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March 24, 2026 - This Past Weekend - Theo Von
01:42:39
#648 - Vince Vaughn

Vince Vaughn and Theo Von dissect Vaughn's new Hulu sci-fi comedy, where he plays dual characters, while reflecting on his childhood in Illinois selling toys and burying cash. They contrast the 90s "Wild West Comedy Festival" with modern Hollywood polarization, arguing for authenticity over ideological rigidity. The conversation explores time travel regrets regarding past relationships versus Bitcoin, emphasizing that personal growth requires processing emotions rather than seeking validation or rewriting history. Ultimately, they advocate for escapism in storytelling and accepting life's lessons without dwelling on mistakes. [Automatically generated summary]

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Time Text
Dating Apps and Real Commitment 00:14:52
Did you ever notice how dating apps feel like you're just kind of scrolling through a yard sale of human emotions?
I know a lot of people, good people, who want something real, like actual commitment, not just a WYD at 1147 p.m.
That's why I like this app called Upward.
It's for people where faith actually matters.
Not just, yeah, I went to church twice in 2014.
I'm talking shared values, family, commitment, integrity.
The stuff that makes a relationship solid.
What's cool is you're starting from the same foundation.
You're not three weeks in wondering, oh, you don't believe in marriage?
Because that's a wild Tuesday to have.
Upward is built for people who want to date with intention.
Like you're actually trying to build something.
Whether faith is the center of your life or just how you were raised, it helps you meet someone who's aligned before things get serious.
And look, I'm not saying I've got it all figured out.
You know that.
I'm still out here.
But if you're tired of guesswork and want something grounded in real values, this might be your move.
Download Upward and start dating with intention.
Go find your person.
Austin, Texas.
I'll be doing a show there April 1st.
That's coming up soon at ACL Live at the Moody Theater.
And I'm just prepping my material for my Netflix taping.
And so be grateful to be down there to be one of the last times to see the Return of the Rat tour.
Tickets are on sale now at theovawn.com slash T-O-U-R.
If you can make it, thank you for your support.
Today's guest is an actor.
He's known for just being that figure, that humor man, wedding crashers, swingers, dodgeball, Rudy.
And the list goes on.
His new movie, Mike and Nick and Nick and Alice, is on Hulu this Friday, March 27th.
I had a great time with today's guest, Mr. Vince Vaughn.
So do you have a place there?
Yeah.
Cool.
In fact, you've been thinking about moving recently.
That's cool.
I know, I'm kind of excited.
I'm kind of scared.
I'm always scared.
You are?
Well, when you make a new purchase.
Yeah.
I don't like to spend any money on anything.
I just like to kind of keep it somewhere.
Well, you also think until the devil takes it or whatever.
Yeah, right.
And you also feel sometimes, I think, like this is, you know, you kind of know what you have and how that works.
And now how does this change your spending and what you're doing?
Because you do always feel like, well, gosh, what happens if it goes away?
Yeah, one of my friends said something to me the other day about buying a house.
He goes, well, you could invest it in the stock market or you could invest it in a home.
He's like, you can't live in the stock market.
And that was kind of interesting to me because I was like, oh, yeah, well, at least if you put your money into a home, then if it's going up, then you're living in it while you have it.
That's right.
I mean, there's ways to look at it because I kind of looked at it because I never was educated in any of it.
So as I made money, I started to figure it out more.
But I started to look at stuff like what makes me money every month and then what costs you money every month.
And so a house is kind of both because you have your property taxes, especially here.
And you also have your mortgage if you do and the stuff that goes with it.
But it can go up in value as well.
So I started buying rental properties that I could rent out for that reason because it was tangible and I could make money every month off it.
The market, I never studied it.
But I guess if you do the S ⁇ P, I mean, I never spent my energy on that.
But a house, I'm like, this neighborhood's nice.
I think it's going up.
Okay, I'll buy something here.
Like trusting your instincts about that?
Yeah, because you're more exposed to it.
Yeah, that's true.
You're driving through it or something.
You're seeing things.
Yeah.
Like the old thing was like, this neighborhood's not, these neighborhoods are good.
Now this one's not.
Okay, I'll buy there.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, then you got to balance it with what you enjoy in your life.
You want to be happy where you're at.
Yeah, you want to get something like, I don't know.
I always had, like, I never really want to invest in myself.
I always, I'm just like a saver.
I remember I would save my money.
I would bury my money in the yard.
I was that kind of it.
I would go to people's homes and hide them.
You're a fucking pirate.
Oh, you got a fucking treasure mask.
I'm not even joking.
They had these like crown royal bags when I was a kid, and it was like the purple one with the gold.
I remember those.
And I would put my money in there and I would hide it in different places.
I would hide it at friends who had better security in their homes.
Did they know?
No, they had no idea.
I would hide it there.
Dude, we would steal people's silverware when we went to their house.
Like, we were doing like this little things we'd seen on like Home Alone.
Mrs. Jones.
Dude, if you'd like to.
I'll find out it's not silver later for sure.
Going to the pawn shop and arguing with somebody.
It's Sterling Silver.
Did you ever go try to dig it up and couldn't find it?
Oh, no.
That's good.
I always knew exactly where it was.
That's good.
You know, I would check on it, that kind of stuff.
I was a big barrier, like burying stuff to make sure that it was okay.
My grandparents had a basement growing up, and so I think that kind of added some mystery.
Basements always added mystery.
Big time.
And the scary.
Yeah, did you have a basement or no?
I did.
One time I went to everyone, left the house.
I was home by myself.
I thought, I'm going to watch a fucking horror movie in the basement because that was double scary.
And I turned off all the lights in the house because I really wanted the experience.
I wasn't good at watching horror.
I would get pressured and I'd do it and I'd play it cool.
But then I was fucking terrified.
I didn't like, I didn't like my imagination, it was too strong.
And I remember I turned this thing on and I was watching.
It was The Evil Dead.
You ever see The Evil Dead?
And I was like, that's fucking it.
I got to a point where I had enough.
And so I got up to run to get the lights, but I hit a pole and I went down.
And then your mind's really playing tricks.
Like, this is it.
It's coming in.
But I kind of crawled, got my lights on, turned off the movie.
I turned on every light in the house.
But yeah, basements are, well, they're a magical place because they can be a place of discovery, too.
Yeah.
Right?
I mean, good and bad happens in a basement.
Oh, yeah.
Well, I think they had like those cellar doors when you realized because I never put it together for the first like few times.
I was at my grandparents.
It was just a basement.
And then it was these outside weird doors that, and then like finally.
Do you like the cellar?
Like you had that little light come in and you knew you were underground.
Like the outside had a little hole area.
Well, they had like these.
Like, did y'all have some of those?
Yeah, hell yes.
Yeah.
So those the fact that those doors would open up and go down in that little staircase.
Yeah.
Yeah.
My grandparents had a garden.
They lived, they grew up in Illinois, and so they had a garden outside of Peoria, just a small town out there.
Yeah.
So from the area.
You're from the area?
Well, I grew up, my family originally was, you know, Virginia, my dad's side, and then Kentucky, but ended up in Ohio.
And then my dad was a salesman, so we ended up in Illinois.
Yeah.
Oh, nice.
What did he sell?
Toys.
Nuh.
Super cool.
Yeah.
Dude, he said toys around the house a lot.
Yeah, he had a lot of toys.
He'd give me like samples and stuff.
So samples were the best.
Absolutely.
If your parent was kind of ahead, right?
Yeah.
I mean, you had a bunch of something.
You know, it was weird.
Like, I had one friend, his dad sold Oakley sunglasses.
So he fucking would have like three pairs of Oakleys on.
Crazy.
Yeah.
What kind of toys did y'all have just kind of milling around?
He became a manufacturer's rep. He did well.
He was the first to go to college in his family.
And his dad had like a hundred-acre farm and would work in the, and on a, in a, in a steel mill.
But my dad was the first to go to college.
So they kind of moved us to better schools.
That was their thing.
We kept moving to get to better schools, but we weren't prepared for that because we didn't, I didn't know what a tutor was.
Like no one had a tutor.
So we moved to area that was more academic and exposed to stuff, which was good.
But he sold like I love that.
I don't think he sold this.
He might have, but I love that evil kinieval stunt cycle when I was a kid.
But he sold like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
And like, oh, yeah, that was fun as shit.
And then he had like, God, he had like these little, like, like those kind of bathtubs.
I guess it was in the toy section, but not bathtubs, swimming pool.
But it was just a big plastic circle.
Remember those outdoor?
Yeah, were they hard ones or the soft ones?
No, they were just like these.
The rigid ones?
Yeah, but they would just be in the backyard in the summer because no one had a pool.
And then he sold Galoob toys.
Whatever they sold, yeah.
Pull up that stunt cycle for me, can you?
Evil Knievel.
Did you ever have that?
I don't think so, dude.
That was so cool.
You'd pull the thing and then it would take off.
Oh, that thing.
That thing was dope.
Dude, you know.
He was jumping shit and never making it.
Yeah.
But you were like, you would watch why World of Sports.
And they say he's going to jump Snake Canyon and then he would crash and he couldn't move.
Well, I read somewhere that.
The Daredevil.
Back then, Daredevils were popular.
Oh, they had, yeah, well, that was a crazy thing.
Yeah, look at this.
There you go.
There's a commercial for it.
Yeah, so dope.
And it never did the shit it did on the commercial, dude.
No, bro.
It never, nothing ever did.
Nothing ever did.
Remember when they were first coming out with shit that flied, it never did.
You know what I mean?
And I wasn't good enough to, I was never, I always needed an uncle or someone to put it together.
I wasn't good at putting stuff together, were you?
No, I would take it all out and I'd get furious or whatever.
I'd Tom Sawyer.
I'd get someone that could do it.
Help me.
Oh, I see.
So you were extortionist.
Wow.
I was just, you know, I'd do certain things for them or could help, but I needed help with this.
You know what I mean?
I knew my limitations, Theo.
I'm trying to think of what we had.
We had Rambo.
Rambo was dope.
I played with toys till I was older.
I played with toys young.
I love toys.
Did you?
Yeah, I'm trying to think of what toys we had.
I'm just trying to think about it.
Oh, the wrestling figures was huge when I was a kid.
Super huge.
I played with Smurfs, too.
Did you ever play with Smurfs?
We would watch Smurfs, but the collectibles are Smurfs.
The collectibles?
Well, they had like those little Smurfs you'd buy.
But looking back, I don't think the Smurfs ages well.
They didn't do it.
Yeah.
Gargamel was just weird.
I think he got a little bit.
One lady, Smurfette.
They only had one going down.
And there was that.
So, yeah.
There was sort of a, bring up Smurfette.
She was kind of, she was cute, but she didn't have enough.
She had a girl next door going.
She didn't have enough body on her.
No.
None of them did.
Yeah, you're right.
That's a good point.
But what was Gargamel doing there?
Remember they had this?
He was just a bad guy.
Yeah, but it seemed more than that, though, to me.
I've seen it.
They say that there's like a whole like dark kind of thing behind it.
There's some stuff with Smurfs being really bad.
Oh, really?
I think so.
Yeah, there's some.
Like a conspiracy theory.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, there's all those Disney had the secret cocks in the movies.
Remember that whole thing?
Yeah.
And they did, by the way.
Did they?
I think you could find those in there.
Everybody looked at it.
Did you ever smoke cigarettes?
Oh, yeah.
Remember Camel?
They have that weird stuff on the Camel cigarette.
It looks like a guy, I think, who's naked or something, right?
I don't know.
Put up those Camel cigarettes.
Remember, you could make out the outline of a guy.
With a wiener?
I think so.
I think if you look at it hard enough.
You look at anything, you'll see a little bit of cock, I feel like.
You know what I'm saying?
If you mill around a gas station.
Get up there and see it.
Dude, you spend 40 minutes at a gas station.
You'll see somebody's cock.
You're looking for it.
Let's see.
I'm looking at old boy.
Look at his hands are on his hips like this.
Same shit here.
Let me see that hole.
Looks like, yeah, right there.
Look at Planet State.
Yes.
That ain't shit.
I'm telling you, that's something.
That's a guy with a, dude, just like.
I think that's just a dude standing up.
No?
Dude, there's a picture of a guy smoking like, uh, any, I mean, I'll tell you this, though.
If that were like 15, 20 years ago, then yes, we would all think that now this is.
Did you ever hear shit too, like pop rocks and Coca-Cola, make your stomach blow up and all that?
Yeah, or they'll kill a Bichon or whatever if you give them to him.
Yeah, totally.
Oh, yeah.
We were bored.
We didn't have the internet.
We were making shit up, bro.
We were hearing like Rod Stewart had to get his stomach pumped.
And weren't you hearing all that?
Oh, yeah.
They said Richard Gere was like working for a like, like had a hamster.
You had a handful of people.
I don't think that's true.
I don't want to discourage nobody, but I think this was the stuff going around.
Yeah, that was a great rumor.
That was Camel cigarettes.
Had some fucking naked dude on it.
That's what was in the news.
That's a rumor.
That was the news, baby.
That's crazy.
I do miss when they had more imagination, though.
Even like you're saying, that was something interesting you said.
Like, when you're in the basement, your imagination, if it was big, it could be a blessing and a curse because it could really create the darkness, too.
I never thought imagination is both.
But yes, I think if you have a great inner life, like, would you talk to yourself a lot?
Oh, yeah.
It would be harrowing.
I would be like, you're a piece of shit.
I know.
Sometimes good.
Yeah, occasionally.
Sometimes like Merry Christmas.
I remember.
I remember one time leaving a situation with older kids and not loving the exchange.
And I was kind of walking my bike back and just kind of talking out loud and playing different sides of the conversation.
And there was one of the boys that happened to leave at the same time and he was behind me, really hearing me kind of have this conversation.
And I kind of, so then I kept talking, but steering it with a different kind of point of view to kind of hide the fact that I was just working out out loud.
Like I kind of saw him, but I made it, I kept going, but steering it in a place where I felt more comfortable with what I was saying.
Like you were like just making up things that made sense that would have made it justifiable to him.
Yeah, or not seem as nuts, you know.
Oh, dude, one time me and my friend, we got in a fight or something in a ditch and with some other kids.
And then we were riding our bikes leaving.
And I think we got the fight was pretty even, but we kind of went to like high five like that.
And our hands got kind of stuck together while we were riding our bikes.
So it just looked like two dudes just like holding hands up in the air.
I'm proud of it.
Yeah, bro.
But it's everyone should see this.
It seemed like we're like a couple of Harvey Milk fans just like leaving a speech.
Triumphant.
Yes.
We seemed a little too triumphant.
Like, and I still, our hands got locked, and we were riding our bikes with the other hand just holding our bikes up, both riding the same way.
So we couldn't let them go.
So I'm sure to these dudes, it looked like, oh, these dudes are a couple of zests.
But really, you were really wanting to not damage the friendship over the fight.
Yeah, so you were overly connecting and making up for the fight.
Well, the kids we had fought were down the street.
Oh, so you guys were celebrating how you did.
We were kind of celebrating.
Well, I don't think we did that great, but I think we just went to do a high five.
You were in it together.
No one ran.
Right.
And our hands got locked.
So I'm sure they looked and they're like, oh, we just beat up these two gay kids, probably.
And I'm not saying that, but that could have been what they think.
You don't know what they were thinking.
You're just saying it was possible.
I know what they were thinking, and that's probably what it was.
I think like that.
Yeah, dude.
I'm super nostalgic.
Yeah.
I try to, I can be, but you got to move on, too.
I think it's good to reflect on that.
I think it's good to be where you're at.
Yeah.
Both.
When you were in college, did you like living in the dorms or anything?
Well, I never went to college.
Oh, you didn't at all?
Oh, yeah.
I went to LSU.
I went to.
Oh, I got a lot of friends who went there.
My friends.
Nostalgia vs Moving On 00:14:10
College Hayden.
Oh, I know Hugh, dude.
I met you with Hugh before.
Hugh's my guy.
Is he still alive?
Yeah, good.
Fucking Hayden's the greatest, isn't he?
Yeah, you can.
I go down and watch the games.
I'll go watch LSU with him.
I always have fun going to those games.
Yeah.
Maybe that's where I've seen you at the end.
Yeah, it could have been.
He's a great guy, Hugh.
Hugh knows everybody.
Oh, he knows everybody.
He's like the glue of New Orleans, probably.
And the better than Ezra guys.
Those guys are great.
You know those dudes, yeah.
Yeah.
Kevin Griffin, I see him.
He has a big festival over there in the Pilgrimage Music Festival that he helped start.
Yeah, Hayden was friends with all those guys, too.
Oh, dude, you met Drew Brees?
Yeah.
He's a terrific guy.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, because Hugh's friends with, I got to meet a lot of those guys.
Hayden is, you know, obviously friends with a lot of the Saints and stuff too, and Mickey Loomis and those guys.
And Hugh's friends with all my ex-girlfriends somehow, which is interesting.
But he was the best-looking guy.
Yeah.
I mean, he was a good-looking guy.
He makes friends with.
Yeah, he does good.
Yeah.
I don't know if they're just friends.
I don't know.
I'm not.
I'm insinuating.
I think it's all groovy.
I don't think there's any strings, but I'm just saying it may not have just stayed like they might not just been sitting down playing Canasta with each other.
They may not just be hooking up and playing rummy cues.
I mean, there might be some connections going on.
Yeah, I'm sure.
Hugh was just like, yeah.
I mean, he was just, everybody knew him.
I just texted with him yesterday.
Oh, you really?
He's a good guy.
You guys keep in touch a decent amount.
I do, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
It's well, it's just so fun down there.
It is fun down there.
I was supposed to be.
Did you think about going to going to when you when you left here, did you think about going there?
Oh, going back to Louisiana?
It's a little too slow down there sometimes, you know?
And I can't.
How much did stand-up weigh on where you relocated to?
The ability to get up?
That's a good question.
It didn't.
I was doing like a tour.
So at that point, most of my sets, I was like going out of town and doing like four nights and then coming back.
Like to like, we go out.
So most, I wasn't getting up and practicing as much as much as I was just doing a tour.
So you would go take out on a tour material that you hadn't workshopped.
Oh, that I had.
But it was like this tour.
And Toring up going for like three years because we kept finding more markets to go play.
So we'd play like smaller and smaller markets.
So you were changing material slightly, but you kind of had your base and you're just hitting areas you hadn't had.
Gotcha.
And it was growing.
I was performing like Fortnite's a week, but I was just on, it was like in venues and like, as opposed to just doing practice.
How does that get as you get older, the road that way, that kind of longevity?
Is it something you're still excited about or does it become more of a job?
It definitely becomes more of a job and you have to take more breaks.
I didn't realize it, you know?
Because you got to fill up your tank.
Well, yeah, yeah, you got to fill up your tank.
Recreate recreation, recreate.
Do you bring a crew with you or do you go solo?
I take a tour manager, a couple other comedians, and then we'll bring like a, for some of the venues, we'll bring like screens and a truck.
So we have like one.
Are they people you enjoy and spend time with?
Yeah.
That's good.
You need that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But then that can become unhealthy too.
Spending too much time with them?
Well, yeah.
I mean, you kind of become a circus and it's good because you have each other, but then you kind of are so with each other so much.
Oh, yeah.
You can get a like family fight type of thing.
You need a break sometimes too.
Yeah.
I guess as you get, do you choose films based on now with you want to work with your friends?
Well, I have kids now.
So that's once you have kids, that really becomes your priority.
I have so many great friends that I just don't see that often because we're on different cycles.
You know, their kids are at different ages than mine or live in a different area.
So the family is really, and your kids become the calling card.
You know, it's always funny.
I thought of a movie I did with this, which is when your kids are real young, they're a lot of work.
Like me and my wife didn't have any help.
It was just me and her, which I really?
Well, that's how I grew up.
So I liked it like that.
As they got older and I would leave for movies, we'd have people who kind of can help her driving and stuff.
But I found that like you're so desperate to have other people that have kids your age because it's a lot of work.
So when the kids get to be three or four, if you meet other people with kids the same age, you can hang out, you know, have some, have a glass of wine, whatever, and the kids play together.
So that's nice.
But all you really have in common is your kids are the same age.
And then it feels like a good idea to go on spring break with them because that's easy.
You can put the kids, can do stuff together, and the parents could hang.
But then you can realize that you have very different parenting styles.
Have you been in some situations like that?
I think everybody has.
It's sort of funny.
But you're like, is that guy going to tell his son to stop hitting my daughter?
Or am I going to have to say something?
You know what I mean?
Like, or is that guy way too?
That guy's screaming at his son.
He's an inch from his face.
Or these guys are getting super drunk and falling down in front of their kids.
So you just don't know until you go on that trip.
What the parents are doing and how they how they roll.
Yeah.
But, you know, you kind of hang with them.
And I'm sure, you know, everyone feels that way.
So, it's sort of something you start to hang out with more people who have kids in your area because your kids' schedules are dominated by your time way more than you would hang out with friends that you had in common through comedy or through other stuff.
So, it's all the kids.
It's all the kids.
Yeah.
Have you ever been shocked if your kid picks a certain friend?
You're like, No, that's not the kid.
I kind of let my kids, I mean, I give them kind of a baseline of things to look for, and then I let them make their mistakes and go through it.
But I've been fortunate.
My kids, you know, both have pretty good friends.
I like they handle themselves well.
I get nice reports that they treat kids good.
Yeah, I get texts all the time, or we'll hear stuff saying, Oh, your daughter walked my daughter out of this situation and was nice to her.
So that makes you feel good.
But yeah, I think it's not as complicated as people make it, Theo.
I think it gets overcomplicated in a city in LA if everyone's competing to get into the right school.
Right.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, yeah.
But I think if it's just a basic idea of how you go about handling stuff, you kind of attract people that share those ideas.
But if you're competing all the time, I think you're kind of going to get in a bad situation.
Is your uh, did you choose a good wife?
I did.
Yeah, she's from Canada.
She grew up on a farm.
That's where you got to get them.
You're so funny, dude.
The way you said that was like, that's a secret code.
Well, a lot of people are like, yeah, I'm definitely looking to Canada.
Even further, I'll take something that's, you know what I'm saying, that's still on ice.
Where are you going?
I'll take a freaking Inuit.
I'll take something that's in the freezer section.
You know what I'm saying?
Something that hasn't been thawed out by some of these desperate ways of America, you know?
I tell you, it's you got good at bad people everywhere for sure.
But I definitely look for somebody who, you know, I like their base values and how they handle stuff.
I think that goes a long way because a lot of parenting is problem solving.
Yeah.
Working with each other.
Yeah.
And they have good posture up there in Canada.
You notice they have the best posture.
I haven't noticed that.
Watch Canadians when they go by.
You could barely even see them.
They're so interesting.
Just horizontal, longitudinal.
You'd be even a little surprised you don't see them like Africans with that, like, you know, carrying shit on their head.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you remember that?
They always have a basket carrying.
Walking around real casual because their posh was great.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
And someone would even like if the ladies would get pissed, they would be like, but not even spilling anything.
Not a freaking melon would fall out of the basket.
Oh, dude.
I remember I went to South Africa a couple times and you would see a lot of people walking and they would, that was how they would travel to stacking on the dunk.
I'd never been to South Africa.
That was so nice.
You liked it?
Yeah, because there's just so much going on, you know.
Yeah, just like it's beautiful and amazing.
And there's these beaches and then it's all this insane history.
Were you there for a vacation or work?
I went there one time in Johannesburg to do a comedy festival.
I went once when I did this thing called Semester at Sea where you like went as a student like on this boat and we went there.
Yeah.
And you ever go somewhere for work and then say, I want to come back first when I have some downtime to hang.
That's cool.
That's the great thing about our work is you get to travel.
Yeah.
I find that to be a great education.
Oh, yeah, for sure, dude.
Going to Vietnam or whatever.
I'm trying to think of some other neat places.
Yeah, what's a place that you filmed in there?
You were like, wow, this kind of blew my mind.
Even if it was an American city.
Yeah, there's been a lot of them.
I mean, I remember going, you know, as a kid, getting to go to New York and actually living there was a big, very different for me, obviously, than I lived there for a while.
Oh, you were acting then or not?
I was, yeah.
I never really traveled anywhere, bro, until work took me there.
Like for us, a vacation was in a, you know, we would get in a station wagon.
Where would y'all go?
We drive to Florida or Arizona.
Dude, Florida.
You try not to get grounded because everyone's hopped up on sugar and shit and you're crowded in and you try not to get in trouble in the back.
But we didn't really, you know, we would drive both places for spring break.
I never left.
I had relatives in Canada from my mom's side.
So we would go up there, but I never went to Europe ever.
Yeah.
Until I had gone for work for sure.
Did you?
No, dude.
We didn't know even know about Europe.
The guy, the janitor that drew the map on our like cement at our school, left out three states of it, dude.
So there was like people were like, what is happening?
Like, how does that happen?
They just, you know, they were.
You wouldn't know because they didn't put them down.
Yeah.
Well, I think it was somewhere, some of it, I think, Maine.
I knew that Maine was missing.
I didn't want to call him out because I felt kind of bad for the guy.
But anyway, yeah.
So we weren't going to Europe, dude.
I remember Canada, they didn't even have it when I was a kid or whatever.
They had like a picture.
I remember in our classroom, they had America.
Yeah.
Because it was very, everything was very American then, very like, we are America.
And then they had a picture of a wolf like chasing a boy.
And that was Canada, like chasing a cold boy.
And that was like what we thought was going on outside of there.
And Florida was the greatest place you go in the world.
If somebody went to Florida and they came back to school in a shirt on said Florida, you were like, oh man, you killed it.
They are so rich.
Totally.
That's nice.
You guys would drive all the way from Illinois down to Florida.
Yeah, we have relatives in Ohio.
I go see my grandfather had a little hunt, a little farm.
What kind of animals did they have over there?
He just had cows.
He just had cows.
I remember.
I like cows.
They're warm.
Yeah.
I remember as a kid, I was like in first grade and we were studying the pilgrims.
And, you know, the pilgrims were all in black and white.
And so when I we drove from the farm to go see my grandfather, I never saw him much.
But when you get to the smaller roads, they're like this narrow.
You know, there's, you can't get around.
There's just two, two lanes, and those country roads are smaller roads.
And we were behind Amish.
I'd never seen Amish people.
Oh, yeah.
Never knew.
I'm travelers.
I thought they were pilgrims.
Wow.
So you had a bunch of kids in black and white in the back of the carriage, you know, kind of staring at us.
Like you couldn't break eye contact because they're looking right at you.
Yeah.
They're fucking slow, bro.
They're not moving.
Like this horse is not excited.
And we're sitting behind him.
We had like a Lincoln Town car or something.
My dad was driving.
And it was so slow going.
And I remember going, why won't these pilgrims get out of our way?
And my dad lost his mind.
He pulled the car over and took my head off.
You're no better than these people.
Who are you to talk like that about someone?
But he didn't realize.
Like, I really thought they were pilgrims.
Wow.
I really thought that that was a pilgrim because I had not a I couldn't even understand.
Of course.
What?
These people living not touching electricity.
You know what I mean?
But my dad's great.
And my mom, but they were real keen on, you know, making sure that you were.
I think because they moved me to a nicer area, they were real big on making sure I wasn't, you know, feeling better than anybody.
But I think he got that one wrong.
I think he thought I was making fun of these Amish people.
I didn't know what they were.
Yeah.
You're like, this could be Christopher Columbus's children or whatever over here.
And they just, you know, they're all hopped up on cheese curds and they're slowing down.
They're slow as fuck and we can't get around them.
Dude, that's hilarious, bro.
Yeah, that's kind of what we had in our classroom.
We were super pro-America, too.
Everything was.
It was taught in that way.
The pledge of belief.
It was good.
Hell yes.
Me too.
I liked it.
By the way, I love it.
I did too.
Yeah.
Well, it kept us together.
It was like one thing you had in common.
It was like, if you, at a certain point, if you don't have anything in common, if you take away things that people have in common, then they don't have anything in common.
I still feel the same way.
I still feel like it's the best out there.
Not that it's perfect.
There's a lot of stuff going on.
I think, I don't think we even, I don't know how much control everyone even has over it, but I still love the idea of it.
Well, a lot of people are going to homeschool now, too.
That's it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's more parents who have switched to homeschooling now than even during COVID.
I did some of it.
You did it?
My daughter in first grade, we did it.
I did some.
You know, I thought that's easy to teach, though, dude.
Traveling the hardest.
Oh, you did?
I had it.
I hired a lady that was good.
Yeah.
I get a curriculum, you know, and then I'd have a pick a curriculum that I like.
I had a lady.
But the first year she was by herself, which she'd look at me when I'd leave her in the classroom, like, fuck this.
No one wants to be sitting by themselves.
So then I found a public hybrid school where she would go two days a week.
And then I moved her to a local Catholic school.
And now she goes to a big public high school and she's doing great.
But for all the same reasons, you start looking at this stuff and figuring that you want to try to give an education that is not so drowning and beating them down.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Not really exactly.
I mean, let me think about beating them down.
Well, meaning everything was taught from a place for a while, like pointing out everything bad and you can't say this.
You can't feel this way or so much guilt education.
Oh, you're bad to feel this way or that way.
And so I didn't, I thought it's just too heavy.
And also like just a hatred of anything.
And I just, I always, you know, like it, an optimism, positive.
And why not share different ideas?
Why not have differencing of opinions and create an environment where you can talk about different things?
Yeah.
It feels like there's a lot.
Yeah.
Like kids were just feeling bad about themselves.
Like, we did this or our people.
Like, what are we doing?
I'd go to my kids and say, when I would get stuff, I'd say, this is not the history of how this shit started.
Smart Crypto Trading Assistant 00:03:01
This is not real.
We didn't invent any of this shit.
You know, so you'd have to kind of go and that's a lot of work.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, because in your kind of reprogramming, I bet.
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Marriage Goals and Life Updates 00:14:01
Where are you at with?
marriage and kids?
I don't have a marriage right now.
Someone that you are serious with?
No, but I would like to get there so it'll happen sometime soon.
What's your process for that?
That's been the problem.
I just haven't really, I've been working so much that I didn't really focus on it much, but now I'm trying to focus on it more.
How old are you, if you don't mind?
I'm 45.
Yeah.
So I'm growing a dynamic.
I'm not going to die soon, but I'm going to, you know.
You got time.
I think the thing that happens is, is we're so focused on the career and it takes up so much time.
And it's easy to put that to the sidelines.
But then as you get older, sometimes the joy or the things we got from the career aren't as high as they were.
And you start to look at family and the idea of it and say that would be fun.
Yeah.
So you take kind of the same approach that you take towards your career and you start to put those ideas on meeting somebody.
Yeah.
And then you start to work at it in the same kind of way.
And I think my opinion, sometimes what are the things I'm doing that are good?
What's not good?
What's a good thing to bring to a relationship?
What's not working on yourself in a weird way?
You'll come in contact with somebody more than I got to go to the right class or go out during the day.
It's more about doing that kind of work on yourself.
And then I think you'll kind of attract somebody in a similar mindset.
But I would say put, don't put it off.
Just focus on it a little bit in the same way that you've done with your career.
Did you have to do that in your like?
Yeah, I got to a point like you did.
And I thought, at first I thought, you know, maybe you don't get all the cards in life.
Like maybe I was so not focused on this.
Right.
It just doesn't work out.
Now I'm older and I wish I would have gotten started sooner.
But then I thought, you know, I'm going to ask God for those years back.
Like I can get those years better than I would have had them if I'm asking for them now because now I'm wanting that.
Does that make sense?
So now that you want it, you say, why can't I have it now in whatever way it looks for you at 45?
Yeah.
Yeah, I think you're right.
I think the more I just keep realizing it's not me like, because sometimes they're like, I don't really want to go out or go do this thing or something, but maybe I'll meet somebody, right?
And maybe I'll, but then it's a lot of times I'm still meeting somebody with the same kind of, I'm showing up with some of the same problems that I still that have prevented me.
So I think you're right about instead of like out there metal detecting, maybe stay home and work on the magnet a little bit.
But I think do it with grace too.
You can say, you know, I don't want to do this.
This would be better.
What do I look?
And I also, I think you go, what do I want in a person that I'm going to be married to?
What do I want and what don't I want?
Like just thinking about it.
It's almost like the same as a stand-up.
What kind of venues do I want to play?
What kind of podcast?
What do I want to do?
And by making those decisions, you can manifest something you're excited about.
Yeah, I think a good mom, that's what I want to have.
A wife, that's a good mom.
That's probably the most important thing.
Did your wife have to introduce you to her dad or whatever, like they do in the movies or whatever?
They were kind of, I met them pretty quickly.
I did call him and said, I'm going to ask her to marry.
And I think he was appreciative of it.
But they weren't as much like that.
I was raised like that.
Were you?
No, dude.
There was like a lot of domestic abuse in our area and people like hiding drugs in each other's bedrooms and stuff like that.
So it was more.
Those are relationships that aren't going well.
Yeah, pretty much.
But I'm saying you would want to, you know, the family.
Yeah, yeah.
I would like to have like a family.
You know, I'm okay with like people fighting at night before they go to bed.
Show me a normal family, I'll show you a liar.
Everyone's gonna go through their bullshit.
You know, no one's like fucking killing it.
You know what I mean?
Everyone's got their shit they fight about.
There's days anybody's mad at anybody, so that's never gonna go away.
You're just trying to aim it a little better, yeah.
Yeah, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, just shoot a little bit and a little bit.
I just want my arrow to end at least in a different area, yeah, yeah.
But, dude, yeah, I remember one time we were so mad at our mom and we were like crying, we're all crying, and we try to like put all of our tears in like a little jar, and we're gonna take them to the police and be like, Look, what's happening at the house, but they won't stay in there.
Like in the morning, they were gone or whatever.
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah, yeah, but I remember that.
I remember I was like, Were you real tight with your mom?
No, we weren't that tight, but we're tighter now.
That's good.
Yeah, I just went and surprised her for Valentine's Day the other day.
That's nice.
We had a nice time, dude.
You have brothers and sisters?
Uh, yeah, I got a couple brothers and sisters.
Close, it's gotten better over the years.
Yeah, yeah.
What about what do you got?
Same, so older sisters, and uh, I'm and you were the boy, I was the youngest, yeah.
And they were older sisters, yeah.
No, did they ever have friends come over and you're just like oggling or whatever?
Or when you put on the five or six years older, so no, I was the best.
I would sometimes get thrown under the bus to look cool for the older friends, you know, like you'd hang out and play, and then when the older friends would come, all you weren't included.
That's normal shit, yeah, yeah.
Go hide, Vince.
Yeah, did they call you Vince, or is that did they call you?
They called me Vince if they weren't mad at me, and then they'd call you anything.
We fights like crazy younger, like you'd be hot, and then you'd be friends and you'd love each other, you know, like anything.
Yeah, you'd really go at it when you go.
I've did you have this sometimes when you get in a fight with your siblings, it's really like a game of tag.
You'd be so pissed and you'd hit somebody, but then you'd be afraid because now you got them.
So then you they'd turn around mad, and now they try to come to get you real bad, and you were trying to get to the door to shut it.
And then if they got you, it would go the other way.
Yeah, so it's like whoever got the other one hard last is kind of how the fights would go.
Yeah, it would end when they everybody brought it to mom.
And then seeing kids run around their mom is one of the funniest things, you know?
Yeah, like they're hiding.
It's so funny when you watch it, you kill with their mom sometimes, and they're just like, you know, they're moving in between the moms, like they're just running, you know, they're all like, or they're fighting around the mom.
That kind of shit's fun.
Or even how kids play hide and seek.
Like an ostrich, their ass will stick out, but their head will be behind the curtains.
You ever seen kids play hide and seek?
Oh, dude, sometimes a kid will just sit there and cover his eyes.
He's laughing wildly.
Yeah, dude, we could see you, dude.
Thank God there's not a kidnapper after the kid.
Yeah, we didn't have, I think we had some, we had a decent amount of like.
They used to have a law that they would put like if you was like a sex offender or whatever children sex offenders, you had to go around and go door to door right, which was the worst because we all we lived at home, our mom was working, so it would just be.
These guys would come and they'd be like I have to let you know, I live in the air, i'm a sex offender.
It would just be us kids, I live in the air, i'm into super young guys, just letting you know mom, but mom would be gone and that was like at every house.
I'm like, who put this rule together?
Yeah, now it's on an app.
Yeah, that's easier now I know, but it's weird because you're like, oh geez, this guy over here yeah, he's only a 60, maybe better not know him.
We just walk around.
We were always outside going around.
Nobody paid attention to us, dude.
Yeah, that was being living at.
That was the best.
We had this one kid named Kirby that tried to crawl through the ditch culvert one time and the government had to come and get him or whatever.
I remember.
The government had to come get him.
That government man came down to do some work.
Shit, like that was the best.
We had this dude named Milford that would drive the school bus and he was always, they were always coming and checking to see if he was drunk.
It was just like, it was, yeah, but there was nothing like that being like.
We find out stuff later that a teacher molested people and stuff.
Oh, yeah.
You find that out later.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway, that kind of took a turn.
Let's talk a little bit about.
Well, I watched your movie, Mike and Nick and Nick and Alice, yeah.
Alice, yeah.
It's cool, man.
That's cool.
The way that they shot somewhere, they slowed it down.
Yeah.
You know what I'm talking about?
Stylized, yeah.
Yeah, it was interesting.
Was that a choice that was made kind of later?
Do you have any clue or do you have anything to do about that?
It's a director who puts it all together and he kind of has a stylized point of view to do it.
But I liked it.
I thought it came out cool.
Yeah, well, it's just bizarre.
It was like, or it's just like, it made me think, oh, things can be flashbacks.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like when he would do flashbacks, you're saying.
Well, like even with the, like there's like a moment where they have that cat that's in there and they show him, but it's like, it goes in slow motion just for like a moment or something.
I just thought it was pretty style.
It was pretty stylized.
That's what I thought.
I agree.
Yeah.
And so I don't want to give too much of it away.
But so your character kind of goes back.
What can we say?
You can say whatever you want.
Just kind of a sci-fi thing where it's rated like a rated R comedy with action and it's got this kind of sci-fi twist to it.
And your character, you played two characters of you.
Yes.
Yeah.
It was kind of cool to see like, because you always wonder, well, I wonder what it would be like if you played this character in this thing while you're watching somebody in something.
But to see him play two people, it was like, oh, that's, it's like, I can't even explain it.
It was just like, it almost seemed like an experiment.
It's crazy what they do with technology now because you kind of film one side of it, then you film the other side, and they put it together like it's one thing.
The technology's gotten so much more advanced.
Was there tough moments to play like two different characters in the same thing or you didn't really think about it?
I was amazed at how different the guys actually seemed because I was like, oh, well, at one point, I'm just going to kind of get confused, but I didn't at all.
Yeah, they make them a little different because one's obviously been alive longer and you're going back in time.
But yeah, it was a different experience for sure.
So I kind of like doing stuff that's a little different.
You get bored doing the same stuff.
So anytime I'm doing something that's a little different, I like that.
So it was, it wasn't too bad.
I mean, sometimes it was just more stuff to film because you're playing two characters in a scene.
Oh, it's true.
But I like trying different stuff.
Was there, I read some of the, you were almost in The Matrix one time.
I don't know about that.
I don't remember.
I don't remember that.
There's stuff I've turned down, but I don't remember that being one of them.
Yeah.
Your first, one of your first movies was Rudy.
That's the best, huh?
That was fun.
Yeah.
Dude, I still sometimes see that guy clapping by the.
So funny, bro.
Yeah, that's so funny.
It's such a mean.
Slow crap.
Oh.
Slow clap.
Charles S. Dutton, that's the actor.
Yeah, he was great.
Yeah.
Did he pass away?
I don't know if he did or he didn't.
Let's go back to the board here.
Bring him up.
He was cool.
He was great in that part.
Oh, he was so good.
Great speech to Rudy.
Yeah.
Gratitude.
Still alive.
Hell yeah.
Come on, Charles.
Show them, Charles.
And he was in the show.
Yeah, they had a show called Rock when I was a kid that he was on.
Yeah, that guy was great, dude.
Did you ever meet the real Rudy over there?
I did.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I didn't hang out with him much, but he was there.
I said hi to him a few times.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because I went over there to Mishawaka, Indiana.
I used to go do comedy over there.
Sometimes he had a comedy club.
He owned a comedy club?
No, no, they had one on the edge of town there right outside of where Notre Dame was.
Gotcha.
And I would go.
Have you been to a game there?
I've never been to a game.
It's cool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Tradition.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, I would love to go.
Well, the grass right there, when you walk onto the campus at Notre Dame, it's like beautiful.
And then when you're off the grass, off campus, it's a little bit different grass.
Yes, totally.
It's more like the grass has been drinking or whatever during the day even.
That day drinking.
Yeah, but on campus, it's super nice.
Yeah, they take care of it for sure.
Oh, is that the campus right there?
Yeah, that's a nice picture.
Give me that one with the snow right there.
That's nice.
Yeah, that's one thing I do like about Nashville is that we do get some cold weather over there.
That's kind of a vibe.
Do you miss that about the Midwest about having cold weather?
I think you're used whatever you get used to.
I don't mind the cold.
I'm always ready to be done with it come January.
I like it for the holidays.
But come February, I'm done with it.
As a kid, I loved it.
What would y'all do?
Just go play in the snow or get a snow day.
You know, as an adult, you're scraping it off the driveway.
You're scraping your car.
It's more maintenance.
Yeah.
And getting kids ready in the snow is a lot more time.
Yeah, you got to lock them down.
You got to lock them down.
Lock them down.
And then their face is just like a thing of snot and just redness.
Like Christmas story.
Yeah.
Dude, the guy from Christmas Story, I met him with you.
Yeah, he's one of my best friend, probably.
He's my best friend.
Peter Billingsley, yeah.
He's my closest friend.
He's a great guy.
Yeah, because I met you guys.
So you guys started the Wild West Comedy Festival.
What was that?
Because that was the Nashville Comedy Festival, right?
Yeah.
Well, what was it?
I'll tell you what it was.
I had a lot of friends that were stand-ups, but there wasn't any opportunities for stand-ups.
This is in the 90s.
We did swingers.
We wrote in the script, it was the line that said, because Favreau's character was a stand-up, the next stand-up in that movie.
So he wrote the line saying in the 80s, it felt like they were handing out pilots to stand-ups, you know, at the airport.
And then it was a time where there really wasn't a lot for stand-ups.
So I just started trying to help friends of mine out that were stand-up comedians.
I did that Wild West comedy show where I went around and did 30 Days and put Sebastian was on that.
And some of you guys weren't.
Don't you just do it everywhere?
I just would go hit 30 cities in 30 days because it seemed fun to me.
So we perform every night.
We did 30 nights in a row.
But I was really trying to help some of my friends like Ahmed that I knew guys that were stand-up comics.
Oh, yeah.
John Caprillo.
I saw him last night at the comedy store.
So there was a bunch of stand-ups because there wasn't as much opportunities.
It's crazy because now stand-ups have a lot more opportunities.
Brad Ernst is on there.
I like Brett.
Yeah.
But anyway, so they started going.
But now, then what happened is the stand-ups now have a lot more opportunity.
But at the time, it wasn't as viable.
Like, I think in the last 15 years, stand-up really had this renaissance where so much came out of it.
And I look at the stand-up stuff a little bit like what happened with improv.
Like I did improv when I was a kid in Chicago when I was in high school because there was an improv Olympic that was an offshoot of Second City.
But it wasn't, it was just a place to go train and it was fun.
It wasn't that big of a deal.
I enjoyed it and I learned stuff there, but I didn't stay the whole time.
I came out to California after high school.
But as I got older, there started to be these different improv groups.
And then it became like a religion.
This improv group thought that that improv group wasn't good.
This improv group is good at sketch.
This is good at characters.
And I thought, this is fucking improv.
Like, who the fuck is talking about improv?
Yeah, it's like when mimes start beefing or whatever.
Improv Roots in Chicago 00:11:44
You know what I mean?
It's like, what's mom?
It's just comedy.
Like, what is that?
I mean, what are you talking about?
It's so fucking crazy to me.
And so then stand-up kind of went through the same thing where it started to form into like this stand-up group or this group or a comic is this.
And I thought, Jesus, it's the same shit where it starts to get too self-important.
And I think ultimately comedy is a big tent.
You can go real cerebral or you can be physical.
It doesn't matter.
There's nothing that prestigious or like a stamp of approval about it.
Yeah, I agree.
It's gotten to that place recently.
There's been like kind of like infighting.
I don't know if it's like rappers.
It's like rappers.
Yeah, it is.
It's so silly.
But everybody's afraid to kill each other.
It's weird, right?
It's just so stupid.
So I'm just saying we either either need a Tupac and Biggie friend.
We need somebody.
It's got to go real bad to get good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or it's just got to stop.
Or it's just silly.
But it is silly.
It's silly, bro.
Well, a lot of it got political too, I think.
Politics came into stuff.
I think that happened a lot over the past few years with people like attaching themselves heavily, attaching themselves to politics.
Which is part of the job because you're going to talk about current events.
Right.
But to attach yourself to somebody.
But you don't want to become part of a group.
If you're like, you're now you're a champion for one ideology.
You want to make fun of everybody.
Yeah, I agree.
Yeah.
It's happened more over the past few years, but it's always been that, well, it was for a long time, it was like, you know, Hollywood is pretty much overly kind of a liberal place.
Yeah.
And so you would have.
But not really.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
It's more like we're smart and got it figured out.
And if you don't agree, then you're right.
Then you're an idiot.
Yeah.
That's true.
It's not liberal.
Yeah, not liberal in the way that we think where it's like, hey, it's all groovy.
Right.
Yeah, it's not liberal like a hippie with a joint.
No, no.
Maybe it was.
That's pursuit of happiness.
That's cool.
Whatever makes you happy.
Right, right.
That's cool.
Maybe it was at one point, though, I think.
I don't know.
But it's definitely gotten more of the elitist take.
Like, this is our way or the highway.
I think it's changing now.
Well, do you think it's dissolving now or do you think it's just spacing out more now?
Like that's an interesting conversation, too, because I hear this from the different groups, too.
I do think that there's less control in some ways.
But I also thought, I also think that they put themselves in a corner with trying to please everybody.
You know, you're going to catch pneumonia.
You're trying to please everybody.
That's like that old Vonnegut quote.
So, yes, I think there was more of a stranglehold with ideas, but there's always been people who feel differently within that.
It's like any group, I guess.
But, but yeah, not, I think what we're saying is similar that it was never really a place where within individuals and friends, and it's we could always disagree and always joke with each other.
People my age, I disagree, agree, and you could change, we'd change our minds, we'd laugh, we joke.
But there was definitely a culture that if you didn't agree with these ideas, uh, you were looked at as bad, yeah, for sure.
Yeah, I think Hollywood Greek got more political.
I don't know if it got more political.
No, they got rewarded for it.
Yeah, they started to come out there and do it.
And I don't even know how much everyone even is informed on everything.
Yeah.
But they really like to get out there and do it.
Oh, yeah.
But it's also wild how those people will speak on one thing, but there'll be another topic that's way bigger.
And they're hypocrites too, a lot of times.
Like anybody is.
Oh, for sure, dude.
I totally agree.
Like, you'll be like, I feel strong about this, but it's a strange thing when you start going like you know better than someone.
Yeah.
That's that's when that's when it gets weird.
It's one thing to say, This is where I'm at.
Yeah.
And then hear someone else's point of view and disagree or agree.
It's another thing to be like, I'm so right.
Yeah.
And I gotta, and I'm gonna help you or condescend to you.
That's the part that no one, I mean, who wants no one wants to hang out with that?
Yeah, so it got to that.
My agent is right.
And so this, I'm going to have to tell you what they think.
You know, that's also another like, you know, that happens.
Where people are like, well, feel like they have to think how their agents are managers.
You know what I'm saying?
Well, they feel pressured to think a certain way.
That's terrible.
And that happens.
But that's the problem if you're going through life trying to check boxes like the with like Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz.
Like, let me get the broom.
Let me do this.
What is the wizard?
You're not thinking for yourself.
You're just trying to do the things you're supposed to.
But it's always better if you get quiet and do what's in your heart and do what you think is right.
That's when you carve out stuff and make your own path.
And probably the best of it can get the best stuff out of you, even creatively.
100%.
And have the courage, I think, to be honest.
Try to be.
And, you know, go out.
That's the problem I think that happened with film comedies.
And that's why I think stand-up got stronger is they, you know, stand-ups would kind of, it was easier to give someone money for a special and say, we're going to knock, that's their special.
But the studios weren't going to produce a comedy and have more of, be more responsible for supporting the making of that film.
Oh, I see.
Seriously, with a stand with a stand-up special, they can just put this is their thing.
That's their thing.
We're out of it.
We're just hiring a special.
But, but the truth is, most people, they want to laugh.
They don't want to see stuff be precious that you can't talk or joke about.
Most people can make fun of themselves.
You know, in the real world, if you don't have a sense of humor about yourself, then it's a lonely experience.
You know, you got to be able to laugh at yourself.
You can look back at stuff that you believed so strongly a few years ago and laugh about it.
So I think you got to have that quality.
And comedy is that, being able to laugh at stuff.
And I think that it was easier then to go, okay, well, we're going to just have a stand-up and that's their point of view than it was to, they got too complicated not to offend anybody with going and making a movie.
They were trying so hard not to offend anybody.
I think it's why does that make sense?
For sure it does.
I think it's one of the reasons why like I've seen a lot of why a lot of the late shows have struggled.
Because all they did during like all they did, the only person they could make fun of at a certain point was just like white redneck kind of people and it fucking tanked and then everything tanked after that.
Think about that.
But see, they never get it right.
The podcasts have gotten so much more popular with less production, less writers, less staff.
Two people working here and both of them were hung over.
And one guy is shingles.
But the place is clean.
I like that.
You keep a clean place.
Thank you.
Yeah, we did a vacuum.
But yeah, because people want authenticity.
Yeah.
And I think that the talk shows, to a large part, became really agenda-based.
They were going to evangelical people to what they thought.
You know what I mean?
And so people just rejected it because it didn't feel authentic.
It felt like they had an agenda.
It stopped being funny and it started feeling like I was in fucking a class I didn't want to take.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
You for sure.
I've been scolded.
100%.
Yeah.
100%.
And so I think that's the phenomenon isn't what they say.
They always blame technology.
But the reality is it's the approach.
You know, someone could go watch a stand-up at Madison Square Garden and they want to go because it feels dangerous.
The crowd is alive.
I don't know what Theo is going to do or say.
And I love taking that experience.
So it's fun.
I don't want to stay home and watch it on a TV because I want to experience that live.
Right.
So that's where you're coming from.
That's the main point.
And I think people are going to tune into a podcast more so because they want to feel like people are having a real conversation.
It's interesting to them.
But if you look at what happened to the talk shows and why their ratings are low, it's got only to do with the fact of what you just said, which is they all became the same show.
And they all became so about their politics and who's good and who's bad.
And it's like, imagine sitting next to someone like that on a fucking plane.
Oh, bro, you'd be like, how do I get out of this fucking state?
I would fart right next to you.
Holy cow.
You fart your way out of it.
I would.
Oh, I would for sure.
And I think.
You know the culture.
The skunk's the king of the jungle.
No one's playing with the skunk.
You can watch all the fucking videos you want.
No one's playing with a skunk.
Skunk in the food chain of the woods.
Fucking skunk is here.
You get yourself a pitbo.
I don't give a fuck what you got.
The honey badger.
The fucking skunk is the king of the jungle.
Don't bring that badass around.
Yeah, bro.
Am I right?
The devil's cologne, baby.
That's it.
Everyone can tell me the devil's cologne, daddy.
Look at that.
You can talk about whatever the fuck you want as far as an animal and velocity right there.
All hail the king.
Oh, that's right.
That motherfucker's going where he wants.
He might need a nap.
He might be like a lover that needs to recharge.
You know what I mean?
He might be like an older lover.
He might not be able to go 10 times in a day, but that one or two times, he's going to get it right.
But what's he having for lunch?
That's what he wants, whatever's around.
He could hit a spray and get everyone else to scurry.
It don't bother him.
God, man.
What's that skunk puts its tail up?
You've got a real decision to make.
What a fuck.
How much of a badass are you?
Right?
So if you brought that skunk mentality to the plane, you fucking run that shit.
Well, I'm just saying every now and then if somebody won't fucking shut up, dude.
You got to put some ass on them.
Well, you just got to be a, you know what I'm saying?
You got to be the king of the jungle.
That's all I'm saying, bro.
That's all I'm saying for sure.
Yeah.
But did you ever feel, did you, you never felt ostracized by Hollywood at all or no?
I always, I got along with people for the most and always was, you know, always had a great career.
Trying to be honest who I am.
But yeah, there's times you felt like it would have been easier.
It's almost like a career move.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You know what I mean?
But I was always the other way too.
Like, I'm not jumping on 100% this or that.
This because I have opinions on both sides.
There's shit I don't agree with at all.
Yeah.
And then there's shit I don't agree with at all.
I don't see how people could choose a side completely.
It's so crazy.
Because also once you're on a side, you're on a side.
Fuck that.
I want to be able to have the freedom and flexibility.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And also, I'm agree with this over here.
I agree with this over there.
It is what it is.
But I just, we never cared about it so much.
It wasn't our defining conversations about how I like somebody or life.
We weren't 23 sitting around talking about five taxes.
Yeah.
But I think as it started to encroach on us, for me, I started to go a little bit back here because nobody wants to be told what to do.
Or feel like everything you do has to be through a certain lens.
Or worrying about if people think you're kind or not.
Like you're not going to do that.
And especially when everybody's pretending a lot of times, because I would have friends acting one way, but then like kind of speaking another way sometimes.
Well, those are the people that are so focused on how they're coming off.
Yeah.
You know, they're worried about, and that's not a real journey.
And you're hurting in that.
I think we all go through those stages younger.
Like everyone learns that lesson.
Well, we all want to be accepted.
Yeah, but you learn younger the right way to do it.
Hopefully we never get it perfect and you learn the wrong way.
But if you're constantly worried what someone else thinks of you and you're only around them a couple hours a day, you're miserable most of the time.
You got to really try to be, you know, find the way to be yourself, but be respectful.
You know, that's the other side that I think happened is when I was a kid, if I was loud in a restaurant, my parents would say, these people didn't come here to hear you fucking scream.
Well, dude, you stared at the Amish wrong and you got bigger.
I got dog talked.
Yeah.
But now if you're mad in a restaurant, they'll say, are you okay?
And I just think it's important to be aware of how you're affecting other people.
But if you're all about you and you're right and they're bad and you're good, then you're okay to go after somebody because you're not really thinking about what that's, what their shoes are, you know?
Yeah, we've started to like make it, it seemed like the delusional isn't delusional sometimes.
Say that again.
Like, yeah, something's delusional, but if we act like it isn't over and over and we like normalize it.
Health Supplements for Energy 00:02:50
Yes.
It's almost like you said, like the boiling water, like gets a degree higher one degree at a time, you know?
Yeah, saying that like as they change the laws a little bit at a time, you kind of wake up and you go, this has gone way further than, but it happened so slowly that you're like, if they would have done this at once, I would have gotten out.
Yeah.
100%.
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Morning Routine with AG1 00:14:44
Did your fan, do you always live in California since you moved here?
No, I went back to Chicago for a minute, but and I lived in New York for a while, but I'm out here now.
And, you know, I like California.
I just get tired of like everybody.
It's like a lot of these big cities, I think, you know, a lot.
It's a lot.
It's a lot of energy.
It's a lot of energy.
It's also just, you know, you're not getting, things aren't getting handled well.
You know, there's no accountability.
It's like a bad relationship.
Yeah.
You know, it's like something, someone doesn't do what they said they're going to do and there's no, I'm sorry, or want to change.
Yeah, I agree, dude.
It's definitely gets you, I still love California.
Yeah.
You?
Oh, I just realized this is my second time back in like about three months.
But I was here like about two weeks ago.
And I do miss it more.
I just miss some of the energy.
Like I live in Nashville now and there's just less energy there.
You know, it's just different.
Right.
You know, like here you're going to meet more people.
There's more like things going on.
But you're in a great spot where you can do both.
You can enjoy your time here and you can enjoy your time here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So it's been good, man.
Yeah.
The, what did I see?
Oh, Chicago.
You said, are you a Bears fan or no?
I am.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, fucking Williams, bro.
He's, he's really great for like four and a half minutes a game.
Nice.
Yeah.
I mean, if you look at that NFC, we barely beat the Packers and the Rams barely beat us.
And then obviously, right, then they lost.
Those games were all so close, but it was exciting because we've been so bad for so long.
Oh, it's good to be good.
We were channeling through the TV.
We were like screaming like, somebody make this happen.
Who do you cheer for?
I'm a Saints fan.
So yeah.
We've had a tough time.
Do you know some of those guys?
I like the Saints organization.
I like Mickey, the GM.
I never met Mickey.
He's a great guy.
Is he?
Yeah, yeah.
He's good friends with Hayden.
Oh, he is.
Yeah.
I wonder if I have met him then.
No, I haven't.
They had a good year.
They turned around this year.
They're good.
Yeah, they talked about everybody's excited about him.
Yeah.
Who just had a baby?
Bring up a picture of his baby since we'll, since I'm a fan of their Cam Jordan's a great guy that plays over there in that organization.
He just came out and said nice things about your quarterback.
He did?
Cam Jordan's nasty.
He's fast.
He's a great, he's a fast rusher all by himself.
I would not want him chasing me.
I wouldn't even go knock on his door and run off or whatever.
You wouldn't want him coming and saying, I moved to the neighborhood and I got to register.
Yeah.
You ain't going nowhere, bro.
You ain't getting no way.
Oh, I'd be like the basement.
Touch me now and get it over.
Nothing's keeping you safe, dude.
No cellar doors are going to keep you safe.
Do you wish when you look on that on that?
There he is right there.
I know he's had a baby.
Congratulations to QB1.
When you look back at that Bears game, do you think that you wish that they would have gone too in that moment?
Like just that momentum was there.
It was amazing to hit that crazy pass.
That was the same thing.
But then we had that last drive.
All we needed was a field goal.
But we got, you know, it was the same kind of thing a lot.
We lived and died by the sword all season.
Yeah.
So I thought it was a fun year.
I would have loved to have won the game.
There's a lot of pieces to be excited about.
Yeah, just that confusion at the end.
Like, how does they not know which way the guy, like as a fan, I'm sure it's way more complicated as a player.
But as a fan, you're like, how do you guys not know what the, this is the most crucial moment?
I know.
I don't know what happened there.
I've heard different stuff.
I don't think anybody does.
And then it's almost like, was everybody just so cold they wanted to go home?
There's a little bit of that energy.
Because I think that happens a lot.
We're just like, I'm so cold.
I just want to go home.
Yeah, you'd think it was the advantage for them.
They'd be more used to it, but you never know.
Because some of those guys could be from Louisiana playing on the team.
It's not like all of them grew up in the cold.
Oh, I would.
They're all from everywhere.
I wish that teams had all the players from their state.
I think it would give us so much more of like a our state versus your state.
It used to be more that way with college, but it's that's in a in a crazy place now.
Yeah, the college gay.
It's gotten bad.
I think it's good people are getting paid.
I just don't think they figured it out yet.
Yeah.
I think we're in like the kind of the wild west years of it.
Yeah.
Do you, though, the Bears might be moving their stadium.
Did you see that?
I saw that.
What do you think about that?
Well, I'd like to see them stay, but I think they got to figure something out with the state.
I haven't followed it too closely.
What do you know about it?
It seems like, and Zach's one of our producers is a Bengals fan, but he's in the know.
It seems like it's because time is taken for Illinois lawmakers to make a better offer for the Bears.
On Thursday, Indiana pushed legislation forward that clears the way for the Bears to build a new stadium in Hammond.
Is it just because they're willing to give them more money?
I think it's something to do with economics, obviously.
So I don't know what.
I think there's a big tax incentives to go over to Hammond, Indiana.
And Hammond, Indiana isn't exactly like the coolest place.
So I think there's some people upset.
It's close, though.
It's right over the.
Yeah, and Chicago is such a vibe in that city.
I think people seem to be like, why?
And also, if you move something to a new place, then there's going to be so much surrounding.
You know what I'm saying?
They can put in all types of other things to go on.
I mean, I like to see it.
It's the second oldest franchise in the NFL.
The oldest is the Cardinals, which is from Illinois originally before they went to St. Louis.
Oh, St. Louis?
Well, it was originally the Illinois.
It was Chicago.
It was from Illinois.
That's the oldest team in the NFL, the Cardinals.
So they were from Illinois.
And then they went to St. Louis, and then they ended up in Arizona.
They're like a senior citizen.
As you get older, you start to move warmer and warmer, right?
They follow the moving habits of someone who's retired.
Oh, yeah.
But the Bears.
The Bears were such a crazy.
You know, George Hallis, it's so crazy that it's only the NFC trophies named after him because he was really the, he was the first one to get a college player to play for the NFL, the Galloping Ghost.
Did you know that?
Well, originally, pro football was just farmers and, you know, there was no well-known names because there was no money in it.
College football was real popular, but going to college was even harder back then.
And so when you'd come out of college, if you had a degree, you had a real opportunity to earn money.
Oh, you would go work.
Like, I'm not going to go screw.
I can't go screw around and be early.
I'll switch a bunch of these rednecks and I'm going to go play football and no one's watching.
So Hallis, he played for the Yankees.
He was a baseball player.
He went to Red Grange from the University of Illinois and he said, I'll give you half the gate if you come on a barnstorming tour.
We'll go play places.
And then people showed up.
They'd go watch the, they'd go watch Red Grange, who was a big-time college player.
And so when they got Red Grange to join to play with the Bears, they knew if they could get the college guys to come in, the fans would grow.
And then the college guys were more open to it because you could pay them because you'd get the fans to fill up the stadiums.
Wow.
And then when they first did it, whatever college you were from, you would play for that local team because the college would already be a fan of you.
The people in the area would be a fan.
Right, so let's sell tickets that way.
And then they started the draft after that.
But George Hallis did everything.
He was a player.
He was a coach.
He was an owner.
He beat Lombardi as a coach in his heyday one year.
He coached the team and did well.
But he started so much that's in the NFL today, Papa Bear.
He's really probably the most important figure in the NFL.
So it would be at George Hallis.
It would be a shame.
And he's from Chicago.
So it would be a shame to see that team leave that city with that history for sure.
But I hope they, I haven't really looked into it, but I hope they're able to figure it out and come to terms that work for everybody.
But he's an amazing figure in sports.
And they named the NFC Trophy after him, the Hallis Trophy.
Bring up that Red Grange picture.
Thank you, George Hallis, for your efforts.
Look at Red Grange.
The Galloping Ghost.
Well, that's the other quarterback you could make the argument for is Otto Graham.
He was from Waukegan, Illinois.
When you look at him, it's crazy.
I think he won, I could be wrong, but did he win seven championships in 10 years as a quarterback?
I think he played for the Browns, right?
Otto Graham.
But here's what's interesting about him.
He went to Northwestern.
He had a 300-batting average in college.
And that's when everyone played baseball because baseball was the only way to make real money, was King.
And he played basketball in college.
And I think he won what would be an NBA championship.
He was like the sixth man on a pro team.
So he won a championship in professional basketball, hit 300 in college.
And I think as a quarterback, did he win seven championships in 10 years, right?
Yeah.
Is that right?
Is that crazy?
Think about that.
And, you know, everyone wants to say the goat, the goat, but you can't really compare era to era.
You know, Jordan said it's hard to say who the greatest of all time was because it was different rules at different time.
And one person learns from the next person.
So Otto Graham dominated his era.
Obviously, Brady dominated his era, you know, and this guy.
So it's so hard to compare era to era who was the best.
I think sports always want to sell you now that you're watching the best ever because it sells tickets.
Who doesn't want to feel like they're watching the best product ever?
Right.
But it's a totally different game than it was back when you could hit a quarterback when LT played.
Oh, yeah.
So I'm not saying that it's not better that they've changed it.
I'm just saying it's hard to compare one quarterback from an era to another.
Well, they never had turf toe when we were growing up.
Remember, when did they come out with that?
You know what I'm saying, though?
Like, if you ever hear a guy has turf toe, you would hear a guy's toe was in pain, so he carved it off with his nail with his wife's nail clippers on the way to the stadium so he could still play.
That was Ronnie Lott right.
He took his finger off.
Yeah.
He ripped his finger off so he could play.
It's a different era.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Let me see that shit.
This is the thing I always marvel at.
Ronnie Lott ripped his finger off.
He's like, I'm going back in.
That's a dedication.
That's not a hobby.
But, you know, that's what I always think is crazy when you hear about boxers.
What's the longest boxing fight of all time?
It used to be 27 rounds.
I think someone fought 100 rounds.
Am I crazy?
Could you jump rope for 100 rounds for three minutes?
No way.
What's the longest fight?
I mean, it's probably the one in Gaza right now, but I'm just listening to that guy.
That's true.
Andy, Bowen, and Jack Burke, the longest boxing match in history was 110-round.
Because they used to fight until someone couldn't answer it.
But at the end, we were just whispering heavily at each other.
Like, how?
I think you're in the bathroom a lot.
I don't even think anyone saw it.
But so that's the thing that's crazy.
And they would fight like, look how many fights these guys had.
These guys would fight like 10 times a year.
Now they're fighting twice a year.
How many fights did Sugar A. Robinson have?
Did he have like 300 or something?
Isn't that crazy?
Yeah.
And now a guy will have maybe 30.
30?
Because they space it out.
But how do you compare these guys?
How many fights?
What was his record?
I can't see.
At the end, he was 174 in 19 and 6.
So just about 200.
What?
Isn't that crazy?
Oh, my God.
Sugar must have been Stevia by the end of that, dude.
He had the aspartame beat out of him.
You don't think he ever had, he probably had a turf toe.
He didn't even know that.
He probably had a turf head at a certain point, dude.
That's so crazy.
The difference was.
It's unbelievable.
Why do you think someone could be like that?
Well, this is the stuff that they're not, but this is it.
I remember when my dad grew up and he'd go to the farm where his dad was because his parents were divorced.
So in the summer, he'd go work the farm, but they didn't have any running water.
So he said when they would bath, they'd go down to the fucking creek and fill up the thing with water.
They'd boil it.
And then dad would bathe, then his older brother, then him.
But that wasn't that long ago.
So if you go back then, everything took physical strength.
Like just moving around.
No one was sitting around playing Mario Kart in between games.
Right.
Your thumbs weren't the strongest parts of your body.
So you were always like just doing anything took so much energy and strength.
And you're using your muscles every day.
So I think they train smarter.
They know more, but there's more downtime and less strain on your body doing daily tasks.
But back then, these guys were just getting from place A to place B was exhausting.
But I don't know how you could fight 110 rounds.
I don't know if you could do jumping jacks for 110 rounds.
It's so crazy.
How do they do that?
Remember, they used to have 15 round fights and then they went to 12 because they thought 15 was too much.
So I don't know how to compare.
How do you compare someone?
How do you compare someone from that era to this era?
It's just a different time.
It's impossible.
It's a different sport.
And also they say like the diet has gotten better and we have like if all these things have gotten better, you think that they would be able to do it more.
But then part of it probably has been that the commercialization of it has come in and like, well, let's only have it be here so we can have the viewership and have to sell the tickets then.
So that could be part of it.
Or understanding safety.
Back then, like you said, they wouldn't even know what turf toe was.
It was just you moved on.
Oh, every other person.
One person had a glass eye.
When I was a kid, every other person had a glass eye.
Like if some guy was going to, I remember at the fair or whatever when the fair would come, you'd have a guy that would sit there and have a hat full of people's glass eyes.
Like you'd set it and therefore you went on the ride.
They put their eyes out because they would just lose on the tilt to war?
Yeah, people that had one, they'd be like, they leave their eye in the bag.
They live in a little basket or whatever, like basket for eyes and lose change or whatever.
That's an exciting hometown.
I never saw that.
Get it when you come back out.
But you'd have four of them in there at a time.
You know what I'm saying?
Like people.
It'd be tough on a date.
There'd be some rides you couldn't go on.
Maybe we're not going on the tilt to war.
Yeah, honey.
Honey, let's go on the, what's that one that goes up real slow?
Ferriswear.
The Ferris wheel?
Yeah.
Isn't that the slow one where you kind of sit at the top?
Oh, yeah.
That's it.
You're not going on that salt and pepper ride where you're fucking going up and down.
I used to do that with friends.
We'd dare them.
We'd go have like hot dogs or hamburgers.
And then at the end, you dare someone, can anyone eat all this for 20 bucks?
And someone would be desperate for money.
So they'd be like, fuck, we'd all kick in.
They'd be like, I'm going to have a shake.
I'll eat those chili fries.
I'll finish that chicken breast sandwich.
And then you'd say, okay, another 20 bucks if you go on that salt and pepper ride.
And they'd fucking lose their shit.
But yeah, I mean, it's a different, it's so weird.
I also think the food might have been healthier.
Oh, I know.
Because remember, they went through that whole stuff with the oil seed oil, and we know it's bad for you.
But they went through a whole thing saying you should cook with that.
But back then, people just cooking with butter.
Yeah.
I think the food was healthy.
That was more natural.
It was less fucked up food in some ways.
Dude, strong saliva dip spit.
People would cook in it.
You know what I'm saying?
Did you start dipping young?
Yeah, because I used to work on a farm.
So we would chew the club, the like the block of tobacco liquor.
Like Red Man?
Yeah, like the would you do like skull winter grain, like the circular one?
No, no.
We plug tobacco.
We all we had a thing.
Yeah.
So we did the plug.
When I first started as a kid, we didn't know it was that bad for you because we knew smoking was bad, but you would think this wouldn't hurt your.
Then they started showing pictures in the school of people missing their jaws.
Oh, yeah.
But originally you thought it's not bad for your wind.
But it was all like the skull winner green, like the circle stuff.
Oh, yeah.
And then, but the red man was the leaf.
But the first time you do it, you're going to vomit.
Oh, yeah.
I puked out of my friend's mom's car.
Older kids are like, here, try this.
Yeah.
And they would watch you fucking vomit.
Were you in a car in these bombs?
Farm Days and Tobacco Habits 00:15:42
Yeah.
I sat out of each window.
I was like, oh, maybe I'm sick just at this window.
And I sat out of each window and puked out of each window.
There's no way to keep it in more than two or three minutes.
You're on the ground.
It was the worst.
It still makes me fucking sick.
It was cherry skull or something.
Do you remember the first alcohol you got really drunk on?
Yeah, dude.
Of course.
So I remember climbing up a shelf in my brother's closet.
I found a pornos.
They had pornos up there.
It was a surprise.
You weren't expecting that.
It was a lot of surprises.
This one shelf I'd never been to.
They had a little stack of sand.
You were a ground barrier and he was putting shit up high.
He was a mountain hider.
Oh, like, oh, this is where things are up here.
Yeah.
And I got up there and I remember this kind of like, and I found liquor up there.
Yeah, what was it?
Alize, it was called.
It was like a pretty more of an urban liqueur, I think.
Bringing up a bottle of it.
It was considered an urban liqueur right there.
The orange was so.
Have you ever had it since?
I've never had it since.
See, that's how it is.
My first drunk was peppermint snops, and I never touched it again.
I think the first time you get really drunk, you never revisit that.
Yeah.
Ever.
Ever.
But the first time.
How did you do it?
Were you playing quarters or were you just drinking by yourself?
Were you with friends?
No.
By yourself?
By myself.
Oh, climbed up there.
I remember drinking and then watching porno or whatever.
And then I had started off as a fun afternoon.
But here, 30 years later, it's still been an issue, you know?
Did you just go through like what?
Like a quarter of a bottle or a couple glasses?
I think I had four sips, jerked off, and then blacked out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You woke up with the evidence all around.
You didn't even clean up the crime scene.
Woke up, yeah, with my glass eye and a hat.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Friends were over here.
I'm pissed that they left the house.
Yeah, mom, can you believe some kid came over here, jerked off on my stomach and drank some of this and left, mom?
Times have changed.
With your new movie, if you could go, Mike, Nick, Nick, and Alice.
Yeah.
If you could go, because your character kind of goes back in time to make something different.
Right.
Is there a time if you could go back in time that you would go back to kind of like, I know it's a general question.
It's kind of whatever, but you know, it fits with the film, man.
Yeah.
And it makes you think, what would you go back to change?
Because I think it used to be people would be like, I'd go back and stop Hitler.
I'd go back and I'd go back and help Napoleon or do whatever.
I think you would.
Or I'd go back and like be in, you know, Jumanji one or whatever.
Right.
But then now it's like people I think would do individual things.
Like I'd go back and you know, buy a Bitcoin or something.
You know, it's more realistic.
Right.
It's a crazy thing to think you're going to go and be the one guy to fucking go to the king and tell him to shut the fuck up and no one else is.
You know what I mean?
Like people are always like that.
It makes me laugh, right?
I go do the, oh, would you have?
Yeah.
Maybe.
Dude, I'll go back and tell him.
Yeah.
Obviously, no one's walking up to the guy and saying, hey, Hitler, call him back.
I'll be the guy.
That's hilarious.
Have you thought about in your life what you would do?
Yeah, I think I would go back maybe to a certain time probably.
And I think I could have been better like in this one relationship I was in, probably.
That's a great thing that you feel that.
But I would say to you, I have had those thoughts, but then I realize you have to travel down every road you travel down and you don't get to learn those lessons without making those mistakes.
And so you're kind of in a good spot now.
You're very reflective.
You think about stuff.
And so maybe if you hadn't gone through those things, not that you want to get hurt or hurt anyone, but sometimes you got to go through those lessons.
And so like what we were talking about earlier, where I said you can ask for those things now, you got to take that knowledge and bring that to your new thing.
Yeah.
And maybe you think if you went back, but normally the person you were dating was sometimes had their own lessons to learn.
And that's why you found each other.
And you can romanticize, like, what if we were each different people, but you weren't.
And hopefully you're both better people from the experience.
So I think you can not go back to that, but you can take the lessons and have something great now.
And I don't know that you would have been in that relationship with that exact person if you were a different person at that time.
There was probably something with her going on too, that drew you guys together to teach each other that, whatever that experience was.
Make sense?
Yeah.
Yeah, no, it does make sense, man.
Yeah, I think there's just like probably an, it's almost like an ego part of it.
Once I think about it now from that, it's like, yeah, you just wish you could go back and love somebody differently.
I love that.
But you can love that person different now.
And it's okay, Theo, because you weren't, how would you have known that?
Yeah.
Unless you're going through it.
It's like kids, you know, sometimes you take something away from a kid and then you see him cry.
You know, if you're just playing with toys, you go, oh, that doesn't feel good.
But I don't know that you can learn that without seeing the response of somebody else.
Yeah.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
But I think that's right.
But that's the thing with nostalgia is you can get excited, I think, about doing those things the right way now.
So you're nostalgic because you look back at those.
You don't want to hurt anybody.
You wish you could have played it out differently, but it played out the way it was supposed to for where you and that person was at.
And also it's our ego.
We're not that powerful.
Right.
Like sometimes, I don't know if you've ever suffered from this, but I could really get caught up in trying to help friends.
And then I realized I use so much time and energy and I'm really not that powerful.
Like I can't want them to change.
And the same way that I probably had people try to help me and I wasn't ready to change.
So you really can't get someone to a place that you think is right for them.
You can say it once.
You can, you know, you can encourage them.
Right.
You can give them grace and be there for them.
But ultimately, you can't really make that kind of a big shift with them.
Yeah.
Have you found that?
Oh, yeah, for sure.
You think you can, or there's times where it's like, yeah, I didn't try this enough or something like that.
But yeah, yeah, I couldn't.
Because I think we're hurting.
And so when we find better ways of doing things, we want everyone to have that.
And I don't know if you felt this way, but I, but I don't know.
Yeah, I had to go through a lot of it on my own.
You know, like I had to learn those lessons and figure it out.
When like the cavalry showed up and saved me.
Not that I didn't have good people in my life.
No, but everyone does.
They have to go through those stages too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You have to see something that like surprises you enough or you have to sometimes you have to hit a level for you that's like, this has to be different, you know?
Right.
But yeah, you can't like you can offer suggestions.
You can kind of show somebody you can lead by example sometimes.
And I think you can reflect on times when you handle stuff in ways that you feel good about.
Yeah, I don't do enough of that sometimes.
But I bet you have a lot of it.
I probably have some good ones.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Some really good ones.
And as you get older, don't you think more and more?
Yeah.
And so that's, that's what's in front of you.
And so that's why I would say the nostalgias, I like that for myself too.
But I realize at some point I have to take those things and really try to do it with what's in front of me now.
And I think you can have that exact relationship instead of saying, wasting time on saying, well, I'm older now.
I should have started this younger.
You can say, I know these things now and I'm going to start it now.
And I'm going to get a great experience based on the things I know.
Because the other just takes you in a place where you're kind of not allowing it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, I think it's making sure that you're learning from the past, you know?
Yeah.
And then you feel excited for what's in front of you.
And you can't really go back and that's the thing with stuff.
It's like you got to look at it and learn from it.
You can't, but then at some point, you got to move forward.
Yeah.
You know, it's like anything.
It's like a set.
What did I do right?
What did I do wrong?
What should I have done?
But at some point, you're good to move on and go to the next set.
Because if you just dwell on that set, you can get stuck in it to the point where it's counterproductive.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you have a process for that of dealing with a good process now that you feel good about?
I think it's gotten better.
Yeah.
I think even having conversations like this are probably helpful to be honest about it.
You know, same for me, too.
Having things that are like reminders and be like, yeah.
And that's that it's, yeah.
And I think you can take the things that you've done well at that in your professional life and apply those same principles to our personal life.
Yeah.
Or try to.
But I don't know that I would go back to answer your question because, and I don't mean, if you would ask me 10 years ago, I would have said, oh, for sure.
Because I'm not saying there's not things I didn't handle really bad or things I regret.
Of course there is.
But I think I couldn't change those because I don't know that I would have come out as different or stronger or at least more thoughtful if I hadn't gone through those experiences.
You got to walk down every road, I think.
So I like the idea that I could go back, but maybe you fuck up some other shit.
Yeah, dude.
Yeah.
That's a good point.
Oh, I think I just maybe would push the lesson till later.
I still make some of the same mistakes.
It's not like, you know, you get better at it.
I find that the time in between the mistakes is long, but they never go away all the way.
And your reaction to them and giving yourself a little bit more grace, but yeah, and making sure you don't go down and making sure sometimes that you don't like maybe hurt other people as much, you know, you know, or just like you're more respectful.
You're very thoughtful.
I bet you don't do that very often.
You're more respectful of their feelings anyway.
Not like actually hurt somebody, but.
But I know what you mean.
Hurt doesn't mean physical necessarily.
It means that you made someone feel unloved or unwanted or underappreciated.
Like a bruised banana or whatever.
Yeah.
But, you know, there's also a thing with being funny and connecting.
It's a weird thing because I really enjoy teasing with friends sometimes.
And if someone showed any weakness, we'd kill you until it didn't bother you.
Anything that bothered you, that was going to be the topic of jokes until you got over it.
It wasn't our job to make you okay.
That's a good point.
You had a fucking, and I think some of that was good.
Oh, dude, it was the best, bro.
We would fucking, everybody would pick on you.
Everybody, but everybody got it.
You would all deal with it.
And now everything is, now it's more like bullying.
Dude, I saw two Waymos bullying a fucking Kia Sorrento on the way here.
And I was like, nobody's helping this guy or whatever, this female.
I don't know what to do.
It was comedy.
We were just brutal.
Oh, so many people.
And if we knew it bothered you, it would never stop.
So it was a weird concept to me where I thought you're not making fun of each other.
Yeah, we were just communicating.
Even animals call each other names, I bet, a lot.
Yeah.
You know, we just won't know it.
They're at least signaling that they're not into what they're doing.
Yeah.
But your character has to go back in time.
I do want to make sure that I talk about your movie a little bit more and then we'll get you out of here.
And thanks so much for your time today, man.
Oh, it's great to hang with you.
I enjoy listening to you and appreciate you.
So it's fun to get a chance to sit and talk with you.
Well, same man.
Thanks for all the entertainment and inspiration and like, yeah, just so much good humor over the years.
Thank you.
Back at you.
Yeah, because your character goes back in time, not really to help himself, though, kind of.
That's right.
Well, isn't it to help himself in a way?
Like, that's a good point.
He doesn't love the way that he's handled stuff.
Right.
And he realizes the pain he caused.
You don't think that's what it's for in the beginning, kind of.
That's fair.
You kind of get, yeah, like you get that as it goes along a little bit.
I don't want to give away too much of it because there's moments in it that were very like a surprise.
It's to me.
I was like, oh, there's some good twists.
Yeah.
But I think the concept's right.
And I think all of us hopefully are that way.
I don't know.
I think people are happier when you're thinking about others more.
And I don't say that in like a kind way, like I'm great.
I mean, just it's a general feeling.
You feel better when you are thoughtful of others in connection with them than when it's all about you.
We're scientists.
We never had friends like that.
We wouldn't hang out with somebody that would talk about themselves all fucking day.
Yeah.
Would you?
Well, they didn't even have it as much.
No, you wouldn't be at the fucking, you wouldn't be included.
Nobody wants to hear about it.
How you're great.
No one wants to hear how you're killing it all day.
It's so weird.
But you know what's I find now?
Like parents do it with their kids.
It's everywhere.
Me, me, me.
It's so crazy.
It's just in general, I think there's way more of a, it's odd because you're marrying the one hand that what we were talking about with this kind of uh better than now, but on the other hand, it's really kind of about ourselves more.
It's a weird cultural moment.
Yeah, well, it's like we just see so much reflection of ourselves, you know, and we don't have a lot of time to integrate.
That's one of the biggest things I know is it used to be like you go see a movie or you would read a book or you would read some pages of a book or things like that.
And then your brain and your heart and stuff would have time to integrate stuff.
But now it's like, we'll get on our phone or there's a night, there's a next thing, there's a next call.
There's so much connection that you're not really processing.
Are you good at downtime and processing?
I'm getting better at it.
That's great.
Because I want it more.
I start to realize, oh, there's so much peace in this thing.
You know, it's like, yeah, there's just, it's almost there's nowhere to hide from the electronica, it feels like sometimes these days.
For sure, I could be guilty.
You get stuff, a game or something that you like.
Yeah, but your phone, a game, a TV, another screen there, an advertisement, whatever.
You know, even just a little Chinese guy that's just telling you something, you know, it's like it never ends.
There's just like a lot of information coming at you.
Do you have a good group of pals and people that you connect with and hang out with a lot in Nashville or here?
Or is it more like everyone's in different locations and you kind of everybody hook up?
Yeah.
But I got to do a little bit better.
I think I need to branch out a little bit more.
I know good people.
So I think sometimes I actually.
I like my alone time.
Do you?
Yeah, but it can be isolating for me too.
Sometimes that's, I like to recharge.
I like that.
And then I do like to hang out.
Yeah.
But I'm not someone who wants to hang out four days a week.
Did you feel a responsibility?
Because you did those, you did that swingers when we all go to Las Vegas.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And did, so do you ever feel like a responsibility to people that were going to Vegas, like some guy that got like GHB'd by a hook or something?
It's like, I'm here because event.
You know what I'm saying?
Did you ever feel any like you ever lay in bed at night and be like, how many guys, like, how many dudes are laying without a kidney in an ice bath right now?
No, I always looked at like storytelling and comedy.
Like, you know, they're, they're, they're stories like campfire stories.
Same with comedy.
So they're not like how-to books.
But people.
Yeah, but it's crazy.
It's like, you know, I remember like when I would watch, you know, you know, fun movies, they were escapism.
But I never, we were never so fucking dumb that we were like, oh, they're telling me like I got to go out and risky business.
I got to go get some hookers and fucking get into Harvard.
You know what I mean?
Like they were, they were having fun with, they were having fun with what was going on at the culture.
Right.
So like in that movie, it was the mom and dad are like, you got to go to Harvard.
You can't fucking have a party.
And he's like, I'm a fucking horny teenager.
I'm looking to, I'm looking to fucking mix it up.
Like I'm living right now.
And so the idea of that was the thing that was a problem, saying what the fuck, and running hookers as a pimp for the suburban kids.
That's actually the thing that got them into Harvard, right?
It's a crazy movie, but we never were like, oh, yeah, these guys are my parents and they're telling me I better go fucking start a brothel out of my fucking basement going back to basements.
Like, no, it was escapism.
It's fun.
So like swingers is a, it's really about, you know, friends helping a friend get past a breakup.
Yeah.
And, but, you know, who wants to watch perfect people?
These are people that have some good, some bad.
And that's the journey of the story where you go through people and you get to learn from what they did right or what they did wrong.
If you go back to like even the Bible or Greek mythology, some of these morality tales, it's like someone does this and here's the consequences of it.
Harvard Escape and Swingers Club 00:07:05
They're not all stories like everyone's doing everything right.
Most of these human stories are someone made a decision based on ego or what was important in the moment and they paid the price.
Right.
Those are important stories.
Yeah.
Well, there were, yeah, like moral tales like Aesop's fables they had when I was a kid.
Like they had different things like that.
I wonder if they still had that stuff for kids because there was a lot of stuff that was like kind of common in culture that was where you would learn things from.
But yeah, if you watch Forrest Gump and you go out and break both your legs, so you can kind of run across the country.
Yeah, dude.
You know what I mean?
Then I guess you're like Forrest in some way.
I mean, I don't, yeah, you know, like, I never took that seriously.
It's like, where are the parents at?
Yeah.
You know, it's like same with albums.
When we were kids, they started putting these warning labels on an album.
Oh, yeah, parental advisor.
You remember that?
It was like Tipper O'Neill or something.
They were putting like these.
It's a parental advisor is a black and white.
But that would make us biased.
Yeah.
It's like, let me hear that fucking inhibitor on the filter.
Let me, right?
Parental guidance.
But like as kids, we weren't like, when I was listening to NWA, this wasn't like a fucking how-to manual.
Yeah.
I was digging someone having a strong opinion, unapologetic from their experience.
I was like, fuck, I want to, let me fucking listen to that.
That's fun.
But we were never so fucking dumb.
Do you know what I mean?
That's part of the problem that they make it.
And I was like, everyone's so fucking stupid that if you see, you know, any, like any kind of movie or story that it's somehow encouraging kids to do it.
It's like, shut the fuck up.
I'm going to listen to rock and roll and watch some people make some bad decisions and laugh.
You know what I mean?
Like, when did that become a thing where like, like, if you do a set out, you're funny.
I hear your shit.
You're not going to do it.
You have lawsuits.
That's what did it probably.
People suit for a thing, probably.
But yeah, if you got so attached, you're like, oh, I believe this.
Now I'm going to.
Like when you do your sets, and I enjoy them, sometimes you're going further with a point of view to get a point across.
You're not hoping you're reaching some fucking eight-year-old kid to go follow.
You know what I mean?
You're like.
Right.
Yeah.
That's all a bunch of people.
You're being entertaining and fun.
And I think there's a place for that.
I think, if anything, that's what, that's what got in the way was that everyone started to put these things under a microscope.
Like, I don't know.
Like when we were kids in school, if we go to the auditorium and they would give us like a safety film on fucking bicycles, we'd just make fun of that shit all day long.
I'm not telling kids to go out and, you know, but everyone's got to assume whatever risk you want to take.
Like everyone's different.
You got to, you got to decide, are you going to cross the highway because you want to get to that candy store and try to dodge the cars?
No one should do that.
But everyone ultimately is going to make their choices.
Yeah.
And there'll be people that do and people that don't, you know?
Right.
But yeah.
But how do we, I saw a bike video and I was like, first of all, I'm never wearing a bike helmet because I understand it's safe.
I know it is, but I don't want my children to see me in a bike helmet because my son and I would never be able to make eye contact ever.
I mean, now all the kids have to.
We didn't know what the fuck that was.
And in a way, I think it kept us in some ways.
This is, but I felt like I was safer because I could try to jump that.
Yeah.
But there ain't no fucking way I'm going to jump that.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Because the helmet.
Yeah.
Like we knew I may get some fucking scabs and shit and hit my face if I put like, you know, a wooden board on two things, but I'm not doing five because I don't have a fucking helmet.
You know what I mean?
Like it was self-regulatory.
If you got me all fucking Michelin man and dressed up, I might try to go back like evil and try to jump the fucking Snake River.
But I'm just saying, like entertainment and stories, you know, I think have fun with it and you should watch it.
But I mean, really?
What percentage of the population thinks that it's a how-to book?
Yeah, who's going to get it?
And by the way, do we cater everything to the fucking naive kid who's looking to jump on any story he sees?
Like that's the way to live his life.
It's kind of what we do.
That's kind of what we've done anyway.
Right.
And hopefully that's kind of correct in court.
You can't watch Judy Harry because you think you can just go fucking shoot a criminal without talking to him?
No, it's escape.
You're like, yeah, that motherfucker.
You know what I mean?
Like you like it as a story.
Yeah.
But that's what it was.
Yeah.
But I think everyone kind of got that more.
Like I wasn't listening to I wasn't listening to rock and hip hop and shit.
Right.
But I think it was lawyers that did it.
They're like, oh, this is, this is what happened.
We're the do-gooders.
Maybe they meant well.
Right.
But don't you create a whole other series of problems?
Because if you can't express those feelings through movies and songs, where do those feelings go?
Yeah.
Like if storytelling and stand-up or this isn't the place to expose podcast, if we can't express ideas there or feelings, what do you do with those?
They just, you can't have those feelings?
It's crazy.
Oh, I think one day a smile will be in a museum and you go to see it.
You know?
I really hope.
I hope not.
I don't think so.
I don't think I hope not.
Ultimately, I know you don't believe it.
I don't think I really.
You think there's a warning of it.
Right.
I think we're getting close.
We're going to push against it.
If you want to see feelings, you'll have to go to a museum.
Oh, this was happiness.
Look, children.
I think these kids sometimes, I think there's a place for, I think it's good.
I'm not saying it's all the pendulum always goes too far in one direction.
I think it's good to have skills to talk about stuff, but it's always a little bit like this.
Like, if you have a breakup with a girl that's bad and we're friends, I'm going to clear the decks.
Our other friends are going to do it.
And we want to hear everything you got to say about this breakup.
And we're going to give you our perspective and we're going to really focus on it.
And that may go on for a week.
But after three weeks, you're not allowed to talk about it anymore.
There's nothing else to say.
We got to drop it and move on.
You got to get in a new bad relationship.
You know what I mean?
Like, we can't keep talking about that.
And so I think what happens sometimes is we're indulging talking and exploring it.
There's a time to do it.
You need to do it.
But at some point, if you're always bringing up the stuff, you just kind of stay depressed.
Yeah.
Like there's a process to digesting it.
And then there's a process of pushing it away and trying to get into something new.
But if you're only focused on it, it just doesn't go away.
Well, you're kind of getting addicted to self-pity too at that point in a way, you know?
Or you're just always living in that and it's going to make you sad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And that's, I think that's something that's kind of like been like kind of a society.
It's just a weird tour that we took in society of like, you know, that there's something always wrong with us, you know?
Well, who isn't there something wrong with?
Hopefully everybody.
There's something wrong with it.
As you get older, you start to go, my God, everyone's a little nuts.
Yeah.
Like we're all holding it together.
But if you see people by themselves, like there's no one you would be like, that guy's like at home living.
You know what I mean?
Like everyone's got shit that's crazy.
Oh, hopefully.
Hopefully.
Dude, the best thing is imagining that people are at home just fucking, you know, putting lips.
Urban liqueur.
Yeah.
Urban liqueur and hopefully some French magazine.
Club.
Le Club.
I think it was called Le Club.
Your movie comes out on Hulu, March 27th.
And, oh, Jimmy Tatro's in it.
Winning Mentality on the Field 00:02:52
His character is hilarious, isn't it?
Yeah, he's a great guy.
He's good.
Yeah, he's funny.
He's a cool guy.
And they said Marsden, they're all good in it.
That's the lady in it.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
She's real foxy.
Yeah.
And then the other guy, James Morrison.
That plays Mike.
He was cool.
Yeah.
And he's a good actor.
He's a good actor.
Yeah, he did a good actor.
A lot of good facial stuff and like a lot of like, yeah, he's like good looking, but he also is entertaining.
He reminds me of Rob Lowe a little bit.
That's interesting.
I could see that.
Yeah.
Handsome guy.
Likable.
Right.
But also like not just being handsome.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Not just being handsome.
Yeah.
Vince Vaughan, thanks so much.
I think it's great to sit with you.
Nope.
Yep.
Yeah.
I'm excited for the Bears next season, man.
We'll be cheering them.
Cool.
Is that your, is that kind of my doctor?
It's a target team.
Yeah, I got you.
Just because we grew up so much, I grew up there watching like, you know, like the only baseball teams that existed were like Cubs and Braves.
Cubs, Braves, Cardinals, though, like collecting like Ozzy Smith cards.
Coleman.
Yeah.
Oh, Robin.
Vince Coleman.
Vince Coleman, Ozzy Smith.
They were dominant.
Cardinals were always tough.
Have you ever hung out with Mark Grace before?
I met him.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's a great guy.
He's the best.
He does the best stories.
Yeah.
He's a hell of a player.
Oh, he was so good.
But those were the times.
Andre Dawson, all those guys.
Hot Scott, Cliff, Greg Maddox.
That was like the, there was like only three or four teams that existed, it felt like.
Yeah.
They were popular.
They had personalized, but Cardinals have been good forever.
They're always finding them.
Lately, not as much, but they've always been dominant.
Cubs, as you know, was a long story.
So it was a big deal when we finally won.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, when you thought of all the.
Were you with the Titans at all?
I wish they would draft Diego Pavia for the same reason that we said that he played at Vanderbilt.
He crushed it there.
I think.
How fun was that kid to watch?
So much fun.
Dude, I love that dude's spirit.
I loved watching that boy play.
A kid from my high school played wide receiver for him.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Younger than me because he's playing now, obviously.
What's his name?
It's not like some 50-year-old had some eligibility on his fucking ears.
Well, they'd probably give him Hoskins.
His last name was Hoshkin.
Oh, Richie Hoskins?
I knew his sister real well.
Bro, Richie's a dog.
He was good, right?
Dude, he caught a couple.
He caught some passes that only he could catch, bro.
Yeah, there he is.
Yeah, they worked.
I knew his aunt would have been my great and was a nice cow.
But he played for him.
So I watched.
My high school puts out a lot of really good athletes, people that still to this day, Lake Forest High School, Public High School in Illinois.
And a lot of people do well.
But this was an exciting year for Vandy.
And that quarterback.
Diego Pavia, yeah.
Bro, he was like this.
I'm going to go to his.
He was like, oh, he's like that.
Come and get it.
Yeah, he was super fun to watch.
And they come.
He's going pro now.
Is he done?
Yep.
He's training right now down in Tampa.
Where did he transfer from?
He transferred from New Mexico State and then before that, New Mexico School of Mines.
I think he could have gotten one more year, actually.
He's going to strike by the irons out of camp.
He's already in.
He's already going in.
He's not tall.
Exciting Year for Vandy Football 00:01:34
Well, that's the thing.
They came out and said that and was like, so you're telling me he did this great at not even the same height as some of these other guys?
It's true.
Sometimes that motivates you to get better at it.
Well, Brady was that in a way, right?
He didn't hit the prototype and made him work harder.
I mean, being tall wasn't his thing, but they also made it like, but he obviously, sometimes the thing that they label you as a disadvantage makes you stronger because you have to work harder.
Yeah.
But that dude's a winner, bro.
He doesn't.
That's the thing.
Who do you want to bet?
You want to bet on somebody that wins every time they say you can't academic school in the SEC at Vanderbilt.
I mean, you're playing big-time football every week.
When's the last time Vanderbilt was in that position?
Never.
And so the fact that this kid was a part of that with a lot of other great players and did that well, that's that intangible quality that has to mean something.
And that's the shit.
That's the shit's getting lost in this evaluation.
Yes.
Always.
In everything.
It's stupid.
Yeah, it is.
There's a place for it.
Yeah.
But not the whole thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But anyway, I'm glad we all got that out of our systems.
Me too.
Dude, thanks.
Yeah, I appreciate you too, Vince.
Thanks so much, man.
And we'll check it out.
Everybody, it's on Hulu, March 27th.
Now I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.
I must be cornerstone.
Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this piece of mind I found.
I can feel it in my bones.
But it's gonna take a
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