Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool

Sept. 4, 2024 - This Past Weekend - Theo Von

02:06:42

E529 Post Malone

Post Malone is a singer, songwriter and producer originally from Syracuse, NY. His new album “F-1 Trillion” is streaming now everywhere, featuring Morgan Wallen, Jelly Roll, Brad Paisley, and many more. Post Malone joins Theo in Nashville the day after his Grand Ole Opry debut to chat about making his new country album, bringing a katana to the birth of his daughter, and his advice to young artists making music. Post Malone: https://www.instagram.com/postmalone/ ------------------------------------------------ Tour Dates! https://theovon.com/tour New Merch: https://www.theovonstore.com ------------------------------------------------- Sponsored by: Prize Picks: First time users, download the PrizePicks app, use code THEO and PrizePicks will instantly give you $50 on your first lineup of $5 or more. https://www.prizepicks.com/ Boot Barn: Visit http://BootBarn.com and use code THEO to get 15% off one item now through September 30th. Manscaped: Go to http://manscaped.com and use code THEO to get 20% off and free shipping. Rocket Money: Go to http://rocketmoney.com/theo to cancel your unwanted subscriptions with Rocket Money. BetterHelp: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp — go to http://betterhelp.com/theo to get 10% off your first month. 50 Fires: Go to link.pscrb.fm/theovon-2307812 to listen to the 50 Fires Podcast. ------------------------------------------------- Music: “Shine” by Bishop Gunn https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3A_coTcUek ------------------------------------------------ Submit your funny videos, TikToks, questions and topics you'd like to hear on the podcast to: tpwproducer@gmail.com Hit the Hotline: 985-664-9503 Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: https://www.theovon.com/fan-upload Send mail to: This Past Weekend 1906 Glen Echo Rd PO Box #159359 Nashville, TN 37215 ------------------------------------------------ Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheoVonClips Shorts Channel: https://bit.ly/3ClUj8z ------------------------------------------------ Producer: Zach https://www.instagram.com/zachdpowers Producer: Nick https://www.instagram.com/realnickdavis/ Producer: Colin https://instagram.com/colin_reiner Producer: Ben https://www.instagram.com/benbeckermusic/ Producer: Cam https://www.instagram.com/cam__george/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	We have some new, new tour dates to announce.
	Bloomington, Indiana on November 13th at the Indiana University Auditorium.
	Columbus, Ohio, November 14th at the Schottenstein Center.
	Champaign, Illinois up there November 15th at the State Farm Center.
	And Grand Rapids, Michigan on November 16th at the Van Andell Arena.
	Get your tickets early starting Thursday, September 5th at 10 a.m.
	local time with pre-sale code Rat King.
	General on sale starts Friday, September 6th at 10 a.m.
	local time.
	We also have shows in Bend, Oregon, Spokane, Portland, Oregon, Vancouver in the Canada, Oklahoma City, North Little Rock, Springfield, and Kansas City, Missouri, Sioux Falls, South Dakota, La Crosse, Green Bay, Moline, Colorado Springs, Casper, Billings, Missoula, Lafayette, and Beaumont, Texas.
	Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R.
	Make sure to buy through that link so you aren't visiting a secondary site.
	And thank you so much for all of your love and support.
	Looking forward to seeing you there.
	We've got new merch.
	Check out the new Return of the Rat tie-dye teas in green and purple.
	We also have the Be Good to Yourself collection, Gang Gang hoodies, and much more, baby.
	I'm upstairs at TheoVonStore.com.
	Today's guest is a musician, artist, producer, actor.
	He's done it all.
	He has a new album coming out called F1 Trillion.
	Actually, it's out now.
	You can go enjoy it.
	It's him and some of my favorite artists.
	I saw him perform at the Grand Ole Opry last night, and it was magnificent.
	I'm so thankful for the energy that he's given to the world to bring us together, really.
	Today's guest is Mr. Post Malone.
	Shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my stories Shine on me And I will find a song I've been singing just before And I'll be moving well
	A little wine, a little wine is good.
	It's good for the heart.
	Doctors say pregnant ladies can drink it.
	Can they really?
	That's what they say.
	Yeah, but have you seen the babies?
	They're pretty fucking awesome whenever they come out.
	I'm going to say this, dude.
	They shred hard.
	They're like, I've been fucking drinking before I was born.
	Yeah.
	A lot of them have real pale skin and they're gingers, which are good citizens of the society.
	And they wear North Carolina jerseys.
	So they fucking go hard, bro.
	Depends on what wine it is.
	If you drink like a nice Bordeaux as opposed to like Franzia, which I love fucking Franzia.
	A little bag of wine.
	Yeah.
	Put in the saddlebag, put in.
	Well, Franzia was always like that wine that every now and then your parents would have a party or something.
	And then you would like go into the kitchen late to get a little snack or a little like square of cheese that someone or cracker somebody had left.
	And you'd go in there and some lady would come just stumbling out of the Christmas tree and she'd be like, hey, hey, hey.
	And gave it to you.
	No, she'd want, she'd have friends.
	She'd have it like tucked under her arm.
	At that point, sometimes they'd have it out of the box or naked as they were.
	Well, you have to have it out of the box, I believe.
	Oh, you do?
	It's like a water skin.
	It makes me feel like a frontiersman.
	Whenever they have those, like, fucking, what shape are those?
	Like a kidney shaped deal.
	You know what I mean?
	Water kidney.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, it is.
	It has a very, at that point, it gets a, like a camelback vibe.
	It's like a fucking bagpipe.
	Yeah, it gets a.
	I'm not surprised if some of those bagpipe players aren't just, well, you can actually hear a bagpipe.
	It's not surprising.
	The blowout and the frenzy is on the way in.
	You think you might bring two bagpipes.
	One is frenzia.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, you could get, put it in a camel bag.
	It's genius.
	It makes so much sense.
	Yeah.
	I had a bag of wine in my bed under my pillow all of for all of school.
	I don't know if I should say this.
	What school was it at?
	It was a school.
	That's a school, and my parents never found it.
	No way.
	Yeah, because it's kind of like a, I told them I bought like a water bed pillow.
	And you could just lean over and do it.
	It's like sucking on Romulus or Mother Rome's teeth.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, like sucking on Mother Rome's teeth, man.
	Nothing like it.
	There's nothing like it.
	Ask them.
	There's nothing like you do good?
	Is everybody in there okay?
	Yeah.
	Okay, cool.
	Thank you so much.
	You got like a big lightsaber?
	That thing that like, it's like you hit it and like somebody's whoop bracelet goes off in the distance or whatever.
	You know what I'm talking about?
	It's like that vapor, you hit it and somebody's whoop is like, I'm fat or whatever.
	It's a whoop bracelet.
	A whoop bracelet is like, bring it up.
	A whoop bracelet, it's like a bracelet that tells you you're sleeping well.
	It like monitors your heartbeat and then there's like a little plug or something.
	Maybe I think allegedly you can put into your side or something that'll monitor your sugar and it'll send the information to it.
	So it can tell if you're dreaming or if you like, if you've, if you're, you know, you've never met your father.
	It can tell you everything, dude.
	Don't they have them on Apple Watches?
	I think they have the Find Your Dad app on the Apple Watch.
	Oh, yeah.
	Well, yeah, then they just, somebody didn't trademark it then because a lot of people are doing it.
	Because sometimes it'll say on the whoop bracelet, it'll say, whoop, there he is.
	It'll play that song, you know?
	For your dad.
	Yeah.
	Like if you get close enough to him.
	Yeah, exactly.
	It gets louder as when the closer he is.
	There he is.
	And that's showing my age.
	post.
	Good to see you.
	Thanks for having me.
	Yeah, man.
	Congratulations, dude.
	I saw you at the Grand Old Opry last night.
	Thank you, sir.
	Thank you for coming.
	Thank you.
	Was that your first time there?
	Yes, sir.
	That was my first time.
	And I remember I laid down after I got home last night and I was like, was Theo Vaughn there?
	Because I'm 85% sure I said hi, but I didn't know if I was just dreaming.
	But lo and behold, you were there.
	Yeah, and you said, hey, man.
	It was nice.
	Well, I imagine it was such a tough place to be.
	I mean, there were so many stars in the building.
	And that was your first time performing there.
	Yes, sir.
	Terrifying.
	Terrifying.
	Yeah, because it's like going to like the Mount Everest of performances of live venues.
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	It's terrifying.
	Yeah, and you brought out John Michael Montgomery, Lainey Wilson.
	Brad Paisley came out and played three or four songs with you.
	You brought out Warren Treaty.
	Yep, you brought out Warren Treaty.
	And who else?
	Those dudes are handsome.
	Oh, Vince Gill?
	Vince Gill.
	So cool.
	It's so cool, man.
	I'm just like, I'm absolutely floored.
	I can't even begin.
	The crowd was so amped.
	Man, you know, I never know what to expect, but it was...
	What?
	Which is awesome.
	That's insane.
	Oh, somebody.
	Someone is so disappointed.
	Well, no, they got to see Laney and Van Dyck.
	And somebody else is buying their wife a set of Supreme tickets or hip replacements.
	You could have got two.
	Yeah.
	Two tickets.
	44 grand.
	Think of the boobs.
	Could have got.
	Pull that up.
	What kind of breasts can you get at 44 grand?
	And I have a blocker on this computer because I used to have a pornography issue.
	So I don't know if we can pull that up.
	See what they allow.
	How much breast can you get for 44K?
	44K just like that.
	Yeah, exactly.
	There's going to be some traps.
	44 large.
	I'm 44K.
	Oh, chest.
	44 large, bro.
	That was good.
	That was really good.
	Okay.
	What's 44K size breast?
	Yeah, let's see that.
	Tell me to look away if it gets too crazy.
	This is science.
	I'm 5'6 and 245 pounds.
	I've always had a severe back and neck problems because of them in quotations.
	And they're talking about them kids, buddy.
	Okay.
	Ever since, and look, I don't want to use pronouns, but we're talking about us, them.
	Shorts.
	Yeah, exactly.
	That's mine.
	Yeah.
	Ever since I was in high school.
	Those are K's.
	Oh, wow.
	Those are double K. What's the biggest size?
	Ever since I was in high school, I've been medicated.
	I don't think you need to be.
	Okay.
	That's an excuse to use drugs.
	That's my, my A-cups are driving me nuts.
	I need something.
	Whoa.
	Oh.
	My God, bro.
	That ain't the San Andreas fault, dog.
	That is amazing.
	Wow.
	What if someone fell in there?
	Oh, the best, the funnest thing to do there would be order one of those.
	Like, you know, you go to a restaurant and they put the little shots of different tequilas.
	Sure.
	And you just put them right in.
	You do a whole flight.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	You do a whole fight, which you guys can't see at all.
	Wow.
	These are.
	She's killing it.
	Oh, she's killing some.
	And they're natural.
	You can tell.
	Oh, those are, yeah.
	You couldn't do that.
	I mean, one of them looked like it washed up on the edge of the ocean.
	I like this asymmetric look.
	I think that's the dress.
	No, I think, obviously, all women are beautiful, but this is a lot of breasts.
	What we're saying here, what we're saying here.
	What we're seeing here is a lot of breasts.
	This is amazing.
	Now, this is something else.
	Now, that is a lot of breasts for someone.
	How would you, you couldn't even see your kid if you're feeding him?
	You're like, is he done?
	Good hugs.
	Best hugs.
	That's a wholesome response.
	Yeah, she gives great hugs.
	I can't believe I've never Googled this before.
	Yeah, I didn't know that either.
	That's 44K, double K. 44K, that's the breast size you get.
	So I think we put in 44,000.
	Wait, you get that for 44K?
	No, that's L, M, and N. She's in the N's.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	So I think we put in 44K as the money, and it took the computer took it as a breast size, 44K.
	Sure.
	I didn't know they went to K's.
	Me neither.
	And this, she's in the ends.
	Yeah.
	L M and N. Yeah, that's, I mean, she's got more K's than Joe Musgrove during a good game, brother.
	She's a lot.
	Anyway, nice to see you.
	It's been five minutes, yeah.
	We went from the Aubrey to boobs.
	But it is nice to look at something, and also it's not pornography.
	No, it's science.
	It's strictly science.
	It's just like my feet pick stuff.
	Like, just science.
	Have you ever had an you didn't even have an account on there?
	What?
	On Feet Find or one of those?
	No, but I was highly rated.
	Oh, really?
	I was like, I came in at like a 4-8.
	People put you on there.
	Yeah.
	4-8.
	Wow.
	You have good feet?
	That's what I hear.
	Yeah, boy.
	Well, I don't know about this one.
	WikiFeet Men.
	What does it say on WikiFeet Men?
	Yeah, let's go to actually.
	It's the top one.
	And I'm not going to say that I know this, but let's go to WikiFeet Men.
	Yeah, I mean, that's the only trusted source.
	Yeah, go ahead.
	Type me up.
	Yeah, that guy was at manfoot.org.
	Look at my rating.
	Let me see it.
	I got a 4-9.
	I'm like 4-9 right now.
	Is that what that says?
	Dude, I'm coming at it.
	Are there any pics of the actual hoofs, though?
	Yeah, they're in these.
	Okay.
	Check these out.
	Look at all the data.
	Find his data.
	Okay.
	Ooh, where's a hoof?
	Oh, so you really are a barefoot little soldier.
	I love it.
	It's the best.
	People call it earthing.
	I just call it.
	Postman gives you his dirty sock and draws you a tattoo.
	Oh, yeah.
	P-O-V.
	And then you got Lok in the background.
	Now he's making sure this is Kosh.
	Yeah, this is kosher.
	Your bodyguards in the background.
	Why am I smelling it?
	Hey, Lok, dude.
	What goes on at these shows?
	That's the kind of behavior that you got to offer off to people.
	Absolutely.
	When you do your live shows, do you have a big ensemble?
	Like, what goes on?
	What goes into your live shows?
	Because everybody kind of has different stuff, you know?
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	You know, now we started doing like a band a couple years ago, as opposed to just me.
	But now we have, now we brought Cheese out, Play Steel.
	Oh, Chandler from Ernest's band.
	Yeah.
	Ern is so sweet.
	And so is Cheese.
	But Ern, you know, he's played with Ern forever.
	He was just like, go, go, you know, and it was the other day.
	They were so excited.
	Sweet thing.
	Both of them were so excited that he was going to play with you.
	I was just like blown away.
	Like, because Cheese is, he's 21 years old.
	You know what I mean?
	And he's beautiful too.
	He's a stud.
	Absolutely.
	I mean, and also, if all the men died or something, he would immediately become number one.
	Look at that one right there.
	He'd be referred to as a woman.
	Look at that smile.
	Oh, God.
	I mean, it's like, God, if I didn't love these women so much.
	What a handsome woman.
	I would just run over there and meet that guy.
	But I love women.
	But yeah, no, that's amazing, dude.
	Chandler Walters.
	Chandler Walters.
	Yeah.
	Cheese.
	Old Cheese.
	He's into going out with you.
	And he's got a great energy, man.
	He's just the sweetest guy.
	And he's a songwriter, too.
	I think he just had his first number one recently.
	That's cheese, yeah.
	Yes, he did.
	With a me.
	With a me.
	Why'd I do Mario?
	Oh, it was with you?
	Yeah.
	And Morgan.
	Oh, with, I had some help.
	Yeah.
	No, I didn't even know that.
	Yeah, because at breakfast the other day, he said, or Ernest said, yeah, he just got his first number one.
	And I was like, and I don't know if we went into what it was.
	Dude, that's awesome.
	Well, yeah, because he wrote and played some steel on it.
	And he's just a killer.
	He's like the best dude ever.
	And I couldn't wish better things on him.
	He's just an absolute stud.
	And did you lose a member?
	How does it even work that you bring another member in?
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	So we had a band and they were more rocking.
	You know what I mean?
	We had an awesome string section.
	We had awesome members all around.
	But we had said that, you know, we want like, you know, fiddle playing and like guys on the B3 and all that stuff.
	And that was, it was tough.
	And, you know, it's awesome.
	Now, like, we're still going to jam with that band whenever we do.
	Like, I want to do a whole nother Nirvana deal, like do another Nirvana live stream and shit and do a bunch of cool shit.
	You mean like play Nirvana?
	Yeah.
	Like the one we did in COVID where we did all the Nirvana covers.
	It was so much fun.
	I didn't see it.
	So I want to bring, it's, people said it was good.
	I can't speak.
	I think, you know, you watch shit back and you're like, oh, I could have done way better.
	But people said it was good.
	You know, Dave said it was great.
	Courtney and Chris.
	It was awesome.
	It was a lot of fun.
	If you're drunk or if you're just hanging out one of these nights, anyone out there, you know, give it a watch if you haven't seen it.
	Wow, that's incredible.
	Yeah, so I guess if you're with, if you want to get more country-tuned artists.
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	The Steel, you know, Steel.
	And like, there's a different way.
	Mandolin?
	Do you have any of that in it?
	So Lily, she plays the fiddle.
	She kind of does like these plucky things, which is kind of Mandolin-esque, but no Mando.
	I love the Mando.
	Like coming here and doing like band days where all the session guys come in and just kill it.
	We got Craig playing the bass.
	He played bass on the whole album.
	He came out on tour.
	He's coming out on tour.
	Nice.
	So that'll be awesome.
	That's so great, bro.
	Yeah, last night was amazing, man.
	I almost felt bad you had to almost because there's so many stars in the building and you have to kind of oh Craig Young yes sir.
	Oh, it's beautiful bass player of the year bass player of the year bass player of the year.
	He was nominated for an ACM last year for bass player of the year.
	That's amazing.
	Killer.
	There's so many great musicians here in Nashville.
	You don't even realize it.
	You know, you're walking down the street and you're just like somebody's incredible.
	Damn.
	Anywhere you go, there is so much talent here in every crack and crevice.
	And it's insane.
	I can't like walking down the street.
	Oh, dude, and you'll fall, you'll hurt, you'll fall over, you'll sprain your ankle or something.
	And somebody will pull out a violin and write a song about you dying right there.
	And you're like, it's never happened to me.
	Oh, but I'm just saying it's so musical here.
	Anything happens, you kiss your girlfriend on the cheek, some guy pops up, and he's like, that's a song.
	That's the deal.
	It's like you fucking, you just go to losers.
	Yeah.
	And someone will say, that's why I want to hire, not a writer.
	I think this is a way we could really just get an old guy.
	Hire an old guy.
	You don't got to pay him as a songwriter.
	He just knows all the one-liners.
	Like he records what's going on?
	Everything he says.
	No, you just ask him a question.
	He'll say something.
	And you're like, oh, that's a song.
	Oh, I see.
	You know what I mean?
	Someone wise, like a Gandalf figure.
	Yeah, like that wouldn't sit piss.
	Like, old guys always say something.
	That's a song, dude.
	That wouldn't sit piss.
	Is that a thing?
	I've heard, I mean, old people always say something, you know, like that dog wouldn't sit piss.
	You're like, what is that?
	What?
	What?
	Yeah.
	But that's a song.
	That's where we just go get a little hammered at losers and just talk.
	And that's how songs come about.
	You know, someone will say something so dumb, but the melody was sick.
	And you're like, let's run with that.
	Like, just change that word, change from sit, piss to shit, piss.
	And then all of a sudden it's a hit.
	You know what I mean?
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah, dude.
	I know how hits work, brother.
	That's amazing, man.
	Yeah, and Lainey Wilson.
	Yeah, I think that was the strange thing.
	It was like all these artists got up there and it was so fast.
	It was like John Michael Montgomery, Lainey Wilson, Brad Paisley, Vince Gill.
	And then you played, I had some help by myself.
	And then, oh, your last song, you played Sunflower by yourself too.
	Yeah.
	But yeah, dude, it was great.
	There was all types of people in the audience.
	It was special.
	It was so, like, it's electrifying.
	It's so crazy standing in that circle.
	Like, it's just, I'm so honored.
	I'm blown away.
	I can't even believe it that they let me in.
	I can't believe they let me in the building.
	Yeah.
	You know what I mean?
	Oh, definitely, dude.
	I mean, yeah, because you got a unique look, you know?
	I mean, you look like a Christmas ornament that Jelly Roll would have.
	Did I tell you?
	I didn't tell you.
	And that's why I say none of us love it.
	Absolutely.
	I love it.
	I love it.
	I was driving to the stadium and some dude was like, Jelly Roll.
	I had the window open.
	I was like, what?
	Have you met Jelly?
	Oh, yeah.
	He's the best in the fucking world.
	Oh, he's the sweetest.
	He's the best.
	And he has so many feelings in him, dude.
	My favorite is when Jelly Roll wins an award.
	He gets up there and he's like, I want to say to everybody right now, there's somebody out there who's got no arms and no legs living under a bridge.
	And I want to tell you in two short months, you can be winning a CMIO.
	And then fucking, and everybody's just balling.
	He'd be a great WWE.
	Oh, he would?
	Oh, he just did WWE.
	No, he did not.
	Yes, he did.
	Pull it up.
	Oh, my God.
	The jelly roll on him, brother.
	He put the double E-clair on somebody.
	That was his finishing move, I think.
	The double E-clair?
	Or I think it was like the dirty clair.
	He put something on somebody.
	He put the fucking crispy bear claw on somebody, I think.
	Yeah, find out.
	He's got Randy Orton.
	Just pull up a video if you can of Jelly Roll in the WWE.
	Oh, my God.
	Wrestling.
	Defeat Dirty Dom in the Judgment Day.
	Oh, he'll put him in the dirty aquarium.
	Randy Orton, as a kid, I never got, but now I'm older and I'm like, he's so cool, man.
	Oh, he's just ADHD as if it made a living.
	There's Jelly right there.
	What?
	Yeah.
	Look at the crowd going crazy, boy.
	Damn, good.
	That's a good push.
	Jelly put it on him, boy.
	He'll put him in that crispy wheelchair.
	Jelly pull.
	Oof.
	He's got a nice mullet, too, that guy.
	Uh-oh.
	Jelly rolling Orton.
	All right, moving forward.
	I like that.
	Because it gets good.
	Does he get in the ring?
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's the Narcan yam, I think.
	Jellyroll fucking.
	Oh, I thought he hit the guy.
	There was no part where you hit him?
	Go to the movement.
	Oh, that's Jelly and MGK right there.
	Look at that.
	He's got the steel chair.
	No, shit.
	There he is.
	It's a lot of standing around waiting.
	Look at this.
	Oh, there's a Miz, too.
	No.
	Oh!
	Oh, Jelly hit him with the never-floss.
	Freaking.
	That's a fantasy of my dirty chair.
	Really?
	Jelly Roll.
	That's a fancy to be hit by a chair by Jelly Roll?
	Yes, sir.
	Look at this.
	This is where he puts him right here.
	No way.
	He put him in the fucking crispy.
	Yo!
	He put him in that glucose blender, homie.
	He fucking crisped that baby.
	You got a lot of finisher names.
	Oh, no, I'm just saying.
	What's your finisher called?
	He put him in that fucking carb walrus, baby.
	Jelly on play, dude.
	Where's Jelly from, dude?
	Ben?
	Oh, shit.
	Yo, that's fire.
	Antioch, baby.
	Yep.
	He hit him with that fucking Antioch injection right there.
	That Antioch insulator.
	That annihilator.
	That's fire.
	That's awesome.
	What's your finisher?
	My finisher probably be the, I would hold somebody down and cry directly into their eyes, to be honest.
	That's pretty good.
	It would be very primordial.
	I think it would be very like maybe there would be ancient poets that would enjoy it.
	Everybody else would be like, dude, what's going on?
	Or I just crying about till they drown.
	That would be cool.
	That's fire.
	That's hard.
	That's hard.
	What about you, man?
	What do you think?
	I don't know.
	Well, yours is fucking awesome.
	I don't know if it was awesome, bro.
	Well, I've always had a concept for a wrestler that doesn't touch anybody.
	He's just telepathic.
	So I think my move would be like grab somebody by the neck from across the ridge, then slam them back.
	And then a string pulls them off.
	Exactly.
	Exactly.
	See, but there's no wrestler that does that, I don't think.
	Gotcha.
	Exactly.
	Will they put me in the game?
	In the WWE game?
	Yes, sir.
	No way.
	Do you have a code?
	I think I'm like five bucks.
	I don't know how much I am.
	I'm worth about five bucks.
	No, dude, I heard that stud, dude.
	Burton Ernie's $11, dude.
	So that seems a little.
	Burton Ernie?
	Shania Twain is $7.
	Wait, where are you getting?
	I'm just saying.
	Shania Twain would be a killer.
	That's true.
	Yeah.
	Stomp, stomp, if she gets to use that as her finishing move.
	Oh, that's you right there.
	Can we see it again?
	Yeah, dude.
	They put me up in the deal.
	Look at that.
	Look at him.
	He's handsome.
	Oh, he's very handsome, dude.
	Yeah, it was fun.
	They made me buff.
	My overall is 69. That's your overall?
	Yes, sir.
	All my stats are maxed out, but my overall still says 69. Fair, fair, fair.
	Yeah.
	It's pretty cool.
	I love that.
	Were you a ladies' man when you were young or not?
	Absolutely not.
	Really?
	No, absolutely not.
	Do you remember like the first time you felt like a girl was like interested in you?
	No.
	Yeah, I already had like a million bucks by that.
	Oh, you did?
	And I was like, oh, no shit.
	This is how this works.
	Did you really feel that?
	Nah, yeah, man.
	I remember like, I got stood up at homecoming.
	Like, all my crushes, like, you know, it never, it never worked out for me.
	Really?
	But I think that worked out for me in the long run.
	Right.
	You know, because you could be a kid trying to get some cooch, but I was in my room playing the gatuch.
	You're like, I'll show you.
	I'll get you one of these days.
	I'll show you.
	And then the money came and it was awesome.
	Yeah.
	You know, that is funny.
	Some of this works.
	It is kind of funny.
	Some of that is how it works.
	It's like, if you don't feel some ambiance from women, or if you don't feel like seen maybe in the world or something, then you're like, well, I have to make myself be seen more.
	Sure.
	And so you create more.
	And that comes, I guess, like, it's kind of a weird way of like, oh, I want to express myself more so I become more introverted learning how to do that.
	You know what I mean?
	So tell me a little bit more about this.
	I'm hearing you, but tell me more about it.
	So like I wanted to make music.
	Right.
	But the only way to make music is like to do it.
	And so I just sat in my room with Audacity and played the guitar and wrote songs.
	And it's like, I want people to hear my music, but the way I do that is learn as much as I can by myself in my room.
	Exactly.
	You know what I mean?
	It's an interesting thing.
	Like taking the time to learn a skill or become an outlier, I guess.
	Well, I probably got 10,000 hours behind it.
	You know, it's an interesting thing.
	Yeah, I think that's something that part of people don't maybe, I don't know if they don't realize it, but yeah, there's a lot that goes into being good at something.
	Yes, sir.
	Or you could just be naturally talented.
	Right.
	Which fuck those dudes.
	Yeah.
	You know.
	Oh, dude.
	If I saw six of those dudes, dude, I'd fucking beat their six.
	Beat them all?
	I'd beat all six of them.
	That's what I would.
	What if they're naturally talented at fighting?
	Oh, God.
	That's going to be a lot of fun.
	Even worse.
	Even worse.
	Yeah.
	I call the cops, dude, and the cops would never come.
	But still, I would have called them.
	You know what I'm saying?
	But I'll never say, hey, I'm going to call the cops because that would end up on TikTok.
	Theova calls cops on six naturally gifted fighters.
	So I would just be like, hey, hold on, let me check in with a friend of mine.
	I think they're not feeling well today.
	So I would like to pretend Loki.
	I'd be like, help, cops, cops, cops.
	I'm ready to go.
	You can text 911.
	Can you?
	100%.
	Can you send him fee pics?
	I'm not going back to this.
	I hate doing it.
	I hate going back to it.
	But it's just where it got.
	This is where my mind goes.
	Oh, dude, you can text him.
	Dude, you can text 911.
	I was at the Dustin Poirier Max Holloway fight, and I remember texting 911.
	I'd never done it before.
	I was like, it's going to get beat up.
	Oh, I said, dear God, two men are beating the shit out of each other in Atlanta.
	That's a waste of resources, Theova.
	And they wrote back, I'm not even joking.
	What's good?
	No, they did not.
	I swear to, no, they did not.
	It said, what's good?
	ATL Police, yeah.
	No, they did not.
	Yeah, and it also, and they had a music, they put a musical gif with it, and it was Andre 3000 singing something.
	Sorry, Miss Jackson, I think.
	I'm like, dear God, dude.
	That's not true.
	That's a lie.
	The text isn't.
	They did not say what's good.
	They did.
	Okay, that mark.
	It was good slime.
	Okay, so they didn't say, I don't remember what they said, but they did accept the text.
	But yeah, you can text 911.
	All right.
	I know what I'm doing tonight.
	It's important to know, man.
	I didn't know that.
	You just text 911?
	Yeah.
	That's it.
	Yeah, you could text them like, hey, I need some help or something.
	And then I guess they probably hopefully would have the location.
	I don't know if that helps or not.
	Well, I guess it makes sense, right?
	Because if you're like in a situation where it's almost like a blink twice, if you need help type deal, you'd be like, oh, I'm going to.
	Because you remember there was a story about a lady saying like she was getting abused in her home and she was like, he was like, order a pizza or whatever.
	And she like texted 911 or called like, or called it and was like, disguised the call for distress as like ordering a pizza or something.
	Like, I need, hey, I need a medium pepperoni.
	I need four strong pepperonis.
	Yeah.
	I've made that call before.
	Put a gun and a bayonet on each one, please.
	Of the pepperoni.
	If those pies have gone through boot camp, that would be great.
	Pies carry Glocks.
	I'd like to know.
	This is Glock and Spiel's pizza.
	Is this true?
	Did I make this up or no?
	Yeah, see?
	That's the story.
	Let's see it.
	Let's see it, Benny Boy.
	First glance quickly turned out to be a call for help.
	Luckily for an Ohio woman, her 911 dispatcher was listening very carefully.
	Michaela Marshall has the story.
	I would like to order a pizza.
	You called 911 to order a pizza?
	Yeah, apartment.
	This is the wrong number to call for a pizza.
	No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
	In his 14 years of service, this is a stud.
	What a stud for picking it up.
	I'm surprised he stayed on that long, right?
	I'd like to order a pizza.
	Well, you know, probably get banged on, right?
	You know, he's a stud.
	Yep.
	I need a large pizza.
	Two large pizzas.
	Medical?
	No.
	Blood pepperoni.
	It's so good.
	It's like fucking so slick.
	Yeah, that's killer.
	But it makes sense to text 911.
	It does make sense now that I think about it.
	And it's good for people to know, man.
	I think a lot of people probably don't know that.
	And so, yeah, I think this is a neat way for people to know.
	You did.
	It's God's word.
	Good job.
	Fuck, dude.
	Yeah.
	We're helping people a little today.
	This episode is sponsored by Prize Picks.
	That's right.
	Do you love firing on sports?
	Well, Prize Picks is the best daily fantasy sports app for you.
	Sign up today and get $50 instantly when you play $5.
	You don't even need to win to receive the $50 bonus.
	It's guaranteed.
	You can fire on all your favorite sports like the NBA, MMA, NFL, college football, and many more.
	Instead of choosing teams, you choose individual players.
	That's what I love about prize picks.
	Each player has like a set projection, and you either choose more or less than that set projection.
	One Caleb Williams passing yard gets you one win on prize picks every week in September.
	That's right.
	Only one yard gets you an automatic win every football weekend in September.
	Four weeks of free Ws.
	So don't miss this deal on prize picks because it's gone when September ends.
	If you are smart with sports and you know what players are going to perform on what nights, then Prize Picks is the app for you.
	First-time users, download the PrizePicks app, use code Theo, and PrizePicks will instantly give you $50 on your first lineup of $5 or more.
	No strings attached.
	Put in $5 and instantly get a free $50 prize picks.
	Today's podcast is sponsored by Boot Barn, America's largest Western retailer supporting the cowboy and country lifestyles.
	I wore my Boot Barn boots in today's episode.
	Boot Barn opened their first store in 1978, and today they have over 400 stores nationwide located throughout 48 states, and they open a new store a week across the United States.
	Today, I had on those Cody James Black 1978 bad boys, son.
	Them beautiful hoof covers, baby.
	Exotic leather crafted by 90 boot artisans with premium exotic skin.
	Renowned for its durability and unique texture.
	Indeed, if you want those Cody James Black 1978 boots I was sporting, they are only available at Boot Barn.
	Visit bootbarn.com and use code Theo for 15% off one item through September 30th.
	That's bootbarn.com code Theo.
	Hey fellas, if you're like me and some women as well, if you're like me and you want your grooming to be a one and done deal, if you want to de-hair or organize your head hair and body hair, well, doing it all with the same trimmer, nu-uh, those days are over.
	Thankfully, Manscaped has come up with the ultimate package to keep your hairs trimmed from 12 to 6, maybe top to bottom.
	Introducing the beard and balls bundle featuring the lawnmower 5.0 and the beard hedger.
	Get 20% off in free shipping with the code Theo at manscaped.com.
	That's 20% off in free shipping with the code Theo at Manscaped.com.
	For the premium grooming experience, you should trust Manscaped and say goodbye to endless passes with your shaver or razor.
	This trimmer gets it done right the first time.
	Get 20% off and free shipping with the code Theo at manscaped.com.
	That's 20% off and free shipping with the code th eo at manscaped.com.
	No more juggling multiple tools or dealing with subpar results.
	Just efficient, effective grooming wherever you need.
	So you're going out on tour with the new album?
	Right.
	Wow.
	And do you feel like are you going to all the same markets?
	I think so.
	Yeah.
	I go where they tell me.
	Right.
	International as well?
	Probably afterwards, yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Tour is a lot of fun.
	It's just, you know, I got my two-year-old now, and it's hard being away from home for months, but I love playing music and seeing people sing these songs.
	It's so cool, man.
	You never know if that's like their one thing of the year, you know, and that's why like I've only missed a handful of shows and that kind of drives me nuts when artists miss shows, you know, and I know there's reasons oftentimes, but it's like, this could be their one thing of the year.
	And I just want to go and kick ass for people who they're willing to spend their hard-earned fucking money to come and see this piece of shit.
	Yeah.
	So I'm like, I want to bust my ass for everyone.
	So I'm, so I'm pumped, man.
	I'm ready to go.
	And who's going to be on the tour with you?
	Do you know?
	Will it change?
	What is that like?
	That's a great question.
	Openers right now.
	We're figuring it out.
	You figure it out.
	That's the way it goes.
	What's the process?
	Just finding who's right, you know, and I'm terrible.
	I'm much, I'm a procrastinator.
	So like I wait till the last minute to do things, which was the definition of procrastinator.
	I didn't need to say that last part.
	Some people didn't know.
	Some people are like, damn, he's a procrastinator.
	What?
	He's a procrastinator.
	What does that mean?
	He's been to spice schools.
	Well, I didn't know you could do that.
	Some people are like, what do you mean?
	Oh, he's a procrastinator.
	He dates men.
	Like, what does it mean?
	Yeah, some people don't know, dude.
	He eats mud.
	I think, yeah.
	No, I'm glad you sounded it out.
	Yeah, I had to.
	Absolutely.
	Yeah, but every school project, it was the night before.
	Dude, same.
	Yeah.
	So it's like a school project kind of for me.
	And there's so many great options.
	And that's why I just want, you know, that's my excuse.
	There's so many great options is I just want to make it right, you know.
	Yeah.
	And will you, yeah, will you change them up?
	Do you think you can alternate some of them off?
	Yeah, that's what we were kind of thinking of is having like either like local act start, which I love.
	I love doing that.
	And then, you know, either like take it in like quadrants or quarters, you know, and have, you know, different artists who are available come out and open up.
	And I think that's fun, you know, and that kind of encourages people if they want to, if they love that person to come to a show, even if they don't like me.
	And maybe then they will.
	You know what I mean?
	It's just like, you know, I just want people to have a great time, you know, and just come out and have fun.
	It feels like that, man.
	I felt like that last night.
	Like a lot of your energy is very like gratuitous.
	You're like just thanking people for coming and, you know, you feel a lot of like indebted almost in a way.
	Absolutely.
	There is so many.
	It's not like, I don't know that it's negative.
	Yes, sir.
	But you can feel like, oh, this guy, he really, he feels that we're here and that we've come to see him.
	Yeah, that's like for me, I know there's so many much more talented people.
	Like, fuck those naturally talented people that are just so awesome at everything.
	You know, Justin Bieber, I'm talking about.
	I'll name him right now.
	Justin Bieber, John Mayer, Rick Flair.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	Lil Debbie.
	Okay.
	Absolutely.
	That cake bitch that people call her on Reddit.
	And I didn't say it.
	And who else?
	Probably.
	Oh.
	Connor 3. Jesus Christ.
	Oh, damn, dude.
	Close.
	Same.
	Adam both.
	Fuck Paddington's barely.
	Okay, so Paddington's out.
	I love all of you, by the way.
	I'm just fucking around.
	Pattington's a fictional character.
	Jesus isn't.
	We'll put him in there.
	Beebs is very much real, though.
	Yeah, Beeves is real.
	And Rick Blair, I love both of you so much.
	But yeah, you know, it's like people could be anywhere in the world.
	And it is true.
	Oh, and it is true.
	And they spent their time hanging with me, and that means the fucking world to me.
	You know what I mean?
	Oh, that's what feels the toughest sometimes when you have a show that's kind of, you feel like, oh, it maybe didn't.
	And sometimes it's the acoustics, or sometimes it's the way that the venues shake that's like you don't even know.
	That's the toughest thing sometimes.
	Yeah.
	You know, like the venue, like you're playing in a hockey rink and you're like, well, this is not even built for this.
	Right.
	We're trying to make it this.
	We're all doing our best.
	And maybe you just feel like, what if they don't know that?
	You know, or like, I don't know.
	And at rehearsals, too, I didn't realize how steep it was.
	It's so steep going up.
	Like at the Opry.
	Oh.
	It's just like there's people all the way up here.
	And at rehearsals, I didn't even see that because that wasn't lit.
	My God.
	But maybe it was lit.
	And I just wasn't paying attention.
	Yeah, maybe you were lit.
	But I came in and I, yeah, absolutely.
	Well, absolutely.
	That's a given.
	But I walked out and I was like, oh, shit, there's a lot of folks here.
	This is crazy.
	I think it's eats 5,000 people.
	It's so cool.
	It's so cool.
	It was magical, man.
	We sat next to, there was a Japanese family, and I'm paraphrasing because they may or may not have been Japanese, but they were near Japan or semi-near.
	Okay.
	And they were in, they were enjoying, it was unbelievable.
	I'm like, wow.
	I'm at the grand old Opry and I'm with a Japanese family enjoying Postman.
	It was awesome.
	It's pretty cool.
	You can't write it.
	It's so good.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	What's your kiddo like?
	I don't know if I...
	Oh, it's a baby.
	It's a girl.
	Oh, sweet.
	She's a stud.
	She was there last night.
	She's really.
	She was?
	You saw her.
	She's about 6'4 ⁇ .
	Oh, dang.
	She's massive.
	She might have dunked on you.
	That's her thing.
	She loves dunking.
	She's like, she's probably two feet tall.
	Oh, yeah.
	She's so cool, man.
	Like, it changes everything.
	It's so bitching.
	Were you there when she was born?
	I pulled her out of the coochie.
	No, you didn't.
	Yeah, I did.
	They let me bring my katana in.
	What kind of shoes did you wear?
	Close-toed.
	Obviously.
	I don't know if there's anybody.
	Close-toed shoes.
	I think that's what God wants.
	Yeah, you have to.
	Well, it's like science class because you're figuring this shit out.
	It's like whenever you had an Erlenmeyer flask or whatever, you're like, I don't fucking know what the hell's going on.
	Close-toed shoes.
	No flammable clothing and hair tied back.
	Anybody that wears open-toed shoes to their child's birth is obviously, first of all, a Jimmy Buffett fan.
	Well, fuck yeah.
	Well, that's the one exception.
	I think Jimmy Buffett could wear thongs to the child's birth, I think.
	Well, what are you supposed to wear?
	I don't know what you're supposed to wear.
	It makes sense to wear like a suit, right?
	It makes sense to dress up.
	Yeah, like a thumb.
	Exactly.
	Yeah.
	Living on umbilical fluid.
	I like fucking, yeah.
	That was crazy.
	It makes sense also.
	It'd be cool to prank the shit out of your kid, doesn't know anything, and just wear full camo.
	Balaclava, everything, just full realtree or fucking multi-cam anything.
	And she can't see you.
	Oh, you just pull out.
	She thinks she's floating.
	Yeah.
	And everyone else does too.
	And then years later, there's a game show.
	It's a big reveal.
	Exactly.
	Or, yeah, you wear camo your whole life.
	Oh, yes.
	And then it's like, who is my father?
	Whoop, there it is.
	There he is, my dad.
	Or she picks Willie from Duck Dynasty, and you're like, cool.
	Yeah, cool.
	Fuck, I wish Willie from, no, I don't.
	I love my dad so much.
	But if I had two dads, it would be Willie and my dad.
	And Willie Robertson is so funny, dude.
	What a stud, man.
	Bro, he's one of the funniest guys.
	Yeah, inside.
	I was in the castle.
	Uncle Silver.
	Dude, I love that.
	Savage.
	I love that, man.
	I forgot about that show.
	A lot of people have that.
	That show was huge.
	Huge.
	So crazy.
	Good for them, dude.
	People were doing duck calls.
	People were.
	Yeah, what's it like?
	I don't have any children yet.
	I want to have some children, I think, but I just got to get a wife and stuff.
	And I just been working so much.
	Was it hard to make the choice to have a child?
	No.
	I've been horny for a long time.
	No.
	Yeah.
	I've always wanted to be a dad.
	And for a long time, I always told myself, like, when I was younger and going through shit, like, you know, coming up when I was like, you know, 20, 21, 22, and all that, I was like, oh, I need a kid.
	But that was to like, it's a, for a selfish reason.
	It was to fill something that I felt like I was missing.
	But at one point, I was like, I want to create a fucking awesome life and create life.
	And whenever I realized that it wasn't for a selfish reason, then I was like, let's fucking do it.
	And then I made a baby with my jizz.
	And it's fucking awesome.
	It's cool.
	Is it?
	It's so cool.
	Like, oh, I was saying, I pulled her right out.
	No way you did.
	By the head.
	I did.
	I got gluffed up.
	And they let you do it.
	There's not somebody there.
	Is there a lifeguard or something?
	Well, I don't know.
	My doctor was such a baller.
	was?
	Would you meet him on the app or whatever?
	Yeah, well, she was...
	I don't know.
	I'm just joking.
	The app.
	It sounds like my doctor was such a baller.
	What do you guys need?
	I met her on WikiFeet, actually.
	She had a 4.98, and I was like, this is good enough.
	Oh, my bad.
	But you couldn't see it because of the shoe rule.
	The close-toed, you know, you can't wear open-toed shoes.
	But she was like, I'm joking too much.
	At one time, she looked at me and she goes, scrub up.
	And I'm like, what?
	And fucking, I did.
	And then I grabbed her head and I like, uh-uh.
	I pulled her out.
	And how, and so I'm trying to equate the like, how hard did it feel like you had to pull tough or was it easy?
	You gotta pull hard, scary hard because no babies are really floppy, you know, floppy and malleable, like pure gold.
	One of the most malleable of metals.
	You can make gold out of anything, I've heard.
	Is that true?
	I don't know.
	I heard that on a Joe Rogan podcast.
	Alchemy.
	Is that what he said?
	No, I remember you and him talking about that.
	Actually, it's so crazy that hit my head.
	What did I say?
	I don't remember what happened.
	I just remember...
	It makes sense.
	Yeah, it was perfect.
	Well, I did make gold out of anything.
	If you call Jiz anything, am I right?
	And if you call your daughter gold, which you do.
	That's what I call her.
	That's her name.
	That's awesome.
	Yeah.
	And she's like, scrub up, pull her out, pull it hard, because you're scared you don't want to break them.
	But that's the thing.
	And where do you pull?
	Do you pull it from under the arms?
	Like one of those crazy chiropractors.
	You seen those guys?
	Oh, my God.
	You see that one?
	Like a fucking Mortal Kombat fatality.
	I'm like, no way you pay to get fatality by this fucking dude in fucking Incino.
	Have you seen Brother Neck Magic?
	I don't think I'd like to.
	Brother.
	Can you pull up some Brother Neck Magic?
	Some Brother Neck Magic if you can, real quick.
	There you go.
	Let's see that.
	It might be it.
	Crazy Chiropractic Injection.
	This sounds like a fucking mixtape from Crazy Chiropractic Neck Pain Injection.
	This is fire.
	Dude, how there isn't.
	Slide on this lady.
	When does he pull her spine out?
	Like with her skull attached.
	this lady's never gonna be able to read again dude so Fuck, she's dead.
	I saw that.
	Do the one where they put the wakeboarding rope up to the neck or whatever.
	That's the crazy one, dude.
	And I think they do that down in Orlando during the wakeboarding championships or whatever.
	Yeah, deep wide strap adjustment.
	Bro, you've been involved in this.
	If your kid ends up doing this, that's going to be full circle, bro.
	Yeah, get to the big pull at the end where they look at that.
	Yeah, where the lady tells all her secrets right after.
	Oh, sorry.
	Lay your head back down.
	You have like cowboy chiropractors just rope you and fucking and then you're like, all right, you're good.
	Go home.
	Chin strap on.
	Look at this.
	This is insane.
	Okay, obviously.
	So you didn't use this.
	Use the hands, huh?
	Use my bare hands with gloves.
	Nitrile gloves.
	I think they were five millimeters.
	Do you okay?
	Okay.
	So we'll do our 30-second hold.
	We know about gloves.
	Well, this is a lot.
	No, no, no.
	30-second hold and then we'll do our tug, okay?
	Yeah.
	There you go.
	Get up to that.
	Yeah, that mustard plates.
	Oh, my God.
	Oh, there you go.
	Fuck, dude.
	It's a lot.
	Small pops.
	Why?
	So when you get around, what do you guys do then?
	Who gets, is your, um, Yes, sir.
	She is.
	She's full awake.
	She's not on her phone or anything, is she?
	She's on Clash of Clans.
	Like, get this shit out of me.
	Sorry, man.
	One day your daughter's going to watch it.
	That guy was an asshole.
	I need to know, have you ever found any subscriptions that you were still paying for and you didn't realize it?
	I got involved with the online chili thing and they would send you chili every month.
	And I moved out of that place and forgot.
	And they were still just sending chili to the old address.
	Thankfully, I located that old subscription and was able to shut it down.
	Rocket Money is how I did it.
	Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so that you can grow your savings.
	With Rocket Money, I can see all my subscriptions in one place.
	And if I see something I don't want, Rocket Money can help me cancel it with a few taps.
	That easy.
	Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's features.
	Stop wasting money on things you don't use, like unwanted chili.
	Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash T-H-E-O.
	That's rocketmoney.com slash Theo.
	Rocketmoney.com slash Theo.
	Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp.
	If you've had trouble in your life, maybe you're having trouble associating with your family.
	You're having trouble associating with yourself.
	If you're having trouble meeting someone or if you're having trouble, things have changed.
	They were good.
	Now they're rough.
	BetterHelp can help.
	That's true.
	If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try.
	It's entirely online.
	It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule.
	Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist.
	And you can switch therapists at any time for no additional cost.
	And I recommend that.
	A lot of times I would have a therapist on BetterHelp or just in a therapy I found locally.
	And I'd be afraid to switch therapist.
	I was just afraid.
	I didn't want to let them down.
	It's not about letting them down.
	It's about building you up.
	Never skip a therapy day with BetterHelp.
	Visit betterhelp.com slash T-H-E-O today to get 10% off your first month.
	That's better H-E-L-P, betterhelp.com slash Theo.
	And we thank BetterHelp for supporting and sponsoring this podcast.
	Yeah, man.
	I've been to a chiropractor and I always tell them, don't touch me right when I get there.
	That's the first thing you say.
	So you do not have consent to touch me.
	That's the thing.
	And then it's kind of like the WWE guy.
	The telekinetic.
	Oh, yeah.
	That'll be your thing.
	You don't have consent.
	Well, I'll show you.
	Well, you don't have to touch them.
	Yeah, you can just fucking like, that's kind of a thing.
	Yeah.
	I'm surprised no one's done it yet.
	It'll happen soon, man.
	Well, it's like Reiki.
	What do they call that stuff?
	Reiki?
	Yeah, that energy healing.
	Like, even if you go to Maui, people offer that.
	I haven't tried it.
	Have you tried?
	Like, I'll do Reiki.
	I'll sell you dope.
	There's like, there's a, just a dude by the beach.
	He's like, I'll sell you a bracelet, weed, and do some Reiki on you right now.
	You're like, he's like, for 40 bucks.
	Fuck.
	It's a package.
	40 large.
	Yeah, 40 large, homie.
	You're like, I mean, for 44,000.
	Think of all the Reiki.
	Yeah, it'd be a lot of Reiki, dude.
	Your single with Morgan already went, it's to the moon, dude.
	When you sang that last night, I had some red.
	It's a lot of words.
	People loved it.
	How long did it take to shoot the video?
	Where did you guys shoot that at?
	We shot that in a day near Stagecoach.
	So we were doing Stagecoach the day after, I think.
	And Morgan had some time, and we had time, and we just got together.
	I think the last time that flag was used was like at Joe Biden's inauguration.
	No way.
	That's what they were saying.
	The flag was huge.
	I've never seen anything like it.
	It was dope.
	Some of those shots, you can see the flag of this.
	It's really cool.
	Very cool.
	Morgan's so funny, dude.
	He's amazing.
	Who wrote the song?
	Did you guys write it together or did you guys?
	Yeah, we wrote it together.
	We cut another song, too.
	I think I did it.
	I think I remember doing a verse.
	It's one of those long nights, but it was that song's awesome, too.
	Is it out yet or no?
	No, sir.
	Okay.
	I don't know if he's going to do anything with it, but the song, I remember it being awesome.
	Also, I was having a lot of fun.
	But yeah, we were just all together and Cheese was there and Urn and it was just killer.
	I love writing songs with my buddies.
	And that's like you go and you look at the writers on each of these songs on the record is because it's not like there's a lot of motherfuckers on every song.
	And because like I've never been here.
	I don't know like before months ago.
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	Before like six, seven months ago, like I'd never worked here.
	And I didn't know it was like a nine to five kind of deal.
	But we would go to the studio at like 7 p.m.
	and stay till like 4 in the morning.
	And we would all just hang out and have some beers and smoke and laugh.
	And that's, I think, like, like I said earlier, you know, that's just how songs get made.
	You're like, oh, that's a song.
	Let's build around it.
	And then someone comes in with the next line and you're like, oh, that's fucking killing.
	And you just keep going.
	And it snowballs into a song, you know?
	I knew during the pandemic, I remember telling people like, hey, Morgan is the next Elvis Presley.
	Like, do you guys realize like he had a trainer and one of his trainers is now also works security with him.
	Yes, sir.
	And so we would go train with the guy and he and I would go out on, I think it was like 17th or 18th Street in Nashville and be doing like reps out there and like walking up hills with the weights and stuff.
	And it was like, now he could never do that.
	Oh, yeah.
	But then we'd be out there just doing our reps and stuff like that.
	It was me, him, sometimes Earn.
	And Ernie Earn came out sparingly, but he came out, brother.
	Love you.
	Yeah.
	Ern came out sparingly, but he came out.
	And yeah, and I was like, dude, I was like, I was, I remember telling my friends, like, he's the next Elvis Presley.
	Do you think he's the bet that he'll go down as like the greatest country artist of all time?
	I have a little bias.
	I love Hank Sr.
	Hank Sr. for me will always be my favorite.
	Hank and Johnny.
	And he's definitely the most massive.
	It's just unprecedented.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, and I, he has such a great heart.
	You know, he gets in a little trouble.
	He's got such a great heart, man.
	And I love that dude to death.
	And I don't think that he won't be, you know, the biggest artist of all time, maybe.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, it's a trajectory.
	It's fucking insane.
	It really is insane.
	Yeah.
	I mean, every one of his, so many of the songs are the craziest thing about Morgan, I'll be around Morgan and I'll just start singing one of his songs because it's stuck in my head.
	It's so you feel like a weirdo.
	But then you're like, oh, I can't sing that song.
	And you'll sing another song.
	What you got to do is change the lyrics and then tell him you wrote it.
	And then he might use it.
	And then.
	Oh, I see what you're saying.
	Yeah.
	And then you get songwriting credits.
	You know what I mean?
	Look at that shit, man.
	Morgan Wallen matches Adele and Elvis with another week at number one.
	And what does that mean when they say they match?
	This is an article here in Forbes.
	Morgan Wallen leads the Billboard 200 charts this week with his blockbuster release, One Thing at a Time, as the country star earns another turn at number one.
	His set joins an exclusive club and helps a singer match an impressive feat that's only been managed by a handful of the biggest names in music.
	It's insane.
	It's insane.
	No, it's bigger.
	It's bigger than fucking life.
	Like in Australia, even in Australia and UK, everything.
	It's insane.
	Yeah.
	I think he has his trial for that, throwing that thing off the building or whatever.
	What's that?
	What thing?
	Yeah, we don't have to go into it.
	I hear there's a sign now.
	Oh, that says about the chair.
	Yeah, it's like, don't even try.
	You're not Morgan or something.
	That's what I heard.
	Really?
	Yeah, that's what I heard.
	That's the sign that says, don't throw anything off this building.
	You're not Morgan.
	Verbatim is what I heard.
	I haven't seen it.
	I haven't been into Eric's bar.
	I'm trying to think what I would throw off a building, dude.
	Oh, dude, you know what I'll throw off a building?
	I would throw a replica of the building off the building so that that's fire.
	Because if Somebody's like, hey, I just got hit by that building.
	And then the officer would be like, what are you talking about?
	Like, yeah, I just got hit by a really small building of that building.
	And the officer would be like, you're going to jail.
	You're on drugs to the other officer.
	Like, say there's a random stranger walking on the street, and I throw like a replica of like a, I mean, like a state capitol.
	I'm up there at the top, 200 stories up.
	I throw that bitch off.
	And it's a replica of the building that I'm in.
	It hits somebody like, oh, shit, dude.
	Drop my fucking five guys, you know?
	And they tell the police, hey, somebody just threw that building at me.
	Now, there's a couple things that you can't get in trouble for throwing off of a building.
	What?
	If it's a brick building, bricks.
	Yeah.
	Because you'd be like, oh, it's going down.
	It's falling.
	It's like, or it's just age, you know?
	And also bird shit.
	You can throw as much bird shit off of a building as you want.
	Because who's going to prove it that you did it?
	Who's going to prove that you did it?
	Oh, you saying I'm a bird?
	Oh, you saying I'm throwing bird shit on people down there?
	Prove it.
	What about the birds?
	Exactly.
	What's another thing you could throw off the roof of a building?
	Oh, a little meteor.
	Yeah, a little meteoric.
	A piece of Gibbons meteor.
	Yeah, a little meteor.
	It's just throwing pieces of a meteor off the roof.
	Whatever, man.
	Free Morgan, dude.
	Nobody got hit, baby.
	Free Morgan, man.
	That's all I'm saying, dude.
	Dude, did you ever get to meet like Elvis Press or anything like that?
	Yep.
	Did you really?
	No.
	I was born in 1995.
	Oh, and when was Elvis...
	Have you been to Graceland?
	I jumped in the pool.
	What?
	Why?
	They let me.
	Nuh.
	Was it After Hours or something?
	It was for, I think, a New Year's thing.
	And he died 77. You're way off, Theovon.
	My bad, dude.
	My bad.
	Well, it's crazy, yeah.
	But like, we did that deal.
	I played Devil in Disguise and they let me jump in the pool.
	Wow.
	It was amazing.
	I love Elvis Presley.
	Yeah.
	It was so cool.
	It's now or never.
	Yeah, it's Christmas stuff, man.
	Dude, the craziest thing about Graceland, I didn't know he's buried there.
	I didn't know that either.
	So we're going on the tour and like, this is a lamp and stuff.
	This is where Elvis used to hug his wife and kiss his mama.
	You had a cool tour guy.
	This guy, he's a pervert.
	And he said, kiss his mama 40 times in a row.
	He'd be like, kisses his mama.
	Like, he would kiss his mama.
	What was his name?
	Huh?
	What was his name?
	I think his name was, it was like, kind of like this, it was like a redneck sort of Native American.
	I think his name was like Featherbed or something.
	And he'd be like, and he was like, what did he?
	And people, and there's some old women that are like, and I'm like, and then he's like, and I'm like, watch that guy's lips all the way.
	What's up with this dude, right?
	And there's no manager there.
	You're just stuck with whoever the tour guide is, dude, you know?
	He wasn't even a guy.
	He was just a guy.
	He just came.
	Oh, featherbear.
	But then we get out the back and I'm like, you guys want to go smoke?
	You can go out there.
	So there's people out there and I'm vaping and his grave is right.
	I'm like, wait, he's buried here.
	I did not know that.
	Yeah.
	It blew my mind.
	I didn't know that.
	Yeah.
	It's a beautiful, beautiful place.
	And it's like crazy.
	Like, they say, I didn't get to go up in the room.
	It was late.
	But they say nothing's been touched in the room, in his bedroom.
	And like his slippers are still there and everything like that.
	Crazy.
	The museum part of it.
	Like, where you can go in and see like the books he was reading and everything like that.
	Like the JFK assassination book that he was reading.
	Like that's the last book he was reading.
	Like crazy.
	Yeah.
	It's pretty cool.
	So he was kind of a conspiracy guy.
	Yeah.
	What do you think?
	Maybe.
	Maybe that's the conspiracy itself.
	Maybe there is no conspiracy.
	Tommy did like to kiss his mom on the like guy.
	We understand.
	There's like a tour group of four people like, what's up with this dude?
	He like a kiss, mama.
	I like Featherbed.
	He sounds cool.
	He old featherbed.
	What was your mom like, dude?
	Is your mom a cool lady?
	Because you have a stepmom, right?
	Yes, sir.
	And do you have a real mom, too?
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	Yep.
	Because I don't know if some people are adopted.
	I don't know if you had a real mom.
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	My mom's name's Nicole.
	Oh, that's a nice name.
	It's a lovely name.
	It's my mom's name.
	Stepmom's name is Jodi.
	Oh, that's a nice name, too.
	Thank you.
	It's my stepmom's name.
	My mom's name is Gina.
	It's a beautiful name.
	You know what name I like?
	Emilou.
	I think that's a pretty name.
	No?
	Yeah.
	You don't like it?
	No, I did.
	I liked it.
	At first, I was like, but then I was like, yeah, Emilou.
	I like it.
	What name do you like for your daughter?
	Featherback.
	I like Moira.
	Moira's a beautiful name.
	That's a Magic the Gathering name.
	Is it really?
	You play Magic the Gathering?
	Moira.
	No, no, no, no.
	We play, what do we play?
	Sometimes Jin, Rummy, or whatever.
	But we never done anything.
	We've never gotten crazy.
	One time my uncle was on weed or whatever, and we played it.
	That was about as Magic the Gathering as we got.
	So it's more just Jin.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Not as much rummy.
	Yeah.
	A lot of Jin.
	Yeah, my ex-girlfriend, Megan, me and her family used to play some sort of rummy.
	You like the name Megan?
	I do like the name Megan, actually.
	It's a little aggressive.
	Yeah.
	But I think sometimes women might need aggression, you know?
	Sure.
	So I think, yeah, I like Moira, Megan.
	I like Moira.
	You like M stuff.
	Amy Lou's good, though.
	I like Mario.
	That's M, essentially.
	Amy Lou seems to sound like she's going to be the rogue agent of those three.
	She sounds like a hard ass.
	Amy Lou is going to be getting.
	I thought about that last night.
	I also like the name Lou Ellen.
	Sounds like an elf name.
	Like an elf?
	From Lord of the Rings.
	Okay.
	Right?
	Yeah.
	You could imagine like Aragon going to meet with Lou Ellen.
	Lou Ellen.
	Well, that's like no country for old man.
	Maybe at a Loves truck stop, I think.
	I can imagine.
	When Aragon goes to the Loves.
	Aragon at the Mapco is fucking.
	He's got to pick up some fucking sick shades.
	He just goes to the Twitch.
	He's got to get a t-shirt now.
	Twin Towers that just says fucking fucking.
	He's got a t-shirt that says, get your motor running on it.
	He's got big Peter Bilt fucking like fucking.
	It goes fucks up some orcs, dude.
	Killer.
	I love that.
	We were talking about moms.
	I don't know how that happened.
	I was just curious.
	I didn't know if, like, yeah, I was just, I guess I was just wondering, where do you get your influence to be like, I think when I was a kid, I always wanted my mom to see me, you know?
	And so it made me like want to, I think even at the time, if I wasn't like, I remember my mom, sometimes like if we, if we had misbehaved, we'd have to go downstairs and perform for my mom so we could get out of punishment, right?
	And I think a lot of kids have had to do that.
	Or it's not, it wasn't like a set thing, but it was like we try to be like, all right, we got to do something for mom.
	Mom's smart.
	She's hardworking.
	Let's don't waste her time.
	Let's make a 120-second play.
	You know what I'm saying?
	Take Shark Tank.
	And Shakespeare meets Reservoir Dogs.
	We're going to go in there.
	And my two little sisters are like, what's happening?
	And I'm like, shut up.
	Remember your minds and get the fuck in there, dude, and put the bra on, dude.
	And they're like, we're children.
	And I'm like, who's the bra?
	Huh?
	It doesn't matter, dude.
	The rules are the rules.
	And so we would go in there and we would try to make the play and I would try to be the director.
	I'm one of the actors.
	And it was just a nightmare, whatever.
	But sometimes my mom would have so much fun out of it that she would be like, okay, I'll let you watch TV for half an hour.
	Or you wouldn't get in trouble.
	Yeah.
	Right.
	We'd be excuse.
	Or sometimes she would say, you guys are the fucking, she's like, this is why I don't go see shows in this area.
	And you guys need to go to bed.
	You know?
	But that was fair because we were already in trouble.
	What was your biggest hit, you think?
	We did this sort of like, it was kind of like Boy Meets World, kind of like a Paw Patrol mashup, right?
	Okay.
	And it was, some people would say it's nothing.
	Whatever.
	We thought so much of it.
	We thought so much of it.
	And one of the animals got fleas.
	We had a small Dalmatian that got fleas, played by my sister.
	And she dies immediately, right?
	In the first 40 seconds.
	And then the last 120 seconds is there's a mourning and a small wedding.
	Okay.
	Small, like a small family and friends type stuff.
	It's not like nothing big.
	Right.
	To go from death to fucking, yeah.
	Life.
	Well, essentially, you know, like the creation of life.
	Yes.
	And so stuff like that, yeah.
	So I think there was some things my mom appreciated about it.
	But yeah, I was just wondering, like, what was your, like, did you get, like, where do you get your idea that you wanted to be seen in the world, you know?
	And maybe that, maybe that never happened to you.
	Maybe you're just having fun and you're like, I'm having fun.
	Well, whenever she let me out of, we had a little like two by two kind of room and had all these locks on it.
	So whenever she sent me a piece of cheese with a post-it note that said, come on out, I want to hang out.
	I was like, so pumped.
	So you can't believe, you can believe how pumped I was.
	Oh, I can imagine it, dude.
	Oh, and that fucking crap single.
	A raw craft single with the post-it on the front says, come out.
	And I was so pumped.
	No, you know, I don't know.
	She's always loved me so much.
	All my parents have.
	And I'm so, you know, lucky to have such supportive parents.
	And, you know, it's awesome, too.
	They got me into music.
	Like my mom and my grandma.
	My grandma would be flipping up, you know, seeing me play the fucking Opry.
	And my dad, he was a wedding DJ and he loved metal and hip-hop and all that.
	And it's just everything together gave me the appreciation of just music in general.
	Like, you know, I'm a believer that like, you know, it doesn't, everything doesn't need to be super pigeonholed.
	There's fucking beauty and love in every piece of music.
	And that's why you listen to fucking everything.
	And that's the best part about it, you know?
	It's just, you know, oh, I feel like fucking this today.
	I feel like this today, you know, and it's the best, you know?
	I think that's the best thing about being your own DJ is you get to like, you know, I want to play this, I want to play this, and I'm going to play this, you know?
	That's what I feel like you are in a lot of ways, in some ways.
	And I don't mean that in any, in any weird way, but I feel like you're, you're not America's DJ, but you're like.
	That's cool.
	That's cool.
	Say that.
	You're America's DJ, right?
	I mean, you're born on the 4th of July.
	That's true.
	That's true.
	I mean, what else are we asking for?
	What the hell's going on?
	I'm American.
	But it's like, I think people find so much joy through you, you know?
	Does that feel like a lot of pressure?
	Because everybody loves you, you know?
	Not necessarily true.
	That's true.
	You're right.
	Maybe that's a weird question, man.
	I'm sorry to say it.
	It's kind of weird.
	What's that?
	No, not at all.
	But people, I don't know.
	I think people relate to you for some reason.
	And I don't even know if it's always because of music.
	Yeah, it's just, dude.
	I think people relate to somebody trying to be themselves.
	Yes, sir.
	And find themselves through a medium.
	Yes, sir.
	Whether it be music or art or dance or affection.
	Yeah, I don't know.
	I guess some of it is judgment.
	I don't mean it that way.
	I think it's more me trying to explore you because I think that it's an interesting thing.
	Well, no, it's just like, I'm, I think people appreciate and can relate to being yourself.
	And that's like, that's what everyone wants to do.
	It's hard for us.
	It is hard.
	It's terrible now.
	You know, it's like there's so many societal pressures.
	I don't know.
	And then with the, with the pickup of social media and how it just moves at 100 miles a minute.
	We talked about this a little bit earlier, but it's just 100 miles a minute and you can't like you don't have time to even if you this is who you are, you're gonna I feel the pressure to go with the next thing.
	You know what I mean?
	It's like I that's why I feel bad like for some of these kids that are just you know super immersed in social media.
	And because it's a crazy fucking place.
	Yeah.
	And I'm having this like debate with myself.
	It's like, oh, like when do I let my daughter have a account and shit?
	And even less like a like a smartphone.
	You know what I mean?
	I'm happy with her running around with one of those like, what are they called?
	Like ladybug phones or whatever that has like your mom's number, your dad's number, all this shit.
	Yeah, I think it's a T-Mobile sidekick or whatever.
	The alias too or whatever where it went like this.
	Or dude, what if your daughter had like one of those CB radios?
	Like you actually gave her one in her crib or whatever, or, you know, or whatever crib she has at two and a half years old.
	If she's still in there, and that's fine.
	And I say, hey, keep middle seven.
	But what if she had in there?
	She's just sitting in her crib and she's like, break her, break her.
	Well, we take certification very seriously.
	So once she can pass a cert class, then we can get her the CB.
	I don't want her fucking wild rogue on the airwaves.
	Right.
	We don't need that.
	Hey, this is full diaper to gray squirrel.
	You remember that song?
	Full diaper to gray squirrel.
	Come back, come pick me up.
	What are you doing?
	You remember that song?
	Right with that name.
	It was about like Teddy Bear.
	And it was about this kid and his dad had passed or something and he got a hold of his CB radio and was just like, hey, I want to be a truck driver one day.
	I love everything.
	And then they all come and take him for a ride in their truck and stuff like that.
	It's a really sweet thing.
	It was a song?
	Yes, sir.
	I would be tempted to call the police or report him at least because I know for a fact he's not certified.
	So it's a very sweet song.
	But I don't want to do that, but I have to.
	You know what I mean?
	Hey, rules are rules.
	Oh, dude, you're so fucked.
	You're going to be getting a big fine.
	It's the most I've laughed in a long time.
	Rules are rules, dude.
	Dude, what do you think?
	If you met an alien, right?
	What do you, what song would you play for them, right?
	This is a big question.
	So say aliens come, we send you to meet them, and they're like, send me?
	Huh?
	Me?
	Dude, it's out of you, the rock, and probably a diversity higher, okay?
	Because some people don't consider the rock diverse anymore.
	So yeah, it's out of you.
	A little bit of the show me what you got.
	Right.
	So, and what song do you play for the aliens, right?
	Because it's got to be a banger, because if the first one isn't a banger, it's going to be a rap, dude.
	Shit.
	When them pigs try to spit at you, drop it like it's hard.
	That's fire.
	No, that's fire.
	I think it'd probably be Fireball Pitple.
	Get him ready, go, Mr. Thrill Doe 5. No problem.
	Get him ready to fucking go.
	Like, hey, all right, let's go.
	How does that song go?
	Fireball.
	Yeah, yeah, dude.
	I've heard that.
	I was at a dinner a couple months ago, and Pitbull plays, right?
	And we're standing there in the audience.
	And I think it's me and like.
	You can't play Pitbull at dinner.
	Well, that's kind of rule, dude.
	That's what I thought.
	And Pitbull's on, and we're like, how do we know this is a real Pitbull?
	Like, there could be 30 Pitbulls playing around America right now.
	He went to perform.
	It was Pitbull?
	Pitbull, they said, was playing.
	But then we looked at the guy and we're like, this could be any Uber driver.
	You never get close-up shots of Pitbull.
	And he's always got big glasses.
	Yes.
	It was like, dude, there could be seven Pitbulls playing right now.
	It's just like birds aren't real.
	Maybe fucking Pitbull ain't real.
	Apple ain't real.
	Maybe, is this a good?
	First of all, this is...
	This is any Uber.
	I don't see that.
	Right.
	And that's me saying it.
	You don't have to say it.
	And that's fine, dude.
	But yeah.
	Oh, no.
	I don't see these.
	Kind of.
	Is that Pitbull on the right?
	Who knows?
	Baby, look at that.
	Nobody knows if it's Pitbull.
	Is that a mug shot?
	Go back to this one.
	Is that a mug shot?
	Because if that's a mug shot, that's the hardest mugshot of all time.
	That's not Pitbull.
	That's Jeff Bezos, of course.
	Let's see, right there.
	It could have been anybody.
	It could be Pitbull.
	It could be Wamarana.
	How about Jeff Bezos getting down?
	Look at the heart glasses.
	Where is he here?
	What festival is this?
	Bro, he's delivering packages.
	You feel me?
	He digs?
	That's all I'm saying.
	That guy, dude, my friend told me that he can bust big loads, dude.
	I make that up.
	I make that up.
	My buddy told me he's bust fat nuts.
	My buddy told me he got big busts.
	That's just random.
	You're on the elevator tour and Featherbed comes and says, did you hear about Jeff Bezos?
	He's busting fat nuts.
	They call him Jeff Bustos.
	I've been kissing your mother.
	And this is where Elvis used to kiss his mom.
	Overnight delivery.
	Kick decide what's going on.
	What is this show about?
	Jesus Christ.
	You were saying, I'm so sorry.
	You saying.
	No, I'm saying it'd be nine.
	Exactly.
	Let's get back.
	So, anyways, you got a stepmom.
	I like this Jeff Bezos, though, I'll say.
	Well, I'll say this.
	The guy's incredible.
	He's obviously an incredible businessman.
	Well, I like this version.
	Whatever he's up to.
	He's an amazing.
	I can't even believe.
	Amazon is going to like.
	It's going to probably be very dystopian.
	It's going to be scary, I think.
	What does dystopian mean?
	Like kind of like Orwellian.
	Okay, so like foreign, mystical, spacey.
	Exactly.
	I think that that's verbatim the definition.
	I just think like it's like very thought-policey.
	there you go.
	Okay, here we go.
	Dystopian, relating to or denoting an imagined state of society where there is great suffering or injustice, the dystopian future of a society bereft of reason.
	And then the noun is a person who imagines or foresees a state or society where there's great suffering or injustice.
	So it's like, I think with all the drones, like you now, we were just in San Francisco and our driver got cut off by a self-driving car.
	No.
	And you can't even cuss him out.
	And how do you go home to your wife after that?
	Exactly.
	It's just like, you seen the Tim Robinson show?
	He's so funny, isn't he?
	He's so funny.
	But there's the one where he goes to a magic show with his wife and the magician brings him up on stage and just like makes fun of his suit or whatever.
	And they go home and his wife's like laying there.
	He embarrassed you.
	And she like, they get divorced all this shit because the magician on stage made fun of his suit and just like made jokes.
	But yeah, cut off by a self-drunk car.
	100%.
	And it gets to this point to where it's like all humanity is lost.
	And now even with social media, it's like it's very thought-policey and we police each other.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Even then voluntarily.
	Voluntarily is what we do.
	And then now everything is heard and seen and everything.
	So it's just like, I can't tell you how many times I've been on my phone and thought about something.
	And then the next time I Google something, it comes up.
	I didn't even say it out loud.
	It's just there.
	Like I was thinking like, oh, maybe how sick would it be to like jack off on a jet ski in my head?
	Totally.
	And I get on Google and buy the jet ski WikiFeet and then get this jet ski.
	You know what I mean?
	It's like fucking crazy.
	And like, how does that even work?
	Does it just know you so well that it knows what you're going to think at this moment?
	It's just going crazy.
	And it's the biggest company in the world.
	Amazon.
	Yeah.
	My mom delivers for them.
	Has she experienced any of that stuff?
	I mean, she said, no, she's nothing.
	Yeah.
	She hadn't met anyone.
	Well, it's just like the Roombas and shit.
	You know what I mean?
	They scan your whole house.
	Yeah.
	And it is convenient, but convenient is not always the best way.
	Sorry to cut you off, sorry.
	No, dude, I'm cutting you off.
	And it's like, I'm sorry to cut you off, but it's.
	It's okay, sir.
	It's okay.
	Thank you.
	Fucker.
	I'll go.
	I'll go.
	But it's like, yeah, it's, yeah, I don't know.
	I don't know what we turn into more and more as things get, you know, Bernie Sanders was just on and he was talking about, and I loved it too.
	I got to say that.
	Yes, sir.
	I loved.
	I was a Bernie fan.
	I'll say it, you know.
	He seems awesome.
	Yeah.
	And I don't know all, I don't know every one of his policies, but I was a fan of him.
	He seems like a great guy to crack a beer with or just hang out with.
	And he comes in and he's like, and he's got his bag with him and every zipper on the bag is open.
	And so immediately I was like, that's me.
	That's my guy.
	Every guy working so hard.
	Keep going.
	Every zipper's open.
	There's visine in one and like a couple masks in the other.
	He pulls a vanilla folder out.
	He looks through it.
	He's like, he puts that down, looks at the cookies we got for him.
	Not interested.
	I think he wanted ginger snaps.
	We didn't.
	It's an old-time retreat.
	I agree.
	We thought current treats are bad.
	Yes, sir.
	And he goes, I'm ready.
	And so we start talking, man.
	And it was just great.
	You know, he wanted healthcare for everybody.
	And the things he wants, it's like normal stuff.
	It's like you just want people to feel safe and normal.
	But yeah, I just loved his authenticity.
	I don't know where this was going.
	Jesus, I'm an idiot.
	It's okay, Theo, Von.
	You're fine to me.
	Thanks, man.
	I can't believe this is a show.
	Isn't that wild?
	I can't believe it.
	Isn't that wild?
	Dude, we tape above my garage.
	There are people with lots in different cities or whatever.
	We tape above my garage.
	I can't believe you said top 10 in the whole world.
	You need to just start saying more wild shit.
	You tape to number one.
	Yeah, just say the most wild thing you can into that camera right now.
	I'll go to jail, dude.
	Trust me.
	And just for you sitting in it, you'll go to jail too.
	Fuck.
	And I'll say, Theo, that's bad.
	Yeah.
	He like to kiss his mother goodbye.
	I'll tell you that.
	We've gotten wild enough, dude.
	So the country tour, will there be any freaking thing different than your last tours?
	No, it'll just be tour, new music.
	Tour, new music, yes, sir.
	Lots of fire.
	I've been.
	I went and saw George Strait and Chris Stapleton in Utah.
	That was awesome.
	Utah is so great, man.
	It's amazing.
	My brother lives right outside of Mount Zion Park.
	Well, he's got an awesome spot there.
	Yeah, we're like 30 minutes outside of Salt Lake.
	Yeah.
	And it's lovely.
	The whole state is astonishing.
	It's killer.
	And there's a sense of freedom.
	There's a sense of like, I want to do what I want to do.
	That's exactly why I went there.
	I lived in LA for like five years, and I was like, I can't do it.
	Like, I can't do it anymore.
	It's beautiful, but the people there, and that's not even LA people.
	It's, you know, like people who move there.
	And it's just always, I felt like this oppressive energy.
	It's always like, there's always something to do.
	There's always something someone wants from you.
	And I went and did a show.
	And I met beautiful people in LA.
	And I've also met a lot of fucking dickheads.
	But I did a show in Utah.
	And I was like, this place fucking rocks.
	And so a week later, we got the house.
	And that was it.
	And it was the best decision I've made.
	Yeah, some of my best shows that I've had recently were through Idaho and Utah.
	Idaho probably gets down.
	Bro, those.
	Cool.
	Dude, I didn't know they like G-U-N-S over there, dude.
	Oh, you didn't know?
	I didn't know.
	There's nothing else to do.
	I was like, who likes guns?
	Seven people just shot him in the ball.
	Fucking single-action core, fucking single-action army.
	Yeah.
	Cool.
	Noted?
	Yeah, man.
	Yeah.
	So that was pretty cool.
	So be funny.
	Something funny, funny, man.
	Oh, you tighten up.
	Your posture is fucking.
	Yeah.
	And so that was pretty amazing, man.
	It's going there.
	And it's such beautiful country out there.
	And I think a lot more people are like, what are we doing in these cities?
	What am I chasing?
	Yeah, man.
	I want to be alive.
	I want to feel like something important.
	Did you feel like as you got more famous, that part of you like changed or disappeared?
	Or because when did you start to get popular at?
	Or let's just say popular because fame is a weird word.
	Yeah.
	You know, what things happened to you?
	Did you notice anything?
	Did some of it feel bad?
	Yeah, man.
	I mean, I Migo's had a song called I'd Rather Be Rich Than Famous.
	It makes a lot of sense.
	It's just, especially whenever it's, you're coming like the whole music world so young, it's super easy to just be a fuck up kid, you know what I mean?
	And not know what the fuck is going on.
	And it was hard.
	And that's since then, I've moved to Utah.
	I got rid of my social media.
	I keep way more to myself.
	I don't really go out anymore.
	I just like, and, you know, for a long time, I was very sad.
	And I find myself now getting back into what is fun to me and what I love doing.
	Been a lot of riding, a lot of time in the fucking woods.
	I just got a really awesome piece of property where I can just sit and fish and be to myself.
	And I wondered for the longest time why I was so sad.
	And it was just because I wasn't able to do what I like to do in my current circumstance.
	And I think it's important for anyone who's doing anything to be able to get out and take some time for yourself.
	And for the longest time, I didn't do that.
	You know, it was just head down and go, go, go.
	But now taking this time to really just do what I like to do.
	And I have a daughter, I guess.
	She's cool.
	She's fine.
	So that helps.
	Yeah.
	Did you really mean that, what you're saying?
	Yeah.
	Absolutely, man.
	And I think it's important for everyone.
	I struggle.
	Like, I just keep feeling like I need to do more to prove.
	Like, I don't know what I'm trying to prove things to sometimes.
	Yes, sir.
	It's like there's this constant, like, I've had it since I think I was a kid.
	You know, like, I'm not enough.
	And I just, I don't know if it's, I'm not enough.
	That's not the feeling.
	The feeling is like, I need to keep, I need, what else can I do?
	What's the next?
	I just, I have, like, I have to do more.
	But it's like, what am I trying to appease?
	Am I trying, that's the thing I struggle with sometimes, you know?
	Sure.
	And I think in the end, later on, I've realized, I think, as an adult, it's just this endless feeling of like, oh, I'm not enough.
	I have to constantly prove myself to you.
	And if I proved myself to you yesterday, that's not enough.
	That's not enough.
	I have to prove myself again to you today.
	And I think it's just this, I don't know how that magnet started that keeps pulling that energy out of me.
	Well, I think people have the natural inclination to want to be great, you know?
	And it's like, even with music with me, I can only speak on my behalf.
	I can't speak on your world at all.
	But whenever I make a record, I'm already writing new songs.
	Like I'm like, I've already done these songs.
	I want to see what I can do next.
	I want to see what I can make next.
	You know what I mean?
	It's always like you want to create.
	And we get caught up in this kind of deal where it's just like, it's just, like I said, everything is so fucking fast.
	Yeah.
	Now it's.
	And like you said, I proved myself to you yesterday.
	Why do I got to prove myself to you today?
	And it's nothing is certain.
	And we just want to be great.
	I think humans inherently want to be great and be accepted.
	And let me ask you this.
	What do you like to do?
	What do you like to do when you're not working?
	You know, honestly, I like to go fishing, man.
	I like to talk to my brother.
	I like to think about my friends.
	I like to pray for my friends and people.
	Maybe you go be a minister, like a volunteer minister.
	I was thinking about signing up for the fire department.
	I agree.
	You're still getting people out of fire, but for the volunteer ministry, okay?
	But pulling people out of Hades and pulling people out of a fucking, somebody fucking, somebody set off a space heater in a Hampton Inn is a little bit different, okay?
	But I feel you.
	You understand what I feel?
	100%, brother.
	Praise God, baby.
	Yeah, one day I think I would like to end up in that or in some form of like, is there anything from my life that I can share that will help somebody not feel some of the tough parts that I felt?
	And yes, sir.
	Yeah, that's it.
	Your heart is bigger than your hat, dude.
	And I can tell that from the first moment I met you, I think we met at Losers the first time.
	Oh, yeah.
	We were just hanging out back with Ern.
	Yep.
	And Ern is the glue of this city.
	Oh, my God.
	Can we go ahead and say that?
	He knows everybody.
	It's amazing.
	He knows everybody.
	And he's so funny.
	Yeah.
	And he's so talented.
	Yes, sir.
	And I hope he feels how much people love him Because they do, absolutely.
	And I love that motherfucker too.
	More than life, brother.
	I love you, dude.
	So I have never, he's the funniest person I've ever seen.
	He's a whip, dude.
	He's a whip.
	It's insane.
	He's just, he's so fast.
	He's fast.
	I can't even believe it.
	Like, it's kind of like hanging with John Mayer.
	Like, whenever you meet John Mayer, it's like everything you say, he has a one-liner in response.
	And it's the coolest thing you've ever heard anyone say.
	Earns very much like that.
	He's going, going, going.
	Oh, John's magnificent, dude.
	So I went, I met John Mayer probably 17 years ago, right?
	And then seven years later, I saw him at the comedy store.
	When I met him, I was working as a tour manager for an artist named Josh Kelly, who also came out of Georgia.
	But anyway, he and I met John one night.
	And seven years later, I was at the comedy store and I saw John and I said, hey, man, I met you.
	And he goes, I met you at an apartment in New York City seven years ago.
	And he fucking knew.
	It's insane.
	And I was like, oh, you're a wizard.
	Yeah, he is.
	He is a wizard.
	It was crazy, man.
	And so, yeah, we went and saw him recently at the Grateful Dead and Co.
	How was that show?
	Dude, it was so special, man.
	It was so special.
	My brother's a huge Grateful Dead fan.
	And I love my brother so much.
	I can't.
	I don't even have the words for how much I love my brother.
	Yes, sir.
	And in between the shows, his assistant came out and said, hey, John wants to say hey to you guys.
	So we're walking back.
	My brother's a huge Grateful Dead fan.
	Like he's like bought like Jerry's like replica DNA off Reddit and shit.
	He's had some tough moments, but he's a great guy.
	And my brother's like looking at all the dressing rooms.
	Like shit you don't do.
	Like, you know, you're walking back.
	You don't fucking, you know, my brother's like looking at like the, you know, he's looking at like the coffee tray and this, what's going on?
	You know, he sees Bob Weirs dressing.
	He introduced himself to a security guard.
	You know, it's sweet.
	You know, it's cool.
	It was amazing.
	Yeah, it was awesome.
	And then we got to go in and talk to John.
	And I literally just sat there while they talked about Grateful Dead.
	Yeah.
	And that moment right there was the highlight of my life.
	Yeah.
	And I can tell you you love your brother, dude.
	Yeah.
	Like so much.
	Just basic.
	You sit there because to be 100% candid with you, I could not name one Grateful Dead song.
	Yeah.
	And for you to sit there and talk about the Grateful Dead.
	Oh, I love it.
	That's amazing.
	It meant so much to me.
	Because I just knew, and they're both, and my brother is very articulate and extremely smart, especially when it comes to like child development and stuff.
	And so, and I knew that in a weird way, his intellect and John's would be cool.
	And it was just nice.
	But it was nice of John to welcome us.
	Anyway, it was a great show.
	I'm kind of bragging there, but that was like a cool moment, you know?
	And the other day I was texting my brother and he's like, yeah, he's like, hey, you know, John, I like, it was cool that John just let us have a regular conversation with him.
	And I was like, yeah, it was really cool.
	He's a stud, man.
	Much like Ern.
	I get the same kind of deal.
	Oh, you do?
	Yeah.
	I get the same kind of deal.
	I think so.
	Yeah, Ern.
	He's a smart man.
	Ern is so good.
	I mean, he, yeah, it's crazy.
	He makes me laugh.
	I'm like, how do I laugh?
	I got to talk to him.
	Yeah.
	He's a killer.
	Yeah.
	He's a killer.
	And, you know, did he work on a new, is he on one of your new songs?
	Yeah, we did a song together.
	He wrote a bunch on the record and he's just like, dude, he's on top of it.
	I can't even believe it.
	I'm honored to work with that young man.
	And he's just a great heart.
	It was him and Chuck.
	Through them, I met everyone here.
	And it's a great spot right here, man.
	I just can't believe it.
	Yeah, what's the time in Nashville been like?
	So it's been, what, five or six months you've been here?
	Yes, sir.
	Yeah.
	Five or six months or maybe a little more, I think.
	Did you buy a house here?
	No, sir.
	I want one.
	It's just so damn expensive.
	It's pricey, huh?
	It is.
	It is for fancy house.
	Whatever, you know, if you get a new spot, I'll move in with you.
	I'll move in in the garage.
	Yeah, come on in.
	I'm pretty low-minded.
	I need some help.
	Yeah, exactly.
	No, please do it.
	I can't swing the Nashville deal.
	But I'm looking for spots.
	I'd like a spot out here because every time we come out here, we stay at the hotel or Airbnb, and the folks at the hotel are so sweet, and they take such great care of me.
	But I just need a little more room.
	So we started Airbnb in a little bit because we have the baby out and all that stuff.
	And then I was like, we'll get a spot.
	So we started looking and like stuff that I'm looking at.
	I'm like, Jesus Christ, it's pricey.
	It is wild.
	Yeah, it is wild.
	We looked at the same house.
	I remember talking about it.
	We did.
	You looked at it too, huh?
	I looked at it on the internet.
	Oh, you didn't go visit?
	I didn't go.
	I didn't go.
	I didn't went in person.
	I went three times.
	Yeah, I didn't go.
	It's so hard for me to get something that's fancy.
	You deserve it.
	Thanks, man.
	Well, all you need to do is start doing like those.
	You do the youth pastor stuff, but you do it like this big stadium deal, like the guy, what's the guy's name?
	Carl Lentz.
	Who's the, I don't want to be in an airplane with a bunch of demons, so I bought me a private jet.
	You know who I'm talking about?
	Yeah, bring that guy up.
	Yeah, that dude's awesome.
	And our friend's out of control.
	He's out of control.
	But no judgment here.
	Let's bring this fella up, Benny.
	I'm not a devout believer in Kenneth Copeland.
	I'll say that.
	Okay, and he knows who we're talking about, dude.
	Kenneth Copeland, that's what it is.
	I don't want to be.
	God gave me an airplane.
	Why you don't want to fly commercial?
	Why have you said that you won't fly commercial?
	You said that it's like getting into a tube with a business.
	Doesn't he look evil?
	Why do you think that's a good thing?
	He's got like the classic villain distributed.
	Chuck Schumer.
	Not the people.
	The main reason is because of the need.
	If I flew commercial, I'd have to stop 65% of what I'm doing.
	That's really the main.
	Isn't it true that you want to fly commercial so that you can fly in luxury?
	How much money did you pay for Tyler Perry's Gulfstream Jet, for example?
	Well, for example, that's really none of your business, but listen.
	Good question.
	Hey.
	Big slap back right there.
	You kind of caught me off guard here.
	Well, fuck.
	To catch your breath and And have a conversation.
	We don't want to catch you off guard.
	Really?
	You ran up to him under a shit.
	Hey, you listening to me?
	My wife thinks Inside Edition is...
	Yes.
	Maybe Rowan, too.
	Again, getting back to the comments.
	You said that you don't like to fly through the body because you don't want to get into a tube with a bunch of demons.
	Do you really believe that human beings are demons?
	No, I do not.
	And don't you ever say I did.
	It hurts.
	It hurts.
	We wrestle not with flesh and blood, but principalities and powers.
	Can you explain what you meant by that term then?
	Just to he's not from Utah.
	If he's from Utah, Louisiana, we're.
	Oh, he's from Newark, Texas.
	Oh, fuck, Texas.
	And that's fair.
	And that's where you grew up.
	Yeah, yeah, okay.
	He grew up in Texas.
	I mean, I guess.
	He's fine, I guess, now.
	He's from Lubbock.
	No shit.
	That's crazy.
	That's wild.
	Hey, neighbor.
	That's wild.
	Did you, yeah?
	What were some of your music you grew up listening to in Texas, man?
	Fuck.
	Or what was the music that kind of first influenced you?
	Like, for me, I had a lot.
	I mean, John Michael Montgomery to see you play with him the other night.
	So cool.
	Bro, we love listening to him.
	We loved listening to Clint Black.
	We loved listening to Garth Brooks.
	We loved listening to Lil Wayne.
	We loved listening to the hot boys.
	The hot boys.
	Yeah, buddy.
	Those are some of the musicians of like No Doubt, like shit like that.
	You know, Jewel.
	Everything.
	Yeah.
	Everything.
	That's like, like, I remember my dad had this, the big ass iPod that was like 100 or 360 gigs.
	You remember the big blocks?
	And I would steal it.
	I was like, hey, can I use your iPod tonight?
	And it was everything.
	It was like Megadeth, fucking the blueprint, fucking the Garth Brooks, my mom sounded.
	The feelings of the fucking housing, fucking Lane Steele.
	Fucking killer, dude.
	What is that one?
	I think it's the same song.
	But my wings have been so did I. I like that.
	Sorry.
	That could be also from the Muppets.
	Okay, my bad.
	But yeah, it's almost unrecognizable.
	No, it's just everything, man.
	And I grew up in a, like, Young Thug for me is my favorite lyricist and melody maker, like, of all fucking time.
	Like, I remember when he, like, the first song I heard was the, it was him and Pee Wee Longway.
	It's a song called Loaded.
	And I was like, what the fuck?
	These melodies, like, insane.
	Like, he goes to such crazy fucking places that, free young dog, by the way.
	It goes, he goes to such crazy fucking places where you, the natural mind, like my melody mind doesn't go.
	He like, I would go down one place and he would go like two octaves up.
	And I was like, what the fuck, dude?
	This is mine.
	And so fun to listen to.
	Like, so fucking cool.
	And like, a lot of it, like, growing up was in my early teens and everything was Thug and like Rocky and George Straight, fucking Hank Sr., Alan, Megadeth, Metallica, fucking Anthrax.
	Just fucking everything.
	Oh, yeah.
	And even a little dubstep.
	I don't listen to dubstep now, but I did.
	Like a little flux pavilion just to pepper it.
	Wow, bro.
	But dude, there's so much fucking cool shit going on.
	And that's the problem too.
	Like, I remember like SoundCloud just first started.
	And I was maybe one of the first artists to really like blow up strictly on SoundCloud.
	Really?
	I don't even know that.
	Soundcloud, I think it was like 2013 SoundCloud was going.
	And I think 20, I can't, dude, I can't remember anything.
	I have such a dory brain.
	But yeah.
	And it's so hard now, I feel like, for new artists to, because of the volume of music that's getting put out, which is a fucking amazing thing.
	Oh, 2007, I was way off.
	That's when it started.
	It was really popping.
	Right.
	Things that start.
	That means they open their doors.
	Yes, sir.
	Probably took five years to get it.
	Type in when did SoundCloud really start popping?
	2017.
	Like in 2017.
	Look at that.
	Chance the rapper, post Malone, Odd Future.
	Oh, you're on that list.
	Yeah, see, I'm on the list out of three.
	There you go.
	Isn't that cool?
	Yeah, super cool, man.
	But yeah, it's hard now, like, to get discovered, especially.
	Well, it might be, it's either easier or real hard because you can do something that really just tricks the algorithm and saying, like, people get, like, viral, you know, super viral moments.
	But songs don't have to be viral to be awesome.
	And we miss out, I feel, like, on so many like artists that never, you know, so many talented people that never get the algorithm going for them, but they're fucking killer.
	And that's like the hard part is the volume of stuff.
	And I, like, I'm a big advocate.
	Like the first recording software I got, I think making music should be as cheap as it possibly can.
	And you can get your ideas out.
	Like, I used a free recording software.
	I had a $200 guitar.
	I had a $100 mic.
	And I would sit in my room and fucking make these songs.
	I love that concept.
	But it's hard now because it's, it, like I said, it's so fast.
	And songs are viral for a couple days.
	And then, like, you, you don't hear much after that.
	You know what I mean?
	And that's like, or a train comes through and takes.
	But that's what people, people are like, let's make something that goes viral.
	I just like I want people to fucking express themselves the way that it is.
	And if you work super fucking hard and you go, like, I'm the luckiest dude in the world.
	I went viral.
	Like that, White Iverson went viral.
	And that was because of Fat Man Key and he's fucking amazing.
	But you also feel like you were sharing yourself honestly.
	Yes, sir.
	Absolutely.
	And that's like, and I think there's so many artists out there that I want to do something in the future where like Audacity, that free recording program.
	Oh, yeah.
	The most amazing thing of all.
	It's free.
	It's free.
	That's the only editor I know how to use it.
	Amazing.
	Just bonk in the middle.
	And that'll be up on Audacity.
	It's amazing.
	And it's free.
	And it has been free.
	Thank you, Audacity.
	I didn't even think about it.
	Dude, fuck yeah.
	Thank you, Audacity.
	Isn't that fucking cool?
	It really was cool.
	Yeah, I didn't even think about that.
	I never even thought to thank them because, yeah, I'd be up in the middle of the night, a podcast episode, something be wrong.
	Like, we got to fix it.
	Boom, I'll use Audacity, you know?
	Yeah, I think, you know, I think express trying to be real to yourself.
	What makes you fucking feel?
	What makes you hurt?
	Or what makes you want?
	What makes you angry or what makes you, you know, what makes you uncertain?
	You know, like if you can find a feeling and attach your art to it, I think that that, I just, I don't believe that we can't see authenticity when we see it.
	Yes, sir.
	I don't believe that.
	I know there's hooks and you can get hooked, you know, you can get hooked on the hooks, you know, but I feel like authenticity, you can never lose by just trying, you know?
	You're not making it just to make it.
	You're making it because you love it.
	Right.
	Well, Bernie, that's one thing Bernie Sanders said.
	I said, well, what would you say to a young politician who wants to be, you know, someone young who wants to affect culture the same way you did in the 70s when you decided to become a politician?
	He said, me?
	No, not you.
	Oh, that's what, that explains Elvis' question.
	You're talking about ghost Malone, dude.
	But no, no, no.
	He said, I said, Bernie, if you had to say something to a young person who was the same as you in 1970 or 1968, who wanted to affect change, right?
	Who really wanted to have a, you know, who believed that I'm a human that can have an effect on the world, right?
	He said, do it because of what your purpose is, not because you want to get elected.
	Like, you don't have to get elected anymore to serve your purpose.
	Yes, sir.
	Right.
	You can serve your purpose because of social media and because of the internet these days, just as much as if you got elected.
	If you were elected.
	Yes, sir.
	And that was pretty interesting to me.
	It was like, yeah, find the new road, you know?
	Like, just like even with SoundCloud, it's like, find, like, yeah, if you couldn't get a deal, if there wasn't a deal, somebody handing you a deal, that's like, find the new road.
	Find the SoundCloud, go independent.
	And it's such a cool thing to see like independent artists and fucking them doing all the shit by themselves, like printing the records, putting it up on DSPAs, you know, all this stuff.
	It's so cool.
	That's, that's why like, I think I was saying too, I want to give like down the road whenever, you know, there's more time and I'm not so selfish and self-focused.
	Well, and I got my family too, so I'm working hard for that.
	But it's okay.
	I feel you, man.
	It's like, you get going on your own dream and your own dream takes off.
	And then it's like, how quick do you feel like I need to start to turn around and figure out help?
	And when, yeah, and when can you help others?
	And that's like the most important thing for me is either you do it with music, help people, you know, through hard times or help them get through a tough week or whatever.
	But I want to make it bigger and help, you know, artists really get a fucking spot and showcase talent because there's so much that doesn't get, you know, like it's cool.
	I'm excited.
	You know, and I'm about 30 years old.
	I'm 29, but tomorrow, or not tomorrow, but next year I'll be 30. And I'm like, I don't have it in me anymore.
	You know, I'm figuring it out.
	I'm like, I'm like, my back hurts.
	You know, whenever your knees click whenever you stand up, yeah, man.
	Dude, I went to an audition one time and they're like, all right, do the part.
	And I started reading and I like pointed and you could hear it was a quiet room.
	Your elbow goes?
	You could hear my elbow click.
	It was like somebody loaded a shotgun.
	And you saw there was one cute girl in the room.
	She'd like immediately got her phone out.
	It was like, you could just.
	That was not that bad.
	It was bad.
	Everybody gave.
	Even I, you could see in my eyes.
	One of my eyes, I was like, I'm going home.
	We'll just let the other one work.
	You know, I cocked in earlier than he did.
	You could see fucking my, you could just see things change, you know.
	It is wild.
	But it is wild, yeah.
	But it is also wild.
	And also, you want to get to a place in your life when it comes to like giving back where you know what you want to give back to.
	Like, that's the craziest thing.
	It's like I've been in discussions with like about a year and a half with an attorney about starting a foundation.
	And like, well, what do you want your foundation to be?
	You can't just make a foundation and it's blind.
	Like the government, you have to make it very specific.
	And so there's all these certain things.
	And so you have to figure that out.
	And you don't want to just be blind.
	You want to do something you care about because otherwise then you're supporting something you don't even really care about and your passion's not going to be in it.
	Can I 10-1?
	Yeah.
	All right.
	Let me 10-1.
	You got a pee?
	Yes, sir.
	You can pee off the balcony if you want.
	That's not true.
	Yeah, it is, dude.
	Dude, I'm putting this Elmer Fudd hat on, dude.
	Brandless.
	That's bad.
	Hold on.
	I look like a referee at a freaking...
	That's not horrible.
	Why are you too hard on yourself?
	Dude, I'm so hard on myself.
	Why?
	Well, I don't know why.
	I think, man, this is a great question.
	Let me think about it real quick.
	And let me seriously think about it.
	Why am I so hard on myself?
	I think there's a constant feeling of like, I think you know, I think it comes from when I was a kid.
	I have to be enough for you to see me.
	So how do I make myself enough or okay where you'll see me?
	You know?
	Oh, I see you and you're a stud and I love you.
	You're a killer.
	Thanks.
	And there's so many people out there that think the same.
	The hat did suck, though.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	You're amazing.
	Thanks, dude.
	Yeah.
	No, not at all.
	Yeah, I don't know why.
	It's just so crazy that it doesn't get built into me, man.
	Thank you, dude.
	It's sweet of you to say.
	Come on.
	No, it's just sweet of you to say, man.
	Yeah, it's like, I hate that.
	I hate that I'm always having to like, you know, after a while, it gets, you know, thinking, do I look okay?
	Do I seem okay?
	Do I like, I just want to fuck it.
	I'm just tired of the fight, you know, and the fight is just against me.
	It's like the same thing you're saying.
	It's like, so I'm not getting in, I'm not getting into self-pity mode here.
	I'm just looking at it, you know?
	Yes, sir.
	I want people to know that.
	Sometimes we can get into self-pity.
	I got to be careful there.
	Yes, sir.
	I don't want to get into self-pity, but it's like, yeah, why is that?
	But even thinking about it like this is kind of helpful, you know?
	So thanks, man.
	No, thank you, Theo.
	And dude, the shit that you do and how many lives you brighten every day just by being your fucking self and doing this show.
	And it helps so many people.
	It's fucking bitching, to put it mildly.
	Yeah.
	It's bitching, dude.
	You're such a bitching dude.
	You're such a bitching dude.
	It seems almost a little femme, okay?
	No, yeah.
	It is.
	That's okay.
	High femme.
	High film.
	Yeah, it's high femme.
	Thanks, dude.
	Thanks, bro.
	Thank you, man.
	Yeah, I wish I could think, you know, I think it was just so hard when I was a kid.
	It was so hard to feel highly of myself, you know?
	It was like I just like, I don't know.
	I felt like I just wasn't worth a lot, you know.
	Theo Von.
	No shade, bro.
	Quit it, brother.
	Sorry.
	No cap.
	Quit it.
	You son of a bitch.
	Thanks, bro.
	I'm not trying to be weird.
	No, you're not being weird.
	I'm not flirting with you.
	You don't feel like that, dude.
	You are cute.
	Take the hat off.
	Hold on, dude.
	Look, I kissed your brother.
	This is where Theo Von used to kiss his mama.
	No, I don't know.
	Yeah, just, I don't know.
	Sometimes that old shit fucking comes up, you know?
	No, absolutely.
	And I want to respect it because that's the old kid's feelings.
	But also, yeah, I want to let that kid know the same things you say that, like, you know, I'm a deservant person and that I'm a good person and that it's okay.
	You are.
	Like, that's why I asked earlier.
	Like, I get the idea.
	I can only, you know, we've met times before, but today I feel like take some time to do fucking Theo shit.
	Dude, take that.
	You deserve it.
	More than, more than you know, I think.
	And that's like a really fucking cool thing.
	You are such a good person.
	And I'm just honored to know you.
	And you fucking kick ass, dude.
	You too, man.
	You kick ass, dude.
	Thanks for talking to me about that stuff.
	I know it's not always easy to talk about.
	And I didn't mean to push it on you.
	No, I don't feel like you did, man.
	It's something a lot of the listeners of this show think about a lot.
	We talk about that stuff a lot.
	It's like, yeah, how we feel, our relationship to ourselves, that kind of shit.
	It's important.
	It is important.
	And it gets overlooked.
	Yeah, it gets, I mean, I can't believe it's not a class in school.
	Like, hey, how do you feel about yourself?
	Like, fuck, dude.
	I'd have wrote 70 essays on that.
	Yeah, it's easy.
	Oh, that's an F?
	Yeah, fucking right.
	Yeah, right.
	This is, you don't know, motherfucker.
	Yeah.
	It's crazy that there's not a world of a little bit more a world of emotional intelligence.
	Yes, sir.
	Like when we grow up.
	Yes, sir.
	Because it would help people so much.
	Absolutely.
	But thanks, bro.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Yeah.
	And yeah, like I feel, yeah, most of the time I feel great, you know, and dude, the past few years have just been so good.
	It's like going through like so much therapy and I've done ayahuasca treatments and I've done, I've been in 12-step recovery like 95% of the last 10 years.
	And so, you know, all of that whole universe has been great.
	And you're fucking killing it, dude.
	Yeah, look, dude, you're here today.
	I made it.
	You got me, dude.
	You got me and Bernie.
	Dude, could I ask for two more sweethearts?
	If I had a Valentine's when I was a kid, I would have picked a woman, but instead, I got you and Bernie.
	And I'll take it, bro.
	Well, double Valentine's very progressive.
	Yeah.
	Polyamorous Valentine.
	Hey, yeah.
	Good band name, bro.
	Fucking good band name.
	It doesn't even, yeah, polyamorous Valentine.
	Yeah, that's cool.
	Dude, do you ever, have you seen all the Halloween costumes of you?
	Have you ever seen them?
	You do?
	A cool story about Halloween.
	I don't know if I've told this before.
	Yeah, tell it, man.
	We were on Bourbon Street in the Big Easy.
	Oh, yeah, New Orleans, man.
	I'm from Covington, Louisiana, so close.
	And I love it there, by the way.
	It's like the dopest place.
	But we went on Halloween.
	Oh, it's a great place to go missing.
	Oh, it's the best.
	We went on Halloween and people thought I was a costume and didn't get stopped once.
	They were like, sick costume, dude.
	I'm like, digs, man.
	It didn't get stopped once.
	I know I love this.
	Like, dude, it's so cool to see.
	I don't know why babies dress up as me so much.
	I don't know why my music is so big to the three and under demographic.
	Is that true?
	It is.
	Look at all these babies.
	Hey, pull up post Malone babies.
	Oh my God.
	And that one has a cigarette.
	Bring up post Malone babies, dude.
	Costume.
	I'm trying, dude.
	Well, see, look, baby.
	Oh, baby costume.
	Hey, Theo.
	Hold on.
	Zoom.
	Coming around.
	Hold on.
	Bring this up, dude.
	This kid looks like somebody Gypsy Rose would date.
	Or what's that lady's name, Gypsy?
	Gypsy Rose.
	Is her name Gypsy Rose?
	Who's that?
	that looks like somebody Gypsy Rose is probably going to leave prison for Gypsy Rose Blanchard, beautiful lady.
	What'd she do?
	From Louisiana.
	Well, who knows what she did?
	But she is okay with meeting men outside of prison.
	Pull back.
	Go to the babies.
	Oh, my God.
	Who the fuck?
	Pull that back up, dude.
	The baby would look normal.
	I'm not convinced those aren't prosthetic feet.
	Bro, no joke.
	I'm not going to give you a joke.
	And this is no shade.
	This looks like Travis Tritt's son.
	Bring up Kristen Tritt.
	Oh, my God, dude.
	He's going to kill me for this, dude.
	Tristan, I love you and your sister and your father.
	Bring up Kristen Tritt.
	Okay.
	I don't see it.
	But hold on.
	No.
	Put it together for me right now.
	You don't see it?
	Bro, you are an artist?
	And you don't see it?
	I mean, kissing your mother.
	You don't see it, white boy.
	It is what it is.
	That's the worst picture.
	Get him.
	Come on.
	So what do you want to make?
	What do you want?
	Of Tristan Trit, beautiful young man, Travis Tritz's son, talented musician.
	We need long hair.
	Just do your best real quick and put it together.
	We'll put it together then and we'll come back to it, dude.
	What is that one right there?
	Wait, go back to that real quick, sir.
	Yeah, click on that.
	Go down.
	What is that third image?
	What is that?
	What does that say?
	Why do you draw on your eye?
	The concept gives me nightmares.
	Congratulations.
	Congratulations.
	What does that mean?
	I don't know.
	It looks very Vincent van.
	That's actually on her face.
	That's like her eye right there.
	No, it is not.
	Wait, that's Photoshop.
	That's her eyelash and that's her eyebrow.
	That's Photoshop.
	Oh, it's a drawing.
	It's makeup.
	That's cool.
	That's cool.
	Interesting placement.
	Dude, I couldn't even figure that out.
	That's dark magic.
	I thought it was.
	Yeah, I thought it was, that's cool.
	Dude, that's, yeah, that's why I don't drive into the city.
	That's you stepping out.
	Who's on the other eye?
	Oh, it's dark magic, huh?
	Who's on the other eye?
	Probably Dennis Rodman.
	Cool.
	Hold on.
	The other.
	Hold on.
	The other post Malone.
	Oh, it comes out of the beard.
	Yeah, it's your beard.
	All right, I get it.
	I understand that.
	What are the different Malones I've seen?
	I've seen Coast Malone.
	Have you ever seen that one?
	No, sir.
	Is it like a Sishore?
	It's like, yeah, see if you see Coast Malone.
	Let's not avoid the Theo Vaughan baby Halloween costumes.
	That's good.
	That's apocalyptic almost.
	Coast Malone is good.
	Hit the one with the mountains right there on the fourth one.
	That's very similar.
	I don't see why not.
	Look, I agree.
	It's very similar.
	Well, you just got to get enough land, then you could carve it yourself.
	Oh, Dermot Kennedy's coming on, dude.
	He'd love to do it, dude.
	He's an Irish slot.
	Yeah, we had Coast Malone.
	What else did we have?
	We had...
	Ghost Malone is classic.
	Goast classic.
	Toast Malone.
	This one's good.
	Toast Malone is good.
	I like the fourth one.
	Yeah, pull up the fourth one right there.
	Yeah, that's my favorite.
	That is enjoying the roast Malone.
	It's cursed.
	That's just a white guy at a chevron.
	Okay, pull up one more.
	Bring up.
	What else do we have?
	Roast Malone.
	Bring up Roast Malone.
	Roast Malone's good.
	Roast Malone is good.
	Hard road roast is good.
	Imagine selling.
	It's like the Jesus on a cracker or whatever.
	That's good for some money.
	Most Malone.
	That's terrifying.
	You don't want to cut into your Christmas ham and fucking.
	Most Malone is good.
	What's that?
	It's just a bitch for a jelly roll.
	Sorry.
	And that's an old joke.
	And if I go to hell for that, that's on me.
	And it's a cheap joke, jelly roll.
	And I will say that.
	What a low blow, you cocksuck.
	It is a low blow.
	But I'll say that.
	It's a low blow to a high guy.
	And I believe that I can apologize to him.
	He's the best.
	Dude, those are the most Malones I've ever seen.
	That's the most Malone.
	That's the most Malones.
	Is there something when you think about your career?
	You've had a storied career.
	Sure.
	And thank you for it, man.
	Thank you for just taking us like, you know, you feel like a concierge that takes us through different universes.
	And I appreciate that, man.
	It's the same thing to say.
	Yeah.
	Well, it's important because a lot of artists say it's like their wheelhouse is, it's not limited, but it's like, it's not as multifaceted, you know?
	Yes, sir.
	And I appreciate that because people are multifaceted.
	Absolutely.
	You know, there's a lot to people.
	And yeah, it's just good to see that.
	It's good to see you share like vibrant sides, thoughtful sides, introspective sides, like angry sides, vibey sides.
	It's just cool to see you share the different sides, man.
	You know, I think that's the new wave of what a lot of people want to see about artists.
	Yes, sir.
	Because it's not that you love the music as much anymore.
	For me anyway, maybe.
	And I'm speaking for myself.
	Sure.
	You like the artist.
	Sure.
	And I think that that says a lot.
	For me, it's the perfect marriage of those two.
	I can't tell you how many times I've seen someone and I'm like, that dude.
	Well, this is a bad example.
	Christoph Waltz.
	Right?
	One of the greatest actors of all time.
	Is this for walking?
	Christoph Waltz.
	Sorry.
	Bless German.
	Yeah, pull him up.
	You'll know him if you see him.
	I believe in him.
	I just say that.
	Krustiff.
	Krustiff Waltz.
	Crazy paper airplane throw.
	I like the Google searches.
	People don't need to finish school to work here.
	Christoph Waltz.
	Oh, Christoph Waltz, yeah.
	Beautiful guy.
	You know him.
	He was in Django.
	He was in Inglorious Bastards.
	Beautiful guy.
	But even if he wasn't one of the best actors of all time, he seems so fucking cool.
	He seems like a great dude.
	He's got a great smile and a nice German accent kind of up here.
	And I like, he's just so trill.
	I haven't said trill and I don't throw that term around loosely.
	No one said it in a decade ago.
	Okay, seems super trill and boss.
	Zom.
	Oh, breaking up a bottle of trill is like breaking up a fine wine.
	Yeah, I'd be like, well, hold on.
	Post a 2010 trill.
	Somebody called Bieber, dude.
	We're having a night.
	Being who you are and being kind to people and just doing your best to be kind to people is the kind of vibe I get from him and the vibe I get from you.
	You could be shit, but you're going to win because you are a kind, kind person.
	I guess that's what I'm saying.
	I don't know how Christoph Waltz got brought in, but I love you, Christoph Waltz.
	Amen.
	And I love you.
	What's that?
	I love you, Theova.
	Oh, thanks, bro.
	I appreciate it.
	I love you too, man.
	I'm just going to get the me too on that one.
	I love cake.
	I've enjoyed listening to your music over the years.
	I've enjoyed seeing you being like, you know, I feel like when I see you, sometimes you're a reflection of the better parts of myself and others.
	And so I see you and it reminds me to smile about where I'm at.
	And I think that's a nice thing.
	And there's a lot of people that do that.
	But you are one of the people in the limelight that do that.
	And yeah, I've loved listening to the songs I've heard on your new album so far.
	The ones with Morgan, Luke Combs, Laney, Blake Shelton.
	Yes, sir.
	And I think there's only four I've listened to so far.
	But I'm looking forward to listening to more of them.
	It's out now.
	Fuck yeah.
	Yeah.
	There's a bonus track out now.
	Is there?
	That's what I heard.
	And if there isn't, we'll take that out.
	But Post Malone, thank you so much, man.
	Thanks for spending time with me.
	And thank you for spending time with humanity.
	I think it's important that we have people like you in the world.
	Well, thank you for having me on.
	And I'm so honored to be here.
	And everyone has been so kind to me.
	And you're the shit.
	And thank you.
	Thanks so much, bro.
	I love you.
	Thank you, bro.
	I love you too.
	And I love you too.
	And just keep being yourself.
	Keep being awesome.
	And don't be a dick.
	I love you.
	Have a great night.
	Be good to yourselves, baby gang.
	Now, I'm just floating on the breeze.
	And I feel I'm falling like these leaves.
	I'm a sleep cornerstone.
	Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this piece of my life found.
	I can feel it in my bones.

▲