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July 11, 2024 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:44:36
Adventures In HellwQrld Episode #197: Deep State controls Europe.

This week we deal with the latest incoherent Trump speech. Also we get into the horrors of Project 2025 and how Trump and QAnon are running from it and we celebrate the UK and France voting against the Nazi parties in both their countries. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Summer is short, so remember to slow down.
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♪ I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
PokerandPolitics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week, I am joined, as always, by Haley, a.k.a.
going on, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against
people.
Listener discretion advised.
Hello, everybody.
I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week I'm joined as always by Haley, a.k.a.
Arizona Right Watch.
Hello, everybody.
I am Mike Rains.
I'm currently in hell.
It's like 118 degrees Fahrenheit.
Phoenix is a testament to man's hubris.
We've known this for a long time.
Yeah.
And we were also joined by the mysterious El.
Hello, my beautiful babies.
It is I, the El Duicidel!
Beautiful.
And I'm not smeltering in 118 degree heat, thankfully.
I don't know how hot it is outside because I'm in a room that is 72 degrees and I like to keep it that way.
Oh yeah, that's my life.
I am all about that central air life.
I think I'm a frosty little bugger at 68 degrees.
I like to stay even colder.
Yeah I mean I could I could like I'm using a window unit but it's in a small room so that I never have to take that shit below low cool to get the job done.
I can only imagine what the decadence of a high cool blasting at 10 would be.
I can get this motherfucker down to like 52 degrees.
I'm sure right in here.
Yeah yeah you could be like the uh the like the Form for like how Bernie Sanders likes his hotel rooms.
Like 60 degrees was what the senator from Vermont wanted his rooms at.
I'm the same way.
Literally first thing I do when I get to a hotel room, as low as it goes baby.
Maximum down.
You gotta have it.
Because first of all, there's like a thousand blankets and comforters on each one of them beds, and second of all, if you're at like a big event, like, it's gonna get warm.
Like, a lot of people get to the hotel and they're just like, oh man, it's like super cold in here.
It's just like, well, you know, wait until you've been out partying and doing stuff for 14 hours and you come back to your hotel room at roughly the same time like 3,000 other people in your vicinity do.
It's like, it's gonna be warm, you know?
It's not gonna be cool.
No, exactly.
I'm all about maximum chilliness whenever possible, so yeah.
When me and Hayley were in Dallas, oh, I was in an igloo when I was back in my room.
Because, boy howdy!
The moment you escaped the hotel, you just got hit by that powerful Dallas swamp air.
I have, I mean, it's like, oh my God.
Like, uh, like this, this summer currently in like in the Boston is really muggy.
We were in Dallas in like October and it was still oppressively muggy.
It was just like, oh my God, you are just, just swimming through the air as you walk around the streets of Dallas to look at where the president got shot a long time ago.
Well, when the bombs are going off, imagine how hot the boys fighting proudly in the mountains of Appalachia are going to feel.
Have you guys heard about any of this stuff on Twitter?
This is what I wanted to bring up in the unstructured segment.
There's been some debate on the internet about whether or not Appalachian rednecks could like quote-unquote take the US government and at first I thought it had to be parody but like it did like certainly the comments weren't I mean otherwise that that would have been a lot of parody like I mean it's so many people were just like yeah
Yeah, I saw the Ewok trap that someone posted where a tank was, like, crawling up the side of a mountain and the Rednecks had, like, set up a giant rock to drop on the tank as it went under the giant rock, which, obviously.
Because that's how the U.S.
military, like, conducts tank warfare.
It has one lone tank with no support just creaking up the side of a mountain that can barely support it.
And then the tank driver's just like, hey, what's that giant thing overhanging the path we're on?
Man, now that let's go under it.
Oh no, a rock!
Holy shit!
Ah, if only we had known!
I know we've had this debate, but I'm just going to go ahead and say it.
We have, we have bombs.
Yeah!
All these people ignore the fact that the U.S.
military has an air force.
We have airstrikes.
To say nothing of drones.
These days we can just remote control a thing up to your face and blow your brains out with it.
But if we don't want to do that, we can just send a jet over and just destroy your everything.
Like, that's how we did it back in the good old days, you know?
Like, we didn't exactly win in Vietnam, but we had to fight that, we had to fight that fight a world away.
Like, imagine in our backyard how efficient we'd be at burning everything, fucking everything to the ground!
There would be no more Appalachia!
That's right!
It would be Appo-Usta, because it used to be a place.
Yes.
However, I do think, again, I've not seen this discourse whatsoever, but Um, if the government fell, if we were in a different situation and the government just fell entirely, I think the good folks of Appalachia would do well in the situation.
They would rise to the occasion.
I mean, they would sit still to the occasion, like if they hung out in their home, sure.
And I can't imagine, like, if the government fell, anybody who managed to get, like any warlord or whatever, who managed to get his hands on some tanks, I don't think would be like, let's, let's take them unsecured up the mountains to Appalachia!
Like, I feel like they'd just be like, okay, the hillbillies can have Appalachia, that's fine.
Like, we don't give a fuck about that.
Oh yeah, and they can enjoy their no-fertile land and their mountains.
I mean, they would literally become like inland Viking raiders, pretty much.
Just like, oh no, we need sustenance, time to go attack the people of the farmlands in order to take their crops.
I do love how Ewok-ish it all sounds, though.
It's just like, yeah, a not-properly-organized military force without air support could never take Appalachia.
Because they've got the candy, they're savvy, they've got the terrain advantage, they know these woods like the back of their hand.
Oh, I got caught in a bear trap!
Oh, jeez!
I just remember someone had a video about how, like once America fell and they were like,
they basically made it like a presupposition that America's gonna fall.
We don't have to worry about nothing on that front.
Like America's gonna fall, don't worry your pretty little head.
And then from there, what are we gonna have after the ashes?
And this guy literally does a quick little one-liner.
As long as we all agree to non-aggression, we can all create our little city-states that will be run the way we want.
And you crazy leftists can have your socialist utopia, and us right-wingers can have an authoritarian, tyrannical government.
It'll all be great.
You really avoided the whole issue when you said we're all going to agree to non-aggression.
Because guess what?
We're not.
Whichever places have the best land, there's going to be fights over that land.
Also, I'm just fighting.
I'm just fighting no matter what.
If society crumbles, come at me.
And also, for the record, even in a situation where we did that crazy thought experiment and we all just segregated into our own little bubbles and then set up our own societies and saw how it was going to work, eventually when it came down to brass tacks, I know which of those tribes is gonna be the one to just be like, maybe us just club enemies and take their shit.
Because I could also, in my mind, conjure which of those two areas has the best shit.
Even if they don't have the best land.
It's just like, ah yes, a liberal town with its culture and its diversity and its food that tastes good and isn't all just deep fried ranch dressing and like all the good shit in life and then, you know.
Redneck town with a bunch of people with guns and no one to use it on because they guaranteed that non-aggressive fact.
Or did they?
You know?
Everyone take to the Great Lakes where fresh water is abundant.
Oh, you think there'd be a little fighting over fresh water, maybe?
Oh, man.
Bro, I'm gonna fight the smallest, most sustainable spot of fresh water the furthest away from fucking anyone.
That's not true.
I'm just gonna blow my brains out, day one.
See you later!
Ah, so society's collapsed?
Well, see ya.
I'm out.
Deuces.
Yeah, you just turn on the TV and they're just like, and now society has ended.
It's riding the streets.
Like, well, I lose.
I am not built for that shit.
Not in the slightest.
The idea of living minus comfort.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Like, what are we even doing here?
Like, why?
That sounds so nonsensical.
To toil away, hoping to regain comfort.
No, thanks.
You know, I know what I'm missing.
See you later.
Yeah.
And I remember people talking about that kind of stuff, and they were just like, oh yeah, when Trump gets in, all this shit's going to happen, and bop, bop, bop.
And I was just looking at it saying, You know, you could just vote for Biden instead of bleeding out in a 7-11 after six months fighting in the Trump wars in America's streets.
And someone replied to me and said, you think you're going to last six months?
And I was like, Hey, I'm being a little optimistic here.
Come on, give me a break.
Did I get six months of life in the post-Trump America civil war before I am gunned down and I bleed out?
I'm bleeding out in the parking lot of a 7-Eleven!
I didn't have a glorious death!
Come on, just give me six months of agony, that's all I ask.
Well, I mean, retroactively it'll become glorious as tales of the Battle of the 7 and 11 will be told.
They'll be like, dude, so many proud fighters lost their life at the Battle of 7 and 11.
so many proud fighters lost their life at the Battle of 7 and 11.
Yeah.
That's...
Okay, that's, I guess that's enough nonsense to start with.
Let's get into our Amuse-Bouche-y!
It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
Get ready for the Amuse-Bouche!
Let's kick it off with our former, and if you believe a lot of the polls, soon-to-be future President Donald Trump getting his Babylon-like the place.
Get it?
It's like Babylon.
Anyway, yeah.
This dude is incoherent.
It's just not as important to the voters as our current president being incoherent.
People don't talk about it quite as much, except for us, because we love talking about how Donald Trump is a stupid idiot.
Oh yeah, never, nobody ever talks about that.
Well, to be fair, the past week, very few people, I mean, he could say whatever he wants this week.
It doesn't matter, like, as long as people are still, as long as Joe Biden is still, like, arguing over whether or not he's running, Donald Trump is immune to scrutiny from the regular media.
They don't give a fuck.
Yeah, the first time in the last, like, seven years, the media has stopped focusing all their attention on Trump.
That's... Which is hilarious.
I mean, he must be seething with anger.
Like, even though it's a... What a double-edged win for him.
I was just in a hotel a few months ago during his trial and they just had a picture of Trump for like a fucking hour because the trial wasn't going on.
And it's not like there's news to fucking report on in the rest of this world.
So they just had a stand-in photo of Trump on the screen with a countdown to when the trial began.
We absolutely never talk about Trump in the media.
Go ahead.
What we talk about Trump's criminality and other flaws, but the fact that the biggest thing in America right now is, does our president have dementia?
And yet the guy challenging for the presidency literally goes on stage, and every time he does, he's like, look at these signs of dementia!
Look at my scattered thinking!
Look at my babbling incoherence!
And the media's just like, oh, look at that scamp!
Oh, I just want to tussle his hair!
Oh, he's so adorable!
And it's just like, yeah, so it's just like, oh, Trump got that guy's name wrong again.
Lolz is so funny.
Or like, Trump went on a tangent about something that could be completely unrelated to anything.
Like golf, or sharks, or, you know, just talking about weird stuff the way an old man would, instead of talking about things that matter, like a president would.
Like, you know, usually at least people get their shots in, but I'm here to tell you, as your regular man, as the person on the podcast who represents our average Joe barely scraping the surface of the news, nobody cares about what Donald Trump has to say this week.
I have no idea what he said, whatever this Moose Boosh segment is actually about, I literally don't know what it is.
So...
Yeah.
So at one point, in his Incoherent and Tirade, he talked about a waitress.
And he mentioned that the waitress was beautiful.
But then he got weirdly defensive about the fact that you can't quote-unquote mention the physical.
And then he started explaining how she was beautiful spiritually, or internally.
Like, she had a great personality, was basically what he was trying to say.
As he was trying to explain how you can't talk about people's physical appearances, he then started blurting out about how he called Chris Christie a fat pig, and people got mad at him about it.
But, you know, hey, Chris Christie, could use some time on the treadmill, you giant tub of guts.
And it was just, like, that's the kind of non sequitur that this man has in his brain, where he's just like, I saw this beautiful woman, but I can't talk about that because, you know, whatever.
By the way, Chris Christie is fat, and when I said that, people got mad at me, too.
It's just... Because, again, Chris Christie, who the fuck are you?
All I remember is that Trump tried to kill you with COVID a long time ago, when he did kill Herman Cain.
Which is great, because, like, yeah, exactly.
And all of that, I'm assuming, was in the middle of whatever thought he was having, and then he was just like, so anyway, that's why I do or don't support unions.
Good night.
Yeah, I find this whole thing funny because it's like, the cameras have been on Trump 24-7 for years at this point.
any like you really have to really have to follow some logic chains to connect it to
whatever the initial political related thing was, you know?
Yeah, I find this whole thing funny because it's like the cameras have been on Trump 24
7 for years at this point. And it's like, yeah, we see every fucking flub because he's
an old piece of shit who shouldn't be running. And now that for once the cameras are on Biden
24 7, we're also realizing he's an old piece of shit. And it's like people are shocked
that these are both old pieces of shit. And it's like, that's just what happens when the
cameras are actually on someone for this long. You'll see all their flubs and see how broken
their brain actually is. And now people are shocked because they're seeing that Biden's
brain isn't all there either. And it's just like, yeah, maybe.
Maybe the camera shouldn't have just been on a photo of Trump's face for hours at end, reporting nothing.
Just reporting nothing.
Yeah, I think that for a lot of people, we all knew that Biden was old, but your regular American person doesn't really listen to what Joe Biden has to say all that often, but the debate is a big enough thing that they'll at least look up clips of it.
And so, I think it just got a lot of people who are just like, sure, they're both old, whatever, it's a push.
And then, like, you see them actually, like, you see what being old actually does to you when you have to talk about important matters, and you're just like, ooh, both of these guys are...
Feel bad.
Do not want.
Right.
The thing is, is that I, to me, it's like Biden is inarticulate because again, he's never been a great speaker.
He's had a stutter his whole life and he's very old.
So I just think that like for Biden, he's just trying to fight all those things that are going on in an old person brain and speaking as best he can, which is tough.
Whereas with Trump, his brain is actual pudding.
He's actually an incoherent buffoon.
At least when Biden loses his train of thought, it stops him from getting into any further trouble.
But, like, Donald Trump's, like, train of thought, just jumping whatever track he wants, means that he, like, started talking about how hot this waitress was, and then I guess caught himself in the middle of that, so they started just, like, scrambling to talk about how beautiful her personality was, and then eventually settled on just calling Chris Christie fat.
You know, like, and all of that gets you in further trouble.
Like, if he didn't catch himself, he was just like, yeah, this waitress, she was pretty hot, she had a huge set of titties, and I just wanted to, she had an apple I wanted to take a bite out of, like, and then, you know, it's just like, yep, that's much worse, you know?
Luckily, he caught himself, but in catching himself, he just sort of scrambled, and he could have said anything.
Right.
That's the difference, is when Biden begins a sentence, he knows how he wants it to end.
He may not get it there, but he knows the plan.
With Trump, the moment he starts talking, he has no idea how this story's gonna end.
So assuming you're in a position of power where somebody might have to be behind you with a broom to clean up your mess, you know, of the two, I feel like the sleepy pile is a lot easier to broom up than the fucking pile that was like...
Talking about how hot the lady was and then settled on calling a political opponent fat.
Super funny.
Or, you know, ranting about how they would rather get electrocuted than eaten by a shark.
And that's why I don't like electric batteries.
What does a shark have to do with anything?
What the fuck?
What is even happening?
Yeah.
And the other big thing that came out, I mean, again, if you go through the whole video of all the clips, he's so fucking gone.
And the other thing that is really interesting to me is he's always wearing his hat now.
Like, back in the day, Trump was always letting his dumb, weird comb-over fly around, but now he seems ashamed of the comb-over.
Like, something has happened to his lion-like mane where he's just like, I gotta put the MAGA hat on top of that.
Boris Johnson wore it better and he's pissed off.
He just looks at photos of Bojo and he's like, damn it!
That man outshined me.
I've been emasculated on the bad air front.
I mean, Bojo was a much more classically funny buffoon.
Yes.
Donald Trump's funny moments are just funny but grim.
Because he's just like, oh man, because he won one time.
He might win again.
There's a chance.
Anyway, enough talking about Donald Trump.
Let's talk about Barron Trump.
Who is that again?
That's his kid, right?
Yeah, that's his very young kid.
What's Barron Trump doing in the news?
Did he get like a cushy internship someplace?
Barron has basically been in the general vicinity of Donald recently, and apparently Trump made a comment about how, welcome to the scene, Barron Trump, and the crowd roared.
And this has unlocked a lot of the QAnon Barron Trump fan fiction.
Where Barron Trump is a super genius, an elite level hacker, an expert at all things.
And because Barron is also incredibly tall, he's like 6'5", all these people project all this stuff onto him that he is his father's vengeance.
They see what they're doing to his dad.
He will remember.
He will never forgive.
Like, Barron Trump is going to be the, like, 61st President of the United States and just bring the hammer down on all those who, like, tried to do wrong to Pop Pop.
Yeah, this is where Groyper Nazis and QAnon intersect, because I think they see themselves in Barron, and they also want him to be Emperor of the Universe.
Yeah, yeah.
That's pretty much it.
They just see this 18-year-old in the Trump family, and they're a bunch of teenage 20-year-old incels, and they're just like, that could be me!
I could have been the spawn of Donald Trump and wield real power, and be incredibly tall, and crush women and minorities.
It'd be so great!
Oh, if only I could be Barron Trump!
Like, the Barron Trump story just gets bigger, bolder, and more insane with every retelling.
Even in Fall Cabal, when we reviewed that, Janet Oh was talking about how Barron Trump was going to be the one to break down the thumbnail Vladimir Putin gave Trump in the soccer ball and find all the deep state's crimes upon it.
Oh yeah, because he's a kid hacker genius.
Yes.
How old is he now?
He recently turned 18, because I've seen people saying, like, now that Barron's 18, he's fair game.
And it's like, why?
Why isn't anyone taking a shot at Barron?
He hasn't done anything.
No, sexually.
Because as conservatives, all we do is watch clock on that, you know?
And sometimes... It's always 5 o'clock somewhere, you know?
Yeah.
They're all pedophiles is what I'm getting at.
So, yeah, wow.
I hadn't seen Baron in so long.
I don't think society at large has seen Baron in so long that I didn't know that he was now, like, technically a legal adult.
Which makes this make a little more sense.
Because I thought he was pulling a Kim Jong-un, who's been doing this with, like, his daughter recently, where she just, like, materialized one day, and he started bringing her to important shit.
And everyone's just like, oh, guess we see what's happening here.
I guess we know what's going on with this.
It's just like, who's that again?
It's just like, this is the daughter of our great general.
They're just like, oh, well, incredible.
That's so good.
We love that for you.
I guess you're going to be breaking that whole male-run stereotype thing because your daughter's about to become empress for life when you expire.
Hey there, pops!
So progressive.
Dude, look how progressive they are.
That was like, oh my god, Kim Jong-un has a sister and there's way too many people who are fanboys about her.
And it's just like, no, she's still part of a family that is a murderous, dictatorial regime.
Yeah, I mean, through the power of...
Fucking like, you know, dictator nepotism.
She's like their state defense minister or something, you know, right?
Like, she was the one out there giving soundbites about fucking how South Korea doing their live fire drills was like suicidal.
Like, she was like, it's suicidal delusion for them to be doing that.
Because of course, we're gonna have to kill all of them.
I guess.
And people online are like, oh, my waifu!
It's like, no!
That's not how this works!
Well, that's because white incels just love any Asian woman.
Like, any Asian woman that is not what they consider to be overweight becomes waifu.
They just slot that right in.
All the other stuff is irrelevant.
They're just like, not overweight and Asian.
Boom!
Waifu it is.
Please sleep with me, waifu senpai.
Yes!
Okay, enough talking about horrible incels.
It's time for us to talk about the blistering hot hellscape that is Arizona.
Everyone's favorite state, except for anybody that is not in Arizona.
Hi Haley!
Hi!
Arizona correspondent Haley again, Arizona Right Watch, here to tell us about Arizona, where it is almost 120 degrees Fahrenheit.
That's a lot Celsius for people who want to do the conversion.
Yes.
It is.
A British person would die immediately upon contact of Arizona.
They'd be like, you what?
It's really hot, isn't it?
Yes, yes it is.
Take that, Britain.
Yeah, it's been pretty hot.
It's been like over 115 most days this week so far.
115 most days this week so far and it was a hundred and eighteen the other day
which broke a record which is not fun So yeah.
That makes it 111 degrees too hot for Drake and or Dr. Disrespect.
Boom, got him roasted.
So yeah, Arizona.
Just some updates, I guess.
The Walter Ringfeld guy, the guy who stole some election equipment.
I've been just kind of following his case a little bit.
There's now conspiracies about him because his trial is not set to start until after the election.
The placeholder date is literally the day after the election, so this is causing people to be like, oh, they don't want you to know the truth until literally the day after the election.
So that's where it's going for now.
That's just the I'm just going to keep following that because I'm sure he'll be relevant for months to come.
But so that's the little update.
And also, as far as the trial, it's totally not going to start the day after the election placeholder dates.
That's just how it works.
It's just kind of like a little schedule that it puts in.
I'm currently dealing with a trial right now where none of those dates have been correct.
They're actually Years off in some cases.
So yeah, it's not going to start literally the day after the election.
It's just kind of like they have to technically put in the schedule and then things get pushed back because witnesses get called, evidence gets examined, you know, and then the trial has to start.
So anyway, that's that with the guy that stole the election equipment and also a bunch of other shit around town, including like, 20 grand worth of vintage jewelry from the Phoenix Art Museum, which I thought was so fucking cool.
That is intense that he was like, you know what?
Screw robbing a bank or stealing jewelry.
I'm going to rob exhibits from an art museum.
I'm going to go that extra mile to do some fucking caper shit.
Hey, I'm being a true American.
So anyway, that was that news.
Elon Musk, the piece of shit who unfortunately runs Twitter, has been kind of going a little bit hard on spreading disinformation about Arizona elections leading up to The election.
Um, which is super cool.
Um, he's, he's, he's, he's, uh, basically insinuating that we, um, allow undocumented immigrants to vote.
Uh, and you know, he's, he's, he's, he's carefully wording his, uh, his statements to not fully say that we are like um just letting like so quote-unquote illegals um vote but he is like carefully explaining some legal technicalities to make it sound
Like we do allow undocumented immigrants to vote.
So he was saying that Arizona requires proof of citizenship to vote in state elections but explicitly does not for federal elections.
This is messed up.
So what he's saying is actually kind of technically true but he's trying to present to his audience that like We are not requiring proof of citizenship for the presidential election, which is the federal law.
It's not our decision, it's the federal law.
So he's kind of making it seem like Arizona is specifically carving out an exception for undocumented immigrants to vote in federal elections, which it's like, you're just explaining how the federal law works and we have to adhere to that.
And no, like, undocumented immigrants don't get to vote in elections.
That actually voids their, that actually gets them in a little bit of trouble when it comes down to getting their citizenship.
So anyway, and he's kind of just repeating this over and over.
This is not the first time he's done this.
And Steve and Richard are a recorder, the Maricopa recorder, the one who often gets death threats.
invited Elon to see the whole process of elections and kind of like our lead uh he's he's really influential on Twitter and also just in general is a good source during elections data guru aka Garrett Archer was also going tit for tat with Elon um basically like hey I know you're a smart guy but you're just uninformed about our elections and it's like The media was also like, Oh, Elon's smart on a lot of things, but he's just misinformed on Arizona.
And it's like, that's not, that's not what's fucking happening.
That's not what's fucking happening.
This guy is specific.
He is targeting our elections.
Like he is spreading disinformation and attacking our elections via his platform.
That's what's happening.
He absolutely knows that he is spreading bullshit.
That's all he fucking does is spread bullshit.
Quit being small baby bean little Elon doesn't just know about our election processes.
That motherfucker is a fascist who has literally bragged about doing coups where the fuck he wants.
Like, he interacts with neo-Nazis and white supremacists.
He subscribes to them on Twitter and interacts with them constantly.
He's a fucking Ashley St.
Clair fanboy.
Like, give me a fucking break on this shit with like, Elon just doesn't know.
He's a fascist.
He's a fascist.
He does not like democracy in America.
The end.
And yeah, that's gonna be used.
This is gonna be the first presidential election with you on Twitter.
And I don't think the media understands what's happening.
Oh, I think they understand.
I just don't think... I think they like it.
So, I mean... I think they understand, and they're just not ready for the jelly.
I think they're anticipating some amount of jelly, and there's more jelly to be had.
Oh, there's gonna be a lot of jelly.
Yeah, I love that idea.
They're like, oh, if I just could speak to Elon, I could clear this up for him.
It's like, no, you can't.
No.
He fucking wants to believe this shit.
He's not gonna fucking change his mind just because you explained the facts to him.
He would even take that tour for a media, a media, like, like, Just extravaganza, and then continue to spread bullshit about your elections.
Like, that's what's gonna happen.
You know?
So that's what's going on with Elon, which, you know, yeah.
I'm tired of people not understanding who Elon is.
Like, he's very open about it.
So yeah, that's what's going on with Arizona elections.
I'm sure absolutely everything's going to go fine during the election season.
And I'm just going to bring it up real quick because Mike and I have been texting about it back and forth all week.
Neither of these people are from Arizona, but Turning Point USA is an Arizona, a Phoenix-based organization.
The ambassadors for Turning Point USA, the former ambassadors, the ambassador program ended.
They ended it specifically because of a woman named, is it Morgan Ariel or Ariel Morgan?
Yeah. Who cares?
She's just, yeah.
She started to get a little bit too spout and anti-Semitism and Holocaust denial on the
timeline.
And they just scrapped the entire ambassador program, which was basically like this.
this separate influencer program they have.
They have a ton of influencer programs and coalitions.
This was just one of them.
Um, so yeah, the ambassador program ended a while ago, and a few of the ambassadors this weekend have decided to just, like, literally say, fuck it, I'm just gonna say the Holocaust didn't happen.
Including Evan Kilgore, who used to be a Turning Point ambassador, and, um, would, uh, he was part of their, like, They kind of allow you to hire certain influencers through their website and then they're like brought to your college campus via Turning Point USA and sponsored by Turning Point USA.
He used to be part of that program.
And just in general do like events for Turning Point USA.
Um, and this weekend, yeah, he tweeted basically that, like, fuck it, I'm saying it, uh, I don't believe 6 million Jews were murdered in the Holocaust, 300,000 at most.
And he just kept kinda tweeting Holocaust denial shit, and then Morgan Ariel jumped on it and, uh, was like, what's the Holocaust?
Oh yeah, and then he used the term guerrilla, which is an anti-semitic slur.
So yeah, they were just basking in it.
They were just washing in their anti-semitism.
And like, you know, the Ambassador Program may have ended and there's no official stamp on them anymore on the website.
But Evan Kilgore was just featured as a special guest at the People's Convention.
Me and Amanda kind of briefly mentioned that there was like a crossover between AFPAC and the People's Convention, which was Turning Point's event.
And yeah, Evan Kilgore was one of them.
He had the both VIP like photo for both AfPak and the People's Convention.
So like even though they ended this ambassador program, Turning Point has been still incredibly
friendly with these freaks.
And honestly like this is just two of them.
There's a lot of people that I know personally that are just like way too accepted in the
Turning Point sphere that are explicit neo-Nazis and Holocaust deniers and you know involved
with I mean active clubs and other really extreme groups.
So it's just, it's just completely, that used to be like Kirk's thing was he wasn't like the Grapers and all that, but his rhetoric is getting even more and more extreme.
He's been on this like lately, like I want all the immigrants out of my fucking country.
I want my country back type rhetoric.
So it's almost hard to see the distinction at this point besides like explicitly loving
Hitler.
So that's where Turning Point USA is at this point.
Cool.
Yeah, their big thing was like, we're going to keep Nick Fuentes and all his scum out
Like, turning points are cut above that kind of shit.
And now they're just all grapers.
They're like, Nick won.
Nick just won, and now everyone's a graper.
And that's where right-wing politics in America is going now, where it's just, you know, if you think we're bad now, just give us another week.
We're going to get worse.
Yeah, they keep Fuentes out because that's the one that everybody knows.
That's the one the media reports on.
It's like, if you ID a Groyper in politics, you have to like six degrees of separation how they know Nick Fuentes and you better hope they have photos with Nick Fuentes because that's the only way people will care.
As if this isn't an entire little neo-nazi movement that just happens to center around Fuentes at the top.
So yeah, the Gripers are infesting Turning Point USA.
It's just, they keep Fuentes out, so there's still this illusion that they're separate.
But anyway.
Unfortunately, whites live whites, you know?
Yeah.
There's only so not racist you can be, and there's only so far away you can be from thinking that actually maybe Hitler actually had a couple of good ideas as well as all the bad ones, you know?
I'm not saying he was a great man, but...
Let's not judge everybody based on their worst moment, you know?
Perhaps we can agree to misunderstood is misunderstood, yeah.
Now, I frequently believe in violence to solve my problems, but when it comes to punching a Nazi on the streets, I just can't abide that.
No, sir.
What are they doing to harm you, you know?
Fucking idiots.
They've got everything backwards because, I don't know, they're scared.
They're scared of everything.
They're so afeared for no reason.
Well, I know what the reason is.
The reason is religion, but we're not here to talk about that on this political podcast.
Instead, we're here to talk about headline news!
From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
In a surprise turn of events, I think, for everybody who was keeping an eye on it, it was apparently suddenly decreed to be conservative battling season across the pond.
Mike, let's get into it.
What's going on with our surprise turnaround and fortune in our abroad election cycles?
So the surprise was the fact that France decided to not go Nazi.
Basically, the way French elections work is they have a first round of elections, and then if you don't get more than 12.5% of the vote, you are pushed out.
And the election then becomes just between those who got the higher amount.
It's kind of like the way Georgia handles runoffs in America, only in Georgia it's just strictly the top two.
France has some other provisos that let more than two people run in the runoff.
After the first round, the Nazi party, which is led by Le Pen, a fascist woman who got the party from her dad.
He was a literal Nazi.
We're not talking just like, we're not being, you know, exaggeratory here.
We're talking descendants of the OG Nazis.
Sure, but I mean, be that as it may, like, a woman?
Yuck.
What are we doing here?
Were there no men available?
Way to not have a male heir, Nazi Le Pen.
If we have no men to choose from, then the left has already won, you know?
So in the first round, the Nazi Party, they were in the lead in a lot of the seats, because this was an election for France's version of Congress or Parliament.
So there was all this tumult and all this freaking out.
And then what happened was in the second round of voting, You basically have three factions in France.
You have the left, you have Macron and his like center-left party, and then you have the Nazis.
And in the second round of voting, the Macron and the left factions decided, you know what?
We're just going to strategically vote the shit out of this shit because the Nazis are a bridge too far.
So in every election where the Macron guy came in second, we're going to vote Macron's guy.
In every election where the leftist came in second, we're going to vote the leftist.
And everyone's going to consolidate around the non-Nazi option.
And that is what happened.
And so while the papers and everything, it was like, Macron, victory!
Actually, his party lost a ton of seats.
But instead of losing those seats to the Nazis, they lost those seats to the leftists.
So now Macron's government is going to have to form a coalition government with the leftists to run things through the French Congress.
This led to all kinds of pissing and moaning from the right, because after that first round of elections, they were so sure the Nazis were gonna get in, and Cat Turd and other famous political correspondents were screaming that this shit was rigged, that the Nazis had it stolen from them, because that's the bullshit.
I'm so furious that the Nazis didn't win that I need to make a conspiracy theory about it right now.
Let's go.
I love Nazis that much.
Yup.
I think my favorite thing I saw from one person was they said they pulled out every trick in the book and it was like, yeah, voting.
They got more voters than you.
That was the big trick they pulled out.
All those fascists crying in France.
Yes.
Beautiful.
France is gone.
I saw that tweeted.
Oh, someone had a post where they were like, the number of rapes in France is going to go up like 300%.
And then one of the... I think it's Gerard Depardieu out.
Boom!
Actually, that was the reply.
The reply was, hey, why are you moving there?
And it was like... Yeah.
I think it was Portering that tweeted that too.
Yeah, that sounds great.
If anyone's served that shit, it's the fucking quartering.
Oh, God.
Yeah, so that was the shock result of Europe, where the Nazi Party was poised for victory and then had it taken away from them cruelly by voters not being morons.
Take note, America.
And then in England, Basically, for the past two years, it's been a pretty much known fact that when they called an election, that the Conservative Party was going to get their asses paddled severely.
And so for those of you who don't know how England's elections work, they have a law that Parliament can only last for five years.
At the end of five years, five years after an election, Parliament must be dissolved.
But the Prime Minister can elect to dissolve Parliament basically whenever they want.
And they had to have an election by early 2025, but Rishi Sunak, the now former Prime Minister of the UK, was like, you know what?
Fuck it.
I'm just gonna rip the Band-Aid off right now.
We're doing this.
So a couple months ago he called for an election on July 4th.
So they did it.
They had the election and the center-left party Labour in England won a massive landslide.
They were projected to win 410 seats out of the 650 in the Parliament.
And they actually, barely, they crawled over that bar slightly.
They got 412 seats.
So Keir Starmer, I probably said that name a little wrong.
Uh, is now your Prime Minister in England.
I've heard all kinds of talk about him from radical leftist who will destroy the nation to horrifyingly annoying militant centrist who isn't gonna do a fucking thing.
Uh, we'll find out which of those two things is actually true.
The other big note about this, besides the fact that the Conservative Party got absolutely dog-walked, was that Nigel Farage and the Nazis of England... Love that band.
Nigel Farage and the Nazis.
Great band.
Yes.
Yes.
That is the band.
So, uh, that band, uh, they had a, basically they had their racist party was kind of like the, uh, the Brexit party.
They were the anti, they were the get the fuck out of the EU party.
And then because Brexit's in the past and no longer has any more juice, they decided to rebrand it.
So they, they created what's called the Reform Party.
And that was pretty much the party for the Nazis who thought that the conservative party was a bunch of cooks.
It was too liberal.
So it was like, if you're a hardcore Nazi, you vote reform.
You don't vote conservative.
And When the exit poll came out, it looked like Reform was going to win 13 seats, which some people thought was going to be kind of a victory for them.
Again, it's a very small number of seats for a 650-seat parliament.
But hey, gotta start somewhere.
Baby steps.
But when the smoke cleared, it turned out that while Farage and a couple of his other big sacks of shit did actually win seats, they only won four.
So, they were protected from 13, they got four.
So, Team Nazi in England, not a relevant political force is what we've learned.
So, cheers all around to Western Europe.
Kimbobulations, you did a great job.
and all the right-wingers on Twitter.
Hopefully we will be joining you in November in defeating the uprise,
or the upswing of Nazism in your conservative parties.
We're right there with you, our brothers and sisters over in Europe.
We're trying!
Yes, exactly.
Okay, so that's all good stuff.
Illuminati in control over in Europe.
Love to see it.
Let's start talking about domestic issues.
Namely, Project 2025, which, as far as I know, is Donald Trump's plan to continue the gratification of America?
Is that what that is?
Uh, it was until people started talking about it, at which point Donald Trump did, posted a truth being like, Project 2025, I don't even know what you're talking about.
Never heard of it.
No earthly idea what you're doing.
He made that comment after the Heritage Foundation guy was like, made those comments about how we're in the, in the second American revolution.
Yes.
Heritage Foundation's heavily involved with Project 2025.
Yeah, the Impromptus 2025 is the Heritage Foundation's blueprint.
And that, yeah, that was the guy that we talked about last week who was just like, as long as the left keeps it peaceful, we won't kill them.
And then he said it again!
He said it again!
Well, yeah, but what you guys don't know is he has a compound in Appalachia, so...
That guy's horse is fuckin' impregnable, bro.
He has such an unbelievably big rock hanging from an unbelievably big tree.
It would squash it.
It's like Looney Tunes.
You see the tank go by, you drop the boom.
The tank is a pancake.
It just squished so flat from that rock.
You have no earthly idea.
It's incredible.
So, yeah, once people started actually looking into Project 2025, there were a lot of Republicans that were not happy about it.
Stephen Miller, who is also working on Project 2025 and is a racist sack of shit who literally wants to be Trump's Goebbels, In a second Trump presidency, he posted a thing where he was just like, I know that smooth-brained moron Biden's staff are trying to tie me to this shit, ba-ba-ba-ba.
And then immediately the Biden HQ social media feed was like, is this you?
And it was a video of like, of Stephen Miller being like, Proximity 25, incredible.
I love it.
It was just like, oh God.
There's a lot of videos of all the various and sundry people that Trump might pick for his vice president being like, you know what's great?
Project 2025.
I love how lying adapted to the fact that everything is like being recorded now by just turning into, you just ignore it and plow through.
Yes, no shame.
Shame is a mask.
It's like, yep, I've always, I've always hated pizza.
I've never loved pizza.
You could go to look at my background and say, I've never eaten pizza.
And they're just like, uh, we retrieved these business documents for you owning a pizzeria.
And here's a video of you eating a bunch of pizzas.
It'd just be like, you know, the media can say anything they want about, but like, the people know me and they know that I hate pizza.
Oh man, it's yeah, it's just that.
It's just like, if you're a politician in America, and especially if you're on the right, shame is something you need to not have any of.
You must be absolutely devoid of it.
You must look at someone dead in the eyes and lie your fucking ass off to them and not care.
Just absolutely don't care.
Just ruthlessness.
Yeah, so there is a handy bullet point list of Project 2025, which the biggest one is really the fact that they're going to do a thing where instead of the government being run by experts in their fields, they're just going to fire all those people and then replace them with people that will just say whatever Trump thinks is correct.
And, uh, John Oliver did a long, uh, video essay about this one last week tonight, about how dangerous and scary that shit is.
Uh, we're just gonna gut Social Security, we're gonna ruin Medicare and Medicaid, we're gonna abolish the Department of Education, which is really fucking weird and random and stupid.
We're gonna get rid of all people with, and I quote, ethnically muddied blood?
That seems aggressive.
Yes!
Yes!
Yeah, 100%.
Oh my God.
How do they defend that one?
Oh, they don't.
They just plow through.
Ignore it.
You know, I haven't actually read the full bill myself for the full list.
I'm a busy man.
There's a lot of stuff on that list, but I'm sure it's all good stuff.
Yeah, yeah.
And this is the current line of attack of Democrats, where I think there's even a video where Sleepy Joe is looking at the camera.
He says, go Google Project 2025.
So letting people know what Trump's actual plan for America is, should he become the president again.
The plan's so bad that Trump himself is trying to distance himself from it.
It's awesome.
I actually had a QAnon promoter claim that the left had created Project 2025 to smear Trump with.
Either way, it would explain the line item in there that says that fathers are not only legally allowed to, but obligated to have sex with their own daughters.
It's strange.
I was like, that is a bizarre and gross thing to put in there.
But it seems like it tracks with Donald Trump or the left wanting to smear Donald Trump.
Both equally plausible.
Exactly.
Both exactly as plausible.
I have photographic evidence of how plausible these two things are.
Here's my stack of photos of Trump being weird with his daughter and file not found for the other photo, you know?
Oh, God.
It is.
It is just so wonderful that... How did this fucking moron become such a political force in America that we've had to deal with him, like, for forever?
I mean, this is the first person in my lifetime who's going to be the nominee of a major party three times!
This is... You're supposed to go away after two terms or after you lose an election because you're a loser at that point.
You're supposed to have that loser stink on you so your party goes, Go away!
You suck!
George H.W.
Bush wasn't like, I'm coming for you, Clinton!
We're gonna have round two, you no-good so-and-so!
Somebody was posting those quotes on the debates for the Obama presidency, where he's like, get him there, all smiles, shaking his opponent's hand, they're both taking pictures for the camera, and everybody's all like, it seems like, yeah, we're on the opposite sides of the aisle and we want to run the country differently, but we're still a bunch of dudes in our 40s or early 50s just trying to make the best of it.
Just like now it's just like two bitter old men one of whom is like barely awake and the other is barely alive because he's not especially in good shape and they're just like yelling at each other's golf game on the debate floor and it's just like what is going on?
Dude, it's sort of like that movie Idiocracy.
Have you ever seen that movie?
What movie?
Oh, yeah.
Have you ever seen the movie Idiocracy?
I don't know if anyone's ever told you about this, but currently it's just like Idiocracy.
It's the same.
It's identical to that movie.
Oh, thank you.
Thank you, trenchant political analyst.
Oh, God.
I just love that.
Thank you, Twitter engagement farmer.
Certainly that's not work.
Oh, 1.2 million views.
Okay, sick.
Love.
What a platform!
Now that I'm back on Twitter, I love the amount of people who just, like, shamelessly engage with Fyre, but it'll just, like, like, you know, post a picture of a delicious cake and just be like, dude, dessert fucking sucks.
Fight me.
And it's like, 25,000 people chime in and they're just like, dude, you suck!
Dessert rules, actually!
We love it!
Am I hungry?
That was my second food metaphor.
They didn't put something in my tummy after the podcast?
That's like my favorite thing that I immediately... Now that Elon's made it harder to block people, you actually have to click through to their profile and then go through the whole process.
Which is an incredible feature.
Love a feature where it's just like, I hate this person, I never want to see what they're about on Twitter ever again.
It's like, yes, but would you like to see what their profile is like?
No!
No, I do not!
Right, exactly!
Especially if it's somebody who's just like, imagine if it was somebody you were trying to block and report because they were like sharing some sort of like dubious material and it was just like, well easy there partner, check out their profile first.
No!
No.
No.
I don't want to see, like, their wallpaper, and their AVI may be bad, but I have to see that, but their wallpaper could be terrifying.
Yeah, so I don't want to end up on whatever list that's gonna, like, just be like, ah, certainly, like, let's see who's been checking out this guy's profile.
Right, yeah.
I'm like, no, I'm the one who reported him, I promise.
So they're just like, that's what they all say.
Yeah, I don't need to go to Dr. Disrespect's fucking page or block him.
I don't want to be associated with him.
No.
No, bad.
Keep him away from me.
Jesus Christ.
Speaking of which, have you guys seen this alleged trend of people, like, doing the old Chris Hansen, like, ambush a pedophile, like, in a public place, like a Wal-Mart or whatever thing?
But then the punchline to it is that they just beat the person merciless.
Oh yeah, that's something that's been a like a QAnon thing for a little while now where it's just like this guy gets street justice for like showing up thinking he's gonna fuck a 13 year old.
I guess like maybe the algo just knows that I talk about conservative goon shit and occasionally like watching people get knocked out on TikTok because I started seeing some of that stuff on TikTok and I was just like This is, I don't know how this makes me feel.
There's like a visceral nature to just setting up, setting up a trap to beat someone.
But it's also just like, okay, well, they are, they're trying to rape a kid.
So I do kind of, like, it's just like, wow, that's a real trolley problem right there, you know?
But at the end of the day, I do watch the whole video.
So I think I might know what side I fall on.
Can you imagine being somebody like at Wal-Mart?
You're just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck is going on over here?
And they're just like, oh, that dude, like, he thought he was coming to have sex with a 13-year-old.
It's just like, oh, oh.
As you were then, I guess, you know.
See you later.
Just fucking get out of there.
There's like a video I just remembered and it's like a bunch of women are like like punching and kicking at this guy and he's not defending himself and it's being filmed from a car and the guy in the passenger seat is like hey like is he touching kids or something and like some people and like he gets car and he runs out of the car just wailing on the guy.
Yeah I think somebody in the crowd says that he like shouts that he's like a rapist or something and then you know.
Yeah, he just gets out of the car to get him a piece.
Yes, exactly!
He's like, oh shit!
I get to beat up an abuser?
Fuck yeah!
Wham!
Which is great, dude.
Imagine if that was every- Dude, I feel like we could stamp out a lot of sexual assault overnight if we just made that the policy.
Yeah!
It'd just be like, hey, if it comes out, anyone could just say it out loud.
It'd just be like, hey, guess what?
This guy.
And then everyone around is just like morally, ethically correct.
It's just fucking on-the-ground pummelings.
Just like, yeah, if you want to be that level of creep, you better be able to fight, like, ten people at once.
That would at least make them more easily identifiable in crowds.
If you're 6'8", you've got calluses all over your knuckles, you look like you've got three black belts.
Oh my god, not around my kids, you know?
What a horrible world I just invented.
Anyway, let's get away from all that.
Just kidding, because I just remembered what our last headline is.
Trump X Epstein Millennium Duel, or whatever.
Pick your fighting game subtitle here.
It's time for us to once again talk about how much Trump and Jeffrey Epstein were like BFFs who really loved hanging out together probably on that island that QAnon hates so damn much.
Obviously Trump was there as a double agent.
He was drawing maps.
He was putting bugs.
I like that movie being made of Trump just like surreptitiously putting a bug on a lamp, going over to some other room, putting some stuff down there.
Yeah, opening a door, seeing a horrible assault taking place and just not doing anything about it.
I have to complete the mission.
And then at the end of the movie, they're just like, the mission resulted in zero arrests.
It's just like, okay, cool.
Yeah, great.
Good stuff.
Yeah.
Oh, all of that, yeah.
So, recently the quote-unquote New Epstein files dropped, which is not really true at all.
This is all stuff we've already heard before.
New Epstein, who this?
Donald Trump!
No, we already knew that.
Right.
Haley, we were talking about this earlier, so... It's just like, there's a popular You know, everybody's upset because, you know, Biden did bad in the debate.
So why isn't the media covering this?
And one of those is, why aren't you covering the Uh, it was just revealed that Trump, uh, had more connections to Epstein this week, which is not true.
This is old news.
Uh, and the, the, they're, uh, they're referencing a civil, uh, suit that was from, um, hold on, let me pull this up.
Like Katie Johnson, she was a Jane Doe, um, in this original, Civil case.
Um, but yeah, uh, yeah, it's a complaint from a civil case filed by Katie Johnson.
It wasn't new evidence this week.
Um, and all of this was dismissed.
Um, so it's not ever been actually put into evidence.
Um, so the screenshot that was shared was from like an old court, an old civil lawsuit from like, Literally forever ago and there's been like, this is the, you know, it's like, Oh, why isn't this being covered in the media?
Because they covered it back in 2016 when all that information was originally out and all that filings was originally out.
And you can find articles literally on Vox.
I'm reading one right here.
The lawsuit accusing Trump of rape of raping a 13 year old girl explained sub headline.
The anonymous plaintiff dropped her lawsuit against Trump.
The circumstances around which have been bizarre.
So you can actually read all of this information already if you need to confirm in your little brain that Trump is a creep because we all been new and you guys are just doing blue and non-nonsense on the timeline and I'm tired of it.
So that's the story.
Wow.
He's connected to Epstein.
I'm shocked.
I didn't know.
The pictures, I love two.
That I keep seeing AI images of Trump and Epstein with, like, little girls.
And it's like, you don't have to do this.
There's real photos of them together.
Knock it off.
So anyway.
Right.
You don't have to fake this shit to bring it up.
And the thing about this is that for QAnon people, their reaction is, oh, this is old news, we've already debunked this, blah, blah, blah.
You really haven't debunked it.
Trump's ties to Epstein are known, and there's no quote-unquote good reason for it.
Recently, Epstein's brother came out and said that he had dirt on Hillary and Trump that would have ruined both of them.
He works with Dershowitz.
Dershowitz is still like this with the Trump team.
The man openly talked about being in his panties with teenagers.
Like, we don't have to pretend.
We don't have to make fake shit up.
It's all, there's plenty of ties.
So anyway, yeah.
This isn't, yeah, this is not, this is not a conspiracy theory.
This is not fringe.
This doesn't require making stuff up or trying to decode the secret messages.
It's like, no, this is literally a straight line.
It is just Trump, line, Epstein connection.
It's there.
It's a real thing.
All the attempts to deny that are coke.
And when you try to make it bigger and better than that, that's silly.
It's a waste of everyone's time.
There's no reason to do that.
Calm down.
The funniest thing I've seen recently was a bunch of QAnon people were very mad about this new uptick in Trump-Epstein talk.
They're like, oh, you liberals didn't care about what Epstein was doing until you could take down Trump with it.
And my reaction is, I don't like anyone who goes after kids.
I want them all in jail.
Whereas you only want the liberals who touch kids to go to jail.
You defend your guys when this shit happens.
You guys are all still big fans of Andrew Tate.
And that guy is literally incredibly credibly accused of being a sex
rap.
They're literally the same.
Jeffrey Epstein died and could be used as a political like football for
people to be like, you knew Epstein, you knew Epstein.
You're in Epstein.
And then it's like when you talk about someone like Andrew Tate, it's like, well, some of them were like 17 and it's like, not that bad.
And, you know, basically an adult and trafficking, not bad.
Um, and it's like, you really don't actually hate a lot of the shit Epstein did, a lot of these people.
It's just like, you could use it to attack your political enemies, so that's fun.
Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna lie.
I'm a little bit most of the people out there that are big time banging the drum anti-pedophile style.
In their mind, their idea of touching a kid is probably touching like a little kid.
Maybe.
But I bet most of them would love to fuck a 15 year old.
They would be first in line to do it if it was legal.
They couldn't wait to do it if it was legal.
And probably if it's illegal.
Comedy show, just jokes.
No allegations against anyone.
Don't try to sue me.
Oh, just... Republicans, comma, all.
That's right.
I'm talking to you, conservatives, comma, all.
Oh, just watch any graper or right-wing nutball get asked a question about the age of consent and watch them turn into the human pretzel as they just try to flail, incoherently screaming about how, well, look, age of consent's weird because, I mean, when does a woman know Like, what sex is, and if she wants to do it, and there have been people who are just like, give me a number of that.
Buddy, give me a number.
Yeah, it's just like, hey, how about we just make it, uh, let's just say 18, you know?
That sounds like a number that should be like, you know, federally recognized, and like, let's recognize it across the board, every state, on board for 18.
50 windmill slam dunk hands-ups?
Everybody 50?
Wait, a lot of people with their hands still down?
What's this for?
Would you like a higher age of consent?
Maybe 21?
The same age as alcohol?
Everybody raise your hands.
What?
Hands still down?
Even higher than that?
And it's just like, Tennessee, Alabama, like, look at each other.
Who wants a tail?
And we want it lower.
Like, I don't think it gets it.
And it's just like, OK, cool.
And it's like, all right, well, why?
Can somebody, anybody, good explanation for why it should be lower than 18?
That seems kind of gross.
I mean, 18 seems kind of sus to begin with.
Some of them go still in high school.
It's like, but, okay, let's, let's, anybody want to try to talk me into a good excuse why it should be lower than, like, the legal age of adulthood?
That's bizarre!
Yeah, Nick Quintles has openly talked about wanting a teenage bride, which is like, yeah, he still gets regular play in political discourse.
Um... These people are freaks, is what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Not a big fan on this podcast, I don't think.
Yeah, these are people who literally have that fucking Transformers scene where the guy has the laminated sheet of the Age of Consent at every stage.
Also, the discourse around Dr. Disrespect was like, Sneeko was- people were really twisting themselves to be like, well, how old was she?
And people like Sneeko were like, oh, so it's not okay for Dr. Disrespect to text somebody who's 17 years old, 364 days, you know, 23 hours, 59 minutes?
And it's like, yeah, correct!
days, you know, 23 hours, 59 minutes.
I was like, yeah, correct.
That's how the law works.
Like, does it seem kind of arbitrary when you get down to like that real nitty gritty
like final 30 seconds?
Yes, but also what sort of fucking creep-ass creep do you have to be to be counting them seconds and still fall on the wrong side of it?
Yeah.
And it's like, I don't think that's what happened, but I don't think it was like a later... No, that girl, like, it was one of those things where Dr. Disrespect was like, probably like, how old are you?
And she was like, 16.
And he was like, 18?
And then she was like, yeah, 18, lol.
And then they kept talking.
And it was just like, okay, well, that's acknowledgement that you knew that she said it differently.
It's like, you're a pervert and the worst.
Also, I'm not going to get too much into it, because whatever, but the sketch stuff that happened over the course of this week really called to just exactly where the audiences for these people lie.
The fact that Sketch was getting a lot more blowback from that ordeal than the Dr. Disrespect thing, where in Sketch's case, nothing illegal happened.
It was totally all above board.
It was just like, you know, a thing that didn't play to their base, but then all of a sudden it's just like, oh, he's fucking gay, fuck him.
Like, dude, I don't fuck with that.
He deceived all y'all.
Like, what a betrayer.
It's just like, you guys are just going to bad for Dr. Disrespect who got, like, he got his money fucked with by the people paying him because they caught him on their platform texting underage girls.
Like, how the fuck are you going to be that homophobic, dude?
Or that into underage girls.
Pick your poison.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, that was just, like, it's really wild to be ride or die with the pederast, and then someone else is like, yeah, yeah, I did some gay porn, I'm gay.
And you're like, boo!
Boo!
Witch!
Burn the witch!
He was so good at Madden, though!
Yeah, Jesus Christ.
But you know, these are the times in the country that we live in and we're supposed to love it and think that it's the greatest one on earth.
The Lord knows that I do as far as, you know, if Donald Trump wins the election, I've never said anything bad about America.
And if Joe Biden wins the election and Kamala Harris, I've never said anything bad about America.
Well, I mean, honestly, I kind of feel like, in a lot of ways, that this is the Vice President election.
I mean, my God.
Yeah, I mean, considering, like, Trump's, what, 78 now?
So if he won, he would be 83 leaving, and Sleepy Joe would be 86 on his way out, or 87.
Yeah, and I mean, it's like, Jesus Christ.
Harrison, the president that died like a month into office, I mean, he might look like a titan of the White House, but in comparison to Trump, Trump might get sworn in, and as soon as he takes his hand off the Bible, some people might just walk up to him and be like, sir, you've been 25th Amended, it's over.
He's like, what?
Sharks?
The sharks?
He's like, yes, yes, Mr. President, the sharks.
It was the sharks.
That'd be great.
The Katy Perry left shark is just there, like, on stage during the inauguration.
Put the fear of God in him.
Yeah, it's absolutely wild.
Maybe that's the hope we need to be clinging on to.
Donnie Trump is really dragging out his VP pick.
Maybe his VP pick is so horrible that it gets people shook again.
They're just like, okay, Sweepy is still better than actively working against us, you know?
Having a guy asleep at the wheel is still less dangerous than having somebody fucking jerking the wheel all crazy.
What's really funny is that QAnon originally was like, Michael Flynn's gonna be the vice president!
Woo!
Take America back!
Or Admiral Rogers, a few of the other people that have been in the Q drops that they love and think are their heroes.
And now that they know they're not going to get that, I've seen so many QAnon people, basically their commentary about the vice presidency is, whoever Trump picks is right.
He'll pick the right person for the job.
Don't need to worry about it.
And then other people are like, but who do you want him to pick?
And they're like, not my question.
We follow Trump.
Whatever he says we do.
And it's just like, Who do you want?
You have to have an opinion.
Noah, don't.
Look, interviewer, how much more clear do I need to make it for you?
I am licking his boots.
Dude, what he says goes.
I'm lined up for his dictatorship.
How much more do you need me to say?
Stop asking me.
What daddy Trumpy wanty?
Me wanty too.
Like, stop wasting everybody's time with these fucking questions.
Like, once they're just, like, the sycophant answer, just, like, treat it like an RPG and walk away.
That NPC doesn't have anything else to say to you.
Okay, yeah, fuck this guy.
This guy over here has an exclamation point over his head.
I'm gonna go talk to him.
Does anybody have anything to say that's not just whatever?
I like whatever Trump likes!
Like, all the people with that opinion can go.
Like, you're free to go.
You don't have shit to say.
I can just get, like, I can get that info off of True Social.
Fuck off.
Yes.
Okay.
Speaking of fucking off, it's time to make our news segment fuck off so we can make our mailbag segment fuck on.
Mad on.
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Our listeners got questions, we got answers. It's time for Q&A.
Cleodora Silvestri, the Hellworld Grand Inquisitor says it's been over a week with no news of the inexplicably absent
Donald Trump.
How wonderful is it to return to a Trump-free life once again?
It was glorious for those 10 days where he just dipped out and decided to just go golfing and not actually run for president or anything.
Yeah, to take a break from all the hard work he was doing?
Yes!
He did that debate with Sleepy Joe, and he was just so plump and tuckered out afterwards, he needed a week and a half to recharge.
I mean, to be fair, he probably was getting pretty used to just sitting around in a courtroom, like, being cold.
Yes!
Being cold, falling asleep.
Like, yeah, it was just great.
Yeah.
I mean, if we were dealing with a regular, slightly coherent campaign where it wasn't just the press telling us that our current president is about to die or has crippling dementia slash Parkinson's, some people would probably be asking some questions about the brilliance of the Trump campaign.
He was, quote unquote, campaigning in the Bronx, which he's not winning New York.
After an 11-day absence from the trail, he campaigned in Florida last night, which again, it's his home state.
He won it pretty comfortably in 2020 and 2016, probably not losing Florida.
When is Donnie going to actually venture out to the land of Wisconsin or Pennsylvania or Arizona, the states that he actually has to win and shit?
What'd you say?
He was just here.
I went to him.
He was just there?
Oh yeah, but that was, I mean, but by just here, that was like a month ago.
I mean, that was a while ago.
Yeah, so I'm just saying that, like, the whole, the whole argument the Trump campaign has been making is that Sleepy Joe can't handle the rigors of the campaign, whereas our young, sprightly demigod of a candidate is just gonna crisscross America and give blistering stump speeches and Instead, he literally went like basically two weeks without a campaign stop.
And then his campaign stop was probably a couple hours out of Mar-a-Lago.
He's like, yeah, drive me down to the place near my home so I can yell at people for a little while and then go back home and be sleepy sleeps.
So yeah, I appreciate that.
Please continue not campaigning.
Just let's do this.
Let's just have neither one of these guys on the trail and just have the election be vibes.
Just all vibes.
Actually, no, because I want Trump to talk.
Because every time he talks, he just tells us how incoherent he is.
The RNC is going to be great because he always gives like a 90 minute speech because he's like, this is the one time I got America trapped.
They have to listen to me.
Listeners, I'm so goddamn serious.
Somebody get me to the RNC.
It's next week.
I would love to go.
I would love to go.
So someone, if you could get me there?
You want to hear Amber Rose and Nikki Haley talk?
I'm half right.
Amber Rose allowed.
Nikki Haley disallowed.
We didn't talk about that.
She will be speaking and is in the Magosphere now because she's trying to be relevant again.
Which is like, I mean, which is crazy.
I mean, certainly, like, she's still like a semi-famous model, right?
I mean, certainly there's a better path for relevance.
Like, just, like, marry an athlete or something.
I don't know.
Like, she got famous being, like, like, fucking Kanye West's girlfriend or whatever.
Just, like, do that again.
Or hanging out with Forjati Oblo, it's like, oh man, that's really, that's- That's an insane downgrade from Kanye West's Forjati Oblo.
Like, simply, simply making that move tells me all I need to know about your career.
And, like, it honestly makes me think I have a shot.
Like, should I be shooting my shot with Amber Rose?
Because apparently she has fallen from fucking grace, dude.
Just put a MAGA hat on and pretend you're some type of MAGA personality and she'll be like, okay.
You know?
Does she not already have an OnlyFans?
She seems like the perfect candidate for an OnlyFans.
She's famous enough to do really well on it.
I'm sure a bunch of people think she's attractive, she'd break into cash, and they'd be happy to give her all the attention in the world.
She can do that thing where she's just like, DM me for 25 bucks.
I mean, she's famous enough to even do, like, lewds, not nudes.
I mean, she'd be like, boom, bikini shots!
She seems like the type who would also do nudes, I'm not gonna lie.
I'm just saying.
She seems like she would be down for nudes.
She seems pretty confident in the way that she looks.
You know, maybe it was a sign when she kind of shamed Kanye, not to be a Kanye defender on the timeline, but when she kind of shamed Kanye for having fingers in the booty ass bitch.
You remember that?
Remember that line she did?
Does anyone remember this?
Fingers in the booty ass bitch?
I don't.
I do not.
But I mean, you know.
Never mind.
It is pretty funny because it's Kanye and like he seems like that's exactly the sort of thing that he would like use an F-slur about in one of his rap songs.
But at the same time, it's just like, it's not for me, but I've heard a lot of people like Little Finger in the booty, you know?
But Kanye West is a piece of shit, so I'm happy to call him Little Finger in the booty ass bitch.
Shocker discourse on Hellworld.
Yeah, this is after Dark Territory.
But yeah, this was a magical time where we had no Trump on our TVs, no photos of Trump on our TVs, none of that.
It was great.
But those times are over.
Those times are over, unfortunately, yes.
MeBad asks, best favorite Blue Anon conspiracy theories of the presidential campaign so far?
Uh, that CNN fucked with Biden's microphone to make him sound horrible.
I love that one.
That's so great.
Just fucking... Dude, like... Blame the campaign for not getting out in front of it and saying that the dude had a cold going in.
Like, the fact that like a half hour into the fucking debate, they were like, Biden spokespeople say that Biden has cold.
It's like, well, great!
Fucking great, morons!
You gotta let us know about that ahead of time.
They keep baking his audio.
Like, they baked the other interview he did with George Stepanopoulos.
They're like, they're fucking with the audio again!
And it's like, no.
No.
How is it possible that, like, one of the people on Biden's team getting paid that somebody didn't think of that he had a cold lie ahead of schedule?
Like, the people close to him have to know that he has a window.
And that, like, they're just like, oh, the debate is happening outside of that window.
How should we handle this situation?
And I guess that situation was...
Kanye West fingers fully up our butts for a little while.
Bazinga.
Let's just keep the thumb up the bum until it's like 20 minutes before the debate.
And be like, oh crap, we forgot to do our homework!
He's got a cold!
He's an old man with a cold, and so if his debate is because of that cold, baby, it's like...
Yeah, dude, like, obviously that wasn't a cult.
Like, I mean, the American people, some of us, some of us could look at a thing and pay attention to it, you know?
Yeah, people I think are kind of offended by that excuse, like, like, like, just, just like, yeah, some people don't believe that shit.
A lot of people do not want Biden.
I think this is what a lot of people don't understand is like, again, I talked to Normies and- None of us ever wanted Biden.
No.
Biden is the white shadow projected by Donald Trump.
It's hard to explain to people.
It's like, you know, wonks, political wonks, people that are really in the political sphere, you don't have to convince them to vote.
It's the normies and the mainstream fucking just people, the general population that you have to convince to vote for this guy.
And if some of them Are not satisfied with what they think Biden is, then they're not going to vote for him because they're not ideologically Democrat.
In Arizona, the largest block is independents.
Uh, and yeah, a lot of them aren't like, I love the Democrat party.
I, you know, always vote with the Democrat party.
You got to actually convince a pretty big chunk of them, which is why shitheads like Ruben Gallego abandoned progressive politics as soon as they run, you know, for Congress.
So yeah, it's just like, I don't want Trump to win.
I'm just worried that your general average Joe voter is not gonna either turn out or
care to vote for Biden.
And if you're one of these liberals, or I guess anybody who's just like,
oh, you should just be voting.
You should be voting because you believe somebody should win, not because you want the other guy to lose.
It's just like, don't fucking blame me.
I didn't make the stakes this high.
I didn't get Donald Trump into the position he's in.
That's not my fucking fault.
I didn't make Republicans like active antagonists to the peace of the world.
I didn't make them racist, homophobic, transphobic Nazis.
That shit is not on me.
If the opposition wasn't so inherently evil, corrupt, and irredeemable, I would be happy to maybe vote my conscience.
But the stakes are too high.
I know people whose identity and livelihood and very lives are threatened by Republicans getting in power.
And like, so no, I can't, my conscience is, stands with people who need not Republicans to exist in a comfortable fashion.
That's where my fucking conscience lies.
Right.
Like to me, it's just, this isn't like, this isn't being fanatically pro-Biden.
This is being anti-Trump.
And the only way you can stop Trump is to vote for Biden.
The one thing that drives me up a wall with people is when they talk about, oh, I can't vote for either of them because they're so bad.
And like, blah, blah, blah.
The morality of not voting does not change the fact that there will be a fucking president.
We will have a president at the end of this whole thing.
And you can't say, oh, there's no blood on my hands because I didn't vote.
No, no, there is.
You don't escape the system by not participating.
The system functions just fine without your vote.
So either you accept that one of these two options is objectively unbelievably fucking bad and is going to do an incredible amount of damage to this country, and the other one has kept the ship pretty much going the way it's been going for the last four years, and guess what?
We haven't outlawed gay people.
We haven't decided to deport 15 million people, which is something that like the other guys, but literally promising every time he does a stump speech, it's the one talking point he gets out before he gets distracted by sharks and beautiful women that make him remind him that Chris Christie was fat.
I mean, it's just like, there's a, this guy wants to fuck shit up is what it comes down to.
That's like the end of the day.
Also, I'm not telling people that dislike Biden.
To let go of that energy.
Just bottle it up until after we get him over the gold light for the election.
And then we have four years for you guys to pressure the fucking DNC into putting up candidates that are not piles of bones.
And that maybe have the progressive politics that a lot of us want to start popping, you know?
Like, we would have four years of relative safety for you to fucking get in there and just like grab people by their collars and just be like, MAKE UP YOUNG!
MAKE UP YOUNG AND THEY WANT RIGHTS FOR PEOPLE!
I will gladly vote for AOC in 2028.
I'll vote for the most progressive candidate you possibly can find me in the primary.
I'll campaign for them.
I'll do all the work in the world.
I am a left of Lenin lunatic.
I just happen to also be very pragmatic about the fact that I'm not going to let the bad guys win.
I don't believe in after Hitler us.
That's just not how this works.
You just have to convince the general person.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Which is why we need Donald Trump to keep talking, unfortunately.
Yes.
Yes.
In Arizona, there was a interesting, there was a conspiracy about the presidential election because in Arizona, there were more people who voted down ballot than voted for the presidential election because Thousands of Arizonans chose to forego the actual presidential part of the ballot.
Because it was rigged!
Yes.
So rigged.
Because it was rigged.
Which reminds me, why are we not out there reminding our conservative friends that the election is rigged and that they shouldn't bother?
It was so effective last time!
Yes!
So yeah, I just think like, uh, you know, there is like just, there is a pretty good sizable chunk, especially in states like Arizona, which is now unfortunately a swing state that just kind of, they, they have, they have, they don't have the general politics of incredibly MAGA or incredibly, you know, lib, and I don't think they kind of, I don't just think they... I think that some of them would vote for Trump, you know?
I do enjoy that Haley, just exposing her inner MAGA, her inner right-wing lunatic, tears streaming down her cheeks as she said, Arizona's now a swing state!
Because it was blood red, like, less than ten years ago.
It was a nightmare.
Yeah, this isn't, say, a bad thing.
No, she's mad.
She wants to go back to those days.
That's why she was upset about Arizona being a swing state.
Yeah, and, you know, like...
Small silver lining and grim silver lining, so take this with a grain of gallosumer salt the way it's intended.
But, you know, the climate change that totally doesn't exist, ravaging California, is going to make a lot of the states that border like California or are close to the California border start to get bluer.
Bluer by the year, I would imagine, as people have to leave California because climate change, which again is fake and does not exist, uh is uh burning and or earthquaking and or tsunami whatever hey whatever you got you know aside from a blizzard even though it did last year didn't they get like a weird freak snowstorm out there too like this past winter as well california what a state
I'm laughing mostly because I'm just imagining the Mormons of Utah being like, No!
The liberals are coming!
And we get Blue Utah.
They're like, No!
Our Mormons are- BlueTah, dude.
Yes!
BlueTah, I'm here for it.
Oh, God.
Maybe that's the Hellworld merch.
It's us stepping to try to get Blue Utah.
That's what we need.
Yes!
That's what it's all about.
Oh, we're doing this.
We need their outsized voting power.
Or we at the very least need to dilute their outsized voting power by at least putting enough people in the state where it makes sense that they get whatever votes they get.
Chris Brandenburg asks, name your favorite QAnon Drake.
Meets one of the following criterias.
A non-culture vulture, ghostwritten baker, freaky ass conspiracy theorist.
God, I'm not plugged in enough to know which of them are, like, posers that make it.
This is mostly a Mike and Hayley question.
Because that is exactly Drake's niche.
Like, I remember, don't get me wrong, Drake has put out songs that I have thought were catchy and that I enjoyed, although typically I tend to enjoy, like, remixes or whatever.
At the same time, like, I was pretty confused when Drake started getting popular.
Because I looked at him and I was just like, this dude is, like, really kind of soft and corny.
Like, why are people treating him like a rap star?
And then people just kept doing that for a decade.
And, you know, I got successfully gaslit.
I was like, maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe he's not corny.
Maybe he's actually mad hard and everybody loves him because of how hard he is.
And then it turns out that just somebody with credibility, in this case Kendrick Lamar, came out and was just like, nah, he's actually corny and whack.
And I was like, I knew it!
I knew it the whole time!
You guys, what?
Why has he been famous for so long?
Anyway.
So yeah, this is really a question for Mike and Hayley.
Who's the QAnon poser, Mike?
Who just does QAnon for the money?
Uh, I think that like Jordan Sanders is really good.
Yeah, Sather's, like, so perfect for this spot.
Brian Cates, the Epoch Times guy, I mean, he was anti-QAnon for a long time before, like, he lost his job at the Epoch Times and is now just, like, trying to build his brand, so, like, he's now big time.
Like, the Q drops, they foretell the prophecy!
Are there any former child stars who are now QAnon people?
Not that I can think of off the top of my head.
I mean, most of the people that are, like, on that level of PILD, they're just kind of shitty.
And I don't know that they're full QAnon.
Like, Roseanne Barr, I don't think is QAnon.
Rob Schneider, he's not QAnon.
But they're just all, like, crazy.
How about Busey?
Is he crazy?
The elder Busey seems like the sort of guy who might actually be QAnon.
Oh god, that'd be great.
He just seems like he'd believe any old conspiracy thing at this point.
He's like, the lizard people are putting soap in the worms!
And you're like, that doesn't even make sense!
I hate it when the lizard people put soap in the worms.
Oh man, Randy Quaid is another one who's completely out of his fucking mind.
Randy Quaid was my hero because he made a post where he was just like, Like Obama put Assange in jail and Trump's like freed him
and then people were like no like Trump was the DOJ that indicted him and then Biden's
DOJ freed Assange.
Like none of your timeline works out.
Which QAnon promoter has touched a minor?
Uh oh god uh it's like that yeah look um Oh, it's all of them.
You know, there's a guy like Godlinsky is his name or something like that.
And like that guy actually was like a big time QAnon promoter.
And then it came out that he was, like, arrested for being a pederast.
And it was a huge ordeal.
And he's still going, I think.
I think that guy's, like, still, like, working and trying to hustle in the QAnon community.
And it's just... I thought you people hated pedos more than anything.
How can you still have, like, a convicted pederast in your community and not immediately excommunicate him?
How is this even possible?
This is insanity.
It's not even wrong.
Especially because they love sharing that like the meme of like the these pills cure pedophiles and it's like bullets right so yeah so you guys are you guys make it pretty clear what you think should be done to these people that yeah we keep rustling them out of your communities on the daily right yeah you're the people that are wearing the kill your local pedophile shirts and uh Uh, don't see it.
Don't see you doing that.
This has been rough.
We've been talking about the P word a lot.
Hate that.
Hate that.
Hate QAnon.
Megan and Steph talk about that.
Hate all these celebrities getting benched for that.
Sucks.
Yes.
Okay, so final question is Pancake Peasant asks, do you think Kamala Harris has a plan of action to hit the ground running when Joe Biden passes?
Parentheses.
Peacefully.
Of natural causes.
This is a comedy podcast, FBI.
So, yes.
Uh, yeah.
I mean, as the person who works the closest with him, I mean, if she doesn't have a plan in mind for what to do if health takes him out of office, then she should be removed from the position immediately.
That has to be her primary function right now, right?
Being geared up for when he can't do it anymore.
Especially because now the American public doesn't even think he can do it anymore now.
A lot of people wanted her to step up now.
The Democrats have put somebody in now, but it's obviously going to be her.
I don't think there'll be a big, big drama, but I think there will be some delegates that try to push Kamala at the upcoming DNC.
That will be interesting.
I mean, it's really weird because on the one hand, it feels like the momentum for Biden to step down is ebbed.
Yeah.
But at the same time, like literally every day, some new lunatic comes running out of the woodwork.
Like, two-term house representative from bumfuck California says Biden must go.
Did you see who it was today?
I don't know how breaking this news is, but today it was George Clooney.
Yeah, that's what it said.
George Clooney wrote an op-ed in the New York Times or whatever that was just like, hey, Joe Biden, you need to fucking not run for president, dude.
Like, I just fundraised $30 million for you, and I'm telling you to fucking step down.
Yeah, I just saw a tweet where someone was like... Which is really funny, because, sorry, the last thing I saw before that was AOC being like, yeah, we're rallying behind the president, essentially.
She was just like, we're squashing this because it's a distraction.
And then George Clooney's just like, no, no, no, no, no!
Distraction, continue!
Distraction, away!
It's like, ah, fuck you, Clooney!
Stay out of it!
Someone said, as a Biden fan, but as an even bigger Ticket to Paradise fan, today is a rough one.
But yeah, so, I mean, God, I hope that she has a fucking tremendous binder just full of, like, I don't even care if it looks like a Lisa Frank monstrosity as long as the text on it is, plan for when Joe Biden dies of old age.
Oh yeah, I mean, like, that's the thing, is that, like, You're the vice president.
Your only job is to be ready when you get the phone call.
I saw like a bunch of stories about when Trump had COVID and was in the hospital and he was like literally fucking dying.
But apparently the Trump people never told the Pence people that, yo, Your boy might be in office in a couple hours.
It ain't looking too good for Dottie Two Scoops.
And it was just like, holy shit, can you imagine just like not being given that heads up?
Like, fuck, man.
Also, I'd be fucking, I would think it would be crazy right now if she didn't have like, you know, speech writers working.
Like, I'm assuming that she's working on stuff right now just in case she is called to have to step up immediately and make like a big statement and Right, right.
Exactly.
I mean, that's just the way it has to be.
beyond just like a what if. I think that following the big scuttlebutt, like after the debate,
I bet that it was a little all hands on deck to just be like, just in case.
Right, right, exactly. I mean, that's just the way it has to be. And I mean, again, I
just feel that these Trump rallies that get no media attention is mostly because the media
is just like, well, Biden's basically senile also.
And if you just put Harris in the spot, then we, the Democrats, can say, hey, our old senile guy realized that he's passed his prime and he dipped out.
Now the Republicans need to do the same thing.
Now your old, senile guy needs to tip out, too.
To which Donald Trump would reply, SHARKS!
So I mean, like, it's just... That, to me, is... I just think that's very... I... God, I... I'm not dropping out, I'm as sharp as a whip.
Speaking of which, between a whip and a shark, I would take a whip any day.
God, it's always about sharks with this fucking guy.
Like, what are you gonna do?
Yeah, exactly.
Oh, they're trying to pass some legislation.
It's not cool that they call it the Shark, the Anti-Shark Act.
Immediately, he's in favor of it.
He just loves it.
It's the best legislation ever.
They're just like, wow, Donald Trump signed the most aggressive, like, fucking abortion protections ever conceived into law.
Like, that's incredible.
Like, how did it get done?
They're just like, we called it the Shark Week Act, and they were just like, oh, shit.
Oh, that'd be great.
Or it's just like, I bet Democrats could push through anything they wanted right now if also at the present they were just like, add $500 million for what's listed here as an item for shark eradication.
Eh?
What's this about killing sharks?
I don't know.
That sounds pretty good to me.
Yeah.
So, as the question at the end is always, what are you guys looking forward to?
Dude, it's going to be a simple pleasure for me today.
I have a small bottle of Calpico strawberry in my mini fridge that as soon as I'm done with the pod, I'm going to enjoy while mulling over my rest of the afternoon options.
Because I do think I'm a little hungry, but not hungry enough for food.
Hungry enough for a delicious Japanese, like, milk slash yogurt beverage.
Sounds just good.
Love it.
Love Calpico.
I've never heard of that.
I'm going to have to try it.
Most Asian grocers, you just have to go to the, like, it doesn't look like a traditional, you know, it's obviously creamy.
It's obviously got like a creaminess to it that is off-putting to the typical Western eye, but it's actually quite delicious.
I discovered it at the old sushi restaurant I used to frequent at the dorky hobby shop I used to play at many, many moons ago.
Anyway, hey, what's up with you?
Um, I'm just looking forward to this weather cooling down, which it won't for like a while, but I'm looking forward to it.
You know?
Maybe looking forward to the fall.
Yeah.
We'll return to a more manageable 90 degrees and she'll be like, ah, so chilly.
Oh yeah, literally.
Ugh, Arizona sounds so horrible.
I mean, temperature-wise at the very least.
Yeah.
I think that I'm mostly just going to do what I always do, is at some point, either today or tomorrow, wander off to the Sale of Willows, get myself some shrimp, try to fight off some seagulls, live that life.
Oh yeah, there's the soccer thing, the Euro 2020.
It's mostly interesting because there's literally a kid on the Spanish national team who scored a goal.
He's playing on the national team.
He's 16 years old.
That is insane to be so good at a sport that you're 16 and you're just world class.
A friend of ours shared that in our group chat earlier.
I didn't actually watch the clip yet, but I saw that he posted it.
You reminded me of it, because I read, like, in the accompanying post, I just remember him saying, this 16-year-old kid, something, something, insane goal.
I was like, okay.
Yeah, like, literally, like, from outside the box, he hits this ball, and it curves, and it just absolutely, just kisses off the upright and goes in the net.
It's like a perfect strike.
And then it's like, oh yeah, by the way, the guy who did that is 16.
And it's just, Imagine being 16, obviously that kid probably knew he had the juice when he was like 11 or 12.
Imagine at whatever point it clicked in his mind that he was just like, oh nice, I'm good enough at soccer that I'm never going to be poor.
I'm only going to be poor for the first 14 years of my life and that's so good.
I'm never going to be poor again, that's so awesome.
Yeah, I'm just an athlete of such unbelievable talent that I'm just going to have infinite wealth.
I am just literally a god of the world.
Rock on, I'm going to have to watch that clip.
Alright, that's going to do it for the show for this week.
I ran a little bit long, so let's speed run the end here.
Thank you for listening.
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Thanks to the following people for the show!
DJ Milimo Effort for the use of the original theme song, remixed by Mike Raines accidentally.
Frosty, who does our voiceover stuff, voice a cue in all of our bumps, etc.
You can find Frosty on BlueSky at FrostyVO.
You can find the show, The Adventures of Hellworld, on Twitter at Hellworld with a Q instead of an O. I am on Twitter, posting nonsense, ignore me, at HellworldFatty, spelled the same way as the show, with a Q instead of an O.
Haley on various social media at Arizona Right Watch, or AZRW, and Mike Rains on various social media at Poker Politics.
So, for another successful episode of the Avengers of the Hell World podcast, I have been one of your hosts, The Mysterious L, joined as always by Haley, also known as Arizona Right Watch, and Mike Rains, once again, also known as Poker and Politics.
Good speed, Patriots!
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