Tate Speech - Andrew Tate - Tate on Shower Gel
Aired: 2022-07-08
Duration: 05:42


=== Shower Gel Ripoff (05:42) ===

[00:00:00]  Right, I'm aching a little bit.
[00:00:13]  I feel a little bit... It's been a long time I've been away.
[00:00:17]  I've been two months on the road.
[00:00:19]  Two months I've been on the road!
[00:00:21]  From Bucharest to LA, LA to Dubai, Dubai to Texas, Texas to London, London to Belgium, Belgium to Germany, Germany to Czech Republic, Czech Republic to Slovakia, Slovakia to Romania.
[00:00:35]  So during all that time, all I was doing was two or three hundred push-ups a day to try and stay in shape.
[00:00:40]  And I got back and I did a proper workout and now I can barely move.
[00:00:44]  That's what happens.
[00:00:45]  Anyway, today is going to be a very unique Tate speech because this is going to be the first Tate speech in history I use notes.
[00:00:51]  I know that's unlike me.
[00:00:52]  Normally all the brilliant information just flows from my super brain.
[00:00:55]  But I don't want to get anything wrong.
[00:00:57]  I'd be very, very specific because the beef I have for this particular Tate speech is a particular one.
[00:01:02]  So I've already tweeted about this.
[00:01:04]  If you don't follow me on Twitter, I don't know what you're doing.
[00:01:06]  I get banned all the time, but my current Twitter is here at the bottom of the screen.
[00:01:12]  And I tweeted something which had people inspired.
[00:01:19]  My beef for this TakeSpeech episode, and I can't be as animated as normal because it's hard to move, is with shower gel.
[00:01:28]  I have a genuine problem with shower gel, and my problem with shower gel is that it's a fucking ripoff.
[00:01:33]  Everyone always uses shower gel.
[00:01:34]  What the fuck is this with shower gel?
[00:01:35]  I'm a soap guy.
[00:01:37]  Give me a bar of soap.
[00:01:38]  Oh, you can't use soap on your face.
[00:01:40]  Why?
[00:01:41]  Why can't I use soap on my face?
[00:01:42]  What's gonna happen?
[00:01:43]  Am I gonna die?
[00:01:44]  I can use soap on my face and my hair.
[00:01:46]  You can use a bar of soap.
[00:01:48]  So I'm a bar of soap, dude.
[00:01:50]  But as the world's become more pussy, along with everything else, people have become shower gel guys.
[00:01:55]  Everyone's a shower gel dude.
[00:01:56]  Oh, can you get me the cherry blossom shower gel?
[00:02:01]  Like, what happened to the normal things?
[00:02:02]  I was a coffee guy.
[00:02:03]  A coffee.
[00:02:05]  Coffee, please.
[00:02:06]  Oh, cappuccino, latte, macchiato.
[00:02:08]  Just coffee.
[00:02:09]  Hot coffee.
[00:02:10]  Coffee.
[00:02:10]  The fuck?
[00:02:11]  Soap.
[00:02:12]  Everything's just so fucking fancy.
[00:02:14]  Pisses me off.
[00:02:15]  But shower gel pisses me off the most.
[00:02:17]  Because shower gel is the biggest con in the history of humanity.
[00:02:22]  Shower gel is the biggest rip-off ever.
[00:02:24]  And I've got the statistics because I conducted an experiment.
[00:02:28]  So what I did was I got a bar of soap, and I used that bar of soap until it expired.
[00:02:33]  So the bar of soap was no longer usable.
[00:02:35]  It was a little slither.
[00:02:36]  I used up to the very, very end, and it was no longer usable anymore.
[00:02:39]  And then I got a bottle of shower gel, and I used the shower gel to the end.
[00:02:45]  Have you ever noticed that with shower gel, it never actually lathers up properly?
[00:02:49]  Like, you get some shower gel, you put it on your face, and then you get it in, you squirt some more.
[00:02:53]  And then you go and squirt some more.
[00:02:55]  Like they deliberately don't even make it lather up properly, so you keep squirting more of that shit.
[00:03:00]  People still buy it.
[00:03:02]  So a bar of soap, the bar of soap I used was 19 cents.
[00:03:05]  We're talking euros here, 19 cents.
[00:03:07]  The shower gel I used was 1.99.
[00:03:11]  Now, the soap lasted six times longer than the bottle of shower gel.
[00:03:18]  So the bar of soap lasted six times longer than the shower gel.
[00:03:21]  So bear with me here.
[00:03:22]  You have a bar of soap for 19 cents.
[00:03:24]  You have a shower gel for $1.99.
[00:03:25]  But you need six shower gels to equal the amount of cleaning power as one bar of soap.
[00:03:30]  Six shower gels at $1.99 is $11.94.
[00:03:32]  $1.99 is $11.94, which means for $11.94, you could get 62 bars of soap.
[00:03:38]  So that makes shower gel 62 times more expensive than soap is. 62.
[00:03:46]  62!
[00:03:46]  Now what pisses me off about this is the following.
[00:03:49]  There is no tangible advantage to shower gel.
[00:03:52]  If you were to look at cars, for example.
[00:03:55]  A nice car is $20,000.
[00:03:56]  A Lamborghini is $200,000.
[00:03:56]  It's 10 times more.
[00:04:02]  But it's faster.
[00:04:03]  Everyone pays attention to it.
[00:04:04]  Everyone looks at it.
[00:04:05]  Everyone stares.
[00:04:06]  It makes noise.
[00:04:07]  You get credibility.
[00:04:08]  You get prestige.
[00:04:09]  You get respect.
[00:04:10]  All that is the extra you get for paying 10 times the price.
[00:04:15]  If you had a $20,000 car and you paid 62 times the price, You'd have a fucking plane.
[00:04:21]  It would be able to fly through the sky and cross continents.
[00:04:25]  That's what happens when you pay 62 times more for a product.
[00:04:29]  $20,000 for a basic car, 62 times more, now the car can fly.
[00:04:33]  10 times more, you have a Lambo.
[00:04:35]  Shower gel to soap, there is no difference.
[00:04:38]  I'm paying 62 times more for a product.
[00:04:41]  But it does exactly the same thing as the basic product.
[00:04:44]  For 62 times more, I expect to get in the shower with a whole bunch of naked hoes.
[00:04:48]  But you don't.
[00:04:49]  You get in the shower, and you're washing yourself.
[00:04:52]  The shower doesn't wash me.
[00:04:53]  I have to wash myself.
[00:04:55]  It's bullshit.
[00:04:56]  62 times more.
[00:04:58]  What a con.
[00:04:59]  So when I point this out, some fucking bumbaclot come at me and go, yeah, but the smell.
[00:05:04]  What do you mean the smell?
[00:05:06]  Just put aftershave on afterwards.
[00:05:08]  Just use a bar of soap and then put on some aftershave.
[00:05:11]  Done.
[00:05:12]  Why are you putting on a smelling shower gel and then covering yourself with aftershave anyway?
[00:05:15]  Has that ever got you laid?
[00:05:17]  Do you rely on the smell of cherry blossoms from shower gel to convince some 4 out of 10 to play with your penis?
[00:05:24]  Is that your tactic?
[00:05:26]  That's your game?
[00:05:27]  I go to dates in gym clothes.
[00:05:30]  With no shower.
[00:05:31]  But I pull up in a fucking Lambo.
[00:05:33]  Like, I don't need to change.
[00:05:35]  Oh, let me put my cherry blossom on my face.
[00:05:37]  You're all nerds.
[00:05:38]  Shower gels for worms.
[00:05:40]  It's a rip-off.
[00:05:41]  It's the biggest con of the century.