There's no gas station ever, and we've completely run out of gas.
The car no longer functions.
We're rolling down a hill in France.
Trucks are overtaking us.
We're out of gas. We're out of gas.
Totally. Who are you?
What do you mean? Who are you? Luke.
There's a guy called Luke and he has this shitty YouTube channel on this stupid show called Take Confidential.
You ever heard of it? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's like some guy and he thinks he has a YouTube thing.
Have you heard of that guy on YouTube who's called Luke?
You. Is he your cousin?
No, he's your cousin. No, your cousin in his YouTube channel.
And he thinks he has a YouTube channel. We're busy racing stupid cars.
We ain't doing stupid YouTube videos. We're not walking around with an iPhone just doing dumb shit, just drinking and being retards, Luke.
So you have to take your fucking shit and fuck off.
You don't need to grow up. We're really immature, man.
We're millionaires, all right? We got something.
We're sophisticated gentlemen of the planet, of the Earth.
You're not. Fuck you, guys.
I'm going to go ahead and start the engine.
Okay.
What are we doing?
We're doing this whole thing again.
What do you mean again? Again.
Or we'd drive around Europe and spend loads of money in supercars.
Yeah. We'd be stupid. We'd never do that.
Just drink booze. Just drink endless booze.
We'd never do that. It was horrible. Last night was horrible.
Marcel! Marcel?
Unfortunately you've been caught a bit.
Unfortunately, you've been caught a bit, Marcel.
But you know what, Marcel?
I'll delete this. Maybe.
Marcel, before we go in to see Tristan, we have to admit, it does get fucking hard.
It does get hot. They fucking booze hard.
It does get hot. Never do that booze.
It was horrible. Why?
I feel like absolute ass.
Why? Because of booze.
Booze is, it's literal poison.
I'm not sure, I don't get why we drink it.
You have to tell your cousin that, because I think he disagrees.
Your cousin Tristan.
He does this every day.
So this is it.
Yeah, I'll...
Welcome to the real world.
This isn't the real world, Cat P.
So France, let us in.
Fuck France. I can't know my fucking Google Maps will fucking work.
Fuck France. So France has tried to sabotage us by making Google Maps not work.
Basically, yeah. Old French s**t.
You're fucking people.
They are my people. I do apologize for the French people.
You're fucking serious. Nobody likes the French.
No one. No one ever says, I like the French.
Ever. I don't think I've ever heard it before.
I don't think I've ever heard those words.
Ever. The only thing I can do to pay them back is to be less likeable than they are.
So come to their country in a nice, fast, loud car to break every single fucking road law they have.
I'm sorry I don't have a high-vis jacket in my fucking boot.
I'm a fucking freak.
Like you French.
Every single time I came to France to fight, I won.
Ha ha ha!
Play the English anthem, go home.
Watching your f**king f**k.
F**k you. F**k.
What is this? What's this?
A windmill? F**k.
It's f**king. Fix this.
I can't fix them.
I've given up on France.
Alright, so basically France is here to be used and used by us and our superpowers.
Correct. They shouldn't have let us in.
Yeehaw. Yeehaw.
Do you know about this song?
Not really. No, you don't.
You don't know shit. We have no gas.
We have four miles in the tank.
There's no gas stations. You don't know about this song.
Do you know all the words to this song?
No. Really?
You're a full grown man who doesn't know all the words to Rapper's Delight.
What do you mean? That's not...
No one does. Big Bang Hank and Wonderbike And Master G, they know all the words.
And I know all the words.
The hippie to the hip, hip, hoppy.
You don't stop the rockin' to the bang-a-bang-a-boogie.
Say up, jump the boogie to the rhythm of the boogie to beat.
Now what you hear is not a ten stop rappin' to the beat.
And me, the groove, and my friends are gonna try to move your feet.
See, I am wonderfully and I'd like to say hello.
A little black to the white So far, you've heard my voice, but I brought one friend along, and next on the mic is my man Luke.
Come on, Luke, sing that song!
You never know you're worse!
Then I go by the code of the doctor of the visiting reasons, I'll tell you why.
You see, I'm six foot one, and I'm tons of fun, and I dress to a tee.
You see, I got more clothes, I'm a Muhammad Ali, and I dress so viciously.
I got bodyguards, I got two big cards, it definitely ain't the wife.
I got a Lincoln Continental and a sunroof Cadillac.
We're just really on the wall.
I got a color TV so I can see the Knicks play basketball.
Hear me talking about checkbook, credit card, more money than a sucker could ever spend.
But I wouldn't give a sucker or a bump from the rock and not a dime till I made it again.
Everybody go hotel, motel.
What you gonna do today?
You're a proud girl, gonna get some break a dog walk in the death row jail Everybody go home, jail, home, jail, Holiday Inn Say it, your girl starts acting up I bet you take her friend I'm at the gym, I'm out in my glow It's on you, so what you gonna do?
Well it's on and on and on and on and on The beat don't stop until the break of dawn I said M-A-S-T-E-R-G to the double E I said I go by the unforgettable name of Slim Aligoma Master G Well, my name is known all over the world For all the foxy ladies and the pretty girls I'm going down in history As the baddest rapper you ever seen Now feel the highs and you feel the lows We may start spinning into the doze Start popping your veins and then stop when you leave
And moving your body while you're sitting in your chair Damn, you start doing the free or stand down Right out of your seat then you throw your hands high in the air You rock it to the rhythm straight in the air You rock it to the beat without a care It's a song I tried to emcee, so I'm the affair Now I'm not as tall as the rest of the gang But I rock to the beat just the same I got a little face and a fair brow Now I'm going here to do ladies' hypnotize It's on and on and on and on and on The beat don't stop until the break of dawn I said it on and on and on and on and on
Like a hot butter cup, then pop the pops Give a little hop, then pop, pop the dope Dance, now become alive, y'all, and give me what you got I guess by now you can take a hunch You might find that I am the baby of the bunch But that's okay, I still keep in time Cause all I'm here to do is use a boogie up my eyes It's on and on and on and on The beat don't stop until the break of dawn I said it on and on and on and on and on Like rock, y'all, now get on the floor I'm gonna freak your hair, I'm gonna freak your hair I'm gonna move you out of this atmosphere Cause I'm one of a kind and I'll shock you
I'm gonna put you to your seat, you're a wild one I said it one, two, three, four Come on, girls, now get on the floor Come alive, y'all, and give me what you got Cause I'm guaranteed to make you rock I said one, two, three, four Tell me, wonder, what are you waiting for?
Said I hit rock, they hit me too, they hit me They hit me, they hit me I don't have a verse.
I don't know my verse. It's not my verse.
Your shit country.
We have zero miles left on the petrol gauge.
There's no petrol stations.
And on top of all of it, you don't know your own fucking verse.
It's not my verse.
You know what this means, Luke?
Thank you for watching!
Bye!
Looks like we're in our gas.
There's no gas station ever, and we've completely run out of gas.
Car no longer functions.
We're rolling down a hill in France.
Trucks are overtaking us.
We're out of gas. We're out of gas.
Totally.
I wish we had this nice hill.
Have you tried saying fuck gas?
Bye!
That's a joke that doesn't even make sense in particular.
No one knows that, do they? If you say fuck gas, you don't mean gas.
You skip the gas station. I tried that one.
There was no gas station and it didn't work.
Anyway, it is conclusive evidence.
Literally, this is the end of our spring.
This is it now. This is the end, isn't it?
We now live by the side of the road in France.
So we're homeless. Can we at least be under the bridge?
Okay. Okay.
So, I mean, we've got a nice roof there.
I guess I can try and sleep there.
You can sleep there. We can hunt.
I'll throw new homes, mate.
Nice. You know what?
I know, it might not be that bad.
There's no French people here.
Hm.
So, we now live under the bridge of France.
Where's confidential?
So this is where we live now.
It is quite bullshit.
It's true, literally.
I don't know.
Maybe this is how they want, maybe they have a population problem.
They want people to get trapped here and live under bridges.
This is definitely somehow your fault, your French.
Oh no, I like it here.
The nice French air under the nice French bridge.
Nice French car, passerbyers.
No one cares about us, so no one pulls over to ask if we're okay.
So day three under the bridge.
Day three. It gets quite boring.
Boring.
The whole bridge thing.
I was much more excited the first day.
Sleeping's okay, it's not too bad.
There's a lot of noise, but you get used to it on the second day.
Day seven now.
Still quite hungry.
Forcing our human minds to be able to extract the air, the water from the air, to hydrate ourselves.
Explain that to me!
I can't. No wonder they got fucking...
We had no gas in their tanks.
Dumbass! Dude, this is your fault!
I like it here. It's day seven.
I'm starting to like it. Maybe why the French did this to us.
I don't know why they did this to us.
Maybe this is what they want. Maybe they want people under their bridges.
You lure them in.
Is that why they have unchecked immigration?
They might be. Think about it.
This is unacceptable and France must pay.
It must be the ultimate price.
What's the ultimate price?
The ultimate price?
How'd he find us? We've been lost for nine days.
We're back! The superhero!
This is a French cunt.
It's not my fault. You're a French cunt and nobody likes you.
That's a little fucking gas station, Luke.
Of all the people in the world who I despise, we jump to the top of the hill.
Fuck you, Luke. This is my fault.
I didn't do that. That was because of our spots.
It is your fault, Luke.
That ain't my fucking fault, Liz.
I'm a French. I might be the only French one here.
That might be true. You dickhead.
You know you're smoking, yeah?
That's petrol, Bob.
I'm gonna go down the road.
This can't be normal.
I don't think they'll let you smoke.
I'm not at all.
I'm ready for the boom.
I don't need a boom yet.
It is actually almost like now He might be. Just saying.
I don't know if anyone on Tech Confidential noticed this.