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July 13, 2019 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux
01:02:47
Shocking Misogynist Attacks Feminism, Defends Rape Culture
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Thank you.
It's kind of late in the day.
How's everyone doing?
Do we need to move around a little?
Get the blood flowing a little?
You guys can hear me.
I'd like to move around a bit because that messes up the camera people.
Which way am I going?
Well, thanks everyone for coming out.
You guys can hear me okay?
Yeah.
So, I was upstairs and somebody asked me today, they said, are you a men's rights activist?
Which is something I'd actually not really thought about before.
And what popped into my head was, it's like going to a doctor and saying, do you treat cholera?
We take on all illnesses here, if you're a doctor.
If you're a philosopher, your enemy is evil.
A lot of philosophers don't like to talk about it, but it is the case that your enemy is evil if you're a philosopher.
And there is evil, of course, in what the men's rights movement is trying to expose and oppose.
So I guess you could say, as a doctor treats cholera, I am a men's rights activist. - All right. - Now evil is one slippery bastard, which is why it's still here.
It goes through the ductwork.
It's like Ripley in Aliens.
It crawls up your leg.
It's in your jam.
It's everywhere.
And the real challenge of evil is that you can't ever really fight it.
Because the moment everyone recognizes something as evil, It's done!
The great challenge is in the definitions of evil and the communications of those definitions, which is what I'm going to talk about today.
And by the way, I know it's been like a long afternoon of listening, hands up, throw words out, ask questions, let's make this a dialogue, otherwise I might as well be, you know, on YouTube, right?
Where I look even younger.
Try me in 240p, I'm like 28.
It's beautiful.
So the challenge is always in the definition, right?
How many people here are like, yay slavery?
Alright, those t-shirts are not going to sell.
Now why are we not yay slavery?
For a long time people were.
In the middle of the 19th century in the south, only two people in a hundred were pro-slavery.
Now you can't find anybody who's pro-slavery, because the definition has been expanded, right?
The definition of humanity has expanded to include those formerly slaves, including my Irish ancestors.
And now we don't have a debate about slavery anymore.
There is slavery still in the world, but nobody defends it.
That is the challenge.
The challenge is the definition.
Once people understand that something is immoral, they react against it.
Sorry, I thought you were cutting in.
Now we'll do a duet.
So it's all about the definitions.
Once people see something is evil, they will act against it.
They will reject it.
You know, the most dangerous diseases are the ones that fool your immune system into thinking, hey, this guy's a friend, let's let him multiply.
You want your immune system to say, kill, die, die, die, die to everything that is going to kill, die, die you.
I don't want to be overly technical.
I'm not a doctor.
But the definition is everything.
So, when people talk about something like circumcision, it doesn't sound too bad.
Circumspect.
Circumnavigate.
Circumvent?
I guess it's kind of a venting, right?
But what we don't do is define it correctly.
What's the correct definition?
Genital mutilation.
A little tougher to sell.
Would you like your son to be circumcised?
I don't know, maybe.
Would you like your son to be genitally mutilated?
What is this, the opening of a horror movie?
You go for help.
I'll follow the bloody footprints.
So the definitions are essential.
It is male genital mutilation.
Contributes to a wide variety of health problems.
Do you know if you are circumcised you have, hey, five times the chance to have erectile dysfunction as an adult?
Right?
Thirty percent of men across the world have this done to them.
Far more That has happened to women.
It is a third of the skin of the penis that is removed.
It contributes to discomfort for women on the receiving end of sex because, I mean, the whole point of the foreskin is so that there's some give, right?
It's not a broomstick.
So, it contributes massively To expenses, of course.
And, do you know what the price is of an intact man?
A couple hundred bucks.
Amazing, amazing, amazing.
So check this out.
Used to be that the government covered the costs of circumcision.
And then they decided not to.
Anybody know what happened to circumcision rates?
Yeah, they dropped by almost half.
Because people are like, oh, 200 bucks?
200 bucks?
Well, shit.
I mean, I've got some standards, thank you very much.
A lifetime of male sexual pleasure.
10% complications arising from this absolutely unnecessary hacking of a human being.
No, that doesn't stir our sympathy, because you see, that's male pleasure.
And if we train men to actually enjoy life, they're bad workhorses.
And it was, you know, the Christian world was largely, it lay fallow for many hundreds of years.
And then in the 19th century, this may come as a shock to most of the members of the audience, but sometimes men masturbate.
All I'm saying is you're lucky there are cameras on me now.
All I'm saying is you're lucky there are cameras on me now.
There's a reason I shoot waist up at home.
I'm itchy. - Sweet!
Kind of true, I guess.
And there was this desperate fear that men would enjoy, you know, alone time.
And so, one of the ways that they wanted to Cut that out, I suppose, was by cutting it off, right?
This is one of the ways in which men were not supposed to touch themselves, was by reducing sensual pleasure, but through circumcision we were supposed to be saved from the evils of self-abuse and the, you know, because I guess there weren't enough hairy palms to show everyone who was doing it, so they had to find another way.
In the definitions lies the solution.
Once you define something as an illness, once you define something morally as an evil, then people react against it.
Right?
Would you like me to save your child from a 1 in 111 chance of having a urinary tract infection?
Did you know that little girls get urinary tract infections too?
Did you know they actually treat that, not by sawing off the labia, but with antibiotics?
Because little girls, little girls live in the 21st century!
Little boys are medieval!
Well, it doesn't take in men, so...
Or one in 1,437 chance of penile cancer, which I hear you can also get from watching Nancy Grace, but that's another statistic.
I actually have nothing against Nancy Grace.
When I thought of penile cancer, I thought of some psychiatrist who's going to email and say, I can explain all of that for you.
Or they just give up and say Medicaid.
Right, so you have a 1 in 1,437 chance of developing penile cancer.
You can reduce that slightly if you get circumcised, if you get genitally mutilated.
Anyone know odds of breast cancer?
For a woman?
One in eight.
You know, you line up eight boobs in a row, one of them is gonna turn homicidal. - You've had those dreams, right?
It's not... I was raised by a German mother, so... That's eight out of eight.
That's another story.
But we don't, of course, say to little girls, well, we've got to remove your breasts.
Because...
Oh, but you see, babies don't remember it.
Right.
And similarly, you'll all hear feminists say, well, if the woman is unconscious when she's raped, she doesn't remember it.
So what's the problem?
I'm going to be taking it out of context.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
There's a nice slice for someone to... It doesn't matter, does it?
Paul, I'll be joining your... Give him a few more!
The Out of Context Club.
If you play the next part backwards... No, it is.
And of course the body does remember, do you know that babies who are circumcised, boys who are circumcised, have elevated levels of the stress hormone cortisol six months afterwards.
Almost half of circumcisions are done without anesthetic.
There was a study that they tried to do circumcisions on boys to test a variety of anesthetics, but they had to stop it because it was inhumane.
So, inhumane to study it.
No problem to do it.
And for the most of the remaining one where there's anesthetic, it's a topical anesthetic.
You know, like the kind you use for bug bites and stuff like that?
That's one bastard of a mosquito, I'll tell you that.
So this is the definitions, this is the clarity.
Now, I want to make a case for something here that will be interesting.
And again, feedback, comments, all perfectly welcome.
So I was listening to a Canadian government broadcaster called CBC.
And they had a feminist on, so I deployed my airbags.
Got myself into the de-stress position.
Actually, that's just fetal position, sucking my thumb, but I won't do that here.
And I was like, okay, hit me!
Hit me with the crazy!
Come on, baby!
And I'm telling you, she did not disappoint me.
Not even a bit.
Not even a bit.
So I need a prop for this part.
Okay, so have you ever heard of something called microaggressions?
Now microaggressions, I thought they were referring to my schoolyard fighting technique, which went sort of like this.
You know, imagine a Tyrannosaurus Rex falling over while having an epileptic attack.
Somewhat similar.
But apparently not.
Now, microaggressions are when men-- - Breathe. - I was gonna say fart, 'cause sometimes it just feels like-- Hey, all livestock fart.
That's why we have global warming.
But anyway, okay.
So this is what is called microaggressions according to this feminist.
Okay, now imagine like I'm in a subway.
Not the shop, like a subway car, right?
Okay.
No microaggressions yet?
Wait.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
Wait.
Hands up when any women feel aggressed against me.
Or men.
Ah!
Ah, there you go!
Now, I've seen women do this in a scud, and I feel quite aggressive again sometimes, especially if they've got a lady garden like a New York pizza slice.
But anyway, okay, so that is microaggression.
If you are a man and you apparently sprawl in a subway, this is a microaggression towards A woman.
And she feels, like, very sensitive to that.
And you probably have heard of the YesAllWomen hashtag.
You know, man whistled.
A man made appreciative comments about the tight dress I was in.
Whatever, right?
But that's just my hashtag.
I don't know what the women said.
So these are the microaggressions that women experience that they're very sensitive to.
Male aggression.
Okay.
You know, the best way to defeat idiocy is just listen to them, and just repeat it back.
And so I would like to sort of explain something about microaggressions, because in the same interview with this feminist, she said, well men are just, you know, they have this aggression, this violence, this aggression, and women, we can't do anything about it.
You know, the only way to solve this aggression is for men to discuss amongst themselves how to close their legs on a subway, how to not impose upon women, reduce the breathing that the lady talked about.
And then men can talk about themselves, because where does male violence come from?
Let's just assume that there's male violence.
Obviously there is, not all men, but there is male violence.
So where does it come from?
Well, according to this woman, and this is a pretty common view among feminists, there are, look closely, like dust in the air, like dust in the wind, there are these Male-only memes that float around the culture that are generated by men with no input from women.
They float around the culture and they go into your ears or up your nose and they make you violent, right?
So there are these memes, these ideas, these cultures that men inhabit and inhabit men and make them violent.
And women have nothing to do with it whatsoever in any way, shape, or form.
Men have to solve it completely on their own.
All right.
So when I was studying, I have a master's in history, focused on the history of philosophy, and one of the great writers for clear thinking is Voltaire.
I don't know if you've ever read him, but if you haven't, Right after this court.
Now, there was a tradition that he was part of in 18th century France, which was like the blank slate of human nature.
So, you know, they went over to the New World, they found all of these, quote, savages, right?
And they then brought them back to the court.
And a lot of people wrote about the view of the French court from a savage who'd never seen it before, and, you know, and it was one way that they communicated how insane and absurd the monarchy was.
So, I like the blank slate.
Approach.
Let's just talk about male violence from a space alien's perspective, right?
So, woo woo woo woo, you know, we're floating through space and you go, oh, gotta go and check out Earth.
Mostly harmless, right?
So, gotta check out Earth.
And you go to Earth and you say, wow, there's quite a bit of violence here.
Wars and predations and aggressions and all this, rapes and terrible stuff that occurs.
Okay.
Where does it come from?
This is where you can throw some stuff at.
Where do you think violence comes from?
I don't buy the human nature argument.
I just don't.
Because the only thing that's common about human beings is how great we are at adapting.
Right?
I mean, Muslim kids adapt to the Muslim culture.
Pennsylvanian kids adapt to Pennsylvanian culture.
Amish kids adapt to... It's like saying, what is human nature?
It's like saying, what is the shape of water?
It depends what you pour it into.
It adapts to that, right?
So where do you guys think violence comes from?
Last resort of powerlessness.
Frustration.
Last resort of powerlessness.
Last resort of powerlessness. - Yes.
I'm being aggressed against by this bastard.
What was the other one?
Fear?
Yeah?
We'll be coming back to you, young lady.
Okay, yeah, so you would do the research, right?
And you would say, well, where does violence in human society come from?
Well, the research is pretty clear.
Which means completely ignored by most of humanity.
Ninety percent of a child's brain is formed by its experiences in the first four to five years of life.
And violence is when the fight-or-flight mechanism is activated early.
Right deep down in the amygdala, the fight-or-flight mechanism kicks up.
Cortisol and adrenaline and all of that gets provoked in a child.
And if the child is chronically stimulated with aggression or abandonment, then the child Develops a more violent brain, a brain more prone to violence.
Less capacity to inhibit the impulse.
You know, you ever had that, you get this surge of anger, you actually have about one quarter of one second to stop that beast.
Right?
I mean, you've got to intercept what's happening in your brain, and that knowledge of your own capacity for aggression, which I think we all mostly have, being able to intercept it is something that is modeled.
My parents treating you respectfully and all that, and controlling their own impulses and so on.
So you'd say, okay, we've got this problem called violence, and we have the science which says where it comes from, which is basically the first couple of years of a child's life.
Well, my next question as the space alien would be, okay, if violence comes from childhood, early childhood in particular, why who is in charge of early childhood?
50-50 chance.
Give me a guess.
Yes, it's the ladies who are in charge of childhood.
Now look, I'm gonna give you guys the respect of knowing that you're over three years old and to recognize that there are exceptions to everything I'm saying.
Right?
I'm a stay-at-home dad, so yes, I'm an exception, blah, blah, blah, right?
I know that you guys can hear that most Asians are short without saying, I know a tall Asian, right?
I understand that, right?
We're talking in generalities, there are exceptions, blah, blah, blah, blah, right?
So, women are in charge from conception onwards, right?
The women ingest the right food or not, they smoke, they don't, they have wine, they don't.
Indigestation, right?
They give birth and then they choose to keep the child or they, I mean, keep the child around them, they stay home, they breastfeed or they don't, and so on.
Or they put their kids in daycare where, guess what?
A lot of women around, right?
I worked as a Assistant teacher in the daycare for a couple years when I was younger, and yeah, I mean it was, uh, you know, quite the boo-fest.
I mean, it was just women everywhere.
So naturally, like, all the kids of single, like, no dad, they just, you know, father figure!
So, women stay home with the kids, or they put them in daycare where it's nothing but women, but then the children go to school.
Women there too, right?
95% of primary school teachers are women, right?
So maybe around grade 10 or grade 11 they might, you know, run into a man, right?
And say, like, hey, you a woman in drag?
So basically you have an almost universal control over childhood from women, right?
Are you beginning to see the full cannonball of crazy that I got in the face from this woman complaining about male aggression and microaggressions that women have absolutely nothing to do with, can't do anything to solve, have no responsibility for?
Violence is formed in childhood.
Women control childhoods.
And our desperate hope as moralists, as people who want a better world, is to break the cycle of violence.
We're only ever five years away from an absolute paradise of a planet.
From a planet where we're meeting here for a hoedown, not fighting more corruption and craziness and immorality.
Five years!
If we could just get people to be nice to their babies for five years straight, that would be it for war, drug abuse, addiction, promiscuity, sexually transmitted diseases.
Almost all would be completely eliminated because they all arise from dysfunctional early childhood experiences, which are all run by women.
Okay, so then the feminists would say, well, yes, okay, it's true that... Maybe it's true that women... Okay, they wouldn't admit that.
Sorry, that's fact-based.
I'm just trying to get into the... into that mindset.
Sexist!
Woman-hater!
No, no, that's not good.
Take down the patriarchy.
But they would say, well, the men are bad, right?
The women are abandoned by the men, and blah, blah, blah.
I'd say, okay, well, the space alien, right?
Woo, woo, we got a little thing on forehead on here, so we're gonna say, okay, well, if women are saying that the problem's in early childhood or man's fault, you bastards, well, we'd say, okay, as a space alien, I would say, well, who chooses who in the dating game?
Hands up if you're a man being asked out for a date on a woman where she paid.
You?
I need you to take off your pants, sir.
She must have seen you in a speedo and thought, I need something from the eavesdrop.
I can step up.
Okay, so you, June, what happened?
Can you tell me the story?
Am I the only person?
You are the only person.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Go ahead.
A dentist met me and she invited me out to dinner the first time we went on a date.
Was it something like this?
Drill, baby, drill.
It was nothing like that.
She'd gotten breast augmentation surgery and those were for me, but... Okay, so you were asked out by a woman.
Did she pay?
She did.
You slut.
Good for you.
Anybody else?
Yes sir?
Alright.
Give us your secrets.
How are you a man whore?
Tell me.
She was German?
Good for you.
Anybody else?
Yes, sir.
All right.
Give us your secrets.
How are you a man whore?
Tell me.
I just said she was German.
She was German?
So she ordered you out?
No, I'm sorry.
You made me proud!
Sorry.
Call me Mistress Panzer.
Wow, we got a... I wonder, was she from the Philippines by any chance?
now that she was trying to assert authority of a relationship right?
A passionate affair that lasted for about nine months.
Wow, we've got a bunch of people here.
Was she from the Philippines by the way?
It's the same woman.
Alright.
So, I mean, it's one or two percent, and studies show that about 95% of the time men ask women out, right?
Women make themselves look attractive, and again, I'm generalizing, but women make themselves look attractive in the hopes that men will ask them out, and they get to choose from the waving, grabbing penis things around them, right?
Eeny, meeny, miney, right?
So, this is the goal, right?
This is what happens.
Now, have you ever been, I mean, once in my life, I was like, A couple of employers wanted to hire me at the same time.
Have you ever been on the receiving end of a bidding war?
Yes.
Yeah?
It's sweet, right?
Yes.
Oh, man, you just wake up, you're floating on air, you can't do anything wrong, you don't need to shower anymore because people want you.
It's great.
You don't have to show up to work in pants anymore.
I mean, I hear you, brother, I'm there.
It's a beautiful thing.
It's a beautiful thing.
You know?
Alarm needed, baby.
So I actually had this once.
This is back in the dot-com days in the 90s.
I was in a bidding war.
And it got to the point where people were like, I'll pay you $150,000 a year for three days work a week.
And I'm like, no, I'm going to write novels.
Because that's where the money is.
Anyway, so if you're on the receiving end of a bidding war, it's a pretty sweet place to be.
And for the majority of women of, you know, attractiveness, personality, or physical whatever, they're on the receiving end of usually multiple offers, right?
And this is always confusing to me when women complain about the men that they have.
Because, well, you get to test drive, right?
I mean, for years you get to choose from a variety of cars.
You get to test drive cars for years.
You finally Pick a car that usually pays you to buy it and then you get to drive the car and then you say, this car sucks.
I'm going to make a boat.
You know, you could have just picked a boat to begin with.
No, I'm going to change it.
There's dockyards right there.
So, if women choose the man and get to test drive the man and get to marry the man and stay with the man and have children with the man and so on, it's kind of speechless to say, well, all the problems in my life arise from this guy. - Oh, man.
Right?
You see, this is, again, space-alien time, right?
We're just trying to really detract ourselves from the minutiae of the propaganda that so often bewilders us, right?
So, here we have, just to recap, the problem of human violence.
Of course in early childhood.
Women are in charge of early childhood.
Women choose the men with whom they're going to have children.
Right?
So, how do we break the cycle of violence?
Lecturing men is ridiculous.
I mean, factually, scientific.
Lecturing men is ridiculous.
There is zero patriarchy for children.
Right?
Again, give or take, right?
But this is why when women are complaining about microaggressions and women saying, well, we have nothing to do with the cycle of violence.
There's nothing we can do.
You men got to work it out amongst yourselves.
It's like, we needed the space invasion just to, you know, Klingons to come down and say, here's the facts that we see from orbit because you're all confused down here.
A study was recently done.
So a psychologist went and he said, I'd really like to study verbal aggression within the household.
Right?
I'd like to shake this bottle and open the top.
So he went to daycares and he asked the parents, they were all women, right?
I think there was one man.
But he asked the parents, he says, do you yell at your children?
And they all said basically, yeah.
Yeah, hell yeah.
Right?
They make me.
And so what he did was he put little recording devices on them.
You know, like he's some stalked man.
He puts some recording devices on them.
And then he just said, you know, just turn it on, record, you know, every day for a week.
And then he got them back.
And he also asked them some other questions.
So there was one man out of the many men.
It was all women, basically.
And the women said, yeah, I yelled at them, and I guess I hit my kids maybe 18 times a year.
You know, whatever, right?
So he got the data back, and this is middle class, this is not like right down in the dregs, this is like middle class, you know, comfortable, and all that kind of stuff.
So this is probably less than it is in reality.
Anybody want to guess?
Instead of 18 times a year hitting children, what does anybody want to put a finger on the number at?
I haven't had enough coffee to do whatever those guys do.
The white wrap of livestock sales.
900?
It was 932.
932 times a year.
- 900. - 900?
It was 932. - Wow. - 932 times a year.
Does anyone want to guess the age ranges of the children?
I can tell you this, it was not 18 year old sons.
It's one thing to do this, it's another thing to do this.
I remember my mummy yelling at me when I was like 17.
Remember all that food you gave me?
It's coming back!
Anyone want to guess what the bottom age of the children That were being hit 932 times a year.
Lower, babies.
Lower.
Seven months.
Seven months of age.
All it is is abuse.
I mean, even... The upper end was three, three and a half, close to four.
Seven months to four years old, these average American women were hitting their children 932 times per year.
We also know women hit sons two to three times more than their daughters.
Why was that only for women?
Did you test against men?
This is just the people who were at the daycare who the man had access to, the psychologist.
He's been on my show explaining the experiment.
You can look at it more... Oh, by the way, Freedom Aid Radio, not Freedom Radio.
Although that would be cool.
So, like, I really want to... I can't reinforce this enough.
Again, I know, super smart crowd and all that, but I really want you to get the insanity of this.
Right?
So, women saying, well, men have to just deal with their weird aggressions.
We have nothing to do with it.
We don't know where it comes from.
You know, we're helpless.
Helpless, I tell you.
Right?
If you were a little boy and you were being hit by a giant woman over 900 times a year, and it probably is closer to 1500, you average it out two to three times, 1500, 1750, something like that.
The study also showed that the hits occurred within 30 seconds of a conflict beginning.
Not a lot of reasoning going on.
Right?
I mean, that's not a cop pulling you over.
That's shooting the tires out.
I mean, that's you driving past.
I mean, there's not any kind of negotiation that's happening here.
Violence begins in early childhood.
as the result of abuse.
Women are in charge of early childhood.
Women are hitting children 900 plus times a year after 30 seconds of a conflict beginning.
You don't have to be like Klingon Sherlock Holmes to crack this case, right?
Where does violence come from?
And this is why Let's go back to our... Okay.
So over here, I'd like you to picture billions of women hitting children hundreds of times a year.
Not even counting yelling at them.
Not even counting putting them in daycares.
Not even counting neglect or abandonment.
Not even counting keeping their fathers away.
Let's just talk about the hitting.
932 times a year.
That is not talked about.
You know what is talked about?
The difference between this and this.
Okay.
Rape culture.
Wait.
Okay.
Evil.
Okay.
Patriarch!
Oh, sorry.
Right?
But you see how insane this is?
You have women pounding the crap out of seven-month-old babies.
And all we ever hear about is, well, aggression and violence is just some bizarre male issue that women have nothing to do with.
This is what I mean when I say, like, the space alien perspective will strip you of friends.
Will strip you of any opportunity for a civilized discussion with muggles, right?
I mean, because... The way society is, and the cases that are put forward by people, is so mad.
So then, again, space alien time, we're saying, well, what's the solution?
The solution to violence, of course, would be a couple of things.
We had speakers up here talking about, let's have dads around more.
Absolutely.
Two key things for the development of a child's empathy.
One, a father around.
Two, free play in nature.
Anyone know why the second one is?
It's kind of interesting.
Anyone guess?
It'll have to be the older people, because the young people, free play in nature is like oblivion at high res.
Yes, sir?
When you have age mixing of children in free play, they in a sense teach one another about the need to please one another, because if they don't, Their playmates run away.
They have to please within the group.
Yeah, like so when I was, I grew up broke in England and we basically were like, we all hang out and it's like, well what do you want to do?
We had to find something that wins for everyone, that everyone wants to do.
And you have to sacrifice, you have to defer, and all that kind of stuff.
You can't just impose your will.
Everybody's on their iPads, they're not negotiating, right?
So there is a huge correlation between free play in nature, the presence of fatherhood, and Empathy, which is the most important natural resource in the world, and which is becoming increasingly in short supply.
Sociopathy, which is really the absence of empathy, has doubled over the last 15 years.
Yes, sir?
No adults.
- Are you referring to perhaps a different play style with the child between the two types? - No adults, that's all it is.
Not out there in a soccer field, no structure.
Go play, unsupervised, no adults, no structure, figure out what you want to do.
Go, come home when the street lights come on, right?
Stay away from windowless areas.
And when my ex-wife, excuse me, my ex-wife now, when she would play with the child, be very formalized and nothing free about it, really.
Whereas when I played with my kid, it was like, freestyle, hey, have fun, let's kick a ball.
No, if you're there, that's great.
That's part of the empathy.
That I don't know the exact reason, maybe we could theorize about it, but I don't know the exact reason why the presence of men is better for empathy.
I personally think that it's because women grow these beasts in their belly, you know, and as far as I remember from the movie, they come out through the belly button and kill John Hurt.
But I think women are, too, so fused with the kids, right?
I mean, they grow them and then they breastfeed them and they're so fused.
And I think the fathers have a little bit Productive space, right?
The closeness and the intimacy is fantastic for the moms and the babies, but the dads have a little bit more space, a little bit more room to negotiate.
Yeah, like that, like the space aliens.
Excellent.
Dads are like space aliens.
You get that?
Get that out of context, too.
Okay.
And if you're John Hurt, you're toast.
Do you know if there's any research on the effects of helicopter parenting that many women today are engaging in on the ability for children to engage in free play?
Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of effects.
I mean, it generally provokes passivity and, again, a lack of negotiation.
You know, children are much safer than they used to be out in the world.
And we have all of these weird ideas, right?
Like if the kids are out playing in the neighborhood, that's dangerous.
No, no, no, no, no.
That's not statistically the way it is.
You know, if they're going to be attacked, it's going to be somebody in the family.
It's going to be somebody who's a friend.
It's not going to be some guy in a Wing Dollars van driving.
So we have to be able to keep the kids home and safe.
And that way I know where they are.
Where the moms are hitting the guy 132 times a year.
I need you to be safe!
Don't go out!
We need to give, like, micro tasers to kids or something like that.
But yeah, I mean, so, the violence is occurring within the home.
And, you know, violence has been diminishing in a lot of ways.
There's some arguments, a variety of arguments as to why that is.
I think some of it has to do with the fact that kids are put in institutions, which is bad in a lot of ways.
Like, children put into daycare before the age of four, for more than 20 hours a week, experience exactly the same symptoms as maternal abandonment.
Right?
And so you get this radical detachment disorder, which creates instability, neediness, aggression, lack of compliance, and all those kinds of things.
And so, but at least in those institutions, they're not getting hit 932 times a year.
No, I think in general, I think for the most, again, U.S.
schools are a little different, right?
Because I know in U.S.
schools, a lot of them, South schools in particular, corporal punishment is still acceptable.
I think it's 18 or something like that states.
But most daycares, at least none of the ones I worked in, I mean, you couldn't, right?
Not that we were all dying to, but you couldn't, right, attack the kids that way, so they would be hit a lot less, and that may have had something to do with it.
Was there another question over there?
Being the daughter of a single mom, and just reading about, having worked around single moms, and just reading about what they deal with, they just have so much stress.
And I think an important factor in your discussion is just when you're a mom, and you're around your child all the time, and you're around a small child, and it's just very, very stressful.
I've just done some reading about, like, there's articles about, you know, single moms and stress and all that kind of stuff, and they list all the things that can ease the stress in a single mom's life.
And I go on down the list, and I read and read, and not one of them mentioned anything about involving the father.
And it's like, why?
Because the father, you know, It takes two to tango, and the father ought to be there.
He ought to be, well, responsible.
But it doesn't take two to tango, because women choose mates.
Right, right.
Again, if there's rape, that's a whole different situation and so on.
So first of all, it takes two to tango.
Women still are in the privileged position of choosing from a variety of suitors in general.
That's the first.
The second, the stress argument bothers me.
And, you know, you could be correct, but I'll tell you why it bothers me, and we can certainly open it up to discussion.
There's no stress defense for hitting your wife.
Right?
You don't have to say, wow, boy, she was nagging me!
You know what I'm saying?
You know, there's no state of mind excuse for male violence.
And, as I've talked about on my show many times, Feminists will talk about abuse of power disparities.
I mean, unless it's Bill Clinton.
Feminists will talk about abuse of power disparities like the boss dating the secretary or the man keeping money away from his stay-at-home wife.
Because there's a power disparity there.
Of course, in reality, and in fact, there's no greater power disparity than between parent and child.
A wife chose to be there.
Children don't choose their families.
They're not there by choice.
Wives can leave at any time.
Legal rights, property, independence, shelters.
Children cannot leave.
So I can't go with women are stressed And therefore, because there's no state of mind that excuses male violence, not that I've ever heard.
And you'll see this when you look online.
Whenever people talk about women's abuses, they will almost always put in an excuse.
Well, they're poor.
Well, they're stressed.
Well, they're juggling work and family.
Well, they don't have help and resources and this and that and the other, right?
But again, I've never heard that from men hitting anybody.
Thank you.
I think what I was really trying to say is, in the literature that I read about single moms and stress, I think what would really help would be if they just acknowledged that I think what would really help would be if they just acknowledged that since man is half of the reason why the child is there,
You know, we're all... they're just as interdependent on the fact that they need the father, they need him to be around, and it's... you have to adopt the mindset of a team worker, you know?
Well, but if they chose a man who's not around, then they're still responsible for that choice.
Again, I'm not taking men out of the equation completely, right?
But the woman is currently the gatekeeper, right?
Because the woman is the one who suffers a lot more of a pregnancy than an irresponsible man.
Right?
Now, historically, what used to happen, prior to the welfare state, was a woman who got pregnant outside of wedlock, we all know what would happen, right?
They would go on a vacation, they would give birth to the child, they would return to the family without the child, and the child would be given up for adoption.
Which was in the best interest of the child, statistically.
Because children who were adopted into two-parent households do just fine.
They do just fine relative to everybody else who's born there.
Statistically, there's no difference.
But, women who keep the children as single mothers harm those children.
It's an incredibly selfish and destructive thing to do if you don't have a husband, if you chose the wrong guy.
To keep the child is abusive, almost always.
And that's what used to happen before women could force all men to become beta male providers through the power of the state.
And that's what should.
For the best interest of the child, give it up for adoption.
You've already proven that you're irresponsible, that you can't choose the right guy, can't keep your legs closed, and can't use birth control, of which there are 18 different kinds.
So maybe parenthood isn't for you.
I mean, at least yet.
You know, work on tying the shoes.
Yes, sir.
So, bringing your talk full circle.
No, we're not done yet, brother.
You hold on to those splatters while I'm close.
What I'm wondering is, I've looked for a study like this and I haven't seen one, but it certainly makes sense just from observing different countries in the world.
I'm wondering, is there any data looking at the amount of violence in a society, particularly male violence, military aggressions, things of that nature, And circumcision rate.
It certainly makes sense if you have increased stress hormones shortly after birth, if you have a culture of violence to men immediately.
The problem is that you can't just separate one variable.
Where there is circumcision, there is generally more brutality towards children and more brutality towards boys in particular.
So you can't just look at circumcision and say that's... It's not like everything's the same but circumcision.
It's a symptom of a wider disregard for the thoughts and feelings of men and boys.
So, certainly you can... I've been reading an audiobook by Lloyd DeMoss called The Origins of War and Child Abuse, which is available at freedomainradio.com slash free.
It's a free audiobook and that's where he talks about how war comes directly out of and is directly correlated to levels of child abuse.
So, I think accepting that circumcision is male genital mutilation, it's certainly going to be part of the fire that burns the world.
Listen, um, I just had a look at my speech notes.
We're only half done.
I'm kidding.
I got five more minutes.
Um... That's good stuff.
Anyway, um... The end!
Q&A?
No, don't you guys want to, uh, have any questions?
Because I don't want to miss that part.
Hi.
I know you said something earlier about there's always exceptions, but as a licensed daycare provider for 25 years and foster mom for 10 and a loving and non-violent mother, I just want to acknowledge that there are moms that don't hit children and there are some excellent daycare providers out there.
Absolutely.
I'm married to one.
We've never raised her voice, we've never punished, we've never hit, and she's a fantastically wonderful child.
You know, when you don't have violence, you get creativity, right?
And if you don't have, well, I'll hit my kid, then you have to figure out creative solutions, as you know, right?
And that's a lot more fun as parents.
You know, why are single moms so stressed?
Well, if they're hitting their kids 932 times a year, the relationship sucks.
They have no authority.
They only have force.
That's a very stressful situation to be in.
You're constantly playing whack-a-mole.
Turns out in the study that the behavior that the moms hit the kids for was resumed in less than 10 minutes.
Less than ten.
It doesn't work.
All it does is vent the sadism of the moment.
We have a question?
I'm Taylor.
I was curious... You gotta do some Barry White for me, man.
That's a beautiful voice.
I get that a lot.
The sound of rock and roll.
You're gonna make me burp with that bass, man.
It's testosterone.
There you go.
It's a wonderful day in the patriarchy.
Now, I was curious, with circumcision, is there any data that shows the percentage of circumcisions that are seriously botched to the point of urinary or erectile dysfunction?
Thank you.
I do have those numbers.
Just come to me afterwards.
I normally do this with a PowerPoint, but I consider PowerPoint for the week.
Except for everyone else who did PowerPoint today.
I'll get you those numbers afterwards, but it's not insignificant for sure.
Yes, sir, in the back.
Hey, Stefan.
And I am also against, I don't have any children, but the things that you talk about, about child abuse really makes sense.
I think it's wrong for any type of spanking.
And one other thing I wanted to say that, you know, I talked to my mom about this.
And, you know, yeah, I was spanked.
But she came to the realization that, you know, that just like you did, you know, she chose...
To be in her situation, I didn't.
And she said that she actually apologized for that.
And it was just out of nowhere.
She just thought of it.
I don't know what she watched.
Maybe she watched a Freedom Inn radio show.
I don't know.
But another thing, I was doing research on this.
And if, you know, being a black man myself, I'll just accept it for what it is.
Is it true that when it comes to race, that when it comes to spanking your children, it's actually worse in the black community than other, you know, I mean, I'm not going to just say, you know, hey, it can't be true.
It can't be true.
I think it is true, statistically.
So I did this video on Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman, which, basically, I don't care that much about the case, but it was a great way to get a million people to see an anti-spanking message, and in it I included a clip of President Obama, which you may have seen, where he's talking about how, hey, remember the good old days when even if it wasn't your kid, if you saw them acting up, you hit them?
Like, you couldn't say that.
I don't think you could say that to, like, a white community, but he's in there, in a black community, and there is, of course, a lot more corporal punishment.
There's lots of reasons for that, some sociological, some historical, which I'm not, you know, gonna speak to, but I think a lot of it has to do with the prevalence of single motherhood as well, right?
So single motherhood is associated with higher rates of child abuse and of course much more single motherhood in the black community than the white community and even less in the Asian. - So on the subject of circumcision, feminists often say my body, my choice At what age do you think someone should be allowed my body, my choice?
Yeah, I mean, if it's a spleen that they're talking about, that's one thing, but that is a human life in there, and I think that should have a say as well.
But as far as adults go, I mean, I think we already have laws in place for that, that the age of consent for medical procedures is, I think, 18, or maybe it's 21 in some places.
But yeah, hey, if you want to go hack up your penis when you're an adult, You know, I'm an idiot, but go!
Then it is your body your choice, but you cannot make that choice for newborns.
It is symptomatic of the degree to which the idea of simply asking children what they want when they get bigger and deferring to their choice for men still remains somewhat...
Incomprehensible to a lot of people.
Like, why would the man have a say?
It's his penis, but it's our culture.
Yeah, yeah, how are we going to have soldiers if we don't brutalize kids?
Yeah, there's a reason why men are hit more times than women, because women need to train warriors to protect the tribe from blah blah blah, right?
Well, child abuse and civilization You know, I think true civilization is not that, right?
I mean, we've been talking just at the very beginning about the extension of human rights, human principles of morality to formerly ignored groups in society.
You know, whether it's minorities or women.
Well, the last one is kids, right?
I mean, the last way we need to extend ethics is kids, right?
You say spanking, it's just hitting.
It's kidnapping and hitting, because the kid can't leave.
It's assault.
And once we, as Confucius said, the beginning of wisdom is to call things by their proper names.
Once we identify it for what it is, then we recoil from it.
But whooping and spanking and blah blah blah, whatever it is, I mean, this all, you know, these aren't categories of crimes you'd ever associate with adultery.
My point is, you know, how are we going to get our warriors, how are we going to get soldiers that are sociopathic enough to go fight our warriors, which are apparently, according to our last speaker, There's no way around it.
We're going to have war.
Well, they've said that about all evil human institutions prior to their end.
Everyone says, this is going to last forever.
Oh, is it gone already?
I guess I was in the way, wasn't I?
Yes, sir?
Hang on.
I mean, all that circumcision is tied to religion.
So, did you take that into consideration, as well?
What do you mean, take that into consideration?
Well, in the sense that a lot of them who are religious believe that it's God asking them to do it.
True, absolutely.
And the Old Testament also commands them to kill homosexuals, unbelievers, witches, apostates, sorcerers, basically everybody else.
Right, and human sacrifice.
So, you know, to me, the first recorded depiction of circumcision was 2400 BC in Egypt.
That's your first clue that it's barbaric!
It's 2400 BC!
And they say, well, you know, that's tradition.
It's like, do you have a cell phone?
then you're willing to upgrade, aren't you?
Stefan.
Thank you everybody so much!
Can I ask a question?
Wait, wait, wait!
Sorry, sorry!
Can I tell you, not for the first time in my life I was a little premature.
Now let's get serious.
We just had Kathleen O'Wynn elected as the newly elected Premier of Ontario.
She has earmarked $1.5 billion to childcare or daycare.
I listened to you at the Toronto Domestic Violence Symposium and it really stuck in my head, out of all the things you said, the harm that children have by being put into daycare.
What can we do to deal with this issue?
Because I see it very concerning that we're going to put one and a half billion dollars, extra money, into sending these children.
I've seen them being strung along on ropes.
Oh yeah, no, I understand.
At two years of age, and it's appalling to me.
No, but it's good for the government, right?
Because if you get women to go into the workforce, you can tax them, right?
You can't tax moms, right?
So if you get women to go into the workforce, then you can tax two new groups of people, right?
You can tax the women who are now working, who formerly were providing childcare, and you can tax the childcare workers and get them into nice unions that will always vote for a bigger government, and blah blah blah, right?
So it's a great investment on the part of the government, Just as usual, it's at the expense of children.
So much of what we do in society, from the national debt to wars to the family court policies, is at the expense of children for the sake of irresponsible adults.
And we don't have a society as yet where the interests of children are put first and foremost.
It's just a Hallmark card we look at and then throw in the shredder.
Right, but if we were actually to realign our society and put the interests of children first and foremost, and think about that every time we tried to make a social decision, then we would say, well, what do children need?
Well, they need their moms or their dads, but you know, mom comes with the feeding bag, so it's usually better for them to be closer.
And so we want moms home with their children.
And so we would try and figure out a society which would allow for that.
And I'm a big one for...
Social shaming, social negative consequences is, to me, the best way society should be organized.
And when we get this, everything goes, single moms are heroes, everyone's fine, everyone's great, we end up with this multiplicity of rules.
There's an old statement which says, when you get rid of the big rules, you don't end up with no rules, you end up with an infinity of tiny rules.
And the big rules are, we should be responsible for our children, we should be responsible with our sexuality, we should have children in a committed pair-bond relationship, and we should not have children outside of that.
And if we make a mistake, and mistakes happen, Then we should give the child to people who can raise it in the best way for the child.
Now, everything which furthers that end, to me, would be advantageous to society, but people who are irresponsible always want to escape the consequences of their irresponsibility.
That's what we like to do, and with the government that gets to be hellishly easy, I think.
So, I think that there's a variety of policies which could be suggested, but I think that would be first and foremost.
"In the best interest of the child" should be a motto tattooed on our hearts, not bullshit said by the government that they never followed.
Before we take our last question, I would like to make a suggestion and offer I'd like to work with you to do something about this daycare business and the $1.5 billion of our tax dollars that shouldn't be used for that.
Well, actually, the bill is going to go to the kids.
They don't have $1.5 billion.
They're just borrowing it, right?
So, hey, we get to stuff you in daycares and stick you with the bill!
Great system!
Can I make a comment?
Yeah.
Thank you.
I stepped out so I might have missed this if I'm saying something that you already mentioned.
I'm sorry but there's media here and I'm very involved not just with the men's rights movement but with the intactivist movement.
And I think this is important to say because The American media tends to never really do their research on circumcision outside what you read in the U.S.
from the American medical associations and groups like that.
And that's where they get their information.
Of course, the American Medical Association is profit-based and they make a tremendous amount of money off of circumcision.
Recently, what I think media and everyone else here needs to know, that recently the Council of Europe Which is even larger than the European Union, it has about twice as many member nations, and is commissioned specifically to address human rights.
They held extensive debates and reviewed extensive literature on things like the trauma that it causes to children, as well as the loss of sensitivity, and all kinds of things about these so-called benefits and all that.
And they have voted that it violates the child's human rights.
And in fact, that it isn't comparable to female circumcision because there are several different types of female circumcision, one of which is the removal of the clitoral foreskin, which is anatomically equivalent to male circumcision.
And the media needs to know that when you write stories on circumcision, because the Council of Europe's decision was backed by pediatric associations all throughout Scandinavia.
The top pediatric medical association in Germany backed them up 100%.
And this is not a fringe group that's out there against circumcision.
It's very real and something we need to look at.
This is, uh...
From a moral standpoint, it's such an easy issue that it takes a massive amount of propaganda to ignore the basic facts.
It's the initiation of the use of force against the helpless and defenseless infant.
You know, my argument is basic.
Is it healthy flesh?
Then leave it alone.
Yes, ma'am.
Hi, Spahn.
My name's Janet Bloomfield.
I have three children.
I have never hit them ever once.
Yay!
I actually don't believe in punishment of any kind.
I believe in letting them learn.
You want to throw rocks in the air?
Well...
Go for it.
Mama's nimble.
Mama's nimble.
Bullet time!
I was raised by an extremely violent mother, so I had to learn how to be a parent.
And I found Dr. Sears and attachment parenting.
What do you think of that philosophy?
I think that whatever contributes to a closer bond, to an empathetic bond between parent and child, is the best shield against aggression.
Aggression results when you dehumanize whoever it is.
If you empathize with that person, you would rather hit yourself than hit them.
And I just want to support you in saying that when there's no violence, creativity emerges.
That's my kids, all three of them.
They're just fantastic.
And I'm constantly getting compliments on how well behaved they are.
And it always, it's sort of, it's weird.
I'm getting congratulated for not beating the fuck out of my kids.
Like, isn't that just a basic...
Shouldn't people just know that?
Anyway, Thank you.
Anyway, my point is for people who are looking for guidance for how to be the kind of parent that doesn't need to resort to screaming and yelling and punishment, Dr. William Sears.
He is an absolutely fantastic resource.
He publishes books.
Anyone who's expecting a baby, look for books by Dr. Sears.
They're a wonderful place to start, I think.
So my, yeah, I'll just finish with one story and then we'll end.
So my daughter is five, I guess two stories.
So I bit my tongue the other day and she looked at me and she's like, oh dad, I felt that in my own tongue, right?
Which is the implantation of mirror neurons, which means that she empathizes with somebody else's experience to the point where she feels, and it's like, great, my job is like mostly done.
Like 90% of parenting is the first couple of years.
And so she has the empathy.
I now no longer have to worry about her ever being cruel.
The other day we went to a play center And, um, I don't know why I don't have a lot of hair, but last time I was at a play center, I was kind of inching my way down the slide, and I hit something metal, and basically it was like an airstrike of lightning going through my body, and it scared the crap out of me.
Almost literally, actually.
So, uh, oh, there's been an accident in the slide, so I'm not kidding.
Um, and anyway, so I didn't want to do it again.
And so the next time we were at that play center, she said, Dad, I know you're scared.
I get it.
I understand.
Like, when I fell off my scooter, I was scared too.
But you remember what I did?
I'm like, oh no.
I know.
You're fine.
Get in line.
But she said, you know, I went back and I did my scooter again and you encouraged me to do that.
Remember?
Hey, I'm an authority.
I wouldn't be an authority if I wanted rules to go two-way, you know?
But yeah, she made the case, and I ended up going down the slide.
We had a great time, and she always coached my five-year-old on how to overcome my fears.
That's... You can't beat that as parenting.
I mean, that's a fantastic experience, so... I think we're done now.
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