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Nov. 2, 2023 - Adventures in HellwQrld

01:40:58

Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #163: MKULTRA and QAnon gets creative.

This week we talk about the death of Matthew Perry and how it led QAnon to some decodes and we talk about the shooting in Maine and what exactly MKULTRA is and isn't. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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	I'm going to go ahead and get started.
	Content warning.
	The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
	Listener discretion advised.
	Hello, everybody.
	I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
	Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
	This week, I am joined, as always, by Haley, a.k.a.
	Arizona Right Watch.
	Hello, everybody.
	What's up?
	What's down?
	You know, all right.
	And the mysterious Elle.
	Ho ho!
	Merry Christmas, my beautiful babies!
	It's November 1st, and we all know that means it's Christmas!
	And I'm actually genuinely here for it.
	I love when this happens.
	Yep.
	The moment we shove Halloween out the door, bam, it's Christmastime.
	It's all over.
	It's actually Day of the Dead.
	I'm sorry.
	I'm gonna go ahead and claim Halloween.
	Spooky season for two more days.
	Two more days.
	I mean, hey, you can celebrate whenever you'd like to, but in terms of the horrible consumer machine that we live inside of, like those aliens desperately hoping that the claw chooses them, it's Christmas inside the claw machine.
	Yeah.
	Mariah Carey even thought herself out on her own Twitter page, which genuinely got a little bit of a chuckle out of me.
	I do love that the people responsible for her marketing or whatever are just leaning into it.
	It's just like literally like 12.01am November 1st, she's posting a thing.
	It's like... It's time, motherfuckers!
	You know who I am.
	You know who I am.
	That's where she gets all her money now, probably, right?
	Is, like, the Christmas stuff.
	She doesn't put out new shit, does she?
	How long can Butterfly, you know, bring in residuals?
	It's the Christmas that brings in the money.
	It's like Christian music, kinda.
	Yeah, I mean, I don't know how... Oh, she's fine.
	I don't know what her output is like, but I do know that she's been famously crazy and attractive for a long time, and that's just sort of a career in itself.
	Once those people hit a trajectory, I just assume they're rich and famous forever, and I'm not sure why.
	Britney Spears is that way.
	Before she had her residency in Vegas, I had no fucking idea what Britney Spears was up to.
	I was just like, what is she doing?
	But I was just like, well, she's still famous.
	She's still Britney Spears.
	I mean, I know who she is.
	She just put out a book.
	Oh, she sure did.
	Justin Timberlake's in big trouble.
	Imagine cheating on your girlfriend 25 years ago, and then all of a sudden, now everyone in society is shaming you for it.
	I think it's more the forced abortion that people are shaming him for.
	God, I wish.
	I've been seeing a lot of people shaming him specifically for the breakup part.
	Anyways, Mike, are you knee-deep in old 90s relationship pop culture?
	Not really, no.
	I'm very weak on the Brittany Timberlake drama.
	The one thing I do know is that Liz Crokan desperately tried to get herself in on the Free Brittany movement.
	It was really funny.
	She and these right-wing grifting shitbags.
	I'm getting more furious with you by the second as you bring relevant to our genre stuff into the bush.
	I'm so sorry.
	I'll tolerate the reference to Liz Crokan, but then as soon as you start going on your rant about these people.
	I'm not telling him to stop, I'm just saying that this is not what The Boosh is for!
	I love knowing what QAnon thinks of celebrities.
	This isn't even The Boosh, this is The Preboosh, yes.
	We're just talking.
	But no, the thing that was so funny is she basically tried to make this terrible movie, because this was like right after Out of Shadows made her like quote-unquote viral on the right wing.
	So she made this terrible Britney movie called Slave Princess about how Britney was in her conservatorship and all that horrible shit and how like Britney was being like... We should work that title.
	Yeah, well, she was trying to, like, she was trying to make something happen with it.
	But the problem was, is she released the movie right when the conservatorship ended.
	Like, literally, Brittany won her lawsuit right when the movie came out.
	So all of its relevancy just immediately evaporated.
	And so Liz was left with this giant, giant, absolute stink bomb of a quote-unquote documentary that no one cared about.
	And it was so long.
	Oh, maybe.
	Oh, I watched it.
	It was because a bunch of Free Britney people came to me about her.
	So I was in these DM groups with Free Britney people talking about Liz Croak, and it was great.
	It was just like this fucking bizarre, dark world.
	But the best part about all of that was that Liz used the Slave Princess Twitter account to attack me.
	She actually got into a fight with me on Twitter.
	But she didn't want to use her real name.
	She didn't want to use her real account.
	So she just used the Slave Princess name to get into a fight It was, it was hilarious.
	That name is so awkward.
	I know.
	I got in a fight with the Liz Krogan slave.
	It triggers like a billion guilts into me because like there's something about it that is appealing in a way that makes me question my own like morals a lot.
	I'm just like, I shouldn't, I think it's just because like, you know, quote unquote, slave Leia, who is a princess, has poisoned my brain for that specific, because it, like pretty much any other situation, the word slave is like, Persona non grata.
	I don't want nothing to do with that.
	That makes me feel bad and guilty exclusively.
	That sucks.
	Hate that.
	Like, you know, but, but then you put a little Princess Leia involved.
	You're just like, well, wait a minute.
	You know, that bikini's pretty nice.
	Sometimes it's, sometimes it's truly horrible to be a man and more people should talk about the male stroke.
	You know, it's real tough for us.
	Absolutely not.
	Did either of you do anything fun for Halloween?
	I did not.
	I came home and went to bed.
	I had mentioned last week on the pod that they were letting us wear costumes at work instead of our uniforms at work, so I put in the most low-effort costume imaginable, and basically my goal— Oh, I might have you beat.
	We'll see, though.
	I had a cookout to go to a couple of days ago, and mine was pretty lazy.
	No.
	So basically what I did was I just found an incredibly old uniform that we used to wear at my work, which was just a shirt.
	Because now I have to wear a suit now.
	I have to be all professional.
	So I just put on my old-timey shirt and just went to work as old-timey dealer from the place I am employed by.
	And so many of the old-school employees who saw me were like, boom, you're killing it, bro!
	Way to go!
	That's a funny outfit.
	We love that!
	Yes!
	And then 90% of people were like, what the fuck is your outfit?
	And I'm like, yeah, that's what we were going for.
	I was going for 10% hit, 90% confusion, and I nailed it.
	Okay, so I think this might be the tiebreaker.
	Did you have to button that shirt?
	No, I did not.
	Ooh, that is gonna make it tough, because my costume was...
	Some friends of mine went to Batboy the Musical, and in doing so, they picked up these souvenir Batboy ears that clip onto your regular ears.
	So, they told me that we were going to this cookout.
	They were like, it's a cookout, Chili Cookoff for Halloween, it's great.
	Essentially, I'm in their car, they're just like, Chili Cookout costume contest, it's gonna be great, everyone in costume.
	And I was just like, I don't have a fucking costume, so I put on the Batboy ears.
	And because I'm, like, just like a bald, fat goober who dresses just sort of like a regular guy, you know, I have big, like, district manager energy sometimes.
	Like, anybody who asked me, I just told them I was just like, I'm just a chill, laid-back 21st century Nosferatu, you know?
	And then I would just talk at them like that until they stopped questioning me any further.
	So, my costume is literally just me with some clip-on Batboy ears.
	Alright.
	I think you win.
	I posted it to my old school social media, which is to say I posted it on Facebook, where only people who know me personally know a thing.
	Mike says deep cut.
	It's a reference.
	It's got lore.
	It's funny to people who get it.
	It reminds them of when they were young.
	Yours is just like, I put on some ears.
	So I think yours is, you win for the most slow effort.
	Nice.
	I hate putting in effort, and I love winning.
	It really works out.
	This is my morning outfit for the weekend that I went out.
	If you can see it, it's all cow.
	Yeah, you are a cow lady.
	I can sort of see it, but it is incredibly grainy.
	I wanted to let you go last because I figured if anybody was going to have put in effort to Halloween, it was going to be you.
	You could shame us.
	Yes.
	It's a morning outfit.
	Does that mean you have a costume change?
	Yeah, I did this like free market, you know, just like a mutual aid free market in the morning on Saturday for Halloween stuff.
	I dressed as Bitch I'm a Cow, you know, Doja Cat.
	I would be shocked if Mike knew, but of course I know!
	I have a cowboy hat that's it's cow print and then this cow print top and then I have a cow print jacket that has frillies.
	It's very cowboy.
	I truly love that no matter how many times we do this, Hayley refuses to acknowledge that podcasting is the theater of the mind.
	And she just has to show me else.
	She described exactly what she was wearing, top to bottom.
	But she always shows us photos and then I just feel ashamed because now our audience is just listening to us react to photos.
	You have to subscribe to the million dollar tier to get photos.
	We started OnlyFans where you just post random pictures.
	It's not sexual at all.
	It's not even the question of lewds or dudes.
	It's like, no, this is just me.
	It's just me.
	It's just me going to Starbucks.
	The problem with that is that the people who are willing to pay into the OnlyFans system, I'm pretty sure are going to make it sexual no matter what.
	It's just me.
	You could be like posting a picture of you under like a white sheet like you were like a classic style ghost and they'd just be like, oh dude look at that hot ghost!
	So cut to night of Saturday was just when I did most of my event stuff.
	I did like an art thing.
	So were you doing this stuff for like for pleasure or for oh yeah that's the stuff now we're talking.
	Were you, uh, were you doing this for, for like business or pleasure or both?
	Like, were you working an event or was this just you chilling?
	Um, we, we, I just do things because I want to do things.
	Yeah, fair enough.
	That's the way, that's the way to be.
	Sometimes I sell art.
	Sometimes I'm like, I ain't doing that.
	Sometimes I participate.
	I heard you do zines, so I didn't know if you were handing out zines.
	Um, yes.
	Nice.
	Excellent.
	I mean, I don't know why your show is named after zines.
	These are cool.
	I like zines.
	And it also gives me the excuse to reveal that I retain knowledge about you, so be careful what you say, dammit.
	Okay, I'll stop talking.
	Oh, I like your ears.
	Oh yeah, I sent you my picture of my children.
	It is definitely more low effort than Mike.
	Mark.
	Right?
	I mean, Mark!
	I'm so sorry!
	Old Mark Stones!
	The host of our podcast!
	Mark Hale of the Adventures in Heaven World Podcast!
	Yes!
	Excellent, yeah.
	Did anyone do anything yesterday for actual Halloween?
	I told you about my actual fever dream.
	Oh, yeah.
	Did anyone hand out candy to children?
	No, I was work-a-lurking.
	I didn't get out of work until very late, so I would not have been able to hand out candy to children.
	It's a weird day, Tuesday.
	Yeah, it's an awkward day.
	The one thing that happened that was kind of wild was we had a bunch of people, a few customers had very low rent costumes, and then this one guy was playing blackjack and had just an insane Deadpool costume.
	Just like absolutely bought body suit like just layered on he had he obviously couldn't wear it in the casino but he on the chair next to him he had a Deadpool mask resting on the chair and the mask was absolutely like he paid he paid a buck for that mask that mask cost some money and I was just like Jesus Christ like man there's a chance he made all that stuff himself cosplayers be out there they'd be very talented Yeah, I mean, I was just like, man, if you were, like, looking to try to, I don't know, show off your craft, like, sitting in a casino on a Tuesday night in your full-on Deadpool ensemble was just like, man, you're missing the boat, buddy.
	You're missing the boat.
	You could go anywhere else and pop off with that shit.
	He's living his best life.
	Oh yeah, no.
	Spoiler alert, he absolutely fucking wasn't, let me tell you.
	Mike is here to tell you that that guy is in a living hell of his own design.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Oh man.
	But on that note, let's transition to our light and breezy booth segment that I kind of already thought we were in because I'm out of my mind!
	It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
	Get ready for the amuse-bouche.
	Matthew Perry's dead.
	Light and fluffy.
	Yes, the fluffiest, the lightest.
	I think this is a bummer for a lot of people.
	I don't think I've ever seen anything but one thing that Matthew Perry is in.
	We're going to talk about it in its lightest and fluffiest context, I'm sure, like the fake conspiracy theories surrounding the circumstances of it.
	Nobody's happy that Matthew Perry is dead.
	It was the weird contrast, though, on the internet of people who were devastated because it's like friends culture.
	Yeah.
	And then people who are like, it's okay that we can speculate wildly about this man's death, right?
	I mean, I'm happy to engage with the weirdness of that, because I grew up, you know, I'm the age to have grown up with friends, you know what I mean?
	Like, there are two generations that can claim that shit as being, like, they were in the trenches, and I'm one of those two generations.
	I don't give a fuck about friends.
	Never have, never will.
	So, when Matthew Perry passed, and everybody, like, started, like, saying how sad and devastated they were over it, I was just like, Where the fuck were all you people when Matthew Perry was trying to have a post-Friends career?
	And the general population just sort of dropped off the face of the fucking planet for most of it.
	Like, if you guys love Matthew Perry so much, why didn't you support him when he needed you?
	Yeah, I mean, from everything I was reading about, like, the actual state of affairs with him, it seemed like the guy had been pretty much, like, fighting addictions for most of his adult life, and that, like, this was, like, these were the problems that, like, led to what happened.
	Unlike what our dum-dum friends would like to say, which was, Matthew Perry wore a shirt that said, I'm totally vaccinated!
	Wonder what happened to him!
	And it's just, oh, God.
	It's okay to speculate about this, because he wore the shirt Right, exactly.
	I kept seeing people say that, like, it's okay to do- like, they have to justify why they're being ghouls immediately.
	I also love how, like, if you ask one of those people, you're just like, okay, so, you think that the vaccine killed this guy, what should we do about that?
	And then they'll just be like, pfft.
	Gotta get rid of vaccines, obviously.
	And you're just like, okay, out of all the millions of people that have the vaccine, this one guy died.
	We're getting rid of all the vaccines.
	Would you like to have an honest discussion about how many people are killed by firearms?
	No?
	Okay.
	I didn't think so.
	So fuck you.
	Vaccines forever.
	Vaccines forever.
	All deaths in America from here on out are caused by the vaccine in some way or the other.
	We just have to live in that reality.
	I thought you were going for the joke about how the people were claiming COVID deaths were being miscounted in order to make them seem worse.
	Like, this guy got shot and they called it a COVID death!
	I'm sorry, I thought that's what you were going for.
	You know, it has layers.
	The fact that I got I managed to get the setup to a part where it was like a choose your own adventure style Republicans or hypocrites across the board adventure like joke, like you go ahead and take that big of that what you will.
	It's just like the setup is Here, and then choose whichever layer of Republican hypocrisy you'd like.
	If you want to view hypocrisy, simply look around and view it.
	Any hypocrisy you want to, choose it.
	Yeah, there's lots of ghoulishness.
	It's a choose-your-own-adventure, but you can just literally go to any other page in the book.
	It doesn't even direct you.
	It's like if you'd like to see Republican hypocrisy, find any other page in the book, and it's there.
	It's just waiting for you.
	It's not a problem.
	So what up with Matthew Perry?
	Anything besides the Vax?
	Did anyone say anything specific?
	Okay, so do the Clintons get involved?
	We're there.
	Don't worry, we're there.
	I dialed in.
	I could hear and I could visualize the sand on my toes in the salt air of the Epstein Island.
	Was he about to crack it all open?
	Oh, if only Matthew Perry was literally about to release a child trafficking documentary.
	Oh, if only.
	But no, actually what happened was because After these people scream about vaccine deaths, the next thing they do is they rush to the Qdrops and they try to find a connection from the prophecies of Q to our world now.
	What they found was the photo of Rachel Chandler with Bill Clinton on a plane that they think was Jeffrey Epstein's, but it wasn't.
	I forget the name of the billionaire whose plane it actually was, but it's not Epstein.
	And this Q-drop reads, Epstein's plane.
	Who is she?
	That's Rachel Chandler.
	Follow friends.
	Friends lead to others.
	Open source Q. So people were like, Matthew Perry died.
	Follow friends.
	So people are like going into the show Friends and trying to figure out who else was on the show, who were the guest stars.
	That Matthew Perry is a cog in the Epstein trafficking wheel that also implicates the Clintons.
	And now they can go after everybody that was based off that show.
	So Jennifer Anderson, you're next.
	You're in the crosshairs of QAnon.
	They're going to find your crimes.
	Honestly, this is not a joke.
	In terms of the content that we produce, the things you just said might be my favorite content that we have covered in like a year.
	Because it was like, a thing happened that had absolutely nothing, clearly nothing to do with anything.
	A celebrity just passed away under circumstances that likely involved a healthcare related issue due to years of substance abuse.
	And then we managed to get that to QAnon has a theory.
	Then we managed to get to a fucking QDROP that has enough of a point that I'm just like, dude, I can see why stupid people would buy this.
	That actually has a narrative to it.
	That QDROP actually kind of says a thing.
	I'm not saying it's right.
	It's obviously madness.
	But like, I love that shit.
	I love it.
	It's just like, You can look at that Q drop and just be like, oh my god, he's actually trying to communicate a thing.
	He's literally just like, yo, these people on Epstein's Plane, look at friends.
	Friends is the key!
	It's like, wow!
	I miss that.
	I miss that about Q drop.
	Back when QAnon were people deciphering the text of their god king, it was so fun.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, so I haven't seen them doing much more baking on the Friends side of things because they've got so much on their plate from all the war in Israel and Palestine and all that stuff going on that the Matthew Perry stuff kind of came and went.
	But for a moment there, they were chewing on that bone.
	They were trying to find something.
	They were working on it.
	So we'll see.
	I mean, this is the sort of thing that everything that ever happens in our world doesn't actually go away.
	It just gets put back on the pile, and then they revisit it a couple years later.
	So this is something that we're going to hear about it again.
	He's part of me now.
	And on that note, I'm going to segue to our next Boost topic, because the next Boost topic features QAnon favorite Hillary Clinton.
	Is she dead?
	Yes, so... Home Improvement noise?
	For those of you who don't know, Elle is now actually grunting like Tim Allen does, and they can only see the top half of my face because I'm like the neighbor from the show.
	I'm obscured on our webcam.
	It's incredibly awkward and confusing, and I have to hold that little fence prop over half my face at all times.
	It's really weird.
	Who's Hayley, though?
	We have a third co-host, Mike.
	Who's Hayley and who I'm approving?
	I never saw it, so I'm just the humble watcher.
	Is Hayley our sensible Al Borland?
	Or the assistant to Hal?
	Because they have the female assistant on Tool Time, and they also had Tim's wife in quote-unquote real life.
	Yeah, but Hayley has features independent of her being a woman.
	This is true.
	This is true.
	Is it true?
	Am I a person?
	I grant you personhood.
	Okay, for the record, what just went down, because you've never seen the show, is that I gave you the best role in the show.
	Al Borland, the most sensible guy.
	He's the best.
	Everybody loves him.
	Mike was trying to give you his lady assistant.
	He's like, woman?
	Timmy Flynn's lady wife.
	What is this?
	Oh my gosh.
	I'm dead!
	It's over!
	TKO in the first round!
	Okay, back on track.
	I'm gonna fucking brute force it.
	Hillary Clinton.
	Why do we think Hillary Clinton is dead?
	Okay, so basically in 2016, if you remember this, when Hillary was in New York campaigning for president and she was visiting the 9-11 memorial, Hillary fainted.
	Yeah, dude, that was like her Jordan Flu game.
	put into her sedan by the Secret Service, whisked away to wherever she received medical
	treatment, and then she was back on her feet a little while later.
	And the official story that is obviously bullshit was that she had pneumonia and that she was
	overexerting herself, and that's why she passed out when that happened.
	Yeah, dude, that was like her Jordan flu game.
	Yes.
	So this was, of course, just the thing that happened and no one cared about it or remembered
	But now, QAnon is re-investigating Hillary's fainting spell in this event.
	And at this point, they are questioning if that was when Hillary was arrested by the White Hats for her innumerous crimes, or if this was some sort of incident where She was she perished and then was replaced by a clone.
	And generally speaking right now, these commentaries would indicate that the clone is somehow controlled by the White House.
	Basically, Hillary Puppet ran the rest of the campaign against Trump before she was defeated.
	And so.
	I've seen a lot of people revisiting this, and one guy posted a video and was like, Killary Clinton!
	Is she dead?
	Is she alive?
	And Brian Cates, the guy who's writing for the Epoch Times... Can I just put a pause in there for a second?
	Opposition, stop giving your opponents cool names.
	Killary Clinton.
	These are cool names.
	You cannot give your opposition a cool name.
	Like, that is part of the secret spice.
	Like, if you watch wrestling, which you do, it's...
	You watch wrestling.
	So when you watch wrestling, there's a phenomenon where the bad guys get popular and they get way more popular than the good guys.
	And you're just like, I'm rooting for the bad guy.
	Uh, yeah.
	But like, you don't want to do that to your opposition.
	So stop making that sound cool.
	Yeah.
	Oh, man.
	You're face-turning Joe Biden and Hillary Clinton.
	Don't do that.
	It's suboptimal for your goals.
	But they've done this thing now where they're working out this situation where Hillary got arrested earlier.
	And I've seen one guy go down this rabbit hole where he was like, so who ordered her to be arrested?
	Because even in his tiny pea brain, he figured out that Obama was president when this happened.
	And it's like, was Obama under the control of the White Hats?
	And was he forced to arrest Hillary?
	How deep does it go down the rabbit hole?
	What's really interesting about this is that we're almost creating a sort of reverse QAnon, where the first stage of these sort of campfire stories is religion, where you're like, okay, well, there's a god, and he's a good guy, and he likes everyone, and he's making sure that good stuff happens.
	The good guys are running everything because the all-powerful guy that runs everything is good.
	And then conspiracy theories were like part two where they were like actually bad people run everything and they're evil and they're bad.
	And now this guy is going to like the third layer which is people run the world but they're good.
	And it's like that's not really a conspiracy theory.
	You're literally just saying that like the armies of Jesus are doing the good thing.
	You're just going back to religion.
	You're just it's like We don't need QAnon.
	We have the Bible.
	We don't need this shit.
	You're adding a bunch of extra steps that are unnecessary and meaningless.
	Like, stop.
	The Illuminati shit is what sells.
	We need to know why John Legend and Chrissy Teigen are, like, pedivores.
	We don't need to know why they're secretly controlled by the good guys.
	Well, there's always a category of people out there that want new characters introduced to their stuff.
	Just look at Catholicism.
	Like, if they stopped at the Bible, Catholicism wouldn't be a thing.
	They have, like, a gajillion characters.
	Yeah, you just have to keep making saints and prophets and you just gotta keep the story going.
	And that's- Catholicism is like the shonen of the gods of Abraham.
	Because it's got, like, all these characters where it's just, like, regular person who's, like, got the shine that has to prove themselves through three tremendous deeds to be candidized and just be like, okay, guess what?
	From now on, principal cast member, baby, you're there.
	You might not get a lot of screen time, but you're there, baby.
	You're Yamcha.
	Enjoy being Yamcha.
	You're Chiaotzu, baby!
	You are Chiaotzu!
	It's like, oh!
	Because, you know, being Chiaotzu, it gets you residuals.
	You don't have to be the main character to get the residgies.
	That's what matters.
	You gotta get to 100 episodes.
	That's all that matters.
	Just hit syndication.
	Boom.
	You're made.
	You're fucking made.
	And the other thing about this that makes me laugh is that this is literal heresy for QAnon because the first two Q drops are Hillary's getting arrested now!
	So you can't have Hillary get arrested a year before.
	It was an escape thing.
	They didn't get into that.
	That'll come later.
	It's like Star Wars, how it's kind of out of order.
	We'll get that info later.
	Yeah, oh yeah.
	No Redcon.
	No Redcon would happen.
	We're gonna say that Hillary Clinton's got a full body tattoo that's a map of Gitmo.
	Oh man, I can't wait until Jim Watkins like sells the QIP to somebody in mid-2024 for the
	2024 campaign and the new writer is just fucking throwing hot, hot heat.
	They're just going fucking bat shit, just throwing everything at the wall.
	Do it, Mike.
	Oh, if Jim Watkins wants to cut me the check, I will write Q drops.
	I will sell out in the most brutal way possible.
	No problem.
	Just ruin America more?
	Low six figures, I will end America.
	No harm, no foul.
	I mean, of course, once I have the QIP, I'll be like, hey, good person, give me more money and I will stop doing this.
	So I will leverage Q both ways.
	I'll play both sides.
	That's how I always win, which is a meme I see of Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
	The true Wombo Combo is at some point you wash your hands of it and then you sell your story to like book and movies and stuff.
	Right, exactly.
	Hey man, now I'm selling my life story, which is like mine.
	Like it couldn't be more mine to sell, so fuck you guys.
	And they're like, but part of your life story is like leveraging your fame to do a bunch of damage.
	You're a horrible monster.
	You're like, buddy, it's my story.
	Hey, Glenn Beck did that, like, six months of being sorry for being a right-wing nut, and then he found he couldn't make any money off of it, so he just went back to being a right-wing nut.
	I can apologize for being Q for a few months.
	The mainstream media will have my back.
	It'll be okay.
	I'll get to go on Samantha Bee's show and just, like, cry.
	It'll be great.
	It'll work out.
	Don't worry.
	For 20-25%, I'll forgive you.
	No problem.
	I'll cut you that check.
	We're on a roll talking about classic QAnon, so I have high hopes for this next boosh topic.
	I don't know what it could possibly mean, though.
	QAnon Holy Week.
	Yes.
	What the fuck does that mean?
	Sounds pretty awesome, not gonna lie.
	So, October 28th was the 6th anniversary, or as Q calls it, Delta of QDrop1.
	So we are currently living through the first week of QAnon.
	Where it was exciting, and Hillary was arrested, and we were about to arrest John Podesta and Huma Abedin.
	So what does this mean?
	The tribulation started?
	Yeah, basically.
	I actually had a guy on my timeline on Twitter Talk about how he actually engaged with me, but the thing I read from him was where he was just like, yeah, my dad just watches the CNN.
	So we don't talk anymore.
	And he's like, I'm really hoping this week is going to like, like open his eyes when everything happens.
	So this guy was really hoping that the six year Delta was going to be the big payoff that all those Q drops that were written about shit happening in that moment were actually designed to happen six years later.
	And that.
	Like, on November 3rd this year, Biden is going to be cuffed and stuffed.
	And as some people in QAnon have pointed out, this is the first time since the original QDrops that the calendar actually overlays the way it did back then.
	Like, this is the first time when October 28th was... So I know October 31st was like a Tuesday.
	So basically, this is the first time the calendar actually correctly replicates when Q was posting.
	So now they're hoping that, like, The Delta setup is right, and this Friday and Saturday will be the big payoff.
	Are the stars aligned also?
	Because that's important.
	I don't know if Mercury is in retrograde or not.
	We will have to look into that.
	We will have to inspect that, but yes.
	If it doesn't work out, I hear next time around, the stars have to be aligned correctly, so maybe they'll get it.
	Right, right.
	Maybe it'll be lucky number seven.
	Maybe it'll be lucky seven-year delta.
	I've never been more disappointed that Q is so far into the alphabet.
	It's going to take us like 10 years or whatever to get to whatever number Q is supposed to be.
	17.
	They're obsessed.
	Mike already knew.
	He's like, bam, snap, 17.
	Oh, that's good.
	Oh, trust me.
	QAnon is obsessed with the number 17 in a way that is bizarre and horrifying.
	Dan Scavino, Trump's little Q Whisperer piece of shit minion, He literally curates his Twitter feed so that he has exactly 1.7 million followers to make sure that he can give that little shout out to QAnon.
	Because I actually saw some QAnon follower being like, look at Dan Scavino's Twitter feed!
	How is it possible he has 1.7 million followers?
	It's like he bought enough followers to get to 1.7 million and then he stopped.
	That's how.
	It's not hard.
	It really isn't.
	He could have shelled out a little extra and got up to 1.788 million.
	Yes.
	Oh god, Elon's gonna so allow us to do that in the future.
	So many people are gonna have 14.88 million followers.
	Oh buddy, the shit I've been seeing is like, okay.
	Dude, 17, 14, 88, fuckin', I mean, pick a couple, like, that's too many, where are you getting too many numbers?
	Like, he has so many, and then you get to the Kamachi thing, and it's just like, dude, get out of here with all these fuckin' numbers.
	Nobody wants math.
	There's a dark place.
	Nobody wants math in their religion.
	That's so true.
	That's so true.
	I'm already pissed at like, I remember as a kid already being pissed off when they were just like, Turn to Luke, and then they would give me two numbers.
	I'd be like, they're like coordinates, like, what is this, a fucking map?
	You have to know where Luke is, and it's like, come on, man.
	Give me a page number.
	The book, just give me the fucking page number.
	Just turn to page 129 in your Bible.
	I'd be like, oh, sweet, you know?
	Like, if you're providing the Bible, you get to choose what page it's on.
	I don't know.
	That was like part of Bible study was like, you have to learn the chapters in order because you got to know how to flip to them quickly.
	It's like, man, I love wasting time.
	When there's numbers in this book, we can just do that.
	When I was going to Southern Baptist Church as a wee boy, they used to bring us, at the end, they would bring us into the altar area or whatever, but they had a big fucking treasure chest in the middle, and it would be overflowing with these cheap little toys.
	Uh, and then we knew it was Bible race time!
	So we would all fill in the pews, we'd all load up our Bibles, and then the guy who was doing the event would get up there and he would tell us to turn to whatever, and it was, it was book race!
	And if you were the first person to get there and get your hand up, he'd ask you to recite the passage, and if you were correct you got to triumphantly walk up to the treasure chest in front of literally God and everybody, and claim your prize.
	It was the sweetest part of Baptist Church for sure!
	But they were really trying to reach the youth, man.
	They had, like, puppet shows with, like, really high-grade puppets, like Muppet-grade puppets.
	And then their Easter was insane.
	Like, I remember, I think the last year I went, it must have been 1994, because one of the kids I knew found one of the plastic Easter eggs, and he got a PlayStation.
	For his Easter egg hunt.
	They were giving away, like, bikes and, like, trips to places and shit.
	Like, this place had money and wanted kids to love Baptist God.
	They were just like, we will fucking bribe you.
	Like, we will straight up... I came back from one of, like, my, like, events there with, like, four wooden dinosaur models and, like, a couple of different, like, smaller toys.
	It was just like, I was like, man, this fucking church shit's alright.
	I like this model more where they bribe you instead of asking you for your money constantly.
	Well, they bribe the children, then they make the parents tithe.
	That's how the operation works, yes.
	True, true.
	Your tithe money is just going right back to those toys.
	So shout out to any listeners who had a similar weird church bribe experience.
	I'm sure there are a lot of churches out there getting the job done by way of just making it rain gifts on people.
	But yeah, my church experience for being a little kid in an incredibly Christian church, pretty nice, actually.
	Anyway, it's time for our last Boosh topic, our recurring last Boosh topic of every week.
	We're going to touch in with our good friend Haley for this week I've called the Arizona Descent into Madness Recap because it's always popping off in Arizona and God do we love it.
	So I'll let you take it away from here.
	Haley, what's going on in Arizona this week?
	Alrighty, so you guys ever hear of a little holiday called Halloween?
	QAnon very much hates that holiday.
	I saw a lot of people posting about how, don't let your kids do Halloween.
	It is satanic and bad.
	You need to stop it.
	They actually tried to get, they got a bot army to get the hashtag end Halloween going a little.
	It was, it was really sad.
	It was really tragic.
	Yeah, that's this story's energy.
	Hashtag end Halloween.
	There was a teacher at a high school here in Arizona in Mesa, which is like a little bit outside of Phoenix.
	Who decided to get a little spooky with it and dressed up the week leading up to Halloween.
	And I say dressed up very, very, very loosely.
	I mean, he's not in a biblically accurate The Devil costume.
	I sent you both the picture because I had to show you guys just how... Oh, I did.
	Is that not what Christian Devil's supposed to look like?
	Low rent.
	It's like this guy just put on, like, the tiniest little cheap plastic horns that he got at, like, the 99 cent store.
	You can barely see them.
	And had, like, a really cheap plastic pitchfork.
	Also, dollar bin.
	And the pitchfork looked a lot like the Arizona State pitchfork.
	It didn't look like a traditional, like, devil pitchfork.
	It looked more like the Sun Devil branded version.
	Yeah, because otherwise... Maybe he's just a farmer.
	Otherwise, he was just in his regular outfit, like a polo and some slacks.
	Just a normal guy.
	Yeah, I mean, it's incredibly tame.
	There's no other word for it.
	It's the tamest thing.
	But there's a very far-right parent that goes to the school, this guy's school, who has ran for Mesa's school board before.
	And he's just constantly trying to get in the news being like the most sensational dickbag possible.
	Like, he tried to make a big deal when some of the Mesa schools were changing their name just to be more descriptive.
	If it was like, oh, this school deals in, you know, like aerospace.
	So it just was like the school's name and then had aerospace added at the end.
	Like just more descriptive of what the school is and he tried to make it like a woke in like they're changing our schools to be woke kind of thing just to get on the news.
	He's always going to school board meetings being like super loud and obnoxious just to Kind of make the news.
	And yeah, he ran for school board last year and had all the best endorsements.
	Gosar, Paul Gosar endorsed him.
	Wendy Rogers.
	This dead, he's dead now, but Russell Pierce, he's like kind of this old white supremacist lawmaker we had.
	But anyway.
	I do enjoy that this guy wasn't being subtle about his school board run.
	He wasn't trying to stealth his way into that seat.
	He's just like, no, I'm running, and if you elect me, I am going to fuck shit up.
	I am an absolute total scumbag.
	So I think he wants to run again and he's just kind of like, again, causing drama at the school that his kid attends.
	And he got a photo of the guy in the double costume and immediately sent it to Libs of TikTok.
	Um, and the teacher's gay.
	So the, so the Chris Hamlet, that's the, the, the dad who is raised on a stink.
	Um, he was like this openly homosexual teacher, uh, dressed like a demon, uh, Miss Chaya Raycheck, aka libs of TikTok.
	So she posted it, obviously.
	and was like this teacher dressed up like a demon and her like twitter account followers are like what like two million at this point um and they just like uh you know called the school there was like a bunch of petitions like with his info like the school info to like call the school to get him in trouble and turning point usa also like got a hold of it And yeah, he actually got put on administrative leave for the costume while they investigate it.
	He's like an award-winning teacher.
	He teaches like AP Calculus.
	I saw these articles on him that were like students who went on to win scholarships for math.
	Like, who wins the most scholarships for math?
	And they were, like, thanking him for being, like, a great teacher, and it's, like, this dickbag Chris Hamlet is, like, he got this guy put on administrative leave to, like, protect the kids, and it's like, well, now they know I'm a fucking teacher.
	Let me play devil's advocate for you here for just a moment and ask just an honest question.
	Is there a chance that being crushed by the weight of these Colin libs of TikTok nonsense spewers put them in a situation where they're just like, okay, put this guy on administrative leave.
	Hopefully that will placate them.
	He's not actually fired, so that once they are placated, we can quietly just reinstate him.
	I guess we'll see how it plays out, huh?
	Yeah, mostly, like, you know, one would imagine that they would make that play only because they were backed into a corner and they want to do the right thing.
	But I think more pragmatically, that would be the play they would want to do to avoid the obvious lawsuit that called those them actually terminating him over this.
	Yeah, that guy should definitely sue if he gets fired.
	Yeah, because if he gets terminated, he could just be like, oh, well, they obviously terminated me because I'm openly gay.
	And they're going to have a very hard... because if he's just like, they fired me because of the double costume, then they could probably point to some dumb policy.
	But if he's just like, they fired me because I'm gay, well, they can't point to a policy that says we fire gays, because that's illegal.
	Yeah, exactly.
	That's why you weaponize the satanic panic thing.
	It's very funny watching the news kind of, like a local news station actually did a actual like, you know, news segment, like TV segment on it.
	And they were like, it's unclear why the teacher dressed like Satan.
	And it's like, probably because it's fucking Halloween.
	And it's Halloween.
	And if it had a mascot, there's like 10 contenders and the devil's one of them.
	And a lot of them are kind of erasing the context, again, that it's Halloween.
	And they're like, teacher dresses like Satan and tells children to hail Satan in classroom.
	And it's like, he was just dressed like a devil and playing around.
	And I really don't think that we're explaining how low rent, low effort, nothing this costume was.
	No cape, no tail.
	No.
	Just like two little horns on like a band that you can barely see.
	I actually had to squint and enhance the photo to see the horns on the grainy photo.
	And then like a very obviously cheap and plastic devil pitchfork.
	That's like more elaborate in the Like trident horn areas that it needs to be.
	You know what I mean?
	Otherwise it's incredibly cheap and crappy.
	It's very terrible.
	Like this guy spent less than five bucks for all his accoutrements.
	Like he stopped into the convenience store to get coffee in the morning and they had like devil costume for $4.99 at the counter at the convenience store.
	And he was just like, Oh, it's Halloween.
	I'll get the devil costume.
	You very rarely see gas station Halloween costumes.
	I know.
	If there were one, hypothetically, it would be this one, and it would cost $4.99.
	Right.
	This is literally that guy that is on the island between two highways selling flowers to people, so just in case you need to buy flowers, you can just do that.
	This is that guy on that island divider giving away spirit Halloween junk to people who forgot to buy costumes ahead of time.
	And you're just like, oh crap, did you have a devil over there?
	He's like, yeah, $5.
	And you're like, boom, nailed it.
	Now I'm the devil.
	Score.
	Now Halloween is saved, kids.
	Yeah.
	It's like if you found a pachinko machine that somehow still only cost 50 cents, but spat out a crappy gift that was like a three foot cubed egg.
	And you cracked it open and you were like, ah, sweet, terrible, plastic, devil, devil trident and toys.
	Yes.
	Okay, enough talking about how crappy the costume is.
	Uh, is there anything else?
	Uh, no.
	I do like that he, this is, I think it's funny, because his school board teacher, he has a Gab account.
	A Gab account?
	Like, okay, calm down.
	Um, and, uh, he tried to, like, get this going a couple times on Gab, and, like, the most he got was six shares on there, so it's like, and he's, like, Twitter's clearly the place for the, the hate mob, I guess.
	And I guess he was right, but if it, but if it failed, he could always use his Grindr account.
	You know he's got one.
	Yes.
	All right, well, thank you, Haley, for telling us.
	Happy Satanic Panic.
	Yes, happy Satanic Panic to you too.
	Oh, God, yeah.
	Dude, wait until D&D makes it to Arizona.
	You people are gonna lose your fucking minds.
	Let's move into our headline news segment for the week.
	From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
	So as we broke while we were recording last week, the folks have a new Speaker of the House,
	And that is who Mike Johnson is.
	I'm not getting this wrong?
	Yes, you nailed it.
	I nailed it, because I'm such a strong boy.
	Normal guy, Mike Johnson.
	Just a strong, normal, laid-back, 21st century conservative Nosferatu.
	Anyway, he's Mike Johnson, and it turns out that he's got some skeletons in his closet.
	And by skeletons, I mean a whole lot of incredibly predictable white nationalist bullshit, amongst other things.
	So, I'll toss it over to Mike to run down the sheet of what makes this guy a monster.
	I have him written here as Mike the Lunatic Johnson, which would be his boxing name.
	Yes.
	Mike the Lunatic Johnson.
	Is that a wrestling name?
	I think there's too many the lunatics in wrestling.
	We could also go for it.
	We could switch the positions of it and call him Crazy Mike Johnson, if you'd like.
	Yes.
	Yes, we could.
	Absolutely.
	We could do such a thing.
	Man, that is such a creative nickname.
	Crazy Mike.
	Crazy Mike.
	Yes.
	So our boy, Mike Johnson, on top of being the new Speaker of the House, is apparently a young Earth creationist who thinks that dinosaurs and man intermingled with each other back in the day.
	And they were on Noah's Ark, which is a thing.
	That's so cool.
	Which is a thing that he thinks is also real.
	I love the people who are just like, dude, people and dinosaurs were together.
	And also, Noah, he saved them dinosaurs.
	It's just like, where the fuck are they now?
	What the fuck happened to the dinosaurs?
	It was 3,000 years ago.
	People were writing stuff down by then.
	Did anybody write down what the fuck happened to the dinosaurs?
	There was a very tragic virus on Noah's Ark that killed all the dinosaurs exclusively.
	There was a reverse flood and it flooded the skies above human head level and only killed all the dinosaurs.
	Oh God.
	But yeah, so he has all that stuff going for him.
	He is aggressively against LGBTQ plus people.
	He pretty much wants to criminalize all non-heterosexual sex and probably also any form of sodomy.
	Yeah, he worked for, he was a lawyer for like 10 years for Alliance Defending Freedom, which is a Arizona-based, like, legal giant that is basically responsible for, like, a lot of the reproductive rights getting curbed back, including Roe, and also a lot of the anti-LGBT stuff that's, like, kind of actively going on.
	So he sucks!
	Yeah.
	I like that Hayley was hard in the ASMR voice there at the end and she realized it so she yelled, he sucks!
	He just pull you out!
	Because you were getting the tingle, you were feeling it, and then she just PAM!
	Yeah, if you thought this was chill fascism, you're wrong.
	No, she gave you the pop at the end there to jolt you out of that state that she put you into previously.
	I'm not planning on writing any punk music, but if I were planning on writing some punk music, I would totally isolate, you thought this was chill fascism, you're wrong!
	And I would put that as the intro to some sweet song.
	You thought this was show fascism?
	You're wrong.
	Yeah, so he had, so this guy is an extreme right wing nut on all the social issues.
	His first, his first try to be a big boy and write a bill that would actually pass the
	house and then the Senate and then get old president John Biden to put his Joey Bides
	to put his John Hancock on it.
	His first attempt at a bill is so fucking bad that literally everyone is laughing at him because he is tethering aid to Israel to be tied to massive cuts to the IRS.
	Which everyone's looking at him and is like, bro, what the fuck are you doing?
	That doesn't seem to be flying very well.
	So basically he's holding Israeli aid hostage and he's going to hold Ukrainian aid hostage.
	This guy is just going to step on an innumerate number of rakes, and he is also being exposed to a lot more sunlight than I think he ever thought he was going to be exposed to.
	Literally, as we were sitting down, I checked an article on the Daily Beast that says they've been digging into him, and the man seems to have no assets.
	He does not have a bank account in his name, according to what they saw.
	And they don't think that's actually true, but the actual like letter of the law is you don't have to disclose your bank accounts and congressional income reports if your bank account never got over $5,000 in it in savings.
	So this guy is basically broke with no assets and is a nut, which I'm not going to be a pro-rich politician here, but if this guy's literally living by his hand-to-mouth paycheck-to-paycheck, that's exactly how some rich group of assholes can be like, hey, Mike Johnson, would you like to do what you're told in exchange for piles of infinite cash?
	Exactly how Mike Raines sold out and started making Q-drops.
	Yes, it is!
	Exactly, exactly.
	Oh, God.
	This is, I mean, again, Jim Watkins, you've got nothing going for you.
	Like, Karma sends me videos of you and you are looking rough.
	Ruff, my friend.
	You need something to turn your fortunes around.
	And I'm here.
	I'm your boy.
	I know the lore.
	I can write that shit.
	I'll sign an NDA.
	I'll deny... I'll plausibly deny some shit.
	I can lift Aitkut up to shittiness.
	It'll be great.
	I can watch QAnon and be all excited about my drops.
	I'll be like, oh my god, these new drops are so good.
	They pop so hard.
	And I'll be like, yeah, I'm giving you idiots what you want, you morons.
	And now Jim Watkins has to pay me a bonus.
	Boom.
	Give me more money, Jim.
	That's right.
	Like, fucking make it rain.
	Bam.
	Mike rains.
	Making it rains with QDrops.
	Perfect.
	I'm glad that Mike is taking the burden of being the one of us who's thirsty for cash off of my plate this week.
	He's really thirsty for cash this week.
	I didn't have it in me this week.
	Halloween took it out of me.
	I was just like, I can't pretend to be a sellout this week.
	It's just not in me.
	I'll take the money if you want to give it, but I'm not begging for it.
	Our sponsor from liquid death.
	Liquid death.
	You know folks, if you just want to drink some regular ass water out of a can, well then I have a product for you.
	Do you want to drink water out of a can?
	Liquid Death.
	Water.
	In a can.
	Who would have thought that?
	What's in it?
	It's fucking water.
	Water.
	Why would you drink it?
	Because you're fucking thirsty.
	Water.
	It's got a crazy name.
	It sounds cooler than it is.
	It's water.
	Fucking water.
	I have to imagine that this ad read for Liquid Death is better than whatever they're doing.
	We are not sponsoring Liquid Death, everybody.
	No, this is not a paid sponsorship.
	We do not have money, unfortunately.
	I'm about to criticize them in a way that makes that very clear.
	Whenever I see their marketing, I kind of understand why it worked, but I also, like, it reminds me of the, like, marketing exclusively for men demographic from, like, the early 2000s.
	Like, like, Man Show targeted at men, where it's just like, hey, pussy, drink this fucking water!
	Boom!
	Liquid Death, it's fucking I do appreciate what they're doing, and I do not hate water, certainly.
	That would be a weird stance to take, being anti-water.
	So, I don't begrudge their success, but I will say that, to me, I equate their type of marketing with a very foul type of marketing that stings my nose.
	Hard to be mad at water in a can though.
	Unless you thought it was booze when you bought it, which I'm sure happens to a lot of people.
	Everybody get a reusable and just fill it up.
	I'd rather die than reuse a bottle.
	I'm gonna kill the planet.
	You gotta get a metal one like this, a Bubba.
	No, I get the dual layer water bottles because the insulation between the two layers of plastic really keeps the water slightly colder.
	And then I throw it directly into the garbage.
	This thing stays ice cold.
	No, I just don't drink as much water as I should.
	Maybe I should get on liquid death.
	How much does this expect of those?
	Oh, just kidding.
	I'll drink tap water, thank you.
	I just love that.
	I just love the idea of water being branded aggressively.
	All I want for my water is large.
	Drink water, pussy!
	Drink water, you stupid asshole!
	What I'm waiting for is the water that gets you laid.
	Like, drink this water and women will find you attractive.
	It's like, oh, okay, I guess.
	That's how you get into legal trouble.
	You don't say shit.
	Just water, that's it, boom, boom.
	Oh my God, that's it, we've nailed it.
	We've cleared the market out, we've done it.
	We can lie and say that it's got pheromones in it, the maintenance is like the limit.
	You just water.
	That's how you get into legal trouble.
	You don't say shit, you can imply a lot of stuff though.
	Yes.
	Anyway, we're wildly off topic.
	Are we done talking about Mike Johnson?
	I mean, he's a piece of shit that's wearing, like, human skin.
	It's not human skin.
	The horrible part is that he literally just got elected to the position successfully.
	Right.
	Because he is just capable of wearing a human mask.
	So many of these people are incapable of actually just like not saying the quiet parts loud
	that the one guy who's still capable of saying, again, a tremendous amount of horrible shit,
	just quietly, you know, he's not there screaming it.
	He's just like, you have to dig into him slightly.
	It's not all that hard, but you do have to look into him a little bit.
	Yeah.
	He just got there, and now this guy's the speaker of the fucking house!
	Right, and this guy, like, if you're Jim Jordan, you're just like, what the fuck?
	And it's like, sorry Jim, you actually covered up for a guy that was molesting wrestlers in Ohio State for literally forever.
	Like, that was the bar you had to, that was the low, low bar you had to clear was not being party to a massive sexual assault campaign.
	And also not being so openly stupid in public that people know who you are.
	And they're like, oh, that's that idiot who doesn't wear his suit jacket and yells a lot and covered up molestation.
	Yeah, so it's just, congratulations Republicans, this is your big win.
	Because this guy's real nickname should be Mike the who?
	Johnson.
	Nobody knew who this guy was until he was suddenly the House Speaker.
	And then all the people who did know who he was ahead of time were just like, no!
	You don't understand!
	Soylent Green hits people!
	Oh, tying this back to our show, as it were, the one last thing was when this guy got elected, people immediately saw the aggressive conservatism.
	They were like, oh, this is great.
	And then they saw that his first bill was aid for Israel.
	And they're like, oh, this fucking sellout.
	And now they're seeing that the Israel aid bill has a bunch of poison pills in it.
	They're back to loving him again.
	So basically he's just going to be on this massive teeter-totter.
	And when eventually he breaks down and somehow passes the Israeli funding, he'll be back to being an evil globalist shill.
	So enjoy your honeymoon with QAnon, Mike.
	It's not going to last very long.
	Yeah, absolutely bonkers stuff.
	Just can't get enough of these sweet, sweet conservative doofuses.
	I mean, at least they, like, shitty though the cog is, in theory they technically found a cog that will allow their machine to start working again, but after like two months of nothing, so I guess it is a big win for them?
	But it's a tremendous loss for humanity at large.
	Which, again, they don't care about.
	Moving on, speaking of tremendous losses for humanity at large, another day in America, another tremendous mass shooting incident, this time in Maine.
	A killer already dead of a self-inflicted unaliving, so that's great stuff there.
	but not before taking a bunch of life needlessly.
	And of course, whenever something like this happens, the people that we cover, shitty though they are,
	have opinions on it.
	So let's talk about the main killing shooter and a return to a familiar topic for fans of the show.
	Another day in America.
	Just a regular, for Bison it was Tuesday.
	Let's talk about MKUltra.
	Honestly, was this big news by you guys?
	Because it was kind of just a blip on the radar over here, which I felt was a little bit wild, given that it was one of the top ten.
	It was a big news story on the East Coast for as long as it took for them to confirm that the shooter was dead.
	And then it went away literally overnight.
	It became about, like, you know, honoring the dead or whatever, but, like, it was just like, okay, we found out where he went and hid, and as far as we could tell, like, he got there, then pretty shortly after he got there, he was like, well, that's it for me, and checked out.
	It was just out of the news cycle so quick, I was like, that's pretty wild that we're just at that point.
	Yeah, I mean, that's how it works.
	Our nation is so big that, like, outside of the threat radius, like, when one of these people is still out there, like, on the loose or whatever, like, outside of the threat radius, a lot of times it's just like, oh, there was a school shooting in that state yesterday?
	What?
	I didn't hear about that.
	Yeah.
	Which is insane!
	Could you imagine any other nation in the world just being like, we didn't hear about that school shooting?
	Get the fuck out of here!
	Yeah, like because around here it was crazy news because we basically had like a giant section of a state under lockdown for basically two days as they were trying to confirm that this guy was no longer a threat, which and Because people were talking about it at my at my work.
	I was listening to people talk about this guy like he was Rambo.
	Like they were like this guy was like hiding in the woods and he's like a military trained.
	He's like the most the most deadly hunter alive.
	Like we're all in so much trouble.
	And then it was just it was like thankfully the threat was over when they found out that he killed himself.
	But Yeah, just that paralysis for those couple of days when we didn't know what his status was was like that was what was really interesting.
	It was like after the Marathon bombing when Boston just literally shut down for a day because they were trying to find those two guys.
	It was just it was like that kind of weirdness and that was what was driving the news mostly was the threat of the threat of this continuing and then once it wasn't going to continue.
	Just moving along because this is America, just like a dozen, dozens of people get killed all the time by lunatics with guns.
	And that's just the way this works.
	Great.
	Also, for the record, I mean, when I, when it did get bumped, like for the news that I was looking at, it got bumped to go back to covering the fucking Israel-Palestine, like insanity.
	So it was just like, it wasn't like getting bumped to just be like, and now a dog with a bone.
	You're right.
	And now, genocidal war atrocities.
	Yeah.
	Like everyone's favorite two players.
	And it was just like, okay.
	It just, it is just wild how it just, I don't know.
	It was just weird.
	I was like, isn't it kind of like something that should be in the news like a little bit longer?
	I mean, especially for, and I hate to frame it like this, but I mean, it's just the ghoulist world that we live in.
	Especially because, like, the body count for this one was fairly high.
	The guy was trained.
	He went in there with a weapon.
	Nobody was suspecting it.
	A lot of them were actually deaf.
	So he ended up killing a lot of people.
	And it did just, like, it just sort of went away immediately as soon as the threat of him killing more people went away.
	And it's just like, yikes.
	That feels real bad.
	Yeah.
	But that's not what we're supposed to be talking about.
	Vice is diverted on my end.
	Back to the rest of the news.
	I think we're supposed to be talking about MKUltra.
	Oh yeah, right.
	I'm so sorry.
	Which is so much more fun than actually talking about this guy.
	Lots to the victims.
	Get to the silly.
	Yeah, no, so I don't know how much we've actually covered MKUltra on the non-premium content shows, because MKUltra... We talked about it a few times during the original QDrop stuff, certainly, right?
	Probably, but this is kind of like a refresher course anyway, so for those of you who don't exactly know what MKUltra is, both in reality and in QAnon world, In reality, MKUltra was the CIA freaked out about the idea that the KGB and the Soviet Union was going to be able to unlock the powers of the human mind, and that the Russians were going to have telepaths, that they were going to have people that could literally use their minds as weapons of war.
	And as a result... Now it's time for me to ask this question here.
	Were they trying to do that?
	I don't really, there's really not a lot of information about a Soviet version of MKUltra and if the Soviets actually did do this stuff.
	If that, like, literature is out there and that there is a knowledge of it.
	Have you seen Stranger Things?
	Yeah, also, for the record, I mean, it is nice to tell people what MKUltra is, but I was thinking, I was just like, Mike, I'm sure a lot of our listeners have seen Stranger Things, they do talk about MKUltra.
	Okay, yeah.
	So, like, original MKUltra was just this idea, and so we had to create our own psychics to defeat the Soviet psychics that were coming for us.
	So that was the noble intent of this.
	What actually ended up happening was mostly people were hitting each other with LSD and fucking each other up.
	And it was this giant mess of a situation where people were getting drugged and screwed up and they were being drugged about their consent, which was really not fucking cool.
	And All of that stuff happened, and then eventually in the 1970s, in the Congressional Church Committee, the existence of MKUltra came out, and General Ford, the president at the time, signed an executive order making it totally fucking illegal for the government to drug people without their consent.
	And that is the reality of MKUltra.
	Also Stranger Things, also the men who stare at goats, all that kind of stuff.
	QAnon MKUltra is that the program never ended, that the program was actually incredibly successful, and that the program creates sleeper agents that can be triggered by a handler to then go out and commit a mass shooting.
	And this is done by the Deep State in order to In order to push for gun control laws, even though this has never worked for the past million years in all of our mass shootings, the Deep State, stupid morons that they are, continue to launch these mass shootings to try to get gun regulations pushed forward.
	You would think the Deep State would try a different tactic to get their gun regulation agenda achieved, but no.
	It's just more mass shootings all the time, and then Congress refusing to act.
	It's great.
	It's very successful.
	One might think this is all bullshit that these people made up in order to hit and wave away the tragedy of mass shootings, but you'd be wrong because they're totally right about all of this.
	Man, what an elaborate and clever and tricky way to use your undetectable psychic sleeper agents.
	Yes.
	I'm sure there's certainly no other way you could pass legislation through if you could just train a person from birth to be a psychic sleeper agent.
	Right?
	You couldn't possibly just have everyone in Congress be a psychic sleeper agent that's under the control of the group of people that have done this.
	No.
	You just create hundreds, if not thousands, of wannabe mass shooters and then just unleash them whenever you feel like it.
	And that's just how this works.
	Taking this a step further, QAnon has also now created a narrative beyond this where pretty much anyone involved in mental health is part of this MKUltra operation because What us normal people see when they read these stories is mentally troubled guy with a lot of guns, gets therapy, therapy doesn't work, they go on a murder spree.
	What QAnon sees, and what they believe is the truth, is guy goes to see a therapist, therapist is like, hey, guy, do you have a lot of guns?
	And the guy's like, yes.
	And then he's like, what's your name?
	And they're like, Bob Smith.
	And then the therapist punches him up on the, on the sheet of the database.
	They're like, Oh shit, this guy's one of our MK Ultra sleepers.
	And your code word is green zebra balloon.
	Got it.
	Boom.
	Green zebra balloon.
	Go shoot up a school.
	And the guy's like, and just walks off and goes commit a murder.
	Oh yeah, the winter soldier.
	Everybody loves a winter soldiering.
	Yes, exactly.
	That's that's basically what like, pretty much now.
	That's one of the buzzwords they look for in stories about mass shootings is that if the mass shooter saw a therapist within the last six months, boom, that's when they got the code words.
	That's when they were triggered.
	That's when they were told to commit the shooting.
	And so The MKUltra has gone from just being a government operation to literally the entire mental health industry in the world is now part of this plot to create and to activate sleeper agents to commit mass shootings.
	Yeah, and it certainly couldn't be somebody with, like, a mental health issue that they, like, haven't gotten treated to the point where they're sort of in freefall, and then they finally decide to seek help, and it's too late.
	Because, like, there's only so much a medical professional can do at that point, you know what I mean?
	So it's like, it seems like if they had just, like, maybe a little bit earlier with that treatment for whatever issues were plaguing them, I could have avoided all of this, but by the time they got there, they were just like, you know, hearing voices and stuff or whatever.
	It's just like they had their sessions and then it was just like, you know, actually, I feel like I have a better way to get rid of the voices.
	Thanks.
	I'm going to take care of this myself.
	Oh, that is, oh, the voices.
	That's another thing that QAnon is very much convinced is part of this programming.
	They're convinced that schizophrenia and audio delusions are part of a government program, part of MKUltra, where they can actually beam the voices into your head.
	The government is doing this to you.
	The voices in your head are real.
	They're controlled by the government.
	They're using them to drive you mad.
	There's technology, they call it the Voice of God.
	There's some videos from the 1970s where these college professors have, the thing is, these college professors, they have these very large setups, and they can rig things, and if they do everything exactly right, they can, they're like, now I'm gonna turn this thing on, you're gonna hear something inside your head, and they can make this massive, elaborate setup hit your ears in a way where it's very weird and disquieting.
	But, uh, the way they make it work now is like you literally be walking down the street and your, your handler can just boom, put a voice in your head and you're just now.
	I mean, to be fair, kind of, they're not wrong.
	There, there is ways to do like directional sound wave stuff, like vending machines can use it in Japan, like, and it, you know, focuses.
	I've seen video game machines that do it too, like that they use engineering and techniques to sort of funnel where the sound goes so you can be playing a game that relies on sound, surrounded by a bunch of noisy-ass machines, like other machines.
	So yeah, there's technology that lets you sort of like...
	Like, you know, you could trick somebody into thinking that maybe they're, like, hallucinating a voice or whatever.
	But, again, what a fucking waste of that technology.
	Like, if you're using that to try to take over the world, certainly there's better ways to do it.
	Make the President of the United States go insane!
	Yes!
	Yeah, instead of mass shootings that achieve nothing, get no legislation passed, and only harden the resolve of lunatics who love guns, just turn your voices, Ray, onto Donald Trump and turn him into a flaming lib.
	Just hit him with the voice and then Trump's just like, oh, I'm actually talking to God and God wants me to take care of the environment and stop bothering gay people.
	Okay, God, you got it.
	Right?
	Or I mean, and again, comedy podcast, not suggesting doing anything, just a hypothetical, I'm in a situation here, it's like writing a short story, don't come at me for this, but with, just combine the two ideas.
	If you think that like, it's the fucking liberal deep state agenda that wants to take away your guns, don't you think a real effective way to do that would be to have somebody Like, that's already a member of Congress, like, get activated, pull out a machine gun, waste a bunch of conservative lawmakers, and then have everybody making a big discussion about whether or not we should look at guns, because somebody just... It'd be like the Capitol Massacre was like a big turning point in our gun legislation, because man, they killed 40 different Republican, like, senators that day, and it was wild.
	Like, you know, that seems like it would be a lot more effective than just having these people, like, activate and go into a Walmart and kill some kids.
	That's not doing anything!
	Why are the bad guys that are controlling our world so ineffective at controlling our world?
	That is the problem with your dumb story.
	Your story needs to have smarter villains that actually achieve their victories.
	Instead, your story is about how we're winning but we're losing and the world's in perpetual stalemate.
	Because the Patriots have some levers of power, but the Deep State's got other levers of power, but Argo-Margo.
	It's just like, no.
	Like, one side wins and it's just over.
	Just, like, fucking clear their shit out.
	We were having this conversation back when Joe Biden was a hologram, and it was really... I always wanted to say it was James Caan, but I don't think that was the actor.
	Which actor was it?
	James Woods was the guy who... James Woods, that was it.
	Yeah, it was James Woods in like a Mission Impossible-style super mask, and it's just like...
	Again, like, at least then, the technology was being aimed at the right guy.
	You were using your hologram technology to, like, make a hologram clone of the President.
	Right, exactly.
	Or, he's making THE President.
	But in the MKUltra stuff, it's just like, yeah, it's a global, it's a really subtle global program, man.
	You know, like, we do a lot of stuff, we pay off a lot of people, no one's ever talking because we're very good at our job and everybody really likes us.
	It's like, Again, it's like the Flat Earth Theory.
	Everyone's in on it for reasons that we just can't explain.
	Right.
	I forget where I saw this, but someone was just mentioning, why would Russia and China, who fucking hate us, be in with us on Flat Earth?
	Why is Vladimir Putin QAnon's greatest hero?
	They've got just as much to lose as the rest of you if the populace ever finds out the Earth is flat, because then everyone will start really doing the thing that makes that dangerous.
	Down with the bourgeoisie!
	It's the revolution!
	The first two people thrown off the edge of the flat earth are Putin and Xi Jinping.
	They're like, we knew it!
	No!
	This is why we were letting Biden get away with it!
	People are dressed like the cast of Les Mis, waving a big flag that's just got an earth on it.
	It's just like, wow, that's all it took?
	Incredible.
	We should have stopped lying about the shape of our earth a long time ago.
	Yes.
	Okay, getting a little long of the tooth here, so why don't we move on to our mailbag segment.
	Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
	It's time for Q and A. And also we'll get one of our PAs to go wake up Hayley.
	Can you go wake up the others?
	Oh, I just...
	Ha ha ha ha!
	Cleodora Silvestri, the Hellworld Grand Inquisitor says, It's wacky races time!
	Who are your favorite MAGA and Q racers, and what is a gimmick of their zany cars?
	Oh man, this is a great one.
	Matt Gaetz and MTG in the Cucumber Mobile.
	It's got an assortment of emoji-related powers.
	Yes.
	What is this?
	Just, like, we're making cars?
	You're welcome, Races!
	So, for Haley, who's not a fucking ancient cartoon aficionado, also known as a dorkus, the Wacky Races was a bunch of Hanna-Barbera cartoons that teamed up in pairs and had, like, a wacky unique vehicle that had all sorts of, like, wacky powers.
	It was Mario Kart Double Dash, but, like, 30 years previously in Hanna-Barbera cartoon universe.
	Okay.
	Um, okay.
	I don't know if I'm doing this right, but since we mentioned her and Brittany earlier, and this isn't saying that Brittany is a MAGA person or a Q person.
	Well, she could be.
	Who knows?
	We don't know her life.
	Yeah.
	I don't know.
	I don't know her bag, but Liz, it's her and Liz Kroken, um, in a Brittany mobile and it's Brittany.
	Have you seen that TikTok of her?
	Like I found these kitchen knives in my house.
	Yes, you have to watch that one a few times.
	It's pretty funny.
	And that's their mob- is there fighting involved in this?
	You can like- wow.
	I just really just went- puberty.
	It happened.
	Wow.
	No, I was exhaling a thing.
	So, they could fuck up each other's cars, yeah.
	So it could have, like, literal cartoon arms that come out of, like, Meccano arms with knives coming out of the sides.
	Yeah, it's Britney and she's slashing tires.
	Is the car Britney or is Britney in the car?
	You said it was two people in the vehicle, correct?
	It's two people in a wacky car.
	Liz is driving Britney's slouching tires.
	Oh, but the car's just a regular car.
	No, it's pink and pretty.
	It's pink and pretty but otherwise totally normal.
	It is fucking blasting Britney Spears music.
	Nice.
	Does it have any sort of like Kraken theme or Kroken theme?
	In the back, in the back seats, if you want, you can you can watch Liz's Britney Spears documentary.
	Oh, there we go.
	And the name of the car could be Slave Princess or whatever.
	Yes.
	That's correct.
	Yeah.
	When Disney gets their hands on it, they will have to change that name.
	So I don't know if I did that right, but that's my answer.
	I don't know who the second person would be, probably because they were two old-school grifters.
	I'll put the ancient and long-forgotten Joe M. in the car with Praying Medic, and the car will be an ambulance.
	Part of Praying Medic's gimmick was literally that he communed with God.
	When he was an EMT, before he became a QAnon grifter, there would be times when they would be bringing someone to the hospital, and Praying Medic knew he could save that person's life, but he didn't know if it was right to do it, so he would talk to God to make sure it was okay to lay on hands that person and save them.
	So, basically- Hey man, he can't spell EMT without lowercase t, aka the cross, you know?
	That's just how it goes.
	So, yeah, that would be their car.
	It would be an ambulance.
	I don't know what actual powers the car itself would have, but basically most of it would just be Praying Medic having God rebuke his enemies by raining down lightning, sulfur, and other such plagues.
	And when their car breaks down in the middle of combat, then Praying Medic can heal it and resurrect it.
	That should be the guy who's got like a gunshot wound and praying medic is like attending to him and then you just see like his eyes roll back in his head and looks at it and he's just like, no, God said it is your time.
	Walks off.
	What the fuck, man?
	No!
	Do you have to like take an oath or something?
	You're just like, nope, I'm actually hourly.
	Bye!
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, so I think that I very much approve of that question.
	Wacky races and that stuff is excellent.
	Yeah, and Hayley totally knew what it was and totally loved it as well.
	Yes, yes.
	Ailee was solid.
	Her answer was great, but the problem is that Asajj was sort of my partner in knowing weird, obscure nonsense.
	No, no, no, you don't have to apologize.
	I'm just saying that now it is probably more appropriate for the questions to be less focused about 1980s or earlier cartoons.
	We're on a journey and I'm learning.
	Those questions are really just for me and sometimes for my team.
	Mike teaches me about sports.
	You teach me about other things.
	We learn from you about the horror that is Arizona.
	Yeah, we're all just learning from each other.
	I do have pretty good taste in stuff, so I'm the first person to admit that most of the things I talk about on this show are fucking terrible.
	They're fun to talk about, but I don't advocate watching Turbo T. That just sucks.
	Thank you for the question.
	DR initially asks, how have the cube peddlers, or I mean influencers, pivoted the trials and guilty pleas of their favorite crack and hack?
	So the first way they've tried to spin this is that The Georgia DA overcharged.
	She knew she couldn't convict.
	So she did this bullshit and then took the plea deal because that was all she was going to be able to get these people on.
	And the second thing that I've seen people talk about is how the, the main like charge, the RICO charge, none of the people that have pleaded guilty have pleaded to a RICO charge.
	So obviously.
	The main thrust of the argument that's being made against Trump in this Georgia case is still unproven and is still bullshit.
	And Trump's going to beat this thing as he's going to beat all his charges.
	So, they're working.
	They're workshopping.
	They're finding ways.
	Sidney Powell is going on rants.
	She's losing her mind.
	She's talking about how she was, like, forced into pleading guilty.
	And I've seen some people talking about how maybe she might get her guilty plea withdrawn by the prosecutors.
	They might just take her to trial for being an idiot who refuses to, like, follow the in terms of the deal. I don't know if that's going to
	happen or not, but we'll see. I think it's more likely going to be when it comes time for Powell
	to testify against her fellow defendants if she does that. And if she doesn't, well, then it'll be
	her ass in the sling. So we'll see.
	But for the most part, they're just claiming that, you know, this is just bullshit.
	This is just prosecutorial malpractice.
	They're being assholes.
	And this is all going to work out in our favor anyways.
	And there are some people doing the QAnon shit about how You gotta plead guilty, and then when you testify, you zig when the prosecutor strikes you to zag, and when you start answering questions they don't want you to answer, you give away the truth, and you put that on the record, and then the deep state comes crumbling down, which is not how the legal system works.
	If you start saying an unresponsive answer to a question, the prosecutor objects to it, the judge strikes it down, and you actually can't get your information on the record.
	They're trying.
	They're going to make this work up until the moment it doesn't work, because that's all they've got.
	Well, there we go.
	I don't have anything to add, because that wasn't my question.
	Yeah, Hayley.
	Me and Hayley high-fiving over on the side, shunting that responsibility to Mike.
	Yeah, Mike, do your work.
	Me and Hayley are straight chilling over in the corner in the VIP section.
	Pancake Peasant asks, how can we support Serge while he's on his long-term undercover Deep State assignment?
	How can we assure the other beautiful babies that he's still a white hat when he fakes being a villain and does a heel turn?
	The easiest way would be patreon.com slash pokerpolitics.
	Thank you for your question.
	Sarge is off living his best life.
	He's on the farm.
	You can go see him and pet him and stroke his shiny coat and beard at some point.
	Any time you want.
	Just go upstate.
	He's at the farm.
	It's all good.
	Sarge is fine.
	Trust us.
	Sarge is living his best life currently.
	I can't say that.
	Sarge has been traveling a lot and actually live in La Vida Loca.
	I actually bought Sarge his Christmas present and I'm very excited.
	I could say what it is because I know for a fact he doesn't listen to the show, but I won't spoil it for anybody.
	It is coming from the far off land of Japan, Bersarge, of course.
	Netch!
	Yeah.
	So thank you for the question.
	And finally, Eric Supports the Current Thing asks, Have you guys thought about merch, t-shirts, bumper stickers, funko pop figures?
	They'll do a funko pop of anyone.
	If they did a funko pop of us... Are we all anonymous?
	Or would it just be three blank guys?
	Well, I mean, we've made endless jokes about stuff to put on merch, and I'm certainly sure that if we wanted to find a clever way to make some merch, we could.
	At the very least, we could bend the knee at the altar of AI and do a very unethical merch, which we won't do.
	But we could, if we wanted to.
	And I believe I probably speak for everybody when I say we haven't done merch because I have difficulty imagining anybody wanting to buy it.
	That is so true, King.
	Nobody buys it.
	Like, three people.
	I don't want to have, like, overflow merch stuff, so it would at the very least have to be some sort of weird, like, direct-to-consumer, on-demand merch thing, and that sounds expensive.
	I can figure it out.
	If you've got deep pockets and you think you would be willing to order like 4,000 mugs or something, we could find a funny logo to put on that for you.
	I might be able to figure it out.
	If someone legit wanted a design, maybe we could shit one out.
	I have ways.
	I have artist friends.
	Like if I was ever getting to the point where I was making like merchandise that I was planning to sell, like I would just reach out to somebody and like commercially, like I would be like, hey, I need to buy this art from you for commercial use.
	So let's figure out a price.
	We have no fans, listeners.
	I want you listeners to know, the few that are listening, we have no fans.
	Yeah, you fan of the show because this is the part of the show that's like essentially garbage time.
	We're done talking about QAnon.
	All the QAnon fans are gone.
	So it's just us and you, listener, who can hear this but also doesn't exist.
	Schrodinger's listener.
	Shout out Stephanie.
	That's our fan.
	But I think they're technically just part of the show.
	Oh, yeah.
	People that are affiliated with the show can be fans of the show.
	And people that are affiliated with the show can also think the show sucks, like us.
	The people who make the show.
	We do one take, everybody.
	This is a real Ed Wood production here.
	They're going to pretty much figure out how much fucking editing we do as soon as they get to that weird noise I made.
	They're going to get to that incredibly awkward noise I made and just be like, they kept this, Ed?
	Oh yeah, you better believe it.
	It's in there, baby.
	I thumped the mic in my face like two weeks ago and I heard it when I listened back.
	I was like, there it was.
	That's when it hit my face.
	I actually had a listener last week, Cleodora Silvestri actually asked me, was there a problem with the recording?
	Because during the mailbag, you guys were really talking over each other a lot.
	And I'm like, no, that's just how Hayley and Elle are.
	It's just...
	The reality of the situation is that I've been performing content with Mike over the course of a few different attempts at doing stuff for 15 years.
	And also, Mike and I have been friends in real life and pattering with each other for 20 years or longer.
	So we have a lot of rapport.
	So I can't see you.
	I can't see you.
	The listener needs to understand this.
	I can't see you.
	I don't know when you're opening your mouth.
	I'm mysterious!
	It's part of my vibe!
	How else am I supposed to continue to maintain my identity and still chill, laid back 21st century Nosferatu?
	I believe that picture I sent to Hayley to show her my Halloween costume is literally the first time she's ever seen what I look like.
	I didn't realize that at the time.
	He's mysterious.
	I'm realizing this in retrospect.
	I would have used a better photo.
	You see all my best looks in the mornings.
	That's hilarious.
	Anyway, yeah, so the reality of the situation is no, that wasn't an audio issue.
	That's just, you know, getting used to recording with a new person over time.
	It'll get better.
	We... I'm getting better.
	I'm getting better.
	Look, I shut up so much now.
	I mean, it doesn't fall on just you.
	You don't have to apologize for shit.
	No.
	Also, for the record, we do appreciate our listeners.
	We know that there are listeners that are hearing this, and we do really appreciate you, so... Thank you to the five.
	We're just not rich or famous, and we probably are not famous enough to have merchandise.
	I yeah, so maybe I'll find yeah, if we can find some sort of like on demand site, I'm sure like Redbubble or Zazzle or something has something along those lines.
	So if there's like two or three lunatics out there.
	I'll make stickers.
	We will look into stickers then.
	Maybe I'll holler at Molly and see what she might charge for a commercial license on the troop Obama.
	Yes!
	Finally, it brings us to our last question as always.
	What are you guys looking forward to?
	Uh, you know, that's actually a fucking dynamite question, and somehow I was caught off guard by it this week, very much in the style of Hayley.
	What up?
	I know.
	I just hadn't really considered it.
	I mean, I had a day yesterday, so... I don't know.
	I have the rest of the day to myself.
	I am very hungry.
	I think I'm just going to be fat today.
	I love those days.
	I think I'm just going to be a big fat fatty today.
	I'm just going to order some big fat greasy food and just be... well, continue to be fat.
	That's called self-care.
	Dude, I'm gonna be McLovin' it.
	I'm gonna be laid up in my bed with my big fatness.
	Like, nobody to please but myself.
	Throw my arms behind my head like Chewbacca.
	Great.
	Classic.
	How about you, Hayley?
	I guess I'll just, the easy answer, since I've been talking about it, the Diamondbacks game tonight, because if they lose tonight, they just lose, right?
	That's how it works.
	Yeah, it's over.
	You're done.
	That's so funny!
	Damn, because the last two games and tonight is here in Arizona.
	And I was told by a certain somebody that that is like better, you know, like, oh, home game, you know, the teams usually do better.
	I don't know anything about sports, so I was like, cool, so I guess they'll probably do good.
	They have not been doing good here while in Arizona, which is funny.
	I don't know anything about sports, so I don't care if they win or lose.
	I kind of was hoping that they would, I guess, win, because that's like hometown spirit, right?
	I would like to see if... I want to see how we... I want to see how Arizonans party when they win.
	You know how, like, some states, like, they start flipping cars and they need to grease poles in some places?
	I want to see if there's any of that energy.
	And that's only going to happen if we win, so I want... I'm looking for that greasy pole energy.
	I want sports riots.
	Yeah, Quartz Riot energy.
	I mean, you need to go to New England for that.
	New England loves a Quartz Riot.
	I'd flip a car.
	Win or loss.
	Well, we're done with that for the time being, unless the Celtics do something, because the rest of our teams are absolute ass at this point, but yeah.
	Aren't the Bruins paddling everyone's ass?
	Yeah, I mean, but that's the... Our guard is up, because like last year the Bruins were super incredible, the greatest team in the history of the world, and then they got bounced in the first round of the playoffs, like the bums they are.
	So it's like, the Bruins could win every game in the regular season, and Boston would just be like, yeah, let's see if they're going to count.
	Dude, but you've got the diamondbacks around, like the big stage, dude, anything's possible.
	It's sports, baby.
	Rudy, baby.
	This is true.
	This is true.
	I'm just saying that they broke my heart last year.
	Remember the Titans, baby?
	Yes, sometimes.
	Go Bags.
	Go D-Bags.
	Bax.
	I know.
	No, she said what she meant.
	I know what I said.
	Honestly, that is the most legitimate excuse for that mascot pairing.
	Even if you're just like, this state is riddled with this particular snake, which is why our team is named that.
	They're all over the place.
	You just can't throw a rock without hitting one.
	It'd be like, are you sure that it's not because it sounds like douchebags if you really wanted to?
	I'm also looking forward to the World Series probably concluding.
	Who do you want to win?
	Wow, Savage.
	I wanted the Diamondbacks to win because I was rooting for you and also because The baseball purists people were going to be more upset if the Diamondbacks won because they were kind of the last team to make the postseason.
	And so if they had won, they would have been like, oh, it's like so fraudulent.
	Like the regular season doesn't mean anything.
	It's like the regular season does mean nothing.
	I hope you learned that lesson a million years ago.
	Like the playoffs kind of invalidate the regular season.
	That's how sports in America works.
	Like, this isn't, like, really tricky.
	I don't know how you didn't grasp that a million years ago, you dumb, quote-unquote, sports purists.
	Also, I will say that for the record, as somebody who truly hates baseball and therefore has less than zero dog in this race, I am also hoping that the Diamondbacks win, if only because it appears to be giving Hayley's life an additional enhancement.
	So, go Diamondbacks.
	Continue to win so that Hayley can continue to enjoy sports, because that has been a fun thing to watch happen.
	The weird thing this postseason is that the Texas Rangers, the enemies of the Diamondbacks, they have never lost on the road this year.
	And this has continued in this series where they've won the first two games in Arizona.
	So this is the last chance for the Diamondbacks to actually make them lose a road game.
	I'm channeling my energy into them.
	Yes.
	Me too.
	And what's really funny is the Rangers best hitter and one of their pitchers both got injured in the game before this.
	And everyone was like, oh shit, they're hurting.
	They're on the ropes.
	The Diamondbacks are going to get back into this thing.
	And then the Diamondbacks lost 500 to nothing last night.
	It was absolutely... They got one.
	No, you got seven.
	Oh yeah, that's right.
	Actually, I stopped kind of watching a little bit.
	Yeah, when it was 10-0, you could have stopped watching.
	But then it was like 7, and I was like, dang, they really did that too bad they got fucking smoked near the beginning.
	Exactly.
	But yeah, so I'm looking forward to that.
	Even though baseball is terrible, I will watch any competition if it's high level.
	I mean, I'll watch curling, I'll watch darts, I'll watch Anything.
	If it's two people fighting to be the champion of the event.
	I'm like, I'm in.
	I'll watch that.
	So I'm here for that.
	And then I will... I'm also...
	I'm crossing my fingers and toes rooting for the Patriots to lose this week because fuck our terrible team.
	They need to lose all their games and get a high draft pick.
	And it's really frustrating because they're playing the Washington football team this week and Washington decided to just give up because If you don't know about the storied history of the Washington football team... Oh brother, make it short, Mike.
	It's gonna be very short.
	They were owned by a dumb racist asshole named Dan Snyder who would not change their terrible racist name until he was absolutely forced to by the universe.
	And finally the NFL forced his ass out.
	They finally made him sell the team.
	So the new owner bought the team and now that guy is just taking a blowtorch to the current team.
	He is going to remake the Washington Commanders in his own image.
	So this week was the NFL trade deadline, and if you were a Washington football player of any quality, you were traded for a bag of balls.
	So my Patriots, who are absolute dogshit, are now going to be playing a team that was literally made objectively worse by ownership.
	That was their plan.
	So if the Patriots can lose to that team, God, they're the worst.
	And I really hope it happens.
	So that's what I'm rooting for this week.
	It's going to be super important for them to tank the rest of the season so they're going to get a high draft pick because I'm sure that Bill Belichick's got his eye on a really spicy left guard or something.
	No shit.
	Oh my God.
	This is going to fucking happen.
	And with the first overall pick of the NFL 2025 season draft, Dirk Moluski, kicker from Pittsburgh University.
	It's so fucking happening.
	Oh my god.
	The sad thing about this is L has only the most tangential knowledge of the Patriots and even with that he knows exactly how fucking terrible we are at drafting.
	I love it.
	It's so fucking accurate.
	Yeah, it used to look real spicy when he was just, like, pulling shit off of the heap to build a round of Tom Brady, but it turns out that you can't build a whole team out of the bubblegum leftovers that nobody wants.
	You need fucking real talent, and it can't be, like, on the line.
	You need, like, high-impact receivers.
	Yeah, you need skill.
	They're called skill positions for a reason, and we are fucking totally against accurately identifying and drafting skill.
	Cannot fucking do it.
	A very unskilled team.
	Everybody does it.
	Yes.
	All right.
	Well, on that note, we're going to go ahead and some little wheels are going to pop out of our armchair quarterback and coaching here.
	We're just going to ride that comfy chair into the sunset and out of Hellworld for the week.
	Thank you so much for listening!
	If you stuck around for what ended up being a little bit longer of an episode than normal, we do appreciate all of our listeners for supporting the show.
	If you continue to support the show for free, actually, you could do it slightly harder by giving us a 5-star review wherever you get your podcasts from.
	If you have money and you want to give it to us, you can do so by visiting patreon.com slash PokerPolitics, where you can give us a donation every month, tip your dealers, and if you do so to the tune of $5 or more per month, you get access to all of our bonus content.
	Which I highly recommend, because we talked about some pretty funny stuff there, including getting much deeper into MKUltra in some of our series.
	So go check that out if you'd like to.
	Big shout out to this week's beautifuller baby, Jonathan N. Jonathan N., beautifuller baby for this week.
	Thank you so much for your support.
	Welcome.
	What a king.
	Or queen, however you identify.
	Whatever.
	If you don't like royalty, it's cool, too.
	What a cosmic entity.
	We're all made of stardust, you know?
	If you have money, you don't want to give it to a few dicks that talk about nothing on the internet.
	We totally get it.
	There's a bunch of ways you could do some good with it in the world today, but we'll just go ahead and continue to suggest love146.org.
	They're an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
	Thanks, as always, for the use of our intro song to the great DJ Minimal Effort.
	No social media for them.
	Gnatch.
	However, you can still find our buddy Frosty until they tell me to stop saying that you can by getting off of Twitter, because Twitter sucks.
	At FrostyVO, of course, on Twitter, which sucks.
	You can find the show on Twitter, which sucks, at Hellworld, with a Q instead of an O. You can find myself on Blue Sky, which sucks, in a different way, at The Mysterious L. Haley, also on Blue Sky, which sucks, in a different way, at Arizona Right Watch.
	And Mike Rains, wherever the winds take social media traveler at Poker Politics, including Twitter and Blue Sky, which both suck in their different ways.
	For another successful episode of the Adventures of Hellwell Podcast, I have been one of your hosts, The Mysterious Hell, joined by our expert in all things Arizona crazy, Haley, aka Arizona Right Watch, and our expert in all things QAnon crazy, Mr. Mike Rains.

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