We got him. Travis attempts to recount this movie's plot to us, and a meltdown ensues. Pure silly fun. ↓↓↓↓ SUBSCRIBE FOR $5 A MONTH SO YOU DON'T MISS THE SECOND WEEKLY EPISODE ↓↓↓↓ www.patreon.com/QAnonAnonymous Merch: http://merch.qanonanonymous.com Music by Pontus Berghe (www.mixcloud.com/ChapelOne)
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| No, I can feel this movie making me dumber. | |
| Just the clips. | |
| Oh, you misunderstood John Cage of movie making here. | |
| This is why my notes have so many swears in them. | |
| I usually don't include the word shit a lot when writing about something I'm researching. | |
| I did in this case. | |
| The film goes on to explain that the reason that there are alien abductions is because the government actually signed an agreement that allowed for abductions. | |
| Then we get into the... They licensed? | |
| Yeah, they said, oh yeah. | |
| Limited abductions. | |
| We got a quota? | |
| Yeah. | |
| Then we get into the cover-up stuff. | |
| So the narrator says that Phil Schneider, the alien whistleblower so-called, was brutally murdered for exposing government secrets. | |
| True. | |
| Less than six months after giving his talk, he was found dead in his apartment with piano wires still wrapped around his neck in what appears to be a military-style execution. | |
| According to some sources, he had been brutally tortured repeatedly before being killed. | |
| The authorities dismissed the death as a suicide. | |
| Oh my god. | |
| Yeah, we're stock footage of what's supposed to be a bloody hand. | |
| But it looks like a student film about trying to do some horror stuff. | |
| Also, the funny thing is that if you actually read into the supposed lore about Phil Schneider There's actually kind of interesting stuff there, like his hand was deformed, which he claimed was from an alien ray, and so he couldn't have, you know, hung himself or wrapped the piano right around his neck because he had a disability that would prevent him from doing so. | |
| He doesn't include any of the interesting stuff, even. | |
| No, no. | |
| There's no time for explaining. | |
| But was he tortured? | |
| What'd he say? | |
| Some people say this. | |
| Move it on. | |
| No, it's like, he's got a crammed, like, I've read a lot about Phil Schneider. | |
| into an hour. Was he tortured and murdered then with piano wire? Oh because they think | |
| he was at you. He wasn't. I tried to find out. There's also a lot of research by the | |
| way. Oh really? It was hard to look into this stuff. I've read a lot about Phil Schneider. | |
| Never in any of my readings have I heard that he was tortured or found bound in shackles | |
| like it shows in the thing. | |
| Yeah, I didn't find any of that either. | |
| In fact, I also found that there's some Some people claim that there wasn't piano wire, but was actually surgical tubing around his neck. | |
| But it's just Randos claiming that as well? | |
| You couldn't find it? | |
| It's impossible, right? | |
| No, I tried to dig as far as I could. | |
| Some people claim that there's not readily available records. | |
| I would have to make a FOIA request. | |
| This is more difficult to acquire. | |
| Well, which just proves the conspiracy, I guess. | |
| But there's no reliable information. | |
| A lot of this stuff is very convincing to me in this documentary. | |
| I gotta say. | |
| This is awful. | |
| I hate myself for having to be a part of this. | |
| So the video goes on to explain how the agreement with the aliens worked for abductions. | |
| But those sneaky aliens, they broke the deal. | |
| The original terms for this treaty were that only a small number of humans could be abducted. | |
| They had to be returned to their original locations. | |
| Their memories had to be wiped. | |
| And the aliens were supposed to submit a list of the individuals they were taking to Majestic 12. | |
| However, after a few years of this, it became clear that the aliens were taking far more humans than they had originally bargained for, which spawned the origins of the alien-human conflict that persists to this day. | |
| Oh my goodness, oh god. | |
| They have taken stock footage from other shitty alien movies. | |
| I recognize some of this shit from other shitty ancient alien movies I've seen. | |
| Oh my goodness. | |
| They also, to show you the different races of aliens, it is literally like children's figurines lined up against a wall, like a cheap photo. | |
| Now this might be one of the few things that the director actually produced. | |
| I don't know. | |
| I don't even know. | |
| Maybe he might have stolen it. | |
| JPEG artifacts. | |
| There's JPEG artifacts. | |
| You can't... That's not a... That's a downloaded file. | |
| It's so bad. | |
| It looks so bad. | |
| It looks so bad. | |
| You know what's going to happen is our poor listeners are going to actually watch this shit. | |
| I know. | |
| And just experience this pain. | |
| We should get some emojis. | |
| We should get some Discord emojis from this movie. | |
| No, this is not a joke. | |
| If you can make it through an hour of this, you're a real listener. | |
| If you're not, drop your Patreon subscription because you can't handle the heat. | |
| You can't roll with the boys. | |
| Don't do it. | |
| You can't roll. | |
| I'm pretty sure that I'm pretty sure that the scene we just saw earlier to where the alien is like sneaking into the house I'm pretty sure is ripped from like some sort of like commercial where they have like an alien dancing like it actually looks like the video is of an alien dancing but he's moved the footage across like a space to make it look like they're like moving somewhere the alien is moving with very light legs kind of like the horny like Looney Tunes leg yeah where he's you know coming through the it looks like He's doing the dance. | |
| Yeah, he's doing a little flappy leg dance that he's doing the can-can. | |
| We also learn in the movie that an alien has been working at the Pentagon since 1943. | |
| Again, no details for this claim, no sources, no specifics, no evidence. | |
| It just makes a wild allegation and just carries on. | |
| Carries on. | |
| Perfect movie. | |
| Great. | |
| And because there's apparently a need to just cram every single conspiracy theory in an hour, the narrator goes on to explain that the aliens like adrenochrome. | |
| Snyder goes on to explain that at least nine races of alien beings regard humans as a food source. | |
| They are not all cannibalistic. | |
| However, they use the glandular secretions of animals and humans for mixtures of the vitamins of their food and can actually get high from our adrenaline. | |
| This is why there are so many reports of cruel... Alright, cut it! | |
| Cut it! | |
| Cut it! | |
| Oh my god. | |
| It's a silhouette screaming. | |
| It's a silhouette screaming into what though? | |
| Like a vortex? | |
| Into some other footage. | |
| What's the thing? | |
| What is the shot that's laid behind that vortex? | |
| It's laid behind the silhouette. | |
| I gotta know. | |
| I've never seen Travis like this. | |
| Travis has done a full jake. | |
| He's crying. | |
| He's fucking weeping. | |
| His face is red. | |
| He's weeping. | |
| He fucking jaked! | |
| We jaked him! | |
| We did it baby! | |
| Woo! | |
| Take a fucking bow, everybody! | |
| We Jake Travis View! | |
| You found it. | |
| You found the key. | |
| I knew it! | |
| The keystone. | |
| Wow. | |
| Oh, he's weeping. | |
| is a psychedelic nightmare. | |
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| Thank you. | |
| Thanks. | |
| I love you. | |
| Jake loves you. |