Tate Speech - Andrew Tate - THE WONDERS OF FLYING ON CHRISTMAS | Tate Confidential Ep. 130
Aired: 2022-07-26
Duration: 31:03


=== Finally We Start Drinking (14:23) ===

[00:00:03]  What are these? Train tickets.
[00:00:06]  31 hours by train.
[00:00:10]  That means 31 hours of non-stop boozing with your cousin.
[00:00:14]  No!
[00:00:15]  They confident in that.
[00:00:34]  I'm going to get the camera.
[00:00:35]  I got the hot switches.
[00:00:52]  Thank you.
[00:01:00]  This is Genesis Fourth Street.
[00:01:21]  Finally!
[00:01:40]  Finally! Finally we start drinking.
[00:01:42]  Jesus Christ. I need a drink.
[00:01:45]  Pones have been four hours.
[00:01:47]  I mean me, ten minutes.
[00:01:50]  We need to stop drinking. Oh, I need to stop drinking.
[00:01:54]  I'm not going to take confidential why, but I have now become, next week and a half, the world's worst alcoholic.
[00:02:01]  Hello. Hi. Welcome on board.
[00:02:03]  Thank you. My name is Andrea. I see you all on Instagram.
[00:02:06]  It's Christmas. You're chilling with your family.
[00:02:08]  You're drinking. You're getting fat.
[00:02:10]  And you're waiting for the new year to make any significant changes in your life.
[00:02:12]  And let me tell you something. That is absolutely and utterly amateur.
[00:02:15]  That is what amateurs do.
[00:02:16]  And the reason I can say that's what amateurs do is because that's what everyone does, and everybody's a fucking amateur.
[00:02:21]  This week in between Christmas and New Year is perhaps the most wasted week of the year.
[00:02:26]  Nobody does anything significant.
[00:02:28]  You're sitting around, it's just been Christmas, and you just want to wait, etc., etc., etc.
[00:02:32]  If you start at the same time as everybody else, You don't have an advantage over everybody else.
[00:02:36]  You're going to run a race. You want to go first, don't you?
[00:02:39]  Right? So do you have to wait for the calendar to reset because you really need that little bit of extra motivation to not be a lazy piece of shit?
[00:02:46]  Do you need to see a number one on the calendar to get up and get your work done?
[00:02:50]  It's the day after Christmas.
[00:02:51]  The jet's fueled, jumping on the plane, and I'm going out into the streets to make money.
[00:02:56]  And I have a bunch of money.
[00:02:57]  And I'm up working.
[00:02:58]  So I don't know how you can stay at home with no money and think, oh, I don't need to go work right now.
[00:03:03]  I can wait for the new year. No, you fucking cannot wait.
[00:03:05]  You absolutely cannot wait for the new year.
[00:03:07]  Whatever your resolutions are, they should have been fixed before Christmas.
[00:03:11]  Before Christmas, the second best time is now.
[00:03:13]  It's not when the new year comes.
[00:03:15]  Don't be an amateur. Be a professional.
[00:03:16]  This is a message to everyone out there whose brain is capable of resonating with my genius.
[00:03:21]  If you wait for the new year, you're the same as everybody else.
[00:03:24]  You're an amateur. If you get up and you get it done today, the new year is now.
[00:03:27]  Christmas is over. It's all finished.
[00:03:29]  You don't need to drink on that night.
[00:03:30]  It's the worst night to party anyway.
[00:03:32]  Everyone's an amateur. Start today, fuck New Year off, and have the best year of your life.
[00:03:38]  Let me say one more thing. These last two years of the enslavement of humankind in which we've endured, I don't think this is ending.
[00:03:45]  I don't think this is ending anytime soon.
[00:03:47]  I think things are going to get harder and harder.
[00:03:48]  And you need money to protect yourself.
[00:03:50]  I'm insulated from clown world because there's a huge...
[00:03:54]  Pile of money in the way.
[00:03:55]  It's hard to get to me.
[00:03:57]  But you people, you don't have the insulation.
[00:03:59]  So you need more passports, you need more cash, you need a better network, you need to get your life together, and you certainly don't have a fucking week to waste.
[00:04:20]  Thank you very much.
[00:04:22]  Thank you.
[00:04:23]  Enjoy your meal. Thank you.
[00:04:26]  You know, Luke, three years ago, what were you doing for life?
[00:04:32]  In Chipotle. You were working in Chipotle.
[00:04:35]  Yep, correct. And your cousin messaged you on Facebook and said, I'm starting an outlier.
[00:04:41]  Do you want to come help me?
[00:04:43]  Correct. And I did.
[00:04:46]  And now we're eating pizza on private planes.
[00:04:49]  In the sky. Yeah.
[00:04:52]  So I'm basically Jesus.
[00:04:53]  I saved your life. Might be.
[00:04:56]  I'm actually basically Jesus.
[00:04:58]  You're Morpheus. You're certainly Morpheus.
[00:05:00]  I'm Morpheus and I got you out.
[00:05:01]  Yeah, you certainly got me out.
[00:05:03]  It was the wake up, Luke.
[00:05:04]  He's Morph Jesus. I got you out of the Matrix, didn't I? Yeah.
[00:05:08]  Morph Jesus. I am Morpheus.
[00:05:10]  I can fight as well. Do you think that you not being able to drink that glass of booze has anything to do with your liver in this place?
[00:05:23]  I don't know. Are we actually rich, guys?
[00:05:27]  Yes. Are we actually rich?
[00:05:30]  Yes. Yes.
[00:05:32]  I'm from a council state.
[00:05:34]  How did this happen? I have no clue.
[00:05:38]  I did work at StreamYard, and what we've created is brilliant.
[00:05:46]  So, we do completely deserve it, but...
[00:05:51]  At the same time we've just gone back, he's just a shitty joke, you know?
[00:05:56]  Keep boozing.
[00:05:58]  Drink a roof.
[00:06:00]  Booze. Poison.
[00:06:09]  Who's drank oldest booze?
[00:06:11]  Why himself? You did.
[00:06:12]  I don't know why. Because fuck you, that's why.
[00:06:15]  Because for one hour and 20 minutes, I'm sitting in a private fucking jet.
[00:06:20]  I see her fucking jerking off, am I? No, let's enjoy it.
[00:06:23]  A fucking beluga mulga.
[00:06:24]  But alcohol's not enjoyable.
[00:06:26]  Luke, I need to maximize this experience.
[00:06:30]  Pizza, chocolate, don't even like chocolate.
[00:06:33]  Akito, broken hand.
[00:06:36]  What's this? A little slink you've been working on.
[00:06:39]  That could work. You understand?
[00:06:41]  I have to do moves to pay credit to the severity of the situation.
[00:06:48]  Let's just sleep. Tristan, if you were blind, how would you signal to someone that you were helping?
[00:07:02]  Just tell them. That's what I do as well.
[00:07:08]  Why would you not tell them?
[00:07:09]  I understand. I wasn't gonna tell him.
[00:07:18]  What did Luke do? Luke, if you were blind and you had to tell someone you were hungry, what would you do?
[00:07:29]  That? That's what?
[00:07:31]  Do you know what I'd do if I was blind and I'd tell someone I was hungry?
[00:07:34]  What? I'd say, hey, I'm hungry.
[00:07:38]  Okay, you got me.
[00:07:41]  I got two for God.
[00:07:46]  Sweet, sweet.
[00:07:49]  Sweet red wine.
[00:07:52]  Alright, eat that fine.
[00:07:54]  Thank you very much.
[00:07:55]  Amazing.
[00:08:08]  Just like magic.
[00:08:10]  More boots please. More?
[00:08:12]  Yes, please. Stupid.
[00:08:17]  It's stupid. Fuck off before I attack you.
[00:08:19]  Pilots aren't going to stop me.
[00:08:21]  I don't wrestle them. You can't wrestle your pilots.
[00:08:24]  Can't I? I bet I can.
[00:08:27]  How will you land? How would I land?
[00:08:30]  Jump. You're a wrestler, you learn how to fall.
[00:08:34]  Thank you very much. I love wine.
[00:08:36]  It's my favorite. He hates wine.
[00:08:37]  He hates wine.
[00:08:39]  He's lying. He never orders wine, ever.
[00:08:44]  I would put the bottle here.
[00:08:46]  More booze, please. Ah, wunderbar.
[00:08:51]  Love wine. You speak German?
[00:08:54]  Uh, a little bit.
[00:08:55]  What language do you speak?
[00:08:57]  German, English, Spanish, Portuguese.
[00:09:01]  I speak Romanian, Polish, and Slovakian.
[00:09:04]  And where are you from? Transylvania.
[00:09:06]  I'm a vampire. I'm 700 years old.
[00:09:08]  Oh, that's why you like mine.
[00:09:10]  Exactly. Mine's in human blood.
[00:09:11]  Thank you. I'm not a vampire.
[00:09:14]  And I only speak English.
[00:09:17]  Thank you.
[00:09:18]  Do you want one? Huh?
[00:09:19]  Do you want one this one? No.
[00:09:21]  Yeah, he does. No, thank you.
[00:09:22]  Yes. Do you want to try one?
[00:09:24]  Sure. No, more of one.
[00:09:25]  Thank you. Yeah. I'm going to try it here, won't worry.
[00:09:33]  Thank you. Delicious. Thanks.
[00:09:42]  I love whiten. Bye, nice to see you.
[00:09:43]  So...
[00:09:45]  Thank you for coming to my fair show.
[00:09:47]  Thank you so much.
[00:09:49]  Thank you.
[00:09:51]  Why don't you have a jacket?
[00:10:14]  Because I have my turtleneck.
[00:10:19]  Turtleneck? Yeah. It's not that cold.
[00:10:21]  Bro. Can't be that cold. Czech Republic is cold.
[00:10:23]  Can't be. Can't be.
[00:10:25]  You check the temperature.
[00:10:27]  No. So you didn't check the weather.
[00:10:29]  Can't be that cold. No way.
[00:10:32]  So where are we going? Dinner.
[00:10:36]  Alright, what type of dinner?
[00:10:38]  Kind of like Caribbean.
[00:10:40]  It's like Cuban food.
[00:10:41]  Yeah, Cuban food. They have Cuban food here?
[00:10:44]  Why? Why would they have Cubans here?
[00:10:46]  It's a plant they grow in Cuba.
[00:10:49]  I think it's so strong.
[00:10:53]  No, I'm actually very hungry.
[00:10:55]  We're actually going for Cuban food.
[00:10:57]  No, I think I know what's going to happen.
[00:11:02]  Yeah, because I just said it myself.
[00:11:06]  And I know you guys are- it's not food, is it?
[00:11:09]  It's not edible, is it? Okay, does anyone chew on it and eat it?
[00:11:22]  Alright, well, it could be a soup, but I doubt it.
[00:11:28]  Sounds like it's a Cuban. Cuban cigar.
[00:11:32]  So I'm just gonna starve.
[00:11:37]  Yeah. No, I'm starting to think that that's exactly what's happening.
[00:11:46]  As you guys keep talking, I'm more and more convinced that that's what's gonna happen.
[00:11:52]  So, this is the worst club sandwich I've ever had in my life, and it's all they serve here.
[00:11:56]  What do you expect from a cigar bottle?
[00:11:57]  I told you they specialize in Cuban.
[00:12:00]  I'm starving, and then I end up eating the club sandwich.
[00:12:02]  Here's some tobacco. I doubt they have chewable tobacco.
[00:12:08]  Luke? You should eat that crap.
[00:12:09]  It's very unhealthy. You drink old fashioned with a slice of orange and vitamin C. It's not vitamin C. You're lying.
[00:12:19]  He's a liar. I know.
[00:12:25]  Wake up. So I've been super tricked.
[00:12:30]  You tricked yourself. I didn't trick myself.
[00:12:32]  You guys said we're going to go for nice cute.
[00:12:33]  You weren't there.
[00:12:35]  Why? I didn't invite you.
[00:12:37]  It's not our fault. Whose fault is that?
[00:12:47]  Who can we blame for your personality?
[00:12:49]  Him? Her?
[00:12:51]  You? Alright.
[00:12:54]  It's my fault. It's my fault that I've got a super shit club sandwich.
[00:12:58]  Yeah, I guess the chips are okay I don't really know what to talk about.
[00:13:03]  I don't really love you.
[00:13:05]  I'm sorry.
[00:13:27]  HAHA, go hard on me That's just how it is now
[00:13:35]  Moreе, then a weapon

=== Ceremonial Dagger and Cold Beer (14:19) ===

[00:14:27]  I'm gonna get you some sleep.
[00:15:52]  It's right here, Austin University.
[00:15:54]  It's right here.
[00:16:12]  I'll be back.
[00:17:16]  All we do is booze.
[00:17:17]  And I super notice this because I'm the one who films everything.
[00:17:21]  I send everything to the editor.
[00:17:23]  Do I look like a boozer or do I look like a guy who's in Fantastic Four?
[00:17:30]  You look like a guy in Fantastic Four, but you also have the beer, so you kind of look like a boozer as well.
[00:17:34]  Because it's midday and some random day.
[00:17:36]  Do you understand that I look better than most people who live in the jail?
[00:17:39]  Yes. Do you know why?
[00:17:41]  Fear isn't booze. No, it's not from the booze.
[00:17:43]  No. All we do is booze.
[00:17:44]  We can go to Antarctica. We can do all this crazy stuff.
[00:17:47]  We can do loads of cool things. We can go to space.
[00:17:49]  No, but why booze?
[00:17:50]  We can go to space and stuff.
[00:17:52]  Like, things.
[00:17:54]  Things. We can do things.
[00:17:56]  We just keep boozing.
[00:17:59]  You're gonna see stars like a spaceman.
[00:18:00]  You're gonna shut up. I need to work to make more space for my booze.
[00:18:08]  This is shit. Decided.
[00:18:13]  What kind of store? What?
[00:18:15]  We're going to change everything about takeoff potential.
[00:18:17]  Okay. Okay. I have this idea.
[00:18:20]  Simple to implement, but I think it's going to make us go by, okay?
[00:18:23]  Because our channel, we spent, I guarantee there's not a YouTube channel online that spent more money than us and has less followers.
[00:18:29]  We get to London, he literally literally spends like 50 G's on fucking clothes.
[00:18:33]  50 G's yesterday, I'll take your clothing for the rest of the day.
[00:18:36]  Can I ask how much it is per glass?
[00:18:39]  That goes for 350 pounds.
[00:18:42]  350 pounds per glass?
[00:18:44]  Yes.
[00:18:44]  I'll take three glasses of that for the rest of the day.
[00:18:47]  You go with this?
[00:18:48]  Yes.
[00:18:49]  Please.
[00:18:49]  Thank you.
[00:19:17]  True. We spent 10 million dollars this year.
[00:19:19]  Yep. The money per follower is terrible.
[00:19:21]  Yes. So I have an idea and I think what we're going to do is we're here in Prague and we're going to start by increasing how much we spend.
[00:19:28]  No. My idea is actually going to work.
[00:19:30]  That would work. No, that wouldn't work.
[00:19:32]  My idea is camel riding through Prague.
[00:19:34]  Important camels. Wouldn't go viral.
[00:19:36]  Wait. That would probably go viral.
[00:19:37]  Think about it. Camel riding here.
[00:19:40]  I think Luke should kill himself.
[00:19:42]  That's a good idea. Okay, all right.
[00:19:44]  Well, take Covenantial Live?
[00:19:46]  Take Covenantial Live. Okay.
[00:19:47]  Okay. I'd definitely do it in the tower thing.
[00:19:51]  I think we'd go back. Quick trip to that store.
[00:19:53]  Cigarettes, alcohol, drinks at Prague Absinthe Center.
[00:19:56]  Have the time of your life. But that wouldn't be the time of my life.
[00:19:59]  So, Luke, if you care about the channel, you know you have to.
[00:20:01]  Because it would cost nothing. It would cost zero, it's true.
[00:20:04]  It's true. It costs zero dollars.
[00:20:06]  It really increased our... All right, let's go find a place.
[00:20:08]  All right. Funny joke though guys, so...
[00:20:13]  Wait, what do you mean?
[00:20:16]  What's up? I thought we were going for coffee.
[00:20:22]  The final coffee.
[00:20:25]  No, just a coffee. The last espresso.
[00:20:27]  Oh, the final coffee. No, just a one.
[00:20:30]  Like, you know, just like... What would you like to eat?
[00:20:32]  Anything you'd like to eat, you can have.
[00:20:35]  Anything. Anything in the world you'd like to eat for dinner.
[00:20:37]  Tristan, you're being too nice. This is scary.
[00:20:40]  You're worrisome now. No, it's normal.
[00:20:41]  It's your final meal. No, what do you mean final?
[00:20:44]  Why final? It's a joke, though.
[00:20:46]  We're joking. Ha ha.
[00:20:48]  Sure we are. Yesterday, he's a nerd. Yesterday, it was celebrating New Year's Eve with a good friend of ours.
[00:21:11]  And he left about ten minutes before we did, but without saying goodbye.
[00:21:16]  I said, why did you do that?
[00:21:17]  Oh, I needed a separate taxi, you could blah, blah, blah.
[00:21:20]  I said, yeah, but why did you just leave?
[00:21:22]  So I'm going to get him back, Luke.
[00:21:24]  We are just going to leave.
[00:21:26]  No, but we need to stop boozing.
[00:21:28]  Tristan, I'm dying. I don't know how you're boozing now.
[00:21:30]  What do you mean? Take Confidential.
[00:21:31]  You have no idea.
[00:21:33]  You have no clue. You cannot fathom.
[00:21:37]  No, genuinely. But, Tristan, take Confidential.
[00:21:39]  They don't understand how much booze is consumed.
[00:21:42]  Breakfast beer! So, anyway.
[00:21:45]  After I have my breakfast beer, Luke.
[00:21:47]  No, but what do you mean we're gonna leave?
[00:21:48]  Well, there are no flights. What do you mean flights?
[00:21:52]  You mean actually leave the city.
[00:21:53]  Listen, Andrew talked to me yesterday.
[00:21:55]  He wants to be Mr. Independent. I'm leaving him here.
[00:21:57]  I'm only here for him.
[00:21:59]  He wanted to be here. So let's leave.
[00:22:02]  Flights are booked. Luckily I have these.
[00:22:07]  What are these? Train tickets.
[00:22:10]  31 hours by train.
[00:22:15]  That means 31 hours of non-stop boozing with your cousin.
[00:22:19]  The ultimate adventure for you, Luke.
[00:22:23]  Sold. You in?
[00:22:25]  What does it say on the top right-hand corner of the ticket?
[00:22:28]  What does it say? It says my name.
[00:22:31]  It says Luke. Let's go!
[00:22:35]  I can't do it.
[00:22:37]  I'll show you training. We're getting the fucking training out of here.
[00:22:42]  I can't be convinced.
[00:22:44]  Luke, you feel bad and we're going to be drinking on the train.
[00:22:50]  So I'm going to go to the shop. Our Uber's here in 7 minutes.
[00:22:52]  There's a shop around the corner. What do you want?
[00:22:54]  What will make you feel better? Coconut water.
[00:22:56]  Coconut water? Yeah.
[00:22:58]  I don't know. Coconut water.
[00:23:00]  Coconut water. Anything else? I don't know.
[00:23:05]  I don't know. Coconut water will make you feel better.
[00:23:06]  Water. Water and coconut.
[00:23:08]  Yeah. Uber's here, almost missed it, but I got your drink.
[00:23:15]  What do you mean, my drink? Listen, the way you said it, I have a strong feeling.
[00:23:24]  So, I got everything on your list.
[00:23:28]  Coconut water, yeah?
[00:23:32]  No, so, snow globe. I forgot exactly what you wanted, but I got lots of things.
[00:23:39]  Ceremonial dagger. I believe that was on your list, wasn't it?
[00:23:43]  No, no. This is the toy monkey you asked for.
[00:23:46]  And I know you're thirsty, so put your bottle of Absinthe.
[00:23:51]  Absinthe, and the toy monkey will crunch your thirst.
[00:23:54]  Backup beer. But not just the beer.
[00:23:57]  I also, because, I mean, how are you going to open the beer without a ceremonial pipe-smoking beer opening widget?
[00:24:05]  That's exactly what you asked for, isn't it?
[00:24:07]  I asked for water. Beer, absinthe, toy monkey, the ceremonial dagger, the bottle opener, the snow globe.
[00:24:13]  That was everything on your list.
[00:24:14]  No, I wanted water. Take off it, reviewers.
[00:24:16]  Pack me up. It's a matter of record.
[00:24:18]  It's on film, you asking me for all of those items.
[00:24:21]  I wanted water. I gave you exactly what you wanted.
[00:24:23]  I didn't want a snow globe, a toy monkey, ceremonial dagger.
[00:24:27]  Good luck carrying them. 31 hour train journey.
[00:24:29]  They're all yours now. I'm not carrying them.
[00:24:32]  I don't want that. Sorry, sorry, I went to the shop and bought you things.
[00:24:37]  That's cool, that's cool. We're multi-millionaires, so they look like homeless gypsy people.
[00:24:41]  Yes, prepared for the train journey.
[00:24:43]  Tristan, why am I, I'm just ready to money people.
[00:24:45]  When I get happy on the train, it's like this, it's like pow, two beers.
[00:24:49]  You know what fucks with me, it's like ceremonial dagger.
[00:24:54]  I'm ready all the time.
[00:24:56]  Seriously, we can't just berate of money.
[00:24:59]  We just can't fucking...
[00:25:00]  I can't. From the stupid convenience stores that they sell.
[00:25:04]  Exactly. Frog's weird because they sell this stuff.
[00:25:07]  Ceremonial daggers. Why?
[00:25:09]  Because that's the way things are.
[00:25:12]  It's a cold world out there.
[00:25:13]  And then on New Year's Day, multi-millionaires might be taking a train and they might need a fucking knuckle spike to spike your enemies, you know?
[00:25:22]  Knuckle spike. They're coming at me.
[00:25:24]  Bang. Doesn't stop them.
[00:25:25]  Ceremonial dagger in this hand.
[00:25:27]  Unsheathed. That's the way it is, Luke.
[00:25:31]  There's a whole world out there.
[00:25:34]  We're crazy people.
[00:25:35]  This is not how multi-millionaires...
[00:25:37]  We could literally have a limousine take us to a jet.
[00:25:39]  Why are we doing this?
[00:25:41]  How was my mind? You know what, Luke?
[00:25:42]  I'm beginning to sober up, and I realize I'm still too heavy.
[00:25:46]  But knuckle spikes are good for lots of things.
[00:25:48]  You can also widget open your beers with a fucking...
[00:25:53]  Ah!
[00:25:54]  Ah!
[00:25:55]  I'm so grump I might not get on the train.
[00:25:59]  I might call a private jet. Why are we doing this?
[00:26:04]  We're insane. We're insane people.
[00:26:07]  We're just leaving. Happy New Year!
[00:26:08]  We're literally leaving because Andrew just left before us.
[00:26:12]  10 minutes. Fuck him! That's what he gets!
[00:26:13]  Why am I getting convinced?
[00:26:15]  It's a cerebral dagger. Although, I really couldn't let you go on the train alone.
[00:26:21]  Exactly. I really couldn't.
[00:26:22]  Andy's going to wake up and try to find us, but he won't be aware of our...
[00:26:25]  Presence.
[00:26:29]  Luke, imagine having that little self-awareness.
[00:26:32]  You're on a train by yourself.
[00:26:36]  Giant dudes are sitting nearby.
[00:26:39]  And you're so asleep, you can't wake up.
[00:26:42]  And you're snoring super loud.
[00:26:43]  I tapped this dude on the arm.
[00:26:45]  I tapped him and said, bro, he is out.
[00:26:49]  I could murder him, take all this shit.
[00:26:51]  That's how easy it would be.
[00:26:53]  I'm fucking huge.
[00:26:54]  I could kill this guy.
[00:26:55]  He's out of his fucking mind. Who does that, Luke?
[00:26:58]  Who goes to sleep like that on a fucking train?
[00:27:01]  Someone should murder him. I'm not gonna do it, but somebody should.
[00:27:04]  Bye, Andrew. Leave early, will ya?
[00:27:07]  Oh, there's no flights. Is there?
[00:27:11]  Good ol' fucking train.
[00:27:12]  Worked for the Victorians. Railway.
[00:27:14]  31 action-packed hours.
[00:27:16]  On the way to Bucharest.
[00:27:19]  We got him, didn't we?
[00:27:21]  Fucking got him. Nice cold beer?
[00:27:24]  We fucking got him.
[00:27:27]  Is he messaging me?
[00:27:28]  He's calling me. Nah, I just ignore him.
[00:27:33]  Swiss Army knife.
[00:27:34]  Little cutting knifey. For pure opening.
[00:27:37]  Oh shit, that's the wrong thing.
[00:27:39]  Fuck. Ceremonial dagger.
[00:27:41]  To keep me feel not boozy.
[00:27:45]  Tristan, this gift really did make me feel better.
[00:27:47]  Thank you. No, I don't want beers.
[00:27:52]  But my ceremonial dagger does.
[00:27:53]  Well, I only have one beer. You think I'm fucking offering it to you?
[00:27:56]  Good, I don't want it.
[00:27:57]  Oh, you don't want beer.
[00:27:59]  I have one beer. Wait, you think I give it to you?
[00:28:01]  After the shit you pull?
[00:28:03]  I went and said to Luke, earlier Luke said, do you want juice?
[00:28:06]  I said, yes. He said, give me some money.
[00:28:07]  I gave you money. Went to the juice store, came back with one bucket.
[00:28:11]  Listen, this is a psyop.
[00:28:12]  This was a psyop. It's a psyop.
[00:28:17]  You're a piece of shit.
[00:28:19]  Now I'm a juice to drink a fucking beer.
[00:28:21]  He said no. I distinctly remember asking.
[00:28:24]  Why would I say no to juice?
[00:28:25]  I thought it was weird.
[00:28:27]  No, I agree.
[00:28:30]  You are a liar. You're lying to yourself.
[00:28:33]  Would a man with a ceremonial dagger lie to himself?
[00:28:36]  I have a ceremonial dagger, mate.

=== Ceremonial Blade (02:16) ===

[00:28:47]  No, but it's for ceremony.
[00:28:50]  Yeah, yeah, but mine's for ceremony.
[00:28:56]  Yeah, I'm very happy with my ceremonial dagger.
[00:29:02]  Don't stab it. There's computers in there.
[00:29:06]  Scare to be stabbing through your trench of computers.
[00:29:08]  Admit you're scared of my ceremonial knife.
[00:29:10]  And you're jealous. It's true because this one is completely blunt.
[00:29:18]  It's ceremonial. You can see.
[00:29:20]  It is ceremonial.
[00:29:21]  You can do a ceremony while I cut the enemy off.
[00:29:24]  It's true. They wouldn't see that coming.
[00:29:25]  And they would be scared of this.
[00:29:27]  To see when you just see it.
[00:29:28]  Yeah, you'd be like, ah! Yeah.
[00:29:31]  But they don't realize it's just for ceremony.
[00:29:33]  It's literally the worst shit in the world.
[00:29:36]  But I'm very happy with it.
[00:29:39]  He's gotten rid of my hangover.
[00:29:41]  This is a trick, actually.
[00:29:42]  I think everyone in take-home does should know that this gets rid of booze.
[00:29:46]  Removes it from your system.
[00:29:47]  You just need to perform the ceremony.
[00:29:49]  You need the snow globe and the toy monkey.
[00:29:51]  Let me tell you something. I paid 112 euros for a four hour train journey.
[00:29:55]  I'm sitting in the first class.
[00:29:57]  And there's some fucking sleepy, passed out, goofy cunt about two seats in front who will not stop fucking snoring.
[00:30:06]  Came on the train by himself.
[00:30:08]  Passed out snoring. I feel like robbing him.
[00:30:12]  I'm going to bed. Literally. Look, can you go show that guy?
[00:30:13]  I'm going to bed. Show the guys the guy.
[00:30:16]  Show him this guy. He's super out of it.
[00:30:34]  What level of goofy ass, no social awareness, dickhead cunt do you have to be to do that?
[00:30:40]  If he keeps snoring, I swear to God with his hands.
[00:30:43]  And we're gonna record it. I'm gonna tap him.
[00:30:44]  Yo, you're snoring. Yeah.
[00:30:53]  I'm losing my mind.
[00:30:55]  I know. I might cut my own face off.
[00:30:57]  No. With a knife. No, don't do that.
[00:30:59]  Why not? Because there's no need.
[00:31:01]  Why? Because there's no need to cut your own face off.