My new book LOSERTHINK, available now on Amazon https://tinyurl.com/rqmjc2a Content: The losing way to look at the world versus The winning way to look at the world --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/scott-adams00/support
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| Hey everybody, it's a very special single topic feriscope today. | |
| I'm going to wait for a thousand people to jump in and then we're going to jump right into it. | |
| It's going to be short. There will be no simultaneous sip. | |
| We already did that today. | |
| It's going to be on one topic. | |
| And this topic will change the lives of some of you. | |
| Others of you will say, I kind of knew that, but it will give you a new way to package it so you can convince other people, maybe change somebody else's life by using this communication method. | |
| So, this is about the losing way to look at the world versus the winning way to look at the world. | |
| This is something I've noticed over my lifetime. | |
| That people who are having a tough time making it in this world have very similar thinking patterns. | |
| And the people who are doing great have also very similar but different thinking patterns from the people who are not doing so well. | |
| And I want to show you those so you can choose the one that works for you. | |
| Let's start with the loser frame. | |
| This is an unproductive way of looking at the world. | |
| It doesn't mean that the people who think this way are losers. | |
| It does mean that the technique is not a winning technique. | |
| And it goes like this. | |
| This is one way of looking at the world. | |
| There are people in the world who are continually doing stuff you don't like. | |
| And those people are having a big effect on you. | |
| They're making your brain register all this stress. | |
| And then your brain is sending that stress into your body and it's making you feel bad in a variety of ways. | |
| It's making you sick and unhappy and lose sleep and everything else that stress does. | |
| And then all of that is, of course, going back into your brain figuratively, or at least conceptually. | |
| You could think of it as a loop in which it just makes you sad. | |
| Now, how do you fix this situation if that's how you see the world? | |
| It's tough. The only thing you can do is wait for other people to act different than normal people. | |
| That's it. Your only hope of getting out of this is if other people stop acting like regular human beings all of a sudden. | |
| Because they're acting like normal people. | |
| It's not really reasonable to expect that they'll just stop acting that way. | |
| So here's a permanent losing framework. | |
| If you see the world like this, you see yourself as a victim of these other people who just don't seem to change. | |
| So what's the productive way to look at this? | |
| Well, without changing any facts in the world, Without making anything different about what you perceive, here's the way winners look at the world. | |
| And it's pretty consistent. | |
| I think you'll notice that the winners often think this way. | |
| It goes like this. | |
| The way winners think is that your brain has different parts. | |
| And again, this is conceptual. | |
| I'm not saying everybody who does well in life thinks of it exactly this way. | |
| But once you see it, I think you'll agree. | |
| But we have this little executive decision part of our brain, just a small part that can make rational decisions. | |
| For example, that part of your brain could say, I'd better go to college. | |
| I'd better learn a skill. | |
| Just a rational decision. | |
| This part says, I hear it's good to go to the gym, so I'll build that into my schedule. | |
| Rational decision. We're not rational species. | |
| This big part of your brain is doing a whole bunch of irrational stuff, but still, There is a little part of our brain that can make perfectly rational decisions about the easy stuff. | |
| Do I go to the gym? | |
| What kind of a diet do I have? | |
| You know, the things that take care of yourself. | |
| Now let's say you make good executive decisions. | |
| You do the things that people through the centuries know work. | |
| Increasing your talent stack works every time. | |
| Learning works basically every time. | |
| Being nice to people. Having good manners. | |
| Staying out of jail. They're easy, logical things that you can make your body do. | |
| You can make your body not pick up that piece of cake, and instead you can make your body pick up something that's a little healthier for you. | |
| You can make your body have the right body language so people appreciate you, etc. | |
| Under this model, you make these little executive decisions about what your body will be doing. | |
| Now, that includes your mind. | |
| It includes what you say. | |
| I'm not talking about literally I'm talking about going to school. | |
| I'm talking about driving across town, if it makes sense to do that. | |
| All the things that your body does. | |
| And in this model, everything you do influences other people. | |
| Do you notice how this is the reverse of the loser opinion? | |
| In the loser framework, other people are the cause of all your problems. | |
| In this framework, you're making decisions, your body is going out and doing things, and you are the one influencing other people. | |
| The way they treat you is an outcome of your executive decision and what you did. | |
| Let's say your executive decision was to go to school and get a degree. | |
| Does that affect other people? | |
| Absolutely. Those other people now feel differently about you, they act differently, they offer you jobs. | |
| If you tell your body to act polite even when you're not feeling polite, does that affect other people? | |
| Absolutely. Other people will respond to your politeness, usually with politeness. | |
| They will like you better, etc. | |
| If you tell your body to show interest in people even if you don't really feel it, so you ask them about themselves, you listen, you're a good listener, does that affect other people? | |
| Absolutely. If you act like a good listener even if you're not feeling it, But if you act like it, if you get your arms and legs and mouth to be a good listener, these people will be influenced. | |
| They'll say, I like that person, good listener, cares about people, empathy. | |
| I think that would be a good manager, somebody I want to mate with, etc. | |
| Now in this model, if your executive decision moves your body, your body influences other people, both the things that your body is doing and the things that other people are responding with are making you happy. | |
| In this model, You are controlling the entire flow. | |
| Now, does that mean that the loser frame is 100% debunked? | |
| No. They both run at the same time. | |
| It is true that other people are just doing stuff that's making you unhappy. | |
| You can't change that. | |
| But you can understand your world differently and take control. | |
| If you understand that your executive decisions that move your body are what is programming other people, at least the other people that are affected by you directly, You're programming those people, and that programming is the thing that makes you happy, because they are loving you, they are hiring you, they're giving you raises, they're saying good things about you, they're becoming your friends, they're doing you favors, and it's all because they're getting something out of it. | |
| They're not doing it because they're good people, although some might be. | |
| They're doing it because you program them. | |
| You program them by the way you act. | |
| That is the winning frame. | |
| You're probably thinking to yourself, who do you know who has the winning frame versus the losing frame? | |
| And this is the sort of lesson that is going to become more profound as you think about it. | |
| The more you think about it, you're going to start noticing people, the people who just can't figure out how to make it in life, are all the people who think they're victims of what other people are doing. | |
| The moment you can reframe that, As you are programming other people, which, by the way, is a different way of explaining the Dale Carnegie method. | |
| There's a reason that Dale Carnegie has been a best-selling book for how many decades? | |
| Decades after decades? | |
| It's because it works. | |
| And the Dale Carnegie method, among other things, It teaches a wide variety of things. | |
| But one of the things that I find most important is that you learn that you are the agent of reprogramming your environment. | |
| People will respond to you based on what you do. | |
| So you are programming them all the time. | |
| If you allow them to program you, they will. | |
| They will. They'll fill in the blank. | |
| If you're not programming the people around you, they will program you. | |
| Guaranteed. So you only have those two choices. | |
| Get programmed and have no control over your life, or become the programmer. | |
| Somebody in the comments is saying, hello, Jordan Peterson. | |
| I would contend, I haven't heard Jordan Peterson say this exactly, but I'm pretty sure it's compatible with the things he says. | |
| You will notice that all the people that you recognize are good at this stuff, Meaning good understanding strategies for being successful. | |
| I would be willing to bet that 100% are compatible with what I just said. | |
| Probably every person who really gets it, probably every person who's ever made a billion dollars, understands that they are the agents programming other people. | |
| As soon as you think it's the other way around, that's what's going to happen. | |
| It's self-fulfilling. Yes, I think you'll see this quite a bit. | |
| I thought I would put this in one crisp little video, and I'm going to end it right here. |