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| Right. | |
| I used to ride motorcycles. | |
| I have now quit riding motorcycles. | |
| I haven't ridden motorcycles in years. | |
| It's easy for me to not ride motorcycles because I have extremely fast cars. | |
| I have some of the best cars on the planet. | |
| But I used to be a massive motorcycle fan because motorcycles are cheap performance. | |
| That's what they are. | |
| You're sacrificing the safety of a car. | |
| You're increasing your risk of dying. | |
| But you get supercar performance for a fraction of the price. | |
| A $7,000 motorcycle will keep up with a $250,000 car. | |
| They're that fast. | |
| So, I understand the appeal. | |
| I certainly was addicted to motorcycles at one point because those broke, and the performance is fun. | |
| The only thing about bikes that's not as cool as cars is the anonymity. | |
| That makes it cool in some ways. | |
| Like, if I was driving on my bike and someone cut me up, I'd just come up next to them and just smash their wing mirror off and just disappear down the road. | |
| That was cool. | |
| But, because no one can see who you are, right? | |
| But in a supercar, it's cool for the other reason, because everyone knows it's you and your car is known around the city and you're flexing on the broke boys. | |
| Anyway, so I decided to quit motorcycles before I was rich enough for supercars. | |
| There was a good period in between when I didn't have a motorbike and I didn't have a supercar. | |
| And I quit motorcycles because some idiot nearly killed me. | |
| And I think there is great shame in an easily preventable death. | |
| If I die by something I could never have negated, fine. | |
| But if I die because You know, I was just sloppy, or I was amateur, or I could have avoided it. | |
| I think that's quite an embarrassing thing to happen. | |
| What happened to Tate? | |
| Oh, he died. | |
| How? | |
| Oh, well, he was riding his motorcycle around and someone hit him in a car. | |
| It's kind of like, well, all Tate did was ride that motorcycle around all day, every day. | |
| Eventually, someone's going to hit him. | |
| It's kind of stupid, right? | |
| So anyway, I'll tell you a quick story. | |
| Very, very quick story. | |
| I'm riding my motorcycle. | |
| I am, of course, not doing the speed limit. | |
| Why the f... | |
| Fuck would I do the speed limit on a superbike. | |
| I have a GSX-R 750. | |
| It's yellow and black. | |
| I used to do wheelies all the time. | |
| But for once, I'm not even doing wheelies. | |
| I'm behaving myself. | |
| Just cruising down the road. | |
| It's a 30, I'm doing maybe 90. | |
| Now, when you ride motorcycles, you don't just pay attention to the road. | |
| You pay attention to, like, the holes in the road. | |
| You watch people's faces to see if they turn their heads and look at you. | |
| I actually think this is the reason where 6 or 7 cars, 6 or 7 years of supercars have never had an accident, ever. | |
| Because I can drive. | |
| Like, I can actually drive. | |
| A lot of people think, all men think they can drive, right? | |
| I can actually drive. | |
| And I pay attention for years of motorcycle riding. | |
| So, I'm going this way, car comes up to the junction here. | |
| As I'm coming down the road, I watched the lady look this way, look directly at me, and then pull out. | |
| She looked directly at me! | |
| Let me once again give you that beautiful visual demonstration. | |
| Me coming down the road, she comes up, stops, because it's my right of way, She looks this way, she looks directly fucking at me, and then pulls out. | |
| Unbelievable. | |
| Now, I didn't go into the side of her car. | |
| I slammed the brakes, but obviously the back of the bike now, because I've got too much pressure going forward, the back wheel of the bike is like fishtailing, but I managed to go around the car. | |
| So as she's pulled out here, I've managed to kind of go around the car and hit the curb here and crash. | |
| And I woke, I don't say woke up, I don't think I was knocked out. | |
| There was a period where I could hear, but I couldn't move or really see or really understand what was going on. | |
| But it wasn't, it couldn't have been long, three seconds, maybe four seconds. | |
| And everything's black. | |
| And I hear the noises of the bike still tumbling. | |
| And I'm laying down. | |
| And I was flat on my back. | |
| And just like Jesus, I was winded, right? | |
| I couldn't breathe properly. | |
| I was winded. | |
| But I've been winded lots of times in fighting, so I was used to ignoring that. | |
| So just like Jesus, even though I was winded, I sat up. | |
| I had full leathers on, full helmet, everything. | |
| Looked, looked, didn't see any cuts in my leathers, no blood. | |
| And I stood up. | |
| Like from the Bible. | |
| Now my bike is obliterated into pieces and it's at least 200 meters down the road. | |
| And I'm about 30 meters from the car, which is now stopped in the middle of the road, because she saw it happen and she stopped. | |
| So I got up, I turn around, I look at this bitch, because that's what I'm going to call her, because she almost killed me, and I walked back towards the car. | |
| And you know what the most upsetting thing about the whole incident was? | |
| She had the most stupid expression on her face. | |
| Because, obviously, she just pulled out. | |
| Because females have low IQs. | |
| Right? | |
| Because women are stupid. | |
| She didn't even realize anything that happened. | |
| So she just pulled out on me. | |
| And then all of a sudden, she just pulled out. | |
| And all of a sudden, in front, she's just seen a motorcycle just go... And blow up. | |
| So she stopped the car in panic. | |
| And when I walk over to the car, it's very difficult for me to replicate her face. | |
| But it was just absolute shock. | |
| It was just... | |
| Like a fish. | |
| I remember thinking, you look like a fish. | |
| Her mouth was open. | |
| Her hands were still on the wheel. | |
| It's been a good minute by now. | |
| Must have been, since I got up, did my Jesus act, crashed, everything. | |
| And she's just like, frozen like a fish. | |
| I walked over and said, what the fuck? | |
| Started screaming at her. | |
| And she just, like a fish. | |
| And I thought, is this the person who's gonna kill me? | |
| I mean, if 12 tigers attack me, and I manage to defeat 11 in unarmed combat with my Aikido, and the last tiger gets my neck, that's a fine way for Tate to die. | |
| But for this bitch, this idiot, to kill me, that's disrespectful to the universe. | |
| Like, someone that pathetic can't kill someone as great as me. | |
| I'm the man. | |
| The worst thing about it is, if she did kill me, she wouldn't even go to jail. | |
| It was an accident. | |
| He was driving too fast. | |
| Would she even get points on her driver's license? | |
| Probably not. | |
| What would happen to her? | |
| Nothing. | |
| Stupid bitch. | |
| So I was like, you fucking cunt. | |
| And I still have my armored gloves on, right? | |
| And she's still fishing. | |
| Fish face. | |
| So I punch her window. | |
| Bust her window. | |
| Fucking stupid. | |
| I'm about to kill the hoe. | |
| She's looking at me like, I'm the bad one now. | |
| You almost killed me. | |
| I just had to go through a motorcycle crash because you looked at me and pulled out on me anyway. | |
| Now, because she's been stopped for a minute, there's a whole bunch of traffic behind her. | |
| So now all these dudes run out the car, Captain Save-A-Hos, right? | |
| Because I punched a window. | |
| What's going on? | |
| It's like, this fucking cunt nearly killed me, blah, blah, blah, blah. | |
| But they didn't see the whole incident. | |
| Calm down, mate. | |
| Calm down. | |
| Being typical fucking retards. | |
| And that was the story of it. | |
| And when I got home, I did some soul searching. | |
| I thought, Andrew, do you want to die this way? | |
| And the answer was no. | |
| Because I don't want someone as pathetic as her to kill me. | |
| I want to die in some grand, glorious gesture. | |
| You know, like on the cross, crucified, like Jesus. | |
| I just rose like Jesus. | |
| I should die like Jesus. | |
| I should not die for some fucking idiot like her. | |
| This leads into, funnily enough, About two weeks after this, I was extremely depressed because my motorcycle was all I used to do. | |
| I used to train to fight and ride my motorbike. | |
| It's all I did. | |
| Didn't ride my motorbike anymore, so now I'm in my car. | |
| Sitting in a normal car. | |
| And I watched a woman crash. | |
| Duh. | |
| She pulled out of a junction, turned, and somehow— I can't even explain to you how ridiculous this was. | |
| She came up, she pulled out of a junction, turned to turn right, and instead of just turning right, she did some kind of U-turn back into traffic and crashed. | |
| It didn't make any human sense. | |
| I can't explain it to you in a way that makes sense. | |
| I know you're sitting there thinking, no, that can't be right. | |
| No, that's literally what she did. | |
| Traffic's going this way. | |
| The traffic stopped. | |
| Traffic, she comes out. | |
| Instead of just turning right and going on her way, she comes and just crashes into this car. | |
| Female. | |
| And I sat there and I thought, how are women allowed to drive? | |
| How? | |
| Females can't drive and whenever you're in a car with a woman they all say I'm a good driver But they don't realize how shit they are They're so shit they don't realize their shit I'll see you next time. | |
| A man is good enough at driving to know he's not a good driver, but women are such bad drivers, they genuinely think they're okay drivers. | |
| It's remarkable. | |
| If you're truly shit at something, you can't even tell you're crap. | |
| Right? | |
| If you're completely death, you don't know you're bad at piano. | |
| Because you're an idiot. | |
| Women can't drive. | |
| None of them. | |
| I've never met a woman who can actually drive competently. | |
| They all just fucking make mistakes, do stupid shit they're not supposed to do, way too close to shit they could never get out of the way of, and then when something happens, it's always, well, it wasn't actually my fault. | |
| Ask every woman you've ever met if you had a crash. | |
| Yeah, but it wasn't my fault. | |
| Of course. | |
| How many have I had? | |
| Fucking none. | |
| So, it was your fault. | |
| Stupid bitch. | |
| And that's the point of this video. |