Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have.
Spreading joy and good cheer all across the fruited plain while remaining firm and resolved and fearless.
I am Rush Limbaugh bravely serving humanity here behind a golden EIB microphone on the Excellence in Broadcasting Network.
The telephone number, if you would like to be on the program 800-282-2882, the email address rush at EIBnet.com.
What was the name of that syndrome that the woman called about trying to explain why people send flowers and cards to Barbaro, the horse?
Parasocial something disorder.
Yeah.
Well, the theory, theory.
It.
Parasocial relationship theory.
Woman called to say that's the explanation for so many people reaching out, like to Princess Diana when she had died and the horse.
And even before the horse had died.
By the way, we learned last hour the horse's last meal was grass.
What is it again?
Para-social abnormal theory.
Parasocial relationship theory.
Basically, what it means is that people are able to have one-way relationships with entities like celebrities, soap opera star, movies, actors, horses, princesses, and so forth.
Well, if you are a person who is, it would be correct to call it an affliction, or I'm gonna have to write this dawn one more time.
Para, what?
Para parasocial relationship theory.
Look at, I'm gonna, it's gonna, I'm it's, it's a disorder on this show.
I'm calling it a disorder.
There's nothing normal about it.
But for those of you who are afflicted with this know this.
If you go to the Churchill Downs website, there is this little note, Churchill Downs Incorporated president and CEO Robert Evans.
This is yesterday released, the statement following news that Barbaro was humanly euthanized after additional health complications.
Churchill Downs Incorporated the entire Kentucky Derby family deeply saddened by the passing of Barbaro.
Churchill Downs and the Kentucky Derby Museum will position large condolence cards at their main customer entrances on Wednesday, January 31st that will be tomorrow offering customers and race fans the opportunity to send personal messages to the connections of Barbaro following his.
What personal messages to the connections of Barbaro following his death on January 29th?
For more information, click here.
So apparently you're going to be able to go by Churchill Downs.
There gonna be giant cards up there and you can write a message of condolence to the horse.
I'm reading it as it's written here, offering customers and race fans the opportunity to send personal messages to the connections of Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro.
Follow messages to the connections, oh oh oh, oh.
It oh oh.
Rather than say family members oh, Snurdly tells me, the connections mean the trainers, the owners, oh.
Why don't they just say that?
Because when I think connections, I'm thinking send a message to heaven, to Barbaro.
How else would you interpret this?
The opportunity to send personal message to the connections of Barbaro.
They should just say family members or friends or relatives or some such thing.
They never got a chance to get married, Snerley.
See, that's one of the sad aspects of this.
All right, so I wanted to pass this on.
For those of you who have parasocial relationship disorder, Churchill Downs is opening.
It's a disorder on this program, Snerley.
I just told people this.
They may call it theory on this program.
I'm calling it a disorder.
I mean, do this with compassion, and we do this with great sensitivity.
All right, back, ladies and gentlemen, to the issues of the day.
As you know, John Kerry, who served in Vietnam, went to Davos, Switzerland, and posed for pictures with all of our enemies and joined in their criticism of his own country, calling the United States a pariah.
We women of the United States have a very clear message for every single presidential candidate, including or especially Hillary Clinton.
And we women say Paul out now.
Sounds like an old form of birth control.
Certain religious leaders would approve.
We're back.
El Rushbo, and that was, by the way, Paul Shanklin as John Kerry, and they call the USA a pariah.
We'll get to your phone calls.
A couple things I have to do after the break.
And I want to address this business of the people spoke in the 2006 election.
I'm getting tired of hearing it.
I'm getting tired of the Democrats claiming a mandate when they ran on nothing.
And this, other than their hatred for George W. Bush, they have no plan for anything, particularly Iraq.
They really ran on nothing, but they're giving themselves a mandate.
Their propagandist buddies in the drive-by media are doing the same thing.
One more thought, though, again, about Barbaro.
I shared this in the last hour, but there's a new tune-in factor at every moment of this program.
It just hit me during a commercial break in the last hour.
If the Republicans had just been patient and waited and tried to save Barbaro instead of Terry Shaivo, things would be a lot different in Washington today.
If they had just saved the passion and the love and the respect for life and the concern that they had for Terry Shaivo, if they just saved that for the horse Barbaro, Republicans would own Washington to this day.
Back in a second.
Great to be with you today, ladies and gentlemen.
Rush Limbaugh here, serving humanity.
Half my brain tied behind my back just to make it fair.
I'll do the people spoke business.
People have been on hold since the beginning of the program, and I really do appreciate their patience.
Let me go make sure their wait is as little longer as possible.
Pat in Stanford, Connecticut.
Thanks for your patience.
Welcome to the program.
Megadidos, Rush, how are you?
Good.
Hey, I'll get right to my point.
I was told to.
So I guess I'm going to continue to kick a dead horse here, but with regards to Barbara last night on the network news, I'm sorry I cannot recall which network it was, but in that case, this is really, really bad news to the networks.
I mean, people are watching the news.
They just don't know which one when they're watching it.
It all gets to be kind of the same after a while.
Let me ask you this.
Was the anchor male or female?
You know, if it was female, I could definitely say it was more than likely Katie, but I can't recall.
I just kind of walked by this TV and saw what was on and noticed, oh, there's some news about Iraq and Najaf and what appears to be something of a victory we had there.
And of course, they let off with Barbaro, which kind of just blew my mind in the fact and kind of reaffirms a lot of what you said with regard to the drive-by media, really not wanting to in any way explain any kind of a victory over there.
Oh, no, they can't allow it.
They can't survive it.
They cannot survive.
Like we talked in the first hour, the New York Times headline on this is just hilarious.
Let me find it again because I let off the program with it.
I must have let it aside somewhere.
But it's like questions.
Oh, here it is.
Here it is.
Hang on just a sec.
Missteps by Iraqi forces in battle raised questions.
We only killed 470 bad guys.
The Iraqis did it.
But there were missteps.
There were missteps.
Raise questions.
Cannot permit, folks cannot survive a victory in Iraq.
They're so invested in defeat now.
This is not even politics anymore.
It's business.
It's pure business.
Survival.
They just can't.
They've already proclaimed defeat.
They've been invested in it and hopeful for it.
There's no place they can go to turn the thing around.
They can't find the way to get themselves back on the side if we win of having supported it.
Pelosi may think her little seeing eye trip over the weekend to the region might provide an opportunity to do so and maybe a hedge, but other than their propagandists in the drive-by media, I don't see how they can possibly do it.
So that's a great observation.
Barbaro led all newscasts yesterday, cable and everywhere, all day long.
Look, as I mentioned yesterday, I understand it in a lot of ways.
And I understand it psychologically with parasocial normal relationship disorder, whatever it is.
I threw away the piece of paper I wrote it down on, so screw it.
Patrick Jefferson City, welcome to the EIB Network.
Hello.
Hey, Megan Dittos, Rash.
Thanks for taking my call.
Hey, I was talking to a guy I work with, and he turned me on to an article by an organization that I know you're really fond of, the Council of Foreign Relations.
They have an article for a paper.
Wait a second.
Wait a second.
What do you mean an organization I'm fond of?
Council of Foreign Relations.
I mean, Jeff Rush.
But they have a paper, and I apologize.
I don't know the correct term.
I don't read their stuff that often.
It's called Foreign Affairs or Policy Review.
It's a little monthly that all their scholars write articles in it now and then.
I think it's policy review is what it's called, the official publication of the CFR.
Okay, well, yeah, I saw it on their website.
They say that there are people in Iraq that are disillusioned, that are losing their will to fight, that are questioning their leadership, and that these people are the insurgents, and that it's the insurgency right now that's falling apart.
And when I read this, this was before the offensive in the Jaff and the victory that we've had in the last several days.
And I just was going to say I'm surprised this isn't getting ready to go.
Yeah, I got a question for you on this.
Since the CFR is the seat of the secret conspiracy to one world government, what in the world would be the point of putting this story out that the insurgents are losing heart, they're having trouble staying unified and so forth.
What will be the purpose of this?
I leave that up to you, Rush.
You're the expert.
That's true.
I was just very surprised to be reading this anywhere in that everybody else is talking about this.
And again, this was before what happened in the job.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm as surprised that you would be reading this as I am surprised that they have said it.
I don't doubt this.
Every communication or every killed Zarkawi, we killed Al-Mushafi.
And every time we've done this, they've had papers and we've intercepted letters that they've written to Bin Laden or Al-Zawahiri.
And they've all been complaining for the last year and a half that they are having trouble and that their strength is weakening and so forth.
They need money and they need reinforcements.
And in each one of these letters, they talk about the value of the American media in sustaining their cause.
They know how to play that and make that work for them.
So I haven't seen this thing in the CFR's publication, but it doesn't surprise me that it's the truth.
I can't explain its publication other than the fact that nobody sees this other than other policy wonks, diplomats, the striped pants crowd, they wear the shoes that lace up, the official diplomat shoes.
Everybody I've ever seen in any kind of official Washington bureaucracy, guys, wear these shoes.
I don't know where to go get them.
There's probably a diplomat shoe store somewhere in some mall in Washington, or maybe in the Capitol.
They're identical.
No, they're not wingtips.
They're not.
No, no, no, no.
I'm not talking about wingtips.
You can get wingtips anywhere.
No, no, no.
I have a pair.
I have a pair.
But I got them at an Italian store.
I got them Brioni in Manhattan.
But I saw Sandy Burgler wearing them when I was on Meet the Press with him, when the Clinton administration was worried about a sack full of anthrax, what it could do to the.
And he was wearing those shoes.
I mean, Colin Powell wears.
Every diplomat, the Striped Pants crowd, there's an official diplomat shoe.
I'm not, I mean, I know it sounds like I'm making this up, but there's a uniform, unspoken.
It's not published anywhere, but those are the kind of people going to see this.
And they're not going to have their minds changed by it.
They're just going to think that the CFR is giving space to somebody who doesn't necessarily agree with the official line of the CFR to show balance.
The way these things usually happen.
Jeff in Bellingham, Washington, you're next on the EIB network.
Hello.
Hi there, Rush.
Listen real quick.
I'm on my way to work and got to make this short.
In the waning days of the last Congress, they did do something to help Barbaro.
One of the last bills they passed just before the election, if I am correct in my memory here, prevented horses from being sold for meat.
So, you know, this protected Barbaro from becoming, say, sausage.
This is a very, very, very lame attempt, sir, to not only insult the memory of the horse, but lame, lame, lame attempt to try to somehow give Republicans credit for trying to save Barbaro simply by passing legislation that said you can't sell horses for meat.
I hadn't even heard that.
I mean, I don't doubt that it's true.
Guy's not going to call here and only have a couple minutes where he has to go to work and lie.
But that's, you know, you, I mean, I would be a fool if I tried to say to people, hey, don't forget the Republicans.
They love Barbaro.
They passed a bill saying he can't be sold for meat.
Look, it's a lost opportunity.
They just couldn't wait.
They just, Terry Shaivo, if they just waited, just been patient.
Can you imagine the same daily efforts to save Terry Shivo if the Republicans, you think Bill Frist would like to have this back?
You think Tom DeLay would like to have this back?
These guys could have gone all Jeb Bush to say Barbara.
Republicans would have won everything in a landslide in November.
Back in just a moment.
Hey, welcome back, folks.
There are only rare moments, only rare occasions.
I wish we had a ditto cam on the other side of the glass so you can see how one little statement by me causes a massive argument to take place in there.
I just did it during the break.
We were talking about cheerleaders.
This new Title IX of cheerleaders have to cheer.
They don't want to.
They have to cheer at the girls' events, have to cheer at the boys' events.
They have to cheer at all, and nobody likes it.
The cheerleaders don't like cheering for girls.
The guys probably like watching it.
But the boys don't like it.
I mean, it's, yet they got to do it.
They have to do it.
And it's.
It's part of sports equality, Mr. Limbaugh.
Title IX, it's working.
Right.
All right.
The people spoke in the 2006 election.
I am worn out hearing this.
And Democrats are running around saying it all the time, countless times a day, in an attempt to claim a mandate.
I know I shouldn't be, but I'm always surprised how politicians seize upon a phrase or a focus group line and with the help of the propagandists and the drive-by media, repeat it and repeat it and repeat it and turn it into an urban legend, an urban legend that becomes accepted truth.
How many times have you heard the people spoke in 2006?
And you hear it from the left, you hear it from the anti-war crowd, you hear it from the anti-Bush crowd, you hear it from pundits, from the paid politician hatchet crowd, even hear it from some rhino-Republicans.
And that's what really irritates me.
Like Sam Brownback, who is out there saying the president ought to listen to what Democrats have to say about Iraq.
It's interesting, is it not?
When the people spoke in 2004 and re-elected President Bush by almost 4 million votes, meaning 4 million people, the so-called people spoke crowd did everything they could to block what the people spoke for.
Social Security reform, permanent tax cuts.
They continue to gin up anti-war fervor in the country.
What happened to the people spoke in 2004?
Well, when the people don't speak the way Democrats want them to speak, then they've got to be shut up and they've got to be lied about and they have to be ignored.
And the point is, we're not talking about reality here.
We're talking about propaganda.
Look, let's play the game.
People spoke in 2006.
Really?
Okay, let's say they did.
What did they really say?
Let's take a look at the Senate.
In West Virginia, the people spoke, but they didn't speak against the war.
They voted against Macau.
And if you think Jim Webb is the senator from Virginia because of anything to do with the war, then you are a blithering idiot.
Jim Webb is the senator from Virginia because George Allen said macaca and the Washington Post made it a crusade to make sure that word and that statement of Allen's was in the news every day in Ohio.
The people didn't speak against the war.
They spoke against the state's corruption scandals and the mismanagement on the part of Republicans.
Do you think the new senator from Ohio is elected because of the war?
Guarantee it wasn't.
The people in Ohio spoke about corruption.
I mean, we can go to Missouri if you want to.
Do you think Claire McCaskill was elected to the Senate because of her opposition to the war?
She was not.
She was elected to the Senate on a false, lying TV commercial about the promise of embryonic stem cells.
If you think the people spoke against the war in Rhode Island, you think Lincoln Chafee lost because he was against the war, then somebody explained to me how it is that Joe Lieberman won in Connecticut when he was for the war.
So the next time you hear the words the people spoke in 2006, remember this.
You are not being told what the message of the people was.
You are listening to political ventriloquists putting their words into your mouth.
And that's not democracy.
It's not representative republicanism.
It's pure propaganda and demagoguery.
The people spoke.
Let me tell you something.
If it were true, if the people spoke in the 2006 elections to get out of Iraq, we would have already defunded it.
The people would have demanded it.
The Congress would have no jitters whatsoever about defunding the war.
But they don't have the guts yet.
They will do it.
The Democrats will try to do it if that's what it takes to secure defeat.
They cannot survive politically a victory in Iraq.
Now, here is Sue in Hagerstown, Maryland.
Hi, Sue.
Nice to have you on the EIB network.
Hey, Russ.
You're talking about reality.
People need to hear the real world truth about this horse.
Oh, goody.
Tell us what we don't know.
It's not love that kept that horse alive.
It's the money.
His essence, as we shall call it, is worth millions.
And I'm sure that they've been taking his essence ever since he became injured.
Have you ever seen a vial of semen?
Now, have I ever seen a vial of semen?
Yes.
In the first place, don't lose that question.
I want to come back to that, but we learned something about thoroughbred racing yesterday, and that is that they can't do what you suggest.
They cannot artificially inseminate a mare with the sperm.
It has to happen naturally.
It has to be as God made horses do it.
And those are the rules of thoroughbred racing.
So I'm sure that there's a lot of investment in this money, and they were hoping the horse could be put up stud.
There's no question they were trying to save the horse.
But for you to suggest there was no love and that there was no affection for this great animal, how insensitive can you be?
It's the real world truth.
Now, what is this question?
Have I ever seen a vial of semen?
What do you think of me?
They're so tiny, they're only the size of a coffee stirrer.
And that's all it takes.
A vial of semen is only the size of a coffee stirrer.
That's correct.
That's all it takes.
So you're correct.
Yeah, but the rules are the rules.
They can't do what you suggest.
By the way, how do you ever know?
How did anybody else?
I'm sorry.
What was that?
Have you ever known anybody to break the rules?
Like, what a cynic.
I think if you're talking millions or billions of dollars, it's going to be broken.
That's not...
I don't know where to go with this.
You are...
You are calling here to accuse the great owners of Barbaro of breaking the law, of breaking the rules.
I asked this question yesterday.
I don't, you know, Sturdley asked me this too before.
I said, I don't know how you get a horse to masturbate in order to produce this.
There's a technique to it.
I am a certified artificial intimidation technician for dairy cows.
God.
Oh, my God.
There is a technique.
You certified in this?
What a day.
I thought they'd only know how to do this to the state of Washington, but you are in Maryland and you can figure it out, huh?
That's correct.
As liberal as this stupid state is.
What's that got to do with it?
All right.
So you think since you are a certified expert in horse masturbation.
In dairy cows.
I'm sure that the logistics are the same.
Oh, it's even worse than dairy cows.
We'll be back.
I can't do this.
Back we are here on the one and only Excellence in Broadcasting Network, El Rushbo and the rest of the staff having regained our composure here.
So we are now able to move on to Le Moyne, Pennsylvania.
This is Tom.
Welcome, sir, to the EIB Network.
Oh, mega Dittos from Vietnam Veteran and Army Retiree Rush.
I can't believe I actually got through to you.
Glad you did, and it's got to be exciting for you to follow our previous call.
Yes, I was just going to say is that just like following a Broadway hit here with a little two-person show.
Well, you know, it's not too often that you get to follow a licensed and certified masturbist.
Oh, yes.
I'll try my best.
I've been listening past couple of days to the Hillary quotes that you've given, especially the ones where she said about, I gave the authorization to the president and my vote.
Talk about arrogance.
It acts like, you know, ever since these Democrats got in power, and I use Democrats, not members of the Democrat Take Party, got in power, they act like they're God, like the president should bow to them.
Oh, exactly.
And the problem is that a lot of Republicans think the same thing.
They're urging the president to do the same thing.
That's what I was talking about.
The people spoke in 2006.
Hey, look, they have always been arrogant and condescending.
I mean, that's part of the DNA of a liberal.
Yeah.
Well, I have one message I'd like to pass on to them from a staunch Republican and a conservative, and this is coming from a Bible-believing Christian.
Get off the throne, Democrats.
God wants it back.
I wish he could help pass that on to them.
Get off the throne.
God wants it.
Well, you know, God let it happen in the first place here.
I mean, you're going to get in a big, tangled-up mess here if you start going down that road.
But speaking of the throne, you will not believe what I am holding here in my formerly nicotine-stained finger.
You will not believe this.
It is from the UK.
Toilets in one London prison are being changed in the direction in which they point to accommodate Muslim inmates who cannot use the toilets while facing Mecca.
Government officials acknowledged using tax dollars for the changes to the facilities, but maintained that moving the toilets was part of an ongoing refurbishment, according to an article in the Sun newspaper.
Islamic code prohibits Muslims from facing or turning their backs on the direction of prayer when they use the bathroom.
Muslim practitioners complained of having to sit sideways on toilets so as not to break the religious code.
Well, apparently they didn't just keep letting them sit sideways because that's not how the toilet is designed to be used.
My question is, I've just had a lot of questions here.
Of all places, a prison?
We're going to reorient the direction of a toilet because Islamic code prohibits Muslims from facing or turning their backs on the direction of prayer when they use the bathroom.
Meaning, I guess they have to turn, they can't turn their back or face Mecca when they use the bathroom.
What do they do in an airplane?
Go to the cockpit and say, I got some box cutters.
And if you don't turn this airplane 45 degrees for the next two minutes, I'm going to hijack you.
Who's next?
Amy in Woodbridge, Virginia.
I'm glad you called, Amy.
Welcome to the program.
Well, thanks, Rush.
You know, I think you really need to reconsider your stance that people exhibiting this parasocial relationships are, in fact, disordered.
I think there's, what, 11 million people who on a daily basis exhibit such a relationship toward you.
We think of you with our friend.
We plan our day around turning the radio on on time.
We sign up for 24-7 so we don't miss a word.
I think this is quite normal.
One correction, and then we'll address the substance.
It's not 11.
Oh, well, please, up it.
It's 20.
I like that better.
20 million people.
But here's the thing.
You know, I am a real person, and you are listening to a real person, and I am talking to you.
It is only natural that you in the audience would have a connection with me.
I'm trying to establish it.
And especially when members of the audience call and get through, then we actually have conversations.
I am not an actor portraying a fictional character named Rush Limbaugh, nor am I an animal that is attracting all this.
It's totally understandable here.
I will not say that any member of this audience who is rabid, loves the program, and so forth, has any kind of disorder.
Well, good, because it did sound like maybe you were lumping us into that because I've never met you.
This is the first time I've talked to you, but I've talked back to the radio with you for, oh, seven years, and you're my adult conversation.
Yes, but I'm a real person.
I'm not an actor or soap opera actor or a celebrity.
I'm a real person.
I'm attempting to establish this relationship.
Oh, but it's still so one way, I'm afraid.
Oh, no.
It's not one way.
You and I are talking, and you talk to the radio when you're not talking to me on the phone as we are now.
True.
But it's not one way.
This connection works.
I'm also, if you want to say anybody here might have a disorder, let's look at me.
What am I actually doing here?
I'm in a glass encased room.
I am sitting behind a microphone.
And I am telling myself there are 20 million people out there who are hanging on every word that I say.
If anybody has a disorder, now I have come to grips with it.
You know, I learned this very young.
You stop and think about radio people.
It's really, it's a wonder there aren't more of them that are insane than already are.
Because here's what happens.
Radio people sit in these little booths behind the microphone and they do whatever they do and they tell themselves, because they have to, that everybody in the world, everybody in the country is hanging on every word they say.
Then the show is over and they leave and they go outside the building and they find out nobody cares who they are after they've just spent three or four hours pretending they're the most important thing in people's lives.
And some of them crack up and can't deal with it.
And the way they deal with it is to continue to live the fantasy outside the studio.
And they'll say things like, if Al Gordon come on my show, he'd be president today.
When they have maybe a million and a half people watching their show.
No names necessary.
The affliction happens to too many.
I do not have this disorder because I recognized it early on when I first got out of radio after I'd been in it 12 years.
And I went to work for the Kansas City Royals and that's where I became a normal person.
And those five years allowed me to come back into radio with a much different perspective on things.
But no, there's no possibility of parasocial relationship disorder among members of this audience for me.
And let's get that straight.
And if anybody thought in the audience that I was talking about you having a disorder because of the relationship you have with this program, perish the thought.
Now, if...
Never mind.
Back.
Back in just a second.
A true what?
Oh, yeah.
We've got masturbatory conflict coming up in the next hour involving horses, ladies and gentlemen, two competing callers trying to inform us about this and other stuff, too.