Hit me with your questions. But I will tell you, my friends.
I have 124 pages done of the Peaceful Parenting book.
Almost 52,000 words.
And, uh... What?
We saved your changes locally.
I don't want to save any changes.
Just close it. I don't want to save it.
Why? I just opened this document and now it's saying, oh yeah, there's changes.
So yes, it's interesting.
It's interesting. I just finished.
See, this is a new thing for me.
I always try new things with books.
I have to try new things with books.
So, of course, originally I wrote at home, then I worked in a coffee shop, and then I started voice dictating while sitting, and then I voice dictated while standing, and then I voice dictated while I was on a treadmill.
And now, for the Peaceful Parenting book, I'm writing it Lifting weights.
I'm just, again, Dragon NaturallySpeaking 16 is a fantastic piece of software.
It's well worth the time to invest in getting this stuff to work.
I don't have any commission. I don't have any interest in the company, but it's really, really great technology.
I've been using it since, oh gosh, since early on.
So early on with voice dictation, this is a joke I stole from some computer magazine, which I've told before, but what the heck?
It's been a while and that's as good as new.
So, originally with voice dictation you had to pause between each word.
And the joke was that most of us first saw voice dictation on Star Trek, where Captain Kirk talked like that anyway.
So yeah, I highly recommend it.
It's kind of pricey, but you can train it on your documents.
You can train it on your emails.
You can have it do custom phrases.
So I say UPB and it types out universally preferable behavior.
It learns as you go.
Every time you correct it, it learns better to the point where I can dictate a page with maybe only one or two corrections.
It's really, really fantastic software, well worth it, and it's transformed my writing.
So the interesting thing is because I'm lifting weights, and I just did an hour and a half's writing this morning while lifting weights, it's actually a pretty punchy book.
I just finished a chapter called The Virtues of Bullying.
I know this isn't going to make any sense.
The name of the software is called, it's by Nuance, N-U-A-N-C-E dot com.
And yeah, I say SBM, it types out my name.
It's called Dragon Naturally Speaking.
Dragon space, naturally speaking, one word.
The latest version is 16, which is, I'm ridiculous.
Like I don't sign up for anything for email, right?
I don't sign up for anything because I want to keep my emails as few as humanly possible.
But I actually sign up for Dragon's email, for Nuance emails, because I'm so excited when a new version comes out.
It's ridiculous. It's absolutely ridiculous.
It's a crazy good software.
I have no idea how it gets my slightly accented continual speech almost bang-on accurate.
It's just incredible. Somebody said, you mentioned in another show about hiring a cottage in England.
Well, it wasn't a whole cottage, but yeah.
When writing just poor, whereabouts did you visit out of interest?
I find the idea of changing surroundings or activity to influence thought and language interesting.
Do you apply this outside of writing?
Yeah, so sitting, this is why I'm sort of...
I was sitting for a long time.
I sort of got things back to standing here.
Standing, moving, walking around.
Like, we have this thing where in order to think, you have to sort of sit kind of hunched over where you're breathing in a shallow way.
And when I do call-in shows...
I used to stand in front of the camera or sit in front of the camera.
I walk around now because I want to walk, I want to move, and for me, shaking up my creativity is really, really important.
I want to write really different things all the time, like I've gone from non-fiction, pure philosophy, to science fiction, to historical fiction, to contemporary fiction.
In England, I've written, of course, about a novel called Revolutions.
In set in Russia.
So I've got to really just change my environment, change my mindset.
It's really, really important for me.
Where did I go? I honestly can't remember.
This is like 25 years ago, but it was really, really remote.
Like to the point where the road only had one lane.
Like it was a muddy two-ditch for the wheels.
Like World War I trenched through the countryside.
Thank you for your tip, Taylor.
I appreciate that. Of course, I live for tips.
I live on tips. Somebody says, I generally do my best thinking while hiking alone.
Yeah, moving, moving, moving.
Moving and thinking is essential.
We end up with a very abstract...
Platonic kind of philosophy or thought if we are just sitting and hunched because we're not moving our body.
And the body and the brain need to be united in terms of real creativity, in my humble opinion.
All right. Let me just get to your questions or comments.
I do have...
Do you have tips for branching out of social awkwardness?
My parents are both on the spectrum and I feel like such a clown when I try to talk to strangers.
Well... You know, because this is a daytime crowd, I don't know exactly where we're sitting and cooking here.
So, diplomatic to blunt, minus 10 to plus 10.
Do you want me to be diplomatic or do you want me to be blunt?
Minus 10 for diplomatic all the way through plus 10 for maximum bluntness.
What would you like?
How would you like your philosophy seasoned today?
Do you want me to be diplomatic or blunt?
Well, it looks like everybody wants me to be blunt.
I'm concerned that if I'm blunt, you won't get the point.
Hell, hell, hell.
All right. Actually, I should probably check for the person who asked the question to see how blunt they want to be.
Because if I'm going to be blunt, Taylor, my friend...
You might not like me for a moment or two, but okay, so Taylor wants me to be plus 10.
Okay. Bludgeoning damage.
That is a great Dungeons& Dragons reference.
Bludgeoning damage incoming.
Oh, that is good.
That is good. So there's bludgeoning damage, there's edge damage, and so on.
Bludgeoning damage. All right. So, Taylor, from 1 to 10, how socially awkward are you?
From 1 to 10, how socially awkward are you?
Just hit me with a number. Oh, Taylor, 7.
Okay, you say 7, so it's not too bad.
Not too bad. Okay. Oh, Taylor, love you to death.
This is bludgeoning damage, but it's meant with great love and affection and positivity, and sometimes it's just good to get the band-aid off.
Are you ready? Hit me with a yes if you're ready for the bluntness on the shy guy.
Hit me with a why. I need to know if you're prepared.
You might need to be sitting on the toilet itself.
This may cause spontaneous diarrhea.
I just want to know.
Yeah, everyone's ready. You're ready, right?
Okay. Taylor, you selfish, selfish bastard.
How dare you? How absolutely dare you put your own anxieties onto other people?
How dare you? You own them.
Your parents own them. They're not responsible for other people.
So your social awkwardness is aggressive against other people because you're not containing your own anxiety.
You're not dealing with it.
You're not being friendly. You're being tense and awkward.
What does that do? It makes other people tense and awkward.
How dare you take the dysfunction that your parents inflicted upon you and go and inflict it on other people?
Stop paying it forward.
Stop cursing it forward.
Get a hold of yourself. Go out there and be nice to people.
He yelled. No, it's really selfish.
Like, if you're shy...
Okay, first of all, if you're shy and you don't want to talk to people, I got a plan.
Don't talk to people. Just don't talk to people because it's awkward for them.
Things are tense. They're weird.
And it makes other people uncomfortable.
Like, how dare you go out there and make all these other people uncomfortable?
That's not right. That's not fair.
That's not good. That's not helpful.
It's not nice. See, shy people are all like, oh, I'm so nice.
I'm such a shy flower. No, you're not.
You're kind of jerks out there inflicting your anxieties on everyone else.
If you don't want to talk to people, how about you just don't talk to people?
Ah, but you say, but I want to be social.
I want to get a girlfriend. I want to get a boyfriend.
I want to be out there socializing with people.
Okay. Okay.
Then deal with your shit and don't go out there making people tense by being super awkward.
See, here's the thing. When someone comes up to me and is socially shy and super awkward, I know that they're not dealing with me.
Why? Because I'm actually a really friendly person.
I'm good to chat with. I like chatting with people.
I enjoy conversations with people, which is why I kind of have a job that involves around having conversations with people because I like talking to people.
Now, if somebody comes up and they're like super shy and nervous and anxious and tense and all of that, it's like, I know there's nothing to do with me.
That's why I say it's selfish. Go out there, be gracious, and make life better and more positive for other people.
Don't treat them like they neglected or abused you.
Why? Because it's unfair, it's unjust, and they didn't!
If someone comes up to me and is like really self-effacing and awkward and tense and shy, they're treating me like I've abused them.
That's wrong. That's wrong.
It's unfair. It's unjust.
It's making the innocent pay for the crime to the guilty.
Like, to me, obviously it's an extreme example, but it's in the moral category of this.
Some guy runs at you with a chainsaw, you go shoot another guy.
And you shoot the other guy, some guy just standing around, and he's like, why the hell did you shoot me?
It's like, well, there was this guy running at me with a chainsaw.
It's like, but it wasn't me. Shoot the guy running at me with a chainsaw.
Don't shoot me. I'm innocent.
So don't treat me like I've abused you when I haven't.
It's wrong. It's unjust.
It's cruel. It's mean.
Oh, the shy people, they're just so nice and they're so awkward.
No, they're not. No, they're not.
They're unjust accusers.
They're making the innocent pay for the crimes of the guilty.
It's wrong. It's cruel.
And you make the good people awkward to pay for the crimes of the bad people that you don't want to confront.
If you confront the bad people, you can be nice to the good people because you can differentiate them.
You know, you shoot the guy running out with a chainsaw, you don't need to shoot the other guy who's innocent.
Because you've removed the threat, right?
So you confront the people who neglected or abused you, you confront them, and then you don't have to make everyone else pay for what they did to you.
Because it's not fair to make me pay for what your parents did to you.
I mean, if your parents...
If your parents ran up a $20,000...
Credit card debt, would you go steal from other people to pay it off?
No! You'll get to steal from other people because your parents ran up a debt.
Your parents ran up a debt and you make them pay.
You don't make innocent people pay for what bad people have done.
Go out there, be friendly and positive in the world.
Most people are pretty nice.
I mean, am I wrong? Most people I meet, even a few people I've met who supposedly dislike me, I chat with them and they're pretty nice.
Most people face-to-face are pretty nice, pretty positive.
Oh man, it bothers me.
Dammit Steph, the truth is hurting me.
That's what I mean, it's selfish.
Because you're taking your trauma, which I have sympathy for.
I'm really sorry that your parents didn't teach you how to interact with people socially.
Like, I'm really sorry about that.
I really am. I'm sorry that you were neglected, right?
But if your parents didn't teach you a particular language that they should have taught you, that's their fault.
It's not my fault. It's not the fault of random strangers.
And please, please, Lord above, stop making the innocent pay for the crimes of the guilty!
Stop treating people who've never abused you like they've abused you.
That's unjust and wrong and immoral.
Oh, but I'm so shy and delicate.
No, you're not. No, you're very aggressive.
Shyness in that way. Maybe there's some natural shyness.
I'm talking about the shyness that comes from being neglected and verbally abused as a child.
You're not shy. You're aggressive because you're treating people Who've never abused you as if they've abused you.
I mean, if you're some district attorney and you're charging people for crimes they never committed in order to cover up the crimes of people who did commit them, we would accept that as a rank, horrible injustice.
Well, but I'm shy to charge the criminals.
I prefer charging the innocent.
I'm shy. I'm a delicate little flower.
No, you're not. You're an unjust accuser of the innocent.
You're putting people in jail who never did anything wrong in order to let the criminals walk free.
It's not nice. It's not delicate.
It's selfish, and it's wrong.
Now, it was wrong that your parents neglected or mistreated you to the point where you end up with this social anxiety.
That's wrong, and I sympathize with that.
I really do. Like, that's a terrible thing that happened to you, or it didn't happen to you in terms of you weren't taught the right things.
I sympathize with that.
But it is a foundational principle of justice that you do not make the innocent pay for the crimes of the guilty.
If your parents mistreated you and neglected you, then go talk to your parents who mistreated or neglected you and deal with that.
But then don't go and project All of the damage your parents did to you, all of the meanness and neglect that your parents did to you, don't go project that on other people and treat them like they're guilty abusers.
It's horrible. And here's the thing too, you get that it's a circular system, right?
This is why accusing the innocent to protect the guilty will never solve your social anxiety.
Do you know why?
Hit me with a why if you know why this doesn't solve it for you
Type faster people Type faster. It's just one letter.
It's the fundamental letter of philosophy.
Why? Why, though?
Right. You got nothing?
Okay. All right.
Well, let's say that you are in a situation...
You're at a party and some guy comes up to you, shoves you and says, why did you grab my girlfriend's ass?
Now, assuming you haven't grabbed his girlfriend's ass, why did you grab my girlfriend's ass?
You pick! I'm going to make you pay for that, right?
How do you feel? How do you feel when you're unjustly accused of something bad?
I mean, I remember...
I was like, I don't know, maybe 12 years old.
I was standing on a balcony at the Eaton Center down at Yonge and Dundas, downtown Toronto.
I was standing with my friend.
And I remember this, I think he was Filipino or Chinese or something, this restaurant owner came up and kneed me in my leg.
He's like, kneed me in the leg, right?
And I was like, what the hell? And he was really enraged.
And he said, you've been spitting on my customers!
And he had a restaurant down there, I guess, below the balcony.
It was like, well, not a balcony balcony, but like something that ringed around.
And he was, you've been spitting on my customers.
Now, of course, I hadn't been spitting on his customers.
I guess someone had.
He looked up and he saw, I guess, myself and my friend who were 12 or 13 years old.
He comes up and he knees me.
And it really hurt, like a charley horse, right?
And he accused me of spitting on his customers, which is something I never, of course, would do in a million years, right?
So I'm sure we've all been exposed to or gone through the process of being unjustly accused of doing something wrong.
Right? So what do you feel?
If they're rude, I might feel angry.
What do you mean if they're rude?
I just gave you the scenario.
Here's your finger jabbed in your face, the guy snarling at you that he's going to make you pay for grabbing his girlfriend's ass.
If they're rude, what do you mean if they're rude?
You can disagree, but please listen first.
That's all I'm asking, right?
How do you feel, startled, defensive?
Okay, how do you feel when somebody accuses you unjustly of a crime?
I'm gonna wait.
Angry, that's right.
Depends on what I think their motivation is.
Like, I've got to work my magic to try and plead my case.
Yes, so you're going to feel maybe a little nervous, maybe a little defensive, homicidal, maybe that's a little too far, oh friend Tulio.
But you're going to get angry, right?
So, even being put in a situation where you have to defend yourself, It's an unpleasant situation to be in.
Like a friend of mine was giving a speech.
He's not a front-facing kind of guy.
He gave a speech for work and he's kind of nervous about it.
And I was just telling him, you know, one of the reasons why, I mean, hit me with a why, hit me with a yes, if you're nervous about public speaking.
If you have to give a big speech or you have to give a speech, a hundred people watching, you're nervous about public speaking.
Okay. Now, do you know why you're nervous about public speaking?
And this is related to the prior topic.
Do you know why you're nervous about public...
Why are people...
Like, there's some people who say that they're more nervous about public speaking than dying, which means, as the old joke goes, if there's a funeral, they'd rather be in the coffin than giving the eulogy, right?
No, it's not a fear of failure.
No, it's nothing to do with that. It's nothing to do with that.
No, the reason why we're nervous about public speaking is, historically, when would we need to give a public speech to the tribe, assuming we're not the leader, right?
When, in a group, in a tribe, in a village, in a community, when would you have to give a public speech?
In court. Yeah, you'd be giving a public speech in a horrible situation where you'd be facing death.
Read Trial and Death of Socrates for an example of that, right?
So yes, we want to avoid public speaking because public speaking means defending yourself against usually the death penalty, right?
Like in England for centuries, they killed about 1% of the population, right?
Because they were the most aggressive or violent or psycho or whatever, right?
So, how do you feel when you're unjustly accused?
You're angry! Right?
Now, what do shy people believe deep down?
They believe people aren't going to like me.
People are going to respond to me negatively.
People are going to be hostile.
They're going to be indifferent.
They're going to avoid me. They're going to look down on me.
They're going to not like me. Isn't that the shy thing?
People aren't going to like me.
Well, you know, funny story, right?
If you're shy, you're accusing someone unjustly of a crime, that person is not going to like you, that person is going to respond to you negatively, they're going to be hostile, mad, angry, defensive, avoidant, whatever.
Oh, look, there's another self-fulfilling prophecy.
Gee, you know, people just don't like me, so I'm tentative to go up to people and then I treat them like they're abusers and then they don't like me because I'm unjustly accusing them of a crime.
Right? I mean, you see how this goes, right?
I don't mean to laugh, but there is a certain dark comedy in it, right?
Right, now...
Thank you.
Well, no, like you have a crystal ball predicting how they'll react.
No, because shy people are shy in part because they have been accused of things unjustly.
So they know exactly how accusing people of crimes unjustly.
I just described the first 30 years of your life.
Well, hopefully not the next 50.
Alright, so...
Would you like to go hit me with a Y?
If you would like to go even deeper.
Because we're not at the bottom yet.
We're not at the bottom. I can take this band-aid right off and there won't even be a wound.
Because this will cure you.
This will cure you. And, okay, if this cures you, will you tip?
Hit a T if you will tip me if I cure you of shyness.
I just need to know what it's worth to you.
Because, you know, I'm a market guy, right?
Now, if I don't, obviously, you know, don't tip if I don't, right?
But if I cure you, this doesn't mean that it's going to be totally easy, but if I will, you will know why you're shy and how to stop.
And you'll be released from the compulsion.
She already did? What does that mean?
I don't know. Anyway. Okay, well, that's fair.
I will hold you to it.
Not shy, but I will tip anyway.
I don't have coins now, but I will tip in another way.
Well, yeah, so, I mean, listen, I like the locals' platform at all, but please remember that if you tip me with coins there, I think Google and Apple take a third away, so it's kind of a pittance, right?
So, if you tipped earlier, that's fine too.
Okay. So, I don't know your parents, Taylor, of course, so I'm just going to talk generically, right?
So, if parents ignore you, They're saying you're not interesting and not likable.
Can we agree on that?
I want to make sure we follow this chain of reasoning here.
Solidly, right? Oh, she already tipped?
No, she tipped. She tipped to identify the problem.
Will you tip to have a solution?
All I have is lemons, but tip yes.
Hey, man, lemons are fine.
I appreciate that. So, if you're ignored, you tipped twice?
Yeah, the two fives.
So, yeah, freedomain.com slash internet if you'd like to help out.
I appreciate that. Okay, so, if you're ignored, it's because...
Your parents are telling you, very explicitly really, they're telling you you're not interesting to me.
Can we agree on that?
You're uninteresting because if something's interesting, you spend time with it.
If the movie is really interesting and great, you watch it to the end, right?
If you walk out of the movie, you're saying the movie is boring or negative or whatever, right?
So you're not interesting, right?
Or if your parents verbally abuse you, they're saying...
You're not interesting and or you're horrible.
You're bad. You're selfish.
You're disrespectful. You're negative.
You're uncaring.
You're whatever, right?
Mean. We'll get to the unimportant details.
That's really important. Okay.
So your parents...
Justify neglecting or verbally abusing you by saying you're boring or bad.
It's the BB gun, right?
Boring, bad, boring, bad, boring, bad.
Double Ds? Yes.
Double Bs? No, right?
You're boring and or bad.
Do we agree on that?
Just hit me with a Y. I'm not saying if you were...
Let's say, do you follow the reasoning?
Yes. All right. All right.
Now, if you go out into the world and you engage with the world in a positive, electrifying manner...
And people respond to you very positively.
They find you interesting, fascinating, deep, insightful, funny, whatever.
A good conversationalist.
I'm not saying you've got to be stellar, but if you're interesting to the world as a whole, what does that do to your parents' view of you?
Your parents say, well, I didn't engage with you because you're boring.
And I yelled at you because you were bad.
So interacting with you is a negative experience.
It's boring or it's bad. Or both.
So if you go out into the world and people find you interesting and worthwhile talking to, how do your parents look in your mind?
Do they look right or wrong?
Do they look right or wrong?
Yeah, they look stupid.
Emotional damage. Yeah, so they're wrong.
They're proven wrong.
Liars or idiots? No, no, no, no.
Much worse than that. Sorry. My friend, paper eater?
Much worse than that. Oh, it's always much worse than that.
I keep waiting to get to the bottom of the hole of hypocrisy of modern parenting.
I'm still digging. I'm concerned that I'm closer to China than Canada.
Of course, most people in Canada are concerned that China is closer to China than Canada.
Like intentionally misguiding?
No! Oh, you guys are so nice.
No wonder you're shy. All right.
Okay, so, if your parents say, well, I don't engage with you because you're bad and or boring, you're a BB, and other people find you interesting and positive, your parents are revealed as assholes, as neglectful, as abusive, as destructive.
They did not refuse to engage with you or yell at you because you were boring or bad, but because they are cruel people who withhold things in order to feel power.
They are cruel people who withhold things in order to feel power.
Alright, hit me with a why if you've ever been in this situation.
You have a baseball cap.
You are around a bunch of unruly kids.
One of the kids takes your baseball cap, rips it off your head, dangles it above you, and when you try and grab it, he throws it to another kid and they all throw the baseball cap around and you're racing around trying to get it, right?
You ever been in a situation like that or something like that?
Yeah, I mean, it happens, right?
Now, why do the children do that?
Because you have something They don't want your baseball cap, right?
They don't care about your baseball cap.
What they care about is you wanting something from them and them denying you that thing.
You want something and they deny that thing.
People get a weird, creepy kind of pleasure out of that if they're kind of sadistic, right?
Does this make sense? Again, I'm sorry to keep interrupting.
I just want to make sure this is a fairly complex but incredibly liberating argument.
Yes, it was my school satchel, but yes.
Yeah, for sure. Stocking cap, though.
Yeah, it doesn't have to be baseball cap.
It could be any number of things, right?
Your siblings did that?
Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I had a relative who would, this is back in the day, who would hide mail from my girlfriend when we were working long distance for a bit.
He would hide mail from my girlfriend and say, I guess she's not really that into you.
He actually took the mail.
So, when... and of course, you know, we can think of the situation where if you get
imprisoned or kidnapped or whatever and the person is like, oh, you hungry?
And they dangle a sandwich and pull it away, and you reach for the sandwich, you get really upset and frustrated, and they feel a weird, creepy kind of power, right?
We can understand that it happens all the time in life, in society, right?
It happens all the time.
Now, children are in a state of bottomless need, right?
They absolutely need their parents.
They absolutely need interaction.
They absolutely, desperately, deeply, viscerally need things from people.
Now, to deny Someone, what they desperately need from you is to hold power over them and feel superior.
So your parents, if they neglected you or verbally abused you, because you need their approval, verbal abuse, you need contact with your parents.
Without contact, without a bond, without providing something of value to them, you die because they don't care, they're indifferent, they won't protect you from predators, they won't give you much food, they'll leave you behind, all that kind of crap, right?
Sorry, let me just make sure I'm...
So, verbal abuse is when they say to you, you're horrible and I don't like who you are
and I'm going to punish you.
or in a state of bottomless need.
They need their parents' attention and they need their parents' approval in order to survive.
Or to put it another way, children who didn't care about their parents' attention or approval didn't make it.
Those genes got weeded out pretty quickly.
So what do you need? You need your parents' attention and you need your parents' approval.
Neglect is denying you attention.
Verbal abuse is denying you approval.
It's torturing you as a child.
It's threatening the bond. Now, your parents, if they are this way inclined, your parents can't just say to you, well, got to square with you, kid.
I got to be honest.
You know, I tell you, honesty is a virtue, kiddo.
So I got to be straight with you.
Listen, I don't know how to put this.
Like, I don't really have...
I don't really have much power in my life.
Like, I'm bossed around and the laws change and the taxes go up and interest rates are through the roof.
And like, I don't really have any power in my life.
I don't really have any control in my life.
But like all human beings, like really all animals, I'm like, I strongly thirst for control in my life.
And I could either work to get more control in my life, like becoming more mature or Adding to my human capital so I could demand more at work or, I don't know, just becoming better and more valuable as a whole so that I'm in demand or something.
I could do that. I could do that in order to feel like I have some power in my life.
But, damn.
Man, that seems like a lot of work, doesn't it?
Like night school and confronting emotional problems and just being a better person as a whole and more valuable to people.
It's a lot of work, man.
So I think I'm going to go with plan B called being a bastard.
A would be acquire skills.
B is be a bastard.
So I feel kind of helpless in my life.
It's a lot of work to improve and gain some control of my life by being in demand.
So instead what I'm going to do to feel like I have control is I'm just going to deny you shit that you need.
Shit that you're programmed to need.
Like stuff like my attention, my approval.
I'm just going to deny you that.
And then you're going to be reaching for me.
You're going to be tortured. But Boy, God, am I going to feel like I have value because you need me.
I'd be like one of those e-thoughts, right?
Like the e-thoughts who will make a lot of money until they accidentally mention that they have a boyfriend and then their careers collapse because need, need.
To feel needed by withholding things from people who don't have a choice is a shitty way.
To pretend you have value.
So your parents can't be honest and say, well, you know, we're just taking the lazy route of denying our kids what they're programmed to need, kids who can't escape us, and that's how we're going to feel like we have value.
You know, you think of someone who, like John Fowles, the collector style, kidnaps a girl and locks him, kidnaps a woman and locks her in the basement.
And she needs him. She needs him to provide food and water.
And she pleads with him for her freedom.
She needs him.
Now, she doesn't need him because he's a good, virtuous, kind, sexy man that she just desires and wants to make babies.
She doesn't need him for that. She needs him because he's withholding things from her, her freedom, food, water.
He's terrifying her and she needs him to release her from that terror.
So your parents, by withholding and verbally abusing, by being neglectful and verbally
abusive, are acting in a way that makes them feel like they have power and value and you
need them and they're withholding and you desperately want things from them and you
need things from them but they won't give them to you.
They won't give them to you.
Thank you.
It's like a woman who knows that when the man sleeps with her he'll stop taking her out for dinner and on vacations.
He'll dump her because he's a pump-and-up kind of guy.
She's just a conquest to him, right?
So she won't sleep with him.
She'll dangle out the possibility, but she won't sleep with him because the moment she sleeps with him, he's gone, right?
She loses all that value.
Somebody says, yeah, my parents have threatened to call police on me aged eight for crying for so long and loud.
Is that neglect? No, no, that to me would be abuse.
Neglect is they just ignore you.
Abuse is they threaten to have your ass thrown in jail.
That's a different thing.
Alright, so are we together so far?
Hit me with a Y if you follow this.
Again, I know you guys do.
You're smart. I just want to make sure that if there's anything unclear, because we're not there yet.
We're not at the bottom yet.
We're just preparing the drill.
Very eye-opening so far.
Yeah, no, we're halfway down.
Are we ready to go deep?
Are we lubed up?
Are we grabbing our shoelaces?
Are we physically relaxed?
Getting hot in here. Well, it's because I'm wearing my muscle tee.
Singular. All right.
So, your parents...
If they neglected, abused you, they need you to internalize that you are boring and or bad so that they look right, not abusive.
Does that make sense?
They need you to internalize and believe that you're bad and boring so that they're right, not abusive.
Let me give you an analogy.
So let's say a child is born with a one-in-a-million, beautiful, kind, Freddie Mercury, Adam Lambert, George Michael kind of singing voice, right?
And his parents continually tell him that he sucks at singing, that he's terrible at singing, that nobody's ever going to want to hear that.
I remember Paul Simon when he first sang to his father.
His father was like, whoa! Because Paul Simon's got this kind of baritone tenor thing that's kind of weak, like the singer from Pet Shop Boys, and that's why he had more success with Garfunkel, who has a really angelic tenor.
His father, who was raised probably on people like Mel Torme and Frank Sinatra and Bobby Darum, was like, no, that's no good.
That's no good. And it's true.
I mean, Paul Simon's not a great singer.
He's got some nice range and some nice tone.
If you listen to American Tune, it's a good song.
But if you have a glorious singing voice and your parents continually tell you that you've got a crap singing voice, it's terrible, it's awful, it's like a cat in a blender, nobody's ever going to hear that, never ever sing again, right?
Now, of course, if you go out into the world and then you end up being a famous singer, you're going to look at your parents and say, man, you guys are assholes, right?
Like, okay, Jim Morrison, not the best singer in the world, but a very powerful vocalist.
You listen to 5 to 1 and, you know, this growl, very original, spontaneous, and powerful vocalist.
And he himself said he wasn't a great singer, Now, his father hated his singing voice, refused to play his records, and it was only much later in his life that his father said, well, I guess Jim did have something, and I guess I'm glad that people enjoyed his music.
By the way, Jim Morrison's father was in charge of the Gulf of Tonkin accident.
He was a naval commander.
Very interesting connection.
So, if you've got somebody with a beautiful singing voice, and their parents say, you're terrible and you shouldn't do this, right?
Now, if the parents are wrong, then they're mean, right?
So, the parents don't want to be proven wrong.
Mean parents don't want to be proven wrong.
If your kid is not a good singer and says, I'd just love to be a singer, and, you know, you get him some lessons or whatever, but they just, you know, they're a little tone deaf, the voice is just not pleasant sounding, it doesn't have any range or flexibility or connection or emotional power or anything like that, then if you say to your kid, listen, I don't think you should be a singer.
Like, it's not really that good.
And we've tried the lessons and all of that.
Like, for whatever reason, it's just not your thing, right?
And I don't think you should do it. And that's fair.
I mean, those of us who've spent any time at a karaoke bar, hit me with a Y if you've spent a time at a karaoke bar, those of us who've spent any time at a karaoke bar knows that singing quality, singing talent, singing ability Not exactly evenly distributed across the population as a whole.
I remember once with my wife, we were in, I think, Las Vegas.
I was there for some business thing many years ago.
And you know that song, and she will be loved, and she will be loved.
And anyway, there was a guy, and it's a very high note.
Is that Maroon 5?
Anyway, I can't remember who it is, but it's a really high falsetto that Adam, dude, can...
Can do. And I just remember this guy was like...
Is it Maroon 5? Yeah.
And I just remember this guy was just like...
He's like, I'm just going to hit that note.
And sometimes you hit the note and sometimes you just punch and bloody it.
And so, you know, you've got to like...
And she will, beloved.
Like, it's really got to float up that way.
And he was just like... And she will!
Like, just... It's like, you got the note.
But it's like, you're shredding, right?
So... Let's get back to the analogy, right?
So if you're a good singer and your parents say you're a bad singer, they're mean.
If you're a bad singer and your parents say that you're a bad singer, they're helping.
They're good parents, right?
It's not good parenting to tell your child that he or she can do something that he or she can't do, right?
You've never karaoke'd? I think it's worth trying once.
Singing is hard, man.
Well, no, it's not, if you're a great singer.
If you're a great singer, singing is not hard at all.
I mean, it's very, very easy.
Like there's a little trill, I guess a scale down that Freddie Mercury does in Somebody to Love right after he does the falsetto.
I can't do it. I think I've done it once in my life.
Somebody to love.
He does this sort of scale down.
Nobody else has done it. And he could do it live.
Just rip off this beautiful semi-third scale down.
Just fantastic, right? And even George Michael, who's a great singer and was the only guy who could match Freddie Mercury in the 93 Freddie Mercury concert after he died of AIDS, He did Somebody Love, did a fantastic thing.
He didn't do that scale down, because George Michael, a great singer, couldn't do it.
And he just did Somebody Too, and then he just said, yeah, go to the crowd, just do it, right?
You karaoke'd Walking on Sunshine?
Yeah, that woman has a great voice, right?
Here's a piece of your car.
Yeah, she's a great voice. Katrina and the Waves, right?
So, no, singing is not hard if you're good at it.
It is hard if you're not good at it, right?
Freddie Mercury specifically never took singing lessons.
He said, I want my voice to be raw and natural, right?
Now, he loved singers, Montserrat Caballet, this very famous singer, Spanish singer, something like that.
He did a whole album with her called Barcelona.
And you should listen to The Golden Boy.
It's actually a very good song.
Sort of a mixture of opera, rock, and...
Gospel. It's a very sort of interesting song called The Golden Boy.
You should check it out. And actually when Freddie Mercury's last live performance was with Montserrat Caballet, they did Barcelona, The Golden Boy, Exercises in Free Love, maybe something like that.
But it was one of the only times he ever mimed.
Like he lip-synced.
And actually they started off the tape playing at the wrong speed.
I'm a Bob Dylan, Johnny Cash type of singer.
Yeah, doesn't have to be fantastic vocals like Celine Dion.
Or, I mean, she's really got toasted by something or other, right?
This health issue, she's got her brutal.
But if it suits, like Bob Dylan suits what he does.
Johnny Cash suits, yeah, Johnny Cash, not a great singer.
Mick Jagger, not a great singer, but it suits what he does.
Jim Morrison, not a great singer, suits what he does.
So, sorry, this is taking a long time, but let's get back to the core, right?
Now we get to the bottom.
Your parents program you to be unappealing to people.
Because your parents, if they are this way, if they neglect and abuse you, your parents say you're bad and boring.
And so they program you to elicit negative responses from people.
Why do they do that?
So they're never proven wrong.
So shyness is parental programming to elicit negative responses from people so that you don't find out that your parents are wrong.
They say, you're bad and boring, you're bad and boring, you're bad and boring.
You go out in their world and you're projecting all of this negativity and abuse and neglect onto people.
They react to you negatively.
They don't find you interesting.
They react in a negative or hostile or avoidant manner.
And then your parents say, hey man, see, we were right.
You are bad and boring.
Look what happens to you in the world.
We're just empirical. We were just telling you the truth.
You are a bad singer. You shouldn't try to sing.
I mean, you can go out there and try and sing, but you see how every time you sing, people just leave the bar, they cover their ears, they grimace, they wince.
So shyness is your parents programming you to prove them right.
I'm not saying it's conscious. It doesn't matter.
In fact, the more unconscious it is, often the more effective it is.
But now this is the route.
You are shy to serve your parents' need to be right about you being bad and boring.
Well, I ignored you because you were boring, and I yelled at you because you were bad.
And that's not my fault. That's your fault.
You are bad and boring. And if you want proof, just look at how you go out there in the world.
Do people find you interesting and positive and great and fun?
No! They react negatively to you just as I did.
I was just being empirical.
You're just serving your parents need to not be revealed as abusers
Why do you accuse the innocent rather than the guilty to cover up a crime
Why are you shy?
To cover up the crime of your parents' neglect and abuse.
You are serving them, you are proving them right, you are doing exactly what they need you to do, so that their abuse is never revealed to you, and most importantly, to them.
And boom!
We are at the bottom.
We are all raised to please our parents.
And if our parents gain power by pretending we are bad, we pretend we're bad, we pretend we're boring, and we go out there and we serve their need by being bad, quote, end quote, boring, out there in the world, so our parents can say, Yeah, I guess I was right.
And they can also say, well, you know, I did try and correct you being bad and boring, but you kept resisting it, and you kept not listening to me, and you kept saying, oh no, I'm not bad and boring, but now you didn't listen to me, and now you're out there in the world, and people are just treating you like you're bad and you're boring.
I tried to fix it, I tried to cure it, but you just wouldn't listen and the sadism and the cruelty can't fucking
continue.
Yeah, that lady of just poor.
Yeah, Barbara. Lady Barbara of just poor hits this very well.
Yeah. Very well.
Very well. It's like those weird single moms.
Particularly with their sons.
The single moms feel that sexuality has destroyed their lives, so they never ever train their boys to be sexual creatures.
They never ever train their boys to be attractive, to be romantic, to be charismatic, to be smooth, to be...
They give them bad haircuts and bad...
clothing and often will overfeed them and They just even body odor and and they don't teach them
hygiene Somebody says any idea as to why I and others would be
professionally confident around people but personally shy Tipped on free demand.
Yeah, come on. You said you'd tip.
Not you, right? But everyone said they would tip if I cured.
And this is the cure.
The cure is stop serving your parents.
They're wrong. You weren't boring.
You weren't bad. And stop eliciting that response in people by unjustly accusing them of what your parents actually did.
Put the blame on your parents.
Go out there. Be friendly.
Be positive. Prove your parents wrong.
They'll hate it, but you'll love it.
Professionally confident around people, but personally shy.
That's because you probably were raised with more of a Male influence and less of a female influence.
In other words, you probably had more respect for your father than your mother.
So that your father will teach you how to be economically valuable.
Your mother will teach you how to be more dating valuable.
So if you're more confident professionally than you are in a personal way, it's probably because you believe that you can provide economic value but not interpersonal value, if that makes sense.
And economic value generally comes from the father and personal value generally comes more from the mother.
Somebody says, I suffered the opposite, where I catered to people's shyness by the me plus value problem.
Oh yeah, going out there and trying to fix shy people.
No man, you are good enough. No man, you are fine.
Going out there and trying to cater to people's shyness and fix them.
Yeah, that's... Well, that's another way of feeling like you can have power without having to be good.
You know, it's funny how goodness is so often perceived as niceness.
I don't know. It's bizarre.
It's like niceness is just the female version of virtue, and the male version of virtue is combat.
Right? The female version of virtue is niceness, and the male version of virtue is combat.
Am I wrong?
I don't think I'm wrong about that.
Alright, let me get to some of your other questions.
I don't think I got tips from people who said they were going to tip.
So, you know, do the honorable thing if you said, no, maybe you didn't think that that was the cure, but I guarantee you there's no deeper answer than that.
If that's not the cure, there's no cure, in my humble opinion.
All right. Let's see here.
Let's get to your questions. Anyone else constantly corrected by parents over the most unimportant details no one else on earth cares about?
Somebody said, oh, the person who asked that question, wow, that would match up.
Thank you. My father is mostly great, but my mother has suffered from mental health and poor social skills throughout my life.
Are you going to make me dry heave on this innocent microphone?
It's not the microphone's fault that you're full of these kinds of delusions, my friend.
Oh, holy hairball of pathological altruism.
Oh, Francis.
Oh, Francis, talk about falling into the will of female self-pity to the point where your balls dissolve.
Holy God!
Okay, what am I complaining about here, people?
Wow, that would match up.
Thank you. My father is mostly great, but my mother has suffered from mental health and
poor social skills throughout my life Steph the most precise therapeutic philosopher on the
planet All right, what am I complaining about?
What Francis... What did he type that's having me dry heave all over this innocent mic cover?
My father and mother are one flesh?
Yeah, okay. Random biblical quotes is not philosophy.
What am I complaining about?
His father chose his mother?
Well, that's putting the responsibility on the father.
Father, you're still protecting the mother.
White knighting his mom, yeah for sure.
Yeah, absolutely. Bang on, Evan.
Bang on. My father is mostly great.
My mother has suffered from mental health and poor social skills throughout my life.
She's just suffered. She's just a victim.
It's mental health issues.
She has poor social skills.
She just has them.
You know the way that some people have a big nose.
She just has them.
The way that some people have...
Excess hair on their upper lip if they're female.
They can't blame her.
She's not responsible for anything that she does.
She's just suffering from mental health and poor social skills.
This was just the cross she was given, the burden she has to bear.
Let's all get together in a kumbaya, fire-crackling good hug to absolve my mother of any moral responsibility for dealing with her issues.
Just bad luck, you know?
It's like a brain tumor out of nowhere.
It's just a victim. Now, of course, if you don't hold women responsible, why do I say you have to hold women responsible?
Why do I say that? Well, A, because it's true, but there's lots of true things that I can say.
Why am I constantly hammering this point?
Hold women responsible!
Why? Why is this so essential?
Because I'm angry at my mom?
Well, yes, of course. But no, not just that.
Why do I say, hold women responsible?
To give them free will, that's just another way of saying that.
Why do I care so much about you all holding women responsible?
So you can find a good woman to marry yeah, yeah Yeah. So that you can love a woman.
So that you can fall in love with a woman.
Love is the greatest thing in the universe.
It's what makes everything else worthwhile.
If you don't hold women responsible, if you view them as brain-damaged children, well, I hope that you won't be romantically attracted to such creatures.
Hold women responsible so that you can admire a woman for her virtues.
So you can fall in love, be protected, be safe, be bonded, and have a great mother for your children and a great companion for your life.
If you don't hold women responsible for anything, you can't ever admire them, you can't ever fall in love, you can't ever pair bond.
You can't create a safe home to raise your children in, and you can't have all of the beauty, joy, comfort, and depth of love throughout the course of your life.
I mean, if you want, I'm here for you, my friends.
If you want, we can go even deeper on this one than we did on the shyness thing.
But it's your show.
I'm here to serve you. I really am, honestly.
I'm here to serve you.
Do you want to know why dysfunctional mothers claim victimhood?
Yes, please. I would appreciate this massively.
Are you sure?
I say this every show, but I'm not kidding.
You won't be the same afterwards.
It's going to change a lot more than the shyness thing.
You know what? Oh, it's your biggest problem?
All right. Sorry, I went through my coffee overly quickly here.
I need to wet my whistle.
Hang tight. I'll be right back.
Okay.
All right.
Actually, the first time ever in 17 years I've had to break for water.
But because I'm writing and the writing is quite passionate, it's voice dictating,
I've already done a couple hours of voice work and now I've done another hour of significant voice work.
I just want to make sure I protect the instrument, so wetting it is helpful.
Alright, let's go back to our good friend's comment here.
My mother has suffered from mental health and poor social skills throughout my life.
She's just suffered from them.
They just inflicted upon her.
It wasn't her fault, like a genetic illness.
She had no choice. Now, why would mothers play the victim over something they can genuinely control?
Why would they play the victim over something they can genuinely control?
I mean, my mother would claim, of course, that she just lost her temper, but that's a total lie because she never lost her temper in public.
She never lost her temper in front of policemen or priests or at the mall or anywhere.
When we were over at friends' places, she never lost her temper.
She was perfectly, perfectly, perfectly able to control her temper.
It wasn't like Tourette's or epilepsy or anything like that.
So she never lost her temper in public.
She only lost her temper in private.
Now, she would claim, well, I was out of control of my temper.
It's a total lie. I was just a victim of this demon called temper that possessed me without any badness on my part.
It just came in and took over.
Right?
Uh, to get pity?
No. Remember the pattern is, if your parents mistreat you, it's to provoke actions within you That never disprove the lies they told while abusing you.
Why do parents mistreat you because they're selfish and vicious and sadistic as a whole?
and they never want to be proven wrong.
A bad mother cannot have a good woman around you.
A bad mother cannot have a good woman around you. Why?
What will a good woman say about your bad mother?
What will a good woman say about your bad mother?
Bye.
Thank you.
She'll call out the falseness of the mental illness.
My mother hated my husband when I first met him.
Yeah, yeah, my family basically demanded that I choose between my wife and my family.
I'm like, can you not make it a tougher choice?
Because this one isn't even tough.
So, this is back to you, my friend.
I think your name is Francis.
My mother has suffered from mental health and poor social skills throughout my life.
Okay, let me ask you this.
Let me ask you this, friend.
Genuine friend, we're brothers in arms here, brothers and sisters in arms, all in the trenches.
Did your mother punish you for doing things wrong when you were a child?
Did she speak of you negatively?
Did she spank you? Did she put you in timeouts?
Did she criticize you?
Did she criticize you as a child for being, quote, bad or doing wrong?
Come on, Frances. Yes, she did.
Of course she did. From the age of three, four, five onwards?
Is that right? From very young, right?
From very young. Yeah.
So, 3, 4, or 5.
Okay, let's just say 4. I'll split the difference, right?
So, from the age of 4, now, how old was your mother when you were 4 years old, my friend?
How old? Just give me the number.
How old was your mother when you were four years old?
35. Okay.
Wow, 35. 35.
Someone says 24. Ah, teenage birth.
Alright. So, you see, your mother, Frances, your mother operated on the absolute assumption that you as a four-year-old were perfectly responsible for your own behavior.
Could do better and should be punished for making mistakes, doing wrong or being bad.
At the age of four, you were 100% responsible for your own choices and behavior at four.
Right?
She did not forgive you for what you did when you were four.
Thank you.
But she should be infinitely forgiven for what she did in her mid-30s to mid-50s.
No forgiveness for the four-year-old.
Infinite forgiveness for the grown-ass adult.
You were fully in control of your own choices and behavior when you were four.
But she, in her 40s, was just a victim and had no control over her behavior.
Infinite responsibility for a 4-year-old, zero responsibility for a 35-year-old.
The 35-year-old, who says she has zero responsibility for her actions, says it's absolutely essential to hold a 4-year-old 100% responsible for his actions.
Punish the victim.
Forgive the abuser.
In fact, in fact, you see, it's abusive to hold your mother responsible for what she did when she was 40.
It's abusive to hold her responsible for what she did when she was 10 times the age, what she punished you for.
See, if she had forgiven you at four, that would have been terrible because you are responsible at four for what you do.
Oh, are you failing to forgive your mother what she did when she was 40?
Well, that's just mean and abusive.
She wasn't responsible at 40.
I mean, this is more than morally insane.
Honestly, I literally fucking feel like I should get an oxygen mask dropping down from the ceiling because these fucking fumes are fetid.
It's like pushing my face into the distended belly of a rotting corpse.
You at four are a morally responsible actor.
She at 40 is an innocent victim.
She punishes you because you're bad, because you have full responsibility.
If you give her even 10% responsibility, you're bad, you're abusive, and she's the victim.
So you see 100% responsibility to the four-year-old, but if the four-year-old, when he grows up,
becomes 24, even tries to hold his mother 10% responsible, he's just mean and abusive
and unsympathetic and she's just got all these problems.
Now a good woman, and there are good women, there are good men, many of them here on this
Thank you, thank you.
A good woman comes along and sees your mother who abused you as a child, giving you 100% moral
responsibility, playing the victim in her fifties.
What does the good woman say?
...
You've got to be kidding me.
She punished you at the age of four because you were 100% morally responsible.
And then she demands forgiveness in late middle age because she's never been responsible for anything?
So what would the good woman say?
Tulia says, I'm out! Rowland says, goodbye!
No! No! It's worse than that.
Remember, it's always worse than that.
The good woman will confront you and or your mother for this rank hypocrisy.
Thank you.
Right? She will just ask you, and honestly, the world is like 20 seconds away from moral clarity and has been for the last three fucking billion years.
It's like 20 seconds away from moral clarity.
The moral clarity is, wait, she punished you when you were four because you were 100% responsible, but then when you criticize her as an adult, she's 0% responsible?
How can a four-year-old be infinitely more morally responsible than a 40-year-old?
I don't understand. How tough is that?
Right? What was that? 10 seconds?
15 seconds? That's all you need to do.
The whole world is poised and running and tense and frantic about these 10 to 15 second sentences being spoken.
BOOM! Now, a good woman is going to point this out because a good woman takes responsibility and like all people who take responsibility, we're kind of disgusted with people who blame children and then take no responsibility for their own actions as parents.
It's kind of gross, right?
So she's going to point this out.
And then either you, or you and her, or she, are going to sit down and say,
Okay, Mrs.
Thank you.
Francis. I'm a little confused here.
You know, I love your son. He's a great guy.
But there does seem to be a bit of confusion here.
Like, he says that you punished him as a child when he was like four years old or more.
Maybe even earlier. I assume earlier, right?
So you punished him when he was two or three or four years old.
Because I assume he was responsible for what he did and had to be punished because he was bad or whatever.
But... You can't be criticized because you're just a victim of everything?
Help me understand how he has all this moral responsibility when he's a little toddler, but you have no moral responsibility in your 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, whatever, right?
I don't understand that.
And then the mother said, well, I parent the way I was parented.
And then you say, well... But you claim that you're a victim of mental health and poor social skills, so if you parent as you were parented, then you started off with moral responsibility, just as your son did at 2, 3, or 4, or 5 years old, and then the parenting that you received stripped you of moral responsibility because you're just a victim of everything, and therefore you took a boy with moral responsibility and parented him like you were parenting with the sure knowledge that that was going to strip him of moral responsibility.
And turn him into you, who has no responsibility for anything.
So why would you, if moral responsibility is so important, why would you parent in a way that you knew for sure would strip moral responsibility from your children?
That's like saying the most important thing is good health and then feeding your parents junk food and never letting them out of the house.
Like, I don't understand.
How well would that conversation go?
Okay.
Somebody says, this is highlighting...
Sorry, Francis says, this is highlighting some problems I've had with girlfriends past and current.
I remember my current girlfriend reacting angrily to a comment I made after my mother said something.
Oh, that's just my mom for you.
This really angered her and now I understand why.
Yeah, for sure. For sure.
For sure. The reason it angered her is that if you don't hold your mother morally accountable, then you can't hold women morally accountable, which means you're only there for sex.
Right? You're using them, and your girlfriend fully understood that.
Because if you don't hold your mother morally responsible, you're saying women are not morally accountable, therefore you can't admire a woman, you can't love a woman, therefore why would a woman be in your life?
for sex. You're using her.
But we're not at the bottom yet.
sigh Ah, yes. Ah, yes.
But how's everyone doing?
Just give me a check in here because we're going pretty hard, pretty deep.
How's everyone doing? We're not at the bottom yet.
I just am going to check in.
Good, go deeper. I like it deep.
All good here. You're following?
Okay. Now...
If your girlfriend confronts your mother with this moral contradiction, how does your mother react?
You got crushed a few miles back.
How does your mother react when your girlfriend confronts her on this moral contradiction?
She will tell you to get rid of her, your girlfriend, yeah.
She tries excuses, then gets angry.
She'd get rude. She would get aggressive, right?
she would get angry and get aggressive and try to punish your girlfriend, right?
So look at that Your mother holds an adult female morally responsible for asking questions.
Look at that. Suddenly, in a strange twist of fate, adult females are completely morally responsible.
Isn't that weird?
Why wouldn't your mother say, well, you know, I'm not going to take offense because clearly you're socially awkward and you're suffering from mental health issues.
I'm not gonna get mad at you."
So, she doesn't do that, right?
We're still not at the bottom, but we're close.
We're still not at the bottom, but we're close.
And tell me this isn't worth tips, people.
Come on, you know how hard I'm working here.
And I've been working on this shit for 40 years.
You're just getting the tip of the iceberg of all the work I put in.
100,000 plus hours to get this concise and this powerful.
freedomain.com slash donate
Yeah, crypto certainly has less overhead than coins on locals for sure.
FreeDomain.com slash donate.
So your mother is asked a reasonable question, like help me understand how a four-year-old is morally responsible but an adult is not.
She's asked a question.
And what... What your mother does is get exceedingly angry and blame and castigate your girlfriend for asking her question.
Maybe your mother spanked you when you were four.
She used violence against you when you were four.
And that's totally fine.
To even criticize that is abusive.
But if your girlfriend dares to ask a question of her, she gets really angry at your girlfriend.
Now, your girlfriend, she says, how dare you accuse me?
After the prerequisite manipulations and gaslighting and fogging and all that, she's going to blow up in anger.
Ask your girlfriend, right? Now what does your girlfriend then say?
Play this out. Because we all have this played out in our head, which is why we tend to avoid quality women, or rather why we tend to serve our dysfunctional mothers by avoiding quality women.
What does your girlfriend say when your mother gets angry?
She says, oh, you're angry at me, so I'm morally responsible at the age of 25 for what I say, or questions that I ask.
I'm morally responsible and should be punished for what I say at 25, but weirdly, when you hit your child when you're 35, you're a total victim, totally innocent, and to even question that is abusive.
Like, I don't understand.
Are adults morally responsible or not?
Well, it's different because I'm mentally ill.
And then your girlfriend can say, well, how do you know I'm not mentally ill?
Like, you just got mad at me. You didn't inquire as to whether I'm on medication or under treatment.
You just got mad at me. You didn't try and find out whether I was mentally ill or have poor social skills or something.
Like, you just got mad at me.
Well, are you mentally ill?
See, now, the moment that your excuse gets questioned, it's different, right?
It's not a matter of intelligence.
See, I'm not sure any girlfriend would be that smart.
It's not a matter of intelligence.
It's not a matter of intelligence.
I'm telling you this.
My daughter, at 16 to 18 months, was reasoning all this through, and if you doubt any of that, man, just wait till your kids are teenagers and you make one statement that contradicts anything you said over the past 4,000 years, and they're like, boom, but 4,000 years ago you said this, now you're saying this.
It's not a matter of intelligence.
You know, if a kid under two can do it, you don't need to be that smart.
You just need to be unprogrammed.
Deprogrammed. Because this stuff's obvious.
Are people morally responsible or not?
It's not a matter of intelligence.
It's just a matter of integrity. Integrity looks brilliant, but it's not.
It's just uncomplicated.
So, your girlfriend asking questions of your mother
reveals the basic contradiction.
That you're bad at four because you're responsible, but your mother is never bad at any time because
she's never responsible.
Now she can't say adults are never responsible.
Thank you.
Because she's holding your girlfriend, who's an adult female, responsible for what she says.
You just donated? Well, thank you.
I appreciate that. I am clearing the logs on the path of your heart to love.
It's foundational.
I'm clearing the logs on the path of your heart to love.
Let me finish this before you ask me to answer another question.
Just hang in there.
I'm doing important stuff here.
Just be a little patient.
We're going real deep here.
Let me concentrate. It's not always about you.
Now, Your mother is then revealed as blindingly hypocritical, right? And she holds everyone responsible, adult females, little boys, little girls, and it's moral and necessary and right and good to hold little boys,
little girls, adult females responsible for their actions, but the moment anyone tries to hold her responsible for her actions, Well, that's wrong and bad to hold me responsible for my actions.
Now, how do we know your mother ain't crazy?
Because you see, what's happening here is the criminal child abuser is claiming what?
The insanity defense.
Do you follow? Criminal child abuser, in my view, criminal child abuser is claiming the insanity defense as they all do when caught.
Never happened.
You're wrong. Illusions, delusions, fantasy, made up, aggressive, abusive.
If, if she's caught, she claims she's copping the insanity plea.
Am I right? Well, I'm having a mental health crisis.
How do we know the insanity defense is a lie?
How do we know? Free agency in other contexts?
Yeah, I mean, that would be stuff.
Yeah, she only does it under the right circumstances, for sure.
Yeah, absolutely.
If everything she does serves her own interests, she cannot claim the insanity defense.
If a man is convicted of stealing from people in a park and he says, look, I'm compelled
to just randomly take things, but every single thing he took was money, a wallet, an expensive
watch, a cell phone, and he never took anything that didn't have value.
He cannot then claim that he just randomly steals.
Thank you.
We're still not at the bottom, but we're close.
You can't claim the insanity defense if Every perspective is to The insanity defense is having no knowledge of right or wrong.
And look, I mean, I'm sure at times, like, somebody's got a brain tumor, they're full-flight psychosis, schizophrenia, whatever, right?
It's no knowledge of right or wrong, right?
The insanity defense is I have no knowledge of right or wrong.
How do we know that the insanity defense with regards to child abuse is always false?
Hiding the body is one thing for sure.
But it's even more provable than that.
How do we know that the insanity defense called no knowledge of right or wrong is false?
Their moral condemnation of you.
Boom! Yeah, because they're always using morals.
They're always using morals.
Because they morally correct you, they morally punish you.
It literally is like claiming that you could not have committed the crime because you have no knowledge of Japanese while speaking in fluent fucking Japanese.
It's that crazy. When you morally correct people, you can't claim the insanity defense.
Because the insanity defense is saying, I have no knowledge of right or wrong, good or evil.
But when you tell your children what you did was wrong and bad, and you punish them, then you are absolutely punishing them on the basis of moral knowledge.
And therefore, you can't claim you have no capacity for moral knowledge if you punish children based upon moral fucking knowledge.
Ahhhh!
Are we there?
It would be like the thief saying, I had no idea
that stealing upset people.
...
Okay, let's try this.
A thief steals a wallet, goes home, Turns out the guy had an RFID chip in his wallet, goes and steals it back.
The thief is enraged and angry and pursues the guy and says, how dare you take the wallet?
And then he says, in his defense, I had no idea that there was anything wrong or bad or upsetting about stealing.
It's like, well, no, because you got angry, enraged, upset when someone, quote, took something back.
The thief is outraged if someone steals whatever he stole, therefore he can't say that he has
no knowledge of good or bad, right or wrong, upset, right?
When people act in a manner over decades entirely consistent with their selfishness, they cannot
claim the insanity defense.
If someone tries to hide a crime, they can't claim that they had no knowledge that it was illegal.
The insanity defense is when you strangle a kitten right in front of a policeman while babbling in made-up language.
Then you can say, like I was completely out of control of my behavior, if you run a crime syndicate, bribe cops, bribe judges, hire accountants to launder your money, Consistently obfuscate your dealings in a webby network of false front corporations.
You can't then say, I was insane.
Francis says, yeah, we're pretty much there.
This is heavy stuff. Much appreciated.
Double tip. Thank you. I remember having such an intuition as a child.
My mom thinks she is a god.
She is God. Well, but being God would come with some responsibility, right?
God is responsible for teaching humanity how to be good and avoid hell.
There is no insanity defense for any kind of consistent child abuse or any child abuse that involves moral condemnation.
.
There's no insanity defense.
A mental illness, out of control, is not a defense.
Now, there is another common defense, which Frances mentioned, if you're just listening.
What is the other common defense for parents who are caught in their abuse?
What's their other defense?
If you disprove the insanity defense, Yeah, that they were abused.
That's right. So this is what our good friend, I don't mean that in any way, ironically, our good brother-in-arms.
Francis says, to add a layer of depth, I used to be more angry towards my mother in general.
When I was 18 or 19, I learned that she was abused by a past partner and stabbed.
After learning this, my views changed towards explaining away her faults with this information.
This has led to me not letting her be morally accountable and taking away my respect for her, as you stated previously.
How do you look past trauma and respect people enough to hold them accountable?
Well... If some monster held your hand in flames as a child and it burned you, and you saw that burn and you felt the leathery skin and the ache to this day, does that dictate that you also hold a child's hands in a fire?
Does it? Because it happened to you and you know exactly how painful it is.
Does that dictate that you then do it to helpless children?
Come on, people.
Come on. You know exactly how much it hurts.
You have less excuse than someone who wasn't abused to abuse your children.
Less excuse.
You're raised by an alcoholic.
Bye.
.
He's home again.
He's drunk again. He's beaten down the walls again.
Where is the love that will open the door?
Raised by an alcoholic.
You know exactly how bad it is.
How terrible it is.
You have less excuse than somebody who wasn't raised as an alcoholic for drinking as a parent.
I know and I think many of us here know exactly how bad it is to be raised in violent anti-rationality.
Right? We know.
If it didn't happen at home, it might have happened at school, it might have happened at other places.
But we know. I know exactly how painful it is to be abused as a child.
We have no excuse for inflicting it.
I know how bad it is to be beaten, so I don't beat. Right?
We all know how scary it is when a parent screams at you.
I don't raise my voice. We know how parental language scourts and burns and brands us in our souls.
So I don't use negative language with my daughter or my wife or my friends, right?
I'll swear in passion against evil But I know.
Right? We know.
So you say, when I was 18 to 19 I learned that she was abused.
my mother was abused by a past partner and stabbed.
So at eighteen to nineteen let's say that your mother
I don't know, was 20 or 25.
Let's just say she was 22 when she was abused by a partner and stabbed.
Okay. That's bad, obviously.
I hope the guy went to jail. But that excuses nothing about her parenting at all.
Because, you see, your mother would say, I was abused by a boyfriend I chose.
I was abused by a boyfriend I chose when I was 22.
But I'm not responsible.
I'm a victim for what I chose when I was a full-grown adult.
I am not responsible for what I chose as a full-grown adult.
But you, as a four-year-old, are 100% responsible for your choices and must be punished.
It doesn't help. See, what I'm doing is I'm playing whack-a-mole to all of the excuses implanted by bad parents in our minds to excuse abuse.
No excuse for abuse.
None. Zero.
Life is so much simpler if you say, nope.
Because if you're going to say, well, my mom at 22 was a total victim of her choices, that's fine.
Then she's going to say, well, geez, when I was 22, I was making terrible choices.
So I can't punish a four-year-old for his choices because I was 18 years past being four and I was still making terrible choices.
Of course I can't punish a four-year-old for his choices because I, as a grown-ass adult, was still making terrible choices.
Tell me I'm wrong. Help me out.
If I'm wrong, save me from my fog of falsehood.
Tell me. Tell me how I'm wrong.
I would love to be wrong about this because it would be a lot less battle with the world
and it would be kind of useless and bad.
I had no responsibility as an adult, but you at the age of three or four are 100% responsible.
Thank you.
I deserve sympathy for my bad adult choices.
You deserve punishment for what you chose at the age of three or four.
Bullshit! Bullshit!
I don't care about the feelings of people who've abused their children.
I care about future children not being abused.
You can't have any progress morally if you only care about the people who are condemned by moral progress.
Or think about the poor feelings of the slave owners.
We can't tell people that smoking is dangerous.
We're going to stress out a bunch of people who smoked.
Nope.
Why am I a good parent?
Despite having a terrible childhood.
It's kind of an important question, right?
Why am I a good parent despite having a terrible childhood?
I don't excuse abuse.
Yep. I was saying this in a call-in show the other day.
I remember when I was a kid, I came back from summer camp.
And my daughter, sorry, my mom was, she met me at the Yonge and Eglinton subway station.
I got dropped off somewhere north, like York Mills or Shepherd or something.
I took the subway down. My mom wanted to see me.
So I came out with all of my bags and stuff and saw my mom.
And then she got on the subway and went to work.
And I was, I don't know, maybe an hour and a half's walk from home, maybe a 15-minute bus ride, and I had no money.
My mom had left me.
I was 12, I think.
My mom had left me with no money.
She had no money, couldn't get home.
I mean, normally an hour and a half walk wouldn't be the end of the world, but I had all my bags, right?
Right? Was it an option for me to steal the money?
Was it an option for me to steal the money?
It was not. That wasn't an option.
So I didn't steal the money.
So what I did was I asked a bunch of strangers for a quarter saying I didn't have money to get home.
And I still remember the guy had a nice beard and he was in a hurry.
He gave me a quarter. Well, obviously with the look of suspicion, right?
But fine, he gave me the quarter, I put the quarter in the bus, and I went home.
Stealing wasn't an option, so I didn't steal.
Abuse is not an option, so I don't abuse.
It's not that complicated. You just take it off the table.
But if you say, ah, well, you see, but my mother, ah, you know, she abused because she was abused and then she abused you, you're just giving yourself permission.
I can't do anything about the child abuse that happened to you other than sympathize with it, but we sure as shit can do something about the child abuse to come, which is to remove all possible justifications for it.
And removing all possible justifications for child abuse removes all possible justifications for those who abused you.
Right? Right? The more you excuse your parents' abuse, the more liable you are to abuse your children.
I'm trying to protect you, not your parents.
And if protecting you and your future children means making your parents upset, well, maybe they shouldn't have been child abusers.
Sorry. It's just the way it is.
And they knew they shouldn't have been child abusers because they didn't abuse in public anyway.
I'm not inflicting some morality on them that they had no idea about because they didn't do it in public anyway.
I'm just agreeing with them.
Yes, it was bad. Yes, it was wrong.
But my focus is on the future kids.
Protect the innocent. If protecting the innocent means upsetting the guilty...
Well, that's the job as a moral philosopher.
Protect the innocent. Promote virtue.
You've protected thousands of children, Steph.
Oh, millions by now. But I appreciate that.
Thank you. Yeah, millions of children.
I know that statistically. Millions of children have been not abused because of what I've done and what we've done and what you've supported.
And I hope that you're proud of this.
I know I am. But I hope you are as well.
That your support... Makes all of this possible, which saves millions of children worldwide.
Millions. Well, it's a team effort.
Straight up, it's a team effort.
Why do you think people got so mad at me?
He talked about IQ.
No, it's nothing to do with that.
Just look at one of the news executives who worked very hard to debunk Pizzagate.
Look what happened to him. What he got caught with.
Well, it's all pretty boring.
I've talked about this years ago, years before.
I mean, why do people get mad at people who aim to protect children?
This is not that complicated.
All right, so let me...
It's funny, you know. It's a light tipping day, and for those of you who have tipped, I really, really appreciate it.
For those of you who haven't, you know that you can't get this anywhere else.
You know how much this liberates the world.
You know, I see people giving literally hundreds of millions of dollars to politicians.
It's pretty wild. All right, let me get to...
Steph, I work part-time in a restaurant.
Everyone over 30 is a lunatic besides the owner.
We get bad reviews because of them.
Why is it people over 30 in restaurants are batshit crazy?
Because they're living opposite lives.
Anybody who works in hospitality is working when everyone else is relaxing.
So they tend to be rebellious, socially deviant, in good or bad ways.
And also, it tends to be...
People who don't plan for their future, which tends to be more chaotic people and more hedonistic people and so on, right?
A restaurant is fine when you're young, but you don't really want to be...
I mean, unless you're like a...
I don't know if you're like some Gordon Ramsay professional chef or something, that's one thing, but, you know, people who are like busboys and waiters over 30, it's like, well, that's not a very good planned life, right?
All right. Let me just see here.
Gee, I cannot find. I cannot find whoever said that they tipped.
All right. So if you...
Oh, somebody says...
Joe says, I've been working at a company for eight months.
I have a colleague that is the same rank as me in the company.
I'm getting the feeling he's starting to get threatened by my growing influence.
What are some tips to deal with the situation?
I donated but not tipped.
Oh, sorry about that. And I appreciate that.
Sorry. Even though I mentioned it, that's my bad.
Even though I mentioned it, I did not check.
So thank you. I appreciate that.
And remember, on Rumble you can tip as well.
Just use the app there.
Starting to get threatened by my growing influence.
Somebody says, okay, let me just get this.
So, growing influence. Let me ask you this.
Are you...
Let's see here, Joe.
I'm going to assume you're a male. Just hit me with an N if you're not a male.
But if you're a male, virtue is combat.
Yeah, so virtue is combat.
Which means you have to win and he has to lose.
So you don't try and bring him along.
You don't try and raise him with you.
You don't try to do any of that stuff.
If he's threatened by your growing influence, if you're doing better at work than he is, then you need to win decisively.
And I've faced this a bunch of times in the working world.
And you have to be pretty ruthless about this stuff.
You don't have sympathy. You don't try to accommodate.
You don't try to appease. You don't try to help him along.
If you're in a win-lose...
Look, I want win-win situations.
Absolutely, I want win-win situations as much as possible.
That's what we aim for.
That's where good things are in the world.
But if you're starting to emerge into or engage into a win-lose situation, the only solution is for you to win and the other person to lose.
You don't define the win-lose situation, but once you're in there, you've got to look at him like you are both...
Playing tennis for a million dollars.
How do you get the million dollars?
You win and he loses.
You win and he loses.
So, you share less information with him.
You work more to create alliances with people.
You work more to get better credibility with people.
And if he gets bitchy or passive aggressive with you in meetings, You provoke him until he blows up and gets fired.
These are all things that I've done in the past.
I try to look for win-win situations as much as possible, but I'm telling you, man, if we're in a win-lose situation, if you create in me a win-lose situation, then I will aim to win using every ethical means necessary, and I will aim for you to lose.
If you create a win-lose situation, I will aim to win and have you lose.
I'd love it if it was a win-win situation, then we can both enjoy it and have a great time.
But if somebody is like, well, your success is my failure, it's like, okay, but if that's the case, then I'm going to make sure you fail.
Be as nice to people as you can the first time you meet them.
After that, treat them as they treat you.
And I guarantee you, someone passive-aggressive who's threatened by your success is going to start undermining you.
He's going to start bitching about you.
He's going to start spreading rumors about you.
He's going to get all that stuff going.
That's just the way it is. And for men in particular, sometimes for women too, but for men in particular, virtue be combat.
Virtue be combat. All right, let's get...
Karakarin says, Steph, this is very freeing.
How can I tell if emotional reactions are merely trauma responses, a result of being triggered, leading to misunderstandings, and therefore require further introspection, apologies, and perhaps seeking out therapy again, versus when they are the result of legitimate grievances, frustrations, etc.?
All right, that's a good question.
Hit me with a why if this is something of interest to you as a whole.
Hit me with a why if this question...
You get emotionally upset...
Is it triggering from your past or is it something real?
Alright, well we'll spend a few minutes on this and see if that gets me some more tips.
It's a low tip day, just so you know.
Some of you have tipped and I really, really appreciate that.
Some of you donated. I appreciate that as well.
All right. How do you know if it's a genuine emotional response or being triggered from trauma?
See, what you're doing there is you're dividing your emotional apparatus into true and false, good and bad, right and wrong.
Don't do that. Don't do that.
Extreme emotional reactions are not wrong, they're just heightened.
So let's say that you grew up very sensitive to being humiliated and then someone at work humiliates you and you get really angry.
Doesn't mean they didn't humiliate you, just means you have a very strong reaction because of your past experience with humiliation.
Let's say that you were raised with somebody who's really passive-aggressive and bitchy and weird that way.
They don't have direct conflicts with you.
They just provoke you until you get angry and then claim to be the victim and manipulate you that way, all that sort of crap.
Okay, so then someone starts passively, aggressively manipulating you at work.
You get angry about it.
Your anger will be stronger.
Doesn't mean it's wrong. Doesn't mean it's wrong.
Now the most genuine feelings we have are the ones that arise from empiricism, not language.
Now, of course, unfortunately, because of the prevalence of art, and people these days seem to consume more manufactured reality than real reality, like video games and movies and so on, people consume more manufactured reality than real reality, so language and empiricism have been really blurred in our minds.
And, of course, in the past this was, you know, Beowulf and Grendel and storytelling and so on, but it's really, really common now.
So if you've directly experienced it in the real world, it's going to be authentic.
If it's something that has been programmed into you by repeated exposure to manipulative media, it's less likely to be real.
Or, to put it another way, your body has confused manipulation for empiricism because you have to suspend disbelief to consume art.
Suspending disbelief is also failing to...
Remember that you're being propagandized and programmed.
So if it's a direct result of your empirical experience, I would accept it as true.
That doesn't mean that the level of it is accurate.
But the purpose of trauma...
Okay, do you know what the purpose of emotional trauma is?
Why do we have it?
Because we look at it as dysfunctional and problematic and so on.
Why do we have... Emotional trauma.
What is it trying to do? How is it trying to help us?
It has to be trying to help us, otherwise we wouldn't have evolved to have it, right?
Yeah, to avoid stuff in the future.
So, like, to take an example, let's say that you are a deer or, I don't know, a springbok or an antelope in the bush veils in Africa, right?
Sort of high, dry grasses, right?
Now, let's say that the grass is waving a little, you hear a crack or two, but you don't run, and then you almost die because a lion jumps on your ass, right?
Okay. So, the reason that we get hyperacuity based on trauma is because we missed the indications last time.
We missed the indications last time.
So you have to sharpen and heighten your responses because your lack of awareness, your lack of situational awareness almost got you killed last time.
We're just talking about the antelope, right?
So then the antelope obviously is terrified of the lion biting his ass off, but what the trauma does is it says you need to be hypervigilant on the waving of the grass and the cracking of the twig Because last time you didn't pay attention to that and it almost got you killed.
So, if you grew up with mean or abusive parents, then you have to be hypersensitive to, hyper-aware, hyper-acute, hyper-vigilance, they call it, hyper-vigilance.
You have to be hypersensitive to danger cues so that you don't get killed.
Because remember, child abuse throughout most of our evolution carried with it Death threats.
Like murder threats. Like, we will end you.
We will kill you. I brought you into this world, I can take you out.
And this is all the stuff I talked about back in the day in Australia, with regard to the Aborigines.
They'd kill 40% of their babies.
They're pouring sand in their mouth and things like that.
So, yeah, displeasing your parents meant dying.
So we become hyper-aware, hyper-vigilant towards things which threaten our survival.
And if you're kind of distracted and thinking about yourself or daydreaming or whatever, your parent gets really angry, then that's like not paying attention to the waving grass and the crack of the twig and then you almost die from the lion biting your ass.
So when our parents are home, we're hyper-aware, hyper-vigilant because we don't want to get killed.
And again, I'm not saying that your parents would kill you, I'm just saying that we evolved that way.
So, it feels like, gosh, I'm nervous around people I shouldn't be nervous around.
How do you know? Things that are negative towards your interest.
So that's, it's not...
Not just trauma, that's to indicate that it's dysfunctional, weird or bad or whatever, right?
It's situational awareness based on imminent and extreme danger.
Now, of course, you do want to try and get into a situation where you're not facing the kind of wild and extreme dangers that you were in the past.
So you want to try and get to a place of safety.
If you can't tell where the lion is, maybe don't graze in the deep grass.
Graze on the open field where the grass is unable to hide lions.
You get to a place of safety.
So your trauma is trying to get you to a place of safety where you don't have to be hypervigilant all the time.
So the trauma will apply negative stimuli to you when you're in danger.
And then when you get to a place of safety, your trauma will proceed because it's done its job.
It's got you to safety. Does that make sense?
Tell me if that makes sense to you.
Good, good. All right.
Thank you everyone so much for listening and coming by today.
I can't believe we did almost two hours.
Somebody says, thank you so much.
It does. I have siblings who were gaslighting me and I wanted to make sure I'm making the right call distancing myself.
Anyone you can't tell the truth to is trying to wreck your life.
They're trying to destroy your life. They're trying to substitute their aggression for your judgment, their lies for your truth.
It's an infection. There was a study that just came out.
I posted this at freedomain.locals.com, which you should really join if you haven't.
It's free. About how if you're around people who are mentally ill, you also become mentally ill.
Like craziness. My mom used to say in a very not funny joke, insanity is hereditary.
We get it from our kids.
When, of course, I was trying to infect her with sanity and reason, and that battle was underway for 15 years straight.
Well, maybe 10 years straight.
But if people threaten you for telling the truth, they're trying to destroy your life.
Like, it's a grim battle, in many ways, almost to the death.
So yes, freedomain.com forward slash donate to help out the show.
Please don't forget my free books.
Gosh, they're great. JustPornNovel.com.
AlmostNovel.com. And check out, we're going to go live today with the new books page, freedomain.com slash books, so that you can more easily get my fiction, which I'm very proud of.
Go to freedomain.locals.com to get my novels, The Future and The Present, which are also just great.
Joe's tipping! Give me a minute, Joe!
I will give you a minute. But no more...
Oh, maybe you mean give you a minute.
Give you a minute. How about a minute bicep?
There we go. Thanks for the show, Steph, and to the chat.
Hang in there, guys. We got this.
Thank you, Tulio. That is a great name, by the way.
Tulio is a great name.
It makes me want tapas.
So, all right. If you're still tipping, I will wait for a second.
What else? Yeah, Peaceful Parenting Books coming along well.
Thanks to Jared for all the great research.
When is the next show? The next show will be, what is it, Tuesday today?
Yeah, the next show is tomorrow night, Wednesday Night Live, 7 p.m.
Eastern Standard Time. It'll be the same kind of format.
Yeah, it's funny, you know, because I've been working now for four or five hours, really highly concentrated intellectual labor.
It's funny, I can just feel when it just goes away.
It just drains.
And it's like, oh, I was smart for a bit, and now I'm not.
It's just, I can feel it.
Just like, ah. Just gone.
Just gone. Thank you, Steph.
See you next time. Can you get a lightning address?
Wallet or Satoshi, for example.
I'll think about it. So excited about the upcoming book.
Going to send it to everyone I know.
I'm not sure how much of it's going to need to be redacted.
I'm not entirely sure about that.
But some parts of it are going to have to be redacted for sure.
All right. Well, I'm just kidding. It's going to have to go through some edits to take out some of the frothy rage that I'm currently intellectually surfing and coasting on.
Well, that's what happens when you write a book while pumping iron.
It gets your T-levels through the roof.
All right. Thank you everyone so much.
Have yourself a wonderful afternoon.
Any spicy unreleased shows?
Yeah, I did one on the weekend.
Poor woman. I had to stay.
She could only start the conversation at 11.30 at night, and I basically talked to her until after 2, but I think I'll have to keep that not out.
All right. It was just too grim.
So have yourselves a wonderful evening, afternoon, evening, and I will talk to you guys tomorrow night, 7 p.m.