Confessions of a Bobby Kennedy (Premium E255) Sample
The corpse of a bear cub dumped in central park, a dog on a spit, brain worms and allegations of sexual assault. RFK Jr is the third-party presidential candidate we deserve. We explore his various escapades and Jake honors the moment with a beautiful story involving Roseanne Barr, RFK Jr and time travel.
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QAA was known as the QAnon Anonymous podcast.
a little bit of a break. I'm going to be back in a few minutes. So we're going to be talking
about a few things. So let's get started.
So, let's get started.
Bye.
If you're hearing this, well done.
You found a way to connect to the internet.
Welcome to the QAA Podcast, Premium Episode 255, Confessions of a Bobby Kennedy.
As always, we're your hosts, Jake Brokatansky, Julian Fields, Blair Vakar, and Travis View.
Years ago, the QA podcast began as an examination of the marginal and bizarre.
We thought of ourselves as dumpster divers, burrowing ever deeper into the cultural trash heap to bring you the most rotten items we could find, in the hopes that they would be of some interest in a broader cultural investigation.
What is that smell?
And where is it coming from?
But every time we came up for air, we noticed the landscape changing.
Blue rings of mold seemed to be forming on everything the eye could see.
And so, it came to be that we no longer bothered with our hazmat suits, because there was no world to return to.
Everywhere was the dumpster, and the bizarre became the anodyne.
It's hard to find a more perfect example of this than R.F.K.
Jr., a political scion of perhaps the most famous American family, a candidate for the presidency, and yes, an anti-vaxxer and New Age kook who believes COVID is a bioweapon created to target specific races, Wi-Fi causes quote-unquote leaky brain and cancer, and chemicals in the water supply are turning children transgender.
R.F.K.
Jr.' 's campaign for president has had another fascinating effect.
Oppo research and media scrutiny have been turning up a string of unsettling stories about the man, each more outlandish and bizarre than the last.
So today we thought we'd take our beautiful listeners on a little tour of Bobby Kennedy Jr.' 's incredible life experiences, which involve a brain worm, a dead bear cub dumped in Central Park, a dog on a spit, and allegations of sexual assault.
Oh, this man will be getting a Jake story at the end of the show.
The idea for this episode began with a video posted by RFK Jr.
himself on X, Elon Musk's increasingly unhinged iteration of a platform once known as Twitter.
The post read, In the video, RFK Jr.
is sitting in what appears to be a living room as he tells a story to, for some reason, Roseanne Barr, who was the first celebrity to endorse QAnon and has been active in right-wing kook circles since then.
She was recently captured on video at a political fundraiser at Mar-a-Lago, clutching a glass of white wine and talking to, presumably, the either Zoomer or Millennial content creator.
Hey old Ro!
How are you doing?
I'm here at Mar-a-Lago supporting Carrie Lake and it was a fantastic evening and our Trump is here being the DJ and I've just danced and everyone's amazed.
So I'm just going to say to you please drop out of college because it's going to ruin your lives.
Do me a favor.
Drop out.
They don't teach you nothing good.
Email me or Twitter me or whatever you call me and I'll help you with your life but you've got to get out of college because it isn't nothing but devil worshipping, baby blood drinking, Democrat donors.
Love ya!
God, this feels like being cornered by your least favorite aunt at a family gathering.
She has a genuinely vacant look in her eyes.
It's just bizarre.
She's talking past you.
It's the Democratic donors that are in control, specifically.
Yeah, that's the colleges, baby blood, and she's like telling people, drop out of college.
Instead of going to college, just email or like DM me.
I'll give you life advice.
Whatever you call me, she said.
And she's saying this as she's standing in front of this bizarre painting of, it looks like an Italian Renaissance painting of Trump in like a golf sweater.
She says our Trump has been DJing.
I was dancing like she's I don't know what's happening.
I do know that like taking advice from her would be amazing because she's gone from huge celebrity visible to all beloved all these TV shows to like the drunkest weirdest person.
Like that you want to avoid at all costs, even if you probably liked her before.
So if you want advice on that, like on how to completely demote your life, like if you're at the top, hit her up, because she will help you tumble right back down.
I imagine even if you're at the same fundraiser and believe the same things she does, you would want to try to avoid her.
Absolutely.
Anyways, back to RFK Jr.' 's living room.
I have no idea how Roseanne Barr ended up there.
I assume she just drunkenly wanders from party to party like those acid burnouts I would see at every single rave, like investigating the atmosphere through a mirror they had attached to their head.
But anyways, she's seen sipping from a mug labeled coffee.
Now, no comment on labeling a mug coffee and not having it be see-through.
And she's looking alternately enthralled and confused by RFK Jr.' 's long story.
Meanwhile, the presidential candidate seems less than excited to have to tell it.
He's sitting in a chair, arms crossed, in a position I'd describe as little boy cornered by teacher.
It's clear that he's only making the video to get ahead of a media investigation he's been made aware of, and he probably knows that that media investigation is going to lead to a piece that is not good for him.
In fact, he mentions that a bit later.
But it could nonetheless be a relatable moment for the average American watching the video.
After all, whom among us hasn't done something stupid they later regretted?
Maybe Kennedy's story will paint him as a fumbling, relatable everyman.
Let's take a listen.
I was taking a group of people falconing up in Goshen, New York up in Hudson Valley.
Okay, falconing!
You're amongst us.
Hasn't that been some falconing?
That's a very bad start, I think it's fair to say.
Lots of Americans are outdoorsy types who've hunted, or at the very least don't look down on the practice.
But I'm going to venture a guess that very few of them have been falconing, which involves you and your boys taking out your trained raptors to hunt small game.
A quick visit to the North American Falconers Association, or NAFA, website will tell you that this shit is for rich people only.
In the What is Falconry section, NAFA actively tries to discourage people from just jumping into the sport, asking the reader, do you REALLY want to become a falconer?
With like, really in italics and underlined.
Honestly, it does sound pretty fucking cool.
So I understand why they have to, I'm sure they have to just dissuade a bunch of bozos who are like, I want a fucking bird.
Okay.
Hunts for me.
Note to self, we must pay Liv less.
She's considering getting a falcon.
I'm saving up for a bird, for a falcon.
Yeah.
I'm this close.
I think it's like, they call it falconing, but I think it's like with hawks because he switches, he says hawking later.
Anyways, Travis, did you have any comment?
I mean, feels like you're kind of our go-to outdoorsy guy.
Yeah, you know, it is very funny that he does feel very put upon and resigned to, I guess, yet again talk about the horrors I committed while I was out falconing.
The website lists all of the things required to become a falconer, including two years of training to become an apprentice, five more to become a master, having access to land with Wild Game, and of course, just a category that just lists money.
And it explains... Most people immediately think of the cost of acquiring a hawk.
But the price of the bird is only the beginning, assuming you can purchase one.
In North America, most apprentice falconers will be required by their sponsor to trap at least their first bird from the wild.
You must have money to spend.
Spend on food, shelter, equipment, veterinary costs, permits and fees, and travel.
To keep it healthy, you must feed your raptor only fresh raw meat, preferably the exact same whole birds or mammals they would catch in the wild on their own.
Housing and equipment requirements are mandated by state and federal law.
You will need the money to buy the raw materials, and you will need the skill to work with these materials, and you will be inspected before you are permitted to acquire a hawk by state and possibly local officials.
Most falconers also spend considerable amounts of money on books as a source of vital information and enjoyment.
You will have to pay permit and license fees as well.
Travel adds up fast, too.
Obtaining a hawk, visiting other falconers, training and hunting can put literally thousands of miles on your car and empty wallets quickly.
Well, I'm out.
Honestly, I'm more interested in it now.
You have to go, like, catch a falcon.
This kind of sounds like a journey.
Yeah, it is.
It's a quest.
The moment they said I had to go capture my own bird, I was like, eh, I probably can't do this.
Can you imagine if every pet you wanted to have, you had to go out and catch it?
Be like, oh, I got to go find where the wild papillons roam.
I mean, Liv just wants to get a falcon so it can defend her against the small dogs that keep snapping her ankles.
Listen.
She would be the cause of like the death of most people's pets in the surrounding three to four kilometers.
They're strong birds.
Yeah, do not get in the way.
You just have it on your shoulder.
Feeding it fucking vive ants.
It's fucking jittering.
It's just pecking at everybody.
You've been listening to a sample of a premium episode of the QAA Podcast.
For access to the full episode, as well as all past premium episodes and all of our podcast miniseries, go to patreon.com slash QAA.
Travis, why is that such a good deal?
Well, Jake, you get hundreds of additional episodes of the QAA Podcast for just $5 per month.
For that very low price, you get access to over 200 premium episodes, plus all of our miniseries.
That includes 10 episodes of Man Clan with Julian and Annie, 10 episodes of Pervers with Julian and Liv, 10 episodes of The Spectral Voyager with Jake and Brad, plus 20 episodes of Trickle Down with me, Travis View.
It's a bounty of content and the best deal in podcasting.
Travis, for once, I agree with you.
And I also agree that people could subscribe by going to patreon.com slash QAA.