Feb. 25, 2019 - Rubin Report - Dave Rubin
58:25
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| Speaker | Time | Text |
|---|---|---|
| Joining me today is a comedian, actor, and podcaster, Nick DiPaolo. | ||
| Welcome to The Rubin Report. | ||
| Thanks, Dave. | ||
| How are you? | ||
| I like that the first thing you said to me was, do I have to worry about any language here? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You want to drop it right now? | ||
| You want to drop all your big words? | ||
| Well, this place is fucking beautiful! | ||
| Like you said, I've seen you on YouTube and it looks like a TV set. | ||
| I felt like I was walking in to meet the press. | ||
| Yeah, this is very professional. | ||
| I wore a jacket for you the whole time. | ||
| I was going to put a tie on for you. | ||
| That would have been a bit much. | ||
| Yeah, that's what I thought. | ||
| He would have seen right through that. | ||
| Does anyone want to see a comedian in a tie? | ||
| Yeah, only if they're hanging themselves after they say something wrong, you know? | ||
| Yeah, well, I think that's gonna be the theme of everything we're doing here. | ||
| So for the people that don't know you, give me a little background on Nick DiPaolo. | ||
| Pre-stand-up. | ||
| Pre-stand-up? | ||
| Did you have a life before stand-up? | ||
| I don't know if you'd call it a life. | ||
| I had a heartbeat and I was breathing. | ||
| I grew up about 22 miles north of Boston in a very middle-class white suburb, pretty much, and went to college at University of Maine. | ||
| And I came out of college, took a job selling frozen steak and seafood door-to-door out of the back of an Isuzu pickup truck. | ||
| That actually seems like a good prelude to stand-up. | ||
| It was a great prelude. | ||
| I'd walk into places, I'd lay out all my stuff. | ||
| I'd go into any residence, small businesses, I'd go into a real estate, I'd lay out all my stuff if they let me in. | ||
| There'll be 20 people firing questions. | ||
| How much is that per pound? | ||
| Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it was great. | ||
| I'd make them laugh. | ||
| And, you know, this stuff was really overpriced, but it was a boiler room operation, and I'm sure there's people who haven't seen me on TV since. | ||
| They're saying, I'm gonna find that. | ||
| I bought Haddock for 85 bucks a pound from that jerk. | ||
| So, yeah, I did that for a few years and then took a job. | ||
| You ever see those companies late at night that market inventions, if you have an idea for an invention? | ||
| Oh, yeah, yeah. | ||
| I did that and started... Wait, wait, meaning you did one of those infomercials? | ||
| No, I was... I actually was a... | ||
| A salesman, like I have my own corner office. | ||
| Another boiler room operation. | ||
| Wow, geez. | ||
| Which I didn't know. | ||
| When you come out of college, it looks like a legitimate. | ||
| They're in a nice building. | ||
| I got a suit on and stuff. | ||
| Then you find out. | ||
| But the biggest one, I took a job with New England Rare Coin Galleries in Boston. | ||
| It was like working at Merrill Lynch. | ||
| It was on the 31st floor of a skyscraper. | ||
| I had to wear a suit. | ||
| It looked just like, you know, Charles Sheen of Wall Street when I went to work. | ||
| So I did that. | ||
| That was brutal. | ||
| I'm trying to sell $50,000 coins. | ||
| over the phone to somebody I've never met before. | ||
| This is after selling steak at Seafood on a toilet. | ||
| Yeah, there's some training ground. | ||
| That didn't last long, right? | ||
| So I quit that. | ||
| I quit that, and about a month later I'm watching TV. | ||
| I see my boss being let out by the FBI. | ||
| No shit. | ||
|
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It was like another boiler room operation. | |
| Some of the coins were fake. | ||
| But I started doing stand-up right after that, probably a couple of years out of college. | ||
| And this is in Boston? | ||
| Yeah, in Boston, at a place called Stitches. | ||
|
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There's a documentary, you've probably seen it, when stand-up stood out. | |
| And that little club where they're interviewing people, Stitches, that's the first place I did my first joke, open mic. | ||
| I was drunk at a cookout. | ||
| Parents house and like good parents. | ||
| They gave me the keys said I Want to try so yeah, I put my name in sure enough. | ||
| I get called. | ||
| It was a Sunday night I pull up to stitches in Boston and on the marquee. | ||
| I never forget. | ||
| It says it said comedy hell. | ||
| Yeah, that's what So I that was my first George McDonnell was the hostess guy in Boston my first line on stage was an ad-lib That's when he said to me. | ||
| I knew you're gonna be funny. | ||
| I followed some guy in a tuxedo and And I had like a sweatshirt on and I said, I'm like, I didn't know what to, how to dress. | ||
| And I said, I didn't know I'd be following fucking Mr. Saunders, which is a local tuxedo place. | ||
| And that got like a nice laugh and then I bombed the next four minutes. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And I was stupid enough to go back. | ||
| Yeah, so that's pretty much the beginning of everybody, right? | ||
| Yes. | ||
| You don't even know how to screw up at the beginning. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| So you're kind of good by accident or something like that. | ||
| That's right. | ||
| That must have been a magical time in Boston. | ||
| I mean, that's what the documentary is about, but there were major, major comics there all doing it seemingly for the right reason. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Before they even knew what stand-up could become or what it would be. | ||
| Yeah, and it's still to this day. | ||
| You think about the people that have come out of Boston. | ||
| I mean, you know, Jay Leno, Conan, Joe Rogan, Louie, Billy Burr, myself, even Kevin Meaney and Jenny Grafla moved to Boston at the time. | ||
| And yeah, it was crazy. | ||
| Stephen Wright. | ||
|
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Yeah, he's a legend. | |
| He's a legend, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, I mean, so it's a crazy... but that was... reminds me of Goodfellas at the beginning. | ||
| It was a glorious time. | ||
| I had a pot of coke next to my bed at the Comedy Condo. | ||
| It was, it was unbelievable. | ||
| How thin did you cut the garlic? | ||
| What's that? | ||
| How thin did you cut the garlic? | ||
| Very thin, with the... | ||
| There's a metaphor there. | ||
| You could do that at Nick's. | ||
| You know, exactly. | ||
| At Nick's, that's how they get paid. | ||
|
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At Nick's Comedy Club, you could get paid in coke or money. | |
| So there were a lot of drugs going on. | ||
| Yeah, I wasn't a drug guy. | ||
| I was a jock. | ||
| I played football in college. | ||
| But they would kick me out of the green room. | ||
| Like Steve Sweeney and Gavin and all the veterans. | ||
| Like, hey rookie, you gonna do this shit or get out? | ||
| I'm standing outside. | ||
| One time I tried it. | ||
| John Panett talked me into it. | ||
| After about a year and a half. | ||
| He talked me into doing a line. | ||
| I go up on stage at Knicks, I'll never forget it. | ||
| And I'm talking, I have cotton mouth from the cup, my lip keeps getting stuck like this. | ||
| I have my hand in my pocket. | ||
| And at one point, it was quiet during this, so the guy yells out, hey relax up there! | ||
|
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I was jig-jiggling my car keys. | |
| I don't mean any disrespect to him, but if he was doing a lot of coke, somehow the weight thing didn't... Makes no sense. | ||
| over my punchlines because my mouth was, my lips kept getting stuck in my teeth. | ||
| And that was how he didn't die earlier. | ||
| I mean, he's the only, I love him so much, so I actually said, "I'll do it to check you | ||
| out." | ||
| I don't mean any disrespect to him, but if he was doing a lot of coke, somehow the weight | ||
| thing didn't-- | ||
| Makes no sense. | ||
| He was putting it on cheeseburgers and, you know. | ||
| I don't know. | ||
| So that was the beginning, man. | ||
| Following guys like Lenny Clark and Steve--these guys are legends. | ||
| The fans probably don't know who they are, but to this day, Kenny Rogerson, these guys | ||
| were as good. | ||
| Now I've been doing it 30 years later and I still haven't seen anybody rock or roam | ||
| like that with a material. | ||
| What do you think happens to that type of guy? | ||
| Because I don't even know those guys, really. | ||
| Like, the guys that don't make it. | ||
| Because I know, I mean, this is the same old story that we all have, but like, some of the worst comics that I started with have become successful, and some of the best ones, and most actually of the guys that I thought were really great... | ||
| Well, the guys in Boston, there was a couple reasons. | ||
| It was so big, comedy stand-up was booming in the mid-80s, late 80s, and that was the mecca, like you said. | ||
| But these guys, like Nick's Comedy Club, held like 350 people. | ||
| And it was just a money-making machine. | ||
| And it was run by the boys. | ||
| And they had, like, some of the guys sign agreements saying they couldn't perform anywhere else. | ||
|
unidentified
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But they were making... This is back in the 80s. | |
| I remember one of the guys telling me they were making three grand thirty-five hundred a weekend. | ||
|
unidentified
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Jeez. | |
| So why would you leave? | ||
| Right, in the cities. | ||
| It's not like you even had to go... In their homes! | ||
| Yeah, you didn't have to go on the road. | ||
| They were in their homes, and they, you know, and like I said, they partied their ass off, and they signed, some of them signed agreements saying that they couldn't perform elsewhere. | ||
| So that's what, but I mean, they were making killer money, didn't have to get on a plane, and, but in the long run, We're saying, you know, who are they? | ||
| But Steve Sweeney's been in a few Fairly Brother movies, and Lonnie Clark was brilliant. | ||
| I saw these guys at their, Kevin Meaney? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I always loved Kevin Meaney. | ||
| Unbelievably fun. | ||
| Sweeney Meaney Night, they call it. | ||
| I was a barback at Stitch's Comedy Club before I, that was the other job, for about six months. | ||
| I just wanted to be near it, you know? | ||
| And it was Sweeney Meaney Night. | ||
| It was Kevin Meaney and Steve Sweeney, who was the godfather of comedy. | ||
| And they had a show on Wednesday nights. | ||
| Kevin Meaney would go out on the street with a camera, live, and a screen would come down in the club so the audience could watch. | ||
| And he would pull over buses, get on buses and start making fun of people. | ||
| Him and Sweeney went into a Chinese restaurant next door. | ||
| Sweeney's got like a cutout of a cop with his face through it. | ||
| He's pretending he's like a food... | ||
| Yelling at the Chinese people to clean up the kitchen. | ||
| Then they go into a ladies room and there's a woman in the stall. | ||
|
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They kick open the door with a camera. | |
| Picture a crowd in a club. | ||
| This would not fly these days. | ||
| No, it wouldn't. | ||
| Of course not. | ||
| That would be too much fun. | ||
| But picture that. | ||
| People inside. | ||
| I've never heard laughter like that in my life. | ||
| Kevin, he waved down a cop and started giving the cop shit and the cop got mad. | ||
| You're watching this on a screen inside. | ||
| Yeah, I mean brilliant and you know, it was it was it was a Unbelievable time there was more stage more stages available than comedians in there I've worked 300 nights my first year and so this is what you're around 88 So this is like sort of sort of at the end of like the boom. | ||
| Yeah, boom, right? | ||
| Yeah, what do they say that wouldn't I sold out? | ||
| Madison Square Garden like three nights in a row. | ||
| That was when the whole thing shattered. | ||
| Yeah, basically Yeah, that sounds about right. | ||
| Which I think was around 90 or 91, something like that. | ||
| Yeah, that sounds about right, yeah. | ||
| But every, I worked, it's tough for these guys, the game has changed so much. | ||
| But me and Louis C.K. | ||
| came up together, he was already doing it a year or two before me. | ||
| I met him, he was 18, I was like 25. | ||
| But every restaurant and pub in New England, not just Boston, I could show you my book from my first year. | ||
| Monday night, I'd be at a Chinese restaurant in Rhode Island. | ||
| Tuesday night, I'd be at some Mexican restaurant in Franklin, Mass. | ||
| Wednesday night, I might do a college. | ||
| Thursday night, I'd be in Nashville, New Hampshire at a Holiday Inn. | ||
| And on, seven nights a week, there was so much stage time. | ||
| As you know, as a stand-up, there's nothing more important. | ||
| And we thought that's how it was. | ||
| We didn't realize there was a boom going on. | ||
| We thought, this is how it is. | ||
| So, I quit my day job. | ||
| I was making more money. | ||
| After about 10 months, I could handle a rough room. | ||
| I mean, that's pretty crazy after 10 months. | ||
| Well, I could handle a rough room. | ||
| And some of the rooms are rough, the one-nighters. | ||
| And I got the reputation that I could close these. | ||
| There was one Kingston and Kingston Mass down in the Cape. | ||
| And it was a pool hall. | ||
| And it was kind of a bucket of blood room. | ||
| I went down, and there's people literally playing pool in the back while I'm doing my... But by the end of it, they had put their pool sticks down. | ||
| And the guy that ran the place said he's the first guy that ever had those guys come in. | ||
| And I got... So I started to close rooms after. | ||
| Barry Katz was my manager at the time. | ||
| He booked every room in New England. | ||
| So I had work every night, and you could make... You know, I was making, on the weekends, I'd make $600, $700, $800 in cash. | ||
| And I was, you know, making about as much as I was during the day, so I quit my day job. | ||
| That's crazy. | ||
| It's a different time. | ||
| Right, no 10-month comedian in New York City. | ||
| If you make $600 in a year, even now, I think you're pretty thrilled. | ||
| Right, I feel bad for these young guys. | ||
| It's a whole different game. | ||
| What do you make of just sort of, you know, when people say, well, comics are all just messed up and the whole thing. | ||
| What do you make about the pain related to comedy that drags all of us in there? | ||
| I think some of it's overblown. | ||
| We all have a screw loose somewhere, but this whole stuff that it has to be the kids who were bullied, I don't buy that shit. | ||
| Even Bill Hicks had a bit about that. | ||
| That he didn't buy into that either. | ||
| His parents supported him, whatever he did, blah blah blah. | ||
| Which is sort of the way I was. | ||
| I was very quiet and serious as a kid. | ||
| Yeah, me too. | ||
| And I bullied as much as I was bullied. | ||
| Nobody likes to say that, but it's the truth. | ||
| That's the point. | ||
| I've been bullied and I bullied people. | ||
| Nick, we're losing a lot of social justice warrior cred right now. | ||
| We're supposed to be victims. | ||
| Thank Christ. | ||
| That's not what I'm here for. | ||
| Man, Bill Hicks, I miss Bill Hicks. | ||
| I mean, he was a little before my time, but like that, that relentless pursuit of truth in standup. | ||
| Yeah, and he was politically to the left, but he was really funny and hateful about it. | ||
| I mean, his conviction, that's what I learned from watching him. | ||
| Even to this day, when I have a joke in my head and I'm like, I don't know if I should say this or not. | ||
| I use sort of him as a barometer. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But, you know, he was on the left. | ||
| He wasn't getting too much trouble. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Showbiz-wise. | ||
| But he said some, you know, stuff. | ||
| The way he used to talk about Rush Limbaugh and stuff. | ||
| I do the same thing to Nancy Pelosi. | ||
| Yeah, well, his bit about Leno. | ||
| Regardless of what you think about Leno. | ||
| I mean, it's one of the, it's one of the, it's so absolutely, it's just perfection. | ||
| His head blows over the NBC peacock. | ||
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I mean, come on. | |
| Hey, Doc, is that a red jacket or is that his brains on your coat? | ||
| Yeah, it's pretty perfect. | ||
| The angst and the... I have a lot of that in me. | ||
| I have that chip that he had for, I don't know, whatever reason. | ||
| I was born like that, you know? | ||
| And that's what I love about him. | ||
| Politically, you know, he used to always say, there's nobody out there that can hurt us when, you know, talking about Iraq or whatever. | ||
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unidentified
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Right. | |
| You know, how we have the biggest military, they have the third biggest, whatever. | ||
| Right. | ||
| He says, there's nobody out there that's a fucking threat to us. | ||
| I'd like to bring them back to life and go, you know. | ||
| Tell him about 9/11, you know. | ||
| So, but he was so, he was, what a writer. | ||
| And you know, I don't have to be on the same side of you politically to find you funny. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I find that you find the left doesn't do that. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| All right, so let's shift there a little bit. | ||
| So what do you think has happened to stand up in the last, say, well now it seems like 20 years, | ||
| but in the last couple years especially, it's gone from where it was seriously edgy, | ||
| where every morning I wake up now and I'm like, like, man, I wish George Carlin was still alive. | ||
| Not only because I think he was the greatest stand-up ever, but we need still some of that, although he'd be getting booed off college campuses because he's an old white guy. | ||
| Yeah, but he was, you know, I love Carl, he's one of my idols too, but he was a lefty and he sort of created this environment, but he was more, I mean, he was more, I guess... He was a lefty, but he was relentlessly against political correctness, so that shows you how some of this stuff has changed. | ||
| But what do you make of sort of what's happened? | ||
| I was telling you right before we started, the only reason I'm doing stand-up now, again, is because so many of these comics now Uh, have become the politically correct children that they're supposed to be making fun of. | ||
| And I was like, I guess I gotta go do it again. | ||
| And now I'm doing it again. | ||
|
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It's bizarre. | |
| You know who I blame? | ||
| And I'm not kidding you. | ||
| The feminist movement. | ||
| They're at the core. | ||
| They're at the core of all this politically correct horse shit that drives us nuts. | ||
| They're at the core of it. | ||
| The whole, I think society's been feminized. | ||
| We, you know, guys, and again, I'm generalizing here, but for the most part. | ||
| Even the loosest generalization will just cause. | ||
| Yeah, I know. | ||
| That's what they want, though. | ||
| They want us to be walking around qualifying every statement. | ||
| I don't mean everybody. | ||
| No, exactly, which I usually don't. | ||
| That's one thing I do in my act. | ||
| I don't try to balance it out. | ||
| I'll pile on. | ||
| But sensitivity. | ||
| PC is based on sensitivity. | ||
| And that's not in our DNA, at least in most guys. | ||
| And they have a never-ending list of grievances. | ||
| They can't leave it alone. | ||
| I don't watch movies anymore. | ||
| I stopped about 20 years ago. | ||
| Because I was aware of it. | ||
| Something made me aware of it. | ||
| I can't suspend my disbelief and watch Angelina Jolie beat up 10 Marines. | ||
| I just can't fucking do it. | ||
| You know? | ||
| I really can't. | ||
| And I just... | ||
| It's been feminized and this business draws a lot of people who were bullied and shit. | ||
| Even back in the in the 80s when I would watch films, I go, why is, and I would say this, this is way before I was in comedy, I go, why is the bad kid at the high school always the white kid with a leather jacket, the jock? | ||
| And every, and it's still to this day, this is 30 years later. | ||
| Teen Wolf, Back to the Future, everything. | ||
| Yeah, this, I mean, I know this, it's just, You know, there's a lot more women comics and whatever, but that's where the PC comes from. | ||
| It comes from the left. | ||
| Nobody ever says that. | ||
| The censorship, I know people have bought into it now. | ||
| Politicians on both sides and guys of equity. | ||
| I guess it's this guy's fault that we let it get this far. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Is it weird how it flipped, though? | ||
| Because you could look at, say, the 90s, when the right was screaming about video game violence and all this stuff, and it's like, no, it doesn't cause real violence. | ||
| If anything, it actually confuses. | ||
| So this is where it's like, to me, the right doesn't get a pass. | ||
| The right is way better now in terms of political correctness and free speech and all that. | ||
| But yeah, the left has become Well, yeah, it's one thing to yell about video game violence, which may or may not be true, whatever. | ||
| I never bought into that. | ||
| I watched Three Stooges from age six to forty. | ||
| I never fucking, I never put my brother in front of the crowbar, poke my mother in the eyes. | ||
| But, yeah, they were wrong in some stuff, but not to the degree that the left's gone. | ||
| We're changing the left. | ||
| Political correctness, you know, the definition is, you know, changing people's behavior through language. | ||
| And, you know, with the Today it's going the he and the she. | ||
| You want to be called they. | ||
| I'm sorry that I didn't ask about your pronouns before we started. | ||
| Yes, I'd like to be. | ||
| I don't even know what they are. | ||
| Call me them. | ||
| It. | ||
| It. | ||
| So most people call me that. | ||
| So it was kind of funny. | ||
| Do you remember when it started seeping into the clubs? | ||
| Um...not really. I don't think I remember. | ||
|
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There's no one specific moment, you know? | |
| I've been doing this 31 years or whatever, so I finally, after all this time, people come out to see me. | ||
| They know what's coming, you know? | ||
| But I do remember early in my career, I was at a Clark University. | ||
| I was doing a college in Clark University. | ||
| I think it's Clark in Massachusetts. | ||
| It's even liberal for a Massachusetts school. | ||
| That's liberal. | ||
| Yeah, and I did some joke about a Middle Eastern guy at a gas station. | ||
| He couldn't find my oil. | ||
| He was trying to chant. | ||
| I said I had the one Middle Eastern guy that couldn't find oil. | ||
| And some kid in the front row at college got shot. | ||
| He goes, Jesus! | ||
| What are you going to do, abortion jokes next? | ||
| So I just rattled off like eight abortion jokes off the top of my head, and the whole place was booing me. | ||
| And it's the only time I got off stage a couple minutes early. | ||
| Really? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| So that was a long time ago. | ||
| But I don't know. | ||
| If you say it with enough conviction, I don't know. | ||
| I get a thrill out of it. | ||
| These are good and bad times, but I've always, even after my first open mic, about six months into my open mic experience, a comic said to me, you're politically incorrect. | ||
| That's where it's headed. | ||
| And even I said to him, I go, it's going to get a lot worse. | ||
| That was, this was like an 88 or 89. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And it did get a lot worse. | ||
| Do you think it can get much worse than it's gotten? | ||
|
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No! | |
| I mean, now you see articles in BuzzFeed every day about stand-up either needs to be not funny now. | ||
| We should enter, you know, did you see that article? | ||
| I did see. | ||
| We should enter a phase where stand-up shouldn't be funny so that we can address the problem. | ||
| Imagine we're having that conversation. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| We're even having that conversation. | ||
| Stand-up, that's the antithesis of what stand-up's supposed to be. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| You're supposed to say what people won't say, and that's in the DNA of a comic. | ||
| I mean, in high school, if I saw an opening in class for a joke, I would, you know, let it fly. | ||
| And I can't believe it's to this point, but I don't know where else it can go. | ||
| Well, it can go in the direction that, you know, they'll force clubs to stop booking people and they'll kick the rest of us off platforms. | ||
| Well, then a black market will pop up like anything else when you prohibit something, right? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And then it can really get fun. | ||
| Then we have a civil war. | ||
| Can we do it all over again? | ||
| Can we have the goddamn war? | ||
| I'm on the side with all the guns. | ||
| You can go right there. | ||
| I'm on the side with all the guns, okay? | ||
| Let's get it on. | ||
| I am tired of it, man. | ||
| But at least, like I said, by now at least I mark up myself and people know, thanks to my podcast and after 30 years of stand-up, I was never, I always, I said stuff on Tough Crowd. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I called, we showed a commercial, and I said, that's cultural Marxists, the people that write this shit. | ||
| And everyone's like, what's he talking about? | ||
| And I got, like, pigeon-holed that day. | ||
|
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Right. | |
| You know? | ||
| That's gotta be at least ten years ago, so that's before... At least ten years ago. | ||
| I was reading a lot of Pat Buchanan, who I still love. | ||
| Okay. | ||
| So you were in the Tough Crowd crew. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| Colin Quinn, obviously, and that whole crew. | ||
| That show, it was only on for a couple years, actually, but it probably would never, well, not probably, it would never make it on Comedy Central now. | ||
| Oh, God, no. | ||
| They actually said to Colin, who's a genius, Colin grew up in, do you know Colin? | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| He's the sweetest guy, as bright a guy as you'll ever meet. | ||
| He grew up in Brooklyn. | ||
| Went to high school, black kids, Puerto Ricans, Dominican, he knows that world. | ||
| And they actually said to him after a few episodes of Tough Crowd, after a couple seasons, they said, why don't you leave the race stuff to Chappelle? | ||
| Can you imagine saying that to Colin? | ||
| That's actually racist. | ||
| Of course it is. | ||
| Of course it is. | ||
| People love that show because me and Patrice, me and Patrice would unload on each other and people love me for it. | ||
| I was on a plane in Atlanta right after me and Patrice had a good toe-to-toe on the show and I was on a plane in Atlanta and I see this black guy looking at me with his son. | ||
| I'm getting a little nervous and they come up to me and they go we love you man on tough crowd. | ||
| Yeah, and and just like you know people Once you meet people face to face That's what sort of, because you clearly have a good disposition, especially for a comic. | ||
| Is that partly what it is? | ||
| Like I see this now after being on tour for the last year. | ||
| If I go online, it's just like an endless hate fest of lunacy. | ||
| Everyone's trying to destroy each other. | ||
| And then every night when I'm touring and I do meet and greets after the show and I meet all of these people and nobody cares what sex they are or sexuality or color and everyone's great. | ||
| So I feel like I live in these alternate worlds where the real world happens to be pretty damn good. | ||
| It is! | ||
|
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And it's not just social media, just the mainstream media. | |
| I'll be laying there watching TV and all of a sudden a PSA will come on for bullying. | ||
| Jesus Christ, leave it alone for five minutes. | ||
| I can't watch a Red Sox game. | ||
| I'm from Boston. | ||
| New England Sports Network is the most PC... I love my Red Sox. | ||
| I have trouble... There's always a... Oh, we've got 12 women from the Maine Women's Shelter here. | ||
| There's kids with cancer. | ||
| It's like, Jesus, I'm watching this to get away from that. | ||
| Look what happened to ESPN. | ||
| I mean, they've destroyed themselves in the name of being woke. | ||
| And they didn't give a shit, did they? | ||
| Do they have that much money? | ||
| That's Disney. | ||
| Nothing is more PC than Disney. | ||
| They're at the core of it, too. | ||
| So wait, you mentioned, we'll get there, but I don't want to jump over Patrice, because you've watched a couple of your core guys die in the midst of this. | ||
| So Greg Giraldo, who was like on his way to becoming star of stars, I used to live like two or three blocks away from him on the Upper West, and I remember Seeing him. | ||
| I would see him all the time. | ||
| He'd have his two kids and he'd be walking them to school or whatever and I used to see him at Equinox at the gym and he was fit and he seemed like he was like, I used to look at him and be like, we didn't really, you know, he kind of knew I was a comic but we didn't know each other. | ||
| But I would look at him and I'd be like, oh you're a comic who like became a human. | ||
| You actually became like a real person too. | ||
| And I sort of wanted to emulate that in a way, and I remember I saw him at the gym one day, and he's pumping blah blah blah, he was dead two days later. | ||
| And it really threw me for a loop, even though I didn't know the guy that well. | ||
| And you've had a couple guys in your crew that just... Yeah, Patrice and Greg, even now when I hear them on the radio. | ||
| You know, I'll be listening to Satellite, and I'm like, ah, I've got a good line for Petrie, great. | ||
| And it just, I never really get over that. | ||
| Giroval just shocked me when that happened. | ||
| He seemed too smart. | ||
| I mean, he's a Harvard guy, law guy, but that's what I loved about him. | ||
| He lent some credibility to stand up, you know what I mean? | ||
| A very bright kid, and always Yeah, he was always jovial and, you know, he would pick my brain. | ||
| He would watch me, I was a little ahead of him, and he would be asking all the right questions, you know, about stand-up, and he was on his way, you know, like you said. | ||
| And Patrice, I just love Patrice because he's a Boston guy. | ||
| He's a curmudgeon and didn't hide his dislike for Whitey. | ||
|
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And I didn't hide my dislike for him or his friends. | |
| Which, that's why we liked each other. | ||
| You know what I mean? | ||
| And what a blow to lose those. | ||
| It's always the good ones, isn't it? | ||
| Yeah, well, only the good die young. | ||
| You know? | ||
| Sarah Silverman will live until she's 112. | ||
| Patton Oswalt and Kathy Griffin. Oh, well now you're talking about the people that dragged me back in I mean | ||
| those three particularly actually But there's a couple others that these are the ones that | ||
| are talking about we can't let Milo's book be published doesn't matter what you | ||
| Think about Milo comedians talking about banning books. I mean, can you imagine you said that about whoever? | ||
| You know Bill Maher should not be able to write a book. | ||
| Yeah, I mean Yeah, I mean they are artists and they are for groupthink | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Which is the quickest way to stifle any creative. | ||
| They're little fascist fucks. | ||
|
unidentified
|
I hate them. | |
| I try to be nice. | ||
| I actually texted Pat Noswell. | ||
| I don't know him that well. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| When his wife died. | ||
| I felt so horrible. | ||
| I texted him a couple times and then I read this stuff. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That he says and I was like, I don't like this guy. | ||
| Wish it was him. | ||
| There's the line. | ||
| I'm just busting balls, really. | ||
| But, you know what I mean? | ||
| And Sarah Silverman, who is she? | ||
| Yeah, well... Couldn't follow me on my worst night. | ||
| There it is. | ||
| So what do we do to break that thing? | ||
| Because it does still seem to be spreading. | ||
| I get that there's some pushback now. | ||
| Well, first off, you're a conservative. | ||
| I'm not! | ||
| I know it doesn't really matter. | ||
| No, I know, but I'm like, and Colin Quinn's others too, I got labeled that after Tough Crowd. | ||
| But we're in show business, right? | ||
| I guess. | ||
| This is show business. | ||
| In Hollywood or wherever, in show business, if you're out of 20 issues, if you lean right on two of them, you're a nut. | ||
| You're a nut, yeah. | ||
| So I kept getting pegged with that conservative conservative. | ||
| But I'm really not. | ||
| I'm for the truth. | ||
| I call them as I see them. | ||
| And I'm sure, you know, conservatives back in the Civil Rights were on the wrong side of that. | ||
| Now these guys are them. | ||
| They're on the wrong side to me. | ||
| Anytime you want to censor, but yeah, I mean, I'm pro-gay marriage. | ||
| I don't really care about guns. | ||
| I can't say I'm pro-life. | ||
| Only because, like, I have a dad dying of Alzheimer's right now, and if I could put him out of his misery tomorrow, I would. | ||
| And when I was young, I was glad there was Planned Parenthood around when I got in trouble with a few girls or whatever. | ||
| So I'd be a hypocrite to say, but there's way too many abortions, I'll go with that. | ||
| I mean, this is ridiculous what's going on. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Isn't it strange, though, that those positions, which I'm with you, I describe myself, I'm begrudgingly pro-choice. | ||
| I wish I didn't have to be. | ||
| Begrudgingly, good word. | ||
| But I know several women that have had abortions in the last, I don't think I can take that away from them, but I completely get the pro-life side. | ||
| But even to take those positions, you just said, If you're going to take anything that's not on the progressive side, you're one of the bad guys. | ||
| Yes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Well, that's what it is. | |
| You have to check off all the boxes. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Well, you're a Nazi or whatever. | ||
| And this whole, you're a bigot. | ||
| Who do you think you are that you can label somebody? | ||
| That is, to me, unbelievable. | ||
| You've never had a racist thought or muttered a racist thing? | ||
| Those are the only people who have the right to call me a bigot, and that person doesn't exist. | ||
| I mean, the sanctimony on those, it is, I can't believe it. | ||
| Yeah, my buddy Pete Boghossian, who's been on the show many times, calls this thing a secular religion. | ||
| And that's what it is. | ||
| It's become a religion. | ||
| That's what it is. | ||
| To these people, yeah. | ||
| Yeah, they put it before anything. | ||
| We got our work cut out for us, huh? | ||
| The solution is a war, folks. | ||
| I don't know what to tell you. | ||
| I mean, oh, we're gonna balkanize and break apart or whatever, and whatever. | ||
| Well, you know, it's funny you say that, but I do see this undercurrent of people talking about that now. | ||
| Do you actually think that that's where we end up? | ||
| Eventually, over years, these ideas just keep percolating. | ||
| Everyone realizes how much they have in disagreement with their neighbor, and then we end up in some horrible place. | ||
| I mean, it's pretty much everything I've been fighting against. | ||
| I've been trying to get these sides to be a little more decent, but I get the impulse on that. | ||
| Yeah, because the gap's too big now. | ||
| There is no middle ground. | ||
| There is no dissenting. | ||
| I use an analogy. | ||
| It's like an athlete's knee. | ||
| Think of Bobby, you are my... It's like, you know, the cartilage is gone. | ||
| Yeah, and now it's just... Now it's bone on bone. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, there's such a gap. | ||
| We're seeing the world through two different lenses. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't see that closing. | ||
| I only see, you know... And social media sort of threw the gas on it and expedited it. | ||
| What do you make about what's going on with the tech companies and censorship and all that? | ||
| Because that also is another thing that should be right in a comedian's wheelhouse, and I don't see these guys doing it. | ||
| I see Seth MacFarlane saying the Family Guy's not gonna do gay jokes anymore, The Simpsons isn't gonna put Apu in episodes, the hardest working guy on the show who was completely welcomed, who was an immigrant that changed Homer's stance on illegal immigration and a gajillion other things. | ||
| That's a cancer in this country. | ||
| Who taught about Indian weddings and Hinduism and veganism? | ||
| How horrible! | ||
| Horrible, right? | ||
| Get him off the TV set! | ||
| Just disgusting, yeah. | ||
| But all of this, it's all related to social media, the way everyone just, we can look at the past and immediately erase it and we're automatically gonna be better and all of this endless bullshit. | ||
| What do you make of all that? | ||
| Well, the tech companies have it out for us. | ||
| Are you starting that thing with Jordan? | ||
| We're working on it. | ||
| Can you count me in? | ||
| I'll count you in. | ||
| I'm still on Patreon. | ||
| Yeah, are you? | ||
| Yeah, and you know, look, they've been fair to me, but you know, I don't want to contribute to a... | ||
| I don't know where their money's going. | ||
| Yeah, you're in. | ||
| We'll have to discuss the rest of it, not when the camera's on. | ||
| Yeah, of course. | ||
| Leave it to me to bring that up. | ||
| That's what I do. | ||
| Well, even just related to that, you know, I saw one guy, it's like a fairly well-known, you know, verified blue-check lefty attacking me in Jordan over leaving because, you know, Carl Benjamin and Sargon of Akkad said the N-word. | ||
| And he said it, and the guy kept saying, if he had said it with an A at the end instead of an R at the end, it would have been okay. | ||
| And I thought, you guys... Dead serious. | ||
| Yeah, completely serious. | ||
| Completely serious. | ||
| Because then it would have been sort of an endearing or at least a colloquial way of saying it, but he said it with a hard R. | ||
| Even though the way he said it was against the alt-right anyway, but putting aside reality for a second. | ||
| But I thought the way you people whittle down everything... It tells you. | ||
| It's not even about a word, it's about the intonation that you say the word with. | ||
|
unidentified
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Right. | |
| It's like... Think about that. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| Just that alone proves you're... And as if you've never said anything, right? | ||
| You've never said it one way or the other way or... No, exactly. | ||
| Oh, I corrected myself. | ||
| Oh, you... Did I say it? | ||
| Yeah, I mean, that proves how silly their arguments are. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But I love that clip of Louie, at Governor's, that clip that surfaced a couple weeks ago. | ||
| Yeah, yeah, yeah. | ||
| So what do you make of that? | ||
| So you and Louie go way back. | ||
| Obviously, everyone knows what happened with him. | ||
| Give me the sort of breakdown. | ||
| Look, I've said it a million times. | ||
| If he did that to my sister, I would have punched him in the face or, you know, a girlfriend or whatever. | ||
| Obviously, that was horrible behavior on his part. | ||
| But, I mean, capital offense? | ||
| Right. | ||
| Ruining his life and career? | ||
| Get over yourselves, ladies. | ||
| I lived with him. | ||
| I do a joke on stage about it. | ||
| Let's differentiate between him and Harvey Weinstein. | ||
| Everybody's being lumped in now. | ||
| What Louis did was horrible, but I do a bit about it. | ||
| I lived with him for a year and a half. | ||
| I saw his dick maybe ten times, four times consensually. | ||
| So, I love him. | ||
| He's a great father. | ||
| He's as smart a guy as I ever met, and I loved him. | ||
| He was always a little reckless. | ||
| But what do you make of that thing? | ||
| I mean, it gets to what I talked about earlier, or what we talked about earlier, about just comedians and sort of being messed up and whatever. | ||
| Like, that thing about, like, he's got everything, right? | ||
| I mean, that PayPal shot, when he had that million bucks just sitting in there, because he sold his special just like that. | ||
| Like, the guy had everything. | ||
| He was respected by everybody, and yet, Some other shit's still going down. | ||
| And I think we all suffer from that at some level. | ||
| It's part of the human condition. | ||
| Yes. | ||
| We're humans. | ||
| We're flawed. | ||
| Louie never cared about money, even when he started Omega at the beginning. | ||
| I was like his big brother. | ||
| He didn't even know how to handle money when we were You know, we first met. | ||
| We went to San Francisco. | ||
| We're doing the punchline. | ||
| Me and him are like co-headlining something. | ||
| He goes, I'm going out to rent the VCR. | ||
| This is back in the early 90s, so we can watch movies at the hotel, whatever. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And we both had literally probably $900 net worth. | ||
| He comes back with a $600 trumpet. | ||
| This is how he... I had to explain to him, you know, the value of money. | ||
| And I still don't think... | ||
| That's not what drives him. | ||
| I know he got all that success commercially and all the money and stuff, but he's... | ||
| He's the most interesting person I've ever met, I think. | ||
| So what do you think? | ||
| You think he's doing the forgiveness machine right, basically, by slowly rolling back in? | ||
| I love what he did. | ||
| He waited around, and he saw the bitching, and he stuck his face out for two minutes, and people were going wild. | ||
| You're gonna let me know when he's at the club! | ||
| He didn't kill babies! | ||
| What the fuck is going on here? | ||
| So he stuck his face out and took the temperature, and there was a bunch of whining and stuff, and he probably thought about it, mulled it over a few months, said, fuck this, I'm coming back. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And I'm throwing haymakers. | ||
| I love the way... All the stuff, all the people that, you know, before this that loved him, now he's the... Right, right, right. | ||
| And the comics, too. | ||
| It's the comics. | ||
| Yeah, but it goes back to that feminist stuff. | ||
|
unidentified
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It always goes back to that. | |
| You know? | ||
| So, he gets back in and then, of course, all the articles were, now he's all right. | ||
| You saw all that? | ||
| Yeah, he's going to be the king of the red stage. | ||
| Better not be, that's my... I've been working there for 30 years. | ||
| All I had to do was whip my dick out and I could... Yeah, and he won't be... No, his comedy will be like it's always been. | ||
| I don't think he will be the... | ||
| But I do have a problem with a few comics out there who are kind of famous, | ||
| who are now getting the label as edgy and anti-PC. | ||
| Who's edgy that you think is actually edgy these days? | ||
| Me. My whole career. | ||
| We should do a show together. | ||
| We should do a show together. | ||
| Yeah, we should. | ||
| All right, we'll do something. | ||
| Edgy is doing jokes, pushing racial, with a table of black people right there, where you could get punched in the fit. | ||
| That's edgy. | ||
| Not going in front of, Patton Oswalt going in front of a thousand nerds. | ||
| That's not edgy. | ||
| It never was. | ||
| You know, me telling how I feel about women, the feminist movement, and doing stuff that could hurt you. | ||
| I've been doing my whole... But you've got to be funny about it first. | ||
| Right, funny first. | ||
| Otherwise you end up preaching. | ||
| Like, Billy Burr, now he's getting labeled as kind of edgy, but Billy's a very liberal guy. | ||
| And to me, his politics of the past helped create this environment. | ||
| I love when they call him racist. | ||
| I was just at a wedding with him a couple weeks ago. | ||
| His wife is black. | ||
| You eating? | ||
| I know. | ||
| I love his wife. | ||
| Billy is the least racist person I know. | ||
| Can you imagine? | ||
| But those guys, you know, I was pushing that a long time ago. | ||
| And now they're like, he's, you know, a nuts Billy. | ||
| Burr right now, to me, is the funniest. | ||
| He's like every guy I grew up with in Boston. | ||
| Just he sounds like every kid I grew up with and and brutally funny | ||
| But my point being those guy a bill Maher was getting all remember bill Maher went after his own audience | ||
| Because of the Muslim thing and stuff. Yeah, but but I said good for bill, but bill you helped create this environment | ||
| I know I'm so like Because I loved him for so many years | ||
| He was like my guy, he was the right kind of liberal, free speech liberal. | ||
| I loved him and I've always wanted to be on the show and I want to do this with him, I really do. | ||
| But these last couple years, even though I think he's still on the right side on the free speech stuff, but when he apologized because of the N-word to Ice-T or whoever it was, it was like, this is bad, this is bad. | ||
| and now his Trump stuff has gotten so, he's become like a caricature of himself. | ||
| And I say that with the most respect, like I want him to be better again or something. | ||
| But what does that tell you about just sort of the way television also has changed? | ||
| 'Cause you've been on "The Tonight Show," | ||
| you've been on "Letterman," | ||
| you've been on all the late night shows. | ||
| They seem completely irrelevant to me now. | ||
| I mean that, I don't mean that putting you down, you know what I mean? | ||
| Just like the machine has now changed. | ||
| At least I did it when Jay was there. | ||
| And I love Jimmy too, I love Fallon too, but it's a whole different. | ||
| And my stuff, I mean I wasn't, you know, when we start comedy, | ||
| at the beginning of your career, you try to have a lot of kind of TV clean, | ||
| 'cause you wanna get some exposure. | ||
| So I wasn't super edgy, but on my first letter, when I did mention a gay woman arguing with me about her dog or whatever, I guess compared to other people, that I made fun of homeless, my opening line, or whatever, so I guess that was kind of edgy. | ||
| But that could at least work then. | ||
| Now you're not getting on The Tonight Show with that. | ||
| Well, it's funny. | ||
| I went to see my buddy Joe List when he did his first Letterman, and the girl said that they wanted me to come back on. | ||
| It was like a casual chat in the green room. | ||
| But she goes, you can't do any cancer stuff any home. | ||
| She starts listing, and I go, I'm all set. | ||
| Thanks. | ||
| As much as I would have loved to have done, you know, one more Letterman or whatever. | ||
| We all should have seen this. | ||
| What's that line from the comedian documentary that Seinfeld did when Orny Adams says he goes on The Tonight Show and they made him change? | ||
| You know, there's one person on this bus, and that person has lupus or something, and that was his joke, because he was the only person on the bus, but they made him change it from lupus to muscular dystrophy, or the other way around. | ||
| Like, the way they look at words, like someone, they had a debate, like a network executive had a debate, like, which is more offensive, lupus or muscular dystrophy? | ||
| I'm honestly not even sure which way it was, which tells you how stupid it is. | ||
| But what do you think about that? | ||
| Just the way that, like, the old days, the old days, like, You know, you wanted to get on Carson so you could do your five, and maybe he invites you to sit down, and if he does, now you're a star. | ||
| That's just gone. | ||
| That's been gone forever. | ||
| I was excited because Jay Leno was one of my influences. | ||
| People laugh when I say, I go, go watch Jay Leno when he used to appear on the Letterman Show in the 80s. | ||
| Jay would have him on three times a month. | ||
| And Jay was the king of stand-up at that point. | ||
| He would go on there. | ||
| I still go home and I Google these sometimes. | ||
| Watch Jay as a guest, how funny he was. | ||
| That's what really pushed me. | ||
| Jay, I grew up about 10 minutes from Jay. | ||
| I go, this guy looks like me, sounds like me, he's Italian, he's Scottish, and sarcastic. | ||
| So that was one of my influences. | ||
| But the whole game has changed. | ||
| Do you think it matters anymore that, like there was a certain magic to this idea | ||
| that you could go through that machine, there was like an actual path to being good and success. | ||
| Yeah, that's all gone. | ||
| Do you miss it at all, or the idea of that? | ||
| And now it's just kind of a free for all? | ||
| I like it now. | ||
| I like that we're all doing our own thing. | ||
| And Keneson, I use it as the model, like Keneson was so offensive and stuff, | ||
| but he became such a cult, had such a cult following, that Hollywood came to him. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Once you get so big, you know, you have so many followers and stuff, Kennison sort of did that. | ||
| He made Hollywood come to him. | ||
| He was outrageous and they finally put him on Letterman and stuff. | ||
| I like what's going on, like as far as me on my podcast being able to cut loose and people are looking for you and guys like you and I now. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| There's very few, I did a gig Friday night in San Diego. | ||
| Uh, the Comedy Palace. | ||
| I was in San Diego Friday night. | ||
| Were you really? | ||
| Yeah, I was in Peterson. | ||
| Did you ever do that little room? | ||
| Uh, I haven't done that, but, well, I was at the Balboa Theater with Peterson, so that's a different thing. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Oh, you should have come to the Comedy Palace. | |
| I pull up and I'm like, ah, it's kind of a restaurant. | ||
| I go in the beautiful comedy room, set up perfectly. | ||
| Probably 150 people, maybe. | ||
| But San Diego, a sweet spot for her. | ||
| It was 60% Latino. | ||
| And they loved me. | ||
| This is when you feel great about being a... Like a Mexican woman in the front. | ||
| She had to be 65 years old. | ||
| She goes to me after the show, say hi to the Twinks. | ||
| Those are my two producers on my podcast. | ||
| She loved my podcast. | ||
| She's like a 65-year-old Mexican woman. | ||
|
unidentified
|
Yeah. | |
| And when I was doing the religious stuff, she was hanging on every word. | ||
| And then it was all these biracial couples, a white guy with a Mexican wife, you know, vice versa. | ||
| And then some white military guys, and they wanted to hear me. | ||
| I'm doing, I'm going to get real political. | ||
| I'm not real, when you come to see me now, it's a mix. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But my next album is going to be all punk, because people are waiting to hear. | ||
| They perk up when I go into the political stuff. | ||
| Yeah, well, there's definitely a need for this type of political thing in stand-up, which is what I'm doing, but that's what I was gonna ask you. | ||
| Do you even consider yourself political per se? | ||
| No. | ||
| Yeah, so it's kind of bizarre, right? | ||
| Colin Quinn, and I've used this at every interview I've ever done, Colin Quinn said it 20 years ago, and I said, I'm not really a political comic, I'm not really conservative. | ||
| He goes, Nick, but you're the type of guy, you could be telling a McDonald's joke and people can tell how you voted. | ||
| Yeah, that's good. | ||
| Which is a great quote. | ||
| That sums it up. | ||
| I go after the macro. | ||
| It's more cultural with me, you know? | ||
| I don't go up there and talk about the farm bill that went in the toilet. | ||
| I'm more macro. | ||
| I always push the racial stuff because to me that's the one issue that is the biggest gap between how it's discussed privately As opposed to publicly. | ||
| That's the biggest lie. | ||
| I can't watch another home alarm commercial where the five criminals are white. | ||
| I said that 20 years ago. | ||
| Look at the dumb white father in the commercial. | ||
| On my first album in 1994 I said it. | ||
| I think I was listening to Rush at the time, you know, and he sort of made me aware. | ||
|
unidentified
|
But I watch these commercials and it's just hilarious. | |
| But it's weird how everything's become political, right? | ||
| Like it didn't used to be. | ||
| I was always doing political stuff. | ||
| I was a political science major, so I was always into it. | ||
| Were you really? | ||
| Yeah, but actually I'm so less interested in politics More so now than I've ever been. | ||
| I like the cultural thing. | ||
| What we're talking about here is cultural, not political per se. | ||
| But it's weird that everything is politics now. | ||
| Our celebrities are politics. | ||
| The Oscars are political. | ||
| SportsCenter is political. | ||
| It's kind of gross, actually. | ||
| Yeah, it was such a media-driven society, and now the social media has added another layer. | ||
| But it's gross. | ||
| It's almost like we don't have lives outside of You know? | ||
| You gotta do the detox. | ||
| I get off on the weekends and I take August. | ||
| No phone, no nothing. | ||
| All of August? | ||
| All of August. | ||
| No news, no talk. | ||
| Try to avoid CNN while you're... You can't. | ||
|
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It's almost impossible. | |
| What are you doing, taking a helicopter? | ||
| No, I can't go to an airport. | ||
| I can't go to the gym. | ||
| I can't go to the burger joint. | ||
| Literally, just going to the gym. | ||
| I have to walk around like this, but I did it because I was like, I think you've got to escape some of this lunacy. | ||
| Oh, you have to. | ||
| And I don't even realize it, but yeah, like I accidentally put on a movie the other night. | ||
| It's like Rocky III or whatever, you know, nothing. | ||
| But it felt so good. | ||
| It actually felt like I was eating cotton candy or something, as opposed to watching Tucker and then flipping over. | ||
| Yeah, you're right. | ||
| I mean, and actually Joe List's comic, Young Comics, said that to me a couple years ago. | ||
| He goes, you watch too much news. | ||
| I go, I have to defend myself from assholes like you. | ||
| So how do we push back against the mob? | ||
| That seems to be the big thing now. | ||
| I actually think there's some momentum there. | ||
| I think we're waking up a certain amount of people. | ||
| We are waking up, but here's the problem, Dave. | ||
| What we're watching now is a plan that the left put together 50 years ago. | ||
| Infiltrating schools and all the institutions taking over, you know, Hollywood and it's all coming different. | ||
| That's why they're winning. | ||
| I don't think we will be able to You know what I mean? | ||
| It'll take 40 years to... We have to grab back the institutions, you know? | ||
| Entertainment and... So what does that mean? | ||
| I mean... Well, I guess we're doing it, right? | ||
| We'll be gone. | ||
| We'll be gone. | ||
| That's the problem. | ||
| But I... Unless, again, unless it comes to violence. | ||
| But yeah, it's gonna take forever. | ||
| All's we have, we don't... All's we have is Fox News. | ||
| Fox are the only ones that put me on. | ||
| They're the only ones. | ||
| I can give my liberal credit left and right. | ||
| I can't get a call from the other ones. | ||
| I have an interesting history. | ||
| Well, you can't. | ||
| You're a gay conservative. | ||
| And I don't even call myself a conservative. | ||
| I'm actually a liberal, but I'm a real liberal. | ||
| There's none of us left anymore. | ||
| That's what Louie is. | ||
| Louie couldn't be more fair. | ||
| When we used to argue race, even when I did his show on FX, You know, Horace and Pete, you know, he wrote my book. | ||
| And he would let me look at it first, you know. | ||
| He's an old school liberal. | ||
| He looks at both sides. | ||
| Very thoughtful about it. | ||
| But isn't that the irony with what's happened to the comics? | ||
| Most comics inherently, I think, are libertarians. | ||
| Most comics want to be able to say whatever they want and live however you want. | ||
| And I'm going to live however I want. | ||
| but they've been like-- | ||
| They've been brainwashed. | ||
| Yeah, they've been like, it's brainwashed. | ||
| It's even worse, they've been just infected by this thing that I guess it will, in the short term, | ||
| give them some success or something, so it's easy to do it, you know? | ||
| And what's creeping me out, it's seeped into management now, like people who run the clubs. | ||
| That's what creeps me out, you know? | ||
| I haven't encountered that yet. | ||
| I've heard stories like Kurt Metzger getting in trouble for doing a rape joke and they send him home and don't tell him why. | ||
| And Bobby Slayton going after, you know, joke around with some black woman in the crowd and she got offended and now the helium does want to use him. | ||
| How couldn't you love Bobby Slayton? | ||
|
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I mean, where would Don Rickles be right now? | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| And that was, he did it for all the right reasons. | ||
| Every ethnic joke was for the right reasons, because we're all equal in this country, you freaks. | ||
| When he was on a lot about a few years ago, one of his last appearances, that was probably going on 10 years ago, there were two, they had a camera in a bar next door, like in the lobby, and two black, older black women at the bar or whatever, and Rick closes on going, hey, oi! | ||
| And they're looking around at the camera, you know? | ||
| What are you drinking, man? | ||
| Moonshine? | ||
| Whatever. | ||
| Ripple? | ||
| I'm going. | ||
| Even me, I'm sitting home going. | ||
| And they still don't know where the camera is. | ||
| And you hear Rickles goes. | ||
| And they wonder why they can't get any work. | ||
| Even the crowd at 11 is like, meh. | ||
| But he did it to everybody. | ||
| Everybody across the board. | ||
| Not that you have to. | ||
| That's my rule, too. | ||
| I don't feel I need to be balanced. | ||
| Because when I sit home and I watch how white men are portrayed in commercials and on TV and in movies, I feel no need to balance it out. | ||
| After the show, people go, why did you make fun of white people? | ||
| I go, go home and watch TV. | ||
| Yeah, well it does seem like it's coordinated what's going on. | ||
| This endless thing of straight white men. | ||
| And that politicians are doing it constantly. | ||
| That it's about white men. | ||
| It's like, you are racist! | ||
| You people who call everyone racist, you are racist! | ||
| Congrats! | ||
| Oh yeah, you can generalize now about white guys. | ||
| I mean, I've been hearing that phrase forever. | ||
| Typical, typical frat boy. | ||
| You know, that's code for white. | ||
| Yeah, you said it's coordinated. | ||
| It really is, isn't it? | ||
| I mean, this is where it's like... I say conspiracy. | ||
| Colin Quinn, he goes, it's not a conspiracy. | ||
| It's so big that it's not a conspiracy. | ||
| That's his theory. | ||
| That it infiltrated media and academia. | ||
| They don't even have to coordinate. | ||
| And I'm like, no, I still think there's 10 guys in a room. | ||
| So that's, it depends how far you want to go down, like the Soros. | ||
| The Bilderberg Group, and four of them are gay. | ||
| Naturally, naturally. | ||
| Two of them are black, and I don't know what the other four are. | ||
| But it does feel like an agenda, because they follow a certain, every commercial has that certain, you know, those progressive commercials. | ||
| Gillette, Gillette, you must have loved that one. | ||
| Oh my, I couldn't believe it. | ||
| That's Gillette as in Robert Kraft, you know, as a Patriots, right? | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| Actually, I'm a, you know, I'm a die-hard Pats fan. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I go, I don't even know if I'm gonna watch a Super Bowl. | ||
| Of course, I didn't mean it. | ||
| But it infuriated me. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| But how about the progressive commercials? | ||
| George Soros, that's one of his companies, by the way. | ||
| Progressive Auto Insurance? | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| Those are the worst, as far as emasculating white guys. | ||
| Especially the the latest one the guy he's in a he's got like a members-only jacket on and he's got a black buddy And they're going out and the black guy said Bill's my best friend, but he's really changed He's handing out directions to the club. | ||
| You know that he printed out and and you know can we get some jalapeno poppers, please? | ||
| And he's got khakis on right and he's playing you know air guitar on the dance floor. | ||
| Just this just the I mean It doesn't even bother me anymore because I started picking these things out years ago. | ||
| But this one, it is brutal! | ||
| It would be like having a black guy tap dancing, eating fried chicken in a commercial. | ||
| That offensive. | ||
| And the movie, I just watched that movie Green Book. | ||
| No, I didn't see it. | ||
| Try to watch that one. | ||
| Especially if you're Italian. | ||
| You talk about offensive. | ||
| Oh my God. | ||
| Yeah, yeah. | ||
| Oh my God, as an Italian, I can't believe, we don't, we have a sense of humor about it. | ||
| Thank God Italians have a sense of humor. | ||
| We have a sense, yeah. | ||
| They literally have an Italian guy, he had a wife, beat a foal to whole pizza. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| And eat it. | ||
| And the black guy in the movie doesn't even know how to eat fried chicken. | ||
| He had never had fried chicken. | ||
| He was a stuffy, raised, you know. | ||
| Literally doesn't know how to hold it. | ||
|
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Like a guy at a commercial, an infomercial, doesn't know how to use a carrot peeler. | |
| Oh! | ||
| Has this ever happened to you? | ||
| I mean, it's propaganda, Dave! | ||
| Remember when Anthony Scaramucci had to step down after his two days as comms director, but every joke was about him being Italian and in the mafia, and I didn't see Italians rioting or screaming, and it was just like... No, we did all right, you know? | ||
| That's why we can take it, but this movie... | ||
| It's why I don't go to the movies. | ||
| It was so predictable. | ||
| I should ruin the ending for everybody. | ||
| Oh, I've never had fried chicken before. | ||
| And the Italian guy is just, like, they projected everything, like, black stereotypical behavior on him, his character. | ||
| It was just a reverse of roles. | ||
| They sat down and literally did cross-referencing, it looked like. | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| You know what I mean? | ||
| You ever get worried that, even though you said it's infiltrating the clubs, that, like, management and the rest of Hollywood, they're just not going to get other gigs, or will be passing up on gigs? | ||
| Oh, I've given up on Hollywood. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I've given up on Hollywood a long time ago. | ||
| I'll always, you know, stand up. | ||
| There's always going to be a place, even when they're trying to shut down speech. | ||
| It's going to make it better for guys like us, I think, in the long run. | ||
| But yeah, I've given up on that. | ||
| I like, you know, I mean, if somebody wants to throw me in a film or whatever, I told my agent, I go, the breakdown doesn't say Nick DiPaolo type. | ||
| I don't want to do it. | ||
| Pretty cocky. | ||
| But thank God for stand-up and the internet podcast. | ||
| You think we're going to be better off in a couple of years or not? | ||
| You think? | ||
| I mean, that's where we're at, right? | ||
| When you say better off as a nation or you and I as a... Well, I mean, just generally. | ||
| Look, let's pretend the Civil War doesn't come in five years. | ||
| Where do you think we're at? | ||
| We're on the brink of Civil War. | ||
| You're going bullish on the Civil War thing. | ||
| I don't know where else we can go! | ||
| There's one side that doesn't want to play. | ||
| There's one side that has no, you know, you can't keep calling people bigots. | ||
| People who go out and work and bust their ass, blue collar people, people that make this country great. | ||
| Sounds corny, but they do. | ||
| And you're going to keep pointing your finger and call them racists and bigots and confiscate their money? | ||
| Ocasio-Cortez and her stupid plan. | ||
| 84% if you live in New York City and you're making over 10 million. | ||
| And it's like, yeah, we'd all love to make 10 million. | ||
| Doesn't mean the government gets to take it just because they want to. | ||
| No, that's confiscation. | ||
| But it's moral. | ||
| She said it's moral. | ||
| That's how they do it. | ||
| If you're immoral, right? | ||
| If you're amoral, they can call you whatever you want. | ||
| That's the whole Nazi, you know, Trump's a Nazi. | ||
| If he's a Nazi, you can kill him. | ||
| If you really believe that, right? | ||
| That's what they do. | ||
| That's what gets me the most, that sanctimony on the left. | ||
| Well, they're just doing all the shit that they're claiming everyone else is doing. | ||
| They're projecting on us. | ||
| It's like imagine what it'll be like if these guys have the political power and the tech power. | ||
| Well, you might find out in 2020. | ||
| Well, that's the thing. | ||
| They're gonna do all of the things that they say Trump is doing, but nobody's in jail over free speech right now. | ||
| No, you know, it's like... That's my biggest fear. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| That they have... | ||
| They have labeled Trump, you know, I mean, just relentless on this guy. | ||
| And they create chaos. | ||
| And people eventually are going to get tired of the chaos, even if you like Trump. | ||
| That's what I think their plan was, the left. | ||
| Just constant chaos with this guy, accuse him of everything. | ||
| And eventually, even the people in the middle might go, we have to, this is tiring. | ||
| Right. | ||
| Even though I love what he's done. | ||
| I love how he's exposed the swamp. | ||
| I really, You know, I didn't like him as an entertainer and stuff. | ||
| I never watched any of that garbage. | ||
| I loved him for what he's done to expose these liberal fascists and their crazy ideas. | ||
| You can almost get them to take any position now, too, because if Trump says anything, they're automatically against it. | ||
| So when he's anti-war, they're pro-war. | ||
| I mean, it's actually completely... Is it unbelievable he can manipulate them? | ||
| Yeah, it's like we're scaling back wars, and now they're for more war in Syria? | ||
| You're for staying in Afghanistan? | ||
| Like, what the hell's going on here? | ||
|
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I know. | |
| I thought you were the anti-war progressive. | ||
| I know, they're so blinded. | ||
| And again, and nobody mentions this, everybody goes, why do they hate him so much? | ||
| I go, because he's an alpha male, blonde-haired, blue-eyed billionaire. | ||
| That's why. | ||
| Nobody brings that up. | ||
| He embodies the devil for them. | ||
| An older white guy, billionaire? | ||
| You know, alpha male? | ||
| Who, you know, says he likes to grab women's pussy? | ||
| That's evil to them. | ||
| All that is evil. | ||
| Nobody ever brings up why, you know, they always dance around it on shows on Fox. | ||
| I'm trying to think what you're going to get in the most shit for in the last hour. | ||
| Well, I'm gonna what? | ||
| What you're gonna get the most shit for, for the last hour. | ||
| What do you mean? | ||
| Just as you said, grab them by the pussy. | ||
| It's like, you know, because there's always people waiting. | ||
|
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Yeah. | |
| To, you know, watch something for an hour and find the ten seconds that they can grab them and... And they'll edit it. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| I don't give a fuck. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
|
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|
I really don't. | |
| Yeah, that's all that you can do. | ||
| You can't hurt me anymore. | ||
| But that's not why I love him, because he said that. | ||
| I'm just saying. | ||
| No, no, I got you. | ||
| I got you. | ||
| I always have that in the back of my head. | ||
| Oh, absolutely. | ||
| No, I don't. | ||
| Right before I do an interview, I go, this is how it's going to go. | ||
| How are they going to hurt me? | ||
| Are they going to kick me off my own podcast? | ||
| It's not like I'm on an ABC sitcom or... Right. | ||
| Well, they could start going for servers and, you know, try to bump everybody off all of these social media sites. | ||
| I mean, perhaps there's some people working on a solution to that, if you know what I mean. | ||
| I heard that. | ||
| I'm praying that it's true. | ||
| I'm in the middle of reading his book right now. | ||
| That Guy. | ||
| That Guy. | ||
| And it's brilliant. | ||
| And all I get from the book is you're supposed to do the right thing. | ||
| Who wants to live that way? | ||
| It's very boring. | ||
| Yeah. | ||
| These days, it's better than the alternative. | ||
| No, he's exactly right, but, you know. | ||
| Yeah, I hope that comes to fruition. | ||
| All right, well, let's do a gig together. | ||
| Absolutely! | ||
| Please! | ||
| Yeah, all right, we're gonna make it happen. | ||
| All right, cool. | ||
| Everybody can follow Nick. | ||
| Can I send them to your Twitter? | ||
| Send them to nickdip.com and sign up for my show, The Nick DiPaolo Show. | ||
| It's free on Monday and Wednesday. | ||
| It streams on YouTube and Facebook Live and a few other places. | ||
| And then Tuesday and Thursday it's a Patreon. | ||
| But you can do it all at my website. | ||
| And we made it so simple because I'm not a tech guy either. | ||
| But nickdip.com and that's where you go. | ||
| And come see me live because it's still my bread and butter. |
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