Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool

July 21, 2022 - Adventures in HellwQrld

01:38:27

Adventures in HellwQrld Episode #96: Elon and Bannon losing in court

It's another week of madness and we are here to talk about Boebert's grill being shut down, people 'investing' in Trump bucks and Elon Musk and Steve Bannon having a rough go of it in court. Get bonus content on PatreonSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hellwqrld. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	♪ Content Warning...
	The Adventures in Hellworld podcast talks in depth about QAnon, which means we have to talk about all kinds of child abuse and violence against people.
	Listener discretion advised.
	Hello, everybody.
	I am Mike Rains, a.k.a.
	Poker and Politics, and welcome to another episode of Adventures in Hellworld.
	I am joined, as always, by Sarge.
	Hello.
	I don't even really hear the opening music anymore.
	It's just, like, something I sit through.
	And the mysterious Elle.
	Domo arigato, beautiful babies.
	Doo doo doo doo doo doo.
	Dooga dooga dooga dooga.
	Look, one minute over here.
	That'll be our new intro theme.
	We'll just aggressively steal from that song.
	It'll be awesome.
	Domo.
	Yes.
	And then we'll be like, hey, Polysix, a group no one's ever heard of.
	We're taking your version of the song.
	So we have to stop everything.
	Q posted another million posts, right?
	Just checking in real quick.
	Q, still posting?
	Oh, no.
	Our hero, our savior, still dormant since June 29th.
	He showed back up.
	He didn't sleep.
	He has to recharge his batteries.
	What a surprise.
	Before we get into the amuse-bouche, I am cutting off Mike to do this just because it seems like important business for the people that it's affecting.
	So starting, I believe, with this episode, if not next episode, we will be uploading the podcast to our Patreon as well on the free side for no additional bucks because apparently some of our users who had been using the Acast app to listen to us, I guess that's not a thing anymore.
	There's some sort of problems with it.
	Or whatever.
	So, if you need another avenue through which to consume the podcast, it will be for free on our Patreon.
	And while you're there, why don't you sign up?
	Oh yeah, and while you're there enjoying our free content, give us money.
	Give us so much money.
	We'll be like, oh, the free stuff is so good, let's just deposit all of our currency at them.
	Do we have a $1 tier that gets them in on all our bonus content?
	We have a $5 tier to get them in on our bonus content.
	That's how much I know.
	We should have a $1 Bitcoin tier that gets them something incredible.
	Yes, that's the Buy Us an RV tier.
	That's like the tier for the Queen of the World, who used to be the Queen of Canada, but then she got the upgrade.
	Anyway, let's show the people what they're bidding for.
	And get to our hottest newest segment, the Amuse-Bouche!
	It's time for a light sampling of insanity.
	Get ready for the Amuse-Bouche!
	And first item, Local Man calls it our newest segment when we've been doing it for months.
	I mean, it is still our newest segment.
	Yeah, you got me there.
	You are technically correct, which is the best kind of correct.
	I dare you to challenge me on this.
	I love that all three of us were thinking technically correct at the same time.
	I just didn't say it.
	We share one and a half brain cells.
	So, Q's still not posting.
	We're not quite at a month yet.
	Do you want to take over Unders on when we think he might, like, rise again?
	Let's be real.
	Q still hasn't posted in, like, two years or whatever.
	Yeah.
	You're not wrong.
	Yeah, there's just no way to know, because I didn't think he was ever coming back.
	I mean, Jim Watkins seemed like a much worse cue than Ron Watkins was.
	He was in there shitposting with people.
	He was just like, I dare you to challenge me, I'm going to respond to this.
	And it's just like, what?
	You're cute, man.
	You're not supposed to play ball.
	You drop the crumbs, and you watch as they pick up the crumbs.
	You don't get in there and start dictating shit.
	What are you doing?
	Q did a lot of riffing and yes-standing, right?
	Like, I assume... Well, I mean, Q's schtick was, for the most part, just, uh, he started the thing with the spy novel that we got most of the way through, but towards the end, like, his whole job was to just say, like, hey, that guy, he really nailed it on that point, and, ooh, this guy had a really good decode, so, yeah, Q's job was mostly just to give people, like, head pats and tummy rubs and tell them they were doing a good job.
	I believe in the video game, Parlance, that is called maintenance mode.
	That's what they put Q into, maintenance mode.
	No new content is coming out from Q, but they will continue to support the server.
	I think my favorite moment of Q's interactions with his dum-dum audience was when he posted a fake Patton Oswalt tweet.
	It was a real tweet, but it was photoshopped in at the time at Ping Pong.
	Some QAnon follower was like, Q posting this is bad because it makes us look like a bunch of dummies that are following fake things that are obviously photoshopped.
	And then Q basically hit him with the Obi-Wan-from-a-certain-perspective-I-was-right-about-your-father argument when it comes to Darth Vader and being killed and killing Anakin.
	And Q was just like, hey man, if you don't understand how I'm right about this, you're not getting it.
	And it was just like pissy, pedantic, defensive bullshit.
	It was great.
	But I mean, there were times... Maybe Jim Watkins is Q, but only when Q is supposed to be in maintenance mode.
	And Ron is the guy that writes the new hot shit.
	Yeah, Ron's the new expansion.
	And this is when Jim overstepped here.
	He was just some crumb bum that was just supposed to be there to answer GM tickets or whatever.
	Then he started trying to code new shit into the game.
	They're like, what are you doing?
	I always wondered, do you think, I don't know if we ever mentioned it, do you think they drafted stuff in advance?
	I know there was misspellings and stuff, but do you think they sat around the table at night and they're just like, what are we, let's write up all the cue posts for tomorrow.
	I mean sometimes it was obviously yes, right, because the upload, there was only like three seconds between upload times that there would be like full-on paragraphs worth of text.
	Yes, the early drops definitely had drafting.
	That was something that we even said that when we went through them.
	Yeah, we mentioned it.
	Back before it got to maintenance mode, obviously some of the stuff was drafted ahead of time.
	But I feel like it was still pretty clear that every once in a while whoever was behind the wheel would just sort of like get in there and get sort of jazzed with it because it was like 2am and they were kind of drunk.
	Yeah, you can definitely tell when there were some, the more off-the-cuff ones.
	But yeah, those early ones when it was the other guy, there was a lot more drafting it looks like.
	But yeah, I saw the amuse-bouche because I just wanted to talk about actual queue for a minute.
	How about you shut up so we can talk about... Yeah, I just wanted to do one quick thing before we got to the boosh about the off-the-cuff shit.
	In two of the early Q posts, Q uses the term poof!
	with an exclamation point.
	Did we not get to those?
	Man, we would have had a heyday with that.
	Uh, we got to the first one because it was Qdrop7.
	I missed it.
	It ends with, it says, quote, remember he lied about knowing but ultimately came out in the dump.
	Poof!
	And he did it again in Qdrop 91, which we didn't get to, and he repeated that same phrase about Obama knowing about the secret emails that Hillary was running, and he repeated the line about her, about Obama knowing it, and it came out in the dump.
	Poof!
	So yeah, Q loved poof.
	I'm sure there was hot poof delta decodes.
	Anyways, so uh we did we did talking about this horseshit so we can get talking about what's really important which is uh the decline of our favorite restaurant.
	It's closed now.
	Lauren Boebert's Poor Stupid Restaurant, which, was the name of it actually Shooters?
	I can't remember the name of it.
	I think it may have been Shooters.
	I thought you were just calling in our notes, our show notes here, he hasn't written it as a moose boosh, no more Shooters, and there's no kaba there.
	So I thought you were just in the notes calling it was a moose boosh, no more Shooters.
	Like, hip hop style.
	That's crazy.
	In that context, I don't even know what a shooter is, mate.
	I didn't either.
	What an incredible mythos you're creating in your head for yourself.
	I just thought you dropped some sick lingo on me that I wasn't cool enough to know.
	Yeah, I'm hip.
	I'm with it.
	I watch TikToks on my commute.
	You know how it is.
	Uh, it was, yeah, it was actually Shooter's Grill.
	That was the name of the place.
	It was Shooter's Grill, and the gimmick of the place was that all the waitstaff were open-carrying, so you could just, like, have, yeah, you could literally- And you, as a patron, were encouraged to bring your gun.
	Yes.
	They were just like, yeah, come have, like, a plate of, like, corned beef hash or whatever, but also, like, make sure that you have an AR-15 with a bump stock with you, because America, or whatever.
	Yeah, I worked at a place where we open-carried all the time, too.
	It was the Army.
	There were a lot of people I didn't feel comfortable about doing that there.
	Like, if I go to my local Hooters and every waitress is open-carrying, I'm gonna be a little nervous.
	A little jittery.
	I don't think I'm gonna be able to enjoy my $5 appetizers.
	I just love that you called them appetizers.
	That really just sold it for me.
	I mean, because that's what I think.
	When I want to go to what were derisively called restaurants back in the day, when I go to a place like that, what I really care about is that everyone around me has a firearm.
	Yeah, I want them packing both in multiple senses.
	Just to be extra gross.
	Yeah, but I mean like your erection at a restaurant is probably not going to hurt anybody.
	If your erection goes off, it's probably not going to accidentally kill somebody at their birthday party or whatever.
	just me and my future employment opportunities. Like, oh my god.
	So what like I, I, when you call a place shooters, it's is it
	like an Applebee's knockoff? Or is it a Hooters knockoff? I just
	I think that was sort of like the Big Biscuit or whatever, right?
	Wasn't it just sort of like a regular ass sort of eatery?
	I believe all the other things I've seen about it didn't make it look any sort of special or gimmicky, aside from the fact that everyone just had guns.
	Maybe I'm wrong about that.
	Either way, it's closed now, so we'll never get to find out.
	Oh man, yeah.
	I guess she's just too busy trying to destroy America to run her business.
	Did the restaurant, was it like, okay, here's your first day, here's your apron, your notebook, and your Glock?
	Guns are expensive, and I think that's illegal, so I have to imagine that in order to get employment there, you had to own your own firearm.
	Yeah, I'm looking at a photo of the grill, and there's three women who are all, they're wearing short shorts, and one of the women has a shirt that says, I am security, the second one has a Shooter's Grill shirt, and the third one has Molon Lobby, because why wouldn't you have a Molon Lobby shirt?
	And behind the women is a cutout of Donald Trump wearing a MAGA hat, so that's, Make America grill again, am I right?
	If only they had done that!
	Oh my god, if only.
	Man.
	Yeah, it's all the standard hokey, just gun culture nonsense, along with just Yeah, along with women just wearing... It looks like Texas Roadhouse is basically the way the uniforms look.
	It's just blue jeans with a black shirt.
	It's accurate Texas Roadhouse.
	Yes, yes.
	Everyone has guns and the stakes are huge and mediocre.
	Yes.
	Anyway, so maybe they were having financial trouble, and you know what probably could have helped them out?
	A bunch of Trump bucks.
	I don't know what the fuck this is, I'm not gonna lie.
	Yeah, what the hell are Trump bucks?
	Sometimes when it comes to determining what we're gonna talk about, I will have Mike and or Sarge send me stuff ahead of time, and what Mike sent me simply said, Trump bucks.
	And I was just like, okay, well I sort of, through context I can imagine what this is, but I don't actually know.
	Yeah, so Trump Bucks are a scam being run by some grifters which features the horrifying visage of a colorized Donald Trump Wait, this isn't a crypto?
	No, this isn't crypto. This is an actual like physical piece of like, I guess paper that
	Bro, it doesn't get it doesn't get less fungible than that.
	Am I right guys?
	Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is this. I mean, again, the the image of Trump on the front of this
	thing is so unprofessional and so crummy that oh my god, it's it's just garish.
	The whole thing is a testament to bad taste.
	And basically the person or the group that's running it, they have all these provisos and disclaimers, and I've now just sent you the horrifying image of the $1,000 bill, where this is just memorabilia for Trump's 2024 campaign and get in and all this kind of stuff.
	There's also a subculture of people who are turning this into another Iraqi dinar slash Jaseera Naseera scam where these Trump bucks are going to be actually valued at $1,000 a bill once the storm hits, once the event happens, once we've sent all the liberals to Gitmo.
	Any day now.
	You'll get to kick the football, Charlie Brown.
	Don't worry.
	Right.
	At some ill-defined point in the very near future, these Trump bucks are going to be redeemable for the face value of them, which is $1,000.
	These bizarre, hideously made, cheap pieces of shit are actually going to be $1,000 a pop.
	And you can buy them for much less than $1,000 a pop.
	Surely this isn't like an actual Trump thing.
	No, this is some... the website lists ClickBank, and it says trusted with a little lock secure, and at the top it says, please note, due to overwhelming popularity, shipping may be delayed.
	Indefinitely, you suck.
	I guarantee these are made in China and he's having trouble getting them shipped if he's actually making them at all.
	So I thought when Mike said Trump Bucks, I thought he was referencing like Itchy and Scratchy Land or like Disneyland or places like that.
	I didn't know that these were Bison Bucks.
	That's much funnier to me that these are Bison Bucks.
	I don't know if I think it's cooler that it's some scammers using Trump's image to scam diehard MAGA chuds.
	And, like, obviously without Trump's permission.
	So do we know if any of the people that we're tracking, are they biting on this?
	Or are they the only people that we have eyes on, like, part of the scam?
	Uh, right now it's only people who are part of the scam.
	The actual, like, uh... Ah, so in that way, it is like Bitcoin.
	Bazinga!
	Yeah, I have yet to see any of the major QAnon promoters promoting this.
	I found out about this somehow in the wild, because I had someone at the casino come up to me and be like, hey, have you heard about these Trump bucks?
	And then I was just like, oh my god.
	And I had to go digging into it.
	And then I found out, like, basically.
	Hey, have you heard about these Trump bucks?
	Do you accept these Trump bucks?
	Take these Trump bucks.
	I would like $1,000 United States dollars, please.
	Yeah, so if you want, you can go to the ClickBank website and put in your information and get all of your identity stolen.
	Yes, you can get all your identity stolen and you can get $100,000 Trump buck bills for only $500.
	I mean, you'd be a fool not to.
	Oh my God.
	And to pay for that, you just need to go buy gift cards and scratch off the codes on the back and email them to this email address.
	If you get the platinum Trump buck, you get to go on a whimsical competition, murder competition, and maybe meet Trump.
	You won't meet Trump.
	You will be murdered.
	Yes.
	Well, you know, everybody's got their own scam.
	It's bigger than their own scam.
	Ron Watkins might be coming back to a Trump rally, happening in Arizona, I believe.
	Mike, fill us in, because, like, secondary or tertiary daddy might be coming home.
	I guess if Q is not supposed to be Rod Watkins, even though it is, then I guess Q would be daddy, or, well, Trump would be daddy, then Q would be daddy 2, and then Rod Watkins would be daddy 3.
	How gross is listening to you do daddy math?
	Dude, only as gross as you want to make it, you fucking perv.
	L isn't asking people to call him daddy or anything like that.
	This isn't getting into that fetish.
	I mean, we're just talking about the honest fact that QAnon and these people who yearn for an authoritarian rule, they have a desperate desire for a daddy figure.
	And L was just going through the literal, like, holy trinity of QAnon, where you have, like, the father, Trump, The sun, Q, and the Holy Spirit, Ron Watkins on Aidkun, pulling the levers to make it all work.
	Yeah, I'm not asking anybody to call me daddy.
	Who am I?
	Any woman I've ever met on a dating website in the past decade.
	I like blinked and that became a very popular thing.
	And I was just like, oh no, I'm very uncomfortable.
	Past.
	Hard no.
	So anyhow, Ron Watkins on his actual telegram page, not on the weirdo Ron Watkins Chronicles
	telegram page, posted a thing about the Save America rally in Prescott Valley, Arizona.
	That will be coming up in two days, this rally will be happening.
	And it says, if you see me or someone from my campaign team, please say hi and we will give you campaign merchandise while supplies last.
	And then it has a link to donating to Ron Watkins for Congress and finishes with, have a great day and God bless, because God, Ron's mailing it in.
	My God, Sarge might be able to live his dream.
	All you have to do is go to this rally and you can cop some merch.
	I want Ron merch so bad.
	It sounds so fucking lame.
	Oh, well, it's entirely possible that Arizona Right-Wing Watch, who has... We actually, we now have confirmation we have a hate listen.
	Because some person who was doing like a negative review of Arizona Right-Wing Watch quoted a comment that Arizona Right-Wing Watch made in her interview with me on the podcast.
	So we actually have people doing oppo research of their enemies by listening to us.
	You know what would really show us?
	If they donated $20 a month to our Patreon.
	Yeah, all the stuff where we talk the secret shit on you.
	Our bonus content as well as secret nuggets that you could get us with.
	And for you, listener, a special price of $20.
	Right, for everybody else it's 5, but if you're a headlesser it's 20.
	We just finished 2,000 mules and it totally flummoxed us.
	Dinesh was 100% right, but you'll have to pay to hear us say that.
	Right, and also at one point we get on the phone with George Soros and we start sweating.
	We're explaining to George how we don't know.
	We don't know how we can deal with Dinesh's undeniable truth.
	We need better talking points.
	And George gets really mad at us and starts yelling at us.
	You can hear Lady Gaga in the background.
	It's terrifying.
	I mean, if you are a deep state shill, which we are, it's bad times.
	So, yeah.
	And we talked directly to Hillary Clinton's adrenochrome dealer.
	Yes, yes.
	But again, all behind the paywall.
	It's shilling over, you goons.
	It's too early for that.
	Oh man, yeah, no, I definitely want lame-ass Ron merch that is gonna age so well.
	But remember, we talked about this.
	It's the sort of thing that you would have to keep to yourself and only appreciate yourself because it would be impossible to tell anybody that you're doing it ironically.
	So if you displayed that, it would be just bad times for you.
	Yeah, people would know it's ironic.
	You would need to have that tucked away in a secret drawer or something just for you.
	And then at some point, your partner will discover it and just be like, what the fuck is this?
	And just be like, it's not what it looks like!
	It's ironic!
	She would know because she knows about the pod.
	It would be like, yeah, if my parents just be like, what's this?
	Who's this?
	And they'd be like, we too love Rod Watkins.
	And you'd be like, no!
	You secretly find out that people are pilled.
	That's the ultimate payout.
	Maybe a Rod Watkins bumper sticker is like the glasses that they live and then it just sort of awakens you to the horror of how many people around you are just like cretins.
	Yeah, I mean, right now it's the Gatstone flag and Let's Go Brandon.
	Oh, I swear, like, daily I have somebody at the casino with, like, a Let's Go Brandon shirt or hat somewhere.
	It's just, like, one person just shambles in and just has to let people know, I don't like Joe Biden in a tongue-in-cheek way!
	Ha ha!
	You suppose somewhere in our country there's like a liberal family that happen to live in like the Midwest or whatever and their son Brandon was like very into like school sports and they were frequently they're just cheering him on with like big banners and stuff and then all of a sudden they have to put all their fun shit away because conservatives have ruined it for them.
	They're like, let's go Brandon!
	And you're just like, no, we mean our son.
	And they're just like, yeah, we don't like colored people either.
	It's like, no, shut up!
	Let's go, Brandon.
	Thanks.
	We didn't want to bring our clan banner to this high school football game.
	Right.
	Yeah.
	So I'm checking the Ron Watkins Chronicles page.
	The last thing he posted was five days ago on July 15th and it's just a shot of like some nightmare section of Arizona at like at like dusk and the sky is just red and there's clouds everywhere and it just looks like it basically looks like the start of every post-apocalyptic nightmare movie you've ever seen.
	And Ron's just like, here's where I'm campaigning, on the literal surface of Mars.
	It's just, like... Well, hey, Ron.
	I hope that a lot of Martians are voting for you.
	I was doing all of his campaigning in a green screen, like, in front of his computer.
	He hasn't even left his house.
	He's like, here's me shaking hands with the wonderful people of, uh, I don't know, California?
	It's just him, like, shaking his, like, Rei Ayanami doll's hand.
	But she's, like, wearing a glove, but still pretty obvious.
	I forgot he was hiding in the desert.
	I forgot, like, when last we checked in on our noble hero, he was off hiding in the desert, we think, maybe.
	That's the thing, is that literally there's two theories on where Ron is.
	Either he's hiding in the desert, or, like, literally all that shit was, like, stuff that he did earlier, and he has fled the country in order to avoid the subpoena from the 1-6 committee.
	So...
	He's either back in Japan and pretending to be campaigning or he's campaigning but aggressively off the grid so that the person who's been sent to Arizona to physically hand him the subpoena for the 1-6 committee can't find him.
	Either way, it's really hard to win a campaign for elected office when the fundamental principle of what you're doing is avoid a subpoena, stay off the grid.
	Yeah, and like, if you're elected, if he gets elected, or even wins the primary, he's gonna have to come out of his hole, and then they're gonna get you.
	Because if you're doing this much to avoid testifying, like, we'd like to have a word please, thank you very much.
	And then if you get elected, guess what?
	Then you extra get to testify and probably get arrested.
	I don't know.
	I just love the idea of him accidentally winning the Republican nomination and literally having to campaign from Japan the entire time because he just doesn't want to be in America.
	It would be so great.
	Did anybody have eyes on Rod Watkins the other day when the Hoover Dam started exploding?
	Oh, that's a good one.
	Does anybody have eyes on Rod?
	Idiot and terrorist.
	Do we know anything more about that?
	There was an explosion at the Hoover Dam.
	Oh, I'm sure QAnon knows what's up.
	It was dealt with, right?
	Oh, yeah.
	So, like, the official story is just that... You want to talk about a wave coming?
	Here we go.
	Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	It starts with Rod Watkins blowing up the Hoover Dam.
	Yes.
	So the official story, like the lying government would tell you about, is it was a transformer fire and that it didn't have any impact on the power.
	or the ability of the Hoover Dam to deliver power to its constituents.
	But QAnon knows better because they started doing the decodes because obviously they did.
	Oh, right.
	One thing that happened recently was the fake Q on Truth Social who's like...
	Is he still posting?
	Yeah, he's still posting.
	He's just living his best life.
	Again, when RealQ came back on 8Q and TruthSocialQ was like, you know what?
	Fuck it.
	I can just go hog here because I can just hide behind the screen of, hey, RealQ's posting over there.
	What I'm posting ain't anything.
	SexyDaddyQ came back and literally A little baby Q. Yeah, fake pretend baby Q daddy got to just live his best life of being a giant dum-dum.
	And so Q did this thing, Truth Social Q did this thing where he posted a queen from a deck of poker cards because it has a Q on it, obviously.
	And this got QAnon, again, all in a tizzy because anything from anyone makes them all like hot and bothered.
	And basically there was the version of the Queen that was regular and then there was the version of the Queen that had a way that was winking and someone made this like weird like graphic of the differences between the two faces and it was like this odd looking image and Someone was like, hey, Q, like, what does this all mean?
	And Truth Social Q replied about how it was a turtle eye, which is the term he used to describe it.
	And after he said that, QAnon followers started looking into the word turtle in Trump's old tweets and they found a misspelling
	of the word turtle and they found the word uh damn where Trump was yelling about
	releasing the damn vaccines but he spelled it as in an actual damn not as in like the condemnation
	from God of damning someone.
	I see.
	And they were like oh shit uh Truth Social Q talked about turtles right before the Hoover Dam exploded.
	And if you find this tweet from Trump in 2018, turtle and dam are in it.
	So obviously, Truth Social Q was like pointing out the Hoover Dam was going to be attacked days before it happened.
	Clearly.
	Yeah, and that's just the way it is.
	It was definitely attack and not like outdated equipment overstressed.
	Everybody knows how updated Hoover Dam's equipment is.
	Famously, yeah.
	When I think of Hoover Dam, I'm just like, man, state of the art.
	Yeah.
	Yep.
	So yeah, basically, I mean, this is the kind of unbelievably aggressive straw grasping that these people do.
	And then when you look at them and you're like, bro, you're out of your fucking mind.
	What are you talking about?
	They just get, I can't believe you don't see it.
	Why will you normies not wake up when it's all right in front of you?
	It's just the... It's a good question, Mike.
	Why won't you wake up when the truth is right in front of you?
	That's right, I've been pilled.
	The Hoover Dam is what did it.
	It's also obvious to me now.
	Yeah, we were talking before and Al was just like, I'm so fucking pilled, don't tell Mike.
	Guys, I'm secretly super-pilled.
	I had to tell somebody, I'm so excited.
	What a twist!
	Which is going to make the next segment so much more exciting for me now that I'm fully-pilled.
	Because it's time for us to get into our glorious headlines for the week.
	Mike, hit that glorious headlight bump.
	From the digital headlines to the digital front lines, it's Q's in the News.
	Doing my finger gun.
	Pew, pew, pew, it's the news.
	Baa, baa, baa.
	Baa, baa.
	Airhorn.
	Okay, so airhorn-worthy news headline of the week, top of the pops, it is Bannon.
	He's finally on trial, I guess.
	Is it an actual trial?
	I haven't been keeping up with this at all.
	Yeah, it's a big boy trial.
	And his 87th time trying to get a pushback did not work.
	And our listeners week to week will just be like, but Al, haven't you already talked about this once or twice on the podcast?
	And I'd be like, yeah.
	And that would be the end of that.
	And much like you two, they would wait for more and they would not get it.
	So Mike, for me, the listener, and me again, I guess, what's going on in the Bannon trial now that it's finally kicked off?
	Okay.
	So basically what happened was, uh, after all kinds of flailing and grasping at straws and desperate attempts to delay this thing, uh, Bannon's trial, uh, jury selection began.
	And then the jury was, they obtained the jury.
	And then after the jury was obtained, Bannon's lawyers then requested a month long delay because of the whole fact that the judge told them all the, all those defenses you were going to use, you can't fucking use them because you'd just be lying to the jury.
	And we don't allow that.
	And so after they asked for a month delay, the judge was like, no, you're not getting a month delay.
	And then his lawyers were like, how about three to five days?
	And then from what I read, basically the judge was like, I'll consider it.
	And then literally the next report I saw was the trial has started.
	The first witness has been called.
	Opening statements have been given.
	The first witness is going to be called.
	So it was just like, I guess the judge really didn't consider it that hard because, uh, yeah, he was like, nope, you're done.
	We're, we're just going right to this.
	And.
	The prosecution's case is literally he fucking did it and the defense I Again, because this is one of those this is in a federal court So there's no live cameras and you're having people like basically running out of the courtroom and giving you reporting back Yeah reporting back.
	Oh Yeah, yeah, so like basically What they said was Uh, after a restart, so I don't know what, like, shit Bannon's attorneys tried that, like, the judge, like, slapped them down for, but after a restart, basically, they're just going straight for jury nullification because they have no other case.
	Like, Bannon's lawyers were like, look, this committee got impenaled, but a lot of Republicans voted against this committee, so is this committee really legitimate?
	And it's like, come on, bro, like, what are we even doing here?
	So, like, I had previously stated that the prosecution was going to call one witness to testify.
	I was wrong.
	They are going to call two.
	And basically, the first witness is just going to explain how the committee was formed and that they subpoenaed Bannon.
	And the second witness is just there to say, yeah, Bannon got the subpoena.
	And this is what we did.
	And this is how he reacted to it.
	And that's that.
	And they might, they might... By no case of this injury.
	Yeah, they might call a third witness so like that might be so uh this the the prosecution I they're probably going to be done with their case today or tomorrow and then it will be up to Bannon's lawyers to throw shit at a wall for as long as they can Because, again, like, he wanted to call Pelosi to testify, the judge told him to fuck off, like, and the thing that's, like, really funny is that basically every time they leave the courtroom, Bannon just gets in front of a microphone and is just like, this bullshit sucks and I'm gonna tear this whole thing down and I'm being persecuted and this is all a bunch of horse hockey and I'm, I'm gonna, I'm gonna drag him through the mud like you read about and then he gets in the court and he's just quiet.
	Like, they said that, like, Bannon's just sitting in his chair.
	He's not taking notes.
	He's, like, rocking back and forth.
	Rarely he talks to his lawyers.
	But, I mean, because, like, they all know.
	They all know he's wrong.
	He's pulling the Alex Jones.
	He's just, like, super bombastic.
	And then when he's actually, factually confronted, he's like, oh, uh, I never thought there'd be consequences for my actions.
	Yeah, he's just sitting there in the court just eating shit because there's really nothing he can do except just listen to the one or two witnesses against him just be like, yeah, this guy broke the law.
	Because he's on trial for not appearing to a subpoena, right?
	And so the evidence is, did you give him the subpoena?
	Was he duly notified?
	And they're like, yes.
	Yeah, it's two counts.
	One for failing to appear and one for failing to provide documents.
	So those are the two counts that he's being charged with.
	It turns out, I think those are pretty easy to prove, one way or the other.
	Right, exactly.
	As every not-a-lawyer legal expert on Twitter has pointed out, the prosecutor in the opening statement should have been like, hey, everyone on this jury, did you think you had an option not to attend jury duty?
	I didn't think so.
	Guess what?
	When the state compels you to do something, you gotta fucking do it.
	That's what Bannon's here for.
	He thinks he's better than you.
	Fuck him.
	So yeah, I mean, it's just like that.
	That's it.
	I mean, this is the thing.
	Oh, and the other bit of good news that I found from somebody was they said, because I thought he could potentially get probation or something for this shit.
	Each count carries a minimum of a month in jail.
	So he's looking at two months to two years after he's convicted.
	So Enjoy time in jail, asshole.
	That's basically it.
	I mean, that would be amazing if one of these chungos actually saw some jail time.
	Right.
	I mean, but, like, who cares if he ends up spending, like, nine months in club fed or whatever?
	Yeah, I mean, if he's actually convicted of a felony and does some jail time, I guess that's something, but you're not wrong.
	But the problem is that even if it's like, yeah, send a message that it's not okay or whatever, it's only a message of people pay attention and care.
	I don't think the general public is doing either of those things.
	I feel like most people at this point are like, Steve who?
	No, it's just the sickos over here like, yeah, he's actually doing jail time and you're not wrong.
	Everyone else is like, yeah, okay, so what?
	It's like, there are so many players at this stuff that it's like, are only really gets if you are like, if you have your finger on the pulse of it, then I'm sure, like, your average American just, like, they don't know who that person is or care.
	They're just like, who?
	What?
	I think more people know who Steve Bannon is, unfortunately, than, like, say, Dinesh D'Souza, but... Sure, but I think the number's also still not, like, dramatically high, right?
	Yeah, we're in a weird bubble.
	He seems like he'd be pretty far down on the list of Trump cronies the average person would know about.
	Yeah, I think about that every now and again.
	I'm like, how much of this stuff that I'm like, well, everyone knows about that, and like, how much do people actually, everybody know about it?
	Or am I just on an anti-QAnon podcast every week?
	But then again, what do you think the over-under is on people knowing if you were just like, hey, do you know who the president was like, you know, three years ago?
	And they go, it was Donald Trump, of course.
	You're just like, all right, cool.
	Do you know who the vice president was under Donald Trump three years ago?
	What do you think the over-under is on people knowing the answer to that question?
	I think it's surprisingly low.
	Mike Pence was the vice president?
	Yeah, just literally name a Mike Pence, this was three years ago.
	Tell me who Trump's vice president was.
	I'm not sure that the amount of people you would want would know the answer to that.
	I'm gonna put it at like 65%.
	I'm thinking that that's probably where he'd rate.
	I mean, I just think- Honestly, if this was that Drew Carey game show and 65% was the number that was proposed to be, I would probably under that one.
	Hmm.
	I don't know.
	Uh, hmm.
	I, like, you're making me really think about it, and... For the most part, I'm just saying that, like, I want all of these fucks to see Jail Time.
	I just don't think it's gonna be like a... That's more like, I genuinely think they should be paying for their crimes, and less that I think it's really gonna move the needle on anything.
	I mean, I guess the best you can hope for is that if Steve Bannon sees Jail Time, it turns up the heat, if only slightly, on people that he may have been, like, palling around with, that are higher up on the ladder, that might just be like, oh man, maybe they're coming for me next.
	Yeah, I wish it was a more serious charge so we could get Bannon.
	There was a better chance that Bannon would flip and, like, name some names.
	Oh yeah, it would be great.
	But the other thing is, Bannon's like a true believer.
	He's like a total nut who wants a fascist government.
	So I don't know what it would take to, like, kind of break him from that worldview and to put him into, like, save-my-own-ass mode.
	The only thing I would say, like, to Elle's point about, like, who is Steve Bannon, is that, at the very least, like, political wonks and people who know this politics stuff, they would know who Bannon is, and they would understand that, whereas, like, in the QAnon world, like, your prosecutions, like the Durham investigation, he's gonna bring the whole house of cards down, like, For all the people who don't know who Steve Bannon is, Jesus fucking Christ, does nobody know who Michael Sussman is, or who Igor Danchenko is, and I probably got the last name wrong on how to say that, but it's like, the people that Durham is going after that's got QAnon all hot and bothered, oh my god, like, you could never in a million years, no one could name these people.
	Like, Bannon might have, like, 5, maybe 10% name recognition in America, but Michael Sussman, oh my, if that guy was at 1%.
	Imagine if anyone from the liberal side of things, of roughly equivalent renown and influence as Steve Bannon, even got served as a PETA.
	For the QAnon squad, imagine how badly they'd be spiking that football.
	Oh, the subpoena!
	It's happening!
	Oh my god!
	Some like D-list player got a subpoena!
	Whoa!
	Oh yeah, they were freaking out that Robbie Mook testified at the Sussman trial.
	That was their win, that that guy came in as a witness, because he ran Hillary's campaign in 2016.
	They were like, oh shit, this guy had to testify!
	Was he charged?
	Did anything happen to him?
	No, but he testified!
	It's like, oh my god.
	A little, really.
	Yeah.
	It's like, oh my god, like really?
	That's your idea of victory?
	Is like a guy giving testimony to somebody else's case where that nobody got acquitted?
	That's your idea of a win?
	Holy shit.
	Yeah, bar so low it's on the floor.
	Yes.
	I'm sure if you confronted them about their goalposts changing, they would just be like, no way man, goal's always been the same as it always was.
	And it's just like, great, what a self-owned, this is always what you've been waiting for?
	Tiny little victories like this?
	Like yeah, some mid-level idiot testified at this even lower level idiot's trial for doing a thing, oh my god.
	And again, that even lower limit was acquitted almost immediately.
	The jury ordered lunch, then came back with an acquittal.
	It wasn't even a tough case to kick out of court.
	The jury laughed at it.
	And that's their win.
	That was what they were so amped up about for years.
	This is so wild.
	Well, okay, I guess we will certainly keep this here ban in trial on our radar and talk about it further if anything comes of it, up to it, including this joker going to prison, where we will spike the football and we will deserve to.
	Yeah.
	Oh yeah, I mean, next week we'll probably be talking about his conviction, because again, the prosecution's case is going to end today or tomorrow, and I mean, what the fuck is Bannon going to put up for a defense?
	Who's going to go on the stand to defend Steve Bannon from a crime he committed?
	Is he going to testify?
	That would be hilarious if Bannon got on the stand.
	Steve Bannon's going to turn into the shitbag A-team.
	been and convicted of a crime he totally committed. Yes.
	Yeah. So again, unless they got a few jurors on the, on the, on the jury that are totally pilled, uh,
	yeah, we'll probably be talking about how Steve Vance totally fucked next week and that'll
	be great. Wow. Mike that, that it sounds like what you're describing there is a speedy
	trial.
	Speaking of speedy trials, a judge recently just ordered that Elon Musk v. Twitter must be started speedily in October versus not speedily, February, when Elon Musk and his people wanted it to happen.
	Mike, explain further what's going on in the ongoing legal turmoil between Sometimes cue a non-hero, sometimes cue a non-devil Elon Musk.
	He can be your angle or your devil.
	Yes!
	So our boy Elon, his lawyers, what's so funny about all of this is that QAnon's always talking about, oh, Discovery's going to bring the house down.
	Twitter's so scared of this lawsuit.
	They don't want the smoke from Elon.
	They don't want our base daddy to come at them.
	And Twitter's like, we want to go to trial now.
	We want to go to trial yesterday.
	Immediately.
	Get this thing going now.
	And Elon's the one going, hey, slow your roll, slow your roll.
	Sim it down.
	We need to take our time about this.
	And as Elle stated, I, although I think Elon actually wanted to go all the way out to April of 2023 for this.
	So like, like Elon was trying to push us back a mile and Twitter was trying to get this to start in September.
	And from everything that I read from any legal scholar who isn't hosting a QAnon podcast, the gist of it was that Twitter has the case, and their case is very simply, Elon agreed to buy our company, and now he's refusing to do so.
	And one of Twitter's lawyers said, Elon refuses to take yes for an answer.
	Like, we literally We made this deal with Elon, and we've signed the documents, and now Elon's like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
	Just because I said I was buying Twitter, it didn't mean I was buying Twitter.
	I mean, holy shit, guys, calm down, calm down.
	And Twitter's just like, he's doing harm to us, all the shit he's posting on our platform and everything he's saying in the media damages us.
	He's acting in a malicious way against our company, and we need resolution to this ASAP, and We would prefer that resolution to be, he owns Twitter now, because we want that sweet, sweet $44 billion!
	It's yours now, no tixi-baxis!
	Right, you own this thing, and we get our pile of money.
	We, as the kids would say, get the bag.
	So... I love how Elon's big complaint is, he's just like, again, we've talked about this on the pod before, but he's just like, hey, Like, they underrepresented the amount of fake accounts they have.
	And Twitter's just like, A, we've always said that it's probably higher than what we anticipated.
	B, that's immaterial to you purchasing the company.
	You waived your due diligence, idiot.
	Like, you were just like, hey, I'll just buy it, site unseen, let's do this.
	And then you saw it with your site, and it was just like, well, wait a minute.
	No, I don't, like, you know...
	Sign on C. That's just like an expression, right?
	It's a go.
	It literally means you did not look at it and now you own it.
	Congratulations.
	Dumb dumb.
	Right.
	Welcome to the housing market, asshole.
	You gotta pay $30,000 over asking with no inspection.
	That's how you own a social media platform these days.
	They're a tough commodity to just get easy.
	An established one, no less.
	Right.
	Also, you're rich and powerful, and you've got cash, and women are falling all over you, and you have, like, nine kids or whatever, so, like, certainly you could just absorb this hit.
	Just go ahead and buy a Twitter.
	You said you were gonna do it.
	Just do it.
	Just do it.
	And while you're at it, give me one million United States dollars.
	100 million.
	He's a billionaire.
	See, I'm not even trying to milk him!
	I just want what's fair!
	One million United States dollars from me for nothing!
	I guess technically I'm in the process of blackmailing him by saying I'll stop talking about his deformed penis.
	And listeners, yeah, we saw the gross pictures of Elon and him getting hosed down.
	We decided not to really talk about it.
	Yeah, I wanted to prove to Elon how serious I was about my offer to stop talking about his deformed penis because we had a little discussion prior to the recording of the show as to whether or not we were even going to talk about those gross photos of him that came out.
	And we decided no, because there was no news to them other than the fact that he does not look good, which we already know.
	Yes.
	As we also mentioned, if we want those photos, we have the old pre-hairplug Elon photos to look at.
	Simply busting on Elon Musk for not looking good, that's not a win for anybody.
	It's punching down because it's obvious, low-hanging fruit, all that dumb shit.
	But the penis thing is different.
	He is the one who opened the Pandora's box if somebody should be able to ID his penis immediately from a brief.
	unwanted exposure, also known as a crime.
	Also known as a criminal move.
	But...
	Yes, you, anyone who has even seen my penis for a second should be able to give an incredibly accurate
	anatomical description of said penis because it is horrifying.
	It is the Medusa of penises.
	Like, when I was impregnating Grimes, she had to wear sunglasses in order to avoid being turned to stone during the procreation process, because my penis is just that foul.
	So, yes.
	Or maybe it's just like, maybe it's cool but in a way no one would believe.
	So no one would try to describe it.
	I think it was like, clockwork mechanical?
	Like that bad guy in Hellboy?
	Did you ever see that movie?
	I think it looked like that.
	I don't get it.
	It had gears and stuff.
	It looked like you had to wind it up, but it seemed like it would work just fine if you did.
	I don't understand it.
	It's very bizarre.
	Sounds right.
	I'm now imagining the Golden Army as Elon's phallus, and that is incredible.
	Grimes gets mad at him, shatters his penis and slowly reforms.
	The cogs and gears all start reattaching themselves magically.
	It's just really interesting.
	Was it Guillermo del Toro who has designed Elon Musk's speed?
	Yes!
	He has it in a note.
	Someone showed him the shape of water dildo and Guillermo del Toro responded, well that's not what it looks like.
	Meaning he definitely has drawings of that fish penis.
	He's a master of his craft.
	Anyway, so this is definitively a win for Twitter.
	Do we know why exactly?
	I know that they need to get it done quickly for a reason, but I haven't delved too deeply into the story.
	Yeah, I mean you gotta you gotta get on it fast so that they can, you know, not not also it behooves them so he can't just drag it out and build this like ridiculous defense that no one will buy, but you know.
	I mean I suppose but like I could have sworn I mean this is this is what I get for bringing it up when I don't have it because of course I don't why would I but I could have sworn that there was another more concrete reason why they wanted to get it done like there was some sort of like like like a filing clock or something that they were on where they needed to get it done before then.
	Oh on that on that subject it's like basically like when the deal has to be closed by and they don't want Elon to run the clock out on that and then be like well the deal wasn't finalized so now I don't know and I don't know it like boom like yeah that like that now I remember that that was the like the other big payoff was that Basically, they're accusing Elon of trying to stall this litigation out to beyond where the contract was supposed to be finalized.
	And then Elon was just like, oh, guess we couldn't finalize the contract.
	Guess it's invalid now.
	Guess I don't owe you any money.
	Waka waka.
	And Elon just slinks away.
	He runs off where he leaves behind a cartoon outline of smoke from where he previously was.
	And then he gets onto his poorly designed submarine to try to save children that wouldn't work and then calls you a pedophile if you get mad about that submarine.
	Silhouette of Smoke looks like it was drawn by Rob Liefeld.
	OK, well, thankfully, I guess that means that we get to stop talking about Elon Musk and or his deformed peen for the time being.
	But of course, this story is going to be ongoing, so we'll have to revisit it as more developments unfold.
	But it was segments like that that showed that we are not journalists.
	We are a comedy news show, and both comedy and news are in quotation marks.
	So let's move on to our next bit of comedy headline news, which is the say that some QAnon nutbar has apparently ascended to office in Maryland, I believe, or is ascending to office in Maryland.
	Anyway, his name is Cox, which is funny.
	So let's talk about Cox.
	I was stunned that we didn't segue from Elon Pean to Cox in a smoother, more It all felt so natural.
	Yes.
	So basically in Maryland, you have this guy, Larry Hogan, who is in a lot of ways like their version of Charlie Baker, the governor of my commonwealth, where they're just this boring, milquetoast Republican And they kind of govern as a Democrat, but because they got that R next to their name, and they're kind of liberal, everyone likes them, because they are a popular Republican, and that's a good thing.
	So, Hogan was like, hey, you know, I'm term-limited, I'm going to dip out, and I would like this boring milk toast.
	Other Republican that fits this mold to replace me.
	And the Republican primary voters looked at the options and said, no, fuck you.
	We're going to vote for Dan Cox, who is an election denying lunatic who has spoken at a QAnon rally.
	So this guy is... And the thing about this is, There was a, uh, there was a poll, um, a little while before this, and... Oh, a poll and a Cox?
	Slow down there, champ!
	Yes!
	Yeah, I know, we're working really blue here, holy shit.
	But, um...
	This, um, this campaign, this guy, the poll came out and it was saying that, like, uh, Cox is up eight points over, uh, Hogan's... Yeah, I bet it is!
	Oh, hell yeah!
	Yeah.
	And people were like, oh, this is bullshit.
	It was a, it was a poll, like, that was, it's not reputable.
	Um, and I'm also, uh, One of my favorite things that just drives me up a wall here is that so many people talk about, oh, those Democrats, they're just trying to prop up the most extreme candidates because they think they'll be easier to beat in the general election, but they're playing with fire because if these lunatics win the general, then you have a nut winning the election.
	So this is the Democrats' fault.
	People were claiming the Democrats were promoting that poll about Cox being up 8 points.
	And it turned out he's won by 17 points.
	So he won in an even bigger, more impressive landslide than the polling showed.
	And Cox was also endorsed by Donald Trump.
	Super!
	Trump loves Cox, confirmed.
	When I think Trump, I think Cox.
	Or is it when I think Cox, I think Trump?
	Right, exactly.
	In October of 2020, so right before the presidential election, Dan Cox tweeted out, Biden is dark and oppressed.
	Will lock us in our homes.
	President Trump is upbeat and hopeful.
	I will defend the Constitution, the White House, and our President at real Donald Trump.
	From all threats, foreign and domestic.
	Will you?
	Hashtag Dark Winter.
	Hashtag Tom Clancy.
	Hashtag The Division.
	Hashtag USA.
	Hashtag where we go one, we go all.
	The Division?
	Is he fucking sponsored?
	Like... Yeah, I know!
	Hashtag Ubisoft.
	Man, yeah.
	Someone let Ubisoft know, because holy shit.
	They know what they're doing.
	They make video games based off of Tom Clancy novels.
	You think there's a lot of fucking college-educated liberals out there reading Tom Clancy just on their off time?
	Probably not.
	That series has to be just like, hoorah, American military porn, right?
	And then he snuck into the Russian compound and he killed like 40 guys by himself, fair handed.
	It was crazy.
	You don't even know.
	He saw the snake.
	Oh my God.
	Someone replied to this post and says, this seems unhinged.
	Are you, sir?
	And Dan replied, no, I'm not an anti-Trump free speech absolutionist Tianan like you, if that's your question.
	I have no idea what he thinks Tianan is, which is like super bizarre.
	Wait, free speech absolutionist or abolitionist?
	Absolutionist, TNR.
	What the fuck does that mean?
	I have no idea.
	I'm super confused.
	If you were a free speech absolutist or whatever, wouldn't that mean that you, wouldn't that put you in Elon Musk's camp?
	Yeah, just free speech above all things.
	Where you're just like, I'm gonna buy Twitter so that people can say the n-word on Twitter because the Constitution says that you can say the n-word.
	Or whatever.
	You know what I mean?
	Or he's just like, you know, I feel like Twitter should be used as a platform to dismiss the identity of trans people because that's what the Constitution totally, that's what they were accounting for when they made the free speech laws.
	I'm Elon Musk, I come from a long line of oppressing black people and I want everyone to have that opportunity.
	That's what they had in mind with their free speech when they also were writing it.
	They were just like, you know, in the future, I bet that it's going to be pretty easy to get like a semi-automatic rifle that could kill like dozens if not hundreds of people in a pretty short span.
	So we should make sure that we write it here that everybody can have whatever guns they want at all times.
	Yeah.
	Oh sorry, but that wasn't when the document was originally made up.
	That came later.
	That was in a minute.
	That was a little bit later.
	They were like, oh jeez, this thing was so fundamental we forgot it.
	Oops.
	Whoops.
	No, it was in the original 10.
	The first 10 were right there when they made it, so yeah.
	It was baked into the pie from the jump, so yeah.
	Freedom in America, forever, always.
	Although now, we're doing this thing where, yeah, it was, hey, the word abortion isn't in the Constitution, so abortions are illegal.
	But, like, ARMS was, so ARMS means AR-15, so I can somehow straddle both sides of that, and it'll be totally okay, so.
	That all makes sense?
	Everything?
	Oh, God, absolutely all makes sense.
	100%.
	100% makes it all make sense.
	You know what makes America America?
	Goods and free speech.
	Yes, yeah, yeah.
	Oh yeah, there's a bill working its way through North Carolina right now where you are allowed to kill in defense of a fetus.
	Their Democrat governor will veto it, but basically the bill just says you're allowed to shoot an abortion doctor and if you just say, hey, I was trying to save a fetus's life.
	Seems good.
	According to the bill, totally okay.
	Just a little warning for you.
	A little light there.
	We got Mastroni in Pennsylvania who's 100% QAnon.
	We got this guy in Maryland who's not going to win.
	Maryland and these, we have these blue states that just do the governor, Republican governor
	thing.
	It's a weird like tick of the state.
	Like here in Massachusetts, no Democrat worth piss would ever run to be the governor of
	Massachusetts because we have like just not, we don't even have super majorities in the
	We have omni majorities.
	There's like maybe a dozen Republicans between the House and the Senate.
	It's like ridiculous.
	So if you're the governor, you're just the bitch of the state Congress.
	Like they just literally say, hey, here's the bill for you to sign, sign it.
	And if you don't sign it, they'll override your veto because they control everything.
	Like, in Massachusetts, we don't have our governors go to jail for corruption.
	We had three straight Speakers of the House go to jail for corruption, because that's who you were bribing to get shit done in this state.
	So it's just like one of these things where, hey, yeah, we'll have a Republican governor, whatever, you gotta have someone watching the henhouse so the liberals don't go too crazy.
	But Maryland's not going to vote for this QAnon guy.
	So, smash cut to this November.
	Cox, Governor of Maryland!
	Who knew?
	But no, that's never going to happen.
	This guy's going to get crushed.
	So, good job Republican primary voters.
	Thank you for picking an absolute lunatic who will crash and burn spectacularly in the general election.
	I hope this happens more and more to the Republican Party as they just further, like, just tie themselves to QAnon and its madness and hopefully just make themselves more and more unelectable to the general public.
	Yeah, I for one salute their desire to ram through Cox.
	Yeah?
	Get it?
	It sounds like penis.
	Speaking of things that sound like genitals, let's get to our big bag.
	Our big male bag.
	Oh right, yes, that.
	That was what you were talking about.
	Our listeners got questions, we got answers.
	It's time for Q and A. The nice big bag to go with our Cox coverage.
	After we were talking about Elon Musk's clockwork phallus, so yeah.
	Elon Musk's clockwork phallus!
	Well, welcome to the three children podcast.
	That's never getting made.
	Elon Musk's clockwork fellas.
	Oh, I thought you were going to say the three children podcast.
	Oh, man.
	It's just called three kids.
	Anyway.
	Let's solve our listeners' birding questions.
	Let's fix what's birding our sack.
	Yes.
	So, BirderKing, which is a reference to another Trump misspelling which has been decoded by so many people.
	BirderKing asks, has NewQ flamed out since Watkins got busted so quickly and handily?
	I, the thing about Jim Watkins it really feels like to me is that he's the kind of guy that would just like tweet through it if he thought he could.
	He doesn't feel like a man who has a lot of shame or the ability to like really care about like literally having the curtain pulled out from in front of him and being exposed as a Wizard of Oz.
	So he, um, I don't think he's stopping for that reason.
	I don't know why Jim stopped.
	I mean, I think maybe the only thing that might have hurt him was the fact that he got so much actual, in-his-face, visceral backlash on 8kun itself.
	Because, like, QAnon proper on all the social medias was just like, hey, everything's going great!
	Q's posting!
	Daddy's home!
	Life's good!
	We're living the dream!
	It's all rainbows and unicorns!
	But like, on actual 8kun, like literally everyone was like, oh my god, Jim's Q, that dum-dum!
	Oh, he gave away the game!
	Oh, Jim, you stupid moron!
	You must feel so stupid for exposing yourself as Q!
	You idiot!
	So, like, I kind of feel like that might have been what, like, made Jim go, oh god, I can't do this anymore!
	Because he just got it, like, shoved in his face so hard that he posted his Q.
	Because the thing is, I mean, maybe he could go to the secret message board that they set up exclusively for Q to post on that I don't think Q ever used.
	If he posts in the wild, the way that QDrops usually got posted, I feel like it would be one of those things where immediately the whole thread was just people dunking on Jim again.
	And I just think he doesn't want to do that.
	He just doesn't want to go through the shit of like, Commenting on the 1-6 hearings and then getting, like, dunked on by everybody on the forums, just, like, mocking him.
	So, I, uh, so, uh, congratulations, 8kuntrolls.
	Uh, you've killed Q. And for that, that's the only good service you've ever done for the world, ever.
	Yeah, yeah, you killed this thing you created.
	What a hero.
	Celebrate your glory.
	It's like Avengers Age of Ultron all over again.
	I was just thinking about that the other day.
	It's like, man, everyone's just like, hey Tony, don't make the big evil robot.
	And Tony's like, fuck it.
	I'm making a big evil robot.
	He's like, dude, I do what I want.
	I'm fucking Iron Man, bitch.
	What are you talking about?
	Oh, no!
	I made a robot that wants to end the world!
	Who could have foreseen this?
	Uh, literally all of us, Tony.
	Literally all of us.
	We all told you not to do that.
	Yeah, but, well, I mean, they should have known what they were getting because of his famous catchphrase, I'm fucking Iron Man, bitch.
	I mean, I believe, remember when Thanos sent a couple of members of the Black Order down to attack New York and he like dramatically walked up to them and he hit the button on his chest and like the suit started to nano-materialize all over him and he was like, I'm fucking Iron Man, bitch!
	Oh, he said it!
	He said the lie!
	Played licensed music.
	Thanos is like, I am inevitable.
	It goes to snap and then it cuts.
	to Tony Stark revealed to have secretly stolen all of the infinity gems and he goes
	a fucking Iron Man bitch uh this is our this is our rated r cut of all the MCU
	movies Everything is identical except Tony Stark as Iron Man is constantly just saying a fucking Iron Man bitch.
	Tony Stark just basically just gets drop-dropping F-bombs.
	It becomes a massive character trait.
	Yeah, there's just like there's all sorts of ADR lines for it too,
	just like apropos of nothing when other people are doing stuff around the Avengers Mansion.
	It's just and then and then it's all just like, Hulk, have you seen the size of my penis?
	And it's like, wow, this is, oh god.
	The Iron Man one seems much better in comparison.
	Well, Iron Man was already making funny jokes about Hide the Zucchini.
	Remember all those funny jokes?
	If I recall, those were also in that wonderful movie, Age of Ultron, that everybody loves.
	Yep.
	Where they introduce and kill Quicksilver.
	So good.
	Then we got Boner.
	I'm here and now I'm dead.
	Oh, so sad.
	Then we got Boner though.
	Bet you didn't see that coming!
	Yeah, because it didn't make any fucking sense, mate.
	Why didn't you kill Hawkeye?
	He's useless.
	Anyway, enough about that.
	On to the next question.
	There.
	Cleodora Silvestri, messing, your, csv says, leaving politics aside this week to focus on an existential dilemma.
	Is the hot dog a sandwich of roll or a really soft-shelled taco?
	Oh, old as the hills.
	Yeah, I mean, this is an age-old debate.
	I'm of the mind that a hot dog is definitely a sandwich.
	Like, why wouldn't it be?
	It's just like, I don't think that disqualifies... It's also its own thing, but at some point when you start breaking shit down into categories, you come across little questions like this where you have to just be like, oh, Well, yeah.
	I mean, by the loosest definition of sandwich, it is something between some bread, yo.
	And then that is, you know, it's certainly what a hot dog is.
	Yeah, right.
	Assuming we mean hot dog, the total construction.
	Of course, an actual hot dog itself is not a sandwich.
	You know what I mean?
	Because hot dog is one of those weird things where like the meat you put in the middle of the total thing is also just called hot dog.
	Like you take a hot dog, what do you make with it?
	A hot dog.
	It's fucking weird.
	The English language is fucking extra bizarre, man.
	Yeah, it's like one of those things where it's like all squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares.
	So I mean, it's just, I would say that a hot dog, I do love the idea of calling it a really soft taco.
	That is hilarious to me.
	I think that is a stretch worthy of QAnon.
	That is a hot dog decode where you're just like, oh, but if you consider the bread of the bun to be like a soft-shelled taco, it's like, no, no.
	You're trying way too hard.
	Reach and make!
	But now we're getting into some other dumb food pedantry discussion, which I think is why people ask these sort of questions.
	Okay, a hot dog is a sandwich, we're all on board with that thinking.
	But, since we're talking about tacos, what makes a taco a taco?
	If a taco is simply any type of bread or bread-like material with a filling, then sure, a hot dog is a taco.
	But that doesn't feel right.
	Is what makes a taco a taco the shell, either crispy or soft?
	But a soft taco shell could also be used to fold up a burrito, even though it's not specifically made for that purpose.
	So it's sort of just like, what makes a taco a taco man?
	Who can say?
	Bro, think about it.
	When you think about it, we're all just food, right?
	We're all just dust in the wind.
	Oh man, food-ception.
	So interesting.
	Yeah.
	Nobody talks about how fucked up it is for people that aren't native English speakers that hot dog and hot dog are like two different things that are related but are like the exact same.
	Like they're not even like completely independent of one another.
	And then it's like we're just full of shit like this but hot dog is a good one that we could all get behind.
	Yo, yo, hand me one of those hot dogs.
	I'm gonna make a hot dog over here.
	I had never thought about that.
	Someone the other day on Twitter pointed out, like, batshit is going crazy, holy shit is an exclamation.
	We have all these different ways to use the word shit.
	Oh yeah, I've seen some comedians who had that bit.
	They dug into the shit in this situation.
	Well yeah, it's the same with the word fuck it, right?
	Or just fuck in general.
	It's just so versatile.
	We've taken it and we've really just worked it into It's sort of like our version of the word smurf to the point where you could like put it in the middle of other words for emphasis.
	Like you could say that something is like abso-fucking-lutely bananas and no one's just like looking at you weird like you used it wrong.
	Everyone just sort of goes with the flow.
	Just like, oh yeah, you can just stick fuck in the middle of other words.
	It's fine.
	Yeah.
	It's weird you should say that.
	actually, I've been inspired. I'm attempting to maybe make my own YouTube video and one of the
	first ones I'm scripting is the history of the Smurfs. And I've been reading early Smurfs and
	the original artist, Peyo, grew up in Nazi occupied Germany.
	So some of the early Smurfs ones are about like, the King Smurf comic is about the rise
	of Hitler to power.
	Like Peo has said, this is what I grew up with.
	I was a young Belgian boy in Nazi-occupied Belgium.
	I'm dropping some Smurf knowledge on you.
	And bringing the room down by talking about the Nazis occupying places.
	How dare you.
	How dare you bring down what is normally a light and fluffy podcast about QAnon.
	We literally sandwiched Light and Fluffy around the headlines in an effort to prevent this sort of thing, Sarge.
	What are you doing?
	What are you doing?
	At worst, you're talking about Nazis.
	At best, you're talking about Smurfs.
	The ceiling here is so low.
	Because who gives a smurfing smurf about the Smurfs?
	Am I right, guys?
	Yes!
	I just, I have a lot of Smurf knowledge that I wanted to share.
	Oh, God.
	Now, if we were talking about the Snorks, I'd be all in.
	Snorks isn't going to be my follow-up video.
	Yeah, because you want your second video to have more views than your first video.
	Hashtag Team Snork.
	The best part is there are people that are listening that might be like, I know what the Smurfs are, but what the fuck is a Snork?
	My follow-up video will just be Smurf ripoffs.
	Yeah, it'll be like, let me hit you with this one, Daddy-O.
	How about Smurfs, but underwater?
	Boobs, snorks.
	Yeah, with weird snorkels on their head, but they're fully underwater all the time.
	But their theme song was better, though.
	Don't get me wrong, I still remember the Smurfs theme song, but not because it's great.
	It's like the Cars for Kids theme song.
	You'll always remember it, but not for the reason you want.
	No.
	Man, that went off the rails.
	The question was about hot dogs, and we somehow got into Smurfs.
	Congratulations, Cleodora, for another excellent derailment question.
	We need to have a leaderboard for questions that aggressively derail us.
	Yeah.
	So Reverend Xenofact asks, okay, you've sold out and have been asked to create Frankenstein, the ultimate Q leader.
	What goes into it?
	Trump's hair?
	Flint's traitorous disloyalty?
	A Wagyu hat?
	Build us the ultimate Q god?
	This is more of a Serpentor situation where Cobra was going around and getting DNA from the the greatest quotation marks whatever's from around the world.
	Cosigned.
	This is like a Serpentor situation.
	That's a perfect way to put it.
	I would say I would go with Trump's callous disregard for human life.
	Rod Watkins' callous disregard for human life.
	Let's mix in Steve Bannon's reckless disregard for human life.
	Can we add a smorgasbord of Ron Watkins' sizzling charisma?
	Let's actually play around in the manner in which they intended.
	If you were going to take anybody's white-hot charisma, it would have to be Donald Trump's, right?
	That's what he's actually bringing to the field.
	Like the man or not.
	He does have a charm for the people he's speaking to.
	It's just, if you have a brain in your head, you're immune to it.
	But if you don't, whatever he's selling, people are clearly buying.
	So I'd say you would need Trump's charisma.
	You would certainly need QAnon's inside intelligence.
	Or Q himself.
	You would need actual Daddy's Q's big brain and his insider info.
	I guess you could take Kevin Sorbo's body, but from like 30 years ago, when he was like... Disappointed!
	But he was still a spry young Hercules.
	If he was a spry young Hercules, maybe he could pull off Rod Wackett's hat.
	Who played live action spry young Hercules?
	Do you know?
	Kevin Sorbo.
	Oh, no, there was a Young Hercules show.
	Oh, why would I know that?
	I never watched that show.
	I didn't even watch that terrible Sinbad show.
	Are you kidding me?
	Hercules and Zeta was as low as I was willing to limbo, even back in the mid-90s.
	Well, it was Ryan Gosling.
	Ryan Gosling played Young Hercules.
	Really?
	Yeah!
	No, I'm not giving them Gosling.
	They have to stick with Sorbo.
	They can have peak Sorbo, but they are not getting even pre-peak Gosling.
	They can't have him!
	They can't have my Ryan!
	Can we get Lucy Lawless to be, like, a hyper-leftist, like, alternative to Sorbo?
	Can, like, Xena just be, like, basically, like, Democratic Socialist, like, AOC 2024?
	I mean, can we just have... Well, when we get to putting together the perfect, uh, the perfect liberal counterpoint to our perfect Franken-Q, or Frank-Q-Stein, I think is what they put as a postcard.
	It's not a Q-ster.
	Or Serpentor, but we'll replace it with a Q as is our gimmick.
	Then we could use Lucy Lawless's just statuesque beauty and or willingness to get her tits out on camera because if you've seen Spartacus, you've seen a lot of Lucy Lawless's breasts.
	I've got other good news for you besides Lucy Lawless's willingness to get naked.
	That doesn't have to be some good news.
	She's an attractive woman.
	No, because Kevin Sorbo keeps posting dumb... Oh, Kevin Sorbo's dead!
	Well, that is great news!
	She's posted repeatedly.
	She's pretty left-leaning.
	Like, good news.
	She's already very on the left.
	She's owned Kevin Sorbo on Twitter more than once.
	I mean, honestly, I just assume that any celebrity that's worth a shit, unless they say otherwise, I just sort of assume they're left-leaning politically, because I feel like it would be hard to be in Hollywood or whatever and, like, make it to the top and still be like, yeah, but you know what?
	I don't think gay people deserve rights or whatever.
	Like, certainly some people do that.
	Tim Allen, I'm looking at you, like, what's the deal?
	Come on, bud, get with it.
	But, like... They wanted to cancel my show because of my political beliefs, and it's like, no, man, it's just not funny.
	And also, yeah, tough shit.
	Suck it up, buttercup, free market, etc.
	They get to decide who they have on their payroll.
	Fuck you.
	This is what you want, conservative goon.
	You want the market to bear itself out.
	Well, guess what?
	It bore yourself out of your fucking sitcom.
	This is the future conservatives want.
	Oh god, I saw some terrible meme that was talking about people flying a plane, and they're like, I don't know why the plane is gonna crash!
	I identify as a pilot!
	And it was like, this is the future liberals want.
	And it was from a Libertarian Twitter account, and it's like, Libertarian wants state-granted licenses.
	So, yeah.
	How do you like them apples?
	Hoisted under a batard, Libertarian!
	You giant dum-dum.
	Yeah, but maybe you weren't paying enough attention to that sick own about how that person identified as a pilot.
	Oh, right.
	They had no pilot training, but you know, it's like gender.
	You see what they're doing there?
	It's pretty subtle.
	Oh, so subtle.
	Ben, Ben Garrison, get in there with your magic marker and label everything up so Mike knows what the score is.
	Oh, thank you.
	I need Ben's light.
	The plane will just be labeled gender.
	It'll be like gender air.
	Exactly.
	Yeah.
	Gender.
	So we've got a body, a hat, and charisma.
	So I think we're pretty close to completing this.
	All of those, might I add, submitted by me.
	You guys, you wanted no part in this Frank U style.
	No, I brought in the serpent, the much more apt serpent, or... Oh, that's true.
	So I guess, Mike, you were the one who sucks.
	Yeah, I fully acknowledge this, yes.
	I love the idea that we have hate listeners and they have to listen to me ramble about the G.I.
	Joe movie and Smurfs and Serpentor.
	Because at any moment we could say something that proves that we like to suck a dreidachrome straight from an orphan's veins.
	Like the following statement, I love to drink a dreidachrome straight from orphan's veins.
	Exactly.
	We have a copy of the face carving video.
	It is in the Patreon behind the paywall.
	It's there.
	Go get it.
	You'll find it.
	We can't release it for free because if I'm going to give up my masturbation material, I need to get something back.
	No!
	I don't like it.
	I don't like it.
	I'm going to abuse my penis until it looks like Elon Musk's penis.
	Anyway, that's enough of that.
	No, I'm not going to let you interrupt me.
	We're leaving this discussion.
	I've turned it into something horrible and grotesque.
	Yeah, and this is your fault!
	I know!
	And I'm trying to redeem it by getting us the fuck out of here!
	Bye!
	Another question!
	Okay, uh...
	Patrick, who I'm now calling him that because my brain is weak and I've told him that's what's going to happen, says, in memory of Quad B, our listener who has passed away recently... I believe that was Big Bald Beautiful Bastard?
	Was that the sequence of words?
	Big Bad Bald Bastard, I believe, was it?
	Yes.
	It was something like that.
	It's hard to get all those B's together.
	It was some sick alliteration.
	Yes.
	So, in memory of his passing, which decade did you all enjoy the most?
	Mine was the 90s, so... Oh, I don't know.
	I don't remember any of the 80s.
	Like, I remember a little, but I was so young.
	I certainly grew up in the 90s, so I enjoyed them, but I mean, I don't know, hard to say.
	Probably the 2000s, just because, you know, it was more of a person.
	Yeah, I was gonna say, like, unfortunately, I liked the 90s well enough because, you know, I was a kid and it was pretty easy to just find enjoyment and stuff, but...
	If I have to go for a nice round decade I'd probably say the aughts because it was like getting out of high school and forming myself as a person like after high school up until my like mid-20s or whatever.
	My favorite span would probably be from like like if I had to if I could narrow it down to just like a 10-year span would probably be 2005 to 2015.
	Like, so much stuff happened in those years.
	A lot of it was bad, but, like, really formative.
	And a lot of it was great and, like, all-time legendary for, like, my life, like, stories and experiences I still refer back to to this day.
	So, if I could cheat and make it a span of 10 years, I'll go 2005 to 2015.
	Otherwise, scale everything back by five years to go through all of the aughts, if you want to round a decade.
	How about you, Mike?
	I kind of feel like what you said is kind of like how I would cheat as well, because I think my life kind of really changed for the most part from the mid-90s to the mid-2000s, because that was this sort of place where I was doing one thing, banging my head against the wall, just sort of drifting around, and then 2004 was basically when I got on the plane and flew to Las Vegas and became a poker dealer and just that was kind of like this massive change in my life and I've been in the gaming industry like since then I mean so it's been like over 17 years now that I've been like doing this kind of thing so that was like very much formative of that like that's when I got out of high school that's like all that kind of stuff that was going on I was like
	I was playing Magic the Gathering.
	I was just doing all that kind of stuff.
	And it's like, I have way more memories of that time than I kind of do, like, past that.
	But, like, I totally, like, acknowledge that, like, living in Vegas, all that kind of stuff, coming back to the East Coast, like, finding a job, like, all that kind of stuff was, like, good and positive for me.
	But, like, the memorable stuff was just, like, between that window.
	So, yeah.
	I would say, like, basically the years before I left for Vegas and then, like, going to Vegas.
	That was, like, peak Mike Rains, like, figuring out what's going on in his lifetime.
	So it seems like, for the most part, we all love the aughts.
	Go aughts!
	Yeah.
	Return of the millennium, baby.
	What a time to be alive.
	And we were!
	Yeah, Y2K, all that stuff.
	Oh, man.
	All right.
	Well, thanks for the question.
	That was a fun one.
	Yeah.
	And the final question, but unfortunately this was more of the thing that just was designed to melt my brain, was what are all your thoughts about this scam ad?
	And the ad is literally a deepfake involving Donald Trump, like with a fake C-SPAN caption at the bottom of the screen, speaking at a Faith and Freedom event.
	And it's an obvious deepfake.
	It's not really Trump.
	And it's an impersonator of Trump's voice.
	It's about as good as our impersonations of Trump are.
	So it's not bang on.
	But it's literally a QAnon promoter.
	named Phil Godlewski, which is just, man, what a Polish Scrabble name that is.
	But Phil posted this ad, and it's for people buying what's called a Trump Red Card.
	It's like the Trump Bucks from the start of our episode.
	And this deep fig is like, you need to buy this Trump Red Card, you get exclusive benefits, and the best part is, the more red cards you buy, the more benefits you get.
	And it's like, Wouldn't they just have, like, the red card going to a platinum card going to an exclusive card?
	Why would you buy ten Trump red cards to unlock the bonuses?
	Like, doesn't the card get you an account that you can then deposit money into?
	It's, like, such a weird scam.
	It's like, they're like collectible cards, except they're all the same.
	But the collectible value is in how many of them you have.
	Yeah.
	Uh yeah so and basically the guy was like wondering like who paid to get this ad done because Phil doesn't have the money for this so I mean I don't it's really hard it's like There's any number of anonymous shitheads who want to use Trump without his permission, much like the Trump bucks, to try to promote a scam.
	It's really funny how, like, Trump is both incredible grifter, but also, like, the weapon people use to commit other grifts that Trump obviously has no part of.
	So it's wild.
	Also, I don't think it's that expensive to do deepfakery now.
	I think there are open source tools that you can use to get it done with not a lot of knowledge in the practice of doing it.
	What it really boils down to as far as I know is having enough reference shots, which I'm
	sure getting those of Donald Trump can't be that difficult.
	Yeah, he does so much TV.
	He did so much TV.
	Yeah, and then time to train the deepfake to produce something that even looks like
	sort of like usable at all.
	So I'm not really convinced it would take a lot of money for anybody who is so inclined
	to do a deepfake of anything these days.
	I'm certainly no, like, you know, graphic design person.
	But, uh, I do watch The Corridor Crew, which pretty much makes me an expert in the field.
	I'm pretty great!
	So, yeah, I guess the real answer is unknown, though, right?
	Like, it could be any number of scam artists.
	But thankfully, they're using Donald Trump's face to grift losers that would be inclined to giving Donald Trump their money to begin with.
	So, I say, no harm, no foul.
	Play on.
	Yes.
	Yes, indeed.
	Yeah, so that brings us to the end of the mailbag, which brings us to the question, what are you guys looking forward to?
	I've been thinking about this.
	Oh, nope.
	The movie, nope.
	Jordan Peele's new movie comes out this weekend.
	I am very excited to see it.
	I don't like horror movies, but I like Jordan Peele movies, so here we are.
	Yeah, I am excited for the next time I get to play D&D.
	We've been doing a session, or a campaign, I should say, digitally with some friends that live out of state, and I have been having a good time, and I have a good fun character that I'm excited to explore further.
	Plus, every time I play D&D, it reminds me how happy I am that D&D has somehow become genuinely popular in my lifetime.
	Yeah, that is wild to think about.
	Like, when I saw, I just remember when I saw Matt Mercer doing D&D with Vin Diesel, and it's just like, yeah, okay, what even is, like... Well, the thing is that Vin Diesel has been a known lover of D&D for a while, that, like, you know, he was one of the actors that's been out there stuffing for it for a while, but then, like, you hear, it's, like, I heard, I don't know if it's still going or how long it's been going on, but at one point it was just like, oh yeah, like, Listen to this new D&D podcast we're doing with Jeff Goldblum!
	And I'm just like, really?
	Jeff Goldblum's just on a D&D podcast?
	What the fuck, what the fuck life am I living now?
	They're just like, they're just live recording their games and putting it out in podcast form.
	And also, oh yeah, by the way, one of our players is Jeff fucking Goldblum.
	And I can only imagine what he's like at a D&D table, but I'm assuming that shit has to be buckwild, so... No, I do really love that one of my favorite childhood hobbies that was one of the clearest indications that I was a nerd slash dork in high school has now become, like... I was on public transportation commuting to work, The other day or comedic home from work and there were these like kids Well, I call them kids because I'm an old man now But there were these people and like they're young and they're they're early to mid 20s And they were just on the train talking about getting super high and playing D&D and I was just like rock on.
	Yeah Usually you would have to keep that stuff to yourself But these people were confident enough to be just talking about it on a train surrounded by strangers They were talking about getting high like stealing griffin eggs or whatever.
	I'm just like this rules Yeah, I mean... Yeah, go ahead.
	Yeah, I remember, like, when I was into D&D as a kid, it was like a gateway into Satanism.
	Like, the satanic panic was about D&D, and how, like, you were actual witches because you were trying to summon spells and invoke demons, and now we've gone from that bullshit to, like, anyone who's anybody and has a modicum of fame is just like, hey, I'm doing a podcast about D&D this week!
	Like, um...
	It has to be, like, fairly cheap to produce.
	You just need the materials and to get your friends together and just really... Yeah, no, there's so much.
	Yeah, it's one of those things where it turns out acting experience probably helps you be good at it or at the very least understand what's going on.
	Right.
	You're just like, oh, I have to get into this character and make my decisions based on what this person that doesn't exist would do.
	And like, I have to make that up on the fly.
	Anyway, what about you, Mike?
	What are you looking forward to?
	Hopefully resolution on my terrible car.
	We are racing towards that moment, so hopefully that will be taken care of.
	We're not racing anywhere currently, let's be fair.
	This is true, this is very true.
	Your car is broken, and that is the point.
	Bazinga!
	Yep, yeah.
	So yeah, so I'm looking forward to that and just also looking forward to the power of air conditioning because holy shit yesterday was Like, oppressive doesn't even begin to describe how hot it was outside yesterday in the Commonwealth, the Bay State, all that good stuff.
	It was, oh boy.
	Wow, if you think it was bad in New England, you should have seen how it was in Old England, because boy, fuck it out, eh?
	Yeah, I know, I know.
	Those people are totally screwed.
	I heard it got to 108 in London.
	Hey, keep denying global warming now, you fucking assholes!
	Or, if you happen to be a listener from across the pod, and you're one of the good guys, we are very sorry that this is happening to you.
	It sucks.
	Yeah, but holy shit.
	I saw a post where they were talking about, oh, look at all these fake fires in Europe now from climate change.
	And they immediately post pictures of people committing arson to try to make it look like it's climate change.
	There's always a conspiracy to try to explain why things are happening.
	And it's like, how about things are just getting really hot, and when things get really hot and they're dry, when they get lit on fire, they burn easier.
	How about that?
	Let's Occam's Razor this shit just a little.
	No?
	We're not doing that?
	Okay, fine.
	Fine.
	Whatever.
	I mean...
	I saw a lady on Twitter, she's like, hey, I'm an Indian here, I just want to let all the people in England know, like, fuck up, your ancestors conquered countries in this kind of heat.
	And I was like, ooh, alright.
	Boom.
	Roasted.
	And I'm talking literally, rimshot, waka waka.
	Okay.
	Well, that's going to do it for our show for the week.
	Thank you everybody for listening and for your continued support.
	But for now, the boys have to mount their wretched pogo sticks and bounce slowly outside of Hellworld for the week.
	But we appreciate the support.
	If you'd like to continue to support us, you can do so For free, literally no dollars, by giving us a five-star review or any sort of favorable review on any platform where you can get our podcast.
	Or you can tell a friend if you think that they would like to listen to three jerks talk about some QAnon stuff with a smattering of pop culture references that nobody knows about from a bygone time.
	If you have money and you want to give it to us, you can do so, as we mentioned earlier, by visiting our Patreon at patreon.com slash PokerPolitics.
	There we have over 40 hours of bonus content available behind our mighty $5 a month paywall.
	Once you have access to that content, you can listen to Cobalt, you can listen to What We Do Out of Shadows, and you can listen to Mule's Errand, which is going to be wrapping up, I believe, next week.
	All of that is us discussing weird QAnon pop media, a trend that is going to continue.
	And I say pop media in the sense that it's just like, you know, it's movies and junk.
	It's not actually popular.
	So just fill your role.
	So yeah, $5 or more a month will get you access to that stuff by becoming one of our beautifuller babies.
	If you have money and you don't want to give it to us, we totally understand.
	You can do some good with it by donating it to love146.org.
	We're an organization whose vision is the end of child trafficking and exploitation.
	Or, you can go ahead and donate it to whatever charity you'd like to support Ukraine in their defense against Russian aggression.
	Or, you can just do your part to help the blue vote in the upcoming midterm elections.
	You know, there's a lot of good you could be doing with your money.
	So, do good with it if you would like.
	Give it to us if you'd like.
	Keep it in your pocket if you'd like.
	Try to buy a PS5 if you'd like.
	It's your fucking money.
	Who are us to tell you what to do with it?
	Big shout out to our friend DJ Minimal Effort for use of our intro song.
	Still no social media for DJ Minimal Effort.
	Sucks to be him.
	However, our buddy Frosty, who has done all of our bumps, including for our hottest, freshest, newest segment, the one that we just invented a couple of minutes ago, the Amuse Bouche.
	You can find him on Twitter at FrostyVO.
	You can find our show on Twitter at Hellworld.
	That's Hellworld spelled with a Q in place of the O. You can find our expert, Mike Rains, on Twitter at PokerPolitics.
	You can find me at HellworldL.
	Hellworld spelled the same way as before.
	And you can find Sarge on Twitter at SargeInHell.
	And that's going to do it for the boys for this week.
	So for myself, TheMysteriousL, our friend Sarge, and our expert in all things QAnon Crazy, Mr. Mike Rains,

▲