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April 18, 1995 - Art Bell

02:53:14

Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell - Building a Time Machine - Mad Man Marcum

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	You're listening to the best of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's program is a rebroadcast from April 18th, 1995.
	Please do not call.
	From the high desert and the great American Southwest, I bid you all good evening or good morning, as the case may be across all these many time zones.
	And welcome to another edition of Coast to Coast AM, live talk radio throughout the nighttime.
	Good to be here.
	We're going to do something a little different first.
	You may recall, I think it was the end of last week.
	Yes, it was.
	Saturday morning.
	I read you a story that was faxed to me by somebody in Columbia, Missouri.
	And I thought it incredible.
	The story is entitled, Kansas City Man Tries to Build Time Machine on Porch.
	Now, in case you don't remember the About the general tenure of the article, I'm going to remind you now.
	Kansas City Associated Press.
	When a Missouri factory worker set out to make a time machine on his back porch, the contraption he came up with was not completely off the mark, theoretically, according to scientists.
	But the high-voltage electrical transformer that Michael Markham had hooked up to two vertical metal rods would more likely have killed him, or blown up his house, than carried him into the past or future.
	Time travel, though enticingly possible in the mathematics of Einstein's theory of relativity, is not likely in the physical universe, they say.
	They go on to quote, it is a very interesting area, though there are theoretical physicists working on those areas, and I will not say that it's total nonsense.
	This was according to the chairman at the physics department at the University of Missouri at Kansas City.
	But he went on, it's not something that you can demonstrate with batteries.
	And I guess that was Michael's problem.
	So are the Stanbury Police, who say the voltage that Markham had diverted into the contraption caused power interruptions in and around the northwest Missouri town of about 1300.
	Markham had connected the metal rods to the terminals of a transformer, one of six stolen from a utility company, In hopes of creating a large spark gap with ascending electrical arcs, Markham was arrested January 29th on a felony charge of stealing the transformers from a St.
	Joseph light and power generating station in King City.
	He pleaded guilty last month, was placed on five years probation.
	Police said the transformers had a capacity of 12 to 76,000 volts each, Enough to easily cause electrocution or an explosion.
	Markham, who told police that he has two years of college-level electrical engineering, said he was building a time machine, but didn't have enough power for it.
	That's according to the Stanbury Police Chief, Tom Hampton.
	Hampton said, quote, he's not nuts.
	He appears to be an intelligent person with a lack of common sense, maybe.
	Hampton said Markham told officers he had not tried to enter the spark gap, and neither had anyone else.
	If anyone had, they probably would have been electrocuted, not transported in time.
	Presumably, he decided that if he got enough electricity together, he could build a time machine, because there is the concept that if you're going to do it, it's going to require an enormous amount of energy.
	So, there it was, and you know me, and these kinds of stories.
	And how I'm fascinated by time.
	So, I set out to find young Mr. Markham.
	And I found him.
	I found him.
	It wasn't easy.
	I went through a couple of our affiliates.
	And then I just started going to phone directories and rooting about.
	And lo and behold, there was a new number.
	And it was Michael's.
	And I've got Michael here.
	And so I thought I would ask him, and I did a little earlier today, and we're going to go through it right now and find out exactly what it is Michael was trying to do.
	we'll get back to him in just a moment uh... michael are you there
	Uh, yeah.
	Good.
	Uh, first of all, had you heard that story before?
	Uh, about, uh... Yeah, the one I just read?
	Uh, yeah.
	You've heard that, huh?
	Yeah.
	It's like I'm, like, collecting clippings on it now.
	Oh, you are?
	Yeah.
	How old are you, Michael?
	Uh, 21.
	21.
	Pretty young.
	Yeah, very.
	Um, now, let's go kind of back through the story like you and I did, uh, Earlier today, this all began... Well, that's a good question.
	I didn't even ask that.
	Why did this begin in the first place?
	What were you trying to do in the first place?
	Originally, I just set out to make a fancy Jacob's Ladder, and this was what it turned out to be.
	A lot of people don't know what a Jacob's Ladder is.
	Tell them what it is.
	Simply in a nutshell it's like two metal rods with a spark going up in between it.
	and once it reaches the top it starts back to the bottom again
	so zzzzzzzz?
	zzzzzzzzzz?
	that kind of deal, right?
	yeah uh huh
	like from a Frankenstein movie yeah
	that's uh, like that's where they got started at
	Okay, well, there are ways to do that.
	The Van de Graaff generator, for example.
	You familiar with that?
	Uh, yeah.
	Uh, but you were gonna do it with, uh... Well, actually, how were you gonna do it?
	So, you told me something about winding your own transformer?
	Uh, yeah, that's, uh... Uh, that's what I originally did, uh, and, like, it's, uh, like, you know, uh...
	Well, let's stay with the transformer for a moment.
	How did you wind this transformer?
	use a laser, a modified CD laser for it.
	Well, let's stay with the transformer for a moment.
	How did you wind this transformer?
	How did you do that?
	Oh, well, it's pretty simple really.
	Uh, uh, I just take these metal, uh, took these metal plates and glued them together.
	Glue them together, yeah?
	Yeah, and the simplest transformers, there's two coils, your primary and your secondary.
	Right.
	Is it like making a giant ball of string or something?
	In other words, you just keep winding and winding and winding around?
	Yeah, well, there's like technical things, but simply put, it's like your primary coil will have maybe 400 turns, or it depends on how many watts you want to make it to.
	Let's say it's 400 turns in your primary, and say there's 4,000 turns in your secondary.
	10 times the turns, then you'll get 10 times the voltage.
	Right, okay, so is that about what you did?
	Four hundred and four thousand?
	Well, the small transformer had to change to a hundred and... I don't know how many turns.
	I always count.
	I never bother to count the second.
	About 450 turns in the primary.
	So you just kept winding?
	Yeah, until it got roughly 20,000 volts.
	20,000 volts?
	Yeah.
	So you went from 110 to 20,000?
	Yeah, roughly.
	Roughly.
	Um, alright.
	Um, without I take it very much current?
	Well, uh...
	Actually quite a bit, about roughly, it's drawing about 3,000 watts, so.
	Oh.
	Yeah, so our job is, let's see, it's probably about a tenth of an amp.
	That's a considerate amount, 20,000 volts.
	Oh yeah, that'll knock you right on your butt.
	Oh yeah.
	So then you did this, you built this thing, and you had the arc, and you were able to achieve the arc, is that correct?
	Yeah.
	Alright, so here you have this beautiful arc going... Or was it not quite going the way you wanted it to?
	Well, it was like, a little bit touchy, it was like kind of touchy.
	Because it's like the bottom of the metal rods.
	Right.
	Where the spark starts, if they're too close together, the spark will stick.
	But if they're too far apart, it won't arc at all.
	So it's like real touchy.
	If I move it a fraction of a millimeter, the thing's stuck.
	And if I move it too far apart, it doesn't do anything.
	So what I set out to do is use the heat from a laser to To get it started or something?
	Yeah, like get it going by itself.
	I see.
	The heat from a laser, that's interesting.
	So the heat from a laser would attract the sparks, sort of?
	Well, in a way.
	The heat from a laser lowers the resistance to the air, is what it does.
	Right, gotcha.
	So you got this laser by, how'd you get the laser?
	Well, I practically made it from scratch.
	I took a CD laser and redid all the electronics in it.
	Kind of like reinforcing it, you'd say.
	A CD laser?
	So you tore apart a CD player?
	Yeah.
	And so then you got the laser.
	Did it do what you wanted it to do?
	You know, start the spark?
	Yeah, it had some other effects I didn't expect.
	Well, and therein lies the story.
	Other effects you didn't expect, like what?
	Well, it's like, uh, uh, there's like, that spark's pretty hot, so you won't have, like, a heat signature, like, right above it.
	But, uh... You mean kind of like a haze, a hazy, uh, glow or something?
	Well, kind of like, like, wavy.
	If you ever, like, if you, like, take a lighter and, like, look right above it, you'll see, like, you'll, like, see, like, the heat from it.
	That's right.
	You know, it's like real dank.
	But, uh, no, I was expecting, uh, I know that it's going to be, like, uh, probably an extra, like, like a bigger heat signature from the laser, but, uh, uh, this one was, like, strange, like, uh, almost circular, uh, right above it.
	It was, like, the regular, uh, heat signature, but it was, like, a, uh, kind of, like, it was, like, almost, kind of, like, the circular shape in the center.
	Sort of like a, um, A glow?
	Not really a glow.
	It's like, if you don't really look at it, you can't see it.
	It's like normal.
	Is it like, you know when you're out in the desert in the middle of summer and you see the shimmering coming off a road?
	Yeah.
	Is it like that?
	Yeah, but it's like, normally those are just wavy lines straight up and down, kind of.
	Right.
	But this one I had the straight up and down ones, they were like It's kind of like a circular shape in the center.
	Huh.
	At first I didn't know what it was.
	I'm not 100% certain now.
	That's what I'm working on now.
	Wait a minute.
	You're back at this again?
	Huh?
	You're back at this again, are you?
	Yeah, I'm just picking up where I left off.
	Not doing anything illegal.
	We'll get to that.
	When I called you earlier today, you said, gee, it's while you caught me or something, I just got out of jail?
	I got out of jail March 30th.
	Oh, March 30th.
	Well, that's pretty much just out of jail.
	Yeah.
	And you're able to do this program tonight because you are more or less not employed.
	Yeah, I got all kinds of free time right now.
	Were you employed, Michael, back when you got in trouble?
	When I was arrested?
	Yeah, I was.
	In fact, I was supposed to go to work the next day.
	So in other words, this cost you your job?
	Uh, in a way, because there's, like, other things branching off this, but my boss thought I contaminated his plant with PCBs, but that's another story.
	I guess from the Transformers, huh?
	Yeah, because one of the Transformers that... Well, wait a minute, we're getting ahead of ourselves here.
	All right, let's go back.
	See, we're with your first small contraption.
	That's all I can think of to call it.
	You told me something about throwing a bolt or a screw or something.
	Yeah, a sheet metal screw.
	See, I didn't know what this thing was, and I was like, I don't know, I just got the notion to throw a screw in it and see what it did.
	I never saw anything like that before.
	It's not like testing it.
	Yeah, a screw I guess would be as good as anything else.
	Yeah.
	Mine might do that too.
	Alright, so you threw a screw into the... Circular thing.
	Circular area.
	Yeah, it's like...
	I've talked to a couple of physicists.
	They call it a vortex.
	Alright, you threw it into what we'll call the vortex.
	Yeah.
	Alright, what happened to the screw?
	Well, I had this thing sitting on a table, right?
	Yeah.
	And I threw it in there and I didn't see it after that.
	It disappeared?
	Yeah, roughly.
	I did it three times.
	My laser burned up, so I knew it'd do that.
	I just didn't think it'd do it so quick.
	So it probably provided such a high SWR, it's called, standing wave ratio to the laser that it burned it up?
	Yeah, because I like kind of like over... I knew it.
	It's like pushing that farther than it was designed for is what it was.
	But you're telling me this thing disappeared.
	Yeah, that's what I'm trying to figure out right now.
	I did one of two things.
	I went half a second into the future and then I caught up with it, or I made like a real intense magnetic field.
	That's what I'm trying to figure out right now.
	All right, this is fascinating, Michael.
	It really is, because there are aspects of what you have done that are very much like... I've interviewed the people who did the Philadelphia Experiment, Michael.
	Yeah, that's what the Montauk Project is.
	And you're messing with the same sort of stuff.
	You're messing with the same sort of stuff.
	Oh, well, anyway, all right, so continue with the story.
	You got this, it disappeared, you blew up your laser, and then you sat there thinking, wow, I did something Yeah, it freaked me out.
	At first I thought I was seeing things.
	So what did you do?
	Go away and think about it for a day or two or a week?
	When did you finally get this brilliant light bulb of an idea to build a larger unit?
	Well, it's like a half a second is not very much.
	But I figure if I make a bigger one and send it farther, that way it could really tell if I was sending it through time or if I was just sending it through an intense magnetic field.
	Well, right.
	But what I mean is, how long did you think about whether you wanted to build a... Did it occur to you right away when you blew up your little one, I'm going to build a bigger one?
	Well, first off, I was like, after that thing burned out, literally after all the smoke cleared.
	Smoke?
	Yeah.
	In other words, there was sort of a reaction to the screw?
	Well, no, where the laser did.
	When I say the laser burned up, it literally caught fire, the electronics.
	Caught fire?
	Yeah.
	That's bad.
	Well, alright, so your equipment was smoldering.
	Yeah.
	I was thinking about rebuilding the laser, because the basic part of the laser is fine, but the part of the electronics, they were totally ruined.
	I was thinking... Just rebuild the electronics and try it again?
	Yeah, that's what I was thinking about doing.
	Basically, I almost had to start from scratch except building the transformer.
	But I figured I'd make just a bigger version of what I did.
	So, wanting a big transformer, you needed a lot of voltage to do this, right?
	Yeah.
	2,000 volts will arc, but 2,000 volts, that's like very touchy.
	That's like very touchy.
	And 10,000 or 20,000 volts really arcs?
	Yeah.
	Well, it's the wattage that make it arc.
	A welder will arc when it's only like 10 volts because there's so much amperage behind it.
	That's right.
	But you have to like get it real close.
	It's like at 2000 volts, it has to be within like half the bottom, the space between the
	rods at the bottom has to be like half a millimeter apart for an arc.
	How far apart were your two rods on the first small machine you built?
	About two inches.
	Two inches, huh?
	That's pretty good space.
	Yeah.
	So then it dawns on you, let's build a big one.
	Yeah.
	So now, I didn't ask you about this earlier, but in order to get enough voltage and current You needed a big transformer.
	Now, it's true, the power company has big transformers.
	Yeah.
	Really nice ones.
	Yeah.
	And, um, how did it dawn on you to, what's the word we should use, borrow one of the, or several of the power company's transformers?
	Uh, how did I get the idea for it?
	Yeah, I mean, you know, you knew you needed a transformer.
	How did it occur to you?
	Well, originally what I was going to do, I was, like, originally going to, like, buy them.
	Like, there's, like, a transformer company in Kansas City that makes them for the power company.
	Well, there was an idea.
	Yeah, but it's, like, I could have, like, saved my money and bought those, but those are expensive.
	How much is a transformer, just out of curiosity?
	Uh, well I'll give you an idea.
	When I buy them from the factory, I buy them at wholesale.
	But the St. Joseph Light & Power, the power company I stole them from,
	uh, they're about, they value, the six transformers a tuck, they value them at $13,600 some dollars.
	Oh my. So that's not shoplifting.
	Alright, Michael, hold on a moment. We've got a little business to do here.
	And we'll get right back to you.
	My guest is a very unusual person.
	My guest is Michael Markham, and he's in the business of building a time machine, and now he's going to go to work on it again.
	Wow.
	michael markham uh... back with us in just a moment with more about time travel
	uh...
	the the
	you This is the Fest of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18th, 1995.
	This is the best of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18, 1995.
	Please do not call.
	All right, we'll get to the phones.
	Be patient with me.
	We're talking to Michael Markham.
	Maybe... Maybe some might be tempted to call him Madman Markham.
	God, I love this music.
	Back now to Michael.
	Michael, are you there?
	Uh, yeah.
	They don't call you Madman Markham, do they?
	Uh, I haven't been called that yet.
	I just made that up, Michael.
	Don't let it bother you.
	All right, so here we are, wanting now to build our big, at this point, what were you calling it, by the way?
	Obviously, it was no little entertainment thing anymore.
	Uh, well, like I said, I'm not sure what this thing was.
	It was either a tent magnetic field or some sort of time machine.
	Well, actually, it would have been a combination of electrical and, uh, A magnetic field, I guess.
	Yeah.
	So, anyway, plans got big.
	You decided you wanted to build a great big one.
	So, according to the story, you had two big poles on your porch.
	Is that correct?
	Yeah, three-eighths inch metal rods.
	Really?
	How big?
	You mean how long?
	Yeah.
	Roughly four feet.
	Oh, that would have made a big spark.
	Yep.
	Big spark.
	And, uh, so you had the rods, and you needed the transformers desperately.
	Yeah.
	You probably could have saved up for it, but you didn't.
	You made a mistake.
	Yeah.
	And you... In a hurry.
	So what did you do?
	Did you sneak into their yard?
	Oh, you mean, uh, the... In other words, how'd you get the transformers?
	You didn't heist them off a pole, of course.
	Oh, heck no.
	Uh-huh.
	So... They were noticed immediately.
	They were gone then.
	But, uh, these were just, uh, set by a substation in King City.
	Just sittin' there.
	They've been sittin' there ever since I moved to Missouri.
	You hated to see them languishing without use.
	Yeah, well, they were just sittin' there rusting.
	And heck, they don't even use them.
	Heck, in fact, right now they've got them put away for safe keeping, they say.
	Probably historical record.
	Yeah, now.
	So anyway, what did you do?
	Take a pickup truck?
	Those things are heavy, aren't they?
	Yeah, the biggest one I had.
	The biggest one I had weighed 350 pounds.
	Well then, you must have had an accomplice.
	Yeah, a couple of them.
	A couple of them?
	Yeah, I haven't talked to them.
	Their court date wasn't the same as mine, and they looked too happy with me.
	I'm sure they weren't.
	So, anyway, somehow you talked them into helping you out in this venture.
	Yeah.
	And you snuck down there, no doubt, late at night.
	Well, it was right in broad daylight.
	Broad daylight?
	Yeah, roughly 11 o'clock in the morning.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Wow.
	So, in broad daylight, you took the transformers, loaded them up in a pickup truck, I guess?
	Yeah.
	And hauled them to your house?
	Yep.
	I see.
	And you had how many of them?
	Six.
	Why six, Michael?
	Well, uh... I mean, why did you feel you needed six?
	Well, originally, I just wanted to take a couple of them, but it's like, uh... You got carried away?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	I see.
	Alright, uh, so you got the Transformers to your house, and, um, then you, um, I guess hooked up the secondary, uh, no, it would have been the primary of the Transformer, to the poles, correct?
	Uh, yeah, basically I hooked it backwards.
	Yeah, that's right.
	Backwards.
	So the primary was hooked up to the poles of the secondary.
	You hooked up to the power coming into your home?
	Yeah.
	What happened when you did that, by the way?
	Well, I didn't get the big version of it.
	I didn't get the laser part yet.
	I was going to order that from New Jersey.
	Had you produced a large spark with it?
	Uh, yeah.
	See, that's another thing, too.
	Before, I was, like, arrested on the 30th, and on February 3rd, I was going to pick up, like, 60 feet worth of cable so I could reinforce the cable to my house.
	You mean actually coming in from the pole?
	Uh, yeah.
	What were you going to do?
	Climb the pole?
	Uh, pretty much.
	Oh, Michael.
	Because I figured if I called the power company and had them reinforce the cable in my house, I'd, like, draw suspicion, so.
	Uh-huh.
	So, well, I'm sure it would.
	Yes, it would.
	You would want to know why.
	Yeah, why I'd need a cable that carries 2,000 amps instead of the usual 200.
	Now, so you did, though.
	You nevertheless hooked it up and you turned it on, didn't you?
	Uh, yeah, I hooked up the smallest one that could hook up without, like, overloading the cable and causing a fire.
	Yeah?
	What happened?
	Uh, well, it's pretty, just that in itself is just like a, a giant Jacob's Ladder.
	Like a... How, how, how, um...
	How far apart were you able to get these poles and still produce the spark?
	About 18 inches.
	18 inches?
	Yes.
	It was the smallest one I had.
	It changed to 240 to 12,470.
	uh... had uh... uh...
	12,470.
	changed uh... uh...
	uh... it can't afford a good twelve thousand four seventy twelve thousand
	four hundred seventy uh...
	so when you did this according to the newspaper you blocked
	out or browned out portions of your whole town is that correct
	Yeah, I was like overloading the power grid, because I was drawing more power than I thought I was.
	Well, what got you caught?
	Was that what got you caught?
	No, uh, uh, uh, in a nutshell, a friend of mine was at my house as well.
	And...uh...
	Somebody squealed on you?
	I don't know.
	I don't know what happened, but, uh, exactly.
	And I'll probably never know.
	That's in the past.
	I ain't really worried about that now, but, uh, what happened was a friend of mine, like, from my house, uh, shot a BB gun.
	Like, shot up my next door neighbor's sliding glass door window.
	Uh-huh.
	Yeah, and I, like, got the cops snooping around, so...
	And they just happened to see this incredible rig on your porch?
	Uh, no.
	That happened at roughly... I can't remember.
	I guess it was back into January.
	It probably happened around noon or 1 o'clock or something like that.
	And they came by with a search warrant at 11 o'clock at night.
	So obviously they had seen it then and they decided... Well, they've never been in the house.
	Right, but they didn't have to be to see the porch, did they?
	Well, it was like the porch was closed in, and all the windows were boarded up.
	Oh, I see.
	Stuff like that, I gotta keep out of sight.
	Could it be, I guess, Michael, when you started a big gap, an 18-inch gap like that, it would have created an intense white light?
	Well, let's see, it was a 5,000-watt spark, so...
	It would have been very intense, and maybe from your neighbor's perspective, Michael, they would hear this, and their lights would dim, and they'd look over at your portion, they'd see this white light streaming out from all the little cracks and places, and they'd get worried.
	Could that be?
	That's a possibility.
	All right, all right, so... The main thing, they were like... See, it's like a... It was like a... That's one of the reasons I moved from Stamfordbury, because half that town wants my head on a pole, I have the feeling.
	You mean they don't like you now?
	Well, it's like a... I don't know if this is, like, I don't know if this is just another unfounded rumor or not, but, like, a lot of those people's television sets are ruined and stuff like that, because I was, like, drawing too much power, and it was like... Like, normally it's between 110 and 120 volt outlet, Well, it's like, uh, they were estimating, this is what I've heard, I don't know if it's a fact or not, but they were estimating I was, like, bringing it down to, like, 80 volts, 80, 90 volts.
	That is damaging to electronic gear.
	Yeah.
	Mm-hmm.
	So, a lot of people in town with appliances that now are door stops are probably not happy with you.
	Uh, yeah, pretty much.
	Most of it, most of it, uh, most of it is just, uh, like, uh, lights with clickers, like, dim roll pads, stuff like that.
	But evidently people that were just happening to be watching TV when I operated it, they
	operated that thing at night too.
	So.
	Yes.
	That way, you know, a whole lot of people were like, I hadn't, see at first when I hooked
	this thing up I thought it was a 5,000 watts of work.
	I figured it'd be, well, see these transformers ain't as efficient as I first thought they
	would be.
	Uh huh.
	Yeah, well.
	It was drawing a heck of a lot more than I thought.
	A lot more current?
	Yeah.
	You weren't going to walk into the middle of that spark gap, were you?
	No.
	I was like, if I made the big version, if it did the same thing, I was going to do something else.
	Something that's Something a little bigger than a screw to disappear, maybe.
	Yeah, like made in orange or something like that, and if it came out like in one piece without getting fried to a crisp... Then you would have walked in?
	Well, there's other things, too.
	Like the Philadelphia Experiment.
	People were, like, from what I've heard, people were... Buried in the deck?
	Yeah, embedded in walls and stuff like that.
	Yeah, because you can't tell where you're coming back out.
	Yeah, because you lose your time lock, but...
	Would you have eventually done it?
	If the orange came out okay, and then maybe you tossed a cat in or something?
	If the cat came out okay?
	I don't want to say that, but I figured.
	You were going to toss a cat in.
	Well, if everything else came out alright, like totally unscathed.
	Then the cat would have gone in.
	Well, I'd probably try something out alive and small, like a grasshopper or something like that.
	That would be good.
	Yeah.
	Before the cat.
	Yeah.
	All right, Michael.
	Hold on.
	We'll be right back to you in a second.
	uh... we're gonna find out what he's experimenting with right now and i may
	take a couple calls here all right michael are you there
	Yes.
	Good.
	Michael, now you're a free man again, out of the pokey, and ready to begin experiments I've just learned all over again.
	You're going to do this again, huh?
	Yep, pretty much.
	Pretty much.
	Well, you don't give up easily, I'll say that for you.
	Nope.
	By the way, what did everybody think of you when you were in jail?
	I assume you told them this story.
	No, until the media started taking it seriously, everybody thought I was a nutcase.
	You sound sane, to me.
	Yeah, pretty much.
	A little on the wild side, but sane.
	Anyway, so, what are you going to do now?
	How are you going to rebuild it, in other words?
	Right now, well, right now I'm just basically saving my money in the world.
	I do what I originally set out to do, buy them.
	You gonna buy the Transformers?
	Uh, yep.
	What would be the legality of your using them if you bought them?
	Would that be perfectly legal?
	Should be, I mean.
	As long as I don't do anything like that.
	You mentioned you lost your job.
	How did your employer think you polluted his workplace with PCPs?
	I mean, you had not taken these apart, right?
	Well, one of them I couldn't use, and I didn't really want to take it back there and get caught taking it back, so I figured I might as well strip the copper out of it.
	So you took it apart?
	Yeah, and while I was originally, I didn't really just dump it on the porch.
	That was kind of like an accident, but I was like taking the oil and putting it in a plastic wastebasket.
	It was like a 3,000 watt transformer.
	That's pretty small for a pole, like a utility pole.
	It weighs like 150 pounds and I was like the only one doing it and my finger slipped and I ended up dropping it and dumping like 10 gallons of oil all over the back porch.
	Oops.
	Yeah.
	And anyway, I ended up getting it all over me too because it splattered and evidently Anyhow, it's like, uh, got all the back porch.
	Well, anyhow, the shoes that, uh, that I was wearing at the time were also the shoes that I wear to work.
	And he saw I tracked TCBs into it, and, uh, where I used to work, he saw I tracked them into his plant.
	Tracked TCBs in his plant.
	I see.
	So that was the end of your job.
	Uh, well, he didn't really say that, but, uh, I have that feeling.
	Because, uh, he, like, asked me, uh, who in all was in my house, who in all was around those transformers and stuff like that.
	Mm-hmm.
	Has the EPA knocked on your door yet, Michael?
	Uh, no.
	It turns out, uh, it turns out the transformer took apart.
	Uh, I tried telling them that, but they wouldn't take my word for it.
	The transformer took apart.
	It was, like, too old.
	It was darned old.
	It was, like, too old.
	There was, like, four PCBs around it.
	It turned out just to be plain old crude oil.
	Oh!
	I'm sure you were personally relieved a little about that.
	Well, it's like, I was almost certain that that was all it was, because, uh, I'll put it this way.
	Last time that transformer was even checked was in 1924.
	I see.
	Well, so you're going to try this again.
	You're going to save up money, buy the stuff, and try it again.
	Are you going to do it on the big scale the way you did last time?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	Right now, I'm... Going to be on your back porch?
	Well, I'm living in an apartment right now, and I'm on the third floor, too, so I'll probably move before I do that.
	That might be good.
	Yeah.
	That might not go well in an apartment.
	Yeah, plus the power that's going to my apartment is only 10,000 watts, so if I draw more than that, I'll overload the transformer and blow it.
	Just a theoretical question for you.
	Let's say that you produced a time machine, Michael.
	And you actually managed to go either forward or reverse in time.
	What would you use it for?
	The time machine?
	Heck, there's possibilities.
	There are endless.
	Yeah, I guess they are.
	I guess I'm asking, Michael, would you use it to make money?
	I'd be one of the things I'd do.
	It wouldn't be the only thing I'd do.
	I mean, like give an example.
	Right now there's like an AIDS plague.
	Kind of like a 20th century Black Death.
	That's right.
	So I don't know exactly when they're going to have like a vaccine for AIDS or anything like that.
	But you might try to bring one back.
	Yeah.
	That's a good answer.
	Yeah.
	Michael, let me... Same thing with cancer and stuff like that.
	Well, it's true.
	It is true.
	Let me bring a caller on and see what... Every line is lit up here, and I'm curious what the audience has to say about this.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Yes, hi.
	Maureen from Redding, California.
	Yes.
	Hi.
	Unless I'm misunderstanding your guest there and yourself, I am just really blown away by exactly what you have been talking about, because I've always been real impressed with you, Art, as far as I've always thought you as to be a person of high intelligence, what have you, your guests you've had on your show in the past.
	I've always been impressed with that, but this has got to be the lamest thing I've ever heard in my life.
	You don't believe it?
	Let's teach somebody how to make an atomic bomb, what have you.
	What do you think about that, Michael?
	How do you feel about that?
	Would you build an atomic bomb if you could?
	Build an atomic bomb?
	No, I doubt it.
	See, he wouldn't go for an atomic bomb, ma'am.
	He's talking about time travel.
	Now, what's so bad about that?
	Well... I mean, do you think it's dangerous, or what?
	No, well...
	Um, I think it's, I think it's just very dangerous as far as, um, I'm sure some of the listeners that you, that you have... Okay, okay, maybe this will help.
	Maybe this will help, ma'am.
	Listen everybody, do not try this at home.
	Well, see, basically you're going step by step by step.
	That's right.
	We absolutely are.
	That's right.
	Why are you doing that?
	Well, why do you think?
	Are you worried that somebody's going to do this at home and fry themselves?
	Of course!
	Of course!
	There's idiots out there in the world, you know.
	But, ma'am, there are people... I could interview somebody who walked off a cliff.
	Do you think that that would mean that my listeners would walk off a cliff?
	I really doubt you would have a guest on there who would try To walk off a cliff.
	I have always looked to you... But what I'm saying is... The King of You has always been a person... I really admire you, Art Bell.
	Now you're disappointed.
	And I enjoy your show, and you're a very intelligent human being.
	I am totally blown away that you would have somebody such as the guest you have on tonight.
	Why?
	I'm sorry if I'm... Well, the question is why.
	Because of... All this... The subject that you are discussing, um, you know, Yes.
	Basically, there are adults out there in this world who have a childlike mind who will be, um, ignorant enough to try this kind of thing at home.
	Okay.
	Alright, alright.
	Thank you.
	Uh, Michael?
	Yeah?
	Uh, I'm gonna hold you over a little bit.
	This is too much fun.
	Uh, now, um, tell him, Michael, say, don't try this at home.
	Don't try this at home.
	Thank you, Michael.
	and my we're going to do a little news and we'll be right back.
	My more.
	My.
	Thank you.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18th, 1995.
	Please do not pause.
	Good morning!
	Um, I have a guest, and his name is Michael Markham.
	Affectionately, we'll call him Madman Markham.
	And he's in Missouri.
	I think he's in Missouri.
	And, um, Michael, uh, I read the story, um, uh, last week.
	And I'm not going to go through it again, but it's entitled, Kansas City Man Tries to Build Time Machine on Porch.
	Now, long story short, he built a small... It wasn't supposed to be a time machine to begin with.
	It was just supposed to produce an arc and be cool.
	And his small model, which he used a laser from a CD, To cause the spark to begin to move up Jacob's Ladder, it's what it's called, Jacob's Ladder.
	When he got it all going, he noticed a very strange, sort of shimmery effect above the arc, and he threw a screw into it, common screw, and the screw disappeared.
	Well, now we're into something else.
	So, our hero, Michael, went over to the power company and appropriated, stole, Uh, six power transformers, which he then hooked up to his line at home and made a giant model on his back porch using two gigantic poles.
	Uh, about four feet high.
	And, uh, he got himself a big, uh, Jacob's Ladder.
	He also, uh, ruined a number of appliances, uh, browned out most of the town that he lives in.
	And, uh, that, of course, is where the police entered the picture.
	And appropriated Michael's Transformers.
	He lost his job.
	He went to jail.
	He's recently out.
	I somehow found him yesterday.
	We've been interviewing him for an hour, and we will continue to do so in a moment.
	Every line is jam-packed full, so a lot of people want to talk to Michael.
	A couple of faxes that have come in.
	Here's one.
	Art, all my life I've been reading books and collections of unsolved mysteries and events.
	Several times I've come across a story about archaeologists discovering a perfectly machined, completely modern sheet metal screw.
	This screw was embedded in a piece of quartz that is at least 10 million years old.
	This has always been a totally unexplainable, unsolved mystery until tonight.
	Dave in New Brownville, Texas.
	Then this.
	Great show, Art.
	If time travel is possible, be aware the Earth, Solar System, and Universe are traveling thousands of miles per hour.
	If Michael Screws traveled through time, they'd be far from here in space.
	That's from Albany, Oregon.
	And this.
	I'm going to fax a diagram to you, basically what your guest is talking about, except that it will not work with electrical energy.
	A massive power source Such as your guest is speaking about would create something that is more than anyone at this time would want to deal with.
	This system was being played with in Colorado, without getting into names, using low frequency EMF.
	This.
	Hey Art, I think the time machine idea is interesting, but did the bolt come back exactly the same?
	Was the bolt Uh, analyzed to see if the material had changed at all.
	And on and on and on.
	I've got a whole pile of faxes here.
	Michael, did anybody analyze the bolt?
	Uh, uh, no.
	Uh, uh, just by looking at it, uh, uh, it weighed the same.
	It looked the same.
	It looks exactly the way it did before I threw it in.
	So the bolt literally disappeared from view.
	I mean, when you threw it in and it went into the field, Michael, in uh...
	and i would have disappeared when it came back was it still suspended in air and then did it drop down or
	what well uh...
	but i think that the thing was like that on paper and normally when you like
	like a trip that may like a lot of proper problem and land that's right
	uh... i think that like go to the air
	it got a lot of care on the table while so it's been other words you through it and in midair
	it literally disappeared
	and when next you thought it was laying on the table Yeah, I did that three times because I figured, well, maybe I'd, like, miss seeing it, like, go through the air.
	And the third time you did it, I take it that's when your laser blew up.
	Yeah.
	I was, like, going through that several times.
	I was, like, wanting to, like, turn it off and borrow a camcorder and get it on tape.
	Oh, boy, I wish you'd done that.
	Yeah, but... Sure you do, too.
	Yeah.
	These are always things, though, that you think about later.
	Let's keep perusing the phone lines here and see what people have to say about us.
	Really interesting.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hi.
	Hi.
	This is Stanbury, Missouri.
	You are the arresting officer?
	Yes, sir.
	Well, I'll be darned.
	It's great to meet you.
	I don't know if it's great for Michael.
	Are you guys friends?
	Well, are we friends, Mike?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, sort of.
	Well, listen.
	Maybe, officer, you can give us all of this from your perspective.
	what did you find when you arrived at michael's house well we uh...
	knocked on the door there was it was
	uh... thirteen interview
	uh... there's a lot of her standard we had uh...
	canada people about three hour patrol let let let let me back up a little
	officer well if you can You got a search warrant, obviously because you suspected something was going on.
	What was the basis of the warrant?
	What did you think was going on there?
	We had received information that Michael had these Transformers in his residence and that they had been stolen.
	Checking with my local utility, which we have our own utility service here in Stanbury.
	We found out they weren't from here.
	We checked with St.
	Joe Light and Power out of King City.
	The man didn't know they were gone until we called him.
	That's when we found out they were stolen.
	With the information we had, he gave us enough information to go ahead and get a search warrant.
	So, you got access to the resident with a warrant.
	What did you find?
	Well, we found Michael asleep.
	we had to wake him up.
	Uh-huh.
	That, we found the transformer he had made into a piggy bank
	in the, I guess you'd call it a dining room.
	The back porch was the transformer that he'd used to make his Jacob's Ladder.
	And then there were four more transformers in a secondary bedroom.
	Uh-huh.
	And so then off Michael went to the pokey, I presume.
	Yes, uh, what's the... as we call it, the Albany Hilton.
	He's in jail.
	Well, this is quite an incredible story.
	How did you feel?
	I mean, did you think you were dealing with a madman or what?
	No, I had met Mike by the second day after he came into the state on another search warrant deal.
	I see.
	Talked to him just a little bit that day.
	He appeared to be an intelligent person.
	What I consider above average intelligence sometimes.
	And then he was here in Stanbury.
	I had calls because people didn't know who he was.
	He was a stranger from out of town.
	He says he's not particularly welcome in that town now.
	That a number of people feel as though their appliances may have gone belly up because of his experiments.
	Well, I haven't personally had any comments of that nature.
	I did hear your earlier part of your broadcast where he browned out the majority of town, which was not right.
	It was just a small section, approximately two blocks, where we had a little problem where the lights would flicker and brown out a little bit.
	Had this been occurring frequently?
	No, it actually happened.
	It happened a few times, and it quit happening.
	We found out from Mike that he moved his experiment to later at night when people wouldn't notice it.
	Aha.
	Wise decision.
	Well, this is quite a story, Officer.
	I'm absolutely glad you called, Michael.
	Is there anything you'd like to ask him or the other way around?
	Uh...
	Think about it, Mark.
	Are you suggesting that Michael should not proceed to try this again?
	I personally wouldn't.
	Because of all the hazards involved, electricity is a very dangerous toy.
	Indeed.
	And it's just one slip, and it's your last slip.
	I wouldn't do it.
	Well, I did like his electric cigarette lighter, and you might have him explain that to you.
	His electrical cigarette lighter?
	Yes.
	All right, officer.
	Oh, the one I made out of the microwave?
	Yeah.
	Ah.
	Officer, thank you.
	Thank you, sir.
	We appreciate you calling the arresting officer in the case.
	Wow.
	All right, Michael, what about your cigarette lighter?
	What's this?
	Oh, heck, I still got it now, but basically I turned my microwave, it's still a microwave, but I made a cigarette lighter out of it, too.
	Out of what?
	My microwave.
	Your microwave oven?
	Yeah.
	There's a transformer inside that.
	You like transformers, don't you, Michael?
	Yeah, it's kind of like... I guess you'd call it a hobby.
	I've always been interested in it.
	I've always been interested.
	I've been interested in those things since I was like 12 or 13.
	You know, there were physicists in this article who commented that you were actually more or less on the right track.
	I mean, they sort of, even though they didn't think you should be doing it, they more or less endorsed the direction you were going in with regard to time travel.
	Yeah.
	And so, I'm kind of with you.
	I mean, I know the young lady in the office is saying, don't do it, don't do it, don't do it.
	Yeah.
	Well, they're afraid I'm going to turn myself into fried bacon or something.
	Well, of course, and you may.
	Yeah.
	You may.
	I mean, there is that risk, isn't there?
	Yeah, because with high voltage, you don't have to touch it.
	You just get too close to it, and you're gone.
	You get in the corona, and that's all she wrote.
	Yeah.
	And that's actually what you were talking about doing, ultimately, getting in that corona.
	Yeah.
	Um, all right, um, east of the, uh, Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hello.
	Armageddon Sky.
	Yes.
	In New Orleans.
	New Orleans, yes.
	Yes, uh, Michael?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, uh, first off, I think I'd like to party with you, dude.
	it uh... o'clock o'clock o'clock o'clock o'clock all i i i i i what i looked like
	about me that can to my favorite question of all time uh... what if we try this and also why not
	uh...
	it really it really is true and with the comment of the businesses here in the
	article uh...
	i mean the i'd really do understand he is investigative curious mind i'm
	I'm very much the same way.
	Right, because anything's possible unless it's already been proven physically not to be possible.
	But just a couple of comments and then one question.
	I hope you're taking and leaving very good notes.
	Because, you know, you may send yourself into the wild blue yonder, and someone can maybe pick up where you left off, even though we would say we'd miss you.
	And next thing is, if you do see yourself making progress, I'm sure you'll be taking everything, you know, wisely and step by step.
	Do not let any kind of big company, bureaucracy or anything Uh, horn in or try and get in on a piece of the action, because you know what that'll end up being like, just like everything else.
	It'll be totally taken away from your control, and, uh, you'll just be more or less cast to the wayside.
	Yeah, that's what I'm worried about right now.
	Yeah.
	Uh, I would just move carefully before you make any decision or any step, because I've got, you know, some government experience.
	And, uh, just, you know, just take a very careful step.
	Don't ever jump into anything.
	Yeah.
	And, uh, my last question is, uh, Next time you, uh, I guess that Vortex, uh, I guess for lack of a better word, it doesn't sound like exactly what it was, but anyway.
	That's the way you describe it.
	Yeah, because, well, anyway, you know what a Vortex is.
	Uh, what about a digital stopwatch?
	You know, measuring into the hundredths of a second, at least.
	You know, chunking that through.
	Uh... Oh, uh, there's an interesting idea.
	He, uh, thank you, sir.
	He's saying throwing a stopwatch through.
	Now that is interesting, uh, Michael.
	Because if the stopwatch made it out the other side... You know, none of the electronics are getting destroyed.
	And there had been, uh... Well, even if it's mechanical.
	Yeah.
	Of course, then it would be a subject for a mechanical field, probably stop it cold.
	But if you could get one through, it might provide you with an idea of whether it actually went through a time distortion.
	Yeah, like I said to him, like, have to keep one through the other one at the exact same time.
	That's good, Michael.
	Yeah.
	Very good.
	Stay right where you are.
	We'll be right back with you.
	Michael Markham, Madman Michael Markham is my guest.
	We'll be right back.
	Alright, back to Michael Markham.
	Michael, were you surprised to hear from your arresting officer?
	Yeah.
	Me too.
	It was quite a coincidence.
	He's apparently following your case, Michael.
	Does that make you nervous?
	In other words, he knows where you are now, doesn't he?
	I don't know if he does or not.
	I think he does.
	I don't know if he knows the exact house I'm in, but I think he knows I'm at St.
	Joseph's.
	Alright, let's see what we've got out there.
	Are you used to the Rockies?
	You're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Yeah, I gotta get my radio out.
	Alright, turn it off.
	I'm gonna turn it off.
	Just give me a chance.
	Alright.
	I got it.
	It's gone.
	Good.
	Okay.
	Where are you calling from, sir?
	I'm calling from Leavenworth, Kansas.
	Leavenworth, all right.
	Yes, sir.
	I would like to say that your guest, I think, is just a little bit nuts.
	He's probably as nutty as I am.
	I would like to make a comment.
	As far as what he's doing, I think he's on the right track, but you being a ham radio operator, that's what I am, you have to understand that you also have to Have a transmitter and a receiver.
	Do you kind of get what I'm getting at now?
	Well, I guess the Jacob's Ladder may have been a crude transmitter and receiver in a sense.
	In other words, wait a minute sir, he was propagating this voltage across those two rods and it may have been a kind of a blunderbuss way of going about it, but I can understand that he might achieve the effect he thinks he did.
	Well, you had a gentleman on one night that was explaining theories with Nikolai Tesla.
	Yes.
	Okay, and I've studied Tesla in depth.
	I've been studying Tesla for a good 25 years, and I'd like to ask your guest a question.
	Where did he come up with this idea that he would use high voltage?
	All right, it's a good question.
	Where did he?
	You mean for the time machine deal?
	Yeah.
	Well, like I said before, I didn't set out to build the time machine.
	As is so many times the case with any discovery, you were simply trying to build a Jacob's Ladder.
	Yeah, just like something fancy to watch.
	Just to see the spark go up.
	Something cool to do.
	Look, I understand that perfectly.
	Believe me, I understand that.
	And an unexpected effect occurred.
	These things happen.
	First time caller line, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Oh, hello, Art.
	Hello.
	This is Chuck in Redmond, Washington.
	Yes, Chuck.
	I just wanted to call, and I'm so glad I got through tonight.
	Because people like us that are messing around with this kind of thing, we've got to kind of stick together.
	Oh, you're another one, are you?
	Well, a little bit.
	Mostly my friends, that sort of thing.
	I got into it about three years ago, started collecting information.
	I've got a bulletin board, computer bulletin board service, where I try to get all this stuff together and get people to talk about it.
	Because I ran into a buddy who originally had taken, he was using a lot less voltage, but he was just using DC batteries, made a couple of coils, and was using a police radio, that he would key, well, excuse me, a ham radio, a handheld, and he would key it, and then tweak through the frequencies, and I guess he hit the resonant frequency of the circuit, and to cut a long story short, he ended up in the loony bin for a little while, and he's okay now, but I went down and snuck a tape recorder in to interview him and I got it all on tape.
	About an hour's worth of conversation.
	He was telling me all about his time travels and how he'd gone through this portal and that portal and had to go through 12 worlds to get back.
	Quite frankly, I thought he'd lost it.
	I'm not even sure now, but that was kind of interesting.
	So I did more research and then I presented it to another buddy of mine who fools around with electronics like I do.
	I said, hey, what do you think of this?
	Well, at first he stopped, and then he looked down and he goes, well, I can see how you get some kind of interesting effect out of that.
	And then about two weeks later, he kind of came up to me, well, he came up to me and he was kind of pale on the face, and he said, wow, one of the engineers upstairs at where I work, which is where they manufacture medical equipment, said that he had taken two four-foot square capacitors out of an x-ray machine and hooked them up to a short length of 12-gauge wire.
	You know, that's very thick wire for somebody who wouldn't know.
	Well, that's something, and it's yet another effect.
	in it and he pushed the the conductors together the electrodes together until I
	got close enough to arc I don't know want to know how he did that and
	apparently after the spark it disintegrated the 12 gauge wire and the
	quarter was reduced to the size of a dime but a quarter inch thick and
	apparently still in good shape well that's something and it's another yet
	another effect in the case of Michael's experiment the screw disappeared and
	then reappeared oh
	you you
	you Subscribe now by calling toll free 1-888-727-5505.
	Thanks for watching.
	Please subscribe.
	Tonight's program is a rebroadcast from April 18th, 1995.
	nineteen ninety-five here again i am my guest is michael markham
	he's too young to call him father time so we're calling a madman
	Here are a couple of faxes in on the subject.
	Art, no.
	I don't think you'd juice this one up.
	Well done.
	What a scoop.
	What tremendous bloodhound intuitive tenacity.
	You're one in a million, as is young Michael.
	I predict a great future for him if he doesn't blow himself up or get lynched first.
	I can just see the light pouring out from the cracks in the porch.
	Art, help him find a mentor quickly.
	And then, like he needs encouragement, get this.
	Art, we've done what we estimated to be a 30 kilowatt version of what Michael did.
	However, we did not see the time travel application.
	But, if he needs transformers, we've got them!
	As leftovers from our electrical business.
	Free, if he wants.
	He provides shipping.
	I'm sure, like us, there are many people that have more than what he needs for experimenting.
	He's really talking small-scale power.
	100 kilowatts is just medium power level.
	I cannot suggest that it be done within the city limits, however.
	People are not very technically tolerant around here either.
	Randy, listening to Kogo in San Diego.
	So, Michael, there you have it.
	It is a free offer of Of that which put you behind bars, this guy's willing to give you Transformers.
	Cool, huh?
	Yeah, very.
	So, is that something you might go for?
	Oh, yeah.
	Alright, well I can put you two together.
	I've got Randy's number here in San Diego and I'll give it to you privately tomorrow.
	How's that?
	Okay.
	I don't want to be arrested for being part of this.
	Nevertheless, it's a good offer.
	How do you feel about The possibility, Michael, of somebody coming along and being your mentor even more than this, maybe contributing money to build a great big gigantic version.
	Oh, that'd be great.
	That'd be like a dream come true.
	So you'd go for it, huh?
	Oh, yeah.
	Set up a lab somewhere and go for the really big voltage and really big current and... Boy.
	All right.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael.
	Hi.
	Hi.
	I'm calling from Medford, Oregon.
	Medford, K-O-P-E country.
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah, I was just wondering what makes you think it's a time machine and not some sort of thing like Star Trek beaming from one point to another?
	That's a good question.
	Yeah, what makes you think you're on the track of time here?
	Michael, it disappeared.
	The question is where to go and for how long?
	Uh, that's like, well, before my laser burn-up, that's, uh, pretty much, uh, this other side, I had to go by what I saw.
	So, right now, it could be, it's like, uh, it could be several things.
	Like, it could've been, like, uh, it could've went through time, it could've went through, like, uh, something like the Philadelphia Experiment, like, uh, I'll say this much, Michael.
	All kidding aside, you know, I think that if I had done what you've done, and I'm the kind of person who would likely do that, I disassembled all my mom's appliances when I was about eight or nine years old.
	Yeah.
	And I'm a big experimenter, so if I'd noticed an effect like that, I'd be on it too, like Lou, and I'd keep going.
	I mean, who cares what people say, right?
	Yeah.
	Is that your attitude?
	Yeah, pretty much.
	Everybody's got their opinion.
	Yeah, they sure do.
	And here's another one for you.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hi.
	Hello, this is Christoph from Kansas City.
	Yes, sir.
	Right near Michael's home.
	Yeah, right there.
	My question would be, I would like to know if you guys would expose a little more technical aspects, such as which direction in time he might be going.
	If indeed he did get to a point where he himself could step through it, how would you be sure that he could get back from which direction he went?
	That's an interesting question.
	Um, although the screw came back and he was going to try, I think you said an orange next?
	Or something like that.
	Yeah.
	And see if it came back intact.
	And then maybe a kitty cat.
	And then maybe Michael.
	Would you, I'm curious Michael, would you have stepped in yourself, or would you, if you got to that point, or would you have looked for a volunteer?
	Uh, well, if I looked for a volunteer and he didn't make it back, I'd be, I'd make me guilty of murder.
	I had like 60 days in jail, and that was plenty enough for me.
	So you wouldn't want to be on trial like OJ?
	No.
	Of course, they wouldn't have a body.
	Yeah, that's true, but... Heck, I don't know.
	So you would have done it yourself, then?
	Yeah.
	I still felt, if I wasn't, like, legally, if I wasn't found guilty of anything, I still wouldn't like anybody to do that.
	Okay.
	Wild Card Line, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hi.
	Hi there.
	Yeah, I've got two or three questions for Michael.
	Very, very interesting program.
	This is John from Reno.
	Yes, John.
	It's a great program.
	Did he have any Tesla research information before he started this?
	That's a good point.
	Have you looked into Tesla at all, Michael?
	Yeah, science in general is like really, I don't know, I guess you could call that my hobby.
	I read all sorts of books.
	Let's see, I've read Tesla.
	Right now I'm reading... There's this book, I forget who it's by, but it's like the String Theory of the Universe, so... Right.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	Well, how about the Uphill Lobby Experiment?
	You checked that one out too?
	It's, like, real hard to find information on that in libraries, so I'd like... I've got, like, this past...
	Michael, let me add something here.
	who just a few days ago found out information on that, information on the Montauk project,
	which is a spinoff of the Philadelphia experiment.
	Michael, let me add something here.
	Michael, we did a program with one of the people involved in the Philadelphia experiment.
	And Michael, he gave all the technical details of exactly how they did it in the program.
	What was it?
	Was that guy Al Belick?
	Al Belick.
	I'm trying to get in touch with that guy.
	I can get in touch with Mr. Belick and what I'm telling you though is we did a program with him in which he gave the exact technical details.
	The RF field and the electrical field that they used, the intensities, the power, the whole thing.
	Yeah.
	And you might want to get a copy of that program.
	It's the only I'll tell you how to get that, all right?
	Or maybe I'll even have it sent to you.
	On the east of the Rockies line, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Yeah, you got Ray from Fargo, Missouri.
	Hi, Ray.
	Yes, my cousin just called me.
	He called you from Leavenworth, Kansas.
	Oh, yes.
	Yes, he didn't hear the answer to the question on the high voltage.
	And he was just wondering, uh, you know, he didn't hear the answer because he hadn't turned his radio off and he called me and said he's only allowed one call a night.
	That's a true statement.
	So, uh, he would like to hear that.
	And, uh, well, all right.
	Rephrase the question then for us.
	Well, he, he, I'm not sure exactly what he asked.
	He just said that he asked a question about the high voltage, something about where'd he get the information for that.
	And I think that, uh, you know, uh, I've been listening, and it's amazing about the way that works.
	You know, and I'd like to hear the answer, and if you would give me a few seconds to go and shut my radio off.
	All right, well, I'm not exactly sure how to respond to it.
	Do you remember the original question, Michael?
	Something about the high voltage?
	Yeah.
	I'm not sure.
	We went through it, and Michael explained how he built the first transformer, and then how he obtained the following transformers.
	And, uh, so I'm not sure exactly what... Like, uh, like, uh, like, uh, like, uh, like, uh, like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, So, you knew, you just, it was the scale of the thing.
	Yeah.
	Alright, West of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hi.
	Yes, this is Cliff from North Bend.
	Hi, Cliff.
	How are you doing, Art?
	Just fine.
	Hey, this gentleman, he's, he is really on the baller, to me, isn't he?
	Well, see, he's either that, or according to a young lady who called, uh, he's like a terrorist and, uh, we're, we're like helping him out spreading the information.
	I admire him.
	I'm about twice his age.
	I'm sorry, Michael, what did you say?
	That one was like as if I wrote the Anarchist Cookbook or something.
	Yeah, that's exactly right, the Anarchist Cookbook.
	Any questions for him, sir?
	Yes, I would like to exchange some correspondence with him as I'm working with Mark on, I'm trying to think of the last Hendershot.
	uh... three power and and it just a practice crazy all right i'll tell you
	what all the places guys age
	why couldn't we uh... make it stop power
	all right uh... all right uh... on that note uh... listen uh...
	michael on there are a number of people a lot of them actually i'm sure would
	like to contact you uh... is there a way they can do that
	Now, you be careful, because this is a big radio program, Michael, and there's a lot of people out there.
	Yeah.
	Uh, do you want to hear from anybody who would like to help you out, or, uh... Sure.
	...correspond with you?
	Uh, how would they do that?
	Uh, well... You can either give out an address or a phone number.
	It's up to you.
	Well, hmm.
	I guess I don't, uh, see.
	Think about it.
	Yeah.
	Uh, yeah.
	I don't think they're all going to come at once.
	I have 10,000 people come to my house at once.
	I don't think that's going to happen.
	Well, I wouldn't rule it out.
	Yeah.
	That'd be a heck of a sight.
	Maybe rather than giving out your address, Michael, you'd like to think about giving out your phone number or not.
	Well, it's already published in the phone book, so might as well.
	All right.
	What is your phone number, Michael?
	It's 816-232.
	Right.
	4-0-1-9.
	Alright, let me give it again.
	8-1-6-2-3-2-4-0-1-9.
	Alright, we've got just a little more time here.
	So, on the wildcard line, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Hey there, Michael.
	How's it going?
	Pretty good.
	Yeah, this is Will in Spokane.
	The original, I think, mad scientist when I was probably about four years old.
	Incredible.
	Incredible idea that you have.
	Um, what was your education?
	Uh... I was in, uh, about two years ago.
	I was, uh... Oh, actually, it was from November 91.
	About a year and a half later, I was, like, majoring in electrical engineering.
	Oh, major.
	Jesus, you're only 21.
	Yeah.
	Wow.
	Wow.
	I, like, graduated when I was 17.
	So, what would you recommend to Michael?
	Would you say, keep going, uh, or...
	Stop now.
	I'd say, uh, get in touch with me.
	That's what I'd say, and continue on.
	Alright, well, you've got Michael's number.
	Actually, uh, I don't.
	Alright, I'll give it to you now.
	You want it?
	Yeah, I do.
	Zero code, uh, 816.
	816, uh-huh.
	232.
	232, uh-huh.
	eight one six uh... two three two two three two four zero one nine
	4019.
	4019.
	four zero one nine okay my name's will and maybe i'll give you a call
	okay alright there you have it west of the rockies you're on the air with
	michael markham good morning well good morning i think i'm gonna go out play
	the lotto now Oh, fuck.
	Hey, listen, I've really enjoyed this show.
	That woman that called in a couple of the people, a couple of the naysayers that have called up I'm going to have to say they're all but persistent.
	This has got to be the funnest show you've ever done.
	Anywhere from getting this guy after I heard the story initially last night on your show, and then this morning, and then the police officer calling up.
	This has got to be the greatest show that I have heard in a long time.
	I want to know, though, is... Mike, are you going to be publishing?
	Oh, that's a good question.
	write a book? Yeah. A book or some sort of a technical manual or something like that,
	well, a theory manual. Alright, there you go. Well, Hector's, if I, I mean, there's
	all sorts of books out there, like, on this subject, so, I don't know. That's like, remains
	to be seen.
	Maybe if you, on a larger scale, get to try the experiment.
	Yeah, it's another thing, too.
	If I get this thing and it actually works, heck, I could write a book, do a movie, and do all kinds of stuff in.
	And hopefully tell us whether it was a lone gunman or not.
	Yeah, that's another thing I'd like to do, too.
	Really, this may sound like a joke, but heck, I'd like to go back to you really killing Nicole Simpson, but that's another thing.
	Well, I guess that would be a laudable use of it, and maybe we could cut this whole damn trial thing short, Michael.
	Yeah, that's all I'm saying.
	All right, hold on just a moment.
	We'll be right back to you.
	Alright Michael, I'd like your reaction to this.
	Art, thanks so much.
	I've really been tiring of hearing all the crap that's going on in the world.
	The dollar-yen crisis, the Iran-Russia-China nuclear crisis, everything in the U.S.
	is in crisis, the O.J.
	crisis.
	It's refreshing not to have to listen to any of it at 11 o'clock tonight.
	No, instead you've chosen to share with all of us someone near Kansas City, my hometown, who is either truly on the cutting edge Or merely yet another deranged madman.
	I frankly don't care if he is.
	It's just so nice to hear the tale of somebody's courage in following their intuition and going for their dream.
	Thank you, Waldo and Tehachapi.
	There you are.
	You're not a deranged madman, are you, Michael?
	No.
	No?
	How would you describe yourself?
	Well, I have my strange experiments, basically.
	Just like anybody else.
	Well, I don't know about it just like anybody else.
	Well, that's why I think so.
	To you, you're normal.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Yeah, I was interested in talking to Mike about possibly publishing, as one of your last scholars said.
	Publishing information.
	I'm a computer junkie, basically.
	My name's David.
	I'm from Houston.
	So you'd like to interview him?
	What I'd like is, if he ever does go to the whole publishing stage, is to see if I could get him to send me the information on, you know, what the outcome is.
	Maybe not exactly what he's doing, because, of course, he might want to keep that to himself, but... Or keep other people from trying it, but... Basically, get an overview of, you know, what type of information he's dealing with, what he's doing, what the outcome is, and possibly show it to the public to see if they like it at all.
	Alright, and that winds into an earlier call.
	Thank you.
	We will give Michael's number one more time here.
	You're going to be on the phone a lot, Michael.
	Michael, are you taking notes?
	I mean, are there any notes so that if you stepped into the gap and turned into a french fry, that people could read and see where you went wrong, maybe?
	Yeah, overall, like a general... I don't like writing down every little thing, but I like keeping a general idea down.
	Okay.
	We've got so many calls.
	East of the Rockies, where are you calling from, please?
	In Kansas City.
	Kansas City!
	Good morning, how are you?
	Fine.
	Mark is just north of me in St.
	Joseph.
	I'm down here in Independence.
	That's right.
	And by the way, I have to echo the last caller.
	That's a refreshing difference from the stock market report.
	There you go.
	For which we have no control.
	Mark, I need to ask you something.
	It's Michael.
	Michael, rather.
	Michael?
	Yeah.
	When you approach the day when you build the quote-unquote arc of triumph, Give me a call because I want to make sure I plug in my surge suppressor first, okay?
	Love you guys.
	All right, thank you.
	So he's worried about the appliances there in Kansas City.
	Is there a way you can somehow protect the local area of the power grid that next time you do this, Michael?
	Well, back in my...
	Have the power company put a bigger transformer on the pole.
	That way it won't overload it.
	That's an idea.
	Yeah.
	From now on, I bet anybody in the Kansas City area, when they see their lights dim, they're going to wonder if you just jumped across.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air with Michael Markham.
	Yes.
	I would like to know if your guest has great knowledge of time travel.
	Great knowledge of time travel?
	Yes.
	do you uh... have great knowledge of time travel great knowledge uh...
	uh... some knowledge and character
	like that i think i have to like that's what i'm doing now i mean after all
	nobody has real
	publishable knowledge of time travel We're off into an area here that just isn't much known.
	Well, yeah.
	It's like right now, it's like trees.
	It's the same thing as UFOs and stuff like that.
	Sure.
	Sure, absolutely.
	Wildcard Line, real quickly with Michael Markham.
	Hello.
	Hi, Mike.
	And Art, this is fantastic.
	Mike, can I ask you a question?
	Yes.
	Have you ever listened to the Art Bell Show before?
	Well, okay.
	I just want to let you know.
	There's nothing but a bunch of wackos out here that listen to Art Bell all the time, and we really appreciate a guy like you.
	Let me say this.
	Gee, do me some more favors, sir.
	Let me say this.
	Mike, there was a guy, he's a cosmologist, an astrophysicist.
	His name is Rick Thorne, and he's into what is called wormholes.
	Oh yeah, it's kind of like similar to a black hole.
	Exactly.
	Yeah.
	And what he liked to talk about, and this is also very fascinating, it also has to do with time travel.
	Now, when you step in one end of the wormhole, it has to do with the speed of light and the space-time continuum.
	All right, we're about out of time here.
	Okay, well he says, when you're coming back out the other way, you meet yourself.
	Now, I also wondered, if you threw the screw in, did you take a look at the screw if it was turned left or right-handed, Fred, when you found it?
	Ooh.
	Interesting questions.
	Yeah.
	Keep it up, Mike.
	All right, Michael.
	We're out of time.
	It has been a great pleasure.
	And yes, we do very unusual, kooky things on the show every now and then.
	But Michael, on the serious side, I admire you on a lot of levels.
	I really do.
	Not the stealing of the Transformers, but what you're doing and what you're trying to do.
	And I really appreciate your coming on the program.
	And we'll get your number out one more time.
	You're going to hear from a lot of people now, Michael.
	Okay?
	You take care, my friend.
	All right.
	Take care.
	That's it.
	we'll be back in a moment
	I'm not going to be a fool I'm not going to be a fool
	I am with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18, 1995.
	Please do not call.
	Well, it sure is.
	Hi, everybody.
	Welcome into the program.
	I'm going to start with a short open now.
	If you just are tuning in, we spent the last two hours... How do I explain what we just have done?
	If you're just tuning in, you'll never understand.
	I read a story last week about a Kansas City man Uh, who tried to build a time machine on his porch.
	I tracked him down.
	Heh heh, I mean, I tracked him down.
	And, uh, he went on the air with me tonight, and it was the most incredible two hours you've ever heard.
	He explained exactly, uh, what he did, why he got in trouble for stealing the Transformers from the power company.
	Uh, how his experiments, uh, proceeded, he actually caused something to disappear and reappear, possibly moving in time or dimension.
	And, uh, the arresting officer in the case called up during the course of the interview.
	It was just absolutely incredible.
	So, uh, it's hard.
	The man's name is Michael Markham.
	And I said I'd give his phone number out one more time.
	He okayed that.
	He'll be sorry.
	Y'all know about the C-21 mystery.
	Eight men dead when an Air Force Learjet went down in Alabama.
	Nobody knows quite what brought it down.
	It was completely destroyed, but they did get the black box, the flight recorder, so we may be able to find out.
	Killed Air Force Assistant Secretary Clark Feaster and Air Force Major General Glenn Proffitt.
	Among those killed.
	A possible cause they're toying with is a fuel imbalance.
	In other words, the Lear has fuel stored in the wings, and if you get too much of an imbalance, obviously you can't fly.
	We'll find out.
	Economic news.
	Housing starts are down about 8%.
	Down in the West as much as 20%.
	Down despite falling mortgage rates.
	Signs are that the housing market will continue to fall.
	Now I've got all kinds of news about the dollar.
	We've got a serious problem here, folks, so let me read you a couple of faxes.
	Art, the U.S.
	economy, as well as the world monetary system, is in serious jeopardy.
	The dollar is collapsing and rapidly losing its status as the world's premier currency.
	I've included a copy of a record-breaking drop it took on the overseas market this evening when it plummeted to an incredible 1.345 marks to the dollar and an astounding 79.7 yen.
	When will the American people wake up and take notice of what's happening?
	Will they wait until it is completely collapsed under the tremendous burden it now shoulders?
	Or will it be when the value of the dollar is measured by its weight rather than its denominational value?
	When the day comes that a $100 bill only puts a couple of gallons of gas in one's car, it's going to be too late.
	Something must be done now.
	The crash of the dollar is not some futuristic event.
	It's taking place right this moment.
	Indeed, Tokyo, the Associated Press.
	The dollar fell to a new low against the Japanese yen in early trading Wednesday, following a decline overseas due in part to pessimism with regard to talks between the U.S.
	and Japan.
	Tokyo stock prices nosedived.
	The dollar fell to 79.75 yen from 81.12 late Tuesday.
	It did climb back to 80.08 yen.
	My God, it's the lowest dollar-yen rate since the modern exchange rate system was set up in the late 1940s.
	My.
	NBC did a piece last night on sexual harassment.
	What is sexual harassment?
	Who knows?
	I used to think that it meant that you were grabbing at a female or you were being sexually aggressive in some unwanted, unwelcome way.
	I always thought that was sexual harassment.
	Anyway, whatever it is, since Anita accused Clarence, the number of sexual harassment complaints uh... to government agencies has risen get ready for this now one hundred and nine percent a hundred and nine percent so far twenty two million dollars has been paid in claims there is a los angeles fire captain steve johnson who was challenging a policy in his fire department apparently
	Which says that he's not even allowed to have a Playboy magazine at the fire station.
	Apparently, these days, one can be charged with sexual harassment for looking at a woman.
	And I think we've gone too far.
	This is really pathetic and sad.
	I mean, look.
	Women, to me, are beautiful creatures.
	And if there's one nearby and there's something to be seen, I do not now know the harm in looking.
	I've never known the harm in looking.
	And if you can actually be charged with sexual harassment for merely looking... Well, I don't know.
	America's turning into a different kind of place.
	What has happened to sexuality and the relationship between men and women?
	Is it now just going to be a matter for court?
	And for challenge?
	And for... I just, I think we're ruining it.
	This great thing, this relationship between men and women, we are ruining it, and I'm not happy about that.
	I should tell you I'm not happy.
	And I wonder if you feel the same way, or do you think they're on the right track, and that people should absolutely have their distance and their space, And that women should not expect to be looked at?
	Is that where we want the relationship between men and women in this country to be going?
	I don't think so.
	So...
	Let's see...
	Still reacting to McNamara.
	A lot of people are.
	Art, I agree with you about McNamara.
	Do you think he wrote the book to tell his story or to earn more big money?
	I'd feel better if he donated the proceeds to a veterans organization.
	I believe Charleston, South Carolina, by the way, suffered major damage from an earthquake sometime back in the mid-19th century.
	Enjoy the show.
	You're fair and reasonable.
	Longboat Key, Florida.
	Wow, down in the Florida Keys.
	Longboat Key, Florida.
	I've always looked at the Keys as a wonderful place to be.
	It's beautiful there.
	And then this, and then we'll get the phone lines open.
	Aren't you a great show?
	All right, this country has to legalize drugs, whether we like it or not.
	The present situation is not tolerable.
	The arguments now are the same as were used during Prohibition.
	As it was then necessary to legalize alcohol in order to control the rum runners, it's now necessary to take drug money out of the hands of the dope gangs.
	This is the major issue, though there are many others involved.
	Many people think this problem is unique to modern-day America, but it's occurred throughout history and the world.
	Anybody who is generally concerned with this topic ought to take the time to read The Forbidden Game, A Social History of Drugs.
	It is a scholarly work that provides much thought-provoking information.
	As a true believer in Republican government, I can see no other course but legalization.
	People must be allowed to injure themselves if they wish to.
	Of course, they should also be absolutely responsible for their actions and left in their own mess, as it were.
	Government must get out of the business of protecting people against themselves.
	It makes us lazy, docile, and atrophies the reason.
	Freedom and responsibility are two sides of the same coin, and if the American people don't realize it, they're going to lose both.
	That's Mark from Clackamas, Oregon, and I thought it was a profound argument for legalization, and there are reasons to argue for it as well as against it.
	All right, we're going to open the lines now.
	If you want to comment on the show we had on between 11 and 1 Pacific Time, the first two hours of the program, you're welcome to do it.
	Time travel, what Madman Markham is doing, has done, plans to do, you're welcome to comment on that, or anything I just brought up, or anything that you would like to bring up at all.
	and I would like to say once again to everybody that in my estimation talk radio is many things it's not just politics it's not just at least to me it's not it's my style of talk radio and uh... you will hear me do many many different things on this program i'm convinced over the years that uh... that has contributed to and is part of the reason for its success it sometimes uh... upsets people But in my estimation, if you make no waves, then you're not really doing anything at all.
	So I will continue to do what some people think of as a little more than passing strange every now and then.
	It's just me, folks.
	On the first time caller line, you are on the air.
	Hi, I'm an air traffic controller out of Salt Lake City.
	Okay, would you turn your radio off, please?
	Certainly.
	Thank you.
	And an air traffic controller.
	Yeah, referenced earlier in your broadcast, you mentioned the Republicans' contract with America.
	Yes.
	And there's currently a couple of issues that I'm concerned about.
	One is the attack on the federal retirement system.
	Oh, yes.
	This is going to cost me a heck of a lot out of my pocket.
	We're looking at about $1,500 to $2,000 a year on that, plus increased health care.
	They're attacking my differential pay for being an air traffic controller, which was meant to revitalize the air traffic control field.
	Unfortunately on this, I think they're overlooking the fact that there is a lot of waste.
	I don't suppose they hang portraits of Ronald Reagan up in the air traffic control area, do they?
	No, no, they certainly don't.
	You know, and also this attack on federal retirement, it concerns us because this Attack, as I call it, will send a signal to the rest of America, corporate America, to slash the retirement benefits that our workers have struggled so long and so hard to get.
	I do agree that the process is underway.
	Right.
	And ultimately it's going to probably include Social Security as well, so everybody's at risk here.
	You know, either we get it together or just about everything's at risk.
	Well, you know, and federal employees have been taking a hit for a long time.
	You know, as far as being unprofessional, unserviceable, and things of that nature.
	But unfortunately, you know, the airplanes fly through the sky safely, and no matter what you say about the post office, that mail does get delivered sooner or later.
	Well, sooner or later is the key phrase.
	The key phrase, but I mean, you know, overall, for 32 cents, we're not doing too bad to mail a letter.
	You know, something I want to ask you about, actually a couple things, as an air traffic controller, You know, in the post office, you mentioned it, we all know, they've had some people go kind of crazy.
	Yeah.
	And shoot people.
	Now, that was because, it said, of the pressure in the post office.
	Wait, let me finish.
	If there's any place that may have more pressure than a post office, it would be your job.
	Right.
	And yet, I don't know of any air traffic controllers that have gone bonkers and grabbed a gun.
	Any thoughts on that?
	No, they haven't.
	A lot of the problems in the Post Office are related to the supervision of their employees.
	From what I understand, the employees felt they were being harassed, being watched too closely.
	Also, at one time in the Post Service, they had one supervisor for every two employees.
	That started to reverse the trend on Al Gore's reduction in government, the elimination of 252,000 jobs, and the supervisor-to-employee ratio of 15 to 1.
	Well, that's a good answer.
	Alright, one more question, then I'm going to go.
	I take it as an air traffic controller.
	You can read the transponder signals of aircraft.
	It's a good, clear way to read what's out there.
	That is correct.
	But you also have a real radar capability, do you not?
	Yes, we do.
	It's the echo return off that.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Echo return.
	So, my question is, how many times as an air traffic controller would you admit to have been tracking some sort of UFO, something that is traveling in the sky that you cannot account for?
	Well, there's a lot of times out there.
	On the radar now we have what they call, what the government alludes to, false targets.
	And they say it's a radar glitch and a radar problem.
	Well, I think that these radar glitches may be something else out there.
	I don't know.
	We have too many of them to account for.
	Well, I'm sure, and I guess you can be fooled, but over the years you've kind of learned to recognize a real return, don't you?
	Uh, yeah, but just by their track and their movement.
	I've seen some suspicious things.
	In fact, we have a UFO hotline number up that we do call.
	But most controllers do not do that because then we may be, if we report that, we may be subject to some government testing.
	Really?
	That they don't want to admit to, so we generally don't call and report it.
	Uh, you know, that's... You know, if you report this... That's exactly what I suspected, sir.
	Yeah.
	I really... Well, I don't do it.
	Uh, in other words, do you want to report one of them things?
	No, absolutely not.
	Absolutely not.
	Maybe I'll report it to his office next week, and then I'm out of a job.
	Oh, believe me, I understand.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Good morning, Art.
	Good morning.
	Hey, um, did you hear anything about the, uh, cattle guard incident with Bill Clinton?
	Channel guard?
	Yeah.
	What is that?
	Do you know what a cattle guard is?
	Oh, a cattle guard.
	Uh, yeah, I know what a cattle guard is, sure.
	Well, it seems that a report came out of Colorado.
	You mean he was unable to cross one?
	Yeah, go ahead.
	I'm sorry.
	God, that was awful.
	Finish your story.
	He saw this report, or one of his cohorts saw this report, that there was over 100,000 cattle guards.
	In Colorado.
	Yes, sir.
	Okay.
	Well, he said, well, that's too many people to employ, so we have to get rid of these cattle guards.
	Which is funny by itself.
	Patsy Schroeder picked it up and said, well, we can't fire all those cattle guards.
	We have to put them in some type of work training program.
	This is real, Art.
	No, I believe you, sir.
	I believe you.
	I believe you.
	Where will it all end?
	It's a wonderful world.
	Have a good morning.
	I must go.
	Thank you.
	That's too many cattle guards on the payroll.
	Wild Card Line, you're on the air.
	Hello.
	Good morning, Mr. Bell.
	It's Leonard from South Dakota country.
	As usual, your program is most educational.
	I learned the difference between a cattle guard and a cattle guard this morning.
	Yes.
	And I also learned the difference between... I think the President did, too.
	Learn the difference between those people who are scared to death and those people who have perfect peace.
	You heard about that sect that thought the world was coming to the end?
	Yes.
	Well, there's nothing more devastating than to think that the earth is going to pieces out from under your feet.
	But the Christian reads the Bible and says that, well, there's a thousand years, at least a millennium ahead of us, so we don't have to worry about the end of the world for a thousand years.
	You know something I've always wondered about, Leonard?
	Whether it's the religious people like yourself.
	Or it's a psychic predicting the end of the world, or, you know, a gigantic earthquake or something, and they do it, and they talk about it, and they think about it, and they dwell on it, and they cogitate about it, and then the day comes, and it doesn't happen?
	Do they feel disappointed?
	Perfect peace have they which love thy law, and nothing shall offend them.
	All right, well, we'll leave them with that thought.
	East of the Rockies, you are on the air.
	Good morning.
	Hey, Art.
	How you doing?
	Okay.
	Hey, I really enjoyed the change of pace in your show, and I feel like everybody needs to kind of let loose a little bit.
	Every now and then.
	Every now and then.
	Hey, I want to say something to Mr. Markham.
	If he's still listening, I don't know if he is, but there's a lot of people laughing at him right now, but remember, sir, they laughed at Edison.
	They laughed at Leonardo da Vinci, and they laughed at the Wright brothers.
	Isn't that the truth?
	That is the truth.
	So he needs to keep it up and just be careful.
	And the young man really does have a brilliant mind, even though he may be on the edge of being a little too smart for his own good, let's say.
	Well, that's better than madness.
	I don't think he's mad.
	Obviously, he's intelligent enough to understand what he's getting into.
	And I think that's all that counts.
	I kind of like the guy.
	Yeah, he sounds like he'd be a fun person to hang out with at a distance.
	Did you hear when the arresting officer called?
	Yes, sir, I did.
	If you listen between the lines, that officer seemed to be saying, think about it, don't do it, don't you do it.
	Yeah, he did.
	But then again, he seemed to be almost commending him for Having the chutzpah to actually do that, you know what I mean?
	Yeah, I do.
	Where are you calling from, sir?
	I'm calling from Austin, Texas.
	Austin, Texas.
	All right.
	Thank you very much.
	We'll be back everybody in just a moment.
	He's got the dream of advice and land He's gonna give up the booze and the one night stand
	And then he'll settle down in a quiet little town And forget about everything
	But you know he'll always keep moving No he's never gonna stop moving
	He's rolling, he's rolling on To access the audio archives of Coast to Coast AM, log on
	to coasttocoastam.com to access the audio archives of Coast to Coast AM, log on
	to coasttocoastam.com.
	Coast to Coast is a national park, and it's a place where you can see the world.
	I'm falling down the way too bad, I just can't win, yeah.
	Please God, see oh why, can I get him?
	I got a lot of those heartaches.
	I got a lot of those tears of heartache.
	Tears of heartache all the way, just in my heart, every day.
	Everywhere I hide, every day, yeah.
	Tears of heartache, tears of heartache all the way, just by the tears of it, yeah.
	Just to win, yeah.
	Please God, see oh why, can I get him?
	I got a lot of those heartaches.
	I got a lot of those tears of heartache.
	From the Kingdom of Nye, this is the best of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18th, 1995.
	Please do not pause.
	Um, to Art Bell.
	Art, did you notice that there were no women calling in on your interview with the time machine mechanic?
	Except women who thought he was a radical extremist or a madman?
	Does that tell you anything?
	Well, I don't know.
	I enjoyed listening to that kid.
	I'm 49, and laud him for trying things experimental.
	We still don't know the real effects of how electricity and radio waves affect the dimension we live in.
	It's pure theory, and for all we know, it may tamper with one of the other 13 dimensions suggested in Davy's Super Strings book, Good Show.
	What does it mean that women... Well, it was kind of a technical thing, and, you know, guys like that kind of thing, and women, some of them, are horrified by it.
	So, I think that's your answer.
	I don't know what it says, though.
	And then there's, Hi Art, I really like your guest tonight.
	I've always been a physics buff.
	One thing that bothers me about time travel, though, as a consequence of Einstein's theory of relativity, which stemmed from something called the Lorentz Transformations Mathematical Equations, which describe space and time dilations, a couple of things are apparent.
	One, in order to experience time dilation, One must reach the speed of light, at which point the person's momentum, and hence mass, become infinite.
	Two, the speed of light is an absolute maximum.
	It can't be exceeded.
	Not to say that these concepts from special relativity are absolute, but they do seem to preclude time travel, unless some grossly unobserved physical law exists.
	Time travel is a cool concept worth studying, but I'd love to hear from someone more educated in physics than myself comment on this.
	Tom, Columbia, Missouri.
	Well, I'm not sure of what I'm saying, but I believe that there was some theory, or even possible proof, that quarks have exceeded the speed of light, or a theory that they might exceed the speed of light, and I think that that's one of the things they were going to look at with the gigantic accelerator they were trying to build down in Texas, but I'm certainly not a physics person myself, so it's open for comment if anybody out there wants to comment.
	A little information on the Palmdale Bulge.
	It is an anomaly also known as an uplift.
	It is literally the ground surging upward.
	This particular uplift was discovered about 1980 and thought it was developed during the late 1960s or early 70s.
	But most seismologists agree that it has been rising continually ever since.
	Ooh, that's bad.
	That's Carol listening also to KFYI and MESA.
	So, Carol, I don't know what to tell you.
	To me, the layman in these areas, it seems like a Sort of like an aneurysm, as I said earlier, an earth aneurysm.
	Is that out of line?
	Here we go.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Hi, Art.
	How you doing?
	Just fine.
	This is Mike calling from TDY in Madison.
	Oh, Madison, Wisconsin.
	Yes, Mike.
	And, well, one quick question and then a longer one.
	Does your Milwaukee station, is that going to carry you all the way to the end of the program, because they chop you off for an hour here?
	Well, it's a matter of time zones, Mike.
	In other words, the program here on the Pacific Coast goes until 4 a.m.
	There it would be 6, and most radio stations begin their morning shows, wake-up shows around 5.
	So that's what happens.
	Yeah, it's kind of sad because I never know what's going on for that final period of time.
	Well, irrelevant.
	It's torture, I know.
	And I also wanted to mention, if your time traveler there ever does succeed, it would be nice if you could maybe throw a dollar bill through there to see what shape that comes back in.
	Maybe a little tiny, tiny one dollar bill.
	That would be frightening.
	It was a hell of a story, wasn't it?
	Oh, it was pretty interesting, pretty interesting.
	It's hard to believe.
	You know, I think it's more likely that it's creating an invisibility effect than time travel, though.
	Well, maybe.
	Either way, it'd be a big story.
	Yeah, well, speaking of other big stories, I got home today to a message on my answering machine, which was sort of chopped off because I have a really lame answering machine.
	It's from my friend in Arizona who works in parks and went camping with some geologists.
	Yes.
	He mentioned about the Palmdale Bulge.
	Apparently, they had a very spirited discussion about that, which I don't know what the Palmdale Bulge is.
	I was wondering if you knew.
	I'm not a geologist either, but it sounds bad, doesn't it?
	Well, yeah, it sounds like it.
	Evidently, it's something of great interest to them.
	I would think of it just off the cuff as sort of an earth aneurysm.
	I like that.
	I'll get back to you as soon as I find out anything more specific, and I'll see if maybe one of these geologists would be cuffed enough to get on the air with you.
	Oh, hey, listen, if you get one willing to go on, have them call me.
	They're notoriously closed-mouthed.
	I know.
	I know.
	They like to talk around campfires, but you get them in front of a microphone and they clam right up.
	That's right.
	All right, thanks a million.
	And have them fax me.
	My fax number is Area Code 702-727.
	8-4-9-9-7-0-2-7-2-7-8-4-9-9.
	And we have done one other thing that is really fun.
	And if you wish to partake, you're welcome to.
	I'm going to give you the number.
	We've got a whole bunch of pictures, GIF pictures.
	And if you've got an IBM compatible computer, you can get them.
	We've got them on a bulletin board and we're increasing.
	I'm going to send six more photographs up there tomorrow.
	Right now, we've got one of myself and my wife, one of just me, one of me in the Air Force 30 years ago.
	We have a ghost photograph available, and I'm going to be uploading a second ghost photograph.
	In color, by the way.
	Both of these are in color tomorrow.
	There is a color photograph of the studio that I'm broadcasting from right now in my home.
	Actually, a photograph of it up there.
	There are two photographs of Mexican UFOs, and this relates to last week's Dreamland program.
	We had a couple of researchers on who talked about the sightings in Mexico.
	It was very exciting.
	So we've got two Mexican photographs up there.
	We've got the Roswell movie photograph up there, the very controversial one.
	And as I said, we're going to put a half dozen more tomorrow.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Hello.
	Hello.
	Yes, sir.
	Who is this?
	Art Bell.
	Art Bell.
	How are you doing?
	You were talking about the palm oil bulge a minute ago.
	Yes, the earth aneurysm.
	Right.
	I'm calling from Pasadena, California, the home of Caltech.
	Oh, yes.
	I notice a lot.
	I drive by there every evening after I leave work.
	One thing I've noticed is from the University of Oregon, I think it is, they have geologist trucks down here, but they're volcanologists, and they have a little volcano on the side.
	Uh-huh.
	They always show up at 4.30 in the morning.
	Why 4.30 in the morning?
	You got me!
	Sounds... secretive.
	Yeah, well, another thing I heard, too, is out near Landers is the ground after the Landers earthquake was so hot you couldn't touch it.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Due to what?
	Um, gee, I don't know.
	Well, you have volcanologists out there now from Caltech coming down from Oregon.
	That's really odd.
	I know.
	It's really odd, too.
	I don't want to start a rumor, but... Yes, you do.
	That's what you're doing.
	You're starting a rumor.
	The Hot Earth Theory.
	Yeah, it could be.
	A week or so ago, I heard someone else talking about something similar to this.
	Really?
	Maybe it was over a week ago.
	Well, we had a call, a very troubling call, from a man who talked about Well levels and water tables.
	Maybe that's what it was.
	Rising, you remember that?
	Yeah, I think that's what it was.
	I tried to call you right after I heard that.
	There's a whole lot of geological rumor mongering going on and you know there's something to it.
	I think there's something to it.
	Thank you very much for the call.
	You know it's just sort of a collective input.
	I'm getting information and faxes you guys just flat wouldn't believe regarding people who think there are There's getting ready to be a geological upheaval of some sort.
	A lot of information, really.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Yes, this is Bill in San Antonio.
	Hi Bill.
	You, of course, are aware that the FCC limits the amount of fun you can have in a two-hour period?
	I don't know.
	I used to play a lot of electronic and electrical circuits.
	I used a lot of spark coils and did a lot of Jacob's letters type stuff.
	I enjoyed all that.
	That kind of thing really needs to be encouraged.
	It's not a really a madman type of thing.
	It's just a curiosity type thing that is really the basis of my life.
	I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm a fan of the word.
	I'm a fan of the word.
	That's one of the reasons I went for the interview.
	While we have the things that were developed, the technological things that we have today
	really came from that kind of curiosity.
	That's absolutely correct, and that's one of the reasons I went for the interview.
	I mean, there's just something about somebody like that.
	It isn't anything unusual.
	It's like one of your callers that came in and said, you know, a lot of wackos listen to your show.
	Well, you know, I'm one of those wackos.
	It's, you know, a financial analyst.
	But I grew up playing with that kind of stuff.
	And then you get interested.
	You investigate things.
	You want to see what happens.
	And you try things out.
	And, you know, maybe you don't ever find anything.
	But you check things out.
	Yes, sir.
	Thank you.
	Look, I'll say it again.
	That talk radio should be on the edge.
	God knows we're on the edge.
	It should be on the edge.
	I mean, that's what it's all about.
	We're not mainstream media.
	I don't want to be mainstream media.
	I don't want to be mainstream media.
	And there is more to life than politics.
	There are a million different areas and things that you can talk about, and I just as soon let this program, as I have for all the years I've been on the air, over, you know, going on a decade, about a decade, Doing this particular program, I've let it range wherever it's going to range.
	And I'm not going to change that.
	I don't care how big it gets.
	I'm not going to change that.
	I'm going to change that.
	You're on the air.
	Good morning.
	Hi, Art.
	How you doing?
	This is Clayton down in Laughlin.
	Hello, Clayton.
	I wanted to catch up with you and give you some food for thought.
	Okay.
	The quirk you were thinking about was the Tachyon.
	Oh, Tachyon.
	Tachyon.
	Tachyon.
	Very good.
	Moves faster than the speed of light, so therefore it's going backwards in time.
	Well, that's what the theory is, yes.
	Right.
	And what else am I going to remind you about the Montauk Project?
	Oh, indeed.
	Michael talked about that project, and I've had people on the air about that project.
	Look, I don't rule out what happened to Michael, you know, his story.
	I don't rule it out at all.
	It may have exactly happened as he said.
	Well, interesting enough about it is the aspect of having to use the psychic in order to actually kind of make things work.
	You know, using kind of like what they call amorphous resonance.
	Yeah.
	You know, what makes your nose your nose, what makes your eyes your eyes.
	These things come down in literal form, and supposedly that's why the Philadelphia Experiment worked so well, because everything was tubed, other than transistors, and had a natural resonance at that time.
	That is correct, yes.
	But nowadays they can digitally sample the resonance factors.
	It's a point well made, thank you.
	I was talking, I don't even know if I ought to say this, I was talking to a man up in Washington State earlier tonight, Who claims to be working with dual resonance technology, and claims to be able to move in time.
	But that's a story for another day.
	On the wildcard line, you're on the air.
	Good morning.
	Hey, Ari, what's up?
	Well, you are.
	You're up, sir.
	Where are you calling from?
	Kodiak, Alaska.
	Kodiak, Alaska.
	I was going to say, I'll bet you it's Kodiak, because we get this unusual delay when we talk to people there in Kodiak.
	Oh, that's weird.
	I haven't called in about a year and a half, so I don't know.
	Well, that's an even bigger delay.
	What's on your mind?
	I was just wondering about that time travel thing.
	I read an article in Discovery a while back.
	It talked about this concept of different universes, where when you travel in time, you don't actually travel in time, you just travel to a different universe.
	And every universe is just a different setup of each other.
	If I went back in time and killed my dad, you'd think I wouldn't be born, but actually I would have gone to a different universe, so in my own universe I'd still be alive.
	In that alternate universe, would your father also be alive?
	No, because I would have killed him.
	No, no, no, no, but you said you would then be in an alternate universe, and in that alternate universe, for you to exist, your dad would also have to exist.
	You would just sort of blow yourself out of it.
	But my other self, the alternate universe, would die, not me, because I'm from the other universe.
	All right, sir, thank you.
	It seems to me that, to be consistent, you would, in effect, when you killed your father, blow yourself out of this universe, find yourself in another universe where Your continuity can be accounted for.
	In other words, where your father still lives if he was supposed to be alive.
	And you could only exist there.
	Wildcard Line, you're on the air.
	Yeah, good morning.
	My goodness, I can't believe I got in.
	Yes, you have.
	Where are you?
	In Kansas City.
	Kansas City.
	Not far from Madman Markham.
	Right, except I woke up and he went off.
	Oh, that's too bad.
	You missed a good one.
	Yeah.
	You know, I was wondering, did you ever think that the space, you know, all the space that they do at NASA has changed what's going on with the earthquakes and the floodings and all that, and the pollution?
	I always thought that maybe that has a lot to do with the climate change and everything.
	Well, I had a lady who called up not long ago and thought that every time they fire off the shuttle, It's like firing it off from the center of a balloon, and when the shuttle goes through the balloon, a bunch of stuff blows out before the whole seals up.
	Right.
	Is that your kind of thinking?
	Well, years ago when I was in high school, our science teacher said that when you would put something through the stratosphere, that you would change the molecules, which would have a lot to do with Uh, the weather and what have you, and every time they go up, it seems that there is freak floods, freak earthquakes, and I really think that it has a lot to do with the ozone and everything else, because it's bound to have pollution from the fuel they use.
	Well, I guess there's that.
	I mean, who knows?
	There are people who believe that our moral behavior is causing this.
	There are people who believe it is the space shuttle?
	There are people who believe that it's an angry God shaking his finger at us?
	Well, you know what?
	Maybe it's a combination.
	Because it's like if God's saying, hey, don't come up here.
	You don't have any business down here.
	You can't even take care of what's down below.
	Why are you worrying about what's up here?
	Do you think God would say that?
	Some people would say, well, but God gave us the knowledge to do these things.
	But it seems to me like it's one place where the budget should be cut.
	I don't think they need to spend that much money on Nassau when they could take that same money and use it for research that Nassau, yes, they have come up with a lot of good things, but they should take that money and work on the good things that they've come up with and maybe use their knowledge To help people down here and not up there.
	Well, I know, but you've got Teflon pans.
	No, that's what I mean.
	They came up with some good things, but really, what are we doing now up there?
	What good is it?
	You know, I don't understand why they... Well, uh, communication satellites come to mind.
	I mean, there's a lot of technology.
	I mean, right now, you're able to get my voice because it's going up to a satellite that's distributing it throughout the whole country.
	This is true.
	Like I said, there's good, but I think there's also a lot of bad that it's causing.
	I really think it's causing the... Of course, depending on how you feel about my program, maybe you could say it's bad.
	No, I enjoy your program when I'm up!
	Well, I'm glad that you're up, and I'm glad that you called, and I really have to go because I've got a newscast coming.
	Okay.
	Alright, thank you very much for the call, and I guess that'll do it for this hour.
	They just, they just, they sort of fly by.
	Yeah, if you don't like the program, then you could say it's technology being used for evil.
	The evil distribution of a program teaching people about God knows what, arcs and time travel, and what's next?
	how to build a nuclear weapon 101.
	This part of the show...
	Listen online with Streamlink.
	log on to coast to coast am dot com yeah
	yeah yeah
	Make it happen Oh
	Tonight we'll put all of our things aside.
	Give in this time and show me some affection.
	We're going for those pleasures in the night.
	I want to love you, feel you, wrap myself around you I want to squeeze you, please you, I just can't get enough
	And if you move real slow, I'll let it go I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it
	I'm about to lose control and I think I like it I'm so excited
	This is the best of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18, 1995.
	Please do not call.
	Yes, it certainly is.
	Talk radio of a different cut.
	I don't even know what we are.
	We're just open line, unscreened, rip'em, tear'em, let it happen, talk radio.
	And that's the way I like it.
	Mr. Bell, I have been meaning to write you about an event that occurred two days prior to the San Francisco earthquake.
	My neighbor has a well, and it overflowed a surge from very deep.
	It flooded my yard as if a 12-inch line had broken in his yard and poured into mine.
	Two days later, the quake hit.
	And one comment about particles being faster than light.
	About five years ago, I recall that an Italian astronomer in Italy, and at the same time in England, an English astronomer, observed the same particle shoot from a distant star, and they made the same measurement.
	The particle had traveled faster than light.
	And then this.
	Art, a woman should be able to walk down the street safely, Nude, if she so chooses, discounting the reactions of the local police.
	But I get the feeling that some of the really rabid prosecutors of these sexual harassment cases feel that she should be able to do the same without anyone read, hear, or men even looking or taking notice.
	That is just not realistic.
	While she should be free from assault, physical and verbal, people are just naturally going to look, maybe even stare, Some might even take vocal notice as opposed to propositioning her, but I guess it's all the same to a feminazi.
	Do you think that feminazis would be nearly as offended if they were to be leered at by a lesbian?
	Or if they just knew which ladies they walked by were lesbian and the unpure thoughts that were having?
	Jim in Tupelo, Mississippi.
	Well, you know, basically, Jim, I really do agree with you.
	And, um, I'm sorry about what's happening between men and women in this country.
	I know it makes me sound like an old pogey, but I surely do miss the good old days.
	When man could look at a woman, and maybe even, you know, if he's out there on a construction site or something, give a big wolf whistle at her without her going to court and taking everything he has.
	Or without him getting into great trouble, I mean, Is that so bad?
	I guess the women would say yes.
	Yes, it's horrible being regarded this way.
	Well, I just don't.
	I guess I'm too old.
	I'm never going to change.
	I'm never going to be regarded as horrible.
	And I, frankly, at the risk of ending up in court or something, will probably keep looking until the day I die.
	First time caller line, you're on the air.
	Um, yes.
	I have a comment to make about the hemp issue that was brought up.
	And I would like to say that, one, that it is not just a question just about hemp.
	It is a question about the paper production of America.
	I heard after the question about hemp was asked an Arbor Day Foundation about planting trees.
	Hemp is not just Something that can be used as a political tool to control the drug war.
	Hemp is something that can also be used to help the paper production and overuse of our country.
	There's no question about it.
	The Wall Street Journal ran an article saying the government could realize half a trillion dollars a year in profit from the various industries that would spring up from hemp.
	And also, the point that I would like to get across Is that rather than planting more trees, rather than using things as hemp, even though I do think it is a positive alternative that can definitely be used, other than doing things like that, what needs to be embedded in the minds of Americans is the need for a recycling program.
	Americans need to know that recycling does help, that recycling does help our forests.
	Forests are being cut down at an amazing rate.
	They're killing all sorts of species, all sorts of waters.
	They're killing our trees.
	There's been, today especially, all over the United States and internationally, actions that were planned against multinational corporations in paper and... Are you a Greenpeacer?
	I am not necessarily a Greenpeacer.
	Well, you sound like a Greenpeacer.
	I see someone that typifies somebody like me as a Greenpeacer.
	A tree-hugger.
	A tree-hugger.
	No, I don't necessarily call myself a tree-hugger.
	But do you in fact actually hug trees?
	Oh, yes, I do, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
	No, no, look, look, hey, what you do in the privacy, you know, it's... The point that I'm trying to get across, though, is that I may be a tree hugger, I am not a greenpeacer, but, you know, I may appreciate the beauty of our trees, but what I'm saying is that what needs to be addressed here is that Is that we are living in an environment which is being destroyed at an incredible pace.
	All right, all right.
	We'll have to hold it there.
	I understand your message.
	Believe me, I do.
	And as I said, ma'am, far be it from me.
	You know, I mean, this is America.
	Still is America.
	Anyway, I don't want to talk about it anymore.
	East of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Hi, this is Brian from New Orleans.
	Hi, Brian.
	Well, first I'd like to congratulate you on your old archaic construction site catcall mentality.
	Well, I mean, really, yeah, I saw a lot of construction guys whistle at women when I was a kid.
	I remember it.
	It's not like the world ended.
	No, but I'm sure a woman who's been sexually assaulted before would really like to relive something like that.
	Okay, well I'd like to move on to politics.
	and i don't know if it will clear was a day in america where or wolf whistle
	from you know construction guy or something wasn't it with it was it was either flattering
	or she blush but it was a matter for litigation okay well i'd like to go on a politic
	bill clinton you can be running for re-election nineteen ninety-six and
	i do believe he Unbeatable.
	The President last night was protesting loudly that he is not, dammit, I am not irrelevant.
	Right.
	And you agree he is not irrelevant?
	Not in the 1996 election.
	You think he'll beat the pants off anybody who would dare to challenge him?
	Well, think about it.
	Right now, the economy is doing well.
	Well, yeah, reasonably well, yes.
	We are not in a state of war.
	Mmm, that's true.
	Unless you talk about drugs, that's a different story.
	True.
	But people generally vote with their pocketbook.
	That's true.
	And you're going to see Bob Dole, he's going to probably come out to be the frontrunner, I imagine.
	I'd say it's best chance, yeah.
	Well, unfortunately, Bob Dole isn't going to do it for the Republican Party, and you're going to have Bill Clinton in there, thank God, for another four years.
	And what do you think Mr. Clinton, the relevant president, will do for America, given another four years?
	Does he really need to change anything?
	Think what George Bush did for us.
	In other words, you're saying you can kind of just cruise?
	Well, do you not agree things are going relatively well for the United States right now compared to four years ago?
	I would say, as you pointed out, that the economy's cruising along now.
	I'll give you that.
	But as far as things going well, no, I don't think they are.
	I think socially we're absolutely a disaster and getting worse.
	Crime is bad, violent crime and getting worse.
	Crime statistics are overblown.
	Obviously, it's a little disturbing now that 14-year-olds are committing murders, but on a whole, crime statistics have not gone up dramatically, if not, they've gone down a little bit in the last 10 years.
	Well, I think in all categories but violent crime, in violent crime it's gone up.
	I'm still not sure.
	Maybe violent crime that's caught by the press.
	And you've got to admit, the press does hype crime now a lot more.
	So the whole thing is overblown as far as you're concerned.
	Where do you say you're calling from?
	New Orleans.
	New Orleans!
	New Orleans!
	Right.
	New Orleans.
	And you're downplaying the crime thing?
	Well, crime's obviously horrible right now.
	But violent crime, on a whole, has not gone up in the last ten years.
	Look at the statistics, Art.
	Yeah, all right.
	I could look at the statistics from your city, sir.
	Oh, of course.
	I mean, come on.
	New Orleans does have its problems, but statistics on a whole nationwide, violent crime and crime on the whole has stayed the same.
	And right now we're suffering from the hard copy, the current affair media hype of crime.
	Alright.
	Right now that sells papers.
	Alright, thank you very much for the call.
	I'm sorry, but the numbers I think are real and horrifying and frankly of all the cities you could be making that statement from, I find it a little more than passing strange that you're coming from New Orleans, but hey, that's alright.
	First time caller line, you're on the air.
	Art Bell? That's me. Oh boy, I'm on. I'm John from Carthus City. Yes, sir.
	Uh, about these earthquakes, we've been, well, my hair's standing up on the back of my neck,
	too, for a long time, and I've been, I work from eight to four in the morning, and I got you all
	night long every night, and this is my night off, so I got up to see if I could call you. Well,
	you, you did it. And I want to, I want you to, uh, first understand, I'm not trying to
	kid you or nothing, but I had a little experience here Saturday night or early Sunday morning.
	Yes sir.
	And I was out, I drive a patrol car and I finish the patrol where I park and all of a sudden something hit the back of my trunk and it was snowing and sleeting and I had the dome light on and I looked back there and here's this great big old bird sitting back there, one of those buzzards.
	It pooped on your patrol car?
	No, it sit on it.
	Oh, I see.
	And was looking at me.
	Well, I'm, I'm working on the assumption of these wild animals and stuff.
	They get, they act peculiar around earthquake time.
	Yes, sir.
	And, and here I'm looking at this thing just scared the daylights out of me.
	So I had my motor running, I had the radio playing and it was unconcerned.
	So I just put my car in gear and I took off.
	Down the road and here this big old bird was flying out in front of me and off to the side and back and forth and I went up to the end of the road there was a cul-de-sac there and I turned around and it flew around me and went down into the canyon into the valley so I drove back around the residential area a little bit trying to figure it out and I drove back to where I was sitting before and I sit there in the dark And darn if he didn't come back again.
	Oh my God, what a weird story.
	Oh, and you ought to see, I've never been that close to one of these things, and that's the ugliest thing you've ever seen in your life.
	How big was it, actually?
	I figured it would probably dress out about 20 pounds.
	Oh, that's big bird.
	With a big long neck, you know.
	Big bird.
	And you're telling me this thing chased you, and now let's back up a little here.
	You're an officer of the law?
	No, I'm a security guard.
	A security guard, so you're close.
	Yeah.
	And you would swear on your security guard manual, this is true.
	Well, this isn't the end of the story yet.
	Alright, go ahead.
	And, anyways, this time, I'd shine my flashlight right in his face, and I didn't have the dome light on in the car, and he wouldn't move, just looking at me, his head just kind of bobbing back and forth, so I start slamming on the seat on the...
	driver passed his side seat slamming that hollering and hollering and he just slid off the back like he had one foot on the
	bumper and went down on the ground and I didn't see him no more so I drove I pulled out and I
	drove around and there's a lot of equipment parked there and I shined my headlights all over
	and he disappeared well I take it you didn't want to get out of the car you got that right you think that thing
	would have come at you well I see I don't know that much about him I'm uh my life
	Last night I went to work and I got a maintenance man on there just during the week on afternoons and evenings, and he's a born and raised Nevada, and I asked him, have you been around these birds?
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	I said, oh, do you see one around here?
	He said, there's a big black one.
	He said, you see, it's got a big about four foot at least wingspan.
	I said, yeah, I noticed him all around here the last few days.
	Did you see him?
	I said, yeah, I said, how close do you ever get to them or how close do you get to, oh,
	you can't get near them.
	He said, I've been around them all my life.
	They won't let you get near.
	So I said, well, listen, I told my wife this story, I'm going to tell you, but I don't
	want you to tell it to anybody else because they're going to send somebody after me with
	a neck.
	Guys, guys in the white coats.
	Yeah.
	So you swear now this is true?
	Oh, I'm telling you, it's bothered me ever since then.
	I mean, I'm prepared for an earthquake.
	I lived in Butte County, California for 15 years before I moved here seven years ago.
	And I think in those 15 years, I probably experienced maybe four or five earthquakes.
	In the last year here in Carson City, I know there's been at least 10 of them.
	I know they're on the increase.
	All right, sir.
	I've got to go.
	Thank you very much for the story.
	That is a remarkable story.
	That is a remarkable story.
	And I'll tell you, here in Pahrump, Nevada, we have got the biggest birds I've ever seen in my life.
	I mean, these birds are freaky.
	Do you remember the movie, The Stand?
	Do you remember the bird, the big black bird in The Stand?
	That bird came from right here in Pahrump, Nevada.
	We've got them all over the place.
	This guy's not lying.
	They can get 20-pound birds.
	I mean, these birds are big.
	And these birds feed on roadkill.
	You know, I mean, they really feed on it.
	I mean, these are big birds.
	I kind of almost hit one, one day.
	They get so bloated, they get so fat, eating rabbits that have been squished on the road, that they can't even get into the air, you know?
	I mean, these are big birds, and they start flapping their wings, and they're flapping their wings, you know, and you're coming down the road, and they're trying to get airborne, and they're trying to get airborne, and their fat little bellies won't let them get up in the air.
	And I grazed one one day that way.
	That sucker couldn't get into the air fast enough.
	I mean, he was lumbering.
	Trying to get in.
	So we've got these big birds out here.
	They're big.
	Probably big enough to pick up a cat.
	Maybe not my cat, but a cat.
	And they're pretty frightening.
	That's where the bird in the stand came from, right here.
	I've got them all over the place.
	They're big.
	They're eerie.
	And if they ever got a mind to start doing what this man just said, it would be not tolerable, I'll tell you.
	First time caller line, you're on the air.
	Yeah, hello, this is Todd in Berkeley again.
	Hi, Todd.
	Yeah, I was listening to the first two hours.
	That was delightfully off the wall.
	You like that, huh?
	Yeah, I really did.
	I have kind of a clue, hopefully, it'll be to us and you to Madman Michael.
	An article in Scientific American many, many years ago, eight or nine, about phase-conjugate light, and it involves putting a laser beam through a crystal, and then at right angles, or at some angle, a virtual beam would emerge.
	Oh, well listen, you're talking Star Wars technology here, I believe.
	No, this actually involved theoretical time reversal of a laser beam.
	Oh, no kidding.
	I was curious.
	It sounded like he used a laser beam.
	He did.
	He used a laser, souped up from a CD player.
	To trigger the Jacob's Ladder effect?
	That's correct.
	Okay.
	About McNamara, it sounds like, I hate to sound conspiratorial, but it sounds like he's trying to give Bill Clinton a means to vindicate himself.
	Well, a lot of people looked at it that way.
	You do, I take it.
	Well, he snapped up.
	Bill Clinton snapped up on it so quickly, it was really kind of suspicious.
	Well, I think things are getting pathetic at the White House.
	The President is reduced to going on television and, uh, beseeching us, uh, with the fact that he is relevant.
	Yeah, no, this guy from New Orleans that called saying Bill Clinton was virtually unbeatable.
	Oh, yes.
	That's assuming he makes it to the election, you know, a la Whitewater and the, uh, mean Arkansas investigations.
	He needs to be re-elected because you know what's waiting for him if he isn't?
	What's that?
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	Probably bars.
	Well, I don't know, but there's this young lady waiting with a lawyer and a lawsuit.
	Well, that's true, too.
	But, uh, for all these people who, well, one of the things he was saying was the economy's in such good shape.
	I mean, can you imagine, sir, that going to court?
	I mean, really now, you know he's married to, uh, I think she's a pretty, what's the right word, stern woman?
	I think she's... Strenuous.
	Strenuous, um, activist, um...
	You know, probably pretty rough if you ever got into an argument with her.
	And when this trial would start, there'd be a lot of testimony and details that would tend to get you killed when you went home.
	Yeah, I hear she throws things, too.
	Rumors.
	Yeah, one other thing.
	I just can't imagine Bill Clinton having four years that he won't be accountable to the voters for.
	I think that would be the ruination, as if this is anything to crow about right now.
	No, I appreciate your call.
	Thank you very much.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Art?
	Yes.
	I've got to tell you, you're very comedic tonight.
	Let me tell you what went right past the lady with the NASA ships and the concern about the ozone.
	When you said to her, Teflon, that was good.
	Well, I'm glad you liked it.
	You know what this is, don't you?
	No, I don't.
	It's the Reluctant Prophet.
	I'm going to change that tag name.
	You gave it to me a year ago.
	Uh, let me tell you what you made me do tonight.
	You made me bring down my Mr. Coffee, coffee pot, which I've been avoiding.
	I've been just pouring my water into the, you know, thing.
	So I'm, you know, I'm addicted to you.
	And I have to tell you this, you're not nuts, and neither is the madman from, uh, Paramus.
	Where's he from?
	He's from Missouri.
	Missouri, yeah.
	He's, this kid's a smart kid.
	I also, if he's still listening, and I'm sure he's not, because he's got a million followers.
	He gave his phone number out over the air.
	I couldn't believe that.
	He's going to make a lot of new friends.
	Oh, he's going to make a lot of new friends.
	I mean, I gave him his choice.
	He didn't have to do that.
	Perhaps he's going to meet one friend like Wilbur Norville.
	You know, the minus and the plus, that's going to help.
	You are exactly right.
	He might connect with just the right person.
	Sir, I've got to go.
	All right.
	All right, thank you.
	He might connect with just the right person.
	You never know.
	So, Chicago, watch your electrical current.
	And, uh, I'm not sure what you're talking about.
	I'm not sure.
	I'm not sure.
	you Playing a part in a picture joke?
	Well, take the long way home.
	Take the long way home.
	Tell the joke of the neighborhood.
	Don't go out the neighborhood, just to get a good feeling, baby.
	We'll take the long road home.
	manufacturing companies, commercializing those manufacturing companies, growing in
	building capacity, and of course, that gives me a real tasks in terms of making sure
	that real ... building capacity is not blocked.
	Sometimes if a building permit is allowed to provide solid different operating place
	between the houses, we can get some of that property built within the width of the
	building.
	From the kingdom of Nile, this is the best of Coast to Coast AM with Art Bell.
	Tonight's show originally aired on April 18th, 1995.
	Please do not fall.
	Uh, from Brynn Marie, uh... Art, regarding wolf whistles, I was hospitalized for over a month back in 83.
	Had wasted away to nothing.
	The illness and medications had made my face puffy and about one-fourth of my hair had fallen out.
	In short, I was feeling down-dooby-doo, down-down.
	About three weeks after I'd been released, I was walking the six blocks to my grandma's house.
	That's where wolves always get you, Bryn, on the way to grandma's house.
	Suddenly, I heard a wolf whistle.
	I looked around, saw a city worker with his head sticking out of a manhole.
	He whistled again.
	When I made eye contact, smiled, and went back to work.
	I felt ten feet tall, and not just because the guy was standing in a hole.
	The man did more for my self-esteem with that simple gesture than anything else possibly could have since then.
	When I've been to visit my dad, I've noticed that on occasion he'll give a wolf whistle at a woman.
	Most often to the bedraggled young moms with several very small kids in tow, I've seen those women stand a little taller, too.
	I have to conclude that not all people are as nice as that city worker was.
	And that if you cannot say something sincerely complimentary about someone's looks, it's probably wise to stay silent.
	But I won't forget that, worker.
	Not in a million years.
	That's Bryn Marye.
	And, um, back to the lines we go.
	East of the Great Rockies, you're on the air.
	Good morning.
	I'm a retired Air Force field grade officer who, um, has I've been one of the few fortunate ones to probably read all of the UFO reports that were available outside of Project Blue Book in a building in Washington, D.C.
	years ago called Tempo E. Really?
	It was an intelligence... You've read all the secret stuff?
	You got it.
	And, um, I did tell this to one Air Force officer who I think is your move-on director down in Florida, but I can't remember his name.
	Yes.
	And he got quite intrigued by it, and I'm trying to put some names together for him of those people that would be able to confirm that.
	Look, look, look, look, look.
	I gotta cut through the quick here, and I've gotta ask you.
	Basically, what do you know that we don't?
	If you've really read these papers, sir, No, these were reports.
	Intelligence reports.
	And they didn't deduce anything that said why or what they were.
	They just told what happened, where it happened, and when it happened, and copies were sent That I recall to the Defense Intelligence Agency.
	I don't remember if CIA or any other agency that did a distribution for these.
	Was there a conclusion?
	There were no conclusions.
	No, they were strictly straight gathering of intelligence type information.
	Would somebody like yourself who read them come to a conclusion?
	Um, I came to the conclusion that there were many, many sightings that were never reported anyplace else except to this investigative intelligence agency, and then just filed.
	Except what they were then subsequently transferred to DI, Defense Intelligence Agency.
	Yes.
	And I'm not sure about the NSA or CIA, because it's been too long ago that I've read them all, but there was a room With nothing but five drawer filing cabinets, and I had gotten special permission to go in and read them because I was in a special training situation.
	And I was just interested in the subject at the time.
	It wasn't until recently, until I moved out here in Nevada, that I've gotten more intrigued because of what we allegedly have out here in Area 51.
	Did you sign a security statement?
	Say again?
	Again, I'll say, did you sign a security statement?
	No, I was at the time holding the highest possible security clearance available in the Air Force at my level, which was an SSIR clearance.
	And it allowed me access to special intelligence.
	Are you violating anything by telling us what you're telling us?
	No, because I am not telling you anything that most of the reports were secret.
	I am.
	Okay, that's why I asked you.
	A person reading them, like yourself, would conclude what?
	That we are being visited?
	That there are extraterrestrials?
	That the UFOs are really craft of some sort, built by some kind of intelligence?
	Would you conclude that?
	I would conclude that.
	I would also deduce that there are many, many, many visits and sightings that have never been reported anywhere except in this data bank of files.
	Now, whether they've been subsequently reduced to microfiche Destroyed, or what have you.
	I really don't know.
	I've never followed up on it myself.
	I've been told that other people have tried to get to these files, but I haven't had the right nomenclature or coding, and I've been turned down by the Air Force because they said we don't have these files.
	So, filing a Freedom of Information Act, even if you knew you were going after, would be of no use?
	No, they have filed, apparently, a Freedom of Information Act with this agency asking for Those reports.
	However, they've gotten back negative statements.
	They're not available.
	They're no longer available.
	They never were available.
	You don't have the right file number, the right case number, the right sequence number.
	And of course, that's just a way of... Alright, let me try one more question.
	It's irresistible.
	You are familiar with the nomenclature?
	Yes, and I reported that to that gentleman in Florida.
	I'm trying to think of his name.
	It does not matter.
	But he's an Air Force type that was familiar with it and was going Uh, access to these files, if they still exist.
	All right, look, um, I can't spend any more time with this right now, but I would like you to contact me either by mail or fax.
	Yeah, I'm going to fax you, because I've had a hell of a time trying to reach you.
	It's just virtually impossible to get through any of the lines.
	I know, I know.
	And I've just recently started to try this with you.
	All right, fax me, and, uh, and thank you.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Hi.
	Hi, Art.
	How are you?
	Fine.
	I'm glad to hear it.
	So, I wanted to find out how you liked XCOM.
	XCOM?
	The file.
	Oh, I loved it.
	Did you really?
	Yeah.
	Was the manipulation pretty interesting for you as far as, you know, sending the craft out to investigate the sites and whatnot?
	Yes.
	I thought that was a pretty, pretty accurate estimation of what, you know, if teams like that exist around the world.
	Yes, sir.
	You know, what they would be doing.
	I agree with you.
	Listen, I do a lot of volunteer work out here in Spokane.
	Anything, from anything, Including animal training with big cats like lions and tigers, all the way to a suicide prevention task force.
	Right.
	And that young lady sounded rather distressed tonight.
	I know.
	I know.
	I felt really bad.
	I wish there was something that I could do.
	Obviously, there's no way for me here in Spokane to do anything about it.
	Well, hopefully she'll contact me.
	Yeah, that would be nice.
	Well, listen, I just wanted to call and see how you liked the file.
	Have you got any enjoyment out of it?
	Great enjoyment, and I surely appreciate it.
	Thank you, my friend.
	Thank you for your show.
	Take care.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Hello!
	Hello!
	Yes!
	Hey!
	Hey!
	Art!
	That's me.
	Hey, this is great!
	I've been listening to you all over the country, and I finally got a station that comes in clear, and I'm right at home at Twin Falls.
	Twin Falls, Idaho.
	Oh, yes, that's right.
	We're on the air now in Twin Falls, right?
	Yeah, I don't know how long you've been, but when we got home, here you were.
	And I thought, well, I don't have to listen to you blabbing out anymore.
	Yeah, you're such a good radio talk show host and probably my favorite of all of them.
	I don't listen to too many but yours.
	And I really like to listen to Doc Democrat.
	Oh, he hasn't been on this morning, has he?
	Oh, no, I don't think so.
	And Charlie and Leonard.
	And, you know, it's just fun to hear them, even though I don't always agree with what they say.
	I think Leonard has things pretty right, because I think he reads his Bible a lot and isn't too screwed up by a lot of... Well, you occasionally may go off the extremist edge a little bit.
	Well, I'm not sure.
	I haven't listened to him enough to know exactly what he believes.
	If you really study his Bible, you ought to think straight, and I feel kind of sorry for People are so caught up with all this UFO stuff, because I don't know, it seems like there's an intentional effort to be deceiving.
	Something is deceiving.
	I don't have it all straight.
	Yeah, but see, that's part of the draw.
	Yeah, you're right.
	What people don't understand, the curious ones want to know about.
	Yeah, and see if it's true.
	Sure.
	And one thing I like about you, you don't just jump to conclusions and say, well, this is the way it is.
	You still have your, except I kind of wish you were, you would believe in the Bible and the scriptures a little more, but maybe one of these days you'll study it.
	I don't.
	I don't.
	Well, I have studied it, ma'am.
	Oh, you have?
	Oh, I've read the Bible many times.
	Oh, well.
	I don't disbelieve them.
	I don't.
	I don't fully embrace them, and I don't reject them.
	Yeah, well, I know you're an agnostic, and that's kind of a terrible place to be in, because I was there once, and then finally I truly, you know, decided, or I accepted Christ as my Savior, is what I did, and then I started reading the Scripture, and I thought, oh, this is true!
	This is true!
	And it seemed like His Spirit was communing with my spirit, and I just knew that it was true.
	But I did go through an awful It's an act of faith, you see.
	You accept it on faith.
	I've never had that luxury.
	I have this horrid little intellectual thing that burdens me that I have to be able to lay my hands on.
	I have to be able to see it and prove it and touch it and understand it and pick it apart and Be able to be satisfied myself that this is so, whatever it is, and it makes it very difficult for me to accept things purely on faith.
	That's all.
	East of the Great Rockies, you're on the air.
	Good morning.
	Hey, Artis, it's Man from San Antonio.
	Yes, sir.
	Hey, I'd like to come in here on your program tonight.
	It was very beautiful.
	Glad you enjoyed it.
	I got a couple of quick questions for you, then a short black helicopter story.
	Oh, I like those.
	Okay, first off, whatever happened to that guy I believe was in San Diego who, uh, Got verification from the government of UFO activity?
	We were in the local news in San Diego, I believe?
	He's still filing Freedom of Information requests, as far as I know, and still getting responses, so that's all I know right now.
	Okay.
	Hey, you had a great program tonight, Art.
	Now, the black helicopter story... Yes?
	Hey, I was coming home from the store.
	Yeah.
	And I got pulled over by a black 5.0 and a black Jeep Cherokee Grant.
	It was kind of crazy, Art.
	And they pulled me over, pulled me out of the car, and put me on the ground, handcuffed me, didn't read me any rights or anything, asked them what the problem was, and they told me that I fit a description.
	Went through all this and usually when you get pulled over or handcuffed or anything like that, you know, they'll read you your rights or give you kind of an idea, but these guys are very, you know, very stern.
	Not when you get pulled over by the black helicopter, please.
	No.
	I mean, they had, they were B.A.T.F.
	is what they were.
	They were B.A.T.F.?
	Yeah, and I try to, you know, try to report it to them, I mean, report to the local police officers and stuff.
	And they had no record of any, uh, ATF activity in the city.
	Of course not.
	I'm calling from New Orleans, as a matter of fact.
	Oh, I see.
	But, uh, my theory on the black helicopters is that they help out the local, uh, police.
	Well... I mean... You know, traditionally, local police and, uh, lousy federal agencies like the ATF, uh, don't get along real well.
	I don't think so, but I know that the local police told me that, uh, The NLPD told me that they didn't have any record of any federal activity, and I gave a call to... Of course they don't.
	...the Louisiana FBI Department, and... Even they might not know.
	No, they said they didn't know, but it was kind of strange, and it's just kind of a different twist from the black helicopter.
	Well, I appreciate it.
	It is a new story, sir, and I appreciate it.
	Okay, watch out for those black 5.0s.
	Yes, sir, I've got you.
	Right.
	You don't frequently hear about them doing, in essence, traffic stops, though.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Yeah, Art.
	Yes, that's me.
	This is Sean calling from KNCR, Bakersfield, California.
	Oh, up in, uh, where?
	Bakersfield.
	Oh, KNCR, yes.
	Yeah.
	I've been trying to get through to you for a while.
	The federal inmate that wrote you a letter.
	Oh, yes.
	certain things, certain callers didn't believe certain things you said.
	I don't know if this is ominous or not, but I haven't heard from him lately.
	Huh. I'm calling to you right now from inside of one of California's finer institutions.
	You are?
	Yes.
	How can you make a call at this time of the morning?
	I'm working. I work.
	Oh, in other words, you're a guard.
	Yes.
	Okay, I got you.
	Everything you said is true and then some.
	Really?
	Yes. That is 100%. It's all true.
	And if everybody knew actually, the access that these people have things to and all the
	things they have, just for one example, everybody that paroles in California, we give them $200
	and they leave.
	Really?
	$200 is gate money when they leave.
	This comes from way back when, when they used to give them, you know, a new suit and bus fare.
	Well, there has been inflation.
	Yeah, $200 is a lot.
	Most of these people are returned from, I mean, they get this money and they get out.
	And they buy more drugs and they come right back.
	Well, to twist an old phrase I've used in a commercial, you cannot buy a fine wool suit for $200 today.
	That's true.
	I like that commercial.
	Things even such as, they have rights to anything that is sent to them from a publisher.
	One guard found child pornography in somebody's locker.
	Great.
	Took this away from him.
	And the warden said, you will return this person's property.
	Because he received this.
	How did he get the child pornography back?
	Yes.
	Because you received this.
	He received this legally from a publisher, sealed from the publisher in the mail, and he has a right to this, anything from a publisher.
	And I don't see how somebody can have a right to that.
	Who's got it better, the guys on the inside or you?
	Oh, totally them.
	I mean, as I say, three hops in a car, laundry, everything is provided for them, schools, computer class, GED classes.
	I've got to get up and go to work.
	I've got bills to pay, you know, I've got Life, I got crazy people on the streets to deal with.
	They far have it easier.
	Get to work out three times a day, go to bed, sleep when they want, get up when they want.
	Well, like I said, I haven't heard from them.
	I just couldn't believe certain people called and said that... I wonder if somebody had a talk with them.
	Yeah, it could have very well happened because if everybody knew what went on in here, there'd definitely be a lot more public upcry about it.
	I couldn't believe the people that called.
	Oh, this can't be going on.
	Oh, this can't be going on.
	It's going on beyond your wildest dreams.
	You cannot begin to imagine.
	Ice machines.
	Microwaves.
	I'm looking at them right now.
	All right, sir.
	I appreciate your, uh, uh, collaborating and story.
	Thank you very much for the call.
	That is truly, truly sickening.
	West of the Rockies, you're on the air.
	Ah, Doc Democrat.
	Well, I'll be damned.
	Well, good morning, Arch.
	Talk about at the last minute.
	Hey, wasn't that outstanding leadership last night by the President?
	I mean, he set down a deadline.
	I am relevant.
	I am relevant.
	Well, he set down a welfare deadline for the Senate Republicans.
	Fourth of July, and so Bob Dole can't play his little stalling games.
	Uh, you know, President Clinton was the guy that... Was that stalling games or Stalin games?
	It sounded suspiciously like Stalin.
	No, no, no, no.
	No, stalling.
	Delaying games, how's that?
	I see, that clears it.
	But anyhow, this President, uh, you know, he's gonna get some action done here on these issues because, uh...
	You know, for two years, the Republicans filibustered everything he wanted to do.
	All these ideas, half of these ideas that the Republicans are doing, were Bill Clinton's ideas.
	Stolen?
	You mean stolen from Bill Clinton?
	Yeah, exactly.
	They filibustered it when he was in power with the Democrats.
	What a low-life thing to do.
	The Republicans stole Bill's ideas.
	That's right.
	And now he's put, you know, all of that... Right out of veto.
	The only thing, there's just one thing I don't understand about all that.
	What's that?
	If they stole his ideas, then, like, how come he's threatening to veto them?
	Because they changed him and made him so radical because they're such radical people that he has to change them to get them back into the mainstream.
	I see.
	I mean, that's just, you know, common sense, but I mean, I think this president is going to get every one of his campaign promises done by 96.
	Do you think Bill Clinton could cross a cattle guard?
	Cross a cattle guard?
	Yeah.
	Certainly.
	Why not?
	Doc, tell America good night.
	We're all done.
	Good night, everybody!
	Oh, boy.
	Maybe nothing will save us.
	That'll do it.
	We're out of time.
	I'm sorry, everybody.
	We live and die by the clock, and now it's die time.
	So, from the high desert...
	On behalf of all of those out there who make this program possible.
	Thank you.
	Good night.

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