True Anon Truth Feed - [PREVIEW] Episode 304: Scando-nistas
Aired: 2023-07-06
Duration: 04:57


=== Brace's Reality Show Confession (03:29) ===

[00:00:00]  Prior to today's episode, Brace, what was your favorite reality show?
[00:00:07]  My experience with the genre is, as you know, fairly limited.
[00:00:13]  I've been exposed to Road Rules and the whatever one Puck was on when I was in the Real World.
[00:00:20]  And then we did the Real Housewives episode.
[00:00:22]  But no, but there's got to be something in between that.
[00:00:26]  I say this with every ounce of honesty available in my being, tapping and depleting all of my resources.
[00:00:32]  No.
[00:00:33]  I don't think I watched a single episode, even at someone else's house or anything.
[00:00:39]  Really?
[00:00:40]  And this isn't.
[00:00:41]  Survivor.
[00:00:41]  No, never.
[00:00:42]  American Idol.
[00:00:43]  Nope.
[00:00:43]  The Bachelor.
[00:00:44]  Never.
[00:00:45]  The Hills.
[00:00:46]  I didn't.
[00:00:47]  I thought that was an OC style scripted television show until just now.
[00:00:51]  It was.
[00:00:51]  Yeah, no, never.
[00:00:53]  But I will say, if you wanted.
[00:00:56]  No, I didn't.
[00:00:56]  I lived it.
[00:00:57]  I lived it.
[00:00:58]  I was out there living it.
[00:00:59]  You lived it?
[00:01:00]  And guess what?
[00:01:01]  You're fired.
[00:01:10]  However, due to obscure regulations in the great podcast Concordat of 1798,
[00:01:32]  women cannot fire male co-hosts from podcasts unless a producer-type situation.
[00:01:41]  which we'll get to later in this episode occurs.
[00:01:46]  Hello, everyone.
[00:01:48]  I'm Liz.
[00:01:50]  My name is Brace Van Der Pump.
[00:01:53]  And of course, we have with us my trusty young companion.
[00:01:58]  Actually, you know what?
[00:01:59]  No.
[00:01:59]  My name is Jax.
[00:02:02]  And here, producing this podcast is a mysterious older male benefactor who I lived with for a number of years in Miami.
[00:02:09]  Wow.
[00:02:09]  Young Chomsky.
[00:02:11]  Wow, you're going there.
[00:02:12]  I'm going.
[00:02:12]  Wow.
[00:02:13]  So let's get out the gates.
[00:02:16]  I think basically every guy on Vanderpump Rules at one point was fucking for money of old men.
[00:02:25]  Look, none of my business.
[00:02:26]  Well, I could make it my literal business.
[00:02:30]  I'm saying, like, none of my business.
[00:02:33]  I don't want to know about it.
[00:02:34]  You don't want to know.
[00:02:35]  Jax is a sex worker.
[00:02:36]  Yeah, there you go.
[00:02:37]  Jax is a sex worker.
[00:02:38]  Jax is a sex worker.
[00:02:39]  He should claim that.
[00:02:40]  Jax is a sex worker.
[00:02:42]  You can't just keep saying it.
[00:02:43]  Jax is a sex worker.
[00:02:45]  I mean.
[00:02:45]  Okay?
[00:02:46]  I, he, we have a lot to tell.
[00:02:50]  The episode's long.
[00:02:51]  Yes.
[00:02:52]  We have our old friend, Sarah Squirm.
[00:02:56]  Sarah Squirm, otherwise known by Sarah Sherman.
[00:02:59]  No, I never call her that.
[00:03:00]  I don't either because I don't think, you know, it doesn't.
[00:03:02]  But you know, for people who didn't know her until SNL, because she's on the TV.
[00:03:07]  Yeah.
[00:03:08]  They just know her as Sarah Sherman.
[00:03:10]  And you know what?
[00:03:10]  They know her online on some of the weird message boards.
[00:03:14]  That's SS.
[00:03:14]  Yeah, that's Sarah.
[00:03:15]  SS, they call her.
[00:03:17]  Well, and for lots of reasons.
[00:03:18]  For lots of reasons.
[00:03:19]  For lots of reasons.
[00:03:20]  And you know what?
[00:03:21]  None of my business.
[00:03:23]  None of my business.
[00:03:24]  I actually do want to take care of, I didn't finish some of my thoughts, though, Liz.

=== Sarah Sherman's Double Life (01:27) ===

[00:03:29]  Jax.
[00:03:32]  His feet thing.
[00:03:33]  We talked about it in the episode.
[00:03:35]  We talked about the episode?
[00:03:36]  Okay.
[00:03:36]  Oh, we do talk about the episode then.
[00:03:38]  Oh, my business is finished here.
[00:03:40]  Well, my business is not because I want to say we had, and I think I mentioned this, but I'm going to double down on it.
[00:03:46]  Some people can double down on it.
[00:03:49]  We had a lot of positive feedback from a lot of listeners who loved our little dive.
[00:03:55]  I'm not going to call it a deep dive, but a little dive, dipping our toes in to the real housewife's waters.
[00:04:02]  The gossips, the messiness, the scary islands.
[00:04:06]  The scary islands.
[00:04:07]  You know what?
[00:04:08]  The smells like hospitals.
[00:04:09]  The Lisa Vanderfumps of it all.
[00:04:11]  So much so that we're here to do it again and give our little, you know, gals and gays a little shout out with Brace literally explaining Scandoval.
[00:04:25]  Scandoval.
[00:04:27]  Let's get to it.
[00:04:43]  What's on your shirt, Sarah?
[00:04:46]  This guy sent me this shirt.
[00:04:48]  Wait, why are you wearing just like, you're like, no one sends me anything?
[00:04:51]  And then you're wearing a hat and a shirt that people say.
[00:04:55]  Liar.
[00:04:56]  Liar, I'm a liar.
[00:04:56]  You know what?