us for our good looks.
So I think the Biden administration is bad news for peace, but hey, at least the Middle Easterners will be proud, you know, they'll be bombed by a black woman of color.
Wait, you have to be black, a progressive woman of color, pro-LBGT for the first time.
Do you think that Black Lives Matter has provided Cazertas with a third joke?
Because now we have, we can always paste Black Lives Matter on stuff.
And then that becomes a new joke.
It's a new joke.
That's a good idea.
We do it a lot.
Yeah, we've done it a couple of times.
So it's our new third joke.
It's the third joke.
Yeah.
Breakthrough.
Research breakthrough.
I think in my Twitter bio, it says, I'm tirelessly working to create a third conservative joke.
That's my mission in life.
We've got to make up a fourth one.
But yeah, this is actually why I went out and voted for Trump.
It was just the big one.
The war.
Do you know how many bombs a day he dropped?
He dropped a lot.
Oh, really?
Yeah, but I think a lot of it was kind of just left.
I didn't hear about that in the news either.
So where's your premise?
They did.
They screamed about it all the time.
I never read the news.
But then when he started, well, that's what in the beginning, that's what they screamed about.
And then he starts saying, you know what?
We should start taking troops back.
And then they start screaming about that.
Oh, this is violating American norms.
We're supposed to be in the Middle East forever.
And how dare he?
And freaking out about it.
Whatever he does.
Whatever he does, they're just mad about.
Yeah.
What was it saying?
Anyway, I just thought he was our best chance to start reducing troop levels because we rejected Ron Paul.
We turned our back on him.
I love the studio audience.
You've been cast into the outer darkness for turning from all those open arms.
Now I have now a video of me saying, I voted for Trump.
And now that's going to get isolated.
And I'm going to be put on a list.
Yep.
What did AOC say?
Like, there's a bunch of videos that are going to get deleted.
This is one of them.
Videos that are going to get deleted?
Yeah, she was saying she predicts a lot of people are going to start deleting their tweets and videos because they don't want to admit that they voted for him.
She's like, we got a list.
Is anyone archiving these things?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you remember that?
Like when Obama got elected and suddenly was like scary, it was scary for a while and they admit that you voted against him.
It is weird, huh?
Yeah.
Maybe we're just feeling what the lips felt.
I don't know if it feels, it won't feel as bad with Biden, though.
I don't think.
Because Obama was like, you didn't want the first black president, inspiring figure.
It's like, well, just like even the people who voted for Biden kind of hate Biden.
Yeah.
It's just they hated Trump more.
And it's funny that they can do that and they like they can chew their company.
They're all talking chew gum too, but like they can't see us doing that on this side.
You're just making a compromise.
Well, this guy's not great.
It's more we just, yeah, you suck.
So we're voting for him.
Just think of how bad it has to be that we vote for Donald Trump over your guys.
Like, just think about how bad that is.
That's how stupid you guys are.
These big dummies.
I thought you were going to start reading and started drinking.
Yeah, oh, yeah, it's my turn.
Sorry, I thought it was yours.
So, after the Church of Satan complained on Twitter that Target was selling Bibles, the retailer quickly apologized and pulled the Bible from its shelves.
The Church of Satan complained that the book was Satanophobic.
Satanophobic.
The tweet got 666 retweets, and Target jumped into action, immediately responding to the tweet that the book was pulled from shelves.
So this is a joke.
This is a joke based on real thing.
But it was based on a true thing, which is that Abigail Schreier's book got pulled from Target after one person complained about it.
Yeah, just one person.
That's the thing.
It's like, this is the Church of Satan.
It should be one Satanist.
She wrote this book that's about what she calls the transgender craze, which upset a lot of people in the trans community.
But it was like, I think she's even pro-trans herself.
Like, she believes that it's okay to transition and all this.
But she was questioning that there's a sudden spike in people identifying as transgender, especially among females, just in like the last five years.
So all of a sudden, you have, you know, within the last five years, all these, it was historically almost nobody, almost no girls would transition to boys.
Yeah.
And all of a sudden it was just like tons, you know?
Yeah.
So she was investigating whether this is part of like the social pressure.
All of a sudden, you get some kind of benefit or social points for being transgender.
So she was kind of investigating that.
And they were not happy about that.
I didn't like that.
And I saw everybody that was like commenting on it.
Obviously, had never read it.
As I haven't, as many of them.
But I'm also not complaining about it.
But it is psycho that Target would just completely take her book down because of one tweet.
One person.
It was literally like, like they posted Ask Target is a Twitter account.
They said, hey, why is this horrible book up?
This person's transphobic.
And they're like, oh, they are.
And they just said, okay, we'll take it down.
One guy on Twitter.
And then later, someone else was like, hey, what about free speech and just having different visits?
I don't have the actual tweet.
I think it's right here in the notes.
I could read it.
And Ask Target was once again tagged.
And they go, oh, okay.
Yeah, we'll put it back up.
So it's like they got one guy there running that account and was like just responding directly to each person and changing the entire store's policy based on what they say.
They're just going to be constantly like pulling your shit, pulling books, putting them back up, pulling them up.
Oh, gosh.
So we complained.
So yeah, one trans person complained about the book.
And then this other person who complained was also a trans person.
So this guy said, he's a trans man, a conservative trans man.
He says, notice how quick they were to respond to other transgender people.
I've also sent an email to the corporate office, zero response.
I'm currently on the phone with Target to get my voice heard.
And so far, nothing.
And then they replied, Yesterday we removed the book from target.com based on feedback we received.
We want to offer a broad assortment for our guests.
We're adding this back.
We apologize for any confusion.
Confusion.
And we apologize that you guys were confused because we were just doing normal stuff that Target does.
It's just a normal thing we do, but sorry you guys are all so confused about everything.
I don't know why you guys are so confused.
I mean, it's not confusing at all.
So apparently, 40,000 gamers did sign a petition to remove the Bible from Target.
This happened a while ago.
This is a real thing that happened.
Oh, gamers.
It was after they decided to ban Grand Theft Auto 5 from their stores.
They're like, oh, what?
Well, you still have the Bible.
Leave it to gamers to make that connection.
And then it says, Target said, we don't actually sell the Bible.
And then I think they do on their site.
Well, they do online, but they were probably trying to get online.
In their online store, they literally sell everything.
They're trying to get a store for Amazon.
Yeah.
Like, you can probably sell something on Target.
Yeah.
No, I have my books on there, I think.
Maybe.
Maybe not, actually.
I'm going to complain.
You do it.
Know that Ethan Nicole works for the Babylon B, which is hateful.
Disgusting garbage human.
Oh, I do need to be trans though.
I need to create a track.
Yeah, they don't listen to you unless you're trans, I don't think.
I like that this like conservative trans man like just totally pulled the trans card.
He's like, I'm trans too.
Yeah, we totally need some intersectional identities to be able to do that kind of thing.
Because we don't have anything.
You just like Native American card.
I'm a card key.
That's Native American.
I am.
I literally have it in my wallet.
I'm trying to think of something.
Intersectional identity I have that's like character.
Cherokee.
I'm a fan of the 1983 movie Kroll.
As a Kroll fan.
What about the Kevin Sorbo one?
Oh, wait, no.
He Cole the Conqueror.
Cole.
I've never seen Cole.
Cole and Kroll are different.
I've been meaning to watch Cole because they could do a movie together.
Cole and Kroll.
Cole.
You could have Cole go to Kroll, like Cole does Kroll.
Or Cole.
Wait, is Cole a place?
Kroll is a planet.
Oh.
I thought Kroll was a guy.
No, Cole is the guy.
Cole the Conqueror.
So Cole goes to Kroll.
Cole goes to Kroll.
let's do our topic of the week Let's do it.
Make counseling great again.
That's what I always say.
Yeah.
Because, man, it's really gone downhill lately.
Yeah.
All those atheist counselors, Satanist counselors, demonic counselors.
Yeah.
You don't want that.
So you're looking for a counselor that has read their Bible.
Yeah.
That knows what a Bible is.
Yeah, at least knows.
At least has it on their shelf.
Yeah.
It's like, oh, yeah, Jesus.
I've heard of that guy.
Right.
Things are hard right now.
Quarantine.
You may be locked down.
You might be depressed.
Depression's way up.
I feel sorry for people without families.
I don't think about that.
It's like, you're just like, I got nobody.
Yeah.
Imagine people locked in their houses for months with nobody.
Yeah.
What you might need is some faithful counseling.
Faithful counseling is online professional Christian counseling to deal with depression, stress, anxiety, crises of faith.
Correct.
You can text, you can chat, you can phone, you can video anything.
Because, you know, a lot of us, we have our certain method of communication we prefer.
I hate when people want to talk on the phone to me.
I would text a counselor.
Yeah, I like texting.
I don't know if I want to go show up in person.
But it's affordable.
Faithfulcounseling.com slash Babylon B. Listeners get 10% off your first month.
Yeah.
Do you think counselors use emojis?
Probably lots of smileys.
Yeah.
Like they probably wouldn't send a lot of like crying.
Yeah.
Well, maybe they're trying to sympathize.
Like you're like, oh, I'm so sad today.
And they would send the sad.
I would feel good about that.
I feel weird about a counselor using emojis, but it's to each their own.
They probably accommodate what they're doing.
But we're not guaranteeing that they use emojis because anything we don't know.
But it's not, yeah, that's not a guarantee that they make.
But you can get started today.
Faithfulcounseling.com slash Babylon B. Do it now.
Now.
And now, the Babylon Bee's topic of the week.
All right, everybody.
If you notice that Ethan has bags under his eyes and just generally is less coherent these days, it's because he stays up till like 3 a.m. every day working on animation.
And we had someone at our studio the other day that was like, where's your, or at our office the other day that was like, where's your animation studio?
And we pointed at Ethan's office.
We're like, right there.
That's where it all happens.
Almost of it.
So we wanted to just kind of walk you through some of the B animation that we've done recently.
It's like the behind the scenes.
And I don't know exactly what our plan is for this.
We're going to play them and then we're going to talk over them or something.
Yeah, the whole animation thing started with like, I mean, I had been wanting to do it.
Yeah.
We had a fan named Austin Robertson who just started sending us audio that was so I just I could see the cartoon when you'd send this audio in.
And I think the first thing we did was, what was the very first thing we did with him?
It wasn't animation.
It was the animation.
The weather, the weatherman, the murder front.
Murder front.
I thought we did something before the Grinch one with Gavin.
Oh, that's right, where it was just the song.
Yeah, it was just, yeah, it was just like a poem.
So, and then he sent in, he just started sending us our own stories read in his newscaster voice.
And so I go, we could make a card, just a simple cartoon out of this, just like talking heads, you know, that I could crank out in a week.
Well, before that, you had been showing me these little puppets you were doing.
I was working on ideas on your animation thing of like, oh, we could have Nancy Pelosi yapping if we ever wanted to like animate it.
And he's got this horrifying Nancy Pelosi whose mouth is like doing this.
She moves when you move.
Oh, yeah.
And so I could talk to the computer and it was like, a lot of behind the scenes experiment.
We have to pass it to find out what's in it.
And she's going like this.
So I saw this as a very producible way to just get these going.
And so we made the first one, which is the Chicago Murder Front one.
And it was just talking heads.
But even then, it immediately became more complex than what I had planned to do because there's always something funnier you can do with another visual.
Yeah, it's kind of on you.
Yeah.
I mean, that in a good way.
You know, I'm me.
Because you see the scene and you're like, okay, that works.
If I see it, that will make it better.
I can't not do it.
That's the hard part.
Yeah.
So, I mean, we, as soon as we made that one, we went, hey, let's do a weekly.
And huge mistake.
And pretty quickly, as soon as we started doing that, we started realizing we can do characters, we can do things we can't do in the articles.
So we can have characters that can like interact, hate each other, you know, just have do different, do stuff that you can't do.
So we started playing with those character ideas and stuff.
So that's when we brought Bridget Fetti on to do Samantha, one of our news anchors.
So anyway, it grew very quickly.
It became crazy producing these things one week at a time.
But it's been a blast because it's something I've wanted to do.
You know, I just never had the bandwidth.
So thanks for the opportunity.
Hey, where'd you get the idea for potato?
Everybody loves potato, man.
Yeah, people like them.
Well, yeah.
We need the potato plushie.
Brian Stelter.
You squeeze it and the bow tie spins.
Yeah.
He needs the bow tie.
Yeah.
We need it.
Yeah, that was another one.
He was supposed to be simple, but I just gave him like 6,000 facial expressions.
Just way too much.
He's fun.
He's fun to watch.
Yeah, originally he was supposed to be kind of like a joke on Brian Stelter, but I don't like doing impressions.
Yeah, it's not supposed to be him.
Clearly him, it's just the idea of like he's just kind of like this.
That's what spawned it.
Like, why do they mainly like you look at Brian Stelter and go, is it Stelter or Stettler?
Stelter.
Stelter.
You look at him and go, why is he on there?
Like, why does anybody watch this guy?
Or like, how'd he get hired?
It doesn't make any sense.
In my mind, it's just like that.
Why did they hire a potato?
It doesn't make any sense.
He just yells and weird.
That's it.
So, yeah.
So speaking of getting out of hand, we want to, I don't know what order we want to watch these in, but it kind of all culminated in our, you know, we started trying to take on more complex ones.
And I have a few people that help with some of the minor parts of the animation.
Then we did this Halloween special.
Have we talked about the Halloween special on the show or did we just release it?
I'm sure we mentioned it, but I don't think we went all in depth on it.
You want to watch it?
Let's watch it.
Let's watch it.
Halloween special.
Go.
Mom, do we have to go to school today?
Yes, Cooper.
Of course you do.
You know America was born in 1699-776.
It's a reframing.
It's true.
It explains the same.
What the?
Wait, pause it, Dan.
Hey, Rebecca, what's the name of that?
Whose kid was that in the beginning?
I think that was Frank Fleming's kid.
Oh, one of Frank's kids.
Yeah, one of Frank's kids.
One of Frank's many, many children.
Yeah.
Yeah, I want to say it was Frank's son.
So this idea might have been little Frank.
I can't remember.
The idea for this came from...
Is he having a little Frank?
Maybe.
Maybe.
Frank Jr. 2.
The idea for this came from one of our animation writers who does a lot of our work.
He's an excellent writer.
He has worked in, he currently works in animation.
That is why he does not want to be named.
Yeah.
And what I love about this one is it's just exactly how it feels on Twitter.
Yeah.
That you're just like minding your own business on Twitter and you say whatever and someone comes along like, America was actually founded in 1619.
And you're just like, just exactly how it feels.
I was getting ready to show this, an early version of this to my wife, the rough animatic I had done.
And she is like, you know, our daughter just came in and just blurted out this like thing about fetuses being parasites or some crazy thing.
Like, where did she get this stuff?
And I'm like, well, actually, can't you relate to this?
All right, continue.
That actor in that show I like.
You need to be more specific, Dad.
You know, the one that's on the 830, or maybe it's not.
That means I was personal prime.
She thinking all of it wrong.
I like the Terminator influence.
Did you see Gary's?
Hey, there's me.
That's my voice.
Yeah, he did it.
It's the funniest demon.
Gavin animated him to look like.
What is that?
Trill Stone Solomon Zone has never been pride, but the monster is on the pride.
I like that the hallway was long enough for him to say all that.
Thirsty little flowers.
You can't be phrases toward white people!
when someone who disagrees with me politically dies!
I'm an cat menstrual!
That was you, right?
Yeah.
RSI! RSI! RSI! RSI! RSI! RSI!
Quick!
Inside!
There's our hero.
You'll be safe here.
I'll protect you from the crazies.
Old timey music, though.
We need to sell that most.
Hey, America.
You know, the only thing holding black people back is they won't pull themselves up by their bootstraps.
Subscribe.
So that was a.
We had a little under two weeks to get that thing done.
It was a project, man.
Let's talk about that ending.
I'm offended.
That was funny to see.
That was like the total test of like people can take a joke.
Or if they watched all the way to the end.
Yeah, or if they watched all the way to the end.
Yeah, it's totally true.
We talked about doing different endings where it's a little more mild where he says something like, well, you know, the earth is flat or whatever.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Maybe it's more mild because We do get a lot of hate when we insult Trump supporters or something, I guess.
But we decided in the end we just had to go right for the jokes.
Yeah, we had to go.
We were totally shredding the other side.
So we had to.
We had to do, we had to be fair, fair and balanced.
Yeah.
But yeah, so three main animators worked on that.
Plus, so like we each took chunks.
I did the majority of it.
But that was, it was crazy to work on.
I was really proud of how it turned out, though.
I mean, it's the most ambitious thing I've worked on so far.
When you're doing these animations, how much of it changes from the time you write the original radio play or you record the original radio play and you start animating on top of it?
And then how much changes after that?
Like you're adding jokes?
Are you adding?
Mainly, well, luckily, the guy that wrote this, who cannot be named, wrote an amazing, he just nailed it on this.
He nails his scripts are almost always pretty good.
Like they're pretty much ready to go, which is hard to find.
And we'll just, we'll name him Keevin Kielberg.
Keevan.
We're not saying his name sounds like that, but it's not.
Keevan.
Keevin Kielberg.
Keevin.
So yeah, so first thing we did is record a rough radio play.
So we just do all the voices and then create an audio version of the whole thing.
And then I do like a scribbled out radio play test.
I can actually, you could throw some of that up there.
You can kind of see the process.
So that kind of times out the whole thing.
So we can start animating before we get all the final voices recorded.
But it times it out to that.
So we got that done.
I think the main thing that changes over it is just the subtle a lot of jokes, visual jokes are worked into, they call it the animatic, when I kind of scribble across the audio and do kind of a rough draft of the whole thing.
And then, yeah, I think I'm trying to think of like any, you know, there's also jokes that kind of get out and on, like when you add, you know, the guy's house, there's little funny pictures on the walls and stuff like that.
But it's the audio is locked in pretty early on because all the animation is timed to us.
You mess with it, it just messes with everybody's, you know, you'll have start having people killing themselves.
So you want that radio play to be as tight and final as you can.
Yeah.
Interesting.
Well, tell me more about that.
Fascinating.
It's basically like all other animations made.
So, you know.
So, but this is much more South Park schedule than Simpsons schedule.
Right.
Yeah.
And that was the other thing.
I was like, I'm just going to do South Park level animation.
And it quickly, I couldn't bring myself to do it that limited.
Like, you know, and I think that this idea for this family Halloween sketch was out of an idea for, there's kind of this dream project that I think a lot of us here would like to do would be our version of a South Park or a Simpsons or something.
Yeah, we have a family.
So this is our first one with them.
But we released one this week with the same family, which was one of our first ideas.
I think me and Frank were talking about this idea.
Like, wouldn't it be so cool if we could do like a Simpsons type show?
And one of the first concepts we came up with, we were talking about what are some things you go through as a family where it feels like you're just trying to be normal, but the world around you is insane.
And one of the ones I thought of was our daughter wanted to go to like the post-Malone concert.
She never heard of him, but her friend was going and their family was all going and bringing like their five-year-old and stuff.
Just, I don't know, as far as we could, we checked the lyrics out and stuff.
Like, this is like terrible.
Yeah, I'm a pre-millonialist.
I'm pre-millonialist.
And, you know, it made us feel like we're the crazy ones because we're like, don't think a 12-year-old should go to this concert.
Yeah.
Maybe.
And so we can have this idea of like, what if, you know, your daughter really wants to go to a concert and it's Satan.
I think you just take your exact experience of talking to your daughter and you just put Satan in place of the art Satan in there.
Because that's how it feels, right?
Well, that's what I love about these cartoons.
Like, it expresses like a feeling in this crazy world, right?
The Halloween one, I think, nails it.
And we got to add that we're going to watch this, but it is Satan one.
But we got to add that Ethan went to a professional recording studio and recorded this entire song called Kill Your Parents for this.
And that's stuck in my head.
So let's watch the Satan one.
Very sitcom.
Dad.
Can I please, please, please go to a concert with Stephanie tonight?
Sounds fun.
What's the band?
Did your daughter record these lines or is that fetasine?
That's where you just listen.
This is Satan.
No way.
Nope.
Not happening.
Please, Dad.
I heard he had a rough past or something.
People can change, right?
You want a Grammy.
He's doing the music for Disney's live-action remake of Oliver and Company.
It's Disney.
It's Satan.
Let's all just calm down.
We should hear her out.
Our parents didn't like our music either.
You even went through a slipknot phase.
It's not a phase.
It's a way of life.
But this is different.
That's my favorite.
Satan might make great music.
It's all downhill from here.
No, he's Satan.
I mean, let's just look at some of the song titles.
Release the murder hornets.
Yeah, he's an animal rights activist.
Is racism that bad, really?
He's starting a dialogue.
Push old people.
Push them toward a healthy retirement.
Kill your parents.
Kill your parents?
What?
It's a metaphor.
Let's just listen to it and see.
It's pretty harmless so far.
Everybody listen up.
Stop doing.
Kill your hands.
Kill your hands.
This is not a metaphor.
It doesn't have to be a troll.
Honey, you're getting older and more mature, and we're not going to be able to control the content you consume forever.
So I can go.
No, of course you cannot go to the concert with the devil himself as the headliner.
Dad, look, your dad and I are cool.
We like that Satan plays soft pop.
Make a final decision.
Let's listen to someone.
Instead of rocking a roller rapper.
Okay, Khan.
She kills us.
Pro.
She likes us for like a day.
Khan, we will be dead.
Pro, we go with her, and you can justify wearing your jean jacket again.
Unlike previous generations, our fashion will never go out of style.
All right, you can go, but we go with you.
Dio.
I'll get my jean jacket.
Can you promise this is all just art and not something we should be worried about?
I swear on my iPhone's life.
It's not one shot.
I guess it wasn't a metaphor after all.
This is growing on me.
Satan knows how to drop a beat.
Kill your parents.
Kill your hands.
This is not the metaphor.
Doesn't have to be a trouble.
Kill your famous kill your hands.
I like me.
I'm beginning to agree.
I like the mom, Dad, it's just a metaphor.
This is not a metaphor.
Yeah, that's the other part of the.
There's another line of argument in there where that got cut from the script where she's like, I wouldn't even know how to kill you.
Like, I can't work a gun or anything like that.
Like, it'd be too complicated.
And the song, it's like, it doesn't have to be complicated.
And it talks about you just grab a kitchen knife, be serrated.
And it's like, you can just use household items.
It's really simple.
Is that in the full song?
Yeah.
So the full song you can find on YouTube.
It links it at the end there.
Has YouTube not told our song?
YouTube has not censored our Kill Your Parents.
So far, they haven't.
Yeah.
I'm curious.
So we get censored for like talking about COVID or politics or this or that, but we post a song called Kill Your Parents.
I'm curious if you put it on by Satan.
Because you can do the auto-generated closed captions.
I wonder if YouTube can tell that we're saying you kill your parents.
Right?
Because it like, because that's what it bases it off of.
All right.
The audio didn't even recognize it because the way we're singing, it's like Pamela.
So maybe it sounds like parrots or something.
Yo, hey, kill your Paris.
Yeah, so yeah, there's like 10 seconds of the song in there.
I went into the studio and I just had this stock pop song, and we were just going to do the chorus in a verse, but then realized, like, well, then you just copy the chorus.
You got a whole song.
It's so close to being done.
And so I did all these, I did all the male vocals on it.
And then I knew the guy at the studio, his daughter, she's like 14, but she has an amazing voice.
And like, she wants to throw a few vocals on there just to kind of back it up.
So then he sends me the file later in the day.
I'm like, holy cow, this thing turned out.
It's like radio quality.
Sounds awesome.
So catchy.
That one did have some jokes added towards the end.
Like I felt like it needed just a bit more.
So kind of like that slip-knot moment.
I added that right kind of last minute.
Still like it needed that, like, you know, adding the Disney theme when she talks, just adding little things.
With, you know, part of it is the breakneck speed with which we're producing these things.
If we had the time, you could really kind of storyboard it out and like be like a joke could go there, cram in more jokes.
But anyway, self, I'm self-criticizing.
And the animation is like that setup is a lot probably a lot easier than something like the Halloween one because most of it is standing in the middle.
Well, the Halloween, everything has not been created yet.
So the least on this one is created, but the listen was way more work than I thought it'd be.
Yeah.
Because you just need to, it's boring if they just stand there and don't do anything.
Yeah.
Or if they just talk and their mouth moves.
Like it's just not enough.
You need their eyes and everything to do stuff.
And then there's a lot of the animations just whole, you know, you can make one mistake and it messes the whole file up.
And then there's glitchiness of these programs and stuff.
There's just all this stuff that is not interesting to talk about that you spend an entire day on.
So when are we going to get some Korean animation slaves?
Yeah, I don't know.
That's up to Seth, I guess.
Yeah.
What I really, I mean, if you're watching this and you're like, if you're an animator and you're, especially if you're a good artist, you got timing, people like that, I'm looking for people like you.
You want to, you know, I don't know at one point we'll be able to afford you, but come out of the woodwork.
Send us a message.
So let's this one.
I really like the Halloween one.
I can't decide if I like the Halloween one or this one best.
We're doing all our darkest, most psycho ones.
Let's do that.
I mean, we could just do one of the normal news ones, but I mean, people get that.
Yeah.
They've probably seen those.
We could do, yeah.
Well, we should do this one because this is our top performing one besides.
Well, I think also, I guess we really did start better cops is really our first one.
Oh, yeah.
Because that was kind of our test, kind of trying to test out the animation.
And then our news show, which we're calling Babylon News Network at the time, or right now, kind of just jumped the gun.
We just started doing that.
Yeah.
Because you got to just start doing it.
Just had to.
Just went for it.
All right.
This is Amy Coney Barrett holds up a crucifix and we'll see what happens.
I'm Guy Curtis.
And I'm Samantha Carla.
And this is the Babylon News Network.
A mask for your brain, protecting it from the infection of bad ideas.
We now take you live to our continued coverage of the Senate confirmation hearings as Amy Coney Barrett arrives on scene.
Have a great confirmation, honey.
Hey, honey, bye-bye.
Love you.
Bye-bye.
Love you.
Frank read all those little intros where he's like a mask for your brain.
Give us an insight into how you can be so unequivocal in opposing some majority decisions, but can have an open mind when it comes to the future of the Affordable Care Act.
Senator, I am not hostile to the Affordable Care Act.
How can you make a decision on gun control if you own a gun?
Do you own a gun?
How many guns do you own?
Hi, honey.
Can you come at guns?
No, no one cares about your crossbow.
Don't include the crossbow.
He's going to include the crossbow.
Senator, are you eating a giant cockroach?
It feeds the evil growing inside me, and it's also for the protein.
But I'll ask the questions about here.
Oh, I'm just plain old Captain.
That seems like a different reaction.
It's not even from a church.
It's from CBS.
Okay.
Disappointed.
Will you all return Roofy Raid?
This is an important point for us.
Important because you care about women's rights?
Yeah.
That's why.
Now answer the question.
No, Ro is not a super president.
Lawless Franklin.
If you say anything other than Rovy Red is super cool.
I will not.
If you want my.
Don't be red.
The issue is about.
Would you like something for your tummy?
This is a disgrace to the Constitution.
Power of the Constitution compels you.
Power of the Constitution compels you.
Come into me.
Come into me.
Some very tough questions there.
Well, that's it for this week.
Remember, if anything bad happens to you, it's because you didn't listen to journalists.
Good night.
Hold on, kids.
I'm out of here.
Time for soccer practice.
I liked all the people that were really confused.
Oh, potato.
Here's potato.
There he is.
I like when the people who had never seen the exorcist were really confused by potato.
They were confused.
Oh, they never seen the exorcist movie.
They were confused to why she's like, come into me.
Come into me.
Like, what are you talking about?
And like, why she gets possessed at the end and all that?
Yeah.
So that was the voice there was Bridget Nelson, wife of Mike Nelson of Mystery Science Theater, Riff Tracks.
Yeah.
But yeah, that one we cranked out in a week, and that was insane.
Oh, I remember we're talking about so many things I would do different if I could, if I had more time on that.
That's great.
It's really hard for me to watch.
We're talking about the animation in the beginning when we're writing this, and we're like, maybe we just have the people like just kind of the crowd just kind of bounces around or whatever.
And we just focus on one senator and then you guys just went insane.
Well, what happened with that?
Because I outsourced the other senators bouncing and I just kind of provided them with artwork to kind of piece together puppets.
And I'm just like, all I want, I literally, I just don't have time to do this.
It just create like one of them kind of bouncing like this and one where they're bouncing more like this and one where they're more bouncing more like this as it intensifies.
And then, so the guy that I outsourced that to, he just went, oh, he spent way, way too much time on it.
It does look great.
It was way more than I wanted, but that has got the guys like jerking their heads around and freaking out and stuff like that.
And it's great, but it costed us too much money.
Yeah.
It does.
Well, this is coming out Friday.
What's the next video that we have coming?
What's our next one we're doing is Guy Curtis will infiltrate Antifa.
Oh, this is a funny one.
Yeah.
And it's another, it's our most, well, I guess that counts as a BNN episode, but yeah, it's one of our more ambitious ones.
He's going to go out on the street.
He's going to meet him and he's going to find out that, like, they kind of need a father figure.
It's touching.
It's very touching.
Sweet and touching.
See, we like to humanize our political opponents.
Yeah.
Like Antifa.
All right.
Well, if you want to check out animation that we're doing that Ethan's working so hard on, youtube.com/slash the babylon beat.
Maybe you're watching this on YouTube.
Maybe you're listening, but subscribe there.
And we're doing a video a week right now.
We may take some time off for the holidays.
And we're kind of doing a little bit of a reboot of the BNN eventually here.
Yeah, renaming it.
We're going to take, I think, after this next one, maybe.
I think we're going to take like a few weeks, maybe two weeks or something, a break on it to get ahead because we've been on this one week per cartoon thing, which is kind of an insane thing to jump into, especially not having experience really cranking out animation.
So yeah, we're going to get a little ahead of it, but we have some really ambitious ones planned out.
We got a lot of ideas.
I'm going to do more Better Cops episodes.
And we're going to kind of do a reform, new format for the new show, BNN.
We'll become the talk down with Guy Curtis.
We're working on that.
And then we have some other shorts with the family and some other stuff like that.
So excited to see where it goes.
It's awesome.
One of the things I love about the animation is that the obvious thing for us to do as the Babylon B was to watch the talking heads sitting at the desk, like me and you putting on suits and going, you know, out of a local church today, blah, blah, blah.
That was the obvious step.
So to be able to do something that really distinguishes the Babylon B, like doing a full animation channel.
Yeah, that's something I think.
It's quite unique for our kind of satire.
It breaks us from that accusation of just being a copy of the onion.
It helps us to become our own thing.
And I'm all about that.
Yeah.
So anyway, check it out.
Youtube.com/slash the Babylon B.
And yeah, it's very, very cool.
There's a whole playlist, animation playlist.
There's an animation playlist on there.
And I just want to say, comment.
Cry and share.
Let's do some hate mail.
I really miss Adam Ford.
Okay, so we wrote an article called 10 Ways to Put Christ Back in Christmas this year.
It was satirical as all the content on the Babylon V is.
And this person was not happy with it.
So Bob's Bob.
Bob says, your recent post titled 10 Ways to Put Christ Back in Christmas this year, which tells people to go out and slash tires, break into Costco, and other criminal activity, is actually shameful and borderline inciting violence.
I normally, really like your stuff.
That's a classic line.
And was considering donating monthly since the turn in the election.
But even behind the mask of parody, that post is terrible and gives the people you purport to be mocking the ammo to say, we are no better.
I normally really like your stuff.
We need like a something that sounds like so many hate mails.
I usually like it, but when you said that people should go slash tires because of Christmas or whatever, I don't remember this.
I don't even know what the breaking old one or new.
This is new.
Okay.
It was similar to your old infographic you did about winning the war on Christmas.
It was kind of that done as a list.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's stuff like someone says happy holidays, punch them.
You know, that kind of thing obviously over the tough.
And humorous.
Sorry.
Bob, we commit to doing better.
Bob was like, his hand was on his bill fold.
He was ready to go.
Getting out a hundred dollar bill.
Subscribe.
That's how much it costs.
I don't know.
Maybe annually.
And then his cursor goes up to the subscribe button.
Maybe I'll read one more article.
To stick the $100 bill in his CD tray, and he's like, and it pops up on his RSSV.
Unless they're having like a little ATM port on your computer.
That's one funny thing about that Kill Your Parents one we did.
Like, there's no visual representation.
I don't have her holding her phone up.
So she had a classic vinyl record.
Yeah, which is cool.
That's cool.
That's cool again.
It's hip.
It's hip again.
All right.
Freeloaders, we're kicking you off the helicopter, throwing you out like commies.
And the rest of us are going into the subscriber portion where we read some bonus hate mail.
Oh, yeah, we got a good one.
We answer a video mail question.
We read our subscribers' best submitted headlines and we tell cool stories.
Yeah.
Stories we can't tell to the general public because they're too risque.
Risque.
Risque.
They're definitely HBO level.
If you know what I mean.
Cinemax.
It's mostly just stories about Ethan's three-year-old pooping on things.
But here we go.
He doesn't want that.
He just undercut the whole subscriber.
Oh, I mean, it's really funny.
Risky.
Risque.
And thanks for listening and following and watching.
We like you.
Goodbye.
The rest of this podcast is in our super exclusive premium subscriber lounge.
If you're not a Babylon Bee subscriber, go to babylonbee.com/slash plans for full-length ad-free podcasts.
Access to our headline forum, 20% off the items in the Babylon Bee store, a gift, and more.
Please drop us a review on iTunes and share the podcast with a friend.
Feedback and love mail go to podcast at babylonbee.com.
Follow Ethan at AxeCop and Kyle at the underscore Kyle underscore man on Twitter.
Kyle and Ethan would like to thank Seth Dillon for paying the bills, Adam Ford for creating their job, the other writers for tirelessly pitching headlines, the subscribers, and you, the listener.
Until next time, this is Dave D'Andrea, the voice of the Babylon Bee, reminding you to go forth and punch Satan repeatedly in the ribs.
like their five-year-old and stuff It's like, you know, just, I don't know, as far as we could, we checked the lyrics out of this and like, this is like terrible.