True Anon Truth Feed - [PREVIEW] Episode 305: Bloodless Hype Machines Aired: 2023-07-13 Duration: 04:57 === Sweaty In The Swamp (03:36) === [00:00:00] It is hot. [00:00:01] It is hot in this studio. [00:00:03] Oh my gosh. [00:00:03] There's nothing else we can really say in this. [00:00:05] There's nothing else to say. [00:00:06] We are so sweaty. [00:00:08] I am. [00:00:09] So, you know, pores? [00:00:10] I don't have that in any way. [00:00:12] You don't. [00:00:12] And actually, you know what? [00:00:14] I heard in the wild a woman say to Liz yesterday, you have no pores. [00:00:19] Which is crazy because I definitely. [00:00:21] You took that as a compliment. [00:00:22] Absolutely. [00:00:23] You were like thrilled she said it. [00:00:25] And I don't know. [00:00:26] If someone told me I had no pores, I would be freaking out. [00:00:30] Oh, my God. [00:00:30] I have no pores. [00:00:32] Oh, my God. [00:00:33] So, of course, I was driven mad by jealousy of Liz, as I often am. [00:00:37] And this morning, I coated my entire body in one of the most toxic antiperspirants that I could find at Target. [00:00:45] I also chemically isolated aspartamy or whatever they have in Diet Coke, and I sort of spread that around myself in a gelatinous, kind of what you would call an anti-lube, because it really slowed me down. [00:00:56] And now I'm sweating on the inside. [00:00:58] And welcome to the wettest episode of Truanon ever. [00:01:23] Hello, everyone. [00:01:25] Hello. [00:01:25] Hello. [00:01:25] Welcome to the swamp. [00:01:27] Swamp thing. [00:01:29] We're swamping it up. [00:01:30] It's getting swampy. [00:01:32] That was Liz's son. [00:01:33] I thought I heard you try a southern accent. [00:01:34] I wasn't doing southern. [00:01:35] I was doing swamp. [00:01:37] That's a okay. [00:01:38] Cajun. [00:01:39] Yeah. [00:01:39] No, not Cajun, just swamp. [00:01:41] It would be great if we had a Cajun. [00:01:43] Food? [00:01:43] No, it's like instead of you. [00:01:46] Oh. [00:01:46] Like, we just had a Cajun there. [00:01:48] That's mean. [00:01:48] I was at. [00:01:49] Well, no, wait, you know what? [00:01:50] Not instead of you. [00:01:51] I wish we had a Cajun to educate. [00:01:53] I wish we could take one under our wing. [00:01:56] What? [00:01:57] Yeah. [00:01:57] Kind of like the swamps have eyes. [00:01:59] I think they're doing all right. [00:02:01] Hello, everyone. [00:02:01] Hello. [00:02:02] I'm Liz. [00:02:02] My name, of course, is the great Crawdaddy himself. [00:02:07] Who was that one guy? [00:02:08] He's giving Crawdaddy. [00:02:10] Not Buster Poindexter. [00:02:11] He was like a different guy that was like that, who was like a kind of like Bossa Nova New Orleans guy, wore wide-brimmed hats and danced around a lot. [00:02:22] I'm that guy, Bryce Belden. [00:02:23] We're, of course, joined by one of the number one steel plan, Pan Pan Plan, whatever you pronounce it, players in America, Young Chopsky, the producer of this podcast, which is called True Anon. [00:02:34] Hello. [00:02:35] You know, I could see you with like a wide-brim hat and big swampy trousers. [00:02:39] Really? [00:02:40] Yeah. [00:02:40] You think, I feel like I would need some bulk, like fat. [00:02:44] With the bare feet and the rolled hem, you're kind of giving it right now. [00:02:47] Yeah, I don't have. [00:02:48] I moved to get you some suspenders. [00:02:51] New York, New York, sit there. [00:02:53] Yeah. [00:02:53] The country, of course, against my will, but really against my better nature because all of my clothes were for California. [00:03:00] And now I had to move out here and I cannot wear. [00:03:03] Like, I wear a lot of rhinestones. [00:03:05] I wear a lot of long-sleeve rhinestone t-shirts. [00:03:08] Yeah, and the unitards. [00:03:09] And the unitard. [00:03:10] Yeah, and I wear a unitard. [00:03:12] That's what. [00:03:13] Okay, I thought you had been insulting me this whole time. [00:03:15] That's what this is called? [00:03:17] Anyways, you know, here I gotta like wear it. [00:03:19] It's like, I gotta dress for the hot country. [00:03:22] And like, I have to wear like, I have to like wear more loose-fitting pants because it's so hot. [00:03:26] Yeah, you gotta get breezy. [00:03:27] And my freaky shit is moist. [00:03:28] Ew. [00:03:29] What? [00:03:29] My freaky shit is moist. [00:03:31] Everyone, hello. [00:03:32] We've got a whole ass episode for you today. === Why We Left California (01:20) === [00:03:36] We got a big episode. [00:03:36] How long do you think this is? [00:03:41] We got 90 minutes. [00:03:42] Corsica, 90-minute or any. [00:03:44] This is like if a movie was made before 2005. [00:03:47] There were reasonable lengths of time. [00:03:49] Hey, this is like a movie. [00:03:52] My life, a movie. [00:03:53] My podcast is the length of one. [00:03:55] Oh, my God. [00:03:56] But we have with us, who do we have, Liz? [00:03:58] Douglas Rushkoff, our old buddy. [00:04:01] You know what? [00:04:03] I got to tell you, I'm always thrilled when like a, like a, this maybe sounds pathetic, actually, but when like a smart guy is like, I like the show. [00:04:14] I know, it's crazy. [00:04:15] I'm like, that's fucking insane. [00:04:17] I'm like, are you listening to the red show? [00:04:20] We were talking about it earlier. [00:04:21] I'm like, that's crazy. [00:04:22] You like this? [00:04:23] Yeah. [00:04:23] That makes me feel. [00:04:25] I mean, I say some crazy ass shit. [00:04:27] I'm. [00:04:28] I got my IQ done. [00:04:32] Liz, I went to this font to get my. [00:04:35] It is extraordinary. [00:04:39] Like, the lady gasped. [00:04:41] She dropped the clipboard and she's like, well, imagine, and I asked her, what does that mean? [00:04:46] She has, imagine where my clipboard was in my hands was like 100 IQ. [00:04:50] Yours IQ is the equivalent of where it is now. [00:04:53] And then she pointed to the ditch that it fell in because it was an outdoor clinic. [00:04:56] Oh, well, she's not very nice.