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March 15, 2020 - No Agenda
03:00:38
1225: Toilet Preppers
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Time Text
Clean out your bong water, people.
Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
It's Sunday, March 15th, 2020.
This is your award-winning Gitmo Nation Media Assassination, episode 1225.
This is no agenda.
Beware the Ides of March.
And broadcasting live from Opportunity Zone 33 here in the frontier of Austin, Texas, capital of the drone star state.
In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
And from northern Silicon Valley, where the freeways are deserted, I'm John C. Dvorak.
Crackpot and Buzzkill.
In the morning.
I admit, I'm loving the traffic sitch.
Yes.
The traffic sitch is da best.
It's pretty good.
Wow.
Hey, so we were talking on Thursday how we were so surprised about all this panic shopping.
I hadn't seen it.
You hadn't seen it.
But I guess none of that happened until after the president's disastrous Wednesday evening performance, which apparently was written by Jared Kushner.
Well, that explains a little bit.
It explains a lot.
He was awkward trying to read it, but I don't believe this is true.
That it was written by Jared?
No, about this happening after the announcements.
Well, everything started to sell out here.
Do you have a time stamp on when he did it?
No, Thursday.
Well, he did it Wednesday evening, and then Thursday...
Okay, well, the national emergency was called on Friday.
No, I know.
I know.
But the nutso buying of products, because I went out shopping Friday, and here in Austin as well, I ran into empty shelves.
So, you know, I think right after the president did that crappy D- performance, that's when people went, and then the stock market was dropping.
So I think that's what happened.
Well, it dropped and it went up.
No, we're talking about Thursday.
Thursday.
Friday.
Friday it skyrocketed, of course!
So we have the...
So we had here a...
And I'd gone to the store the day before, and it was after Trump's thing, but it wasn't...
It didn't seem to be the disaster it was on Friday.
Now, on Friday, we had...
And this was reported in the news...
The traffic is backed up on the freeway.
Like, backed up on the freeway for as far as I can see.
And I thought it was a wreck.
Oh, it's a wreck.
It's a wreck.
Somebody wrecked.
No, and it turned out that that traffic was backed up for the purpose of going to Costco.
Yes, we had the same at some of our Costcos.
But on Friday, not...
Why Costco?
What has Costco done to the public?
Did they hypnotize people?
No.
Well, first of all, Costco has big carts, which makes you feel good and powerful, because we're going to get lots of stuff.
I went to the supermarket, and indeed, we had no paper products, no cleaning products, no frozen food, lots of fresh produce, low on potatoes, but I was in line for about an hour, and I just looked at what everyone was buying.
John...
Two things.
One, this was around 2 o'clock Austin time, so people were on their phones watching the president in the Rose Garden.
This was kind of surreal.
Whoa, yeah, the president's talking.
All right, all right.
Yeah, he's doing...
This is how people...
You hear, yeah, he's doing the State of the Union.
Yeah.
This is the...
That's when I realized, oh, Curry, you're way too deep.
You know way too much about this stuff.
This is the level that people understand.
He's doing a State of the Union.
Okay.
But they have 15 bags of chips, five boxes of elite brand mac and cheese.
It's just like all these...
No can...
No tuna fish.
Normally, they can't sell the tuna fish.
And the only thing that was left was, you know, colorful boxes that looked like they might be Asian that contained some tuna fish can or something.
But the great toilet paper scare is a fractal.
This is a fractal of 1973.
And I was living in the Netherlands, so I don't recall it, but maybe you do.
In 73, people started to freak out and buy toilet paper because Johnny Carson cracked a joke about it on The Tonight Show.
Actually, I read the same article.
It predated that.
Carson cracked a joke because it was in the newspaper, wasn't it?
It was in the newspaper, yes.
Somebody had announced, and I don't know where, by the way, and I just read this, and to kind of Answer your earlier question that I might remember this.
I don't remember this, but okay.
I don't even know that it happened.
But maybe that's where my mom's thing came from.
It might have started right there.
And that's the first thing I was thinking of.
1973, that would be a time when your mom might have said, whoa, the Chinese!
And it was a Chinese thing, wasn't it?
Or Japanese.
It was a Japanese shortage, I think.
Well, there's a shortage somewhere, and then Carson made some comment, and then it was all over.
It became, according to the same article, or one of the articles that you read, It became like a big thing.
I don't know if it is a fractal of that, but I don't know what the triggering mechanism is.
Here's the fractal.
We go to Stephen Colbert.
Procter& Gamble says 17,600 products could be affected by coronavirus in China.
Over 17,000 products including Charmin, Dawn, Bounty, and Crest toothpaste.
So get ready to start brushing your teeth with a hygiene product still made in America.
Jack Daniels.
It's possible that he may have kicked that off.
That was the beginning of the week.
Maybe.
It's possible.
Something kicked it off, but the mania about it is laughable.
Yes.
It's not laughable, it's sad.
It shows you how dysfunctional people are.
Minimally.
And the thing is, nobody's ever even thought to stop manufacturing toilet paper.
And as I've mentioned, when we talk about toilet paper, which we apparently do once a year or so, because I've talked about Z, the brand Z. And since I get some toilet paper from Grocery Outlet, mainly because...
There goes the Zephyr.
Let's go.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...
Eight.
Economy stable.
All things normal.
We're good to go.
No, no.
It should be nine.
Oh, I thought...
Oh, you're right.
Nine is normal.
We are short.
Economy down.
Only eight cars on the Zephyr.
Now, so I realize by doing that, buying at this place...
There are probably a hundred separate brands of toilet paper.
And I don't know how many come in from China, which seems unlikely, because it's kind of a stupid thing to do.
But there's a lot of different brands.
Nobody is stopping the manufacturing of toilet paper anytime soon if there's not a glut on the market.
So the people who went out and bought bushel baskets full of toilet paper, it's just...
It's beyond comprehension.
I think there's an op going on.
Well, before we get to ops, let's listen to our Secretary of the Treasury and fellow Tourette Sufferer, although he's much better at suppressing it, Stephen Mnuchin.
Only recently.
I know, but I've got to get his tips.
I've got to figure out what he's doing.
I think he's being injected.
He still has it.
I can see it.
When a question comes, he moves his head and his neck a certain way, and of course I recognize what that is.
It's a stifled tick.
But he's good at it, and he weighed in, of course, on the economy, and very interesting, as we kind of thought this buying would affect the overall economy, and it has.
There's an area of the economies that have been hurt very hard immediately.
There's area of the economy, this is the best thing that ever has occurred.
So, as you said, people are shopping.
From the data I have from the credit card companies, what we've seen is, although travel spending is way down, spending on supplies, food, medical, pharmacy has almost offset that in the short term.
And again, any supply chain issues, the task force is focused on and will be dealing with.
Don't see that as a major problem at the moment.
I think, as you know, people were concerned about China.
China's opened back up.
China opened for business.
And thank you for helping the economy.
The overall economy, of course, because...
It's starting to hurt.
Have you noticed this?
I don't know if it's the same with you.
I'm getting emails and texts and calls from lots of friends and families.
Like, I'm some oracle now.
It's like, hey, what's going on?
Do you know what's happening?
The kid came home from school saying, heard that China created this to kill us all.
So this is what's happening with 11, 12-year-old kids.
They're hearing this at school.
So everybody needs to feel somewhat better, I guess.
We're not reassuring anything at school around here.
School's been closed.
Yes, and I have family in Italy, in Firenze, Willow, and everything is...
They're not freaked out at all.
Of course, her husband, who's an entertainer, will have no work for...
He's had no work for two weeks, so probably another four more.
Because he's a comedian and he performs in public, so that's done.
And it's just kind of a ghost town.
It's like people just aren't really going out except to go to the grocery store or farmacia or if you need to drive to work.
Restaurants and bars curfewed.
Tiffany in the Netherlands and Christina, of course, in Rotterdam.
Rotterdam is really completely shut down.
And they're expecting curfew to be installed by this weekend, so they say.
Or this coming weekend.
Maybe even sooner.
And the shelves there, the panic is real in the lowlands.
People are flipping out.
And they're just buying anything.
Buying the shelves.
Can I buy the shelf?
I might need a shelf.
Give me the shelf.
I want the shelf.
Buy the shelf.
And, you know, there's no one calming anybody down.
There's no one doing any good work.
Actually, I thought, I don't know if you saw the whole Rose Garden spiel by the president.
As bad as the Wednesday night was, I gave this a solid A. Finally, finally, he does what he's good at, doesn't use the prompter, comes out with his...
Kind of people.
The CEO from Walmart, from Target, from Walgreens.
What am I missing there?
CVS. He's got all the big guys.
Hey, Don, come over here.
Okay, Pete, you got this under control.
And he had it together.
Finally.
And he was also not taking any shit from the reporters if someone just kept...
It's ramming on about, did you take a test?
Have you been tested?
Then he just had the mic taken away from him, but didn't do his typical, shut up your fake news.
The best, though, which you didn't see on your evening news, because why would you?
We were too obsessed with claiming the president lied.
Google isn't doing anything.
Google isn't building a website.
By the way, how about the president giving a shout-out for Google?
Yeah, we just had Google build a website, which we'll see.
Slips in a little political bull crap, which hasn't happened with every website launched by the government.
Okay, that was unnecessary.
I hate it when he does that.
But then he brought on...
The problem is he does it too much now.
He doesn't need to do it anymore.
He doesn't need to.
So he brought on Deborah Birx, B-R-I-X. Birx, I'm sorry, B-I-R-X. She's a State Department Ambassador-at-Large, and she was in government starting with the Bush administration, PEPFAR. She is the, I'll just call her the AIDS czar, as she has shepherded that throughout the Bush administration, Bush 2, through Obama, and still on board with the Trump administration.
And she laid out, it's a little bit longer clip, three minutes, but she lays out exactly what happened, exactly, because all we've heard is, we've got no kids, we're not testing, Trump is killing us!
Oh wait, I should actually play the Lawrence O'Donnell clip.
Let me see, where is that douchebag?
Here we go.
This is Lawrence O'Donnell, this is your mainstream media.
More people are sick in America tonight because Donald Trump is We feel really horrible now.
So, Birx comes out, and I think she explains it incredibly well.
She even addresses the fact that it may have been confusing for the press and for people at home, and she has actual credibility.
And in the AIDS days, in the heyday of the AIDS, although we've learned that AIDS still kills 2,000 people a day worldwide, She was always up front and center.
She's very well respected.
And of course, that's why no one talks to her.
No one interviews her.
They don't even put this segment on television.
But I think this really tells you what is going on and where we're at.
Dr.
Birx, please.
Thank you, Mr.
President.
It's a pleasure to be here with all of you.
I think you know at the beginning of this epidemic, HHS through CDC proactively developed an assay built on the existing flu surveillance system.
That surveillance system was then converted to diagnostic system.
But last Tuesday, seeing the spread of the virus around the globe, the President realized that our current approach to testing was inadequate to meet the needs of the American public.
He asked for an entire overhaul of the testing approach.
He immediately called the private sector laboratories to the White House, as noted, and charged them with developing a high-throughput quality platform that can meet the needs of the American public.
We are grateful to LabCorp and Quest for taking up the charge immediately after the meeting, and within 72 hours, bringing additional testing access, particularly to the outbreak areas of Washington State and California, and now across the country.
We are also very grateful to the universities and large hospital systems that took up the charge to develop their own quality tests made available by new FDA guidance.
This has resulted in expanded testing across New York, California, Washington, Colorado, and you see sometimes those drive-through options that have been made available through these high-throughput options.
Following the meeting last week, major commercial laboratory equipment and diagnostic companies took immediate action to adopt and develop new testing systems.
Last night, the initial company, Roche, received FDA approval, moving from request to development to approval in record time.
In less than two weeks together, we have developed a solution that we believe will meet the future testing needs of Americans.
I understand how difficult this has been.
I was part of the HIV-AIDS response in the 80s.
We knew from first finding cases in 1981, it took us to almost 1985 to have a test.
It took us another 11 years to have effective therapy.
It is because of the lessons learned from that that we were able to mobilize and bring those individuals that were key to the HIV response to this response.
I understand that a lot of this behind-the-scenes action over the last couple of weeks was invisible to the press and the American people.
But this intense effort has not only resulted in innovative solutions, but an automated, high-throughput system bringing the availability of these quality coronaviral testing to the American people at unprecedented speed.
Finally, I want you to know in South Korea, they did have a large number of tests available over the last several weeks.
Their positivity rate is between 3 and 4%.
With LabCorp and Quest expanded testing, their positivity rate is between 1 and 2%.
So we want to also announce this new approach to testing, which will start in the screening website up here, facilitated by Google, where clients and patients and people of interest can go, fill out a screening questionnaire, move down for symptoms or risk factors, yes, They would move down this and be told where the drive-through options would be for them to receive this test.
The labs will then move to the high-throughput automated machines to be able to provide results in 24 to 36 hours.
That is the intent of this approach we have seen at work just in our own United States, and we want to bring this across the continent.
Thank you very much.
So a couple of things we learned.
I think none of this was reported except for that Google is going to build the website, which I even see the troll room people believe that that's not true.
Google, of course, came out and said, yes, we are doing that.
It's through one of our companies that they acquired, and we have Google engineers who have volunteered to get this up and going by Sunday.
But that's what the press focused on.
Well, actually, they focused on something else in addition to that.
If he was tested or not.
Well, oh, I forgot that one.
Three things!
On to number three.
This is Trump slamming, slamming Yanis Alcindor.
PBS really played this up, but all the other places did too.
Saying that her question was nasty.
And so he's a racist.
Oh, of course.
It's Yamiche.
Of course he's a racist.
We know.
Because he's used the word nasty.
And on PBS, the NewsHour, and I don't know when this started because reporters aren't supposed to be part of the news, but the news crews nowadays on the various networks, the big networks, They put the camera on the reporter.
Usually their reporter.
Their reporter asking the question.
So they had the camera on Yamiche.
And she's asking the question.
You shut down the pandemic unit.
And it's the reason we're so far behind.
How do you explain yourself?
Did they have an answer for that?
Because I've looked into it.
And I know exactly what happened.
Well, you can tell us what happened after I tell you what the president said.
He kind of passed it off saying, you know, these other people have done things.
It's got nothing really.
I know what you're blaming me for.
And that was a nasty question because it was it was a nasty question in terms of just an ambush question.
And that became the big news.
Right.
So what actually happened is, it was John Bolton that reorganized that.
Yes, Bolton was blamed.
He mentioned Bolton.
Yeah.
But what happened was, Pandemic was replaced with the chemical and bioweapon team.
So it was a replacement, upgrading it, in my mind, to something much better.
And in 2018, the same time frame, the documents in the show notes, you can see the entire layout for the bioweapon team that replaces the pandemic team.
And that sounds like something Bolton would do.
That makes a lot of sense.
But what we're hearing now from Dr.
Birx is the entire system was not set up for this type of testing.
And also people really have some kind of fantasy about, you know, you just swab your cheek and you're good to go and you beep, you get a green light or a red light.
You know, it's not like a 23andMe DNA test spitting the tube.
Well, it is actually.
It comes back faster than the 23andMe.
But it's not an immediate test.
And apparently, it took a little while to get the test to be right.
Which, of course, is just an outrage and people have died because of this.
But the CDC failed.
And Trump did something very interesting.
He went something almost straight from a socialist playbook.
Actually, you've got to keep your eye on it.
He said, alright, let's bring in everybody else.
And he said, and in Europe...
The word is, oh my God, only in America would they come up with a genius idea of a drive-thru testing.
You have to understand, this is unique to the United States.
Drive-thru hamburgers was a big deal in the 70s when we heard about it over in Europe.
So we look like the coolest people in the world.
We're going to do that in a drive-through format.
And that's really an important thing because you don't want to fill up the doctor's offices, hospitals, and ERs with people wanting a test.
Yeah, the drive-through is a great idea.
That's genius.
But I don't know if they still have this in Texas, but they used to have drive-through liquor stores and beer vendors.
I don't know of any.
Especially around this part.
Yeah, around these parts, you know, we have Sunday, you can't even sell liquor, so I'm sure it's weird.
But I was encouraged by hearing that, and also, hey, South Korea, remember we talked about these numbers would probably be the numbers that would matter, and sure they had tests, but their tests gave worse results than our tests.
Could our tests be fixed, rigged, bugged, whatever?
I don't know.
I don't think so.
So the test is getting better.
It could be bad.
Flattening the curve, though.
I think we kind of nailed that one.
I heard that over and over this past week.
Flatten the curve.
We've got to flatten the curve.
And it's kind of expected and predicted.
People have started to hunker down a bit.
I think it's gone a bit too far.
But retail is cutting hours.
Restaurants.
I mean, we went out to a restaurant last night.
It was pretty much empty.
Although other ones were full.
I think it's kind of hit and miss, but just trying to keep the economy going.
And one other thing from this Rose Garden speech kind of set me on a path of looking at a couple of things, and I want to discuss that.
Here's what the president said about the virus.
Americans are the strongest and most resilient people on earth.
And in the coming weeks, we will all have to make changes and sacrifices, but these short-term sacrifices will produce long-term gain.
And again, I've said we're learning a lot for the future and future problems like this, or worse, or worse.
It could get worse.
The next eight weeks are critical.
We can learn and we will turn a corner on this virus.
Some of the doctors say it will wash through, it will flow through.
Interesting terms.
And very accurate, I think you're going to find in a number of weeks it's going to be a very accurate term.
Alright, so when Trump says these things, I pay attention.
When he says, look, eight weeks, he's putting real numbers out there.
I didn't see this clip played anywhere either.
Eight weeks, and they say, look, a number of doctors say it's going to wash over.
It could be just a couple of weeks.
That's what the doctors say.
That could turn out to be pretty accurate.
You're going to see.
I mean, he couldn't message it any stronger.
And I was looking around at the, you know, because, of course, this comparison between influenza and what it does and how many victims it takes every year versus the coronavirus, the symptoms, etc., And it's very hard to go back and find stuff in any of the search engines.
Google is useless, actually, if you want to find something from even a few months ago that contained the terms influenza or sick or anything like that.
And the first one I hit was Time Magazine from January 16th.
And this was a weird flu season, it turns out.
And Time the Rag says, flu season is always unpredictable.
Different viral strains circulate each year, which makes forecasting the diseases spread and formulating the annual flu vaccine an educated guessing game.
Even so, the 2019-2020 flu season has been particularly unusual.
Influenza B, the viral strain that usually circulates toward the end of flu season, instead emerged first this year, shifting usual transmission patterns.
A vaccine mismatch and reduced immunity to influenza B may have contributed to the early and severe start of this flu season.
But what all articles say, including this one, is that it would be milder than other years ago, The CDC itself, and see what is the date of this publication, they published what to expect for the 2019-2020 flu season.
And this page was last reviewed on March 13th, so it's still accurate.
And let's just look at the numbers for a moment.
CDC estimates that from October 1st, 2019, remember it started early this flu season, through March 7th, 2020, there have been, so not there will be, there have been, 36 million to 51 million flu illnesses,
17 million to 24 million flu medical visits, 370,000 to 670,000 flu hospitalizations, and my favorite, 22,000 to 55,000 flu deaths.
So this has happened in this period that we are just looking back on.
These numbers could have easily been reported as something incredibly scary, 22,000 to 55,000 deaths.
I mean, those are scary numbers if you hype it up the way this has been going.
But it hasn't.
But what we do see, if you go back to January, now January 23rd is when the news first started reporting it here in the U.S. seriously with deaths in China.
In that month, and I remembered it because of my daughter, I had something in December, but if you go back and look in timelines, people's timelines on Twitter or just any friends, you'll see that they had, a lot of them had flu-like symptoms, felt like crap, went to the doctor, diagnosed with influenza, but did not test positive with an influenza test, told to go home, took about 10 days and they felt better.
I have a feeling, personally, listening to the messaging from the President and looking at the numbers, that this thing has already washed through us.
And the only reason why it appears to be building is because we're testing.
We're testing.
So, oh my God, you can't tell me that we only have these cases now after this was already killing people in January.
We have direct flights from Wuhan to Toledo, Ohio.
Interestingly enough, 100,000 cases predicted to be in Toledo, Ohio.
Why?
Well, there's a million Chinese coming back and forth all year with all the factories.
That's what American Factory, the Obama documentary, is about, about that exact area in Ohio.
So my feeling is the symptoms, yeah, of course it's going to kill people just like the flu.
You've got the numbers.
I think people have already had it.
I think it may have come and gone.
It just looks like it's incredibly bad because the numbers are now starting to come in from testing.
We probably have 30, 40, 50 million people infected.
Most have no symptoms.
Some get some symptoms.
Some people died like the flu.
We have to remember that the coronavirus is, alongside of rhinovirus, is the cause of the common cold.
Thank you.
That seems to have been lost in the shuffle.
Well, and so back to your op.
Yes, I think this is an op from multiple, multiple angles.
This is financial.
I mean, the money that must be made right now in the markets.
For some, it must be astronomical.
If you know what you're doing, you've got to be cleaning up.
And we've got to have acquisitions coming soon.
There are companies down to a buck.
Nokia.
Nokia is like a buck and a half.
You can buy a share of Nokia.
It was already on the acquisition block.
So there's all kinds of stuff that's going on there.
Control is my fear.
We see now in Israel, they have an app encouraging all citizens to download the app where you report, and of course it tracks you, and they're very open about it.
It tracks you, so that you can say, okay, either I'm in quarantine, I've had it, I have it, you know, you show up on the map, and if you're walking around somewhere in Israel, and you are virus-free, and you come in proximity of someone who might have it, you know, your phone's going to Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Careful!
Citizen, warning!
Will Robinson, danger!
So there's a lot of tracking that will be put into place.
This is the surveillance, the way they speak about it.
Who knows what else will come of this, but this is the never let a crisis go to waste moment, and I think we're going to, only when this subsides a bit will we find out exactly what has been put in place.
There are things we could talk about the Green New Deal in Europe in a minute, but I just cannot see this as the panic driven crisis that is being explained to us.
And, you know, I like Dr. Drew and he's trying to sound the same bell, I guess, hit the same message.
Here he is on CBS.
So you've seen pandemics over the decades.
How does this one compare with everything?
The bad flu season is 80,000 dead.
We've got about 18,000 dead from influenza this year.
We have 100 from corona.
Which should you be worried about, influenza or corona?
100 versus 18,000.
It's not a trick question.
And look, everything that's going on with New York cleaning the subways and everyone using Clorox wipes and get your flu shot, which should be the other message, that's good.
That's a good thing.
So I have no problem with the behaviors.
What I have a problem with is the panic and the fact that businesses are getting destroyed and people's lives are being upended, not by the virus, but by the panic.
The panic must stop.
And the press, they really somehow need to be held accountable because they are hurting people.
And I can just see it the way the innuendo and every opportunity for drama by the press was twisted in that direction.
Let me give you an example.
So the World Health Organization is out now saying the fatality rate from the virus is 3.4%, right?
Every publication from the WHO says 3.4%, and we expect it to fall dramatically once we understand the full extent of the illness.
No one ever reports the actual statement.
We got 3.4%.
That's ten times more than the, whatever, five times more than the flu virus.
And, yeah, it's going to be a little more flu, probably.
So, Dr.
Drew trying to bring some sanity.
I don't know if people trust him anymore.
Do you think they still have some trust in Dr.
Drew?
No, nobody cares.
They just thought they got to worry about the toilet paper.
Let me just go back to that comment of his about the press.
I have some clips.
I have a second one from him about the press, and then one play that real quick, and then we'll hear yours.
Sure.
I think it was a concerted effort by the press to capture your eyes, and in doing so, they did it by inducing panic.
Listen, the CDC and the WHO, they know what they're doing.
They contain pandemics.
That's how they know how to do it.
They're doing an amazing job.
Amazing.
Listen to them.
What about the global implications of this?
Because we were talking off-camera about Italy, there's China as well.
Yeah, there's some little outbreaks where you should avoid.
Right.
There are.
I would look out where the flu's out-breaking bad, too.
I ended up getting the bird flu.
I got H1N1. Oh, really?
And it was horrible.
It was no fun.
How long did you have that?
Well, that was 10 years ago, and I was really sick for about two weeks.
Wow.
I was really sick.
And no fun.
No fun.
Were you talking about bird flu like you're talking about coronavirus?
All right, that's no longer about the press.
Okay.
First of all, Saturday's PBS news hour with Sri Surferi, his name, it's a half hour on Saturdays.
It started about Corona.
It ended with Corona.
It was an entire show.
Corona?
Corona?
Yeah, I'm sure.
So the National on Friday, which is Canada's top news show.
It's their CBC's news hour.
It's an hour.
It was one whole hour of reporting about Corona in one way or another.
There was nothing else.
There was not one single other story for the entire Friday hour of the national.
And what makes you think this is some kind of an operation?
Why would you even consider that?
Now, but I did get some clips from Canada which are kind of interesting.
Mainly because there's one fractal in there.
But the Canadians, they're panicky.
And you have to realize that it was...
Well, play this first clip.
This is the no travel clip number one.
Intro, no travel.
Oh, okay, I see what you're saying.
COVID-19's impact on Canada is getting wider.
The number of cases nearly 200 so far, and its impact on our lives, our communities, and our work is already massive.
The concern now that this outbreak in this country has only begun.
I know that you're worried.
You're worried about your health, about your family's health.
No.
About your job, your savings, about paying rent.
How about the kids not being in school?
After a week of chaos from the stock market to supermarkets, the federal government says help is coming, but also advises Canadians not to leave the country unless absolutely necessary.
200!
Yeah, well, let's get real.
193.
Oh, he was exaggerating.
What a Trump move.
If you listen carefully, he says almost 200.
Oh, okay.
As an aside, just came out today, the UK police will have power to arrest people.
If you're...
What?
If you are on the street and you are a virus carrier...
Do you remember the Lisbon Treaty?
This is one of the things that, now, out of the EU, the EU-Lisbon Treaty, if you recall, one of the things that actually got me started on the path of eventually winding up talking to you about this stuff, which led to the show, was the protocols to the Lisbon Treaty, which said authorities was the protocols to the Lisbon Treaty, which said authorities in the EU or the EU authorities will have the power to arrest people and detain them if they have communicable diseases.
which was not even defined.
And I think we might have even joked on the show that, oh, you got the cold, bless you, I'm arresting you.
Now these things are going to come back to people all of a sudden.
That's a good one.
Not if you're in the EU, it's not.
Now, here's an intro.
Play clip to the second part of that clip.
Tonight we'll look at Ottawa's plan to control the spread of the virus and to support the economy, including the growing list of restrictions and cancellations and how panic is making a hard situation even harder, from grocery stores to diagnostic testing.
Considering how quickly things are changing, many of you are on edge and have lots of questions.
Well, today we got some answers and warnings today from the federal government.
David Cochran begins our coverage from Ottawa.
The Prime Minister is fighting this virus on three fronts.
His family's health, the health of Canadians, and the health of the Canadian economy.
We will be supporting the economy and Canadians through this time.
Because his wife tested positive, Trudeau will work from isolation as his government tries to stop the contagion.
Today my advice is to postpone or cancel all non-essential travel outside of Canada.
No Canadians should leave the country while the government will limit the ways travelers can enter the country.
International arrivals from certain regions will land only at a few specified airports.
This will enable us to concentrate our precious resources for our border services officers and for our public health officers.
Cruise ships are banned until at least July.
They won't be allowed to go to the Arctic at all because of the lack of health facilities in the north.
The border, however, stays open, as evidence shows a border shutdown doesn't work.
I think what we have to remember is that viruses don't know borders.
A border is not going to contain the virus.
Parliament, though, is closed until late April.
MPs of all parties not wanting to be part of the problem when they visit their riding.
This globalist piece of crap...
Borders don't stop viruses.
Yeah, if you stop the flights, they do.
If you stop people from walking across them, it certainly helps.
Am I nuts?
Or am I just not a globalist?
You're not a globalist.
Brother.
Well, I mean, they want nobody to leave the country, and they want to...
Well, you know, you put me on the path, man.
When you got that John Hopkins, who actually ran the Event 201 pandemic exercise, that guy is now the expert and talking to God knows whoever within the media.
But their paper, as you explained it, their result, What has to happen when we eventually hit this pandemic, which we just hit, is more globalism.
We have to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.
Everybody has to do it all together.
It's the opposite of what people actually want to do, is shut down, hunker down, and go away, evil man.
They tell you it's shut down.
So Canada's got the hoarding.
Before I go to the hoarding in Canada, which is exactly the same as it is here.
Yeah, the same in the Netherlands.
Toilet paper?
Everything.
Is it toilet paper in the Netherlands too?
John, they're buying the actual shelves.
Here's the fractal.
This is the non-testing of Trudeau.
Listen to this.
Oh, okay.
Oops, hold on a sec.
Now, while the Prime Minister today said he feels fine, he also said he has no plans to be tested for COVID-19, which has many people asking, why not?
Yeah, suspicious!
Trudeau says his doctor is actually advised against testing since he is showing no symptoms.
And as Health Minister, Patty Hajdu, pointed out a little later, that is the normal protocol.
There is no evidence that someone needs to self-isolate if in fact they have been in contact with someone who is asymptomatic.
And so it's important to remember that.
That is why the Prime Minister has received that public health advice that he doesn't have to have a test.
Haidu also said the Prime Minister's wife, Sophie, will be extensively interviewed as health officials attempt to trace everyone she has been in contact with.
So Sophie Scott got tested positive, which is a little different than Trump.
Trump was hounded for the same exact reasons and at first used the same exact excuse, which, well, my doctor says I didn't need it, which is what Trudeau's doing.
But Trudeau, you'd think, might be a little more inclined.
Trump finally gave in, got tested, turned out to be fine, and Trudeau's going to have to do the same thing.
But I just thought it was curious that both these guys...
It kind of went by the exact same playbook.
Unknown to each other, I'm sure.
Well, I know why Trump didn't want to do it.
The 25th Amendment.
Oh, sick.
All right.
Boom.
Move in.
President's no good.
It's gone to his brain.
Oh, they'd have him out so quick, your head would spin.
And Pence would probably...
How can we have a president who's infected?
And Pence would be right there.
Pence, by the way, is like...
Dude, I'm looking pretty good here.
I'm getting some props.
He looks just like the guy who plays him on SNL. It's uncanny.
And Pence is looking pretty presidential.
Oh, yeah.
We might have to.
We could deal with him.
Could do that.
Okay, now play.
This is another thing they're doing up in Canada.
They're shutting down, which is what they should do everywhere.
They're shutting down the government for all practical purposes.
This is the killing legislative sessions clip.
The impacts of COVID-19 are also stretching to more than 50,000 employees of the Ontario Public Service.
The province has asked employees to work from home beginning on Monday until...
April 3rd if feasible.
This follows a vote at Queen's Park to suspend the spring legislative session temporarily.
The Tories are also determining whether to postpone the March 25th budget.
Yeah, Jim Oak should go home anyway.
By the way, 193 cases in the entire country and they've gone completely nuts.
There's a term for this that's going on, which I had heard before.
I kind of ignored it because I saw a lot of people posting and like, whatever.
It's the, what do you call this?
You call this the Dunning-Kruger effect?
Are you familiar with the Dunning-Kruger effect?
No, I am now.
It's something called the Dunning-Kruger effect.
What's that?
The Dunning-Kruger effect is a couple of psychologists, Dr.
Dunning and Dr.
Kruger, realize that there's a cognitive distortion for people that...
We don't really know the landscape of a particular topic.
It's what allows people to get up on American Idol and sing and sound like hell and go, don't I sound great?
They don't know good singing.
They're not exposed to it.
And the same thing is true in many areas of science.
And so right now, everybody thinks they're an expert on everything.
They're not.
That is Dunning-Kruger.
People that are real experts feel like imposters, which is the opposite of Dunning-Kruger, because you realize how fast the topic is, how complicated it is, so you never feel like you know enough.
But in social media, Danny Kruger is alive and well.
Yes.
And that's part of the problem.
Oh, my gosh.
I'll say this, that the people that listen to this show aren't the ones getting the toilet paper.
I can assure you there's probably very...
I mean, it's not that somebody in the family is not doing it.
But I don't see anybody.
I didn't run out and get a bunch of toilet paper.
We got toilet paper.
It lasts, I don't know, weeks worth of toilet paper.
How much do you need?
And they keep restocking it.
It's not as though the stuff is going to disappear forever.
There's always tissues you can buy.
Nobody buys the Kleenex.
Let me get my last Canadian clip on it.
This is just so we get some perspective on the hoarding.
You already gave it in Holland, and this is the Canadian version.
While some public places have been thinning out, grocery stores are jammed with customers.
They're loading up with supplies to make sure they don't run out.
And in the process, emptying the shelves.
Tom Staglow went to find out what's fueling this panic.
On a quick trip for essentials, good luck.
Consider this coronavirus-fueled panic buying.
Empty shelves, lineups that keep going and going and going.
Not to mention a tight squeeze in that crowd, even as public health experts urge everyone to avoid contact.
Yeah, it seems a lot of little bonkers in there now today.
There's lots of people, and more than normal, even on their busiest day.
Some people with like five, six packages of toilet paper.
Indeed, with so many users sharing pictures online showing toilet paper shelves empty, unfounded fears of a shortage run rampant.
Toilet paper isn't the only thing running low in some stores, like non-perishable food items, tomato sauce, and pasta in this store.
It's nearly all gone.
But stores are restocking every day and officials across the country promise right now all trucks are delivering goods and we don't expect any shortage.
So what's driving the panic?
This medical anthropologist blames the fear of a mysterious virus and the need to do something to help.
Hoarding behaviors in the context of an outbreak are not helpful.
Problem is, overbuying prevents others from grabbing their own supplies.
But it gets worse, like those reselling cleaning wipes online at outrageous prices.
I'm profoundly disappointed in people who are hoarding and then selling online.
I think that's just offensive.
You see that guy who the New York Times did a piece on?
No.
He had 17,000 bottles of hand sanitizer, and he was price-gouging them on eBay, and then eBay blocked him, and now he can't sell any, and he's crying about it.
My Purell has been blocked.
Just telling you, but Tito's Vodka is the answer.
So...
There's a Slate article that was written showing they did some documentation of what people actually are grabbing off the shelves, but more interesting, what they're leaving.
For example, the meat counters are all emptied out in some places, but the pork products were left.
The thinking is the pork is thought of Swine flu and Chinese and pork.
Of course.
All the vegan stuff is there.
If you're a vegan, you don't have to worry.
It's not actually food, so of course it's still there.
Nobody's buying any of it.
There's a rack of meat that's all missing except beyond meat.
That's all there.
Oh, no one's buying the Beyond?
No, no one's buying the Beyond.
Which is a sign for you investors out there.
Yes, get bail.
Bail now.
This is no good.
And then all the water is gone except Dasani for some reason.
It sounds Italian.
Well, no.
No, it's because everyone knows this.
Because even on the bottle, it's Coca-Cola water.
That's just tap water that's been filtered.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
The whole thing is nuts.
But I got a couple of clips of some Italy stuff, since you did mention it.
And I thought this was interesting.
This is the rules clip.
Italy rules and something.
I wrote it down.
I don't know what it says.
Italy remains on lockdown as officials and health care workers struggle to contain the coronavirus pandemic.
Special correspondent Christopher Lipse joins us now via Skype from Rome.
Chris, we had a conversation a week ago.
What's changed?
Well, the lockdown that was previously limited to northern Italy, the hot spot here in this country, it expanded to cover the entire country.
First of all, when he says it's a lockdown, it's bullshit.
This is a prime example of the type of shit that the mainstream media is doing.
It's non-lockdown.
The reporter seems to be locked down.
He won't leave his room.
This guy is full of crap.
I mean, as far south as Sicily, including the capital in Rome, where I am.
And then in the past couple of days, they've actually heightened those restrictions.
And so you're only supposed to go out if it's absolutely necessary.
Ah, see, a little bit different than a lockdown.
No, you can go out to go to your job.
You can go out to the grocery store.
Yeah, no, he explains it.
If you need to go to the hospital, if you need to get food.
And that means that the types of services you'll find once you do go out are also limited.
It means that cafes and clothing stores, they're all closed now as part of this ban in place.
Pharmacies you will find open.
Grocery stores you will find open.
But if you want to actually be outside of your home, you have to have proof that it's a good reason.
So that means carrying with you this self-minted affidavit in which you explain your business.
And if you don't have this on you and the police stop you, you can be fined or even arrested.
And by last count, about 5,000 Italians had already been charged for breaking these rules that are in place.
Well, great.
This is the thing you print off the internet.
You fill it in yourself.
Play the second clip.
These are limited resources.
A ventilator can cost tens of thousands of euros, and you have to be on these devices for six to eight days at times.
And if you're in your 80s, your chance of recovery is very low.
So in a lot of hospitals, it's become a wartime situation in which doctors have to decide whether to give it to the 80 year old or whether to give it to the 50 year old or 30 year old.
I mean, there are reports now of the dead not being able to be collected from their homes because the health services are repart.
Reports.
...are overwhelmed, and you can't get a funeral home that's willing to risk going inside a house where there's coronavirus because they don't want to get infected.
I mean, it conjures up images from the Middle Ages when you had the Black Death sweeping through this exact same place where I'm talking to you from.
This is what's so interesting.
Where are...
They had the pictures, all the pictures.
Where are the pictures now?
Where are the pictures?
But still what he described, what was he actually describing?
I just hate to bring this up just kind of as a callback.
He's describing a death panel.
Yes.
Who decides?
It's a death panel.
Well, and thank you.
Would everyone please put in a little Google News tracker for the national health system in the UK? People are flipping out.
It's underfunded.
We're already 10,000 doctors short.
Mm-hmm.
Yes, and who's going to decide who gets in, who doesn't get in?
This is exactly, exactly why you don't want this kind of centralized control.
On Italy.
And this is the same for Ohio.
When I heard Ohio, Ohio's number 100,000, all the light bulbs went off.
And that's when I... I didn't know that you could fly directly from Wuhan to Toledo.
Well, you can't now, but this is a hotbed of Chinese activity.
No wonder if they were coming in in December, January, bringing this virus with them.
Of course everyone there is in flake.
Doesn't mean people are dead and you have to lock down Ohio.
Italy is different for a couple reasons.
Lock it down!
Well, the main thing is Italy was the first country in the European Union against the wishes of the 27 other member states who joined up and had Xi Jinping and all the muckety-mucks from the CCP a year ago, almost to the day, in northern Italy.
We're part of Belt and Road.
Yes, it's great.
There's 100,000 workers, Chinese workers, in the factories in Northern Italy.
Are these people who have died?
Were they factory workers who maybe even be in below Western standard housing situation?
We don't know.
No one's told us who these people are.
By the way, this is an irritant with me from the get-go.
I've mentioned it before on the show.
I don't see why we can't get the ethnic...
Or age.
Or age.
Or age even.
How about age?
Ethnicity would be very interesting.
I'll take age.
Absolutely.
So, but the tip-off, the tip-off to this, well, there's two pieces.
There was supposed to be a big meeting, a big launch of something on the 23rd of March with the Chinese.
That, of course, is off the table.
The tip-off came.
Do you remember Willow sent me the voicemail message, which we played on the show, and she was talking about the racism against the Chinese and they were going to Chinese restaurants to try and show solidarity?
Yeah.
I looked into this, and they went even further.
The local government instituted the hug a Chinese, and they had Chinese people on the streets of Italy, Florence is what I saw, with a mask on, with a blindfold on, and with a sign that says, please hug a Chinese.
And this is the Communist Party who are insane about Taiwan even being called Taiwan on the map.
In fact, Taiwan isn't even Taiwan on Wikipedia.
It's the ROC, Republic of China.
They're out there telling the Italians, you better have people loving the Chinese.
And so then they come up with all these crazy things like hug a Chinese, go to the Chinese restaurant, don't be racist.
And this is what CNN is doing now.
Oh, you can't call it Wuhan.
No, that would be bad.
That's racist.
That's xenophobic.
That's horrible.
CNN is owned by Warner Media.
Warner Media is owned by AT&T. AT&T has huge deals with Huawei and Chinese telecom companies.
The call went out.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Stop calling it the Chinese.
Stop calling it Wuhan.
And then all of a sudden the CNN anchors are all telling you that it's racist to say that.
If the Chinese have time for all that, then certainly things are not as dire as they appear to be.
Here is China's top virus expert.
This is the man who shepherded China through the SARS outbreak.
China's senior medical advisor, Zhong Nanshan, says the coronavirus outbreak may peak soon and may be over by April.
In an interview with Reuters, Mr.
Tong said that the prediction was made based on mathematical modeling.
The 83 year old is known for combating the SARS crisis in China in 2003.
This comes as the death toll from the coronavirus epidemic in China hit 1016.
So he's expecting it to be over in a few weeks as well.
Could be true.
Could not be true.
I don't know.
I hear the president sneaking those words in.
They're stuck in my mind.
I always think he knows something that he can't say.
Could be wrong, but I've said April 6th because April 6th would be exactly 30 days after the initial $8.3 billion was released.
And I think when everyone has the initial money, then things will die down.
Not so for New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio, who showed his true color, red, in this little ditty with Joy Reid.
The testing thing, I think, is really, and maybe I'm a bit obsessed with it, because at this point, it seems insane.
In a modern country, in a great city like New York City, that it seems almost impossible for people to get a test.
Can a New Yorker or someone in this city that is symptomatic in some way get a test if they need it, and if so, how?
Joy, people can get a test.
It is according to a priority structure, and it's not enough testing.
It's just as simple as that.
We have been pleading with the federal government for weeks, publicly, letters, phone calls, get us testing so we can get ahead of this.
Here's the reality.
This is a war-like situation.
We're in a wartime scenario with a mar-a-lago attitude being used by the federal government, right?
It's so laid back.
And I don't understand it.
And by the way, testing?
How about ventilators?
Where is the federal government making sure that our hospitals have the ventilators that we're going to need?
Where is the federal government when it comes to surgical masks, getting them distributed where they need?
This is a case for a nationalization, literally a nationalization of crucial factories and industries that could produce the medical supplies to prepare this country for what we need.
So instead of doing what the president did, which is call everybody and say, hey, let's get on the stick here, this douchebag wants to literally nationalize these companies.
Okay, you seem like a stable person, and we don't have factories that make those products anymore.
The silver lining to this all is that we'll bring a lot of that manufacturing back.
And I have to say it again, I cannot believe the coincidence that Of the past three years, Donald Trump says China's a problem.
No one's ever talked about China publicly.
No one cares.
He had China and immigration.
China, China, China.
Comes in.
First thing he says, let's get our own steel going.
We can't trust Chinese steel.
We need to have our own steel.
Without your own steel, you don't have a country.
You can't defend yourself.
Then let's bring manufacturing back.
Then the trade tariffs.
Then the tax break, which repatriated all the money, with the pressure on the Chinese economy, and then, by coincidence, wow, man, Wuhan has to shut down?
It's crazy how that works.
John Hopkins seems to be in the middle of a lot of this, as you pointed out, with the event 201.
And we got an anonymous note from one of our producers who operates in the John Hopkins system.
John is correct.
John Hopkins is spook central.
Though I have not heard anything about involvement from U.S. intelligence agencies, what I have heard for the past few months, my department of the hospital has been dealing with the fallout from at least 10 research doctors who were found to be spying for China.
One of them was specifically brought over with money from an endowment set up via charitable donation that is specifically to be used to bring over postdoc fellows from mainland China.
There's been a push for more funds like this to be set up in the department, with the loudest voices coming from the docks who are Chinese nationals.
So this wasn't just Harvard.
This is rampant.
You just got to think it's coincidental how all these things happen.
I really love your booby trap theory.
But John Hopkins continues to put out webinars and interesting factoids and podcasts about the coronavirus, and sometimes the truth just wants to slip out.
Here's the most recent panel discussing it.
And so we saw a lot of rumors about government conspiracies in our dataset.
And now on the novel coronavirus, there's some rumors about government conspiracies.
Can you talk about what you're seeing as you're looking out at the current landscape of information?
Yeah, we have here, you know, we have an example of that coronavirus might have originated in a lab linked to China's bio-warfare program.
That's misinformation.
The interesting thing about this misinformation is that if you go to a different country, it blames a different country.
So this is a coordinated effort to sow discord and division when we need it the most, when we need to have cooperation the most.
I mean, come on!
This is a coordinated effort to sow confusion when we need it the most.
Exactly!
This is what happens when you're a spy inside the Johns Hopkins University system, is you get confused.
That's a good one.
I don't really have anything else.
I do have the new Rochelle clips with the update.
They got the, by the way, talking about programming people.
Let's bring the National Guard in so we're used to seeing the military on the streets.
The mobile testing center will serve all residents of Westchester County, but officials are prioritizing people in New Rochelle, the town where it's located.
It's one of America's hotspots for COVID-19.
Most of the city's cases originated from Young Israel Synagogue of New Rochelle.
Earlier this week, it was made the center of a, quote, containment area by the state of New York.
For two weeks, for one mile in every direction, large gatherings would be banned.
That meant closing schools, local colleges, and community centers, as well as religious institutions.
The state's National Guard would also be deployed.
It's a sensible means of controlling the spread of the virus in an area where it has a high concentration, but it's not an exclusion zone, it's not a quarantine zone, no one is prevented from entering or leaving.
Noam Branson is the mayor of New Rochelle.
He says the State National Guard's role in the containment area is limited.
The Guard is here in New Rochelle to provide logistical and operational support, principally delivering meals to students who cannot receive them at the public schools, providing supplies, providing cleaning services to large facilities.
These are things that will be entirely beyond the capacity of a municipality the size of New Rochelle, so we're grateful to have their support.
But they're not here in a military or policing function, and I think it's very important to draw that distinction.
This is interesting.
This was...
What day did they talk about this?
The National Guard being there?
This should have been on either on...
This probably was yesterday.
Hmm.
Okay.
No, that can't be.
I got a note on Thursday from producer Andrew...
And he says, hey, I'm on my way to New Rochelle for a service call, but apparently the National Guard is there.
And I don't know why he's emailing me.
Well, this clip is from yesterday.
It doesn't mean it didn't happen early.
Oh, okay.
And I don't know why he's really emailing me.
He's like, I hear the National Guard is there.
I'm like, I don't know.
And so I follow up.
I said, hey, man, did you ever make it in?
He said, yeah, there was nothing.
Here's nothing to see.
I don't know where the containment zone was, but everything was normal.
I could travel around, had to pick up some auto parts.
Here, I took some pics of a Chevy in New Rochelle that I had to take a look.
It's like, it's all in your head.
You know, you think containment zone, National Guard, you know, I immediately see, you know, like a Will Smith movie or a Brad Pitt movie with the National Guard.
Sorry, sir, can't come beyond the checkpoint.
No!
This is, at this point, psychological warfare at best by the media itself for ratings, but probably a hell of a lot more.
This is crazy!
We could do this about anything.
What's in the second part of this report?
Chris, we have any idea how the virus is spreading in New York?
Right now, what we know, and this will certainly change, is that there are over 500 confirmed cases in New York State, the majority of which are in New York City.
And just this morning, New York State reported its first death.
An 82-year-old woman in New York City who had been suffering from emphysema did indeed die from the coronavirus.
Of course.
You know, this actually reminds me of War of the Worlds.
This is like an Orson Welles thing, man.
83-year-old woman suffering from emphysema on her last legs.
Yes.
Mark down another killer.
Corona the killer!
Exactly.
I will say I like the kids who have given the coronavirus a new nickname.
The young kids, the Gen Z kids.
It's called the Boomer Remover.
I like that.
That's cute.
That's cute.
That's kids.
You know, the funny thing is when they're walking by, you can trip them.
And then we had the Family's First Act, Coronavirus Response Act, which...
It was lauded as some huge, great thing that was being done, although as I read through it, it seems like very poor people will be helped, and rich people or people who own larger businesses will be helped, and everybody in the middle can go, suck it.
You're not getting anything.
I don't think many people are getting anything.
Let's go back and listen to what he said in the last clip.
New York City, what's its population, seven, eight million?
Is it not more than that?
I don't know exactly.
Somebody in the chat room might have the newest numbers, but it's up there.
It's in the, you know, close to 10 million.
And you have 500 people that have been infected in one death.
I mean, so there's a quick response team.
Nobody has this disease.
It's 500 out of 10 million people?
Right.
Yes.
And even if you took the Chinese example, 1.5 billion people, it's a very small fraction of the overall population.
But we're being sigh-off.
We're being frightened by the numbers and online that propagates beautifully.
You're not being frightened.
No.
I'm not being frightened.
I don't think that many of our listeners are being frightened.
The public at large.
Why is there only a few voices of reason out there?
Besides Trump, by the way.
Yeah.
Because we don't have any commercial interests, A. We take no money from China, because China's asshole.
And we understand the media, and we can do simple math.
And I think we inherently are distrustful of experts telling us something, and we go and do research and compare it to other experts.
This show has been looking at this for eight weeks.
We were talking about the economic impact only from the Chinese perspective and the JIT, the just-in-time supply line, eight weeks ago.
So this is no surprise.
In fact, most people watched The Bachelor the other night.
That was what they were really doing, sitting at home watching The Bachelor.
That's what most people do.
The drones.
And if they do watch the news, all they're getting is corona.
As I mentioned, the entire show.
Yeah.
The entire show.
Yeah.
And by the way, there is other news, and we do have some of it.
Yeah, we're going to get to that.
Coming up.
Pelosi tried to do a big grand gesture, like, oh, here we are.
Yes, we have to put families first.
And she has the same problem I have, although I've practiced it, and I can say epidemiology.
To understand the epilogical spread of the virus.
The spread of the virus.
You've got to practice these things.
And I think the saddest part of her presentation of what this bill is was what is in it.
And I was in the car and I heard this like, oh, woman, seriously, you did that?
The three most important parts of this bill are testing, testing, testing.
Let's hit for testing!
Yay!
What a moron.
Before we take our break, let's just lead...
We can probably lead into the biggest joke of them all, which was Joe Biden and...
Joe wanted to look presidential and he wanted to do a coronavirus town hall meeting so that he could, of course, do what presidents do, calm everybody down.
Before they started, they had the crack audio team...
That we have been following and just appreciating to no end for their incredible lack of professionalism or hearing capability have completely screwed Joe Biden time and time again.
Now we're going to do it right, people.
We're going to set this up.
We can't have this mess up.
The No Agenda guys are talking about how over-modulated it is.
What is going on?
Fix this.
Get it right.
Are we still hearing the same thing?
Yeah.
We're going to do the last final mic check.
*thud* Sorry for the hiss.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.
Yes!
Okay.
Now, again, not a professional mic check.
We all know if you know what you're doing is check, check, check, 1, 2, 1, 2.
You never go past the two.
And then they kicked off the town hall for the coronavirus with some confusion.
This is actual video from the town hall.
Was that right?
No, no, no.
I'll tell you in a moment what happened, but this was the audio from the actual beginning.
Yeah, no, I told my house I knew this didn't work out.
Five, five.
I'm sorry for this technical problem because we've all those folks on the line.
It's too incredible.
Senator, I'm not going to tell you that's going to be dead.
But I can promise you that my president, I'm able to prepare better.
Okay, so here's what happened.
And I'll start at the end.
You actually heard Joe Biden say, we'll be prepared better.
So the guy who can't get an audio sound right for the life of him during the life of his campaign is going to prepare better for Corona.
What they did is they used Zoom video.
And these amateurs, and it's just as egregious as streaming the President pre and post his Oval Office speech, just as egregious.
They set it up, and there's multiple ways to use it, but typically when you use Zoom video, when someone starts talking, it will switch to that person's video.
So, however they did it, they had some people from the campaign watching on the Zoom video.
The baby cries, and of course it's not muted, so the sound comes through, and then boom, you get the picture of wherever the screen switches to wherever the baby's coming through.
Then some Indian guy pops up, and because he's making noise, and everyone's trying to mute their devices because they had no training, didn't know how to use the product, and we're clearly ill-prepared, Joe.
Ill-prepared.
And then, with all the testing they did of his microphone, they had an obvious interface mismatch.
Either the bitrate, it basically needed to unplug and plug the sound card back in again.
Hadn't figured that one out, so they finally gave Joe an iPhone to talk into, which made him look...
Anything but presidential.
Providing for the additional funding that would provide for no hidden bills, etc.
And I can get it done, I can get it done quickly, and people will be covered.
But even I can't do that for another two years, another year between now and November.
Or actually January.
But to be covered.
God.
So, so incredibly sad.
A disaster.
The funny one is when he walks off camera.
Yeah, well that's not an audio gag, unfortunately.
But yeah, he just walks off.
And this was the speech that would show that he is more prepared than President Trump.
That's the irony of it all.
Well, the funny thing is, is the way the Hollywoodies, like Melissa Milano, comes out and says something like, Joe Biden said, I love your leadership during the coronavirus, as if he's doing anything.
And Rob Reiner's falling all over himself about how Joe Biden's going to be such a great president.
What is wrong with these people?
Yeah.
We will find out momentarily, but first I'd like to thank you for your courage and say in the morning to you, the man who put the sea firmly in the curve we have to flatten, John C. DeVore!
Well, in the morning to you, Adam Curry.
In the morning, all ships, sea boots on the ground, feet in the air, subs in the water.
All the hockey refs and dames and knights out there.
Yes, in the morning to trolls in the troll room.
Whoa!
Bingo!
I knew people would be tuning in.
We're up to 1,800 today, John.
That's pretty big.
No wonder people are...
I've seen this thing scroll by and lots of people are talking.
That's probably 25% more than we typically have.
Nice to see you, trolls, and troll away!
Very good.
Noagendastream.com.
It is truly the best thing you can have in your coronavirus safety kit is Noagendastream.com because you can listen to some podcasts, no commercials, no corporate money, no interruptions, and you can troll away in the troll room.
And all their amygdalas are small, so you'll feel good, you'll feel right at home.
And then a big in the morning to Mike Riley, who brought us the artwork for episode 1224, our previous show on Thursday.
The title of that was Caps, and I was asked to mention specifically that he wanted to share some of the credit with comic strip blogger who had...
Now, this was the locust slash cricket.
Looked more like a cricket.
With a sign that said, free food and a little asterisk kosher.
And he had indeed uploaded it twice, once without the kosher and one with the kosher, and that was upon the recommendation of Comic Strip Blogger, he put it in.
I think it actually did make it.
I think that made it just that extra bit better to put the kosher on there.
And this was since we know the Israelis love eating locusts because they're kosher.
And it popped.
It was a great piece of artwork.
Popped out.
Love it.
And we thank you for your courage.
Mike Riley is a part of our Value for Value Network where everybody can contribute one way or the other.
The art is a huge contribution because we are one of the few podcasts whose album art changes with every single show.
It's exciting.
It gets attention.
People like it.
It looks good in the podcast app.
In fact, it makes the whole industry look good.
And noagendaartgenerator.com is where you can upload your art if you want to participate or have a look at the tens of thousands of pieces that we have that people have done over the years.
Also part of our value for value system is the executive producers and associate executive producers who financially support the show and we're going to thank a number of them for today, episode 1225.
Starting with Matthew Januszewski in Chicago.
1261.
Curiously, it's the show 1225 Club Donation Plus, which is interesting to do it.
Didn't we have a rule about that?
About what?
Backdating your club donations?
Well, he's not backdating it.
He's giving it plus the PayPal VIG. Oh, plus the VIG. What did you think he was doing?
I totally misunderstood.
Then he says, no jingles, no karma.
Wow.
What?
Wow.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present the Grand Duke of the Pacific Northwest, Sir Dwayne Melanson.
Wow.
I know, I'm on the ball.
I'm on the ball today.
You are, you've been coffeed up today.
I'm on the ball.
That was good.
I was stunned.
I know.
Normally it goes like this.
And then, oh, well, I think I have something special to do, something to play here.
No, no, this time I nailed it.
$333.33.
He's in Tigard, Oregon.
By the way, Alan Bean's up there now.
The Baron.
They have a lot of people in this area.
I think I've been through there.
I think it's in the wine-growing area or someplace in northern Oregon.
I could be mistaken.
ITM gents, I sold a bottle of hand sanitizer and I'm splitting the proceeds with you.
Woo!
Self-quarantining is better with no agenda to distract me.
By the way, a Corona jingle...
By the way, a Corona...
A Corona jingle and can you see that juice with karma for all producers, please?
Oh, we can do that?
Oh my gosh!
Can you see that juice?
I got myself a king of Wuhan flu I don't know what I am supposed to do Didn't know I had it when I gave it to you Now we all got the Wuhan flu You've got karma Dame Laura, 31415.
Happy Pi Day, John and Adam.
Had to donate to register my frustrations about the innumeracy of the elites.
Innumerate.
I'm not sure how she's using this term.
Of the elites regarding coronavirus and celebrate...
celebrate...
The circle.
Yeah, 314, Pi, the circle, enumerated.
Oh, the circle.
It's a number donation, John.
Your whole idea in the first place.
I know what I put in the newsletter.
But I'm getting confused with the elites, the circle, I don't know.
You've already reviewed the numbers, but what hasn't been discussed are the unintended consequences.
My family has been hit in ways...
By the way, you know, they also closed all the Apple stores.
Well, that's a plus.
I mean, that's a germ pit just waiting to spread all kinds of nastiness.
Apple stores equals germ pit.
Next.
Next.
My family has been hit in ways that I could never have anticipated.
I'm a doc, and the AAAA Conference, American Academy of Allergies, Asthma, and Immunologies, canceled their conference in Philly for this week, and this was a minor inconvenience, and if that Where all that was affected, it would be minimal.
However, my college-age son is now stuck at home for another three weeks.
This is a disaster, yes.
Yeah.
By the way, somebody pointed out at the dinner table, they expect a lot of two things to happen, besides maybe a baby boom.
Oh, yes, the corona baby boom.
A divorce boom.
You want to invest in some divorce attorneys.
I'll invest in baby stuff.
I'm much more optimistic.
I'm a gloptimist.
The idea of mom and dad having to be stuck with each other with the kids at the later ages.
Yeah, this is not a recipe for success.
No.
And especially when you're...
I was talking about this, too.
When you're working from home, not everybody knows how to work from home.
It sounds, oh, I get to work from home.
A lot of people think it's a cool thing, but when you do it, you can't do it.
A lot of people can't work from home and stay safe.
It's very difficult to do.
I mean, I've been doing it now, well, full-time from home, what, the past 11 years, maybe, of the 13 years of the show?
Maybe 10?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it goes like this.
You get up, you do some email, and then you've still got your house coat on.
And then around 1 o'clock, you like the first joint, you're like, you know, I should probably get to work.
Yeah, well, see, you still don't know how to work from home.
No, of course I don't.
But I bring my A-game every Thursday.
I've kind of worked from home since 1985, so I'm pretty easy to do.
Which is why we also don't have any virus, because we don't get out.
That's why we're not sick.
His younger brother, a high school junior, has been most affected.
Blackface Ralph, a.k.a.
the Virginia governor, canceled school for at least two weeks yesterday because of this.
My son's SAT schedule for today, Saturday, was canceled as well.
He now gets to take the classes at home as he prepares for multiple AP tests in a month and a half.
In addition to continuing SAT prep for the test that was canceled, his class trip to New York City was canceled.
He finally made varsity soccer, and that's been delayed at least two weeks.
The fact that any of my kids could make a varsity team is a cause for a huge celebration.
The kid is 17.
If he gets coronavirus, he'll sniffle twice and keep on doing what he does.
He has had influenza B last month, despite the vaccine.
Hello.
And this, by the way, learn about Tamiflu.
And this time has greater health impacts on most people than the coronavirus ever will.
Anyway, I apologize for war and peace, but this has been such an overreaction to what should be handled with handwashing and staying home a bit.
We don't recommend no sex as a prevention of HIV-AIDS, only safe sex.
Good point.
And HIV-AIDS will kill people by many orders of magnitude more than COVID-19 ever will.
That's a great point.
This has been bungled.
Yeah, well, no, maybe not.
Has it been bungled or is it on target?
That's the question.
Well, we're on the fence about that.
We'll close with, Lord, what fools these mortals be from a Midsummer's Night dream and ask for karma for my son as he preserves, prepares for his exams.
This donation also allows me to become a baronetess.
Oh, that is not on my list.
She should be on the list.
Okay, I will put it in.
Dame Laura becomes a baronetess.
Anything else?
And I am yours with much appreciation, Laura.
You've got karma.
Okay.
314.15, the pie donation.
We have two of those.
That...
That paid off big.
Two.
Woo!
Numerology.
Let's hear it for numbers.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sir Kevin McLaughlin, Earl of Luna, Locust, North Carolina, 3-4.
He's the other one, 3-14-15.
Jingles, Jobs, Carmichael, I'm extremely close to becoming a Duke.
A few questions for the peerage committee.
One, becoming a Duke, does that mean I get a sash?
If you want to go to Michael's, you can buy a sash there.
Take a picture when you're wearing it and send it, though.
We'd love to see it.
You are allowed, by the rules, to create and wear your own decorative sash, ceremonial sash.
Or medals.
And any medals, ribbons.
But you must send us a picture of you in full gear.
Will there be any small batch limited production night rings to purchase in the near future?
Don't know.
The regular ones are available.
My plan is to forego the standard ring and purchase one.
I missed the boat on the last round.
These are made by Eric.
Eric does those.
He does them only once a year.
So they come and go.
With regards to additional lands, I'm thinking of claiming...
That I'm thinking of claiming that given the giver of light, the ever radiant Saul, if that's applicable with the committee.
That's acceptable.
Yeah, I guess.
It's the next donation to my greatest, to the greatest podcast universe, according to the Mueller report, Sir Kevin McLaughlin, Earl of Luna.
Yeah, so he wants to be.
Oh, he wants to go change Luna to Saul?
Is that what he's thinking?
Yeah.
I'm having trouble with this.
With regards to the additional lands, so he's talking about his dukedom when he gets there.
Yeah.
He wants claiming the giver of light.
He's got Luna, now he wants the sun?
He wants the moon and the sun?
Ah, man, I don't know.
It's a big one.
But you are the peerage committee, John.
It's in committee.
Oh, wait.
He wanted a jobs with that.
Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
Let's vote for jobs.
You've got karma.
There's the luge karma.
We still have it.
We got everything here.
We got it for you.
Alright, first I thought that this next donation was a joke.
I mean, the name was a joke because you always say Laura Ingraham.
Yes, Ingraham.
Yeah, so this is David Ingraham.
Actually is Ingraham.
$233.
And so I looked him up in the squirrel mail, and before you could even play the theme, it popped right up.
Oh, damn.
And under David Ingraham.
Ingraham, yes, beautiful.
Please attribute this donation to Anonymous.
Alrighty then!
Nah, I'm just kidding.
Do I need to set an edit point here?
Please attribute this donation to my sister Kayla Ingraham in terms of producer credits.
Okay, we've got to remember that one.
You might want to write it right.
What's her name?
Laura?
Kayla.
Just kidding.
Not Laura.
Just kidding.
K-A-Y-L-A? Yeah.
Kayla!
Got it.
Greetings, Adam, John, and the No Agenda producers.
This donation represents this show's share of my Christmas bonus.
Yes, it's a little late, but I finally got around to it.
Reminds me of the guy who comes with a meetup with an envelope with a stamp on it.
Address to the No Agenda show from like months ago.
And he hands me this.
He says, I meant to put it in the mail.
It's like, the check was like 60 days old.
I can't think it went through.
Do they still take that at the bank?
The bank usually cuts it off at about 45.
I was going to say.
So you've got to be careful.
Will they even take your checks when you go?
Because people don't know, but John, he goes to the bank with a knapsack.
I go to the bank with the checks, with a pile of checks.
Napsack.
But won't they be worried about the dirty checks?
Oh.
Corona?
Corona cash?
Corona cash, yeah.
Well, checks, they haven't said anything about checks, but it's only the cash that carries corona, if you remember.
That's why they're washing the cash in some parts of the country.
In China, they were zapping them with gamma radiation.
They're getting rid of it so we only would use digital.
Come on, we all know this is part of it.
It's a little late, but I finally got around, and I have four human resources with another on the way, keeping his wife busy, and my wife stays home with the kids.
So scrape, eating, yeah.
There's all kinds of material here we want to use.
We got your setup.
No scraping together with a donation can be, I know it can be difficult, but you are worth it, you too.
Thank you.
Me and my wife and my sister drove from Omaha to Des Moines to meet Adam and Tina at the meet-up, and it was one of the great highlights of my life!
Aww, that's so nice.
Yeah, well, Tina is exciting to meet, I understand.
We eagerly await a visit from John to Omaha.
Good luck!
It's a nice town.
Good luck with that!
Isn't there a...
the Corn Palace, I think, is nearby.
Yeah.
Anyway, lately you've been enjoying hearing how listeners got started with the show, so I thought I'd share my story.
I'm a tech.
I'm a tech-loving millennial.
A tech-loving millennial named Ben, a dude named Ben.
And way back in 2012, I was watching Twit.
Previously, I'd heard John talking about the show that he was doing twice weekly and kept telling myself, I need to check it out, as John was the only host on Twit who ever said anything interesting.
Hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
But I never did until John's co-host was on Twit.
And brandished not just any gun, but a judge.
This is a long time ago.
This is nine years ago.
2012.
Yeah, there you go.
Eight years ago.
I immediately subscribed to No Agenda and started listening.
Five minutes into the first episode, I stopped the show, called my sister, and told her to clear her podcast schedule.
We have been listening ever since.
And the family that No Agendas together stays together.
And he's got a couple PS's here.
I have a human resource on this.
So please send some new human resource karma.
Shut up already at science.
And the classic WTC7 won't go away.
So we got karma, which we got lined up.
Shut up already at science and WTC7. WTC7 won't go away.
Hit it.
Shut up already!
It's science!
WTC7 won't go away!
You've got karma.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That was perfect.
I could not have asked for a better podcast partner that time.
Landon Dallin in LaSalle, Ontario.
$229.99.
Thank you for all you do.
Please accept my donation of 33.33cad.
This, by the way, has to be bumped up.
Yes, Landon will be an executive producer.
That's our agreement with the Dollaretts, Scandinavian, New Zealander, or Aussie.
We accept them value for value at face value, so above $300.
Your dollar was worth a dollar once.
Yep, it was once.
And you didn't be okay.
I've given you more of them.
It was budgeted for toilet paper, but alas, when I got to the store, the shelves were bare.
So I figured I'd forward it to the only two gentlemen I know that are something more than Charmin Ultra Soft in this time of absolute madness.
Please keep doing what you do and send me and my wife some baby-making karma.
Okay.
Well, this is the time for it.
The Corona baby boom.
Jingle request.
That sounds pretty good.
And amen fist bump.
I think that sounds pretty good.
Amen fist bump.
You've got karma.
Emily Gaither in Eau Claire.
And she writes in, ITM gents, this donation is from my hot husband Jed's 37th birthday on the 17th.
If he could get some foamer, would someone think of the children and a goat-flavored jobs, Carmen, that would be much appreciated.
He also needs a healthy de-douche.
You've been de-douched.
Would you please call out...
I just got some call-outs here.
Oh, okay.
All right.
Douchebag call-outs.
I'll give you one at a time.
All right.
Joel.
Douchebag.
Joth.
Douchebag.
He deserved it.
Yeah, J-O-S-T-H. Joth.
And lastly, Emily.
Douchebag.
As douchebags.
Thanks a million for everything.
Love and light.
Emily.
Hey!
Oh, my God!
Woo!
Listen to that horn!
Oh, won't somebody please think of the children?
Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
Let's vote for jobs!
You've got karma.
Okay, now we have a note.
We probably should at least see if we can find it.
This is Levi...
Prinzing.
Prinzing?
P-R-I-N-Z-I-N-G. COVID! Oh, wait.
I thought you were looking for the note.
You can't just like...
You're cutting me short.
You said you were going to look for the note!
I am.
I'm going to go now.
Okay, that's right, ladies and gentlemen.
When we need a note, there's only one place that we can find the email.
Because this is not some Microsoft exchange.
This is not iOS email.
No, this is nothing like it.
This is the one and only that actually works and will bring the mail to the top.
I don't care if you're talking through me because we have to finish the jingle because John C. Dvorak will find the mail from this particular donator and he finds it with the best program in the universe.
We call it...
Okay.
Did you find it?
I found it right away.
What?
Well, the problem here is I have to type in the name one too many times where the name is missing.
I don't know.
First, you guys are great, he says.
Or she.
I don't know if it's she or he.
Levi's.
I think male.
More male than female, maybe.
A couple women around here.
First, you guys are great.
I wish I could give more often.
Next, COVID-19 panic seems to have hit Minnesota.
I work as a maintenance, yes, guy, dude named Ben.
Okay, this is definitely a male.
For a retirement community.
In the Bay Area, I wouldn't say that necessarily.
In the retirement community.
And today, we move to basically a lockdown status.
Ugh.
The retirement community, yeah.
And that's where you want to lock down.
The retirement community is exactly...
That is where you want to be careful.
Flu, too.
Just be careful there, of course.
And clean out your bong water, people.
Yes, please.
Use it in your spaghetti sauce.
It's delicious.
Today we just moved basically to a lockdown situation.
Unless it is the end of life or emergency situations, we are not letting anyone other than employees and some contractors, if they are screened, onto the campus.
Also, in the community, you can barely buy toilet paper, hand sanitizer, or any...
Or any basic...
What is this?
We have to have a name for these toilet paper hoarders.
We've got to give them a name so they can be identified, so we can put a little sticker on them.
They should have a sticker on their heads.
You're a toilet paper hoarder.
Any basic PPE anywhere.
What's PPE? Personal protection equipment.
Personal...
Yes, personal protective equipment, masks, goggles, gloves.
And he says, it sucks within the hospitals and care centers.
You can't get the equipment they need to keep residents and patients safe because a bunch of morons make runs on suppliers so we can't do our jobs.
Yeah.
I got it.
I got it.
Toilet preppers.
Toilet Preppers.
I think that's a pretty good one.
Well, if nothing else, it's a show title.
For sure.
Toilet Preppers.
Toilet Preppers.
Damn Toilet Preppers.
Okay.
I'm kind of buzzed at the moment.
I didn't stock up on the teepee.
But got a few cases of wine because I'm locked in my house with five kids.
Three teens and two toddlers.
For who knows how long since they may cancel public school too.
They will.
Other districts have already done so.
Sorry for a long note.
Love you guys.
Keep the great work.
No jingles or anything?
I forgot the jingles.
Yes!
We're prepared.
We're prepared on the No Agenda show.
Onward.
Thanks, Levi.
Sophia...
Sophia Pandalea.
Sophia Pandalea in San Jose, California.
You are the only source of news I trust.
Thank you for doing what you do.
If possible, asking for a health karma.
Of course we have that for you, Sophia.
Thank you for your courage.
You've got karma.
Bob Osegueda.
He wrote a note.
I don't have it in front of me.
It was a note saying that he sent some money in.
I will see if there's another note, because I asked him, you want me to say something on the show?
And I haven't heard back, or maybe I have, and if I have, I'll put it on the second half of the show, Bob.
Otherwise, you're good for $200,000.
Justin Monroe in Marionette, Wisconsin.
Justin Monroe, surprise!
He has a note?
I have a note.
It's a surprise because this is not really from him.
Oh.
In the morning, Jess, this is from his wife, Amanda Monroe.
Oh, surprise.
Oh.
Yes, this is what we like.
We like more of these.
Whee!
Beep, beep.
In the morning, gents, the enclosed donation is to be credited towards my husband, Justin.
I felt that making him a producer for an episode of the best podcast in the universe would be an awesome birthday surprise.
He turns 34 on 312, which is two days ago.
And he's on the list.
Thank you for it.
It is.
And by the way, awesome, awesome birthday surprise.
Yes, we don't use that word lightly.
No.
Thank you for your courage and the awesome show twice a week.
Wow.
Karma and dealer's choice for jingles.
Ah, dealer's choice.
I mean, what do we give for a birthday boy?
I don't know.
I would think...
Well, guess what we were missing in all these selections?
Nobody asked for a Sharpton for the first time in months.
Hmm.
Well, then we should do a classic Sharpton teleprompter, I feel.
Let's do a teleprompter.
Anything else?
And a karma, and he's on the birthday list.
Yes, of course.
Thanks to you, Ed!
Is this Crown Hog Day 2?
We are watching That Was Attorney General Eric Holder, ABD, about some Republicans at home are already beating the drums of war.
Today, the Pentagon refuted that claim.
And he said the American people do not want him to quote They do not want him dwindling his thong.
You can get a gig as a contortionist.
We don't leave our women or men in uniform behind.
It's a monument to the hubris of...
Dick Cheney.
Representative Raul Ara Labrador.
Years of abuse.
I personally apologize to Mr.
Peebus.
Just asked to soon-to-be former congressman.
Democrats are outright jitty.
CIA's counter-terrorism center.
Veteran Affairs Secretary Shinschetti.
Why do I always mess up his name?
Shinseki.
I love my critics.
I have fun with that.
Oh dear God, please, please spare the Reverend Al in this horrible coronavirus.
We need him.
You've got karma.
He is the gift that keeps on giving.
Do not let him, do not let him go down.
And that'll be our last associate executive producer for show 1225.
Yes, before I thank everybody, a sad note I got late, just before the show this morning, in the morning crackpot, this message is with the heaviest of hearts.
An hour ago, my dad Bill, a.k.a.
Babbo, passed peacefully as I held his hand after a massive, inoperable stroke.
He was so kind and gentle, I can't overstate how influential he was in helping me become the man I am today.
He will be missed by so many people.
Total day wrecker.
No agenda is like, no, is an extended family to me, and it truly gives me comfort that any producer would sympathize with such a loss.
Thank you for the properly sized amygdala.
It helps more than I can express.
Love and light, Dad.
Rest in peace.
Baron Sir D.H. Slammer.
Baroness Dame Bang Bang.
Lady Simona, Sir Andrew, and Sir Emmett.
And we certainly share in their loss for today.
And thank you all for supporting the show, our executive producers and associate executive producers.
It is a privilege to be working with you on this great production we call The No Agenda Show, and we'd love to see more help for our next episode, which will be on Thursday.
Go to this website, dvorak.org.
And you can now safely roam the streets knowing that you're not going to die.
Our formula is this.
We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
Shut up, slave.
Shut up, slave.
And just a general karma there for the Slammer family's dad.
With a goat.
With a goat.
You've got karma.
All dads, all dads love a goat.
We all love a goat.
Hey, I got a viewing tip.
If you're stuck inside and you want something to watch, we just finished it last night on Netflix.
Cheer.
This is about a small town in Texas, Corsicana, Texas, who has the award-winning cheerleading squad.
And it's a five-part or six-part documentary.
It is really interesting to watch.
It sounds good.
I like it.
It is.
It's all these kids who come from broken homes.
I mean, really messed up situations.
Just dropped off and here, live in this trailer.
I'll be back next month.
That kind of deal.
And they...
Yeah, it's really, really...
There is that.
And they're such athletes...
It's a feel-good, pretty good, feel-good type of series, and I think you'll enjoy it.
And also, just the athleticism is, you know, now, hey, what else are you going to watch?
There's no sports on TV. Might as well watch cheerleading.
Oh, they're showing old games.
It's pathetic.
It's almost sad.
Yeah, sad.
Because they've got all these games.
College basketball games are showing old games.
NBA old games.
Old playoffs.
Can you imagine the hit to the advertising business?
The TV advertising business?
It's unimaginable.
Not to mention the empty stadiums and all the rest of it.
It's just pathetic.
Yeah, that's why April 6th we're done with this shit.
April 6th, we'll be up and about.
I'm not arguing the point.
You haven't been proven wrong yet.
We'll know on April 7th.
April 6th.
If it's wrong, I'll be the first to mention it.
Because somebody's got to tell you.
Meanwhile, of course, what we did miss, or you may have missed, I don't know who missed it, Because they've decided to put all television production on hiatus.
Oh, yes.
But they had to get Mayor Pete on the Jimmy Kimmel show to host it.
Oh, he's hosting it.
You missed this.
Oh, gee, John, I forgot to watch some lame-ass show.
No, I didn't miss it.
I watched David Spade on repeat.
So...
Unfortunately, because I would like to have seen Mayor Pete in front of an audience instead of in front of an empty auditorium with a bunch of his friends there.
Wait a minute.
So was Kimmel off?
He just wasn't...
Kimmel's doing a pilot for the Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, some new show, which made Regis Philbin a millionaire.
Yeah.
And so Kimmel's got that, and so he had to take the night off, but they could have just killed the show and run a rerun, but now somebody came up with the bright idea, because they're a bunch of Democrats anyway, putting Pete on.
This is CBS? ABC. Oh, ABC. ABC is the...
Somebody went back and forth with somebody on this about...
You know, we know who's, you know, NBC, Comcast is a bunch of, it's basically a front for the Democrat Party.
CBS is the CIA. Yeah, ABC is Disney.
ABC is the big mystery.
It's a Disney, who knows what they're up to.
It could be DIA, it could be Russians for all we know.
And it's got some gay undertones throughout the ABC Disney empire, which makes nothing but sense if you think that they brought Mayor Pete on.
So he could talk about his husband being in the audience of ten.
By the way, this audience made a lot of noise.
So I have three clips.
Oh, wow.
Mayor Pete must have killed it.
They're short.
Okay.
Now, the one is...
Let's see.
Here's how he opens on the show.
Just as you didn't see it, I wish I had seen it, because to just analyze how...
I think he was...
You know, he had that dumb smile on his face the whole time.
I thought he was, I didn't think he was very good.
And he had professional joke writers, but the problem with, if you're going to be a host on one of these shows, you've got a writing team maybe of six, maybe ten people.
Sometimes they've had more, sometimes they've had less.
But the key to success is not the writing team, it's you.
And the writers, they come up with all these pitches and you're the host.
Whoever you are, and you have some comedic chops.
For sure, it's a big gig.
It's not a small little thing.
I would be very nervous about doing that.
Yeah.
And he had, well, he wasn't nervous, it seemed, but his selection of material, which was his choice, was piss poor.
And then he had as his guest, I don't have any of those clips, I just have this opening.
He had Picard, Patrick Stewart on, and he basically creamed in his pants because he's a huge Star Trek fan, mainly of the Next Generation series because he's not old enough to be a fan of the original series.
And so he did everything but talk about Pete.
He did all the talking.
He was just enamored with Patrick Stewart.
And he did everything but discuss his collection of action figures.
Wait, wait, wait.
So now I know why you caught the show.
You were tuning in for Picard, weren't you?
Oh, yeah.
Yes, you were.
I gotcha.
I really dislike Patrick Stewart, but okay.
Let's play Mayor Pete's opening.
My name is Pete Buttigieg, and I am running to be the next host of Jimmy Kimmel Live.
Now, this is a strange night for us, not only because this is my first time hosting a talk show, because we are doing it without a regular studio audience.
Due to public health concerns over the coronavirus, we have canceled the studio audience tonight.
tonight.
But a few kind Kimmel staffers and some friends, my husband Chasten, all here instead.
Everyone is spread apart at the CDC recommended distance.
This was not our plan.
We just decided this a few hours ago.
And it's disappointing because, as you all know, I love to crowd surf.
It's kind of my thing.
But the experts have told us the best way to prevent the spread of the virus is for us to physically stay apart.
So that's what we're going to do.
The only way we're going to get through this crisis is with unity.
So let's do this together.
Who's with me?
Full disclosure, none of those people are here.
But when you don't have a real audience, you have to fake one.
Just like Trump's inauguration.
Oh, Pete.
you That was his first game.
That was pretty bad.
It took him the length of that clip to get his first written material.
First joke, yeah.
Now, I would like to hire...
You talk about the Joe Biden sound.
I would like to hire the guy who mic'd this audience.
Because the audience is probably around 25, 35 people, maybe.
And it's so well mic'd, except for that second part, which was sweetened because he showed another audience.
But the audience that he has there is so well mic'd, it actually sounds like a crowd.
It doesn't sound too bad, but also the audience is super enthused.
Of course, it's staff.
Oh, they're jacked.
Yeah, they're super jacked.
And there was a goat in there, too, I heard.
So it's well mic'd.
Somebody's screaming.
I think that's Chastin or whatever his name is.
So listen to the clip, too.
This is terrible.
Now, last night, President Trump addressed the nation regarding the coronavirus pandemic, and he had this message for the American people.
If we are vigilant and we can reduce the chance of infection, which we will, we will significantly impede the transmission of the virus.
The virus will not have a chance against us.
I agree that this virus is no match for the American people, but for us to get through this, we have to take immediate action.
Now, there is a bill right now in Congress that would provide free coronavirus testing for everyone who needs it, paid emergency leave, and unemployment insurance for workers who are laid off because of the economic shock.
So, for the good of every worker, every family, every community that will be hurting, we need Congress to get that done.
And where was the joke?
There was no joke.
No joke there.
Hey.
It was proselytizing.
Well, yeah.
I want to ask you a question about that.
How does unemployment insurance work?
Do you have to have it before you can claim it?
Well, it's insurance.
Right, because they're talking about unemployment insurance.
Right.
Yeah.
So you have to have unemployment insurance.
Yes, you have to put into a fund.
Well, what are they talking about then?
They're talking about...
I think they're talking about making it...
I don't know.
Okay.
Democrats love to throw out the word unemployment insurance.
I have no idea what to do.
But it means if you don't have unemployment insurance, you can't run out and get it now and say it'll be better.
I mean, I don't understand.
No, you can't.
You can't do any of that.
Okay.
So that's not clear to me either.
The rest of the bill I understand, but not the unemployment insurance.
Never mind.
I'm sorry.
Hey, Pete, great joke.
Ha, ha, ha.
What's next?
Okay, the third clip is now he's into the material.
So he is going to deliver three jokes, obviously written by this joke writer.
Three in a row?!
Yeah, bang, bang, bang.
And this is about it.
And just from this, at the end of this, then it goes downhill and it goes into Patrick Stewart where he's gushing.
And the rest of it is just this...
I didn't find it that interesting overall.
But here we go.
A lot of folks are wondering how I ended up getting booked to host this show.
And all I can say is that Iowa caucus app really screwed everything up.
Okay.
Okay.
Actually, Jimmy asked me to fill in because right now he is off taping Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, which is a game show that Michael Bloomberg won 56,000 times in a row.
Now, some people have been skeptical about me hosting a show like this.
They're like, you're too inexperienced.
You'll never be a good late-night host.
Well, a lot of people said I'd never get elected president, and I showed them.
It wasn't too bad.
I chuckled over, though.
His timing is rough.
He's not quite there.
I mean, his timing's off, but there were some good lines.
I don't dislike the guy.
It's just, it's so weird seeing him do that.
It's almost as weird as seeing Andrew Yang being a talking head on CNN. You know, the guy who could do this, you know, we're just going to start looking at politicians.
I think that Rubio should be given a guest host, because Rubio actually has comic timing.
And I say that because when he tried doing it, which has ruined his campaign when he was up against Trump.
Yes, I remember him trying, and he would try really hard, actually, to get some gags in there.
Yes, the small hands gag.
The small hands gag is pretty good.
The small hands gag stuck.
Yeah.
And his timing was impeccable.
I thought he did such a good job that it was so much like an actual comic.
And he used to be a performer, if you remember, in the sequins.
He was apparently some sort of a stage dancer.
Was he?
No, I don't remember this.
Oh, look it up.
Marco Rubio.
He was like, he had sequins.
He was like some sort of, like in a gay club or something.
I don't know.
But it was out there to the point where he's got enough show.
He has show business experience.
And he picked up.
He does.
Hold on.
Here he is.
Yeah.
Marco Rubio was an active member of the South Miami High School Dance Troupe, an all-male hybrid of the Village People and Chippendales, where he and other studly bros flopped around on stage and flaunted their tanned, rippling meat torsos.
I'm putting that in the show notes.
I'm not saying that he's a professional stand-up comic.
He's got showbiz.
He's got some showbiz chops.
But he had enough that he could deliver a line a lot better than Pete.
And I think that he should be given a shot because I think he'd be really good.
Right.
And I can understand that.
It's like it was a little too well done.
And so he lost his credibility as a serious person.
I can see him as a...
Actually, he has kind of the dancer physique now that I think about it.
Maybe a little on the short side, but he's got the right build.
Yeah.
Huh.
He should be on Dancing with the Stars.
That's how we'll get it started.
He's going to do what he does.
It's a good gig.
Right now, I think he's in charge of bringing the pharmaceutical manufacturing back.
Hasn't Trump put him in charge of that?
I don't know.
I think so.
Anyway, so that was Mayor Pete.
Well done.
Something of a disappointment.
A valiant try.
And I wonder how the ratings were.
What do you think?
Probably bad.
Well, maybe not, because maybe people are at home.
A lot of people tuned in because they were curious.
They're watching the cheerleading stuff on Netflix, believe me, if I had a choice.
In fact, I made that choice.
The opening bump was probably good.
So the monkey comes out of the sleeve on the union worker that got into a verbal assault with Joe Biden.
Yeah.
Yeah, the guy's an NRA guy.
Yeah.
Total NRA guy.
And here's his, I just pulled a minute from it, of his response clip on the NRA YouTube channel.
I am the union worker that Joe Biden tried to intimidate.
Poor shit.
Don't be stupid.
Your AR-14s are what we do.
Joe Biden wants to take my AR-14.
Let's just not tell him what it really is.
AR 14.
I got this the day after I talked to Joe.
I'm sure that's not the result he was going for.
My name is Jerry Wayne, and all I wanted to do is ask a presidential candidate a question.
I didn't intend to start a fight.
All I did was ask Joe how he was going to win over the union vote when he's planning on coming after our guns with Beto O'Rourke.
Hell yes!
We're going to take your AR-15, your AK-47.
I watched a video where he wanted to make assault weapons, or America's most popular rifle, illegal.
So I asked him about it.
Instead of answering me honestly, he acted like he never said it at all.
You are actively trying to diminish your Second Amendment right and take away your gun.
You're forced, yeah.
And it just goes on and on.
It's like a seven-minute thing.
I'm like, really, NRA? Is that all you have time for, is to go push around old men and embarrass them?
Because that's what it was.
That's true elder abuse of the old man.
They got the NRA guy in there.
Now, I'm not saying I disagree with what the overall discussion was about.
But you're going to do that and then play it up.
I find it rude.
I really do.
It's just sad.
Well, it was.
But this is the setup, guys.
This is the Project Veritas era.
I mean, if anything, you've got to be worried about this stuff, NRA. This is what it is.
And the COVID-19 pandemic could lead to a ban on guns and alcohol in one Illinois town.
Champaign's mayor signing an executive order declaring a coronavirus emergency.
It includes ordinances that allow her to ban the sale of firearms and booze.
Spokesman for the city says they might not be implemented, but are in place to protect the welfare and safety of our community.
There are currently no cases of coronavirus in Champaign, Illinois.
And those are your headlines.
Okay, I'm going to give you Clip of the Week for that.
Oh, thank you very much.
Clip of the Day.
Clip of the Day.
I'll take it.
Clip of the Day.
This is the kind of a-holes these little towns have running them.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
That's exactly it.
And that's the stuff that's kind of dangerous.
Well, you have, I mean, the town, I shouldn't say little towns, you've got one running the big town of Austin.
That's not a minor little burg.
Yeah, they haven't tried that on us, though.
They haven't tried that little ditty.
Well, they didn't have the idea yet.
Gotta ban guns because of COVID-19.
Did you hear about Andrew Gillum?
I did.
Yeah.
I'm trying to figure out what I heard because I just remember it.
Andrew Gillum ran against Ron DeSantis for governor of Florida in 2018.
He got caught in a gay tryst.
Well, nowhere has it been reported that it was a gay tryst.
What was reported is that...
I'm sorry, James Woods reported that it was a gay trip.
Well, I do trust James Woods over many mainstream sources, and that may be totally true, but there were two other men in a hotel room.
Emergency services were called.
One was ODing his heart.
He was having heart trouble.
Gillum apparently was too intoxicated or inebriated to even speak with police and was puking in the bathroom.
And there were three bags of methamphetamine and some story about, yeah, man, I went to a wedding and drank too much.
Then the other guy says, I don't know about no wedding.
It's a gay escort.
It's kind of, what a sad, sad thing to have happen.
Yeah, he almost was governor of Florida.
Governor of Florida.
By like five votes he lost.
Does he have a gig?
Does he have any other gig?
Is he doing anything?
I don't have any idea.
Probably.
He's probably part of the DNC. Which would make nothing but sense.
Let's take a quick look.
What is he doing?
He's got to be doing something.
I forgot about that story.
It's a great story.
Let me see.
It is a great story, but it's a little lewd.
It's tawdry.
It's a tawdry story, and I've been avoiding these.
It's a tawdry tale.
Tawdry Talon, when you bring him up, okay, I'll talk about him, you know, with the embellishments.
But still, how do you spell his name?
Gilliam is a really weird spelling.
G-I-L-L-U-M. Is that simple?
I thought there was an I in there.
No, G-I-L-L-U-M. Andrew Gillum.
Yeah, Gillum.
Trolls, do you know what he's doing?
Yeah, political commentator.
Well, that's right, he should be on CNN. Oh, he's on CNN, yeah.
Yeah, he should be with the other meth guy.
What's the guy who had the dildo in his boot and the rope around his neck and the meth in his pocket?
Come on!
It was Richard...
Richard, yeah, that guy.
Oh my, surely we have a clip of that guy, don't we?
He hasn't been on...
I haven't seen him for a year.
Well, he's on CNN International.
Richard...
Dick Quest.
Quest is his name.
Quest.
Oh, come on.
Surely we have this Quest clip.
It's the funniest thing ever.
Where he was caught in...
Was it one of the parks in New York?
Yeah, something like that.
And the cop says, I've got meth in my pocket, and I've got a vibrator in my boot, and I have a noose around my neck.
He was into some weird stuff, man.
I don't have that anymore.
I wish I had it.
I thought Gillen had a wiki page.
He does.
I'm not finding it.
Go ahead.
Even his profile's got Twitter, Instagram.
Andrew Gillum.
Yeah, G-I-L-L-U-N. Yeah, so he's probably a CNN guy now.
Perfect.
Yeah, makes sense.
Sad, though.
Sad, man.
That's shitty.
I think you have to have these credentials to be on CNN. This is exactly right.
Let me see.
What did I have?
Oh, oh, oh, yes.
Oh, my goodness.
This was such a beautiful conversation.
We know that The View is completely scripted.
And this is one of the heaviest scripted shows in television.
And if you haven't seen The Morning Show on Apple +, the Jennifer Aniston Reese Witherspoon project, which is kind of a Me Too type of series.
I'm going to talk about that for one second before you go on.
This show, the morning show, I'm going to just because it's recommended by the two of us, but there's a warning I have to put out there.
It is such an inside baseball showbiz type show that most people don't like it.
My son doesn't like it, for example.
He thinks it's stupid.
Right.
And I think people who listen to us and how we critique the media and how we talk about what goes on behind the scenes.
Yeah, we try to go behind the scenes as much as possible.
I think that will help a little bit.
But it's very scripted.
And mind you, fresh news from the View crew is that Joy Behar is going to take some time off from the show to social distance herself.
I think it's more mental distancing.
But she's going to distance herself from the View.
But she's here with the full crew, and Whoopi's on here.
And they're discussing possible VP picks for Joe Biden.
Again, this is a completely scripted show, so when they get into it, you should not be surprised that that's where the conversation went.
Joe Biden looks more and more like the Democratic nominee.
There's a lot of speculation over who he'll pick as his vice president.
Stacey Abrams, Kamala Harris, Amy Klobuchar have been mentioned.
Biden.
I don't know.
What do you think?
Who is it?
There's a smorgasbord of people to pick from.
There is.
It's not like he's going to have a low amount of people to choose from.
It's going to be huge.
There's a lot of capable, interesting candidates.
You should pick a woman, I think, don't you?
Yes, absolutely.
A white or a Latino or a black woman.
Either one, I think, would work.
But it has to be a woman.
I agree.
I mean, I think he does really well with African-American voters, of course.
Already.
Although people are talking about Stacey Abrams and Kamala Harris.
But when you talk about a woman, I mean, there's been so much research done.
I know there was a woman out of Georgetown that did some research that when you have women legislators, they propose more bills, they propose more policy changes.
They just get the work done.
And so I think that would be really helpful to his ticket.
I do.
But the person that he actually should pick...
Who?
Who?
Michelle Obama, that's your favorite?
No, no, no.
A man or a woman?
It's a woman.
A woman.
Michelle, not Michelle.
Wait, is she in office?
Wait, she's not.
Is she bigger than a bread box?
Yes.
It's a bread box.
It's a place in the old days.
That's where we used to put a place.
The person who really is qualified to do it, and he cannot pick her.
Hillary Clinton.
Oh, Hillary Clinton.
Yeah.
For VP. I'm just saying, because in terms of qualifications, she is, she would be brilliant.
But because of all of the backlash, and was it you or you who told me I should watch the Hillary documentary?
I just finished watching it, and it is spectacular.
I forgot.
On Hulu.
It was really...
It was intense.
It was intense.
But it goes to show you...
Not only her qualifications, but who she really is and how she has been so misread by so many people and so misjudged and really just sort of, you know, the sins of her husband have just been imputed to her over and over and over again.
It's not just that, but it was the fact that she did not conform.
You know, what I forgot about was the beginning of their tenure in Arkansas.
Yes.
When she was sort of working side by side with him.
And they were like, well, you know you're not supposed to be doing that, right?
You need to get in the corner.
She's like, I've never been in the corner.
You can't put baby in the corner.
Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
So, again, this is a scripted show.
This was not coincidence.
You really think they could not remember who would be the ideal vice presidential pick in a seven-minute segment?
They don't let the women at The View freewheel it.
It was also a promotion of who produced that movie.
Was it anything to do with Disney, ABC? Hulu.
Yeah.
I'll bet you ABC owns most of Hulu.
They own a piece of it, yes.
So it's an obvious ABC promotion, but it's more than that.
In March 2019, Disney acquired 21st Century Fox, giving it a 60% majority stake in Hulu.
And then AT&T sold back its 10%.
Yeah, so it's basically an ABC product for the most part.
Hulu.
And they went on to, and exactly the way I expected that documentary to be, although I haven't seen all four episodes, is exactly what you'd expect.
So hold on a second.
You were going on and on about this documentary before you saw a couple of the episodes, and then you bailed so you could watch the cheerleader thing.
Yes.
Which is telling us a lot about the fact that this documentary probably is grading.
There's time for show prep and pain, and there's a time to sit with my wife and enjoy looking at children jumping around.
Jumping cheerleaders.
Jumping cheerleaders.
I just so happen to be cheerleaders.
I love Jerry.
All right.
Yes, I will complete my viewing task.
I will.
But this is a setup.
I was hoping that you'd already finished it so I don't even have to think about the possibility of watching it.
It'll be done by Thursday.
I really don't want to watch it.
It'll be done by Thursday.
Actually, you're correct.
You don't want to watch it.
You don't.
I'm watching Curb Your Enthusiasm.
Oh, aren't you up to speed?
Aren't you up to date?
Just the latest one didn't look that promising.
Oh, there's some very good, very good episodes in there.
No, I know.
All of them have been outstanding, and they're standalone.
They seem to actually be written.
There seems to be a thought behind them besides just ad-libbing a bunch of lines.
But episode eight starts off, it seems, very discombobulated.
I'm getting disappointed in the lack of the art.
Yeah.
Oh, the art of creation that they're doing?
I did watch 1917.
I'd recommend that if you want to watch movie making art.
Yeah, I do want to watch that.
It's a good movie.
I think it's definitely the movie of the year because of one thing and one thing only.
It's movie making art.
Parasite, which won the best picture, it's not even an American film, it's Korean.
I don't know what they're thinking.
It's a good story, but at some point it just becomes like a one-trick pony story.
It's just kind of a fractal of itself.
And it's not the great movie that 1917 is, or even Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, which I really enjoyed.
A lot of people didn't like, but they don't like Tarantino.
Anyway, I don't know, we're doing movie reviews.
I have some clips that we need to get to.
Okay.
Catching up with the Locusts.
Ah!
Yes, the only show that stays on the beat of the Locusts.
No one else knows what the hell is going on, but your No Agenda show and all of the associated producers.
Now, I have two different...
I have three clips, but two of them are from different stores.
I got the ITV Locust Report, which is actually kind of old.
And then CNN did a report with one of its hosts I've never seen before.
Oh!
And overnight.
It's a very minor report.
But let's listen to the...
Because it introduces...
CNN introduces what I've been waiting for, which is the locusts are part of global warming.
And it's all because of global warming.
There's these locusts, even though both of these reports talk about locusts in biblical times.
But okay...
We'll skip the biblical part and it's all about global warming.
Here's Locusts ITV. They're so frightening, they're mentioned in the scriptures as divine punishment.
Locusts have been harbingers of doom from time immemorial.
Notorious they may be, but this is exceptional.
It's 70 years since Kenya witnessed these sights and sound.
A proliferation that began in Saudi Arabia's empty quarter now stretches 3,500 miles from there across much of East Africa.
These desert locusts are among the world's great survivors.
Normally they live in the hottest, driest places on earth, but their hardiness stands them in good stead when the going gets good, and in perfect conditions like these they prosper and their numbers simply explode.
Rain is the reason.
A series of cyclones coming off the Indian Ocean have kept this region unseasonably lush.
Crops and pastures used by livestock have been devoured by ravenous swarms.
Each and every one of them can eat its own body weight each and every day.
Mama Chirito is a farmer and a mother, and three weeks ago she watched locusts eat the flowers on her mango trees.
No flowers, no mangoes.
She fears she has lost half of this year's harvest.
She told me she depended on selling her mangoes to clothe her two children and to pay for their schooling.
The same swarm consumed all the sweet potato plants that Gladys Lemery was cultivating here.
She said they tried to scare the locusts away, but that for two days they kept on coming back.
I have a little issue with this report.
The production value is completely wrong.
I mean, we need...
This is what you need.
I'm here amidst the locusts.
No, that's not a good one.
We need better locusts.
I'll prepare it for the next show.
I'll get some locust swarm sounds.
I'll get some more locusts.
You want to swarm.
How about this?
So the best report actually came, and I don't have a clip of it because it was just...
Here it is.
Sorry.
The clip of it, because it was Pat Robertson on the Christian Broadcasting Network.
He had a, because of course it's biblical if you think about it.
Oh yes, of course.
But the problem is Pat's so old now that he's doing it back and forth with the correspondent and it's just horrible to listen to.
Painful, I'm sure.
But they did give a clearer understanding of what happened.
What happened was...
In the Yemen deserts and South Saudi Arabia, that area of the peninsula, they had an inordinate amount of rain in 2018.
And then because of the conditions, the rain got these locusts all jacked up.
They started hatching.
And then a series of tornadoes.
The cyclones hit the peninsula and lifted these critters up into the air and blew them into Pakistan and into Africa.
And they landed there and then they reproduced another cycle and I think they're on their third cycle and they're in areas where they probably shouldn't be.
Some of them even got as far as China.
And besides the fact that when they're in flight they can go 100 miles a day, these critters.
And so it's become a nightmare and The global warming angle is, well, it wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for the cyclones.
Of course, yeah.
It's going to get worse.
It's going to get worse.
And we're going to hear that now by listening to CNN. Here's clip one from CNN. For three months now, swarms of desert locusts have been eating their way through East Africa.
Here in Kenya's Laikipia County, people bang utensils to try and ward off an increasing menace to their livelihoods.
All to no avail.
The locusts keep coming.
A voracious appetite means these locusts eat the equivalent of their own body weight in a single day.
And they move with speed on the changing winds.
As far as 150 kilometers, almost 100 miles a day.
Beans, maize, pasture for animals.
Nothing stands a chance.
Raising fears over food security as the farmlands are decimated.
And they keep breeding, laying their eggs in the earth in pastoral and agricultural lands.
Across East Africa, locust swarms of biblical proportions have been threatening life and grazing land and eating all the people's crops.
Here you can see these hoppers are the new generation that will pose a bigger threat to agriculture in Kenya.
The war against the locust is now in full swing.
If the swarms aren't stopped, the UN says they can multiply as much as 500 times by June.
So the Kenyan government and UN agencies are fighting back with pesticides.
In Isiolo, northeastern Kenya, villagers tell us they're seeing billions of newly hatched locusts.
How did this happen?
After years of drought, two cyclones hit East Africa in as many years.
These climate change influence phenomena replenished pasture land and filled the rivers.
But the heavy rains made the wet earth ideal breeding ground for locusts.
The situation is really, it's disparate but not hopeless.
We intend to control it, maybe in two, three months.
Despite the challenges, they've killed as many as 17 swarms in a day.
A medium-sized swarm being 30 to 40 million insects.
But for those on the front line of the locust invasion, like 47-year-old herder Chris Amerigua, the future is full of doubt.
And again, this is not produced in an exciting lead story kind of way.
It's not a lead story.
They want to talk about coronavirus and Trump.
I know, but even I'm falling asleep at the locust wheel.
Well, here's the last of it, Ben.
You won't have to wait long.
This is the kind of the back and forth where they bring in the global warming aspect of it all.
Derek Van Dam is joining me now live to talk more about it.
It's so sad how this locus epidemic is hurting people and can have a real threat, as we've said, to millions.
Without a doubt, Natalie.
And the link to climate change is clear.
If I can, maybe I can just say what it is.
He's even laughing about it.
Let's go back to that.
That was good.
You have my attention again.
The link to climate change is clear.
Let's do it.
Without a doubt, Natalie, and the link to climate change is clear.
If I can, maybe I can just say what is, at least on my mind, this is terrifying.
This is one of the most horrific things that I can imagine to see, but I can only imagine what it's like to be on the ground to see your crops and your agriculture just decimated by these swarms, these infestations of flying locusts.
I mean, how do we get to this point, right?
Well, think about what climate change does.
Right?
We have an increase in global temperatures that supercharges storms like cyclones that occurred in 2018 off the Arabian Peninsula.
And then you take climate change and that tips the scales that allows for these large-scale planetary circulations to favor these swarms of locusts.
And unfortunately, we might want to get used to these flying pests because if the science holds, it looks as if they'll become greater in numbers and become more frequent.
Climate change is real!
Oh, man!
See?
There's the angle I was waiting for.
Yes!
I'm all in on that angle.
I just love how this reporter actually says, it's obviously climate change, haha, on my mind.
That's worth playing again, that little bit.
That was very interesting here.
Without a doubt, Natalie, and the link to climate change is clear.
If I can, maybe I can just say what is, at least on my mind, this is terrifying.
This is one of the most horrific things that...
This is top, top-notch journalism.
Hey, man, it's climate change.
At least in my mind, it's real.
It's terrifying.
Blow me, CNN! I'm going to show myself the mood by donating to No Agenda.
Imagine all the people who could do that.
Oh, yeah, that'd be fab.
Yeah, on your agenda in the morning.
Well, we got a few people to thank for show 1225, starting with Alan Graves in Burnsville, Minnesota.
First time donor?
Let's see if you ask for anything new.
He's got a birthday.
That's what he's got.
Apparently he saw me on ZDTV or something.
Sir Lucas of the Lost Bits next on the list.
Alan was $134.
Sir Lucas is $128.32 in Tacoma, Washington.
Joseph Salas...
Salishour, I think.
What do you think?
I'm sorry, I'm actually getting anything else.
Don't worry about that.
In the Atlantic, Florida.
Huh, $100.
Greg Olskamp in Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada.
$99.
Keep giving it, boys.
And Gordon Bennett, $800.
Boop.
Kyle Mann, $800.
Irene Zelaya, who's got a birthday coming up in Houston, Texas, 75.
The love of my life, John, not me, but her John, has been hitting me in the mouth for a while now, so to thank you, I've celebrated his birthday.
She's donating for his birthday.
Wow, that's so cool.
He needs, or somebody needs a de-douche.
You've been de-douched.
Like other fellow listeners, we're also in a long-distance relationship, and your podcast is truly a touchstone.
That's nice.
Brandon Foster, 75.
Anonymous, 6996 in Baltimore, Maryland.
Anonymous from Baltimore.
Baron Mark Tanner, 6789 in Whittier, California, twice a month.
Savannah Wright in Lincoln, Nebraska, 6666.
Number 33, she had to donate.
Jonathan Bell, $61.30.
Thank you, Jonathan.
Michael Bromley, $60.24.
Got a long note there.
You want to check it out and see if there's anything in there we need.
Christopher Dechter, Sir Not Appearing on the Podcast, 5678.
Brandon Turner Velez, 5555 in Kingman, Arizona, Shut Up Slave, he writes.
Lyndon Kissig in Newark, Delaware, 5510.
Sir John Knight of the St.
Patrick Patron, Saint of Engineers, Heber Springs, Arkansas, 5317.
Chris Worth, 5280.
Can't buy toilet paper?
Donate to the No Agenda show instead.
Nancy Murphy, 5241.
Uh...
Yeah, this is...
I mentioned what she says here.
Nancy Murphy, 5241, says, Long lines at Safeway are one thing, but what's with those long lines at the San Bruno gun store?
Ammo, baby.
We're getting ammo!
Finally!
In case someone tries to steal their toilet paper...
That's exactly what it is.
James Williams, 51.
Wait, dear John and Adam, unborn donation credit, please dedouche me.
You've been dedouched.
First time donor, long time listener, I would like my $50 to go to my unborn grandbaby, Jackson, towards his knighthood.
Alright, then you will need to write that down and track that yourself.
Or Jackson should.
Jackson, start writing this down.
Put the kid to work.
Please call out his mom and dad as douchebags.
Douchebags!
Douchebags Jake and Jordan.
I hit them in the mouth years ago.
Today is Jake's birthday, too.
He's on the list.
We all love the show.
Learned so much from you guys.
By the way, love you guys.
Thank you very much, James Williams.
Oh, the following people now are $50 donors, name and location, if applicable.
Thomas McKelvey, one of the two.
50.
Chris Slowinski, Sir Chris Slowinski.
Sherwood Park, Alberta.
Was once the richest part of Canada and is now poor.
50.
Mark Johnson, Sir Maniac of Colorado, Aurora, Colorado.
Dame Patricia Worthington, back from Miami.
Baronet Sir Lineman of the Net in Anna, Illinois, 50.
Michael Ruhlin, 50.
Michael Burlett in Odessa, Florida.
Brandon Savoy in Port Orchard, Washington, a regular.
Sir Jerry Wingenroth in Saugus, California.
And last but not least, Daniel Galloway in Marietta, Georgia.
I want to thank all these folks for contributing to and producing show 1225.
And we also profusely thank those who donated under $50, which we do not read out for brevity, but also people like the anonymous aspect of that.
That's why they do $49.99.
And those are a lot of our subscriptions.
You can find more about those subscriptions, and you can sign up for one.
We'd really appreciate it.
Just go to dvorak.org.
And again, thank you all for producing the best podcast in the universe.
And I should mention something, just to mention it.
We have a make good.
No, no, I wanted to mention that our fantastic promotion of the Pi Day did produce 31.41 donations, three of them.
Oh, nice.
So I want to mention, I want to thank all those folks.
Some people care about Pi.
Helping out.
Yes.
Now, there was something that came in, this make good.
Yeah, there's a make-up on the email.
Let me understand.
I'm going to read this out.
John asked you, that's me, to give Renee DuPont, now Dame Chardonnay of the Lillanu Grapefields, karma for being inconvenienced, as he described, but I think she's been shortchanged.
The prescribed remedy for missing a knighthood is to declare the person a black knight.
Do we not have black dames?
If not, is there similar honorific in its place?
I think Black Dame, is that appropriate in this case?
Is that what happened?
Well, if that's what she wants, I think you have to, I think, no, I think, yeah, you could be a Black Dame.
Anyway, Bob Osegueta did send an email in, by the way, just to mention, doesn't really say anything.
So, Bob, thanks for the links.
I don't know what to do about that.
I mean, yes, it was our screw-up, and she should have been damed earlier, and if she was a knight, it would have been a black knight.
How about a dark dame?
A black dame is not a moniker that is normal.
Right, right.
I don't know what to say.
Yeah, I understand, because a black knight is an actual thing, and a black dame just sounds weird.
No, it sounds like you're, you know, it sounds racial.
Yes.
Black lady of the night.
We're going down a hole.
All right.
Well, I am laying that before the peerage committee and it can remain in a bayous.
Well, I can tell you what the peerage committee is going to say.
Okay.
Not going to happen.
She's going to be the dame that she is.
We call her Dame Plus.
Then she sounds like a fat girl.
No, there's nothing you can do.
You really can't do too much variation.
A recommendation is we should probably stop this convo while we're still ahead, skis?
Because that's probably a little bit better.
Thank you, though, all of you for your courage and for those who need it.
Jobs, jobs, jobs, and jobs.
Let's vote for jobs!
You've got.
We're so fired.
Here we go.
It is the 15th of March, the Ides of March.
Amanda Monroe says happy birthday to her husband, Justin Monroe.
He turned 34 on the 12th of March.
Emily Geither, happy birthday to her smoking hot husband, Jed, 37 years old on Tuesday.
Alan Graves turns 34 today.
Irene Zelaya says happy birthday to her boyfriend, John.
He's also celebrating on the 17th.
And James Williams says happy birthday to Jake.
We say happy birthday to everybody.
On behalf of the staff and management of the best podcasts in the universe!
Come gather round, douchebag, producer and slave As we all thank your brothers and sisters who gave And some of them nights, some of them days Sir Scott of the Armory here in Austin, Texas, requested his title change.
He is now, he becomes a baron, and in fact, he is the Black Baron of the No Agenda Armory, and he wanted the Bob Dylan title change music, so we obviously will take care of that.
I'm sorry, I missed the meetup.
I was very tired Thursday, so I did not make it out to the meetup.
I saw they had, you know, six or seven people.
Which is good, and of course I will meet up with Black Baron Scott later this week to get my venison, because he actually brought it to the meetup, so I'll get that from him.
And another title change is Dame Laura, as we heard earlier, she now ups her status to that of Baronetess, and that is thanks to an additional $1,000 in donations for producing the No Agenda show.
Thank you all very much.
Congratulations with those titles.
It is indeed just like a party and parties were held.
We don't give a crap about now coronavirus.
We just meet up with amygdalas in a nice shape.
Charlotte, North Carolina.
Hey, thank you for your courage.
This is Bill Cameron at the Charlotte Meetup.
Six of us showed up.
We're having a great time.
I do feel a little queasy because everyone shook my hand, but we'll see.
In the morning from Sir Kevin Dills, Viscount of Charlotte, thank you for your courage.
In the morning, John and Adam, this is Sir Hey Moose.
We are definitely flexing the corona resistance model here with our small amygdalas.
In the morning, this is Sir Psychopath, and we're all going to die, just not today.
In the morning, it's Ben Whiproat.
We all made it here at the Strong Among Us with the small amygdalas.
Thank you for your courage.
We're all covered in COVID in the morning.
Covered in COVID. This is future Sir Boiled Peanut.
Thanks.
In the morning.
I like these reports.
And do you hear how people sound like they're having fun?
Boiled peanut.
Covered in COVID. Boiled peanut.
What a name.
Let's go to Denver.
George Prado reporting to you from Local 5280.
Apparently they have the Joe Biden crew is in Denver, everybody.
They've done the audio for the Denver meetup.
George Prado reporting to you from Local 5280 here in Denver.
I'm Brittany Pfiffner.
Hello.
Hello.
I'm Tom, Adam and John, in the morning.
Hello, Adam.
Hello, John.
This is Mark Mensik.
Thank you for your courage.
Sir Maniac of Colorado says, in the morning.
This is art producer Mountain Jay.
Thank you for your courage.
This is Sam from Denver.
This is Jeff.
I'm the Viscount of Utopia.
In the morning.
This is Rob.
Train's good.
Plane's bad.
In the morning!
Love the audio, guys.
Keep it up.
I love this show!
Mississippi!
This is the Rocket Ranch.
This was...
Is it called Rocket?
Yeah, the Rocket Ranch Meetup.
There's a place where rockets are launched or were launched, and they had a meetup, of course!
In the morning, this is Sir Rocketman, Baron of the Bay, KG5ZFA, Black 6, John Horner.
We are here at the Mississippi Rocket...
I mean, when you hear this, we're not a cult.
We're not a cult.
K5ACC Black 6F in the morning.
This is the Rocket Man, Baron of the Bay, KG5ZFA Black 6, John Horner.
We are here at the Mississippi Rocket Ranch Meetup.
We just got done taking a tour of the test facility.
I'm going to pass this around to the other knights and producers in attendance.
In the morning, this is Sir Scott on the Rocks, newly knighted.
In the morning, this is Sir Foreman.
Thank you for your courage.
In the morning, this is douchebag Jacques Delisle, and I hear you back to John.
Alright, we're going to get the douchebag to maybe send another donation here soon.
In the morning, everybody.
Thank you all for your courage.
No, thank you for your courage.
Yeah, we're a tribe, actually.
I shouldn't say cult.
We are a total tribe.
A quick rundown of meetups that are taking place today and tomorrow.
Brand new one for today.
A last minute meetup.
Meet and greet.
This is Malta.
Wow, if you're still up in Malta, La Tartine at the Mosta Dome next to St.
Mary's Pharmacy, Stu was organizing.
I don't know if this came in on time, but it certainly is on noagendameetups.com.
Malta, yeah, we are bad.
We are global.
Tonight, in Vegas, another last-minute meetup.
I think people are doing last-minute meetups because they have an urge to be with sane people, not toilet preppers.
So I understand this last-minute meetup stuff.
I really do, and I think that's good.
Atomic Liquors is where this will be held.
Look for the girl in a jeans jacket and white sneakers.
She's in town for a work trip.
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more.
Catherine is organizing in Vegas!
Tonight at 6 o'clock.
Monday night, the meetup at CSEAC. I don't think this can be continued.
This meetup seems like it might be off.
This is on the Royal Caribbean Oasis of the Seas.
2pm tomorrow.
I have a feeling this may not happen.
I thought everything was cancelled, but you never know.
So keep an eye on NoAgendaMeetups.com.
If it does indeed happen, the Oasis of the Sea will be available for you to meet up in the Schooner Bar, Deck 6.
On day two, March 16th, Dame Meowdison and Douchebag Dave.
Well, they are legit.
There's just two of them there.
Yeah, there'll be two.
And then just coming up, let me see, the 21st.
So I don't have anything this week, I don't think.
The 21st, San Diego.
Western New York, Springfield, Missouri, Dallas, Eastern North Carolina, and LAX, the 22nd, Philly Local 76, the 28th, Rochester, New York.
And they just continue.
Go to NoAgendaMeetups.com for more information.
If you want to know about a meetup that you'd like to attend, you can get all the details there.
It's free.
It's a great service.
Part of our Value for Value Network.
And if there's nothing there that you like, all you have to do is start one yourself.
No Agenda Meetups, they are like a party!
Sometimes you want to go hang out with all the nights and days.
You want to be where you want me.
Drink it or hail the flame.
You want to be where everybody feels the same.
It's like a party.
So I do have one last sequence of clips to share.
Regarding the Green Deal.
Not the Green New Deal, but the Green Deal in the European Union.
And the Green Deal is better known as the European Union Climate Law.
This is the purported to be 250 billion euro boondoggle, led by my friend, Frans Timmermans.
I say my friend because I met him on a previous radio show.
He used to accompany the Queen of the Netherlands to all the Bilderberg meetings.
He is a sales guy.
He's actually, I think he's only one or two years older than I am.
He's 56 or 57, but he looks 65 with his damn beard.
He's like, bro.
So I have a lot of respect for this guy.
Not for what he's doing, but I really like him.
I like how he operates.
You know, when I called him out as a Bilderberger, he went wink-wink, nudge-nudge.
It's important you keep tracking that.
So maybe he wants to kill me, but I'm following him, and I'd like to do a little overview of what the European Union climate law is.
It was introduced by the brand new leader of the European Union, Van der Leyen.
She is the head of Starfleet Command, and here she is.
I'm pleased to tell you that the Commission has just adopted our proposal for the first ever European climate law.
This proposal sets in stone our objective to be climate neutral in 2050.
And 2050 is no longer impossible distant to imagine, and my children will be a bit younger than I am now when we have 2050, so as I have a glimpse of the possible environment they will likely experience, well, this glimpse is pretty sobering if we don't act now.
And the science is very clear.
Climate is part of the natural world that sustains us, and this natural world is severely endangered.
It is high time to act, and this climate law is part of the European contribution to this action.
It will be our compass for the next 30 years, and it will guide us every step on the way as we build a sustainable new growth model.
So, very important what she says at the end there.
Now, I just want to play that again so people can hear exactly what she said at the very end.
She says, this is important for the European Union.
Why?
It will be our compass for the next 30 years.
And it will guide us every step on the way as we build a sustainable new growth model.
It's a new growth model.
Exactly.
So we're just going to replace things with new things.
So we replace the old gasoline cars with battery cars.
It doesn't matter if it saves the environment.
It's a new growth model.
And I like her THs.
For a European, her growth came out pretty good.
Usually it sounds more like gross, gross model.
Yeah, she used the F. Yeah, she's got it.
Growth model.
Growth model.
What you notice, perhaps, is that she spoke of 2050.
This is not exactly in line with the existential crisis that is going to kill us by 2030.
Which is what Greta Thunberg has been calling for.
Luckily, when Franz Timmermans, Bilderberger globalist extraordinaire, and Green Deal czar of the European Union came in to present his case, he made sure to let everybody know Greta was a part of this.
We were inspired by grassroots movements.
As you know, this morning, President von der Leyen had invited Greta Thunberg to assist at the beginning of the college meeting and to share her view with us.
And as I said to her this morning, I'm sure that without the movement she has inspired and is leading, probably today we would not have a great deal.
And probably today I would not be talking about something that is quite unique and quite forward-looking, this climate law.
I've listened carefully to Greta and the message I take away from her words is this planet doesn't belong to those in power or the generations in power.
It belongs to the whole of humanity.
And I feel a strong responsibility.
I have kids.
In her generation, I'm fortunate enough to have kids in the millennial generation and in the generation Z, and I feel strong responsibility that together with them, we should make sure we make a success of European climate neutrality by 2050.
So they're going to complete climate neutrality by 2050.
I've read the law, it's hundreds of pages.
Interestingly, there's no numbers.
Well, actually, before we explain the numbers, he had a completely honest moment about climate change, if you believe in climate change and all this.
I like this guy for this very reason.
Listen to this.
And as I could repeat time and time again, when people are saying this is about saving the planet, no, it's not.
The planet can take care of itself.
And if we're too much of a nuisance, the planet will get rid of us like the planet got rid of other species before.
This is about saving humanity.
This is about creating the right conditions so that humanity can live in balance with its natural environments in a way that is equitable and in a way that does not say...
To those in the world who aspire to our level of life, who aspire to live like us, to say to them, no, that's not possible, because Mother Earth could not afford that.
Yes, she can.
If we adapt, if we do this, if we stick to this road, then we can reach this.
This is a problem that is huge, this is existential, but it's also a problem that can be fixed.
Thank you very much.
Yes, so there you go.
That's a good way to put it.
We all got to chip in or we're all going to die by 2050.
And then, and this is what I was leading up to earlier, he did a classic move.
It's almost like a Nancy Pelosi move, only a little bit better.
They've passed this law.
The law is passed.
What is not in there is the impact.
And impact is an important part of any law.
What will the results be?
And most importantly, what will it cost?
Well, they did things differently this time in the EU. Of course, many people are keen, as I've seen everywhere, to hear the Commission's 2030 targets.
To those, I say that our work to assess the impact of the new 2030 target has started and is ongoing.
And as you know, we want to find out what the best landing zone is if we want to get from 50% towards 55% emissions cuts in 2030.
To do that will require huge efforts by all, and that is why we don't want to make thoroughness and detail the victim of political expediency.
I'm absolutely convinced.
If the Commission were to today announce a number, a figure, that has not been fully assessed for impact, then we would have an endless discussion over many months whether the Commission is right, whether the assumptions are correct, whether the facts are correct, etc., And we would lose a lot of time.
So to those who say, when you come at the end of the summer with your number, you've lost time, I would say, with my experience, for instance, with the classic strategy, if you do an impact assessment so that the facts are no longer disputed, you can move quicker also in the legislative process.
So once we've done this work, we will propose an amendment to the climate law that we are presenting today, and we will put the 2030 target in there as well.
This is the sign of the contract.
We'll worry about the details afterwards.
It's like Pelosi.
You got to pass the bill to find out what's in it.
Hey, first put it into law so then we can figure out how much we're going to do with it.
And we'll just put an amendment.
That is fantastic.
I love this guy.
He's got brown shoes and everything.
This mofo can sell!
I really hope to get an interview with him.
I would love to speak with him.
Because he understands us, too.
He understands us.
He gets us.
I really am trying hard to get a...
But now he's like, big man, this is a top gig.
He has an unlimited budget.
He has 50, 60 people on a team.
And it's law.
Hello, hello, farmers.
Are you ready for more protests?
Because you're going to have to do it when you figure out what these jamokes are doing.
And that's your climate update.
Pretty bad.
It's great.
I have a couple things, but we're going to put them off.
But I did want to mention something, which was the ninth that was supposed to be, this is the last week, Corey Feldman's movie.
Yeah, the Tale of Two Corys or whatever it is.
Yeah, I finally did some research.
You know, he's released this movie a couple of times.
One time in particular was outlined, I think this was in 2007, 2013, 2016.
I think it was the 2016 release of the movie where he He's going to stream it.
You had to pay 20 bucks and it crapped out and it was glitchy.
So they couldn't do it.
You did not just use the G word in my presence.
I did.
And then apparently the same thing he releases.
Oh no, it was like he couldn't get it.
It was hackers.
Keeping the movie from being released.
Poor Corey.
And so this is just a never-ending.
He keeps adding new names to his list of abusers as they die.
And so all the speculation about why the CEO of Disney quit.
None of that panned out.
Not a single bit.
Nothing panned out.
And it's like, okay, I think we're tired of this.
This is reminding me now of the guy who has this guy, Moser.
I can't remember his name, but I first heard about him in the 70s, I think, and then the 80s.
He keeps about every so – as soon as you forget, it takes a long time to forget this, but about every five, six, seven years, he releases a flying car.
It's out of Sacramento.
Yes.
And so this flying car he's going to release.
The last time I heard of this was a number of years back where the flying car is now more feasible because of computers.
Uh-huh.
And, you know, again, this is the same thing.
You've got some gimmick that you make money on somehow, and then you keep doing it over and over again.
Pretty much the same blueprint.
So this Corey Feldman thing, you might as well just forget about it.
It's not even in the picture anymore.
It's just no good.
Yeah, and I was anticipating.
I mean, apparently there's something in there about Charlie Sheen that he raped Corey Haim, and Crisco was involved.
Yeah, supposedly.
Charlie Sheen denies this.
Haim is dead.
And he brought a new person into the list of abusers who's also just died recently.
And, you know, it's just, this is not any good.
Do you have an end-of-show ISO? I didn't get any ISOs.
You know, there's just something about you that pisses me off.
I have that?
From the Hillary documentary?
That's all I really have.
I'm thrilled and excited.
I'm starting to think, oh my gosh.
I don't have anything good.
The one I would still like to see is the end of show ISO, which you haven't used.
Okay.
Is the I'm the president and I can do anything, the Bernie Sanders ISO. It's long.
I think we did use it.
I think you slipped into the show, but I don't know if you used it as the end of show.
It's still a winner.
Powerful.
Was it most powerful man in the world, I think?
You can do anything.
Yeah.
Was that your ISO? Oh, no.
I may have been.
Well, this is problematic.
We've got some isos here that I've got backed up.
I can't find it the most...
Well, just do stop the hammering then.
You can't go wrong.
Stop the hammering it is.
Good.
Stop the hammering is probably good.
Especially with the toilet preppers.
Toilet preppers.
Yes.
Alright everybody, that will do it.
Your amygdala should be perfect size if it wasn't already.
And I hope we have better news stories if they don't just play wall-to-wall Corona over the next news cycle.
We've got four days of news coming, and it's like, gosh, something?
Nah.
April 6th, everybody, mark it down.
This is when we'll be out of this.
Grumpy old Ben's coming up on NoAgendaStream.com after this.
We have a couple of end-of-show mixes.
Thor brought us a nice Corona song, which I'll play a bit of.
Thank you, John Fletcher.
Fletcher!
Professor Jones and Tom Starkweather.
And coming to you from Opportunity Zone 33 here, the capital of the drone star state, Austin, Texas.
FEMA Region No.
6 in the governmental maps.
In the morning, everybody, I'm Adam Curry.
And from northern Silicon Valley, where the traffic is dynamite light.
We'll be back on Thursday, the second one of the week.
Remember us at thevorak.org slash NA. Until then...
Keep your amygdala small, and adios mofos!
and such it's getting late have you seen the day Is the public really full of fear?
Bunny was on top, Joe is ready to flop, is Hillary Clinton near?
Wall Street is jumping, and the stocks there are dumping all the bailout time of year.
Pandemic by who?
Manufacturing new depression, there are food lines here.
Whoa!
Don't give us none of your agitation, you need a little discipline.
COVID-19's the excuse, now never let the fans back in.
Shutting down the trains and the airports too, want to impose some fright.
The least eight was designed for black Now we're determined on white On white Ooh Corona, Wuhan, oh I wanna take you Korea, Italia, come on baby mama Pandemic, no panic, baby Why don't we go .
You measure your temperature.
There's a fever, it's your doom.
The doctors burrowed round in the emergency room.
Bodies everywhere.
Washing your hands up at half a chance.
You get pneumonia and the doctor gives you oxygen.
Down in the corona, corona, oh, I wanna take ya.
Korea, Italia, Korea.
Come on baby mama.
Pandemic, don't panic.
Ooh, I want to take you down to Africa.
We'll get things fast and then we'll take it slow.
That's where we want to go.
Way down in Africa.
Moraine, are you there?
Maureen, are you there?
But here's the deal.
No hidden bills, etc.
And up the ante on what we have to do.
There's much we can do because in the first hundred days, invite the major polluters in the country and the major abusers of endangered species to the United States of America.
Maureen, are you there?
Well, I'm sorry this has been such a disjointed effort here because of the connections, but there's a lot more to say, but I've already probably said too much to you.
Maureen, are you there?
But even I can't do that for another two years, another year between now and November.
Or actually January.
Maureen, are you there?
Clunk, clunk, here we go.
I'm thrilled and excited.
I'm starting to think, oh my gosh, oh my gosh.
Okay, I can shift a little bit toward a more expected appearance.
And then I had some friends say, well, you know, I've got ideas about your hair and ideas about your clothes.
I violated them, you know, from the very beginning.
Okay, I can, you know, shift a little bit.
And here's what I think.
You better support me.
You better support me.
You know, there's just something about you that pisses me off.
He was in Congress for years.
Who cares about the Congress?
Years.
Hey!
Hey!
He had one senator support him.
Hey!
Hey!
Nobody likes him.
Nobody wants to work with him.
He got nothing done.
I can do anything I want.
I want.
It was nuts.
It was all just baloney and I feel so bad that, you know, people got sucked into it.
Honestly, Bernie just drove me crazy.
I don't think anybody had any idea that he had fallen into a depression because the crushing intensity.
Hey! Hey!
Hey!
And I now know he already knew what he was going to do.
He knew too much.
Ridiculous conspiracy theories.
The best podcast in the universe!
Adios.
Mofo.
Dvorak.org.
Slash.
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