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April 11, 2022 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux

01:51:59

TRUTH IS NOT BEAUTY! Freedomain Call In

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	Yo, yo, everybody.
	Good afternoon. It's...
	You know what? I'm not even telling you anymore.
	That's it. I'm not telling anyone who it is.
	I'm now going to be known as the man with no name.
	Like the horse with no name, but not as annoying.
	So, yeah, I hope you guys are having a nice afternoon slash evening.
	And thank you so much for dropping past.
	And thank you so much, of course, for your continued support of the greatest philosophy conversation known to man throughout all of human history, mostly driven by the brilliance of the listener questions and the occasional spark of thought from yours truly.
	So I hope you're having a lovely afternoon.
	Welcome, of course, to Ohio, of course, to all of the lovely people out in Europe, out in Europe.
	And I hope you guys are having a great evening as well.
	Where do we drop comments for live?
	Well, that would... In the desert, you can remember your name.
	That is an annoying song.
	I mean, don't get me wrong.
	Neil Young, an annoying guy just in general, but that gas-lit helium voice is really something else.
	Philadelphia was an okay song, I suppose.
	Other than that, it's been how long since he had any kind of success in the music world?
	What can I say?
	And what was it the guy from Coldplay was saying how he started getting the song Yellow, that he was just goofing around at the microphone, making fun of Neil Young, when it was all yellow.
	That's how he got that song going, and that, what God, his 20-year career, I guess, going.
	But, yeah, that's just a little bit of music trivia for you there.
	De Commissar is in town.
	Yeah, that guy. Is that Falco?
	Rock me Amadeus guy?
	Was that De Commissar? Yes, I think so.
	Yeah, he had a pretty tragic end.
	An addict and died in a car crash in some tropical hellhole.
	Anyway. So, yeah.
	I just wanted to remind you, this is not a pitch.
	Not a pitch. Because it's free.
	But you can go to almostnovel.com and justpoornovel.com to get my free novels.
	Really, really, really, you owe it to yourself.
	This is, I mean, it's great literature.
	It really is. And if you want to know, it's funny because the difference between these two novels is about six or seven years in terms of writing.
	And I actually have a novel called Revolutions that was my first honest-to-goodness.
	Well, I wrote a novel when I was in my late teens called The Jealous War about the First World War.
	And I think that exists somewhere on an Atari 520ST disc, somewhere in my house.
	But it was pretty good, but a bit scattered.
	Then I tried not writing a novel about boarding school, and I got about halfway through before I ran out of steam.
	And then my first real novel was Revolutions, about Sergei Nikayev and Alexander Kyrtsin, or Herzen, as it would be spelled.
	And it was... How do you make the world a better place?
	Do you go into ideology or do you go into a family and love?
	These were what I was really wrestling with and I'm very glad that that novel helped me find the right answer.
	So I'll probably read that as an audiobook at some point over the next year or two because I have a great affection for that.
	It's my first real piece of good writing.
	I think good, solid writing. Writing and characterization.
	It's funny because I was actually in theater school when I was working on that and one of the things that I found really helpful to unlock the characters for me, I mean this is very obscure, but one of the things I found really helpful to unlock the characters for me was to figure out what paintings they would paint as children and then paint those paintings.
	Because, you know, children have different ways of expressing themselves.
	Painting is a very vivid way of expressing yourself and so I tried to figure out For each character, what would they paint when they were 6 years old and 10 years old?
	And I just recreated those.
	It really helped me get into the mindset of the characters.
	These are little tricks that you can use to unlock your creativity.
	So that's my little tip for you if you're an artist.
	Just try and figure all of that stuff out.
	Okay, so what have we got here?
	We've got a brilliant question, but where is it?
	Where is the question?
	If my experiences are part of my mind and my mind is inside my head, how can I know about anything outside my head, i.e.
	my hand? If I need to experience it and my experiences are only inside my head?
	Radical subjectivism for the win.
	No, that's a good question. It's a great question.
	It's really a foundational philosophy question, right?
	So the foundational question of philosophy is what is true.
	Then the most important question, so the foundational question of philosophy is what is true.
	The most important question of philosophy is what is moral.
	Because science answers what is true.
	Biology, of course, answers what is true.
	And engineering answers what is true.
	Is it true that this bridge will stand up?
	But only philosophy answers what is good, what is moral, what is right in the world.
	And that's the differentiator.
	But what you're asking is a very important question because we can't know what is right until we know what is true.
	And there have been a bunch of romantics, not the big-haired new romantics of the 80s, but romanticism is the idea that beauty and morality are conjoined.
	Beauty and morality are co-joined.
	This is the truth.
	All you need to know that beauty is truth and truth is beauty.
	And that way you can turn virtue into You can turn virtue into something that is aesthetic.
	In other words, here's something very pretty.
	Wow, I really experience how pretty and beautiful this thing is, therefore I'm a virtuous person.
	And the great desperate quest of philosophy, it's a false quest, but the great desperate quest of philosophy is this.
	Try to give people a way of feeling virtuous without angering the evildoers.
	This is the very, very big question.
	It's the false hope.
	Of philosophy, the will of the wisp, as they say in Dungeons and Dragons and ancient Irish mythology, the will of the wisp is the light that you follow, the dancing light that you follow into a swamp to your death.
	And everybody wants to feel good.
	Everyone wants to feel moral.
	And there's no better way to feel good than feeling moral.
	Everybody wants to feel good by being moral.
	But the problem is that feeling good by being moral angers evildoers who will then try and mess up your life in pretty horrendous ways, right?
	So, the Romantics said, if I weep copious tears of subjugated beauty appreciation before the bust of David by Michelangelo, I have somehow contributed to the virtue of the world.
	And the statue of Michelangelo Sorry, the statue by Michelangelo of David is absolutely stunningly beautiful and huge, by the way, way larger than a person.
	It's a couple of times the size of a person, for sure.
	It's big and it's beautiful and it's noble and so on.
	It was a Brad Pitt and Fight Club before that was a thing.
	And it's wonderful to appreciate beauty.
	Beauty is one of the reasons we live.
	But it's a way of saying, when I experience something profound and positive, that's the same as achieving virtue in the world.
	And it's just not true.
	Again, I'm not saying don't experience positive and beautiful things in the world.
	The aforementioned novels, which are available for free, is audiobooks, ePubs, read online, do what you like.
	They're beautiful things, and I spent years creating those beautiful things.
	So the creation of beautiful things, the appreciation of beautiful things, being moved to tears by beautiful things is a wonderful part of life.
	And nobody should forego or avoid those experiences.
	But by making a subjective experience which harms the interests of no evildoers in this world, by making that the definition of virtue, it turns aesthetic appreciation into a virtue.
	In other words, you get to feel like you're virtuous because you're loving the sunset.
	And loving the sunset doesn't harm the interests of any evil people, therefore you get to feel virtuous without any danger.
	And isn't that what we want?
	We want the feeling of achievement without any danger.
	That's video games. There's other ways to achieve a sense of achievement without risk, right?
	And you can buy an artificial girlfriend to feel like you have a girlfriend without the risk of rejection or actually having to win over a woman.
	So, getting the effects without the cause.
	Is the great addiction, right?
	And everybody is desperate for a thinker who will give them a sense of virtue without putting them in any danger.
	Which is why so many thinkers attack Christianity, right?
	It's very cowardly to attack a religion that commands its followers to love their enemies, right?
	There's no danger in that, right?
	Other religions, a little more punchy.
	Christianity, not so much, right?
	So then you get to feel like you're fighting superstition and going against irrationality and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right?
	And yet you're in no danger whatsoever.
	Criticizing Christians is about the safest and really the most cowardly thing that you can do these days because Christians won't band together to mess up your life.
	And so that's one of the sort of the big sort of backdrop behind this.
	Now, so let's get back to the sort of question at hand, right?
	If my experiences, this listener asks, if my experiences Are a part of my mind.
	And my mind is inside my head.
	How can I know about anything outside my head, i.e.
	my hand? If I need to experience it, then my experiences are only inside my head.
	Alright? So, first question of philosophy, what is true?
	Most important question of philosophy, what is moral?
	Most effective methodology is, compared to what?
	If you don't have a comparison, well, it's kind of solipsistic, right?
	Like if you don't have a comparison, you're not doing anything other than mental masturbation, right?
	So what is true compared to what?
	Well, what is false? What is moral compared to what?
	Well, what is immoral? So if you don't have a compared to what, it's, you know, the old philosophy professor, somebody said, how's your wife?
	And he said, compared to what?
	It's an important question. If you're 80, You can be in great health relative to another 80-year-old, but you're probably not in great health relative to a 20-year-old.
	Compared to what? So when you say, my experience is a part of my mind, and my mind is inside my head, you say, okay, compared to what?
	Now, without a doubt, there are some experiences that are inside your head.
	No question. The most common example we all experience every day, and you should really just appreciate just how incredible this is.
	The first example, of course, is dreaming at night.
	When you dream at night, you can fly, you go back in time, you meet and converse with people long dead, you meet the children you never had, you don't meet the children you did have.
	Anything can happen. It's a real wild card, right?
	Anything can happen. So nightly dreams are occurring inside your head.
	How do we know that? Because you lie down in bed and you get up in the same bed with no indication of travel, no soreness of muscles, you're doing things that are physically impossible in the real world and of course if you were to set up a camera filming yourself all night, you would see yourself lying in bed and not flying over a jungle in the Jurassic era, right? Whatever it is that you're dreaming of, right?
	So you know for sure that these things are occurring inside your head.
	Now, they don't occur solely inside your head.
	We don't know what the dreams would be like if somebody born blind, deaf, and dumb.
	I don't know if Helen Keller ever discussed these things, but what we see in our dreams is what we have experienced in the world, right?
	So people born in the Amazon jungle dream about the Amazon jungle, I assume, or mythologies or stories that they heard when they were younger.
	People born, the Inuit dream of snow and igloos and whales and seals and all the polar bears and so on, right?
	So Our dreams are a sort of scrambled up mishmash with usually moral instruction or at least instruction on authenticity assembled by our unconscious to help us guide our way through life.
	So they come from the empirical world, but they are not in the empirical world.
	So the things that occur directly inside your mind, like I mentioned the other day, I was working up north and had to sit there for an hour in the snow while someone had to go back to the tent to get some drill bits or something like that.
	And I went through an entire album in my mind.
	And I, you know, after a while you could almost hear it clearly, if that makes sense, but of course I knew that there wasn't any real music playing.
	If you have tinnitus, then you hear a high-pitched whine in your ear, but it doesn't come from any external source, which you can test, of course, by doing recordings and asking other people if they hear it, or seeing if you can see the Vibrations on an oscilloscope or whatever it's going to be, right?
	So you have things that are subjective in your mind, and especially if you've ever experimented with something like conscious dreaming, vivid dreaming, dreaming where you try to take control.
	My daughter's very good at that by all reports.
	I can't remember what it's called, but if there's something that You can take control in your dreams, then you can know that it's not a totally objective thing that is going on, right?
	So, all of that is ways that you can say, there's stuff that goes on directly in my mind, although it is derived from the external world.
	Like, have you ever dreamt of anything that you have never experienced, right?
	That's kind of a big question, right?
	Have you ever dreamt of anything that you have never experienced?
	And this is something I read in a book, Invasion of the Body Snatchers, from many years ago, where somebody said, you know, we don't really invent anything new.
	We just assemble things, like a dragon is a big lizard with the wings of a bird or of a bat or something like that.
	And, you know, we see fire.
	We know that fire gets bigger when you blow on it, so the idea of fire breath comes from that.
	And so we don't, you know, a unicorn is just a horse with a...
	Horn on its head, you know, that kind of stuff, right?
	A mermaid is just a human, usually a well-endowed human female with the legs and tail of a fish.
	So we don't really come up with anything new.
	We just kind of scramble and reassemble and all that kind of stuff.
	So there's stuff that is directly subjective to your mind, although it still comes in from the empirical outside world.
	And then there is stuff that is in the empirical outside world, but our experience of it is subjective, right?
	So there's internal, purely subjective things like dreams.
	And then there are objective things with subjective experiences.
	So if you are a...
	I don't know. Let's see here. Yeah, okay.
	So you bought some lottery tickets and you are watching the lottery ball, the power ball or whatever it is that's going on, right?
	You're watching all of that. And, you know, there are two guys in the same room.
	And they both have lottery tickets, right?
	Now, those two guys, if one of them wins and one of them loses, they're going to have very different experiences of that, right?
	The guy who wins is going to be super happy that he's won, and the guy who's lost is going to experience both loss, sadness, greed, and envy, right?
	Lost sadness because he's lost, and envy because his friend won, and greed because maybe his friend will give him some money from his winnings, right?
	Now, They are both experiencing the same objective thing, which is the numbers rolling off the lottery machine, right?
	They're both experiencing the same objective thing, but they are having opposite subjective experiences, right?
	So the objectivity translates into subjectivity.
	And then there is objectivity, so pure subjectivity, objectivity which translates into subjectivity, which is your subjective experience of objective things, and then there's objective experiences of objective things.
	So if you're standing out with your friend in the rain, it's raining, and you're both getting wet.
	So that is an objective experience of an objective thing, right?
	So we've got dreams, subjective, subjective.
	We've got emotions, subjective, objective.
	And then we have sensations, so to speak, objective, objective.
	Now, you could, of course, invent scenarios where somebody's paralyzed, they have no sense of feeling, and blah, blah, blah.
	But we're talking about The general human experience, right?
	So objective, objective is if you and your friend both put your hand into the fire, into a fire, you will both experience pain and be burned.
	That is not a subjective experience.
	That's not like, yeah, I won the lottery or oh, I'm sad, I didn't win the lottery.
	That is an objective experience.
	You both put your hands into the fire, you will both experience pain, and you will both get burned.
	So, these are three broad categories, right?
	Subjective-subjective dreams, subjective-objective emotions, and then objective-objective sensations.
	Now, you may be able to consciously control your dreams.
	You may be able to talk yourself in and out of various emotions, and part of maturity, part of wisdom, is learning that you can, not only you can, but you should.
	Talk yourself in and out of various emotions.
	Right? I mean, if you don't get something you want, then that may be good for you, it may be bad for you.
	Right? It may be good for you, it may be bad for you.
	So when I was younger, I wanted to be an actor.
	And you can, of course, hear my acting chops in my audiobook readings, the novels, right?
	And I'm listening back and it's like, it's pretty good, man.
	It's pretty good. It's pretty passionate, pretty powerful.
	You know, when a character is crying, I weep.
	I mean, it's pretty on, especially my writing, my sort of passionate topics.
	So I wanted to be an actor.
	Now, for various reasons, I did not pursue that and that was disappointing to me at the time.
	But it turned out to be much better for me in the long run.
	I won't sort of go into all the reasons.
	It has to do with communist takeover of the arts.
	It has to do with, you know, like, don't hire white men.
	It's a wide variety. It turned out to be better.
	And one of the things that you learn as you get older is it's really hard to tell what's good and what's bad in your life.
	I mean, it's really hard to tell what's good and what's bad.
	Because as things play out, things can get reversed in very interesting ways.
	All the women where either they said no to going out with me or the relationship didn't work out.
	And usually, I don't mean to pat myself on the back.
	It's just a factual statement. Not that you can verify it, but you can trust me or not, I suppose.
	But usually it was me who was breaking up.
	So there was something that the relationship that wasn't working for me.
	So all the women who said no to me and all the women I broke up with led me to my wife.
	Now, if a woman said no to me, if I'd asked her out and she'd say no to me, that felt bad.
	The breakups weren't fun, but they were fantastic in hindsight, right?
	So you can talk yourself in and out of emotions.
	You can say, if a woman says no to you, you can say, that means I'm not worth as much, or you can say, that means she doesn't appreciate value.
	And each one of those interpretations is going to give you a different emotional experience.
	So you can, if you can consciously control your dreams, you can direct them.
	And some people are pretty good at this.
	Again, my daughter says that she's very good at it, and I believe her.
	And you can talk yourself in and out of emotions to some degree.
	But you cannot talk yourself in and out of sensations.
	In other words, you can't put your hand and keep your hand in a fire assuming that your nervous system is operational and not experience pain and burning.
	You can be criticized by somebody and you can be criticized by very powerful people and you can say this means I'm bad or you can say this means that power is corrupt.
	Right? So you can change your dreams, and your dreams will change anyway, right?
	And you can also change your dreams through self-knowledge.
	I used to have, as I mentioned before, I used to have these dreams where a giant wave would hit me, like a tsunami 200 feet high would hit me and smash me apart.
	I remember once my arm got ripped off and went flying like a leg of lamb out into the water, and then there would be this stillness.
	And once I accepted the power of philosophy, those dreams stopped.
	I used to have dreams, which I think most people do, about going to a university, taking a class, never really going, it being too late to drop, never wanting to go and find out how far I was behind, never really figuring out whether the exam was or where the exam was, and just those feelings of unease, right?
	But once I really took on the major and important intellectual fights in the world, Which was the exam.
	Can I be good? Then those dreams went away.
	So you can even alter your dreams through a process of self-knowledge and accepting things.
	Dreams present you the consequences of that which is unacceptable to you and you just have to open your mind to be more acceptable of things and more accepting of things and the dreams will change.
	So you can obviously change your subjective experiences.
	You can also not dream by staying awake all night, right?
	And you don't have the dreams at all.
	So you can...
	You have control, to some degree, usually in an indirect way over your nightly dreams.
	You have some control over your emotions.
	And you can see this, of course, with religious people, very religious people, whose child dies.
	It's an unbelievably awful thing, of course, for any parent to go through.
	And the way that some of the religious people deal with is, my child is now with God and we will meet again.
	She's looking down on me from on high, and she wants me to have a happy life.
	And that is a way of reframing the death of a child, that, you know, God called her home, God had other plans, blah, blah, blah.
	Sorry, I don't mean to say blah, blah, blah.
	That's a very disrespectful way to talk about such deep and abiding grief.
	I'm sorry for that. That was flippant.
	That is a reframing, where they then experience sorrow rather than shock, horror, grief, and rage.
	And sorrow may be a better way of easing themselves into the next phase of their life.
	And you can see this reframing happening all the time.
	All the time, this reframing is happening.
	There was an article that came out recently that said, in divorce, it's not necessarily a failure.
	It can be viewed as a success.
	And it's like, no, no, it's a failure.
	All of the relationships, like the romantic relationships that I had that ended, were all failures because the goal of getting into the relationship was to have it not end, right?
	It wasn't like I went in saying, oh, this is only going to last three months and then we're going to have a breakup or whatever, right?
	You go in with optimism. So, you can have indirect control over your dreams, you can have some control over your emotional responses, but you cannot have control, you have no control over your sensations.
	Now, again, your sensations you might be able to manage, right?
	There are psychological approaches to pain management if you have chronic pain, where you can find ways to distract yourself from it or deal with it in some manner or whatever.
	And you have some...
	But you cannot... You cannot...
	Directly control sensations.
	And you cannot directly control the effects of that which is outside your mind.
	Right? So, if, like me, you're half Irish, half German, if you spend the entire day out in the sunshine without any sunscreen, you're going to get a sunburn.
	I'm going to get a sunburn.
	I can't control that. I can't will that to not happen.
	Right? If you drop an anvil on your foot...
	It's going to mash your toes.
	It's going to break your skin.
	It's going to hurt your foot. Now, you might be able to manage the pain and all associated with that and so on, but you cannot control the physical effects of objective reality.
	You cannot control the physical effects of objective reality.
	You can avoid them, like I can stay in the shade, I can wear sunscreen, blah, blah, blah.
	I've got this big old Tilly hat to keep the sun off my head and neck.
	So, that's, I think, a really important thing to understand.
	Nature to be commanded must be obeyed.
	This used to be common knowledge, but in radical subjectivism these days, which is also known as a hyper-female perspective, because women can control resources through their emotions, but we have to use our bodies to control resources.
	Because women can get resources by crying.
	Women can get resources by complaining.
	Women can get resources by nagging.
	Women can get resources by being physically attractive or offering up sex or romance or the illusion of love for some people.
	So women can get resources through their emotions.
	So women's perspective on the world tends to be less objective.
	And there's nothing wrong with that. It's simply a reality of the world that they live in.
	But, you know, everybody walks around a crying man.
	Everybody stops to help a crying woman, right?
	Men, we have to deal with objective reality to get the resources that we provide to women and children, so we just have to be focused on a stronger delineation.
	So for women, the first subjective-subjective is important, the second subjective-objective is important, but the third objective-objective is less relevant.
	It's not unimportant, because they have to know whether they got the resources or not, but it's just less relevant.
	Whereas for men, in general, subjective-subjective is less important, Subjective-objective is somewhat important and objective-objective is super important.
	That's just the reality of how these things go.
	It's just the facts of the matter.
	And you have to learn to love this difference if you're going to be married to a woman, if you're going to have a woman in your life.
	You have to just learn to love this difference.
	The sensitivity that women have to the emotional space is a beautiful thing.
	The rationality that men have to the Objective space is a beautiful thing.
	So how do you know?
	How do you know what is coming in from outside your mind?
	And how do you know what is within your mind?
	Can you control it?
	Can you control it?
	I don't know if you ever did this.
	So I grew up as a kid.
	I was born in 66.
	I grew up as a kid in the 70s.
	And the 70s was going through a crazy mystical time.
	Like, really crazy mystical time.
	Alan Parsons makes fun of this in one of his albums.
	And the Mayan panoramas on my pyramid pajamas haven't solved my little problem, you know?
	And it was a really subjective time.
	And, you know, massive, like, mystical UFOs, not like rational UFOs.
	And let me just get the lyrics for this, because the song is kind of interesting, and it's sung in a kind of girly falsetto.
	The Mayan...
	Let me just get these lyrics.
	I won't sing it to you that high, because I can't, right?
	In panoramas on my...
	It's on the album Pyramid, but it's been a while.
	It's a really, really good album.
	Oh, yes, that's right.
	You have got me into a song.
	Yeah, I got some philosophy from Alan Parsons.
	Oh yeah, Pyromania.
	There are pyramids in my head, there's one underneath my bed, and my lady's getting cranky.
	Every possible location has a simple explanation, and it isn't Hanky Panky.
	I have read somewhere in a book, they improve all your food and your wine.
	It is said that everything you grow in your garden would taste pretty fine.
	Instead, all I ever get is a pain in the neck and a yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap.
	I've consulted all the sages I could find in the Yellow Pages, but there aren't many of them, and the Mayan panoramas on my pyramid pajamas haven't helped my little problem.
	I've been told someone in the know can be sure that his luck is as good as gold.
	Money in the bank and you don't even pay for it if you fold a dollar in the shape of the pyramid that's printed on the back.
	It's no lie. You can keep the edge of a razor as sharp as an eagle's eye.
	You can grow a hedge that is vertically straight over ten feet high.
	All you need is a pyramid and just a little luck.
	I have read somewhere in a book they improve all your food and wine, and I've been told someone in the know can be sure of his good luck, and it's no lie.
	All you really need is a little bit of pyramidic help, and it's a really good song.
	I mean, musically it's not great, but it's really clever because it's somebody who's...
	Falling into this. I can remember reading this stuff when I was a kid about, oh yeah, you can keep a razor sharp, you just put it under a pyramid and it'll keep the razor sharp.
	Like it was really, and telekinesis.
	I was actually in the newspaper when I was 13.
	I was in the newspaper for bending spoons with my mind and I really got into this stuff.
	And I remember lying in my bed experimenting with telekinesis.
	My very first 45 record was 10cc, The Things We Do For Love.
	And at the end of it, that's just endless repeat and fade.
	Things we do for love.
	Things we do for love.
	And it just went on and on.
	And it really bothered me that it went on for so long.
	It was like, guys, kind of lazy.
	Just write another verse for God's sakes.
	And I remember lying in my bed trying to lift up the needle with my brain.
	I don't know if you tried any of this, but I was curious, right?
	This is what was out there in the world.
	All of this uregella, mind-bending, telekinesis nonsense, and I gave it a good old college try.
	I wanted to see if it worked.
	Of course, I'm an empiricist, right?
	This is what they say works.
	I'm going to see if it works.
	I remember reading about how you could do this and that and the other to summon ghosts, and I did this, that, and the other to summon ghosts, and...
	I really, really gave it a good old shot, and of course none of it.
	None of it ever worked, right?
	None of it ever worked.
	There's a winery in BC that ages wine in a pyramid.
	You know that's funny because it's before Christ, BC, but here you mean British Columbia, of course, right?
	I mean, if everyone around you, or if a lot of people around you are talking about all of these wonderful things that the mind can do, and, you know, I listened to and to some degree believed this complete nonsense that you only use 5% of your mind, you only use 10% of your brain.
	It's like, no, that's not true.
	It's not true. It's like saying, you know, somebody who's Somebody who's curling weights is only using 3% of their muscles.
	It's like, well, yeah, but you can't use all your muscles at the same time.
	That's called a stroke or some sort of epilepsy.
	You can't use all your muscles at the same time.
	Of course, all your brain doesn't light up at the same time.
	How ridiculous would that be?
	So, can you affect it out there in the world?
	The other thing, of course, that you know is that do things occur without you being there?
	So, if you go from one room to the other, and then you go back, you go from your bedroom to your bathroom.
	And then you go from your bathroom back to your bedroom.
	Okay. So, the bedroom isn't visible to you when you are not in the bedroom, but then you can go back to it and it's still there.
	That's independent of your thoughts.
	Of course, in dreams... Right, you leave your bed in dreams, you go to the bathroom, you come back and it's a pit of lava or a geyser or the back of a dragon or some nonsense, right?
	Usually it's not nonsense in dreams, but you know what I mean, right?
	So, can you will, leaving your bathroom, sorry, can you will getting out of bed in the morning, going to the bathroom and coming back in it no longer being your bedroom?
	Can you will that? Can you will that?
	Now, if you have a bad dream and you wake up frightened and then you go to the bathroom, And you think about your dream and you figure out what it's about and it gives you a sense of relief.
	So you can leave your bedroom frightened and you can re-enter your bedroom calmer.
	If you're waiting for a text from a girl you like and you wake up in the morning and You check your phone and she hasn't texted you.
	You go to the bathroom and on the bathroom you see that she suddenly texts you and says she'd love to meet for coffee and your spirits go up.
	So when you wake up, you're unhappy.
	You go to the bathroom and then you return to your bedroom and you're happy.
	That's how you know it's subjective.
	But there's no way to leave your bedroom, go to your bathroom, return to the place you came from and have it not be your bedroom.
	Now, again, I know you're coming up with, what if you've got shells and it's destroyed?
	You know what I'm saying, right?
	Absent any significant intervention, you can't control that.
	Right? You cannot control, like you can choose to jump off a building, but you can't choose, if you jump off a building, you can't choose to not fall.
	Like Flintstones, there's two T's in Flintstones, remember that.
	Anyway, Flintstones, notwithstanding, right?
	So how you know the things that are Not part of your brain is they're universal, they're objective, they're not under your control, they occur independent of your consciousness, and they contain information that you don't have.
	This is how you know somebody else is real, right?
	I was talking to my daughter the other day about the call that I had where somebody said, what would it take for you to believe in God?
	I said, well, some sort of empirical evidence, right?
	And so I said to my daughter, I said, so what empirical evidence would I need to believe in God?
	And it's like, she blows my mind, because she didn't skip a beat.
	Just 13, didn't skip a beat.
	And she said, well, God would need to give you information that you didn't have.
	And I said, yeah, now that would be pretty strong proof.
	What would be absolute proof? Oh, if God gave you information that nobody else had.
	Yep, boom, right there.
	Right there. Right there.
	So... Trying to figure out what is real and what is objective is actually fairly simple.
	And, of course, it's reinforced by every piece of sense data that you have.
	Now, my guess is, you know, just to get psychological for a second, my guess is you're raised by a single mother, had a lot of women around, and, you know, women can use their emotions to get resources, and men can't.
	We have to use our hands.
	We can't just use our...
	Attributes. Whatever you want to call it, right?
	We have to actually use our hands, right?
	Women are human being, right?
	Men are human doing. So I hope that makes some sense.
	I hope that that... Well, actually, I know it makes sense.
	But I hope that's pretty clear.
	And this doesn't have to be a text-based thing.
	But if you want to join in text...
	Oh, we do have...
	Somebody who wants to talk.
	I am more than happy to hear, my friend, what's on your mind.
	Sorry for the long thing, but you've got to unmute.
	You've got to unmute, my friend.
	Yeah. I probably put him to sleep.
	Actually, I shouldn't score on myself.
	That was a great explanation. A great explanation.
	Alright, if there's anybody else who wants to talk, AA? Oh, did I not click on how to speak?
	I thought I did. AA, if you want to unmute, I'm happy to hear.
	Can you hear me? Yes, go ahead, my friend.
	What's up? Oh, great.
	Okay, I want to say first, Stefan, I love your stuff.
	I've been following you for I don't know how many years, several years.
	You've really enlightened me in several different subjects and taught me how to reason.
	So, I really appreciate all that.
	Thank you. Sure.
	So, what I wanted to ask...
	One thing, on the topic you just mentioned, have you ever heard of Rupert Sheldrake and Morphic Resonance?
	I have not. Okay, he wrote a book, The Sense of Being Stared At, and he goes into science of why it's a real phenomena.
	I'm not really certain if it's true or not.
	Oh, do you mean that you think someone's looking at you or someone's watching you?
	And then I definitely had that more when I had a channel on YouTube.
	Boom! Just kidding. Just a little deplatforming joke for you.
	But yeah, I mean, I think you do get that sense, right?
	And I had aunts who would say, if you'd got a body chill, they'd say, oh, that's a goose walking over your grave.
	And it's like, what?
	That's so freaky. Stop, you freaky Irish bog trotters.
	Right? So, no, it is.
	This stuff was all around when I was a kid.
	This low-level rank superstition.
	My mom was really into this mystical, psychic stuff.
	And yeah, it was crazy, crazy stuff.
	Anyway, go on. Sure.
	So, I guess, do you think that could be, I mean, it's, I guess it has to be, you know, empirical proof of that, but that, and then also, like, you think of somebody and they call you and things of that nature.
	Okay, no, these are good things, right?
	These are really, really great questions.
	And, you know, for those, I mean, sure, you know statistics about as well as I do, which is, you know, middling, but...
	We are, you know, we look for these kinds of patterns, right?
	Obviously, we look for these kinds of patterns, and we look for these exceptions to these patterns, right?
	So if you are walking in the woods, and you're looking for food, and then you come across a bush with edible berries, you will remember that, because that's the exception to there not being a bush with edible berries, and it's an exception that helps you and so on.
	And so... You do hear these stories.
	You know, I had a sudden premonition that my sister was hurt and I called and she was in a car crash.
	I mean, you do hear these kinds of stories.
	Now, first of all, my first assumption is that people are lying.
	They're trying to make themselves...
	See, you've got to remember, there aren't that many people in the world who are genuinely interesting and who have something original to offer.
	I think everyone has that potential, but most people are sort of ground down into subservient powder-based propaganda and bots.
	So how do you make yourself different?
	How do you make yourself interesting?
	I have psychic phenomena.
	That's a particularly big one for women, right?
	What do you have to offer?
	Are you wise? Are you learned? Are you great conversationalists?
	Are you funny? No!
	But once I had a premonition that my cat was unwell and I rushed home and yes, it turns out my cat was trapped in the...
	Okay, so what?
	That's supposed to make you interesting because you might cross over to another dimension, another realm.
	So a lot of people are just trying to find ways to be interesting in this world and that's one way.
	So I assume that it's not true.
	But of course, even if it is true, which we have no way of verifying, but even if it is true, so what?
	It's like the people who say, wow, you know, I dreamt that a black cat jumped up on me, and the very next day a black cat jumped up on me.
	Yes, statistically you would expect that to happen probably a dozen times over the course of your life, that you dream about something very specific and it happens the next day.
	Of course, what it doesn't explain is all the times you dream of a black cat jumping up on you and nothing happens the next day, right?
	Or the times where you're worried about someone, you call and they say, no, no, I'm fine.
	Or you don't act on it and you just kind of forget about it, right?
	So the one, you know, women, of course, are a constant low rate state of alarm about everyone, right?
	Like, I mean, if they get a phone call in the middle of the night, it's like, who died?
	Right? I mean, because they take care of the ill and the dying and all of that.
	And women have this, you know, completely legitimate to our evolution, low rent paranoia about everything.
	And that's just why we're alive.
	I don't complain about it.
	I think it's a good thing.
	So they're constantly worried about people and they're constantly having negative thoughts about bad things that could happen to people.
	And, you know, almost every single time those things turn out to be false.
	But, of course, the one time they have the bad thought and it turns out to be true, they're like, oh, goosebumps, you know?
	And so you would simply have to do this in some measurable, reliable way.
	And there have been so many tests.
	I remember I had a girlfriend when I was young who tried to pull this, you know, I have intuition, I have these phenomena, I'm just able to understand things, blah, blah, blah, right?
	And although she was thunderously pretty, I just wasn't, you know, I said, oh my gosh, you know, the amazing Randy has had a million dollars set aside for anyone who can prove psychic phenomenon.
	Let's head down to Vegas and let's take the test, you know, and we'll split the money.
	And she's like, it doesn't work that way.
	It's like, okay, so the moment you try and put any kind of test in, it suddenly mysteriously doesn't work that way, right?
	You can't just will it.
	It just happens, you know?
	It's premonition epilepsy.
	Sorry? That was before we got to the other topic.
	That's what I wanted to ask you. What is wrong with women?
	And what I mean is, for example, their biological function is to reproduce.
	And they fail at that so miserably.
	They wait until their 30s, or they become single mothers, or they have sex with the worst man possible.
	And by chance, if they do get pregnant when they're actually fertile and not going to have an autistic child, they abort the child.
	How have women failed so miserably at the one biological imperative they have in life?
	Are you comparing this to all of the men who are reproducing these days, or are you just singling out the ladies?
	Do you have kids?
	In Tennessee, there's three black guys that have had 100 kids between them.
	Do you have any kids? With all these different single mothers.
	Yes, I have two children, and I'm going to have as many as I can.
	Beautiful. I just wanted to dip into that possible hypocrisy pool, but you passed that with a gold medal, so good for you.
	Congratulations. I understand.
	Trust me, it's a huge sacrifice.
	It costs a ton of money. There's stuff I'd love to do that I can't because I have children.
	It's more difficult, time-consuming, but I love my children.
	You start your day cleaning out a duck cage.
	It's like, yeah, this is hybrid philosophy right here.
	Every day my one and a half year old wakes me up and he puts a book on me and he sits next to me and wants me to read to him, which is adorable even though it's sleep depriving.
	I do it every day. Yeah, because that's the thing.
	Although sometimes it's tough at the moment, you know you're going to hate it when she doesn't do that anymore or he, right?
	Yes, yes, definitely.
	That's what I always remind myself.
	They grow up pretty quick. So yeah, I do have two kids.
	My wife, I have one. The other one's due in two weeks, and we want to have as many as we can.
	Congratulations. That's wonderful.
	You've already out-kidded me, so good for you.
	I'm the hypocrite here, I guess.
	Okay, so I'll give you...
	First of all, we don't want to say old women, right?
	So I understand that. I mean, I know you're just using that in a colloquial way.
	I know. Okay, so...
	There's tall Asian people, but not, you know, there's the average Asian people.
	Can you... Okay, let me ask you this.
	If you're a woman, can you survive in child raising without the approval of the tribe?
	Can you survive in child raising without the approval of the tribe?
	Right. In other words, if all the other women hate you or you're rejected or scorned or whatever, can you survive if you want to have kids?
	Probably not. Probably not because you need resources if you don't have a man or I guess in general.
	Even if you have other women.
	Because the men are up hunting or fighting or whatever, and a lot of times your men might die in the hunt or in the fight, so you need the support of other women to raise your children, right?
	This whole thing, like it takes a village to raise a kid, even though it came out of a Clinton, there's some truth in it, whether we like it or not.
	I think what she meant to say was it takes a village to satisfy my husband, but that's probably another story.
	So for women, reproduction is second to approval.
	Because you can survive with approval yourself, and you can survive and have kids if you're approved of, but you cannot have kids and survive if you are disapproved of, which is why women tend to be very susceptible to disapproval.
	It's a built-in biological anxiety.
	Like, oh, everyone has this fear of heights and snakes and spiders, and it's like, well, yeah, because they can kill you, right?
	So it's not really a very rational fear, right?
	So for women, the need for social approval is even higher than the need to reproduce, because reproduction is worse than useless without social approval, because it means you've got kids, you're bonded with them, you can't survive on your own, you're rejected by the tribe, you're rejected by women, they won't get your resources, they won't take care of your kids, they'll let them walk off cliffs, they'll let them play with snakes, right?
	Because you can't be everywhere at once, and women had a lot of kids throughout history because they had to play the law of averages, right?
	So for women, conformity...
	Is greater than the need to reproduce.
	The need to be approved of is greater than the need to reproduce.
	Now, of course, for men, I mean, you and I know this as men, and some women do, right?
	Again, we're just talking averages.
	But you and I as men know that for us to survive, we've got to piss people off.
	We have to be pretty comfortable with pissing people off.
	I mean, theoretically, one day I might annoy someone.
	If we just look at, you know, law of averages, right?
	So no, because we have to compete with other men for the top quality females.
	We have to fight other men because it's win-lose, right?
	And we also, if we get the rabbit and bring it home, our neighbor, the man, does not get that rabbit and bring it home, right?
	So for men, it's win-lose.
	And so we have to be comfortable with Annoying the living crap out of other people.
	Now, we've got to play the game, right?
	So you don't want to annoy it to the point where, you know, like in Vietnam, like where they just frag their officers, like you don't want to be that guy.
	So you don't want to annoy people to the point where they'll kill you or, you know, bash your head and wound you or whatever.
	You don't want to create a gang of enemies, but for a man to succeed, you must be comfortable with being disapproved of, which is why a lot of men have become like these soy-based life forms because they're raised by women and mentored by women and taught by women, and so they get this whole conformity thing going on, whereas the whole point of a dad and of masculinity and masculine imperatives is approval is...
	It's not a good thing for men.
	To be approved of is not a good thing.
	Because in order to win the best woman, you have to get extra resources, which means allowing the living crap out of other men.
	And so to be approved of by the woman, you have to annoy the other men.
	And if you're a very high-quality male and you choose a woman, that annoys all the other women.
	So for a man...
	Being comfortable with disapproval is essential for success, whereas for a woman, being incredibly uncomfortable with disapproval is the path to success.
	Does that make sense? Oh, I agree.
	That's a great explanation.
	I've never thought of it in that direct way.
	To tie it together with why the women aren't reproducing...
	If a woman is subjected to enough propaganda that says she will be disapproved of for reproducing, she's a bad tribal member for reproducing, she will be rejected by society for reproducing.
	And reproducing is two levels.
	The first level is having a child and the second is staying home and being a mother.
	Right, so the state is okay relatively with a mother who has a kid and then puts the kid in a government-run daycare.
	Because then the government can imprint on the kid and tell the kid what – it can destroy the culture, it can disrupt the transmission of values and virtues, and then the kid will bond with the state and not the mother.
	So this is why you have two waves of antinatalism.
	There's antinatalism and anticulture.
	So the antinatalism is the basic, and it's unfortunately just aimed at a lot of white women, right?
	So it's, you don't have kids, it's bad for the environment, it's selfish, it produces a patriarchal racist society, blah, blah, blah.
	And in particular, this pointed out at Met, right?
	There was some little short film or ad or something with Sarah Silverman, and she comes up to her mother, the mother says, I've had a boy, and Sarah Silverman says, oh, I'm so sorry, right?
	Oh, that's so terrible, right? Because, you know, boys are less convenient to those in power because we're comfortable with being disapproved of, and therefore we can be leadership competitors to those in charge of things, right?
	So, the first level is don't have kids at all.
	The second level is, okay, if you have kids, at least don't transmit the cultural values that you inherited so that we can control the new normal, right, which is where there's a lot of this.
	I mean, this leftist stuff is coming out of daycare.
	It's coming out of the trauma that kids as single mothers go through, both in terms of the absence of the fathers and the presence of non-bonded male children.
	Males in the household, which raises the chances of abuse over 30 times, and in particular sexual abuse.
	This is where all this grooming stuff is coming from.
	It's just a wide prevalence of sexual abuse in modern fatherless culture and so on.
	So for women, if they genuinely believe that other women will scorn and reject them for staying home with their children, they are biologically programmed to please other women and to please those in authority.
	And so if they're told by everyone...
	Either don't have kids, or if you do have kids, staying home and being a mother is just being a dull-witted broodmare.
	You know, like you hear these things all the time.
	I used to hear this when I was on Twitter, and I talk about the joys of being a parent and encourage women to have kids.
	It's like, oh, I don't want to just be a broodmare.
	And it's like, okay, but enough about your relationship with your mother or what you think of your mother.
	Just view her as a broodmare.
	God, what kind of horrible mother did you have, right?
	So it's not that women are broken at all.
	It's that women have instincts, right?
	That in a free society, in a stateless society in particular, but in a free society, those instincts were very healthy.
	But in a stateless society, those instincts get turned against us.
	The problem is not women, the problem is the state.
	I made this case the other day in a show.
	Getting mad at women for the effects of the state is like getting mad at a slave for being, quote, lazy, right?
	It's like, well, no, the system is entirely wrong, the incentives are entirely wrong.
	Women's vulnerability has been shored up by the state.
	Women don't need to seek a protector because the government will give them money, the government will give them healthcare, the government will give them daycare, the government will give them, quote, free education, the government will give them old age pensions, the government will give them food stamps and subsidized housing, and you name it, right?
	So the government is ripping resources from men, giving it to women, so women don't need men as much.
	In the same way that, you know, pornography and things like that are taking away men's need for women, and it's just terrible, terrible all around, right?
	So, getting mad at women for the corruption of the state is wrong.
	It's like saying that someone's drafted is a coward because they don't feel like fighting.
	It's like, well, they're being forced to. So, we have to look at our sisters who are, and of course, a lot of propaganda really gets focused heavily on women, right?
	And not because they're weak-willed, but just because...
	But evolutionarily speaking, they're more susceptible to propaganda because they need the approval of those around them in order to survive.
	So they're programmed to be a little bit more compliant and a little bit higher in the psychological trait called agreeableness.
	Men are low in agreeableness.
	Women are high in agreeableness.
	And that's how we evolved.
	It's perfectly wonderful for our society.
	But you put the state in there and it messes everything up.
	But then getting mad at women for all of that?
	I don't know. It just seems like you're kind of missing...
	I don't know if you are mad about it.
	You wanted an explanation more than a blame, but I think you're kind of missing the enemy, so to speak, if that makes sense.
	Well, but isn't it, I guess we get mad at the lefty, the leftoid bug men that allowed the state to become large enough to where then women, you know, women get the vote and then they vote for this leftist nonsense that destroys families and society.
	As a man, are we programmed to please women as men?
	Absolutely. Right.
	Right. Right.
	So, I mean, you know, in America, Wisconsin, I think, gave women the vote pretty early on, and do you know why?
	No, I do not. Because there weren't many women there, and they wanted to attract more women to come to the state.
	Huh. Right?
	It's just about getting your stick wet, right?
	That's what it's about, right?
	So men are programmed to please women and if women say we want to vote, asking men to say no to that is virtually impossible because men who did not please women did not get to reproduce and women hold the reins.
	And the more complex the society, right, and the higher the average IQ of its inhabitants, the more men are dependent upon women's approval because women need to really be engaged and involved in raising the kids.
	So again, the problem is not women.
	The problem is the state.
	You know, if you want to know the solution to hypergamy is Bitcoin.
	The solution to hypergamy is Bitcoin because if governments cannot create resources out of thin air, you know, and to take a sort of ridiculous way of putting it, you know, women are used to stamping their feet and getting resources because 40% of men throughout human history didn't even reproduce.
	So if you didn't please a woman, Your genes died out.
	So all the genes of the men who are like, I just say no to women all the time, right?
	And this is another reason why the state doesn't like happy marriages, because a happily married man can say no to women, because he's already got a great woman.
	I don't want another woman. I can't be with my wife until the day we die, right?
	So men are programmed to please women, and women say, we want to vote.
	I mean, you know the white feathers out of World War I, right?
	The women would walk around to young men of enlisted age, not in uniform, and hand out white feathers of cowardice.
	And this shamed millions of men to go and fight in a stupid war that killed 10 million people for no purpose other than creating the groundwork for the Second World War when it happened all over again.
	So you can literally kill a man with a small white feather.
	And the reason for that, of course, just statistics, right?
	Is if 90% of women won't sleep, won't raise their children if you don't go to war, but if you go to war and you only have a 50% chance of getting injured, then you're 40% up, right?
	In terms of reproduction.
	So your genes say, okay, if women won't approve of me, if I don't go fight this war, I have more chance of reproducing if I go and fight the war than if I stay home.
	So we go fight the war.
	That's what our genes tell us to do.
	Now, you can say, well, that's stupid.
	Why would you be killed by a feather?
	It's like, well, but how be your fault, right?
	So crypto, Bitcoin, limited currency solves because you can't print money out of thin air and buy people's votes and all that.
	So I'll buy women's votes and so on.
	And, you know, everybody knows that when women get the vote, social spending and debt goes through the roof, right?
	Because women are just used to...
	Either enticing or complaining into getting resources.
	Enticing when they're young and more sexually attractive and then often nagging when they get older.
	And there's nothing wrong with that.
	There's nothing wrong with this. How have we evolved?
	You know, men are as women chose them and women are to a large degree, not quite as much because women choose more as men chose them.
	You know, why are there very few bald women?
	Because men wouldn't sleep with a bald woman.
	Why are there bald men? Because women will sleep with a bald man.
	Right? So that's why they are.
	We are as each other chose them.
	Why aren't women as physically strong as men?
	Because men didn't choose women that physically strong.
	And so we're just a reflection of each other's choices.
	And we're in this crazy world.
	It's a psychotic world of artificial resources, right?
	Made-up currency, made-up money, infinite debt, right?
	So we're in this truly psychotic world of infinite resources.
	And when people believe that they're in a situation of infinite resources, reason, economics, morality, these are all sort of limited...
	If you knew that you were completely invulnerable and would live forever...
	You wouldn't take care of your health.
	You'd take up extreme sports.
	People go crazy when they believe they're in a situation of infinite resources and invulnerability.
	And, you know, nature balances out, right?
	So in the tropics, there are more resources, like coconuts year-round, fish year-round, you name it, year-round.
	But, you know, way more viruses and illnesses and diseases because the winter doesn't kill off the bacteria and the viruses.
	So it, you know, balances out, right?
	And so, yeah, I just say getting mad at women for what the state is doing to them.
	You know, it's like getting mad at a lion for being neurotic when it's locked in a small cage for 20 years.
	It's like the problem is the cage, not the lion, if that makes sense.
	What advice would you give?
	I've already found a woman.
	She was from Poland, born and raised in Poland.
	She only wanted a couple kids, but now we're together.
	She wants a bunch of kids like I do.
	She's fully on board.
	I have a lot of male employees of mine and also friends who cannot find Well, it's respect India.
	Yeah, respect India.
	I'm sorry, what was that? Respect India.
	So in India, you know the dot on the forehead for Indian women?
	You've seen that? Okay.
	Well, you know what I'm talking about, right?
	I do not. Oh, so in India, women put a red dot on their forehead.
	Hit me in the comments if you know why.
	If you know why women put the red dot on their forehead in India.
	I do know why. It's part of the dowry.
	When the man marries her, he scratches it off and finds out whether he's won a convenience store or a hotel.
	No, it's to show that they're married, right?
	Okay. And that's so that men don't waste resources pursuing a woman who's already married, right?
	I mean, the ring is the same, used to be the same in Western society, right?
	The woman wears the ring, the man wears the ring, oh, they're married, and therefore you don't waste time pursuing someone who's married, right?
	Interesting. So you need markers for people that you shouldn't date, right?
	Well, flaming red hair or pink hair is one sign you shouldn't date a woman that has that.
	Yeah, you've got a lot of tattoos.
	You've got that weird side-swept hairdo.
	You've got a Karen hairdo.
	You've got blue hair.
	You've got that weird anime Amy Winehouse makeup.
	You've got... Pronouns.
	Whatever, right? I mean, these are just clear signs.
	Like, society is incredibly convenient these days.
	Because when women were better at hiding their craziness, you might marry someone, turn out to be crazy, you wouldn't have any advance warning.
	But now women are just like, they're right up front.
	I'm nuts. Liberal women, as you know, unbelievable amounts of mental health issues.
	Diagnosed with mental health issues multiple times more than conservative women than Republican or right-leaning women.
	And you see, you know, if you go on the bios of like the hard leftists and so on, it's like, you know, anxiety, depression, you know, multiple personality disorder, you know, dysphoria, dysthymia, like it's just a big catalog of mental health issues.
	So in India, the women have the red dot and in the West, they have the hammer and sickle.
	They're both red, right?
	It's perfect. It's perfect.
	You need the move along thing.
	You need the, oh, okay, move along, right, move along.
	You know, it's kind of like if there aren't a lot of parking spaces, you have this, everyone who drives has this, right?
	You're like, you're desperate for a parking space, you know, you got to pee or whatever it is, your kids are crying.
	You're desperate for a parking space and, oh, good, there's a parking space, right?
	And then you go, motorcycle, damn, right?
	But what's great about it is, you know, some of the more advanced parking lots, they have, you know, this floor full, go to the next floor, right?
	This is all very efficient ways to get you to that parking space.
	So you've got to think of women, they're nuts, right?
	Right? You know, they're posing virtually topless with a kid in the background, right?
	I mean, it's like, it's not, it's easy.
	It's like, oh, parking lot, go to the next level.
	This parking space, keep going.
	Whereas in the past, you know, like, you maybe would have all these women, they dress really nicely, they look really conservative, they go to church, but they're crazy.
	But they're well camouflaged.
	There's no camouflage anymore.
	The crazy women are right there, and the solid, sane women are presenting themselves not in that way.
	You couldn't ask for a more efficient sorting mechanism.
	People are complaining that there are too many crazy women, and it's like, no, that's good.
	I mean, it's not good that there are too many crazy, but if you're looking for a sane woman, pretty easy to find.
	Just keep walking past all the crazy ones, right?
	Maybe it's... I feel like I'm pretty attractive.
	I'm intelligent and I make a lot of money.
	So I have an easier time than some of my other friends and stuff.
	But I feel like a lot of women just have these insane high standards.
	Like, okay, Cupid put out a thing that 80% of women rated men is below average, which is statistically impossible.
	Sure. 80% of them are unattractive.
	Spoiler! Women bad at math.
	Exactly. So, I mean, what I'm getting at is I feel like Even the sane women, you know, every woman is at least too crazy.
	Even the quote-unquote sane women have these ridiculously high standards, so it's so hard for decent men or normal men.
	No, no, that's perfect. No, that is absolutely perfect, right?
	Absolutely perfect, right?
	Not for them. No, no, it's perfect.
	Because a woman who has wildly unrealistic standards, you don't want to marry.
	You know the triple six thing, right?
	Yes, I have that.
	Yeah, six foot tall, make six figures, six inch dick or more, right?
	Yes. I think that's it.
	Yeah, yeah. And if a woman who is overweight, in debt, unattractive, unappealing, a single mom, if she's like, I'm holding out for the 666...
	You keep holding out.
	I would advise women not to lower their standards.
	I agree. Because that's delusional.
	That is delusional.
	I mean, it literally is like a guy saying...
	It's, I don't know, who's hot these days?
	Megan Fox is probably a bit old too, plus she's dating that creep with the gun name.
	But whoever's hot these days, I don't know, what is it, Jessica Simpson is back in her hot phase?
	Bella Delphine, the OnlyFans.
	Oh no, but she would be completely meant to date, right?
	I mean, she's damaged goods beyond what anyone could imagine, right?
	But, you know, it would be like me saying, I'm only going to date Megan Fox.
	Oh, and I'm only going to date Megan Fox at the age she was in Transformers.
	I'm going to date Megan Fox from 15 years ago, whatever, right?
	Right, so whoever it's going to be, I'm only going to date, I don't know, Sniper Wolf or something like that, right?
	Okay, so, you know, this don't settle is a test of reproductive fitness, right?
	So if a woman is told, you know, you're all that and a slice of ham, you know, you can be some sort of land whale and you can still land a top-tier alpha male who's a Bitcoin zillionaire, right?
	And it's just an IQ test, right?
	And the IQ test is, do you have, right, because we men, when it comes to dating, we're super empirical, right?
	I mean, every man has the same pattern.
	You, me, everyone. You start at the top and you work your way down.
	Right? You start at the top, and you work your way down.
	And I started at the top, absolutely.
	First girl I asked out was the most popular girl in school.
	Prettiest, most popular girl in school.
	Absolutely. Totally queer.
	And then I ended up getting the second most popular girl in school.
	That's fine. You know, that's still pretty good odds for me, right?
	So, yeah, so for men, start at the top, work your way down.
	And we're empirical, right?
	You start at the top until someone says yes, you just keep going.
	Okay, slightly less attractive.
	Okay, we got someone, right?
	And women, but we of course don't have the same things to offer, right?
	Because women can offer up sex and, you know, the alpha widow thing, right?
	Where a woman says, well, you know, I get all these triple sixes to date me or sleep with me, so that means I can get one as a husband.
	It's like, nope, doesn't mean that at all.
	It doesn't mean that at all.
	And the more she sleeps with people like that, the less likely a good guy is going to want to marry her because I don't want a woman that can't pair on.
	Yes, of course. And any woman who will sleep with you quickly is too insecure to be the mother of your children.
	Like, that's just a basic fact.
	I mean, we men, we like, at least when I was younger, you know, it's nice if a woman is available, but you're not going to marry her if she has sex with you too quick because she's too insecure.
	There's a saying that the women choose who they have sex with and the men choose who they marry, I think.
	Yeah, yeah, no. Women control access to sex.
	Men control access to relationships.
	It's a total ripoff of Kevin Samuels, but it's a point worth repeating, right?
	And a woman who offers up sex too quickly just holds herself in very low regard.
	And look, I sympathize.
	I really do. Because again, I'm not blaming women for the effects of propaganda.
	And the reason there's so much propaganda is because there's a government.
	Right. And so I don't want to, but I mean, think women know this, right?
	I mean, this is all the way back to that old song, you know, will you still love me tomorrow?
	Right. Tonight, the night of love is in your eyes.
	Yeah, sure. Yeah, yeah. Or I remember watching a movie when I have an old Goldie Hawn movie called Private Benjamin, you know, and it's like, he said he loved me.
	He said he was going to be his forever.
	And then what happened?
	And then he came.
	Right. And then it all went away, right?
	I get it, right? And so, yeah.
	The don't settle.
	It's just, yeah. Keep your standards high.
	Let yourself gain weight.
	Keep your standards high. Dress yourself like a banshee from another dimension and put the makeup on that makes you look like a clown hit a speed bump.
	You know, just do what you need to do.
	And I just... Don't lower your standards.
	That's totally fine. Because we men, we have to lower our standards.
	I say this, and I feel I got the perfect woman, certainly perfect for me.
	So when I felt I couldn't do any better, I put a ring on her 20 years ago.
	I'm incredibly happy that I did.
	This applies to all women but our wives.
	I agree. Yeah, so I don't know what to say.
	And there is...
	You know, there are a lot of unattractive people out there these days.
	I was talking about this in a live stream the other day.
	It was a premium live stream.
	If you want to pick it up for a couple of bucks a month, you can get the premium stuff at freedomain.locals.com.
	Will do. Yeah, there's a lot of people out there that nobody really wants.
	And it's really sad.
	You know, it's like that old Beatles song, Eleanor Rigby, right?
	Look at all the lonely people.
	There are a lot of people out there They don't really have much to offer.
	They don't have really much that differentiates themselves.
	And particularly women, they've tried to conform themselves into being attractive, but then there's nothing individual enough about them to love.
	Like the NPC thing, okay, now everyone approves of you and nobody's mad at you and everyone nods and gives you kudos for having a Ukrainian flag in your bio as if history just started this year.
	So, nobody really disapproves of you.
	Everyone gives you these likes and rainbows, but nobody loves you because you're not individual enough to be differentiated from the general horde.
	I support the current thing.
	Yeah, I support that. So, if you open up a box of eggs and they all look the same, do you have a favorite egg?
	No. And if people are just supporting the current thing, liking propaganda, okay, they gain the benefit of not being disapproved of or being criticized by anyone, really.
	But they've also given up love.
	They've given up being individual and authentic enough that you can choose them from somebody else.
	The conformity thing, it's such a drug.
	Because it gives you this relief in the moment.
	But it costs you everything in the long run.
	And again, this is an IQ test.
	Can you... Can you put off...
	Can you defer the gratification?
	So I say, okay, well, I might be disapproved of, but if I can never be disapproved of, I can never really be approved of, and love is the final approval.
	Love is the final approval of someone.
	I approve of you so much, I love you until we're going to die.
	And so that's the MPC thing, man.
	And nobody talks to them about this, really.
	Nobody talks to them and says, okay, you can do all of the current thing stuff, and you'll get this cheap...
	It's like pornography for the soul, right?
	You spill your seed, but you don't raise any kids, right?
	And you can get this relief and have people say, stunning and brave, and how wonderful you are, and this, that, and the other, and it's like, okay, but no one is going to be able to love you.
	It's not that no one will love you or you will be...
	It's impossible to love you if you conform, because there isn't enough you there to love.
	It's like, you know, the Macs come off in an assembly line, and you don't love a particular Mac, because they're all the same.
	You can't say, oh, if these million Macs, that's the one I choose.
	No, it's just, give me a Mac, right?
	They're all interchangeable, right?
	It's just a thing. And if you don't have your own thoughts and your own opinions, there's not enough of you there to love physically.
	Like, it's impossible to do it.
	People can fake it if they want.
	They can give you approval. They can like your Instagram, blah, or whatever, right?
	But... It's really, really tragic how much you give up through conformity.
	But of course, it is a drug and it's an IQ test.
	So I hope that helps.
	Yes. And then one last question.
	This will be quick. Do you do any in-person meetups at all?
	Are there any events you're going to in the next year or so?
	I'd love to meet up with you in person or go to an event you're attending.
	No, I'm sorry. I don't mean to lie.
	I don't have any in-person meetups.
	Unfortunately, it's just physically risky for the attendees and very expensive in terms of security.
	So, yeah, it's my time in the wilderness and it's great to chat with you guys and to chat with you in particular.
	It's wonderful to hear about your family and all of that.
	Yeah, I heard big shiny forehead con is in town.
	Yeah, I see a lot of people think I am.
	What, grifter, con and all that?
	Yeah. All right.
	Well, thanks very much. I'm just going to see how I can do it.
	Thank you very much. A great pleasure to chat with you.
	Congratulations again. All right.
	Amber, Mr.
	Kermit, if you want to unmute, I can take one more question before we close things down.
	Great pleasure to chat with you guys today.
	I just wanted to remind you of that.
	But Amber, if you wanted to AMR, if you wanted to unmute yourself, I believe I... Yeah.
	Go ahead. Hey, Steph.
	Hi. How are you doing?
	I'm a little bit starstruck right now.
	That's very kind, but honestly, I feel that every day when I look in the mirror.
	I'm just kidding. I appreciate that.
	So, yeah, what's on your mind? Well, I wrote it in the chat earlier, but I'll just say it again.
	Yeah, I recently got tapped for like a big...
	I'm so sorry. Could you just stop rustling?
	Your mic is crackling and rustling.
	It drives me a little batty, so if you could just hold still or not touch your mic or whatever, that'd be great.
	But go ahead. Sorry. All right.
	Yeah, I got tapped for a new job.
	I've been freelancing for the past eight months almost.
	No, I'm still getting the mic thing, man.
	Whatever you're doing, put it down and don't touch it.
	Sorry to be annoying. We don't even concentrate on what you're saying, but go ahead.
	How about now? I'm sure that's going to be fine.
	Go ahead. All right.
	Yeah. So I was freelancing for about eight months and then I got tapped for a job by one of the people that have been contracting me.
	So right now I'm going through the negotiations and it's all looking really fine, but I've been kind of contemplating before I signed the paperwork and kind of make it all official and binding.
	What I'd be giving up, because as a freelancer, I have all this flexibility, like time.
	I can decide when I want to work, how much I want to work.
	I also have the option of traveling and remote working.
	Yeah, but this new job, I would be made into a CEO of a new company, a startup, and kind of take on all the responsibility therein.
	So I just wanted to see if I can get your thoughts on that.
	What phase of life are you in?
	Married? Kids? Dating?
	29? Single?
	I don't date anymore.
	I don't view it as a good use of my time with the dating landscape as it is at the moment.
	I don't know, how frank do you want me to be?
	You tell me one to ten. Oh, please, yeah, just give me everything.
	Okay, I mean, why would I care about your future if you don't really have one as far as offspring and dating and marriage?
	Because then it's just like, okay, should I just for myself gather or not these resources?
	Okay, but for what, right?
	I mean, if you're not going to have kids and, you know, I know some people can't, so I sympathize with all of that, but what would it really matter what you choose to do if you're not going to be continuing as a life form?
	Right. Oh, I'm super interested in getting married and having kids.
	It's just that the environment that I'm in at the moment, it just doesn't seem to me like there are any interesting prospects around me.
	I live in Germany.
	And... Yeah, I just...
	Don't feel like there's a lot of good...
	Come on. I mean, there are a lot of free thinkers in Germany.
	I don't mean to tell you about your country, but, you know, I've read the news.
	There's massive protests against government overreach.
	There's, you know, significant skepticism against a lot of government mandates and so on, right?
	So there is a lot of free thinkers in Germany, at least people, women, and I see a lot of women in the marches too, right?
	Willing to think for themselves and question dogma and so on.
	Sure. I mean, it's not like I don't go out there and put myself out there.
	If anything, I got the impression that I was doing that a little bit too much in the previous years, that it just felt a bit alienating to me.
	And then I decided to focus more on just taking a break from dating, taking a break from focusing on pursuing women to first get my own...
	See, last year, I set a goal for myself that I would try to double my income by the age of 30, which I kind of managed.
	That was when I was 28.
	Well, congratulations on that.
	That's not easy, so well done.
	Go ahead. And succeed at things that I put my mind to, just not with women.
	And when was your last serious relationship?
	I don't think I've had a serious relationship.
	I think I've had stuff that came close.
	I mean, my last relationship was over a year ago, over a year and a half ago.
	And it lasted for about...
	Four months and then she moved away and she didn't seem interested in like neither of us were interested in long distance relationship and she didn't seem interested in having a serious relationship anyway.
	And how old was she? 19 at the time and I was 27.
	Right. Okay so she's not desperate for kids or like she's not pushing 30 and you know aiming to settle down or anything right?
	Right, yeah. My most serious relationship before that was with somebody who was a bit too intense and domineering, and I got too much of that growing up from my mother, so I kind of put an end to that very quickly.
	And your parents' relationship, how did that go between them?
	Oh, it's a disaster.
	Have you ever seen Rick and Morty?
	No. No.
	Okay. Well, I was going to say my dad is Jerry.
	Anyway, they've been divorced ever since I was 18.
	As soon as I moved out, I have an older brother, so as soon as we both moved out, they just immediately divorced.
	My mom kicked my dad out.
	And yeah, it's, I don't know.
	Ask me more specific questions because I'm getting...
	What was wrong with their relationship?
	Well, I think he was too conflict-averse.
	And to a conflict avoidant, and she's very domineering and angry and just yelling all the time.
	Well, he may not be conflict avoidant.
	He just may be abuse avoidant.
	Yeah, also, yeah.
	I totally agree, yeah.
	Domineering German mother.
	Gosh, I'm waiting for you to break these stereotypes, but go on.
	No, no, no. She's not German.
	I'm actually an immigrant, so I'm actually Egyptian.
	I'm born and raised in Egypt, and I moved to Germany.
	Oh, dominating Egyptian mother.
	Okay. I'm not sure that's really breaking the stereotype even more, but all right.
	All right. Yeah, we say Muslim Egyptian mothers are like the stereotypical Jewish mother in a Mel Brooks film.
	Right. She earned more money than him by pure coincidence.
	He's a professor.
	She worked for a bank and then just by virtue of how the Egyptian economy kind of went, she ended up making much more money than he did.
	I think that's one of the main reasons why they had so much conflict throughout their marriage.
	Well, I don't know about that.
	I mean, that's saying that the base mammal brain of hypergamy runs everything.
	There are happy marriages where the woman makes more money.
	I hope so.
	This is probably one of the main reasons why you want to make a lot of money, right?
	As you maybe saw or imagined how things played with your dad and didn't want the same situation.
	Possibly. Yeah, sure.
	I mean, for me, money represents a lot of things, mostly financial independence from them because actually money is kind of a big sticking point in the family.
	I mean, an example of that is my older brother who's married and he lives in a house which my mom bought him, which is kind of very normal for the Egyptian way of doing things that people usually Get their first house paid for by their parents.
	Well, yes, but it costs you later, right?
	Legally. Right.
	Well, it costs him now because the house is still legally in his name, and so whenever he's not towing her line, she implies or threatens to kick him out.
	Well, and of course, when your parents get old, where are they going to go?
	Oh, yeah. No, she has her own house.
	Oh, no, when she gets too old, like when she gets old, right?
	And she needs care or supervision or whatever, right?
	Yeah. Yeah, I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, but it shouldn't be because, you know, I bought you a house, now you have to take me in.
	It's straight up bartering, right?
	I mean, I definitely think a lot about when you, in your story, when you, you know, cut ties with your parents and I usually think about if it's the right thing for me to do because I get sick of both of their bullshit.
	I was on vacation.
	It wasn't vacation.
	I just stayed in Egypt for like three and a half months earlier this year, which was the first time I stayed this long in 10 years.
	The first month and a half, my dad didn't call me or take my calls or even meet with me.
	And my mom, I got into a fight with her, and I was staying with her at the time, and we didn't talk to each other for two months.
	It was like living in a shared apartment where you're kind of not talking with that person.
	Wait, you were roommates with your mom?
	Yeah. Having trouble finding a good woman, are you?
	Please, come live with me and my overbearing mom.
	Hey, where are you going? Why are you moving away?
	Why don't you want to do a long distance?
	Ah! No, no, no.
	I have my own place in Germany, which is where I live all the time.
	I just wanted to escape the lockdown madness over the past winter and also just get some sun.
	So I went back for three months and I just stayed with her for three months.
	And I was still doing my remote working from there and taking the opportunity to visit family.
	Because if I'm going to go back to Egypt, I'm not going to stay at a hotel.
	Or buy an apartment that I'm only going to use one month out of the entire year.
	But yeah, anyway, maybe that's neither here or there.
	Right. Well, I mean, do you want to get married and have kids?
	Oh yeah, sure, of course.
	All right. As many as I can get.
	But you don't have any experience dating, right?
	I mean, would you hire someone, if you're CEO, would you hire someone from a job who had no experience?
	Probably as an intern.
	Yeah, but not for any position of significance, right?
	Okay, so you're pushing 30 and you have no experience with successful relationships.
	So this is a crisis.
	Yeah. Well, I don't know what a successful relationship looks like.
	I mean, I've been in relationships before, and they went well enough.
	Hang on. We're agreeing here, so let's not spend time on things that we agree on, right?
	Because you've got to look at this from a woman's standpoint.
	From a woman's standpoint, you're going to ask a woman to commit to you, to have babies with you, to depend upon you, and you have no experience with successful relationships.
	Well, I mean, nobody has successful experiences with relationships until they get married, right?
	Well, no, I get that.
	Okay, let me put it to you this another way.
	Would you hire someone who had worked only intermittently and the longest time they'd ever worked at a place was four months?
	Probably not. I'll take this opportunity to say that my longest relationship is...
	Hang on.
	If somebody wanted to work at your company and they had not worked in a long time, they'd worked very intermittently, and the longest time they'd ever worked for anyone was four months, you would not hire them.
	And if you would hire them, you shouldn't be a CEO. Yeah.
	Can we at least agree on that?
	Because they're either lazy, or they're inconstant, or they don't need to work, or they don't want to work, or they don't take instruction, or they quit at the first sign of difficulty, so you're going to hire that person, you're going to train them, and then they're just going to leave, right?
	So you understand, on the dating market, you're thinking about things like a job, right?
	Like you think professionally you're very sensible and make good decisions, right?
	But on the dating market, you've got to think of it in economic terms.
	Now, let's say...
	Somebody had worked at a place for two years and then it didn't work out, right?
	Okay, well, they at least worked someplace for two years and they're able to handle that level of job and commitment and this, that, and the other, right?
	Yeah. But if you have almost no experience in dating and you certainly have no experience in any kind of successful relationship, right?
	Then the only thing that is for sure is that you have a track record of almost total failure.
	And if you think about that in terms of a job, the fact that you're 30 and you've only ever, quote, worked at a place for four months and you haven't worked in years or forever, right?
	That's a huge negative. So that's what I mean by saying it's a crisis.
	I'll just take this opportunity to tell you that my longest relationship was, I think, between two and a half and three years.
	So that was a while ago. Okay.
	How old were you then? I was, let's see, 23 probably.
	So it was like from the age of 23 to about 26.
	And why did that end?
	Well, I just didn't feel like the person I was with marriage material.
	And also I wasn't, you know, independent from, you know, I was still in university.
	I still didn't have enough resources to even manage a marriage.
	So it was… Okay, okay.
	So if someone came to you for a job and they said, I did three years of a business degree before finding out I didn't want to be in business, I didn't want to be in the business world, what would you think of that person?
	Well, I think that person was probably not very serious.
	Well, it just means they didn't know themselves very well.
	Now, I know that I'm giving you kind of a contradiction.
	I agree with that. No, I know that I'm giving you kind of a contradiction, which is like, well, you know, if you only have the longest relationship is four months, that's bad.
	But if your longest relationship is three years, that's bad too.
	Because what you need...
	Now, you could say, like, if somebody was in...
	I've interviewed like a thousand people and hired like a hundred people, right?
	So if somebody came into my office and said, you know, I did three years of a business degree, and then let me tell you, just...
	I happened to be with a friend of mine who was going for an audition, and I ended up being in the theater world, and I loved the theater world.
	I ended up being really good at that, and then I spent five years as an actor, right?
	Right. So that's a good reason why you didn't finish your business degree.
	You found something out of the blue that you were much more passionate about.
	Does this sort of make sense? Yeah.
	So the equivalent in dating would be, oh yeah, no, I dated someone for, you know, two or three years.
	And I thought that it was a good relationship.
	But then I met this woman.
	She just blew my mind.
	I just realized I'd been playing real small, real safe, real inconsequential for a long time.
	And I just completely...
	My heart grew three sizes when I met her.
	So if you don't have a good reason, if it was just like, well, I was there for three years and it just kind of petered out, she wasn't really marriage material and so on, you've got to have a good reason why a woman's going to trust you.
	And if you have a history of drifting out of relationships after a couple of years, then she's going to look at that and she's going to say, holy crap, so he could be with me for two or three years.
	And then he might just find me not marriage material.
	Now, that's different when you're 22 than when you're 30.
	Because a woman doesn't have time to burn when she's 30.
	So you better know exactly why things went wrong and how you can fix that and how it's not going to happen again if you want to date a woman close to your age who's got half a brain.
	Does that make sense? That does make sense.
	In general, I would say it's also not something that's lost on me, that I have a certain pattern of being the one who moves on quickly from relationships.
	When I met my wife, I had a good reason as to why I was trustworthy.
	I just had people in my life that weren't great for me.
	And there was pretty good reasons why they weren't great for me.
	I've gone to therapy. I've dealt with all that stuff.
	I'm ready to commit. Like, I've got a story.
	And it wasn't just a story.
	Like, why would you trust me?
	I'm still single in my 30s.
	I'm a good-looking guy.
	I'm charismatic. I had some success in the business world.
	Like, why am I still single?
	It's a good question, right? Too good to be true, right?
	Too good to be true. Well, in general, I... Go ahead.
	Was that question rhetorical?
	No, no. I'm just saying that you're going to need...
	And when I say story, I don't mean fiction.
	I mean a narrative.
	As to, look, here's why, although I just got bored of a woman after three years, here's why that's not going to happen with you.
	I've learned... So much about myself.
	I've done therapy. I've done self-work.
	Whatever it is. You don't have to worry about me.
	Okay, good. Well, then you've got to really be aware of that.
	Because I'm telling you, the reason you're not, I would guess, the reason you're not finding quality women is that you're a high-risk candidate for a woman.
	Now, you're a high-appeal candidate, right?
	Right. You're smart, you're obviously eloquent, you're successful, you're well off.
	So yeah, there's a lot there, but a woman needs to know that you have the capacity to truly commit to her.
	And you have no evidence of that for her.
	As far as I can tell, listen, we just met, so I could be completely wrong about this.
	But you need to...
	A woman can sense this.
	Women's intuition is incredibly attuned as to whether a man is going to stick around, because women who made mistakes about that didn't generally tend to do very well during our evolution, right?
	Yeah.
	So you've got to give off a vibe.
	Yeah.
	It's great that you're successful and great that you doubled your income in a year or two.
	I don't know if you heard me say congratulations.
	That's really tough. Good for you.
	Well done. Fantastic. That's amazing.
	Good, good, good. But if you're doing that to be more attractive to women, you're missing something, I think, with all due respect.
	I think you're missing that the woman needs to know that you are emotionally ready to truly commit.
	And if you don't know what went wrong in the past and you've just avoided dating and your last relationship with four months and then you drifted out of love after a couple of years in your early 20s, you know, because for a woman, she's going to say, okay, well, why wasn't that the woman you marry, right?
	I mean, you were together for a couple of years and your first couple of years of dating, you were with this woman.
	What happened there? Well, we just kind of drifted apart.
	She's like, oh, no, I don't have three years to burn to find out.
	And it could be four years for this and he drifts apart or thinks I'm not marriage material or whatever, right?
	You've got to know exactly why things went wrong and how you fixed it.
	Does that make sense? Yeah.
	Well, one thing that has happened Recently, I think one general thing in kind of the last, let's say, before the last three years, I was lost.
	I didn't have my ideals set.
	I was dealing a lot with my own issues.
	And so, a lot of the women that I've dated there were either people that I've met who Let's say, weren't really interested in having that sort of relationship, or I was attracting, you know, psychos.
	Maybe that's a bit harsh, or let's just say some people who kind of play off of my own...
	No, you've got to reframe that. Sorry, you've got to reframe that.
	No, you weren't attracting psychos.
	You were vulnerable to psychos, likely because of your parents, particularly your mom.
	Maybe, yeah, yeah.
	No, I mean, if you're wounded, and if somebody hits you hard, and I remember being at a summer camp and dancing with a woman, a girl, I was a kid, right?
	I was like 14 or whatever, right?
	And I was dancing with a girl, and a friend of mine, quote, friend, came by and gave me a chart, like he just whacked me hard in the leg, so that it was really hard for me to slow dance with this girl.
	I guess he was petty and jealous or whatever, right?
	Right.
	Yeah. I mean, that's a whole other issue.
	No, and I get that. And this is why I'm always a big fan of talk therapy, and you've certainly got the resources to do it.
	But if I were in your shoes, I don't know whether you should be CEO or not.
	But I do know that...
	I want you to be a dad.
	I do know that, right?
	I mean, obviously everybody who's interested in philosophy, I'm very invested in having kids, right?
	Because, you know, I don't want my daughter to grow up the only sane person in the universe, right?
	And so I'm purely selfish in this, but I think that our interests overlap because, you know, you're a smart guy and you're a wise guy and you're a successful guy and you love philosophy and fantastic.
	Like, let's try. So you've got to remove the things that are in the way of you Getting married and having kids, if you want that.
	It sounds like you do, right? Of course, yeah.
	I do feel like...
	I mean, the way I see it is that my, let's say, my genetic lineage or whatever is not my own to end by...
	Yeah, yeah. We just, you know, we're all on loan from the future, right?
	It's a car we've borrowed.
	We don't get to drive a car into the ground when we're renting it, right?
	Exactly. So here's the thing.
	Sorry, go ahead. Well, one major shift in my life and that's actually been a big battle for me for the past, let's say, four years is that I was very addicted to marijuana throughout my university.
	I mean, university is just a cesspool and it's so widely accepted here in Germany.
	And you could say addicted to marijuana.
	Again, the reframing could be, I ended up self-medicating for trauma using marijuana.
	Oh yeah, I was self-medicating and I kicked it more than a year ago now.
	I also, last year, I got baptized as a Christian.
	So I grew up Muslim.
	I became an atheist around the age of 17 or 18, stayed that way.
	And then I got into Jordan Peterson in 2017 once he started getting in on the scene and that kind of got me interested and I joined up with a local church eventually.
	What a journey. Okay, so let me ask you this.
	So you want a nice Christian wife, right?
	Yeah. Okay. Nice Christian wife meets your mom.
	Oh no, that's a bad idea.
	Well, isn't she going to?
	Nice Christian girlfriend. Meet your mom and you say, hey, we can have 40 years with her.
	I wouldn't. Okay, so look, I hate that this is your choice.
	I really do. I hate that this is your choice.
	I wish your mom was someone that you would be proud and happy with.
	I hope when my daughter starts dating that she's going to be proud and happy to introduce her boyfriends to me and her mom.
	I hope that that's going to be the case.
	I'm sure it will be. So I'm sorry that you have this choice, but if it is, if it is a stark choice, if this is your choice, which is I either have a future with a good woman or I can hang out with my mom as she ages, I'm fighting for your balls here, man.
	I really am, right? I mean, what do your future children need, right?
	Because they're not going to be around, probably, or at least I doubt they'll be around, if your mom is going to make a good woman say, regretfully, hey, he's a nice guy, but I can't spend 40 years with that woman, especially when she's going to move in when we get older.
	Oh, no. Yeah.
	And this was my choice.
	So I don't want to say this is everyone's choice, but I think it should be stated as clearly and objectively as possible.
	My life is certainly no recipe for everyone else.
	I think there are some good principles involved, but there's no photocopying called identity.
	But for me, the choice was, okay...
	I did not choose to have my mother in my life.
	She is very dysfunctional and destructive and violent and anti-rational.
	And if I have a choice between being a slave to the past I did not choose or carving a future for myself that I respect, in other words, if the choice is between my mother and a quality wife, I got to tell you, maybe I would have been a better person if there'd been more hesitation, but once I got it that clearly, It wasn't even difficult.
	Yeah. I mean, I see that play out in my brother's life.
	I mean, he got married last year, and my mom has been making his life hell with his wife.
	All sorts of ways. Well, yeah, okay.
	Now, making your life hell, you're used to that, right?
	The problem is...
	The problem is she's making your brother's wife's life hell.
	My brother's life. Yeah, and the wife's life hell, and that's where he's really going to pay.
	Now, she chose, right?
	She chose to get involved in this family situation, but a woman of quality, a woman of discernment and wisdom will look at your family situation and say, he's a nice guy, man.
	He's really successful, smart, good-looking, but, oh, man, that's a hell of a thing to be walking into.
	How am I going to spend 40 years biting my tongue?
	If he's going to have to...
	Here's the question.
	Look, this is a question.
	This is for all the men out there.
	And for the women, too, regarding to you.
	This is the big question.
	Your future wife potential.
	Your future wife potential.
	She's going to look. And she's going to say, what happens to him if his mother puts all her pressure on him?
	If his mother wants something and his mother puts all of her pressure on him, what's going to happen?
	Because if she's a good woman, she's not going to pressure you or bully you or manipulate you or anything like that, right?
	So she's going to say, okay, am I going to be disarmed with somebody who's got the nuclear option because it's a mom who'll manipulate?
	And a mom who'll manipulate is virtually irresistible to kids because we just grew up conforming to that and she's an authority figure that will never fade, right?
	Or it'll fade a little bit, it doesn't ever end, right?
	So your future wife, your wife-to-be is going to look at you and say, okay, Is he going to choose me or his mom if she really puts the pressure on?
	Let's say his mom gets old and frail.
	She wants to move in. I don't want her to move in.
	Who's going to win? Because if you are going to bend to your mom, in other words, if your mom is going to be more manipulative, more successful at controlling you than your wife, who as a good woman won't control or manipulate you, she's going to look at that and say, I'm going to lose every time.
	He is a mama's boy.
	She's going to run the show.
	And I'm going to lose. And then I'm going to lose my respect for him.
	I'm going to lose my desire for him.
	Because you need to be the leader in your household.
	Now, the woman needs to be the leader too.
	Not always the same things and so on.
	But she needs to look up to you just as you need to look up to her.
	And if she had some crazy father...
	Every time he snapped his finger, she'd come running and she'd just abandon her family and do whatever he wanted and so on.
	You would say, I don't have any particular reliability or stability in my marriage because we've got crazy people running the show.
	Does that make sense? Yeah, it does.
	I mean, I have the big advantage that I live on a different continent than her, but it's true.
	She does manipulate me or attempt that.
	Well, yeah, but I mean, relocation can happen anytime.
	That's true. I mean, she forces herself to visit me.
	I'll tell you, like, my mom, she moved to the other end of the country.
	Well, actually, we kind of got her to move to the other end of the country.
	And I'm telling you, one day, I pick up the phone, and she says, I'm at the mall across the street.
	It can happen like that.
	Yeah, my mom did that once just to fuck with me.
	She called me and she said, oh, I'm waiting downstairs and I want to open the door for me.
	And then it turned out she wasn't there, but I got really upset with her.
	Oh, she just messed with your head that way?
	Yeah, she likes to fuck with me like that.
	That's pretty bad. Yeah, okay.
	So is a quality woman, is she going to want to get on that ride?
	No, not at all.
	Look, if you want to not stray too far from your, quote, roots or whatever, which I guess, given your religious conversion, is kind of already a done deal.
	But I would say that the woman you want to marry is going to be wise, smart, perceptive enough to map her entire future with your current family of origin.
	And if it's a choice, look, I hope it's not, and maybe therapy will work that out, but you can talk to your mom or whatever.
	But I just tell you, from my standpoint, it wasn't even...
	It wasn't even a tough call.
	It was like, okay, I knew the kind of women I was getting when my mom was in my life.
	I already had that down pat.
	I knew that one for sure.
	And then the woman I was able to get with my mom not in my life, oh my god, I've been with her for 20 years.
	How did you rip the band-aid off?
	Or did you just up and disappear?
	No, no, I didn't up and disappear, no.
	I'd never recommend that myself.
	I sat down and had long conversations with my family.
	Sat down with my mom on multiple occasions.
	Said, look, here's my issues. Here's what's going on.
	Here's what I'm thinking.
	Here's what I'm feeling. What are we going to do?
	Here's what I remember. And I sat across from her in her apartment.
	And I saw that look come into her eye, that cunning look.
	Shit, I'm caught. What can I get away with?
	Nothing to do with what was best for me.
	Nothing to do with any kind of sacrifice.
	What can I admit to without getting into too much trouble?
	How can I get out of this without...
	Admitting too much, but if I don't admit anything, then I could lose them.
	Just that calculation, that calculation that some people have, which has nothing to do with ethics, but what can I get away with, right?
	If the security camera's off, they'll shoplift.
	If it's on, they won't. It's just circumstances and survivability.
	So, yeah, I mean, I had multiple conversations.
	I, of course, was in therapy for three hours a week and really working hard with a therapist.
	So, no, I think the ghosting stuff is, you know, if there's any chance to have a conversation and any chance to salvage things or any chance to know exactly what's going on or why, I think that's well worth pursuing, if that makes sense.
	Right. Yeah, I mean, I did try to have certain conversations.
	I started with the small stuff, actually, but I always get these incredibly violent or manipulative reactions.
	Okay, okay. So, you say, I would like to have a conversation, right?
	And if you get these violent or manipulative reactions, so what are the consequences of her being violent with you?
	I usually withdraw and I just don't...
	So I have two examples.
	One where I... No, but you're still in a relationship with her, right?
	Yeah. Okay, so I'm sorry.
	I don't mean to skip past the details, but what I'm saying is that if she can just be violent towards you and you still stay in a relationship with her...
	Obviously, she doesn't have an internal moral standard that says don't be violent with people.
	So if she doesn't have the internal standard and there are no negative external consequences, the behavior will not change.
	I guarantee you, absolutely, the behavior will not change.
	It's like a rock bouncing down a hill.
	If nothing interferes with its path, it'll just bounce to the bottom.
	It's physics. If people don't have internal moral standards and there are no negative external consequences, their behavior will continue.
	Guaranteed, absolutely. It would be insane to think it wouldn't because that would be like, I don't know, random motion in the brain or something like that just completely replace the personality.
	So if it's working for her, she will continue to do it.
	Yeah, I think I'm the first person in my entire family, so that also includes extended family like uncles and aunts and so on, to just stand up to her.
	At various points.
	Now, it might not be at the level that you just described.
	Well, you're pushing back.
	But there are no absolutes, right?
	So for me, it's like, well, nobody gets to raise their voice at me.
	Like, nobody gets to call me names.
	Nobody gets to raise their voice at me in my life, right?
	I mean, the Internet's a different matter.
	They can't control that. But I can control who's in my life, right?
	And these are just the standards.
	They're not unreasonable standards. I don't say nobody can ever criticize me.
	Totally reasonable standards. You can't yell at me, and you can't call me names.
	Obviously, you can't hate me or anything.
	So these are totally reasonable standards.
	You know, these are standards I have at work.
	Don't scream at people and call them names, right?
	It'd be crazy, right? They're totally reasonable standards.
	And if people don't want to conform to those standards, you know, it's free will, man.
	Perfectly free to do that. But not with me.
	Not in my vicinity.
	Like, being in my presence is a privilege.
	Just as me being in the presence of other people I respect is a privilege, I don't just take that for granted or think it's just people can do whatever the hell they want.
	You've got to have standards, right? You would have them in business, right?
	If you have a salesman who doesn't sell anything, right?
	Or if you have a salesman who abuses your customers, you don't keep him in the company, right?
	And I don't keep people in my company, not my business, but me in my personal life.
	No, they said just, you know, no, you can't yell at me.
	No, you can't. I mean, ideally, you know, loyalty and all the things that I think I provide in a relationship and so on, but...
	You've just got to have those basic standards.
	And if people don't want to conform to them, they're perfectly free to not do that.
	But, I mean, for myself, I'm not going to have someone in my life who yells at me, calls me names, or is abusive or violent.
	What the fuck would I? I mean, I had to have that when I was a kid because I was a kid.
	Now I'm a man. Full-grown man, right?
	Why on earth would I let something continue that's horrible and negative when I have a choice?
	I mean, I had to when I was a kid because I had no choice in the family I was born into.
	But as an adult, the whole point of becoming an adult is to have your own standards, not have them imposed by circumstance.
	All right. Listen, I'm going to stop here because I'm afraid to have another thing coming up.
	Well, thanks a lot. Listen, I appreciate the question about your job.
	Obviously, that's a choice that, to me, would be less pressing than, how am I going to become a dad?
	How am I going to become a husband?
	How am I going to become a family man?
	To me, I mean, I love family life.
	I love being a dad. I love being a husband.
	I love monogamy. I love marriage in ways I could barely even express.
	And for me, the choice to be with crappy people from my past or glorious people in my present, I'm just really glad I made the choice that I did.
	So I would strongly recommend thinking about that for people as a whole.
	If you meet someone and you want to talk about it, I'm obviously available and would be happy to chat.
	Thanks everyone so much.
	A great pleasure to chat.
	A great honor to have these conversations with you.
	I really appreciate the trust and have yourselves a wonderful afternoon.
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