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Jan. 11, 2024 - Adventures in HellwQrld
01:32:14
Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #172: The Illuminati and Hunter Biden

This week we cover Taylor Swift and Katt Williams and how they fit into the Illuminati. We then talk about Hunter Biden crushing the GOP committee that was out to get him and the latest and greatest madness from Trump. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
Listener discretion advised.
Hello, everybody.
I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
This week, I am joined, as always, with Haley, a.k.a.
Arizona Right Watch.
Hello, everybody.
The 12 Days of Christmas is over, so it's now just ordinary time until we reach Eastertide, so just hi.
Yes.
In the mysterious hell.
How do you do, fellow babies?
It's me.
Fellow Baby L, totally young, just like you.
Yes.
Certainly not shocked about my age today after seeing somebody just be like, hey, remember when they remade that Legend of Zelda game for the 3DS?
And she's like, oh, yeah, I remember that.
And they're just like, yeah, like that game came out as long ago as the original one had come out when that was remaking it.
And I was like, no, no, that can't be true!
That's impossible!
I like that our generation, I don't, I don't know what happened to previous generations, but I think like social media has created this thing where we get to get attacked by how old we are constantly.
Just like, I don't, I don't feel like previous generations had as many signposts of you are now very old, just hitting them over the head over and over and over again.
Well, like, I'm fairly old.
I'm an Elder Millennial.
up, Hey, remember this thing?
That was a long time ago.
And you're just like, no, why was it so long ago?
That's so bad.
Well, like I'm fairly old.
I'm an elder millennial and you are older than I, I'm not sure.
Are you still technically an elder millennial or are you like an
incredibly late generation Xer?
I saw a thing where I'm an Xennial.
I'm what they also call the Oregon trail generation.
Cause I'm the generation of people that was playing Oregon trail in school.
I played that too.
That's just because your school was poor, Hayley.
That is so accurate!
That is so true.
That's so true.
You got me.
That was actually supposed to be a joke, although I figured there was a chance it was true, because based on just, I don't know, the way you look visually, looking at you with my eyes, it seems like you're younger than the two old fucks you co-host with.
So I was just like, I don't know!
Because Oregon Trail was a little old in the tooth when I was playing it in school.
I loved it so much as a kid though!
It was great!
Oregon Trail, Math Blaster, and all those classic big floppy games, they were just so good.
But yeah, so our generation sort of like weird, you know, grew up no internet at all.
I mean it technically existed, but it wasn't for us.
And then both of us getting to transition fully into internet age, like now the sum of all mankind's knowledge in the hand of our fucking Like, in the palm of our hand, all the time.
And, on top of that, we also had the fuckin' Pan- the Pando gap years!
Like, so, my time is all fucked, dude.
Like, when I look, like, I'm not even 40 yet, and when I look into the rear view, it's just like, anything that happened more than two years ago happened within five years ago.
Anything that happened more than five years ago happened within ten years ago.
And sometimes I still get that wrong.
I'll be like, oh yeah, that thing was like, like, like, I'll be like, oh yeah, Scott Pilgrim, that thing came out like ten years ago.
And they're just like, no, dude, that thing came out like fifteen or twenty years ago!
You fuckin' bad old cow!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Yes.
Yeah, exactly.
I mean, that's just, yeah, that's the thing.
But I just see so many people posting stuff where they're like, remember when this happened?
Compare this to this time reference.
It's just as old.
The distance is equal between these two things.
And then you're just like, that can't be true.
That's ridiculous.
Oh, God, I'm so old.
And Like, uh, like there was like a wrestler, this, uh, this woman who's like now getting on TV and she's like talking about who inspired her to be a wrestler.
And she named someone who was like, just got hot, like recently.
And then you're like, Oh, right.
She is 22 years old.
So when she was a kid, that person was someone she looked up to.
Oh God, I'm a hundred.
I'm literally a hundred years old.
This is, this is terrible.
This is so bad.
Like, Yeah.
And, you know, that's fine.
I'm not upset transitioning into being an old.
Because, first of all, my body has felt old for a little while.
But, like, my spirit still feels young.
So, in that way, I've just always been old.
That's all that matters.
Uh, no.
I mean, the body does matter, too.
Like, if I were to go to concerts, the body matters a lot.
Like, unless I show up in a rascal scooter or something, like, my body's gonna hurt.
My body's gonna be in a rough way, like halfway through that show.
But one of the things I wish that the fuckers who were old before us, because you know, old fucks before us will tell you things.
They'll be like, dude, like pretty much the second you hit 30, that's when you'll start to notice your body giving out.
And they'll be like, yeah, you'll start to lose sense of how long ago things were and like this and that.
So you prepare for a lot of stuff.
I don't think anybody ever sat me down and like had a talk to me about how you get like weird old people face blindness where like when I look at like celebrities or whatever just people that I see on the screen that are anywhere between the ages of like 28 and you know like my age i'm just like oh we're all like peers or whatever but like 28 is a big difference like the people that are 28 are like not really my peers like those people are 10 years younger than me but in my head everybody's 35 myself included we're all 35 baby dude everyone's 35 and anyone that doesn't ping to me as 35 either pings to me as 50 plus or like 20 minus and like those are the age categories now it's like nobody sat down there just like hey
Like, once you hit a certain age, you are going to start thinking about the people that you see in terms of, like, their television demographic.
But not because you're looking for ratings, just because it will be easier than pinning down their real age.
They'll be like, oh, sweet, yeah, like, uh, yeah, my buddy's got some young friends, they're all 18 to 24, whatever.
I've said shit like that.
Like, when some of my buddies, when they were, like, going to college late in life, I'd be like, yeah, some of their friends are a little young, they're, like, 18 to 24.
That's a fucking TV age demo!
My money was associated with too many people who were females between the age of 18 to 24.
And I'm only using that word in that way because that's how a TV demographic would say it.
Anyway.
Getting old, that's great.
I feel so wise.
Like, I remember, like, growing up when I'd be watching football with my mom, my mom would constantly be pointing out, like, rookie players and being like, wow, he's so young.
And I just, like, couldn't wrap my head around that.
And now, like, that's just something that happens with, like, all, like, young athletes, which is like, yeah, that's a kid.
That's like a kid now playing an adult's game, and in a couple years, he'll be adultified.
But at this moment, that does look like a child pretending to be a Boston Bruin.
Oh yeah, King James, our boy LeBron, he has been 35 to me since he was 18.
Yes!
He just had the physiology of somebody that my bro was just like, oh, just a full-grown adult man.
Probably like early 30s, maybe 35.
Yeah, he was like 18 when he started.
He's fucking my age now!
Yes!
He's just better than me across the board, like in all ways.
Yes, so funny.
Oh man, that's like super funny because Tom Brady's my age, so it's like you just have this person who's just crushed you in every imaginable way to just remind you, here's what you could have done at your age if only you were excellent, but no, you decided to fail instead.
Yeah, I made a post about it, I can't remember if I tweeted about it back before I abandoned that platform or whatever, but like, I'm, like, fatter and less well-off and older than Homer Simpson is supposed to be.
I'm way more than he does in his established weight.
I am definitely older than he is, because I believe he is supposed to be between the ages of 34 and 36 or whatever.
And yeah, like, his poverty was owning a three-bedroom house with, like, a garage for his two cars.
That was how poor they were.
That's an impossible dream for my generation.
And Marge would stay at home.
Marge only worked occasionally in certain episodes.
Absolutely not, no.
And they would complain about money, but they seemed like they were doing just fine.
Even when I was watching them when I was a kid, I was just like, I knew that the Simpsons were less poor than I was.
I was just like, I am poorer than they are.
They're making funny jokes about their income level, but I have less than them by a lot.
But now I'm older and fatter than Homer was, and I'm just like, dude, I don't really feel like Homer Simpson.
Like, I mean, granted, like, you know, I'm old and fat, but like, I don't know, man.
You need three kids.
I guess.
Three unaging children.
Yep.
And myself to be unaging was stuck in that form, like if somebody turned me into a vampire right now.
I'm like, ah, beans.
I'd be like, look, the vampire thing is maybe enough incentive.
Give me 12 months to, like, tone it up at least a little and then come back so it can be at least a little hot for, like, my eternity.
And that's going to be the name of my spicy romance novel, A Little Hot for My Eternity, by Mysterious Novel.
Hey, you can have the AI, the Chat GP, back that out for you in like two hours.
We can put it on a website and start cranking out the money.
Yeah, but then I'd have to give it away.
Because that's where my line is on the AI thing.
I'll fuck around with AI all I want if I'm not making any money off of it, and fuck you.
Because, what are you going to do about it?
Fight me?
But, I'm not trying to make any money off of that stuff.
That is stealing.
But, also, like, a lot of these people, GoldPost moves a lot when it comes to, like, what is okay to steal.
They're just like, yeah, you're not pirating anything there, bud.
But, that's a conversation for never, because they'd kill me.
I'd die.
I'd never be able to work in this town again.
So, let's move on to our amuse-a-bouche.
It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
Get ready for the amuse-bouche.
We did it!
We waited long enough, and the Illuminati is back.
Dude, yeah, the Illuminati's back in a big way.
What a great week for the Illuminati.
And I never thought that I'd be getting to it from this angle, but I guess I should have, because I've never heard very many interviews with one Cat Williams, who you might recognize as a professional stand-up comedian who got famous.
Many years ago for his pimp routine, which is exactly what it was.
It sounds crazy.
Anyway, but yeah, like he had a crazy barn burning, like two hour, 40 minute interview where he spilled a lot of tea.
But the craziest thing he said was Illuminati related.
And I hope Mike did his research because I'm about to toss it to Mike.
Mike, he's the Alex Oop!
So, Kat told Shannon Sharpe, the interviewer here, that he and Ludacris were basically brought into a room by the Illuminati, and they were told that one of them was going to get the part of being a multi-trillionaire, movie star, awesome person.
Well, obviously I'd go with Ludacris out of those two.
Well, I'm going to jump in right here, because this is one of the few things that I did actually read about ahead of time, because I didn't know we were going to be talking about it on the podcast.
I heard this, and then I was like, we should talk about it.
Yeah.
Cat Williams had a concrete figure.
He said, they sat us down, they were just like, we're gonna make one, we're gonna give one of you $200 million and a
weird looking wife.
Which I thought was just the craziest part of the whole thing.
Was I mean, because again, Cat Lloyd is a professional comedian, but the fact that he's just like,
he had to go out of his way to say that all the the wives that allegedly the Illuminati pair with these black actors
that they elevate to superstardom.
They all have weird-looking faces.
It's so weird.
He's just like, all these women have weird-looking faces that never do any interviews.
You have no idea who they are.
You don't know what they think.
Like, they're just weird-looking, trophy white ladies for these guys.
I was just like, damn, Kat Williams, you're savage!
It sounds like you are the expert on this subject this time around.
Yes.
But I usually give it to Mike, because that is his job.
Yeah.
Also, I didn't bother to remember the guy's name that was interviewing.
Who the fuck cares?
Well, Shannon Sharpe's now like a media presence, so he's getting time.
I couldn't pull it off the top of my dome, and I didn't want to get it wrong out of racism and my white guilt, so I was just like, I'll let Mike deal with this one.
I completely forgot about the weird looking wives thing.
I did, I did remember like the 200 million because, and Cat Williams, uh, like his justification for that claim was that the Fast and Furious franchise is now on like episode 10.
And so eventually they're going to get to enough movies where Ludacris will have been in 20 of them and will have received a hundred, 10 million for each of them.
And I mean, certainly the Illuminati is lining his pockets in ways other than just his movie career.
Right.
Yeah, you would have to say Ludacris is still a successful rapper.
As far as I know, Ludacris still has a rap career.
Right.
I just love the idea that... I just want to know, can Kat name the people that put him in that room and told him this?
Hillary Clinton.
Hillary Clinton should definitely be one of them.
I mean, it's... I'm sure that he would probably just say some white person with a briefcase or whatever, you know?
Or maybe even spookier, some white person in some Illuminati robes.
Or wearing like a signet ring or something.
So that way you know he's not just like a fucking corpo.
Like he's an Illuminati corpo.
But I want the devil in the room.
I want Lucifer Morningstar wearing a ridiculously well-dressed, well-tailored suit in the room actually talking to you as this is going on.
I want that level of power being involved.
Because I see these stories all the time from people where they're just like, this guy sold his soul to the Illuminati.
And I'm like, how?
Explain this process to me, because I want to know how this works.
Morpheus?
Right!
I want big-time people involved.
I need supernatural deities in the room with me working on this stuff.
Because some guy sold his podcast to Barstool Sports for hundreds of millions of dollars.
And then like three years later, his son was tragically killed by gun violence.
And they were just like, when this guy signed the contract, he knew he was sacrificing his son.
And it's like, really?
David Portnoy is the Illuminati now?
Barstool Sports?
How else can you explain him getting so popular for just standing in front of a place and just being like, oh, this pizza's like a 775.
Oh, it's a pretty good pizza!
Like, okay, cool.
Also pizza, Mike.
Come on.
Pizza.
Come on.
Obviously, obviously.
Don't get me wrong, I'm only hating because I'm jealous.
He's throwing it in your face.
Yeah.
I think his favorite pizza is just plain cheese pizza, he says, winking at the camera, while sticking his tongue out, ready to receive the pizza, you know?
Mmm, pizza!
Yeah, insane stuff.
And it also just happens to look really good for Cat Williams in that story, where he was just like, back before Ludacris became a household name, as like a multi-discipline, like, just superstar, I was in the same room with him.
And somebody was just like, you know what, Cat Williams, you're exactly just like Ludacris in terms of your ability to generate profit and marketability.
And what we would super love is to make one of you, it's so close, we're pretty much just going to flip a coin.
We just want to let you know how great the both of you are.
It just went to Ludacris.
Yeah, it's so strange.
So strange that Luda got the win there.
It was such an evenly fought contest between two equal combatants.
And just on that day, Ludacris was just slightly the better man to gain Illuminati acceptance.
Uh, so, to my TikTok surprise, I have seen several videos from people who, uh, believe all of the shit that Kat Williams is saying.
Like, just literally all of it.
Awesome.
They're just like, they're like, yeah, he made a lot.
They're just like, Bernie Mag did still jokes.
Fuck that guy.
He's the worst.
And they're just like, Steve Harvey is a hack and fuck that.
And I'm just like, okay, cool.
I'm on board with you.
And they're just like, yeah.
And the Illuminati really did make Ludacris a superstar.
I'm just like, Ooh, yeah.
Ooh.
I mean, I don't know the other stuff.
There's like receipts for like, you get like.
Yeah, there's like footage of Bernie Maxwell, those jokes, and, you know, Steve Harvey just is Steve Harvey.
Like, I feel like we've all been pretty confused about why he's famous for a long time.
Uh, at least I haven't.
I was like, okay.
But, yeah, like, and I also think Cat Williams is funny, but I also don't think any of those things are ground to stand on where he said the, like, the Illuminati, which is what, the only people he chooses the name, he just says the Illuminati.
And then at the end of that meeting they tried to kill me and I survived it.
of the same. One year we were going to make a huge star and the other where we brought
into this room to implicate ourselves so that you could tell the story down the line and
make us look like a bunch of goofs.
Exactly.
That would make more sense if you were just like, and then at the end of that meeting
they tried to kill me and I survived it. Here's my bullet wound from it. You know? That would
have been the ultimate reveal.
Yeah, they tried to brand me.
They took his wig off and the back of his head had a pentagram branded into it.
They were like, oh shit!
That would have had some gravitas to it.
Every week, Alex Jones has a bit in his show where he's like, yeah, I was talking to some globalists.
They told me to sell out.
I told them I couldn't.
They told me I'm great and I'm really strong and powerful and brave.
That whole interview makes Kat Lloyd look really powerful and brave.
I mean, I don't want to get too deep into it, but if you want to read about how great Cat Williams is according to Cat Williams, you could listen to the Cat Williams interview.
It's two hours and 40 minutes of pure gasoline.
But we have to move on to our second piece of Illuminati stuff.
Thank God!
I love the Illuminati.
Taylor Swift is back in the news, her being a member of the Illuminati, which should be no surprise to any of us.
This is so funny.
She's rippling with power.
Obviously she's fucking, obviously she's just by Moloch.
It would be like, if this were an anime, that would be one of the people that the townspeople would just be like, Taylor Swift receives blessings from the goddess.
Like, obviously.
You know?
But anyway, for those of you who don't know the full scoop, including myself, Mike, why is she back in the news this week?
QAnon promoter, The Patriot Voice, aka QAnon John, who then changed his name once everyone told him, yo, buddy, we don't say QAnon anymore.
You gotta change your name.
He made this post where he stated, during a NATO meeting, the idea for Taylor Swift to be used as a Psy-Op for the Pentagon was brought up.
It looks like they decided to go this route.
She blew up out of nowhere and has been plastered everywhere.
You're right, buddy.
No one knew of Taylor Swift until this year.
She was completely under the radar, completely unknown.
I said it from the beginning, all caps.
Not only is Taylor admittedly a satanic witch, I don't remember when she admitted that, but hey, she's also being used as a Pentagon PSYOP asset to swing many thousands of youth votes over the Democrats and quote-unquote combat misinformation online.
Effectively, she is a propagandist for the left, if she realizes it or not, and I believe she is well aware of what she's involved with.
To make matters worse, they paired her up with Travis Kelce because of how many Americans have their faces planted to the TV watching football.
He's a very effective salesman for Pfizer, selling RM&A deaths to the unsuspecting masses.
Wakey, wakey!
The whole world is a stage and they expect you to fall for it!
I love that overwrought melodramatic that is.
And all of this was also based off of Jesse Watters basically saying the same shit on Fox.
Yeah.
Weren't they saying on Fox that she's a Pentagon asset?
Right.
That's where he got this from.
Yeah.
Jesse Watters, like throwing a fit and being a giant baby.
Because Jesse Watters is what?
What is he?
He's just, he's the most Q-pilled person on Fox.
It's hard to do that, but he's done it.
I mean, he's the most Q-adjacent Fox News host they've got.
Also, like, I'll be the one to say it, because maybe I'm the only one on the podcast saying it, but I don't think it's... this is less bullshit than a lot of these conspiracy theories are.
I mean, I think it would be kind of fucking... I would be disappointed if our top-level intelligence people in our government weren't Thinking of ways to leverage the massive celebrities that come out of our country.
For whatever reason.
Like, specifically to shill for Biden or Democrats or whatever, I don't think so, or whatever.
And I certainly don't think they're pulling, like, you know, they're like, hey, Taylor Swift, like, fucking, you and Kanye West back before he went off the rails and all this shit, we're gonna bring you into our room and we're gonna give you your mission.
But, like, these people have a huge platform.
It would be insane for them not to at least consider that as an avenue to do a thing.
Whether or not they're actively doing it is a whole other matter, because that sounds crazy.
But if Taylor Swift is out there as some sort of, like, operation shilling for a left-wing agenda, it's because her politics are left-wing.
She has a massive platform due to her incredible talent.
I mean, I don't know.
She's pretty obvious to me.
Right.
I think that what these people don't understand is that stuff like this can be organic.
There's part of the Taylor Swift documentary where she talks to her parents about how she feels really badly that she wasn't more politically active in 2016 and that She has this guilt that maybe if she'd been gung-ho for Hillary, that might have done something to change a really close election.
And her father's like, you're going to eat a mountain of shit from people if you come out as a liberal, because politics is polarizing, and this is something you're going to have to deal with.
And she's like, I accept that, but this is what I believe in.
QAnon and right-wingers believe that you cannot be left-wing naturally.
It can't be something you actually believe in your heart.
The only way you can be a liberal is either you're just dumber than shit and have been brainwashed or rich people hand you bags of money and buy you off and make you a liberal.
And like, that's the, that's the world they inhabit where they're just like, the only way you can support those people.
I say, why the fuck did I get brainwashed?
Where's my money?
Right!
Where's my money?
Dude, bring up Ernie Lesko.
Hey, where's my money?
Hey!
Where my money at Ernie?
There's a lot of funny beef within the Turning Point USA influencer world, because that includes people like Jack Posobiec and obviously Charlie Kirk.
And then they have female content creators who do kind of make lifestyle podcasts and celebrity-based podcasts.
And they are the the the two women that kind of are their biggest influencers are obsessed with Taylor Swift.
They love Taylor Swift and they were kind of like trying to bake that she was actually a secret right winger for a while.
And then like Jack Posobiec was one of the people like leading the Like, Taylor Swift is secretly an asset kind of thing.
Like, Illuminati asset.
Because he was, like, posting a bunch of, like, just articles with her on the cover.
And the big Taylor Swift mania that's been happening this last year, like, especially, being like, this is all planned.
So, it is this funny beef within Turning Point USA world.
And like just in general that right-wingers are kind of turning against her.
I saw Mark Fincham, you know that like kind of QAnon, he used to be an election official here, but yeah.
The honey badger, AZ honey badger.
Honey badger, yep.
He don't quit.
He says that at rallies.
He was like heartbroken that Taylor Swift was like, when he was seeing the news on Fox News about her being a Pentagon asset, he posted a screenshot of the Fox News segment and he said, Hey Taylor Swift, who are you promoting?
The New World Order or us hometown peeps?
Absolutely heartbroken.
But yeah, in Arizona also, there's a Republican sponsoring a bill called the SWIFT Act.
And it's after Taylor Swift.
Because I think his kid wanted to see Swift and got all these upcharge fees.
And he's like, I'm sponsoring a bill to stop this.
We're naming it after Taylor Swift.
Good, honestly, fuck those people.
Buying a ticket to any show is terrible.
It's one of the reasons why I don't really go to shows in rooms that have larger than 3K occupancy anymore.
I'm not paying a subscalper or a bot scalper a bunch of upcharge money to get a nosebleed seat to watch a monitor of a live feed of a stage.
It's just not going to happen anymore.
I want to go to a time bar and see a local band, and the music might not be as good, but the vibe is what I want, you know?
That's why I go to concerts, mostly for the vibe.
It's just funny, these right-wing grifters, like, trying to turn the world against Taylor Swift, and even some Republicans are like, um, nah!
No, I love her!
It's also, like, attacking her is a bad idea.
Like, I mean, I feel like...
I don't know how often people need to make the joke about her fanbase being like kind of rabid and easy to mobilize to a cause before people just start like recognizing that it's true and they should probably just leave Taylor Swift out of their bullshit and just let her be a pop star.
Because her fucking fanbase is crazy.
I mean, like, you know, no disrespect if you love Taylor Swift, but, like, I would—that level of hyper-fanaticism is just something that I just don't resonate with.
The stuff I love the most, I'm just like, yeah.
Like, I love it.
But, like, I could never—the creator of the stuff I love the most could never point their finger at me to do a thing.
Like, no, I am.
Anyway, I love that.
Taylor Swift being a member of the Illuminati is so obvious.
Like, she did come out of nowhere.
Like, 20 years ago she just appeared, and now she's just really successful.
So bizarre.
God.
They're making it so obvious.
And it's just so silly, like, this thing about, oh, she's an Illuminati asset when Guess what?
Most artists are liberals, and this is why right-wingers get mad at them.
During Obama's re-election campaign, they had Katy Perry performing, and she was wearing a ballot dress that had the Obama-Biden square next to it filled in, and had the Romney-Paul square not filled in on the dress.
Like this, like this kind of thing where Hollywood celebrities and quote unquote influencers back the Democrat.
This isn't, this isn't new.
This is just how it works because in general, creative people tend to be more liberal and also they tend to be younger.
And that's why we have this difference where the young popular people back the Democrat and the old people are Clint Eastwood yelling at a chair at the Republican National Convention.
I mean, it's just.
Like, that's the dichotomy.
It's why Donald Trump- Also, what the fuck did Katy Perry do to piss off the Illuminati?
She seemed like she was playing the most ball.
She was dancing around as a ballot filled in for Joe Biden.
But as of 2024, her star is, let's just say, quite dim.
Not sure what Katy's up to.
I think she's a judge on American Idol.
But yeah, I mean, it's just, hey, she got replaced by Taylor Swift.
The Illuminati went with the new hotness.
That's how this works.
Can't we just see Tade Dogg rocking the filled-in ballot for Hillary Clinton, the runbacks?
Now with 12 years under our belt, maybe they'll like it better this time around.
Oh, what?
No, they still hate it?
Okay, let's move on to a real quick Boosh topic because we love talking about Lauren Boebert.
Mike, why are we talking about Lauren Boebert this week?
I heard she threw some hands.
Uh, so Lauren Boebert apparently assaulted her ex-husband, uh, at a restaurant or some other public facility and the police were involved.
And then today, uh, her ex-husband has been arrested on various charges, not stemming from that incident, but apparently because again, if you don't remember, her ex-husband was accused of exposing himself at a bowling alley to a bunch of teenagers and was just kind of a huge piece of shit.
Including her.
Yes.
Is that how they met?
I don't think so, but yeah, Boebert's whole personal life is concerning, to put it bluntly.
Seems like the sort of guy that, yeah, you might want to hit in public.
Although, at this point, Lauren Boebert should know that she should just keep her hands to herself in public.
She should just not go in public because it seems like people film her like paparazzi and they're gonna catch everything you do.
Yeah, I feel like if we get like a 30 second clip of her picking her nose and eating it she'll have done the like bad stuff you can get caught on film doing with your hands in public trifecta.
Yep.
Yeah, and one last thing I wanted to bring up about her, because I remember seeing this a little while ago, but I didn't bring it up.
She is actually jumping districts in an effort to stay in the House, because that razor-thin election she wasn't supposed to lose last time, that guy's running against her again, so she's now scared shitless of facing off.
I guess the guy that almost beat her in a midterm when now it's going to be a presidential election in a blue state.
So that guy's going to have the Biden coattails to ride.
So Boebert is jumping into the more conservative Colorado 4th District.
But there's already people there.
So now she's going to have to win a Republican primary if she wants to stay in Congress.
So that's going to be a very interesting little thing to see coming up down the line as the primary season hits.
Basically, if you win that seat, if you win that primary, you're going to be a congressperson because it's really red.
I saw the Democrat that's in that district now trying to grift off of it, being like, I'm trying to stop Lauren Boebert, so give me money.
It's like, buddy, you're going to lose by 10 points to whoever wins that nomination.
Calm down.
Like, don't.
I'm going to support the guy that's in Colorado District 3 that almost beat Boebert last time, because he seems like he's got a shot.
her madness and hopefully her political career is coming to an end.
So that would be very nice to see.
Couldn't happen to a better person, really.
She can go back to her successful restaurant business.
Just kidding.
That also works.
Okay, enough of that horse shit.
It's time to talk about Arizona, as we do every week.
So I'm going to toss it over to our Arizona correspondent, Haley, aka Arizona Right Watch, for the madness this week.
Haley, what's going on in the flaming crater that is the state of Arizona?
Unfortunately, kind of a lot, but we'll stick to two quick stories that honestly aren't that quick, but let's try it.
Elon Musk is getting on in on the Arizona election disinformation.
The AZGOP has found their strongest soldier.
He was on the tweeter tweeting.
Uh, that Arizona is the only state that doesn't require a proof of citizenship for voting in federal elections, which couldn't be more wrong.
Uh, cause he's trying to obviously whip up like, you know, undocumented immigrants are voting in Arizona.
That's why it's going blue panic, you know?
Uh, completely incorrect.
You, we're actually the only state that, uh, does require a proof of citizenship for state and local races.
It kind of actually, I mean, it does it, um, it actually, uh, like differs from federal law.
So our voting is a bit different here where like, Yeah, you have to show proof of citizenship, but if you can't, then you go on the federal-only voter ballot.
You get a federal-only ballot, and if you're found to be lying on that, it's actually a pretty big deal.
So anyway, this isn't huge, it's just Twitter and Elon and all that are going to be whipping up Arizona-based disinformation surrounding the election, which is...
To be expected, I expect to see much, much more conspiracies that we saw during the Cyber Ninjas audit and the Carrie Lake election.
Just all the lies that she told during her lawsuits and now all her lawyers are getting disbarred for.
They like took a bullet for lies, you know, now they're lies that are normalized in the public.
But anyway, there was even some like AZGOP members, this state rep, Justin Heap, who was like basically like like saying that he hopes Elon puts the scale like his thumb on the scale to influence the 2024 presidential election just like Twitter did um you know in 2022 of course that's what he said i'm not saying that that's what happened um but yeah so he's like basically saying like oh you guys
You know, use Twitter for your benefit in the previous elections.
Now we're going to do it.
Thank you, Elon.
So there was that.
Just a quick thing, you know, because I like to follow the election shit and we love to talk about Elon here.
Also, breaking news.
Would you believe it if I told you that Representative Paul Gosar has hired more racists?
No!
Yes.
Actually, yes.
I would very much believe that.
Because Paul Gosar is a Nazi.
Paul Gosar is a Nazi.
I've heard that.
I've heard that.
Comma.
I've heard that.
Don't sue me.
Anyways.
Is he affiliated with that guy who ran that museum from last week?
That guy I loved so much?
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
The hermit crab of Nazis?
I'll find a place where I can hang my flags!
I'll show you!
Um, so these are some, some, some interns that Gosar had.
Um, they are no longer working for Gosar, not because of this article, but just because they, they, their term was up and they no longer, they no longer are working for Gosar.
He never fired them, of course.
Um, but- Did they get raptured?
Is that why?
They got raptured.
Yep.
Uh- The Lord took, the Lord called them home?
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
Yep.
Uh, but Mike, you and I, uh, talked like for a whole episode about that one Griper Nazi that Gosar had hired years ago at this point, Wade Searly.
Um, and that was in like Talking Points Memo cause he had uh pretty openly been affiliating with Fuentes and um kind of saying some pretty explicitly racist stuff while working for Gosar.
Well this other fellow there's technically two staffers that were identified in this article by the Arizona Mirror um and their names are Alexander Katznelson and Samuel King.
I'm gonna focus on Katznelson because this one is absolutely the most explicit one.
Obviously he posted a lot of stuff about hating black people and Jewish people and women and saying that women shouldn't vote and women should be executed for having abortions.
Nice.
And all of that.
The greatest hits.
But his account name, one of his Twitter account names, this is the second week in a row where I have to censor myself.
His Twitter name was the abbreviation for Total N Word Death Rapist.
Yeah, um, so, and he had- Absolutely wonderful!
Yeah, and he had, like, Wojecs.
of him like on his account like killing trans people and with swastikas and you know sonnenrads and one of them had like a tattoo that said like n-words killed with like tallies but it actually said the word um and then it said like on the back like burn all k-slurs for jewish people uh so and he was just straight Hitler posting 88 posting um so anyway this Katz Nelson guy he used to be kind of like a Fuentes ally um they they clearly had a falling out at some point and when
This journalist reached out to Katznelson about his account and this explicit Nazi posting.
he removed the account like he blanked it and just changed it to Nick Fuentes's personal address.
Um so anyway Gosar really didn't have anything to say about this.
His staff released a statement saying, like, oh, of course Gosar does not support... he condemns anti-Semitism, racism, and homophobia in all its forms.
And then, um, yeah.
So...
That's the story with Gosar.
I'm sure things will be done.
You know, this is definitely not the first time this has happened.
This will not be the last.
But this guy that he hired, hope he never sees a career in politics again because holy fucking shit.
Anyways, that's Arizona.
Filled with slurs apparently.
I mean, no more or less than normal.
No, actually significantly more.
At least high-profile slurs this week.
But unfortunately, still not surprising.
I guess do better, Arizona?
I don't know.
I feel like the people that we have that listen, they're from Arizona, are here to listen to Haley, probably, specifically, or therefore are already on team.
Hey, Arizona should probably get his shit together.
Yeah, definitely.
God bless you.
You're doing the Lord's work.
Okay, well, it's time to get into our headline news for the week.
Mike, hit that sweet bump.
From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
Speaking of sweet bumps, I'm going to mix it up and segue into our breaking news, which is another surprising Hunter Biden W as our man decided to show up today to harass the GOP once again to just be like, hey, happy to answer any of your fucking questions there, bud, but only publicly, you fucks.
For more, I'll turn it over to Mike, our knower of stuff.
Mike, you know some stuff.
Yeah, so Hunter Biden just showed up to the Republican meeting that was supposed to hold him in contempt of Congress for refusing to- Okay, let me stop you right there.
Whose intro music should we walk out to?
I would assume Stone Cold Steve Austin's.
It was the Hellward theme.
That would be the huge bub.
Oh my God!
We gotta find out if Hunter Biden has a cameo.
Hunter, do I bump?
Yes!
He's gonna be real disappointed when he finds out what that means.
What the fuck?
Hey, we have a contract signed there, buster.
So yeah, he... So the glass shatters.
Yes, the glass shatters.
The Republicans all throw their hands up in exasperation.
They can't believe what's happening.
And Hunter Biden walked into the room and sat down and Nancy Mace, I believe, shouted at Hunter Biden that he, quote unquote, had no balls.
He had no balls.
We've seen him, Nancy.
We've seen his balls.
You have posted his balls, you've shown us his balls.
You people have waved photographs of his balls in front of us.
And that's just one, that's only the first of two very obvious examples of him in fact having balls.
The second of which being him showing up to this here meeting of yours to publicly ridicule you with his presence.
Like, that's not, like, a coward move.
Like, Donald Trump wouldn't do that and go someplace that's, like, literally enemy territory and just be there to annoy them.
He'll go to home field territory to annoy people, but, like, he's not gonna show up to the White House and just be like, Sleepy Joe, I'm here to harass ya, you know?
It's just not his style.
Nope.
Yeah, everyone who's ever, uh, the Trump White House was famous for Trump firing people by tweet or sending someone else to
fire somebody.
The man hated actual confrontation personally.
The man was like notorious for being incredibly cowardly when it came
to actually dealing with issues.
So yeah, Hunter Biden shows up.
This freaks out the Republicans.
Marjorie Taylor Greene then goes to speak and then Hunter Biden walks out on her and then he goes into the hallway and him and his lawyer have a press conference there and just like steal the thunder from the Republicans and just suck all the oxygen out of the room.
And the meeting actually ended without a vote to hold Hunter Biden in contempt.
He so disrupted it and he so broke their brains that they didn't even have the vote that they were intending to have.
That was the whole purpose of the meeting was to hold the vote and they didn't even do it because Hunter just dunked on them so aggressively and so violently that they were like, ah, we can't even do the thing we wanted to do because Hunter Biden just like showed us up so aggressively.
And also, um, The Democrats in the room were just sort of like, hey!
This whole defying subpoenas thing?
Hey, Jim Jordan, how about yours?
How about that subpoena you ducked here?
Here are a bunch of other subpoenas other assholes in this room have also ducked.
Like, fuck you with this whole contempt of Congress is sacrosanct.
You guys did it yourselves.
Like, if we indict Hunter Biden for this, that's literally selective prosecution.
Because a bunch of Republicans have done the exact same thing.
And you can all pound sand.
So, yeah, it was... this was...
My favorite part about all this is that like, and get me wrong, or don't get me wrong, I am not a huge Hunter Biden fan.
Like I don't know shit about the guy except for the fact that he seems sort of like a weird doofy playboy that gets into a bunch of trouble and can't help being like an anchor that's weighing down the guy we need to fight Donald Trump.
But that being said, My favorite part of this whole ordeal is how the Republicans have to spin it as some sort of, like, sign of weakness or boo.
Like, this guy sucks.
I'm like, look at how bad he sucks.
He showed up and did this incredibly cool thing.
Like, he just seems kind of like the Mac.
I don't know.
He showed up and he ate their whole lunch and they have to try to spin it as hard as they can to be like...
Ugh, Hunter Biden still sucks!
It's like, dude, you just... Like, we made a bunch of jokes about it being like a wrestling entrance, but it is sort of like political theater that does have an effect when it's done well, and this is how you do it well.
You show up, you sit down, you silently just disrupt a thing just by being there, and then you leave, and then you hold your own independent thing that sucks all the air out of it.
It's just like, oh.
Wow, and he didn't manage to call anybody a slur, or make fun of somebody with a disability, or, you know, do some abhorrent shit.
He just, like, used his presence in a savvy way.
I don't know.
Like, again, unequivocal W for the Hunster.
I'm sure he's gonna celebrate in the traditional fashion.
Hopefully maintaining his sobriety, so that'd be great.
Fox News had a crylon at the bottom of the screen that said, Hunter flees hearing room in face of GOP questions.
That absolutely did not happen.
They're just, like, trying to alter reality.
If, like, you tuned in late to the story, you'd be like, oh, Hunter Biden, that sniveling coward, ran from the Republicans when they dared confront him.
He ran away from the place that he showed up to, like, of his own accord.
Like, he showed up there, then he fled because he was afraid.
And, like, again, like, it's just like, I don't think his message of, hey, just interview me, like, just, like, do your work publicly.
Like, I demand that the American public get to see the questions that you're asking me and, like, you know, the proceedings.
I don't think that's reasonable.
Like, it certainly doesn't, it doesn't seem like he's running for anything.
It just seems like he wants to be, it's like the opposite of running.
He wants as many eyeballs on it as possible.
Yeah, Hunter Biden is like, I demand transparency in my questioning.
And the Republicans are like, no, no transparency.
And then he's like, well, then fuck you.
I ain't doing it.
I ain't gonna hide in the back room, have you ask me questions.
And then on the 11 o'clock news on Fox, you're going to be doing the sweet can thing to me, where you just chop up all my words and try to make it sound like I said shit that I didn't say.
Because that's what this is all about.
It's like literally just that.
It's like a setup for a gotcha.
And it's like a finger trap because the harder they struggle against it, the more it makes them seem like, you know, just idiots by way of the fact that they're making Hunter look better.
It's just like, like, I would never be thinking about this guy except for the fact that he gets to, he does stuff like this and it ruffles their feathers and it works.
And then I'm just like, okay, well, I guess we're talking about Hunter Biden on the show against this week.
It's just like, I don't know, man, just let the Hunter Biden thing go.
But they can't, because they got nothing.
Like, this is the closest thing to something that they got.
They're just like, oh, well his son is kind of an idiot, let's go after him!
Because aside from that, their only ammunition is, you're old!
Way to be old, old man!
to be old, old man.
Got him.
Yeah.
Fuckin' got him.
Meanwhile, his old ass is going to visit active war zones and shit.
It's like, yeah, I was so surprised you could even get off of that helicopter to that war zone, fuckin' old man.
Yes, good stuff.
Okay, let's move on from talking about the ultimate Chad amongst all Chads, Hunter Biden, who we all love unequivocally.
Uh, and talk about our good friend, uh, former President Donald Trump, who can't stop, uh, spewing rope out of his mouth for which people could hang him, uh, which is what almost exactly half of the country loves about him, which is so depressing.
Uh, for specifics, let's go over to Mike.
Mike, what's going on with the Trumpster this week?
Okay, so he's been having himself quite the week.
He started it off by reposting the same tweet, or truth, I guess, like 24 different times, screaming at the woman who successfully This is the one who alleged that Trump assaulted her in the changing room?
for the sexual assault.
E.
Jane.
Uh, I can never remember her last name and I apologize profusely to the
audience for being so ill prepared, but, um, this is the one who alleged
that Trump assaulted her, the changing room of that, like Macy's or whatever.
Okay.
Right.
Yeah.
And literally, like, he wasn't convicted of rape because they weren't sure if it was his tiny penis or a finger that was like that, like, assaulted her.
So it's like Jesus Christ.
He's on record having enormous hands.
So if there was any, if there was any question there, it's because it was huge.
So big.
Yeah.
So, uh, yeah.
E. Jean Carroll.
That's, that's your name.
And so basically, um, Trump just went on this crazy jag doing that.
And then after that, um, he made the declaration that he wanted to be, he wanted to help deliver the closing argument in his civil trial for the, uh, for the Trump business that's already been convicted in by default judgment in New York.
And so.
He was like, I want to be part of the defense team giving the final presentation to the jury.
And the judge said, well, you can do that so long as you don't turn it into a campaign speech.
And we just have breaking news now that Trump is now no longer going to actually be part of the closing arguments.
Shockingly, he made a big, bold claim that he was going to do this crazy thing and immediately backed down when faced with the slightest bit of pushback.
Yeah, that or what I would imagine for Donald Trump would have had to have been like maybe two dozen different people knowledgeable on legal matters that he happened to not hate all getting together and putting him in a room and giving him like an intervention.
Yes.
Like sending him around a giant circle and doing an arcade ritual that only lawyers can do to convince a guy to not do the stupidest thing possible.
Right, yeah.
It was so obviously an unbelievably bad idea, and yet Trump seemed to be very much in favor of it.
But we'll see.
I mean, it's not happening, and what will almost assuredly happen is Trump is going to complain that he was silenced by the corrupt judge and denied his right to speak in court and blah blah blah and all that fun stuff.
So those fun things happened.
And then finally, we had his lawyers, his actual lawyers, going before the judges in the appeals court about his claims of absolute immunity, at which point one of the judges asked, like, how absolute is this absolute immunity?
And one of his lawyers said basically that the only way a president can be, they can face accountability for their crimes is to be removed by impeachment.
And then they can face a trial in like criminal court.
So as long as you have 34 senators who will not convict you of any crime whatsoever, you are literally untouchable by the law, according to Trump's attorneys.
The lawyer then asked, if the president ordered someone, one of his political rivals, to be executed by SEAL Team 6, would that be okay?
Because it is an official government act that they are doing and carrying out, and they could not be prosecuted for it.
And Trump's lawyers really didn't have an answer for that.
And to this I say, that judge should be declared right immediately, and that ability should be upheld.
That way Dark Brandon can take over America, Purge-style.
Guess what?
The president can do whatever he wants as long as 34 senators won't convict him.
So, it's time for dark Brandon to take care of business.
So, yeah.
My god, Sleepy Joe woke up and he's pissed.
Sleepy Joe woke up and chose violence.
This summer, don't wake daddy.
We get the inception noise, cut scenes of Republicans running in terror.
That fucking, that scene from that over-the-top Civil War show that's coming out where it's just a helicopter flying through DC shooting missiles.
It's like, you okay?
Yeah, so we have all of that going on.
With all this stuff, it is mostly just an effort to delay things.
Like Trump knows he's going to lose the appeal.
Sadly, Sleepy Joe will not be allowed to execute the purge, would that he could.
But the point of this is to just try to make sure that none of these trials actually resolve themselves before the election.
Jack Smith's staff has filed a brief with Judge Cannon, the Trump-appointed shill that is going to do everything to delay the documents case to the best of her abilities.
And he has stated that Trump's legal team has provided them with no discovery whatsoever in the stolen documents case.
So literally, Trump is just not going to participate in that trial.
They're just going to stonewall it and just try to wall it off.
Literally, in Team Trump's mind, the only thing they need to try to gum up the works on is the January 6th case in New York.
Because the Georgia case is a very large and complicated thing that may take months to actually have the trial.
So they're just like, we can backburner all that other shit.
We just have to try to prevent Trump from being convicted of the January 6th crimes, of which he did.
Jack Smith also had a thing come out where they looked at Trump's Twitter account and the tweets where he was like, hey everybody, go home, be peaceful, stop attacking the Capitol, that's not great.
Those were actually sent by Dan Scavino.
Dan Scavino got ahold of Trump's Twitter and tried to Get everybody to chill out.
Trump didn't actually write those.
But the tweets where he was like, you know that Mike Pence, be ashamed of something were to happen to him, were written by Trump.
So it's just like, oh my God.
And all of this legal wrangling that we have going on at this point is very obviously Trump's lawyers aren't even arguing that he didn't do it.
They're just arguing you can't convict him of his crimes.
They're literally just saying yeah he did it but he can't be held accountable because he was the president and you need to just back off.
So I just think that like this whole thing is just so bizarre that like this is where we are in the year of our lord 2024 where Half this country is just sort of like, yeah, the guy that wants to be a dictator and isn't openly, like, happy criminal.
Sounds good to me.
I'm here for it.
I got the guy walking through the casino with the Biden is an idiot shirt on.
Well, if only he was just a dictator, because he's more of an if I can't have it, nobody can.
Because then you also have some spicy statements regarding the potential crash of the American economy.
Yeah.
Yeah, Trump was basically like, yeah, the economy's gonna crash at some point, and I hope it crashes in the next 12 months so I can blame Joe Biden for it, because I don't want it to crash under me, because I don't want to be Herbert Hoover.
That would make me very sad if I was like President Hoover.
Stop paraphrasing!
How dare you paraphrase the man?
Tell us exactly what he said.
Oh, what's that?
That's exactly what he said?
I don't want to be like President Hoover?
Didn't he say, he was just like, I always said, the one president I did not want to be like, is this guy.
Yes.
So insane.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's going to crash.
I really hope that it's within the next 12 months.
Says your future presidential candidate, you know, like the guy that you'll be voting on whether or not you want to be the dude with his hand on the wheel.
Like he, he would like the crash to happen now.
Thanks.
Yes.
Like, where does Joe Biden's policy on our economic situation, which is actually surprising levels of growth in the face of predicted not-growth, fly in the face of former President Trump's desire to see our economy crater at 12 months?
Really weird.
It's impossible to choose who to vote for.
Joe Biden is just so old, you know?
He's so old.
He's two and a half.
He's a whole two and a half years older than Donald Trump.
Show me one good thing Joe Biden's done for this country.
Okay.
Cool.
Now show me another.
Show me some until they wear out so I can tell you about how old he is.
Yes.
Or if you're a progressive with his voice.
Yeah, but what about my free college?
Okay, cool.
There we go.
Now we've got all our bases covered.
Don't worry, dear audience, we'll get back to talking about Donald Trump next week, I'm sure.
He'll never go a week without doing or saying something insane, except for the one time where he does his final insane thing, and what a podcast that will be.
The greatest podcast ever.
And in our last bit of news... Please fund us going to the funeral, listeners, whenever that happens.
Yeah, dude, we would be putting the fun back in funeral.
Yes!
But in our last bit of news, which I say sort of in quotation marks because, like, I haven't really heard shit from it, but a lot of people are talking about it, obviously.
Our Epstein documents!
They're back, baby!
Stephen Hawking was on the island!
What a time, you know?
Stuff.
Like, let's make a meme.
about the child sex he had because he was he was disabled as well.
Good stuff.
So, Mike, I've been hearing rumblings about this Epstein stuff, but I don't I haven't heard any arrests or like nobody's showed up mysteriously dead in their prison cell or anything.
So what gives?
What's up with the ducks?
So the docs have happened and QAnon and the right wing are screaming and yelling about Bill Clinton and trying to make it more than just that.
They're just trying to do something with this to just keep the momentum going forward while at the same time trying to avoid the whole fact that Trump is involved in this also.
And it's really funny because One of these two people is not relevant in any way, shape or form.
Bill Clinton hasn't been president since like 2001 for like the five minutes he was president then.
It's really funny that they're like, Oh, you pedophile liberals love Bill Clinton and he's on Epstein Island.
And it's like, what about Trump's ties to Epstein Island?
The Trump you're going to vote for?
Guess what?
I'm not voting for Bill Clinton.
That's just his day in the sun has come and gone.
We're, we're, we're past him.
Yeah, in the olden days you'd be able to confront them by just being like, oh yeah, Buster, well what about these?
And drop like a manila folder on the table and like all the photos of Trump with Epstein would spill out, like him with his arm around Epstein like, eh, this guy!
Like, how do you explain these motherfuckers?
So yeah, the first batch of documents came out and then recently a new batch just came out.
And in the new documents, Doe 174 appears to be Donald Trump.
I don't believe that these individuals are ever going to be actually named, but the information given about Doe 174 very much fits with Donald Trump.
So Donald Trump is absolutely part of the story.
He's part of the documents and the QAnon and the right-wingers are like,
whoa, if you read this, it's totally different and absolutely exonerating.
And it's nowhere near as bad as what they're saying about Bill
Clinton in these documents.
And they're blah, blah, blah.
And it's like, look, man, your, your buddy, like your buddy was in with
Epstein, just like Bill Clinton was.
And if they were the two candidates for president, boy howdy, would I be maybe looking third party.
But guess what?
They're not.
And also, again, we belabor the point a little bit on the show, but I'll just bring it up again.
As soon as you've got the goods on Bill Clinton, arrest his ass too, man.
If you're just like, here's the evidence that he was having sex with kids.
I'm down for arresting Bill and Hillary Clinton.
We can arrest Trump.
We can arrest...
Who else is on that list, you know?
Prince Andrew, yeah.
Get his ass, uh, uh, the Dersh.
The Dersh.
Get him off of Fox News and get him in the clinker.
You know what I'm saying?
No, that's a different thing.
Jimmy Kimmel's on that list.
Just getting Jimmy done to us.
That was the first thing I heard on Twitter, was that it was Jimmy Kimmel, and every time I searched Epstein, that was the first thing I would see, so that must be truth.
Yeah.
Yes.
I feel like, I mean, I can understand why you'd be wigged out if you were getting, like, death threats and stuff sent to your family, but I feel like Jimmy Kimmel chose the path of the moron by deciding to just be like, fucking fight me and I'll sue you!
He's like, oh no, no buddy, no, you're just fanning the flames!
Donald Trump Jr.
posted a tweet from some right wing like account that's just like that kind of disinformation where it was all like, obscene victim claims that the notorious pedophile ringleader had sex tapes of Clinton, Prince Andrew and Richard Branson.
And then people pointed out, uh, buddy, that, that headline had a fourth name in it.
Uh, why, why'd you leave out the fourth name?
Cause the fourth name in that headline was Trump.
So like this, uh, this one, this accuser stated that he had sex tapes of all four of those people and a team right winger was just like, you know, we're gonna just, you know, like trim one of those names off.
Um, Sarah Ransom was the woman in question who made the allegation that Epstein had these tapes.
Again, these tapes have never been produced.
We don't know about any of this stuff.
This is, in a lot of ways, much of QAnon's obsession with Anthony Weiner's laptop and the Hunter Biden laptop and every other MacGuffin that was going to bring down the Deep State once it was revealed to the world.
I'm sorry, guys.
Your boy, Scott, he's up to his neck in this Epstein shit.
So this isn't the unqualified win you want it to be.
Even though, literally, every time I'm scouring QAnon, they're just like, Epstein all day, every day, and we're just going to lie about Trump.
I saw one guy, they had the greatest cope video in the history of the world.
Because it was a, it was a clip of Epstein and Trump hanging out and Trump's like pointing at Epstein and like waggling his finger at him.
And he was just like.
In this video, you can see that Donald Trump's making the pedo swirl symbol at Epstein, and then he points his finger at him like a gun, showing that Trump knew Epstein was a pederast and that his execution was forthcoming.
And it's like, dude, that was like in the early 90s or the 80s.
Why did he wait like 30 years to get rid of this guy?
What's going on?
Why was the Trump investigation of the Epstein so slow?
Also, I feel like following this alleged symbol that definitely means pedophilia, I feel like any index finger heavy motion after that is subject to scrutiny, and not necessarily a finger gun, if you know what I mean.
Something tells me if those secret messages were being communicated, the intent of them may have been the opposite.
To use some old internet parlance.
Like, I'm totally into that.
My name is Donald Trump and I love Epstein.
That's why I keep flying to his private island.
They never floated to the private island!
Well, have you looked at the documents where they talk about how Epstein was recruiting girls from Mar-a-Lago?
Shut up!
He's like, yeah, great.
It is so funny that this whole cult has been just wrapped around the idea that we're fighting child trafficking and sex rings and all this stuff.
And it's like, your hero is literally a part of that.
Yes, again, manila folder.
How do you explain these, Buster?
Oh, what do we got here?
Looks like pictures.
Lots of pictures of your guy with our guy.
Yeah.
No, those are out of context.
It just looks like they're having a great time with Jillian Maxwell.
Yeah, looks like they're having a real great time.
Yeah.
Fuckin' horseshit.
Okay, well, yeah.
Again, when you drum up the proof and you get it into the hands of the right people, I hope everybody gets arrested.
Because that would be fucked up.
But until then, shut up about it.
Moving on to our headline news segment.
That's not correct.
Our listener mailbag segment.
That's the one.
Boom.
We did it.
We got it right.
Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
It's time for Q&A.
It would be great if I just launched into the headline news again, just the runbacks
cause everybody a great deal of confusion.
Yes.
Pancake Peasant asks, Internet conversations and drama can be completely disconnected from
reality.
What is your pick for the most severe case of this?
Oh my god.
Talking about Twitter in real life to people who don't, who don't, who aren't on Twitter.
It's like, oh my god, so Jackson Hinkle said this, and then Jimmy Adar said this, and then, uh, Poker and Politics said this.
And it's like, I don't know who any of those people are.
Shut up, weirdo.
That's the most, yep, that's it.
That's the most online.
I'm not gonna name names because I don't want to get in trouble with anybody, but I will say that there are several communities online, like a bunch of them, that are guilty of this, where people just get together and because they found their tribe, they immediately start to fucking go crazy tribal.
Even though there are a bunch of individual people with great intentions or whatever, they just get together, they just start Acting like a bunch of bullies and douchebags for no fucking reason?
I'm just like, just calm down, bud.
When you find your people, make it all love.
Don't go looking for your people so that you have a tribe of people to attack other people.
Fucking calm down.
That shit is crazy, because when you see those people, when I meet any of the various people for these, a lot of fandoms fall into this.
Because again, I keep a lot of my shit contained to petty pop culture stuff.
So a lot of pop culture fandoms fall into this.
You meet them in person, and they're nice, regular, normal people.
And then you fucking, you see their online discourse or whatever and it's just like, they're just absolute rabid lunatics about stuff.
And just with flaming hot takes that should be nowhere near Mankind.
That's always been the greatest disconnect for me between the internet and meatspace.
It's just like, oh god!
Yeah, I would say, I mean, I live in those two separate worlds where it's just so funny how one has nothing to do with the other.
I'd say I've started following some Flat Earth debunking accounts on social media, which is just kind of running, just dunking on Flat Earthers.
And I just think that's so So strange, because there is no, like, IRL flat earth that I know of.
It's almost entirely just pure internet trolls just making bullshit videos and screaming about, oh, there is no horizon.
If you just have a powerful enough camera, you can see a ship for forever, man.
It's just, oh my God, you're just running through the same tired hack bit over and over and over again.
And it's just, it's just silly.
But yeah, the internet warps people.
It breaks your brain.
Like just dealing with people like that is so strange.
And it is all of it's a very fascinating subculture of madness that, um, it's what Haley said.
It's very hard to explain to people how just.
How did we get there?
the reality is once you get online and just how bizarre the conversations
actually are about things, because you can start talking about sports and the
next thing you know, suddenly we're now dealing with the Illuminati.
And it's like, how did we get there?
What's going on?
I have a very specific example of something crazy that I missed.
This is independent of the thing I was mentioning before, because this is a single person who feels like they stepped out of pocket.
And, I mean, your minds may vary, but I thought it was really funny.
I'm going to an event.
That event tends to have a lot of people in costume.
The folks hosting the event have re-communicated their existing policy on costumes that are essentially just like, You can't have your whole ass out.
And if your customer requires you to have your whole ass out, just use skin tone, like pantyhose or whatever, you know, whatever you gotta do.
It can't be your bare skin.
Don't have your whole ass out.
Like, don't just show up wearing a thong or whatever, right?
Policy's always been on the books.
People get mad about it every year when they discover that they changed the policy, which they have not.
This year's no different.
But one person was just like, am I the only person that thinks that tight shit is sort of ableist?
Like, if somebody with sensory issues can't be expecting me to wear tights all day, and everybody was just like, What are you on about, mate?
A bunch of people with actual disabilities were like, stop speaking for me!
That's crazy talk!
Dude, don't be using that for this crazy policy.
You're not entitled to having your ass out.
Don't use...
Potential for a disability to just be like, I gotta have my ass out.
Because like in that situation, I'm sure a lot of people had a lot of questions that it would be weird to ask, but my first one would just be like, well, how do you get by in your day to day?
Like what do you wear?
Because like, I'm assuming like the choice to be in a costume where your ass is out, that's a choice.
Like you can just not make that choice, right?
You can just wear slacks or a dress or whatever makes you feel comfortable in your day to day life.
You don't have to show up as your like sexiest interpretation of a maid bunny.
That's just all cheap, you know?
And if you want to make that choice, then you know the cost.
The cost is the tights.
Anyway, a lot of people were just like, dude, you're out of pocket.
And I was like, that is the sort of thing that somebody would only say on the internet.
I couldn't imagine anybody saying that in real life to anyone and expect like a realistic response out of it.
Yeah, my cosplay of Harley Quinn from the first Suicide Squad movie requires the tightest ass booty shorts imaginable, and I cannot wear tights under them because of reasons.
Just, oh my god.
Calm down.
Just calm down.
That is wild.
That is absolutely the most hilarious thing I've heard in a while.
The internet's great.
I love the internet.
I mean, I feel like that's how everyone should feel.
Everyone should love and hate the internet.
Heroistic Velociraptor asks Peppers Haley with a series of questions.
What is the status of the AZ Fake Electors investigation?
What the fuck is going on with Ethan and the new arrest warrant?
And finally, what is the latest on Blaze and the Doomsday Mormons?
Hit me with them each one by one.
What's the status of the AZ Fake Electors investigation?
Ongoing.
It is...
Because we got a new AG, like previously it was Brnovich and now it's Chris Mays, so it flipped from Republican to Democrat.
There was no investigation into the fake electors whatsoever under Brnovich.
Chris Mays comes in, now she's doing it, but it's like a billion fucking Republicans in Arizona because they all love breaking crimes.
Um, it's actually just over a dozen.
But, um, still, you gotta investigate a bunch of them.
And there's also, like, the thing that'll definitely happen when charges start coming down, like, you're persecuting us, you're, you know, like, that kind of shit.
So they probably have to play it real careful and it's gotta be real airtight so hopefully that's coming soon or else I'm gonna be real fucking pissed.
There are these trucks that are driving around Queen Creek which is where Jake Hoffman who is a Turning Point USA like higher up slash representative here and he's also a fake elector.
He was previously banned for Twitter for running a troll farm for Turning Point USA ran by teenagers.
But there's like this truck that's driving around his district that is like, we're coming for you fake electors.
And he posted about it like, there's people threatening me in my district.
And that was very funny.
So we're coming for you fake electors.
Next question.
Uh, what is going on with Ethan and the new arrest warrant?
He is, there is an arrest warrant issued for those listeners who don't know.
There is a semi viral neo-Nazi here that often harasses.
LGBTQ communities, churches, synagogues.
He threatens to kill Jews and LGBTQ people.
He harassed people at a synagogue a while back.
He didn't face any jail time.
He just had to follow the terms of his probation and pay a fine, I think.
He did not follow the terms of his probation, shockingly.
So there's a warrant out for his arrest.
But as far as I know, the police have said they have not arrested him and I'm sure they're not looking for him because they don't give a shit about this guy because our police are lazy and corrupt.
Next question!
What's the latest on Blaze and the Doomsday Mormons?
Um, as far as I know, he has been extradited back.
Okay.
Again, for listeners who don't know, we have Mormons in Arizona.
Have you guys ever heard of Mormons?
We have a lot of them.
It's taken until the 1 hour 18 minute mark in the podcast, but I finally get to bring up Moroni.
Moroni.
You can catch your tickets now.
There you go.
Dude, who doesn't know what a Mormon is?
Like, I'm fucking... Moroni, I love that shit.
Do you guys have big Mormon communities in your area?
No.
No?
We have a ton, obviously because of Utah, but also, like, just in general, we have a pretty big Mormon community in Arizona and there's also been like the more dangerous offshoot sects of Mormonism here that are a bit more either fundamentalist like they actually do polygamy or there's been some like doomsday type more cultish kind of
Sex of Mormonism.
Lori Vallow is a pretty infamous one.
She murdered her kids.
She was actually just extradited to Arizona too because she'll be facing a trial here in Arizona too for that.
The Blaze?
I forgot how to say his last name.
It's like Tribidoo?
There was a worry in Arizona that something similar was going to happen.
This teenager got kidnapped by his siblings and he was taken to Canada.
They were trying to smuggle him out of the country.
His father was worried it was going to be another Lori Vallow situation because his family kind of dabbled in a bit more extreme Mormon sect.
And yeah, siblings were arrested.
The kid, the teenager, is back in Arizona, as far as I know, and the siblings that were arrested are, I think, I think the, because it was a, the siblings were male and woman, male and female, the woman is, Being housed in the same cell as Lori Vallow.
So that'll be an interesting crowd.
But yeah, that's the update on all three of those things that you just said.
Nailed it!
Here, one-stop shop for all things Arizona.
Nailed it.
And finally, Leach from Buffalo asks, is Texas Hold'em the best form of poker?
I would say that Texas Hold'em is the most popular form of poker, and therefore it is the form of poker you wish you were going to want to learn the most about if you want to make money at the game, because poker is now Texas Hold'em.
It's like conspiracy theories are now QAnon.
Like, there's other forms of those things, but people know the shorthand of, like, if they're like, hey, you got poker in this joint?
They mean Texas Hold'em.
That's what they're talking about.
So, as for the actual games...
I actually like a lot of games that are not hold'em.
I love Stud 8 or better.
That's probably my favorite game.
I love split-pot games like that.
I love Lowball.
I love Padugi.
I love Deuce to Seven Triple Draw.
Any, like, funky, weird, varied game of poker is something that, like, I do enjoy.
So I would say those things are something I enjoy much more, but for, like, what do you have to learn if you want to make a buck or two at this thing?
You gotta start with all of them, because that's what everyone's playing.
And that's where the morons are.
And eventually, if you're good enough, you get to a point where it's less morons.
You don't have to, you never have to go that high to actually make a living at poker.
If you have enough of a bankroll, you know what you're doing.
You can play one, two and two, five and just like make like a thousand dollars a week or so if you're just trying to grind.
But that's the problem is that like people play poker because it's exciting and fun.
And then after like three, four months of doing that shit, you're like, oh shit, I've just obtained a different job.
But it's the one job in the world where you can go to work and lose money.
It's like you get home from work and your spouse is like, Hey, honey, how was the day?
And you're like, Oh, lost two weeks of wages.
How's that?
It's like, Oh, no.
So yeah, I mean, it's...
It's brutal that way.
It's a very brutal, uh, it's a brutal hobby.
It's a really brutal way to try to make a buck or two.
Um, as someone, I don't know who said the quote, but they said, uh, poker is a hard way to make an easy living.
And then true words were never spoken.
Uh, yeah, my answer is a lot simpler.
I would say, yes, it is.
The best button is not my favorite.
Yeah.
What is your favorite game?
Uh, I mean, If I had, like, the roll for it, probably just stud 8, right?
I mean, stud 8's just, like, a blast when it's popping off, but that seems like it would require a lot of disposable money to sit there and, like, chase bullshit and, like, ride those highs and know that you're going in for a little more of a gamble than just sitting down and playing traditional by-the-numbers holds.
Oh yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.
Like, uh, uh, El and I had a home game that was, uh, like the first, like, two hours were, uh, Hold'em and then the last, like, two or so hours were Stud 8.
And we had, like, one guy that would literally sit in the other room and play video games until the Stud 8.
He was like, just, I'm only here for the Stud 8, guys.
Like, Hold'em, you can piss up a rope.
Yeah.
I mean, those were great times.
The D-Gen days when everybody wanted to get in and it's a gambling action.
It was just so easy to get a home game up and ready for anything.
Yeah, Chris Moneymaker just broke the world for poker.
Like, literally.
Some nobody from nowhere is the world champion of poker.
The next world champion could be me!
Oh my god.
I mean, that's literally how I got into the casino business.
Yeah, because like, when somebody gets elevated to the highest national, like, when somebody wins, like, the fucking MVP of the NFL or whatever, you don't have a bunch of other players coming out to just be like, Yeah, I don't know, that guy's not very good.
I remember when Chris Moneymaker won, like, a bunch of professional poker players, they were trying to be diplomatic about it, to varying degrees, except for probably Phil Hellmuth.
I'm sure he was just like, hey, that guy sucks, I'm a dickhead.
But like, a bunch of them were just like, oh yeah, you know, like, everybody can go on a deep run, I guess.
That's super funny.
Yeah, that was my favorite thing from that era was a few years later when Jamie Gold won the World Series.
They had him playing an ultra high stakes cash game with real professionals.
And they had the co-host of the show being like, hey Gabe, Are these pros intimidated playing against a world champion?
That's the dumbest question I've ever heard asked on a poker show.
And Gabe Kaplan was like, no, I think they're pretty comfortable playing against Jamie Gould.
Yeah, I think.
I wonder.
Yeah, I wonder, is Daniel Legrande and Phil Ivey, are they nervous playing Jamie Gold?
It's like, no, they're not.
They're licking their chops.
This guy's free money.
Has Phil Ivey ever been nervous?
I know.
He's like a sphinx.
Yeah.
So yeah, we love Stud 8, and I love Lowball on top of that.
But like I said, to stop myself short, was basically, right after Moneymaker won the World Series, I had a friend in Nevada who was dealing poker, and he was just like, bro, come out here, two legs and a pulse, you can get a dealing job.
And because it was just, poker was so hot at that time.
It was so wild.
Like, Rounders was the biggest thing.
It was like... Rounders, like, came out at the wrong time.
If it had come out, like, a year later, it would have been, like, an actual box office hit.
But instead, it became, like, a weird cult classic because everyone was getting into poker due to Moneymaker.
Now there was this poker movie that had Matt Damon and Jordan Malkovich and Ed Norton.
And it was like, oh, shit!
And so it's just...
That whole zeitgeist of that time was wild compared to where it is now, where you just have everyone's just sort of like, like poker's a thing.
It's background noise.
It's just like static in the background.
And every now and then there's like a poker scandal that you see online, but it's really just, there's nothing like what it was back then.
Well, there you go.
Any other mailbag questions?
Nope.
That just brings us back to our standard mailbag finisher, which is what are you guys looking forward to?
I'm going on a big event.
I'm not going to be recording with the gang next week, because I will be in an event.
I will be in the Washington of D.C.
for a cool event out there where people are not to have their whole asses hanging out, even though several of them will.
No, that was four days ago.
We have a day for that.
I'm going to a music festival.
It's going to be a fun time.
It's going to be a bunch of people, cool costumes, a bunch of music.
Uh, getting to see a bunch of my boys that live down there.
Uh, maybe even some of my boys that work for the government.
Ooh, I know.
Yeah.
I'm going to find out, uh, I'm going to find out some Illuminati stuff for sure.
I'm going to be like, hey, where the fuck is my invitation to the party?
I want to sell it for cash.
I've been pretty open about it.
Yeah, find out exactly how deep the Taylor Swift rabbit hole goes.
Like who got her in on the operation here?
Who looped her in?
Is Cat Williams right?
I need to know.
Yeah, anybody who's in the know will already know what I'm talking about.
So if you happen to also be at the show, I will be there.
But part of being Mysterious Elf is not exactly telling you where I'm going to be.
So mysteriously, I will be there.
And if you catch me, I'm like an elusive Pokemon.
You know?
Yes.
Mysterious.
So Haley, what are you looking forward to?
I'm going to go to lunch in a few with someone and it'll be nice.
What are you getting for lunch?
I don't know, probably a sandwich.
I love sandwiches.
Sandwiches are good.
I approve of sandwiches.
Yeah.
I'm looking forward to getting over this cold.
My cold is finishing, so that's good.
And I'm looking forward to that.
I'm also looking forward to listening to the last two episodes of Rob Reiner's Insanity, because apparently they're going to name who killed JFK in episode 10.
So finally, my long quest for the truth is going to be revealed to me.
Rob Reiner's going to do it for me.
It's about damn time.
Right.
It is.
Consolidated O'Brien and Rob Reiner finally got to the bottom of this shit, so good on you.
Spoiler alert, they didn't.
They're out of their minds.
They're nuts.
So, yeah.
No way, they totally did.
It was so easy.
They did it instantly.
Over the course of like 10 episodes, they were like, hey, we're gonna crack this one wide open.
Yep.
I made movies, dammit.
Exactly.
How hard could this investigation shit be?
I made movies, motherfucker.
And also, I'm looking forward to digging into Taskmaster New Zealand Series 2, because Elle's been raving about it, and I love all forms of Taskmaster, so I'm going to have to do that.
Oh, dude, have you not watched any of it yet?
Oh, it's so good.
It's so fucking good.
I watched what I thought was Season 2, because I remember, like, way back in the day, you told me, like, Season 1 kind of weak, Season 2 great.
So I think I watched Season 2.
Is Series 2 Season 2, or is it different?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sorry.
Series 2 is just the way they say it in countries that are not the United States.
Oh.
Oh, okay, then I think I've seen it already.
Damn, oh well.
Sorry, buddy.
Still great, though.
I'm re-watching it.
Yes, it was.
It was great.
All right, well, on that note, it is time for us to funk straight away from Hellworld.
This week, let's say, Paddleboat.
Incredible paddleboat down the Hellworld River.
It exists.
It's terrible.
Just like the rest of the town.
And we're on the boat getting the fuck out of here.
Thank you so much for listening to the show and supporting us with your ears.
If you would like to support the show even harder, but still for free, you can do so by giving us a five-star review wherever your podcasts are provided.
If you have money and you want to give it to us, Lord knows we will take it.
You can go to patreon.com slash pokerpolitics and give us your donos there.
Anybody who donates $5 or more per month.
It gets access to our slate of bonus content.
I believe 60 or more hours at this point.
It's a lot of stuff, including a bunch of different series featuring new and old Hellworld residents.
You know, Haley providing some stuff for the new content, as well as the old back catalog featuring our boy Sarge.
So $5 or more per month gets you access to that tier.
Thank you, everybody in our crib.
We love our beautifuller babies.
If you have money and you don't want to give it to us because we are just a bunch of dickheads talking shit on the internet, we totally get it.
There's a lot of good ways to do wonderful things in the world with that money, but one of the ones that we suggest is love146.org, an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
Thanks as always to DJ Minimal Effort for the use of our original theme song, accidentally remixed by Mike Raines himself, into the thing you heard this very episode.
Thanks to our boy Frosty, who joined me on Blue Sky.
Not that I give a shit about the platform, but he joined it finally, hopefully abandoning X for good.
So you can find Frosty on Blue Sky, at FrostyVO.
Me on Blue Sky, at Mysterious Elle, who cares?
Haley's various social media platforms, at Arizona Right Watch.
Uh, including Blue Sky and I believe still, uh, Twitter slash X. Uh, Mike Rains, of course, Poker Politics, of various social media, including Blue Sky and X slash Twitter.
Uh, and the show itself, still, uh, wasting away in its own little digital Hellworld on the platform formerly known as Twitter, at Hellworld with a Q instead of an O.
So for another successful episode of the Avengers in Hellworld Podcast, I have been one of your co-hosts, The Mysterious L, joined as always by our expert in all things Arizona crazy, Haley, aka Arizona Right Watch, and our expert in all things Humanon crazy, Mr. Mike Raines, aka Poker and Politics.
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