Pearly Things - Pearl Davis - How The Fittness Industry Keeps Women Broke and Fat with Amanda Dobler
Aired: 2026-03-10
Duration: 01:13:41


=== Calories Over the Week (15:07) ===

[00:00:02]  What is up, guys?
[00:00:04]  Welcome to another episode of Pearl Daily here on the Audacity Network.
[00:00:09]  How's it going?
[00:00:11]  You know, how's it going?
[00:00:14]  Thanks for thanks for being here, everybody.
[00:00:20]  Guys, guess what?
[00:00:21]  I did stand-up yesterday.
[00:00:23]  I did it.
[00:00:24]  I got over my fear of stage fright and I did it.
[00:00:27]  I was very excited.
[00:00:30]  I was, I was very excited to do stand-up.
[00:00:34]  So it was pretty, pretty exciting.
[00:00:37]  So today we actually have a special guest on the channel.
[00:00:40]  I've been watching her stuff forever.
[00:00:42]  I don't see bass women often.
[00:00:44]  It's like kind of rare.
[00:00:45]  You know what I mean?
[00:00:48]  And I've been watching this girl on Instagram who's actually giving me a ton of like tips that I've used over the years.
[00:00:53]  Her name is Amanda Dobler.
[00:00:56]  And she's, she basically helped women lose the last 20 pounds.
[00:01:03]  So I decided I was going to bring her on and she could kind of tell her story.
[00:01:07]  And yeah, we could say hi.
[00:01:08]  Welcome to the show, Amanda.
[00:01:11]  How are you?
[00:01:13]  I'm good.
[00:01:14]  How are you?
[00:01:15]  I am so good.
[00:01:16]  Excited to be here.
[00:01:18]  Did I say your last name right?
[00:01:20]  I was saying.
[00:01:22]  Well, I'm married now.
[00:01:23]  I have to change it.
[00:01:24]  It should be Donnie Cute, but I have not done that over the past year and a half.
[00:01:27]  But yes.
[00:01:29]  So how long have you been a fat loss coach?
[00:01:31]  And could you tell them what you were telling me about how you got into helping women lose weight?
[00:01:36]  Yeah, totally.
[00:01:37]  So I've been coaching for the past seven years.
[00:01:41]  And I started coaching after going through my own little weight loss journey.
[00:01:44]  I was like, I always say I was never obese.
[00:01:46]  I was never that overweight, given like the American standard, I would say, but I was 20 pounds heavier.
[00:01:53]  Going to that.
[00:01:54]  I was 20 pounds heavier.
[00:01:55]  I was breaking out.
[00:01:56]  I was like binge eating, yo-yo dieting, just like everything, every type of like bad thing that you could do, I was doing.
[00:02:03]  And so anyway, I realized enough was enough.
[00:02:06]  And I started focusing on my habits, my behavior, like the really boring things that people don't actually like doing to lose weight.
[00:02:13]  And then I lost the weight and I've kept it off.
[00:02:14]  And like, that's what I help my clients do, just like get rid of the fluff, get, well, the fluff on your body, but the fluff with like all of the info that's out there and just cut through the BS and lose the weight and change your life, as you know.
[00:02:27]  Yeah.
[00:02:27]  And so could you tell me what were some of the things that kept you overweight?
[00:02:31]  And what are some of the things you like the trends you see in American women?
[00:02:34]  Yeah.
[00:02:35]  And I'd also like to say, why is it when you're chubby, we can't just admit we're fat?
[00:02:40]  I always like to.
[00:02:41]  Fat is a bad word.
[00:02:42]  I've been banned a few times for using that word on some platforms.
[00:02:46]  So I don't know.
[00:02:47]  Maybe one day they'll accept it.
[00:02:48]  But what kept me overweight, I mean, there's so much that goes into like the best food, the best diet, the best supplement, the best, all of that.
[00:02:57]  The fact that I would not eat sandwiches because sandwiches I thought would make me fat because bread is bad, right?
[00:03:03]  But then when I would eat the sandwiches, I would binge it, which is a crazy thing to binge.
[00:03:07]  I would do that with cereal, with granola, with like chips, with anything bad.
[00:03:11]  And so, as I said, like it's your behavior.
[00:03:13]  So, what kept me overweight, and again, 20 pounds overweight.
[00:03:16]  I'm five foot seven, I was 145 pounds.
[00:03:19]  Like, no one considers that overweight because people love talking about numbers, but I just was uncomfortable, I was pudgier, I didn't look as good.
[00:03:25]  And so, just the fact that, hey, I'm going to restrict this food, but then every time I eat it, I'm going to eat 50 sandwiches at a time, like that's not good.
[00:03:33]  And so, having to fix that habit, um, learn how to eat the food like a normal person and drop the weight was key.
[00:03:41]  And so, like, with people in America, with people all over, especially women, they focus so much on removing the food, like getting the food out of the house, not drinking, right?
[00:03:52]  And I don't care about drinking, but like, not doing the things that they want to do, and then they lose the weight.
[00:03:56]  But then, how do we actually bring that back into your life and still keep the weight off?
[00:04:01]  You don't, that's why you always regain it.
[00:04:03]  And, like, that's true.
[00:04:04]  And I was telling you, I think fat loss coaches have to be able to keep it off for a certain amount of time.
[00:04:10]  Yeah, because so many just like they're working out half the day.
[00:04:14]  Of course, you're gonna be, of course, you're gonna be thin if you dedicate four hours a day.
[00:04:19]  Like, yeah, you know, working in a day, also, like, what not which sets me apart, but like, I travel, I go out to eat, I drink.
[00:04:27]  Like, I'm not glued to, well, I am glued to my phone, but I haven't opened up my fitness pal in years.
[00:04:32]  I don't track calories, I don't pay attention to that.
[00:04:34]  It's literally just being able to not just lose the weight, but keep it off with like living a normal life.
[00:04:39]  And like, everyone has their own life with how they do things.
[00:04:42]  But, like, that's my focus.
[00:04:44]  It's a lifestyle, not just hey, dieting with this.
[00:04:48]  So, from my experience, and I do TikTok reactions a lot, so I react to the what I eat in a days like all the time.
[00:04:56]  And I want to see if my observations are similar to yours.
[00:05:00]  Yeah.
[00:05:00]  Um, it seems like it's liquid calories and condiments that keep women fat, in particular, Starbucks.
[00:05:07]  Yeah, friends have you noticed?
[00:05:11]  Well, with well, first, my take with like what I eat in a day, no one tells the full story at all.
[00:05:17]  Like, I think that my videos are pointless.
[00:05:20]  I don't post what I eat in these days.
[00:05:22]  That's so true.
[00:05:24]  You're social media, you're curating the best of the best.
[00:05:27]  And so, when I see, and like, I get sucked into watching them too, like, they can be like fun to see, but it tells you nothing.
[00:05:34]  People save that and they're like, Oh, this girl is thin.
[00:05:37]  Let me follow her what I eat in a day.
[00:05:39]  No, you have a million of those saved that doesn't tell you anything and it does not tell the full picture.
[00:05:44]  There are so many people who like eat that on camera, and then they're like binging behind the scenes.
[00:05:48]  So the, what I eat in a day is it's like, yeah, let's make the most beautiful plate, which just is not the thing.
[00:05:53]  But in terms of, oh, I react to it from fat women, actually.
[00:05:58]  Well, that is that.
[00:06:02]  And I'm like, yeah, of course you're overweight.
[00:06:06]  Of course, you're eating, you're having a thousand calories before the sun comes up in your Starbucks order or Donkey Donuts order.
[00:06:12]  Like, that's no, that's no good.
[00:06:14]  Like, whenever I walk into the, we have a Starbucks near us and see people's orders of like, and I don't care, but like when there's so much crap on top of it, I'm guessing that the person grabbing that drink is overweight.
[00:06:26]  Not trying to be mean, but like, you just, you don't need that.
[00:06:29]  It's thousands of calories that go into something you're sipping that like you don't even get full from.
[00:06:34]  You just get, it doesn't, doesn't do anything for you.
[00:06:38]  So the trends with that, I don't know, people are so on top of like eating air now and not really having anything.
[00:06:45]  And so I think that there's a, I mean, I don't know.
[00:06:48]  My, my take with like coffee drinks is, do you really need to spend 400 calories on the coffee drink?
[00:06:53]  I think you mentioned that like you, you used to, right?
[00:06:56]  I would have two a day.
[00:06:57]  I would have two caramel lattes, 40 grams of sugar each.
[00:07:02]  Like I think 250 to 300 calories.
[00:07:04]  That's a meal.
[00:07:06]  That's a lot.
[00:07:07]  Yeah.
[00:07:07]  It's a meal that feels like air.
[00:07:10]  And in my head, I was like, I just said two coffees.
[00:07:13]  Yeah.
[00:07:14]  No, it does wonders and not in a good way at all.
[00:07:18]  Like that's, and when people are like, oh, I'll have a, I'll have a little treat with my coffee.
[00:07:22]  It's like, is coffee that much of a treat for you?
[00:07:25]  It doesn't have to be.
[00:07:26]  Well, and it's so frustrating because everyone tells you you're not fat.
[00:07:30]  Like everybody.
[00:07:30]  When you say, I'm trying to lose weight, because I was always athletic fat.
[00:07:33]  Like I could, I could run a marathon.
[00:07:35]  I could do semi-professional sports.
[00:07:37]  I was athletic fat.
[00:07:39]  So I was like a little over, I ate too much, but I was athletic.
[00:07:42]  Yeah.
[00:07:42]  And everyone would tell me I wasn't fat.
[00:07:45]  I'm like, well, I feel fat.
[00:07:46]  Like, this is fat people habits, you know?
[00:07:49]  But for everyone around you with that like family, well, I'm guessing family, friends, like those closest.
[00:07:54]  Yeah.
[00:07:54]  Yeah.
[00:07:55]  Because I don't, I am tall.
[00:07:58]  So I feel like when you're tall, like it spreads more.
[00:08:00]  I don't know.
[00:08:01]  Maybe that's.
[00:08:02]  I mean, you have more room.
[00:08:03]  Like for, right?
[00:08:05]  It's not when you're petite.
[00:08:07]  Like, yeah, I mean, fat is fat.
[00:08:09]  It doesn't matter if you're.
[00:08:10]  What percent body fat do you try to get women to?
[00:08:13]  Like, um, the thing is, people ask me this all the time.
[00:08:17]  And I, I, I don't even know my own body fat percentage.
[00:08:22]  Like I would say, I don't know.
[00:08:24]  Like when you're a woman, still, you need, you need body fat.
[00:08:27]  Like if you are, if you were a six pack, my goal is never a six pack.
[00:08:30]  Like you're probably losing your period.
[00:08:33]  There's always some other, like, for any woman who's like really, really ripped, that takes so much dedication.
[00:08:39]  I don't want that.
[00:08:40]  So for my clients too, I'm like, that's, that's not the goal.
[00:08:43]  The goal is to look lean, feel lean, put on a bathing suit, feel good, be able to go for drinks, have the food, live your life.
[00:08:50]  If you're like, I want to become a bodybuilder and become like my leanest self and compete in bikini competitions, I will send you on your way to another coach because that's not my arena.
[00:08:59]  And like, I don't think I'll ever get into that, but anything is possible.
[00:09:04]  So, so, what's like your step one when you have a client come on?
[00:09:08]  Yeah, it's interesting because for um, and and when you lost weight, right, it was more than just not just because 20 pounds is a lot, but like you had more weight to lose when you were going through this, right?
[00:09:20]  I see, I think 40 pounds total, yeah, yeah, which is which isn't that far off.
[00:09:25]  But my first step, like, I like using calories in the beginning, just like seeing how much you're consuming.
[00:09:32]  And most people, they have a little bit of a reaction, they're like, Well, I tried calorie counting, calorie counting doesn't work for me.
[00:09:36]  And I'm like, that's like saying that going to the gym doesn't work for you because you have to do it the right way.
[00:09:42]  Like, you can have access to it, you can open up my fitness pal every day.
[00:09:45]  But if you're half-assing it or you eat something that you feel bad and guilty about, then like, of course, it's not going to work.
[00:09:51]  But I like to view calories over the course of a week because if you, if a coach gives someone, and so many coaches do this, they give someone just a calorie amount for the day, you can't stick to that.
[00:10:02]  Like, you, you will be more hungry sometimes, you will overeat.
[00:10:06]  And so, learning, I say, learning how to budget your calories, like you budget your finances, like it's not like learning the consequences too.
[00:10:13]  When you overeat, then we do have to not take that away, but just like level set to show.
[00:10:19]  Well, it's being smarter about when you're going to spend it, what you're going to spend, right?
[00:10:23]  Exactly.
[00:10:24]  If you're opening up your pantry every night and staring at it, and you're like, I really have to stop eating, and then you have dinners out, you have drinks out.
[00:10:32]  The opening up the pantry, that's going to get old.
[00:10:34]  That's not going to be worth it.
[00:10:35]  So, it's really, you know, looking at the calories, seeing how much they're consuming, like going through, I like doing food audits to like pick out exactly what we need to change.
[00:10:43]  Because if you just hand someone a meal plan, that doesn't tell them anything.
[00:10:47]  But when you are able to go into like what exactly they're eating and say, Here's what I would change.
[00:10:52]  You have dinner out tomorrow night.
[00:10:53]  So, here's how we can make the room for that.
[00:10:55]  That's my first step.
[00:10:56]  So, really, just like teaching how to make better decisions around food.
[00:11:02]  And you also don't know what foods they hate.
[00:11:04]  Like, yeah, to eat foods that they like, I hate ground beef.
[00:11:09]  I know that's something people always like with all the fitness coaches, but it's like I'd prefer salmon or chicken to ground beef.
[00:11:15]  I just don't want, you know, and it's like, it's going to be different for each person.
[00:11:18]  And it's going to be torture if you're just doing a like some what someone else wants to eat.
[00:11:22]  You know what I mean?
[00:11:24]  No, exactly.
[00:11:24]  That's why when I, my first year in coaching, sure, I did meal plans.
[00:11:28]  I like had three different templates of vegan, uh, Presbyterian, whatever, and like would send to people and be like, Hey, follow this.
[00:11:36]  That's a bad coach.
[00:11:37]  A coach who does that doesn't know anything.
[00:11:39]  Someone, because everyone has different preferences, likes, dislikes.
[00:11:43]  There's no right or wrong to it.
[00:11:45]  It's just knowing what you seeing what someone likes and then just adjusting it.
[00:11:49]  If I have a client who's like, I hate, I don't have money on this, but like, I hate vegetables, I hate all fruits, I hate all proteins, then it's like, okay, we do have to like find someone.
[00:12:00]  I don't want to like mommy you and be like, no, we should eat our veggies, but I mean, what are we doing?
[00:12:05]  But I would say that most people, like, with the clients I work with, it's not this huge overhaul of their life.
[00:12:11]  The last bit of weight, you're doing so much right already that it's like, what exactly do I have to change with what I'm eating?
[00:12:17]  And also knowing a big one, healthy does not mean losing weight.
[00:12:21]  Like, I eat some healthy, but I can't lose weight.
[00:12:23]  It's like, no, you're overeating still.
[00:12:28]  When you have clients, because you said you still go out and like drink and stuff, what do you tell them to do?
[00:12:34]  Because actually, that's what I've had the hardest time with is restaurants.
[00:12:37]  I feel like I have not found a way to do restaurants.
[00:12:40]  I'm curious what you said.
[00:12:42]  Yeah.
[00:12:42]  Restaurants are hard.
[00:12:44]  Like, and I used to be in the food industry.
[00:12:47]  Like, I, if you tell a chef to be like, okay, go light on the butter, they don't care.
[00:12:53]  Unless you are like deathly allergic to someone, to something, will they accommodate you?
[00:12:58]  If you have those intolerances, sure.
[00:13:00]  But like saying go light on the butter and you're in a busy restaurant, it's going to be hard.
[00:13:04]  So it's going into it, knowing that it's going to be more calories, like regardless.
[00:13:09]  And just knowing how to read a menu and like not my big thing is not every meal has to be the best meal ever.
[00:13:16]  So just because you're dining out, if you are someone who goes out a lot, then yeah, you're going to have to probably pull things in.
[00:13:24]  But a big part of that too is your mindset.
[00:13:26]  Because if you have the mindset of, oh, I'm, I deserve to get the most delicious thing on the menu because I'm spending money and because I'm out to, out to dinner and I'm not cooking it.
[00:13:36]  And that's your mindset and you go out a bunch, then like you're going to have some issues.
[00:13:40]  And so it's, I've noticed it's the bread.
[00:13:43]  I'm like, you can't eat the bread.
[00:13:45]  If you order a carb with it, I don't know.
[00:13:46]  Maybe you found a way to do it.
[00:13:47]  I can't eat the bread.
[00:13:49]  It's like, I always go over if I get the bread.
[00:13:52]  If you start eating it and you're like, I can't stop eating it, or you just have one piece and you're like, that's no, if it's an, I can't, if it's, if it's one, then I'll keep going.
[00:14:01]  I'd rather just not.
[00:14:02]  Yeah, I'm that way too.
[00:14:04]  If it's really good bread, I'll have it.
[00:14:05]  But like, it's just being honest with the fact that giving yourself more room for it.
[00:14:10]  Like knowing in advance that not that you have to be anal about everything, but it is helpful to have a bit of a plan where it's like, if you, if you want to, if you know what you're getting, if you know you're going to have drinks too, then like, do we need the bread?
[00:14:24]  Maybe not.
[00:14:25]  Maybe we just don't have it.
[00:14:27]  But like the bread isn't going to make or break it.
[00:14:29]  But if your reaction to it every time is like, let me eat the entire thing, then like, yeah, want to get that under control.
[00:14:36]  What industries do you think are the fattest for women?
[00:14:40]  Ooh, like, hmm.
[00:14:42]  Like what lifestyle, like, I don't know if you, I'm just curious if you've seen like women in a certain industry or that live in a certain area that tend to be fatter.
[00:14:52]  Yeah.
[00:14:53]  I'm thinking with my clients, it's not fatter in the sense that they have so much weight to lose.
[00:15:00]  And I can't answer it that way, but the harder areas are like women who work in finance, women who are traveling a bunch, who are on the go, like women who are.

=== Why Consistent Calorie Tracking Matters (04:28) ===

[00:15:10]  I work with a lot of women who have a lot of client dinners and they're with a bunch of guys all the time.
[00:15:16]  They feel pressured to not be the one who like gets a salad at dinner.
[00:15:20]  They feel like they have all these client dinners where they need to entertain and like they have to drink because, you know, their client is drinking.
[00:15:28]  And so it's not that they have so much weight to lose, but they have the hardest time doing it because it's not like they can just sit at home and be like, okay, here's my, here's my little salad and no drinks.
[00:15:39]  And so that's why with my coaching, I'm like, it's more lifestyle coaching because you can get lean in like any environment, but you just have to have a better strategy.
[00:15:47]  But in terms of like those who carry the most weight, I don't know.
[00:15:52]  You can, any person can carry more weight than they want to.
[00:15:57]  Do you think there's a difference?
[00:16:00]  No, I think it's more age.
[00:16:01]  Like I think most women get fat after college.
[00:16:04]  Like during, during and after, right?
[00:16:06]  In college, yeah, for sure.
[00:16:08]  Yeah.
[00:16:09]  For me, I blew up right after because I played sports.
[00:16:12]  So I could work out like I could, I was the person that could work out half the day.
[00:16:15]  And then I turned 21, 22.
[00:16:17]  I'm not an athlete anymore.
[00:16:18]  I just blew up.
[00:16:19]  But you were still an athlete.
[00:16:21]  Yeah, it was so fast.
[00:16:22]  It was like six months.
[00:16:24]  Like, I couldn't even believe how quick I gained it.
[00:16:26]  That's what happens.
[00:16:27]  I have so many clients who were like D1.
[00:16:30]  I mean, it doesn't matter D3 athletes who practice a bunch, were on the move a bunch.
[00:16:35]  And then after college, the weight came on.
[00:16:37]  And it's like, then they get convinced.
[00:16:38]  They're like, oh, it's kind of metabolism.
[00:16:40]  It's my age.
[00:16:40]  And it's like, no, or just you're doing things differently than you were before.
[00:16:45]  What's your step two?
[00:16:46]  So you do the food audit.
[00:16:47]  What do you do next with your clients?
[00:16:49]  Yeah.
[00:16:50]  I mean, my biggest thing is like taking away all of the fluff of what you have to do.
[00:16:57]  So it's really like being in a calorie deficit, learning how to be in a calorie deficit and like still eat the foods that you want to eat.
[00:17:03]  So that's, that's a huge one.
[00:17:04]  The second step is just continuing to stay consistent.
[00:17:08]  And when you say, when people use the word consistent, it's such a vague word.
[00:17:11]  It's like consistent with what?
[00:17:13]  But like consistent with tracking, with being mindful of what they're eating, with like approach, with staying within their calories, with like getting in movement, with drinking water.
[00:17:22]  Like I focus on the basics because that's what you'll have to do for the rest of your life.
[00:17:28]  Like, I mean, there's a few phases, learning your calories, seeing that you can fit in whatever you want, making the decision to not always eat whatever you want because that food doesn't make you feel your best, like with having 400 calories of Starbucks every day.
[00:17:40]  Is that worth it?
[00:17:41]  Right.
[00:17:41]  Probably not, but coming to that decision on your own, not just because of the calories, and then that's how you make it into.
[00:17:48]  I mean, a huge thing I do is like your standards, your identity, your mindset, and like that takes time.
[00:17:53]  You need reps with that?
[00:17:55]  Yeah, because I don't know.
[00:17:57]  But like, once you start tracking your calories, I did all these stupid diets and i'm like why the hell did I do Keto and like all this bull, like I did Carnivore?
[00:18:06]  It's like it's because you're lazy to count calories, like I did.
[00:18:10]  I think you said you did a juice cleanse and i'm like i'm just being lazy.
[00:18:13]  I want to like not count calories and just be able to do this diet, but then you start counting calories.
[00:18:19]  It's like why didn't I do this sooner?
[00:18:22]  Like no wonder i'm fat, you know?
[00:18:24]  No, that's why there's a stat I mean this is from years ago, but I think they say that the average American will do like 126 different diets in their lifetime, or just like little things, and that sounds like a lot.
[00:18:37]  But honestly, i've done it's not like a new name for each diet, but like i've done so many juice cleanses in my past.
[00:18:43]  I've done um, the low carb, the keto, the all of that and all of those things work in the sense of, like you have rules that you follow, you get some weight off, but then you start introducing everything back in and then you introduce the fat to come back on because nothing was like.
[00:19:01]  Yeah, it's like you're at 1200 calories, like because my maintenance is around 1800 without working out, and so it's like you go to 1200 calories for three months and you could do it for a few months, but then eventually you're gonna give up.
[00:19:15]  Yeah no, it's not.
[00:19:16]  If that's not what you need, that's not gonna be sustainable at all.
[00:19:20]  Now, if you're a petite woman because people I mean, there's so much on social where it's like 1200 calories isn't even enough for a baby if you're petite, you probably you don't need as many calories like, every person is different, but yeah I, it just yeah, every single person is different, especially with your lifestyle too.

=== Kicked Off TikTok Over Body Talk (03:08) ===

[00:19:38]  What um, what got you kicked off of social media?
[00:19:42]  Did you get banned somewhere?
[00:19:44]  Tick tock I.
[00:19:46]  I mean, i've always been on instagram and then I started doing tick tock a couple years ago.
[00:19:52]  There was the whole like skinny talk thing that came through um, which I just posted a video about, a video about myself saying I oh my gosh, what was it?
[00:20:03]  I don't know something that I things that I like About being skinny, or I'm happier now that I'm skinnier, or whatever.
[00:20:08]  And that kind of kicked it off.
[00:20:10]  And for almost a year, TikTok was like fine with using skinny and fat.
[00:20:15]  And then they started banning things.
[00:20:18]  And so I've just, I've been on that.
[00:20:20]  I've been on Instagram, but just like, I've been before I started doing this, I had a meal prep business in the city that I was posting on Instagram.
[00:20:28]  And so I got like a little following, not that I have a huge one now, but then I transitioned into coaching and use those platforms.
[00:20:34]  So both, both are good.
[00:20:35]  TikTok is like really, really strict with words that you can or can't use.
[00:20:38]  So I've been kicked off a few times.
[00:20:40]  Really?
[00:20:40]  What did you say?
[00:20:41]  It's just because you said you liked being skinny.
[00:20:43]  Just literally using the word skinny that you can't, they don't like that.
[00:20:48]  There's been many, many other attacks by people.
[00:20:52]  People just don't like those words.
[00:20:54]  So it's getting kicked out of the creator fund.
[00:20:56]  Not that I was ever really in that.
[00:20:57]  And then I was kicked out of that three times.
[00:21:00]  Now people message me.
[00:21:01]  They're like, I have to search your name and you won't even come up for me.
[00:21:04]  So there's a little bit of some shadow bans, but that's fine.
[00:21:07]  Instagram has its own issues at times, but it's just crazy like what people can post.
[00:21:14]  And then when it comes to this stuff, they're very strict on it.
[00:21:18]  You know, I got kicked off of TikTok because, yeah, so I got into, I was like, this girl kind of crashed out of me and she called me a slag.
[00:21:26]  And I didn't know what that meant.
[00:21:29]  I know, I didn't either, but I knew I was being insulted.
[00:21:31]  I moved, I moved to London.
[00:21:35]  Yeah, it was like this drunk lady.
[00:21:36]  And she's like, you have, I'll have you, you slag.
[00:21:39]  Like, I don't know.
[00:21:39]  It was crazy.
[00:21:40]  But, and I just said, you're a whale.
[00:21:42]  Like, what are you talking to me?
[00:21:43]  You're a whale.
[00:21:44]  You're fat.
[00:21:46]  And I was fat too.
[00:21:48]  I was kind of chubby too.
[00:21:49]  But she was fatter than I'm like, you can't, you're like morbidly obese.
[00:21:53]  You can't say anything to me.
[00:22:00]  And they banned me because of this, even though she starred and she called me.
[00:22:03]  I'm like, so I can be a whore.
[00:22:05]  I can be that's what I'm whore and British.
[00:22:07]  I didn't know it at the time, but I found out.
[00:22:10]  And yeah.
[00:22:10]  And I'm like, so you can call me a whore, but I can't call you fat.
[00:22:14]  True.
[00:22:15]  You're calling her an animal.
[00:22:18]  I should apologize to the whales in the sea.
[00:22:21]  Yeah, seriously.
[00:22:22]  That's a disgrace to them.
[00:22:23]  Oh my God.
[00:22:24]  They're so strict.
[00:22:26]  Yeah.
[00:22:27]  No, I get a ton of comments.
[00:22:29]  This one girl, I take screenshots of them sometimes just because they're fun.
[00:22:33]  I used to be like really reactive.
[00:22:35]  And now I'm like, okay, not even worth the time.
[00:22:37]  But when I first started getting bigger on TikTok, this one girl commented and she goes, I'd rather pour acid in my eyes than listen to you.
[00:22:46]  And I was like, can you try it?

=== Beyond the Cheese Sprinkle (12:26) ===

[00:22:47]  And let me know how that goes.
[00:22:49]  Don't come at me with empty threats.
[00:22:51]  Like you'll go for it.
[00:22:52]  Like, well, it's like, why are you here?
[00:22:55]  Like, why don't they just go somewhere else?
[00:22:59]  I've only ever commented something sassy back to someone who says that to me.
[00:23:03]  I've never once gone to someone's page and be like, yep, let me, let me say something rude.
[00:23:08]  I just like, don't.
[00:23:10]  Who does that?
[00:23:11]  There's so many women that are just like losers and they just want to be fat forever.
[00:23:15]  And it's just like, they'll make every excuse.
[00:23:17]  And it's like, I've been there, right?
[00:23:19]  I understand.
[00:23:20]  Yeah.
[00:23:22]  Like, why are you making this my problem?
[00:23:24]  Well, I get a ton about like, just you wait until you're older.
[00:23:29]  Just you wait until you go through men.
[00:23:30]  Just you wait till you have kids.
[00:23:31]  And I'm like, well, the good news is I have so many clients who are older than me, a ton, most of them actually, who have kids who look better than they did in high school.
[00:23:40]  So like their college, whatever.
[00:23:42]  So I don't know, like, sorry that that's happening with your life, but like, you don't have to give up on yourself then.
[00:23:47]  You can change.
[00:23:48]  Like, so the just you wait, Karens are like my, the ones that always come in.
[00:23:52]  And so I just want to respond back with pop pictures of my clients.
[00:23:55]  Be like, see, they're good.
[00:23:57]  I know somebody that says that to me all the time.
[00:24:00]  And I'm like, you get large chai tea lattes from Starbucks.
[00:24:04]  It only comes back down to drinks.
[00:24:06]  You get a lot.
[00:24:07]  I don't know.
[00:24:07]  That's what I was going to ask you.
[00:24:09]  It just seems like for women, it's liquid calories.
[00:24:12]  For dudes, it's fried food, maybe?
[00:24:14]  I don't know.
[00:24:15]  Do you take on male clients or no?
[00:24:17]  When I started, I don't anymore unless they pay me a lot.
[00:24:21]  So not really.
[00:24:22]  I just don't want to work with, I like working with women.
[00:24:25]  But for guys, it's just, I don't know, they can gain weight so easily.
[00:24:29]  They can also lose weight so easily too.
[00:24:31]  But I think it's a lot of it, it's drinking.
[00:24:33]  But for women, it's just the little pieces here and there.
[00:24:37]  It's the liquid stuff.
[00:24:38]  It's just no, the big one for women is, oh, I'm eating so healthy, but I can't lose the weight.
[00:24:43]  Oh, I'm doing everything right, but they can't lose the weight.
[00:24:45]  It's like, no, we're not doing something wrong.
[00:24:48]  Give me your top five.
[00:24:49]  So I'm eating so healthy, but I can't lose the weight.
[00:24:53]  Translation, you're fat because you're eating fill in the blank.
[00:24:57]  No, no, obviously too much, but I need like one, like you're eating X, Y. Cause I'm sure you see fat, right?
[00:25:06]  Where it's like the same problems for, like, I'd imagine like some of your clients don't know each other, but they're fat for the same reason, right?
[00:25:13]  That's how everyone is.
[00:25:15]  Everyone thinks that it's such an individualized, I mean, it's such a, oh my gosh, no one else can relate to me.
[00:25:19]  No, most people are struggling with the exact same thing.
[00:25:21]  Okay.
[00:25:22]  So five things that people are overeating that they don't realize.
[00:25:25]  Yeah.
[00:25:26]  Okay.
[00:25:27]  Like collagen, the little, their little collagen like powders, protein powders that they're mixing in.
[00:25:36]  They don't really see that as calories.
[00:25:40]  Okay.
[00:25:40]  There's a bunch.
[00:25:41]  So many people have so many little supplements that like they're adding to things that can be an extra hundred calories a day, but they're like, oh, it's, it's collagen.
[00:25:49]  It's good for me.
[00:25:50]  Sure, but it adds up.
[00:25:52]  So that's one.
[00:25:54]  I would not have thought of that.
[00:25:55]  Okay, keep going.
[00:25:57]  All the things it is, it's, I mean a basic one, olive oil, cooking.
[00:26:03]  You're making something olive oil healthy, but then you aren't measuring it.
[00:26:07]  You don't know how much you're actually using.
[00:26:08]  That's 200 extra calories a day.
[00:26:10]  That's one.
[00:26:15]  Protein bars is one too.
[00:26:18]  I think that people look at labels, they see high protein, they see this is good for me.
[00:26:24]  They get hungry an hour later, and it's like you just had 300 calories of air because that doesn't do anything for you.
[00:26:31]  I just made that transition actually.
[00:26:34]  I just, yeah, where I'm getting rid of protein bars or I'm trying to eat them less because I have the same problem.
[00:26:40]  I'm like, these don't fill me up.
[00:26:41]  No, they're like, I view them as candy.
[00:26:44]  I have them when I'm on the gut, like when I'm desperate.
[00:26:48]  But like, just because it says high protein doesn't mean it's doing anything for you.
[00:26:55]  So good.
[00:26:57]  What else?
[00:26:58]  Things like, I mean, just the healthy things like nuts, seeds, chia seeds.
[00:27:04]  Not again, super healthy things, but like we have a sprinkle in our salad and then it's, we have a sprinkle in our smoothie and it's like, oh, it's so healthy.
[00:27:11]  But then it just continues to add up.
[00:27:15]  The first one, the number one, I don't even know.
[00:27:20]  I want to say cheese, but it's not cheese.
[00:27:22]  Just going out for meals, thinking that you're getting the healthiest thing, but healthy does not mean you're still within your cows.
[00:27:30]  So like they order a salad, but it's still a high calorie and they don't burn it off or something like that.
[00:27:36]  Yeah, even like you mentioned salmon before.
[00:27:38]  Salmon is healthy, right?
[00:27:40]  I love salmon.
[00:27:41]  But if you are going out to a restaurant and getting salmon, being like, okay, I'm being super healthy.
[00:27:46]  It's going to be just, it's one of the fattiest fishes.
[00:27:49]  It's going to be more calories than like a piece of chicken, let's say.
[00:27:55]  So it's those little things that you don't recognize as like a bad thing because it's not bad, but it just, it adds up.
[00:28:02]  And so especially when you're coming down to like the last little, the last bit of weight to lose, it's paying attention to those things.
[00:28:08]  Now, if you're talking about someone who has 100 pounds to lose, different story.
[00:28:12]  Yeah.
[00:28:12]  That's the other thing too.
[00:28:13]  I've just noticed every like round because it seems like every like 10 or 20 pounds, there's just like a few different things you have to pay attention to.
[00:28:22]  So I don't know if you have 50 pounds to look for me, like at first it was getting a hold of the calories.
[00:28:27]  Yeah.
[00:28:28]  And at like every round, I don't know if that makes sense.
[00:28:32]  Have you seen that?
[00:28:32]  Yeah.
[00:28:33]  There's always a next level to get to.
[00:28:37]  Like if you are starting out with 50, 40, 60 pounds, whatever, then it can, it will probably, and maybe you had this, it comes off a little bit faster in the beginning, or did it feel any bit easier in the beginning compared to getting off the last bit of weight or no?
[00:28:52]  Well, in the beginning, I'll tell you, I used to just run marathons every time I wanted to lose weight.
[00:28:56]  Terrible strategy.
[00:28:57]  Very consuming.
[00:28:59]  No, that's awesome, but like that's a lot.
[00:29:02]  Yeah, but I would always the first like 20, I kept off for a while, but then I couldn't get rid of the next like 25.
[00:29:09]  Yeah.
[00:29:10]  Yeah.
[00:29:11]  And so what, what did you, I mean, it comes down to the counting calories.
[00:29:14]  Like you'd rather run marathons than count calories.
[00:29:17]  Is that incredible?
[00:29:18]  Like I can't be the only person that's done that.
[00:29:23]  No, no, no, no.
[00:29:24]  That's everyone.
[00:29:25]  Yeah, I can't be the only one.
[00:29:27]  I'm like, that's so incredible that I just really did not want to do it that bad.
[00:29:32]  Like that's why they exist.
[00:29:35]  That's why the diet industry exists.
[00:29:37]  Yeah, you do everything besides like the one thing that will help you.
[00:29:41]  No, but getting down to the next level, I mean, when you have more weight to lose, a lot of it is like the bigger food changes, right?
[00:29:50]  Learning about, oh, maybe I don't have 400 calories for a Starbucks drink.
[00:29:53]  Let's switch that.
[00:29:54]  But when you get down, it gets harder and harder because you're getting kind of more nitpicky with things and it ends up being more about, and it can sound woo-woo to some, but like your standards that you have.
[00:30:06]  If you are the type of person where every time you, I don't know, if you work in an office and there's a little candy jar, every time you use the bathroom, you grab a Starburst, right?
[00:30:16]  And like, that's not going to do that much damage.
[00:30:18]  But if you have five pounds to lose and it won't come off, then like little things like that are what we need to get a hold of versus like, oh, let's do a huge overhaul of like all your food.
[00:30:28]  So it comes down to the more nitpicky things.
[00:30:30]  And that's why it does take a lot of effort to keep a lean body.
[00:30:35]  I always say like, I clock in every single day to take care of myself, but you weigh like what your priorities are.
[00:30:43]  What percent of clients stick to it?
[00:30:46]  Because there's just no way some people have to sign up and like they just don't do the work.
[00:30:52]  Right.
[00:30:52]  So what percent, like if you get 10 clients, how many are actually going to listen to you?
[00:30:59]  It's a hard thing to measure.
[00:31:01]  I mean, I have, I have a ton of clients and I've worked with so many with sticking with it.
[00:31:07]  It's not just, it is being realistic with my clients saying that it's not weight loss is not a linear thing.
[00:31:14]  Like it's not, we start here and then we end here.
[00:31:16]  Like the shiny object that everyone comes in for is the weight loss, right?
[00:31:20]  But what it actually consists of is the up and down of losing the weight, like being excited about that, but then like honing in on the fact that you have to maintain this.
[00:31:31]  And like, what are the skills that come with that?
[00:31:33]  So for the ones who stick with it and succeed, I don't know.
[00:31:36]  It's why I talk the way I do because I have a very high success rate with my clients because I, so I do things like a lot differently.
[00:31:42]  I'm just realistic with it.
[00:31:44]  But I mean, I hear from clients who I worked with before they got engaged and then they got engaged and they got married and then they had kids and now they're already down the weight because when you do it the right way and just do it, great.
[00:31:56]  But then other people pay for a program that never show up.
[00:32:00]  And there will always be people like that in any industry, any program.
[00:32:05]  That's actually a question.
[00:32:06]  How much of you get fat from kids is cope versus real?
[00:32:11]  For like when we talk about baby weight, is that?
[00:32:15]  Yeah, like what?
[00:32:17]  Okay, if you, if you were to get pregnant, how much weight would you expect to gain and how long would it take you to lose it?
[00:32:24]  I don't know if you have kids.
[00:32:24]  You don't have to say if you don't want, but just like, because I always hear that you have to gain weight with pregnancies and stuff.
[00:32:33]  Yeah.
[00:32:34]  So go ahead.
[00:32:34]  Yeah.
[00:32:35]  No, I mean, you should like you have to gain weight, but it's not 100 pounds that you have to gain.
[00:32:39]  It can be 20.
[00:32:41]  I mean, it depends on how tall the person is, like what like their pregnancy looks like, but you don't have to give into every craving at all.
[00:32:48]  You don't have to eat for two, especially in your first trimester.
[00:32:52]  Your calories don't even be increasing that much.
[00:32:55]  I've worked with a lot of clients who got pregnant while working with me and our focus is not on like losing weight, but just like continuing to feel good.
[00:33:04]  So I would say 20, 30 pounds, 35 pounds.
[00:33:10]  People can do 40, like it just depends.
[00:33:12]  But a lot of that comes off like soon after you have your baby and then with breastfeeding.
[00:33:18]  And then usually it's the last five, 10, 15 that women need help with.
[00:33:22]  But I would not wait.
[00:33:24]  I would not wait to lose the weight, like to get your stuff together until I would do that before you have kids.
[00:33:31]  It's so much harder.
[00:33:32]  Oh, God.
[00:33:32]  Yeah.
[00:33:33]  After kids, you're like cooked.
[00:33:35]  I mean, not actually.
[00:33:36]  I'm sure you work with people, but I don't see many moms getting thin after they have a kid.
[00:33:43]  I just don't.
[00:33:44]  No, but I, my clients, like they're like, I'm in better shape now after having kids than I was in college.
[00:33:51]  Like, because when you have struggled with your weight and just not even that much, when you struggled with your weight and then you have children, there is a part of you or with women that they kind of like give up on where they're like, well, maybe this is just meant to be like my mom body.
[00:34:05]  This is like my age.
[00:34:06]  This is all of that.
[00:34:08]  No, I think that it is so amazing.
[00:34:10]  I like truly so like baller of women who get into even better shape after they had kids because, and I know people will be like, well, I'm so busy and my husband and blah, blah, blah.
[00:34:20]  Like having a supportive partner who like gives you the space to do that, great.
[00:34:25]  But also giving you the space to do that, you're going to be eating either way.
[00:34:30]  Like you're either going to be eating to get into better shape or eating to stay where you are.
[00:34:36]  And like, that's not what we want to do for the most part.
[00:34:38]  And you're going to pass on your habits to the kids.
[00:34:41]  I mean, that's why I was fat because my mom was fat.
[00:34:43]  She ended up losing weight after I was an adult.
[00:34:46]  But I'm like, okay.
[00:34:48]  Yeah, but when I was a kid, I ate grilled cheese and like pasta.
[00:34:51]  Like that was what I ate all the time.
[00:34:53]  And but that's fine, but that's fine.
[00:34:54]  There's no, there's no shame with the pasta or grilled cheese, but obviously if you're having that every single day, then like, yeah, not going to be the best thing ever.
[00:35:02]  But yeah, if you, if you have crappy habits now and you want to have kids, good luck to your kids.
[00:35:07]  You should get that fixed beforehand.
[00:35:08]  Like that should be like a requirement for people going through parenthood.

=== Passing On Crappy Habits (14:38) ===

[00:35:14]  Do you have to tone police yourself ever when it comes to female clients?
[00:35:18]  Like, do you ever find yourself having to hold back or no?
[00:35:22]  I would say if it's been a long day for me and I'm responding, there are times that I have to just like give myself a second.
[00:35:32]  I always say there's no dumb questions and there's not because I also ask a lot of just questions, but I mean, the clients who sign up with me, they sign up for my personality.
[00:35:42]  Well, I mean, for the results for how I talk, right?
[00:35:45]  They know that I'm not someone who's going to be like, oh, okay, we are, we're, we're overeating again.
[00:35:50]  We're doing this again every day.
[00:35:52]  Like, good job.
[00:35:52]  You're trying your best.
[00:35:53]  It's like, no, you're not trying your best, but how do we actually fix it?
[00:35:56]  So I'm never yelling at any, I never yell, but it's, it's, how do we actually give you the solution and how do we stick with it versus just continue doing these crappy things, you know?
[00:36:07]  What do you think of Ozempic?
[00:36:10]  I am neutral with it.
[00:36:12]  Like I, the thing is, people are always like, oh, does it take away from your clients?
[00:36:16]  Are you less busy?
[00:36:18]  No, because the women who are doing Ozempic who do not need it, good luck.
[00:36:23]  If you are doing it to just lose the weight and then not change anything else, if you're not going to stay on it forever, which you probably won't, at some point you're going to get off of it.
[00:36:31]  It's going to come back on.
[00:36:33]  The way the reason I'm neutral on it is like, it's not my life.
[00:36:36]  It's not my body.
[00:36:37]  I don't really care what any other person does.
[00:36:39]  But if you want to keep the weight off for good and you plan on going off of it, then like probably should change it.
[00:36:44]  But I have worked with clients who went on Ozempic because they needed it, lost a good chunk of weight, and then signed up because they wanted to solidify keeping the weight off.
[00:36:52]  And I'm like, good, amazing.
[00:36:54]  What percent of people do you think are on Ozempic?
[00:36:57]  A large amount.
[00:36:58]  Yeah.
[00:36:59]  Any, any like GLP, one I would say, any, any type of microdose, all my TikTok right now is filled with, what is it, peptides.
[00:37:09]  Like, I think it is the new thing of the future.
[00:37:12]  And I think more people than not are on it.
[00:37:16]  Do you think there's going to be side effects or yeah, you think there will?
[00:37:21]  I think, I think we, I don't know how big they will be, but I don't think that there's much.
[00:37:26]  And here's the thing.
[00:37:27]  It's not my area that I'm like specialized in, but I do think that there's just side effects to, I don't know, everything that you're injecting in your body.
[00:37:36]  But who knows?
[00:37:37]  Yeah, it just seems like there'll be a catch.
[00:37:40]  There's always a catch.
[00:37:41]  When you're doing something like that, there's always, it's inevitable.
[00:37:44]  It's going to be here sooner than later.
[00:37:46]  But at the very least, people can ride it out.
[00:37:49]  So.
[00:37:49]  Do you know what?
[00:37:50]  I couldn't figure out when I was younger, there would be these women.
[00:37:52]  I want to see if you can catch this.
[00:37:54]  I couldn't figure out how they were thin because their lifestyle was just so unhealthy.
[00:37:57]  They're drinking all the time, going out all the time.
[00:37:59]  And I just could not.
[00:38:00]  I'm like, how are they thin?
[00:38:03]  And there was, yeah, do you know what the catch was?
[00:38:06]  Probably.
[00:38:09]  Probably not good.
[00:38:12]  Yeah, I think that's good.
[00:38:14]  I didn't know because I was, um, I was really innocent.
[00:38:16]  So I'm like, how are they still thin?
[00:38:18]  Like, I would be fat if I was at these festivals all the time.
[00:38:21]  Yeah.
[00:38:21]  No, I think that there's a lot of things that people do.
[00:38:24]  And when you see someone who has that type of lifestyle and they're posting all this food, they're not eating all this food.
[00:38:30]  Yeah.
[00:38:31]  Like they say that they are, but no, absolutely not.
[00:38:36]  If they're eating all of that, then their body would look a little bit different.
[00:38:39]  Or it's their one meal of the day.
[00:38:40]  And like, that's how they do it.
[00:38:42]  Oh my God.
[00:38:43]  I couldn't do that.
[00:38:43]  I can't fast.
[00:38:44]  I don't know.
[00:38:45]  Some people can just fast half the day.
[00:38:47]  I wish I could.
[00:38:48]  Yeah.
[00:38:48]  I do that during the workday.
[00:38:50]  Like I'm pretty used to it.
[00:38:52]  Um, just because I've done it for some time.
[00:38:54]  I genuinely work best when I'm not like when I start eating food, then I think this, like most people, you start thinking about it a little bit.
[00:39:01]  And so I just, I like to fast, but during the weekends, I eat breakfast.
[00:39:05]  If I'm really hungry, I'll eat breakfast, but it just like it works for me.
[00:39:08]  Fasting is not the reason, it's not the thing to do to lose weight.
[00:39:12]  If you hate doing it, do not do it.
[00:39:14]  Have you ever had to drop a client?
[00:39:16]  And if so, why?
[00:39:19]  Yeah, there's been a couple.
[00:39:20]  There's also been a few people that I even recently that I had some consults with.
[00:39:25]  And like, usually I'll follow up with someone if they don't sign up right away.
[00:39:28]  But for a handful, I'm just like, they, I know that they won't be a good fit.
[00:39:32]  Um, for clients who are that I've dropped, and there haven't been many because I usually do a pretty good vetting process.
[00:39:38]  And like my coaching isn't cheap.
[00:39:40]  It's not like I just let anyone come in.
[00:39:42]  Um, but for people who just like keep coming with the same issues, who are not coachable, who like don't listen, like just cut ties early.
[00:39:52]  It's too, it's as I've like grown bigger with this, it's a waste of my energy.
[00:39:56]  If you can't listen and do it, then like signara.
[00:40:00]  So, what do you think about all these celebrities getting on Ozempec that were formerly body positive?
[00:40:06]  Oh, a joke.
[00:40:08]  Like it is a slap in the face.
[00:40:11]  Like for it, so everyone wants to, and there will be two people raising their hand saying, not me.
[00:40:21]  Everyone wants to lose weight.
[00:40:22]  Everyone wants to be lean.
[00:40:23]  Everyone wants to look good.
[00:40:25]  They want to do it now because they have the opportunity to do it after trying so many times and they don't have to accept that they have to like stay fat because they couldn't get the weight off.
[00:40:33]  It is like people do it was the biggest 360 or 180 to see of, oh, oh no, I'm actually skinny now because I can be on Ozemte.
[00:40:42]  Oh no, I don't agree with anything I just said before.
[00:40:44]  Like everyone, it is the standard.
[00:40:48]  It's just incredible.
[00:40:49]  You guys all took so much money.
[00:40:51]  You took everybody's money when you were fat and now you're taking Ozempic.
[00:40:58]  It's like a trainer.
[00:40:59]  Screw you.
[00:41:00]  Like, I grew up during that song was popular.
[00:41:04]  It's wild.
[00:41:05]  Like, fuck you guys.
[00:41:08]  Like, come on.
[00:41:10]  It's crazy.
[00:41:11]  It's like, just, but like, the thing is, at the same time, doesn't impact me, but I hope everyone has learned their lesson to stop listening to people who are preaching something that they don't actually believe.
[00:41:21]  Do what's best for you.
[00:41:22]  Like, except BS.
[00:41:25]  It's true.
[00:41:26]  They all get on Ozempic, divorce their husbands, and say, just kidding.
[00:41:30]  Yeah.
[00:41:33]  Speaking of dating, do you see your clients?
[00:41:37]  Okay.
[00:41:38]  So I think a lot of women are 20 pounds from love.
[00:41:40]  Okay.
[00:41:41]  Because a lot of guys will sleep down, right?
[00:41:44]  I mean, guys will sleep with damn near anything.
[00:41:47]  If you ever see a guy's roster, it's like incredible.
[00:41:49]  Like a guy that's an eight will go with a four.
[00:41:51]  It's like incredible.
[00:41:52]  But a lot of times there's like guys that like a girl, but they're just kind of hoping.
[00:41:57]  And I've heard this from so many guys where they liked a girl, they would date her, but she just is a little too fat.
[00:42:03]  And a lot of women, like the guy that they can't get commitment from, you're like 20, 30 pounds away, baby.
[00:42:08]  Just get on the treadmill.
[00:42:10]  But guys are never going to tell you.
[00:42:11]  Have you seen something similar with your clients or their dating lives getting better after they lose the weight?
[00:42:17]  From both ends.
[00:42:18]  And like, I went through this myself, but like I can tell my own little story.
[00:42:22]  But for my clients, I think a big thing is just having more confidence with dating too, where putting less emphasis on does the guy like me and more on, oh, do I actually like him?
[00:42:33]  Because they, they like themselves more.
[00:42:35]  They know that they look better.
[00:42:36]  They know that they're a better catch.
[00:42:38]  Because yes, your appearance, like you kind of date your league, I would say for a lot of people.
[00:42:44]  For most people, that's kind of how it works.
[00:42:45]  And so they know that they can get better.
[00:42:48]  But for a lot of women, yeah, I've heard this from so many guys.
[00:42:51]  I've seen too, where like the dating wasn't really going well, but then they lost the weight.
[00:42:55]  They dropped their part, like who they were with, and then started dating someone better because then they realized they deserve better.
[00:43:01]  So it's, it goes, it goes both ways to it.
[00:43:06]  Yeah, because it's like, I don't know.
[00:43:09]  Tell me, what was your story?
[00:43:10]  You said you changed like dating when you lost the weight.
[00:43:14]  Yeah, I mean, I think just like I, I mean, I definitely had to like glow up with it, but a lot of it is confidence.
[00:43:22]  Like when you aren't that secure, I wasn't that secure in myself at all.
[00:43:27]  And like I, I once worked, I worked in corporate before I went off on my own.
[00:43:32]  And for one of my jobs, like my name is Amanda.
[00:43:34]  I've never gone by Mandy, but I worked at this company where my boss's name was Amanda as well.
[00:43:42]  And during my interview, she's like, oh, I want to call you Mandy.
[00:43:45]  And I'm like, okay, sure.
[00:43:47]  And then I got the job.
[00:43:48]  And then for my two years at that company, my name was Mandy because that's just like, sure, this is what people will call me.
[00:43:55]  And so just having not as much self-like respect and that also translated into dating where my focus was on a fake timeline for myself of I need to get married by this age, have kids by this age.
[00:44:06]  I just need to find the guy like who I can end up with.
[00:44:10]  And it was just like a bunch of, you know, some normal people, a bunch of losers too, because I just wasn't really like my best self for it.
[00:44:17]  And so.
[00:44:17]  when you actually are a better person, you can date better.
[00:44:21]  Yeah.
[00:44:21]  And American women are so fat.
[00:44:23]  Guys just want someone that's thin.
[00:44:24]  You know, they really, I mean, people will say, people have, there's a, what's it saying?
[00:44:29]  There's a kettle for every pot, there's a pot for every cup, whatever that is.
[00:44:32]  Like there's always someone for someone.
[00:44:34]  But I would say, if you want to date a guy who is good looking, who makes money, who takes care of himself, what are you, people always say, what are you offering?
[00:44:43]  Oh, a woman doesn't have to offer anything.
[00:44:45]  Yes, you do.
[00:44:46]  If you're not taking care of yourself, why would you expect to be with someone who is like the top of the top if you cannot be top of the top?
[00:44:52]  Oh my gosh, that's incredible.
[00:44:54]  I've interviewed so many fat women that say they want in-shaped men.
[00:44:58]  And I'm like, yeah, they'll screw you.
[00:45:00]  I mean, a black guy will do it.
[00:45:01]  Let's just see here.
[00:45:04]  I'm at, I'm at 30.
[00:45:06]  People, people will, there's always someone for someone, but like.
[00:45:11]  Black men and fat women are like not makes sense.
[00:45:17]  I mean, that not that, but like, as you know, why, why would you want to date someone who goes to the gym when you don't even go to the gym?
[00:45:28]  Yeah.
[00:45:29]  What do you have in common?
[00:45:31]  You like, you both like that he goes to the gym.
[00:45:32]  I don't know.
[00:45:33]  People are, it's just, it also just comes with like taking care of yourself.
[00:45:37]  My husband works out.
[00:45:38]  If he didn't work out, we wouldn't be a fit.
[00:45:40]  I want someone who like goes to the gym and does that.
[00:45:44]  What do you think about women that gain weight after marriage?
[00:45:48]  Like, that's really common where they, yeah, yeah, men too, right?
[00:45:52]  Yeah.
[00:45:54]  Go look at my recent, I made a lot of people mad recently on Instagram because I created a video and I said, if my, if my husband ever got fat, like I would tell him, like, just as he would tell me, never asked to tell me, but there's a lot of like less than average people in my comments being like, your weight, you should not, you should love anyone at any size.
[00:46:20]  And I said, no, as a parent, your love is, you will love them with whatever.
[00:46:24]  But for your part, like for whoever you're with, like, you should take care of yourself.
[00:46:28]  I think that people who let themselves go once they get married did not have anything like set for them before they got married because it just, it's unnatural to let yourself go to an extent when you've been taking care of yourself for however long.
[00:46:42]  That doesn't really happen.
[00:46:43]  You don't see people like that who had like good habits prior.
[00:46:46]  Now, for those who let themselves go after the wedding, after whatever, it's probably because they were trying really hard during dating for the wedding.
[00:46:53]  And then they're like, okay, I'm safe now.
[00:46:55]  What are you safe from?
[00:46:56]  Like, you don't look good.
[00:46:57]  You don't feel good.
[00:46:58]  That's an in-shape guys don't want to deal with your bad habits, like, because you're going to break into his lifestyle.
[00:47:04]  Like, I don't know if you're into more traditional gender roles and you want to cook for it.
[00:47:07]  He doesn't want you to cook gross food or like food that's going to make him fat if he's in shape.
[00:47:12]  You know?
[00:47:12]  Yeah.
[00:47:13]  Exactly.
[00:47:13]  Like, what, again, like, what is, what is your offer?
[00:47:18]  Because at some point, it's not just, I always see stuff on social where it's like, the woman's role is to just exist.
[00:47:25]  And I'm like, what are you talking about?
[00:47:27]  Just exist with what?
[00:47:28]  Like, create your own life.
[00:47:29]  Do your own thing.
[00:47:30]  Like, yes, you're existing, but like, you can do more than that too.
[00:47:34]  Yeah.
[00:47:35]  Why not?
[00:47:36]  Sometimes just lazy women, I just cannot stand.
[00:47:40]  I cannot like, it's just that have an excuse for everything.
[00:47:44]  I think it's because the world kind of coddles them and they just, they won't tell you you're fat.
[00:47:48]  They won't tell you you're in a bunch of debt.
[00:47:50]  They won't like, we don't have a, I'm trying to think of a good word for female losers.
[00:47:54]  And I haven't come up with it.
[00:47:56]  I just say, I like, I love the word loser.
[00:47:58]  It's not being a loser in your own life.
[00:48:00]  You're literally, it's your life.
[00:48:02]  Why are you acting like the person that you'd be like yelling at on TV being like, get your shit together?
[00:48:06]  Just do it.
[00:48:07]  Like it's not, it's your one life.
[00:48:09]  But yeah, I think that women, they just, they make excuses.
[00:48:12]  They, they see all of this garbage of it's your metabolism.
[00:48:16]  It's your genetics.
[00:48:16]  It's your hormones.
[00:48:18]  It's like you have a soft life.
[00:48:20]  Like be feminine.
[00:48:21]  I'm like, well, it's not very feminine to be, as I used to deal with binge eating to be stuffing your face and like holding on to weight because that's body positivity.
[00:48:30]  No, it's take care of yourself.
[00:48:31]  And most of your ancestors were farmers.
[00:48:33]  Like none of your ancestors had soft lives.
[00:48:36]  Like, I don't know this idea.
[00:48:37]  Like we had like 20 years of the 50s where women like stayed home, maybe had softer lives for like 20 years, but their husbands were also at war.
[00:48:46]  Yeah.
[00:48:47]  No, go watch the recent dinosaur Netflix documentary where it talks about all the dinosaurs and like where the world started, how everything started.
[00:48:56]  And like, it's just, it will put a different perspective on things.
[00:49:00]  But with women having a soft life now, it's like, what the hell does that even mean?
[00:49:04]  If you want a soft life, work hard now and then you'll have a soft life to get from it.
[00:49:08]  Google a day in the life of the Amish.
[00:49:10]  That was your, that was your ancestors.
[00:49:12]  Like they're like, they're using all these old machines.
[00:49:16]  It's no wonder they didn't have to diet because their life was so like calorie.
[00:49:20]  They're working for it.
[00:49:22]  Yeah.
[00:49:22]  If they have a machine heavy or workforce heavy, yeah, for sure.
[00:49:27]  Turn the butter.
[00:49:29]  Do you think health is a deal breaker for marriage?
[00:49:34]  In the sense of like someone taking care of themselves.
[00:49:37]  Yeah.
[00:49:38]  Like I don't know if you're with a partner that won't lose weight.
[00:49:42]  Do you think that's a deal breaker?
[00:49:45]  Yeah.
[00:49:45]  I mean, like, I thought that's okay.
[00:49:49]  Like, well, it's what if it's what if it's whatever.

=== Disclosing Steroid Use and Health (08:54) ===

[00:49:52]  What do you think?
[00:49:53]  Duh.
[00:49:54]  Like, like, when I was, when I was 20 pounds heavier, I was more depressed.
[00:49:59]  Like, people who are depressed, of course, there can be this vague answer.
[00:50:02]  But, like, if so, if you're dealing with someone who's depressed, help them, right?
[00:50:06]  Of course, that's it.
[00:50:07]  But people love to be all hypothetical.
[00:50:10]  Well, what if it's this?
[00:50:11]  What if it's this?
[00:50:11]  What if it's this?
[00:50:12]  It's not that.
[00:50:13]  Yeah, it's not that.
[00:50:14]  They're just, you know, I wouldn't date someone.
[00:50:17]  I wouldn't want to be with someone who is like overweight.
[00:50:20]  That's just not what I'm doing.
[00:50:22]  And I chose my person.
[00:50:24]  So like, check that off.
[00:50:27]  What do you think about, I don't know, because I see it on social media all the time where women are mad that men like thin women.
[00:50:35]  Yeah.
[00:50:37]  What do you think?
[00:50:38]  The thing is, you can find a guy who doesn't like thin women.
[00:50:44]  Yeah.
[00:50:46]  I'm sure that they have like platforms for that to date someone who likes that.
[00:50:51]  But like, how can you get mad at such a generalized thing?
[00:50:56]  You either, if you want, I don't know, like lose the weight unless, unless find someone who loves you for who you are and you want to keep your weight, perfect.
[00:51:03]  There will be someone I'm sure out there like that.
[00:51:06]  But it just, I don't know, stop at the same time, stop blaming men for like your, your problems.
[00:51:12]  Like you can find someone worthy to date too.
[00:51:16]  That's my take.
[00:51:17]  Yeah.
[00:51:18]  No, I agree.
[00:51:21]  Is there anything else you want to tell the audience?
[00:51:23]  Like just that you think we missed or where to find you?
[00:51:27]  Go ahead.
[00:51:28]  Yeah.
[00:51:28]  What we missed.
[00:51:29]  I would say just learn how to lose weight the right way if you're if you're dieting.
[00:51:36]  Oh, wait.
[00:51:37]  Where did you go?
[00:51:38]  Oh my God.
[00:51:39]  Sorry.
[00:51:40]  I clicked something bad.
[00:51:41]  Keep going.
[00:51:41]  Say, could you repeat yourself if you don't mind?
[00:51:43]  I was going to say just learn how to lose weight the right way because if what you're doing today is not sustainable for the rest of your life, it's going to come back.
[00:51:50]  And like life is so much easier when you don't have to worry about your weight and like when you like how that when you like how you look, it's important.
[00:51:58]  Your appearance matters.
[00:51:59]  People treat you better too.
[00:52:01]  It's a thing.
[00:52:01]  But no, I mean, I think we covered a lot.
[00:52:05]  Work on yourself, right?
[00:52:07]  It's important.
[00:52:08]  And where to find me is just Amanda underscore Dobler on Instagram.
[00:52:14]  Would you mind?
[00:52:14]  My co-host, Doug MPA, he's a fan of you.
[00:52:18]  He just maybe have some questions.
[00:52:21]  Doug MPA, welcome to the show.
[00:52:24]  Amanda, you are a treasure and a jewel.
[00:52:26]  Thank you for joining the show.
[00:52:28]  Appreciate it.
[00:52:30]  I'm glad that you addressed the whole not having to tone your not having to tone police yourself because a lot of people think you have to talk gentle.
[00:52:40]  I know you have to know your audience.
[00:52:42]  Yeah.
[00:52:42]  You have to talk gentler to women.
[00:52:44]  That's the only way that they're going to listen and blah, blah, blah.
[00:52:48]  Do you think that there's a distinct difference when it comes to fitness and health on how you talk to women and how you talk to men?
[00:52:56]  I think that men can be bigger babies sometimes.
[00:52:58]  I think that with the type of woman I attract, like they want to be told exactly what they need, what they need help with, what they're doing wrong.
[00:53:06]  Like that's how I am.
[00:53:07]  When I get help with something with my own life coaching, I'm like, I can take it.
[00:53:11]  It's not getting criticism.
[00:53:13]  It's literally just helping you be a better person.
[00:53:17]  Now, there are a lot of women who just want to say, wow, like good job for trying.
[00:53:22]  And like they go to another coach.
[00:53:24]  But with sugarcoating anything, why?
[00:53:25]  Like, you're here to get results.
[00:53:27]  You're here to change your life.
[00:53:29]  So, like, why do we have to tiptoe around the thing that's keeping you exactly where you don't want to be?
[00:53:33]  You know?
[00:53:34]  Yeah, you got to see her content, Doug MPA.
[00:53:36]  I've been watching her for a while.
[00:53:38]  She does not, if the girls that are sugarcoated, are not going to.
[00:53:44]  Yeah.
[00:53:45]  I will say, my clients are like, you're a lot nicer as a coach because you get more of me.
[00:53:49]  It's not just to the general public of like, hey, you're whatever.
[00:53:54]  And like, I don't know who I'm talking to online.
[00:53:56]  But then, like, my clients sign on and it's like, oh, here's how we actually solve the issue that you have, you know?
[00:54:03]  Um, I also wanted to address the whole so male fitness influencers.
[00:54:09]  I think they kind of have a responsibility to say if they're on steroids or not.
[00:54:15]  Um, do you think that women fitness influencers have a responsibility to say if they're on some kind of Ozimp or some kind of GLP or something like that?
[00:54:26]  Uh, I mean, I would say, yeah, like disclose if you've had a BBL, disclose if you are like taking something to not set unrealistic expectations, especially if you're a new coaches do.
[00:54:38]  They lost a good chunk of weight and now they're trying to coach because they've lost the weight, but they did it in a very different manner.
[00:54:45]  Um, so it could be good to disclose.
[00:54:47]  A lot of people don't and probably never will, but that's what makes them bad coaches.
[00:54:51]  So, you need to like research who you're actually dealing with.
[00:54:55]  So, it could be good, but like, they'll never, they'll never make a law about that, you know, or with people follow it.
[00:55:01]  Oh, God, if they banned filters, that would scream.
[00:55:06]  Like, imagine if you had to actually show your blubber on the internet.
[00:55:12]  No, I would, that's why I'm on, like, that's why I just am honest.
[00:55:16]  I'm like, I've picked food out of a garbage can before when I struggled with binge eating years ago, because there's no honesty, and you need to be honest in order to like help people.
[00:55:24]  So, what's the shame?
[00:55:26]  Everyone does weird stuff, you just got to fix it.
[00:55:29]  Um, and then, so have you seen it?
[00:55:35]  Because I've seen GLP side effects, like some people say that they lose their vision and stuff.
[00:55:40]  Have you seen anything, any, any, have you been around enough people on GLPs to see any kind of common side effects or do you see anything coming down the road from this trend, what you've seen?
[00:55:54]  Yeah, I mean, I would say that for some people who are on it, it just, it gets rid of their shape.
[00:56:02]  Like they go a little flat in places.
[00:56:06]  I think that there is such a thing as like Ozembic face.
[00:56:09]  You can tell.
[00:56:10]  Who has lost weight in a short period of time and just how it makes them look.
[00:56:14]  Because, at the end of the day, if you want to lose weight great, but like you also want to look good, and there kind of reaches a point with that.
[00:56:20]  Um, and I think it is a parent who was on the Glp With, or Ozembic whatever, who lost weight years ago, went off it and now they're they're big again, which has happened to a handful of influencers that just show up on my feed.
[00:56:34]  So, and then I guess I have one last question.
[00:56:38]  So um, I would, I really couldn't stand personal trainers in the gym that they tried to get you dependent on them for their health, because you know, ultimately personal training is about making money.
[00:56:52]  So they would want to get them in this mindset where you need me to be healthy so you can keep paying me to be a personal trainer.
[00:57:01]  Um, you know i've been into fitness most of my life and the people that i've helped I try to get them self-sustaining.
[00:57:08]  So I mean, what is your, is your goal?
[00:57:12]  To get people into a healthy lifestyle where they eventually they have the skills and stuff to not really need you anymore and and choose to stay.
[00:57:20]  Or and then also in your industry, what do you see?
[00:57:23]  More of?
[00:57:23]  People that try to get people dependent on them or people that try to get people self-sustaining.
[00:57:29]  I would say what i've seen more of is people who try to get just clients first.
[00:57:36]  I think that there are so many coaches out there who don't know what they're doing and so they try to just say they're gonna heal someone and like get all these clients in, and then they don't end up like getting those people to resign because they're not doing a good job.
[00:57:48]  Um, I think that a lot of people.
[00:57:51]  I think that there are also some great coaches out there where their focus is making it like sustainable skills for life.
[00:57:56]  That's what my focus is.
[00:57:57]  Where you won't like me eventually.
[00:58:00]  I don't want to like babysit anyone.
[00:58:02]  Right, mine is pretty advanced in that sense, But my approach with this is this type of mentorship and coaching isn't different from like what I have a business approach for.
[00:58:12]  You're going to have new goals along the way.
[00:58:14]  And so you want someone who can help you with those goals because the goal at first might just be lose weight.
[00:58:20]  But then it's like, what else do we have going on?
[00:58:22]  So it's being self-sufficient, but it's also understanding that you have one goal.
[00:58:26]  As long as you're a living, breathing human being who is like a high-achieving person, you're going to continue to have new levels of goals.
[00:58:32]  And so like having being able to support someone with that.
[00:58:36]  So I have a lot of clients who just do one run with me.
[00:58:38]  I have clients who I've been with for over a year, year and a half, and those are the clients who started out with only five pounds to lose.
[00:58:44]  And like it just ends up being a larger thing than that.

=== Mentorship Beyond Weight Loss (07:52) ===

[00:58:47]  So let me know if that answered it for you.
[00:58:51]  Yeah, that is.
[00:58:52]  That's a really good answer.
[00:58:55]  What was your, off the top of your head, what was your biggest with a client off the top of your head?
[00:59:00]  You don't have to name names or anything, but what was your biggest aha moment where they were your client and then you just saw a light bulb go off of their head.
[00:59:09]  They're like, what?
[00:59:11]  Like you, you kind of saw the moment where you changed their life towards giving them a healthier lifestyle.
[00:59:18]  Can you think of anything?
[00:59:19]  Yeah, I mean, I'm sure I have a bunch I'm here to think.
[00:59:24]  I would say that for most women I work with, their 30s, 40s, they've been in there stuck in their habits for some time.
[00:59:32]  And so it's the realization that like just because I've been, I don't know, like coping with food, that's a big one.
[00:59:40]  Doesn't mean that I have to continue to do that.
[00:59:42]  And like how good it actually feels to not do that.
[00:59:46]  That's a little bit of a vague answer.
[00:59:47]  My stuff is more like mindset.
[00:59:49]  But I think the biggest aha moment is just how it, I had a client who texted me a few weeks ago who down 10 pounds, right?
[00:59:55]  Doesn't seem like that much, but she's not binging anymore.
[00:59:58]  And she now fully believes that she can be like the CEO of her, of her, my God, of her practice.
[01:00:05]  And so it's just seeing this belief that happens in all other areas of your life because now you believe in yourself for like doing hard things.
[01:00:12]  So I think that's the most important and like cool thing to witness.
[01:00:16]  Awesome.
[01:00:17]  Awesome.
[01:00:18]  Cool.
[01:00:19]  Thank you so much for answering my questions.
[01:00:21]  I really appreciate it.
[01:00:22]  This has been a great live stream.
[01:00:23]  Wow.
[01:00:23]  Thank you so much for coming on.
[01:00:25]  Of course.
[01:00:26]  Yeah, thanks for coming, Amanda.
[01:00:28]  We're a fan of you.
[01:00:29]  So come back anytime.
[01:00:30]  If you ever wear a green next time because I feel like I'm not matching here with you.
[01:00:38]  If you ever want to talk about fat women, we're here.
[01:00:42]  Yeah.
[01:00:45]  This is a no-whale zone over here.
[01:00:48]  Well, we cannot, we allow recovering whales, but you got to be recovering.
[01:00:53]  I had one girl come on my channel and she came on for a cooking show and she's like, I know I'm a whale.
[01:01:00]  Oh my God.
[01:01:01]  I'm working on it.
[01:01:02]  Like oh god, oh my god, or um, i'm gonna recommend a video on Pearl's channel.
[01:01:09]  So there's this girl that was on tick tock and she went viral because she, she was she, she was a bigger woman and she had the septum piercing and all that stuff.
[01:01:19]  And she went to a bar and went to go talk to three guys and she, she starts her camera and she's walking down the street talking about the loneliness epidemic.
[01:01:29]  And so I got her on the show and Pearl just gave her like a breakdown.
[01:01:34]  Like you need to lose weight, like you're.
[01:01:37]  You know you have the septum piercing, you know you have these crazy looking glasses on your face.
[01:01:41]  You're like 300 pounds, like you know what.
[01:01:44]  And so Pro did a really good job of breaking down this girl.
[01:01:48]  What men think?
[01:01:50]  And yeah, watch that episode an attractive men banger, she showed me I I always have people show me their rosters.
[01:01:56]  I'm always i'm nosy, so but like Mpa, you told me about the girl you were dating that like if she lost weight you would have taken her seriously.
[01:02:05]  But 100 yeah, like she was good.
[01:02:08]  You said she was a good person.
[01:02:10]  But you know, and that's so fine, I think you can be as picky as you want and if, like there's, there's no shame in saying that at all.
[01:02:19]  It the sad part about it is it's like you, most guys who who, who are worth something or that women will want to pursue.
[01:02:29]  We have those women where they can come over to your house and they can hang out and watch tv and stuff, but but you don't want to be seen with them in public.
[01:02:36]  Yeah, and that's why the female dating advice is like because it'll be like oh, he doesn't appreciate you, he doesn't do this, he doesn't like you, like that.
[01:02:45]  But you know, the question is, why?
[01:02:46]  Is it because you're fat or your personality?
[01:02:48]  It might not be like yeah, being in public girl and 30 pounds, you know oh exactly, I was, I was.
[01:02:56]  You said that to me when we were dm dming.
[01:02:58]  I told my husband he's like, no, that's, true.
[01:03:00]  He's like hey, that happened with you and i'm like you know what it did.
[01:03:05]  What it is is, as a guy, you want the woman that you.
[01:03:09]  I'm not saying that she has to be beautiful, but she's a reflection of your hard work and your values in life.
[01:03:16]  You know, and you're, when you're with a woman, it's like you're disciplined or you're going somewhere.
[01:03:22]  You make a lot of money and you know that's who you're with.
[01:03:26]  Like What men?
[01:03:28]  we look at each other kind of like that.
[01:03:29]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:03:30]  And like, I mean, women judge each other, but it's a completely different way.
[01:03:35]  Like, men in society will judge you on the type of woman that you're with.
[01:03:39]  I mean, I'm sorry.
[01:03:40]  It's just how it is.
[01:03:41]  And I've heard that from so many guys.
[01:03:43]  Like, that is like one of the number one things I hear from men is: I like her.
[01:03:48]  I would date her, but she's 20, 30.
[01:03:51]  If she's this big now, how big is she going to be when we have kids?
[01:03:55]  Because guys automatically think 20 pounds with each kid.
[01:03:58]  So if you're like 150 or 160, if you have two or three kids, you're pushing 200, you know, 200.
[01:04:05]  That's how they think.
[01:04:06]  But it's also true.
[01:04:08]  Like, if you can't get a hold of it now, it's only going to get harder.
[01:04:12]  Like, you have to do it now.
[01:04:14]  So, yeah.
[01:04:15]  I mean, I told my husband, I'm like, you're safe with this.
[01:04:17]  So, like, good, good for you.
[01:04:19]  She's a bit overweight.
[01:04:20]  I don't care.
[01:04:21]  You must be black.
[01:04:24]  Don't see I agree.
[01:04:26]  Yeah.
[01:04:26]  You know, I'm, you know, I'm black and I color slide on what she said.
[01:04:31]  I'm the one because I, you know, I have friends and like that are women.
[01:04:35]  And like, I tell them, I'm like, a good indicator of your health is how many black men hit on you on a daily basis.
[01:04:43]  Because part of my platform, I keep saying, guys, black men, we have to do better.
[01:04:48]  We have to.
[01:04:49]  We accept too little.
[01:04:52]  We accept big women.
[01:04:54]  And I have no idea.
[01:04:55]  I'm on a crusade to get my brothers to stop accepting these big women.
[01:05:01]  You know what?
[01:05:02]  I was at a gym in London.
[01:05:03]  It was a personal training gym.
[01:05:05]  And if there was, there's a lot of like really built guys there.
[01:05:10]  And I was like, if there was ever a super old woman, like 60 plus or a fat woman at the gym, I just knew there was like five trainers there that were black.
[01:05:19]  Yeah.
[01:05:23]  Namanda, like you don't have to say anything, although we know that you know exactly what we're talking about.
[01:05:30]  But yeah, you know, I, I, I'm not saying it, guys.
[01:05:33]  She's not saying it.
[01:05:36]  So yeah.
[01:05:37]  Or, or uh, um, even the girl that I was talking about who came on on Pearl's channel, the bigger girl, she literally, what did she say, Pearl?
[01:05:46]  She said, I get hit on by a lot of black guys.
[01:05:49]  Yo, it's just like, they'll do it.
[01:05:52]  My God, they'll do it.
[01:05:54]  Yeah, it's terrible, man.
[01:05:55]  Like, we have to do better, guys.
[01:05:57]  We have to do better.
[01:05:59]  They won't.
[01:05:59]  I mean, look, it's not, they can bang thin women too, but it's just how low they'll go is just lower than the white guys.
[01:06:05]  Why would we put with this?
[01:06:07]  It's like 90-day fiancé.
[01:06:08]  You put that on, and 90-day fiance, you have the guys who want to come over here, and they don't care who they are with.
[01:06:14]  They just want to come over here and they do it.
[01:06:17]  I see.
[01:06:18]  Get the men together to stop feeding the hippos.
[01:06:21]  It's why they got these big egos because you know what?
[01:06:24]  It would be like there's this one woman at the gym I used to go to, and she was oh, I don't know how she was at the gym all the time, but she was not losing weight.
[01:06:32]  I'll tell you that much.
[01:06:34]  And she just thought she was hot.
[01:06:36]  And I'm like, it's because these trainers keep banging her.

=== Men Who Bang Fat Chicks (07:01) ===

[01:06:39]  I'm like, what are you guys doing?
[01:06:41]  You should be training her.
[01:06:43]  Yeah.
[01:06:44]  And that's the thing.
[01:06:46]  So, your message to women as you're training them, like we, when you said that this woman adopted healthier habits and then she realized that she could become the CEO of her company, um, that type of motivation should be what women are looking for, not like that confidence, not the confidence that like men will sleep with me.
[01:07:14]  Understand what I'm saying?
[01:07:15]  Like, because that's two different types of confidence or waste or two different you understand what I'm trying to say.
[01:07:23]  Like, you should be getting into shape to try to get that level of confidence, not just sexual attraction from men.
[01:07:31]  Because sexual attraction in this current dating market is not a good barometer, if anything, to tell you the truth, because men will sleep with anything.
[01:07:40]  You want the my takeaway is you want the confidence as a woman, like if you're with someone who like my thing, I love my husband, love being married, but like I also have the confidence if anything were to happen, I'm set, I'm financially amazing on my own.
[01:07:54]  I'm so confident with everything in my life, and like that to me is most important.
[01:07:59]  So, like, there's a confidence of looking better, right?
[01:08:01]  But then there's a confidence of like literally owning your life and doing what you want to do, and like, not just like going through the motions, like being just like a piece of dust.
[01:08:10]  Like, you want to feel really confident with everything that you do in life.
[01:08:14]  And I think that's super empowering for both men and women, right?
[01:08:17]  But especially with women, because they take like, I don't know, I feel like a lot of women take the step back and they're like, oh, I just want to be someone's wife.
[01:08:24]  I just want to have kids.
[01:08:25]  And that's great, right?
[01:08:26]  I used to want that.
[01:08:27]  And like, still, you know, can, but I think you can let yourself go deeper than that, too.
[01:08:32]  So I have one more thing about your.
[01:08:34]  So, okay, would you agree that there's a lot of cope when it comes to women and accepting a healthier lifestyle?
[01:08:45]  Like a lot of cope with what?
[01:08:49]  As in, like, oh, you're not fat, you know, you're just, you know, thick or, you know, oh, yeah.
[01:08:57]  A real man would accept you at your current weight or blah, blah, blah.
[01:09:01]  And have you ever had to talk to women about cope and the social infrastructure in place to make them okay with being big or like or like and then my second part is have you met women who spend more time coping than if they were to just lose the weight?
[01:09:21]  Yeah, I would say a lot of people go through the coping motions of they want to lose the weight, they try, it's too hard, they quit, they turn to body positivity, whatever, try to suck it up, and then they realize, I hate how I look.
[01:09:32]  And it's a whole cycle that they're stuck in.
[01:09:34]  It's like the hamster wheel of it.
[01:09:36]  But in terms of helping women cope with just being bigger, I help them say you don't have to be big.
[01:09:43]  It's not your bones.
[01:09:44]  It's not your body's not stuck at this set point.
[01:09:48]  You can lose the weight.
[01:09:49]  You can do anything that you want.
[01:09:50]  Like you can, you can look better.
[01:09:52]  It's just people, people quit too early on because they just don't know what they're doing.
[01:09:58]  Okay, cool.
[01:09:59]  And all the advice out there.
[01:10:02]  Well, thanks for coming on, Amanda.
[01:10:04]  Come back anytime.
[01:10:05]  So is that all your questions?
[01:10:08]  It was right.
[01:10:09]  Yeah.
[01:10:10]  Keep fighting with the good fight out there because, you know, once again, men, we get called fat.
[01:10:16]  Well, Pearl was talking about the word loser.
[01:10:19]  And when you hear the word loser, you automatically picture a man in his mom's basement eating Cheetos and drinking Mountain Dew.
[01:10:27]  But we don't, we haven't, there's no female equivalent for the word loser.
[01:10:33]  And there needs to be.
[01:10:34]  You know what I'm saying?
[01:10:36]  And so you're fighting the good fight and helping reverse this social infrastructure that's in place to just make women be okay with being unhealthy and just being mediocre.
[01:10:46]  So thank you for all that you're doing.
[01:10:47]  We really appreciate it.
[01:10:49]  Yeah, I'll keep spewing all the info out there.
[01:10:52]  I hope I don't get beyond, but for now we're good.
[01:10:55]  Thanks for coming, Amanda.
[01:10:57]  Guys, make sure you go follow her on Instagram, TikTok.
[01:11:01]  It's Amanda underscore Dobler.
[01:11:03]  Are you on YouTube, actually?
[01:11:04]  I don't know if I saw it.
[01:11:05]  No, but I need to get on it.
[01:11:07]  That's what I'm being told.
[01:11:08]  So maybe, maybe tomorrow, maybe you've kickstarted me.
[01:11:11]  Cool.
[01:11:12]  Cool.
[01:11:13]  I hope you do.
[01:11:13]  All right.
[01:11:14]  Thanks for coming.
[01:11:15]  You.
[01:11:15]  All right.
[01:11:16]  Thank you both.
[01:11:16]  Bye.
[01:11:19]  What a beast.
[01:11:20]  Yeah, she's goaded.
[01:11:22]  We decloned clone her like a hundred times.
[01:11:25]  That's what I'm talking about.
[01:11:26]  And I told you the fact that she says she doesn't have to sugarcoat her words with women because I was going back and forth with someone in the chat.
[01:11:33]  Oh, you have to, it's a case-by-case basis, and women won't listen.
[01:11:36]  It's like, no, there's a crisis with women and health.
[01:11:41]  Well, in America, period, but like now more than ever, you know?
[01:11:46]  So, yeah, what a great guest.
[01:11:48]  That's awesome.
[01:11:49]  Yeah, I thought you'd like her.
[01:11:51]  Yeah, okay.
[01:11:52]  Well, that's what I got today.
[01:11:54]  Do you got any other thoughts on the topic, Doug MPA?
[01:11:58]  Yeah, guys, we got to do better when it comes to banging fat chicks in whales, guys.
[01:12:03]  Come on now.
[01:12:04]  Come on.
[01:12:05]  Yeah, black men, you guys are single-handedly pushing this obesity epidemic.
[01:12:09]  So we yeah, yeah, all you trainers and all you guys are banging weight.
[01:12:16]  Yeah, you know, I'm telling you.
[01:12:18]  And so, and I'm sorry, guys, I'm glad that Pearl's pointing it out.
[01:12:24]  I mean, I'm black.
[01:12:25]  I co-sign on her mess 100%.
[01:12:28]  We have to do better.
[01:12:28]  And I'm hoping in my life we're able to see it.
[01:12:30]  And like I said before, Amanda wasn't going to say, but she knew exactly what was going on.
[01:12:41]  Yeah, she knew exactly.
[01:12:43]  Yeah, but she's, don't, don't put that on her.
[01:12:46]  You know what I mean?
[01:12:47]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:12:49]  The views of the show do not directly reflect the views of the guests that come on the show.
[01:12:56]  All right.
[01:12:57]  Well, all right.
[01:12:57]  Thanks for coming up, Doug MPA.
[01:12:59]  You had really great questions today.
[01:13:00]  So thanks for coming.
[01:13:02]  Yeah.
[01:13:03]  Always a pleasure.
[01:13:05]  All right.
[01:13:05]  Yeah, black men prop up the sub file.
[01:13:07]  Yeah, see, there's another black guy.
[01:13:08]  You guys know, because you guys, do you guys not tell your boys to like, what are you doing?
[01:13:13]  Do you guys not, do you guys not say to your boys, like, why are, what are you doing?
[01:13:21]  What are you doing?
[01:13:22]  You know, anyways.
[01:13:24]  All right, guys.
[01:13:26]  I'm actually, I'm going to actually listen.
[01:13:30]  She's, I forgot what she, protein powder.
[01:13:33]  I'm going to start weighing my protein powder after this show.
[01:13:36]  Anyways, guys, like the video.
[01:13:37]  Please subscribe to the channel.
[01:13:39]  I love you guys.
[01:13:39]  and I'll see you next time.