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July 20, 2006 - Rush Limbaugh Program
36:45
July 20, 2006, Thursday, Hour #3
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Setting the tone, establishing the pace, setting the standard for broadcasters nationwide.
Rush Limbaugh and the one and only Excellence in Broadcasting Network coming to you today, by the way, from high atop the EIB building in Midtown Manhattan.
We'll be back at our Florida Southern Command tomorrow.
The reason I came up here, folks, is that my brother, I told you this yesterday, my brother, by the way, where did the HR, HR, timeout.
Get his attention.
Where did the girls go?
Were they eating, still eating candy?
There they are.
All right.
My brother took my three nieces, Courtney, Kristen, and Caitlin, to Washington and New York this week.
They were in Washington.
I got into New York last night, and they're going to the Lion King tonight and so forth.
And David was going to bring them by here to see the EIB Northern Command.
I wanted to bring them in to see Cookie and so forth.
And so I decided to fly up last night and surprise them.
And I pulled into Patsy's for dinner five minutes after they left.
Just missed them.
And so they got here around one o'clock and they're on the other side of the glass for a while, but Kathleen keeps feeding them cookie and hot dogs and stuff, candy and so forth, because, well, they didn't eat breakfast, right?
They didn't eat breakfast.
And of course, David is wandering around here as opposed to the streets of Cape Girardo.
And so they're on the other side of the glass.
And if you were watching the Ditto Cam a little earlier, folks, and you saw some little girls running in front of the Ditto Cam, they were being given a tour of the studio here as Kathleen was pointing out the carpet to them and some of the other interesting things here.
And they haven't been on the other side of glass for the whole hour.
And I didn't know if I scared them off.
Now, don't tell me they're in a bathroom for a whole hour.
I know they're women, but they're not going to be there for a whole hour.
I wouldn't know.
I've never been in that one bathroom.
Anyway, this is the first time they've ever been anywhere in the EIB broadcast complex.
And they don't care.
They're out eating candy.
I'm just kidding, girls.
It's a performance.
At any rate, breaking news here, ladies and gentlemen, in a blow to the drive-by sports media, Barry Bonds will not be indicted today.
Federal prosecutors said that they would not seek an indictment against Barry Bonds today, but that a grand jury investigating the baseball star for perjury and tax evasion charges would continue its work.
Now, I think this grand jury expires a week from today, and they only work on Thursdays.
Have you ever done grand jury duty?
Piece of cake.
You go in there, do what the prosecutor tells you to do, and you leave.
You do it once or twice a week.
You serve there for a year.
You don't get paid much, but nevertheless, no indictment for Barry Bonds.
And in another breaking story, Carl Rove will not be indicted today either, ladies and gentlemen.
Time to go to the audio soundbites.
By the way, we want to be on the program 800-282-2882.
Another illustration here of how I am show prep for the rest of the media.
Last night on Larry King Alive, interviewing Senator Joe Biden.
And Larry King says, is this the beginning of World War III?
No, it's not the beginning of World War III.
Actually, it may be a real opportunity to change the dynamic in the region, Larry.
This is the first time that everyone's on the same page.
Not only are the Hezbollah holding an Israeli soldiers hostage, but they're holding Lebanon hostage.
And half the Lebanese people are angry with Hezbollah.
The whole Sunni world understands this is a major gambit by Iran.
Yeah, great opportunity.
Who was it that said this on Monday?
Who was it that called this a gift to the world?
It was I who on Tuesday and Wednesday wrote, wow, this is a great opportunity.
Some of the most learned pundits and columnists who started praising themselves for agreeing with one another.
But you heard it first on this program, and now even Senator Biden echoing sentiments offered and uttered by me, but he did it Wednesday night.
Happened here on Monday.
Now, this is hilarious.
This is on the House floor.
This is last night.
And just listen to this.
This is a portion of remarks made by Harlem Congressman Charles Wrangel talking about Hezbollah.
This is the man who would be the chairman of the Ways and Means Committee were the Democrats to win back the House in this year's election.
If we do have crown princesses and kings and presidents that are able to go to the ranch and discuss whatever they do, why not take advantage of this opportunity to tell the Arab countries in the region that this is the time for all of us to come together, not just in a willing coalition, but in a coalition for peace, and to make certain that we cut this cancer out, not just because of Israel, but because of the free world.
The Hamas and the halibazoo, the Hezbollah, have to really be cut, this cancer, cut out of our society now.
The hellabazoo.
Did you hear that?
He called them the hellabazoo, and they've got to be cut out of our society now.
They're a cancer in the Hamas.
This was, I mean, his point is right.
These guys don't know it.
They're all agreeing with me.
And this is a market change because normally a guy like Wrangell would be siding with Hezbollah.
But this is the, well, Barack Osama.
Now, you ask about Barack Osama.
A couple things here about Barack Osama.
One day before President Bush, Bush addressed the NAACP for the first time during his presidency today.
And folks, I have to tell you, I was disappointed.
And I really mean, I think it was an opportunity lost.
And I, this is so difficult for me to say, but it was full of pandering.
He spoke to the group.
Now, I know it's the NAA LCP.
And I know that it's legacy time.
And I know that he's trying to build a bridge to them.
No, I don't want to shell the NAA LCP.
If you just let me finish.
But he started talking about how great the climb out of slavery has been for these people and Jesse Jackson.
And none of the people in that audience have been slaves.
And then he talked about how the Republican Party forgot him.
After Abe Lincoln, the Republican Party forgot him and didn't care about him.
And the Republican Party's done a lousy job of outreach.
Blah, He did say some great things about the No Child Left Behind Act and then getting families back in a firm foundation and so forth.
But I was hoping he would say, we got some great candidates in our party that are running this year.
Lynn Swan for governor of Pennsylvania.
Michael Steele from Maryland running for the Senate.
Ken Blackwell in Ohio running for governor there.
I was hoping to hear something like that.
And I frankly was hoping to hear a little recitation of conservative principles.
Even if he'd have been booed, even if he'd have been hissed.
Hell, he got heckled anyway.
He got heckled at the end of his remarks.
Julian Bond got out of his chair.
By the way, now this is quintessential Bush.
Julian Bond has said the most cruel, unkind, distorted, lying things about George W. Bush for years now.
First thing he did, President Bush, was thank Julian Bond, praise him for his great leadership of the NAA LCP.
That's when I knew that I was going to be disappointed with this speech.
But nevertheless, when the heckling started, Julian Bond came up and he was going to try to shut the heckling down and Bush turns and don't worry about it.
I can handle it.
I can deal with it.
It was a pretty memorable event.
But anyway, yesterday, I think, might have been this morning, I'm not sure which, but you had Barack Osama and you had Hillary Clinton and Senator Kennedy, and they all spoke to the NAA LCP convention, and they all refused to mention Bush's name.
They referred to him as the surprise guest.
They did so in a very derogatory fashion, which, of course, is expected.
But here, you know, Barack Osama, he's out there trying to cast his way into the Democrat leadership as a candidate for president down the road, as the guy of the great hope, the great future of the Democratic Party.
And Clinton and Osama and you got me saying Osama, it's Obama.
It's Barack Obama, and you've been having me say Barack Osama all these time.
Oh, Ted Kennett's right.
Ted Kennedy is Osama Barama.
Yeah, Osama Barama.
But regardless, Clinton, Obama, and others were urging the NAALCP to press Bush on the Voting Rights Act and give him trouble, to offer him some disrespect.
Obama and Hillary, literally, they stunk up the place before Bush even got there to speak to the NAACP.
Now, here's a story that you will not see in the drive-by media.
So this is by Ed Thomas, and it's a Gape or Aguppy.
I'm not sure how they pronounce it, agapepress.org.
Despite recent remarks by Illinois Senator Barack Obama urging Democrats to acknowledge the power of faith in Americans' lives and compete for the support of evangelicals and other churchgoers, some pro-family religious leaders are unconvinced of Obama's sincerity.
Bishop Harry Jackson, who's black, pastor of the Hope Christian Church in Maryland and founder and chairman of the High Impact Leadership Coalition, calls Obama's remarks political and disingenuous, referring to his speech at the Call to Renewal Conference in Washington, D.C. last month and an op-ed column in USA Today.
Jackson believes Obama and most Democrats will still see religious conservatives as narrow-minded bigots and confused in their priorities.
Well, one of the things he's probably right about here, here's Barack Obama, and he's out there telling Democrats, we must get closer to people of faith.
We must understand them.
We must show them that we relate to them.
And then he's out there doing all this stinking up the joint before Bush shows up.
Not very spiritual at all was his behavior.
Anyway, it was sort of frustrating to watch this speech in parts.
Parts of it were good, but others of it sort of were just disappointed when compared to what potential existed.
All right, I got to run here a quick timeout.
We'll be back.
Continue in mere moments.
Don't go away.
Yeah, we got some more Clinton triangulation going on, echoing the sentiments of John Kerry, who served in Vietnam.
And who else said it?
I think Hillary said this at some point, she backed away from it.
But Bill Clinton has said that if Joe Lieberman loses the Democrat primary, and he's down, he's trailing by five points.
But of course, to these people that believe in these kinds of horse race polls, it's the trend that counts.
And Lieberman was up, now he's down to this madcap single-issue clown, the media tyke.
What's his name, Ned Lamont?
Yeah.
Anyway, Clinton says, if Lieberman loses, I love the guy.
I mean, he's one of my best friends.
Great said, I didn't like what he said about me in Lowens County, Florida said it, but I understood he had to do it.
Still, I can't support him.
I have to support the nominee of our party.
So he's now saying Lieberman's toast if he loses the primary.
And Lieberman is going to run as independent, and Lieberman will win as an independent.
And it is going to be embarrassing.
It's going to shake up this whole notion of the Democrat anti-war left dominating electoral politics.
Here's Joe in Cleveland.
Joe, thanks for waiting.
Welcome to the EIB network.
Well, thank you very much for talking to me, Rush.
It's a great honor.
Thank you.
And I know that my mom who listened to Down in Dallas is going to be real proud that I even got through to you.
I can understand that.
Many people tell me that.
I have a question for you in the form of maybe a statement.
But one of the things that is amazing me is that I think for the first time in history that the Arabs have actually sided with Israel.
And unless my history is poor, it's always been their goal to wipe Israel off the face of the earth.
It's still.
And now that they have stood up, they've said that they're understanding Israel's position in this whole thing.
Well, I mean, deep in their hearts, it still is, but sudden new realities have intruded.
And the sudden new reality is called Iran.
But you're absolutely right.
The Arab majority is staying silent on this other than to condemn Hezbollah, as Charles Wrangel referred to them on the floor of the House.
And the reason is these guys are worried to death.
I'll tell you, the House of Saud, Crown Prince King Abdullah, whatever he is now, Iran's got designs in this whole region, folks.
Make no mistake about it.
They are not Arabs.
They've got designs on the oil fields, and these people understand that Hezbollah is simply an extension of Iran and that Syria has cast its deck and its lot with Iran.
Right now, that poses a greater threat to them than their hatred of the Israelis.
They don't worry about the Israelis taking over their oil fields.
They don't worry about the Israelis committing aggression on them.
They know that that's not.
They know the truth about Israel.
They hate Jews.
They're anti-Semites.
They hate Jews and they hate the fact they got Jews so close to them, even though they have them surrounded.
It's no more complicated than that.
But now you've got this guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinezad, and he's rattling all these sabers.
And like most people, they don't know if he's a lunatic or whether this is an act.
But they do know that the mullahs of Iran are dangerous and that they're aligning with the Russians and that they're aligning with the Chinese.
Believe me, all of that matters more than this little, to them, this little skirmish between Hezbollah or Hezbollah and the Israelis.
In fact, there was a piece in the New York Sun on July 17th by Yusuf Ibrahim.
And the headline of the piece is, Arab majority may not stay forever silent.
He said, yes, world, there is a silent Arab majority that believes that 17th century Islam is not fit for 21st century challenges.
That women do not have to look like walking black tents.
That men do not have to wear beards and robes, act like lunatics, and run around blowing themselves up in order to enjoy 72 virgins in paradise.
And that secular laws, not Islamic Sharia, should rule our day-to-day lives.
And yes, we, the silent Arab majority, do not believe that writers, secular or otherwise, should be killed or banned for expressing their views, or that the rest of our creative elite, from movie makers to playwrights, actors, painters, sculptors, and fashion models, should be vetted by Neanderthal Muslim Imams who have never read a book in their dim, miserable lives.
Nor do we believe that little men with head wraps and disheveled beards can run amok in Lebanon, Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Iraq making decisions on our behalf, dragging us to war whenever they please, confiscating our rights to be adults, and flogging us for not praying five times a day or even for not believing in God.
More important, we are not silent any longer.
Rarely have I seen such an uprising, indeed, an intifada against those little turbaned bearded men across the Muslim landscape as the one that took place last week.
The leader of Hezbollah, Sheikh Hassan Nasrallah, received a resounding no to pulling 350 million Arabs into a war with Israel and his clerical coattails.
The collective net was spoken by presidents, emirs, and kings at the highest level of government in Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Bahrain, Qatar, Jordan, Morocco, and at the Arab League's meeting of 22 foreign ministers in Cairo on Saturday.
But it was even louder from pundits and ordinary people.
All in all, this is the last paragraph.
All in all, it seems that when Israel decided to go to war against the priestly mafia of Hamas and Hezbollah, it opened a whole new chapter in the greater Middle East discourse.
And Israel is finding to its surprise that a vast, not-so-silent majority of Arabs agrees that enough is enough.
To be sure, beneath the hostility towards Sheikh Nasrallah in Sunni Muslim states lies the deep and bitter heritage of a 14th century Sunni-Shiite divide, propelled to greater heights now by fears of an ascendant Shiite ark of menace rising out of Iran and peddled in the Sunni world of Syria.
The sooner this is settled, the better.
This is Yusuf Ibrahim, who claims to be a mainstream Arab and that there are a majority of them who are sick and tired of being identified and associated with the Islamo-fascists that have become the face of Arabs and of Islamists.
You know what's interesting about this?
It's true.
The neighboring Arab countries have no brief for Hezbollah on this.
They're not condemning Israel.
They are condemning Hezbollah.
Even the UN today, in condemning both, that's news because normally the UN would just condemn Israel.
Well, Kofi Anan.
But in the midst of all this, and this is profound, as Joe in Cleveland mentions, it is historic.
It's the first time in anybody's recent memory that such an action has not united the Arab world.
And still, the drive-by media in this country covering the story, the drive-by media around the world still look at this through the old lens, through the old template.
Israel's guilty.
Israel's the problem.
It's disproportionate.
They don't even acknowledge or are not even aware of the historical shift represented here.
As usual, the drive-by media is so far behind the eight-ball behind the curve, they are literally clueless as to what this is all about and where it's headed.
We'll be back momentarily.
A man, a legend, a way of life.
Learn it.
Love it.
Live it.
Rushland boy, as usual, having more fun than a human being with have my brain tied behind my back using talent on loan from God all at the same time.
800-282-2882.
If you want to weigh in here, Iran, this is from the Al Jazeera Times.
Iran on Thursday, that's today promised to formally respond on August 22nd to a Western package of incentives aimed at resolving the standoff over its suspect nuclear program.
The Supreme National Security Council, Iran's top security decision-making body, also threatened that the country will reconsider its nuclear policies if sanctions are imposed.
They didn't elaborate, but Iranian officials repeatedly have suggested that Tehran may withdraw from the Nuclear Nonproliferation Treaty and stop cooperation with the UN inspect.
Well, that's a joke.
The fact that they're even a member of the Nuclear Nonproliferation Treaty and they're doing what they're doing, it's all a joke.
It is an absurd joke.
They're threatening to leave something they don't follow and abide by anyway.
Another brilliant UN production.
This council, the Supreme National Security Council of Iran, said in a statement, a package of incentives requires a logical time to study it.
August 22nd has been set for declaring our views.
I don't doubt that this means they're going to bomb anybody because I don't think that they will announce on August 22nd that they're going to actually bomb anybody.
But, you know, they're interestingly just sitting aside here while Hezbollah or Hezbollah continues to fight as their proxy.
I didn't get to this story yesterday.
In fact, I didn't get to this story a couple days ago.
It's a Gallup poll.
Four in 10 Republicans would not find John McCain an acceptable nominee.
Hillary Clinton, John Edwards, and Al Gore are the most acceptable possible Democrat nominees.
Recent Gallup panel polls asked Republicans and Democrats whether they would find each of several possible contenders for their party's 2008 presidential nomination to be acceptable nominees.
Unlike other nomination ballot questions that measure respondents' first choice from among a list of possible candidates, this question paints a broader picture of the level of potential support and opposition for each candidate.
Here's how it shaked out.
I'm sorry, shook out on the Republican side.
The most acceptable Republican candidate was Rudolph Rudy Giuliani, 73%.
25% said he was not acceptable.
And number two, a most acceptable candidate to Republicans.
Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice at 68% acceptable, 29% not acceptable.
Number three, 55% acceptable, Senator John McCain, and 41% unacceptable.
That's four in 10.
Newt Gingrich at 45 acceptable, 50 unacceptable, Jeb Bush at 4452, Frist at 3844, George Allen, 3635, Cheney, 3461, Pataki, 3351, Mitt Romney, 3142, Mike Huckabee, the governor of Arkansas, 1740, and Sam Brownbeck, the senator from Kansas, at 14 acceptable and 43 unacceptable.
Breaking news of about an hour ago was ABC announcing that the governor, Mitt Romney, Massachusetts, has closed the Ted Williams Tunnel, which integral part of Boston's big dig was going to be a big urban dream.
It just literally came collapsing down.
There are going to be criminal investigations into this.
You cannot imagine where this is headed.
Alex Milford, Delaware, welcome to the EIB Network.
Hello, sir.
Hello, how are you?
Mega Digged up.
Dittos.
Thank you, sir.
At the end of the last hour, you posed a question of not being sure when this idea of appeasement through land with our enemies or lack of will to actually fight wars began.
And I believe it started at the end of World War II when Eastern Europe was ceded to the Soviet Union.
And it carried on into Korea with Transportation.
Well, I was basically wondering about the position of the American people, because the caller was talking about the great, the greatest generation.
Which, frankly, was also an idea stolen from me.
And I've never said that, but that was, I'm the one that I'll bet you Brokaw heard my monologue on that.
I praised the World War II generation, and I'm going to stop there.
But it's because it doesn't matter.
But what I was wondering was what happened to the American people.
You look at the way the greatest generation is defined in Brokaw's book and from my monologues on them, and you find that their children have turned into wusses.
And you wonder why, what was the catalyst?
What happened?
And see, that's whether, you know, it may be that we ceded, I was not talking about how the U.S. gives land away.
I was merely referring to the attitudinal shift.
Now, I'm going to tell you one of the things I think it has to do with, and it is that we are in a generation.
Yeah, I think you have to throw the Gulf War out of this.
I mean, because it was too easy, didn't take very long.
And it really didn't erase the bugaboo of Vietnam.
We've got a generation now, maybe two, who don't remember an America victorious at war.
And I've always thought that we're going to have problems when we have presidential candidates running for office who don't remember, weren't alive, or if they were, didn't appreciate America victorious in war.
Now, I know what some of you lefties in the audience are probably saying.
What do you need to fight a war every generation just to keep it?
No.
No, but when you find yourself in one, you better damn well win it.
When you find yourself attacked, you better have the resolve and understanding of what's at stake.
And I just wonder how many Americans do.
It's a host of reasons for this.
It would be impossible to point your finger at just one and explain it.
Mark in Austin, Texas.
Hello, sir.
Listen, just a quick question.
Wondering why the media is not blaming the UN for what's been going on currently in Lebanon when the UN's been there.
And then on the flip side, they're also calling for more UN involvement.
Well, you didn't hear the beginning of the program.
Because I spent a lot of time monologuing on this near the end of the first half hour of the program, and I'm looking for the cheat sheet notes I made on it to repeat it because it is a good question, but it's sort of the it represents, I think, the absurdity of the whole existence of the UN and the way the UN is covered.
Here it is.
Listen to this, Mark, and you'll get the picture.
Because I openly speculate, I said, what is it about the UN that makes it above and beyond criticism?
It's not just in this episode.
They've got the most effective anti-missile shield on earth.
It has to be something like that.
Have you ever heard, for example, Kofi Annan called a dim bulb?
We hear George Bush called a dim bulb all the time.
We hear George Bush called Hitler George Bush's devil and evil incarnate.
We ever hear any criticism of Kofi Annan?
No.
You ever hear of the culture of corruption about the United Nations?
No.
We always hear about the Republican Party and its culture of corruption.
But we never hear about the UN, the oil food program.
Yeah, some people bring it up.
Claudia Rosetta, the Wall Street Journal, is swept into the rug, drive-by media.
Others don't want to hear about it.
The UN defines modern corruption.
A whole organization's corrupt.
If you ask me, just looking at the majority of members who themselves individually are corrupt.
And then you have the program like the Oil for Food program, which screwed average ordinary Iraqis and the UN administered the program.
And yet, we never hear the UN call to culture corruption.
Not only that, I mean, how about, do we hear the phrase bad plan associated with the UN?
Never.
We hear about Bush's bad plan in Iraq and Rumsfeld's bad plan or lack of a plan or whatever.
We never hear about every UN plan that's not only bad, they stink.
Rwanda, Sudan, Somalia, Lebanon.
You name a UN plan, and I can guarantee you it blew up and failed and was inconsequential.
You ever hear of the investigative reporting in the Congo?
No, we don't hear about the UN's failures in the Congo or their rape of young girls on the part of peacekeepers in a couple of African countries.
How does the UN do this?
How does our media let them do it?
For what?
How would it sound?
Kofi Annan is a frat boy.
Kofi Annan is a dim bulb.
Kofi Annan lied to the people.
Kofi Annan misrepresented.
Kofi Annan had a bad plan.
Kofi Annan represents big Islam.
They simply are immune to this.
And you can say that media doesn't highlight the UN and its role there and its failure there.
UN Resolution 1559, Kofi's on television today telling, you two sides, you must cease and desist.
You must cease hostilities.
Kofi, how about enforcing your own resolution, 1559?
Well, I will not resign.
No.
Well, he didn't enforce any of the UN resolutions against Saddam for over 14 years, 16, 17 resolutions.
And yet he's on television acting like they've had no role in it.
They've got all this power of influence to demand that these sides cease and desist.
It's absurd that the UN's never criticized.
Never.
Are they?
Not by mainstream types, not by drive-by types.
Not by, you know, aren't even too many elected U.S. officials that rip them.
What do you think Bolton got in trouble for?
Bolton was going to go to the UN and he said the top 10 floors aren't necessary over there.
Bolton was going to go up there and be confrontational.
Can't have that.
By the way, have you heard about the turnaround with Voinovich, Voinovich in the Washington Post?
You know what?
I'm not saying I was wrong about Bolton, but he has surprised me.
I thought he was going to go up there and be confrontational.
I thought he wouldn't be a good representative of the United States.
Turns out he has actually talked about our instructions, his instructions.
He's not gone up there and run around like a megalomaniac.
He's megalomaniac.
He's been reserved.
He's been restrained.
And I think it'd be a mistake because Bolton's recess appointment expires in September.
And the president will probably renominate him.
Senate will have to vote on it again.
And Voinovich is saying, I'm going to vote for him.
In fact, let's see if I can find the last two paragraphs.
Yes, right here in my formerly nicotine stained fingers.
Here's George Voinovich as he wraps up his piece today.
Should the president send his renomination to the Senate, I'll vote to confirm John Bolton.
And I call on my Democrat colleagues to keep in mind the current situation in the Middle East and the rest of the world should the Senate have an opportunity to vote.
I don't believe the U.S. at this dangerous time can afford to have a UN ambassador who does not have Congress's full support for the good of our country, the United Nations and a free world.
We must end any ambiguity about whether John Bolton speaks for the United States so that he can work to support our interest at the United Nations during this critical time.
This guy, Voinovich, was in tears on the Senate floor at the prospect that Bolton was going to be confirmed.
Nobody can go out there and rip the UN.
Nobody does it.
You'll stack George Bush up against Kofi Annan any day of the week, and it's not even a contest.
It's a little league versus the major leagues.
So, and don't look for this to change anytime soon.
There's something magical about the UN.
It's because they're intentions.
They're a bunch of socialists, a bunch of liberals, and they hate Israel and they don't like us.
And so it's just it hasn't changed.
It isn't going to.
Little break here, back with more right after this note.
All right, get a lot of this.
Get a lot of this.
This is from the stack from two days ago, ladies and gentlemen, from ABC News.
Hans Peter Neisward from the Department of Gravitation's Physik at the ISA in Munich says that we can stop global warming in one fell swoop, or more accurately, in one big jump.
The slightly diseveled professor states his case on worldjumpday.org, an internet site created to recruit 600 million people to jump simultaneously on July 20th at 11:39:13 GMT in an effort to shift Earth's position.
Now, this is obviously two days ago.
This is the 22nd, isn't it?
What is the date today?
I don't even have a calendar of it.
Oh, it's today.
It's today.
Okay, this is today.
Well, anyway, that's not the point of the story.
Niceward claims that on this day, today, Earth occupies one of the most fragile positions in its orbits for the last 100 years.
According to the site, the shift in orbit will stop global warming, extend daytime hours, and create a more homogenous climate.
Okay, following this so far, we've got this guy who's a scientist who wants to recruit 600 million people, too late now because of time's past, 600 million people to jump, same time to change the Earth's orbit to stop global warming.
This is an ABC news story that gets even better.
Niceward's theory has at least one major flaw.
He doesn't really exist.
He is a character created by Torsten Lochman, a German-born artist living in Scotland.
Laughsman, a live performer, a filmmaker, a DJ, and a photographer, may be best known for his work, Misshapen Pearl, described as a phenomenological investigation of the street lamp's function in our consumers to start.
ABC is doing a story on a lunatic involving global warming who is misrepresenting himself as a scientist.
In 2005, last year, for those of you in Rio Linda, Lochsman encouraged scientists and bloggers from around the world to discuss World Jump Day.
But ABC, as a credible news organization, had to go out and find critics.
Members of the online environmental site Treehugger.com have been debating not only the physical possibility of the jump's promise, but the morality of its outcome.
Some of the anti-jumpers believe it is risky to alter Earth's orbit.
While others fear the jump will make the Gregorian calendar obsolete because of the length of Earth's new orbit, others doubt the ability of the world's population to synchronize an event like this.
One word of caution: the site tells those of us living in the eastern part of the U.S. to jump at 6:39.13 because we are five hours behind GMT, but that's not true in July because of daylight savings time.
Lawschman has part of the U.S. jumping an hour early.
All right.
This is a story.
ABC is a major American network with a serious news division.
And they think it is newsworthy that a fraud, an artist portraying himself as a scientist, comes up with this Looney Toons idea to have 600 million people jump at the same time.
They screws up the time for people in the United States.
And then they go out and they actually find people.
Seriously studying a proposal.
Well, it might be dangerous, risky to alter the Earth's orbit.
Though we could.
We don't have a chance.
We don't have a chance for reasonable debate on global warming when this kind of idiocy actually makes it as a serious news story.
Exactly.
We started with idiots today.
We had idiots throughout the middle of the program, and we have ended with idiots, all of them brought to us by the drive-by media.
Back in a second.
Men eating more candy out there, girls?
Yeah, I can tell with a smile on their face.
Well, that's it, folks.
Another exciting excursion into broadcast excellence in the can.
This one not only headed to the Limbaugh Museum, this one headed for the Broadcast Hall of Fame.
See you from the EIB Southern Command, Manana.
A little immigration lingo there.
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