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Feb. 17, 2011 - No Agenda

02:05:45

279: Dr. Watson I presume?

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Time	Text
	They have to cross what, in the business, they refer to as the valley of death.
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's Thursday, February 17th, 2011.
	Time for Gitmo Nation Media Assassination, Episode 279.
	This is No Agenda.
	Maintaining my $9 million value as a human resource here at the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West, the People's Republic of Southern California.
	In the morning, I am Adam Curry.
	And from Gitmo Nation Tortilla, where, by the way, I don't have that valuation, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	It's Crackpot and Buzzkill.
	In the morning.
	In the morning, Gitmo Nation castanets, I thought it was.
	How come now all of a sudden there's tortilla?
	That's not a tortilla.
	It's Mexico.
	Actually, no.
	The tortilla is Spanish, as a matter of fact.
	Oh.
	I didn't know that.
	So, in fact, I'm seeking the famous tortilla, the potato tortilla that's famous.
	It's actually an omelette.
	It's not quite the same kind of tortilla, obviously.
	So, yes, I am in España.
	Yes, in Madrid.
	Are you in the old part of town or the new part of town?
	I am in the outskirts of town.
	The slums is where you are.
	No, it's not.
	It's actually a very interesting hotel.
	It's called the Puerto America, which is a hotel where every floor is designed by a different architect.
	Oh.
	And it's pretty much unlivable by a factor of ten.
	Sounds like a mess.
	Totally.
	There's only one plug in this room.
	Really?
	But it's a pretty spectacular room.
	I mean, it's like, wow.
	But again, there's only one plug.
	So you brought a power strip, obviously.
	No.
	So, how did you plug everything in, and do you unplug?
	The laptop's powering everything.
	It's all USB. That's that high-tech stuff the kids are all raving about.
	Yeah, I've heard it.
	It does work.
	My microphone, by the way, is a briefcase, and I shove the microphone in there.
	Yeah, it sounds good, except for the dropouts from time to time.
	It's reasonable.
	Anyway, let me say it again.
	In the morning to you, John...
	And in the morning to you and all the ships at sea and the boots on the ground and the feet in the ocean.
	And the wings in the skies, checks in the mails, bakers in the kitchens, dungs in the pit, astronauts manning the moon and Mars base stations, anyone napping for humanity right now, hams on the air, and human resources throwing shoes and boots everywhere, especially in the chat room at noagendastream.com, noagendachat.net, where you're right, you don't have the valuation, but it came out just this week, John, that...
	The value of a human resource in Gitmo Nation here is $9.1 million.
	That's what you're worth to your government.
	Well, you're right.
	You no longer have it, nor do I. But when you're born, apparently you are worth $9.1 million.
	Huh.
	I guess you're doing it as a way of cooking the books.
	It's interesting because I was reading through the Congressional Budget Justification documents so that you don't have to.
	And so the Health and Human Services...
	I think either Health and Human Services or the EPA has pegged the value at $9.1 million.
	They talk about the human capital, quote, and this is from the document.
	Human capital refers to the stock of competencies, knowledge, and personality attributes embodied in the ability to perform labor so as to produce some economic value.
	Shut up, slave, and get back to work.
	Jeez, it's terrible.
	But isn't this exactly...
	That is the worst...
	I mean, that's just pathetic.
	Well, what it reminded me of is the Paris 1919 movie, which you turned everybody on to, where they were sitting there in Paris in 1919 trying to figure out how much money Germany had to pay to France.
	And trying to figure out, well, you know...
	Based on the deaths and everything.
	Right, right, right.
	A human resource can produce this much in his life.
	And they haven't stopped doing that.
	Well, that's what happened to Ford, if you remember, when the Pinto tank was blowing up all the time.
	They started making a calculation on what, you know, what does it cost to fix the problem as opposed to what does it cost to pay?
	What are people that get killed?
	What is it worth?
	Right.
	And they chose not to fix the problem.
	Yeah, I think nine million bucks was cheap.
	But, you know, I've always read this, it's like one of these conspiracy theory things, but now it's kind of coming true when I do the math.
	You know, there's this theory that goes around, and maybe it's true, I don't know, maybe it's not just a theory, that your birth certificate is actually, you know, it is on official paper, except for the presidents, of course, but it's on official paper, it's numbered, you know, you have like a human resource number.
	I've always read that this is the document that the United States uses as collateral when borrowing money from other countries.
	You know, I've heard this too, and I think it's a myth.
	It doesn't make any sense.
	Well, if you do the math, we're looking at a budget of, what, $2.7 trillion or something.
	We're going to borrow a lot of that.
	Most of it.
	If you take $9.1 million times 310 million Americans, you're pretty close to your $2.9 trillion.
	Well, it sounds like we're a liability, not an asset, then.
	I don't know which side of the balance sheet we're on.
	Well, the unbalanced side.
	Anyway, I've got about $4 million left, I figure.
	So, they're not going to kill me yet.
	I'm still useful.
	Yeah, a little bit.
	So the big news to me this week was they're talking about this sort of thing where people have been dehumanized and the rest of it.
	And, you know, I'm flying over.
	I might as well do a little travel before I get into this.
	Elite business, I mean, I don't like Delta.
	I have nothing but bad things to say about them.
	But I have to say the overseas elite business class, It was actually phenomenal.
	Even though the bed thing doesn't go all the way down, they have these pillows that are the biggest things I've ever seen, and you can get a couple of them, and they're like giant down comforters.
	And I'm telling you, you can really conk out on these things.
	And the food was good, and the wine was decent.
	Now, just to be clear, someone else is paying for this trip.
	You didn't spend our hard-earned, no-agenda cash on Delta business.
	No, actually, Ford's flown me over.
	I did use my own miles to upgrade.
	Uh-huh.
	Because they're expiring anyway.
	Yeah, Ford flew me over.
	They're rolling out their little, the new Focus.
	In Europe.
	They had a big contest apparently in Europe.
	So you're just a corporate shill sucking off the teat of the corporate interests.
	Absolutely.
	And you just gave them a plug.
	You could have said any car company.
	You could have said a car company.
	Okay, a car company.
	I'm cutting that out.
	You know, the point is, it doesn't make any difference.
	The corporate masters are what they are.
	But I got a free trip.
	How are you doing?
	Yeah, thanks.
	Hey, buddy, appreciate the love.
	I'm sitting here in rainy Los Angeles.
	Is it nice in Madrid?
	Actually, it was cloudy, but it was very pretty.
	It's a little cold.
	I went over to the Prado and checked out some oil paintings.
	Then I was walking around Old Town today, and it was extremely chilly, and I had to rush back.
	I have to say, in Northern California, as I left, the last couple of days has been some of the worst storms I've seen.
	In fact, it tore off some of the...
	My roofing, some of the metal that, I forget what it says, what's it called?
	Grass?
	No.
	From your hut?
	Shingles?
	Sheet metal?
	Sheet metal is called something.
	Aluminum siding?
	Anyway, just take my word for it, it was 50 mile an hour winds and pouring rain, it was miserable.
	You know, there's been a lot of that in the news, you know, as this just doesn't stop.
	Flashing, flashing, that's the word, flashing.
	Well, the New York Times, there's a whole bunch of research that's come out that you've missed probably because you were in transit.
	New York Times, definitive study, major paper, a major paper from nature.com, and this is, you know, whenever you do a study, this is how you make the news and then get Hill and Knowlton to promote it.
	Heavy rains linked to humans!
	It's unbelievable.
	And you know what makes sense to me?
	Because we've never had heavy rains ever.
	It's interesting because in the history of life, there's never been heavy rains.
	There was that little thing called Noah's Ark.
	Remember that?
	This can't all be promotion for that animated movie, but it's certainly starting to look like it.
	But they had two guys who did this study.
	It's like 700 pages.
	You have to pay 35 bucks to download it, to actually read.
	They give you a summary which says, Death and Destruction, Heavy Rainstorm, Human Cause!
	And then it's like, you want to read the paper?
	35 bucks.
	I'm like, okay.
	They're actually charging $35 cash?
	Yes, sir.
	Yes, sir.
	Well, not cash, digital credits through their website.
	No, it totally sucks.
	I spent the money and I'm like, ugh.
	You did?
	Yeah, of course I did.
	Well, that's part of what the money is for, is to do research.
	That sounds like a waste.
	Oh, it is.
	It's unbelievable.
	And scientists have long been reluctant to attribute any specific weather event to global warming.
	But a handful of papers that do so are beginning to appear in the scientific literature.
	Stop a minute.
	Aren't these the same people that say that climate isn't weather?
	Yeah, it's the same people.
	Now they have to combat that.
	They're always saying climate isn't weather.
	Now they're saying climate is weather?
	Yeah, it is.
	It's like what they make up their mind is climate weather or is climate not weather?
	It's weather when it suits them.
	The paper finds that severe rains that flooded England and Wales in 2000, which by the way is the year when scientists said children will never see snow again, the wettest autumn since record-keeping began there in 1766, were made substantially more likely by greenhouse gases released by human activity.
	Are you releasing greenhouse gases, John?
	It's just more...
	Seriously?
	In five years from now, it'll be too many people causing rain.
	Now it's just people.
	Humans.
	Too many humans.
	I don't have a clip from it, but I did watch Bill Gates was on the Charlie Rose show this last week.
	Oh crap, I missed it.
	Yeah, well, I have it.
	I think I still have it on the VCR or the DVR. Oh, I can't believe I missed that.
	I'll watch it.
	I'll watch it.
	It was like, ugh.
	Was he on his, like, killing people thing again?
	Yeah, yeah, pretty much.
	He really is.
	He doesn't know that he is because his argument is like, you know, what we've discovered, he's always swallowing.
	What we're discovering, he says, is that when people are healthier, they have less kids and the population declines.
	Right.
	And that's a good thing.
	Right.
	So we've got to, like, kill them early.
	That's basically his thing, right?
	Yeah, no, it's just so many, so many publications.
	Because, of course, whenever this comes out, then everyone jumps on it.
	And no one reads the actual survey.
	No one reads the actual study.
	And it's hard.
	It's hard to get through.
	And what they did is they, again, it's all based on computer models.
	The same computer models, I might add, that...
	Predicted this horrible no-fly conditions.
	Remember the volcanic eruption from Iceland?
	Oh, you can't fly.
	Oh, you're all going to die.
	And, of course, the models were wrong.
	Admittedly wrong.
	But it's the same guys with the same computers.
	And what they do is say, well, now we just took out everything in the model except for the human activity, which they apparently have perfectly measured.
	And then it's clear.
	The science is in.
	Right there.
	It is so obvious.
	Humans are causing this weather.
	So it's not just climate, you're right, but it's also weather.
	Whenever it suits them.
	The researchers were Xiong Qimin and Xubin Zhang.
	The main guys, who you can't really find them in Wikipedia.
	But yeah, I'm sorry, it's $32 is what it is.
	$32 to access the data.
	Because of course it's a commercial outfit, this nature.com.
	So, you know, by the way, I just wanted to back up on Bill Gates again.
	There's something that's been bugging me, and I was noticing this.
	I wanted to bring this up on a few shows ago.
	There's these people that, and Bill's one of them, And you watch them on television, they're very unnerving.
	There's a number of interesting, weird habits a lot of people have.
	And if you've ever seen, for example, The Simpsons and Dr.
	Hibbert...
	Every time Dr.
	Hibbert says anything, at the end of each sentence, he laughs.
	And I've run into people like this.
	If you're in an airplane or something, you hear one.
	They say, well, I know.
	I was just there the other day.
	Yeah, it's nervousness.
	And I bought a couple of tomatoes.
	So anyway, the other one is what I call the inappropriate smile.
	Yeah, no, we've talked about this, but you've mentioned this, the inappropriate smile.
	It's a pet peeve of mine.
	The yak, yak, yak, yak, yak, smile.
	Yak, yak, yak, you know, well, anyway, I don't want to get into that.
	Well, who are you sitting next to?
	Well, the laughing person I sat next to recently, say something, laugh, say something, laugh.
	But it was Bill, again, when I was watching him, because he'll be saying, well, I know, and it looks like the vaccine's a big smile, and then the smile goes away.
	I don't know.
	So anyway, the big news, as far as I'm concerned this week, is the fractal that occurred at the toy fair.
	Oh.
	You'll figure out what the fractal is when I describe this.
	They've updated the Monopoly game.
	Well, they already did this, right?
	I know we talked about it on the show where they have credit cards now in the game.
	Well, it's gotten worse.
	Oh, hold on.
	Let me do the fractal look.
	All right.
	It's basically kind of a new board.
	Some of the stuff's there.
	It's all virtual money.
	No more being able to steal money from your sister and that kind of thing.
	But they've added a computerized system in the middle of it.
	Let me just read this to you and kind of get an idea.
	It used to be in the middle with Chance.
	We'd throw the dice and it used to be Chance and Community Chester.
	You've got the cards in the middle and then the money for the get out of jail.
	Now there's an infrared tower with a speaker that issues instructions and keeps track of the money and makes sure players adhere to the rules.
	In other words, there's a pair of speakers that are blurting out, no, you can't do that.
	No, you can't do this.
	We need to hack it so that it plays like Noah Jingle stuff, Noah Genda jingles and stuff.
	you know like all of a sudden it's like take your meds John It's your turn to roll.
	Oh, no, you don't even roll the dice anymore, do you?
	I don't even roll this thing, this commissar or whatever.
	It sounds like some Soviet idea.
	It sounds like something Stalin would have dreamed up.
	That's horrible.
	Adam, your turn.
	Do you want to buy a house?
	Take a mortgage?
	So these idiots at Hasbro say they hope the computerized monopoly will appeal to a generation raised on video games.
	Ugh.
	Well, this, of course, is the real news that took place here.
	The real news that took place here was IBM's Watson in jeopardy.
	I've been writing column after column about it.
	Alright, so I... Then help me out, because I'm trying to deconstruct what took place here.
	For those of you who do not live in Gitmo Nation, United States, the game show Jeopardy, most Europeans pronounce it as Geoparty, but it is actually pronounced Jeopardy.
	Spelled like Jeopardy?
	It is.
	It's spelled like Geoparty.
	So they had the IBM's Big Watson, which consisted of all kinds of blinking lights and a computer voice.
	And it played along, and of course they had a couple of pre-rounds.
	It sounded a lot like you did a good job in the computer voice.
	I'm sorry?
	You sounded like the computer voice.
	Well, I've been studying this.
	So, anyway, the big news is, of course, that it got a question wrong in Final Jeopardy, although, of course, it actually won the game.
	Just listen to this for a second, and then I have something else to play, which I think is where all this is coming from.
	Final Jeopardy category is U.S. Cities, and here is the clue.
	It's largest airport is named for a World War II hero.
	It's second largest for a World War II battle.
	Thirty seconds, players, good luck.
	I actually took the time to cut out the music because I thought that was kind of irritating.
	I think I can do that.
	What?
	There it is.
	2400 for this final going in.
	And you wrote down what is Chicago.
	That is correct.
	And you wagered.
	$2,400.
	That doubles your score to $4,800.
	Down to Brad now.
	He had $5,400.
	I have to feel that he came up with a correct response.
	Did he?
	Yes.
	And the wager?
	Doing almost everything you can.
	$5,000 takes you up to $10,400.
	Now to our leader, Watson, going into final $36,681.
	And the response was...
	What is Toronto?
	With a lot of question marks, which means, of course, that Watson had many, many doubts.
	Yeah, that's what my computer always does when it doubts something.
	It gives all kinds of question marks.
	This was so bogus, this whole thing.
	I think it was bogus, too.
	I wrote up a column in PC Magazine saying, I think, for one thing, it was essentially, and a friend of mine who wrote a column in SISCON, he says it's like those classic man races horse things.
	You get a horse and a guy runs really quick.
	They run to do them.
	There had to be some kind of message, right?
	Because the thing wins by like, you know, 500.
	I mean, it beats everybody.
	He's got $30,000.
	These schmucks got like $4,000.
	They can't hit the button as fast as this thing.
	No, no, no.
	But this was Final Jeopardy.
	Although in Final Jeopardy, it lost.
	But wait a minute.
	They still won the game.
	But they've got...
	They have some sophisticated voice recognition.
	You can't tell me that...
	You don't play gambling on the internet because it's rigged.
	Computers are rigged.
	Is this to make us...
	It's the only thing I can come up with.
	Is it to make us feel like we can still beat the machine?
	There's still a chance...
	Whereas the whole thing was rigged from beginning to end.
	Of course the questions were already loaded in.
	What, now all of a sudden they have massive voice recognition that they can translate to Alex Trebek?
	Well, they never did that.
	It wasn't done that way.
	There was no voice recognition involved.
	It was the written material that went straight into the computer.
	Right, so they already had that in the computer.
	Well, when they asked the question, supposedly the computer got it.
	Right, right, right, right.
	And all those lights blinking weren't necessary.
	Please.
	This is to train stupid human resources that the computer knows all and that it still can make mistakes, question mark, question mark, question mark, but it still wins the game at the end.
	It's so obvious.
	And you know why?
	Here's the real reason why.
	Going back two weeks in time, this is why they actually are promoting this Watson thing.
	Kathleen Kenyon's excavation of this city mentioned in Joshua showed the walls had been repaired 17 times.
	Watson!
	What is Jericho?
	I love that.
	What is Jericho?
	Fantastic.
	Pre-recorded.
	That's not a synthesized voice.
	It's a vocoded voice.
	After beating two former Jeopardy!
	champions in a practice round earlier this year, IBM's Watson is getting ready for its star turn on the show.
	No more practice.
	Tonight's the real thing.
	Same category, 400.
	But IBM is hoping for more out of the supercomputer than just Jeopardy bragging rights.
	What could it be?
	Why is IBM doing this?
	This goes way beyond playing a game show.
	Watson has embedded in it not only high-performance computing, but deep analytics.
	Analytics that can sift through massive amounts of information to get to answers that are relevant to people who are using it very, very quickly.
	Watson, what is great?
	Yes.
	We hope that one of the next versions of Watson will be, we affectionately call it, Dr. Watson.
	Oh, Dr. Watson.
	What, maybe for the health care bill?
	And it will be applied to the health care industry.
	And we hope that it will help doctors save lives.
	So everywhere that someone comes on to talk about this, bloggers and people, like some chick was on Bill O'Reilly, they all slip it in.
	Well, you know, this analytical, it just shows you the power that's coming to healthcare, that, you know, Dr.
	Watson can really, you know, analyze your problem and within seconds tell you exactly which vaccine you need.
	So, what I found interesting about this, and I knew about this doctor, or Watson MD, I think they're going to call it, is like this whole expert systems for the medical professions first appeared in the early 1980s.
	And then it kind of went on for almost, I don't know, five or six or seven years.
	It was a big deal to have these things because in those days it was cool because you could let nurses run the machine and you didn't need these expensive doctors to do diagnosis.
	And then for some unknown reason, the thing just disappeared out the face of the earth to reemerge as this thing.
	There's definitely some marketing stuff.
	Some?
	Some?
	A little more than we're doing.
	I'm telling you, this was a setup, and they made him win, yet five question marks.
	No, I agree.
	The question mark thing is really weird.
	Well, because it was a setup.
	Oh, boy.
	What a mistake.
	Toronto.
	Yeah, and where did you get Toronto?
	What's the name of the two airports there?
	Do you have your machine handy?
	I didn't think of looking these up.
	But where would you come to that?
	You know, that question is actually, of all the questions they've asked that whole day, that was one of the easier ones.
	Because all you had to do was just take a fixed list of all the airports, and then, you know, in the major cities, and then, and I think it was referred to American cities, didn't they say that?
	So Toronto would be out.
	But whatever.
	John, you're talking like you actually believe that this thing was connected somehow and analyzed the question.
	No, that's what I'm saying.
	I'm saying if this thing, of all the questions that it should have answered easily, that one is at the top of the list as far as I'm concerned because it's just basically a checklist question.
	And if you apparently have all this information programmed into the machine, how come that wasn't in there?
	It doesn't make any sense.
	I'm looking at the reasoning.
	It's screwed up on the clue.
	It comes up with a clunker.
	Whatever.
	It's stupid.
	It's just to teach you slaves that the machine is great and you still have a chance of beating it.
	I can argue with you.
	I'm not going to disagree.
	And the thing that I'm bringing up in a column I'm going to put in MarketWatch is if this thing is so great...
	Where's our search engine?
	I want to, you know, ask Jeeves.
	Is this kind of thing simple?
	You should be able to ask it any English question in the world, and it should be able to answer it.
	If that's true, let's put it online and beat Google.
	Yeah, why bother with healthcare?
	IBM could blow search away.
	Billions and billions of dollars.
	Yeah, why?
	Because it's bull.
	Anyway, I just thought it was funny because everyone's debating how it could get the question wrong.
	Because it's fake!
	It's phony!
	You're being hoodwinked!
	It's Tommy Rot, I tell you!
	Let's thank some people.
	I think we did a good show last week.
	It was reasonable.
	It seems like people appreciated it more than the weeks before, although that...
	I think it's a slow time of year.
	Unfortunately, we've kind of concluded that if we don't throw in a Bieber or Lady Gaga into the show, we just don't get as much donations.
	And everyone's doing that now.
	They're all copying us.
	Justin Bieber said something about healthcare in Canada.
	And so all the news stations, everyone's like, well, you know, Justin Bieber, does he have a point?
	Does he have a future in politics?
	I'm like, oh, brother.
	Justin Bieber.
	Although I will say, I will say, I saw him on the Grammys, which actually was a damn fine show.
	It kind of messed up at the end, as some of these Ken Ehrlich productions do.
	But he was good.
	I have to say, the kid is very talented.
	No doubt about it.
	He's also very personable.
	He's cute.
	He's just cute.
	And he knows it.
	Yeah, that's not so cute.
	So let's thank some people, some executive producers for this show and the producers.
	Brian LaCourchick in Panama City, Florida.
	A nice donation of $500.
	He'll be the executive producer of today's show.
	Wow, and he's a first-time donor?
	Yeah, so it looks like keep up the good work is all he has to say, which I like short and sweet.
	We also have another standalone executive producer, Sir Gear.
	He gave us $444.
	He gave us karma for Sir Paul T. for his exam and university applications for his son Dan for a more rewarding job for his daughter Tina for thesis and exam if you throw a karma at him.
	You've got karma.
	Happy to do that.
	Thank you, Sir Gere.
	That's awesome.
	Colin Sloman in London, the UK. $279 in the $279 club.
	He will be the associate executive producer for show $279 and that will be that.
	He's also a brand new donor and not a boner.
	And how do you spell it?
	Why is this?
	I can't see it.
	Sloman?
	Is that what it is?
	Colin Sloman?
	Yeah, Colin Sloman.
	S-L-O-M-A-N. And so that is the only member of the 279 Club.
	Yeah.
	I thought two came in, but I didn't see it on the spreadsheet.
	I do like seeing the new human resources and their giving levels on the show.
	I mean, you know, Sir Gear is always appreciated, but he's always done so much.
	He's a sir, for Christ's sakes.
	He's a triple.
	Is he a triple knight by now?
	Unbelievable.
	I know.
	Yeah.
	Just a couple of PR mentions that I'd like to mention.
	We've got Green Dice coming out in honor of St.
	Patrick's Day, the green No Agenda Dice.
	Chris is putting that together.
	And you can go to NoAgendaDice.com and they will pre-order the dice between now and March 17th.
	After St.
	Patrick's Day, these green die will be retired!
	Not coming back, and 100% of the profits go to the show.
	Oh, nice.
	Yeah, we really appreciate that.
	A couple of domain name forwards.
	Guy Burton has forwarded worldsgreatestpodcast.com to noagendershow.com.
	Wow, that's a really good one.
	I can't believe no one registered that!
	It's always amazing to me what crops up.
	It really is.
	We have double rainbow all the way across the sky dot com.
	It's an easy one to remember.
	Thank you GLM216 on Twitter for that.
	We have...
	Oh, this was interesting.
	Hi, John and Adam.
	This is from Jim.
	I sometimes listen to No Agenda with my Russian wife.
	I bet you she's hot, John.
	What do you think?
	Right now, I'm already thinking, like, I've got, like, Russian spy in my mind.
	And it's a great source of new words for her.
	I'll hear her practicing the new words she's picked up from you guys.
	She says things like, deduced, and douchebag.
	Can you imagine a Russian, hot Russian chick going, douchebag.
	Today, I had your new jingle stuck in my head and sang it a couple of times in the kitchen.
	The catchy tune soon stuck in my wife's head as well, and she started singing to foroch.com slash and a.
	Tvoroch, that's T-V-O-R-O-G, is some kind of cottage cheese type stuff in Russia.
	Thought you might get a kick out of that.
	Go to T-V-O-R-O-G dot com.
	Of course, the jingle was...
	So apparently we're confusing the Russian human resources who are thinking, why do I have to buy cheese to support these guys?
	It's a kind of cork.
	That's why we've got no Russian supporters.
	They're all buying cheese.
	They've been buying cheese saying, we've been supporting you guys all along.
	Cheese last week.
	One more.
	The domain name for it, BullshitFilter.com, now points to NoAgendaShow.com.
	That's a nice one.
	I like that.
	That's another one.
	That's a winner.
	Yes.
	And One Day in Gitmo Nation, the novel, which is, of course, based on this program and approved by the show, even though John's never read it.
	I have.
	I like it very much.
	No, actually, I have the book, and I've been reading it.
	Isn't it funny?
	Yeah, it's very good, actually.
	I was stunned.
	In fact, he should go out and get an agent and push that thing into the mainstream.
	Well, One Day in Gitmo Nation is now available at Amazon, Barnes& Noble, etc.
	So I've got all the links in the show notes at noagendashow.com.
	I guess it won't be at Borders very long, but otherwise it is out and available in digital form.
	It supports the show, so we really appreciate that.
	And you just heard it.
	John kind of likes the book, too, so far.
	I kind of like it.
	I like it.
	It's good.
	The guy's a good writer.
	I liked it very much because it had all of our memes in there.
	Every page is like, oh brother, there's another one.
	That's funny.
	Alright, so thanks to Brian LaKorchik, our executive producer for episode 279.
	Also executive producer, Sir Gear.
	We really appreciate your giving and your love.
	Pulling way ahead of the One Percenter Club.
	And our associate executive producer and 279 Club member, Colin Schloman.
	This is, once again, a credit that you can put anywhere where credit is needed.
	You can put it on your resume, and unlike the phony balonies in Hollywood, we will actually vouch for you if you need us to talk to somebody.
	All the rest of you out there, go out and propagate that formula.
	We need you to do it.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Order!
	Order!
	Stay with me now!
	Shut up, slave!
	You $9 million piece of crap!
	No wonder they look down at us.
	You're only worth $9 million in your entire lifetime.
	Human resource.
	Alright, I got tons of stuff, but I... I got a couple things.
	Thanks for doing clips.
	Did you do clips on remote, or did you bring them with you?
	I brought them with me.
	Okay, cool.
	I actually did.
	I produced the clips, well, on the aeroplane.
	So...
	I've come to the conclusion that Timothy Geithner sounds like Beaver, of Leave it to Beaver.
	I don't think many people remember that anymore, but yeah.
	They might have it still on TV land, but he sounds just like a little kid.
	And I ended up getting some clips, and he also never answers questions.
	He just speaks in government double talk.
	And he nods his head ferociously when they're asking questions.
	You notice that?
	Sometimes.
	But it's all double talk.
	He never answers a question.
	And then when he answers a question, he gives idiotic answers.
	I think I've got three clips there from him.
	One of them is the...
	Read me those titles because I can't get it.
	Double talking investment thinks he has a good deal.
	Thinks he has a good deal.
	This is one of the congressmen asking him a question, basically that, has he ever actually worked for a living?
	And then he says, you know, they're going to give everybody, and small business guys are going to give them a $9,000 break on their unemployment taxes, but they're going to jack them up to $63,000 on the back end.
	And this guy says, what kind of a deal is this?
	But play it.
	Complicated answer.
	I guess it leads me to the next question.
	Have you ever been an employer and paid these taxes?
	I mean, I have.
	I've written the checks every quarter to the...
	I, unfortunately, have been in the public sector...
	Bull crap!
	The Federal Reserve Bank of New York, is that really public sector, really?
	All my life, but I have helped manage substantial organizations of people.
	No fault in that, but it does give a difference in context.
	The reason that I wanted to clarify that, the administration's budget, pages 184 and 191, describes your unemployment insurance proposals as offering $9 billion in relief to employers through 2013, and then subsequently tax hikes totaling $67 billion over the next decade.
	If you were an employer, as I was or many of us on the committee were, paying those checks and were looking at long-term capital investment forecasts trying to decide whether to hire or not hire What to do.
	If you were an employer having to face that decision, would you think that getting, for example, $9,000 in relief now in exchange for a $67,000 tax tab in the future through increased unemployment insurance taxes is really a good deal?
	Oh, I do think it's a good deal, Ken, because our job is to figure out what makes sense for the country.
	It's a great deal.
	What are you talking about?
	Can't you see that it's a great deal?
	I was just flabbergasted.
	The guy says, I mean, it's a set-up question.
	It's one of those questions you ask knowing what the answer is.
	But he actually says, no.
	It's a good deal.
	You think it's a good deal to have your arm chopped off and then getting kicked in the nuts as opposed to having nothing done to you?
	No, no, I do think that's a great deal.
	Can I play a little clip from Austin to hook into this?
	Austin Goolsbee?
	Goolsbee.
	Yeah, so Goolsbee goes to the whiteboard.
	I can just say, I've got to go to the whiteboard.
	I need to explain this to everybody since that little Timmy Geithner messed it up again.
	So he has to explain how this works for the small businesses in America.
	And he has a phrase in here which is just hilarious.
	Here's Austin.
	I'm Austin Goolsbee, Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisors.
	Remember everybody, Austin of course is trained in public speaking.
	He won many, many awards for debating.
	And this is the Austin Goolsbee Show, everybody.
	And today I wanted to talk to you about entrepreneurs and startups in this country.
	So this is him explaining how this works.
	Now, everyone knows that some of the biggest, greatest companies in the United States that employ hundreds of thousands of people started as some person in their garage with an idea.
	This, by the way, yeah.
	Everything started with some guy in his garage?
	Yeah, just so you know.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	And it's responsible for...
	Write that down.
	I never knew that was what...
	Well, you know what?
	I don't even have a garage.
	I got a garage.
	You can use my garage.
	He's got to park the car on the street.
	Austin's got it, man.
	He's figured out how to do this, how to present our next level of growth in this country.
	And over a 13-year period that we had the data, those startup new companies created more than 40 million jobs.
	Wow.
	I'd love to see his data on that.
	40 million jobs in India.
	They've been the great engine of our growth.
	And all across the country, people we talk to have raised issues that startups have trying to get to be big companies.
	So, I'm thinking, yeah, this is good.
	I'm a little entrepreneur.
	I'm a startup.
	Maybe I can get me some help.
	How about you, John?
	You willing to get some help?
	I'm looking forward to it.
	They have to cross what, in the business, they refer to as the valley of death.
	I'm like, have you ever heard...
	I've started several companies in my life.
	Have you ever heard of the valley of death?
	No.
	Unless it's the Small Business Administration.
	Or Washington, D.C. Referred to as the bottomless pit.
	No, it's the valley.
	He has a drawing of a little dude on the left, then a huge drop, like a huge valley of death, and what looks like rocks and stuff at the bottom.
	And then on the right-hand side, a factory.
	So it's like Angry Birds.
	The idea is for the little dude on the...
	We should make this into an app.
	The little dude on the left has to jump over the valley of death to get to the big factory that he really wants to be.
	A series of problems of getting access to capital and other things that they need to grow.
	And it is for that that the president outlined the Startup America program.
	I don't know if I'll play the whole thing.
	Was this a lecture given to an 8th grade class?
	I mean, what's the deal?
	Yeah, this is how your government thinks of you.
	This is the White House Whiteboard and Austin Goolsbee, a hired speaker, to tell you how to cross the valley of death, which apparently is a term that has been used forever by entrepreneurs.
	Startup America is an ambitious effort that enrolls the private sector with the federal government to try to get the...
	There's another website involved with this bullcrap.
	No, but I love how the federal government involved with private business...
	Oh, hello!
	...small business leaders what they need.
	The scam is apparent in just a second.
	He'll tell you what it is.
	We talked to hundreds of small business people around the country to figure out what the important needs were, and we have identified several things.
	The federal government is going to be contributing four components to try to build a bridge across the valley of death.
	We've got to build a bridge across the valley of death!
	It's like John Wayne could play this.
	People, men, we've got to cross this valley of death and get to the factory on the other side.
	How are we going to do that, Austin?
	You're going to lead us across that valley of death.
	Those include, first, access to capital.
	We're putting in an extra $2 billion of matching funds for venture capital and other private sector investors who are trying to...
	There's the scam right there.
	There's the scam.
	They're going to match venture capital with $2 billion?
	What is this?
	Are they in the hedge fund business now?
	It's a bull.
	So it's like Kleiner Perkins and Sequoia and all these guys.
	They're like, oh, yeah, just give us $2 billion.
	We'll put in $2 billion.
	Promise.
	Promise we will.
	We'll manage it, by the way.
	We'll take our fee.
	It's unbelievable.
	This is the elites at work.
	I'm disgusted.
	I don't want to play the rest of it.
	Let's go back to Little Tinny, who's the butt boy of the elites.
	Just play the double talk one and try to tell me what he said, because he never answers the question, which, by the way, is par for the course.
	And I just can't blame him with the Obama administration.
	Obama doesn't answer the questions either, by the way.
	But...
	He doesn't answer the question, but what he says is like if you actually wrote it out, the wrong words are all interspersed, and then there's occasional little phrases that are just chopped in there for no good reason.
	If you actually wrote it out and tried to analyze it, you wouldn't make zero sense of it, and it would actually sound like you're an idiot.
	Timmy!
	There's a lot of fear, frankly, at the small business to the mid-sized business level.
	Of the valley of death.
	No wonder there's a lot of fear.
	John, I can see the valley of death right in front of me.
	I guess my final question would be this.
	If you were an employer and you're trying to make decisions with cash longer term, do you think that with this looming tax hike that you personally would be eager to take on new liabilities to hire people?
	Well, Congressman, again, I would try and look at it as the following.
	I'd say just two things.
	One is look what businesses across the country are doing today.
	We're kicking employees out.
	Okay, so right away he doesn't answer even close to answering the question.
	And he's got that nervous, leave it to beaver kind of sound.
	Yeah, he does a little bit.
	If you look at what's happened to the recovery over the last 18 months, Invisances are expanding investment at an accelerating rate, pretty strong rate, much more rapidly than GDP is growing overall.
	And we've created more than a million private sector jobs just in the last three quarters, much more and much more quickly than the last two recessions.
	They were much milder recessions.
	And so we get a long way to go, but we're making progress.
	Now, I would look at the overall mix of proposals in the President's budget and the tax side, because it is my view that if you look at their overall impact on business and competitiveness, they are very strong, very powerful, help improve investments for...
	Incentives for investment in this country, help improve incentives for innovation.
	We think those are good for growth long term, but you have to look at the overall package of it.
	Not just the specific tax cuts for businesses, but the broader reforms as a whole.
	What does the representative say to this doublespeak?
	Does he say, yeah, that's great, but could you just answer the damn question, little Timmy?
	I appreciate your sentiment.
	I guess if I were facing an increase in personal and capital gains tax rate to 44% combined with things like this, it might create a bit of a disincentive for that.
	But we'll win in a different place on that.
	These people are so stupid.
	They're so stupid.
	What a waste of time.
	What a waste of human space these people are.
	Yep.
	Crikey.
	Anyway, this Geithner testimony went on and on and on.
	It was all the same.
	He never said anything.
	He had all these, you know, basically just beat around the bush.
	I'm amazed you watched it.
	I couldn't watch this.
	I'm like, ugh.
	Timmy.
	Well, I can only get those two clips.
	I mean, I didn't get much out of it.
	I watched the Obama press conference, and I was catching him stammering in a funny way.
	That reminds me, Tavis Smiley, this black interviewer.
	Yeah, on PBS. PBS stammers.
	And what's interesting to me is that the stammer that the two of them exhibit...
	is an identical stammer to such an extreme that I think it's almost like a milieu of Characterization.
	In other words, it's like, you know, some...
	There's certain different sub-communities, whether it's cops...
	Yeah, people who hang out together and...
	Yeah, they start to pick up...
	Right.
	It's like what I always say about radio station guys.
	Off-air, they'll talk like this, man.
	Hey, man.
	Hey, man.
	How you doing, man?
	Hey, man.
	Hey Yeah.
	It's unbelievable.
	And then they go really softly.
	I'm not kidding.
	This is the milieu of radio, guys.
	So you can play the little stammering clip.
	It's very short, and I do have the Tavis Smiley one, which I had on.
	I sent it up a few weeks ago.
	We never used it, but it's very similar.
	But you can play them.
	You can hear them stammering.
	It's very short, but there's lots of stammering in here.
	And finally, do you think the markets will wait two years?
	I should have written all this down.
	Jackie, I'm running out of room here in my brain.
	I'm happy to repeat my question.
	Well, let me just speak to this generally.
	Was that amazing?
	Let me speak to this general.
	He's not a very good speaker.
	Somebody pointed this out, and once they said it, I said, oh, I didn't even think about it.
	He's a great reader.
	Yes.
	He reads it from the teleprompter.
	Dimidity has to ad-lib.
	Smoke comes out of his ears.
	That's what's happening.
	He's good with a short one-liner.
	I've seen him with Letterman.
	He's really good with a concise little joke.
	He's actually quite funny.
	I think he must have a good sense of humor because his lines are really sharp.
	But when he's trying to talk, it's almost close to being stuttering, but it's classic stammering.
	But it's exactly the same and almost over the same words that Tavis Smiley has, his stammering over.
	And I find it kind of fascinating.
	But anyway...
	It would have been more impactful if we had the Tavis Smiley stammer.
	I wish.
	If I wasn't, I'll put them together eventually because this is not going to end.
	Well, a good speaker, unless you want to continue about Obama's stammering.
	No.
	A good speaker is, of course, our Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.
	She can do a speech, boy.
	I don't know if she has teleprompters.
	I don't think so.
	Well, she talks with one word at a time.
	Yeah, but it flows pretty well.
	It seems to, unless you pick up on the fact that she's talking one word at a time, like she's talking to a four-year-old.
	So I don't think of her as a good speaker.
	I disagree with you.
	Well, she had a speech at a university, and it's all about Internet freedom.
	Freedom!
	We've got to have Internet freedom.
	Because, of course, it's very interesting for her to come out and say, you know, we need internet freedom because she wasn't too happy about WikiLeaks slamming her.
	But, of course, you know, we need to disrupt everything and keep those oil prices high.
	We need internet freedom.
	And how dare these evil people in other countries cut down internet access?
	Of course, it's happening here right under our very noses, and we're just oblivious to it.
	We think we're all free.
	So I picked up on something which I needed to follow up on, and I did.
	This is from her speech.
	You can watch the whole thing, which I advise you do, because there's a lot of little nuggets in here, which is kind of interesting.
	She denounces in this as well.
	She actually uses the denounce.
	No denunciation.
	But this is the piece that is a little ditty in here, which I picked up on.
	We'll see if you can find this, John.
	Finding this proper measure for the internet is critical because the qualities that make the internet a force for unprecedented progress, its openness, its leveling effect, its reach and speed, also enable wrongdoing on an unprecedented scale.
	Terrorist and extremist groups use the internet to recruit members and plot and carry out attacks.
	Human traffickers use the internet to find and lure new victims into modern day slavery.
	Child pornographers use the internet to exploit children.
	Notice she says child pornographers.
	Child pornographers.
	Not pedophiles, child pornographers.
	That was interesting.
	Hackers break into financial institutions, cell phone networks, and personal email accounts.
	So we need successful strategies for combating these threats and more without constricting the openness that is the Internet's greatest attribute.
	The United States is aggressively tracking and deterring criminals and terrorists online.
	We are investing in our nation's cyber security both to prevent cyber incidents and to lessen their impact.
	We are cooperating with other countries to fight transnational crime in cyberspace.
	The United States government invests in helping other nations build their own law enforcement capacity.
	We have also ratified the Budapest Cybercrime Convention, which sets out the steps countries must take to ensure that the Internet is not misused by criminals and terrorists while still protecting the liberties of our own citizens.
	So...
	That's the one that I caught.
	She says, we have also ratified the Budapest Convention on Cybercrime.
	Yeah.
	Which means, if we ratify something...
	By the way, she speaks one word at a time.
	I don't see how you get this good speaker out of that.
	I mean, it's hard to listen to her for too long.
	Okay, John, it was a bullshit transition just to get to Clinton.
	Do you care?
	Can you just get to the Budapest Convention for a second?
	Yes, I do care.
	The Budapest Convention on Cybercrime.
	Have you ever heard of this?
	No, never.
	Okay, well, when she says we have ratified that, which apparently we have, which means, I guess, it's a treaty and we now adhere to it.
	It's the law of the land.
	Exactly.
	Yeah, so this treaty actually is restricting freedom of speech.
	Oh!
	Yes, very, very interesting.
	That kind of belies what she just said and went on and on about.
	This is my entire point.
	So I've pulled this up, and there's a couple of things.
	It's about making racist and xenophobic motivated insults.
	Politically correct.
	Exactly.
	Insulting publicly.
	Insulting, mind you.
	Insulting publicly.
	Let me read the Article 5 properly.
	Each party, that means each country that has signed this, which includes the United States of Europe, shall adopt such legislative and other measures as may be necessary to establish as criminal offenses under its domestic law when committed intentionally and without right the following conduct.
	Insulting publicly, through a computer system, persons for the reason that they belong to a group distinguished by race, color, descent, or national or ethnic origin, as well as religion, if used as a pretext for any of these factors, a group of persons which is distinguished by any of if used as a pretext for any of these factors, a group No Jewish jokes.
	Peace.
	Or Muslim jokes.
	No jokes.
	Article 6.
	Also forbidden.
	Denial.
	Gross minimization.
	What is gross minimization?
	This is crazy.
	You win.
	This is the topic of the day that is just a mind-boggler.
	It absolutely blew my mind, and we have ratified this, and I have no idea when this happened.
	This thing apparently came into play in 2006.
	And literally, it's like, you know, you cannot commit the act of gross minimalization of anybody.
	So if anyone says, well, you know, this Muslim thing, you know, I think they're kind of crazy.
	That is illegal.
	It's on the internet.
	If it's on a computer or a computer network.
	And this just blew me away.
	And by the way, she does this all the time herself.
	How many people have not...
	What is the enforcement capabilities of this treaty?
	And what are the fines and punishments?
	Is there any at all?
	Or is it just a bogus treaty that somebody signed just to be nice?
	Well, the idea is...
	That's like saying the Lisbon Treaty is bogus.
	Of course, the elites will apply this whenever they want to.
	But the idea is you sign on to it.
	You must create laws within your own country that adhere to the protocols of the convention.
	And I know how to read these things.
	It's not very hard, by the way.
	It's like a one-pager.
	And you can pull out if you want, but you have to...
	And all of this is just about being mean on the Internet.
	Yes.
	Article 15, and this is my favorite, denunciation.
	Any party may at any time denounce this protocol by means of a notification addressed to the Secretary General of the Council of Europe.
	So you have to denounce it publicly.
	You have to say, we're not going to participate!
	Which, of course, we'll never do.
	But anyway, we've ratified it, and Clinton's right there saying it, so I presume, as a very powerful person inside our government, that laws will be made against racists and...
	You know what's xenophobia, the actual definition, John?
	Well, I know what it is, but what's the actual definition?
	Hold on a second.
	I'll pull that up because I looked it up and I was rather astounded.
	Zine.
	No.
	Phobia.
	Here we go.
	Initially, I always thought it meant the fear of small magazines.
	Well, it could be intense or irrational dislike or fear of people from other countries.
	That is the definition of xenophobia.
	So if I say on the internet, wow, I don't like those Arabs.
	I mean, in violation of the treaty.
	I don't like Germans.
	I don't like Belgians.
	It's like, if it's irrational.
	If it's an irrational dislike, xenophobia is very, very broad.
	You can have a rational dislike, but not an irrational one.
	Right.
	If I have a rational one...
	Okay, here's one.
	Those Belgians are crazy because they still don't have a government after 250 days.
	So that, I think, is a rational fear of the Belgians.
	It just blew me away.
	Blew me away.
	Blew me away, this thing.
	We have to follow up on this.
	I'd like to know when the actual laws are in place here.
	When is ICE going to take us down?
	When are they going to hack our DNS? Get rid of us.
	Well, you know, they shut down 80,000 websites, I think, in the last day or two, by accident.
	By accident, yeah.
	It was kind of funny.
	Very funny.
	Some poor guys, they put the big sign on front of their website that the guy said, child pornographer.
	Yeah.
	It was like they had 84,000.
	Isn't that a lawsuit waiting to happen?
	Or are they exempt from being sued over this sort of Bible?
	Please.
	Of course they're exempt.
	Of course they are.
	So I guess the idea is like one subdomain of this website is like a Geocities in a way.
	Like a WordPress.com actually.
	That's a better example.
	So WordPress.com could easily get shut down the way these guys are doing it.
	And they did turn it back on apparently.
	Yeah, but apparently it took so long to refresh, and some of these things apparently were going to be actually down for a couple of days because of the DNS system.
	They took it down way deep into the system.
	It doesn't necessarily get fixed that quickly.
	It doesn't propagate, no.
	And of course, they have little cute little names for all of these operations where they go and hack people's, hack the internet.
	This is Operation Protect Our Children.
	Operation Protect Our Children, brought to you by ICE. And whenever someone does that, you know they're pedophiles.
	You just don't do that.
	Operation Protect Our Children.
	Oh my God.
	Operation Protect Our Children, Pedo Bear says.
	Pedo Bear has an opinion.
	Just unbelievable.
	I mean, it's...
	I lost a lot of confidence in our Gitmo Nation.
	Oh, and you weren't here, I guess, to see this week's episode of NCIS. Were you?
	You were on the plane.
	No, I think I did see that.
	It was on Tuesday.
	I left on Wednesday.
	Right.
	So, NCIS, they're going after some guy and he's got, like, a nuke.
	First of all, he's got a nuke.
	Like, He's got a nuke in the back of the truck.
	And they have to block this camera footage from getting out on the internet.
	And so the guy is in central command and does the following.
	What do you see there?
	Video footage hasn't been streamed anywhere yet, but they uploaded a copy to a flash drive.
	Oh no!
	They've uploaded a copy to a flash drive!
	Quick!
	What are we going to do?
	NCIS! We've got to do something!
	Help!
	What can you do?!
	First we gotta shoot a couple people.
	Right in the head, by the way.
	In the head.
	They're dead.
	Driver and passenger are down.
	Seven down, one man left.
	Shot him in the head, Mitch.
	Using the nuke for cover.
	Don't miss.
	Here we go!
	Into the lab!
	Hey!
	Empty quiver is secure!
	Need to stop this video, Eric.
	Video's already in the cloud.
	The auto-run script executable is about to go live.
	I'm almost there.
	Eric?
	Video's been disabled, guys.
	What did you just do?
	I used a VNC controller to piggyback the upload with the Trojan and corrupt the streaming data packets by initiating the stack buffer overflow.
	Just like that.
	In English, Mr.
	Beale?
	Oh, I broke the internet.
	Hey!
	That crock.
	By the way, that is NCIS Los Angeles.
	You should get your show straight.
	No, I'm sorry.
	And then they come back at the end and go one step further.
	So, first of all, he broke the internet.
	And now the question is, how did he do that?
	What did he do?
	Shut down the internet.
	What?
	The whole internet?
	Yeah.
	Even Twitter?
	Even Twitter?
	The whole internet?
	Yes.
	They shut it down.
	And our theory is that these shows are meant to suggest mind-controlling thoughts to the human resources.
	And now everyone knows.
	The government can do it.
	I saw them do it on television.
	It's like finding the reflection off the lug nut of the guy in the window three blocks away with the gun.
	All he had to do was use the VNC controller to cause a stack buffer overflow, and he was done.
	He broke the internet.
	The guy's amazing.
	Unbelievable how easy it is for him.
	I think he used some COBOL and SkipLogic somewhere in there.
	The guy's amazing.
	It's crazy.
	Well, I tell you, we've got to work on something.
	The President is visiting as we speak with Mark Zuckerberg.
	Hello, Mark.
	I need my dashboard.
	I'd love to see that meeting.
	By the way, I do have a clip of Obama, now that you mention him, I want to play.
	Just a real quick one.
	This is an example of how you lie by not answering the question.
	It sounds like you answered the question, and this is great government work, by the way.
	it sounds like you answered the question but if you really dissect the answer you didn't answer the question you just suggested an answer have you been placing calls for your friend rahm emanuel for his mayoral campaign in chicago thank you i'll take the last question first uh I don't have to make calls for Rahm Emanuel.
	He seems to be doing just fine on his own.
	We've got to remember that.
	Well, let me answer the last question first so that you forget about that actual question you asked.
	That's a great technique.
	The whole thing is great.
	He says, you know, it's like, so have you still been beat?
	I don't have to beat my wife.
	You know, before we get in...
	Just to answer anything, it's like, did you do that?
	I don't have to do that.
	I don't have to.
	She beats herself enough.
	Okay?
	By answering, there's no, no, yes or no.
	You say, no, I didn't.
	Yes, I didn't.
	Or yes, I did.
	No, I didn't.
	Whatever.
	You say, I don't have to do that.
	I don't have to.
	I don't have to do that.
	It's a great answer.
	Did you steal that?
	I don't.
	That's what Lindsay Lohan said.
	I didn't have to steal it.
	I didn't have to steal it.
	I don't have to steal it.
	I don't have to steal anything.
	So you missed another momentous moment, John, of the Ministry of Truth as Jay Carney.
	This is the new shill who has come in as the press secretary replacing Robert something-on-my-lip Gibbs.
	So he's the new spokeshole for the White House.
	And he has some...
	What?
	I missed his first press conference.
	Oh, yeah.
	I watched the whole thing with bated breath.
	So I've got a couple of quick clips here.
	Of course, the press, he doesn't quite know the order to call on and everything, so he's calling on the wrong dudes.
	They've got really smart questions.
	And they're also taking advantage of it.
	They're like, yeah, let's mess with the new guy.
	And one of the stupid questions is like, Who do you want playing you on Saturday Night Live?
	Please, stupid bitch.
	Stupid bitch from Fox or something.
	Anyway, so there was one really important question, which of course was, hey, what's up with the Iranian ships in the Suez Canal, dude?
	Which happened that morning.
	And he tries to shut it up with a look.
	You know how, this is what Robert Gibbs, this is what all of the Obama administration does.
	Hey, look.
	Hey, look.
	Which means, shut up.
	Look.
	Look, who do you think you are?
	Look.
	And he tries it, but he really messes it up.
	Let me go to Reuters.
	Yes, Jeff.
	Thanks, Jeff.
	Israel said today that Iranian warships plan to sail through the Suez Canal to Syria.
	Does the United States view that as a provocation?
	And how should Israel react?
	Uh...
	Look, I think our position on Iran in a variety of ways is well known.
	I would refer you on that specifically to the State Department.
	Look, you got the look and that was it.
	Yeah, but it was no good.
	It was a bad look.
	No, it was bad.
	Yeah, it wasn't look with a pause.
	And you have to start with look.
	You can't babble around and then say look in the middle.
	It was bad.
	I mean, someone's going, oh, man.
	Actually, I think that they're probably all going at the end like, yeah, you did okay.
	Hey, kid, you did okay for your first day on the job.
	Except for these little ditties.
	And I watch these press conferences religiously on C-SPAN, so you don't have to.
	And I've never seen this guy, black journalist, stands up and...
	He's got a doozy.
	Jay, in the 2008 campaign, the president was so committed to transparency and openness in the process, he said they'd have healthcare negotiations on C-SPAN. Yesterday he said the Social Security negotiations had to be in private, otherwise they couldn't be affected.
	Can you explain why the difference in transparency is healthcare less...
	Can you reconcile those missions, why one is in private, one should be on C-SPAN every part of the process?
	So now, the question is, it's a trick question, essentially, to get him to mess up.
	And everyone pile jumps.
	He's going to start to answer, and everyone's going to pile jump on him.
	He's like, well, not everything should be done in public.
	I mean, not everything.
	The administration is committed to openness and transparency.
	We are also committed to getting things done, and I don't think the President said that every discussion about entitlement reform would be held in private, but I think he made clear, as I think some other of the leaders on the Hill have made clear, that One of the lessons we've learned in recent history,
	anyway, about tackling these big, difficult issues is that it helps to have quieter conversations about some of the issues so that, as the President said, when an agreement is reached, First of all, we can get there and then we all get into the boat at the same time so it doesn't tip over.
	That's the opposite of what the president said about the health care negotiations on C-SPAN. He said he regretted that he hadn't been more open about that after the shellacking.
	Well, like I said, Jake, the...
	So he's trying to back out of the fact that the president said this.
	...negotiating behind closed doors but bringing all parties together and...
	Broadcasting those negotiations on C-SPAN so that the American people can see what the choices are.
	Because part of what we have to do is enlist the American people in this process.
	I would put my plan forward and I would welcome input and say, here are my goals, reduced costs, increased quality, coverage for everybody.
	If you have better ideas, please present them.
	But these negotiations will be on C-SPAN. And so the public will be part of the conversation.
	That's two.
	And we'll see the choices that are being made.
	You know, I respect what the Clintons tried to do in 1993 in moving health reform forward.
	But they made one really big mistake, and that is they took all their people and all their experts into a room and then they closed the door.
	We will work on This process publicly.
	It'll be on C-SPAN. It'll be streaming over the net.
	No, streaming over the net.
	We'll have the negotiations televised on C-SPAN so that people can see who is making arguments on behalf of their constituents and who are making arguments on behalf of the drug companies or the insurance companies.
	But here's the thing.
	We're going to do all these negotiations on C-SPAN so the American people will be able to watch these negotiations.
	Drug and insurance companies will have a seat at the table.
	They just won't be able to buy every single chair.
	And we will have a public process for forming this plan.
	It'll be televised on C-SPAN. I can guarantee it'll be exciting.
	I can play this for another hour.
	C-SPAN. Yes.
	C-SPAN. Lying sack of crap.
	I guess it was bull crap.
	Yeah, and then this guy's trying to back out of it.
	Well, you know...
	And by the way, if you notice the president keeps saying he's the adult in the room...
	It's like, oh my gosh.
	That's an interesting meme you picked up.
	You're right.
	That meme has been for the last almost a month now.
	Yeah, it keeps saying, well, someone has to be the adult.
	All right, well, when is he coming?
	When is he showing up?
	Someone has to be the adult.
	Like your little children, slave children.
	It's very insulting.
	Very, very insulting.
	So, needless to say, this is the type of analysis you won't get on PBS, which is now, for those of you who, you know, we've discussed this many times, but you've got public broadcasting in the United States of Gitmo Nation, which is completely commercialized.
	They sell commercials.
	Commercials, just pure commercials.
	By the way, this last week they were complaining because they wanted to extract, or the Republicans apparently want to Drop the funding for Corporation for Public Broadcasting.
	They don't want to really end it.
	They just want to take a half a billion out of this huge multi-billion dollar taxpayer's money that goes to pay these guys.
	How much was that again, John?
	Half a billion dollars.
	Five hundred million dollars.
	Half a billion dollars.
	What?
	And all we're asking for is $5 a month.
	Yeah, I know.
	We're just low on the totem pole here, but let's thank a few people that didn't help us out.
	Lucas Tehama, $120.
	Sir James Spitzer...
	Actually, hold on a second.
	I think I have a note from Lucas.
	Yeah.
	I just donated $120 for the show.
	Let me explain.
	I'm on the $5 a month program.
	$15 would be more appropriate for the fixed donation to the show.
	That plan, however, is not available yet.
	So this donation is fixing that for all of 2011.
	Recently heard some shows that I like very much.
	See, there's proof, John.
	We've been doing good work.
	Some shows I like very much.
	Keep up the good work.
	Looking forward to receive the next show in iTunes.
	You got it, my friend.
	From Oost Geest, Lucas Tejema.
	Thank you, Lucas.
	Sir James Spitzer, Jamaica Plains, Massachusetts.
	Really?
	Every time I see that, I say the same thing.
	Jamaica Plains, Massachusetts.
	He's part of a slight group of folks, those born after 1900, whose age plus birth year adds to 111.
	So he gave us $111.11.
	Adam, explain how this works.
	People are catching on to it.
	It's amazing how...
	I'm concerned because people think it's like some scam we're running, which it is.
	Anything we can do.
	We don't have half a billion dollars, so we'd like you to take the year you were born in the last two digits.
	For me, that would be 64.
	Add to that the age you turned this year, which to me will be 47.
	If that equals 111, that's good karma for you, and you should consider donating a fractal of 11, which could be $11.11 per month.
	We'd be very happy with that as well.
	Bob Appleby.
	A number of people sent us that mathematical anomaly.
	Bob Appleby in Greensburg, Pennsylvania.
	Your show has become a weekly part of our weekend together as we spend some time and listen to the two of our...
	You're stammering like Obama.
	Mornings or afternoons with your humor and insight into what's going on in the world around us.
	Interestingly enough, both me and my wife have birthday numbers that add up to 111.
	Unbelievable.
	What a coincidence.
	How does it work?
	So here's some real money.
	So he gave us $111.
	Thank you very much, Bob.
	Armin Breuer in Vienna, Austria, who's a common donor.
	Hi, John and Adam.
	I thought I'd give it to the cause once more.
	And since it works each and every time in my favor, I request some more of the glamorous NA Karma.
	Happy to hand some of that to you, my friend.
	You've got Karma.
	Karma going to Austria.
	Scott Fuller in Cumming, Georgia.
	A little something extra this month for a double karma request, 6666, to my wife, Gail, who's about to give birth to twin human resources, not a million dollars apiece, as a matter of fact, and to my brother, Ashley, who needs karma.
	That's double, that's 18 million.
	It is.
	Good job, everybody.
	Who needs karma in his job search.
	Thanks, guys.
	All right, so the double one means we're given a dedouching.
	Good job.
	You've been de-douched.
	You've got karma.
	And a karma to follow.
	Perfect.
	She'll need a de-douching after double nickels on the human resources.
	Be a donor, not a boner, Scott says.
	Alan Martin, Brandon, Florida.
	Really enjoying the show.
	Late, did you touch on this story?
	Love the show Moscow Airport Suicide Bomber Served in Russian Police.
	We kind of glossed over that one.
	We'll get back to it.
	Something's up.
	The only thing that's interesting in Russia is that hot spy.
	Who's doing a fashion line now, apparently.
	Yeah, it should have a perfume out pretty soon.
	Daniel Hunter in Murphys, California.
	Double nickels on the dime.
	Danny Nelliman in Rotterdam.
	Greetings from Gitmo Nation lowlands.
	Adam and John.
	Danny Nelliman from some town in Ultrecht.
	I would say Danny is Nellimum.
	Nailamon.
	And he's from Flöten.
	Flöten.
	Flöten.
	Okay.
	Skyler Viscani, Bakersfield.
	Much easier name to pronounce.
	Double nickels on the dime.
	Jeff Juniper, Whitehorse Yukon.
	Wow.
	That's Skyler, by the way, who's donating every single show.
	Skyler's on a roll.
	Yeah, he's like 55.
	Double nickels on the dime every single show.
	It's amazing.
	Yeah, good man.
	Thanks for the great show you guys do.
	I heard about the slow donations, thought I'd help out.
	I'm a new listener to the show.
	Expect more blankets and water in the near future.
	I'm going to send you some karma so the donations pick up.
	Send us karma.
	Yeah, hold on a second.
	I know a lot of people want to send blankets or water.
	Just send your cash.
	Just send your cash, everybody.
	Ooh, John?
	Oh, John, you're breaking up.
	It sounds like your USB mic is freaking out.
	I got the lost connection here or something.
	No, it's not a connection.
	That actually sounds like a USB problem.
	Hello?
	Something blowing up.
	Yeah.
	Can you unplug and plug in your USB thingy?
	Will that screw everything up?
	Whoa.
	Well, it doesn't sound very good.
	Hello, Madrid.
	Madrid.
	Are you there, Madrid?
	Well, that's really crap.
	What do you suggest we do?
	Okay.
	That's one thing you could do.
	Are you there?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, like what's wrong?
	You got a problem?
	Yeah, I'm here.
	Was it your USB or did you have to reboot Skype or what was that?
	I had to reboot Skype.
	Interesting.
	Okay, let me just stop this.
	I was playing a little uplifting music while you were gone.
	So it's probably better that they don't send us any more karma.
	Yeah, thanks.
	Whoever sent that karma worked great.
	That was Dennis in Plainfield, Indiana.
	Also, we have George Scarlin in Carpentersville, Illinois.
	It was donated before Jason Burke in Richmond, Texas.
	Jason Dozier in Kansas City.
	And Chris...
	Here we go again.
	Kielin.
	Chris Kielin, who just hates me, apparently.
	I very much appreciate John and Adam not singing along with the jingles in Norwich Institute 78.
	I fully agree with John on this one.
	The jingles are a small piece of the art and they deserve to be heard.
	However, last Sunday also clearly indicated that John still has a lot to learn.
	So here's his first lesson of Dutch 101.
	Good morning, Geelen.
	How are you doing?
	Good, thanks.
	All right, now just try it in Dutch.
	I mean, this is why the guy sends in money.
	Can I walk you through it?
	Goeiemorgen.
	Goeiemorgen.
	Meneer Geelen.
	Meneer Geelen.
	Hoe gaat het?
	Hoe gaat het?
	Goed dankuwel, lul.
	What?
	Goed dankuwel, lul.
	Gut, dankjewel, Will.
	Close enough.
	Very good.
	That is a tough language.
	Lori Corby, who's on our knighthood thing, I think.
	And Scott Singer in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
	That's our group for today.
	I have one more mention here from Bob.
	After 15 months, PayPal canceled my $5 a month subscription.
	That's a reminder to everybody that PayPal does this for un...
	But we have no idea why.
	Just cancel subscriptions.
	This one after 15 months.
	I requested an explanation.
	No response yet.
	I am now subscribed to the $4 a week model.
	It's a 300% donation increase.
	Yay!
	Yeah, I'm emailing you because even though, one, my wife had a kidney transplant and the side effects of her incredibly expensive meds only allow her to work 20 hours per week, cutting our income by 25%, and two, my company screwed the slaves on health insurance along with a $175 pay premium.
	I now have a $4,000 deductible.
	I'm still donating.
	If I can do it, every one of those douche knuckles in the 99% can too.
	Keep calling them out.
	And since I was born in 58, turning 53, I will be sending 111.11 when I get my tax return.
	This should cover some karma and a preemptive dedouching for my 16-year-old son who is turning into a regular listener.
	So let me just do a double shot for that.
	You've been dedouched.
	You've got karma.
	Yes.
	We also have to give some make good karma to Edgar Rothermish's son, whose name is, where is it in here?
	Winston.
	He's nine years old.
	He's a big fan of the show.
	Mainly because the kid listens to it in the car when he's driving him around.
	Uh-huh.
	And then Adam's reaction that my son was therefore a douchebag for a little nine-year-old and slapped him with a douchebag jingle.
	I did.
	What can I say?
	My son was devastated.
	No.
	He wanted to follow Adam's advice and immediately coughed up his allowance.
	Oh, no.
	No.
	Now I feel horrible.
	Did I say that?
	Did I say his son was a douchebag?
	I can't remember doing that.
	A little nine-year-old.
	Oh, well, hey, what's his name?
	Winston.
	Winston.
	Oh, my friend, Winston.
	First of all, the cool thing about this show, Winston, is that you now legally can get away with calling people douchebag and your parents won't say anything about it, which is kind of cool.
	But let me give you a massive dedouching, my friend.
	You've been dedouched.
	And some extra karma for you.
	Here you go.
	Stand by.
	You've got karma.
	That should take you through your 18th birthday.
	There you go.
	All right.
	We highly appreciate everyone who has supported the show, no matter what the giving level.
	Remember, even if you're doing the 280 Club, we'll be coming up on the next show.
	280 Club coming up.
	Yep.
	279er Club is closed for good.
	The door is shut on that one.
	You can always become an executive producer or associate executive producer.
	Still, we would really like you to consider our 1111-a-month program.
	I think we delivered the goods.
	Value for Value would give you a lot of insight, news, and information, certainly more than the crap that is on television that they're passing off as news.
	And the place to do that is...
	Dvorak.org slash N-A If I haven't programmed that into your brain enough, here it is one more time.
	Dvorak.org slash N-A A couple of birthday shoutouts as requested.
	Philip Paxton says happy birthday to his wife Debbie.
	And I'm supposed to say happy birthday Debbie baby from your Philly bear and no agenda.
	Colin Sloman turns 50 on the 17th.
	That would be today.
	Happy birthday Colin.
	James Spitzer celebrates his birthday as does Bobby Appleby on the 24th.
	Happy birthday from no agenda.
	Your buddies in Adam and John.
	Hello?
	That was good.
	Yeah.
	That was tight.
	And I didn't sing along.
	It was very hard, but I didn't sing along.
	I know.
	I know how much you...
	I know you...
	You actually want to be a singer.
	Yeah, of course.
	All DJs want to be singers, didn't you know?
	Yeah, I think so.
	Yeah.
	So, second half of the show.
	We've had some huge solar flares in the past week.
	I mean, like, massive.
	And disruptions are expected.
	As the Sun, BBC News even reports, unleashes huge solar flare hurtling towards Earth.
	Strongest flare in years.
	It's the X-flare.
	The X-flare hurdles towards Earth.
	That's the reference.
	It's a vague reference to Planet X. Yeah, of course.
	But this is the BBC doing it, which I think is kind of cool.
	So we can expect...
	Well, in 1972, a geomagnetic storm provoked a solar flare, knocked out long-distance telephone communications across the U.S. state of Illinois.
	And in 89, I remember this one, another storm plunged 6 million people in the darkness across the Canadian province of Quebec.
	And it actually cut off all satellite and pagers in 1989.
	As I recall, that was the time of the pagers.
	Right.
	The pager days.
	And everyone is, of course, still predicting comet...
	Elenin.
	Is it Elenin, do you think, or Elenin?
	E-L-E-N-I-N. This is the comet that will strike the Earth on the 15th of March, the Ides of March.
	Oh, this coming month?
	Yeah, this is when we're all going to die.
	Why are we even bothering doing the show, then?
	Well, we might have...
	Just on the off chance that we're not going to die, I figured we'd just keep it up.
	Okay, that's a good idea.
	And this was...
	If you have not seen this video...
	This is hilarious.
	A video from, I think it was Al Jazeera.
	Was it Al Jazeera?
	No, it was Euronews, actually.
	Now, Euronews is an interesting channel.
	It's basically, they have news, but they have a lot of just unedited footage running the whole time.
	And they had a report on the Egyptian unrest, better known as Uprising in Egypt.
	And there's this video, and you have to see this video in the show notes, noagindashow.com.
	You'll find it under Out There, the heading.
	There is the fourth horseman.
	The green illuminated horseman is actually galloping through the crowds in Tahrir Square.
	It is the most, yeah, it's the most, I mean, there's no audio to play, but when you see this thing, it's like literally, you know, I'll post a link for the chat room, I'll get a kick out of it.
	There's a green, I mean, you know, it's like maybe it's an edited, maybe it's an edited video, I don't know, but you see this like, if you look at this video, you see around a minute 20 in, you see like a green, a lime green kind of horseman galloping through the crowds.
	And of course, the fourth horseman is always the prediction of the apocalypse.
	The fourth horseman of the apocalypse has reared his ugly head.
	The pale rider said to be the bringer of death and the forerunner of hell on earth.
	Well, it certainly looks that way.
	They're taking bets now in Gitmo Nation UK, Gitmo Nation East.
	They're taking bets on which country will oust their leaders next.
	You can bet on anything in Britain, which is so cool.
	Well, actually, Vegas has a couple of shops that you can bet on all this stuff, but I think the Brits have it down.
	Yeah.
	So, yeah, you can bet on which country is going to fall next.
	I love that.
	These guys are nuts.
	By the way, Yemen is high.
	High odds on Yemen.
	Which I don't think is going to happen, but...
	I don't think so either.
	I think one of the other, one of the kind of in-between, the Bahrain seems to be having a lot of action.
	Bahrain is having, yeah, and it's a real problem.
	I would predict Bahrain if I was going to predict one.
	Yeah, it's a real problem because the elites are all upset now because it looks like the Formula One race in Bahrain can't continue.
	Oh, that won't happen.
	Never mind.
	Right, that's what I thought.
	It's like, they're never going to, like, just shut up.
	We've got to race these cars around.
	Belgium, however, Belgium, everyone's had their day of rage and their day of anger.
	A day of rage, I think, is pretty much the meme that everyone's using.
	In Belgium, it's the French fries revolution.
	The Belgians have tried it all.
	They had a day of abstinence from sex.
	They had a non-shaving day, all to no avail.
	The country's politicians have failed to form a government after elections on June 13, 2010.
	A total of 250 days of deadlock, which beats the Netherlands with 208 and 77, and Iraq, actually, which had 249 days that ended in December.
	So it is now officially a true Gitmo nation.
	And on Sunday, 30,000 people gathered in Brussels to express their indignation to make a statement against the division of Belgium.
	That's the Walloons against the Flemish.
	And tomorrow, that would be today, during the Fry's Revolution...
	They're actually calling this the Fry's Revolution.
	The population will demand less nationalism, more togetherness, street parties, music, and French fries.
	More togetherness.
	Together.
	Hands across the Belgians.
	Hey, so I saw a movie.
	You know, when you fly around, you watch movies on these airplanes.
	On the in-flight entertainment system.
	Yeah.
	So I had a bunch of operas.
	I tried to watch Red...
	Or Reds or whatever the heck.
	I think it's called Red.
	It's where it was mentioned in the Golden Globes.
	It was got Bruce Willis playing some spy who teams up with a bunch of old buddies and they, I don't know, shoot somebody.
	I couldn't get through ten minutes of it, so I skipped it and I decided to fall back on our old friend George Clooney in one of his art films.
	So I don't know.
	This one's called The American.
	Oh, I think I've seen that one.
	He's like a gun maker, an assassin or something.
	Like all Americans.
	We're all gun loving freaks.
	Yeah.
	I thought it was entertaining because it's kind of fun to watch Clooney act because he plays this kind of deadpan character.
	He doesn't really do a lot of different characters.
	He plays pretty much Clooney.
	I don't consider him a great actor, but what he does is fun to watch.
	This movie made absolutely zero sense from the beginning to the end.
	There was no motivation for anything to be going on.
	We had no backstory.
	I mean, I did watch the thing.
	Now, at some point it says this movie's been edited.
	Yeah, to fit the format of the screen.
	No, I think there must have been content editing because they took out something that I needed to know.
	All the hot sex.
	Now, I'm reminded of this.
	Do you remember the first time I ever saw Get Shorty?
	Great movie.
	Was on an airplane.
	And they edited out the airplane crash.
	Oh, yeah.
	This happens all the time.
	Because you can't have an airplane crash in a movie on an airplane.
	They didn't show snakes on the plane in the movie either, in the airplanes.
	Right.
	So they took the airplane.
	I guess people, I don't know, what if people watch the movie?
	Oh my God, there's an airplane crashing.
	I'm in an airplane.
	Oh, what am I going to do?
	Yeah, I'm going to die.
	But anyway, the airplane crash and get shorty was seminal to the movie story.
	Yeah, it was kind of important.
	So I watched this movie on an airplane, and everyone's telling me, oh, you've got to watch Get Shorty.
	Mainly because people would say, oh, you've got to watch Get Shorty.
	Funniest movie, great movie, what a great movie.
	Plots and turns and twists.
	So I'm watching this thing, and I come back and say, this movie made no sense to me.
	Why is this movie so great?
	I said, you just don't get it, Dvorak.
	So then about a year later, I watched it on HBO or whatever, and I saw this plane crash, and I said, my God, now the movie makes sense.
	They can't show, just don't show these movies on airplanes.
	Okay, wow.
	Wow, that's great.
	I took you there, I'm just saying.
	Great piece of info.
	Yeah, just so you know.
	They edit out plane crashes and movies on airplanes.
	This is stunning information.
	Do not show these movies on planes if you're going to edit out anything.
	Stunning, John.
	I'm stunned by this info.
	Anyway, the American, Clooney, he kills people in the movie.
	Yeah, like all good Americans.
	And by the way, can I just say something?
	These journalists who keep getting hit and attacked in...
	Are you talking about Lara Logan?
	Yeah, not just her, but there was an ABC guy and they beat him up and took his camera away.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, that was the first guy, though.
	I think the ABC guy that had his camera stolen was the first guy.
	Oh, this happened in Oakland, by the way.
	We mentioned this on the show.
	Yeah, but this was not Oakland.
	Yeah, I know it was in Iraq.
	Same thing.
	The Middle East.
	Pretty similar.
	And I would like to call on my brothers and sisters.
	Our brothers and sisters in the Middle East, they understand that these guys are part of the problem.
	They are the compromised American media system.
	That's why they're beating them up, and rightly so.
	Why else do you think that Anderson Cooper came home before Husni Mubarak left?
	Because he knew he was going to get beat up for real.
	Not just that fake, fake, I got punched ten tons in the head.
	No, because our brothers and sisters there, they know that these guys are the problem.
	So, I call out to my brothers and sisters in the Middle East, Throw your shoe at these idiots.
	Please, throw your shoe at them.
	Make a stand.
	The shoe thing isn't going anywhere, if you haven't noticed.
	I'm not going to give up on it.
	They're just not showing the shoes.
	Don't, like, rape them.
	Throw your shoe at them.
	They are part of the problem.
	Absolutely.
	Anyway, she was raped.
	She was sexually assaulted.
	What does that mean?
	I don't know.
	That means someone touched a boob.
	I really don't know.
	In the United States, that's what it means.
	Yeah, that's exactly what it means.
	Who knows?
	This is the problem with marginalization of the language.
	I mean, you know, sexual assault should be something that has to do actually with the act of sex, not grabbing somebody's tit.
	Well, that could be sexual.
	It could be, but generally speaking, I don't categorize it on the same league as rape.
	Correct.
	And I'm glad you picked that up, because the words do matter in this case, and we don't know exactly what happened, and we probably won't, but it's just being used to incite more hate towards people.
	Here, it's being used to incite xenophobia, which as you know is outlawed and illegal.
	Because Hillary Clinton said so.
	Now a piece of video that has been emailed to me several times is this business with Congressman Ron Paul winning the CPAC, Conservative...
	Party action conference.
	Straw poll, which means the people there vote at this conference.
	And they say, oh, this is the guy who we want to be president.
	Last year, or the last, not last year, but the last CPAC convention, it was Dr.
	Ron Paul as well.
	And we have the video from C-SPAN. And then we have the video from Fox News, who you would expect would be all over, you know, Ron Paul.
	Because he's a real consumer.
	As you recall, in the last show, I had the two backed up things.
	Exactly.
	Well, you had them omitting him from the results completely.
	Yeah.
	But now we have...
	Well, actually, I'll play them in this order.
	Here is what Fox aired, and very interesting...
	The winner of this year's CPAC straw poll is now...
	Okay.
	Well, the winner of this year's CPAC straw poll is Texas Congressman Ron Paul.
	In the end, he was the winner.
	Probably not the reaction he was hoping for when you name a favorite to run for the White House.
	Mixed applause and boos as Ron Paul was announced over the weekend.
	The fiery Texas Republican.
	So, they have all kinds of boos and boos.
	And the guy actually...
	Well, the guy actually accentuates the Fox News shill, actually accentuates it by saying, oh, booze, oh, booze, oh, not what you want from the guy who wins.
	And this is the actual C-SPAN video, undoctored video.
	It is, I believe, I think that, I don't know what Fox aired, because it is not, here's the announcement that took place on C-SPAN, which happened live, okay?
	The winner of the straw poll this year, Congressman...
	That's a little different than what Fox airs.
	You know, the Fox thing is not even the same piece of video, and I looked through the whole C-SPAN, they're still cheering.
	He hasn't even said Ron Paul yet.
	Okay.
	That just goes on for two minutes.
	at This is odd.
	And I'm not sure...
	I don't even know what...
	Why are they got such a hard-on for Ron Paul at Fox?
	Because it's run by the Democrats.
	They don't want a real guy to be the popular guy.
	This is how it works in America.
	The elites determine if you're in the race at all.
	They determine it.
	They determine if you're going to be in the race.
	If you're not on television, you might as well not be in the race.
	So that's why, and you're right, on the last show you played clips where they didn't even mention him in the results.
	First they mentioned that he won the straw poll, and they said, well, we did a poll, and then their poll didn't have him in the top ten.
	It's crazy.
	But it's so obviously bullcrap.
	Yeah, but no one calls him up.
	I know, yeah, they're run by the Democrats or this or that, but Ron Paul is what Ron Paul is.
	I mean, it just seems to be going out of their way.
	You know, as if they're under orders, strict orders, because this is not something I would, I mean, it's not, you could get away with kind of, you know, having a negative attitude, but, you know, trying to present it as, you know, kind of fact and then kind of twist it a little bit.
	This is over the top.
	Well, they're doing all kinds of weird things on Fox right now.
	Let me give you another example.
	Now, when Fox starts to debunk stuff, that's when big alarm bells go off in my head.
	So they interviewed another...
	This is another video that, you know, Fox is propagating this big time.
	And they actually...
	I'm not going to play it, but they go into a whole deconstruction.
	And they're talking to a PR guy who has a uniform on from San Diego.
	And the reporter says, so I hear there was a weapon of mass destruction found in San Diego.
	And the guy goes, oh, oh, yeah.
	And then there's like some PR person off to the side going, he says, oh, not in here.
	The guy's an oaf.
	But then Fox is like, hey, we're calling him on it.
	Something's really wrong here.
	Listen to this.
	Fox News alert on new developments this hour with a stunning...
	By the way, that's Megan.
	Whenever Megan's on, who cares?
	You can lie all you want.
	And apparently accidental revelation that a weapon of mass destruction has been found at a United States port...
	Brand new hour of America Live.
	Welcome everyone.
	I'm Megan Kelly.
	A correspondent in California reporting on security at the Port of San Diego asking the assistant director if inspectors have ever discovered a nuclear, chemical, or biological weapon.
	Watch his response and watch the intervention from the public relations rep.
	Intervention.
	Not at this location.
	But they have found them.
	Yes, well...
	Off camera, the public affairs officer interrupted.
	You never found one in San Diego, though?
	I would say at the Port of San Diego, we have not.
	Have you found one in San Diego?
	We'll just talk about the Port of San Diego.
	No.
	Trace Gallagher, live in our West Coast newsroom on this one.
	Trace!
	Trace!
	Debunk it, Trace!
	Kind of like letting the cat out of the bag, Megan, trying to herd this thing back in here.
	Now, San Diego, as anybody knows, is a major West Coast port.
	So anyways, he goes on to, like, he plays it back.
	Listen to what she says!
	It's clear there's a weapon of mass destruction found in San Diego!
	Now, when Fox does that, you know that they're trying to hype something.
	And the only thing I can think of is that this guy, Rafat Ahmed Alwan Aljanabi, Who was the deep throat...
	Yeah, it's my friend, Rafid.
	Rafid Ahmed Alwan Aljanabi.
	He now has come out and said, Yeah, I lied about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.
	I lied about it.
	And so...
	I'm so confused.
	The Ministry of Truth has given me so many mixed signals.
	So apparently we went to war in Iraq based upon one guy's testimony.
	My friend Rafid.
	Some people are saying, hey, that's bull crap.
	How does that work?
	And I think that Fox has been given the mission to trump some other weapons of mass destruction thing up just to cover it up.
	The FBI now also coming out and saying, there's a 100%, not 99%, Not 90.
	Not a high probability.
	But according to the FBI's assistant director in charge of the FBI's weapons of mass destruction directorate, the chance that the U.S. will be hit with a weapon of mass destruction is 100%.
	We played that clip that took place early last year with Feinstein asking all these people, one after the other, would there be, oh, I think it's 100%, 100%, 100%.
	I agree with him.
	So where is it?
	Pop that sucker already.
	It's supposed to have happened last March or something like that.
	Pop that thing already, boys.
	We're sick and tired of this.
	It's just crazy, though.
	It's just nuts.
	And of course...
	There's something missing from this picture.
	Well, part of it, no, I think it may just be a remnant of the see something, say something, Lucy's emergency votes campaign to get the Patriot Act extended.
	Now, you recall that that was voted down in the House of Representatives, and then all of a sudden, emergency vote, emergency vote, right after Lucy comes out and says, we're all going to die.
	And these guys are everyone, oh, weapons of mass destruction.
	And then the house completely flips around.
	Completely.
	And they passed it.
	I don't understand.
	All these guys, at first they were like, no, we don't need to extend the Patriot Act.
	We don't need to extend that.
	No, we don't need that.
	And everyone flipped around and said, oh yeah, I guess so.
	It looked like it was really bad.
	Lucy said so.
	And now I guess the Senate has to pass it, and then the Patriot Act and its spying on United States citizens and total Gitmo Nation loss of all freedoms continues.
	That's the idea here.
	In fact, Carney got a question about it.
	The new boy on the block.
	block.
	Here's his answer.
	Jay, does the president...
	Jay, does the president want to see the provisions of the Patriot Act extended?
	As you know, it's our position that it would be helpful to extend that for two years.
	You know, we're working with Congress.
	Two years?
	I thought it was a one-year extension.
	That was like a Democrat.
	Two years.
	When Bush put all these crazy things into play, you know, the Democrats were squawking like crazy.
	Oh, the Tom Hartman's out there.
	They're all complaining bitterly about the nasty old Patriot Act.
	And so now their boy's in office, and what do we get?
	Yeah, two years.
	See what we can get done.
	And by the way, would you please not say boy?
	Because that's against the...
	The convention.
	That sounds xenophobic.
	Edit it out.
	Yeah, be very careful of what you say.
	Hillary Clinton's going to arrest you.
	But the answer is yes.
	Does it need to be dialed back in any way, any provision?
	Well, look, I mean, with the, you know, I think what we said is with the, you know, with the necessary provisions in there and precautions that safeguards, but, you know, we believe it should be extended.
	The President believes that civil liberties are adequately safeguarded.
	I think his position on this has been pretty clear.
	It hasn't changed.
	We do want it extended.
	And two years would be useful, we think, so that there's certainty in the community going forward.
	Yeah, certainty in the community.
	Going forward.
	Going forward.
	Yeah, going forward.
	What community?
	Law enforcement.
	Lazy law enforcement.
	That's right.
	Just easy enough to say, hey, let's just tap all their phones and we'll find the guy.
	You remember...
	Oh, hey, did you look into this guy?
	He's got a stock tip.
	Really?
	What was it?
	Oh, it was this.
	Oh, let's write that down.
	What else did you find out?
	Oh, so-and-so's been having an affair with his secretary.
	Really?
	Yeah, I'd say long on...
	You're kidding me.
	We need to go long on Monsanto, John.
	We've had the alfalfa.
	Now, we have just approved genetically modified corn.
	But it's only corn that's being used for biofuel.
	I'm hearing the silence.
	I'm taking the silence as you are stunned that this is being...
	So, all of the food in America, everything, every single piece of food is made of corn here.
	We're a bunch of corn huskers.
	People of the corn.
	We're corn...
	Yeah, we are the children of the corn.
	Yeah.
	Everything we eat is made of corn.
	It's made of corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup.
	It's fake corn blueberries in your cereal.
	Corn, corn, corn.
	The cows eat corn, genetically not meant to eat corn.
	They're eating corn.
	They're pooping corn.
	There's corn everywhere.
	Corn.
	And it's not good for you.
	We eat corn than the Mexicans.
	Yeah, we're just a nation of corn.
	And by the way, we're starving.
	What's important?
	Hey, food prices are rising out of control.
	The World Bank says, oh, the food price is crazy.
	We're all going to starve.
	What are we going to do?
	Let's grow some corn.
	Let's grow some corn and put it in our car.
	But of course, this is a trick to get Monsanto seeds into the system because you can be growing corn in one field that is only going to be used for fuel.
	Right, like there's a sticker on it.
	Fuel only!
	Don't put that into the cow stuff!
	Of course, these seeds will waft over and everyone gets contaminated and this is the entire system.
	The patent on life is owned by Monsanto.
	And it has now been approved by the total shill, Tom Vilsack, who was brought in by the Obama administration, who was a former Monsanto executive.
	And now we're going to have genetically modified corn, which means we have genetically modified organisms in everything in America.
	Everything.
	And it's disgusting and it's sad at the same time.
	It surprises me this would happen.
	Yeah, really.
	Monsanto also has filed patents for frost-resistant trees.
	You called it.
	You called the frost-resistant meme.
	That's happening now.
	The so-called Franken-forests.
	It's going to be something.
	Yeah.
	It's going to be something.
	Well, you know, we really need that.
	It's very, very important.
	But it's, yeah, so we've had three deregulations in a month by the United States Department of Agriculture.
	If you see Tom Dilsack, throw your shoe at him.
	Guy's a total New World Order elitist shill.
	It's just nuts.
	Only for fuel.
	Don't worry, it's only for fuel.
	You won't have any in your food.
	It's horrible.
	Remember Sam Knows?
	Remember us talking about that?
	Sam Knows is this project that started in Gitmo Nation East in the United Kingdom where the government was rolling out a test Where they send you a new router for your internet connection to test the broadband speed to make sure that your ISP is delivering what they say they are.
	Well, the FCC has just rolled this out now to the Gitmo Nation, United States of America.
	Go to testmyisp.com, and there they are, Sam Knows, happy to give you a broadband router, a free high-speed wireless router with, of course, the secret Sam Knows sauce inside, which they literally call the secret sauce, that will, you know, reports back only on your broadband speed, nothing else.
	So I suggest everyone go ahead and get one.
	Go ahead.
	Interesting.
	Do you remember now?
	Yeah, vaguely.
	It has something to do with essentially a spy device.
	Yeah, of course.
	Essentially.
	What is the FCC Sam Knows Broadband Community?
	Well, originally launched as the Performance Monitoring Network, the FCC Sam Knows Broadband Community, is a unique system that aims to gather and report statistical data on the performance of broadband providers across the globe.
	Being able to compare broadband on price, headline speeds, anecdotal discussion and speed tester results just isn't enough.
	The community, with your help, aims to put the information back in the public's hands.
	Very nice.
	So, yeah, it's the samknows.com.
	Sam Knows Secret Sauce.
	They literally call it the secret sauce that's inside their routers.
	Remember, we deconstructed the whole thing with the guy who...
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	So that's...
	Yeah, well, and this is how it works.
	It's the beta test in England, and then they roll it out over here.
	And it's coming to...
	We lap it up.
	Mmm, tasty.
	Free router.
	Hey, we should give anyone something for free.
	Lots of people go, well, yeah.
	I'll take a free router.
	Ooh!
	It's shiny!
	Just getting one and then having somebody tear the thing down and find out what the hell is really going on with these things.
	We have skill sets.
	It would be good.
	Maybe some of our sysadmins can do it.
	I don't know if you can take it apart.
	It's going to be kind of hard, I think.
	It's all the secret sauce.
	It's the Sam knows.
	It's so ominous.
	Sam knows.
	Like Uncle Sam knows.
	Don't you understand that they're laughing at you in your face?
	Sam knows.
	Who's Sam?
	Uncle Sam.
	Sam knows.
	Uncle Sam knows.
	Because we gave you a free broadband router.
	Enjoy your free router.
	That's one way of getting around the...
	You say, well, you volunteered.
	Yeah.
	You're part of the community.
	You can't be lying on me.
	You volunteered.
	Part of the community.
	Join the community.
	It's award show season and no different in show business for ugly people.
	As the 2010 Presidential Medal of Freedom Ceremony was held at the White House.
	Yeah, well, at least Stan Musial finally got his medal.
	As did George H. Walker Bush.
	I found that to be highly amusing.
	He could barely walk, actually.
	You see that?
	The guy can't walk anymore.
	No, they've taken the walker.
	He's got a walker.
	George Walker Bush.
	And everyone's applauding him.
	It's a joke.
	Sorry about that.
	No, but everyone's applauding him.
	He's the leader of the New World.
	Well, he was.
	I don't think he is.
	He gave it up.
	He was the leader.
	He's been retired.
	Yeah, he was the leader of the New World.
	Now he's just kind of retired and he's a grandpa and he cries on television and stuff.
	He does.
	Everybody does.
	What is this thing?
	Males crying constantly.
	I like Barbara Bush, though.
	You know, as my uncle said many times, the funniest woman in Washington is Barbara Bush.
	And I guess, I think maybe it was Jenna was interviewing Grandpa or something like that, and then he started crying, and she was crying, and Barbara Bush's signature said, hey, with that attitude, you can be Speaker of the House!
	She's funny, man.
	I do like that.
	Then we have, let's see, a lot of news in the high-speed rail department.
	All aboard, trains good, planes bad.
	So a little monkey wrench there as Florida rejects the Tampa to Orlando high-speed rail line.
	And there was an article in the Florida paper, and it was written by a journalist, supposedly, and it just berated the guy because, like, all this free money we can get from the government, he doesn't want it.
	You know, not realizing that the overhead, the maintenance of these high-speed rails is going to break any state that puts it in.
	I mean, there's no way that it makes any sense.
	And then, of course, the Washington Post...
	Had an unbelievably good op-ed slamming high-speed rail with all kinds of statistics and just the budgeting.
	And they had all these real solid facts.
	And it just went on and on.
	It was just like if you read this piece, you'd think high-speed rail is the biggest scam in history.
	Well, I think that Hill and Knowlton, who are the publicity firm for the High-Speed Rail Association, they probably got a phone call this past week.
	And they're going to have to step it up.
	Oh, yeah.
	There's going to be some good stuff coming up in the weeks ahead.
	Yeah, so just be on the lookout, everyone.
	Right, because you're absolutely right.
	That's exactly what happened.
	Yeah.
	And in a way, it works with the public relations companies, if you've ever worked with any of them or worked with people who have, is they start these projects and they got all the big shots...
	First they get all the big shots at the beginning of the project.
	We're going to be great.
	We're going to be there.
	We'll have our weekly meetings.
	We'll have teleconferences.
	And then after like, I'm sure it took a little longer in this case, but after like a month or two, they put the interns on it.
	Yeah, it's true, and they do it all the time.
	There's a junior associate.
	She's good, though.
	She doesn't know anything.
	No, no, no, she's really good.
	She's from Stanford.
	She's from Stanford.
	Interns from Stanford.
	No, no, no, she's good, yeah.
	So they're going to either get fired or they're going to have to up the ante and put their good people back on it.
	There's not that many people that can do this kind of work well.
	Well, they're definitely going to have to do something because you're right.
	I mean, there just is some media out there that's just saying, hey, wait a minute.
	And we've got some lawmakers, not just lawmakers, but some people who are running their towns and cities and states who are smart.
	I mean, China is just going all out, by the way.
	They want to create a rail system.
	This is so funny because we talked about this.
	China's crazy.
	They've already built about five cities that they don't even inhabit.
	I mean, they're just basically spending money on anything.
	Well, it's our money.
	So they've got to...
	China goes on the...
	I think we actually discussed this very thing.
	They're talking about the Panama Canal...
	Here it is.
	China is proposing to build a rail link to rival the almost century-old Panama Canal.
	The 220-kilometer rail connection would connect Cartagena.
	Sounds just like the Panama Canal.
	Help me through this, because I think they're throwing the Panama Canal in there as a joke, and it's irrelevant.
	Here it is.
	The 220 kilometers of rail would connect Cartagena on the northern Atlantic coast of Colombia with its Pacific coast, making it easier for China to export its goods through the Americas and import raw materials such as coal.
	China's got plenty of coal.
	So I'm not sure where this is coming from.
	We'll look into it.
	You know, but one thing's for sure, you're not building it for people to ride on.
	Which is exactly why this is being pushed here in the United States.
	We should revisit this on the next program.
	We should talk about it again because people are losing sight.
	If anything, we're losing sight of what the high-speed rail scam is about.
	And it's about moving goods, not about moving people.
	But it's being sold.
	Track beds and then handing them over at no cost to Burlington Northern and CSX and Southern.
	Right.
	To name three rails, I would love it.
	I put a couple of updates about Don't Ask, Don't Tell.
	A new memo came out.
	I just want to remind everybody that this is not repealed.
	If you are gay, please do not go whooping it up in the armed services, because you will get expelled.
	Memorandum for secretaries of the military departments.
	This came out on the 10th of February.
	The attached repeal implementation plan provided to the Secretary of Defense on February 4th, 2011...
	Provides the framework for the three areas of repeal implementation, policy, education, and training, and communication.
	That's four, by the way I count it.
	In the upcoming days, we will work together to solidify the format of progress updates, as well as the frequency of leadership meetings.
	Your first progress update will be due to me by March 1, 2011.
	So to remind everybody, the President did not repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell.
	He signed a bill that said...
	We will repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell if the following things take place, which means a complete certification by all of the armed services.
	And if you look at this memorandum, it's never going to happen.
	That's what we predict, of course.
	It's just never going to happen.
	And where are my gay brothers and sisters who are saying this is messed up?
	Yeah, it's a scam.
	Where are they?
	We're so vocal about everything.
	Where's the media?
	Where's the left wing that thinks this is the greatest thing in the world?
	Because they're not actually reading anything.
	And as a bi-curious male, I'm very upset about this.
	Should be.
	Okay.
	To wrap it up, a couple quick things.
	Many, many crazy stuff happening in the vaccine world.
	Flu vaccine is now able to be made faster.
	We've got some new techniques.
	They're going to get some more money.
	Gardasil, my favorite HPV vaccination, turns out, Stillbirth events much higher with those who have been vaccinated with the HPV vaccine.
	Let's keep the population down.
	It's working.
	This is exactly what it's for.
	And up there in Gitmo Nation, Great White North, it looks like the health system, this is not necessarily a vaccine, but it looks like the health system is going to be paying for Shantix.
	If you want to kick the nicotine habit, it looks like your government is going to give you the drugs, the Shantix, which is really good.
	That's another population reduction scheme because when you're on it, you want to kill people.
	Yeah.
	Good stuff.
	And then let's wind it up with some magic numbers.
	Some really good ones.
	Not necessarily message, but the middle class message.
	What do you think the average middle class earning is or the underclass now, John, in Gitmo Nation, United States?
	What is their annual take home?
	$33,000.
	$33,000.
	Hold on a second.
	Right on.
	It's the money.
	Very good, John.
	Amazing.
	Okay.
	Medicaid rate cuts in Texas, 33%.
	There you go.
	Makes sense.
	But here's the real message.
	Of course, we had all of a sudden, you know, we need to keep the price of crude oil up very, very high and screw everybody down line at the pumps and make all kinds of money in the middle.
	And we've got the Glencore going public, so everyone needs to make some dough.
	So we ratcheted up the pirate meme, which is a great one.
	Love them pirates.
	Go pirates!
	But the funniest one, which is a total message, this is definitely a message if you believe in the 33 coded message.
	Somali pirate gets 33 years in prison.
	Oh.
	Means he's not going anywhere.
	Not 30 years, not more than 30 years, not almost 40, no, 33 years.
	Dumb schmuck.
	And that is basically a message.
	All is well on the pirate front.
	We've got them going.
	Hee hee hee hee.
	What are you doing?
	Are you undressing?
	What's going on there?
	No, I was just over at the machine doing it.
	I have the machine away from this mic because of the internet connection.
	I have to go back and forth.
	That's why I've been pulling the mic out.
	Oh, okay.
	Got it.
	To get the Wi-Fi connection, which is what I'm on, actually.
	All right.
	I can't have the...
	And then they get the one plug.
	So I have to have the one plug over here.
	Don't ask.
	If I took a picture of this, you'd think I was a maniac.
	So, John, I know you've got to run.
	You're actually on your junket there.
	We really appreciate you Skyping in from your destination.
	Because you're always doing it.
	I'm not going to be outdone.
	Right.
	And it's a pain in the ass, isn't it?
	I mean, you feel weird.
	You're in a weird environment.
	You don't have all your stuff around you.
	Yeah, no.
	It's just not easy.
	No, you don't have your nail clippers or your pen clips to break.
	Right.
	I can't make the noises.
	Yeah, you don't have your slide whistle.
	But is that dedication, John?
	Is that dedication?
	And I hope people appreciate that and help us out because we need as much help as we can get.
	And that's what we need indeed.
	We need you to support us with any giving level that is possible.
	So that's a wrap.
	Yeah, I guess it is.
	When are you coming back?
	Are you back Sunday?
	Oh, no.
	I'm going to be doing the show Sunday from here, too.
	Oh, man.
	Sorry.
	I'll have more clips.
	No, no.
	It's okay.
	I'll pick up some Spanish news.
	I have...
	Yeah.
	Yeah, let's play some Spanish news.
	No, really.
	I'll tell you one thing I've seen.
	They're really soaking the EU, and I can see it.
	Oh, yeah.
	Anyway, we'll talk about that on Sunday.
	And Sunday, I'll play some of the Gonim clips.
	Who's that guy?
	Golem.
	The Google guy in Egypt?
	Yeah.
	Did you see his 60-minute interview?
	Yeah.
	What a joke.
	Hilarious.
	Hilarious.
	So we'll play some of that.
	And I'm sure there will be more news from around Gitmo Nation.
	Keep your eye out for the No Agenda News Network as we continue to expand that.
	Thanks everyone who's working on the show notes behind the scenes.
	Noagendashow.com is where you can find that.
	And John, be careful over there in Gitmo Nation.
	Cast the nets, you never know.
	Coming to you from Gitmo Nation West and the People's Republic of Southern California, worth less than $4.5 million at this point, I'm Adam Curry.
	And with no net worth that I know of, and here in No Agenda, Gitmo Nation, I'm sorry, Castanets will use it, I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We'll talk to you again on Sunday, right here on No Agenda.

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