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Dec. 8, 2023 - Adventures in HellwQrld

01:30:42

Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #167: Dictator Trump, QAnon Vs Flat Earth

Trump openly admits he wants to be a dictator, if only for 24 hours, also the Flat Earthers are causing all sorts of issues with the QAnon promoters. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Time	Text
	I'm going to go ahead and get started. So let's get started.
	♪♪♪ Content Warning
	I really just can't get over that funky beat that you accidentally made.
	about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and
	violence against people.
	Listener discretion advised.
	Hello, everybody, I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
	Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventure in some Hell World.
	This week, I am joined, as always, by Haley, a.k.a.
	Arizona Right Watch.
	Hello, everybody.
	I really just can't get over that funky beat that you accidentally made.
	It's so good.
	And the mysterious hell.
	Fuck y'all babies.
	No, hi babies.
	I'm here!
	He made it!
	That'd be great.
	I'm coming with incredibly toxic energy this time.
	No, I'm also still very chuffed about our new weird intro music.
	It sounds a lot like cyberpunk and dystopian, but like Nintendo dystopian, where it's just like, it's just like a, you know, the three of us standing dramatically on like a, like a rooftop, like the fucking, you know, cyber wave style, just beyond glow behind us.
	And then it's just like, welcome to the future.
	Welcome to 2015.
	It's super pretty!
	We can fly.
	We know kung fu, you know.
	Aren't you three dudes bad enough to save the president?
	That'd be great.
	Me.
	I don't know who amongst us is the baddest dude.
	Probably Hayley.
	Actually, you know what?
	Hayley is certainly the baddest dude.
	I'm the baddest of the dudes here.
	Well, I mean, like, I don't know if you know... Do you know the video game Bad Dudes?
	Mm-mm.
	Are you familiar with the video game Double Dragon?
	No.
	No.
	Okay, well, these are video games from a long time ago where you and one of your buddies got to play two shirtless, muscle-bound dudes.
	Well, I guess in Double Dragon they're wearing vests.
	Uh, and you just, like, walked out the streets of the town beating ass for various reasons.
	And Bad Dudes is to save the president from ninjas, I think.
	Uh, and, uh, it means that you have to do a lot of, like, brawling in the streets against people that are what would be considered punks in the 80s.
	So lots of mohawks and, like, denim cut-off vests and guys pulling switchblades and stuff like that.
	And, you know, if any of us needed to be called to fight punks in the street, I feel like you would be the one.
	I'll smash a face.
	I'm sorry.
	Yes.
	I'll razzle a face.
	I'll insult a face and make the face not want to be near me anymore.
	Yeah.
	I'll be catty to a face.
	What about you, Mike?
	You gonna smash a face?
	I am incapable of facemashing.
	I am very much a person that I, when stuff goes wrong at work, I lean on security very heavily.
	That is not my, that's not what I'm here for.
	Yeah.
	The security remove, sorry.
	Oh, sorry.
	I was just going to complain about how I have very bad My testosterone is very bad, and like, when it's go time and I have to fight somebody, because I've been in a bunch of scraps, especially when I was a kid, I was in scraps all the time, but when the adrenaline hits me, it just, it makes me cry.
	Like, not like sob or anything, but like, tears just start, like, my face gets flushed, like, and very red, and tears happen, and then, like, you know, I used to go straight for the throat.
	I was, I was a, I was a...
	I was a grab-you-and-wrestle-you, like, kingpin-fight-you sort of guy.
	I threw—one of my friends threw, like, threw a wall into his kitchen one time, because there was no, like, stud work in the one area I shoved him into.
	So he just went through the plaster into his kitchen.
	Very funny.
	You're like a superhero or villain.
	Yeah, except just sobbing, just like a fat, like 12 year old kid just sobbing.
	Like, or it looks like sobbing, but just really just furiously crying, just choking the life out of his friend.
	How dare you!
	You insulted my mom or something!
	Is that what he did?
	Did he tell your mom joke and just throw it on the wall?
	No, I insulted his mom and then he punched me.
	And then he realized what he had done and he ran.
	And running was the problem.
	Because I chased him, and I chased him into his back hallway where I knew his back door was locked.
	And then he pleaded for mercy, and instead we ended up in his kitchen.
	And that was the end of the fight.
	I mean, we were both very afraid of getting in trouble.
	Which we did, because we broke their wall.
	That's a good fight.
	I just remember at some Magic the Gathering event that I was at, there was this kerfuffle between two people, and one guy very angrily yelled at the other one, Fight me right now!
	And that became this running joke for the next million years, that whenever two people were upset with each other, someone would just yell, Fight me right now!
	Like, yeah, we're just gonna do this.
	I do remember the days of Fight Me Right Now.
	Fight Me Right Now was for when things needed to get violent and Dance More, they were watching us, when things needed to get funky.
	It was just, you wanna go, bro.
	When I was in school, it was like, you wanna go?
	You wanna go?
	And most of the time, people did not wanna go.
	It was all a lie.
	It was just a tactic to seem threatening and then it's like, all right, let's go.
	And then they're like, whoa, whoa, I didn't actually want to go.
	And that's how it usually went when I was in school.
	There was a lot of that, I think, going around just across the board.
	I mean, I found out pretty early in my scrapping career that the emasculating Uh, open hand or backhand slap across the face.
	So like old school style, like, Hey, you want to fight?
	I'm going to slap you.
	And that will either initiate a fight or you will back down.
	And like, I, like, I think like the first time I pulled that move out was like in sixth grade.
	Like the other fat kid in school, like challenged me to some sort of like competition.
	Like he was like, talking, shaking at my face.
	So I just slapped him in front of God and everybody.
	I was like, all right, we fighting now?
	You showed him who the king of the fats was?
	Yeah, I showed his ass, but good.
	No, he did not want that smoke.
	He backed down immediately and middle school was pretty rough for him for a little while after that.
	Because it was in front of a lot of people.
	Embarrassing.
	You embarrassed him.
	Yeah, I sounded more prideful of that than I am.
	You sound like a bully.
	Oh, I was a bully in my early formative years.
	Like, I was for sure a bully.
	But I was not a violent bully.
	I was always like, I was the fucking behind the scenes, like, fucking talking enough shit about you that it's fucking up your life kind of bully.
	And I paid for it.
	And I used that opportunity to turn my life around.
	And now I'm not a bully anymore.
	I saved that energy for arguing about pop culture shit.
	It doesn't matter.
	Because even if people get mad about that, at the end of the day, they shouldn't get too mad about that.
	Because who cares if I think Doctor Who is bad?
	I mean, it is bad.
	And that is why I think that.
	But you might love it, and that's fine.
	You can love a bad thing.
	Nobody's going through a wall over this argument?
	No.
	And nobody's going through a wall ever again, because I don't want to pay for a wall.
	Did you have to replace the wall as a kid?
	No, I think somehow their landlord ended up picking up the tab on that.
	Oh, that's even better.
	That's Praxis.
	I mean, to be fair, it's not like I'm super strong or anything.
	Like I shouldn't have been able to go through that wall to begin with.
	Like we were both like genuinely flabbergasted.
	It was just like, look, man, I know that I'm like heavy for my age, but like if a full grown man just put their weight on that wall, it would have buckled.
	It was just you were pointing out the shoddy workmanship for him.
	Yeah, it just so happened that I was in the process of giving my friend, like, a Goldberg-style spear, and that was our weight test for that section of law.
	I'm sure they accepted that excuse.
	They're like, oh yeah, that sounds right.
	Good call.
	Good call, El.
	Also, I got it just as bad as I gave in a lot of instances, too.
	There was one kid in the neighborhood who did want that smoke, and whenever I stepped to him, he would just punch me in the face.
	And that was that.
	And uh that was the end of that one.
	One time I got invited over to like a sleepover party that or like a yeah sleepover party I guess is the best way to say it uh that in hindsight I'm pretty sure that like I got invited to be like like the the fat goober that they score points off of or whatever uh which is fine because it gave me this hilarious memory like Captain Quarterback was like one of the people that was there like that like the kid that would go on to be like the boy king of our high school he was just like captain sports and we had a snowball fight and it was like nah man like i vividly remember just like full like running away from this chap like as fast as my little legs would take me down this street and then suddenly like
	A snowball hit me right between my shoulder blades, that in my mind, like, lifted me off the ground with my back all arched all dramatically, like I was getting shot in the jungle by Charlies or whatever.
	Just, it was platoon.
	I'd never been hit, I'd never been struck by an object so hard that wasn't a fist.
	It was insane.
	Like, I was on the ground over it, like, I was just like, the snowball!
	It was crazy.
	I remember one time I was, I was, I loved playing like flag football or any kind of football I could
	And I woke up that morning and my back was really sore.
	But I really wanted to play anyways.
	So I convinced my mom to drive me to the park for the game.
	And it was just an absolute driving snowstorm.
	And I showed up and I was just like walking around and I could barely move because my back was so screwed up.
	And no one else showed up.
	Everyone else ditched because of the snow.
	And I was just like, damn you!
	This is incredibly unhealthy for me.
	My back is out and I'm in a world of pain, but I want football so bad.
	I will do anything for it.
	And then no one else was like, yeah, this is stupid.
	It's snowing out.
	People don't play football in the snow.
	Are you nuts?
	So my dreams of suffering a debilitating injury were cruelly denied me by everybody else's common sense and objective acceptance of reality.
	Don't worry, Mike.
	You're still old.
	You'll get a chance to hurt yourself.
	Oh, don't I know it!
	Oh, don't I know it!
	Oh, man.
	Okay, I feel like we've probably wasted the people's time enough.
	So you want to move on into the Amuse-Bouche?
	It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
	Get ready for the Amuse-Bouche!
	I was very excited when Mike told us that this is the first thing we're going to be talking about today.
	The first relevant thing we're going to be talking about today.
	Because I love this stupid aspect of the show, and that is QAnon versus Flat Earth.
	A classic beef.
	Mike, what dredged this shit up?
	Okay, what actually dredged this shit up was when Elon's rocket exploded or did what I what did he call it like a spontaneous spontaneous disassembly or whatever the terminology he used.
	There's a euphemism for exploded.
	Yeah, all the girls.
	Right.
	It totally didn't fail.
	So, um, when this, when the rocket exploded and totally didn't fail, there was this weird sort of a cloud effect that happened as a result of the explosion.
	And this led to the firmament trending on Twitter.
	Oh, hell yeah.
	And people were just like, did Elon's rocket hit the firmament?
	And that's why it exploded and all this nonsense.
	And, So the Flat Earthers started getting their chests out and feeling like, yeah, it's time to start talking up Flat Earth because it's the truth and you all know it.
	This led AwakendOutlaw, one of our favorite QAnon promoters, to make a post where he was like, yo, flat earthers, can you chill out about the flat earth for a little while while we try to defeat the satanic pedivore ring that rules our earth and has done so for generations?
	Because the normies, the normies ain't ready for flat earth.
	They're barely even ready to know that Tom Cruise is a monster, so we gotta bring them up to speed slowly, and your Flat Earth stuff is distracting people.
	It's taking our eyes off the prize, and the first reply was a Flat Earther telling Awakened Outlaw, No!
	No, I will not let Flat Earth go.
	Flat Earth is what matters, bro.
	If you ain't willing to accept Flat Earth, then we can't talk.
	And I just thought that was really funny that, like, the flat earth guy was just like, I've picked my battle, you pick yours.
	Mine is convincing people the earth is flat.
	And that's, that's my truth.
	And you're just gonna have to accept it.
	Also, a not insignificant amount of the normie population saw that same documentary I did where those people shot that fucking laser and proved themselves that the Earth has a curve to it.
	It's so weird.
	And then that hot mic picked that guy up just being like, oh god, I have to tell these people the fucking laser's fucking Earth's curve is fucking ruined.
	It's just like, yeah, man.
	It's fucking round, dude.
	Like, mad people have known this for a long time.
	Yeah, so that all.
	How did rockets previously penetrate the Firmament?
	Oh, they were faked.
	NASA faked all the rocket launches.
	Oh, the amount of... Flat earthers love nothing more than taking Buzz Aldrin out of context and making it sound like Buzz is admitting that they never went to the Moon.
	They are... Moon landing denial is a big part of Flat Earth.
	You have to believe in one to believe in the other.
	He would, like, punch you over that assumption.
	Like, he was known to, like, if you pulled that shit on him in public, he would punch you.
	Yes!
	There's video of him doing it.
	So, like, it seems really unlikely.
	Like, that's one of the greatest clubs ever.
	It's gonna be like, hey, fuckin', whoa, whoa, you told me the truth about the moon!
	He's like, fuckin' moon you!
	Yeah, fuckin' get him!
	Yeah, so basically, the main clip they like to use is there's like a child interviewing Buzz Aldrin and her question is mostly, why haven't we been back to the moon?
	And Buzz's answer is basically something to the effect of, well, we can't go back to the moon because they got rid of everything that we used to go there.
	And he seems very wistful and very much pro more moon landings.
	But they take what he said to being like, oh yeah, we can't go back there anymore, and blah, blah, blah.
	And they just sort of twist it into being like, Buzz is admitting we can't go to the moon, and therefore he didn't go to the moon, and it's all nonsense.
	And it's like, no.
	What Buzz Aldrin is talking about is all the equipment they used for human people being on the moon.
	It's all really specialized shit.
	Once we stopped going to the moon, they stopped making that stuff because you don't need it anymore because it only serves one purpose.
	So if we were to go back to the moon, we would have to make all that shit again by scratch because it's not relevant.
	It's not something we just have in our stockpile.
	Also, I'm no moonologist or anything.
	I'm just a regular uneducated guy.
	But I'm pretty sure the reason we haven't been back to the moon is because we only went the first time to put our collective balls on the collective forehead of Russia.
	And then in doing so, we found out that the moon is fucking boring.
	And there's just not a lot going on on the moon.
	Little cheese, despite what I've been told.
	Yeah, it's just a bunch of fucking rocks.
	It's like, ah, sweet rocks.
	And, you know, maybe at some point we'll find out that the moon has, like, the moon has a use as, like, you know, real estate for at some point getting us deeper into space or whatever.
	But aside from that, there's not a lot of reason to go back to the moon, my dude.
	Like, why moon?
	You know?
	Are satellites real?
	Do they exist within or without of the firmament?
	What is the opinion of satellites?
	I believe that the general explanation of satellites is that they're within the firmament and therefore they are allowed, but...
	I've also heard people say that they're all bullshit too, because again, once you do the whole space thing, it really makes all that stuff really wonky.
	Projections.
	And what was really funny was Jordan Sather, who's another QAnon grifter, he just came out and he was like, you flat earthers are stupid and I hate you.
	He was just not having it.
	Like Awakened Outlaws, trying to coddle them and be like, guys, guys, we can hash out the flat earth later after we beat the deep state.
	But for now, let's just chill.
	Sather, whose brand is kind of dunking on people he thinks are beneath him, he was just like, you all are stupid.
	Boom.
	Screw you, flat earthers.
	And I was like, man, this guy's absolutely terrible.
	And he tells people to drink bleach.
	But at the very least, he's willing to call a spade a spade when it comes to flat earth and what a ridiculous bunch of nonsense it is.
	You gotta give him credit.
	He somehow acknowledges that the world is round.
	Yeah, you don't actually have to hand it to the guy.
	And what's so funny about this is that this is going on inside of QAnon, and Q themselves specifically went out of their way to crush Flat Earth.
	Because Q did a Q&A zing one time, and he was just grabbing various questions that were being bombarded upon him on 8chan.
	And one of the questions was someone asking Q, they were like, Hey Q, to shut all these flat earthers up, is the earth flat?
	And Q replied, no.
	Q was just, Q picked up that question and used it.
	And it's just like, yo guys, your boy, the super secret spy who travels through the time streams, he told you the earth isn't flat.
	Like it's over.
	You're done!
	And the Flat Earthers are like, no man, Q said the Earth isn't flat, but that's not the real shape of it.
	You don't understand what the Earth really looks like.
	It's not a globe or flat.
	It's something else.
	It's like, no, shut up.
	A secret third shape?
	Yeah, like a sexy hourglass shape.
	It's boobs.
	It's shaped like boobs.
	Hell yeah.
	Dude, put them on the glass, Earth.
	Yeah.
	That's what they don't want you to know, because you'll get too grabby.
	I want to see him.
	Yeah, Earth has got them birthing hips.
	Earth's got to sway when Earth walks.
	Dude, I think I saw Earth shaking it on top of a moving car in that GTA 6 trailer.
	Yes, absolutely.
	And Earth was looking pretty nice.
	Yes.
	Mm hmm.
	That's why they call her Mother Earth, you know?
	Yes.
	She's a mommy.
	We talk about sick women now.
	Horny Jail.
	Somebody get the Horny Jail corgi out.
	Or Sheba.
	It's a Sheba, ain't it?
	Horny for Earth.
	I'm over here getting bricked up over Mama Earth, you know?
	Move!
	That's a mother I'd leave to future generations.
	Am I right?
	We need to start sexualizing Earth to save her.
	That's the only way.
	Let's be real, it is the only way that some men would pay attention.
	Like, shit, she's hot?
	Alright.
	Dude, did you see those fucking sexy pictures of Earth that just came up, man?
	How to save her.
	This sounds like some fucking high-concept sketch for some show that we'll never put out.
	Just some funnel guy, all of his co-workers talking about fucking hot earths.
	Nothing but just highbrow stuff on this podcast.
	Yeah, horny jail for all of us.
	Anyway, flat earthers are stupid, and I love talking on them.
	And also, QAnon is stupid, so let's keep talking about them.
	QAnon taking shots also this week at... is it Vivec?
	Vivec?
	Vivec Remeswami.
	Okay, Vivec Remeswami.
	What a cool name for a loser.
	I know!
	Uh, so yeah, I guess QAnon continues to be- QAnon's just got beef, you know?
	They answered the question of where the beef is, and it's here.
	Mike, what's up with the QAnon v Vivek Ramaswamy beef?
	Okay, so- That sounds like a delightful meal.
	I'd like one of those, please.
	So we'll get a, we'll get a Vivek lightly toasted.
	It'll be delicious.
	So our boy Vivek had another moment at the debate last night where he said that the 2020 election was stolen and hyped the Great Replacement and had white nationalists, uh, reposted a message on Twitter where a white nationalist was celebrating him.
	And it had like Nick Fuentes doing like the soy face where Nick Fuentes was like, Oh!
	She said it!
	The Great Replacement!
	So there was a segment of QAnon that was just like, oh man, Vivek's speaking truth to power.
	He's telling it like it is.
	But then there's a second group of QAnon who are just like, you know what Vivek's trying to do here?
	He's trying to steal Trump's thunder.
	He's trying to out-Trump Trump.
	Don't accept this, patriots.
	Vivek the Deceiver is trying to lure you away from our only hope for salvation, one Donald J. Trump.
	So reject Vivek and his silver tongue and his honeycombed lies and stick with the tried and true hero of the world, Donald Trump.
	Which, it just makes me laugh so much that Vivek's going so hard for the QAnon conspiracy nutball voter block.
	And their reaction to him is, I kind of like him, but he might be trying to do this to get one up on Trump.
	And I can't, I can't accept that.
	That ain't cool.
	That ain't good.
	Because Trump's the only white man that will beat the deep state.
	So thanks, but no thanks, Vivek.
	Wow, this Vivek post that he shared with FuentesSoyFacing, it's got layers.
	It was a Keith Woods post, who is another white supremacist, sharing just FuentesSoyFacing over his Great Replacement comments, and Vivek shared it.
	That's a lot of white supremacy in one tweet.
	It's like a turducken.
	You had Vivek retweeting a neo-Nazi, posting another neo-Nazi reacting.
	It's neo-Nazis all the way down.
	Yeah, you got Canadian neo-Nazi, you got the... I think he's from Illinois neo-Nazi, and then it's like Vivek's like, I like it both.
	I like it both.
	Yeah.
	Guys, you can just call them blue checks.
	It's fine.
	Yes, that's great.
	You know, you're so right.
	Neo-Nazi, it's like twice as many syllables.
	It's just real quick and to the point.
	Blue checks.
	Blue checks.
	That's so true.
	Oh, wait, Fuentes isn't checked, but... Unchecked, wow.
	Yeah, it's because he's secret, technically, right now on Twitter.
	Oh yeah, like basically Nick Fuentes just posts, he makes new accounts every like day where it's just like some adjective slash griper and then everyone knows it's him and then Elon eventually after 48 hours bans him because he's totally banned from the platform.
	This one's been lasting a while, this new one.
	It's been since May.
	So it seems like Elon's decided to just be like, we'll just pretend like I don't know and keep him on.
	He was talking about bringing Alex Jones back today.
	Did you see that?
	Oh, well, that's because Alex was doing Tucker.
	Yeah.
	And the quartering asked, like, is he going to be back, Elon?
	And Elon was like, I'm going to reply to the quartering because that's someone I should talk to.
	And he's like, I'm seriously considering it, actually.
	I don't think anyone should be permanently banned on here, which is bullshit, but...
	Like, Elon literally did this thing where he was like, Alex Jones made fun of murdered babies, and I held my dead baby in my hands, and that just crosses the line, so I can't let Alex back.
	And now he's just like, now let Alex back.
	Excuse me, Mr. Musk, that story was very sad.
	What was the name of the baby?
	Baby number two?
	X Alpha Epsilon?
	Damn, that was it.
	Fuck, got it.
	He's got us again, that Wiley Musk.
	We'll get him one of these days.
	Mike and I were making fun of Elon off the air.
	Deleting bonus content for nobody but just the two of us.
	And I was just like, wow.
	Elon Musk seems like he really likes the cyberpunk look, but he doesn't know shit about what cyberpunk is about.
	He's such a complete moron.
	I hate his guts.
	Yeah, because he and I and Miles Strong were like sobbing over like GTA 6.
	And they were just like, Oh, you have to kill cops in this game.
	That's totally uncool.
	I couldn't even get past the first scene because you got to kill a cop to get past it.
	Okay, nerd.
	Like, shut up.
	Shut up!
	It's also, like, transparently a lie.
	Like, I've seen... I've seen photographic evidence of that guy, like, holding a katana and wearing, like, a leather trench coat.
	And, like, I've seen him before.
	His hair plugs.
	That dude has played video games where he's shot cops, for sure.
	He loves it.
	He couldn't get enough of it back in the day.
	When Grand Theft Auto III came out for the PlayStation 2, when he wasn't busy jerking it to underage girls or whatever, a comedy show, allegedly, Uh, all the stuff I had to say to not get sued.
	Whatever.
	One million dollars, rancid penis, etc.
	But back in the day, he was loving it.
	He couldn't get enough of Grand Theft Auto III.
	He was like, put down the Vaseline so I can kill these cops real quick.
	Okay, sweet.
	Now it's back to watching Tichi Buyo and stroking it, or whatever.
	And you know what, Elon?
	I was that guy, too.
	You know?
	I was right there in the trenches with you.
	What?
	I didn't say any of that.
	That was never me.
	I would like the record to show that I never understood jerking off to anime girls.
	And people had community notes for Ian Miles Chong showing that he reviewed Grand Theft Auto 5 relentlessly, and he absolutely was murdering cops left and right back in his before.
	Yeah, dude, he couldn't wait to fucking give them the money for Shark Cash and do a stunt race right into a cop HQ.
	He loved it.
	He was like, dude, you can get a speed boost on this track if you rocket launcher this police helicopter in midair.
	It's so fun.
	It's like, come on, guys.
	Who the fuck are you kidding?
	Yeah.
	Elon Musk, you cannot make a truck that ugly and not want to kill cops.
	I'm just going to say it.
	I don't know what the correlation is, but you can't do it.
	I saw one in person for the first time like a week ago.
	Have you guys seen one in person yet?
	Nope.
	It is ugly as... The pictures do not do it justice and it's just a little ridiculous.
	All the cars, you could tell that everybody was taking photos because it was on the freeway and it was just like a congestion happening around the Cybertruck because everybody was clearly taking a photo outside their window of this thing.
	It's awesome when your car is so hideous, people are gawking at it before you get into an accident.
	People are like, oh my god, someone actually bought one of those fucking things.
	Can you believe it?
	Yeah, I mean, it is sort of a status symbol, but for a status you don't want.
	You know what I mean?
	It's a status symbol in the same way that driving around in Hitler's car would be a status symbol.
	It's like, yeah, you had the money to afford that.
	And also, what a choice you've made, you know?
	That's a fun one.
	It's not like a Tesla, how some people are just like, fuck, I still have my Tesla, after Elon completely went bonkers.
	But, like, the Cybertruck, it's like, that's post-Elon going completely mask-off.
	You, at this point, just want it because it's the Elon symbol.
	Also, like, I mean, the Tesla was an easier sell because Tesla didn't look like you took a regular vehicle and then put, like, a fucking Nintendo Labo kit on top of it.
	It's fucking unreal, like...
	The Tesla Cybertruck somehow has, like, you know, low-res polygons.
	It's like, it's just, it's on a CRT in real life.
	It's weird.
	It's like, huh.
	It's like, holy shit, is Laura Croft driving that thing?
	What the fuck?
	Laura Croft was in my head the whole time, yes.
	It's just like, oh my god, it's so silly.
	My god, it's Andross.
	It just... oh man.
	The best part was the videos of the crash at like 35 miles an hour where they're testing it.
	It's just like, oh yeah, if you get into the slightest accident in this car, you're dead.
	There's like no crumple zones, like all the force of the crash goes directly to you.
	The back wheel flies off for some reason.
	That was so funny.
	35 miles an hour.
	Imagine a crash where you're actually driving at like highway speeds.
	You're just dead.
	There's just no two ways about it.
	It's, it's literally, Elon had that underwater coffin for those kids that were trapped in that cave in the Philippines.
	He's now created his above ground coffin for the rest of us.
	It's just like I think somehow Simultaneity looks incredibly cheap and indestructible.
	You know what I mean?
	Like the aggro crag.
	You're just like, oh my god, I don't know how they make it look so imposing because it's very obviously just made of sticks.
	You know what I mean?
	It's like aluminum over nothing or whatever.
	I can't wait to see one of those get into an accident.
	It's going to be truly spectacular.
	What's going to be awesome is that the car, from what it looked like from the crash test, the actual frame of the car will look undamaged, and then the people inside the car will just be liquid.
	They'll just be actual red jello.
	Because that's what's going to happen!
	It's like crashing a cheese grater at 90 miles an hour.
	It's so cute!
	That's awful.
	And then it's going to be hard to get them out if it actually is like...
	The shit where you need to have a phone that's connected to the internet to open the doors or to open the fucking glove compartment?
	It's a good design.
	You take your Cybertruck out to go hiking and now you're just out of reception range so you can't get back in your Cybertruck after your hike.
	Oh my god.
	If you do get back to it, it probably just doesn't work, you know?
	Because it just looks shitty.
	It just looks like it's a bad investment.
	I don't know.
	I'm no carologist.
	I just love that Elon did this whole thing where he was like, this is the car for the post-apocalypse.
	And it's like, you mean the car that after like four hours you have to find a charging station to reactivate it?
	That's your plan for the apocalypse?
	Is to have to stop every few hours to refuel?
	Yeah, but his idea of the post-apocalypse is cyberpunk, except everyone is white, but they're still appropriating Asian culture.
	It's everything he ever dreamed of.
	He has two katanas for every zero katanas that he has now.
	He's like, man, for every moment I have to spit with zero katanas in my hand, I'm gonna live life to the fullest of the future with two katanas.
	What a goober.
	Anyway, let's stop talking about it because he sucks.
	And we'll move on.
	I guess it's not quite boosh and it's not quite news.
	Arizona gives us the blues.
	Now it's time for Haley's views on Arizona.
	That was so good.
	That was beautiful.
	Rhyme over.
	It was beautiful.
	Anyway, yeah, let's turn it over to Haley, aka Arizona Right Watch, to tell us what's going on with her flaming dumpster of a state this week.
	Um, well, um, um, let's go, let's start with Derek Chauvin getting absolutely Swiss cheesed in a Tucson prison.
	Did you guys hear about this?
	Yes.
	El, did you hear about this?
	Oh yeah, this one, this one I did somehow manage to actually see.
	And yeah, I was like, I was like, bully for this headline.
	I was like, I was like, this headline makes me feel positive in a way.
	I'm not saying anything whatsoever, but this is actually Arizona news, even though Derek Chauvin, the police officer, for those of you who somehow don't remember, lynched George Floyd.
	I think we could use that word, right?
	Lynched.
	He had his knee on his neck for nine minutes.
	We'll call it whatever you want.
	Murder.
	He was actually convicted.
	Yeah, I was going to go with murder.
	I was just going to go with murder.
	Yeah, he's a murderer.
	Anyways, that didn't occur in Arizona, but he got his ass sent to Arizona because a lot of prisoners get sent to Arizona because we're just a big open desert with a lot of space to put prisons in.
	We even have a whole town that's basically just for prisons.
	So you got Death Row out there, you got a women's prison out there, you got a men's prison out there, and then also you can go to Country Thunder, which is a big music festival we have.
	So that's fun, you know?
	It's a weird town.
	There's only like one road in too so you gotta go through like this.
	Trump actually was at the the location where they have the country show in this prison town so I went when Trump was here and it's like this 22 mile road to get in there that's just like the one road in one road out so it's like it's kind of a creepy it's kind of a creepy area.
	But yeah, so Derek Chauvin was in a Tucson prison.
	It was a medium security prison and we've been having a lot of incidents here where there's been obviously corruption in the jails and a lot of suicides.
	This was not a conversation until Chauvin got shanked and now local media is like, why are our prisons so bad?
	So anyway, he was just making some copies on the copy machine.
	And this man, John Terskak.
	John Terskak.
	I don't know what, like, I'm not sure if it's in the pocket of names I'm allowed to make fun of, because I don't know what ethnic.
	He's a white guy.
	Oh, so if he's, like, Polish or whatever, they're like, yeah, whatever.
	You're almost totally right about that!
	What a crazy name!
	I mean, so I have the good fortune of knowing many Polish people, so I could look at one of those names and just be like, oh, wow, this is Polish.
	There's like a C next to a Y next to two Z's or something crazy.
	So anyway, he got up behind Chauvin and stabbed him 22 times.
	It was on Black Friday.
	There was reports, like, actually from, like, the, you know, FBI agents that interviewed Terskak that he did it on Black Friday as, like, a way to honor Black Lives Matter and also the Black Hand
	symbol which is associated with the Mexican Mafia which he was apparently a member of even
	though he's a white guy.
	Yeah he was like a FBI informant so I can you can probably see where this is now going.
	The fact that he was an FBI informant, he was serving a decades long sentence, all the right is now like, oh, FBI informant and they tried to kill Chauvin?
	Just like they tried to kill Epstein?
	Interesting.
	Well, if that's the case, then why didn't the FBI inform him on how to finish a job?
	I mean, sorry, I didn't say that.
	Literally.
	That's not a thing that I said.
	Uh, yeah, I mean, obviously, of course it's an inside job.
	Nobody dies in prison without it being a conspiracy.
	Prison is a very safe place for very friendly people.
	Yeah, people don't kill cops in prison.
	Nobody ever kills cops in prison.
	But it's funny that, like, the right is kind of, they don't really have a story here.
	They're just kind of like FBI informant.
	That's a little suspicious, you know?
	That's all they need.
	Yeah, that's all they need.
	So the FBI tried to kill Derek Chauvin.
	The extended conspiracy is kind of like they wanted to shut him up because he was going to get the truth out about the fact that, you know, the conspiracies that existed when George Floyd was initially murdered.
	How they said, like, He actually took fentanyl somehow in between that time when he was getting murdered for nearly 10 minutes.
	Um, and there was like some extension of that conspiracy with this.
	They were like, he was targeted by the feds so that they can hide the fact that he was framed, uh, for, because George Floyd actually took fentanyl.
	And it's like, why would the F what is it?
	This isn't a, this is a really deep conspiracy, you know, but it's because they had, they framed Whitey.
	Chauvin. That's kind of so it's like that's the FBI covering up the fact that they framed him kind of thing.
	But they didn't do a good job because they didn't kill him even though they stabbed him 22 times.
	What do you think, Mike?
	I had a guy post about how this Derek Chauvin stabbing was to cover up the explosive truth
	that was about to be revealed about what happened in this case. And I made a post about how this guy
	is super mad that a cop was held accountable for killing a black man.
	And this guy came at me and was like, why are you bringing race into this, bro?
	And I just said to him, how is Derek Chauvin a political prisoner in a situation that doesn't involve race?
	And the guy just would not answer me on that point.
	He just was like, well, I don't know what the person you were quoting had to mean by what they were saying, but you're the one that made it racial.
	Yeah, how dare you racially motivate this?
	He's just a regular murderer.
	He's just a regular old-fashioned murderer.
	He just murdered a guy on camera.
	We all saw him murder the guy.
	And it wasn't racially motivated at all.
	Wink.
	Nope.
	Winky-do, yes.
	But he survived, so, you know, there's always a second chance, I guess.
	You mean add a long life for this poor fellow?
	Yep, that's what we're all about.
	Derek Chauvin just serving his time peacefully.
	Man, if his time in prison wasn't already nerve-wracking, at this point, it's got to be pretty unpleasant, which makes me smile.
	Yeah, he's still got a long time to go.
	I want that experience to be kind of maximum unpleasant for him.
	Yeah.
	I like, I still see people talking about how like, the George Floyd thing was just a false flag.
	They were all actors.
	And I'm like, wow, Derek Chauvin's in there.
	What a performance artist that guy is.
	What a method actor he is, that's spending the next like 15 odd years in jail and now being brutally assaulted and almost killed.
	This guy's really committing to the pit.
	Like, bully for you there, actor Chauvin.
	Yeah, he got the shit into the stick in that acting job.
	Oh, sorry, go ahead.
	No, the guy that played George Floyd is like, just doing Mai Tais in the Bahamas, just thinking having been killed.
	I mean, he obviously got the cherry roll there.
	That part was real.
	Unfortunately.
	It turns out that in America, it's actually just cheaper to kill a black person.
	Like it's, I mean, it's just, that's just the way the money works out.
	Fuck this country.
	Anyways, yeah, fuck this country.
	That was just the first boosh Arizona item.
	Let's move on to new Arizona bidness.
	Hayley, what else you got for us?
	Uh, just a real quick update because I talked about it twice on this podcast with that ASU, that Arizona State University professor that was, uh, he was assaulted by two Turning Point USA, like, propagandists.
	Um, they just got charged actually, like, a couple days ago, a few days ago.
	Um, it's Caelan De Almeida who does the front lines, um, like, video work for Turning Point USA.
	and his camera guy um which this is a funny story so his camera guy is named Brayden Joel Ellis they got the wrong Brayden Ellis when they initially charged these uh when they initially filed these charges this is the Maricopa Attorney's Office this is like the highest it's just like dog how are you gonna get the freaking name Wrong.
	You look up Turning Point people and they have their badge in their photo.
	That's how I found him.
	I was like, oh, OK, we got the name.
	Let me look him up.
	I'm like, they got this name wrong.
	They didn't get the name right because I have a different name.
	And it's like he's got a photo in his Twitter with his Turning Point badge with his name on it.
	It's like, how is how are you guys this bad?
	Anyways, I'm not afraid to be the one to say it.
	I think it's fucked up.
	There are two Brayden Ellis's.
	And in addition to that, I think that white people must be stopped.
	Hm?
	Brayden?
	Ugh.
	God.
	Brayden.
	Ugh.
	Ugh.
	You're not a fan of the name Brayden?
	Ugh.
	Ugh.
	I could make that news for the rest of the show and it would be accurate.
	I don't know, man.
	That's like a fucking, my mom is yelling over our parking spot as she's leaving, dropping me off at my lacrosse game name.
	Brayden and Kalen.
	Ugh, yuck.
	That family takes Christmas photos with their ARs.
	Definitely.
	Absolutely.
	So anyway, they got charged.
	If that's the update for all you listeners who actually cared about that story, that's kind of fun, right?
	Turning Point USA guys actually getting something that might come to them.
	Charlie's crying about it, so that makes me a little happy.
	We'll get like a ton of good news on this show.
	I know!
	Two positive Arizona stories this week.
	You're welcome.
	Don't make a habit out of it.
	We gave you that part of the segment because your state is supposed to suck.
	I mean technically I guess it is bad that our prison system is so awful that like we do have a lot of prisoners who do get assaulted pretty bad in our system.
	I'm sorry.
	So I guess it's like, there's the bad.
	There's the bad lining of it.
	If you need the bad lining, the prison system is bad.
	But, you know, I'm not going to cry a tear over Chauvin.
	So, lol.
	It's okay.
	Sorry.
	I didn't mean to shout you down while you were trying to defend your best friend, Darren Chauvin.
	Okay.
	Any other Arizona-related topics for the week?
	Nah.
	Alright, cool.
	Fuck Arizona.
	On to the headline news!
	From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News!
	Don't worry, guys.
	Daddy Trump is only going to be a dictator for one day when he gets re-elected.
	And then after that, he'll turn the reins loose.
	He promises.
	So that's an insane thing that Donald Trump actually said.
	I'm sure there's more to it.
	And for the more, I'll toss it over to Mike.
	But what an absolutely fucking insane thing for people to hear and still support this man, wouldn't you think?
	Oh, yeah, this was really awesome.
	And the best part about it was, is that if you watch all these Trump interviews that have been happening for the last year, You can just tell the interviewer is so desperate for Trump to not fuck it up.
	The interviewer has to literally try to tee the ball up as gingerly as possible for Trump to then swing the bat at it, to try to hit it.
	And Hannity was like, no, no, Mr. President, Mr. Trump.
	You, a lot of people are saying some totally crazy stuff.
	They're just, I mean, nonsense.
	And they're talking about you becoming a dictator or not abiding by the rule of law.
	So, I mean, you're not going to do that, right?
	And then Trump replies that like, yeah, I'm not going to be a dictator except for day one.
	And Trump very obviously sees Hannity's reaction and Trump is just like, oh, he thinks I'm going crazy.
	Trump just loves it.
	He just loves that these people just try to kid glove him so much and they try to make him say the right thing.
	And Trump's just like, you know what?
	I'm just not going to say the right thing.
	Fuck it.
	I don't care.
	I've been president.
	I wield ridiculous power.
	I control these assholes and their fake news channel.
	I'm going to be the Republican nominee.
	nominee if I don't drop dead. So I'll just say whatever I want and you can all go to
	hell." So he just did it. He just literally declared that on day one he'll be a dictator
	and what are you going to do about it, Hannity? Are you going to push back? Are you going
	to tell me that's a bad thing? Of course you're not.
	No, he's going to pucker up on day one.
	Right. Yep.
	Pucker up and kiss my orange ass, you, you like, you simp, you little weak man.
	I mean, it's just, it's just that it's just like Trump loves wielding power over people.
	And so that's what he did.
	And I mean, this is so it's bad politics and it's incredibly stupid for him to say this as an immediate soundbite for the Democrats to use the general election.
	Uh, they had Kash Patel on Steve Bannon's show, and Kash was like, yeah, I'm gonna be running the CIA, and I'm just gonna throw anyone I don't like in jail, because fuck them.
	And that's just the way it's gonna be.
	And like, if you look at me cross-eyed, you go to fucking jail.
	Basically, Kash Patel was the fucking guy from Community, only it was just like, if you fuck with me, jail.
	Just like, it's like...
	Mike, I hate to do this to you, but that's actually Parks and Recreation.
	Fair, fair.
	I can accept that.
	I'm out of touch with my pop culture references.
	I don't know.
	I don't watch either.
	If I didn't do it, one of our listeners might, and I didn't want you to have to suffer through that.
	We'd have to correct next episode.
	It'd be a whole thing.
	Oh, that's never going to happen.
	If I accidentally get something wrong on the show, then that's just how that's going to be.
	So you literally have Trump and one of his minions just Brazenly stating, yeah, we're just going to fuck everybody up when we get back in.
	And you have Project 2025 on their website, which is again, just a literal blueprint of here is how we are going to crush the American Republic once we take the reins of power again.
	And so.
	I like that Bannon called Hannity the idiot for asking the question.
	He was like, he was the idiot for asking Trump this question.
	Now's not the time for these stupid questions.
	He was like shitting on Hannity.
	He's like, Sean, don't don't even get within 20 miles of that shit, bro.
	He said, this is a funny quote, actually.
	Even to ask that question shows you're an idiot.
	And we don't have time for idiots, bro.
	This is war.
	Chill.
	Yo, chill.
	Yeah, everybody needs to calm down.
	None of y'all are going to be the nominee for president.
	So everybody, let's just calm down.
	I really liked Chris Christie and the debate.
	He was my favorite.
	Dude, he pulled out the playbook that Mike and I have been talking about forever, but way too little and way too late and with no juice going into it.
	That shit is not going to work.
	You had to be DeSantos at the height of his power, and then maybe you could pull off the... You know who sucks, actually, and is a weak, stupid loser?
	Donald Trump.
	Fuck that guy.
	Like, nobody cares if Chris Christie's saying that.
	Like, you know, Chris Christie's sweatily saying, Donald Trump kind of sucks, right?
	Like, on stage, surrounded by a bunch of losers that Donald Trump does not have to debate because they are all losers.
	Like, it's just insane.
	I love the state of politics in my country.
	Yeah, everyone was calling him fat and he's so used to it.
	It's like, you're not going to hurt him by calling him fat.
	He goes to the beach with that body.
	I've had to deal with this for 30 years or whatever.
	They're just like, man, you're fat.
	I'm just like, dude, yeah, obviously.
	You think it's breaking news to me or something?
	Dude, I don't get to go on rides at a theme park.
	Those are just not for me anymore.
	I haven't been for a long time.
	Yeah, I know.
	Yeah, you're not gonna insult Christy by calling him fat.
	He doesn't care.
	They brought up the Obama hug thing again.
	Vivek was like, you hugged Obama.
	Go back and hug Obama.
	Like, he's never gonna live that one down.
	You hugged Obama.
	Again, this is excellent, excellent top-level politics.
	I know it is.
	It's like, man, these people really care about the people.
	Stop rapping those Eminem lyrics for enough time to let me tell you that it's okay that I hugged Obama because I'm not gay.
	And it's just like, big crowd pop.
	It's just like, okay, cool.
	What an incredible time we live in, you know?
	Everybody shut up and stop pretending like you're going to defeat Donald Trump.
	There's a reason he's not showing up for these fights.
	I hate saying that he was right about something, but when he was just like, why would I ever debate these people?
	I don't have to do that.
	He could not have been more correct.
	So funny.
	Very true.
	Very true.
	Anyway, we sort of got all over the map because I started talking about the debate where we were supposed to be talking about Trump being a dictator for a day, but I just couldn't resist.
	Some people want it.
	They're excited for the daddy dictator.
	Oh yeah, the QAnon lives only for this shit.
	I see so many people posting stuff where they're like, the libs are trying to call him a dictator when all he's going to do is bring justice and truth to the world and they're not going to buy the dictator lie because Biden's fascist regime has been oppressing them for the last four years.
	And it's like, who of you have gone to jail for, like, who is the Biden DOJ putting in jail for whatever reasons?
	How are you oppressed?
	Like, what happened to you that's made you sad, other than the fact that your orange daddy lost in an election?
	They heard that people in a state far away could get gender-affirming care, and that is how they are oppressed, Mike.
	Oh, right, right, right.
	That's absolutely heartbreaking.
	Absolutely heartbreaking.
	You'll never know how they struggle with dealing with the fact that other people are dealing with stuff.
	Yep.
	They're like, yeah, they might have problems, but they talk about it a lot.
	And I don't like that, you know?
	I got other shit to deal with.
	So I don't want to hear him talk about it no more.
	And I think we should just kill, I mean, get rid of all of them.
	Oh yeah, that was the great thing in the debate was when Nikki Haley, who's trying to position herself as the moderate, sensible alternative to all the nuts, was just like, I think DeSantis' Don't Say Gay Bill didn't go far enough.
	I think we need to hate gay people more.
	And it's just like, oh, wow.
	Wow, really?
	This is where we're at now?
	That's a cool debate.
	That's cool.
	It was super great.
	And also, again, GOP hypocrisy at its finest.
	Hillary Clinton is the worst because she's a miserable shrew.
	But did I have to listen to that lady talk?
	Jesus Christ.
	Get out of here.
	She's like a Harry Potter villain.
	JK Rowling wrote that lady.
	At any moment, she's going to jump on her broom and fly away.
	And she's taking your rights with her.
	Anyway, good stuff.
	You know, I for one really hope that all of the people that do vote for Donald Trump get exactly what they want if he somehow manages to actually become dictator of our country.
	You know, I keep saying that things are impossible.
	Live Action One Piece Show couldn't possibly be good.
	Like, never thought that I'd like Jack Harlow.
	You know, just a bunch of weird shit happening all at once.
	Yeah, maybe our country will just fall into the hands of that guy from the fucking show where he would say, you're fired.
	Seems like it's as good a thing as anything else, you know?
	Who knows what happens anymore?
	The future is... confusing.
	We're only around for 20 years anyway before the fucking, like, ice cap melts and the giant tsunami kills all of us, so... It's like... Oh God.
	Yeah.
	Is that, can that be what I'm looking forward to this week?
	Yes, that's fine.
	Oblivion's cold embrace releasing you from this terrible burden.
	That's absolutely a fine thing to look forward to.
	I regret mentioning it, because I'm so thirsty.
	Like, I'm thinking in my mind right now, it's like a huge tsunami of water, and I'm just like, man, that sounds incredible.
	And Hayley's just like, oh, I'm just gonna sip on my fucking drink in front of you, like a d-bag of thanks!
	Get some water.
	Go get some water.
	I'm recording.
	I have water.
	Professionally.
	I'm not professional enough to have water on hand.
	I'm sorry.
	If I was really feisty, I would have brought my sparkling water to my desk before we started recording.
	But unfortunately, I only have my regular water nearby.
	So boo me.
	Yeah, you know what?
	I wish nothing but the best for both of you.
	That's how I feel right now, with your bragging about your water on hand.
	Anyway, so we're not quite done with our good news for the week yet, because now we get to talk about George Santos getting the fucking poot, which I guess is only kind of good news, because it turns out that he's already parlaying that into a better or lucrative career, at least in the short term.
	Cameo?
	Well, I was going to toss over to Mike for the big reveal, but yes, cameo.
	Oh, okay.
	Mike, I'm going to throw it over to you now for smaller reveals.
	Give us more information.
	I'm sorry.
	So, after having been not expelled from Congress the last time they tried this, the Ethics Report came out, and yeah, it turns out he's a huge piece of shit who did all the kinds of terrible things.
	I think he's fun.
	I was like, yeah, that sounds fun.
	But, uh, you know, not with my, not with the taxpayer dollar.
	Sure.
	Yeah.
	So yeah, our boy Santos, uh, decided that it was, uh, he had done enough crimes.
	And now this time after the ethics report came out, the house representatives decided, you know what?
	Like goodbye, good sir.
	So they expelled him and that's the end of George Santos, his career in Congress.
	I thought he was going to make it the full way.
	I thought the Republicans were way too spineless to actually do this, but they pulled it off.
	Congrats, question mark, Republicans, I guess.
	What's really funny about this- Because he's gay, they were like, we can get rid of that one.
	Well, apparently there's a bunch of resignations happening, and McCarthy is going to quit by the end of the year.
	So people are talking about how the fact that Republicans now, at the end of the year, they're going to have a one-seat majority in the House.
	So they are literally one Republican incumbent death away from having a tied House, which Who could lead to all kinds of nonsense.
	So who knows?
	I mean, Republicans are managing to squander away their four-seat majority through resignations and crimes and all kinds of other good stuff.
	Besides going on to cameo, Santos is now also deciding that on his way out the door, he's just going to throw bags of shit at everyone he can.
	Santos filed numerous ethics complaints against various other Republicans accusing them of insider trading and that they're using their knowledge through lawmaking to know what stocks to pick and what stocks to avoid.
	So again, great job, George.
	Just don't leave with any tact or dignity.
	Just literally light the place on fire on your way out the door.
	He's fun.
	I'm convinced he's fun.
	Dude, get him and Rittenhouse in a Jell-O ring.
	It sounds like it's hugely profitable.
	He's trying to sell a book right now.
	He could probably use the promotion.
	Oh, speaking of Rittenhouse, did you see those photos they're making around where he looks like Bob's Burger Boy or whatever, like straight up?
	It's like not even, it's like actually fucking hysterical.
	Like he genuinely looks like fucking Bob's Burger or whatever Big Boy or whatever that fucking mascot is.
	He's got like a cowlick and everything.
	It's insane.
	Oh, yeah, he has such a weirdly cherubic face now.
	Every time you see him, his face is really red.
	And he has like you get you can tell that like in that photo, he's like shaking Tucker Carlson's head and you can tell that Tucker Carlson now has contempt for him because he is fat.
	It's great.
	I love that picture.
	It's so really You can just tell, like body posture wise, like, you know, it's one of those things where it's just like, you know, freshen up.
	Yeah, straight line and slanted line, totally cucked, data or whatever, same shit.
	I guess that's why he's not headlining Turning Point's America Fest this year.
	I noticed he wasn't on the bill.
	And he was the headliner the last couple of years.
	Well yeah because if he's there then who's gonna be at the centerpiece of the Christmas table with an apple in their
	mouth?
	He really does have a very weirdly paunchy belly.
	Like, I'm an overweight dude.
	I'm large.
	But with Rittenhouse, it's just sort of like he's pregnant.
	His tummy is just bulging.
	from like right where like right below your chest to like your stomach.
	There's like no added fat anywhere.
	It's just like literally Rittenhouse is just carrying a food baby in perpetuity
	in his large little tum tum.
	It's... he's very weirdly proportioned.
	He's a very strange looking person at this point.
	And he's a piece of shit.
	Yeah, oh and he's a murderer.
	Oh, if it wasn't a fucking murderer we wouldn't be talking about it being fat because who cares?
	But he's a murderer who took this fucking Bob's Burger Boy photo shaking hands with Tucker Carlson.
	So I mean, there we go.
	We get to talk about how you went from being like a fucking 17 year old regular looking average Caucasian kid to looking like a plastic 1950s burger mascot.
	Insane shit.
	The hair is not doing him any favors.
	Get a different haircut, man.
	It's just ridiculous.
	What are you doing?
	Do anything.
	Just get yourself back on the straight and narrow, kid.
	You're falling apart.
	Jeezy Pete. Anyway, yeah. So George Santos, it is a bummer that he just gets the safety net of getting to go to Cameo
	and just like getting to charge people through the nose to fucking to just say dumb shit and just get a quick bag. Oh
	yeah. It's powerful unfortunate that being shitty just gives you a short term avenue to success a lot of the time.
	Well, I mean, he is facing lots of legal ramifications so he is going to actually be in criminal court sooner rather
	than later.
	So I don't think this is going to go that well for him in the long run.
	So enjoy that cameo.
	Spend that cameo money while you can, George, because... He's charging $250 a video, I think.
	That's a lot of money for a cameo.
	Can we get together like the $700 or whatever it would take to get him to just redo all of our bumps?
	Oh, that's great!
	Listeners, fund our bumps.
	Yeah, hell yeah!
	Listeners, fund my bumps!
	The real question is, is after we get the giant bag for our bumps, do we have Santos to it, or do we get Rudy?
	Because Rudy's a long-time Cameo.
	If I get a giant bag for my bumps, I am doing them.
	You're just pocketing the money.
	Yeah, and he's doing cocaine.
	That was a good joke.
	I was making a cocaine joke.
	I was talking about the use of cocaine.
	Yes.
	That joke was about cocaine.
	Get in a bag for your bumps.
	Yeah, I got it.
	I did get it now.
	Like the drug cocaine?
	Like sugar?
	And then the rest of the podcast is that.
	It's just, it's just...
	Coming up with different names for cocaine for like fucking 30 more minutes.
	My favorite term was Colombian marching powder.
	I just really got a chuckle out of that for cocaine.
	Santos, be on the podcast.
	Yeah.
	If you're listening, George Santos, be on the podcast.
	Yeah, come on in.
	That'd be great.
	I mean, honestly, come on the podcast, but only if you'll let me ask you about the cool parts of your life, like your drag shit, that I'm actually interested in.
	Like, I don't give a fuck about you.
	Like, unless you're... If George Sandler's supposed to come on the show and let us ask him point blank about his crimes, then that's also acceptable, but I don't think he would.
	So at least let us ask you about your drag.
	That's cool!
	Yeah.
	Oh, that'd be awesome if he just opened up and admitted he was a drag queen.
	That'd be great.
	He's free now.
	He doesn't have to.
	Can you imagine how pissed off people would be if we scooped that from like... There's gotta be a million drag queen podcasts out there, right?
	Like RuPaul probably got a podcast and we're the ones who scooped the George Santos just being like, okay, you have a drag queen and here's my life in Brazil.
	And we're just like, oh!
	We did it!
	We scooped him!
	Way to go, Team Us.
	I can just imagine, like, the doorbell rings and you open it up and there's just like a couple of large but incredibly fetching drag women out there.
	They just fucking tune you up real good.
	I deserve this, I say as I'm being smashed by their... They're just fucking smashing you in crazy platform boots and shit.
	Yes, as I'm being pummeled by their very heavy yet elegant purses.
	So that's... I love drag queens.
	I'm so glad that they got, like, popular enough to be condemned by the right wing outright.
	That's how you know you've made it, when they start actually gunning for you.
	Yeah, I actually saw, I was, I was going out, and I was looking around in, you know, near the canal, where there's a lot of graffiti.
	And I saw some stickers out there in the graffiti area, and it was like a local drag queen.
	I was like, hell yeah, the drag queen's getting on vandalism culture.
	You know?
	Nice.
	We love to see it, you know?
	Speaking of which, I saw a confusing bit of graffito tagging on my commute to work the other day.
	I'm going to make up a name to protect the potentially innocent here, so we'll just say Trisha.
	And the graffito tag just said, Trisha is a hoe.
	Tent city.
	She is cheap.
	And I was just like, is this slander or an advertisement?
	Like, I don't know.
	I don't know how to read this.
	Either way, I'm not really interested in it, but I do have to look at it because somebody has written it where I can read it.
	So I was puzzled by it when I approached it.
	I was like, huh, huh.
	And that's the little spice of life that you have to hold on to, people.
	Allow yourself to be charmed by weird graffiti.
	Everybody's free to wear sunscreen.
	Remember that Baz Luhrmann thing?
	There's a reference for you.
	Yeah, not even Mike remembers everybody's free to wear sunscreen.
	Nope.
	Do you remember No Sex in the Champagne Room?
	I do remember that, yes.
	And you didn't know that No Sex in the Champagne Room is a Chris Rock parody of the Baz Luhrmann song, Everyone's Free to Wear Sunscreen?
	Nope, did not know that.
	Unreal.
	I'm being brought up to speed.
	I had no earthly concept of that.
	Well, there you go.
	There's your little weird fact.
	Take that one to the bank.
	I will.
	I guess.
	Genuinely, I don't know why, but that little bit of conversation genuinely shorted out my brain for a moment.
	I started thinking about the exploding hearts for some reason.
	I don't know what's going on.
	Like, everybody in that band except for one guy died in 2002.
	So, I don't know why I was thinking about that all of a sudden.
	Very strange.
	Are we done talking about Santos?
	Is it time for our mailbag?
	That sounds right to me.
	Let's move along.
	Let's try to get our brains back in the game.
	Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
	It's time for Q and A. Look, at the very least, because we're too lazy to edit the podcast to such a degree, that last thing I said will stay in, and hopefully it will lead some people to listening to The Exploding Hearts, because they do rule.
	But most of them are very dead.
	So don't expect another album.
	That tragedy happened like 20 years ago.
	So, you're not getting that one.
	No, probably not.
	Eric, the Deep State Operative, asks, is there a Q-related conspiracy that you kind of wish was real?
	For instance, MedBeds.
	I mean, MedBeds is a fucking great choice.
	That would be sick, right?
	That would be incredible.
	The Matt Damon Elysium-style MedBed, you just lay in it, it cures all your stiffs.
	That would be fucking gas.
	But, you know.
	The QAnon conspiracy theory is not wrong.
	It is only going to be available to the hyper-rich.
	I agree.
	I think the med-bed Elysium thing is accurate.
	Only the rich people would get it.
	Can I say, because we were talking about it this episode, I just want the fur meant to be real.
	I have no reason for this, honestly.
	What about the rest of the Flat Earth?
	Sure.
	That'd be funny.
	Sure.
	As long as the firmament is real, though.
	You don't care about the shape of the Earth?
	Not really.
	But I do think it would be funny.
	It's just funny to think of us in a globe.
	You know, like, kind of a globe situation.
	Like, that's a weird way to think of our reality.
	And like Flat Earther, you lost me.
	It's a dome at best.
	We don't talk about globes here.
	Can we break?
	Oh, you're right.
	I'm sorry that I said the word globe.
	That seems a little offensive.
	Yeah, but you know what I mean?
	Like a snow globe, but not like an earth globe.
	I'm sorry.
	I mean, earthers.
	Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
	Hesitant.
	I told you all spheres are fake.
	There's just no.
	Yeah, that that shape, it doesn't exist.
	Show me a sphere in nature.
	I fucking dare you.
	Wow.
	Well, I would like that theory to be real for no reason, except I think it would be funny that flat earthers are right, and that the firmament is a real thing.
	That's why I want it to be real.
	So they're right.
	Old Q has a bunch of excellent shit, you know?
	Weird titanic nonsense, earthquake machines, like weather machine stuff, like all the cool psychic MK ultra nonsense.
	If most of what the old Q stuff, like those conspiracy theories were real, then life would probably be much cooler than it is now.
	Alas, life is very boring, and the monsters that we have to deal with are largely the regular type of monsters.
	Yeah, I would say that I'd be in favor of the project looking glass, like basically being able to gaze through time streams.
	Alice in Wonderland?
	Alice in Wonderland, yes!
	I just love the idea of the multiverse being a real thing, and that Q and his group are literally doing minority reports where they're gazing through the streams, trying to guide humanity to the right timeline where they achieve victory over the Deep State.
	You know, if they're doing that, this is really a sort of Avengers endgame.
	There's only one way to win.
	And in order to do that, we had to go through COVID.
	We had to go through Biden winning.
	It's like, the Deep State wins in all 15 billion analyses except for one.
	And it's like, man, do you really call this winning for Team Patriots if this is all the shit we're going through?
	Like, like maybe, maybe the deep state should just win slightly less.
	Can we find that timeline instead of just the one where it looks like we're getting crushed constantly?
	I guess the weather modification would also be good.
	Cause I live in Arizona, you know, I'd like to modify the weather a little bit more here.
	It's kind of hot this week.
	That's all I got.
	But I thought you loved it.
	I thought you were like, ooh, I love a hot... I mean, I do.
	I like the heat, but I don't like it when it's 120 for a month straight.
	Is it like the Arizona experience?
	During this last summer, it reached over 115 degrees for 30 days straight.
	It snowed yesterday.
	Yes.
	Yes, it did.
	That is what happened around here.
	It's like 80 degrees here.
	That's what's horrible.
	It's December.
	How do you get cozy?
	I am.
	I'm cold in 80 degrees.
	That's absolutely bonkers.
	I'll probably die if I go see you guys.
	I'm literally in sweats right now.
	I do trust you, but I saw nothing there.
	You contorted your body in a way that made it seem to indicate that you were doing a good thing.
	Can you see?
	Am I too short?
	Can you see sweats?
	Yep.
	Sweats.
	Because I'm cold.
	In 80 degrees.
	I mean, hey, you do you.
	Slay queen.
	I remember one of my first experiences in a Vegas winter was me being like, Oh God, it's cold.
	It's so cold.
	And then I realized, wait, I can't see my breath.
	So it's really not that cold.
	Nevada has just turned me into a sissy.
	I just can't, I just can't handle mild cold anymore.
	So it's like, it's all, It's all relative to where you are, basically.
	Yeah, it's all cool.
	If you ever come visit us in our frigid climes, then you will be mad cold.
	And if we ever come to visit you in your bacon climes, then we will be mad sweaty.
	Yep.
	That's just the way it is.
	Hey, Dallas was unacceptable for me.
	I mean, wow.
	So like Arizona would probably just be actual death.
	All right, Hayley, show us all of Arizona's most air-conditioned places.
	Let's go!
	Yes.
	And we will go to those places via the inside of your air-conditioned car, which is going to have air conditioning very much cranked up.
	Thank you.
	Well, you guys will just have to visit during like February.
	Yes.
	SnorlaxCpap asks, How far into the future do you predict we see Elon finally break down and start a Cybertruck car chase, much like OJ back in the 90s?
	Like a week.
	Oh god, we could only dream of such a thing happening.
	I know, I wish it would.
	Imagine Elon Musk actually doing a thing that was interesting.
	That would be wild.
	He does a lot of shit that sucks and is worth talking about because it just allows us the opportunity to dunk on him some more.
	But imagine if he actually came out and did something that was actually interesting.
	I don't know, leading a bunch of people on a low-speed, like, fucking car chase.
	After murdering someone.
	Allegedly.
	Yeah, Elon does crimes, and our legal system doesn't know how to handle a multi-trillionaire criminal.
	So they're just, like, slowly chasing after his Cybertruck, and he's just driving along at, like, he has the AI- 35 miles an hour?
	Yeah, he has the AI driving at, like, 35 miles an hour for him.
	And, oh man, and then it, uh, the AI doesn't notice like the, like, like, I don't know, small animal that darts across the street and it runs into the Cybertruck and Elon is just absolutely pulverized inside the Cybertruck.
	And that is the end.
	That is the end of our Muskian Overlord in the most bizarre- That's how we want to go.
	Yes.
	Mr. Musk, pull over.
	We have your child on the line.
	What's your name?
	They said their name is that sound a dial-up modem makes.
	Oh, okay, that is his kid.
	That does sound like one of his kids.
	No, I, I, I, I laugh both because I know that noise.
	And also because there is this, uh, poker vlogger who does like shorts or
	reels or whatever you call them on YouTube.
	And whenever any of his opponents are thinking about a decision, he puts the wheelbar, the loading wheel on them and plays that noise.
	He's just like...
	Oh, God.
	Oh, poor dial-up modem.
	Never able to earn Elon's love.
	They tried so hard.
	But, yeah.
	Well, you know.
	It's hard to earn Elon's love if you're not like a robot woman or probably a cartoon woman or some sycophantic bootleg on Twitter with a blue check.
	Like a doge guy.
	Yeah.
	Straight to the moon, am I right daddy Elon?
	Tongue emoji.
	Elon's just a guest.
	I will bless you with a retweet.
	Oh god.
	I'll steal your meme.
	Yeah.
	Or your Stephen King, who Elon obviously has a crush on and just wishes that Senpai would love him, but that will never happen.
	I just love... Elon's just like the guy who's hanging out with the woman who absolutely fucking hates him, but because it's Elon's bar and she just has to tolerate him, and she in this case is Stephen King, and so it's gonna be the funniest thing in the world to be Stephen King.
	You're like, You're a pasture prime writer.
	You have your pile of money.
	And the richest man in the world is just like, Hey, Stephen King, please say that I'm cool.
	And you're just like, fuck off, Elon, you dumb weirdo.
	And he's like, Oh, you talked to me.
	Oh, I'm so honored.
	And it's like, Oh my God, really?
	And Elon's like, Oh, well, time to go put another child into Grimes.
	And Grimes is like, I'm cool with that because I am also the worst.
	Yes!
	I thought it was three at this point.
	You still like the music, but she sucks.
	She had enough sex with you, unless they produced two human being children.
	Allegedly.
	I thought it was three at this point.
	I'm not even sure.
	Is it three?
	Oh my god.
	God.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	It turns out nothing is as much of an aphrodisiac as $250 billion.
	Yeah, pretty much.
	I saw this guy with hair plugs at a party and he looked like a real dorkus, but then he started telling me about all of his anime collection and I thought that he really sucked, but then he also told me it was like $250 billion.
	And I'm Grimes and now I have three of his children!
	Yeah, good stuff.
	Okay.
	I'm sure he just wooed you off of your feet with all of his fucking big brain ideas about philosophy 101.
	He's so cool.
	What if the world we're living in, like, isn't?
	Doesn't exist.
	How many billions?
	Oh my god, the world!
	The scales are falling through my eyes!
	He's like, babe, what if we live in the Matrix?
	Like, for the 20th time he's talking about that.
	Alright, Pop Music Cessation Grimes thinks we should continue this in the bedroom.
	Because the alternative to that theory that she was gold digging his 250 billion dollars is that she was so charmed by Elon Musk that she decided to have sex with him enough times to fucking have multiple children by him.
	That is way worse.
	That is so much worse.
	I would fuck Elon Musk for $250 billion.
	I would fuck Elon Musk for $250,000.
	Like, you don't have to explain that math to me, but if I'm at a party, Elon Musk is not charming me.
	It's not gonna happen.
	It's impossible.
	That guy is, like, poison for charisma.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, just being around him makes you less cool.
	Impossible.
	What would anyone say to him at a party where he would actually be able to break the ice with some witty bon mot that would have everybody chuckling?
	You know who's worth 250 billion dollars?
	I am!
	Now laugh!
	Yes, and then he just starts doling it out.
	They're all chuckling.
	He just throws money at them.
	I'd be right there, dude.
	I'd be like a fucking seal.
	So funny!
	If he's throwing bricks at me, yeah dude, throw those bands at me dawg!
	I love it!
	What I'm imagining right now is just being at a party and you just see Elon with this circle of sycophants just following him.
	And then Elon just yells out, and then I said, there are only two genders!
	And they all start laughing hysterically.
	And you're like, nervously looking at each other as like the money just hits him in the face and chest.
	Yeah, that was great, Elon!
	Just like a wad of 100, just slap him in the face.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	So yeah, please get in the Cybertruck.
	Please do something horrifying that results in a slow speed chase.
	Make yourself- Oh yeah, what was the question?
	I remembered the question, but God, we went pretty wildly off-topic there.
	Yes.
	So, and finally, MeBad asks, looking bad at all the fuss over incandescent light phase-out, are there any good conspiracy theories involving LED lights or other alternatives?
	The fuck is incandescent light phase-out?
	Oh, to make note, we basically got rid of all the old light bulbs because LED lights are way more energy efficient and they last.
	What's the conspiracy theory surrounding that?
	Oh, basically, like, there was this giant... They're gay.
	Well, obviously, but no.
	These lights are so gay.
	You wouldn't believe how gay these lights are.
	I walked into this hospital and I was like, these lights are so gay.
	So the what happened was is that people like Republicans were actually pissing and moaning about the air incandescent lights being phased out for LED lights because they wanted choice.
	We want to be able to choose lights we want.
	And it was like, no, this is like beyond the just being like a thing that like companies were moving towards.
	This is market forces.
	This is, this would be like saying, I don't want to have my movies downloaded to my computer.
	I want them on VHS.
	It's like, sorry, market forces like won out.
	Like, like old tiny VCRs.
	They don't exist anymore.
	Cause no one will do that shit.
	There was no conspiracy here.
	It was just better technology supplanted other technology.
	That's where you're wrong.
	Because as far as I know, there was a conspiracy.
	It just happened like a hundred years ago between the lightbulb manufacturing company.
	This is true.
	Very quickly after manufacturing the lightbulb, there was an arms race to develop longer lasting ones and it got to the point where they were just like, we could make these motherfuckers Willy Wonka style last effectively forever, but we can't make any money selling everybody one lightbulb.
	That's not capitalism.
	So, they all got together and were just like, hey guys, we all have to be cool and make sure that we're planned obsolescence our lightbulbs at the same rate so that way we can keep raking that shit in.
	So you know what there, conspiracy theorists about the lightbulb?
	You're fucking half right like always.
	You got hoodwinked hundred plus years ago.
	I was gonna say hundred, but it's not quite that long.
	Hundred plus.
	You got hoodwinked.
	By big lightbulb.
	You've lived your whole life being hoodwinked by them.
	Go fuck yourself.
	You're so real for that one, Al.
	That was real.
	That was real.
	That was good.
	It's like how big Pulp Fiction is to me.
	It's like how Big Globe tricked us all into believing in the round earth.
	It's like they just sell you globes and they put them in your schools and then you're brainwashed.
	You stray from God's light because that's a lot of what flat earth is.
	It's biblical flat earth.
	And now they're telling me that we're replacing the big sun with a sub-soda green LED sun.
	I don't know about this new sun.
	Sounds pretty gay.
	Mike was being intelligent for a second.
	I think that Trump like literally is just so aggressively on autopilot that if left to his own devices, he'll just piss and moan about water pressure in various things.
	Like these dishwashers, you got to wash the dishes like six times now and you take a shower and it barely hits you.
	I don't understand it.
	It's like, oh my God.
	How is this guy, how was he our president?
	How is it possible he'll be our president again when literally the whole world confuses him?
	Like every day he's like a small child that's just, instead of being full of wonder and like just mystery about the world, he's just like mad because he like took a crap and then he had to flush twice because he ate so much from McDonald's the previous night that like it was a really big one.
	And he's like, ugh, these modern toilets, they don't flush good.
	Fucking Deep State making my poops, like, flow up.
	They gotta get someone in here to plunger them, but I don't, argh.
	Can you imagine being the secret service agent that's closest to the door when Donald Trump is doing his bathroom shit?
	That's gonna suck.
	Yes.
	It's gonna be a pretty rough detail.
	Just listen to him be like, because you know he's on Twitter just pissing and moaning or on Truth or whatever, just like, ranting and raving.
	Oh God, total loser.
	So back to the lightbulbs, I'm just saying, do you remember when Laura Ingraham drank lightbulbs?
	Nope.
	Through meat on Fox News?
	You don't remember that?
	This was part of the fucking lightbulb shit.
	This is all I thought of when you mentioned this.
	Was she trying to cure her COVID?
	She was like, look at this triggered libs and she like takes a straw and is like sticks it in a piece of like, like steak that has a bunch of light bulbs sticking out of it.
	And she's like, this will trigger the, you never saw this Mike.
	This is part of the, the iridescent light.
	What is she trying to trigger in me?
	An erection?
	I don't know.
	Confusion?
	Maybe it's less sensual than it sounded in your description.
	It was.
	It was mostly confusing.
	You were like, she's got a big meat, she's got a straw, there's some sucking, and I was just like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
	There's light bulbs in the meat, you know?
	Yeah, that part was confusing, but sometimes it can be like that.
	It is confusing when you see it.
	It is.
	It is.
	I mean, these doofuses are always saying and doing shit that confuse and shock the mind.
	Mm-hmm.
	I'm assuming that Mike was doing research on it because he was deep in the phone.
	No, I just need to find a photo of this lightbulb steak.
	I'm very confused.
	Oh, wow.
	That is... What the fuck?
	It's kind of hard to see.
	But yeah, you see it?
	I do.
	I mean, I'm not exactly sure what's going on there, but... So anyhow, last question.
	We've already kind of got Hayley's answer, which is, of course, the cold embrace of death.
	But what are you looking forward to?
	Oh, beans!
	What am I looking forward to?
	I don't know, man.
	This week all went to shit once I found out that the fucking Amazon was breaking up this season of Invincible into two chunks and the first chunk's already over.
	It's very disappointing.
	So, I don't know.
	Christmas times, I guess?
	I'm still buying gifts for people because I like doing that if I see a sweet gift for somebody.
	My answer to this week is very boring.
	I'm sorry.
	I got nothing, guys.
	There's no joy left in my heart.
	That's fair.
	That's fair.
	Hayley, do you have anything else to offer for this week besides your previous answer?
	No.
	Nah, she's a me on Team Joyless Heart.
	We're Team Joyless Heart in crop tops and sweats.
	Maybe next week I'll have something, but this week the sweet embrace sounds nice.
	This week it's all you, Mike.
	You're the one who needs to bring it.
	Well, unfortunately, I don't have awesome stuff because the re-update of that website that just keeps claiming they're going to do something involving Q, Oh, yeah.
	re-uploaded, re-updated their countdown so that's now eight days away. So next week's pod will be
	getting close to the revelation, but sadly not. It'll just re-update to another month after that.
	How long is it gonna fucking gonna take for them to get their merch printed or whatever? I mean,
	Jesus. Like, you know. They put John McAfee on it right now.
	Yeah. Yeah. I'm just looking forward to the fact that I just checked my phone
	and the Patriots are beating the Steelers seven to three, which boo, lose.
	Patriots lose!
	We need that draft pick.
	But I'm actually rooting for the fact that I would love to see them actually score some points in this game, because everyone in America was like, oh, it's free money!
	Bet the under!
	These teams can't score anything!
	Woo!
	So it'd be super funny if this game ended up being like a crazy high-scoring shootout between two stumble bums.
	And then afterwards, everyone's like, oh shit, the NFL's rigged!
	And it's like, no.
	It's a sporting event.
	It's random.
	Fucking random stuff happens all the time.
	There's nothing I enjoy more than people telling me that the blackjack game they're playing is rigged or the roulette table they're playing at is rigged.
	It's like, the game was rigged by the odds.
	We don't control the wheel or the cards or any of that.
	The rig was baked in before you even sat down.
	It's rigged.
	Shut up.
	It's rigged.
	You rigged it.
	You rigged it specifically against him.
	Yes.
	It's like me.
	My love life is rigged.
	You rigged it.
	It's rigged.
	Rigged.
	Rigged.
	Everything I don't like about life is rigged.
	I'm poor.
	It's rigged.
	Everything's rigged.
	You're damn right.
	Dude, just go through life blaming everybody else for everything.
	That's the way to be.
	Yes.
	Anyway, so that'll do it.
	On that positive, affirming note, it's time to leave Hellworld for the week.
	Let's toboggan this week.
	I don't think we've done a toboggan before.
	We're going to toboggan right the fuck out of Hellworld so fast.
	Dude, recklessly fast down the mean asphalt slopes that surround Hellworld.
	Thank you so much for listening and supporting the show.
	If you want to support the show even harder, but still for free, you can do so by giving us a 5-star review wherever you get your podcasts from.
	If you have money and you want to give it to us, we will take it.
	You can go to patreon.com slash PokerPolitics to give us your money.
	If you give us $5 or more per month, you get access to all of our bonus content, which we have several hours of, going over a bunch of Q related pop media stuff, and a bunch of other bonus stuff that Mike has put into the can with various rotating guest hosts, so check it out there if you'd like to.
	Once again, patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
	Thank you so much for all of our beautifuller babies in the crib supporting us with that Do Re Mi.
	We do appreciate it.
	If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, you can do some good with it by donating it to love146.org, their organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
	Thanks always for the use of our opening song.
	Remix of It Was by Mr. Mike Rains goes to DJ Minimal Effort.
	Uh, and as always, thanks for all of our bumps before we replace him with George Santos, uh, to our buddy Frosty.
	DigimomaEverettNoSocials.
	Uh, you can find Frosty on, uh, Twitter, at FrostyBO.
	Speaking of social media, you can kind of find me on BlueSky, uh, at MysteriousL.
	You can defo find Haley at various places, but also specifically Blue Sky, where we, uh, you know, have staked our claim at Arizona Right Watch.
	And Mike Rains is of course, at Poker Politics on pretty much every social platform that is fit to be on, including Rumble, where he can let his Nazi freak flag fly.
	What a legend.
	Uh, barely a response from him on that one.
	He was so, so deep into his phone.
	I thought I was going to get him with that one, but no, he was too busy checking whatever Nazi shit he loves to check, uh, because he's a Nazi.
	So, for another successful episode of the Adventures in Hellware Podcast, I've been one of your hosts, Mysterious Al.
	Joined as always by Haley, aka Arizona Right Watch, and our expert in all things QAnon, Crazy, Mr. Mike Rains.

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