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Sept. 28, 2024 - Adventures in HellwQrld

01:56:41

Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #208: Mark Robinson is awful and bad

I've lost the show notes and my brain is puddling but I do recall that Eric The Deep State Operative filled in for L and we talked about how Mark Robinson is a Nazi and that's really bad. Maybe vote against that guy. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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	I helped once.
	Once!
	And now I get questions about everything.
	Set up PCs, the screen doesn't work, the printer has stopped.
	I can't do my job!
	Have you also become the job's involuntary tech expert?
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	Have you thought of something for dinner?
	No, but maybe something that's a little healthy.
	Yes, we have some... Green grapes.
	In the fridge?
	Yes.
	Green grapes.
	That's a good start.
	What should we have in addition?
	Green grapes.
	What about salmon?
	Yes, salmon with aniseed.
	Green grapes.
	That's good.
	And healthy.
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	Thank you.
	The Adventures in Hell World podcast talks in-depth about QAnon.
	While it's meant to be comedic informative, sometimes we have to get into things like child abuse and violence against people.
	Listener discretion advised.
	Hello, everybody.
	I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
	Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
	This week I'm joined, as always, by Haley, a.k.a.
	Arizona Right Watch.
	Um, hello everybody.
	I'm proud to announce that I have won my bid on my InfoWars mic, and I am coming to you from Alex Jones' former mic.
	He sounds beautiful on Tyranny Crusher and also baby Tyranny Crusher.
	And this week we're also joined by Eric, the Deep State Operative.
	Hello everyone.
	Thanks for having me here.
	I'm reporting from an undisclosed location that is totally not a FEMA death camp.
	That is where we appreciate you being, not the FEMA death camp.
	I love it.
	I love the deep cuts.
	I love the understanding of Illuminati lore.
	It's so awesome.
	There's this, Kag Drogo is one of the big QAnon promoters, and he's also the saddest little fanboy.
	When Matrix and Authority and all those guys leaked a bunch of DM chats, Of the QAnon promoters they hate because those QAnon promoters like Michael Flynn and Authority and Matrix hate Michael Flynn.
	There was like a section of it where like Keg Drogo was like, Oh God, I'm so honored to be with you guys.
	You're so cool.
	And it was just like, Oh my God.
	I just, if anyone ever said that to me about anything, I'd be like, no, sorry.
	I'm, please.
	I'm not, I'm not cool.
	Like calm down, relax.
	I'm nothing.
	But, you know, Awakened Outlaw and Jordan Sather and all those guys were like, yeah, Keg, we're pretty great.
	We're pretty incredible.
	You should be honored to be a part of us.
	But, uh, our boy Kag loves talking about the FEMA death camps and how Trump prevented the FEMA death camps via the vaccine because the vaccine allowed us to stay open.
	And if we didn't have the vaccines, then they would have herded us into the FEMA death camps.
	I just mentioned them, like, in a room just, you know, chain-smoking and sweating like Jordan Peele trying to figure out, how do we explain the vaccines?
	How do we do this?
	Right.
	And the other side of it that I enjoy is just the idea of like George Soros and Taylor Swift and all these people like sitting around a long table and they're like, damn it!
	Trump got out the vaccines too fast!
	Now we can't herd them all into the FEMA death camps!
	Damn you, Trump!
	Now only tens of millions will die from our toxic shot instead of the hundreds of millions we would have murdered in our death camps.
	Damn you Trump!
	I mean that's like one of the funny things is people are always talking about like how voting is harm reduction and stuff like that so that's what instead of like arresting all the bad guys and saving the world Trump and Q were actually just doing harm reduction they were just like we were just like we we we saved as many as we could from the Illuminati but we couldn't save you all like tens of millions still have to die from the clutch shot but it's it's it's best we could do we're fighting a thousands year old death cult it's tough it takes a lot of work
	Speaking of that, hang on, I got my seasonal yearly COVID shot today.
	I'm a Soros sheep.
	I did my duty.
	Oh, fine.
	My wireless devices are perking up.
	It's always helpful to get the signal boost once a month.
	Your microphone sounds better this week.
	Yes.
	I don't have that going.
	Yes, the 5G coursing through my veins.
	What was really funny was they gave me a flu shot, a COVID shot.
	They were like, oh, you're also eligible for a Hep B shot.
	And I was like, man, pour it in.
	What do I know?
	What do I care?
	I'll take every vaccine you can offer me.
	I'm here for all of it.
	I mean...
	We're in year four of getting vaccines, and I have yet to die, which... I mean, I was told this was going to kill me immediately in 2020, and somehow, someway, the mass death I've been promised hasn't occurred.
	Yeah, at my casino, they offered every employee who got vaccinated like 50 or 100 bucks to do it.
	And basically everybody did.
	And weirdly enough, I haven't lost a coworker yet.
	It's so strange.
	I just...
	That's really good about your COVID shot update.
	Did you see that Kennedy was just at the Capitol with like Ron Johnson and there was a roundtable about all health and obviously it was very anti-COVID shot but there was a local influencer there that I find to be quite fascinating because she does episodes of her podcast like don't brush your teeth
	and here's why raw milk is good and like she's so hardcore about the raw milk thing that she just had an episode where she was like even putting it in your coffee is pasteurization and like um it's just absolutely like wild just like the the worms in her body must be coursing um and that's who was just uh at the capitol telling us not to get the clot shot um
	If you are not sucking from the udder directly, if you're not giving a female cow a blowjob, if you're not just working it, you're basically a thug who's drinking pasteurized milk.
	It's gotta be direct from the tit or it doesn't count, motherfucker.
	That's what I want from that woman.
	I remember seeing this guy who was saying that raw milk is okay as long as you boil it first.
	I'm like, oh, so raw milk is fine as long as you pasteurize it.
	Right, exactly.
	That was the thing.
	There's this woman on my Twitter feed and she is a very attractive young lady who went to Harvard and she posts all these photos of herself.
	Like, wearing her sexy outfits while being at Hartford, wearing her Hartford cheerleading outfit and all this stuff.
	And it just triggers all these men so much, because they just can't have a woman be both hot and intelligent at the same time.
	And the reason she got on my radar was because she was against raw milk, and oh man, did she get so much shit from so many people about raw milk.
	Yeah, I'll send you a link to her.
	But yeah, it was just the funniest thing.
	And she even said something.
	She's like, I've gained 10,000 followers since the raw milk debacle.
	I promise you, I mostly talk about coding and occasionally do cosplay.
	Raw milk is not my thing.
	You're not going to get much about this from me.
	And it was just people were like, the hot, intelligent lady is fighting for pasteurization.
	We support you.
	We will follow you.
	And it's just like, oh, my God.
	Yeah, they're really strict in the alt-health world, in the fashy food alt-health world.
	They're incredibly, like, just hostile about pasteurization.
	Which is such a funny thing.
	And also seed oils.
	I've noticed that they also are really like, no seed oils.
	I heard that they're getting on the anti-acidic acid or something.
	I saw someone say that they're apparently folic acid is making a comeback.
	It's a bad thing.
	Yeah.
	Cause I remember that a couple of years ago, that was the thing.
	It's like no folic acid, I guess.
	Yes, that's right.
	An essential nutrient that you need in your body.
	Let's get rid of it.
	Yeah, Brian Cates, who used to write for the Epoch Times, so he used to get paid by the Felon Gong, and now he's just a... Back then, he would say that QAnon was bullshit, and he didn't believe in it, and then, I guess when he got laid off by the Epoch Times, he decided to go full-pilled, and then he was just sort of like, now that I've read the beauty of the Q-Drops, my third eye is opened, and I understand the truth.
	Brian did a whole thing about how he doesn't take seed oils anymore.
	So now he doesn't get sunburn.
	He was like posting all these clips of him like being shirtless out in Arizona and being like, this doesn't hurt me because I don't take seed oils.
	And if you don't have seed oils in your system, you don't burn in the sun.
	And it was like, well, enjoy your melanoma in 10 years, buddy.
	I mean, just that's how this is going to go.
	I don't know.
	I don't know what to tell you.
	I mean, cause I, I'll just say that like, if you live in really hot areas, but you just like wear the right clothing, you usually don't burn that bad.
	I, I did a lot of walking when I worked in, when I worked and lived out in Nevada and I never burned and I burned like charcoal.
	I, if I'm in the sun for like more than a half hour, I just start to sizzle like a steak on the grill.
	I, I am incredibly fair-skinned.
	And as my two co-hosts here can testify, looking at me on the webcam, I am ghostly white.
	I am not pink.
	I am actually white.
	My flesh is the same tone as white-out ink.
	If you make a mistake on a piece of paper, my skin tone is what you see when you cross it out with the white-out.
	Pink is what Hitler was talking about.
	It's kind of weird because I'm usually the whitest person in the room.
	No, Haley's right.
	I'm Harrion.
	I have blonde hair and blue eyes.
	I am the Supreme Race with my, like, giant beer gut and inability to walk more than 20 feet without getting winded.
	Exactly.
	I am the Ubermensch.
	I am exactly, I am exactly the Fuhrer's perfected version of humanity who, at the end of this little speech I'm going to give, I'm going to hit mute on the mic and then pant heavily because I am now aggressively winded by having done all this talking.
	I'm literally Nordic.
	He wasn't even kidding.
	He was really doing it.
	But, you know, I'm Nordic, like, you know, I did a DNA profile and it just showed a map of Europe because I'm from everywhere, but like a quarter of it was Northern Europe.
	And I know my name, which I will not divulge is Norwegian.
	So, so I'm like, so like, like, like Wagner had me in mind when he was writing his stuff.
	Yeah, I've never done a DNA test, mostly because I know the Illuminati wants my DNA for their programs.
	I know that I'm an aggressive Euro-mutt.
	I mean, my grandfather was English-Norwegian, my grandmother was Irish-English, and like all that kind of stuff.
	It's just all the islands, all of Scandinavia, that is basically where I'm from.
	So it's just every fair-skinned person imaginable.
	The fact that I don't have red hair is kind of surprising.
	I mean, it's just like that kind of, that's, That's like where I came from is just all the pasty folk, all the pasty folk with terrible teeth.
	But thankfully I managed to avoid that.
	I got to American Dentistry and they gave me braces so my teeth are not horrifying.
	But I still have my wisdom teeth because I ripped out a bunch of other teeth from my braces before my wisdom teeth came in.
	So when I got my wisdom teeth, they didn't have to take them out.
	Trenchant podcast commentary.
	So many people were waking up this morning going, man, does my brains have his wisdom teeth?
	I need to know.
	I need to know.
	And I'm like, here I'm... That's right.
	Yeah, kind of a big ADA.
	Yes.
	Oh, God.
	So, enough of all this nonsense.
	Let's get to the amuse-bouche.
	It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
	Get ready for the amuse-bouche.
	Boom.
	Topic number one.
	Donald Trump has watches to sell you, the common man.
	The regular salt-of-the-earth American who needs a watch can now buy a Trump watch.
	I haven't seen this.
	I'm Googling it now.
	Google it now.
	Basket it.
	As I look at it, I've seen like 15 tweets about it just today.
	Yeah, let the Trump watch wash over you like a waterfall.
	And it's as ugly as you can probably imagine.
	Oh, it's the pure gold, gaudiest, most hideous thing.
	They ripped off the Rolex time face.
	I don't know if they can actually be sued for that, but I mean, it's blatantly the Rolex time face.
	You know what I'm trying to say.
	Yes.
	Clock face.
	Yeah, exactly.
	It looks like they have a rose gold color, which is nice.
	I'll follow it.
	If you have the rose gold iPhone, I'm sure.
	There's a lot of gold options.
	I do like the one, though, that has his signature on it because, I don't know.
	His signature just looks so, like, fake.
	It looks like done by a machine, which is probably how he signs all that shit so often, but his signature is interesting to me.
	There's literally just a bunch of up-and-down lines.
	It's just a series of unfinished isosceles triangles.
	Just pink, pink, pink, pink.
	There's no even, like, D and T at the start of it.
	It's all just, like, Donnie, sign this.
	And he just, like, scribbles.
	And then they're like, good job.
	This is, like, good job, Don.
	Which everybody likes, right?
	Oh, I can't wait till he uses a sharpie on this hurricane that we're about to get hit with in Florida and Georgia.
	Oh, I can't wait till he just moves that hurricane over a few feet with the power of his weather-altering sharpie.
	Oh, it's gonna be so great.
	Oh, the back has him doing the pumped fist.
	Oh, the double jerk?
	Yeah, the double jerk.
	No, no, after the assassination fist.
	Oh, the fight fist.
	Yeah, the fight, fight, fight.
	And, um, it looks bad.
	His face looks bad in that image.
	I, um, I posted this on Twitter, uh, last night, I think, or maybe a night before, but I watched a video on YouTube and then right after that video finished, I got hit with an ad of Trump begging me for money to help him win the election.
	And his fucking eye is like swollen shut.
	Like on the camera, to me, it looks like it's his left eye, but it's reversed.
	That's probably his right eye.
	But his eye looks like it's swollen shut.
	It looks like Melania like popped him for over the rumors about him and Loomer or something.
	And it's just, I just remember when our media spent months and months talking about how Joe Biden had one foot in the grave and was ready to pass on.
	And we as America couldn't have such a...
	Enfeebled man being our president.
	And meanwhile, at the end of this ad on YouTube where we're like 40 days out from the election, I'm getting like Donald Trump, one eye shut, comb over even smaller and weaker than ever, nearly bald, his hair falling out of his head.
	And he's just like, I need you to give me $20 so I can beat Kamala Harris and bring American greatness This is very important, biggest election ever, give me money!
	And it's like, oh my god, is he gonna die in the middle of this commercial?
	Would it even be ethical to film it if that was the case?
	And no one in our media is talking about it.
	No one is talking about the fact that this guy is literally just like just clinging to the desk trying to not fall over as he has one eye shut and he's slurring his way through this ad begging for money.
	And you can just, like, see Peter Thiel and J.D.
	Vance, like, measuring the drapes of the Oval Office that they're about to inhabit.
	Because, like, I said to someone, I'm like, if Trump wins this election, the over-under on him is breaking the record for Harrison's shortest presidency.
	I'm leaning under.
	I don't think he's going to make it a month.
	I mean, he just looks like shit.
	I mean, he's so...
	I mean, it's really amazing.
	People have done this, where you watch him debating Hillary in 2016, and he's still terrible, but he's lucid.
	And now it's eight years later, and the guy's gone.
	After that debate, you had Eric Erickson being like, you fucking idiots talked about eating pets and Trump got word of it, now he's running with it.
	And it's like, maybe not have a candidate who thinks eating pets is a real thing.
	How about that?
	How about your guy not just be a lunatic moron?
	We don't have Clay Higgins on the agenda, but- Oh, go, go.
	I mean, I don't know exactly, I don't remember everything that was said in that, but it was like the most racist thing ever and he's also leaning into the, you know, Haitians are eating animals and just calling them barbaric and saying that they will all be deported before J20.
	I got the tweet.
	Okay, yeah.
	L-O-L, these Haitians are wild, eating pets, voodoo, which he spelled V-U-D-U, not V-O-O-D-O-O, voodoo, nastiest country in the Western Hemisphere, cults, slapstick gangsters.
	What does that mean?
	Like, does he think that the Haitians are like the Joker, spraying people with their, like, flowers that have acid in them or something?
	Again, they give you the Joy Buzzer handshake that electrocutes you to death?
	What is he talking about?
	But damned if they don't feel sophisticated now, filing charges against our president and VP.
	They're filing a lawsuit against Biden and Harris?
	What are you talking about, Clay?
	They are our president and vice president right now.
	All these thugs better get their mind right and their ass out of our country before January 20th.
	So, anyone who talks to you about illegal immigrants and how they don't want them, no.
	They're talking about how they don't want non-whites in the country.
	And if you're not white, you're an illegal immigrant.
	That's what illegal immigrant means to these people.
	Yeah, it's like how DEI is a cover for the N-word.
	Yes.
	Yeah, this was just a long way of saying the N-word, I think.
	This was like a paragraph worth of that.
	There's a lot of that lately where it's just like, you know, kind of like how people are like, oh, did Trump ever say the N-word?
	And it's like, well, he said everything, even if he never did, he said everything that is basically the N-word.
	And his whole ideology and everything he did with Central Park Five is just a long way of saying it.
	So I don't really have a either or.
	I don't have an interest in whether he did or not because it's just like it's irrelevant.
	He's a racist piece of shit.
	He's anti-black.
	Oh, yeah.
	That was one of the things in the Charlie Kirk, like, lib versus conservative thing.
	Like, one person was like, when has Trump ever been racist?
	And the lib kid was like, here, here, here, and here.
	And then the person was just like, oh, no, he's not racist.
	Shut up, you lib!
	You're a tuck!
	And then ran away.
	I mean, so.
	But yeah, so it is so strange that again, we're like a month and a few days away from this election and these watches are not going to the Trump campaign or to MAGA pack or this money's just going right into his pocket.
	This is literally Donald Trump is like, give me Donald Trump money for me to have personally.
	I am not going to use this money to try to win the election.
	I just want some cash.
	Just give me some money, you fucking suckers.
	That's awesome.
	It's so nuts.
	If anyone but him did this, it would be the biggest scandal in America.
	But the standards this guy is held to are so low.
	It's just, oh yeah, Donald Trump's a crook.
	What do you want from us?
	You want us to report on his crookness?
	Why bother?
	Everyone knows that.
	It's just like, well, you know, maybe if you didn't kid glove this guy for the last nine years, maybe he wouldn't be within striking distance of the White House.
	How about that?
	How about that?
	Yeah.
	Um, I, it's kind of like how, uh, I think Amanda talks about this a lot, or the guest host that filled in for me last week, just how like people often turn down her articles and just the whole field of kind of right-wing extremism in general is kind of dwindling.
	Cause people kind of give you this response, like, yeah, we already know they suck.
	And it's like, okay, well it's kind of important to constantly be reporting on these things and why they suck.
	But sure.
	Yeah, it's like the Washington Post is like, democracy dies in darkness, and we're turning off the lights!
	It's like, thanks Washington Post, you're the greatest.
	How about you help us report on this shit a little?
	How about that?
	So anyway, uh, Adam's indictment, eh?
	Yay!
	I think the whole state of America maybe was cheering.
	I was gonna say just New York but I have a friend that's in New York right now and he was just there on happenstance when this happened and he said that like he could just hear like people partying outside his hotel.
	Mike's eating, so I'm just kind of filling in the air for a second.
	He went to the classic chili bar place.
	No, I was doing Alex Jones, where the other person talks and I just eat while they're talking.
	But unlike Alex, I was actually paying attention.
	I wasn't just like working on my hoagie so aggressively that When I saw that they stopped talking, I just like heated up from my hoagie for a moment, unmuted my mic, and said, yeah, it's great, continue.
	And then went back to the hoagie and just kept feasting.
	Yeah, so it appears that Eric Adams has been indicted.
	The full indictment probably isn't gonna get rolled out for the whole way, but the big moment that we have right now is that he defrauded New York for about $10 million.
	Doing some sort of scam where he was getting illegal campaign contributions from what appears to be Turkey, of all places.
	Apparently he is randomly being bought off by the Turks.
	And so again, comedic informative podcast, we may not have all of these, all this information, right.
	But the dude has been indicted.
	And that's the, that's the thing I'm seeing on the inner tubes at the moment is that this was a $10 million worth of swindling.
	that he did to defraud the people of New York on behalf of his foreign overlords, who appear to be the Turks.
	And there's a text message from one of his minions to him about where he was in Europe at the time.
	And he replied to them and said, Istanbul is always the first stop.
	So apparently he is just like, On this travel plan where he always hits up Turkey to start his daily travels through Europe because that's where he goes to his handlers to receive his paper bags full of money with which to then carry out grifts in America once he returns back to stateside.
	Yeah, I haven't read the indictment, but I've read tweets by people who have read the indictment and they're mentioning stuff.
	Like I, one guy said, I think, I think if you mentioned the page number was like 15 that, uh, this one guy was like, this one, this one guy works for, um, Adams was like, uh, it was like, I don't know if he'll be cool with this.
	Cause it's illegal, but I'll go talk to him.
	And then he goes over to Adams and says, no, I'm totally cool with that.
	So he's like, okay, so illegal is not a problem.
	Good to know.
	Oh, it turns out my boss is totally okay with crimes.
	My boss.
	My boss is like, am I getting paid for the crimes?
	Then yes, I will crime.
	That is not a problem.
	No problem with that.
	Yeah.
	I just want to add about the turkey thing that this is my small bit of proof that that is accurate that he was taking money from the Turkish government because I got a text chain
	uh meme after the indictment came down like literally like 10 minutes after it happened um and it's one of those like emoji heavy kind of nastily written uh text chains and i'm just gonna read it um because and it includes the turkish flag in it so oink oink pay pigs cuffing season came in early in new york titty Top cop Eric Adams has been indicted on federal criminal charges.
	Our corruption mayor has been taking big thick stacks of cash from foreign governments and then there's the Turkish, there's the Turkish flag right there.
	And crooked cunt tractors.
	Now he's been caught with his greased palms red-handed.
	What a nasty, greedy pig.
	And then it tells me to send this on.
	It's like one of these texts.
	So that's how I'm pretty sure it's true, the Turkish government thing.
	Absolutely, absolutely.
	When you can't trust a random text chain full of emojis and weird vernacular slurs, what can you trust?
	I mean, my God.
	You know when all the Federalist Papers were written?
	Yes, this was how Hamilton supported the National Bank.
	Oh, man.
	That's what it's all about.
	That's what it's all about.
	Absolutely.
	So again, Adam's just got indicted.
	The first bit of the unsealing has started and this pivots into the fact that In QAnon world, everything is interconnected in a spider web of crime and corruption, and Adams being indicted is just proof that this is fallout from the Diddy scandal, and that Adams is not being indicted for being on the Turkish payroll or any of that.
	He's being indicted because he's on the Freak Out videos.
	He's part of Diddy's sex orgy, child trafficking crimes, and That's really why Adams went down, and we're going to get Obama and Michelle Obama very soon.
	I just saw a post where someone said that the Diddy videos are going to confirm that Michelle Obama has a penis.
	Man, do these people want Michelle Obama to have a dick.
	Like, I mean, like a small child wants an Elmo at Christmas.
	QAnon yearns only for Michelle Obama to have a penis.
	Oh, man.
	So much to say.
	What'd you say?
	Pride would have so much to say.
	Yes, but just a little.
	A touch.
	A skosh.
	I actually, the video that I saw, I saw the tweet and the video because I've been watching my knowledge fight and I found out that in a moment of unbelievably rank hypocrisy, Alex Jones loves AI.
	song generators, which you would think would be proof to him of the Mark of the Beast and the devil taking over and stifling all our creativity.
	But no, it turns out that, uh, Alex loves having his minions just crank out AI songs, making fun of his enemies.
	And, uh, this video, uh, it was your, it was the video of all this stuff.
	It's, it's, uh, Michelle Obama dancing on the Ellen show and then her clothing bulges in the wrong places.
	Proving she has a PP and all that good stuff.
	And it was playing this like horrible AI song about Michelle Obama's penis.
	And I, and it, knowing that it was an AI song, I was just like, uh, like boo, boo.
	Like if you're going to be dumb and uncreative, at least do it, do it yourself.
	Don't like fob off your uncreativity to machines.
	Come on, come on, Alex.
	You're, you're not better than that, but I wish you were.
	Um, I've, I've seen a couple of different, uh, hot takes on the, on the whole thing from the, from the Republican side, the Democrats are going to be pretty universally like if he's guilty, screw it, get rid of him.
	But, uh, the two things I've seen is people who think he's innocent are saying it's because he's, uh, it's because he, uh, opposed the Biden, uh, border, the Biden-Harris border thing.
	And even Fox News was pushing that until they read the indictment and saw, no, this started months before that.
	But then the other thing I'm seeing from people who admit he's guilty is, oh, they're only doing it because he's black.
	Oh yeah, yeah.
	It's the whole thing where, like, DeLuminati's going after him because he won't bow to Biden-Harris, and because, like, the last thing they will accept is Blacks dissenting against Biden and Harris.
	They have to, like, cut them down.
	Because this is, like, the Republican racism about Blacks voting Democratic, and, like, all that kind of stuff.
	Like, hey, leave the Democrat plantation, blah, blah, blah.
	That is one of the most racist things in Republicanism, is this idea that Black people are being tricked to vote for Democrats, and that this is a twofer because you get to state that Democrats are actually the racist ones, and then you don't say the second part out loud, but it's a wink and a nod so all your friends know it,
	So the Democrats are the real racists, but they're able to trick the Blacks into voting for them.
	What does that make the Black people?
	Oh, that's right.
	It makes them very stupid.
	Ha ha!
	And you don't actually post that second part, but you just say, oh, the Blacks are being tricked into voting for the Democrats, and then everybody else just sort of gives each other an elbow on the ribs and all knowingly nod and smile.
	Yeah, you got a point there, buddy.
	They tricked them.
	And my answer to that is, so you guys admit that the South was the way it was before the Civil Rights Act got passed.
	How did the Republicans trick the non-racist whites into voting for them?
	How did that happen?
	Because I thought the white Southerners were the racist Democrats up until the moment they became the non-racist Republican voters.
	How'd they lose their racism?
	How did that happen?
	How did that white racism that made them Democrats evaporate into the either when they became Republicans?
	And their answer to that is to say, there was no party switch!
	Shut up!
	And they block you.
	Because you can go to hell.
	You can go to hell with that shit.
	Yeah, so Adams, yeah, Adams indicted.
	I'm seeing people like the Hodge twins, actually St.
	Clair, a bunch of right wing grifters are kind of saying, yo, you know, Eric, join the Republican Party.
	Come on over.
	We'll, we'll defend you.
	It's okay.
	We, we like criminals in the Republican Party.
	It's for criminals.
	Yes, we We enjoy our political leaders to have low ethics because we just claim you all have low ethics.
	That's what always blows my mind about these QAnon people.
	They're like, we're fighting corruption and one day you'll see that we were right and you'll agree with us.
	And I'm just like, Yeah.
	then indict obama for his crimes and let me see the evidence and then i'll believe you yeah and then they're like shut up and i'm like no like like that's the thing is everyone's like oh you democrats will defend anyone and i'm like no no we won't democrats are so happy adams got indicted people are like fuck that guy get rid of him piece of shit resign now i mean if if anything came out against biden that was actually bad i'd be like yeah fuck you biden right Resign.
	I don't give a shit.
	I'm not beholden to any political leader.
	I just, they are a means to an end for me.
	That's all they are.
	Like, yeah.
	It's like you said, if it goes back before you got Menendez, it's the same thing.
	It's like, if he's guilty, then bye-bye.
	And then, uh, uh, Al Franken, you know, he got me too'd and nobody tried to defend him, really.
	Yeah.
	Oh, my mom loves Al Franken every now and then.
	She'll just be like, man, he's so smart.
	I'm like, yeah, mom, but he was also like photographed like waddling a lady's tits and stuff.
	You can't do that.
	She's like, I know.
	But just, yeah, like, that's the thing is that Democrats actually have the standards and Republicans don't and they love to lie about that.
	I mean, this is a party that... RFK Jr.
	is a monster.
	Literally a monster.
	And then this gravel-voiced monster was like, I support Donald Trump.
	And everyone was like, yay!
	RFK Jr., the greatest!
	And it's just like, what the fuck?
	Why?
	How?
	How is this man on your side?
	He's terrible.
	The only thing that you agree with him on is vaccines.
	And that's just good enough for them.
	They're like, if you're a crank that believes in vaccines being murderous, then join the team.
	We don't care.
	We don't care that you'll fuck any woman that walks into your field division or don't take a.
	Go ahead.
	I was just gonna say, I think, like, just the Wendy Rogers phenomenon, how we constantly talk about her week on end, and she never gets disavowed by anybody in the ACGOP is just like... Yeah.
	Freaking off.
	Yeah, they just don't care.
	Wendy...
	Wendy Rodgers could do anything and no one will disavow her crimes.
	I haven't heard any Republicans, I forgot to bring this up in the show notes, but no Republicans have talked about Mike Lindell's 1488 pillow ad.
	And boy howdy, is that an unbelievably toxic thing to do.
	And yeah, Mike Lindell can still just give piles of money to everybody and they'll take it.
	I hadn't heard of that, so I went to look it up, and I swear, in Google, I typed in 1488 in an auto-filled pillow.
	Yeah, it was big news.
	So this is a known thing, apparently.
	It was like, he put it on Twitter, it was just a big ad that was like, on sale, you know, ad 1488, and for the listeners who don't know, this is a very explicit white supremacist neo-Nazi dog whistle.
	The 14 words are the David Lane, who is a neo-Nazi terrorist, uh though we must secure the existence for white children and the white race and then 88 is shorthand kind of neo-nazi skinhead culture of for hail hitler much like uh q is the 17th letter of the alphabet eight is the h is the eighth letter of the alphabet so hh is shorthand for heil hitler and then 88 is just your alphabetic code of that
	To make it all tricky.
	And Hayley also got the 14 words wrong.
	But you know how I know that?
	Because I always get them wrong too.
	I can never say them right whenever... If someone walked up to me and said, Mike Rains, here's a million dollars.
	Say the 14 words.
	I would just have pushed a million dollars back to them.
	And be like, nope, I can't do it.
	I've looked it up a hundred times.
	And even though it is literally only 14 words, I can never put them in the right order.
	I would like to say it's a good thing that you don't have 14 words memorized.
	I mean, in this field of research, you would think I would be able to know it, but nope.
	Cannot do it.
	I'm just like, something something white people, something something white kids.
	The end.
	I honestly, I can say it right now, but I'm not gonna.
	Because... It didn't take a lot of context to make you look like a Nazi.
	Yeah, it's good to just not say it correctly.
	It's good.
	It's just, it's, it's, it's, it's good.
	But it's, that's the basic gist.
	It's just a white supremacist slogan about we gotta keep on going white people and keep on fucking and making white kids and securing that existence.
	That's... Yes.
	It's like the Great Replacement version 1.0.
	1.0.
	Yeah.
	I, I, I don't want, so, yeah, uh, so, we're, we're, we're going to create the, I don't know, it's going to be the seven or eight words, which is keep, keep fucking white people, the six words.
	The six words!
	That's going to be our testament to the hard right white nationalism.
	Like, this phrase we've created ironically will now be taken unironically and used by neo-Nazis everywhere.
	And we're like, no!
	No!
	We didn't!
	No!
	This is not what we were going for!
	We weren't mocking you!
	And they're like, no!
	We're gonna keep fucking!
	The Hell and World podcast told us to!
	No!
	Everything's wrong!
	We hate the world!
	This sucks!
	That's the six words.
	Keep on trucking, but keep on fucking, and then really skinny white people underneath the porn.
	Yeah.
	A million years ago, back before he tried to have quote-unquote mainstream credibility, Jack Posabeck posted a trillion 1488 tweets out there.
	Back when Posabeck was just doing the Notice Me Senpai bullshit and would do anything for attention, even negative attention, he was just like, every line, every tweet I use has 1488 in it.
	Oh, that reminds me!
	Memory unlocked!
	You know who else used 1488 in a tweet?
	Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
	Yeah, Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
	posted a thing where he was like, it's been, like, 14 days ago, I requested Secret Service protection.
	It has been 88 days since I started my campaign, and yet I've received no information about this.
	And then people looked it up, and they were like, no, RFK's campaign started, like, 100 days ago, and they would not have given him an answer within 14 days.
	Those numbers were used for a reason.
	They were not just the actual benchmarks.
	And it's like, and then people were like, you really think RFK said that?
	I'm like, his fucking intern who posted his tweet did, and the intern knew what they were fucking doing, and RFK Jr.
	didn't disavow it, so no, get fucked, it was a neo-Nazi dog whistle.
	That's the thing with, like, Paul Gosar is a lot of people didn't believe, you know, basically, that he was aware that he was posting, like, constant Groyper memes and references and commentary.
	It's like, yeah, no shit, it's the 17-year-old, 18-year-old Groyper, Wade Searly, who, um,
	was the one doing that and that's why it was like so deep lore uh references on his fucking twitter account like it's not like it's i don't know i you know it's like i doubt mike pillow is handling his um twitter account like for the professional my pillow promotions but like someone uh definitely knew to make that little dog whistle on the The slash price thing last week.
	Anyways, comedy podcast.
	Mike's texting.
	Should I just talk about Arizona?
	No, no.
	I was looking at the breaking news, breaking news.
	We don't have it.
	Yeah, that was awesome.
	We had a, we had a dinosaur roar in the background to be our, that's our breaking news bump is, uh, The Howl of a Dinosaur Child.
	That is the indicator that we have shocking, breaking news on the pod.
	This one is a twofer.
	Yes.
	Newsmax has settled with Smartmatic for their election fraud.
	Terms of the settlement have not been disclosed yet.
	So Newsmax has gotten their asses paddled by Smartmatic.
	I don't know if they've already settled with Dominion yet or not, but basically Smartmatic and Dominion just went around just smashing all these right-wing shitbag companies with baseball bats.
	Basically, all these right-wing shitbag companies were just cash piñatas, and Dominion and Smartmatic just ran over them with bats and making the money fall out.
	That'd be less than Fox settled for, because I don't think there's any way in hell that those guys have half a billion dollars to pay out.
	Yeah, the only way Newsmax has 800 million dollars to pay out to Smartmatic, if Smartmatic now owns Newsmax, just...
	You turn on Newsmax and it's like, welcome to the Smartmatic News Stand Hall.
	I'm your host, a guy that used to do like sales for voting machines with local districts.
	Now I'm reading the news.
	I don't know how this really works.
	Let's go to Bob for the weather.
	And Bob's like, I just fixed the voting machines.
	I don't know what the weather is.
	It's going to rain tomorrow or something.
	Back to you.
	Yeah.
	Just a bunch of confused, smartmatic staffers at a Newsmax news set.
	Which would be a step up from the normal Newsmax reporting.
	Yes, yes, because at least it wouldn't be lying the whole time.
	Oh man, yeah.
	Yeah, it's a bad moment in history to be a right-wing disinformation peddler because apparently on November 13th is when Alex Jones's liquidation sale begins.
	So if you wish to be the proud owner of Infowars.com, November 13th is when apparently you can start bidding on that.
	Hey, let's start up a GoFundMe.
	Let's do this.
	Yes, yes.
	I mean, very obviously, the families of Sandy Hook and all those kind of people kind of have dibs on being the people that will actually own InfoWars.com.
	I'm just glad this is happening because those people deserve to get money from that d-bag.
	Yes, yeah.
	That's the thing, is that, like, in a weird way, it's like the weirdest charitable thing in the world.
	Like, if a bunch of rich people just paid 50 million dollars to buy the rights to InfoWars, that's literally just 50 million dollars you're just cutting a check to the Sandy Hook families for, like, the infinite money that Alex Jones will never give them.
	But It's nice that Alex Jones just owes infinite money to those people for the rest of his life and the wolf will always be at his door asking for more money for the Sandy Hook families because he'll never be able to come up with one and a half billion dollars.
	That actually reminds me, did you hear the latest thing about Giuliani?
	Oh, yeah, truly.
	I think I just barred.
	Yeah.
	Yes, man.
	Again, like just the the find out stage of the fuck around is upon us for so many people.
	And it's true.
	It's truly awesome.
	It's truly awesome.
	How so many people are just like paying for their crimes at this point.
	Uh, so, uh, the final thing I'll bring up before we get to, uh, the Arizona is, uh, I wanted to talk about this and because I am the guy that runs this podcast right now, cause L's away, the cat will play.
	Um, wanted to talk about the internal polls, which is like the new QAnon conspiracy theory about this election that, um, Basically, the polling that we're seeing, where nationally Harris is ahead, a new poll just came out from Emerson, which is usually a right-wing poll, and they just came out with a poll that Harris is up seven nationally, which immediately made a lot of right-wingers very angry.
	And then I saw another poll from another company today, where literally every battleground state is dead-tied, and Trump is up one in Georgia.
	And it's like, how is that even possible?
	Like, how could you pull, like, seven states and get six ties and one Trump up one?
	Like, I don't believe you.
	It just feels like they're so scared.
	They don't want to admit what's happening in the election.
	So they're like, eh, either one of them could win.
	I don't know.
	Beats me.
	It's like, well, then you're not a polling company.
	Flip a coin.
	Call something.
	Give me a prediction.
	But While this is all happening in the public world, there is this mentality inside QAnon that there are secret polls, the internal polls inside the Trump campaign and the Harris campaign.
	And these polls are the real polls.
	And the real polls show that Trump is winning in a landslide.
	And so literally whenever Kamala does anything on TV, I see so many posts.
	From QAnon promoters and QAnon adjacent people who are like, she's only doing this because her internals are terrible and she's desperate.
	And a lot of people, when I post these memes or I post these tweets, people are like, aren't internal polls just the same as public polls?
	Like how are their numbers different?
	And the answer is because they're magic.
	They're just magical polls that tell the truth.
	And you can't see those polls.
	So when Harris wins on election night, you'll know it was rigged because everyone knows the real polls, the polls you couldn't see, said she was going to lose.
	And then they cheated and stole it from her.
	And so... These are the exact same people who, uh, eight years ago were, were like prating in the streets saying every poll was wrong.
	Every single poll was wrong.
	We know the truth.
	Yeah, and four years ago, and I think a lot of the sort of existential dread about this campaign, beyond the fact that like Trump is a nightmare and if he wins he'll do incalculable damage to America, I think the other bit of existential dread we have about this race is that this is the first campaign ever Where Trump's been actually like in the ballpark, where he was leading Biden most of the way before Biden dropped out.
	And then after Harris got in, she's been up like three or four points.
	But when these battleground polls come up, like Trump's up one in Georgia, Trump's up one in Arizona.
	Kamala's only up three in Pennsylvania.
	And then everyone's like, well, Trump's overperformed the polls the last two times.
	So it's going to happen again.
	There's going to be another polling error in Trump's favor.
	So he's just going to win.
	And like, there's no reason to believe that to be the case because every election is different.
	And what we've actually seen, especially post-Dobbs, is Democrats have actually been the ones that have been under-polled.
	Ever since Roe got struck down, Democrats have been performing two or three points higher than the polls indicate.
	But just this idea that we've, in 2016 Hillary was winning the whole way, in 2020 Biden was winning the whole way.
	And so now that you have an election where Trump is leading in some spots, not nationally, but he's leading in some battleground states according to some polls, it's freaking people out.
	And people just can't take it because they're just like, oh no, he always losing.
	No, he can't be.
	And I think that's really driving a lot of people nuts.
	And then on the other side, you have the QAnon people be like, Trump up one, Meiji's up eight.
	I mean, it's so, oh, you got this in the, if they're even admitting he's winning, he's winning.
	We got this, bro.
	We so got this.
	And the last thing I'll say here is like in 2020, when Biden was up a million, at some point, I'd say like two or three months before the election, QAnon decided to just break reality.
	And they were just like, Trump's going to win all 50 states.
	Like, That was literally their battle cry, was all 50.
	I'll have to find the actual date of the tweet, but it was probably like a couple weeks before the election.
	Julian's Rum, big time QAnon promoter, just tweeted out, fuck it, all 50.
	He was just like, you know what?
	Trump's just running the table.
	And this was in the face of Biden being up like 10 going into the election night.
	And they were just like, no fucking denying reality.
	And then Trump lost by like four and a half points or five points.
	And they were just like, see?
	Polls were wrong.
	Your guy still got dog walked.
	You know what?
	Polls were wrong.
	Yeah, they cheated.
	Don't care.
	It was like, okay, great.
	If it was fair, he would have been in California.
	It's like, okay, sure thing, little guy.
	I mean, they're talking about him winning New York this time, which, I mean, if he wins New York, then his God is God.
	I don't know what to tell you.
	I mean, like, I'm not going around saying, you know what we're gonna get?
	Is he on election night?
	Blue Oklahoma.
	Fucking calling it right now.
	Fucking happening.
	You have no idea how powerful Harris's ground game is in Oklahoma.
	She's fucking carrying that state like you read about.
	I was going to do something like that as a joke, where you get those electoral maps that you can customize yourself.
	I was going to make one where every state is blue except for some random one like Montana.
	This is my pick.
	I will die on this hill.
	Someone, one of the kind of serious Twitter political feeds posted a map and they were like, you people are way discounting this map.
	And it was Trump 272, Harris 268, and the tipping state was Rhode Island going red.
	It's so small.
	People couldn't even figure out what the joke was until they finally figured out it was Rhode Island that carried Trump over the top.
	Back into the presidency.
	And then there were people who figured out what the map said, but didn't get it.
	It was a joke.
	What the fuck are you talking about?
	How does Trump want to win Rhode Island?
	There does remind me of one guy who dead serious made an electoral map that had California red and Texas blue.
	And he was serious about it.
	That's good.
	That's good.
	I like it when you commit to the bit.
	Just lose your fucking mind.
	Fuck reality.
	I mean, that's what this election is going to be.
	It's going to be like fucking Trump carries New York and then Kamala counters by winning Texas.
	It's like, oh no!
	The devastating punch and counter punch of massive electoral states flipping sides.
	I actually had like an argument with some Republican about the Electoral College and how dumb it was.
	And they were trying to argue that it wasn't dumb.
	And I said to them, if Texas ever flips blue, then you literally can never win another election and it's over.
	And then what are you going to think about the Electoral College?
	And then I was like, well, I hope that doesn't happen and blah, blah, blah.
	And I'm like, no, it'd be super dumb.
	Like if, if Texas ever became a solidly blue state, Republicans could win the popular vote, like seven elections in a row and they still would never win the Electoral College.
	Because if, if Democrats started with California, New York, and Texas as a headstart, the race is over before it even starts.
	It's done.
	It's done.
	So it's like.
	Ugh, God.
	We've talked way too long about way too much.
	Hayley!
	Talk about Arizona!
	Hayley!
	Read this, toots!
	I'm handing Hayley her thing to read.
	There you go.
	There you go.
	Read the thing.
	I was gonna talk about way more, but, you know, I mean, it's already gone for a fucking hour, so, um... I mean, there's a lot of miserable shit going on in Arizona that nobody cares about anyway, so...
	I'll talk about two stories that have somewhat merged and I am going to be the first one to report, Hellworld will be the first one to report, that there has been a third assassination attempt.
	Kidding.
	You mean fourth assassination attempt?
	Because we had the not a bomb in New York last week, which was our third assassination attempt.
	Yes.
	So now, Arizona is now our fourth attempt on Trump's life.
	Okay.
	I thought you and me both jumped on that.
	Wait a second.
	Don't forget about the real third one.
	So anyway, there was a, okay, these are going to be two stories that merge.
	Trump came to town.
	I wasn't here last week so it was technically like two weeks ago at this point.
	He went to Tucson.
	People passed out as usual.
	We all know this thing.
	There was a sign put up in Tucson that said, And then No Más Naranja, which is, basically is like, fuck you MAGA, no more orange.
	There was a politician down there who shared
	this image and um a bunch of magas showed up to like her board meeting and were very disgruntled that she uh did a hate crime against them by posting that so anyway moving on for now there was also at the trump rally a bunch of people sitting behind him there was it wasn't that many people sitting behind him because it was a very small venue
	Um...
	But after the rally, a woman had to be taken to the hospital because she was experiencing temporary blindness and she was sitting behind Trump and she, uh, and then after her like story made the news and like, you could tell her eyes are damaged.
	Like there was like, it's not like she was making shit up.
	Um, and there were other reports of people who got injured.
	sitting behind Trump.
	Basically eye and skin burns.
	Now this has gone and turned into a huge conspiracy that Trump was the target of a chemical attack.
	This kind of happened during the Cyber Ninjas audit.
	There was Joven Hutton Pulitzer, the fake treasure hunter who Got hired to work this thing.
	Um, got sick with COVID.
	Um, I'm almost certain it was COVID and instead created a conspiracy that, uh, the event he was at was targeted with like poisonous gas and he's survived.
	Um, kind of similar to that is what these people are saying is that basically Trump was targeted with some kind of Fuckin' fart gas that missed him and he magically survived because Angel Flag is on his side and the people behind him got hit.
	And what actually seems to have probably happened is that the lighting system was incorrectly rigged.
	This has actually happened at a Bitcoin conference before is that people on stage were face severe eye and skin burns because the lighting was like UV lighting.
	instead of the proper lighting and that's what seems to have happened but if you listen to Alex Jones he did a whole fucking like emergency broadcast um that uh breaking there is mounting evidence that Trump was the target of a chemical attack in Tucson Arizona last week um Lauren Witsky said uh So the numbers keep going up.
	I think about, like, six people were injured, but they're going with, like, 20-40.
	So Lauren Witzke says, it's yet again looking like there was an attempt on Trump's life again.
	Around 20 people at Trump's Tucson rally suddenly fell ill, reporting blurry vision and swelling.
	One person even diagnosed with a chemical burn.
	All of them seated.
	Where Trump entered the stage.
	You know, Drew Hernandez also calling it a chemical attack.
	Just lots of these shitbag fucking lying losers calling it a chemical attack.
	One of the men injured, one of the other people that was injured actually was replying to people online and he was, he says that Actually, it was his wife that was injured.
	He says, My wife, Martha, was one of them.
	It was due to excessive UVA exposure from intense stage lighting.
	It's called photokeratitis or flash burn.
	This is consistent with my wife's exposed skin that was sunburned and is currently peeling.
	People with glasses were not affected as lenses block most of the UV.
	Uh, it was incredibly painful.
	Okay, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
	You get the point.
	And, like, he, like, keeps going on with... There's other magas basically calling him, like, a liar.
	Uh, they're like, no, you were microwaved in a chemical attack.
	And he's like, no, actually we went to the doctor and she has a police, a doctor report and you know, all that.
	Um, and like, this was covered by mainstream news, like the burns and everything, but some people are also claiming it was the woman who posts the fuck you orange sign that like she was responsible for the chemical attack on Trump's life.
	Which is just a very funny thing to like tie her into.
	It's just like she posted a photo of a sign that she didn't even put up and it's literally just like a tiny little sign and it's just like that's the woman who did it.
	She tried to take out Trump.
	So that's what's going on in Arizona world.
	Everything is normal.
	I remember a long while ago when Ruth Bader Ginsburg was alive QAnon had spent years saying that she was already dead.
	And a QAnon promoter went to a funeral.
	I believe it was a funeral.
	And Ginsberg attended the funeral.
	And this QAnon believer took photos of Ginsberg and was posting it and saying, like, look, guys, I went to this funeral.
	She was there, blah, blah, blah.
	And the QAnon believers were like, no, you're lying.
	This is a deep fake.
	She wasn't there.
	There's something wrong with the kernings on these photos.
	And the woman was like, no, I saw her.
	And it was just like, man, it's gonna suck when your cult refuses to accept the evidence that you saw with your own eyes and the photos you took.
	And now you have to like, danger to them and try to like tell them no guys like honestly i'm still on your team i still believe in your insanity even though you reject the literal evidence i presented to you of a thing that you don't want to accept and it was like oh my god just what are we even doing here this is the absolute worst people what one thing i wanted to say um when hayley
	when you're talking about like that is that how can these assassination attempts all these guys seem to be okay with the idea that that god is protecting only trump and letting everyone around him get hurt - I, I agree.
	It's like, what is he, like a messiah?
	I mean, that is what they think, that he's a messiah figure, but it's like, man, God really fucking hates a lot of other people, huh?
	Yeah, that's what I always say to these people.
	I just say to them, man, so God was watching Oswald line up JFK and was like, fucking drop him.
	Kill that Catholic piece of shit.
	I don't give a shit.
	Fuck him.
	And the same thing with Bobby Kennedy, the same thing with Martin Luther King, the same thing with countless other people that got assassinated.
	But like Crooks is lining up Trump and then suddenly God just like gets off his throne.
	Oh shit!
	Ah!
	Pushes the gun so Crooks misses.
	God's just sitting there, whoo!
	Oh, that was close!
	That's my boy!
	That's my boy down there!
	Gotta protect old Donnie Two-Scoops!
	Can't let him get dropped, and Jesus is just looking at him going, Dad!
	Why did you not let that happen with Kennedy?
	He's like, ah, fuck that guy!
	I never liked Kennedy anyways.
	Just...
	The winners and losers that God picks is very strange.
	It's very strange that God's hedge of protection, as Christians like to talk about it, is very fickle.
	It's very fickle in nature.
	Enough about all this.
	this let's get into the news from the digital headlines to the digital front lines it's cues in the news what Wow, that bump was loud.
	I don't know what was going on there, but man, it hit my ears like harder than usual.
	I guess my headset just like stimpled to my skull this week.
	So just hearing, hearing for... We're not great sound quality.
	Yeah.
	Well, Jesus.
	Yeah.
	I hope, I hope my, what's going to be so awesome is I sound tested this before the pod.
	I did all this stuff to try to make sure that I sound okay.
	The moment I upload this and like download, the moment I get the clip and then play it back, I'm just going to sound like a peanuts parent.
	I'm just, it's going to be like, the music's going to end, the content warning is going to end.
	And then it's just going to be.
	Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
	The podcast will be unlistenable because it'll just be my gibbering, drooling mush mouth like most of the time I'm talking.
	Even though, again, I did everything I could to make sure the quality control on the... I actually had someone tweet at me, hey, can we pay for a new microphone?
	Like, you suck.
	And I was like, fuck, man.
	God damn it.
	Shit.
	Like, man.
	But yeah, so I repositioned my mic.
	I bought a new power cord.
	I did all these things.
	So I pray that I don't sound like dog shit this week.
	And Hayley and Eric have both said, no, you sound fine.
	So I just can't wait for Riverside or whatever to just mutilate me in post-production and continue this sparkling run of just absolute dog shit audio, which is the news.
	This is the news.
	And now we're going to the mailbag.
	Yeah, the news is Mike complaining about his microphone for five minutes.
	And then that's it.
	Nothing else happened this week.
	Oh wait, I'm getting an update.
	That's not true.
	What really happened this week is that Mark Robinson is a Nazi.
	That is your headline for the week.
	The state of North Carolina, which is deep red, oh wait, no, it's a battleground state that Harris is winning in the recent polls, and is also not important at all to the election, oh wait, no, Trump's entire campaign to try to get to 270 requires him winning North Carolina, so all those little things add up to the fact that, weirdly enough,
	The primary voters and the Republican Party of North Carolina have nominated an actual nut Nazi to be your next governor of the great state of North Carolina.
	Just absolute madness.
	And the best part about this oppo dump was, according to the sources I was reading online, this was not done by Democrats.
	This was done by Republicans in a desperate attempt to get Robinson to drop out of the election.
	so he could be replaced, because it came out the last day that he could drop out legally.
	And Robinson's response was, fuck you, I'm staying in the race.
	He was on some forum called Nude Africa, and he posted both Haley and Eric nodding vigorously, like I'm some small child dangerously teetering around as I'm walking around a room, like I'm some small child dangerously teetering around as I'm walking around a room, and they're just very happy that I walked away from this sharp table corner that I could have bumped my head on, and I just walked I'm like, yes!
	He's doing it!
	He's walking in the safe spot!
	Good job, little boy!
	It's so hard you can tell we both know this story very well.
	Yes, so on Nude Africa he posted some stuff about how he wished the KKK would accept black people because he would have joined them.
	He had a very weird name for Martin Luther King.
	I think it was like Martin Luciferian Coon or something to that effect.
	Yeah, it was not great.
	Oh, I don't think it exists.
	Nazi stuff and the racist stuff.
	He was very into role-playing piss play and about having affairs or threesomes with his wife's sister.
	I don't think it exists.
	I think she's a fantasy.
	She might be.
	I don't know if that has a sister.
	I don't think she has a sister.
	A lot of this, a lot of the writings was like, like he was writing fan fiction, it seems, because I don't think she has a sister, which makes it, I don't know how I would feel about that.
	It's like, hmm, he's fantasizing about having a threesome and affair with my sister, but she doesn't exist, so I don't know how I feel about this.
	He, um, had a tiny toy collection of little Nazi soldiers, um, which that was how the username was kind of came from.
	His username was Minisoldier on all these accounts, um, and his old, like, blog where he blogged little scene reenactments with his little mini soldiers was revealed.
	And someone found his old tweets and stuff where he talked about how I don't give a fat frog's butt about things, and people found that this guy posting on Nude Africa also used fat frog's butt a lot, which is such a weird idiom.
	It is very obviously him.
	It's like a form guy using that weird word that only he fucking uses.
	Yeah, underdogism.
	Yeah!
	Under dogma.
	Yeah, under dogma.
	Oh god.
	Up to the 24th episode on Sunday.
	Yeah, our episode coming out on Sunday which may become a weekly occurrence because apparently the new norm is going to become big content in the right wing very soon.
	Oh man.
	It is going to be terrifying that me and Hayley are going to be on the bleeding edge of new norm commentary.
	Which...
	That's just one of the moments where I finish that sentence and then I just stare into the middle distance and wonder how I fucked up my life this badly.
	This is where I am.
	Just sitting here thinking about, man, can't wait for the new episode of The New Norm to come out so I can pick it apart.
	Just the boyhood dream realized.
	What are you going to do when you grow up, Mike?
	I'm going to look at right-wing disinformation and melt my brain.
	Sounds great, little boy.
	You go do that.
	Parent develops crippling heroin addiction, wonders how they fucked up and raised such a weird kid.
	Just awesome.
	Just awesome.
	Go ahead, Hayley.
	I just have to talk real- because I'll forget it.
	With the Mark Robinson thing, you know, nobody's really sticking by his side.
	Even Trump, like, came to North Carolina the, like, next day and didn't give him a shout out, even though he previously called him, like, Martin Luther King, too.
	Martin Luther King on steroids, he called it.
	And Robinson's entire staff is left.
	I think he's got literally a staff of two at the moment.
	And the Republican National Gubernatorial Committee has, like, pulled all ads.
	They're like, we're done.
	Fuck you.
	And I saw someone, like, just like the... While us liberals are freaking out and shitting ourselves, and the facade of the right-wing griftosphere is nothing but steely-jawed confidence that the God Emperor is gonna win this thing in a landslide, if you actually talk to, like, Trump campaign staffers, Or people in battleground states are like, you know, the Trump campaign isn't actually getting out any door knockers.
	They're not actually doing anything to work the streets and have a ground game.
	And someone talked to some people in the background about the Trump campaign.
	They're like, oh yeah, we're not really worried about door knocking.
	We figure the gubernatorial and senatorial campaigns will Like, make that up for us, and we can focus our efforts on voter suppression and stuffing Trump's pockets with all the money he can steal from his donors.
	And I just hear those words and I think to myself, well, in Arizona, I know Carrie Lake's campaign's in the absolute dumpster fire, so she ain't gonna be getting any people out there to knock doors for Trump in Arizona.
	And in North Carolina, Robinson's just burning a hole in the ground, so And Hayley has been on the show for, I don't know, six months now, and she doesn't understand that you, the audience, can't see visual cues.
	So Hayley is showing us this thing on her phone, and me and Eric are staring at it like a dumb dog drooling as it looks at its reflection in the puddle.
	Haley!
	Haley!
	Reveal to us what your text message says via audio, the Medium podcast, so we can listen to it.
	You mentioned that Carrie Lake is just her pulling like a dumpster fire, and we have a alt paper here, like kind of punk, that gives like a yearly fake awards, and she actually just won Best Dumpster Fire.
	Outstanding.
	Again, in the all-time photographs of dying political campaigns, literally has to be Carrie Lake on stage with a giant sign next to her saying, please get off the stage.
	Just, just, just could not be a better sign of how failed your campaign is, that literally people are like, get off the stage.
	The main event wishes to speak.
	You are not the main event.
	Say goodbye now.
	Get off the stage.
	Yeah, so... I hear she's having some Jeb Bush-esque please clap moments going on too.
	I love that in the Mark Robinson commentary, the black neo-Nazi guy, Carrie Lake's just catching all kinds of strays.
	We just can't stop hitting her.
	We said that.
	That was something that he typed in all caps.
	He said, I am a black NAZI, all caps.
	And he just was like, people called him out and was like, dude, you kind of sound like a white supremacist.
	Literally Uncle Ruckus in the flesh.
	Just a human version of the Boondocks character.
	It is insane what a bizarre character Mark Robinson is.
	And I will put a button on this part, on this story, because some people decided to kind of go to the source of all of this, and people were just thinking How the fuck did this guy get to this position?
	How did he rise to the rank of Lieutenant Governor of North Carolina and now be the Republican nominee for governor?
	What was this guy before he became a public figure?
	And the answer to that question is, as someone very succinctly said it, is he's the right-wing version of the Hawktua girl.
	Uh, what I mean by this is that Mark Robinson was literally a nobody, just living his workaday life.
	And then one day he did one of those things where you go in front of a commit, you go in front of like the town hall and you get your five minutes to yell at them.
	And he went in front of the local board and he yelled about gun rights for like five minutes.
	The clip of him yelling about gun rights went viral, and because the right-wing griftosphere loves getting black people to say their talking points and to support their bullshit, he got a speaking gig with the NRA, and he started traveling around America talking about gun rights as a paid speaker for the NRA, and then one thing led to another, and they managed to run him for lieutenant governor of North Carolina, and he won.
	So this guy has no public experience.
	He has no qualifications for holding office.
	He went viral through Bullshit and then won an election in North Carolina and then he used that to win the primary for the governorship of North Carolina.
	This guy is a post turtle.
	He's just like a hurricane blows in and you just see a turtle standing, sitting on top of a post.
	You're like, how'd that turtle get there?
	And the answer was, he said the Republican version of, spit on that thing!
	Now he's almost the governor of North Carolina, instead of having the fourth best, the fourth hottest podcast in America, below three people that deny the Holocaust.
	Parentheses, Joe Rogan does not publicly deny the Holocaust, but the other two absolutely do.
	In close parentheses.
	Yeah, Mark Robinson, Bray Howdy, the American dream.
	And thank you, Republicans, for nominating such an unbelievable piece of shit in a battleground state Trump needs to win.
	God, I hope he sinks your candidate.
	God, I hope Mark Robinson carries Kamala Harris to the White House.
	It would be the greatest thing ever.
	Yes, Haley?
	Also, just real quick, because I love mentioning her every week, that Wendy Rogers is probably the only person that's sticking by his side, and she literally tweeted, uh, double down to him, so that's cool that she's like, you know, going to the porn shop five times a week wasn't enough, you gotta up those numbers.
	One bench up ten times a week.
	Don't call yourself a Black Nazi.
	Call yourself Black Hitler.
	Up your game, Mark.
	Up your game.
	You currently have rookie numbers.
	You gotta pump those numbers up, Mark.
	Oh, yeah.
	Again, and Wendy Rogers will face no rebuke for that shit.
	Literally none.
	I have to feel that, uh, that this whole, uh, Robinson thing is, uh, is Republican saying, Oh, you thought Walker was bad?
	Just you wait.
	You thought Walker was a clown show.
	Get fucked.
	Oh yeah.
	Oh my God.
	There, uh, there's this great meme I saw about Robinson and the meme is way too wordy.
	So I'll cut it down for the sake of, uh, brevity.
	But basically, the point of the meme was, it was Robinson on the one side, and the topic was a Republican primary in a swing state.
	And one side was Robinson, and the other side was just a generic white guy, like, smiling at the camera.
	And their two names were Maga Luzalot, and the other guy was Rhino Woodwin.
	And it then explains that Maga Luzalot beat Rhino Woodwin very easily in the primary.
	And then at the bottom of the meme it said, previous office holder, old fuck who'd been in office since FDR, Republican.
	Who is the new office holder?
	Mainline Normie Dem, Democratic.
	So it's just, like, that's the thing.
	It's like, these people field terrible candidates and they lose because of them.
	All you had to do was just get some random empty-suit Republican who was like, love Donald Trump, want to secure the border, guns are awesome, not so sure about the vaccine, and I'm sure we can figure out something on abortion.
	And that guy would probably win in North Carolina.
	It probably wouldn't be that heavy a lift.
	But no, you nominate the black filler for the governorship of North Carolina.
	And it's like, well, no.
	Now that guy, he's losing by like eight to 10 points now.
	And again, I know there are people who will show up and still vote for Trump, but any Trump voter that guy dissuades from showing up because he sucks so much is just poison.
	Trump needs every vote he can get in North Carolina.
	And any vote Robinson takes away from him is devastating.
	So good on you Republicans.
	Gee, I can't stop talking about this.
	People bring this up a lot.
	The only reason why Glenn Youngkin got the nomination and then won in Virginia is because the Republicans didn't allow a primary to happen.
	They nominated Youngkin by convention because they literally had some frothing lunatic who was going to win the primary over Youngkin.
	Very easily.
	And the Republican Party of Virginia was like, no, no, we're not doing that.
	So we're just going to not have a primary.
	You primary voters can't be trusted.
	We can't let them have a voice in this situation because they'll nominate a nut.
	And that's how Glenn Youngkin became the governor of Virginia.
	So like, because Republican primary voters are not allowed to talk or they'll ruin everything.
	And finally, our final topic for the week is Twitter.
	The platform for free speech.
	Unless Elon decides it's not.
	In which case, you get suspended.
	So, for the past forever, there has been this saucy story about how Iran or someone has hacked the Trump campaign and has all kinds of information and data from the Trump campaign.
	And these Iranians do not have Alaleaks or whatever they want to publish their stuff, so they've been shopping their dirt to various American news agencies who have all refused to take it, even though John Podesta's Rosito recipes were actually groundbreaking, trenchant news America needed to know about, and they aired all that shit out in 2016, and that's why we have Pizzagate.
	That I'm still arguing with people about even to this day, but apparently whatever Iran had didn't rise to the newsworthy level of John Podesta's Rosita Recipes, so they're not going to publish it.
	But today, Ken Klippenstein decided, hey, fuck it, I'm just going to dump the J.D.
	Vance dossier of OPPO research that the Iranians compiled.
	After they, uh, Glippenstein posted it on, uh, Twitter, his account was suspended.
	And recently, uh, Twitter safety has come out and said that, uh, he gave away too much private information and that's why he got suspended, which is absolute bullshit.
	They know they're lying.
	They did this because the substep.
	Yeah, are you kidding?
	If you link to the substack that contains the story, your account will be locked until you delete the link to the substack.
	And as people have pointed out, this would have been a violation of Twitter's rules before Elon, but Elon changed the rules basically to make it so it was legal to post the Hunter Biden bullshit.
	But now that it's not Hunter Biden, but it's J.D.
	Vance that's getting put in the barrel, now it's again unacceptable to post these things.
	So yeah.
	And, uh, weirdly, all the liberals, including myself, have been posting links to the fact that Klippenstein's account suspended, and have been making little comments about how Twitter, not so much about free speech, is it?
	Weird.
	Weird that the free speech platform, not so free.
	I just have to say too, because I, you know, some of the early people that got hit off Twitter and are still permanently suspended, they did not get picked up in the wave of unsuspensions when Elon let back all those Nazis, is anti-fascist researchers like Chad Loder, who was personally suspended by Elon, that's like on the request of like Andy Ngo basically, that's pretty open information, and he will never, they will never be getting
	information um there's a lot of like you know anti-fascist in the name accounts that have been permanently suspended and will never be back crime think which is an anarchist publication uh platform uh will never be back on there and it's so funny because i just saw illuminati bot sharing a quote off of crime think
	and it like blew my fucking head because first of all that's like an anarchist space and two um it's like okay crime think can't post crime think but fucking Super cool.
	So that's the free speech platform that we exist on is that I mean Amanda was locked out For reporting, for some of their reporting on the far right.
	And I posted about Amanda being locked out and myself got locked out.
	Um, so yes, it is, it is a, what people thought Twitter was before, pre-Elon takeover is what it actually is now.
	Is that one person basically has control and are making hyper political decisions on it.
	Um, yeah.
	Yeah, I mean, the thing is, I really don't care for Glenn Clippenstein at all, but this is bullshit.
	And it's very obvious bullshit.
	And from everything I've read, I haven't even looked at the JD Dossier thing, but it's basically all public statements.
	There's almost no new information in this thing.
	It really wasn't newsworthy.
	But the problem with what's happening right now is all of these publications that are saying we're not publishing this because it's not newsworthy, none of them are saying that and then explaining why they published the fucking WikiLeaks shit in 2016.
	None of them are explaining what changed in the intervening eight years between Hillary's absolutely boring-as-fuck emails getting published breathlessly, and now in 2024 people being like, yeah, we're not going to post the shit about Trump.
	Journalistic integrity.
	Whatever.
	Come at me, bro.
	bro and it's just so right so what changed your mind because people don't really remember the timeline of this that well but the grab the grab them by the pussy tape came out and the trump campaign is rocked the the There are people inside Trump's inner circle that are thinking, this thing's done.
	We're over.
	Trump's going to have to drop out, and Pence is going to have to limp to the finish line and get raffle stomped by Hillary.
	And in the intervening hours on that same day is when WikiLeaks published the Podesta emails and all that other shit to try to give cover to the pussy tape, to try to get the media to talk about something else.
	So that stuff was pivotal in that election.
	And the fact that our media had no qualms about running with that stuff, which was the basis for Pizzagate, So where did your morals, when did you get hit with a case of the morals in the last eight years?
	When did that happen?
	When Clinton stopped running for office?
	Because the Clintons just had different rules.
	You could just cover the Clintons any way you wanted, but everybody else just gets treated slightly differently than them.
	And yeah, so that, That's me, Mike Raines, Hillary Clinton's staunchest defender, now that Bart Kopp is dead.
	That's a deep cut reference for people, if you don't remember Bart Kopp.
	But, uh, yeah.
	Anyways, enough of all that nonsense, we've got a mailbag to get to.
	It started with a classic teacher's apple, which one of the students had put on my desk one day to nibble a little, I think.
	The next day it was the teacher's banana, and then it was broccoli and watermelons I got.
	Then it became more exotic things like the teacher's mango and the teacher's fusalis.
	Yes, so it may have taken a little of this.
	Yes, now you always get 8 at Extra, so it gets a little easier to get even more fruit and vegetables.
	Now you get, among other things, red onion for 14 kroner per stump and salad mix for 19 kroner per bag.
	Make fruit and vegetables cheap at Extra.
	Is your hair giving dried out bush in the Australian desert?
	Mate, you've got to try the new Aussie Super Serum that gives you 100 hours of hydration in seconds.
	Anytime, anywhere.
	Just leave it in and do the life thing while Aussie does the hair thing.
	Too easy!
	Aussie Super Serum.
	Have you tried it yet?
	Our listeners got questions.
	We got answers.
	It's time for Q & A!
	The mysterious L jumps in and asks, are the well-informed and entertaining hosts in the room with us now?
	Because I listed the Milbeck question this week by saying, Milbeck, get your questions in and get answers from our incredibly well-informed and entertaining hosts.
	And the answer to that question is, yes, they are, because I'm delusional, and I think that we're all entertaining and well-informed.
	Yep, Enchantive.
	Again, I'm going to blame that on my microphone.
	My microphone made me say the dumb words because it sucks.
	That's okay, we'll get rid of that in post.
	No, we won't.
	This is the most slapdash, poorly run podcast in the history of the world.
	Let me tell you.
	Oh my god.
	And then offer to edit.
	Come on.
	My response to Elle is fuck you, Elle, because you're not listening to this anyway.
	That's going to be a question for next week.
	Next week someone's going to be like, hey Elle, Hayley told you to fuck off last week even though you didn't hear it.
	What's your response to that?
	And then he's going to be like, well, she's right.
	I don't listen to the pod.
	What are you talking about?
	So yeah.
	So continuing our meta thing of having co-hosts ask questions, Eric asks, what sort of physical competition could presidential candidates engage in to prove their fitness?
	Biden brought up a push-up contest four years ago, but I'm thinking arm wrestling might be more fun.
	I would love to see presidential candidates play poker or chess or any other intensely mind-engaging game, because the stakes around that would be so high.
	And also, it would be really funny, because if two jimboks were playing chess, They would be playing chess at such a, like, pedestrian level compared to, like, high-level chess players that it would, like, break people's brains.
	Like, you just see, like, someone make, like, an unbelievably bad blunder in a game of chess.
	Oh, that'd be the greatest thing in the world.
	I'm just trying to imagine that, you know, like, oh man, Romney was going to cruise to election, but then he hung his queen against Obama.
	Oh god, I can't believe he did that.
	Like, people will write books about that, the move that changed America.
	Like, Romney, Queen to F6, and boom, the timeline shift.
	If only Romney saw the night pin, if only he saw that fork, then bam, he probably is president.
	Ah, it'd be so great.
	When Biden and Trump were like yelling at each other about their golf games, I wanted them to have a golf match.
	I wanted that so bad.
	That would have been the funniest thing in the world if Biden got clocked in that debate.
	But in the course of that debate, in that argument, he actually did challenge Trump to a golf game.
	Like two weeks later, they played 18 holes.
	I think the riveting television.
	It would have been so wild just watching these two old idiots just shanking and slicing balls into the woods.
	We're sitting there praying that Biden makes an 8 on the 17th hole.
	It's like, oh god, come on.
	Just get a quadruple bogey, Biden.
	You can do it.
	And the other thing is, it would have really It would have really heightened the difference in physical fitness between Trump and Biden, because Biden probably would have been walking the course, and Trump would have been in his golf cart the whole time, walking three steps per hole at maximum.
	From what people say about Trump on the golf course is that he's just in the cart all the time, and he breaks all the etiquette rules.
	He, like, rides the cart up onto the green, and then, like, gets out, walks over to his ball, putts, and then he gets back in the cart, runs over the green some more.
	But because he owns the course, he's allowed to do those things, and it's just like, oh, my God.
	Like, people would have just been able to see how unbelievably unfit Trump is and how, like, he just literally Like, Trump could not walk an 18-hole course in a day.
	Like, if you actually asked him to do that level of exertion, he would be totally blown up by, like, the fifth hole.
	He'd be like, oh, God, I had to walk five holes.
	Oh, Jesus.
	I mean, just, yeah, so.
	My main thinking with that, when I wrote that question, was that we're, I mean, we like to act all high-minded, but we're pretty superficial people.
	Like, look at the Kennedy-Nixon debate, where, you know, they say the people watching on TV said Kennedy won, and the people who listen to it on the radio said that Nixon won, because Kennedy's all fresh-faced, and I believe, as The Daily Show put it, glowing from a BJ from Marilyn Monroe.
	Yeah, oh yeah.
	And Nixon didn't wear TV makeup.
	That was the thing.
	Nixon didn't wear TV makeup.
	He was sweating.
	He hadn't shaved that morning, so he started having a five o'clock shadow.
	And I've read a lot of things, because, spoiler alert, I'm a little obsessed with the Kennedy presidency, and especially how it ended.
	The story about the radio TV thing, people aren't really sure how exactly true that is, but it definitely is true that the television viewers thought Kennedy won it.
	But the other thing that people don't bring up is that they had more debates after that.
	There were like two more presidential debates and They even had a debate where they did split screen where like Kennedy and Nixon were in different states and they did the whole like around the horn where one of them was talking on a screen and the other one was talking in the studio.
	So that was a very interesting, it was like the Kennedy-Nixon was like the first modern campaign.
	It was very different from the campaigns before that and Beyond all the other tragedies of the Kennedy assassination, the actual campaign of 1964 would have been crazy if Kennedy had lived.
	Because while Kennedy thought that Barry Goldwater was a nut and absolutely should not be the goddamn president, Goldwater and Kennedy liked each other a lot personally, and they had had some informal conversations about, hey, Goldwater was like, hey, if I win the nomination and I'm your opponent in 64, Why don't we campaign together?
	And the plan was for Kennedy and Goldwater to literally get on a train, barnstorm America, and everywhere they stopped, they would have a debate.
	Because Kennedy and Goldwater love debating each other.
	So we were going to have literally a running debate across America for the entire 64 campaign.
	And then Lee Harvey Oswald was like, that's too cool.
	Fuck that shit.
	And Merlin Kennedy.
	Yeah, that's what he did.
	He was like, I, presidential debates, I can't stand that shit.
	That drives me nuts.
	Oh God.
	Kennedy's voice is like nails on a chalkboard.
	I hate listening to that guy talk.
	The Boston accent drives me insane.
	Oh God.
	Pronounce your R's, damn it.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Oh man, if only Lee Harvey Oswald had said that, he would have spared America so much psychological trauma.
	Would have been like, damn, he killed him for a really stupid reason, but I can kind of get that.
	The Boston accent is weird.
	It's affecting in a way, isn't it?
	But yeah, and basically after Kennedy died, Lyndon Johnson really didn't fucking like Goldwater and didn't debate him, because fuck that guy.
	He's a nut.
	And also, Johnson was winning by a million.
	Why would he give him a debate?
	Screw you.
	So yeah.
	But I do think that like a physical challenge of some kind would have been really funny for Trump because he can't handle any physical activity or mental.
	The man has a brain as smooth as a marble.
	So it's really, like, if Trump wins this election, QAnon is going to be so sad when he is removed from power so quickly afterwards.
	It is going to be the ultimate bait-and-switch, and these people are going to be so angry.
	I mean, within the next year, QAnon is going to be despondent, psychotic, black-pilled.
	They're literally going to have to come up with a Kitten Beneath the Mountain Trump fan fiction about how he's going to rise from the grave as Jesus.
	Because I'm just going to say this.
	Your boy isn't long for not living in an assisted living environment.
	He does not have the mental acuity to live without support for very long.
	Again, look at his fucking eye.
	Something happened to the man.
	It's not great.
	Homeless cat with a gun asks, uh, fuck Mary- You talked forever and then you didn't let me answer!
	Go!
	Go!
	Answer!
	What's the fucking question?
	Oh, I said- I wanted them to do- I want them to do the bell challenge, you know, with the rope.
	You know how- What?
	You know, like, the rope challenge?
	Like, you- you two people cli- you- they- you climb up the rope in, like, gym class and you ding the bell?
	I would like to see a competition between our presidential candidates do that.
	Because I think it would eliminate some age... You know what I mean?
	You could not get up one step on that challenge.
	It'd be funny to watch him try, honestly.
	But the problem with that challenge is that it would also disqualify FDR, and he was probably a pretty good president.
	So, uh... What?
	What'd you say?
	That's my problem.
	Hey, not my fault if America elected a strict isolationist and let Europe fall to Nazism.
	I want to see my presidential candidates ring a bell.
	If that prick's in a wheelchair, it's on them.
	So just remember, Hayley, vicious ableist, was desperate to get into answering- I don't have good arms.
	And, you know, so, you know, maybe he would have actually done fine.
	That's fine.
	It's okay, Haley.
	Your racism is welcome here.
	So, oh man, and having said that, oh yeah, so fuck, marry, kill, lunar, Beauvoir, Lindsey Graham.
	I wouldn't have to say none of the above, but Probably marry Lindsey Graham in the sense that he would probably never get near me and our marriage would only be on paper and a sham, which would be a lot better.
	And then, uh, between Boebert and, uh, Loomer, oh god.
	I'm getting with Boebert all day.
	Loomer is so psychotic that, oh god, I can't get within 20 miles of that woman.
	Uh, I mean, Just a scary dame, that Lauren Loomer.
	A scary dame who I don't think people understand how close she got to being elected to Congress.
	If you didn't follow Laura Loomer's efforts to become a Congresswoman, her first effort was a grift.
	She ran in a very blue district where Republicans didn't care, so they let her win the nomination.
	And then she lost badly in the general election and of course claimed that it was rigged and stolen against her.
	But then, having gotten that taste of being close to electoral power, she decided to run in a Republican primary in a heavily red district.
	And if she had won that primary, she would have gotten elected to Congress.
	And she only lost by like six points to the Republican.
	It was like 53-47.
	Like, Loomer got very close to beating that guy.
	So, we were way closer to Congresswoman Loomer than you would have thought.
	It was not great.
	But, uh, thank you good citizens of blood red Florida district for voting for your boring Republican instead of voting for Laura Loomer.
	So, uh, and then she gave up and now she's the Rasputin of the Trump campaign.
	So, um, for that, I'm grateful.
	And now I'm going to throw it to the floor for you guys to play that game.
	Cause it's just, Haley jumped at me for not- Real quick, I'm just gonna say that I think I'll abstain from this question because I'm married and I work in a school district, so it would probably be unwise for me to answer any part of that.
	Hellworld, in the branch of the government, were you complete to fifth in response to questions you don't like?
	I would probably fuck Bobear, because she's hot.
	Just being honest.
	I'm so glad that Hayley is channeling her inner Elle this week.
	Elle would have snap answered that.
	That would have been 100% Elle's answer to that question.
	I would probably marry Lindsey Graham because I don't think I would have to fuck him in the marriage.
	Because I don't think he would be into me.
	I'm a woman.
	I'm a woman.
	And I would kill Laura Lunard for the good of humanity.
	We're going to edit that clip and then Peter's going to get contacted by the Secret Service.
	I would, in this scenario, fuck him.
	You gotta do the Alex Jones disclaimer.
	I would kill Laura Loomer politically.
	I don't mean that.
	I just thought it would get clipped.
	So, Hayley, have you looked up the 14 words yet?
	Can you recite them for me now?
	Uh, Leia, let me repeat them verbally.
	Yeah.
	Mebat asks, October surprise guesses.
	I really can't think of what it might be for the GOP.
	They have already so much embarrassing stuff.
	I feel the October surprise for the Republicans is if the Iranian dossier has any actual juicy shit in it and if anyone posts it.
	I don't know who I was talking to about this, but I made the point to one of my friends that this election is super weird because Every other election we have like presidential debates in October, we have stuff going on, but this upcoming Tuesday is the Walls-Vance debate, and then after that, that's the last scheduled inflection point for the entire campaign.
	Like, October 1st is the VP debate, there has been no agreement on a second presidential debate between Trump and Kamala, So, we're just gonna literally have a month where there's nothing scheduled to happen.
	Like, the media is gonna have to make something up to, like, to push a narrative, to give their, uh, some sort of, uh, commentary on the election that might push the polling one way or the other.
	Because there's nothing set up.
	There's no event where Oh shit, the two kids are going to do a thing, and then America's going to react to it, and that's going to affect how the election is going.
	That's literally going to not happen.
	JD Vance is going to be unbelievably smarmy on Tuesday.
	Tim Walz is going to call him a weird freak, and I think probably the media is going to call it a draw, because Vance is off-putting and creepy, but he's probably pretty smart, and Walz is...
	Probably.
	I don't know how Wallace is as a debater, but I figure he'll probably be fine.
	I mean, when Kamala debated Mike Pence, literally all anyone talked about was a fly landing on Mike Pence's head.
	So the entire debate sort of melted away, and the story was just, a fly landed on Mike Pence's head!
	Wasn't that weird?
	Ha ha ha ha!
	A fly!
	Just to show you how high-minded American political discourse is, the two people that were literally going to be a heartbeat away from the presidency were talking about the issues that affect America, and America's reaction was talking about a fly.
	But it's just weird.
	We're just going to literally have a month where nothing's going to happen.
	It's very strange.
	I don't exactly know what to think about that.
	My prediction for the October surprise is Valiant Thor teleports onto the set of Wolf Blitzer's Situation Room and announces that the Galactic Federation needs Trump to win.
	I love Valiant Thor.
	That account is absolute bonkers, so I'm totally with it.
	I meant the real Valiant Thor, the one who talked to Izen.
	Oh, you don't know who Valiant Thor is?
	I know of Valiant Thor, like the Twitter account.
	I didn't know there was an actual person, like there's a mythos around.
	Valiant Thor is the name of a Nordic alien who spoke to Dwight Eisenhower and explained to him about the war going on in space and the important role that America would play in it.
	Wow, because I think I've talked to you about Valiant Thor before and I thought you knew what I was getting at.
	Yeah, it's really reaching into the vaults as far as conspiracy theories go.
	Sound great.
	I'm here for Valiant Thor.
	I'm here for the greys.
	I'm here for all that good stuff.
	So yeah, Haley has died.
	So goodbye to Haley.
	Thank you.
	Something happened to her Wi-Fi in the middle of that mailbag question.
	So when you hear this, you're going to hear a weird, horribly clunky edit.
	And just roll with it.
	Just roll with it.
	We're a poorly funded, low-rent comedy podcast.
	It's great.
	So yes, not us dragging her body off.
	No, no, it wasn't.
	No, it wasn't.
	It wasn't.
	It wasn't because she died of the COVID, the COVID clot shot.
	And we had to like, put a blanket over her and get rid of her.
	Yes.
	Yes, exactly.
	There's never been a Haley.
	We've always been at war with Eurasia.
	Person.
	Yeah, the Stalin photo.
	It's like, just photoshop Haley out of the hell world.
	ConfidentlyBefuddled asks, what's the coolest plane?
	I'd say the X-Men jet.
	That's not any bad.
	I was kind of in the real world.
	I just kind of like the stealth bomber because it's just so weird.
	It's just such a... When it first showed up and it was just so weird looking, it was like, man, that is... I'm like, that is... I can't believe that's how that works.
	I can't believe this is how you avoid radar detection, is by just having this weirdly shaped plane.
	And then I played, I forget if it was like Battle of, it was either Battle of Britain or a game called like Secrets of the Luftwaffe.
	And they basically had like a prototype of the stealth bomber in 1945.
	But they never actually made one.
	Because at the end of the war, the Germans were just making all this weird shit, just throwing it at a wall to see if it would stick.
	Yeah, like the super gun Dora.
	Yeah, yeah, they had the super gun.
	They had the, I mean, they had the Messerschmitt, which was an actual jet, but then they had that weird little plane, it was like basically just a flying bomb, and it was like, they would just shoot it into the air, and then it would just like glide down, because that was all it was, and that plane was like so unbelievably unstable, it would explode on the runway sometimes, because the two chemicals inside it would just mix and blow it up, So if they told you to fly that plane, they were basically asking you to kill yourself.
	It was like a German version of the kamikaze.
	But yeah, they were just, they were coming up with all kinds of crazy stuff to try to like, save their asses.
	And they were probably pretty happy that Werner Von Braun created the V2 rocket in that case.
	Oh yeah, that was basically the unmanned version of that plane, yeah.
	And they had this, it didn't have all the sharp angles of the stealth bomber, but basically they were working on a plane that was kind of just a giant V that they were going to fly.
	It would have been really interesting, but it wouldn't have helped them because, uh, they didn't have the... America and the Soviet Union at that point had way too much production in oil, so no wonder weapon was gonna work.
	I actually... I saw this, like, really funny video that was the standard, how could Germany win World War II, and...
	Basically, their response was, if Germany doesn't win by the summer of 1945, then Berlin's the last parking lot, because America is going to develop a nuke.
	And that was the plan with the nukes the whole time, was to hit Germany with them.
	The only reason they didn't was because Germany lost by conventional means.
	And then smash cut to Japan.
	We will never surrender!
	It's like, well, we're going to find out what never means real quick.
	Nuke the shit out of you.
	Yeah, so yeah, Stealth Bomber, I go with that.
	Amanda Scatlin asks, why do you have to be a science denier, have a soft spot for slavery, and can't keep thoughts or hands to yourself to be a GOP candidate in 2024?
	Mostly because that's how you get oxygen in the room.
	I mean, we covered it earlier about how Mark Robinson is literally the Lieutenant Governor of North Carolina because he went viral doing a pro-gun speech at a town hall.
	That's how Lauren Boebert got viral.
	She did a gun rights speech in Colorado and became a Congresswoman because of it.
	And it's so crazy how normalized all this Q-Sub has been.
	You hear Marjorie Taylor Greene talking about the Uniparty.
	I was like, when did we get to this stage?
	Right.
	When did being a nut become a prerequisite for being a Republican?
	I hear all these people, like, oh, Biden and Pelosi always talk about how we need a strong Republican Party.
	It's like, no, we need a sane Republican Party.
	Because the problem is that eventually, at some point, the economy will Turn the shit or the current president will get embroiled in a scandal that is devastating.
	Something is going to happen where Republicans are going to win an election.
	And we need it to be a situation where when they win, it doesn't destroy the foundations of the fucking country.
	And as a result of that, it's like, fuck, we need sane people running the other party.
	So when they do win, it's not terrible for us all.
	And that's what sucks.
	It just really sucks that that's where we're at in America right now, that Republicans are just a bunch of barking at the moon lunatics.
	And it's not great.
	And so that brings us to our final question, which usually involves a lot of people, but now only involves Eric and me, which is what are you looking forward to?
	Uh, you know, I actually did think about this because like it, it kills me.
	Like when you asked the question and Ellen and Haley are like, uh, and I'm like, no, I'm going to do better.
	I'm going to answer the Helen's question.
	And I totally lost everything that I had planned in my head.
	Um, let's see.
	Well, I got, um, I mean, right now I'm going to school, so I'd say I'm looking forward to the end of the term for that, because the two classes I'm taking are just brutal.
	And I'm taking them because I have to take them for my degree.
	It's not necessarily stuff I want to take.
	So if my professor's listening to this, I'm sorry, but that's how I feel.
	I hear that.
	I am looking forward to the fact that I managed to control management at my work to let me do a little training of our dealers.
	And I got to do that for a few hours this last week.
	And hopefully having gotten my foot in the door on that process, I will be able to continue doing that because I love explaining things to people.
	I love training people up.
	I love all that kind of stuff.
	Yeah, but I really do enjoy that, and it was just really fun, and I was teaching the New Dealers craps, which is a game I love to talk about, so that was just a ton of fun, and I hope that that continues.
	So that's all great, and again, we're, as El would obviously say as he rolls his eyes, we are in the middle of football season, so we have more exciting football this week to deal with, so I'm always pumped for that.
	Boom.
	That's been the podcast.
	It has been an incredibly long podcast.
	Way too long.
	Al would have never allowed this.
	He would have cracked the web and gotten us out of here way before this.
	So thanks to Frosty.
	Thanks to DJ Minimal Effort.
	If you got money, give it to me.
	Give me money!
	Go to patreon.com slash pokerpolitics.
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	I make Alex Jones look so good in comparison.
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	That you don't have to worry about your data?
	Data that is safely stored in order?
	That Visma is like security?
	-
	And before we finish, the board has decided to cut the electricity bill at the office.
	Last year we used 32,000 kroner on the electricity bill for 12 employees.
	A lot, but the board... What are we going to drink?
	It's water in the spring, says the board.
	Are you the board?
	Is it?
	Have a great week, and greetings to the board.
	Save the electricity bill.
	Switch to AISBedrift.
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	Hey guys, where's the bread and milk I bought yesterday?
	What?
	It was your bread?
	Yes.
	What could have happened?
	As a Coop member you're lucky enough to get a pack price of a liter of milk and a loaf of bread for only 48 kroner.
	Cooprix.

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