Adam Carolla joins Dave Rubin to dissect Milo Yiannopoulos's UCLA protests, contrasting them with the Reason Rally's civil discourse. Carolla details his "Fuck you money" philosophy, critiques religious hypocrisy regarding hunting and nuclear weapons, and argues for removing malnourished children from parents who cannot afford an 18-cent nutritious meal. He defends voting for Donald Trump over Hillary Clinton's vague promises while warning against replacing God with a state-managed nature cult, ultimately challenging listeners to reject government indoctrination in favor of personal responsibility and moral integrity. [Automatically generated summary]
So I had a couple of big events last week, and I wanted to share some of my experiences with you.
Last Tuesday, I interviewed Milo Yiannopoulos as part of his Dangerous Faggot Tour.
Yes, everyone's favorite gay, bleached blonde British conservative and I did an hour-long sit-down in front of about 400 students at UCLA.
Several hundred more showed up but couldn't get in, and there were about 100 student protesters outside.
Now as I've said dozens of times, you should use your free speech to counter speech you don't like.
This means that in and of itself, the people who came to protest Milo in this event were doing the most American thing you can do, exercising their right to free speech by countering speech they didn't like with use of their own.
The problem here was that many of the protesters weren't there to voice protest.
They were there to actually stop people from entering the venue, toss garbage cans, spit on people, call in bomb threats, and more.
A group of these protesters created a human wall to stop people from getting inside.
Apparently they're opposed to Trump building a wall, but not opposed to building one themselves.
These protesters, all basically college-aged kids, were screaming in the faces of cops who did an incredibly remarkable job of staying calm and collected.
People were smashing on the doors of the building and trying to force their way into the room where we were speaking.
It was pandemonium, but the exact type of pandemonium, that has become totally acceptable on today's left.
And by the way, to be absolutely clear, these liberal protesters are not embracing true liberal ideas in any way.
Liberals should welcome debate and should be open to critical thought and reasoning.
These people had their minds made up before they even heard what Milo was going to say.
He was the enemy, he was a hateful, sexist, racist bigot, and his right to free speech was squashed by their right to be immature children.
It was clear that some of them didn't even know who Milo was, but had succumbed to groupthink which had made them feel like they were part of something instead of really standing for something.
Once the event actually started, Milo and I had a wide-ranging discussion on many hot-button issues from feminism to free speech to the rise of Trump.
The audience was filled with people of every color, sexuality, and walk of life.
At one point, two protesters who managed to get inside started screaming and interrupting our productive conversation.
I explained to the protester that Milo would probably welcome some discussion if she wanted to wait for the Q&A at the end, but she just didn't want to do that.
Instead, when pressed on what she doesn't like about Milo, she simply screamed, I hate you!
It was exactly the type of typical response that's based on emotion, not logic, and is utterly useless in the real world.
We had an interesting, honest discussion and agreed to disagree on a couple of points, such as Milo's casual dismissal of trans rights.
Even though we were rushed out after the Q&A due to a bomb threat, the night was a total success because two people who don't agree on everything had a civil and, perhaps more importantly, an enjoyable conversation.
Actually, the most inspiring part of seeing so many people exercise their right to free speech was the amount of people who came up to me after to tell me that they were actually liberals who've seen the growing regressive attitudes on the left.
A few people told me that they agree with Trump on almost nothing, but felt that voting for him was the only way to break this backwards illiberal ideology.
This is true confirmation of what I've been saying for months.
If the left won't deal with issues like immigration and Islamism honestly, they'll hand voters right over to Donald Trump.
A couple weeks ago, Bill Maher, who I agree with on almost everything, did a piece on Real Time about how the rise of Trump has nothing to do with the left and that his popularity is only a creation of the right.
While I totally disagree with him on this, note how I can disagree with him without slandering him.
See, it's not that hard.
After the event with Milo, I headed to Washington D.C.
for the Reason Rally, where I spoke at the National Mall in front of thousands alongside Bill Nye, Penn Jillette, and my friends Kelly Carlin and Paul Provenza.
We talked about the need to have science and reason be reinserted in our public policy.
I spent most of my speech talking about the free exchange of ideas, and how we, as free thinkers, must be more tolerant than the people who would silence us.
While I saw plenty of tweets saying that the event had been taken over by social justice warriors, I just didn't see anyone shout down anybody or silence anyone for sharing their views.
What I did see was a great mix of people sharing ideas on how to make the country a more reasonable republic.
Throughout the weekend I met tons of people who watched this show, and much like the Milo fans I mentioned, see the ideas of illiberalism growing on the left.
Also like the Milo event, the people at the Reason Rally were from every walk of life imaginable.
And that's when something really big hit me.
We are officially, without question, onto something massive here.
Something that sparked in my head after that fateful battle between Ben Affleck and Sam Harris and continued through Charlie Hebdo and now our election season has sparked in so many of your heads as well.
Some of you beat me to the punch and some of you are just coming around now.
That's exactly what it's all about.
Ideas out there in the ether to be picked up by us when we're ready to accept them.
I've sensed this awakening for a while now, and I've seen it grow and take form.
But right this very moment, we are on the precipice of a legitimate movement.
The ideas of true, honest debate and discussion and fact-based reason are crossing the political divide in a way nothing else is doing right now.
It may not translate into this election the way we want it to, or it may not stop regressive attitudes from continuing to corrupt young minds tomorrow, but I have no doubt that this game is on.
Some Trump supporters see it, some liberals see it, I see it, and you see it.
It's too late to be silenced by those who won't let you speak up in the first place.
All of us who have been abandoned by the extremes on both sides are coming together in a whole new way.
I'm incredibly proud to say that I think we've had a little something to do with a movement that is going to shock the world.
We've built this while they've been fighting and stammering and silencing.
Our moment is coming and it's only a matter of time before mainstream wakes up to our message of conversation instead of condescension.
Our work is cut out for us, there's no doubt about it, but I've never been sure that we're on the right path.
Adam Carolla is a comedian, a TV host, a director, and a podcast king.
He's created, starred in, and guested on many TV shows such as The Man Show, Catch a Contractor, Dancing with the Stars, and Celebrity Apprentice.
Yeah, well, you know, Glendale, the thing about Glendale and Aurra, it's always been sort of a, I don't know if you know this, but people have always made this spiritual pilgrimage to Glendale.
A lot of scheming, a lot of, you know, folks coming in here trying to find themselves, and so that's why Aurra obviously settled in Glendale.
Yeah, so it's sort of like the Mecca of It's a sort of, if LA had a Sedona, that it would be Glendale.
And then somebody else went, and then one of the Armenians who was a little more entrepreneurial started putting up the first, you know, steak shake shack or whatever they have over there.
Maybe there's a Shake Shack or a Steak and Shake or a Shake Steak and Bake coming or a Bake Steak Shake Shack.
I just like the fact that we're not fat enough.
Like, what do we need?
Can we stuff something in a hot dog on a stick?
Yeah, but what if we put cheese inside the hot dog?
So he's saying, don't put the, no, no, dip it in the batter, just put the cheese.
All right, what if we just, what if I butt funnel Velveeta while I eat this?
Well, we could do that, but we'd be better off just putting the Velveeta in the cheese.
And oh, then we'll put the whole thing in the crust of a pizza.
Don't put the hot dog in the, hold on, we'll take the liquid cheese, we'll put it in the hot dog stick, and we'll roll that into the crust of the pizza.
I have mangria, I have an endless rant IPA, which people seem to enjoy a lot, and I should be in the food business, because I think I just invented A hot dog on a stick cheese infused pizza crust.
I'm going to start a place at the mall called Middle of the Stick where I just pull the stick out of hot dogs on a stick and you just eat the weird little burnt batter that's in the middle of the stick.
If you're going to be who you are, you can't come pulling up in a Rolls Royce these days, even though Michael Moore can afford a fleet of Rolls Royces.
He still can't.
You've got to join the masses, pretend you're one of them, and then you go back to your double-gated community.
She just scraped away the thick layer of marzipan and whatever sugary goo she'd cover herself in to hide this inner I don't know, angry, straight-talking, straightforward, smart, funny, in your face, abrasive, whatever, to do syndicated TV.
You know, it's funny, I grew up on Long Island, which is where she's from, and did stand-up, and I loved her as a comic in the 80s on that, what was that VH1 show they did, remember?
And then I sort of missed those years of the Rosie O'Donnell Show, but then I, when she was on The View, I loved her, and then we've actually become friends.
So like, I missed that sort of fake chunk, but I totally hear you, that everyone sort of pick, if you're in this business, you pick this idea of who you are versus who you are.
I just get to be myself because I don't feel like I have some inner asswipe or racist or misogynist or whatever or xenophobe that's hiding within me that I have to kind of You know, like the preacher who's talking about, you know, one man laying down with another man, might as well lay down with a donkey or bees to burn in the next, you know, some airport banging feet with some dude.
And it's like, oh, oh, that's who, oh, that's who he is.
It's a skateboard, but we've decided that 24-year-old rappers can no longer walk through LAX on their own.
They must be propelled.
So what God did is he went, you know what?
I'm going to have that shit catch on fire in the middle of the night.
I mean, is there anything that, look, I'm an atheist, but I know acts of God.
You're firing up your electronic cigarette, the thing blows up, it takes out your eye, or this thing's sitting in the hallway recharging in the middle of the night and bursts into flames just spontaneously.
Yeah, I'm looking actually, speaking of atrophy, I'm looking to have the house made into a zero-gravity environment so the kids literally could just float into the kitchen, stuff their face with some pizza that's stuffed, the crust is stuffed with corndogs and cheese and then float back.
They'd see their hoverboard floating by.
Their vape cigarettes would be like, they'd be reaching, they'd be reaching, they'd be riding the hoverboard,
but upside down and floating around with the vape.
The smoke, the vape wouldn't know where to go, 'cause it'd be like no gravity.
You know, I know you're a man of your word because you have to get sponsors for your show and you are right now making it clear that you don't want the big hoverboard money.
Yeah, I'm not into Big Board or Big Vape, but, you know, if the folks from Roundtable or Pizza Hut are listening, we may be able to collaborate on a project.
So if you're at the beach all day, and you want to listen to some tunes from your cell phone, either way, all these activities I never participate in, and it's always pissing me off.
And now I gotta somehow get right again with the universe so I will find Jesus Christ and then I'll apologize and then he'll forgive me and then I'll get to get on with my life.
I feel like Not growing up around it, not having a catastrophic event, not even sort of hitting rock bottom emotionally, like, like, hey, I'm rudderless.
I don't know where to go with myself.
Like, I don't know what my, you know, what am I doing on this planet?
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And or the rarefied air of Somebody, you know, like your Muhammad Ali in the Nation of Islam goes, hey man, you want a cool gig?
Here's a bow tie.
Come on down.
Yeah, or you know, maybe you're Tom Cruise and somebody comes, you know, like there are religions that the rarefied air of like that might recruit the celebrity, which I'm open to.
You know, we pull their ceremonial garb over my three-piece suit.
My mom's crying, my dad's not there, of course, never met the man.
But the point is, we do that, I get coached up, and then I start, you know, wearing the hat, kind of working it in, you know, and I think it'd be worth the SUV and whatever kind of wham, what I call walking around money, that religion might provide.
Because that's pretty much, I walk around all day and I watch the news and I listen to people and I think 90%, I look on Twitter, 90% of people are just morons.
Well, so what this guy, Chris Pratt goes out and shoots a deer and then he makes deer jerky out of it and then he gives it to his friends and then actually some people shoot the deer and they give the meat to a homeless shelter.
Didn't that story kind of, like, get to how stupid everything is?
Because I saw all these people immediately.
You have to tranquilize it!
You have to tranquilize it!
Yeah.
And then experts came on.
And experts said, well, the gorilla is so big, there would have... and the time between where it could have just grabbed the kid and killed it like that, you could not have tranquilized it.
Nobody was saying, we were for shooting it.
They weren't thrilled to shoot it, right?
You make the point.
That gorilla, this is a good animal that nobody wanted to kill.
At some point, alerted some officials, but obviously because of my celebrity status, I'd probably have to work through my publicist first and try to map out a strategy.
You know, you don't dive right into these things and next thing you know, you're splashed all over the headlines, bad father, you know.
And I'd probably wait, you know, I'm not a CHP patrolman.
But, you know, I did love Lyme for a while.
I sat next to Dr. Drew, he's an addiction medicine specialist.
I do know there's a part when you consume alcohol where you will actually test lower because you haven't absorbed the alcohol.
And then there's another part where you're tested, you know, breathalyzer, where you're actually lower where it's passed through your system.
So I'd probably give it a waiting period.
Tell the alcohol, whatever alcohol, I'm assuming if I'm at the zoo, I'm bombed, right?
There's nothing to do but the people that eat there are fatter.
Then jump in the hut.
So I'd, just to quickly answer your question, wait till my alcohol level went down.
I don't need, hey, drunken, you know, C-Lister, let his kid fall in the thing.
Talk to my representation.
And then alert officials.
And then after that, I'm not a zoo expert, so I'd let the zoo, whatever their title is, I'd let them handle it.
But I don't blame the mom.
Here's why I don't blame the mom.
Those people who eat the hamburgers but don't like the hunters, who hate nuclear devices but have no solution to the thousands, hundreds of thousands of people being slaughtered on the mainland of Japan, and who, if If that kid fell into the gorilla pit and somehow was extracted and the gorilla was fine, or even got one of those airplane donut pillows out of the deal, then those people wouldn't be calling for the head of the mother.
So the gorilla gets shot in the head and now we need mama's head to roll.
The way I look at it is mama's roll is the same One gorilla is not harmed.
The other gorilla takes a bullet to the head.
Mama's role didn't change.
So my feeling is, just because the gorilla got shot, it doesn't change Mama's actions.
How many blowhards who took to the Tweedusville and decided to write something heroic down are now volunteering at the animal shelter or working with the big felines or anything?
I don't even remember what the story was or who the dentist was.
I don't get it.
People are like, aren't you outraged?
And I'm like, no.
And they're like, why?
And I'm like, I figure since we've been talking about 5 lines have been killed, and then 3 lines killed 5 human
Fuck you money comes in and I did it to this horrible witch who bought another house of mine who was trying to sue me for a cracked foundation three years after I sold her the house and they're doing like hearings and stuff and I said you know their whole thing is like give me $10,000 it'll go away give me 25 grand it'll go away Here's where that fuck me money comes in.
I'll spend $100,000 on an attorney way faster than I'll give you $10,000.
Way faster.
That's F me money.
I'm down $90,000 and I don't give a shit.
Because I like morality better than I like money.
And I will definitely, by the way, neither shyster got a penny because they're not going to sue, because they can't sue, because they don't have a fucking case.
But the point is, I am perfectly willing to give Mark Geragas $100,000 not to give you $8,000.
Going back, you know, 20 years ago, and all I said was, hey, if you can't afford kids, don't have kids.
And if you do have kids, you make them breakfast.
And, you know, and also said things like pot should be legal.
Like I should be able to grow a pot plant in my backyard.
I'm not hurting anyone.
I'm paying taxes.
It's my land.
I theoretically own this parcel of land.
If I would like to smoke marijuana or grow a marijuana plant, now if the government catches me opening up a marijuana stand next to the kids' lemonade stand, then you may intervene.
But as long as I'm on my property, and this is my plant, and I'm using this plant like I would use scotch or vodka, then I don't see what the deal is.
Gay marriage?
Do what you want.
Pot?
Smoke out.
That's all I've ever said.
And nobody ever called me a conservative or Republican or anything close to anything when all I said was get a job, pay your taxes, don't count on the government.
If you have kids, raise your own kids.
The biggest problem we have is Stupid people shitting out kids who can't afford those kids.
The biggest problem we have is broken families.
Who's filling up the prisons?
Who's in rehab?
Who's falling between the cracks?
Who are all these people that are working at McDonald's in their 30s, you know what I mean?
How are these people supposed to raise a family of 19?
If they are getting back to Cecil, if they're committing the lion's share of the terrorist attacks, then yes.
But I'm saying, I don't like poverty, I like education, I don't like broken families, I don't like people living off the grid and having to use these check cashing places, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like the prisons filled, I don't like this, that, and then you're going, oh wait, this race, no wait, no, that race for this thing, no, this race, no, let's see, check cashing, oh, oh, you're anti-Mexican.
Families, oh, that's anti-black, blah blah blah, there's none, by the way, Don't we discriminate against Jews?
I thought the whole point is we're supposed to hate Jews?
And then all that work that they always say white people won't do, that's what I did for a living.
I got out of high school and I cleaned carpets and I dug ditches.
Like when they go, you'll be digging ditches, like they do it as a metaphor for you're going nowhere.
You literally did it.
Well, they were, I mean, to be fair, they're not ditches, they're footings or caisson holes
or whatever it is you're doing on a construction site.
You're doing a construction site, you're pouring a footing or you're pouring a grade beam,
you got to dig the ditch to pour the grade beam or the footing.
Or in some cases, if you can't get a caisson rig in there, you got to dig deep enough to
pour a caisson in place.
And that's, we had to dig it by hand.
I was down at the bottom of the thing with like a chipping stick and a guy had a five-gallon bucket with a rope on it and I'd fill it with a sawed-off flathead shovel and then they'd tow it up and they'd go up and throw it in the dumpster and And that's what I did.
And so I understand when people go, uh, listen, these poor people, they can't eat right.
There's 5,000 PSAs talking about feed your kids, drink water, you know, run around with your kids, read to your kids while they're running around and drinking water.
Like, we're begging everyone to read.
No, listen.
I get it.
Like, the deal is, I—when I worked, and I was poor, and I worked with other poorish people, these guys, when it comes to lunchtime, and they had $4, are not going down to Jamba Juice and spending $4 on a smoothie with a bunch of kale and beet juice in it.
Like, they're not—they're not going to do that.
They're going to Taco Bell.
Because they've been working all day and they want some beef, or something that smells like beef.
That's what they're going for.
They want savory.
Now they understand that what they're doing is not exactly healthy, but they're engaging in it anyway.
And we do this thing where it's like, well it's all about information.
It had some kind of mystery meat crumb on top of it.
Every vegetable, whether it was green beans or corn, was Korea war surplus like literally you know that that feeling that taste of like this green bean has been floating in water for so long that I can only feel it in my mouth yeah it's almost starchy no taste at all like so we talk about like free this system and free that free this for first off you're sending your kids to school and they're just giving them crap and poison anyway so how good a parent are you and then this deal of like
Hey, these people can't afford this.
You want their kids to go hungry?
Well, first off, the kid's 11 and he's 214 pounds, so I don't think he's going hungry.
Then, number two, I read a study, but I've always just said it anyway.
I don't need studies.
With a couple of walnuts and a little brown sugar and some raisins, it's 18 cents.
I was listening to Hillary's speech and her entire speech had nothing to do with the economy and had nothing to do with, you know, infrastructure or anything.
It was just all their people, you know, she was going to level the playing
fields.
She was going to level, there's a lot of people, all the have-nots, she was going to make sure
all the have-nots had theirs.
I don't know how you can do that from an Oval Office, let's say, 3,000 miles away from where
some of those have-nots are, but she was going to make sure that all the people that didn't
have, none of it, no part of her speech talked about rolling up your sleeves, getting to
work, focusing on the family, you know, steering the country back, shrinking the government,
Her thing was just like, everyone with problems, they're over now.
Just like, hope and change, nothing happened.
Hope for what?
Change?
I don't know.
Nothing.
Nothing happened.
I'm tired of politicians that are basically like spoon-feeding everyone.
You know, when they do those town halls and somebody raises their hand and they go, I'm a mother of five, I dropped out of high school.
For more of Adam's ranting and ravings, I literally did not look once at my swastikas over here, you guys can check out the Adam Carolla podcast at adamcarolla.com.