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Jan. 5, 2014 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux
47:23
2577 Are Women Held Morally Responsible?

Stefan Molyneux discusses accepting the negative aspects of equality, the choice of single motherhood and the insult of withholding moral responsibility from women for their actions and behavior.

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I guess there's some obvious stuff that troubles me about the degree to which we downgrade or insult women by not giving them moral responsibility.
To me, there's no greater act of bigotry than withholding moral responsibility from someone.
I mean, like, we withhold moral responsibility from children, to some degree, and to the mentally handicapped and to people who've got, I don't know, brain tumors or degenerative brain diseases or something like that.
To people who are, you know, crippled by an excess of youth or a deficiency of brain function, And it's something that I've had difficulty seeing in my life.
I think like all people when I'm younger, you take people at face value.
You hear that women want to be treated as equals, and you say, oh, okay, well, I guess they wanted to be treated as equals.
And then you see, say, Friedrich Schlafly's campaign against the Equal Rights Amendment.
Which would have made it illegal to discriminate on the basis of gender, which would have meant that women would be subject to the draft and all these kinds of things.
There's this sort of mass revolt against that, and she ended up being fairly instrumental in defeating that.
I mean, I'm not saying what is the greatest piece of legislation, but it is interesting where you say, well, women want to be equal, and then...
When there's negative aspects to equality, they don't...
Well, I think you understand.
And I sort of have trouble seeing that because I have faults.
I'm sure I'm not much of a hypocrite.
And when I say something, it's serious, and I try to recognize and accept the negative consequences of that, right?
So, I want to be the philosopher that does the most good in history.
Doing the most good in history instantly means that you are doing the greatest harm to evil, right?
I mean, if you're the greatest cancer research, it's because you've done the most harm to cancer, right?
I mean, and only to cancer, hopefully.
And if you are the greatest...
I think Alexander...
Salk, who invented the polio vaccine, did the greatest harm to the polio virus.
So that which does the greatest harm, those who do the greatest harm to those who harm humans, naturally receive the greatest calumny from those that are doing harm to the evil.
Polio vaccine can't fight back.
So when I aim for being the philosopher who does the most good, I mean, not largely because of me, but largely because of my assiduous use of modern technology to spread the word.
Then naturally, there's going to be people who don't like what I'm doing, blah-de-blah.
I mean, that's how you measure how much virtue you're bringing to the world is how many nasty, ugly, vicious little people dislike you.
That's part of the star that guides me.
Da-da-da!
Until morning.
So I sort of accept the negative consequences of...
What it is that I want to do.
And there's a special kind of hypocrisy, of course, reserved, and perhaps even were there to be a deity, a layer in hell, reserved for people who want all the benefits of equality and none of the drawbacks.
And there are some minorities, there are, I think, women, and again, you know, there's a Not all women are like that.
I know.
I married one.
I get that.
The moment I found one woman who was not like that, I grabbed her and put a sack over her head, and she woke up in Vegas.
And so, in fact, it's such a common response and such a, frankly, brain-dead response, there's actually an acronym for it in the men's rights movement.
It's called NORWALT. Not all women are like that.
It's the NORWALT defense.
Sounds like the Norwalk virus, I suppose.
It is a kind of virus.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.
But, you know, talking in generalities is fine.
If the majority of a particular group are X, then you can talk about that group.
And, of course, there are exceptions.
Anybody who points out exceptions is not fit for philosophy.
I mean, it's not.
Sorry.
I mean, if I say the average height is sort of 5'9", and you say, well, I know a short person, then you're just not fit for philosophy.
You're either too emotionally immature or too intellectually stunted to handle any kind of cognitive thinking.
It's something like I remember reading a book years ago where they put us, I can't remember the statistical average that they put forward, but You know, it was something like, you know, the average income is $25,000 for this group.
And they said, we will lead it to fourth-rate non-thinkers to point out that there are exceptions or that this is only an average and there are some people who are higher and lower.
The average IQ is X. I know some smart X. I know some dumb X. Exactly!
That's why we can say the average height of land is like 40 feet above sea level.
Well, haven't you heard of this?
Of Mount Olympus?
Haven't you heard of Mount Everest and the Mariana?
Anyway, the Grand Canyon?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
Anyway, so I'm not going to even bother with that stuff.
It's anybody who gets fussed about deviations from the norm who think that the bell curve is a single line up and down.
It's just not somebody who's ready for philosophy.
They're just like somebody who's in grade four sucking on a lollipop Wandering into an advanced calculus class and then wondering why people don't give them, why don't they treat them as equals, right?
With the exception that at least someone in grade 4 has the excuse of age.
But anyway, so to move on.
This is going to be generalizations and you can keep your exceptions to yourself unless you want to.
As they say, it's better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
But...
So, for instance, I mean...
Single motherhood for women...
Is almost always talked about...
Instead of just do a Google on single motherhood...
It's always talked about like...
Like it just...
These poor women...
you know?
They've got these men who didn't stick around, who don't have money, who aren't helping them raise them.
You know, the poor single moms...
I mean, it's tragic that this happened to them, you know, like somebody with multiple sclerosis.
It's just terrible, and that is genuinely terrible and awful and horrible.
But the single mom thing is bizarre.
And I always accepted and believed when women said, we don't want to be treated like children.
And so, I mean, I will hold fast to that.
I don't want to treat my wife like a child.
I don't want to treat my female friends like children.
I don't want to treat my daughter.
I don't want to treat her like a child in terms of what's traditionally meant by that.
I mean, she is a child, but I'll treat her appropriately and philosophically as a child, but I don't want her to grow up in a world that treats her as a child, that erodes her sense of maturity and autonomy by constantly pretending that she's retarded.
To be honest, I'm sorry if people don't like the word retarded.
It was like the fifth iteration of being nice to the mentally handicapped that I came across.
Originally, it was mongoloid and then retard and then it became retarded.
And now I think it's mentally handicapped or otherwise cognitively enabled.
I don't know what it is.
So I'm just going to use retarded.
I'm sorry.
I don't mean this in a negative way.
I don't know what the latest iteration is, and given that this was the fifth one that was supposed to be nicer, I'll just stick with it.
But I don't want people to treat my daughter.
Like she's retarded, like she has no control over her reproductive organs or who she has sex with or whether she can have birth control available to her and use it, right?
I mean, if you think of all the steps that are required for women to end up as single mothers, and by that I don't just mean like shared custody, right?
That's sort of co-parenting, I guess, but single moms are like where the dad is not really very involved and maybe not even financially much or at all involved, but basically a woman who's largely or completely raising the child alone.
And by this, I also do include, though, those sort of forced money from the man, which is kind of problematic and challenging and all that.
So, look at all the steps that are necessary to For a woman to become a single mother.
I mean, she has to meet a man.
She has to like a man.
She has to choose to have sex with a man.
She has to choose, and given the prevalence of single motherhood, it ain't because the condoms are breaking, she has to choose to have unprotected sex with a man.
Then she has to do it, I mean, unless it's bad luck, right?
It takes usually a couple of times.
It usually takes like two months to get pregnant.
So, usually, statistically, she's going to have to do it more than once.
It may happen, right?
Obviously, but statistically, she's going to have to do it for a month or two, repetitively, in order to get pregnant.
And then she's going to have to choose to keep the child in terms of not having it aborted.
And then she's going to have to choose to keep the child in terms of not having it put up for adoption.
Right?
I guess my point is this is not something that just happens to you.
This isn't a, you know, slipped on a bad sidewalk and slipped on an icy sidewalk and pulled my leg.
This is not something that happens to you.
But we talk about single motherhood as if it just, oops, you know, slipped on a cock and it popped a rock and we didn't wear a sock.
And out comes a baby.
Oh, shit!
I just blew my entire rap career with a bad rhyme, a non-rhyme.
This is not something that just happens.
Now, the other thing, in order to become a single mom, so let's say she has a little kid, but she also has to have chosen.
She has to have chosen a man who is irresponsible.
She has to have chosen a man who's irresponsible.
And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that the men are not responsible as well.
Of course they are.
But there's two things that are important about that.
First of all, we do beat up on the men all the time.
Deadbeat dads, absent fathers, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
We do beat up on the men all the time, so we hold them responsible.
And second of all, frankly, come on.
Come on.
Everybody who's not completely brain-dead understands that women are the gatekeepers of reproduction.
Men propose, women dispose.
Men say, can I have sex?
And women say, yes or no.
And women are the ones who choose sexuality.
They are the gatekeepers of sexuality.
It's up to women whether sex occurs or not.
Again, take your exceptions and go back to the kiddie pond.
Go back to the kiddie pool.
Go back to the play center.
So, women are the gatekeepers.
And women, of course, can also lie about birth control, whereas men can't, right?
A man can't lie about whether he's got a condom on, but a woman can lie about whether she's On her, like near her period, or whether she's on the pill, or whether she's got an IED, or a sponge, or IED? IUD? Sorry, IED, very bad sex.
Very bad sex implement.
Definitely not what you want to be doing.
IUD, interuterine device.
So, she can lie about birth control, but the man cannot.
And of course, men who Except that women could lie about birth control if you're having sex with a woman that you're not really close to, that you're not really involved with, that you don't want to marry.
Then, of course, you wear three condoms, a latex glove, and a pup tent.
Enjoy yourself that way, I suppose.
So, yeah, women are the gatekeepers.
To become a single mom, the woman also has to choose a man.
Who is a jerk, who is irresponsible, who's underemployed, who's unemployed, who's not going to be there for her, who, whatever, right?
And she also has to have the child probably over his objections.
Well, it was a terrible case.
It was in Norway, where...
A man got his girlfriend pregnant and he said, I'm not ready for and I don't want to be a father.
I'm not ready to be a father.
I don't want to be a father.
And she insisted on keeping the baby.
Now, to me, if the man doesn't want to be involved and you want to keep the baby, then the man's off the hook.
But that's not the way it works.
If the woman wants to have the baby, like if the woman wants to get an abortion, you can't stop her as the man.
But if she wants to keep the baby, Then you're on the hook for child support even though you don't want to be a dad for the next 18 years at least.
So he mixed some RU486 pills into her...
Oh wait, no.
Stephanie told me that wasn't the morning.
The morning after pill.
I'm sorry.
I can't remember.
She mixed a couple of the morning after pills into a yogurt and fed it to her and then she had...
She had bleeding.
She had an abortion because there was...
I think it was an induced abortion.
And...
It's a horrible story.
Don't get me.
It's an absolutely horrible story.
And that's the desperate lengths he felt to go to in order to not be a father because he had no control, right?
Because he couldn't choose to opt out of fatherhood once the woman had gotten pregnant.
She could choose to opt out of motherhood anytime she wanted, but he could not choose to opt out of fatherhood.
And these were the desperate lengths he got.
He got 18 months in prison.
I think it was originally a year.
I got up to 18 months in prison for this.
And wretched.
Absolutely wretched.
So the woman has to choose to have unprotected, usually repetitive sex with a man who is not reliable, who is not a nice guy.
Nah.
Nice guys.
Women generally only get attracted to nice guys in their 30s, like when they're in their 30s or 40s and want to settle down.
Then it's time to switch to the nice guys who are usually by then so bitter at having been passed over for jerks.
The nice guys are the guys that the women in their 20s cry to about the motorcycle, jerk with tattoos, who just isn't there for them, doesn't treat them right.
Oh, if only I could find a man just like you, who's not you.
Oh, yes.
I have had a few non-touchdowns in the friend zone.
Not many, though.
Not many.
Now, if you have to go through...
And the other thing, too, like, what is wrong with non-vaginal sex for these people?
I mean, frankly, non-vaginal sex, it's pretty damn fine.
Anyway, it's just neither here nor there.
So you have to sort of go through this whole series of, you know, steps involving, you know, significant lubrication and, you know, a couple of bricks to pop open the Kama Sutra at the right series of pages.
And then you have to get pregnant to decide to keep the baby, even though the man shows obvious signs of unreliability before the baby comes along.
The man will show obvious signs of unreliability before the baby comes along.
People's personalities don't just change.
People's personalities don't just change.
Well, he was a solid, employed, committed, dedicated lawyer who really wanted to marry me, and then he turned into a Unstable, shaven-headed guy who couldn't hold down a steady job.
And that is, I mean, it's pretty tragic stuff.
And when we talk about single moms, like, you know, they got hit by the fertility lightning out of a clear blue sky.
Well, then, yeah, that's bad luck, you know, but But babies are not a genetic illness.
They are not, you know, getting hit in your living room by a drunk driver coming through your window.
This is entirely chosen behavior.
Now, I understand, I understand, I understand, I understand that Girls who grew up without a close relationship to their father are much more likely to become single moms.
I mean, I get that.
There's some statistical predictors.
And that I understand.
And I'm not saying that there's not an influence or an effect and so on.
But we know that!
That's been talked about on Dr.
Phil for, what, 11 years?
And it's been talked about in popular self-help books.
I mean, I've not seen the film.
I can't remember the name of it, but there was some film...
With Mark Wahlberg and some bear where, you know, these strippers show up and the bear toasts all of the bad fathering that produced these strippers.
Right?
I mean, if it's in a Mark Wahlberg comedy, then you cannot claim to be unaware of it.
I mean, come on.
If it's that...
And if it's such a common piece of knowledge that it's shown in the trailer...
Then nobody can really claim to be ignorant of it.
I mean, the How I Met Your Mother jokes, you know, looking for a big-breasted woman with daddy issues, I mean, it's all known.
And given that it's all known, then the women who grew up without a good relationship with their father know that this is a problem they need to deal with.
And the other reason why I have...
I mean, it's literally like a smoker saying, I can't believe I got sick.
I mean, come on.
The warnings are right on the label.
And for women who have children with ridiculous manboys, I tell you, the warnings are right on the labels.
You know, on the tattoos, on the facial piercings, on the underemployment status, on the I want to be a drummer as soon as I can get my act together, on the sleeping on friends' couches, on the minimum wage jobs, on the no desire for education, on the never read a book but loves video games.
I mean, it's going to be all over.
These guys.
The warning is on the label called The Outside and Habits of the Man.
And I get it.
You know, bad boys who do sit-ups can be sexually exciting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that.
Of course I do, right?
But, you know, men who go for curvy, dumb blondes are kind of ridiculed and kind of embarrassed about it.
At least, I mean, in my circles.
I don't know if I'm in everyone's circles.
And there is some mockery of women's penchant for bad boys, which does actually also appear to be somewhat based upon the cycle and the menstrual cycle.
But the fact is that the men who procreate and leave or aren't involved or give sporadic child support or no child support or whatever, well, I bet you those guys grew up without fathers and They probably grew up in single mom households.
They probably grew up without any significant or decent male role models.
And what excuses do they get?
Well, none.
They're just deadbeat dads.
But the women created them.
Because the women chose to have sex with them.
Trust me, ladies, if I can bend your sparkly ears for a moment, trust me, ladies, let me tell you this.
It's a great secret.
Ready?
Exciting secret.
Leaning closer.
Leaning closer.
It's a closely guarded secret.
You're going to be shocked and surprised.
Let me tell you something very exciting about men.
You know, in fact, in reality, in truth, all around you, All around you are very nice penises attached to very nice men that would be more than happy to squirt some joy juice and stick around.
There's no shortage of penis juice attached to men who will stay with you.
There's no shortage.
of somewhat shy, which means not particularly sociopathic, somewhat shy, maybe a little nerdy, guys who are smart, who are sensitive, who are kind, who are loyal, who are dedicated.
Maybe, you know, they've got slightly sloping shoulders, maybe they can do about as many push-ups as a slab of sidewalk, but they are, in fact, some very nice guys who have Good livings.
They make good money.
They are stable.
They maybe even own their own car.
You know, they don't necessarily go out and jack a car for a date with you.
Very nice guys all around you.
All around you.
They may be in the AV club.
They may be playing Dungeons& Dragons.
They may be mathletes.
Maybe in the chess club.
But they are really very nice guys who Won't bang you, jump out of the bed, wipe off their cock with a towel, and head for the door.
They will stay.
They will, in fact, spoon.
You will get a wonderful breakfast from these guys.
I mean, eggs benny with home fries, little slices of tomato, maybe even something cut up, look like a flower.
Bodomed lovely coffee, a whiff of cream.
Oh, delish.
And they will in fact plan to spend the afternoon with you going down to the Warhammer store to look at figurines.
No, I'm kidding.
They will enjoy.
They will enjoy spending the afternoon with you walking around, maybe down by the waterfront, strolling around.
They may hold your hand, maybe a little shyly reach for your hand and so on, and they'll be Absurdly happy when you take their hand, and it may be a little clammy because they're a little tense, but they're very excited, and their hearts open like joyous exploding flowers when they get into a romantic relationship with a woman.
And yes, it's true, it's true, I will admit that to some degree their loyalty may be associated with a slightly reduced set of options, and it also is true that One of the terrible reasons that some women have sex is because they want a piece of arm candy that will make their girlfriends jealous.
I mean, I would believe the majority of female consumerism is driven by fear of the disapproval of other women.
We certainly know for a fact that women dress for other women, because if they dressed for men, they'd be wearing, I don't know, cobwebs, gossamer, and one band-aid.
If they show up with the maybe slightly slopey, somewhat nerdy guy who's very happy to be with them, their girlfriends may be like, uh, why are you dating that loser?
I mean, come on.
I told you, like, Biff is totally here, and Biff has, like, a total six-pack.
He's completely hot.
I mean, when he's in his undies, it's like he just stepped right out of a Calvin Klein commercial.
I mean, come on.
What are you doing with this guy?
He's got, like, a pimple on his nose, and he's got, like, I mean, what are those?
Are those like moles on his forearms?
Or did he just spatter a whole bunch of paint all over his body?
Has he ever seen the sunlight?
And I saw, I swear to God, I swear to God, I saw in the back of his mouth, I think I saw a tooth.
That was a little crooked and actually looked a little discolored.
So basically, you're dating a mouth leper with spots and, oh my God, I mean, I don't even know.
My 70s show called, they want their haircut back.
I mean, God, what are you doing with this guy?
I mean, what do you see in him?
I mean, okay, maybe he's smart and maybe he's well-read and maybe he's a good conversationist.
Maybe he really cares for you.
Maybe he's got a job.
Maybe he'll stick around.
Maybe he's really excited and happy to be with you.
Maybe you'd be loyal, but...
I mean, ew.
I mean, you can pinch an inch.
I mean, my God.
I mean, does he have a penis the size of a timber dog?
I mean, his belly is like rotund.
And I don't know.
I mean, you could shout into that belly button and probably get an echo.
And I mean, what if you go in there with rubber gloves to dig out the lint?
And I swear, I swear, those socks were polyester.
And I don't even know.
I can't even say.
What that does to me.
I mean, you touch me with polyester, it literally is like being hugged by a leper, and that's super gross.
And so you get all this stuff going on from these women who are basically herding other women towards dating the worst possible specimens of mankind.
And then, when the women have made the stupidest conceivable decisions that affect the greatest number of people, Then what they do is they attempt to influence the narrative in society to portray them as heroic and noble victims of men.
Victims of men.
Victims of men.
They control the dating because they say yes or no.
They control the sex because they say yes or no.
They control the birth control because they say yes or no.
And, of course, men can control the birth control.
Sorry, can control?
Yeah, they can control the birth control.
I'm just talking about from the woman's side of things.
They choose to date, to have sex, to have unprotected sex, usually many times.
And then what happens is they choose to have the baby, keep the baby, even though the man is obviously unreliable.
And then what they do is they portray themselves as a heroic and noble victim.
You know, I mean, this is part of the double standard, right?
Like, I was listening to this TV show, the radio show the other day, and a woman called in to the host, and she was saying, like, yeah, like, my husband, he was one of the women, like, everything was a question.
So my husband, he, you know, like, we've been married for quite a while, and I found out a couple of years after we got married that he was into porn, And this, like, appalled me and shocked me.
And we had to go to counseling, and it was just terrible, and oh my god, I couldn't believe it, and so on.
And then she said, and then, you know, a couple of years ago, I guess this was, we've been married 12 years, so I guess eight or nine years after all of this, I got involved in an affair.
And...
It was a deeply emotional affair.
And, you know, I've been thinking about it, and I think that because my husband was into porn, like, ten years ago, that I probably felt so betrayed by that, that I was, like, that just shocked me so much to the core.
That I think that I probably had that affair out of a sense of pain and shock that my husband had looked at some naked women 10 years ago.
And of course the host was like, well, yes, I mean, I can really see that.
I mean, how that might alienate you and make you feel, you know, troubled about sexuality and blood.
And it's like, oh my God.
Oh my God.
I mean, what a ball-grinder.
I mean, to be just so shocked and appalled that a man looks at some pornography, that you drag him off to counseling and then a decade later blame his looking at naked women for you having an affair?
I mean, dear God in heaven, is there any fucking moral autonomy left between cleavage whatsoever?
At all?
Anywhere?
Anywhere?
Don't blame your affair on your husband!
You made the choice to have the affair.
You made the choice to marry a man who's into porn.
Sorry, to marry a man.
Who has a penis?
Who's into porn, right?
Sorry, porn is sexually exciting.
And a third of porn consumers are women.
I don't know.
I mean, if you show a picture of luscious desserts to somebody on a diet, yes, they're going to start watering.
Sorry, it's a physiological response.
Don't get me wrong.
Porn industry is highly dysfunctional and preys upon people who are victims of abuse, blah-de-blah-de-blah.
I get all of that, and I'm not trying to pretend otherwise.
But, oh my God, if we're going to talk about problems with lust, let's talk about problems with lust.
Fine.
What's worse, looking at some pornography, For a man.
Or having a child with no father for a woman.
Both of these are products of lust.
Which one do you think harms society more?
Which one do you think harms children more?
I'll give you about a tenth of a nanosecond to see if you can puzzle this one out.
Single motherhood is the result of unbridled lust on the part of the mothers.
Unthinking, bestial, retarded lust.
This guy's hot.
I want to have sex.
Damn the consequences.
With the exception of those in the porn industry, porn harms no one.
In fact, there are significant studies that seem to say, and seem quite credible, again, I don't look at the source data, so I'm not going to stake my reputation on that truth or falsehood, but there are significant studies that have been replicated in a wide variety of areas that pornography reduces, prevalence of pornography reduces the prevalence of rape.
Now, some women, of course, have a problem with pornography because Pornography as a whole tends to reduce female power just a little bit, in the same way that why was masturbation banned?
Masturbation was banned to make women more attractive.
Because if the only way that you can have an orgasm is to have sex with a woman, and the only way you can have sex with a woman is to marry her in the eyes of the church, then hey, church and women have a whole lot more power.
To be able to masturbate and achieve orgasm looking at pornography When you're a single man, it reduces your need for sex, obviously, right?
And do women necessarily like that?
I mean, some women, I'm sure, are fine with it.
Some women probably hate it, and some women are probably indifferent, but it certainly does make women a little necessary.
As, of course, as a number of writers from Tom Wolfe to Camille Paglia have pointed out, Women are sort of back in the age-old dilemma when they're young, the hooking-up culture, right?
Do I put out or not?
Well, if I put out, the man won't respect me.
If I don't put out, the man won't date me because there's lots of other women who will, right?
With female sexuality, it tends to be a bit of a race to the bottom.
You know, I mean, if there's lots of women who will have sex...
And I had a friend who was considerably younger who was talking quite a bit about how, you know, if you haven't had sex on the third date...
Then is there something wrong?
And I'm, you know, I just, I find that kind of shocking.
I mean, I find that kind of shocking.
That's pretty fast to have yourself some sex there, buckaroo.
You don't know this woman.
I mean, anyway, that's neither here nor there.
But, uh...
I was shocked that somebody wouldn't say, are you actually blaming your moral decision to have an emotional affair on the fact that your husband looked at some pornography ten years ago for which you punished and browbeat and wailed and sobbed and ground him through the muck and dragged him off to counseling and oh my god, what a witch hunt for some lusty eyeballs.
Oh my god, why don't you just blind the guy with a hot poker so he has to have braille sex or something like that.
But this idea that women are victims no matter what, that women have no moral agency.
My God!
My God!
And, you know, feminists, of course, most feminists tend to be sort of for legalized abortion, which is not really feminism.
You know, of the 1.5 million abortions inflicted, fetus murders inflicted every year in America, you know, About half of those are girls.
So the wholesale slaughter of 750,000 female fetuses hardly seems pro-female to me.
Again, I could be entirely wrong, but it does not seem like they are entirely pro-female in that they really do advocate sort of conditions which Allow for, and through subsidies even encourage, and through the welfare state, make more likely the wholesale slaughter of 750,000 potential women.
That's really quite a lot, and that's just in the United States, which admittedly is one of the highest abortion rates around.
That does not seem very pro-female to me at all, because, you know, They're girls too, right?
They're just girls inside a woman.
But I mean, for feminists to really have credibility as far as wanting to treat women as equal, then they would say to single moms, like, what?
I mean, you are completely and totally responsible.
For your situation.
Fifty years ago, before the correlation between having a bad father and early single motherhood or a teen pregnancy, before that was all understood, yeah, okay, you get some slab, but it's all well known now.
I mean, if you eat cheesecake three times a day and have no idea why you're gaining weight, then you're probably too dumb to live alone and you need to be in some sort of managed care facility.
And if you don't know that If you have a bad relationship with your dad, you have some issues to work out with regards to men and affection and all that, then you're probably too dumb to have kids and take care of them in any reasonable way.
I mean, you have to know that stuff.
I mean, if you don't know that stuff, I mean, good lord.
You can't have a baby and say, well, I didn't know he needed to be fed.
That's just murder, right?
And if you grew up without a dad or with a bad relationship with your dad or an abusive dad, of course, you know!
You know!
You're going to be attracted to bad boys and you're going to want to get pregnant and so on, right?
And you're going to want to get pregnant with the worst kind of man.
I mean, this is just common knowledge for now.
And if you don't know it, then...
I mean, you just can't not know it.
Sorry.
No smoker can not know.
That this is dangerous.
This is bad for him.
It's like hang gliding and saying I had no idea that there was gravity.
I had no idea that I might fall.
Oh, it's tragic.
Tragic.
Unfathomable.
Unimaginable.
Unguessable.
Oh, come on.
Give me a break.
Anyway.
So, for feminists and people who genuinely care about women, I mean, if we excuse people for moral standards, we give them immediate relief.
Of course we do.
Absolutely.
If you give a kid an A who failed a test, you're going to give him immediate relief.
Woohoo!
Man, I thought I'd failed.
I thought I was going to have to take this home from my mom and get all kinds of crap.
Oh, man, or my dad, or both.
Oh, I'm so glad.
What a relief.
I got an A. Oh!
Sure.
I had a lump in my neck.
Doctors had called me up and said, oh, it's completely benign.
It was taken out.
Nothing to worry about.
I had felt immediate relief.
But if it wasn't, in fact, benign, you know, I probably would have died.
Because it turned out it wasn't benign.
It was lymphoma.
So I had to go get my treatments.
So, with single moms, if you say, well, you're a poor noble victim of a guy who should have stuck around, you know, nobly raising a kid, the only one who cares, and the dad, right?
Then you give them immediate relief?
Absolutely.
Of course you do.
And if you're a dentist and you lie to your patient and you say, hey, no cavities, good for you, off you go, right?
But he's got nine cavities.
You give him immediate relief.
But what happens to him in the long run?
I mean, dear God, does this even need to be said?
It's so ridiculous to have to explain things to the world that are so ridiculously obvious and so completely blindingly obvious when viewed in any other context whatsoever.
Go to a salesman desperate for sale.
Hey, you made the sale!
Huge happiness.
If he didn't make the sale, that's not good, right?
Go to someone, hey, you won the lottery!
Let's go buy a car and a house!
And he goes and buys a car and a house, turns out he didn't win the lottery, well, he's kind of screwed, right?
Immediate happiness followed by disaster.
And everybody wants that relief, of course they do.
I mean, the single moms...
They want their relief.
Of course they do.
They made absolutely, ridiculously terrible decisions, and everyone with an IQ over 80 should have known better.
And everyone with an IQ under 80 shouldn't be raising kids.
I don't know what the cutoff is, but it's something like that.
And if you say, well, you know, you're victims of guys who should have stuck around, and you're noble and heroic for...
Sticking it through with your kids and being there for them and blah-de-blah-de-blah.
Of course, of course, there's an immediate relief.
Like if you're saying with a woman who's sleeping with everything that moves, you're exploring your sexuality.
You're empowered, sister.
A quarter of American teenagers have an STD. Ew!
It's like a denim-clad, short-skirted belly-exposing cesspool of toxic medieval waste and sludge.
I'm putting on Kevlar in a hazmat suit and doing it from another room into an electrical socket because that's less dangerous.
I mean, it's mad.
So yeah, you'll give them immediate relief, but there's a huge problem.
It's like passing people who should have failed.
It's like letting those tiny women.
The average man can beat the world's strongest arm wrestling champion.
An average man can beat her.
And, you know, 40% more muscle mass, 40% higher body strength.
Sorry, don't blame me.
Blame Krishna for defining men and women that way.
But it's like lowering the standards to let female firefighters in.
Yay!
Look, we've got our numbers.
They're all equal.
But unfortunately, if you're on the other side of a stuck door in a burning building, you're kind of fucked.
And you will be a perfect little cinder block, crispy, bacon-flavored peon to forced egalitarianism in the face of rampant biological inequality.
Well, I may have died in a fire.
But at least the bar charts of gender participation look equal.
And it is horrible.
And it is infantilizing to pretend to women who become single moms.
And this is one example.
Sorry to bag on single moms.
I'm just sort of pointing it out.
That it is...
ridiculously infantilizing to say to women, you are a victim of very specific choices that you made as an adult.
It's also ridiculous to say to a woman, okay, so it's not your fault that you chose to get sexually involved with a man so it's not your fault that you chose to get sexually involved with a man and not use birth None of that is your fault.
You have no causality in the making of this child with an unstable man.
Right, for cloning a mini asshole from a big asshole.
Sorry, don't mean mini asshole.
It's not the kid's fault.
But, if there are genetic aspects to personality.
Anyway.
Say, it's not your fault.
Which means that you had no way of knowing.
Not your fault is another way of saying you had no way of knowing.
If some driver crashes through your living room window...
Well, you had no way of knowing...
You're not out there driving dangerously.
You're sitting there reading the paper.
Because you're the last guy in the world who's actually reading a paper.
Yay!
Turn it off.
shut him down.
But we're saying to women, you could not have known that having repeated unprotected sex with an unstable man might have negative consequences.
But then we say that you are perfectly competent to raise a child.
You get how ridiculous that is, right?
If you don't know that repeated unprotected sex with an unstable guy who doesn't want children and shows no sign or indication or inclination to wanting to marry you or be a father, if you have repeated unprotected sex with a man who does not want to be a father,
If you don't know that that might have negative consequences, I cannot for the life of me fathom how you'd be even remotely intelligent enough to raise a child.
I mean, do you get this?
I'm not saying, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that single moms are dumb at all.
I don't believe that for a second.
But I do believe that there's...
Because I believe that they're smart enough to know that repeated, unprotected sex with an unstable guy is going to have negative consequences.
It's the only way that you could possibly leave children in their care is if they understand that, right?
If they don't understand that, they can't be having kids.
You can't leave kids with them.
Right?
So, if you want the moral responsibility, autonomy, and independence to raise your kids, to be allowed to raise your kids by yourself, then...
You clearly also have the moral autonomy, responsibility, and independence to have made a terrible choice, a repeated series of terrible choices, to have children with unstable guys.
maybe a series of unstable guys.
So these are certainly some of my thoughts on the issue...
I hope that it's...
I genuinely believe it comes out of a place of respect for women.
And boy, if you really want to help people, don't take away their moral responsibility, their choices.
It may hurt the short run, but man, oh man, it's essential to growth in the long run.
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