Straight White American Jesus - Monster in the Mirror: Ep. 2 - Dracula's Tale of Two Conspiracies
Aired: 2022-11-07
Duration: 07:37


=== Monster in the Mirror (04:29) ===

[00:00:00]  AXIS Moondi AXIS Moondi Hello friends, and welcome to Straight White American Jesus.
[00:00:16]  I'm Brad Onishi, faculty at the University of San Francisco.
[00:00:20]  Today we are thrilled to launch our brand new limited series, Monster in the Mirror, created and written by Dr. Lucas Kwong.
[00:00:31]  Monster in the Mirror explores the Gothic genesis of Christian nationalism, and it's a little bit unique for our platform.
[00:00:40]  What you're going to hear is a mix of sound collages and original music mixed with Lucas's narration of certain histories and texts, along with dramatic readings of various books and other events.
[00:00:59]  I'm incredibly proud to present it to you, and I hope you really not only enjoy it, but learn a lot from it.
[00:01:07]  Thanks for being here.
[00:01:08]  Here is our series, Monster in the Mirror.
[00:01:15]  And now, this week's episode of The Monster in the Mirror!
[00:01:19]  You have no idea how much pleasure your time machine gave me, Mr. Wells.
[00:01:34]  And the great fortune of Berlin, Recorded on my phonograph device.
[00:01:42]  Would you care to listen?
[00:01:45]  Demand truth.
[00:01:46]  Demand InfoWars.
[00:01:49]  InfoWars.
[00:01:50]  Tomorrow's news.
[00:01:52]  Today.
[00:01:54]  All right, ladies and gentlemen, we have a very, very special guest that's going to be joining us.
[00:02:00]  Oh, Alex, you're making me blush.
[00:02:01]  You know, at the end of the day, I'm just a patriotic American.
[00:02:04]  You've been in the Army, you've been in the Marines, you've been all over the world, you've been Blackwater, you've been State Department security.
[00:02:09]  You've seen it.
[00:02:10]  Uh, okay, yeah, that is true.
[00:02:11]  I'm a patriotic American who's also an extremely big deal.
[00:02:15]  But, you know, I'm not here to talk about how much I can bench press, although I will say it's a lot.
[00:02:20]  No, I'm here to talk about a new energy drink that will revolutionize your life.
[00:02:24]  That's very interesting.
[00:02:25]  I knew some of this.
[00:02:25]  Tell me more.
[00:02:26]  Okay, Alex.
[00:02:27]  Well, let me ask you something.
[00:02:28]  How many times has this happened to you?
[00:02:30]  You're fighting a sadistic cabal of shadowy vampires who will stop at nothing to transform America into a hellhole.
[00:02:36]  You're ready to fight back by replying to one of AOC's tweets.
[00:02:39]  There's just one problem.
[00:02:41]  You're extremely thirsty.
[00:02:42]  Now, Alex, what would you do in that position?
[00:02:45]  Drink a San Pellegrino like a liberal?
[00:02:47]  Fizzy drink that is so essential and so good for your body.
[00:02:49]  What?
[00:02:50]  No, Alex, we rehearsed this.
[00:02:51]  You're supposed to say, screw that, I want to try your new product.
[00:02:55]  It's incredible what it does for me, for energy and happiness.
[00:02:57]  That's more like it.
[00:02:58]  I was in a really bad mood yesterday.
[00:02:59]  Uh-huh.
[00:03:00]  Had a fizzy drink, 30 minutes later... Stop.
[00:03:01]  Happy as a pig in slop.
[00:03:03]  Okay, first of all, weird analogy.
[00:03:05]  Second of all, you're supposed to be helping me hawk my product, Alex.
[00:03:08]  It's insane.
[00:03:09]  Not in... Okay, you know what's insane?
[00:03:11]  The fact that you could get in on the ground floor of this delicious, viscous, red, vaguely rust-smelling, miracle drink for only a trillion dollars.
[00:03:22]  That's right.
[00:03:23]  One time only.
[00:03:24]  Why are we paying a trillion dollars for those pieces of garbage?
[00:03:28]  Wow, Alex, that escalated quickly.
[00:03:31]  Look, you're gonna give yourself a heart attack.
[00:03:33]  Hey, listen, stop shooting your mouth off, claiming I'm the enemy.
[00:03:36]  Okay, well, you know what?
[00:03:38]  This interview's over.
[00:03:39]  I got Peter Thiel on speed dial.
[00:03:41]  He's ready to make my miracle drink the official beverage of his floating private kingdom.
[00:03:46]  Go have fun with it.
[00:03:47]  Oh, I will, Alex.
[00:03:49]  You know what?
[00:03:49]  I'm gonna enjoy my own drink right now here on your show.
[00:03:52]  That's what I call a real diet supplement, Alex.
[00:03:59]  Oh, you're a sexist, oh, oh.
[00:04:09]  But you've got a feeling hurt in your spine.
[00:04:15]  Comparable, oh.
[00:04:22]  I see you there, you're a nice, let's go.

=== Bela Lugosi's Curse (02:11) ===

[00:04:29]  This is Dracula, the original terrifying story of a maniac and a man who lived after death, lived on human the original terrifying story of a maniac and a man who lived after death, lived on human blood, took the form of a vampire bat and lured innocent girls Dracula!
[00:04:57]  In 1931, Bela Lugosi was interviewed on the eve of his new film's release.
[00:05:03]  Asked whether he ever wanted to reprise the titular role, Lugosi responded in a way that sounded more like the character's victims than the character himself.
[00:05:12]  Lugosi said, The curse Lugosi feared the most wasn't the curse of becoming a vampire.
[00:05:16]  through with this picture, I hope to never hear of Dracula again.
[00:05:19]  I cannot stand it.
[00:05:21]  I do not intend that it shall possess me." The curse Lugosi feared the most wasn't the curse of becoming a vampire.
[00:05:30]  It was the curse of being typecast as one.
[00:05:33]  Lugosi didn't know it at the time, but being typecast as Dracula would cement his place in movie history.
[00:05:40]  Lugosi turned out to be just the first of several iconic actors to don the cape and fangs.
[00:05:45]  Christopher Lee, Frank Langella, Gary Oldman.
[00:05:50]  This year, the novel itself received renewed attention with web designer Matt Kirkland's Dracula Daily, a substack that sends readers the original text in excerpts on dates exactly corresponding to those on which the excerpts are written in the novel.
[00:06:04]  And when it comes to film, this year alone sees the release of at least four different Dracula adaptations and spinoffs, not to mention the 30th anniversary re-release of Gary Oldman's turn in Bram Stoker's Dracula.
[00:06:17]  After a century of countless movies, video games, TV shows, and books about Bela Lugosi's least favorite role, Dracula continues to possess us.
[00:06:29]  The original plot of Dracula has undergone so many on-screen contortions that it's helpful to review the plot of the novel Bram Stoker actually wrote.
[00:06:38]  Dracula can be summed up in three words.

=== East West East (00:56) ===

[00:06:41]  East.
[00:06:41]  West.
[00:06:42]  East.
[00:06:43]  In the first section, readers travel eastward with Jonathan Harker, a young, naive, English real estate agent who takes a train ride to the Transylvanian home of his newest client, Count Dracula.
[00:06:55]  Thanks for listening to this free preview of our SWADGE episode.
[00:06:58]  In order to get access to the full episode and so much more, become a Straight White American Jesus Premium Subscriber by clicking the link in the show notes.
[00:07:07]  It'll take you like two clicks, I promise.
[00:07:10]  In addition to getting access to this episode, you'll have access to the entire SWADGE archive, over 550 episodes.
[00:07:18]  You'll also get an extra episode every month, ad-free listening, Discord access, and so much more.
[00:07:24]  All that for less than six bucks a month, and it helps us keep our flag up and continue to safeguard democracy from religious nationalism, extremism, and rising authoritarianism.
[00:07:35]  Check it out.
[00:07:36]  It's not hard.