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June 20, 2024 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:34:32
Adventures In HellwQrld Episode #194: AFPAC fails with Amanda Moore

This week we has Amanda join Mike, L, and Haley to talk about how the Groyers had their lNazicon ruined. We also checked in with JT getting a DUI and what it meant to the Illuminati. Biden's getting pulled by the Dems while Trump's brain is getting melted and he's back on a shark kick. Also Russia and North Korea are now bros so America is in tons of trouble (Note: In no trouble at all). Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Time Text
the next session. Thank you.
Content Warning.
The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
Hello, everybody.
I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week, I'm joined, as always, by Haley, a.k.a.
Arizona Right Watch.
What up, everybody?
Hello.
Good afternoon.
Good morning.
Whatever time zone you're listening in.
Yeah.
We are also joined by special guest Amanda, a.k.a.
Frank the Turtle.
Hello.
She made it.
She's here.
And of course, it's in his contract he has to go last, the mysterious El.
Buenos dias, y'all!
Como estas, my beautiful babies?
What is that?
That's some Southerner who knows Spanish but doesn't do the accent.
Either because they refuse to or because they think it makes them sound racist.
Oh, that's good.
Which is one of my favorite linguistic debates.
It's just like, does putting the stank on it to make it sound the way it's supposed to make you sound more or less racist?
I've watched a bunch of videos on this topic.
It's pretty interesting to me and only me!
Hey everybody!
It never crossed my mind that it would be like Perceived as more racist, to speak correctly.
Like, I was in Panama with this girl who was, like, trying to order a hamburger at a McDonald's.
And it was so, uh, she just kept yelling, you know, hamburger-o, louder and louder.
And I wanted to kill myself.
And, like, I feel like that is bad.
But if she just properly, you know, also just said hamburger, even.
Really, anything.
I don't know.
That's fascinating.
I never thought about that.
Yeah, so I'm on your side.
I think that going the extra mile and trying to make yourself sound as authentic to what you're trying to say as possible is probably the way to go, because I don't think it's appropriation.
Presumably, they will understand that you're just trying to get as close to their native tongue as possible in this hypothetical situation, but some people follow the other side.
They think that having a white person just all of a sudden going to their You know, I'm going to roll my R's in San Suave, like, on only these words, because they cover your culture.
Like, you know, some people are just like, dude, you're putting, like, a black scent on that or whatever.
As the resident podcast Latina, I will say that you can be white and Latino.
So racist is an interesting term for it, because you can be many races and Latino.
Not a racist.
I was just at a Fuentes Hitler rally.
Let's just start throwing around the like any sort of fucking any sort of yellow card or red card of people using
the term racism Wrong, that's gonna I mean we will fight every we'll have
to fight everyone including me and Mike and everybody will fight
Quintas Hitler rally so Promises Latinos
There are white Latinos.
There are black Latinos.
There are indigenous and mixed Latinos.
It is a diverse... Did you know that there are African-Americans in Africa who have never been to America?
So weird.
I love it when people make that mistake.
They're trying to be so PC that they call Africans African-Americans.
It's like, ooh, that's a bridge too far.
So anyway, hello.
Comedy Podcast, everybody.
What's up?
This part has certainly been, like, I'm not sure if funny is the right word for it, but certainly more funny than the typical rough nature of the stuff we have to talk about.
Presumably a Nazi rally, considering our special guest is here.
Oh, it's gonna be real funny stuff with me, don't worry.
We're gonna have a great time.
I mean, I do love taking verbal swings at Nazis, because thankfully I don't live around any physical ones for me to actually take swings at.
Well, OK, I do, but I don't know who they are.
I don't know who they are.
The last time I found out who one was, I was surrounded by 40 or 50 people and I was like astonished.
I was flabbergasted.
I was like, my God, in real life, an actual person like this in my neighborhood?
Yeah, we had an issue at my workplace where some guy, we kicked him out and he proceeded to go on the Internet and complain about how his First Amendment rights were being violated.
Which, again, is not how the Constitution works in any way, shape, or form.
And then, like a week later, a guy walked in wearing a white Pride Worldwide shirt.
And we were wondering if that guy had been put up to it by the other guy, and this was an effort to try to get him thrown out so that then they could claim free speech issues.
It was very bizarre.
I was aggressively uncomfortable and went to management about it, and management was double freaked out because they just didn't know what was happening.
And I was like, you need to understand what this guy's doing.
This is unacceptable.
Well, I mean, your casino is federally funded.
Right, exactly.
And because it's federally funded, they should be allowed to say that crazy stuff in their mic.
How dare you impute upon their First Amendment rights?
Yes.
Well, you know, we are in D.C.
You actually can't discriminate against somebody for their political views.
We're like the only place where it actually is protected, like as like hate crime status or whatever, which is a real fucking bummer for us.
But everyone else, I think in the country, right?
You can't just be like, screw you.
You got to go.
I'm not actually sure what the like you know generally I would just be like I mean you know like if you're being a dickhead I'm inclined to just throw you out and then have it get settled afterwards but that's only if you're being like a Nazi or some shit so like I haven't had any trouble with it in the past.
Yeah, I love being like the big burly guy that they would call out to kick customers out when I was working retail or fast food or whatever and people were acting the fool and I'd have like a small like female manager these people think they could talk to however they want.
She'd just be like, oh bet.
She'd just go get me and a bunch of the other lads to come out.
She'd be like, oh, excuse me, what were you saying to our manager exactly?
Yeah, they would leave.
I had the reverse of that happen to me.
I had this customer that was drunk and belligerent, and I got on the phone, I'm like, yo, security, I need you to throw somebody out.
And this, like, 5 foot tall, 80 pound woman walked in as a security guard, and was like, I'm here for the chip transfer, and I'm like, this is not a chip transfer.
I need you to throw that guy out.
And then she looked at the guy, and she was like, I can't do that.
See, I'm not gonna lie, that's a pretty strong psychological play.
If I'm the guy whiling out and I hear somebody call for security and the person that shows up is like...
Comically not what I would expect a security guard to look like.
I would expect that they have like crazy CQC trading or just like a really big gun or something.
I would be terrified.
Like I'd be way more scared if it was just some like averagely sized guy about what I expected for a security guard.
Like if you if you're sitting like an 80 like an 80 pound person it'd be like what the like what are they capable of?
Yeah, she's actually just going to use, like, the force on you, just strangling you.
No, no!
Maybe I've just been brainwashed by John Wick, and I'm just afraid of everybody.
Anybody can be that guy, you know?
Like, Keanu Reeves doesn't look like he's John Wick, and yet he is!
Yeah.
Which is funny, because now there's, like, a wave of, like, vanity projects of, like, these random people doing their take on John Wick.
Like that Nobody movie with, what was it, Bob Odenkirk?
Yeah, Bob Odenkirk was John Wick.
Yeah.
Pretty great.
You know, good for them.
Let's see it, you know?
I want to see all these dumb idiots, like, take their crack at it.
John Mulaney is violent.
After the recording this season of the 1% crowd, like, Patton Oswalt's going to become John Wick.
It's going to be great.
Just like chunky John Wick.
Yeah, that'd be great because it's funny because he really doesn't look like it because he's overweight.
It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
I was gonna say Patton Oswalt, like physically, like 10 years it seems like.
He could have done the Ethan Supley and just dropped all the weight
and looked like a completely different person.
I would never know.
No, he is what he is.
That man will never change.
Nice.
Well, okay, we've got a guest.
So enough of this vamping horse shit.
Let's get into our actual stuff to talk about.
Okie dokie, let's go to the amuse-bouche.
It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
Get ready for the amuse-bouche.
Okay, so we're leading bouche-wise with our buddy Justin Turberlake,
who's bringing Moloch back.
Yep!
Those motherfuckers don't know how to act!
Yeah, so for those of you who don't know, our boy Justin Timberlake got popped while driving under the influence just by only having one martini, or whatever he claimed.
I mean, he claimed some more shit.
You can just look at the mugshot and tell that he was way more than one martini deep or whatever.
But he was just like, oh yeah, I had one big drink, I'm so sorry.
I saw online there was a list of stuff floating around that was in his system, but it's the internet, so I don't know how credible that is.
Mike, how credible is that list of stuff?
Not credible at all.
From the actual reports, Timberlake refused to be tested.
He basically was just like, no, I'm not giving you the blood or the breathalyzer or any of that stuff.
Like, the stuff that they were claiming he had in him, they basically said everything, as Elle said.
Like, there was one report that he had, like, Molly and all these other drugs in him, and then people went, like, even harder on him.
They started hitting him with stuff about like how he was using muscle relaxants that
are used so that gays can have the butt sex easier.
Yeah, like they were doing, they were doing, they were doing everything.
They were hitting JT with all, with all the negativity, all the, all the slime they could
throw at him.
And that, and then this led to the whole thing about like JT's associated with Diddy and
Diddy's now bad and everyone's going that way.
So it's like, is this like a warning shot at the bow of Diddy that we're taking your whole empire down and JT's gonna spill the beans on what you're doing to all those kids on Epstein Island and blah blah blah?
It can never just be... Wasn't that the shot over his bow?
His simultaneous double property raid?
And locking up a bunch of his kids?
I think that was the shot across the bow.
Now they're really sending the message.
They're just like, Diddy'll get it.
We're gonna get Justin Timberlake and then Diddy'll understand.
His days are numbered.
Right.
This is how conspiracy theorists work.
The number of shots across the bow is infinite.
You never stop warning the bad guy about what's about to happen to him.
But yeah, all the Hollywood Illuminati folks are claiming that Timberlake's DUI is but the first domino to fall in a chain that will topple the whole satanic pedophile ring that is Hollywood.
Liz Crokin is not endorsing Nazis for the moment because now she can go back to her Hollywood Pizzagate bullshit and scream and yell about this.
Everyone's very happy about it.
And all the people that support Janet Jackson and Britney Spears, they're attacking Timberlake from the other side because they're like, fuck that guy, let's give him the old razzle dazzle.
So it's really funny.
This is the clasping arms Rocky meme of QAnon and normal people crushing Justin Timberlake.
I sure hope not, because I really fuck with the Janet Jackson crowd on their position on the matter, and I'm just like, yeah, fuck you for being part of that and not speaking out more.
But I have never, never really cared about Britney Spears.
It doesn't suck that he cheated on her, sure, but like, meh.
Like, I don't know.
Like, that's never been, I mean, I'm sure that he would refute a lot of those claims, so I just don't care about Britney Spears enough.
But boo!
Janet Jackson is enough!
Kill him!
Hang him high!
Yes!
Um, I'm unfortunately on threads and for some reason every news outlet felt like this was the breaking news to send me.
was Justin Timberlake got arrested and there's like a weird celebrity stan culture that is just on threads that I is I don't know it's like not politically heavy it's not anything heavy I feel like everything it tries to feed me is celebrity shit so I was getting like recommended that Justin Timberlake thing a lot on threads and I saw some people in gauging in like clone discourse Of course they did.
Okay, now we're talking.
I'm back in.
Yeah, that's a really cool place.
Amanda, you should know how cool it is.
It's a different type of brain rot.
Gas leak website.
It's terrible.
Gas leak.
Everyone's got a gas leak.
So, this is not a bit.
I just do actually want to confirm.
Threads is the Facebook Twitter?
Is that what that is?
Yeah.
Yes.
Okay.
There's so many of these things, and I don't even use Instagram.
They're so much different than Twitter, but it's equally awful in a different way.
Um, that's all I have to say about threads, so yeah.
All posts the same thing on threads and Twitter, and the replies on threads are, like, absolutely deranged.
Like, I am like, are you a bot?
Like, you can't be real.
This can't be a real human.
Somebody got mad at me because I paywalled a personal essay about my stalker who wants to rape and kill me, who followed me across the country.
They were like, thanks a lot.
It's not a news story.
You know, it's about my stalker.
On Twitter, people were very supportive.
On threads, they were like, why would you paywall this?
I don't know.
It's not news I want to get out there.
If you just want to know some stuff about me, throw me a few bucks.
You can help me out.
I want to be super parasocial with you, but I don't want to give you $6.
$6. So weird. Yeah. And of course, Adrenochrome was brought up as one of the things that Timberlake may have been like,
Dude, he was just flying around on the chrome.
Happens to the best of us.
Yeah.
Fucking, man, that guy's been having a bad year, and I can't say that I care much.
I mean, it is interesting, but I don't like it.
You know, I have a slight amount of empathy, because as far as I know, he hasn't done any of the real bad crimes that remove all of that from me.
But at the same time, it's just like, ah, you're rich and famous.
Stop driving drunk, you idiot.
Don't do a bunch of poppers so you can fuck your boyfriend, and then drive around all crazy, hopped up on other stuff, you know?
Calm down.
And of course, the final act of this whole thing is that this is actually a sign of Timberlake's renaissance.
And of course, in order to achieve a renaissance, you have to engage in a humiliation ritual because that's one of the other big things that the Illuminati hunters are searching for.
When people saw the photo of Timberlake in handcuffs, they were like, oh, this is such an Illuminati humiliation ritual.
Oh, this is so obvious.
You have no idea.
Is it?
Who cares?
Justin Timberlake fans don't care.
They're not going to stop supporting the boy.
People like us who've never cared about Justin Timberlake, or people like me who've never cared about Justin Timberlake, really, are going to continue to just be like, ah, what an idiot.
Stop driving drunk.
And then all the people who hated him for various reasons are going to hate him even harder.
The status quo doesn't change at all.
I don't get it.
This would be the tamest way to humiliate somebody?
Yeah, you're gonna get pitched for driving drunk.
Got him!
Yeah, it was like when they humiliated John Cena by having him walk, quote-unquote, naked on stage versus Adonis' body.
Oh, look at John Cena being humiliated by showing us how shredded he is!
Oh, take that, Cena!
Oh, got you!
If those people want to be credible, they need to be picking targets, and it's clear, like, the thing that's happening is going to damage them badly, but temporarily, and then they'll come right back.
Like, Will Smith.
Will Smith would have been a great target.
That slap thing.
It should have just been, like, humiliation ritual for the both of them.
They're both gonna look bad.
Boo.
Everybody hates them.
Will Smith does Bad Boys 4.
Second biggest movie this summer.
Just crushing it.
Smashing it.
Everybody doesn't give a fuck about Will Smith anymore.
Like, slapping Chris Rock.
They're just like, ah, what a thing.
That happened.
I remember, like, in the short term, people were like, oh, Will Smith is done after this.
And it's just like, y'all are crazy.
Remember when people were like, he needs to be charged for terrorism?
Yeah!
He 9-11ed Chris Rock.
Yeah.
Just all of a sudden somebody comes over, whispers in the ear, just like, there was another slap here, just to go, shit!
Oh, second slap hit Chris Rock!
The first one I could have just chalked up to like, poor, you know, communication or whatever, but the second one, oh brother.
Yeah, this is obvious terrorism.
That was only two years ago.
Oh my god, it feels like- Goddamn COVID time dilation.
I have no concept of when anything happened now.
For a brief moment, I thought you meant 9-11, and I was like, I don't get that joke, but it did also make me chuckle.
9-11's every year.
Yeah, we were just like, I can't believe that was only two years ago.
I should just say that about any crazy thing.
Ruby Ridge just left.
Alright, but we should still move on.
Okay, second Bush topic.
We're going to do some brief updates to Trump's brain continuing to deteriorate and Joe Biden, I guess, being replaced.
Which is a crazy thing that I haven't heard yet.
So let's start with that one.
Mike, what's going on with Biden being replaced?
Well this has been a right-wing fever dream since literally Biden ran for the presidency in 2020 was that there's no way the Democrats are actually going to run the boring white guy.
We need someone at the top of the ticket that we right-wingers can like properly froth and rage and hate at.
And Q even had a Q-drop about quote-unquote change of batter and it was basically implied that Hillary was going to be the 2020 nominee.
Whoa!
Hold the phone!
Since when have Democrats not been putting up boring guys?
I mean, like, semi-recently they sort of stopped doing that.
We got an Obama that they tried to get Hillary in there.
But, like, the rest of history has been nothing but boring guys all the way down.
Like, Democrats are historically really boring.
That's their whole trait.
They're just boring.
Well, that's the thing.
I think for most of these people, Democrat history began with Obama, and they were just like, they're nominating a black guy?
Which is crazy!
Because in my lifetime, their biggest victory was stealing the presidency from Al Gore, through like some trickery and deceit.
They were just like, hey Chad's a center of bullshit.
Al Gore's not your president.
And it's just like, but he won the popular vote.
They just didn't care.
Anyway, sorry.
Yeah.
So this has been going on for a long time, but now even a friend of the show, Charlie Kirk, Haley's BFF, Charlie Kirk has now declared that on July 11th, Trump will be remanded for jail.
And at the same time, Biden will be replaced as the Democrat nominee on July 11th.
So the whole race is going to just turn on a dime on July 11th when suddenly Michelle Obama is the Democratic Party nominee for president and Donald Trump's in the hooscow.
Donald Trump's just sent to Rikers, just comes out ripped with prison tats after the election.
Honestly, that would be incredible.
I'm all for that.
Please do that.
If the Democrats' big plan is to, like, replace Joe Biden with somebody more dynamic and interesting, yeah.
Do it.
Okay!
You have my support!
But the problem is that this is, again, a fantasy, but they've been doing this for forever, and literally every QAnon right-wing idiot I see online, they're just like, The Democrats know they're going to have to replace Biden.
The only question is who?
And today I actually saw Brian Cates have a long-winded article about how FCC regulations require that so-and-so, they can't give that Biden-Harris money to anybody.
It's like, buddy, you think your enemies are funded by the Rothschilds who are literal trillionaires who have more wealth in the world combined?
They don't need whatever money the DNC's raised recently.
They can just create Rothschild PAC and fund it with five trillion dollars to make sure that every commercial we see is for Gavin Newsom or whoever you think it is that's going to be the replacement.
Note to self.
Smoking on that Rothschild PAC.
Yes!
Also, was that a new voice that you just busted out?
That, like, high register sort of squeaky?
I don't think I've heard that squeaky voice before.
That seems like a new... Have you been working on some new material there, buddy?
I didn't even know I did it.
Did it just come out of you?
That's excellent.
I mean, I like to see you opening up.
You're blossoming like a flower after four or five years of us doing this.
I'm finally growing as a performer.
You're like that corpse flower.
You bloom rarely, but when it happens, my God, so beautiful and odious.
Mike Raines, the durian of podcast groups.
Okay, so that's the Biden replacement theory.
Of course it wasn't as cool as I was hoping.
I was hoping they were going back to their, he's a hologram, he's got a clone, he's an actor in a mask.
They're doing some weird stuff where they're talking about that and how in October or something he'll just resign the presidency and then Harris will limp across the finish line and lose to Trump on a landslide because it's all been scripted that way.
But that's a different I mean, if they have the hologram technology, my god, what I want is for Biden to win again and when he's being sworn in, he hits the button and the hologram deactivates and it's just like, AOC.
She's like, it was me the whole time!
Progressive socialism for everybody!
Boom!
Overnight socialism!
It's happening!
That would be awesome!
Because that is how the presidency works.
You just wave your hand and make whatever you want true.
That would be awesome if like it literally Biden was acknowledged that he's not really who he claims to be and when once he's sworn in you'll find out the true core Biden like we're electing mystery president that would be like it's like a contra villain yes there's your old reference for the people out of the way for me to make one of those every show Okay, so that was the Biden Replacement Theory.
Now let's talk about Trump's failing cognitive ability.
I would like to start by talking about how he fucking brazenly decided to call Biden out.
He was like, I demand that we take a challenge of the mind!
Yes!
Yeah, he's like calling for training.
He's like, you can just sort of tell the flop sweat is forming on his brow as we're getting ever closer to the debate between him and Biden.
Like, he's calling for Biden to be drug tested.
And I just, well, then let's see you take a test there, Mr. Adderall.
That would be lovely.
And then beyond that, we had The fact that he talked about how he aced the cognitive test again, and he said that the doctor that gave it to him was Randy Johnson, which is not the name of the doctor who gave it to him.
It was Randy Jackson.
Randy Jackson, by the way, was Trump's personal physician when he was president, and he's also a congressman now.
So Randy Jackson will probably be legally changing his name to Randy Johnson any minute now to make Trump retroactively right.
He's going to just be like, no, the god emperor didn't speak.
I told him that was my name.
I don't know how those documents said my name wasn't that.
He was giving another speech yesterday, I believe, and somehow he segued back to sharks!
The man just can't get over the sharks!
I hadn't heard about this.
Incredible.
I love how much he hates and is terrified of sharks.
Yes.
He just did it again.
Just, you know, like, America's dealing with a lot of issues.
Inflation, crime, Israel-Palestine.
Let's talk sharks.
It's time for some sharks.
Did he do the same anecdote?
Is he just continuing to workshop it, or was it like a different thing?
Was he still trying to do the battery thing, or was this a different, a different jag?
I only saw a small bit of it, but he was just talking again about how people defend sharks, and he doesn't understand it, because sharks are objectively bad.
Like, how can you?
In his mind, he doesn't understand how anyone can be pro-shark.
Like, when someone tries to explain to him, yo, Mr. Trump, Mr. Former President, like, they're animals.
Animals don't think, like, highly.
So, like, if they bite, it's not just because they're, like, violent murder fish.
They actually, like, have instincts and stuff.
And he's just like, His eyes just gloss over and he's like, murder fish, bad!
What do you think the odds are that he ever called like a meeting of like the admirals or whatever in the Navy, like secret president meeting, and he was just like, rustle up our boys, I gotta talk to them, and then they got all the people together and he was just like, what can we do about these sharks?
Like, I have always hated them, and now I'm the president of the United States, and I would love if we could start killing a lot of them, just getting rid of them, that would be awesome.
We have these marine biologists trying to explain to him the ecosystem, and he's just like, but I just want to kill the sharks!
Can't we just kill them?
Yeah, I just want to look those scientists dead in the eye and tell them, I don't care.
Kill all of the sharks.
So funny.
What a crazy thing to be that obsessed slash terrified of.
Just stay on land, my guy.
Just be on land.
Yeah, it's not like you're ever gonna see a shark in your life, buddy.
I mean, he's, uh... Also, like, and of the places where you might see a shark, Mar-a-Lago's pretty fucking close.
How about Mar-a-Lago not so much in Shark Territory?
It's literally a stretch of island surrounded by water where sharks live.
What the fuck is wrong with you, you dingus?
Mar-a-Lago should be in, like, Omaha, Nebraska.
It should be completely removed from any potential shark.
Oh God, yeah.
So we are now, I believe, like eight days out from the big Biden-Trump debate, if Trump actually attends.
And again, like his side, like all the Republicans I'm looking at, they're just like, I don't know how Biden shows up for this thing.
It's like you You all do remember that Biden clobbered him four years ago, twice.
And the only reason why he didn't do it three times was because Trump nearly died after the first debate, where Trump went on stage as a biological weapon, tried to kill Biden with his COVID, failed, and then nearly died from the COVID he had already contracted.
And so, yeah, it's Who's hosting the debate if it happens?
What'd you say?
Who's hosting the debate if it happens?
CNN. CNN's hosting the debate.
And I saw Clinton Klonzilla, that moron, he posted a thing where he was just like,
no live crowd, advantage Biden.
The big thing they were talking about is the microphones cut off automatically when your time runs out.
There's like no, it's like literally the microphone just has like a, you have three minutes to talk and then your microphone just goes click and it's just off.
So like Trump can't filibuster, like he's just got a tight three minute window to get his like rambling nonsense in and complain about sharks.
And basically this guy was just like, no live crowd.
Basically every advantage is Biden's except for the fact that no notes are allowed to be brought into the meeting.
And obviously Trump would never take any notes and Biden wouldn't take notes.
So that's kind of an advantage for Trump that Biden doesn't get to bring notes in.
But that's it.
The thing is designed to just be super bad for Trump, because he can't filibuster because the microphone's turned off, and there's no crowd.
So he can't play off the crowd's energy and be like, hey, singer, hey!
Because he's just a giant narcissist that needs people to love him.
So if it's just Biden and a moderator looking at him, Trump's going to be super uncomfortable the whole time.
So yeah, it's really funny because it's a no-win situation for Trump because either he ditches and looks like a huge coward or he does the debate and he gets smoked.
He's even done an interview where he's like, yeah, I might lose the debate on purpose.
He actually figured out a way to lower expectations.
For the first time in his life, he finally realized, you know what?
This is going to go bad.
I need to lower expectations.
I need to actually let people know.
Probably not going to win this.
We call that the Jeff Keighley.
If you know, you know.
OK, moving on, we're talking about our current and former presidents being a bunch of dum-dums and or replacements in various ways.
And now we're talking about the greatest state this side of all the other states.
It's Arizona, everyone's favorite state, featuring our favorite correspondent from that state, Hayley, aka Arizona Right Watch.
What up?
Hi, Hayley.
It's time to talk about your precious, precious state.
Cool.
So, let's see.
We made national news this week because there was a man arrested here because he wanted to shoot up a Bad Bunny concert.
Did you guys hear about this?
No, that sounds very exciting and horrifying.
Yeah, didn't hear about this one.
Okay, so yeah, Mark Adams Preto, 58 years old, was indicted by a federal grand jury on firearms trafficking, transfer of a firearm for use in a hate crime, and possession of an unregistered firearm.
So this guy was a gun vendor at Crossroads of the West gun show, which I've been to, and honestly, I only went once because the vibes are really fucked.
Like, people were pretty rude there.
It cost money just to enter, even though it's just like a roadshow to buy guns.
It's like, I have to pay to get in to buy guns.
Well, yes, because that is the literal price you pay to get illegal guns.
Yeah, I don't know.
Once you pay the cover charge, you go in there, and you're just like, I would like this pile of guns.
And they're like, OK, here you go.
And you're just like, wow, you didn't even ask for an ID or nothing?
And they're just like, hey!
You're an American or whatever, get guns!
Was that like one of those, like, you can buy the Turner Diaries kind of gun shows?
Yep.
There's always one booth at this place that you basically find that's like, there's a guy that's selling some shit.
He's selling patches.
You can ask him to see behind his wares kind of vibes, you know?
Um, I'm pretty sure, honestly, this guy was one of them.
Uh, cause yeah, he was selling, uh, his supposedly from his, uh, Home collection, which that sounds suspicious enough.
Oh, sorry, I just want to say briefly, I did actually hear about this.
I saw the photo of this guy walking through, like, one of the two photos in the news article I saw was just like him, like, kind of walking awkwardly through a parking lot wearing like a blue button-up shirt.
Anyway, I did see this, yes.
Yeah, with a big ol' long rifle, yeah.
So basically he started mouthing off to somebody else at Crossroads of the West saying that he planned, leading up to the 2024 election, to target an area that had a lot of black people.
And he chose a Bad Bunny concert in Atlanta.
And yeah, he literally said, the reason I say Atlanta is Georgia is a fucked up state now, when I was a kid it was one of the most conservative states in the country.
Why is it not now?
Because as the crimes got worse in LA, St.
Louis, and all these other cities, the N-words moved out of those places and moved to Atlanta.
That's why it isn't great anymore, and they've been there for a couple years, several years.
And then he planned to leave a confederate flag at the shooting to send a message and he Yeah, wanted to also make it clear that it was a racially motivated attack and he basically told this dude he was going to shout KKK all the way.
So he was mouthing off to this guy and eventually, over time, some federal agents started to come to these gun shows.
Because it seems like some people snitched.
And yeah, so over a course of months at like the Crossroads of the West gun shows throughout the state, like an undercover agent and like this source just kept talking to him about it and he just kept revealing more details that he planned.
I sold him some guns that I weren't registered and he got picked up.
Um, so yeah, he only faces, um, 15 years, because, uh, it's, um, they mainly just got
him on gun stuff.
Uh, but he's old, so he'll die in prison.
So that's, uh, yeah, that's your story for Arizona.
I'm really surprised that it's only 15 years.
Cause it was just, that guy sounded like such an awesome moron in the sense that he's like, Hey, I would like to commit a crime and I'm going to talk to you about that.
And I'm also going to put every hate crime and terrorism modifier on that for bonus penalties.
I really want to make sure that I get hit with as many different things to make this as bad as possible for me.
But yeah, if he's an old dude, he's getting 15 years in a club fed, then he deserves every crumb of that.
So yeah, that's great.
I think they can add more time with the other charges, but yeah, the main maximum penalty for the transfer of a firearm for use in a hate crime is 15 years.
That's the bonus.
That's right there.
The hate crime modifier and the transfer of the firearm.
Bam.
Good job, idiot.
Also, didn't Ladd have lofty goals for this to just be one of many attacks to start an actual cross-country race war?
Yeah, he wanted it to inspire at the time.
He wanted martial law to be declared.
He wanted to do it leading up to the 2024 election specifically so he was hoping martial law would be declared and basically, yeah, a race war would start.
You know, your typical white power type, terrorism type shit.
Dude, they must get such turgid boners over the idea of martial law.
Just like a mandate that allows them to just go shoot people with their guns.
That's all they want in this world is to be able to shoot people with their guns.
Yeah, they just want to imagine The Purge and like they are one of the badasses in The Purge like going around just like wasting people and like winning and it's like BTW, buddy, you're never going to be the main character in any movie.
You're a 50-something schmuck with an AR-15.
You're dead within the first three days of the purge.
BTW.
It's just not happening.
It's just not happening.
You're like, urgh, look at my big gun!
It's like, yeah, you're also slow and have no reflexes.
Everybody in America has a big gun.
So guess what?
I can't shut up, apparently.
Yeah, you can't shut up either.
You're like, I want to kill all you people who are not white!
It's like, oh wait, there's a lot of non-whites here with guns and now they're all firing at me.
Oh, now I'm dead.
Oh, don't break.
It's like, great job.
Alrighty, is that all the Arizona news that's fit to print for the week?
I feel like I'll make another appearance, probably in the Sneak O Punch, just because it's kind of semi-Turning Point-affiliated.
I would certainly hope so.
We do let you out of your cage for a reason.
No, get in there, mix it up, whatever you're comfortable.
Tell us to shut our stupid mouths.
Overwrite us with your powerful voice and say whatever the fuck you want.
But yeah.
On that note, I guess it's time for us to get into the cues in the news.
From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's cues in the news.
All righty, leading our Q slash conservative nonsense headlines this week is the two great tastes that go great together we've always hoped for.
Vladdy Daddy, Vladimir Putin, and his sweet, sweet country of Russia going to the old Kimikim over in North Korea, and they're shaking hands and doing fist bumps and raising each other in chairs above a crowd of people, all cheering for them.
Mike, how did this go down?
Are we loving it?
Do we think these guys are BFF?
Are they best friends forever?
It does appear that way from all the people I'm reading.
They're just so happy that two of their biggest heroes, Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong-un, have
gotten together, did the grip and grin.
Putin's making some noises about giving North Korea long-range missiles to shoot into South
Korea because he's getting his ass paddled in Ukraine, so maybe he's going to start some
trouble on the Korean Peninsula and argobargle.
It's like, buddy, you're in no position to give anybody any weapons.
You're trotting out tanks from the 1950s to try to conquer Ukraine.
So don't be acting like you got any juice to do anything else.
And if you are going to North Korea, one of the poorest, most backward nations in the world, and you're begging them for arms, In order to fight Ukraine that is such an unbelievably bad look and yet like all of their here all these people are spinning it like oh look North Korea aligning with Russia, aligning with China, aligning with India.
Like we're seeing where the lines on World War III are being drawn and it's not good for NATO in America.
It's like America can end the world like six times over.
We don't need allies.
We have lots of nuclear weapons.
This is not even an argument.
Calm down.
North Korea joining Russia, much like Elsa a minute ago, this doesn't move the needle at all.
This has literally no impact on world geopolitical power.
North Korea couldn't do anything to anybody.
Unless they just wanted to shoot off one of their nukes.
Which means North Korea doesn't exist anymore.
Also, I saw these headlines.
Of course everyone's going to talk about two big world leaders meeting like this.
Especially when they're both bad guys relative to the U.S.
But at the same time, it's just like, they were always pals, right?
Like, this is just them reaffirming, they're just like, yes, continued pals.
Because Russia being their pal is the only reason why North Korea gets to be a thing, right?
North Korea exists because China and Russia wanted them to exist.
The main reason why this is a big deal is because Putin actually went into North Korea, which is kind of like the thing nobody does, because it's the hermit kingdom.
It's so isolated that if the North Koreans want to do any foreign policy, usually their leader has to go out into the world and be like, yay!
I'm not going to meet you in the land of starving people and malnutrition and everything is terrible and bad.
I'm actually going to go to your country that's probably not an actual hellscape.
I don't know, Dennis Rodman seemed like he had a pretty good time.
Yeah!
Dennis Rodman, noted leader of America, yes.
Yeah, he went over there, he had a great time, then he came back and he was just like, I can't believe that guy dunked on me.
Me, Dennis Rodman, NBA player, had no match in the 1v1 against our glorious leader.
I mean, not glorious leader, oh shit!
The one thing that's really nuts is the Kim family is obsessed with basketball.
Kim Jong-un's dad created new rules for basketball, and the Korean Basketball League plays under those bizarre rules.
It's very interesting.
I saw an article about how much the Kims just love that stuff.
All these people who are like, America sucks, blah blah blah.
We have cultural victories so insane that even North Korea emulates us.
Even North Korea is obsessed with our culture.
Like, yeah, there was some video of Kim Jong Un, maybe at the Trump Summit.
Kim Jong-un arrived and there were like 10 North Korean guys running alongside his limo and that was because he saw the movie In the Line of Fire and he just loved it.
And he's like, do that for me!
I want lots of people running around my limo and making me look cool because I saw it in an American movie.
Yeah, I think we can all agree that North Korea is great, but unfortunately Russia getting involved is a deal breaker, you know?
I was like, Kim Jong-un is mad tight and his basketball skills are obviously beyond reproach, according to Dennis Rodman, who he 1v1'd easily.
So yeah, I'm devastated to learn that Russia is their friend and that Vladimir Putin is apparently there begging them for some of their bullets or whatever.
Yes.
He's like, don't worry, it'll all work out because once we have Ukraine, then We'll really have it.
We'll have that Ukraine.
I love that the end goal of this, when it's turning into probably going to be a five-year military campaign, maybe more, even if he ends up winning, quote-unquote, taking over Ukraine, it's like, what the fuck then?
He's like, yeah, I've got it.
It's mine now.
Got it.
I conquered Ukraine at the low cost of $15 trillion and five million dead Russians.
Woo!
What a win!
And at least half of the global perception that Russia's a real military threat Yeah, yeah, exactly.
It's just like, I don't know, like, I'm a pretty liberal American, but if we found out that there was a weakness in Russia's, like, nuclear arsenal or whatever, I'd just be like, maybe we do it.
I mean, you know, like, if they can't blow up the world, like, let's get in there.
Like, they're really crappy at war.
We could just smash them.
I mean, like, I've seen people that know much more about, like, militaries and, like, politics than I, who've said that, like, if Poland was just like, you know what, fuck it, we're leaving NATO, Poland could probably make it to Moscow unstopped right now.
The Polish could just be like, fuck you!
Because, like, basically, ever since World War II, Poland's been, like, after they got out from under communism in the 90s, they were like, you know what we need to do?
Arm the shit out of ourselves.
So if Russia even looks cross-eyed at us, we can fuck their shit up.
So it's like, you go Poland, you do it.
Get that job done.
Fuck yeah, dude.
I've always loved Poland.
There's a Polish sandwich shop downtown where I live.
I don't go there nearly enough, but every time I do, I'm just like, wow, the service here is horrible, but y'all make a great sandwich.
Those people.
Cause it's also like a, it's like a European style like grocer.
So it's mostly, I'm assuming it's mostly there to cater to a specific clientele.
So when you just have some like random normie come up the street and just be like, can I get that sandwich I can't pronounce?
They're just like, Oh, this fucking guy.
And then five minutes later, they're just like, here's your incredible sandwich.
Thank you.
Leave politely.
Here's your tip.
I'm running away.
Okay, cool.
Well, that's good.
I'm glad that our buddies Putin and Kim Jong Un are still getting along.
Good for them.
What a time to be alive, I guess.
Okay.
That's the more boring of our news items.
Now it's time to get to the real meat and or potatoes of this week.
This has been such an exciting ride to go on.
Everybody loves this.
Sneeko, a person I had never heard of before, got rocket punched.
Really?
In front of a camera.
It was great.
We've briefly mentioned him on the show just as kind of like an Andrew Tate knockoff.
Oh, Hayley, I very rarely retain these people's names or information.
So few of them matter.
They're all so irrelevant to my day life.
But this guy quickly rocketed up the charts of interest because he got punched, like, real violently.
And I'm about that life.
So let's talk about this.
Boom.
Take it away, Amanda.
Yes, it's Amanda's turn to lead.
Where should I start?
Like, how much of this do you want to do?
All of AFFPAC or not?
Okay, so what was this event?
I don't even know what event this was at.
Oh, so the very beginning.
Okay, so Turning Point USA had a conference in Detroit this past weekend, and Nick Fuentes noted Hitler guy.
He decided he would hold his AfPak 4 during Turning Point USA in Detroit.
So there were already some issues because AfPak 4 has been delayed so many times because he's always holding this conference, the America First Political Action Conference, alongside CPAC or Turning Point USA.
So they're supposed to have it in December and they canceled it.
Then they announced it for during Detroit.
Here are some problems.
Number one, Gropers afraid of Detroit.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's really funny.
Two, he was only announcing VIP guests.
He wasn't announcing speakers.
So, like, that was alarming.
You know, if I was a little idiot grouper who had paid $100, $150, or a sponsor who paid like $10,000, I would be like, I wonder who the speakers are.
This is really weird.
So, we get there.
We all get to Detroit.
I...
I am going around hotel to hotel.
First I'm calling them and saying, are you hosting AFPAC?
Are you hosting what, you know, and everybody goes, you know, I'm like, are you hosting, you know, American First Political Action Conference, or maybe it'd be under America First Foundation, AFF, or Nick Fuentes.
And everybody is like, please hold.
And then they come back and they're like, we got the Michigan Political Committee.
We got Republicans Conference America.
Are you talking about the Turning Point USA convention?
No one knew what the fuck I'm talking about.
I call this one hotel.
And the guy sounds young.
And he goes, Um, we are not hosting that, but many of our guests are attending that tonight, and I was like, oh my god!
Like, this guy knew what it was, you know?
And I was like, okay!
And so then I like, I sent some guys inside that like, look like Roy Furse to ask in person, because I was like, obviously I'm a woman, maybe like, Oh girl, he's just got cooties!
So they were like, no, he seems really adamant it's not there.
So I was like, okay, it has to be at a hotel right by this hotel.
Because why else would they all be staying here?
So I find out.
I call another hotel.
It's called the Siren Hotel.
And now I'm in a battle with the Siren Hotel because they insist this isn't true.
I called them and I asked if they have the same event tonight, that night, and they go, we have a private event.
There is no point of contact listed.
There's no organization name listed.
Our events guy, Bill, is the point of contact and I can't talk about it with you anymore.
And I was like, cool!
And then they hung up on me, and then I called again, they didn't pick up, I had someone else call, they didn't pick up, and I finally later had someone call, and they confirmed to this person over the phone, and I have the recording, that the America First Political Action Conference VIP dinner was happening there that night.
So at the same time that I'm doing this, the venue that's hosting the actual AFPAC is calling the police on Nick.
Because they don't want to host a stupid Nazi event.
And, you know, I guess there was some contract fraud that they were using.
They were, like, pretending to be a different organization, going through a third party, like, whatever.
So, you know, within a couple of hours' time, I get his VIP dinner cancelled, and he has to tell all those Groifers that also the actual conference that people have flown into Detroit for is cancelled.
So that's, you know, a real bummer if you're a little Nazi.
They have a little Nazi rally outside of Trump's speech, Turning Point USA, which we can talk about or not.
It's up to you guys.
And then I, you know, I am being a bitch.
I'm feeling very smug, very proud of myself for ruining this dinner with so many VIP guests that I personally hate.
And I get messages from many people telling me that there is a new event going on.
They're at some rooftop bar.
And then someone figures out where this rooftop bar is, and I go and sit at the bar next door, out front.
They share a patio space because it's co-owned by the same people.
And I order a margarita, and I sit there, I drink it with a giant grin on my face as I watch all these idiots get kicked out for doing too many Hitler salutes inside.
I get to see Sneako.
Now, inside, what's going on is they're giving all these speeches.
So Jared Taylor, I guess, gave a speech about, he was saying, Negro this, Negro that.
Of course, security at this bar is all black, by the way.
No regard for that whatsoever for them.
You know, Nick is up there, they start Hitler saluting Nick, and so the bar turns up the music, drowns out the speeches, and tells them, your contract was done at 10, it's like 11, get the fuck out.
Um, and they do not want to do that.
They start antagonizing security and that is when the security guard leaps down from a ledge.
Sneako knocks off his hat and the security guard leaps down from a ledge and just fucking decks Sneako right in the face.
Knocks out half his tooth, bloodies his nose.
Very sad stuff.
Now Sneako He is known to me, he's like a misogynist streamer, but he's also the guy who would put on the Nazi music and dance around in a Ye 24 jacket.
And then after Ye was kind of dead on arrival, he would be like, I'm really sad because my friends and family don't talk to me now because of all the Hitler stuff.
So he's an idiot who deserved to be punched in the face.
Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't he some sort of not-pure-white?
He's black.
I had no idea.
I saw a little picture of him in relation to this, because I saw the clip, and then the article I was reading showed a little picture of him, and I was just like... I was just like, I don't think he's a white guy, you know?
But I couldn't be for sure, so yeah, that's pretty interesting.
How did you think that that was going to go down?
Great question.
He's also a recent Muslim convert because of Andrew Tate.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Andrew Tate is a Muslim?
One of the Tates is, right?
Muslim in quotes.
Well, yeah, obviously, of course.
How do I feel like how Nick's a Catholic?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Was that before or after he was fighting ghosts in prison?
Is that what got him to convert?
Was he just like, ah, I'm wrestling with my literal demons and I'm going to come out.
I love Allah.
Boom.
I'm not sure.
This was like all around the same time.
Yeah.
Nice.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like how Russell Brand became a Catholic.
Like basically if you're like new to the right wing grift, you're like moving into the right wing grift.
You gotta be like, okay, time to pick a religion.
Dart to the dart board.
Boom.
Okay.
Now I'm a hardcore Mormon.
Time for some Moroni.
I mean, it's just whatever.
Does it count as progress that Sniko thought he could do it being Muslim?
That seems like a weird form of progress.
I feel like if this was 10 years ago, you'd throw that dart at the dart board, you'd be like, I'm gonna be Muslim!
Doesn't count.
Mulligan.
Throw that, get that dart off the board.
Okay, now we're gonna try again!
Well, Jared Taylor, I mean, he's very, so of American Renaissance fame.
So Jared Taylor is, I think, something pretty relevant about him here is that he's generally regarded as like, you know, very anti-Semitic, white nationalist, but you know, he did say like, Jews, they look white to me.
Um, so I guess that's some kind of progress.
Just kidding, it's not.
Um, but he's very anti-Black, um, and has, like, consistently been so.
Um, and so, you know, I guess, like, it is interesting that, like, the movement has shifted, but I think it's just, like, a response to demographic shift in America more than anything else, because If your movement is alienating so many people, you know, before you get to the nitty-gritty of, like, Irish versus British, you know, like, it's just, you gotta move those goalposts a little bit.
And so I think that's what it is.
I think the most interesting part about it to me is that, of course, I think Christian nationalist is a bad term, but it's a term that apparently is what's in favor.
You know, I think what's interesting is that Zico is supporting this Christian nationalist, this Christian fascist movement, and he is not.
A believer that Christ is King.
And that is, I think, the weirdest part to me.
Because, you know, like, what's up with that, man?
Well, what's up with that is that just this morning I saw a little article talking about how our boy Sneko was apparently upset that his friends maybe had been making light of his rocket punch incident because they don't really care because he is a person of color.
And they actually think it's pretty funny that he got hit in the face.
I saw some stream of his where he was complaining about that, like in an article this morning.
And he's not the only person finding out that hard lesson, because our trad wife lady from last week's episode, I believe?
Oh yeah, it's just continued.
She was there too.
She's also finding out, because apparently they're just like, we don't know, she might be...
I don't think that Zico's- I mean, I don't think it's going to change much for him.
I mean, like, when he was like, oh, my friends are mad at me because of the Hitler stuff, I mean, it's the same evening he'll deliver that he had.
I think that he is upset.
I think that he's- he's not angry.
I think it probably hurts his feelings a little bit, but, you know, the punch is objectively funny.
And he even says in the clip, like, Nick's riding high on AfPak, and he is.
And that's what happens when you stream and you're exhausted, you know?
That's life.
I don't think he's going to leave the movement.
I don't think it's going to be... I don't think it's a lesson for him.
Because this is pretty much on par with what he said, what was it?
A hundred years ago when the Yates Show was happening.
And now he's still doing Hitler Salutes.
He's still out there and nothing changed.
And really I think just that is his demographic.
And I think it's complex on an individual level for these people.
But I don't think he'll be leaving.
I mean...
Yeah, like that is... That is... It's what you're signing up for, and I think you know it.
So he might be learning this lesson in the moment while his mouth hurts.
But I don't think it's a long-term lesson at all.
Oh no, he's made his bed.
He's like, well, this is the bed I've made.
I've got a lie in it.
So Nick's having some fun, and I'll probably always be lesser in Nick and all the other people's eyes because I'm not white.
But again, Like, hey, when you're doing the Hitler thing, this is, them's the brakes.
Like, I just feel like he's coming to grips with the fact that, like, this is his life, and this is where he's at now, and it's just not great.
But he can't change.
We did something like a Supernatural-style event a la, you know, like a Christmas movie or whatever to happen so that he can learn the lesson of what happens if his team wins without his team actually winning.
He needs to be It's a Wonderful Life.
Or, you know, like the Ghost of Christmas Future.
But it's just like, wait a minute, this sucks!
These people, like, they're not taking care of me at all!
This place is horrible for people to look like me.
They're just like, yeah, motherfucker, this is what happens.
This is your good ending.
That's the thing that always makes me laugh about Ben Shapiro, when Nick Fuentes is yelling at Ben Shapiro and the Gripers are giving him shit as he's moving about from whatever convention it is to wherever hotel he's staying in.
I'm just like, Ben, this is the end result of you winning.
Literally, this is the victory you're hoping for when Trump and the Republicans seize power and make us a fascist state.
You're not going to like the outcome because they're going to side with Nick over you 10 out of 10 times.
This is what happens when you become a famous rapper.
This is what Mike Reyes is getting at.
Okay, so any more fun that we need to discuss at this year's convention?
I mean, I do love talking about idiots getting punched in the face, but... Amanda, what do you think of Turning Point USA playing stupid when Candace Owens is on the stage chanting Christ is King at the crowd and they kind of put out a statement that's like, it has nothing to do with anything!
I'm going to caveat this with that I had pressed credentials to TPOSA and they revoked them, which is expected because I have a lifetime ban.
So I, you know, I also, like, even if I'd had the credentials, I wouldn't have really gone into the conference.
I don't really care about it.
And that's for obvious reasons, right?
Like, I'm there for Nick and nobody else is.
But this is like what Nick has talked about for years.
For years, he will put on Telegram, you know, Charlie Kirk, Matt Walsh will say something and he'll say, Kory Furze won.
Charlottesville won.
And he's right.
He's completely right.
When it comes to replaying USA, that's what's happening.
They're co-opting his language.
They're co-opting his stuff.
You know, I marched to the Capitol with Kory Furze who chanted Crisis King on January 6th.
So that is, that's a W for Nick, for sure.
I actually, you know, I thought that Candace Owens might actually come to AFFPAC if it had been in a secure location.
Same.
Yeah.
And I think if it had been in a secure location, she would have been there.
Um, you know, she's lucky because the cops made them all leave and they all, I mean, none of them were prepared.
There were very few people wearing masks.
Um, I will say that rally in front of Turning Point OSA, like we can extend this further with TPOSA playing stupid.
People were walking out of the Trump speech and into Nick's speech.
And, um, all around me, no, I mean, I did not see a single mask, no gray people wearing a mask.
Um, they were still wearing TPOSA credentials with their blue hats.
I, you know, and I, it was everywhere.
People don't care.
They don't care anymore about being out of the training point.
You say, cause training point is, they will not evict them and no longer matters.
So, you know, and, and the thing is at the end of the day, you know, there's a list of names.
Specifically, I was at CPAC and, um, you know, I wrote an article after they yanked my press credentials there.
And I said, I was on a loud end, but here are these new Nazis who were.
And I named them.
Ryan Sanchez.
Ryan Bettenker.
Both at Turning Point USA.
Kyle Ferreira.
Also at Turning Point USA.
Valley Zoomer.
He was there.
They're all allowed in.
This article got a lot of attention.
It got a lot of attention within the Hopkins circles with Matt Schlapp himself.
So these people knew, and these names could be on a list if they wanted it to be.
In fact, I believe that Kyle Ferreira's name was already on a list of people who were not allowed in.
That was my understanding.
And so I don't, you know, I don't know.
I think that there's, like, it is what it is now, you know.
There will always be two years after the fact.
Whatever Nick does, Charlie will do it then, too.
Yeah, it's pretty bleak.
The people that I saw, some of the people that I saw in that crowd, I've been trying to associate with Nick because I knew in my heart that they were.
I've been trying to have direct evidence of them associating with Nick for two years.
And they were just sitting there in front of me without a mask on.
You know?
They don't care.
Not anymore.
Yeah, even Posobiec was waving, like, that white boy summer flag on stage.
There's just, like, a... Because, like, Nick comes in with, like, the group, knowing... Goes into the People's Convention knowing he'll get booted immediately.
And he's, like, with this big crowd that it's, like, once they're done marching with Nick, they all go back into the People's Convention because they all have passes.
I hate that White Boy Summer got co-opted by these racists and now it's like a racist thing.
That's a bummer.
I have to talk about this because this, Mike, I teased you with this, but they marched in with a guy, Michael Ray Corey.
He came in with Jake Shields when it was him and Fuentes.
And the Groypers trying to get into the People's Convention.
And that Cory guy is one of the Austin Steinbart guys.
He promotes the Quantum Party in his profile.
He literally tweeted, like, we need an America First Quantum Party.
Solidarity Alliance.
What the hell is a quantum party?
It's Austin Steinbart who is the time-traveling Q guy.
He's the guy that claims to be Q from the future.
He has a party that's like surrounded around his so-called quantum physics and it's called the Quantum Party.
Hell yeah!
Get him involved!
Who do I have to talk to to get him more involved?
That would make my weekly burden so much lessent here.
I would love to talk about this guy every week and his nonsense.
I'm sure his take on science is really science-y.
Yeah.
He was around during the audit stuff.
That's how I got eyes on him.
And he's a total Steinbart guy.
So I thought that was funny that they had a Q guy with them.
No, I don't like that at all.
Because I don't want to deal with the Q shit.
Get the fuck away from Eric first.
Leave me alone.
Go away.
And the best part about Steinbart is he's not even the Q shit.
Because the QAnon people fucking hate him.
Because his whole mythos of, in the future, I am Q. Sending messages to myself in the past.
They hate how much he tried to make himself the main character of the QAnon story.
Like, oh god, all the other... You know what?
I believe him.
Yes!
I for one think he's legit.
Hashtag bring back the Time Cube.
We need more Time Cube.
This was a long time ago, so I haven't mentioned it in a long time, but when he started, when Austin Steinbart started trying to promote himself, He DM'd me and a bunch of other QAnon debunkers in an effort to try to show us stuff, to try to get us to talk to him, engage with him.
He DM'd me, he DM'd Travis Few, Mike Rothschild, a bunch of people.
We all got this wave of DMs of Austin Steinbart standing in front of server farms and places giving a thumbs up.
And he was just trying to show that he's like, I'm a real boy!
This is serious!
And it was just like... I actually... Lord knows if his account got suspended or whatever, but at one point I DM'd him and I was like, look man, let's be totally off the record.
Just tell me your grift.
Just tell me the scam you're running.
I won't tell anyone, I swear.
I just want to know how cognizant you are that what you're doing is a fraud.
And he never got back to me because he didn't want to say that.
Anybody in the year 2024 or at least the first half of 2024 that wanted us to be convinced that they're a time traveler is obviously full of shit because all it would have taken was that it just be like you know the USA is gonna beat Pakistan in cricket right?
That's not a thing.
Shut up.
What are you talking about?
That's a literal madness.
We don't even have a team that's like professionals that do that professionally.
That would be like a sports almanac thing to prove that you were from the future for this year.
Right, exactly.
God.
Speaking of griffs, I have to bring up one more thing that was at the People's Convention.
They were hawking this anti-woke water.
Oh dude, I've seen this.
Somebody I know, I think it was Internet Today or whatever, talked about this.
Hilarious.
Because I saw Anti-Woke Water when I went to AmericaFest last year and it was like woke tears water.
This was Freedom 2.0 and it was being hawked by Alex Clark who lives in Arizona and she's like the lead Woman for Turning Point USA influencer.
She does like several podcasts for them and hosts their women's conference and she's just a big figure in that scene.
The Gripers actually called her out by name during Nick's speech because they've had beef with her for years because they mixed her up with another woman who has a black son so they have beef with her by means of being confused.
Um, the best part of that story was Amanda's knowing nod when he found that road.
I mean, it was like, ah, yes, this nonsense.
Yes.
It's better and better.
So it's just like, Okay, well yeah, they called her out, like Nick called her out during his speech at this, whatever you want to call it, not AFPAC, like AFPAC 3.5 or whatever we're calling it.
They said they're going to have a 4, a real 4, somewhere else.
So I don't know what we're calling this speech.
Well, when we were there, he was like, I look around and I see AfPak 4 right here.
So now when Grapers are like, they're also confused because they think that I got AfPak cancelled.
I didn't.
I just got the VIP dinner cancelled.
Which again, the hotel is really denying, even though I have audio saying otherwise.
But they keep saying, you got it cancelled.
You weren't there.
And I'm like, Nick said I was there.
He called it AfPak 4.
So maybe I'll call it AfPak 4.5.
Maybe it'll be one of the speakers this time, you know?
I like Street Corner Aft Path, but I don't think it's catchy enough.
I love the Woke Water, the commercial for the Woke Water, at least the clip of it that I saw, was what would just be like, why not have even your water make a statement when you're drinking it?
It's just like, oh god.
You people just really want to be fighting the culture war literally at all times.
You're not even allowed to drink a sip of water without letting people know that you ate the woke.
Just don't ever expect to define what the woke is.
The woke is like a vibe.
I got a bottle of water at CPAC 2021.
It wasn't local.
I'd have to go check what it was, because I've never opened it or anything.
I kept it.
Did it confirm your biological sex when you drank it?
Were you like, yeah, I feel empowered to know exactly that there's two genders only?
Well, this was before trans stuff.
This was CRT, so it probably would have been CRT related.
I don't remember what it was, but they had some giving.
I was just at some militia event in Oregon, some Bundy thing a couple of weeks ago.
I went from that to Turning Point.
Um, and there was a woman who was speaking and she was like, Trump has really let me down over and over.
And he's disappointed in me, but you know what?
I look around, but he's also done a lot of good things.
And I look around, and I just know all of us being here makes the left really mad, and that's really what it's all about!
And I'm like, bro, bro, you're not supposed to say that out loud!
I'm like, what?
What an idiot.
What an authentic experience.
I'm so glad that you get to have that.
Just somebody, just like, the veil completely off, and just like, God, Donald Trump sucks, but...
I don't know, I just fucking hate people with lefty ideology, and all I really care about is seeing them angry, so... Here we are.
Just like, world-weary.
Bags under their eyes, so tired.
Drinking their fucking woke 2-0, or anti-woke 2-0, or whatever it is.
Just being like, why not even having your water make a statement, am I right?
Like, sobbing.
I wish my kids would call me.
Okay, one more thing with the H2O thing, too.
This lady's also hawking a shirt, this Alex Clark lady.
It's a crop top because she she's a big Promoter of the raw milk movement unpasteurized milk
And she's selling a crop top that went kind of viral too because it says got raw milk on it
And the cow photo is not of a cow but of a bull I love it people keep making that mistake
I know, it's like not hard.
It's like, dude, I feel like when you're like a little kid, somebody tells you, oh, the ones with horns are boys.
And that's pretty much true for like all those hoofed animals.
You know, you don't really have to, you're just like, oh shit, majestic deer.
Like, does it have big fucking gnarly horns?
Dude, that's a male deer.
I'm going to stay away from that.
Fuck that.
Like, you know?
So dumb.
Can you explain what's on the animal where your milk came from?
Yeah, right.
She's like, my favorite part about the raw milk moment is getting it straight from the single tap on the cow.
Because the cows are famous for that.
For only having one udder.
One long udder.
That's it.
Well, all that footage of those guys sitting in front of those four things, it's fucking GMO shit.
You know, that's not how nature did it.
Pure, one teat cow.
You know it.
I know it.
The horns let you know it.
Yeah.
Oh my god.
We need that, like, what was it, that Jordan Peterson, where the... Yeah, the Come Mill King's Chinese farm.
Yeah, yeah.
We need to give that on a shirt to Alex Clark.
Alex, we bought you a farm.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yikes.
Again, I'm still just absolutely flabbergasted people keep making that mistake.
That was a Dumb and Dumber joke like 30 years ago when that movie came out, remember?
So stupid.
That was like, uh, I think like Laura Bush made that joke about her husband a million years ago.
Oh my god.
Be careful with that joke.
It's an antique.
Nice shirt, idiot.
I know I'm feeling owned.
As part of the woke, I look at it and I'm just like, oh, I'm so owned.
You're like sucking cow tick.
I want that shirt now.
I kind of do, too.
After Media Matters went about it, they changed it, I think.
But I want the OG shirt.
Where are the t-shirt bots?
Where are the t-shirt bots?
I'm just going to make one, like, customly.
I don't want a crop top, so yeah, it might be the right way to do it.
Because, yeah, that would be so fucking funny to wear that, I think.
The aspect 4.5.
That would be a fuckin' incredible logo for like a punk band called Raw Milk.
Just like a big bull. That idea is for free anybody out there who's musically inclined.
Get your fuckin' punk band together.
Their name is Raw Milk and their logo is a big strappin' bull.
And they're here to fuckin' shred.
Alright, on that note, do we want to move into our mailbag for the week?
That sounds like a plan.
Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
It's time for Q and A. Cleodora Silvestri, the Hellworld's Grand Inquisitor asks, if perjury trader Greed made good on her hollow promise to leave the country when Trump goes to jail, is there a single country that would want a MAGA conspiracy pill insurrectionist stirring nutbag?
Russia would love her.
North Korea would love a blonde Caucasian.
Bring her right over.
We'll put her in movies immediately, whether she wants to be in them or not.
Yes.
Hungry.
Oh, Orban would love her.
Oh God, yeah, Victor Orban and Marjorie.
They'd be a power couple.
Think of right-wing authoritarian strongman countries, and they'll take her.
Yeah.
If there's anybody living on Sealand, I'm sure they'd be happy for somebody to talk to.
Just anybody to talk to.
I mean, I think that place only supports three people, typically.
Ah, the Sealand deep cut.
I love Sealand.
Last I checked it on Sealand it was still for sale.
I don't know if anybody bought it, but my god, the dream.
Oh man, Libertarian Paradise, that's what it's all about.
Yeah, I think Marjorie would, I think she should never pick up the litter when it came to just like shitty anti-American countries that would want her on the payroll.
Cause she could do the whole thing where I didn't turn my back on America, America turned its back on me!
Gettin' all woke and argle-bargle and jailing the god-emperor and oh man.
I mean, it's like how everyone was just like, Edward Snowden, you're the greatest!
And now Edward Snowden's in Russia being like, you know, maybe Ukraine should surrender.
And it's like, Edward, no!
Edward, no!
Don't do that!
But you kind of have to, because now you're under Putin's arm.
And if you don't, you go to the gulag.
I understand.
So, yeah.
Where you die peacefully of a heart attack while walking along the lake, according to our Russian corridors and stuff.
And then you'll get the body.
We're done with it.
Shut up.
Yeah, exactly.
We have to find a suitable heart that looks like it died of a heart attack that we can put in this kid before we send
him away.
Yeah.
Yeah. So thank you for the question.
Eric the Deep State Operative asks, if someone were to adopt QAnon into a teen high school drama, what archetypes would various influencers take on?
The thing about that is, you kind of have to go outside of QAnon to get to the womanizer and the Lothario character, because none of those guys have any res.
I feel like the Future Q guy would be their Poochie, right?
He'd be the guy that jumps the shark when he shows up.
He's their The Great Kazoo.
Because all the audience is like, we hate this guy.
We hate Future Q. He sucks.
Yeah, Steinbart is Scrappy-Doo.
Oh God, he's the scrappiest Scrappy-Doo of them all.
The problem is they're basically all shaggies.
They're all just like dorks.
They're all just so desperate.
But none of them would admit that.
You know who your swarthy, Fonzie, Lothario type would be?
It would be like Miles Strong.
Nobody would tell him, that's crazy.
They'd just be like, you're not that guy.
He'd be like, no, I am this guy.
He's like, no you're not.
He's like, no I am.
And they're like, oh god, this show's taking so hard.
This show's so bad.
I feel like the women would do pretty better, which is good wording on my part.
I do think they would be better because they would play into those archetypes a lot.
Those dramas are all about cattiness and betrayal and backstabbing and stupid and stuff.
I feel like the women in cue-adjacent movements, they'd be sort of about that life.
Liz is a popular girl, probably.
She's got the popular girl energy.
She was part of celebrity culture a little bit.
And that's the thing.
Also, the QAnon grifter, their demographics are 9 to 1 male, and that probably is low.
So it's like, if you're a woman in that movement, you're just a queen.
You have so many people that are trying to get your attention, and they're so desperate for you.
So it's like Lisa May, The Kate Awakening, Sarah Ruth Ashcroft, who's fallen off the earth, and I hope she got mental health treatment because she was absolutely not well.
But you just have those people, those women, and for every one of them you have like 50 QAnon promoters who are just, I'm trying to make it in this world!
Buy my coffee!
Drink raw milk!
The raw milk thing is now getting super big in QAnon.
It's just wild that this childish defiance of everything is now so popular.
Good, I hope they poop their brains out.
Literally, I hope they poop so hard that they die because they just refuse to pass Rance Milk.
Because it would be less people to look at, like, you know, to look at women and just be like, you're ugly, no matter what they look like.
That's another thing these goobers have in common.
I keep seeing that now that I'm back on Twitter.
Like, people will be posting these thirst trap photos, and it'll just be like, ah, yet another attractive woman, because there's a ton of those on X. But then you have these fucking, like, blue check losers who are just like, meh!
Boo.
Hiss.
You don't look like whatever I picture the ideal woman to look like.
Fat.
Ugly.
7 out of 10.
Mid.
None of y'all are fucking.
None of y'all.
You're all the worst.
Shut up.
I'm the ugliest woman in the world, they say.
But then I also trick their friends into giving me all their secrets.
And now when I'm sitting in front of the bar, whenever they see me, they see me all the time because I go to their shit.
They'll be like, Oh, she has chlamydia.
Oh, she has sex with everybody.
And it's like, well, what is it?
Am I the ugliest woman that's ever existed?
Or are all of your friends... Do you all fuck me because I'm so hot?
Yeah, I don't understand what's going on here.
And also, how many of those dudes are like, like seeing you from the back and like going to approach you before one of their boys is just like, no, no, no.
You need to know the score on that one.
Probably all of them.
It's like, fine, you're mid anyway!
And then like people were coming up and they were being like don't talk to her
Do you know who she is?
And like one of the guys was like, who are you and I was like, I'm the reason your VIP dinner wasn't at ash
Bar tonight. It's like fine. You're mid anyway, so bid no fucking bitch and then 20 minutes later
He's like, did you want to come back to my hotel room with me?
And then what happened after you went back to his hotel room
Right.
Then I fucking punched him in the face like he was Sneako.
That would be great!
Can you imagine?
Yeah!
Then I let him take me back to his hotel room when no one was watching.
I fucked him up!
Not in the way he expected.
Yeah.
That'd be great.
Can you imagine?
Because what are they going to do?
Admit that?
Who are they going to tell their boys?
They're going to be like, yeah, I brought this woman back to my hotel.
Then she fucking just...
She beat me up really badly.
How did I do that?
She didn't use a weapon or anything.
She just fuckin' wham bam like Ronda Rousey and then just left.
The main reason why I'm laughing about that, beyond the fact that it's awesome, is just that that was like one of the kind of dangers of Vegas when I was living out there, is what they called getting trick-rolled.
Usually, what would be, it would be the prostitutes would just roofie you and knock you out and steal all your shit.
So that's just like a huge, that was like a danger, like every now and then.
My boyfriend's got nothing to steal, I'll tell you that.
I'll tell you that.
Like, that was the thing, like, I would say, like, I was in Vegas for, like, five years.
I would say, like, I heard, like, seven different guys, like, talk about that story in the poker room one day, where they were like, yeah, like, either they or their friend, like, came into town, like, Had a few drinks, was kind of tipsy.
Then they get approached by a woman.
They think that's a good idea.
And then they take the woman back to their room.
And the next thing they know, they wake up, no wallet, nothing.
Just totally annihilated.
And because you solicited a prostitute, that's fucking illegal.
You have no recourse.
So you're just totally screwed.
So it's just like... If I'm properly reading between the lines here, Mike, I believe you've been roofied at least seven times.
Dammit, what are these nights I'm going to get laid?
When is this going to work out?
Why?
Why does this keep happening to me?
Yes, you nailed it.
Joke's on you.
I only brought Monopoly, buddy.
Actually, the funniest thing was when I worked at the Tropicana in Vegas, the elevator that would take you to the casino floor was literally on the exact opposite side of where the poker room was.
So you had two options.
Put on your name tag and have customers bug you as you're trying to walk to the poker room.
Or, don't wear your name tag and get endlessly solicited by prostitutes.
And I always chose the latter.
And I was, I was the handsomest boy in the world.
One time I got solicited like six times before I got to the program.
Just every like, every like hundred feet, hey baby, what you doing?
And then just keep walking.
And then like, hey sugar, what's going on?
It's just like, my God.
Hell yeah.
Dude, that does sound like a bonus.
That's like a feature.
The ego stroke on your way to work.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's just like, when I was at the Trop, they did not care about the prostitutes.
They did not care.
They were just like, yeah, they get free run of the casino floor.
If they want to talk to our customers, they're allowed.
And if this was a sitcom, you would get the funny, like, gradual, like, slide into you doing, you know, it's like the second or third season, you wake up, put your shit on, you, like, tuck your nape tag in your pocket, you're walking through the, One of the prostitutes pulled well so now she's a recurring character.
She's gone from a bit role to a larger role in the show.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, exactly.
One of the prostitutes pulled well, so now she's a recurring character.
She's gone from a bit role to a larger role in the show.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, you're like, oh, hey, how's your classes going?
She's like, oh, I'm up at Scratchwood.
She's like, oh, shit, do we got to do something special?
It's just super wholesome and fun.
But everybody on the same page, you will not be paying any of them for sex.
And they will not be sexing you for free.
Yeah, that's exactly right.
This is the way.
And finally, DJ Jugi asks, Coke or Pepsi?
Coke.
Coke, says Haley.
Yeah, I mean, I think it's gotta be Coke, right?
Coke, yeah.
Pepsi's disgusting.
We should burn the factory to the ground.
See, I'm not about that.
Atlanta's revenge!
That's what it is.
Avocadosaur of mini-colas.
Well, you know, less now that I don't do the sugar stuff.
Like, I always thought Pepsi was fine.
I didn't have a problem with it.
But I did grow up in the South, where literally all soda was just called Coca-Cola.
So it's like, it would be tough for me to betray my roots and say anything other than Coke in the matchup between the two of them, the headset matchup.
Also, I believe Dr. Pepper may have surplused Pepsi as the number two brand in the country.
Dr. Pepper is actually, I don't drink soda unless I'm extremely hungover.
It's like twice a year I'll drink soda.
Dr. Pepper is the only really good soda.
Dr. Pepper is, it's a pretty different experience.
It does still have that, like, it has a little bit of that medicinal quality to it, because that's its, like, original origins, like a lot of them are.
But, yeah, there's something special.
I was disappointed when I lived near the Waco area, I never got to go to the Dr. Pepper plant, because apparently they've got that good original brew shit that they only serve at the plant, like the original, like, fucking recipe of the 23 flavors or whatever it is.
Probably can't get the same at Coca-Cola's factory.
They're probably not.
They're just like, here's your cocaine beverage.
I've been to the big Coke thing in Atlanta.
You definitely cannot get that.
Very sad.
Bummer.
See, wow.
You're making me, as somebody who was literally born in that state, you are making me feel very bad about having not been to that precious place.
I went to college in Atlanta for about a month before I decided both college and Atlanta were not for me.
So.
Hell yeah.
Yeah.
It was like one of the few things I did while I was there.
Fair enough.
I mean, for a long time, it was one of the few things to do in Atlanta.
Atlanta, over the past 20 years, has... Yeah, this was about 20 years ago.
I mean, I was 06.
Yeah, there we go.
In the past 20 years, it got a food scene that I guess was good that has got kind of bad recently because they're all at their own butts.
Keith Lee went there and destroyed them.
He destroyed them!
Anyway, sorry.
Coke.
When I was a kid, I was all Pepsi all the time.
I never really drank Coke.
That was just my family, and then I got into A&W Root Beer and Sprite, and now I'm already a large enough boy as it is, and soda would probably kill me, so I just drink water and sparkling water.
Also, wow, dude, we get it.
You're not from the South.
You graduated from Pepsi to A&W.
Yeah, I know.
We get it.
You live north of the Mason-Dixon.
Calm down.
Yes!
That's me.
That combination of words would never happen in the South.
Old Yankee migraines.
If you were, like, doing a dalliance with Pepsi, it was like, yeah, I started drinking Pepsi, then I went back to Coke, motherfucker.
Honestly, though, like, you know what launched right when I was a kid, like, right before I left Massachusetts?
Georgia.
When I left Georgia, never to be seen again, was Fruitopia.
So when I think of my home state, I think of Fruitopia.
I remember OK Soda.
And then I remember people home-brewing OK Soda with the Sprite.
I think it was either Sprite and the Hi-C Orange, or Coke and the Hi-C Orange from the fountains at McDonald's.
Because I just remember that being the way to get OK Soda after they discontinued it.
Fucking lunatics.
Just let it go.
I didn't go to the lab to start tinkering to find out what they made Fruitopia out of once Fruitopia was discontinued.
I was just like, oh bummer, Fruitopia's gone.
So I had to go Crystal Tab and Crystal Pepsi when everybody, when the fan was trying to make everything crystal.
See-through is better, you know, because the stupid American consumer market perceived see-through with healthier.
That was the whole reason for all of that horse shit.
Yeah, see, I truly would rather talk about anything else than politics.
I'm always going on the weirdest, stupidest tangents.
Sorry.
So, what is everyone looking forward to?
I'm doing a movie night with some pals today.
What a fun way to beat the heat is to sit inside a place that's air-conditioned.
My friend proposed to me a pretty funny spread.
She was like, hey, we can watch Practical Magic.
Or... Oh my god, it's on the tip of my tongue and I can't fucking remember what it was.
It's like Escape from New York or something crazy like that.
Which really undercuts my anecdote.
But yeah, she just gave me this crazy spread.
It was like one wholesome, practical magic, completely milquetoast thing.
And the other one was some bombastic, grimy action movie.
Roadhouse!
That was it.
It was Roadhouse.
Yeah.
So I'll be watching either Practical Magic or Roadhouse tonight.
And that'll be fun.
That sounds good.
Hayley, what are you looking forward to?
I've been playing Animal Crossing again, because it's the only thing that's relieving me of any stress, because it's basically a baby game for babies.
It's nice, so I'm looking forward to just chopping some trees, catching some bees, you know what I'm saying?
Chopping trees and catching bees.
And he's all about that Animal Crossing life.
My Animal Crossing Island is dead to me because I can't bring myself to load up the game to see what sort of starting state it's in.
Oh yeah.
I haven't played since, like, it came out.
It was, like, those handy, like, first, like, few weeks of the panda where we're all going crazy.
And Animal Crossing just happened to come out at the exact perfect time.
So everyone on Earth was playing that game for the first few weeks, including me.
And then I got bored and wandered off of it.
I have like a whole island of digital critters that are overgrown with weeds.
They're probably pretty sad and passive-aggressive.
If I ever load it up, they're gonna be like, oh, look who's here.
Shut up.
Don't back talk me.
Be grateful I'm playing this game again.
I'll delete you, motherfucker.
I'll eat your whole existence.
What are you looking forward to, Amanda?
My birthday party's on Saturday.
Oh, cool.
Oh, hell yeah!
Happy birthday!
It was like two weeks ago, but I saw that documentary and the PNW and then I was in Detroit for that Nazi rally, so... Nice.
I get it.
My birthday was also about two weeks ago.
Some of these would be cool people born in June.
Very true.
Yeah, this podcast, no one in my work listens to this podcast, but we're having a surprise birthday party for somebody tomorrow, so that'll be fun.
I'm intending that.
But also, the Celtics won the sports ball championship for basketballs, so that was exciting.
Are you going to scorch your dick off in a Friday parade?
Yeah, it's really funny that like literally all sports ball championships end at the wrong time.
Because when the Patriots win this rule, you get to freeze to death in the February winter.
And when the Celtics win the title, you get to literally die of heat stroke celebrating in Boston.
Hey, there's a chance that the heat might break and you guys will have like a crazy ripping thunderstorm instead.
You know, don't worry, believe in yourself.
Those are your options.
90 degrees plus or ripping thunderstorm that breaks the heat.
Oh, literally yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and who knows how long, the weather has decided.
Guess what, folks?
It's summer, and it's oppressive murder summer.
I went outside today.
I was swimming.
The humidity was 103%, and it is hot.
It is muggy, hot, shitty, awful.
If you go to that Championship Parade, you are out of your goddamn mind.
Just watch YouTube videos of highlights and feel happy inside.
You do not need to celebrate by needing to chug a gallon of water every hour, or else your body might shut down.
Yeah, my area also hot, and hot enough where I was not looking forward to having to go to the dispensary.
But thankfully, I believe I have secured myself a nice little ride to make sure I don't have to walk.
Normally, Love the walk.
Grab a smoothie.
Hang out.
Chill.
Taking the local color.
I fuck or I fuck.
No, that's the wrong word.
I pet some dogs.
Like just, you know, just check out a lot of the cool dogs at the dog park.
Love that stuff.
But not when it's balls hot outside.
So I'm happy to have a ride secured.
And I'm happy for you, Mike, because I know that you're a big sports ball fan and I'm happy that the Celtics took it down.
I know that some people were just like, oh my god, is Dallas going to secretly come back and rally and destroy the Celtics?
And everybody was drooling over the possibility because they all hate Boston sports fans, and as well they should.
End of statement.
Okay, so thanks for listening to the Adventures of Helwar Podcast.
Another successful show.
Well done, all of us, including our wonderful guest, Amanda.
And thank you, our listener, for supporting us with your ears.
If you want to support us even harder, you can do so by giving us a five-star review wherever you get your podcasts from.
If you want to give us any of your money, Lord knows that we will take it.
Visit us at Patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
In exchange for $5 or more per month, you will get access to all of our bonus content.
So if you just can't get enough of us knuckleheads, you can go ahead and get 50, 60 extra hours worth of content up at Patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, we totally understand.
Lots of ways you can do good with it in the world, but the one we always suggest is love146.org, an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
Thanks as always to DJ Minimal Effort for the use of our original intro song, remixed accidentally by Matt Grains into what you heard at the top of the show.
Thanks to our buddy Frosty for all of our voiceover work when we need it.
You can find Frosty on BlueSky at FrostyVO.
You can find the show that you're listening to, that's right, The Adventures of Hellworld, on Twitter, aka X at Hellworld with a Q instead of an O.
You can find me, technically, on Twitter, at hellworldfatty, spelled the same way as the show, but all I do is talk about pop culture shit, so if you're here for the politics, avoid me!
Otherwise, come listen to my hot takes.
They're fucking hot, but they are accurate.
You can find Mike Rades, of course, on various social media at PokerPolitics, Hayley, various social media at Arizona Right Watch, aka AZRW.
And thanks especially to Amanda for being our wonderful guest host in the chair this week.
Amanda, where can people find you on social media?
I don't want to misspeak.
I'm at NoTurtleSoup17 on every platform.
Twitter, Gas League Threads, Blue Sky, Instagram, all of it.
And then I've got a substack at turtlediaries.net.
Nice.
And I'm assuming the substack is the best way to support you if people would like to do so?
Yeah.
Yes.
Rock on.
So yeah, there you go.
Use that information as you will.
And thanks again to Amanda for chilling with us and talking to us about all the craziness.
R.E.
Sneeko getting rocket punched in the face.
It was good that it wasn't just like a regular punch either.
It's literally diving punch.
I mean, if you haven't seen the clip, really, go in there and check it out.
Anyway, so that's going to do it for another successful episode of the Official Howl World Podcast.
Once again, I have been one of your hosts, The Mysterious L. Joined, of course, by my co-host Haley, a.k.a.
Arizona Right Watch.
Mike Rains, aka Poker Politics, and this week's special guest host, Amanda, aka... I don't want to get it wrong.
The Brown Turtle?
I'm a moron.
Sorry.
That's my bad.
We already went over this.
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