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Jan. 29, 2019 - Tim Pool Daily Show
12:14
The MeToo BACKFIRE Is Only Getting Worse For Women

The MeToo BACKFIRE Is Only Getting Worse For Women. Once again the narrative emerges that the feminist movement against awful men has resulted in fewer male leaders wanting to mentor women.This time in Davos at the world economic forum we see many men express concerns over working with women due to false accusations. While many women and feminists believe the criticism of the social justice movement is wrong they fail to realize that social norms between men and women are very very different. Support the show (http://timcast.com/donate) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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For all the good that the MeToo movement has done getting rid of some of these really awful people who are abusing women, we do see some negative consequences.
There have been innocent people who have been smeared, and there have been opportunists who have jumped on the MeToo bandwagon just to get attention, to build their social following, and thus you hear stories about people like Aziz Ansari who didn't really do anything wrong but was accused of impropriety.
We're now seeing an escalation of one of the massive backfires of the MeToo movement, men who don't want to mentor women.
A story in the New York Times talks about how in Davos, Switzerland, at the World Economic Forum, there are men expressing fear over mentoring women or being alone with them.
And this is something we heard about quite a while ago.
There was a survey done by LeanIn, which shows half of male managers are concerned about mentoring females.
Now, many women are pushing back, saying any man who doesn't know how to not assault women shouldn't be a manager in the first place.
But they miss some key aspects of what is actually going on.
So today, let's take a look at the story from the New York Times and some of the rebuttals from many people who have addressed the issue.
But before we get started, make sure to follow me at minds.com slash timcast to follow my work.
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The narrative is re-emerging.
This time, the New York Times.
Another side of Me Too.
Male managers fearful of mentoring women.
This isn't the first time we've heard this, but this story is only from a few days ago.
In Davos, Switzerland, men attending the annual meeting of the World Economic Forum this year were worried about a lot of things.
A global economic slowdown, threats to cybersecurity, populism, war, and several acknowledged at the meeting this past week mentoring women in the MeToo era.
Quote, I now think twice about spending one-on-one time with young female colleague, said one American finance executive, speaking on the condition of anonymity because the issue is just too sensitive.
Me too, said another man in the conversation.
The Me Too movement, which burst into the spotlight in the fall of 2017, bringing down powerful figures in Hollywood, the media, politics, sports, and more, continues to reverberate 15 months later.
It has empowered women to speak up about harassment in the workplace and forced companies to take the issue more seriously.
More than 200 prominent men have lost their jobs, and nearly half of them were succeeded by women.
I think we can all agree that the guys who are abusing women, who are known to be conducting this behavior, who are getting away with it, who are now outed, this is a really, really good thing.
But we do know that some people are really concerned about being falsely accused, and there have been some people falsely accused.
As the old saying goes, it's better that ten guilty persons escape than one innocent person suffer.
And because of this, you're going to see some people who just don't want to, they don't want to buy that lottery ticket.
The way I explain it to people is, if you could buy a lottery ticket right now, and if you won, you would destroy your career.
Would you buy it?
People are going to say, no, why would I do that?
There's no reason to stick your neck out and even engage with women in the workplace if there is a one in a million chance.
Now, I think it is really silly for the most part, but I can empathize with why some people may be concerned.
But let's read on.
The New York Times says, In one unintended consequence, executives and analysts say, companies seeking to minimize the risk of sexual harassment or misconduct appear to be simply minimizing contact between female employees and senior male executives, effectively depriving the women of valuable mentorship and exposure.
Quote, Basically, Me Too has become a risk management issue for men, said Laura Listwood, secretary general of the Council of Women World Leaders, an organization for former and current female political leaders.
It's a problem many have acknowledged.
Last February, two online surveys by Lean In and SurveyMonkey on the effects of Me Too in the workplace found that almost half of male managers were uncomfortable engaging in one or more common work activities with women, such as working one-on-one or socializing.
One in six male managers was uncomfortable mentoring a female colleague, according to the studies, which together surveyed nearly 9,000 adults employed in the United States.
Pat Milligan, who leads research on female leadership at the consulting firm Mercer and advises multinational companies on gender and diversity issues, said many of her clients had voiced concerns over saying or doing the wrong thing since Me Too drew broad international attention.
A number of men have told me that they will avoid going to dinner with a female mentee or that they're concerned about deploying a woman solo on-site with a male, Ms.
Milligan said.
People are concerned and have questions.
If we allow this to happen, it will set us back decades, Ms.
Milligan said.
Women have to be sponsored by leaders, and leaders are still mostly men.
Gender fatigue, Ms.
Milligan said, noting that the Me Too movement had come after an intense decade of raising awareness on gender imbalances.
Quote, The business case for women had been made, Ms.
Milligan said.
We were rocking it, and then Me Too happened.
One challenge is to assess the risk of sexual harassment in a company, and to identify men who make women uncomfortable, or worse, harass them.
Traditional tools like employee surveys are not effective, said Ms.
Milligan, who recommends technological tools that allow for real-time and anonymous chats.
Once companies have identified those who make women uncomfortable, they have to assess whether the men are clueless, creepy, or criminal, Ms.
Milligan said.
If you think they are clueless, you can coach them.
Clueless can become creepy very quickly if you don't address it.
If they are creepy, you have to act.
Shelley Zalas of The Female Quotient, a company dedicated to achieving workplace equality, spoke of a climate of microsensitivity.
I tell women, before you take offense, make men aware that you are uncomfortable as it may not be intentional, she said.
Women and men must work together to write a new script for what's okay in the workplace so we all feel safe.
Now many women have tweeted criticism of this story or of the general concept.
Monica Hess is a columnist for the Washington Post and she wrote, This article implies that men are afraid to mentor women because Me Too has made them fear being alone with a female underling.
This is BS.
I've been mentored by many great men and none of it involved shadowy private alone time mentoring sessions.
They've sought out my opinions in meetings and given me credit for ideas.
They've insisted my byline go first on stories where we've collaborated.
They've put my name in for opportunities that I would have been too self-effacing to suggest myself.
They've written glowing letters of recommendation and encouraged me to move on when I've outgrown jobs.
They've scheduled group lunches where everyone benefits.
If you are afraid to mentor women, Your definition of mentoring needs to be vastly, vastly expanded.
There's a lot of other takes on this story, but what I find interesting about her take is that although it's critical of men who are concerned about mentoring women, she actually points out that in her experience most men have been good to her.
So if her experience has been overwhelmingly positive, well of course she'll take the approach that this story is utter nonsense.
But there are a lot of men who are concerned, and The Spectator brings up a really good point as to why.
In a story from yesterday, seemingly in response to the story from the New York Times, Me Too has hurt women in the workplace.
Daniela Greenbaum writes, There are two large problems, both of which play a role in contributing to this new workplace reality.
The first is that, unwittingly or not, Me Too has placed sexual assault and sexual harassment on the same platform.
Both are wrong.
And women should never be subject to either, whether in the workplace or anywhere else.
But anyone who has experienced sexual assault, or even has a friend or colleague who has experienced sexual assault, can attest to the fact that there is a world of difference between harassment and assault.
The second problem is that the movement has championed this notion that society must believe all women.
The issue here is that America's justice system treats the accused as innocent until proven guilty, yet society has come to treat accusations as if they were fact.
That gives men the impression that with a single tweet, A single sentence, a single comment, we are able to destroy their lives.
Some women I know cherish that sense of power.
They argue that since men are physically stronger, and with centuries of history in which women were oppressed and not treated as equals, it's good to instill a little fear in the other sex.
I don't believe they anticipated the extent to which fear is a highly motivating factor.
This time, it has motivated men to mentor fewer women.
How that's a victory for my fellow females, I don't have a clue.
Daniela brings up a really great point.
If the idea is believe all women, then in this societal function, you are not innocent until proven guilty.
You are guilty, period, if a woman just says so.
Now, in response to this kind of criticism, there's been a lot of women who say, yes, but false accusations are extremely rare.
They don't happen.
But they do happen enough.
And that's going to freak people out, whether you want to accept it or not.
A while ago, we heard about something called the Shitty Men in Media List, where women anonymously made accusations against men.
And in some instances, men came out and said these are false accusations, but it didn't matter.
Their lives had been damaged because some women anonymously on the internet accused them.
This story from October of last year.
A writer named on the Shitty Media Men list is suing its creator.
Stephen Elliott, claiming defamation, seeks $1.5 million and plans to identify anonymous women who alleged sexual misconduct.
Elliot has aligned himself with the attorney Andrew Miltonberg, a lawyer who specializes in fighting sexual assault claims and who has raised concern over Title IX protections.
Miltonberg made a name for himself representing hundreds of male college students accused of assault, challenging what he has told reporters is a system that is unfair to men.
The story is a few months old, but I think you can see why many men are going to react this way.
It may be that instances like the shitty media men list is extremely rare and men have nothing to worry about.
But this story got a lot of attention.
It was a media story, so female writers and personalities were propagating it, and if people hear about it, well, the squeaky wheel gets the grease.
I assure you, there are going to be very powerful, high-powered, and successful men who are going to say, look, I do not want to end up in one of these situations, so don't bother sending that email, don't bother sending that message, and don't go into private meetings with women, because it could only take one word or one miscommunication.
Think about it this way.
There's a lot of women who say, just don't harass women.
Sure.
But in today's day and age, people are overly sensitive.
And what if a guy does something that is normal male behavior that women don't like?
I'll give you an example.
If a man says to another man, you look stunning.
That's an incredible suit.
Where'd you get it?
The guy's gonna be like, oh, my tailor is so-and-so over on Fifth Avenue.
That's totally fine and acceptable in almost every circumstance.
But if a man says to a woman, whoa, you look stunning, that suit is incredible, ooh, where did you get that made?
She might take that a different way and say, why is this man commenting on my appearance?
There are different societal expectations, and a lot of men who might act one way in the workplace for everybody could be seen as creepy.
Or another example.
Imagine if a guy met another guy and grabbed his shoulder while talking to him about a story.
Guys do that kind of thing fairly often.
Making physical contact is not typically a sexual thing.
But imagine if a male colleague was mentoring a woman and he put his hand on his shoulder.
She might be like, why is this guy touching me?
Men and women have different expectations because they're different.
And it's because of simple things like that, you're gonna find a lot of guys who are gonna say, listen, I can pat my buddy on the back with no problems.
I cannot touch this woman.
There are different standards that are being applied.
And then you're going to find that guys can't treat women the same way they treat male mentees or colleagues.
Thus, regardless of whether or not men want to mentor women or they don't, there are different behaviors they have to apply and they don't know all the rules.
All that means is guys are gonna say, listen, I don't know what is or isn't acceptable.
It's not about harassment.
It's about the fact that you can put your arm around your buddy and give him, you know, fake little weak taps to the gut as a joke, or you can give him a noogie, and guys are typically okay with that.
Not always, I mean, you probably shouldn't go overboard with making physical contact with people you don't know, but you can do that with a good friend, and if you know the boundaries of what you and your buddies are, you know, comfortable doing, it's fine.
But you're probably not gonna be able to do that to a woman.
Plain and simple.
So let me know what you think in the comments below.
We'll keep the conversation going.
Do you think my point makes sense?
Because I think what I'm trying to say is, no matter what you do, no matter where you are, there are different standards of behavior between men and women.
And for a man who's worked in an industry that's dominated by men for decades, he's not going to know how to act with women.
Because he can act in certain ways with men, he can't with women.
So it's not an issue of just not harassing women.
But maybe I'm wrong.
You comment, let me know what you think.
We'll keep the conversation going.
You can follow me at minds.com slash TimCast for more commentary and more content.
I'm trying to get away from Twitter because it's just a very awful platform, plain and simple.
And I'll have more videos on my second channel, youtube.com slash TimCastNews, starting at 6pm.
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