A working man. A man who works… to free his boss’ daughter from the clutches of a human trafficking ring. Gabrus joins Jake and Julian as we attempt to make sense of this very puzzling film starring Jason Statham and co-written by none other than Sylvestor Stallone. They’ve come together to make an awful mess, complete with mobsters straight out of Grand Theft Auto and the Russian bad guy equivalent of Beebop and Rocksteady. Gabrus also talks about his experience seeing the film in 4D.
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Gabrus: https://x.com/Gabrus
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Staying Alive: https://www.siriusxm.com/player/show-podcast/entity/593bdc12-99c0-3430-9afb-9a9e274419df?utm_medium=shared
Editing by Corey Klotz. Theme by Nick Sena. Additional music by Jake Rockatansky. Theme Vocals by THEY/LIVE (https://instagram.com/theyylivve / https://sptfy.com/QrDm). Cover Art by Pedro Correa: (https://pedrocorrea.com)
https://qaapodcast.com
QAA was known as the QAnon Anonymous podcast.
Welcome to the QAA Podcast Premium Episode 287, A Working Man Movie Night.
As always, we are your hosts, Jake Rokitansky, Julian Field, John Gabrus, and no Travis View, as requested by me.
I thank you very much for kicking him out.
John said, oh, come on.
Get that guy out of here.
I just got to say, real quick, it was so exciting to say my name as one of the hosts.
I listen every week, and I'm very pumped to get to say.
I mean, absolutely, absolutely, because here's the thing.
I listen to a lot of podcasts, and they have great guests on, and sometimes they make the guests just kind of linger in the shadows for kind of an uncomfortable amount of time before they eventually turn, and I was like, Like, not my boy.
I can't do him like that.
Not on this Jason Statham beautiful movie night.
Thank you.
Thank you.
And I feel so welcome.
Continue with your spiel.
I'm sorry I interrupted.
All right.
I got a little bit of a spiel.
It all began a couple weeks ago when my partner and I went to see Mickey 17. We arrived early to the theater and didn't feel like hanging out in our seats for 45 minutes.
So instead...
We hung out on the theater terrace doing bits and bobs and wondered out loud where the guys with the backpacks could all their little light-up whirly-pops that they were throwing.
How old are you?
Whirly pops that they were throwing high into the air.
What the fuck is going on?
Bits and...
You were doing bits and bobs?
Bits and bobs!
We do, like, little bits, you know?
You wondered about the light-up whirly pops?
Yeah, the things that the guys throw.
Are you okay, man?
Are you sundowning?
I can't believe I said, do your spiel.
I didn't know this was the spiel.
Jesus.
My spiels have become, like, more unhinged recently.
And I'm like, it feels better.
You know, in this new era, to try to kind of button it up and...
Contain my insanity.
It just, like, doesn't feel right.
Doesn't sit well with me, so.
You're, like, somehow the American version of British people who say, like, I was faffing about.
It's, like, just, there's something bizarre.
And also unique.
Like, I can't place where any of this language comes from.
The closest I can imagine is, like, yeah, like an orphan with a transatlantic accent.
You know what it is?
You know what it really is?
It's, like, little brother gibberish.
It's, like, shit that my brother and I would, like, make up in the backseat of a car.
On car trips and stuff that would drive my parents absolutely nuts.
It would just be the two of us, because we're only like two years apart, so it would just be the two of us back there going biggity-boggity-hippity-hoppity-dippity-doppity-doppity-dill.
Until my parents blew their tops.
We used to sing, truck drivers got big hairy balls to the, truck drivers got big hairy balls!
And it would make my parents go fucking ape shit.
They're getting so much trouble.
Truck driver!
Truck driver!
I can't believe you guys had the hoots but to go that hard.
We were feeling guilty just doing the hibbity-bobbity-boo and stuff.
No, we were trash.
I mean, we are.
I guess I can't say we're.
So we're out there on the terrace doing bits and bobs, and something caught my eye.
A massive, massive banner.
Don't say it again.
Don't say it again.
A massive, massive banner for a new Jason Statham movie.
Wow, we got another QAnon movie.
A working man.
Jason Statham, a blue-collar guy.
But look.
Human traffickers, beware!
This is a movie not friendly to human traffickers.
And look, it's right above Slice House.
But Tony Gamiani!
So, I mean, the closest I can come to, like, describing, like, the first thought that then would later be born as this movie is just Sylvester Stallone, his brain half-working, just, like, kind of muttering to himself, we gotta save the kids!
We gotta save the kids!
We gotta save the kids!
This is the most co-written by Sylvester Stallone movie that's ever existed, yeah.
Dumb guy brain is just so dominant in this movie, and I love it.
And I've got a crazy take about this, which will...
We'll get to towards the end.
But you're not wrong.
He is working class, and we will see a lot of that.
Yeah.
The title of the film.
Now, we did go to Slice House by Tony Gagamani afterwards, and the pizza was excellent.
We've since been back.
Don't advertise.
Okay.
So naturally, when I was trying to think of a movie night for this week's episode, I wanted initially to torture myself with A24's Warfare, another Alex Garland movie where I knew I would leave the film traumatized and angry, which always makes for great Jake content.
But then, Julian pointed out that there was really no conspiracy angle, and the film seemed to be just straight up a slice-of-war type movie.
I mean, the movie just looks so boring.
It's like, Civil War already was very boring.
I didn't get the trauma.
If I had gotten a little...
If I had a little bit of trauma, I would have been like, cool.
Let's see another one.
You wanted the trauma.
One for trauma, please.
Garland doesn't have what it takes to bother me.
He's just boring.
Damn.
Wow.
Strong words.
So anyway, Julian had asked, What about that Statham movie?
Of course.
How could I have forgotten the giant banner reading, quote, Human Traffickers Beware, situated directly above Tony Gigamani's Slicehouse.
No, don't.
And also, you're mispronouncing Gemignani.
Yeah.
This is racist against Italians, and I won't stand for it.
Yeah, what the fuck, bro?
I was worried that I would have to make a trip to the theater to watch what I assumed was going to be a heaping pile of garbage.
But to my good fortune, a working man was already available on streaming.
That, however, did not stop our beloved guest.
You know him from High and Mighty.
You know him from the Action Boys.
You've heard him on Improv for Humans, and you will hear him on his upcoming show, Staying Alive, John Gabrus, from Seeing a Working Man in the Theater.
In 4D.
Yeah.
You texted me about this and I said, I can't believe I'm going to re-watch this piece of shit.
I know.
That surprised you, me using the word re-watch.
What do you mean 4D?
Does it emit the smell of Statham's sweat?
You have to be on a construction site hammering rebar in while the movie plays.
No, it's Regal's proprietary invention 4DX, which is the kind that rumbles your...
It's like a little bit of like a...
Oh my god, man.
It's awful.
What kind of rumble are we talking about?
Is it like a seven?
Is it a four?
It's between a four and a six.
They titrate it depending on what's happening in the movie.
There's air bursts when there's gunshots.
No.
There's water that sprays you and it kind of hits you in the back.
So that scene where Statham is just jacking off violently and just coming?
Do they spray you?
Well, I have an add-on because I'm a Regal 3D member.
I have a little pocket pussy that I can plug in, and it'll just do whatever's happening.
It's a haptic suck suit, and it works perfectly.
I don't think you understand.
There's a scene in which Jason Statham is jacking himself off.
Explain to me the configuration that makes your pocket pussy match that scene.
We're never going to get John out by 820, by the way.
Why would we?
I want to hear more about this invention.
He seems to have a pocket pussy that somehow makes...
That's you, Jason Statham.
And then I'm thinking, wouldn't it be like the simulation of a hand?
None of this makes sense.
No, you know, it's all approximations.
They can't do it as it squirts water.
It moves you around.
And I've only used it.
I've only gone to 40X once or twice.
It usually is to plus up a bad movie, which was my intention with this.
Yeah.
My wife hates it because you can't fall asleep during a bad movie because it just keeps moving you around.
So it's not as relaxing as you would think.
And then in this one, the most specific thing that stressed me out was I got the rumble seat when that bad guy slaps his wife.
I'm like, they gave me a 40x experience of domestic abuse.
I turned to the guy I was with, I'm like, did I just get rattled when a dude slapped his wife?
He's like, yeah, the working man.
We're in it now.
So that must have been the abuser were the people whose chairs didn't rumble.
No, everyone's chairs rumble.
I sat in the abuser's chair.
Yeah, it was only the abusers in the cinema.
Yeah, that's interesting, though, that that happened to you.
You've been listening to a sample of a premium episode of the QAA Podcast.
For access to the full episode, as well as all past premium episodes and all of our podcast miniseries, go to patreon.com slash QAA.
Travis, why is that such a good deal?
Well, Jake, you get hundreds of additional episodes of the QAA Podcast for just $5 per month.
For that very low price, you get access to over 200 premium episodes, plus all of our miniseries.
That includes 10 episodes of Man Clan with Julian and Annie, 10 episodes of Perverts with Julian and Liv, 10 episodes of The Spectral Voyager with Jake and Brad, plus 20 episodes of Trickle Down with me.
Travis, for once, I agree with you.
And I also agree that people could subscribe by going to patreon.com slash QAA.