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Dec. 23, 2012 - No Agenda

02:47:21

472: Conheads in Mexico

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	Schneller!
	Schneller!
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Sunday, December 23rd, 2012.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation media assassination episode 472.
	This is no agenda.
	Welcome to the other side of the apocalypse, coming to you from Gitmo Nation lowlands, day 17, living in exile in Amsterdam.
	In the morning, everybody.
	I'm I'm Adam Curry.
	And from the Pacific Northwest Buzzkill Bunker, where we're being attacked by complete docks from Japan, I'm John C. Devorak.
	It's Crackbott and Buzzkill.
	In the morning.
	What are you being attacked by?
	Docks.
	Docks?
	Docks.
	Docks?
	An entire dock, yeah.
	A whole dock.
	A dock?
	It's like the Atlantic City boardwalk washed up on shore.
	Oh, you mean a dock?
	So you mean the actual docks from Fukushima?
	Yeah.
	No.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Wow.
	So that really did happen, that thing there, then.
	Here's the story so far.
	There goes that conspiracy theory.
	Damn.
	It actually happened.
	Either that or just shipping their docks over here.
	Anyway, so there's an entire dock.
	It's about, I don't know, a quarter.
	It's huge.
	It's like a full dock and it's intact with the deck and everything.
	Wow.
	Does it have like a boat attached to it or is it just a dock?
	Just a dock.
	And so they, I'm sure there were boats at some point.
	But anyway, so the dock rolled up on shore and intact.
	And they just, and they started, they checked it out and they had, they decided, I said, why don't they just put the thing up?
	They had to destroy it by burning it because of all these vermin and things.
	I guess some sort of invasive barnacles or something on the thing.
	But is there still, are there still pieces of it left?
	Because I have something you need to do.
	You and Buzzkill Jr.
	have got a little expedition for you.
	I've got a little...
	Well, it's a problem.
	What do you mean, what's the problem?
	What happened is they had one of these really big high tides.
	Yeah.
	And so it picked the dock up and moved it down the coast to someplace else.
	So now it's sitting somewhere outside of Forks.
	Because I'd love for you to go down there with your Geiger counters and see if that's radioactive.
	Well, I don't have...
	I do have a Geiger counter up here.
	Yeah, I'm not going there.
	Forget it.
	It's too far to go.
	You guys travel with that stuff.
	I know you do.
	I know you do.
	Hey, good news, John.
	Very good news.
	Yeah?
	The meme is spreading.
	Children around the world this Christmas are all saying one thing.
	Please don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	It's spreading.
	It's now in the UK. The kids are all aware of Hillary Clinton eating children.
	Pretty, pretty.
	I love it.
	Here's Lizzie in case you missed the original.
	Merry Christmas, Adam and John.
	Oops, I had the wrong one.
	This is the one I meant.
	Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	Hey, you've got to be real careful whatever you're doing with your mic there.
	Are you moving stuff around, John?
	Yeah, I was.
	Yeah, okay, you can't really do that too much.
	It makes noise like this?
	No, it's really bad when you do that.
	No, I'm not going to do it.
	So let me give you a little update here in the shittisonry of Gitmo Nation lowlands, where we are living day 17 in exile for me.
	For Ms.
	Mickey, it is day 27 plus 14.
	She's day 36, I think.
	But True Exile, Day 17.
	And it is the car wash without an end.
	We have not seen a blue sky since I've been here.
	It is just gray.
	It is raining.
	There is mist.
	I mean, you don't know when to go to bed or when to wake up.
	It's like living in Scandinavia.
	In fact, there should be backup Scandinavians here.
	It's literally just gray.
	All day, all night, gray.
	See, whatever you're doing now, stop doing that.
	I'm trying to get myself comfortable.
	We spend like 10 minutes before the show.
	That's the time to get comfortable, not during the show.
	I never got comfortable.
	Okay, alright.
	But there are crazy things that go on here.
	So would you like some observations from the lowlands, from Euroland, from the land of make-believe over here?
	Well, yeah, anything but the weather report.
	Okay.
	So they have this thing, and they do it every single year, and it's called the Glass House.
	And this is a very interesting phenomenon.
	So a bunch of disc jockeys from the government-run radio station, they build a glass house somewhere in the Netherlands, in the lowlands.
	I forget where it is this year.
	But usually on some square of some city or town.
	And then they broadcast from this for like two weeks without any food.
	And this is for a good cause.
	And then they raise money for the Red Cross.
	And it's the weirdest thing, because they have their own television channel.
	First of all, DJs typically are not meant to be seen.
	It's just like...
	Whoever started this whole movement of webcams and look at the disc jockey, it's like you've ruined radio forever.
	No, I agree with that.
	It's so dumb.
	I blame Howard Stern.
	It's an ego thing.
	In fact, that's kind of where I'm going with this whole glass house thing.
	It's an ego thing.
	These disc jockeys are like, oh yeah, we're doing this for the good cause.
	Bull crap.
	You love having all the fans standing outside.
	Oh, we raised a million euros.
	For what?
	So they can build a bigger building, the Red Cross?
	Have you guys ever looked into the jacked up crap those people are all about?
	Look at their building and tell me where the money is.
	Oh no, it's so good.
	We're doing something.
	It's kind of the Dutch disc jockey version of turning your Twitter icon a different color to do something for somebody somewhere.
	It's just...
	That's it?
	It's very irritating to me because it's consistently, and everyone's talking about, hey, have you seen the guys in the glass house?
	They're so awesome, aren't they?
	No, they're not awesome.
	They're a bunch of douchebags sitting in a beautifully built glass studio.
	The whole operation by itself, I'm sure, cost half a million just to pull off.
	And then we raised a million and a half for the Red Cross.
	This country, they still think that they did a great job for Haiti.
	The idiots.
	I'm a little down here.
	And then, I think we've talked about this before, but I can't get any decent regular food here.
	In the restaurant, yeah.
	All you've got to do is complain.
	It's what it is, John.
	You want to go get some good food, they don't have that in the supermarket.
	Unless you go to a so-called biological supermarket.
	Have you ever heard of such a stupid branding exercise?
	Is it in a tree?
	Yeah.
	It's a separate supermarket, and it's going to be twice as expensive, and it says we're a biological supermarket.
	Well, of course you're a biological supermarket.
	The stuff comes from anything in biology, I'm sure, but I guess that is some brand that means that it's really healthy, and it's not.
	It's just the same crap in different packaging and more expensive.
	And of course, Miss Mickey's looking for stuff without gluten.
	Well, you know, we have like...
	You can't get a pancake mix without gluten stuff.
	No wonder the people are sick here.
	They're eating crap.
	They're living in gray, eating crap, and they're watching a glass house full of ugly disc jockeys.
	Welcome to my life.
	Merry Christmas to you, too, Adam.
	And in the morning to you, John C. Dvorak.
	And in the morning to you, and in the morning to all ships and sea, boots on the ground, feet in the air, subs in the water, and all the dames and knights out there.
	Yes, and of course, all of our shittisons, the human resources in our chat room, noagendastream.com, noagendachat.net, all lined up, ready to go, charged up, actually, and of course, thanks to Tice Browers.
	A fine artist here from the lowlands who provided the art for the previous episode.
	Very hard for us to choose last time because when it rains it pours it just had so much coming in and we always appreciate what the artists do.
	Please check out all the entries at noagendaartgenerator.com and I'm sure that there's other great uses for some of the art that pops up.
	It's not just for album art.
	You can use it for all kinds of stuff.
	You didn't send out a newsletter, did you?
	You mean I didn't send the Adam Curry update in Amsterdam?
	No, just anything.
	No, I was traveling.
	Oh, how were your travels?
	Did you enjoy the first-class premium service with a coach ticket and your valet service from the TSA? I drove.
	Really?
	Wow.
	Why would you do that?
	Well, it saves me a fortune for one thing, and I have a car to drive around, and there's a lot of reasons.
	Really?
	Is it that much cheaper just to drive up?
	I didn't realize.
	I thought that...
	Well, I cost...
	Well, actually, yeah, it is.
	It costs about $85 to drive.
	I calculated this.
	It costs about $85 or $90 to drive up at the most.
	Yeah.
	And then...
	With the airline during the holidays, it would be $200 plus another $200 for a car.
	So it's $400 versus $90.
	And...
	It's a nightmare.
	The difference is I can load the car up with presents.
	Oh, right.
	Right.
	Yeah.
	Did you bring everyone...
	So I can haul a bunch of stuff up here, and then I can also haul a bunch of stuff back.
	Right.
	So...
	Wait, you're expecting...
	You can't really put this stuff on the airplane.
	You're expecting to receive gifts?
	Is that...
	You really think you're going to get gifts, Papa?
	No.
	No, there's some stuff in this wine cellar up here that I've got to move down.
	I can't do it any other way but drive it.
	Okay.
	So what did you get everybody?
	What presents did you get them?
	It's sad they haven't been opened.
	I know.
	I'm going to say.
	I know.
	Well, then I don't listen.
	A lot of stuff.
	Okay.
	I've got to congratulate you, man.
	You nailed it.
	You really, really nailed it.
	It was episode 469.
	I had to go back because I wanted to pull the clip.
	This came out in the news earlier this week.
	The Senate approved an amendment to the NDAA last month that would prevent the military from imprisoning any U.S. citizen or permanent resident deemed a terrorism suspect without charge or trial.
	But according to the New York Times, congressional negotiators have dropped the provision in the effort to merge the bill's House and Senate versions.
	The overall Defense Authorization Act is expected to come up for a vote this week.
	So, of course, this vote came up and that passed and what was removed from the combined House and Senate bill is the actual, you know, the black bagging of American citizens and just hauling them off into jail.
	And I was like, oh my God, I think this is what you discovered when you heard Harry Reid jump in Do one of those morning sessions where you're watching C-SPAN. And I want to play that again.
	And if you listen to it, I think this is exactly when it happened.
	Because everyone's saying, oh, we don't know when it happened.
	We don't know who took that out of the bill.
	We have no idea.
	It just, all of a sudden, it just wasn't there.
	And then we passed it and we all had to go home.
	And there you have it.
	Screw you, citizens.
	Burn this summer.
	The Miller Homestead Fire burned 160,000 acres.
	So this was the guy just talking on the floor, and then Harry Reid comes in and literally will talk about these amendments taken in, taken out, and he talks really fast, and there's a word that I can't understand that maybe you can help me with.
	Or 250 square miles.
	The majority leaders recognize.
	Could I ask my friend to yield for unanimous consent request and he would have the floor as soon as I finish?
	Absolutely.
	Sorry to do that.
	Without objections to order.
	Madam President, I ask unanimous consent that when the Senate receives the papers with respect to H.R. 4310.
	So he's received the papers with respect to H.R. 4310, which is the National Defense Authorization Act for 2013.
	The Senate's passage of H.R. 4310 as amended be evitiated.
	As amended be evitiated.
	What is the word?
	I couldn't find this word, John.
	Evitiated?
	Have you ever heard of this word?
	Eviscerated?
	Well, eviscerated means to gut something.
	But I don't think he says that.
	He says it a couple more times.
	I think he's saying evisciated.
	I could not find this word.
	Without objections.
	And further, I ask unanimous consent that the adoption of the sentiment be evisciated.
	Evisciated?
	What is evisciated?
	You sure he's not saying eviscerated?
	Okay, well, what's the definition of eviscerated then?
	Well, it means to take the guts out.
	Why don't you play that again?
	I can barely hear it.
	I can turn it all up.
	Are the clips just too soft?
	Do you need it to be louder?
	No, no, no.
	I got everything turned down, but I just want to hear him again say that word, because I think it's just his pronunciation of a different word.
	Okay, maybe.
	And further, I ask you, on his consent, that the adoption of the sentiment be evitiated, and that the amendment, the text of S... Evitiated?
	You're saying evitiated?
	Well, whatever the case is, he somehow took that amendment out.
	If the word is initiated...
	With unanimous consent of the three people there.
	Exactly.
	And that the amendment, the text of S-3425 as amended by the Senate be modified with the changes that are at the desk.
	That no other amendments be in order and the Senate proceed to vote in relation to the amendment as modified.
	that if the substitute amendment is modified, is agreed to, H.R. 4310 as amended be read a third time and passed.
	Finally, that the previous request with respect to the Senate's request for conference, including the appointment of conference, be agreed to, with all above occurring with no intervening action or debate.
	That, to me, is exactly what happened.
	It doesn't sound like it.
	Like, just take all this stuff out.
	Everyone's cool.
	We're all good.
	And boom.
	Harry Reid is the guy who did it, John.
	And you caught it!
	Yeah, it was a weird fluke that I caught it.
	But, you know, he's not obviously the guy who did it.
	It's his overlords who told him to do it for some reason.
	Obviously, obviously.
	But still, it's like...
	Vitiate.
	Yeah, they snuck that back in.
	It's hilarious.
	Could vitiate be the word?
	Is that a word?
	I don't know.
	I don't know.
	My advice to you is to get to the congressional record, find that moment where Harry Reid jumps in.
	It was during open session.
	And just read the word.
	Where do you find this?
	On the Federal Register?
	I don't think so.
	Yeah, it has to be.
	Everything that they say in the Congress is in the Federal Register.
	Every word.
	If it's vitiate, V-I-T-I-A-T-E, then that means spoil or impair the quality or efficiency of, which would make a lot of sense.
	And we'd like to spoil this.
	We'd like to impair the quality for the citizens of America.
	We'd like to really dumb that down a little bit, please.
	All right.
	I have not seen this pop up in the Federal Register.
	I have seen a lot of other stuff pop up in the Federal Register.
	Some interesting stuff.
	I don't think this stuff pops up immediately.
	No, it does not.
	But I do have some stuff from the Federal Register.
	We sold some gunk to Japan.
	An upgrade, actually.
	We sold an upgrade of major defense equipment.
	$421 million.
	Which consists, as far as I can tell, mainly of computer monitors.
	Which seems like a good deal to me.
	Wait a minute, hold on a second.
	I got it here.
	We sold, we, the United States, but we don't make computer monitors?
	No, no.
	This is a very good point.
	Here's how it works.
	So the contractor is, who are the guys in New Jersey?
	Raytheon, I think.
	They get the $421 million contract.
	But if you read this, literally, it says, because you have to request to sell weaponry, it's the Aegis, A-E-G-I-S, Weapon System Upgrade, as the government of Japan has requested a possible sale for the upgrade of previously provided Aegis combat systems as part of as the government of Japan has requested a possible sale for the upgrade of previously provided Aegis combat systems as part of
	And then it literally says, here's what we're selling, the Aegis System Weapons Computer Program, so that's a disk, a software, it's a thumb drive, multi-mission signal processors, which is just some chips, I guess, two common processor systems, two sets of two common processor systems, two sets of common display systems, tri-screen display consoles, display processor cabinets, video wall screen and projection system, flat panel displays, distributed video systems,
	flat panel displays, These are all at the top of the list.
	It's not like, you know, I'm skipping around.
	This is the list.
	Two sets of ANS-PQ15 digital video distribution systems.
	It seems to be they're just selling fiber optic distribution boxes, junction boxes.
	You're selling a bunch of expensive digital displays.
	Well, I don't know.
	The Aegis system, I don't even know for sure that the thing works.
	That's the Navy's anti-missile defense system.
	It's very expensive.
	Yeah, $421 million just for the upgrade, which I think really the software is the cost, and then they're just throwing in some goodies.
	It has to be the software, right?
	That would be the main cost.
	I don't see what else can be so expensive.
	Yeah, I guess.
	I don't know.
	I think it's a great business to be in.
	We should be in that business.
	Guess what?
	We're not going to be in that business ever.
	It's not going to happen.
	While we're at it, we should probably thank some executive producers for today's pre-Christmas show.
	In fact, this is a holiday for most people, so hopefully we have some listeners.
	Well, we do have some human resources in the chat room, so that's the good news.
	And we have a spreadsheet here.
	What do we have?
	Oh, we have one of our producers becoming a knight today.
	That's nice.
	Yeah, we have one executive producer, two, three associate executive producers.
	Stephen Jaffe from Ranchos Palos Verde in California, 555.
	He ate happy holidays.
	You guys are the greatest.
	It's all fun and games until some elitist agenda gets hit in the mouth.
	Uh, Laughing my ass off.
	This donation should complete my knighthood.
	I will get back ring size.
	He'll be our executive producer for show 472.
	Thank you.
	Is he just completing it with the 5588, or is that some kind of number?
	I don't see a number, but the 88's got to be some code.
	Thomas Morgani in...
	Islip Terrace, New York.
	I don't have a note from him.
	There might be one in there somewhere.
	I'll look for the other break.
	225, he'll be an associate executive producer.
	Good old Sir Bean in Thousand Oaks, 220-222.
	TM, Alan, and Jorge, this fine Sunday morning service called The Best Podcast in the Universe, let me place the tithe offering of 2-2-2-2-2 in the collection plate, which is 10% of my unexpected Christmas bonus received on Armageddon Day.
	Since the numbers were just too delicious to believe, I immediately knew that the no-agenda karma gods were talking to me.
	So I offer this pittance in hopes to appease them.
	May I have a Don't Eat Me Hillary two to the head.
	It's almost too delicious to believe.
	My friend karma shot for a better 2013.
	Please set up a new monthly donation amount of $13.13 so I can properly update my $11.11 giving level.
	Very nice.
	Let me roll out this karma combo for you.
	Don't eat me!
	It's almost too delicious to believe, my friend.
	You've got karma.
	And finally, Eric DeShill sent us $222 and wished us a Merry Christmas and he'll be the associate executive producer for show 472.
	I want to remind people that we have another show coming up next Thursday during the holiday week and this gets pretty grim, as it were, during this period.
	And we are working.
	We decided to do these shows on Thursday...
	We'll be back again.
	I remind you to go to dvorak.org slash na, channeldvorak.com slash na, noagendashow.com and noagendanation.com and click on the donate button to keep us going through this miserable time of the year.
	Do you think that was Eric's donation, was that from noagendanation.com where he has all the fantastic stuff for sale?
	Is that part of where that came from?
	I would assume so.
	Well, make sure you do check out noagendanation.com.
	Noagendanation.com?
	Did I say something wrong?
	No, no, it's just...
	What?
	No, I'm just reiterating the noagendination.com.
	Oh, you mean noagendination.com, yes.
	Because apparently it does work for us eventually, so it's good.
	So please go buy something from there.
	And by the way, I don't know for sure, but I would assume he's had some Mayan coins left.
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	By the way, nothing happened.
	Well, first of all, there should be a discount on the Mayan coins, because nothing happened.
	Well, maybe it was because of the Mayan coins.
	Hold on one second.
	We highly appreciate everything our executive producer and associate executive producers have done for us today by contributing to the program.
	You can always do one very important thing for us, propagate the formula.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Mill. World. Order.
	Or even isn't.
	Shut up.
	Shut up, slave.
	Oh.
	There we go.
	There we go.
	I do have a clip called The Idiotic Report on the Mayans, which is the way the news media around here covered this story.
	Yeah.
	Oh, you want me to roll?
	No setup?
	That's it?
	Yeah, play it.
	Good morning, Burjila Rab.
	This is Muhammad.
	How may I help you?
	So we're calling people all around the world after midnight their time on December 21st to see how they're doing because there are some people who believe that the world is going to end today.
	So we're calling you in Dubai to find out if you're still alive and well and everything's okay in Dubai.
	Yes, sir.
	Praise be to God.
	Everything is okay, sir.
	We are still alive.
	How are things at the hotel?
	Yes, sir.
	Everything is going on so far so good.
	There you have it.
	So far, so good.
	Mayan Doomsday, December 21st, has arrived without incident in Dubai.
	Same for points east from Tokyo to Mother Teresa's convent in Calcutta.
	Life goes on.
	Oh, Jesus.
	What station was this?
	Was this CNN or something?
	It was ABC. Bull crap like that?
	Wow.
	ABC, your favorite.
	Well, I have my eyes wide open because there's, you know, especially towards the end of the year, all kinds of little things take place.
	We also had a very large event, which is still ongoing, certainly in the United States of Gitmo Nation, occupying the slaves with all kinds of yes, no, he said, she said, white, black, old, new, red, blue, just everything contrary, just trying to screw your head.
	But they slip stuff in at the very end.
	They have all these stats at the end of the year.
	And when it comes to the magic number, which of course is 3 or 33, whenever the elites come up with a list at the end of the year and they really shove it in your face, it's just too delicious to believe, my darling.
	We know now we didn't know last week.
	Thanks to the latest monthly State of the Climate Global Analysis Report from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, we now know where last month stands in the history books.
	It was the fifth hottest November since the start of record-keeping back in 1880.
	It sounds like something really interesting, doesn't it?
	Like, oh my god, it was the 5th hottest November since the started record could be in 1888.
	The 5th hottest!
	The 5th hottest, huh?
	It was the hottest November the Southern Hemisphere has ever seen.
	And it was the 333rd consecutive month of hotter than average global temperatures.
	Okay, well then we're all gonna die.
	Obviously.
	333rd.
	Please.
	Please.
	I mean, it's so obvious.
	Are they just like, hey, let's do one for Curry.
	Come on.
	He'll love this one.
	He'll never notice it.
	Was that that douchebag who's on MSNBC? Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	I got another one for you from that same douchebag.
	You know what happened when all those children were killed?
	Remember that?
	Yeah.
	Do you know what I'm talking about?
	Yeah, there was some sort of killing.
	Yeah, but it was in Afghanistan.
	Remember, like, one crazy soldier went down and just, like, killed everybody?
	Oh, but the guy who walked out, let's get this straight, he came in late for dinner.
	And somebody noticed him coming in, and he said, hey, how you doing?
	And then he walked out again.
	Mm-hmm.
	And then came back after killing a bunch of people.
	That guy?
	He killed like nine children and 20.
	He just went on a complete rampage all by himself.
	Yeah, that guy.
	So we've learned now, according to that douchebag on MSNBC, what the Army wants to do with him.
	Now, if you had this guy do this, what would you want to do with him?
	I'd court-martial him and throw him in the jail.
	What the U.S. Army wants to do is Staff Sergeant Robert Bales, the man accused of murdering 16 people, including nine children, in a shooting spree in Afghanistan this March.
	The Army wants to execute him, prosecutors revealed.
	They just want to kill him.
	Gee, wouldn't that be convenient?
	They just want to kill him.
	Uh, hmm.
	So, you know, remember all the reports?
	He was suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder.
	He had a concussion.
	What is this?
	Now they just want to kill him?
	That couldn't be some kind of cover-up, could it?
	And since when does the Army just go around killing dudes?
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	That's what we do.
	I mean, we're killing our own dudes.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	We do that, too.
	This is nuts.
	Usually we don't.
	No, of course not.
	Except for treason.
	And the thing people call treason, but we always have to remember we're not even in a war.
	There's no declared war, so there's no way of doing anything treasonous.
	Right, right.
	You can go AWOL, but they're not going to shoot you for that.
	But he didn't.
	It's not even really proven that he has done this.
	And now they want to kill him?
	That sounds fishy.
	Yeah, but this is all the stuff that gets slipped in at the end of the year, you know?
	You're just like, ah, don't worry about it.
	You've got to wrap up some stories, Bill.
	Wrap up some situations.
	Wrap it all up.
	Although I had to laugh at the Obamas.
	Now, the Obamas, of course...
	Are in Hawaii on vacation.
	Wait a minute.
	Are you telling me that he went on vacation during the fiscal cliff mess?
	Everybody went on vacation.
	They're coming back right after Christmas.
	So everyone's allowed to go, but then they have to come back.
	And you can tell that Michelle is pissed about it because the Obamas, they did the weekly address, the little YouTube thing they do, their little user-generated content.
	They did that together this week.
	And listen closely to what the First Lady says.
	Hi, everybody.
	That's the President, obviously.
	This weekend, as you gather with family and friends, Michelle and I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.
	We both love this time of year, and there's nothing quite like celebrating the holidays at the White House.
	It's an incredible experience, and one that we try to share with as many folks as possible.
	Folks, and mind you, they're not celebrating it there.
	They're in Hawaii.
	They're not celebrating it with you folks.
	This month, more than 90,000 people will come through the White House to see the holiday decorations.
	And our theme for this year's holiday season was Joy to All.
	Now, did you catch it?
	No, I didn't.
	Joy to all what?
	The theme for this year was joy to all.
	Oh, she said was?
	She says was, not is.
	She says was.
	No, you can't play it back.
	I gotta hear it.
	Because she's pissed.
	It was joy to all until the fiscal cliff crap, Obama.
	And our theme for this year's holiday season was joy to all.
	What is that all about?
	Is she coming from the future?
	It's not even Christmas yet, so she's talking in the past tense.
	Maybe she's from the future.
	I don't know, but it's like, wow.
	I think she's just really, really angry.
	Talk about over-interpreting the use of a single word.
	It is weird, though.
	Come on.
	Be honest.
	It's weird to say that.
	It's like, is she already in 2013?
	She doesn't care about the folks coming to visit?
	I don't know.
	Yeah.
	I think it has to do with Jake Tapper.
	I don't know if you heard him early.
	This was actually before the Thursday show.
	I saved this clip.
	Jake Tapper asked the president a question about where he's been on gun legislation and gun stuff.
	And the president's answer, I thought, was actually quite funny.
	I'll take one last question.
	Go ahead, Jake.
	It seems to a lot of observers that you made the political calculation in 2008 in your first term in 2012 not to talk about gun violence.
	You had your position on renewing the ban on semi-automatic rifles that then Senator Biden put into place, but you didn't do much about it.
	This is not the first issue, the first incident of horrific gun violence of your four years.
	Where have you been?
	Well, here's where I've been, Jake.
	I've been President of the United States, dealing with the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression.
	An auto industry on the verge of collapse.
	Two wars.
	I don't think I've been on vacation.
	Yeah, you've been on vacation more than any other president in history.
	I haven't been on vacation.
	Damn it, I need to go on vacation.
	Joy to the...
	Oh!
	And it should have ended the press conference.
	I'll see you guys later.
	Gotta go to Hawaii.
	Yeah, that's exactly right.
	I gotta go to Hawaii now.
	Yeah, enjoy that.
	Yeah, he's out.
	He's playing golf.
	I don't know.
	I guess it's just not that important about the fiscal cliff.
	Which, before he left, he did do a little statement.
	I've really been watching a lot of international CNN. He did a cool little statement where he flubbed it about the fiscal cliff.
	Over the last few weeks, I've been working with leaders of both parties on a proposal to get our deficit under control.
	Avoid tax cuts or avoid tax hikes on the middle class.
	Oops!
	Oops!
	To avoid tax cuts.
	Thanks.
	You get Clip of the Day for that.
	That's a good one.
	He's reading the paper.
	How can he mess that one up?
	Clip of the Day.
	So I have a fiscal cliff.
	Clip?
	Yeah.
	This is Stephen Dinan.
	He's a writer talking about the fiscal cliff, and he's making some observations on C-SPAN during one of those Washington things, you know, where they have the interviews with the guys and the people call in.
	It's actually kind of interesting what he said, which is just kind of confirming what I've been saying.
	The president is riding very high right now in terms of where people see him.
	Your caller was an indication of that.
	There are a lot of people who believe that he should win this fight with Boehner just because he's...
	Because he's convinced them that his policies are right.
	So he comes in with a lot of leverage here.
	The key question for Republicans is how much political damage they suffer.
	Who gets the blame if we go over the cliff?
	And more and more Republicans privately do believe that going over the cliff is better than the deal that they would get from Obama.
	There are also a number of Democrats who believe that going over the cliff is a good thing.
	Both of them are basically angling, both those sides are angling for next year and saying, well, what's the better starting point for all the conversation we're going to have next year?
	And those on both wings are beginning to think, well, the best starting point is all the spending cuts and all the tax increases.
	By the way, that also happens to do wonders for reducing our deficit next year.
	So what I understand.
	Go ahead, Ian.
	I'm sorry.
	I was going to say, it's essentially the way he sees it, this guy who's hanging out there.
	It's like behind closed doors.
	Everyone says, I think we should go over to a cliff.
	Who cares?
	I mean, these guys, this entire Congress has no...
	I mean, perhaps this will be solved in the last minute.
	But it just seems to me that they have no concern for the possible outcome, which could be a stock market collapse.
	It's definitely going to...
	Because 30 million Americans, which essentially includes probably 95% of our listeners in the United States, are going to have to pay the minimum tax.
	The minimum tax, which is a huge...
	Here's how you figure it out, by the way, for people.
	I've been looking into this even more.
	Here's your calculation.
	Take your gross income.
	Gross, not Ned.
	That's all right.
	It doesn't take me a long time to write it down.
	Go ahead.
	Keep going.
	Take 10% of that and add it to your tax bill that's always true.
	No.
	No.
	Yes.
	No.
	This can't be true, John.
	This cannot be true.
	I'm telling you.
	So when I get my, what is that, I use that computer program every year.
	TurboTax.
	So I'm going to get the new TurboTax and I'm going to wind up with this astronomical tax bill because, of course, we don't have any slave wages taken out or any FICA or whatever it is.
	We're independent dudes.
	And you're telling me that 10% of the gross, I can just add that to my tax bill?
	Yeah.
	It seems so weird that no one is talking about this.
	Well, a couple people are talking about it, but nobody's listening.
	Oh, okay.
	I mean, that professor at Georgetown, this tax expert who was on C-SPAN, is moaning about it just commonly.
	And if you look up the fiscal cliff, even the Wikipedia mentions that there's this type.
	But they kind of, you know, it's there.
	But people don't realize that it's for this year we're in.
	It's not 2013.
	John, okay.
	Listen, you've been bitching about this so much for the past month that I just want to understand, what does this have to do with the cuts that are sunsetting?
	Is this a provision that is in there that all of a sudden says, because alternative minimum tax, I believe, has been around.
	It didn't go away.
	Just explain, where does it come from?
	The history of the alternative minimum tax, it was done as some sort of a fix in 1986.
	Yes, but how come it pops up now?
	It doesn't seem like that's a part of the conversation.
	I think that's why you're not talking about it.
	I think it was purposely slipped in to gouge the public.
	Where can I find this information about this?
	You have to look up the Google...
	Fiscal cliff consequences or something like that, to find out what all the things are that constitute the fiscal cliff, there's quite a few things.
	Hold on a second.
	And this is in there.
	No, we have...
	Because you've been bitching about this so much, now I just want to get into it for once and for all.
	According to the Book of Knowledge, Wikipedia, the alternative minimum tax, AMT, is an income tax imposed by the United States federal government on individuals, corporations, estates, and trusts.
	That's everybody.
	AMT is imposed as a nearly flat rate on an adjusted amount of taxable income above a certain threshold, also known as exemption.
	This exemption is substantially higher than the exemption from regular income tax.
	Okay?
	It was enacted in 1969, imposed...
	I'm not reading here in the book of knowledge that all of a sudden it's going to be different.
	Are they changing the level?
	Yeah, the level is being changed.
	That's the problem.
	Okay.
	Exemption in 2011.
	Oh, no.
	I'm just trying to find out the big change.
	What is this?
	Exemption.
	I don't understand.
	That's the point.
	No, I understand it's the point that I don't understand.
	But was this really high and now it's going to a very low level?
	Is that what's happening?
	Yes.
	Okay, so it looks to me, if you're single, it looks to me that it will be somewhere around $48,000 is when this thing kicks in.
	Does that sound right to you?
	Yeah.
	My understanding is if you make $48,000, add $3,800 to your tax bill that you're already paying.
	Wow.
	If you make $100,000, add $10,000.
	I'm telling you, this is a disaster.
	It seems like the exemption, what it was, for some reason they had jacked it up to 300,000, which of course hits almost no one in the country, and that is now changing to 48.
	That's what it seems like.
	That's what the thing is.
	It will affect 30 million Americans.
	And we're pretty much in bankrupt the country.
	I mean, people will just, when they get their taxes, this is, here's what's going to either happen, if they don't fix this problem before the first of the year, which they don't seem intent on, because they don't, there's too, see this, I mean, these conservatives, this is, everybody, oh, I didn't know.
	We're not talking about it.
	I don't know.
	Blame Obama.
	Blame the Republicans.
	So what's going to happen is that the smart money in the stock market is going to know what's going on, and they're either going to bail out of the market and go all cash in January, which will collapse the economy, or people are going to be just like everybody else currently.
	I don't know anything about this minimum tax deal.
	April comes around, they do their taxes?
	It literally says here in the Wikipedia, the tax rates and exemption amounts.
	So 2011, if you're filing married, is $74,450.
	Single or head of household, $48,450.
	And 2012, it literally says TBD. Is that what's happening?
	That this is being deed as we are sitting by and watching?
	Yeah.
	Wow, okay.
	Well, that's bogative, man.
	That's really bogative.
	The amazing part is nobody's discussing this, so there's no sense of urgency that you need to stop this fiscal cliff from happening.
	And I think they're complicit.
	I think that conservative Republicans...
	Aren't saying anything about this, and you think they would?
	Nothing.
	And the Democrats, you think it'd be cool to go over the fiscal cliff because they can collect all this money and balance the budget a little better and blame the Republicans?
	They're not going to stop it.
	That's why I think we're going to go over.
	Obama must know better.
	I'm pretty sure that just from the way everybody's acting, it's just about who's going to get...
	Well, we've talked about this a million times.
	We've talked about it.
	The only other thing that I'm seeing that is being discussed, which I thought was pretty funny, you know, our boy Dennis Kucinich there, the gnome from Ohio, who is so unfortunate that he's just irrelevant.
	No one listens to the guy anymore, if they ever did.
	And I've always liked him because he's kind of a Democrat Ron Paul.
	He's saying...
	That the CPI is the big problem of the fiscal cliff and that part of the deal that's being made is that the Social Security benefits will be pegged to a new consumer price index.
	And that turns into the following.
	Will seniors be pushed off the fiscal cliff?
	Social Security did not cause a deficit.
	But the White House's plan to lower Social Security costs and living benefits could eventually reduce seniors' annual benefits by hundreds of dollars.
	The gimmick is called the Chain Consumer Price Index.
	Have you heard of this?
	The Chain Consumer Price Index?
	Yeah, I've heard this too, yeah.
	They're just going to reduce Social Security benefits for everybody by, like you said, probably $10 or $20 a month.
	Oh, well, here's Kucinich's play on it.
	The Chain CPI works this way.
	As cost of living goes up, seniors inevitably turn to cheaper alternatives.
	For example, if seniors eat steak, but they can't afford a higher price, they can switch to something cheaper.
	Like cat food.
	I love it when cat food comes out.
	Because I grew up with my...
	I don't know if your parents said this, but my parents would say, well, you don't want to wind up old and eating cat food.
	Have you ever heard this?
	Well, during the 70s, it was just a common thing because there was news item after news item of seniors, mostly, eating dog food.
	It was never cat food, though.
	Oh, really?
	Oh, interesting.
	Cat food stinks.
	Dog food is supposed to be, you know, it's got meat in it.
	Well, this is very interesting.
	I had no idea.
	That's very, very interesting.
	And the cost of living calculation would change to the cheaper item, cat food.
	So the less you pay for food, the less benefits you get.
	The Chained CPI benefit cut will chain aging seniors to a poverty of choices, a lower standard of living, with cheaper products.
	The Chained CPI formula doesn't take into account seniors' rising healthcare costs.
	If it did, benefits would go up.
	There is no justification to security benefits.
	No to throwing seniors off the fiscal cliff.
	No to a cat food Christmas.
	I love the cat food Christmas, Dennis.
	And no one's listening.
	I mean, literally, you can hear the people.
	Do you like friskies?
	You can hear the other people in Congress.
	Just like, yeah, it's Cassini's talking.
	Who gives a crap?
	That guy, he's gone.
	We discredited him out.
	No one cares.
	Oh, man.
	That's exactly what they did.
	What are you going to do to get rid of some of these guys?
	Oh, man.
	In fact, talking about that, getting rid of these guys, I have a couple of clips that are interesting.
	If we want to play Stephen Moore, Wall Street Journal, he's talking about the fiscal cliff, but then he brought up something else which I thought was interesting because it relates to the second clip that I have, and this is on term limits.
	We're frustrated with our politicians.
	A lot of people say at Pakistan, both their houses, they're acting like children.
	They should have coal in their stockings.
	There was Santa Claus on Capitol Hill yesterday putting coal in all their stockings.
	But, you know, then you look at the election.
	Guess what?
	We re-elected 97% of these people.
	So when we ask who's to blame, we can't say, oh, these politicians are out of control when we send 97%.
	What did we tell them on November 5th?
	We told them, whatever you're doing, keep doing it, because we reelected all these folks.
	So I think we, yes, it's fine to be angry at these politicians.
	I'm angry at them.
	But maybe we should look at ourselves, too, as voters and say, why do we keep sending these people back to Congress year after I've always been, by the way, a very strong proponent of term limits.
	I think six years in the House...
	I can answer this, by the way.
	This is happening here, too.
	Do you know that now that Mario Monti, the Prime Minister of Italy, after he passed the budget, he immediately went, okay, well, thanks.
	Remember the guy came in?
	He's a banking shill.
	We tracked the whole process.
	It's like, oh, Italy's in trouble.
	They put in the banking shill.
	He comes up with this huge austerity budget.
	Screw the slaves.
	Thank you, citizen.
	His budget passes.
	He's like, oh, well, I'm going to retire.
	No one loves me.
	And now everyone's talking about, oh, Berlusconi's going to be back in.
	And of course he is, because he owns the television stations and the newspapers that say that he's going to be back in.
	And the citizens are so dumb.
	The citizenry.
	They're like, oh yeah, well, he's going to be back in.
	And I swear to God, they will mind control, walk to the voting booth if they vote at all, and they will vote him back in.
	It's unbelievable.
	Yeah, it's just hilarious.
	First they got him in.
	He owns the place.
	He's Mussolini.
	Remove him so this banker can come in and make some changes and take a full retirement.
	So they move him back up, put Burlesconi back in with a different fiscal situation, and he can blame it on somebody else.
	Yes, and people are like, oh.
	But it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
	Because like, well, we might as well vote for him then.
	You know, he's going to be it anyway.
	And people just miss the whole point of how they're being mind-controlled into doing this stuff.
	And yes, you voted all these...
	Please, let me just give an example.
	I know you want to go to another clip, right?
	Because I want to play another idiot that we voted back in.
	Can I do that now?
	Or do you want to...
	Yeah, no, play now.
	I can wait.
	This is Sheila Jackson Lee of Texas.
	Oh, this horrible person.
	Now, she, of course, is going to talk some bull crap about, you know, how we don't...
	Just listen how she goes.
	She takes dead children to change it to some agenda she has.
	Speaker, when I mention the words Hurricane Sandy and the tragedy in Newton, Connecticut, many would wonder, what do they...
	It's Newtown, by the way, okay?
	Not Newton.
	...have in common...
	Nothing!
	Enormous gun tragedy of a loss of 26 lives and Americans suffering from a devastating storm.
	What do they have in common, John?
	Let's see.
	Newton, Connecticut, and Hurricane Sandy.
	What do they have in common?
	Please, help me, because Sheila Jackson Lee knows.
	Yeah, they do have some.
	You're missing it.
	Sandy.
	Sandy.
	Hurricane Sandy and Sandy Hook.
	That is not correct.
	Well, that's in common.
	Yes.
	The word's sandy.
	But that is not where she's going.
	Certainly our hearts go out for those babies who are lost.
	Babies!
	But it really speaks to Americans in need.
	Oh, it's Americans in need.
	And I guess that's why I'm so troubled to be on the floor today.
	No, no, it's troubling to see you on the floor.
	Because the framework that we have says to America that when you're in need, we will not, as this Congress and as this government, be prepared to help you.
	See, this is what I do.
	Did she just go from dead babies to food stamps?
	Well, why don't you let it play without stopping it?
	I want to hear what she says.
	Yes, that's what she did.
	I think what is disappointing, and I know for the Speaker, It is probably the same case as I'm speaking.
	Because just about three days ago, we thought there was a deal between the White House and the framework that was offered.
	She's talking about the fiscal cliff, John.
	How does she go from point A to point C? Because she's insane, obviously.
	Have you seen what she wears?
	The woman is insane!
	Now, I think she's already dropping out for...
	Isn't she out next year?
	Please say she's out.
	I don't think so.
	I can't remember.
	She might be.
	I think so.
	But it just goes to show we have insane people.
	Insane people in there.
	And you know who they're talking about now?
	Because, of course, we have the new douchebag, ladies and gentlemen.
	Oh, yeah.
	It didn't last long.
	Today, though, I'm looking ahead to my second term, and I'm very proud to announce my choice for America's next Secretary of State, John Kerry.
	Douchebag!
	In a sense, John's entire life has prepared him for this role.
	As the son of a Foreign Service officer.
	He's an elite.
	He has a deep respect for the men and women of the State Department.
	He married into one of the richest families in the universe with his big head.
	The role they play in advancing our interests and values, the risks that they undertake, and the sacrifices that they make along with their families.
	And here's my favorite.
	Having served with valor in Vietnam.
	Serving with valor in Vietnam.
	Wasn't it like this swift boat thing?
	What was that all about?
	What is the serving with valor in Vietnam?
	Sounds good, by the way.
	I like it.
	He got a medal, I believe.
	He got a Purple Heart, didn't he?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	He got shot.
	Well, that sucks.
	But wasn't there a whole controversy over his record?
	It was rigged.
	Who knows?
	I mean, he may have done a bit.
	Who cares?
	I mean, the guy's still a pompous windbag.
	So they bring him in.
	By the way, if you want to see some cool John Kerry video, go look at the Clarence Thomas-Anita Hill hearings, which he presided over.
	It's the funniest thing ever.
	This big head.
	Talking about Long Dong Silver.
	It's just funny.
	The whole thing was what a circus that was.
	So he is going to become Secretary of State, and that opens up a Senate spot.
	Now, who do you think we should put into his Senate spot?
	This is a fantastic...
	And this, of course, is what it's all about, because we want to see if we can change a little bit of the makeup of the Senate.
	If you were to guess and you had a list of anyone in the universe, who would you want to bring in there?
	Well, if I'm part of the corrupt Massachusetts machine, it would have to be a Kennedy.
	How about a Celebrity?
	Who?
	A Celebrity.
	Well, Ben Affleck would be good.
	To get into speculation about my political future.
	I like to be involved right now.
	I'm really happy being involved from the outside government, advocating for the Congolese, taking this movie that I made, Argo, and it's really become a springboard for dialogue about our relationship with Iran.
	Well, Bob, he sure does sound like a politician.
	He won't give you a straight answer.
	I tell you, he's mastered one part of the craft, hasn't he?
	You know, he was here to talk about, he has this organization called Eastern Congo Initiative, where he's trying to do something.
	He appeared yesterday before the House Armed Services Committee to talk about some way to make things better over there.
	He's a very committed, a very serious person.
	You know, he went to Harvard and majored in Middle Eastern Studies.
	Oh, I didn't know that.
	He's perfect.
	He looks handsome.
	He's a celebrity.
	He's in Massachusetts.
	He went to Harvard.
	I didn't know he went to Harvard.
	This guy's perfect.
	I say bring him in.
	He's the new Clooney.
	He's got a pretty wife.
	So yeah, he'd be a good senator for douchebags of Massachusetts.
	I think they should be up in arms.
	I don't know.
	They should just have a special election.
	They shouldn't be putting anybody in there temporarily.
	That's what they're doing with the point where I was taking.
	Here's the guy who's quitting, who's been re-elected, Jesse Jackson Jr.
	He's out of Illinois, of course, the Chicago area.
	So he apparently has essentially broken down.
	Yeah.
	Has bipolar or something, even worse, you don't know.
	But anyway, so he put in his resignation.
	But when you hear the end of this report, you go right back to this, what is wrong with the public?
	And what should be changed?
	Just play this and you'll see.
	Several months as my health has deteriorated, my ability to serve the constituents of my district has continued to diminish.
	The drama around Jackson began this summer when the congressman disappeared for weeks.
	The public, even members of his staff, didn't know where he was.
	Finally, in late July, the Mayo Clinic revealed Jackson was being treated there for what was later diagnosed as bipolar disorder and depression.
	His famous father, uncharacteristically quiet about the matter.
	The fact is, the Congressman is under medical supervision and is right now regaining strength.
	Jackson was released in September, then readmitted last month.
	His return to the clinic came amid reports that the congressman faced a federal investigation into potential misuse of campaign funds, including allegations that Jackson used thousands of dollars to redecorate his Washington, D.C. townhome, and that he used $40,000 to buy a Rolex watch for a female friend.
	Even so, Jackson was easily re-elected to the House just a few weeks ago, even though he was in the Mayo Clinic, even though he never campaigned for the job.
	In his resignation letter, Jackson added that, against the recommendations of my doctors, he'd hoped to return to Washington, but I now know it will not be possible.
	Jackson said he is working with federal investigators and, quote, accepts responsibilities for his mistakes, but it's unclear whether his resignation was part of a reported plea deal with prosecutors.
	A special election will now be held to fill his seat.
	Now, what is a special election?
	It's just an election, right?
	Or do they have special...
	Yeah, it means it's special because there's nothing else going on except that one thing.
	Right.
	Now, here's the kicker I thought was funny, was he didn't run I mean, he didn't do any campaigning.
	He ran.
	He didn't do any campaigning.
	He was under investigation for misuse of funds, which he might as well use in his own way, because he doesn't need the money as a campaign.
	And then he got re-elected, even though he's hospitalized by the public.
	Just without looking it up, what kind of a...
	Number did he come up with for his re-election?
	What percentage of his knowledgeable locals would have voted for him, you think?
	98%.
	No, that's funny, but it's not.
	71%.
	That's still unbelievable, isn't it?
	So 71% voted him in against two other candidates.
	They just gave him...
	It was in 1850 that they dropped the requirements of the Constitution that only people who could vote were property owners.
	And it was like, I think they've got to change the electorate.
	Most of the people that vote, they don't know what they're doing.
	They just vote, like you said, in Italy, because it was something they heard on the television.
	And you end up voting a guy who's in the hospital with bipolar under investigation, doesn't bother to campaign, and you give him 71% of the vote.
	Does anyone think this is a problem?
	I know exactly how that went, because it's just like...
	Oh, that's the Jussie Jackson.
	He's a good guy.
	They don't even know that he's in the hospital.
	They don't even know he has bipolar disease.
	And by the way, he was spotted hanging out with some Hollywood producer douchebag in that guy's house for months.
	You know, it's not like he was in an Illinois hospital.
	Please.
	The whole thing is rigged.
	Everything's rigged.
	A game we're not in on.
	Surprise.
	Anyway, so that's my complaint of the day.
	Well, I have many more.
	This will probably kind of flow along with it.
	We have this We the People thing that the White House started on whitehouse.gov a while ago.
	I think it was actually two years ago by now.
	You've seen this where you can petition the government and the president promised that anything that gets 25,000 votes, they'll take into consideration.
	Yeah, this is including the Pierce Morgan thing.
	Yeah.
	So the first time that we knew this was all bogative was when, you know, there was like 150,000 people saying, hey, why don't you decriminalize marijuana?
	And the president laughed it off saying, well, it says a lot about people who are voting online, doesn't it?
	Oh, a bunch of stoners.
	That's so stupid.
	And now we have...
	We have one to deport British citizen Pierce Morgan.
	Actually, we have more than one.
	There's like three of them now.
	It's become an SEO thing.
	It's like people, hey man, everyone's searching for this.
	Let's jump on it.
	We'll use that for SEO. So there's an actual We the Citizens petition to deport British citizen Pierce Morgan.
	We've had them for drones and all of them way over 25,000 votes.
	But of course, none of that gets any attention from the White House.
	But when it's about guns...
	Hi, everybody.
	We started We the People so that you could directly petition your government on the matters you care about the most.
	So that you could make your voice heard.
	And in the days since the heartbreaking tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut, hundreds of thousands of you from all 50 states have signed petitions asking us to take serious steps to address the epidemic of gun violence in this country.
	So I just wanted to take a minute today to respond and let you know we hear you.
	You see how it works, though?
	It's like he only will respond to something that fits his agenda or whatever he feels is important and not all the other things.
	And now people think that it works.
	This is bull crap.
	Yeah, but then people think that it's working, petitioning your government.
	If you want to petition your government, you've got to get on K Street and have a $100 million budget.
	That's how you petition your government.
	Yeah, and here's some of the petitions that they're responding to.
	Listen to these.
	Talk about an agenda.
	A balanced approach to reforming the Postal Service.
	Oh, man.
	Which, by the way, again, they missed another $5.5 billion bogative payment, and now everyone's saying, oh, they're bankrupt, get rid of them.
	A message from the President Obama about your petition on reducing gun violence.
	They want the beer recipe.
	The army no longer using monkeys as part of training at Aberdeen Proving Ground.
	Wait, they've responded to that?
	What's the response to it?
	Okay, we won't use monkeys.
	We'll use little children.
	Here it is, by Colonel Thomas Collins.
	Thank you for your participation in the We the People platform on WhiteHouse.gov.
	On September 20, 2011, the Army stated it would no longer use monkeys.
	That's it?
	It worked!
	It worked!
	That's great.
	I love that.
	Wouldn't it just be funny?
	Hello everybody!
	We hear you about Pierce Morgan.
	So we are deporting that lying bitch back to the UK. Now that, by the way, that would be awesome.
	I mean, it's not going to happen unless it falls right into it.
	It's got to be a talking point.
	Nothing.
	There's a bunch of these things.
	They're all bull crap.
	Yeah.
	We do.
	Here's one.
	Apparently there's a big outcry for this.
	Building a government serves ordinary Americans, not special interests.
	Oh, really?
	Let's take a look at the full response to that by Tanya Robinson.
	Thank you for taking the time to participate.
	We launched this online tool, blah, blah, blah.
	First, you should note the President believes the Supreme Court ruling in Citizens United is contrary to the public interest.
	Oh, this is just a Citizens United slam.
	Even though Obama really cleaned up on a bunch of secretive funds, apparently, that were put together by someone or other.
	So I think this is just talking out of his ass.
	He probably loves this.
	I did catch the President with his real...
	With the real message of what he's going...
	Have you been catching all of this stuff now?
	We've got these celebrities.
	Did you see this?
	The demand-to-plan crap?
	You didn't see this, did you?
	Oh, my God.
	Okay.
	So the demandaplan, demandaplan.org, it's part of a huge lobbying initiative, Mayors Against Guns.
	And this really is a very, very big K Street Washington lobby to get rid of guns.
	And so they put together a video of celebrities.
	And I can't even, I mean, everyone's in it.
	You'll recognize most of the voices.
	I'll just play this.
	And it is massive, massive neuro-linguistic programming.
	Very interesting from a Curry DeVore consulting perspective, just to listen to what they're saying, the words they're using.
	It's one of these where everyone read the same script and they cut it up.
	You familiar with that one?
	Oh yeah, that's a good one.
	I haven't heard this one, but I'm assuming they also do the...
	Breaks that are mistimed, so you're hearing a flow, you hear this, it comes in in a herky-jerk way.
	Oh my God, John, it is, and then they have Chris Rock, you know, who is, he interjects, they keep throwing him in from time to time.
	It's really, really jarring, very effective, plays to your patriotism, you know, it's crazy ways, and I just want to, let's just listen to it.
	Columbine.
	Virginia Tech.
	Tucson.
	Aurora.
	Fort Hood.
	Oak Creek.
	Now, I have to stop here.
	Fort Hood was not a school.
	Yet they throw that in.
	In fact, we don't even know...
	We play that again.
	We don't even know what Fort Hood was because we're never going to find...
	They're never going to tell us.
	Columbine.
	Virginia Tech.
	Tucson.
	Aurora.
	Fort Hood.
	Oak Creek.
	Newtown.
	Newtown.
	Well, Tucson refers to Gabby Gifford, so that's not a school either.
	Aurora refers to the movie theater.
	The theater.
	So what they just said, they're just throwing out a bunch of non-sequitur shootings.
	But I think we should put Kandahar, Basra.
	Baghdad.
	We can put all of that in there.
	Yemen.
	Yeah, Yemen.
	We should do this for drone attacks.
	That'd be funny.
	If only we could get some celebrities to do it with us.
	Columbine.
	Virginia Tech.
	Tucson.
	Aurora.
	Fort Hood.
	Oak Creek.
	Newtown.
	How many more?
	How many more?
	How many more colleges?
	How many more classrooms?
	How many more movie theaters?
	How many more houses of faith?
	How many more shopping malls?
	How many more street quarters?
	How many more?
	How many more?
	This is a campaign of fear, by the way.
	Enough.
	Enough.
	Demand a plan.
	Right now.
	As a mom.
	As a dad.
	As a friend.
	As a husband.
	As a wife.
	as an American. As an American. As an American. As an American. As a human being.
	for the children of Sandy Hook.
	Demand a plan.
	No more lists of names.
	It's not too soon.
	It's too late.
	Now is the time.
	Before we all know someone who loves someone on that list.
	No more lists.
	No more...
	Who they might have been.
	No more...
	If we had just done something yesterday.
	It's time.
	We can do better than this.
	We can do better than this.
	It's time.
	It's time.
	It's time for our leaders to act.
	Demand a plan.
	Right now.
	You!
	Demand it!
	Enough.
	Enough.
	What do you think?
	Well, I don't know how effective it was.
	It could have been better.
	Obviously, when you see the celebrities, it works better.
	I mean, that's obvious that you're recognizing these people.
	Yeah, primarily from very violent television series or movies that they play in, but that's just an aside.
	I'm sure that they're all demanding, as part of the plan, no more violence on television or in the movie theaters.
	No, there's not part of it.
	I don't see that anywhere.
	I think that should be part of the plan.
	I'm demanding that as part of my plan.
	Yeah, take all these shows off the air.
	Yeah, demand the plan.
	And stop these movies.
	What's the plan?
	Have you noticed that they've moved it away from the movies?
	For years, Hollywood has been angry and seen the video game industry as their main competitor.
	Which is, I mean, everyone knows this.
	The video game industry is taking hundreds of millions, if not billions of dollars, billions, away from the Hollywood movie industry.
	And they really, really hate it.
	So that's why you get stuff like this.
	The nation's lawmakers turn their sights on violent video games as one way of reducing gun violence.
	West Virginia Senator Jay Rockefeller introduced legislation authorizing the National Academy of Sciences to investigate the impact of violent video games on children.
	There have been reports the Connecticut school shooter played violent video games.
	Of course.
	Of course.
	It's like everyone's coming out.
	Anyone who has an agenda to go and screw some other guys, like, let's use this.
	So Hollywood demand a plan, please.
	You go to demandaplan.org, I'm sure it doesn't say stop violence on television and movies.
	I don't see it anywhere.
	So these people are just a bunch of hypocrites.
	Yeah, you can't just do one, not the other.
	You can't...
	Go after violent video games without going after violent movies, violent TVs.
	Put the story back in a movie.
	I just find it very interesting how, especially to watch this from a little bit of a distance, is fascinating.
	Fascinating to see it.
	Take action.
	Take action.
	Let's take some action.
	And then, meanwhile, the head of the NRA came out and gave a speech.
	Yeah, I didn't see that, obviously, because it was not telecast here.
	You saw it?
	Yeah, I saw it and it was actually...
	I actually listened to the audio, the whole thing.
	It was actually a very reasonable, well-reasoned speech.
	It was long.
	They played it on Fox Live and they played it on CNN at the same time.
	It was weird.
	But anyway, so what they did was they just took a...
	The other side just took...
	He took snippets from the speech and made the guy look like a maniac.
	He wants to arm children!
	He wants guns in schools!
	Baby Glocks!
	Which is not what he wanted.
	Essentially, just called for...
	He said, what's wrong with having a cop at the school or whatever?
	And then it turns out that Cleveland School District for the last decade has been loaded to the hilt with armed guards.
	Right.
	Oh, it was a crappy area.
	But just, I mean, this is, they're trying to follow suit.
	I know, I mean, this is not going to happen, but, and I'm not worried about it, but they would love to do what they did in Australia, which is literally round up guns.
	Round them up.
	You got a gun?
	You're going to have to turn yourself into the police.
	Take the gun away from you.
	I got to disagree.
	There's no gun.
	I got to disagree.
	Except for the people that aren't going to turn them in that are criminals.
	I disagree.
	Leave everybody as a sitting duck.
	I disagree.
	This is not what the president is saying.
	This is not what he's saying.
	And I have the proof right here.
	And we're starting to see optimistic signs.
	And we've seen, actually, some upside statistics from a whole range of areas, including housing.
	Now is not the time for more self-inflicted wounds, certainly not those coming from Washington.
	And there's so much more work to be done in this country on jobs and on incomes, education and energy.
	We're a week away from one of the worst tragedies in memory, so we've got work to do on gun safety.
	Ha ha!
	Gun safety, John.
	That's what we're going to do.
	He's not stupid, this president.
	Gun safety.
	Gun safety, yeah.
	Yeah, that means taking your gun away.
	I'm sure it doesn't mean having classes in gun safety at the high school.
	Well, I'm just saying.
	Here's how you load one of these magazines.
	That's what we should be doing.
	That'd be great.
	Never point a gun at one of your buddies.
	Or a senior citizen.
	So here's an interesting situation.
	I believe that the Sandy Hook thing has a number, and just by the way, the last time I'm talking about this, but I ended up with some of these interesting clips.
	I believe that there was an accounting problem With the casualties announced at Sandy Hook.
	And they had to change the accounting by creating situations that some were, I think...
	There was this one guy who showed up early on.
	I think on the 17th he showed up.
	This is the guy who had the six kids in his front yard.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	And they were in a semicircle and he brought them in.
	They played with little toy animals, yeah.
	So Glenn Rosen, of course, if you read the...
	So I wanted to find this guy.
	So you start reading the forums, especially some of this stuff that's on YouTube.
	They have all these nutball...
	I mean, people that, if they'd be better off listening to our show than whatever they're listening, they go...
	No, it's a lie.
	Gene Rosen is an actor with the Screen Actors Guild, and there is a guy named Gene Rosen who's in Screen Actors Guild, and he's out of California.
	That's true.
	But this guy, which his real name is Eugene O. Rosen, or Eugene E. Rosen.
	I actually found his address.
	And where his house is and looked at it on Google Earth and I could see the driveway he's talking about and everything else.
	And then I did a little more research because he was actually hard to find.
	He has a wife named Marilyn and she's the one with the phone number which makes it easier once you figure out where she is.
	And they lived in Connecticut for the last 20 years.
	I mean this is not the guy from the Screen Actors Guild.
	And he's also 69.
	The Screen Actors Guild guy is 62.
	Hold on.
	Did you go down some rabbit hole, John?
	It sounded like you weren't really...
	Yeah, I was not...
	You went off the deep end on this one.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Well, the reason is because I did hear what I... I believe was an actor, some sort, which was doing some accounting problems because of the six people that were in Mrs.
	Soto's class, which was supposed to have been wiped out according to this other report, except for one person because they have one too many people on the death list.
	And you can hear it all.
	And this is what triggered me to dig up the Gene Rosen guy.
	But a pastor describes something or other.
	It's funny because we both latched on to this.
	Okay, you want me to play the clip?
	Yeah.
	We're hearing how one little girl survived the massacre, and my colleague Lara is back now with that story.
	It's an incredible story.
	Dan, it is an unbelievable story.
	I just want to know we both had the exact same clip.
	16 kids in this classroom.
	One survived.
	I spoke last night with the pastor who has been counseling this little girl's mother.
	One survived.
	Yeah, yeah.
	No, I know.
	I know.
	I did some research on this guy, too.
	Funny story of how a first grader lived by playing dead.
	You have one parishioner who was right there, a little girl, a first grader.
	She was the first student who ran out of the Sandy Hook School, six and a half years old.
	She ran out of the school building covered in blood from head to toe.
	And the first word she said to her mom when she got outside was, Mommy, I'm okay, but all my friends are dead.
	Hold on a second.
	Before we go any further, so I saw this guy, I'm like, oh my God, they made a huge mistake putting this guy on camera.
	Could you please explain the accounting problem one more time before we move forward?
	This is critical because I didn't catch this part.
	I'm sorry, say again?
	I'd like you to explain the accounting problem before we move forward because that's the part that...
	Oh yeah, the accounting problem...
	Yeah, there's supposed to be 20 dead children, and if there were 15 dead children in Mrs.
	Soto's class, if you count 16 with this little girl, there was some issue with the number of people that were killed, and it was an accounting problem, and so they were won over.
	So there would have been 21 dead kids.
	So this story comes out explaining the number.
	The problem is the other guy, this Rosen character, with the six small children from also Soto's class that were in his front yard...
	Really screws up the accounting.
	So they have taken the Rosen guy and pushed him aside, and we don't hear that anymore at all about Rosen.
	But when they took him and pushed him aside, the six things didn't add up, so there was one missing, living person missing.
	So this story shows up out of the blue that we didn't hear about at all, about the bloody girl covered.
	Now let's think about this for a second.
	By the way, it's ABC News.
	I'd like to point that out.
	Yes.
	And it's a girl covered from head to toe.
	In blood.
	In blood.
	And this is her pastor.
	Her pastor who has been working with her.
	Yeah, and the mom told him the story.
	No, the story is actually that this pastor is the one who is working with her to work with this child to work through her trauma.
	If you listen to the lead-in of the story, they're saying that this pastor has been chosen to work with her.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	So let me just roll this back a few seconds here.
	In blood from head to toe, ran outside, said, Mommy, everyone else is dead.
	No one has had this at all.
	Apparently the parents were already there when this took place.
	This thing is so full of holes.
	God damn it.
	You have one parishioner who was right there, a little girl, a first grader.
	She was the first student who ran out of the Sandy Hook School, six and a half years old.
	She ran out of the school building covered in blood from head to toe.
	And the first word she said to her mom when she got outside was, Mommy, I'm okay, but all of my friends are dead.
	Somehow, in that moment, by God's grace, was able to...
	Act as if she was already deceased.
	Was she the only child in that class that survived?
	Yes.
	Of those who were left in the classroom, of first graders, she was the lone survivor.
	What did she tell her mom?
	What did she see in there?
	Well, she saw someone who she felt was angry and somebody who she felt was very mad.
	How at six and a half years old can you be that smart, that brave?
	I think it's impossible outside of divine intervention.
	And by the way, can this guy sound any gayer, please?
	I mean, just make him sound gayer.
	She has wisdom beyond two years.
	How are the mom and dad doing?
	I think as well as you can expect them to do.
	And they must be relieved to have their child, but on the other hand, so many feelings.
	Yes, the mom told me, and I thought this was very insightful, that she was suffering from what she called survivor's guilt, because so many of her friends no longer have their children, but she has hers.
	A long road ahead.
	Just an incredible story of survival and all by a six-year-old girl.
	Did you hear in the package where the pastor also said she survived by playing that she was deceased?
	Who talks like that?
	Nobody.
	In this clip he says playing dead.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	You saw a second clip?
	I'm pretty sure it was exactly the same clip.
	Hold on a second.
	Let's check.
	And my colleague Lara is back now.
	It's the same clip.
	Listen, you must have missed it.
	It is an unbelievable story of 16...
	He says it right in the beginning.
	He says she did it by playing deceased.
	I spoke last night with the pastor who has been counseling this little girl.
	He's counseling her.
	Counseling the little girl.
	Mother, it is a howering story of how a first grader lived by playing dead.
	You have one parishioner who was right there, a little girl, a first grader.
	She was the first student who ran out of the Sandy Hook School, six and a half years old.
	She ran out of the school building covered in blood from head to toe.
	And the first words she said to her mom when she got outside was, Mommy, I'm okay, but all of my friends are dead.
	Somehow, in that moment, by God's grace, was able to Act as if she was already deceased.
	Act as if she was already deceased.
	Who talks like that?
	Talks like that.
	No one talks like that.
	Okay, so this pastor is from the community church, which is a member of the Alliance.
	Now, this is a very interesting group, John, the Christian and Missionary Alliance.
	Have you ever heard of this outfit?
	No.
	You know, the name kind of rings a bell, but I can't tell you anything about them, but I can imagine.
	So they have their headquarters in Colorado, interestingly enough.
	They are also in Australia and Lebanon, and they're this kind of weird offshoot.
	And if you look at the Wikipedia page, they are not without controversy.
	Alumni have reported that there was abuse of children in the CNMA, so I'm just going by what I hear on Wikipedia.
	What I read on Wikipedia.
	And, you know, as I was reading through this, somehow in my, you know, in all the craziness, right?
	And this is, look, this is just tying stuff into each other.
	I'm thinking there may just be some kind of pedo bear aspect to this whole thing.
	Particularly when you look at, this is part of the tri-state area, the Sandusky scandal played out in Second Mile.
	Sandusky, by the way.
	If you want to pull in the Sandy thing, just as a lark.
	Yeah, you just want to pull that in as a lark.
	And all of a sudden this weird priest from this kind of offbeat church who have...
	Actually, I brought up their...
	Let me just read you from this...
	They have a manual, this church.
	The Manual of the Christian and Missionary Alliance.
	You ever hear of a church that has a manual?
	Well, they got one.
	And here they have...
	This is the latest revision from the Board of Directors from the CMA, February 2012.
	In Matthew 15, 9, Jesus teaches that immoral behavior starts first in the heart and mind.
	Self-indulgent thoughts of sexual fulfillment outside of God's creative intent constitute inward sins of lust.
	No sexual act can be proper if it is driven by desires that are contrary to the best interests of another human being or if it treats persons as impersonal objects intended only for personal gratification.
	Passion aroused by producing or viewing images of a sexual nature is morally unacceptable.
	We reject the idea that pedophilia, voyeurism, prostitution or pornography is ever morally justified.
	We reject all attempts at constructing one's own sexual identity by medically altering the human body cross-dressing or similarly practicing behavior characteristics of the opposite sex as morally objectionable and sinful.
	So, you take with that the so-called evidence that Adam Lanza's computer was bashed beyond repair, nothing could be pulled off of the hard drive, and then you just, you know, I'm just, I'm thinking, John, I can't put my finger on it yet.
	I haven't been able to connect things, but it feels like that just maybe...
	Maybe it was the teacher or someone knew something.
	And this is very similar to what happened in, I think, Dunblane in Scotland where a guy comes in, kills all the kids.
	It may be because someone knew something.
	And I know in our previous shows you talked about it maybe being the principal.
	Somebody knew something and something had to happen to cover up maybe one witness, multiple witnesses.
	But it would not surprise me if there is a pretty easy pedophilia angle to all of this.
	Well, yeah, except you see that more often than I do, generally speaking.
	Yes.
	Well, I don't know.
	This church does have some interesting prominent former members.
	Billy Graham, for one.
	Apparently he was at one of these churches from 33 to 37.
	And I don't know.
	All I know is that this guy seemed pretty strange to me.
	But I still think it's a bookkeeping problem because this other guy's story makes no sense.
	And unfortunately, there's a little ad.
	I forgot to cut this ad out at the beginning of this.
	Contradictory Sandy Hook, Mrs.
	Soto class.
	I'm sorry, it's on there.
	This is the guy, Rosen.
	This is the story he told to Fox.
	It's also misreported by Fox.
	If you listen to this guy enough, he tells the story five different ways.
	Fox misreports it.
	CBS had him on the morning show.
	And then if we want to do something that's very entertaining at the end of the show, I do have the raw audio.
	In other words, the whole interview, you know, as a lot of people know, some people don't, is that when you're interviewed by one of these big networks, they'll talk to you for 10 minutes.
	I think I have eight minutes of this guy chatting with Aaron Burnett.
	And he is just going all over the place with one thing after another.
	He's making stuff up.
	He breaks into tears.
	I think the guy's a little nutty.
	And Erin is just, she's clueless and she's just asking him dumb questions.
	And it's actually quite entertaining.
	It would be a good end of show clip.
	But this is him talking to Fox News after this little ad at the beginning, which I again apologize for, runs.
	This new Nokia Lumia 920 from AT&T is live.
	Really?
	You took money from AT&T and tried to slip it into this show?
	Is that what you did, John?
	Really?
	I wish!
	I could have cut this off, you know.
	Anyway, once we get to your guys' clip, I got an even better one, I think.
	Well, out of the sadness in Newtown, Connecticut, we are learning today an incredible story.
	This man lives near Sandy Hook Elementary School, and he's speaking out about his experience of coming home and finding six small children sitting in a semicircle on his lawn.
	He had heard the gunfire on his way back from breakfast at a local diner, and he thought it was a hunter.
	And then he saw these children just sitting on his front lawn.
	He started to talk to them, gave them juice and toys, and they recounted what had happened.
	Listen to this.
	And then over the next 30 minutes, they just described what happened, little by little.
	And these two boys kept saying...
	We can't go back to school.
	We can't go back to school.
	Our teacher is dead.
	This is Soto.
	We don't have a teacher.
	And I couldn't believe it.
	I couldn't take that in.
	I had no idea what had happened.
	So, so, so sad.
	And listening to his story, and he said at first he saw them on the lawn, he thought that they were putting on a play or something.
	He was trying to understand what they could possibly be doing on his front lawn.
	And we all know how children feel about their teacher.
	It's like the most important person in their life outside their family.
	So your heart just breaks listening to that story.
	And we know that school has begun again for other children in Sandy Hook, but not the children who go to that elementary school.
	So we continue to bring you their stories throughout the week.
	You know, so the chat room, by the way, is saying that the girl was not from Soto's classroom, that she was from a different classroom.
	Like, we know anything.
	We don't know anything.
	That can't be.
	Here's the problem with that.
	That's, again, an accounting problem.
	If she was in a classroom, because it said very clearly in that clip that she was the only survivor of that classroom of 16...
	Yeah, you're right.
	That makes 15 dead kids in that classroom, plus all the kids in the Soto classroom, then we're way over 20.
	Yeah, you're right.
	You're right.
	So, did you see the medical examiner?
	This is the one, because I was like, okay, I'm done.
	I've already told you.
	We haven't seen it, so who knows what happened.
	But then I saw this medical examiner.
	Did you see this guy?
	No.
	Oh, yeah, no, the big guy, the big old guy with the mustache or whatever, funny-looking guy.
	Yeah, the oaf.
	I mean, if ever, I'm just going to say, if ever there's a guy who looks like a pedo bear, I mean, this guy is it.
	He's frightening, who apparently has been doing this for over 30 years, and just, I pulled a couple clips, and there's a great montage of all of the, actually, the full press conference In the show notes at 472.nashownotes.com.
	And I just want you to, you know, first of all, we see a big, oafy-looking guy who has Tourette's for all intents and purposes.
	Believe me, I can recognize it.
	Oh, he does.
	I didn't notice this.
	Oh, yeah.
	Oh, yeah.
	And then he's wearing a white lab coat, which, of course, gives him instant credibility as a medical examiner.
	I often wear one.
	Yeah.
	Around the house.
	Yeah.
	And, but the questions he's asked and the answers he gives are so uncharacteristic of anyone who has done this for 30 years.
	And he is the medical examiner of Connecticut, okay?
	He's not just, you know, some douchebag from Sandy Hook.
	He's from Connecticut.
	I'm going to play this a little bit of out of order, but as you know, the parents were never allowed to see the kids.
	And I don't even know if they ever saw the kids.
	And it was cheaper to buy into the family's blood flow to a child in Connecticut.
	We did not bring the bodies and the families into contact.
	We took pictures of them, of their facial features.
	It's easier on the families when you do that.
	There is a time and a place for up close and personal in the grieving process.
	But to accomplish this, we felt it would be best to do it this way.
	And you can sort of You can control the situation.
	Yeah, I bet you can.
	Depending on your photographer, and I have very good photographers, but...
	So he says you can control the situation with your photography.
	I've got really good photographers.
	You can take it at face value.
	Don't they have to have somebody identify the bodies?
	Well, let's talk about the identification, which is also all over the map.
	This is his opening of the statement.
	First of all, on behalf of my wife and my sons...
	And why would you, who gives a crap about your wife and your sons when we're, by the way, we're standing in the middle of the woods for some reason for this press conference, which I also don't understand.
	Why are we in the woods?
	And on behalf of my other family, our people at the Office of Chief Medical Examiner, we wish to extend our deepest sympathy.
	And how much does this guy sound like John Goodman?
	It hurts just to listen.
	He sounds like John Goodman.
	To the families and everyone else who has been so hurt by this event, our thoughts and our prayers are with you.
	The office chief medical examiner got here.
	The chief medical examiner got here.
	Did you hear that?
	He's like, the office of the medal examiner, I mean, the chief medal examiner.
	I feel like he flubbed his line or something and he's laughing about it.
	A couple hours after the building was secured, we were here until approximately 1230 last night.
	We thanked the emergency services who built us a temporary facility in the parking lot and we took identification photographs and did preliminary identification on all victims.
	And had everybody transported back to Farmington by about 1 in the morning.
	Now, very important what he says next.
	Our entire staff turned out, started the post-mortem examinations this morning.
	We completed the children by about 1.30, and I believe everybody except the assailant and his mother will be finished tonight.
	So everyone had been identified except for the assailant and the assailant's mother, which he was going to maybe do tonight, or...
	And I'll do those tomorrow morning.
	I'll do them tomorrow morning.
	Wouldn't you want that to be...
	I mean, how do we even know the guy was the guy who we said the guy was?
	Here's the medical examiner saying he hasn't even examined them yet.
	So it seems a little out of sequence here.
	Good morning.
	Lieutenant Vance and staff have a list of the names and the dates of birth.
	Anything else on there?
	Did you...
	So the lieutenant has the names and the dates of birth and...
	Hey, is there anything else on there on that list?
	Anything else on that list that I put together?
	Anything else on that list?
	No.
	Nothing else on that list.
	No.
	And that'll be distributed.
	Hope you got enough copies.
	Hey, hope you have enough copies.
	The guy's insane, John.
	This guy's a total...
	What is wrong with this guy?
	Um...
	Everybody, death was caused by, everyone that we've completed so far was caused by gunshot wounds.
	And obviously the manner of death on all these cases has been classified as homicide.
	He can't classify anything yet.
	It's not his job to classify that.
	I mean, this to me...
	I'm telling you, this whole thing is fishy.
	Now, by the way, the guy that, the Rosen character, who saw the six kids...
	Uh-huh.
	For one thing, he never mentions his wife, which is weird because he brought the kids into the house supposedly, but he says that he saw the kids on his front lawn.
	And he happened to have all these little toys to play with, you know, little animals and stuff the kids could play with at the ready.
	He just happened to have that laying around the house.
	I guess.
	But he said that the kids, he found them out in the front with a school bus driver, which is mentioned in all the other reports.
	Where's he?
	At 9.30.
	Right.
	15 minutes.
	And he had heard the gunshots like 15 minutes earlier.
	But that school was supposed to be on lockdown at 9.30 and the shooting began at 9.45 according to the official report.
	So there's another accounting error here that has to be fixed.
	Also said, according to the Fox, he saw the kids when he was coming back from having breakfast, but then if he was doing that, he couldn't have heard the shots from his house, because he'd be someplace else having breakfast.
	But the other reports had him going to breakfast.
	He could have heard the shots if that was the case.
	And that was in a later report, which makes me think the story was changed.
	And then as he was driving out, and I've seen his house from the top.
	He has a driveway that goes into the back of the place, and then it comes out to the front.
	And there's a huge lawn behind his house, but I don't know if the kids weren't there.
	It's a quarter of a mile from the school to the guy's house.
	It's a long walk, and it's wooded, the whole area.
	People have to look at this school, the Google shots of the school, because this is a large elementary school with a parking lot that looks as if it would service the...
	One of the great football stadiums.
	I mean, this parking lot is out of control.
	It looks like high school parking lots where kids actually drive to school isn't as big as this parking lot, which is really screwy if you ask me.
	I don't know what the point of all these parking spaces are.
	But the woods thing is explained by the fact that the whole area surrounding it is all treed in everything.
	But it's a very strange situation, the layout of the school, this guy's house.
	If you're going to have a press conference with the chief medical officer, why don't you just do it at his office?
	Why is he now in the woods?
	I don't know.
	I don't understand that either.
	I don't get it.
	Because it's all positioning.
	It's all mental mind control to put you into...
	So here's another thing.
	Two things.
	So on Anderson Cooper, there were a couple of relatives of the principal, I think.
	I don't have a clip from it.
	And it was like her nephew or something is like, yes, I'm wearing her school ID. And you look at the ID, and it's like someone made that up on a laser printer just before the show.
	And of course, you would expect the ID to be completely covered in blood.
	It's not.
	I mean, it's obviously fake.
	It really is.
	I mean, there is so much fakery going on in this.
	And then my favorite is the top shot, which I'm unsure if it was done from a helicopter or a jib.
	And you see them opening up the trunk of the car and then pulling out what is either a shotgun or it could be an AR-15 type weapon.
	It's hard to see.
	You've seen this video and then the cop is like unloading shells from it.
	Have you seen this?
	I probably did.
	Okay, but let me tell you something.
	There was a lot of shots I saw, though.
	Jib shots.
	That looked like jib shots.
	Now...
	I don't get that.
	But my most important point is, that is not how you handle evidence.
	If there's a school shooting and there's a vehicle in the parking lot and it has a rifle in the back or any type of weapon, you as a sheriff or whatever that guy was dressed as, do not start unloading shells in the back of the evidence vehicle.
	That's not how you handle evidence!
	There's total posturing for the camion.
	It's bullshit.
	It's bullshit.
	All of this is bullshit.
	This whole thing is very fishy.
	The problem is you can look into all kinds of...
	This is so covered up by...
	Whatever was really going on is so...
	Including this guy, for example, this character who...
	Rosen guy.
	You've got a hard-on for him, so now I'm going to have to look at it because I don't ignore what you're saying.
	I mean, you're really irritated by this.
	Everything is so buried because if you try to do searches on anybody, it's impossible.
	It's impossible to get, even if you do date searches, you can't get past, it's like a huge smoke screen.
	Let me just play one more clip from the John Goodman actor guy.
	So, you know, someone asks him a question, and then he does the most uncharacteristic thing in the world.
	Did everybody hear the question?
	No.
	Did everyone hear the question?
	Did you hear the question?
	It's important you hear this.
	Given what I deal with all the time, is this one over the top.
	I've been at this for a third of a century.
	And my sensibilities may not be the average man, but this probably is the worst I have seen or the worst that I know of any of my colleagues having seen.
	It's probably the worst he's ever seen.
	Maybe not, John.
	Probably.
	Could be.
	But I think it's interesting.
	Yeah, he says probably.
	That's weird.
	Yeah, not really.
	I mean, probably.
	I mean, probably.
	That doesn't make any sense.
	I hope everyone heard the question so everyone can hear my answer.
	What is that all about?
	And he does a lot of like, you know, if I were in court, I wouldn't be able to answer that question.
	But, you know, if I have testified, I couldn't answer that question.
	The guy is an actor.
	I don't know why they put him in here, but you must watch this video.
	And he's got Tourette's and he's shaking.
	He does weird shit with his head and sounds.
	Even if he's the real deal, just don't put this guy on television.
	And now, he has turned to...
	Hold on a second.
	He has brought in the Connecticut geneticist from the University of Connecticut to join him in the investigation of the killings.
	And this is from the Hartford newspaper.
	I'm exploring with the Department of Genetics what might be possible if anything is ever possible.
	This is literally his quote from the Hartford Courant.
	If there's any identifiable disease associated with the behavior of the shooter.
	What is this?
	This is insane.
	This whole thing is insane.
	It doesn't follow any normal pattern of this type of incident.
	And certainly not what we're actually seeing.
	I don't know.
	Like I said, it's fishy.
	It's a mess.
	It's impossible to really not being there or be able to talk to all these people.
	You can't put the same story together twice.
	There's accounting errors all over the place.
	It's just astonishing, the whole thing.
	It's amazing.
	And there's no thesis that's interesting.
	And you go online and it's worse with all these douchebags trying to think everybody's an actor and the whole thing is a scam.
	That's my favorite.
	And the LIBOR guys?
	I mean, this is one of the most amazing things I've ever witnessed.
	My favorite is the Sandy Hook map in the Batman movie, which also has an Aurora sign in it, and that somehow proves something.
	This is a big one.
	It's like, that's suspicious!
	Coincidence?
	Maybe.
	Maybe not.
	I don't know, but it doesn't say anything.
	It really doesn't.
	That's why it's just as good to say Sandusky.
	You can bring that as a Sandusky in there.
	Yeah, it's got the Sandy.
	The accounts that I like the most is they kidnap these children, and they threaten their parents, and they've already sold the children off.
	These are the ones that I think are even more plausible than anything else.
	And if this whole thing is tied to one pedo-bear network, Which would not surprise me at all, and this is where you get these idiots from, because, you know, well, how would people do this?
	Well, you blackmail them.
	This is how people in government blackmail each other all the time, with drugs, with money, or with perverted sex.
	It's how it happens all the time.
	And, well, the thing that's interesting to me, and this has really got to, somebody in Congress has got to do something about this.
	You could actually, I mean, you could create a complete fake situation We had a bunch of actors in it.
	I mean, I don't think this was, but I'm just saying you put easily.
	And then you give the parents, everybody, a national security letter.
	Yeah.
	And you need to shut up.
	A national security letter, which people should look up and look into, is the most onerous thing.
	I mean, you think that the NDAA black bag operation snuck in there at the last minute that you brought up at the beginning of the show is a crappy deal, which it is.
	In other words, you could disappear from Amsterdam tomorrow.
	And be held in some, you know, in absentia some place, you know, in some military court for whatever reason.
	In the Hague.
	And I never hear from you.
	International criminal.
	You ever heard from Adam?
	He disappeared.
	Where is he?
	And there's nothing anyone can do about it.
	It's almost the same thing on a broader scale with these national security letters that only one person's ever successfully fought.
	National security letter, essentially you get one, and it says you can't say you got one, Or you will be thrown in jail just without a trial.
	It's an amazing...
	And it tells you what you can and cannot do.
	You can be told not to talk about one thing or another, or you will be thrown in jail instantly.
	Or you'll be suicided, whatever it is.
	But, I mean, these things are, this is getting out of control, and it's interfering with our show, because we can't figure this particular one out.
	We have all these crazy theories, but it's, you know, we haven't got a clue.
	I don't.
	The only thing, and this goes back to the previous show, the president used my actual words, which I liked very much, and I'm just going to play that, then I'm done with it, as to what this results in, and he actually says some interesting words, which we should probably try and deconstruct.
	Listen to this.
	So this evening I want you and your fellow citizens back home to know how...
	This, by the way, is at the reception for the diplomatic corps.
	So it's all the embassy people from around the world.
	All the fellow citizens?
	Yes, fellow citizens from around the world.
	Oh yeah, the whole thing is kind of New World Ordish.
	But listen to what he says.
	So this evening I want you and your fellow citizens back home to know how much this is meant to all of us.
	To the good people of Newtown...
	To me and to the American people.
	You've stood with us just as we've stood with you in similar moments, whether it's been a Scottish village, an Australian town, most recently the terrible tragedy at a youth camp in Norway, whether it's a tsunami that strikes or an earthquake that levels communities or when a young girl is targeted and nearly killed just for wanting to go to school.
	We're reminded that terrible things happen in this world, but there are more people of good will than people of ill will.
	And that if we can just remind ourselves of our common humanity, perhaps we can make progress.
	These are moments that pierce through all the noise of our daily lives, and they speak to a larger truth that permeates our work together.
	You turn on the TV, you open the newspaper, and every day it seems we're bombarded with images of tension and conflict and division and differences.
	And that sometimes seems to validate those who believe that civilizations are destined to clash.
	So I found this a very interesting sentence.
	ahem These are moments that pierce through the noise of our daily lives, and they speak to a larger truth That permeates our work together.
	Permeates means spread throughout.
	You turn on the TV, you open the newspaper, every day it seems we're bombarded with images of tension and conflict.
	This is my strategy of tension that I talked about.
	And division and differences, and that sometimes seems to validate those who believe that civilizations are destined to clash.
	Is he not just exactly saying what the whole strategy is?
	I have no idea.
	Thanks.
	Sorry.
	I mean, it's a weird thing that he said, and he's like, I think it was, I don't know, it sounds like he was rambling to me, but...
	Well, it's written down.
	Some speechwriter came up with it.
	These are moments that pierce through all the noise.
	They speak to a larger truth that permeates our work together.
	Yeah, so these are all the embassies, and it spreads through their work together to basically create havoc and tension that is seen on TV that messes with people's heads.
	That's the way I read it.
	And he's celebrating that with these douchebags at their dinner.
	Huh, that's an interesting theory.
	Well, I just can't deconstruct the words any differently.
	And by the way, he says whether it's a Scottish village, Dumblain, an Australian town or a youth camp in Norway.
	I know the youth camp in Norway.
	I know the Scottish village.
	What happened in an Australian town?
	Was there some massacre that I missed?
	Yeah, yeah.
	No, that's the big massacre that resulted in the, it was called the something massacre, I think, that resulted in them rounding up all the guns in Australia.
	Uh-huh.
	There you go.
	This is not by coincidence.
	These words are chosen for a reason.
	I'm going to show myself all by donating to No Agenda.
	Imagine all the people who could do that.
	Oh yeah, that'd be fab.
	Yeah, on No Agenda in the morning.
	So we have some people to thank for this show 472.
	By the way, we're heading on to show 500.
	Don't we have some other cool numbers coming up before 500?
	I know someone sent us an email recently with that.
	484 would be good.
	Ooh, there they go.
	I've got to look up that email.
	I'll look up the email.
	Yeah, we had an email.
	And I always think, you know, I should put all these things on the calendar and then...
	We never do anything.
	We're idiots.
	We suck.
	We totally suck.
	Well, we don't suck in doing the show, but we don't do as much as we could to keep the show going.
	And so what people should do is email us now for the next show.
	No, it's too late already.
	Yeah, if you have an idea or something.
	Yeah, exactly.
	I mean, we're welcome to listen to it.
	In fact, we did get...
	Before we start the donation segment, let me open up this...
	Where is that email?
	There it is.
	The note that we got from one of our dames, and I thought it was a pretty good idea.
	It's Dame Vicki Poole.
	And I just thought this was good.
	Okay.
	She says...
	I had an idea as a producer and a dame, I would not mind funding the shipping cost for receiving the new knighthood pin, as you discussed on Thursday's show.
	If you ask, I bet, and I think she might be right here, I'll bet that most of us wouldn't want the show to be penalized because of this new advertising, quote-unquote, from N.A. How about $33.33 for shipping?
	I certainly wouldn't mind sending in the magic number to support the greatest podcast in the universe.
	And I thought this was an interesting idea.
	Right.
	And it does a couple of different things.
	One, the problem is getting these pins to all the nights.
	A lot of people have moved.
	We're not in touch with them anymore.
	We don't have their addresses.
	So if they send in the magic numbers, then we'll know exactly where to send them the pin.
	That's an administrative nightmare we remove right there.
	And it would be good for the show.
	It's income, and it's also, most of the dames and knights, to be honest about it, are very generous.
	And so it wouldn't be like, it's not like charging them a whole new knighthood to get the pin.
	Right.
	So anyway, I just thought that would be something.
	If anybody, any knights and dames out there have anything to say about this, we'll be listening.
	Okay, so let's thank some people.
	Starting with Eric Nagel, Sir Eric to you, from Boonschoten Spakenberg.
	So I think it's Eric Nagel, Sir Eric Nagel from Boonschoten Spakenberg.
	I got the Boonschoten Spakenberg.
	No, you nailed it.
	You totally nailed it.
	Instead of giving to Sirius Request in 2012 in the Netherlands, they've gone and given...
	That's the douchebags.
	That's the disc jockeys in the glass house.
	It's called Sirius Request.
	That's those guys.
	Coincidentally, they've gone and given it directly to the douchebags at the Red Cross.
	I donate my money to the best podcast in the universe, $124.07.
	Exactly.
	That's how we roll.
	Thank you, Sir Eric Nachl.
	Name Joni Odafray in Morgantown, West Virginia.
	You're old stomping grounds.
	Went through my donation.
	Hope my donation went through.
	PayPal was acting a bit sketchy, so let me know if you can receive blah, blah, blah.
	It's official.
	Karma works.
	I asked for travel karma for a dive trip last month and lowly.
	The Pittsburgh area...
	Hey, John, John, John, John, hold on a second.
	Hold up, John, John, hold on.
	Let's reconnect.
	All of a sudden, Mumble just went nuts, and I don't want Joni's thing to be missed out.
	Just reconnect.
	Just...
	Jane Doan.
	DeFray.
	We just love her name.
	$100.
	She says, karma works.
	I asked for travel karma for a dive trip last month, and lo and behold, we were at the Pittsburgh airport being herded into the only open TSA line, which had the dreadful radiation scanner.
	I told her, too, human resources.
	Under no circumstances do you go through that thing.
	Just in the nick of time, a friendly TSA guy magically opened up a metal detector line.
	Molestation avoided.
	It gets even better.
	Human resource number one couldn't dive the first day due to problems equalizing his ears.
	In addition to doing a little internet research evening on different methods to rectify the problem, I called upon my No Agenda Karma.
	And what do you know?
	He was able to dive with no problem for the rest of the trip.
	Wait a minute.
	Some of the most amazing sea life, too many of which you don't always get to see.
	Credit No Agenda Karma for a great vacation.
	Wait a minute.
	Did she just do like a little...
	Oh, karma, come to me.
	I love it.
	That's great.
	Teach me how to do that, Joni.
	She wishes us a Merry Christmas.
	Thank you very much.
	Ed Laboutillier in Hesperia, California.
	Home of the Hesperians.
	It's Ed Laboutier, according to this.
	No, Laboutier is what I said.
	Name is French.
	Stop ragging on us, or the French.
	You're not in French.
	You're in Hesperia, California.
	It doesn't count, dude.
	It doesn't count.
	You're import.
	Hail and good yule.
	Don't eat me Hillary and two shots to the head.
	Almost too delicious to believe.
	Don't eat me Hillary Clinton!
	Hold on, you stepped on the little kid.
	I'm sorry.
	Don't step on the little kids!
	It's almost too...
	Now I'm sucking.
	Okay, I'm a little discombobulated.
	Here we go.
	Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	It's almost too delicious to believe, my friend.
	Alright, there you go.
	There's your eat me and delicious.
	Is that good?
	Yeah, that's great.
	All right, then we have, let's see, Raymond Williams.
	I look him up.
	I don't find him here, so he didn't leave a note.
	So it's without comment.
	Lafayette, Louisiana, $100. $100.
	$100.
	No, no, it's the next one.
	The next one, yeah, it's $999.
	Sabina or Sabine?
	Sabina, I think.
	Trumpler in Hamburg.
	Deutschland, obviously, because she calls herself a donation sauerkraut.
	We passed the 21st and nothing happened.
	At least we European citizens...
	At least we European citizens, Adam and Mickey, should be safe now.
	Yeah.
	Oh, and Adam and Mickey.
	Okay.
	I don't know about you, John, but you still have some hours, and this is obviously...
	We passed that time.
	If not, please accept my 999 donation at the start of a new eon.
	Keep up the excellent work.
	Your...
	An allotment makes my daily commuting...
	No, it's analotainment.
	Analotainment.
	Thank you.
	Analysis plus entertainment.
	Makes my daily commuting bearable.
	Send a drone again karma combo to all those celebrating weddings and birthday parties in mud huts.
	I don't mind if you pronounce it Dutch.
	In fact, Dutchland.
	In fact, it's always fun to hear you're reading Dutch and German names.
	By the way, how much of the $99.99 do PayPal send you?
	It's hard to read this letter.
	As far as I know, they also charge some money if it comes in.
	Yes, they do.
	They always charge about 5% on everything.
	Everything?
	5% full-blown?
	Pretty much.
	Wow.
	We welcome checks.
	Box 339, El Cerrito, California.
	94530.
	Here's your drone again.
	The drone again.
	ExtraVease.
	You've got karma.
	There you go.
	Thank you.
	Get more nation, Deutschland.
	Okay, so we got Zeb Peterson, Zebedee in Haywood's Heath, West Sussex, 93.4.
	Zebedee or Zebedee, what do you think?
	Zebedee, Zebedee.
	I'll go with Zebedee.
	Hopefully you get this in time for the end of the world show.
	Otherwise, who knows if it ever get read.
	It's a birthday donation for Frank Zappa, whose 72nd birthday would have fallen on 12-21-12, something I think you would have quite enjoyed.
	Can I get a karma?
	You can put Frank Zapp on the list if you want.
	No, he's on.
	We got him on the list.
	Can I get a Karma Fiscal Cliff Ah in that order, which I think might make quite a nice end-of-the-world combo.
	Okay.
	Do you have FZ to the birthday list?
	Yes, FZ is on the birthday list.
	Okay, okay.
	I don't have it in front of me.
	You've got karma.
	I like it.
	That was good.
	It worked.
	Where'd you get that scream?
	I have no idea.
	It's produced.
	I worked on it.
	That's for sure.
	That's it worked on.
	Sir Jesper Holmberg in Duval, Washington, 8888 with a comment.
	That's the 8888 karma.
	Baron von Pelsmacher, the barony of France and Belgium.
	Uh-oh!
	69!
	69, dudes!
	Hey, now!
	He gets in at the top here.
	ITM gentlemen says, the world did not come to its foretold end yesterday.
	I guess it's time to wish the best podcast in the universe.
	Crew, a very Merry Christmas and happy, healthy, non-bogative, yet extremely prosperous New Year.
	May Mary and Alan find their way back to safety to Texas.
	Wait a minute.
	So you're Jeb, I'm Alan, and Miss Mickey is Mary?
	Well, for the moment.
	For the moment, yeah.
	And may Jeb be spared from one too many Ayn Rand jingles in the New Year.
	Yes, thank you.
	Finally, some swazzle enough karma for all the knights and dames.
	Please, why?
	Because it works and they deserve it.
	You've got karma.
	And right on the heels of that...
	Oh, this is funny.
	The spreadsheet finally opened up to end Dame Joni's email.
	I don't see if there's anything we should say.
	She says, oh yeah, we missed this.
	Don't ask.
	She was credited in the conversation and she once...
	All the family...
	You know what?
	Stop.
	Merry Christmas.
	Hold on.
	Hold on.
	John.
	Hold on.
	Hold on.
	Stop.
	We can't hear you.
	It's for some reason whenever you talk about Dame Joni, the mumble just goes crazy.
	No, no.
	Reconnect.
	Wow.
	Okay, so I found Joni's, the end of her note, which somehow didn't come out on the spreadsheet, and every time we did it, it screwed up mumbles, so now we're on Skype.
	But she wants a douchebag call-out for listeners who didn't donate and a no-agenda listener's karma for people who did.
	Okay, so here's the douchebag and the karma.
	All right.
	You've got karma.
	Very good.
	Okay, now we're on to Linus Askingren in Huddinge.
	Now, do you think it's Linus or Linus?
	Well, it's Linus Torvalds.
	Um, well, no, I don't think so.
	It's not Linus.
	Why does he pronounce it Linux?
	Linux.
	Or is it Linux?
	It's Linux, but he's Linus.
	Okay.
	Believe me, he's Linus.
	He's not Linus.
	All right.
	I believe you.
	Hudinj.
	6969.
	Thank you for one more year of the best podcast and media assassination in the universe with Mickey and Adam and the best in Amsterdam and everything will be resolved soon.
	I've just finished Atlas Shrugged, so can I please get some Atlas?
	That's one hot MILF 6969 Karma.
	It's pretty long.
	Maybe you should cut out the Atlas part.
	No, I think that's exactly the part I want to leave in.
	Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand.
	Hey, where's the MILF, baby?
	That's one hot MILF, baby.
	There we go.
	You've got karma.
	Very nice.
	Very good.
	Excellent work.
	Michelle Cartmel in West Bank, British Columbia.
	It's near Spasm, I believe.
	6969, greetings from the Napa Valley of Canada, the Okanagan Valley.
	Oh, that burrowing owl.
	Send burrowing owl.
	This donation, one of the better Cabernets and Merlots in the country.
	This donation is my Christmas gift to my husband, Adriel, who listens to every show.
	Yay!
	John, put some life into that yay, darn it.
	How did she know I was going to not do?
	Anyway, Adriel recently hit me in the mouth.
	Well, not literally, but you know.
	And I've jumped under the no agenda bandwagon.
	We would donate more often and hope to in the future.
	But, you know, living in the Canadian dream of barely getting by, if you would be so kind as to send my sexy husband a too delicious and throw us both some karma, it would be...
	Really appreciate it.
	Thanks for the best podcast in the universe.
	It's almost too delicious to believe, my friend.
	You've got karma.
	I'm actually surprised how few No Agenda Christmas gifts there were.
	This is the first one on the list.
	list.
	I'm a little surprised by that.
	Sorry about what?
	The first what?
	I said this is the first No Agenda Christmas gift that I've seen on the list today.
	Am I losing you again?
	Is that what's happening?
	No, I just didn't.
	No, I'm losing you again.
	I totally am, even on Skype.
	That's weird.
	Yeah.
	Okay, let's continue on.
	Let me try something here.
	As you hear the keyboard clacking of the mad cheese.
	Eric the Schiller message.
	Let me guess what that message is.
	It's just asking him a simple question.
	Hey, are you uploading porn?
	I mean, it could easily be on my end.
	Who the hell knows?
	I mean, I'm sitting here in Amsterdam, for Christ's sakes, jacked off of some Wi-Fi that is a part of the rental unit I'm in, and I'm not saying it's just you.
	Well, you sound good now.
	Yeah.
	Let's try to plow forward.
	Okay.
	Yeah, that was...
	We didn't get a lot of gifts.
	That's funny.
	Well, good for Michelle.
	Ray Matts in San Diego, California, 6969.
	I want to thank the best podcast in the universe for preventing the apocalypse with the power of deconstruction.
	Can I get two to the head, Parliament, little girl, yay?
	Yeah, I think you can.
	Two to the head, Parliament.
	I'll do it in the right sequence here.
	Yay!
	Yay!
	Yeah, there you go.
	Done.
	Consider it done, my friend.
	In Winsen, Felix Hemme, F-E-L-I-X-H-E-M-M-E.D-E. Being a former exchange student in Lexington, Kentucky Nuts, I am using the best podcast in the universe to keep up my language skills.
	By the way, we recommend that to everybody, including Americans.
	Since my return to Deutschland in 2001, I lost a family member almost every year, most due to cancer.
	Just like my dad about two years ago, at the age of 60, my great auntie this year in June.
	Fuck cancer, he says.
	There's just me and my brother left in the Hemaclan, and being the older one, it's up to me to keep up the lineage.
	So I need some special Christmas soisant neuf getting laid karma for the parties during the holidays.
	Thank you.
	Merry Christmas.
	Happy New Year to you all and to your families.
	Keep up the good work.
	And so first of all, he wants us to mention his blog again, felixhemi.de, felixhemi.de.
	And, Felix, if you're going to keep the lineage alive, then the swassup enough is not the right thing to do, but that's just a little tip from your friends here.
	A little tip.
	A little tip from your friends here at No Agenda.
	But I will give you a...
	Fucking gangster!
	You've got karma.
	That's our F-cancer karma.
	What is that?
	That's our F-cancer karma.
	I've only been doing it for the last three shows.
	Okay.
	Onward to Tice Browers.
	Hold on a second.
	The segment's closed, dude.
	Oh, close it.
	69!
	69, dude!
	Onward to lesser amounts.
	Tice Browers and Deventer.
	Deventer.
	Deventer.
	Hey, Joe and Alan.
	Maybe a couple of...
	Maya Culpa.
	That's good.
	A good gag.
	Maya Culpa.
	Get it?
	Maya, Maya, Maya.
	Donation from one of your pooped-out artists.
	It's true, Joe.
	It's a stressful living as a no-agenda artist.
	Making things up as you go on and on and on.
	From one media assassination to another.
	And then the hilarious anecdotes and funny voices.
	Oh, and then wait.
	Did they pick it?
	Did they pick it?
	Ah, no.
	Martin J.J.'s.
	I guess mine was not funny enough or too graphic.
	Anyway, so I got a job, so less time for creating, but I feel fired up when you whine for art, so keep a close eye on you.
	I'll keep a close eye on you.
	Some karma for my girlfriend Linda.
	Without her, I was a bum on the streets of Deventer.
	Deventer.
	Deventer.
	Yes, here's some karma for her.
	You've got karma.
	And we actually, we used his art on the last episode, so it wasn't more of JJ. Yeah, coincidentally.
	Yeah, coincidence, yes.
	Um...
	Sir Brian Watson in Raleigh, North Carolina, $61.94.
	So you can buy Mickey, Mimi, the first three Taylor Swift CDs for Christmas.
	We're trying to get laid this year.
	Thank you very much.
	I don't think that's going to help.
	You know, I've listened to her singing.
	She is one of the great creations of publicity ever.
	She's got a thin voice.
	She's amazing.
	She's really amazing.
	More money than we'll ever have.
	Liberty Deck, Green River, Wyoming, 51 double nickels on the dime.
	Thanking Adam for the show notes.
	By the way, I agree with this.
	I'm all in.
	That's an underappreciated resource which merits this donation in itself, not to mention the rest of the best podcasts in the universe.
	These show notes are astonishing.
	The thing that I like about the show notes, which not many people notice, is every single story that we talk about, we actually keep a copy of the text itself of the webpage.
	It's not always a webpage that we're linking to.
	We have the link to the page, but we have the complete text available.
	Unrendered, no ads, just the text of the story in the show notes, all in these collapsible formats.
	It's shareable, it's OPML, and blah, blah, blah.
	And the reason for that...
	Is these web links disappear?
	They disappear.
	They go away.
	Exactly.
	And you can search on it.
	By the way, you've had some trouble.
	It's really rough keeping the servers up because these Baidu guys and these Korean bots, they're a-holes.
	They really are, you know, and even Google bots are doing a-hole things.
	They have no regard for resources whatsoever.
	They just pound your server, you know, over and over and over again, just trying to find like...
	You put the no robots code?
	No, we want the robots code because we want to be indexed.
	Hello?
	I don't want to say don't search me, but there's no way to say necessarily...
	They do all kinds of crazy stuff.
	They search for proxies.
	I mean, it's just...
	It's outrageous.
	Again, hail and I bow to all sysadmins of the world.
	You have an amazing job that you put up with this crap every...
	I got like four servers I run.
	No agenda news network, the upload portion of that, the show notes server...
	And all the rest is all done by Void Zero.
	We're going to have to make this guy a night next year for sure.
	It's just the crap that sysadmins put up with John today on the interwebs is unbelievable.
	And it's just all tracking bullshit.
	It's sickening to see it.
	Sorry.
	Done.
	I'm not going to stop you on that one.
	Well, I'm just amazed.
	Maxwell Roberts in Crown Point, Indiana.
	Double nickels on the dime in the morning.
	If you're reading this, the world is still around, which is nice.
	With this donation, I should be a knight.
	All I ask for is some karma, and please read Galt's Oath.
	Oh, please.
	Or the knighting ceremony.
	You've got karma.
	Yeah, no, I'm not going to...
	What's Galt's oath?
	What is that?
	Is that a really long thing?
	Oh, here it is.
	Oh, yes.
	Oh, no, I'll do that.
	No, you won't.
	Yes, I will.
	I'm going to read that.
	Why can't I do it for him?
	I have a specific way of doing that.
	Some of the knights don't think this is a good idea.
	I mean, it's one knight.
	All right, I'll do it for him now.
	I swear by my life and my love of it that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.
	Great.
	Howard G. Hill III, Sir Howard G. Hill to you.
	Akron, Ohio, double nickels on the dime.
	Now, lost you again.
	Okay.
	Come back.
	Do it again.
	Yeah, come back.
	Yeah, you're back.
	Howard G. Hill, Sir Howard G. Hill, Akron.
	55 double nickels on a dime.
	When I was...
	It's been a while since his last donation.
	I liked the show last week deconstructing the coverage of the latest school shooting.
	I can use some job search karma since my current...
	Runs out at the end of the year.
	End of the year.
	You've got karma.
	Thank you, Sir Howard G. And I'll just do this while John waits for his connection to come back up.
	I can actually see that he's been disconnected, which makes it even sadder.
	Scott Montgomery, brand new, from Saskatchewan, Maple Creek, Saskatchewan.
	A Christmas donation on behalf of my brother Mark.
	Please give him a de-douching and a don't-eat-me-it's-too-delicious-to-believe karma.
	Sadly, I'm still a boner, but hope to make a donation.
	Wait, but you're donating right now.
	Even if you do it on behalf of your brother Mark.
	Hold on, let me see if I can get John back.
	Hold on.
	Wow.
	It's like all of Washington just disappeared all of a sudden.
	That's kind of new.
	Okay, we can do that karma request for you, which was the Don't Eat Me Too Delicious to Believe and a karma to go along with it.
	Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	It's almost too delicious to believe, my friend.
	You've got karma.
	You've got karma.
	And then we have Peter Mulroy from Brooklyn, New York.
	Hi, Adam and Jeb.
	Adam and Jeb, this is new.
	I'm Pete the teacher checking in after a long radio silence.
	Apologies for the hiatus, but fighting the war against Noodles' kids is time-consuming and does not pay well.
	Just wanted to kick in my share for 2013 now that the Mayim demise...
	I have returned.
	Yes.
	Have you figured out what it is?
	No.
	Okay.
	I'm down at Peter Mulroy, Brooklyn, New York.
	You want to pick it up there?
	Hi, Atom and Jeb?
	Yes.
	Peter Mulroy, Brooklyn, New York.
	$50.
	There's only one more after that.
	Two more.
	Hi, Atom and Jeb.
	It's Pete the teacher checking in after a long radio silence.
	Apologizes for the hiatus, but fighting the war against noodles, kids, is time-consuming and it doesn't pay well.
	I just wanted to kick in my share for 2013 now that the Mayan demise is off.
	Thank you very much for the endless hours of work you guys put in to keep slaves like me from jumping off the roof.
	I really believe what you are doing is incredibly important.
	Can I get a Merry Christmas to Sir Matt Nichols, slave Tom Starkweather, and my douchebag dad?
	Also, as a science teacher, I'd appreciate a good old fashioned science.
	Okay, so I think what he's asking for is...
	Merry Christmas, slave!
	Science!
	You've got karma.
	I think it was Pete the Teach, by the way.
	I think he was telling me in...
	We had some emails going back and forth that...
	Was he telling me that 40% of his kids are on some type of meds and actually talk about...
	Maybe it wasn't him.
	I'm sure it's the same for him, that these teachers are just blown away by these kids and all the medication they're on, the Adderall and Ritalin or whatever it is, Zoloft and Xanax.
	But the thing that really upsets them is the culture of kids like, oh man, it's like 10 o'clock, I've got to take my meds, man.
	Did you take your meds yet?
	I forgot my meds, man.
	I've got to go home and get my meds.
	It's the culture of meds that is the most disturbing.
	I would think.
	Yeah.
	That's what it is.
	Except for...
	No, we're stuck with it.
	Except for people who listen to No Agenda.
	People who listen to No Agenda, they're not putting their kids on meds like that.
	And finally, we've got two $50 donations.
	One from Eric Viet in Dublin, California, and Kyle Bauer from Parts Unknown.
	I want to thank everybody who helped us out on the show 472, and we've got 473 coming up, so keep it up.
	We appreciate it.
	Dvorak.org slash NA. So traditionally, well, this is a little shorter today.
	Of course, we're going to see donations drop off for the next couple of weeks as everyone's on vacation.
	I do have a way that maybe we can pick up some of the slack, but I wanted to run it by you if it's okay.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	So my ex-wife, she's a judge on a show here called Dancing on Ice with the Stars.
	I thought she was a judge on the other show.
	Yeah, but that show is over now, so now it's a new show.
	It's Dancing on Ice with the Stars.
	You know, once you get into these judging jobs, you've got it made.
	Yeah, so it's Dancing on Ice with the Stars, and she's saying, hey, look, you're stuck here anyway.
	If you want to make some extra cash, it would be a bonanza if you skate in the competition.
	And I'm like, well, but I need to have my coach come over.
	What do you think?
	Your coach?
	Yeah, you.
	You be my coach.
	Oh, yeah, I know.
	Right.
	You're my skating coach.
	Yeah, come on.
	You got to get this.
	Yeah.
	Would you come?
	Yeah, I'd come.
	You're going to be skating?
	Yeah.
	Can you skate?
	Who gives a crap?
	It's like they want to pay 10 grand or something.
	I'm like, yeah, we can use that.
	What but?
	I'm in.
	That's what I thought.
	I'm like, come on, let's go for 10 grand.
	I'll stand on some freaking skates for that.
	And I said, but I need Jeb, my skating coach, needs to come over.
	Can you imagine us?
	How funny would we be in a huddle?
	Well, I can't skate, so...
	No, you don't have to skate.
	You just have to...
	I'm just a coach.
	You're just a coach, exactly.
	So I would have a megaphone and I'd be yelling at you.
	That's the way to do it.
	Yeah, exactly.
	What would you be saying to me?
	I don't know.
	I'd get some touch.
	Give me some words I can use.
	Okay, okay.
	Do you have a megaphone handy or can you cup your hands and try this?
	Well, I don't have...
	Give me some words to say.
	Okay, okay.
	Hey, clothes suck?
	Hey, clothes suck!
	Sneller!
	Now combine them together.
	Hey, clothes suck!
	Sneller, sneller.
	Dvorak.org slash NJ.
	I'm actually crying, John.
	I know there are at least 10 people who listen to the show who are crying as well, because they happen to speak Dutch.
	Okay, well, I'm scheduled to call with her tomorrow, so I can find out if she thinks it's a good idea.
	I think that if you're there with a megaphone, though, it's a hit.
	It's a winner.
	It's got TV written all over it.
	Hey, still a close-up!
	70 says, hey, happy birthday to Frank Zappa, who did not turn 72 on the 21st.
	I promise you we put him on the list.
	And Dixie Van says, happy birthday to Ryan Van is the gift that keeps on giving.
	Happy birthday from all your buddies here at the No Agenda Show, the best podcast in the universe!
	It's your birthday, yeah!
	And we do luckily have a couple of knightings today.
	People who have made it, remember that we are going to be switching to the pins, the No Agenda pins, which we're all very excited about.
	And I guess we'll be having some additional information about the pins very soon on Dvorak.org, but essentially the knighthood level will remain the same.
	So let's grab our blades here, John, if...
	Hey, Claude Sark.
	You got it?
	Here it comes.
	Perfect timing.
	Stephen Jaffe, Greg Wilson, and Maxwell Roberts, step forward, please.
	Gentlemen, very nice to have you here, and I am very proud to welcome you to the table that is round for the Knights.
	Of course, I'm talking about the Noa General Roundtable of the Knights, and I will hereby pronounce these Sir Stephen, Sir Greg, and Sir Maxwell.
	All Knights of the Noa General Roundtable.
	Gentlemen, come on down for your hookers and blowy rent boys with Chardonnay, hot pants and booze, wenches and beer, Rubin S, women and rosé, Geisches and sake, vodka and vanilla gerbils and ginger ale, sparkling cider and escorts, and mutton and mead.
	And thank you again for supporting the...
	The Best Podcast in the Universe!
	Truly is appreciated.
	I had a quick note back and forth with our drone signage knight from the tri-state area who was arrested.
	You'll recall?
	Yes.
	Knight Atiyah.
	And so he's putting together a benefit.
	And he wanted me to ask if anyone in the listening audience had a band who could headline his benefit.
	So drop me an email, adam at curry.com, and I'll put you in touch with him.
	I think it's kind of interesting.
	Quick little update.
	Just stuff that came in.
	Of course, I have more time to scan the Gitmo Nation East publications.
	Remember the nurse who killed herself?
	Yeah, right.
	Turns out she had tried to kill herself twice before by taking pills and tried to jump out of a window.
	Gee, gee.
	Do you think that might have something to do with it?
	I don't know.
	Maybe.
	That little omission kind of escaped everyone's attention.
	I thought I'd update you on that before they prosecute the DJs, get rid of them.
	And this was just hilarious.
	I love this from The Sun.
	Prince Harry, John, you'll be happy to know, has killed his first Taliban commander.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, this is...
	The story is great.
	Let me read this to you.
	This is...
	I don't know, hold on a second.
	This is...
	And now, back to the news.
	The 28-year-old gunship co-pilot was called on to unleash a missile strike to eliminate a senior terror leader.
	Harry has proved a massive hit with comrades in Helmand, Afghanistan, who have nicknamed him Big H. What?
	They've nicknamed him...
	Is that the way he looks in the showers, or what?
	Big H. Okay, here's a quote.
	We were on patrol, and the Apache helicopters were called in.
	We heard this posh voice come over the radio, and we knew it was Big H. They were tracking a Taliban leader.
	He was at commander level.
	The Apache then let off some hellfire missiles and its 30-millimeter cannon, and boom!
	It was Big H all the way, I tell you.
	So, there's some sappy guy with a towel on his head, poor guy walking around in the sand, and then we got Prince Harry the Big H, with his big H thumb, presses the button, and fires a hellfire up the guy's ass, and now he's like super-duper, kills the top Taliban commander, I tell you.
	How sad and sickening is this?
	My goodness.
	It really is sad.
	That's pretty bad.
	Anyway, so that's the big news over in the...
	That's probably meant to obfuscate the fact that this nurse had tried to kill herself twice before.
	So we've got to put something else in there.
	Big H. Big H to the rescue.
	I sleep better at night knowing that the Big H is firing hellfires at brown guys in the desert.
	I feel much, much better.
	Tatum band commander.
	Yeah.
	By the way, I wanted to mention that we did get a letter from a guy who was...
	No, I couldn't find.
	Mu Fang.
	He just wanted to say that...
	He didn't get his donation note in, so he sent it in by email.
	He says he wants to give, if you don't mind doing this, give the Mayans a douchebag for not pulling off the end of the world.
	Douchebag!
	And he could use a de-douching after speaking ill of the dead.
	Yes!
	You've been de-douched.
	Don't do that stuff.
	That's not a good idea.
	Not sure what that is all about, but okay.
	Yeah, it happens.
	All right, onward.
	Yes.
	I have a...
	Kind of one screwy thing that I want to get out of the way.
	Oh, actually a couple of screwy things I want to get out of the way before we get into the flying saucer talk.
	Oh, very nice.
	I'm glad you brought some with you.
	First of all, let's listen to Julian Assange discuss what's really going on.
	And I thought there was a little piece of new information in here because everyone's kind of forgotten about this poor guy who's been, what, six months in the Ecuador embassy?
	I'm catching up to him, though.
	Yes, well, it's going to take a while because you can't quite catch up unless they do something with him.
	But anyway, play this.
	See if you can find the new little gem in here.
	...of the world for about six months by U.S. intelligence and its allies.
	I must correct an earlier statement that you made, which has become common in the press, saying that I was here in relation to Sweden.
	The reason I am here is essentially in relation to the United States.
	The Swedish government said publicly that it would imprison me without charge, and in such a situation I would not be able to apply for asylum.
	Now, the Ecuadorian government has asked the Swedish government to give a guarantee that I would not be extradited to the United States.
	We have asked a long time for such a guarantee.
	It has been refused.
	All the regular processes have been refused in this case.
	You know, it's an extremely odd and bizarre case, and I encourage everyone to go and look at that aspect of the case at justiceforassange.com, and you can see, report after report, you can see all the material that the police claim to be true,
	and other things that have occurred, the Cambridge International comparative law general condemning the decisions that were made here in the British courts.
	Are you saying, Julian...
	So, did I understand that it wasn't the Swedes who wanted to extradite him?
	It was actually the Americans?
	Well, he says that's the reason.
	He says that's what he believes.
	And to prove it...
	He had the Ecuadorians where they decided to ask the Swedes that they'll send them over there to Sweden if they assured the Ecuadorians that they will not further export them to America.
	And the Swedes refused.
	Well, of course, because they will take away another one of their car companies if they don't do what we say.
	Well, the Swedes should be ashamed of themselves.
	Yeah, well, that's what I thought after ABBA. I'm sorry, I'll give myself a shot for that one.
	Okay, good one.
	Okay, so I got another one.
	I just wanted to do a douchebag call-out for Barbara Walters.
	Oh, hold on.
	Douchebag!
	Okay.
	Well, just play this little thing.
	Tell me if you've ever heard anything like this before.
	And I'll tell you what is in advance.
	She's talking about, oh, she's going to go do an interview with Lindsay Lohan.
	And so she decided to go do the interview.
	And then she says something that I can't believe someone in network television would ever say.
	At great expense...
	I went to visit her at great expense.
	What is she, does she have her pocket?
	I don't think so.
	I like Lindsay Lohan very much, let me say this.
	I've known her for years, and she was a very little girl, child starved, very vulnerable.
	And she said whenever she did an interview, she would sit down and do it with me.
	So last year, last June, at some time and some expense, I flew with a camera crew to Los Angeles because...
	Right.
	I just thought it was douchey.
	Did she not also interview Honey Boo Boo?
	Yes, she did.
	Have you seen it?
	Have you seen the interview?
	Yeah, you can see what's really going on.
	on.
	The mom is actually a lot less goofy than she is on the show, and the kid is out of control.
	Yeah.
	Out of control.
	That kid, there's a kid who needs something.
	Okay.
	Are you done?
	You got more?
	I got one more.
	Okay.
	This is right up your alley.
	I'm surprised you don't have this one.
	The Coneheads in Mexico.
	Coneheads really exist centuries ago in Central America.
	Take a look at these space alien-like skulls found at a graveyard in western Mexico.
	They are apparently not space beings at all.
	Researchers say that the practice of deforming skulls of children was pretty common a thousand years ago.
	The cemetery was found in the village of Onavas as residents were building an irrigation canal.
	Yeah.
	I saw this.
	I saw this.
	What do you think?
	I think those are aliens.
	It's bullcrap.
	Again, it's just a stupid report.
	This stuff has been on the shelf for years.
	They bring it out from time to time.
	It's like the huge skeletons.
	This is bullcrap.
	This is all bullcrap.
	Okay, what about three glowing lights?
	What?
	Okay, three glowing lights.
	UFO skeptics may have a tough time debunking some recent video.
	This was shot last week in Brooklyn, New York.
	Three glowing objects that appear to be moving in formation all at the same speed.
	Now, similar sightings of three glowing lights have been caught on tape in San Francisco and England as well.
	Yes, Chinese lanterns.
	What kind of a bogative, like, crazy second half of the show are we doing here?
	I don't know.
	You're bringing it up.
	I wanted to...
	I've been waiting.
	I mean, you've been playing Honey Boo Boo stuff.
	You know, it's like, you know, Baba Wawa.
	Can I get to something that's actually good?
	Okay.
	All right.
	So...
	Without a doubt, this story was the one that captivated everybody on the interwebs.
	And we are now back to talk about that astonishing video.
	What did we say?
	16 million views on that eagle swooping down in a park trying to snatch a baby.
	We wondered, we asked, was it real or fake?
	And now we know.
	ABC's John Muller is here with the story behind The Hoax.
	So you know about this story, obviously, about the...
	Oh, yeah, but I didn't think it was important enough to bring up.
	Okay.
	Well, so there's a couple of interesting stories, this being one of them, that I think are very, very interesting.
	Because I want you to listen as we fast forward a little bit here.
	workplace because he's going to talk about about the fakery of this video places across the country even george and elizabeth were going back and forth on this one turns out some talented kids nailed a class project and baffles so many of us now we hear from those kids get a closer look at the video and find out how they did it millions have seen it in If you haven't, check it out.
	Oh, s***!
	An eagle swoops in and snatches a toddler at a park.
	Whoa!
	Whoa!
	Or fake.
	This memorable escaped penguin and these miniature flying cars.
	So how...
	So now I've just jump cut through here.
	So now they're going to bring in an expert to show you how they did this fake video.
	And of course, hopefully everyone who is listening has seen this thing.
	Do they do it?
	Clearly this is fake.
	They've shot some video footage here, and they've used over-the-counter software to create a 3D bird and a 3D baby.
	There is a real baby at the end, which allows them to pull off their trick.
	Now pay close attention to what he's about to say, because you've heard these exact words before, and you've laughed at them.
	Joel Payne's been a 3D animator for two decades, working with Spielberg and Disney, to name a few.
	They shot this in a very clever way.
	What they did is they shot the video and they panned the camera as if they were following a bird, but the bird wasn't really there.
	Now just substitute the word bird for plane.
	They were shooting this footage.
	They had to add that in with 3D elements.
	They also modeled a digital double of the kid.
	We might give them an A, but this eagle wasn't picture perfect.
	First, watch the eagle's wings.
	All of a sudden, they disappear mid-flight one more time.
	Wing here?
	Yep.
	No wings.
	Wings, no wings.
	Now take a close look at the eagle's shadow.
	It appears, then disappears, then reappears.
	Wing, no wing.
	Shadow, no shadow.
	WTC7 won't go away.
	Fits right in with what I've been saying for a decade.
	And now all of a sudden, oh yes, we believe that was a fake video.
	What are you trying to say?
	Oh, people who understand, understand.
	Don't worry about it.
	Then let's move on to the Indianapolis, which I still call a droning, which my theory is still as good as any.
	We have an indictment, John.
	This was the blast, the so-called gas blast in Indianapolis.
	And hilarious...
	What they have now come up with, they've arrested three people, and the story now is that the home's owner, Montserrat Shirley, her boyfriend Mark and his brother Bob, conspired to let the house fill up with gas and explode in order to collect insurance money.
	And I love this story because they've really taken it to a full extreme and they are saying that they even called the gas company and said, how much PSI will actually flow into my house if I remove the regulator?
	Of course, you know, the gas company didn't find that strange or anything.
	And then, according to this AP report, they actually programmed the microwave oven to go off at a certain time to then detonate the gas filling up in the house.
	And the reason I love this story is because this is exactly the Bourne Supremacy.
	This is the movie.
	Matt Damon...
	You know, he rips out the gas cord and he sets the toaster and then the toaster explodes it.
	And the reason I love it is because Mythbusters, who everyone's always pointing to, is shut up, Curry, you don't know what you're talking about.
	Mythbusters debunk that.
	They tried to do this.
	They tried to replicate the explosion from the Bourne Supremacy and could not even come close.
	Of course, I put the episode for that in the show notes at 472.nashownotes.com.
	This is...
	The biggest load of scientific bullcrap I've ever heard that you can let your house fill up with gas, enough gas, and then have it detonate with a microwave oven to this extent.
	This was, what was it, 33 houses was our last magic number, have to be torn down because of this explosion, and Mythbusters couldn't even get a shack to fall over.
	This is bullcrap, and the drone story still stands versus that.
	Have you heard this?
	Yeah, yeah.
	And you're buying it?
	No, not necessarily.
	Oh, please.
	It's not even not necessarily.
	I'm not buying the drone thing.
	Okay, but it's just as good as this.
	Well, they're both pretty lame, it seems to me.
	But there's no, like, everyone's like, oh, okay, yeah, that makes so much sense.
	I mean, if you had a bunch of C4 in the house.
	No, no.
	They say the brothers, they literally just let the natural gas flow in after removing the regulator.
	I mean, you'd have to have the house hermetically sealed.
	And even then, what are you going to seal it with?
	Because the pressure would just be too much.
	And then they blew it up with the microwave oven that was timed.
	A couple of things about the microwave oven.
	I guess maybe a real good microwave oven lets you program it in advance so it goes off and starts cooking something an hour from now.
	I don't have one like that.
	Of course, I don't have a microwave oven at all, but I've never seen one like that.
	I think most of you punch in the code, you hit the button, and it starts cooking.
	Well, that's how most people use it.
	But, you know, apparently these people were...
	I mean, honestly, if I even had one, I don't know if I could figure it out.
	How could you figure out how to do all that programming?
	And then you had to put something in it that sparks, because I don't think the microwave oven itself would set off anything.
	So you'd have to put a piece of metal in there or something.
	I don't know if that's discussed.
	Nope.
	Not according to the AP story, no.
	I think the Mythbusters thing is probably, yeah.
	It's not that easy.
	When you have a huge, like a giant pipe, like the one in Brisbane or the peninsula of California where the pipe broke, like a huge gas line broke and then ignited and exploded, yeah.
	But it's just a bunch of gas leaking into the house.
	Did people smell gas?
	I don't know.
	I never heard any reports of that.
	No.
	But I just love how it's just cleaned up at the end of the year.
	Oh, no, it's the end of the year cleanup time.
	We can't keep these stories going forever.
	Well, and the final cleanup for the end of the year, which is also just completely underreported, is this.
	The Swiss banking giant UBS has been ordered to pay a $1.5 billion fine for its role in the manipulation of the London Interbank-offered RAID, or LIBOR, which provides the basis for rates on trillions of dollars in transactions across the globe.
	The rigging of LIBOR meant millions of borrowers paid the wrong amount on their loans.
	The bulk of the fines, $1.2 billion, will be paid in the U.S., with the rest going to Britain and Switzerland.
	As part of its settlement, UBS has also admitted to committing wire fraud through its Tokyo branch on LIBOR rates in Japanese currency.
	I love this.
	I love this!
	I love this.
	$1.2 billion.
	First of all, where does the fine go to?
	Does it go to Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac?
	There's like trillions of dollars in derivatives, in all kinds of payments.
	Lots of shittisons have been screwed by this.
	And then it's like a slap on the wrist for UBS? Oh, man.
	Yeah, that UBS thing is ridiculous.
	And they committed wire fraud.
	Wire fraud!
	Aren't you supposed to go to jail for stuff like that?
	If you did it, you would.
	Well, yeah, then there's me.
	And I think outside of the...
	Outside of it being very cold in Europe.
	Oh, by the way, I think the Ukraine is now minus 50 degrees or something.
	And Moscow, coldest ever.
	Coldest ever?
	Yeah, coldest ever.
	Shh!
	Shh!
	Don't tell anybody.
	Oh, nix.
	Nix.
	Nixnay on the old K. Don't tell anybody about that.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	So, I guess we won't speak before Christmas.
	Yeah, about that.
	Well, Merry Christmas to you, and Merry Christmas to all the No Agenda listeners, that's for sure.
	Yeah, well, definitely.
	Merry Christmas to you, John, and to the entire Dvorak clan up there.
	Is everyone going to be home for the holidays there?
	No, no.
	Buzzkill Jr.
	is going to be stuck down in California.
	Oh, wait a minute.
	With the girlfriend's parents?
	No, no, no.
	They're in Michigan.
	Oh.
	Hmm.
	So he's all alone?
	Sorry?
	He's all alone?
	No, he's with his girlfriend down there, and she's working for a living, and she can't leave because she can't come up here, so he can't come up here.
	Oh, okay.
	Well, I'm sorry about that.
	I'm sorry for BK Jr.
	We're going to have a second Christmas down there, too.
	Oh, okay.
	You want to play the raw audio of this clown in Newtown?
	Yeah, do you think it's good?
	How long is it?
	Is it really long, or...?
	Long.
	It's about five, six minutes.
	But it's entertaining because it's Aaron Burnett asking him stuff and he changes his story and he talks about one thing or another and he goes into kind of a breakdown and starts crying.
	Okay.
	I don't know what you think entertainment is.
	Yeah.
	And then unless something really, really crazy happens, I think we should just stop talking about it because it doesn't help.
	Yes, I would like to stop talking about it.
	I don't want to talk about it anymore.
	Let's ban it from the show.
	Okay.
	Okay.
	We'll put that in the band corner.
	And we're all done.
	Well, anyway, we shall be having a very sparse little Christmas here.
	We have a small Christmas tree about two feet in height, standing on the windowsill.
	Aww.
	Yeah.
	It is kind of weird.
	Kind of weird.
	Anyway, thank you, all of you shittisons, for your lovely letters and emails and words of encouragement.
	We're still hoping to be back in Austin somewhere around mid-January.
	That's what it's looking like now.
	I'll keep you up to speed.
	In the meantime...
	Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton.
	You might get indigestion, hit your head, and, you know, lose consciousness.
	Coming to you from Gitmo Nation Lowlands, Day 17 in Exile in the Morning, I'm Adam Curry.
	And from the Pacific Northwest in the Buzzkill Bunker, attacked by docks from Japan, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We'll be back on Thursday right here on No Agenda.
	Those children on your yard, did you have any idea that something was wrong?
	I had no idea.
	I thought they were doing a skit or maybe they were Cub Scouts or Girl Scouts and they were just practicing because they were sitting so nicely.
	But then I saw a man in a very agitated way saying it's going to be alright.
	He kept raising his voice, and I thought that was so strange.
	And I came to the children, and they were crying and wailing and mortified.
	And there was a school bus driver with them, and I invited them into the house.
	And she said there had been an incident at the school.
	I had no idea what it was.
	And the children, how did they find the words to tell you?
	Because they told you, right?
	They told me.
	They just start talking.
	The two boys mostly talked and they said, we can't go back to that school.
	We can't go back.
	Our teacher is dead.
	What are we going to do?
	We don't have a teacher.
	I was, I could not take that in.
	I could not, I could not accept that.
	And I just kept listening to them.
	And then they talked more and the boy said, oh no, it was a big gun and a small gun.
	And then I knew.
	And then they said there was blood.
	There was blood.
	And then they said her name.
	And I prayed that it wasn't that teacher, and it was.
	It was that very pretty 27-year-old teacher.
	I don't know how they fled.
	I think she must have protected them and saved their lives.
	I don't know if they ran all the way down the boulevard, the street next to the firehouse.
	I don't know how they got to my house.
	They were so brave, and they were so good.
	I brought down some toys for my grandson's toy chest and I gave him some juice and we called their parents.
	They were very brave and very good and I was amazed.
	I was astounded at what they were telling me.
	They noticed everything and I know you're a psychologist by training.
	But you talk about being a grandfather.
	It was the grandfather that was you at that moment.
	That's what trained me.
	Being a grandfather.
	I felt like I was with my grandchildren and I felt perfectly happy with them.
	That's what trained me.
	My granddaughter and my grandson.
	And they were with me and I felt comfortable.
	They were very sweet and they calmed down a little.
	But they kept repeating that they can't go back to the school because they don't have a teacher.
	And their grieving is going to be hard for adults to understand.
	It will be different.
	It may be more intense.
	It just will be different.
	What message do you have for those children that came onto your yard?
	I want to be reunited with them.
	I want to see those children and I want to tell them how good and brave and strong they are.
	I want to tell their parents that.
	And I want to tell them that I want to be their friend and I want to read to them.
	I want to give them something special for Christmas.
	I want to be their friend.
	I want them to see me in light instead of darkness as I saw them.
	I want their parents.
	I hope they'll call me because I want to see those children.
	They were very good children.
	And then something happened with one of the boys out of this grief and this carnage and he stopped and he became very composed.
	And all of a sudden he stopped and he looked at me and he said, just saying, your house is very small.
	And I thought, what a bright, wonderful boy.
	And he just brought to all of us a respite, a respite from all this darkness.
	And you know what?
	I want to see these kids.
	I hope their parents will call me.
	I want to just put my arms around them and tell them that I love them.
	I want the children...
	To be the basis for our solution.
	Bullshit!
	If you wake up with the blues, trying to fill your day with news, there's one thing you must remember, no agenda in the morning.
	For a healthy, balanced news diet, try NoAgendaShow.com.
	Merry Christmas, slave.
	Please don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!
	Don't eat me, Hillary Clinton!

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