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May 13, 2010 - No Agenda
02:16:46
199: Elephant In The Room
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Time Text
Who kills me?
Shameless, shameless, shameless.
Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
It's May 13, 2010.
Time for your Gitmo Nation Media assassination episode 199.
This is no agenda.
Party like it's not in butter.
Kill the morning.
Screw me with a...
What did you do?
Chainsaw.
Let's do it again.
All right.
Ready?
Yeah, hit it!
Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
It's May 13, 2010.
Time for your Gitmo Nation media assassination episode 199.
This is no agenda.
Partying like it's episode 199.
And coming to you from the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West in the People's Republic of Southern California.
In the morning, I'm Adam Curry.
And from northern Silicon Valley, where the sun is always shining, except when it's not, I'm John C. Dvorak.
In the morning.
In the morning.
In the morning to you and to everyone listening.
And to those at sea.
Who used to say that?
It used to be a common phrase in the old radio.
Yeah, to people from all lands and ships at sea.
This is the BBC News.
So, lots of news over the last few days.
Well, I wonder if you don't mind if I just do a little bit of...
Why would I mind that?
I think that's the best part of the show.
So, two episodes ago, I made a bold prediction on this program.
Regarding the next oil rig disaster, do you recall my bold prediction, John?
No, but I'm guessing it would have to be Venezuela.
I don't remember it personally.
Well, no, it was the Caribbean.
I said look for the next one in the Caribbean.
Oh, okay.
And if you read the news report properly, you would see that this Venezuelan Natural gas platform, which is now sunken into the Caribbean of Trinidad Tobago and Trinidad Tobago.
Oh, okay.
So let me just do it again.
We told you so.
How did I know it?
How did I know it?
Because it's a setup.
Chavez is now in on the game.
You know, I don't think that's true.
Let me tell you what I think.
Okay.
I think he may have been lured into the game because he's an idiot.
Okay.
I'll take that.
And the reason that he wants to be in the game is because essentially what Chavez gets to do here, he says, look, we had problems with our platform too, but nobody was killed and the thing didn't catch on fire and we got to cut it off the flow so nothing's leaking.
We're better than you are.
Well, everyone gets a Benny when they play along with the game.
I mean, he's not just going to do it for no reason.
So he gets to tell his people who have to listen to his crap on a day...
What's it, a weekly TV show he does?
Hourly basis, yeah.
You know, the Hugo Chavez show.
It's kind of like No Agenda, only on real TV. I'm sure he has a bigger audience than we do.
But not as smart an audience, obviously, or they wouldn't be watching it.
Or they wouldn't be telling me where the next oil cabal would strike, which of course was exactly right.
I didn't dream this up by myself, obviously.
So anyway, the...
We should do the Hugo Chavez show.
It'd be nice to get somebody to give us a clip, an audio clip of the intro to the show where they, you know, I'm sure it says, the Hugo Chavez show.
In the morning!
I like the clip of that.
Anyway, so this is part of the...
Albon Gas Company.
So I haven't even had time to research them.
But as predicted, in the Caribbean, because the whole thing is a setup, the idea is to spike the prices of oil and gas.
And we could talk a lot about that.
I have a really funny clip later from Geraldo.
Okay.
How some of this propaganda is running.
Well, before we get into that, let's go and thank our executive producers.
Okay.
We have more than one.
That's always good news.
We have two.
We have two executive producers and no associate executive producers.
And the curious thing, again, is that we have a random number aspect to this.
We have two people that pretty much donated back-to-back From two different parts of the world, the exact same amount of money.
Wow, okay.
So we have Matthew Greensmith from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia.
He also says, thanks for the great show, the closest...
Matthew Greensmith, you said?
Greensmith, yeah.
I can get this spreadsheet.
People put stuff in spreadsheets.
Unfortunately, you have to with this.
You don't like spreadsheets?
It did kind of revolutionize the personal computer industry.
I don't mind it revolutionizing it, but people I run into constantly send memos written on a spreadsheet.
Who does that?
Who do I know?
I just got one the other day somebody sent me.
It was like, here's the list of this, that, and the other thing.
It was all on a spreadsheet, so I had to boot Excel.
That's a gripe to me because on one of my machines it doesn't work right.
In the morning, John and Adam, thanks for the great show.
I think your show comes the closest I have seen to the model that will replace the nothing to see here that has taken over the news we used to have.
My donation is to support the continuation of that process.
Hope to see you in Gitmo down under soon.
Oh, and we have a D-word call out to Simon Elisha, who needs to recognize the value he's receiving and pay up!
Dooshbag!
See, for some reason, my spreadsheet is...
Oh, let me...
There's an idea.
So, of course, Matthew came in with the first of his three...
Is this the first of his three installments for his night?
I don't know.
But it's $333.33, which is a good number for us, and it's a lucky number for everybody.
And our other executive producer is Adam Miller, who is now Sir Adam Miller.
Well, not officially...
Well, he will be by the end of the show.
Yes.
He's got a small window of being just plain Adam Miller.
Just plain old Adam Miller.
A to the M. Nothing speciale.
From Perryville, Missouri.
Nice.
Who also gave us $333.33.
And these are both within like 10 minutes of each other.
Let's get a kick out of that.
This is awesome.
So those are our guys.
So even though we don't have an associate executive producer, we do have a PR associate for today.
And that might be?
Well, first let me mention a couple of initiatives that I like to do at the top of the show.
We have another kind of site that's out there.
It's not a cool domain name, but I did want to mention it.
Noagenda.status.net.
Of course, all of these are...
Put into the show notes at noagendashow.com.
Do we have a master list someplace of all these linked sites?
Well, all of them are in the show notes under links that rock on every single show.
Do we have the guy who did the...
I just got...
We have noagendanetwork.com, which is starting to really list all of the...
Okay, because we got the guy who does the floor mats.
I got my floor mat.
Actually sent two.
I think one is supposed to go to you.
Yeah, you think?
Damn you.
Damn you.
I want my floor mat.
I'm coming to San Francisco next week.
I'll give you your floor mat.
Yeah, I'll have to bring an extra big suitcase.
It's not a monster.
It's not a rug.
It's a floor mat.
It's not small, but you'll see it.
It's perfect for the kitchen.
It says No Agenda and In the Morning.
It's quite nice.
Perfect for the kitchen.
It's perfect for the kitchen, right?
Does it come in multiple colors?
No, it's black with the No Agenda logo and one of the many No Agenda logos and the In the Morning moniker.
Hey, would you mind tweeting?
Have you done that?
I already did.
Oh, good.
Okay, then we have another great initiative.
I actually installed this myself.
This is from Brent Mosley.
Adam and John, I just got done creating a No Agenda browser toolbar.
Now, normally, I hate toolbars.
I don't install them.
I find them to be malware, etc.
But he's created one which I'm just going to have to presume is safe.
I installed it, and so far, everything's still running.
The features include an easy, embedded No Agenda stream player.
Easy access to the Noagenda chatroom.
Compilation of the links that rock section, which is nice.
It's done in like a hierarchical drop-down menu so you can find all these sites.
Twitter reader, which follows No Agenda, Adam Curry, and The Real Dvorak.
A No Agenda RSS feed.
Embedded streaming of TV news from across Gitmo Nation.
One-click page translation.
A Google search bar.
Customized No Agenda Network search possibility on its way.
And a direct link to the donation page.
Not unimportant.
So I think that's cool.
That's more than cool.
Yeah, noagendatoolbar.rtoolbar.com.
This will also be in the show notes.
Don't you think that deserves an associate public relations thing?
Well, you know, we only have one PR associate per episode, and I haven't even gotten there yet.
So it's with commendation.
I mention with commendation.
Let's put it that way.
Then I can't ignore the fact that several people nominated you to be PR Associate of the Week for your work on This Week in Technology, Leo's Twitch show.
People thought you did an excellent job, particularly when Callie said, in the morning, and then you said, in the morning.
Yeah.
It was very funny.
Yeah, actually, we should have clipped that out.
Yeah, she said in the morning.
I said, in the morning?
Yeah, in the morning.
You did it again.
In the morning.
You did it again.
Now, as I tell people about the PR associate, I'm going to send you this picture.
I purposely held off on sending it to you because I wanted you to get the full effect of the surprise.
You know, one of the people who listens to the show is Pat Wilson from Weezer.
We've had an email with him back and forth.
Do you remember this?
Yeah, I'm waiting for the photo.
I haven't sent it yet.
Do you know the band Weezer, actually, John?
No, I don't.
I don't listen to bands anymore.
What do you listen to, then?
Classical music.
And bands don't perform that?
What is it?
It comes out of magical ether?
Those are orchestras.
Oh, okay.
I don't have anything handy.
Here, I do have something handy.
Hold on.
I'll play you a little bit of...
You'll say, oh yeah, those guys.
They've had some huge hits.
You're not going to send the photo?
I'm going to send the photo!
Alright.
Here's one of their many hits.
I'm playing this from the iTunes Music Store.
Yeah, yeah, I've heard these guys.
Okay.
Well, I am familiar with the band.
They're actually outstanding.
This is their big hit.
Right?
Yeah, they have a big sound.
It's a good sound.
I like the big sound.
So, Monday night on the George Lopez show, which I believe is on TNT? Or something.
Something like that.
They are performing on the show.
Also, so they taped this last night, and he sent me a picture.
Also on the show was Donald Trump.
And I just want you to see what they will be wearing.
I'm waiting for Accept, John, on the Skype file transfer.
There you go.
Look at what they will be wearing on the show, and people will freak out.
Of course, you're going to have to watch on Monday.
But I wanted to make Pat Wilson and Weezer the PR associate for No Agenda Episode 199.
I'm waiting for your reaction.
It's cute.
Cute?
It's awesome!
In the morning.
Should we tell the audience what...
Yeah, we have Trump.
The picture will be linked in the show notes.
Yeah, of course.
There's a guy in a bunny costume, another guy in a...
Well, it's the guys from Weezer.
Yes, the guys from Weezer.
It's a Weezer guitarist and a Trump and a lead singer in a bunny outfits with a crown or something.
I don't know what they're dressed.
With an in-the-morning sash.
I mean, it couldn't be any bigger...
Yeah, no, that's...
Come on.
So they're our official band now.
That's right.
We are the official band of No Agenda.
I love it.
All right, so we want to thank Matthew...
And Trump is looking like he's totally...
You know, I would ask, what does this mean?
Why am I here?
Why am I here?
This is the craziest picture because it makes Trump look like some sort of a...
He just doesn't get it, I guess.
I don't know.
Alright, we want to thank Matthew Greensmith and Adam Miller for being our executive producers for episode 199.
You know the drill by now.
You can put it on your resume.
You can put it in your email signature.
You might be able to get some IMDB credit, but definitely it is known in Hollywood circles to be a credit that means something.
Value for value.
So please let us know and let everyone know what the formula is.
Our formula is this.
We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
Okay, Weezer, sing along.
We'll be right back.
Shut up, Steve.
Chatroom's going nuts.
They want to see it.
So let's...
You want to send it to them?
Well, I can't send it to the chatroom.
I can put it on a link somewhere.
Don't get it.
Don't get it in the show.
Wait until the show notes come out.
So let's get right to the topic of interest.
I don't want to talk about anything but this right now.
Okay.
You spent like, I don't know, what were you complaining about?
How much money it takes to send stuff over?
And apparently you've got giant box of crap and it cost 80 bucks.
No, hold on a second.
No, Mickey had her stuff come in from Amsterdam.
She had to pay $1,800.
My shit comes in from London.
I paid $85,000.
Right, so somebody's scamming somebody.
Yeah, and my boxes weren't opened.
I know that because my LMG-99 Japanese light machine gun arrived fine.
My double-barrel shotgun arrived fine.
My ammo for the shotgun arrived fine.
So they didn't scam anything.
Wait a minute, you're smuggling arms?
Yes, absolutely.
I'm proud of it.
And nobody cares.
This is our...
I have a Japanese machine gun in my boxes and it's marked, labeled guitar, which is like the oldest trick in the book.
I should have put it's cello.
Yeah.
And I paid 85 bucks and it didn't open a single box, but oh yes, customs scanned it for you, for your convenience, sir.
Well, I'm sure they scanned it.
So let's go over this.
Give some background to the people out there.
You had moved your stuff from London and Mickey, who you're now living with, moved her stuff from Holland.
Yes.
And there seems to be a discrepancy in the way both systems were handled.
In other words, the London stuff came in...
No, both systems were handled the same way.
The rules state, Department of Homeland Security, is by law outsourcing the unloading and preparation for scanning of all goods shipped into the United States.
Okay.
So, they have a whole...
And these are published prices.
These prices were published in 2005.
It costs more for garments.
Apparently, it costs nothing for boxes containing weapons.
Machine guns.
Machine guns.
And, yeah, she wound up paying 8,500 bucks.
I'm sorry, $1,800.
And I paid $85.
You paid $85.
Why was her so expensive?
Was her box a thousand times bigger?
No.
No, her box, she had four times as much stuff.
So, in calculation...
At the wildest calculation, let's say it was a thousand because she had a lot of clothes.
But, you know, how hard is it to check clothes?
I mean, what do you mean?
You put thousands of kilos of heroin in clothes?
Hey, honey, your bras seem pretty puffy.
So, yeah.
How come you only want to talk about this?
Are you on some kind of thing?
No, I thought that you were complaining bitterly about what a scam this was going to be, and you knew you were going to get ripped off by the time your stuff came in.
You were worried sick about it.
Well, this shows you how big the scam actually is.
I think coming in at such a low number shows that this makes no sense.
Who's charging this?
I mean, it has something to do with the thing coming from Amsterdam versus London?
No, because...
Where does the bill come from?
Is it American companies?
Yes, we mentioned that last time.
There's only one company in Los Angeles that's doing that.
That's what I'm getting at, is why was yours so cheap?
I don't know.
I mean, you ask the shipping company, like, look, we can't really explain it to you.
This is the bill they give us, and we have to live by that.
It must be one of those things where they're just ripping off the women.
You know, like the car repair places.
Hey lady, your fraggle's broken.
It looks like you're going to need a new one and a new belt.
It could be.
But it's the truth.
And I just find it funny that I have a Japanese machine gun in there.
And I have ammo.
Yeah, the ammo is particularly disturbing.
I don't have ammo for the machine gun.
I'm still looking for a magazine.
And I think it's the 7.7mm ammo.
I'm sure someone out there can help me.
I'm sure it's like five bucks a bullet.
So anyway...
No, I understood that the thing came and looked like it was just a mess.
It wasn't very well organized in the box.
No, that was a different problem.
It was packed in London at my ex-wife's house.
And I think that here's how they did it.
Hey, that's his shit.
Throw that in that box.
Seriously.
That's the way it works.
The stuff arrived pretty mashed.
But the machine gun is safe.
Probably the most rugged thing you got.
What about your audio gear?
Yes, all of it's here, and this weekend I'll be setting it up.
I have some plug conversions to do, because they all have the UK, those crazy UK plugs, which are bigger than my head.
Yeah, those crazy UK plugs.
UK plugs have three big prongs, and there's a fuse in the plug, and a switch, yes.
Well, they don't want people getting killed.
I travel with 220, which a lot of people don't realize, and you have to be careful with around 220.
It's unlike 110.
With 110, you get a jolt and knock down your butt.
With 220, it just drops you.
You're dead.
I've always wondered why...
Why we have 110?
For safety reasons.
The United States early on decided that it was better to have 110 because it was safer.
Really?
And it would kill less people.
Because we have liability issues in the United States.
We're a legal country that does a lot of lawsuits.
The Europeans don't give a crap.
So they basically say, you know, the guy kills himself, he's an idiot.
So that's why they have 220.
It's just to summarize.
He's an idiot.
So, it's a difference between our kind of nanny state and their kind of nanny state.
Hey, do you have a pet peeve today?
Because I got something for you.
I probably do, but you know, these things kind of come up, they sneak up on me.
Alright, if it happens, I'll be on the ready.
Okay, I got a lot of stuff to talk about, but maybe I should let you go first.
Well, thanks!
I don't have the...
I can get it real quick.
I like Rajiv Rubaba and Big Brahmin in the morning!
Oh, that's a good one.
Yeah, it's good, isn't it?
That's from The Simpsons.
They're on board with the program.
What are you playing?
I don't know.
People send me the craziest stuff.
Well, good.
Keep sending them stuff.
Keep them busy.
So, let's talk about, well, we can talk, well, let's, here, let's run a humorous clip.
Betty White, it says Betty White on Saturday night.
This is the, was the big talk of everything last Saturday.
Yeah.
Oh, wait a minute, why don't we, I think, I think this qualifies, John.
And now, back to Real News.
And this is the reason, this is the reason everybody is all worked up.
Young woman, you get that fish out of my parlor.
What has gotten into you?
She's a lesbian.
Okay.
All right, which brings us to Kagan.
Ah, yes.
This is a very interesting story, and it has people talking, really.
I have the links, including the one you sent, listed under the Ministry of Truth.
Well, here's what's interesting to me.
Now, we're talking about the Supreme Court nominee, who was the elephant in the room when she was first...
Pun intended.
Pun intended.
When she was first nominated, nobody seemed to want to discuss the fact that she...
In fact, when we mentioned her on the last show, I had a number of Skype messages.
All the word was just lesbian.
Well, can I just say one thing that...
We mentioned her on two shows ago, and I said, hey, the White House has just announced that they don't think there's any problem with her being a shill for Goldman Sachs.
That, to me, is a little more important as to whether she's gay or not.
I agree.
But what I found interesting is that they didn't want to talk about her being gay, even though now they say, oh, that's all we talked about, which is bogus.
Because I have, I watched show, I hate doing this, but I watched show after show after show.
I watched right after a nomination, right after they started getting into it.
First I watched Olbermann, then I watched Matthews, and then I watched...
Who's the guy?
There's a couple more of these on the other...
Fox.
I watched O'Reilly.
I put these on the DVR so I could run through all of them.
O'Reilly and I watched...
I didn't see Beck, but I didn't miss anything.
Yeah, really.
But then I said, well, they're all ignoring the elephant in the room.
They're not going to talk about the fact that she appears to be gay.
We don't know if she is or not.
But she just carries herself like a gay woman.
And one of the shows showed pictures of when she was a college kid.
She was actually a cute little Jewish girl.
Mm-hmm.
That was actually very pretty, you know, in a cute little Jewish girl way.
But I could see her having boyfriends, but she was probably...
I get the sense that she's asexual more than anything.
Before you continue, Politico reported two days ago that all of her friends now, of course, they're not going by name, which I love.
It's great reporting.
Are all sending messages saying, hey, she's not gay.
She dated guys in college.
And even Elliot Spitzer.
Elliot Spitzer, that's the guy who has $5,000 night hookers.
Yeah, he's my hero.
So he's the guy that would know.
He says, I did not go out with her, but other guys did.
Yeah.
Well, Spitzer's actually an interesting character.
But anyway, so I get the sense that she's probably not gay, but she's not.
She's asexual.
She's a workaholic, and she's kind of given up, you know, because she doesn't look like a person who's, like, preoccupied with their looks.
Let's put it that way.
Yeah.
But meanwhile, but there's still, the issue exists and there's good reasons for it, and I think Andrew Sullivan discussed this the best.
He went on about, you know, and he was openly gay, and he says, you know, Obama wants everybody to be open and honest and do all this kind of thing, and now nobody wants to talk about this gay thing.
And he says it's important from a lot of different perspectives.
I mean, look what they did to Clarence Thomas when they, you know...
Oh, the Coke can thing?
Coke can.
Oh, yeah.
You big hair.
Who can verify any of that horrible woman?
I need a hill.
I need a hill.
Yeah, I need a hill.
So anyway.
Long dong silver.
Long dong's over.
You remember all the good ones.
Yeah, of course.
Yeah, that was awesome.
So I figure, of all people, the person that would most likely to bring this up, and I was waiting for my hero to come to the rescue, Rachel Madow.
Madow!
Oh, boy.
She says nothing, and instead we hear this ridiculous...
Let's see, where is it?
I got it on the clips.
I must...
No, it's not on a roll.
The elephant in the room.
Yeah, that's it.
Okay.
We'll just play a little Rachel.
And by the way, Rachel comes to her defense without ever saying why she's coming to her defense.
And let me set up one little thing.
One of the Republicans starts off this little clip by saying, well, the problem with this woman is she's got no judicial experience and she's got no litigation experience.
Which is true, right?
Which is true.
She's basically a bureaucrat.
Yeah.
And Rachel comes out and she twists it by saying, well, now the Republicans are saying she's had no judicial experience, and here's other people that have never had judicial experience.
And she goes on and on, but she's very specious with her arguments.
She, like, cheats.
She doesn't say anything about the no litigious experience either.
Rachel, she is...
As a host, and the way they talk about Beck and Limbaugh lying a lot, this woman is really probably the worst of the group because she just leaves stuff out in her arguments.
It strikes me that if a nominee does not have judicial experience, they should have substantial litigation experience.
Ms.
Kagan has neither.
Senate Republicans pouncing today on the fact that Elena Kagan has never served as a judge.
The last time someone who wasn't a judge was nominated to be a Supreme Court Justice was in 2005, when President Bush nominated White House Counsel Harriet Meyers to fill the seat of Justice Sandra Day O'Connor.
That nomination lasted all of 25 days, whereupon Mr.
Bush was forced to withdraw his pick for lack of political support.
The relevant comparison between Harriet Meyers and Elena Kagan is not actually about judicial questions about whether Elena Kagan is qualified for the Supreme Court.
Harriet Meyers had essentially been George Bush's lawyer and she'd been White House counsel for a hot minute and that's it.
Elena Kagan, on the other hand, is the current Solicitor General of the United States.
That's the person who argues the government's cases in front of the Supreme Court.
She is the former dean of Harvard Law School.
She is a former clerk to the Supreme Court.
She has a nationwide, coast-to-coast, sterling legal reputation.
She has been a longtime mainstay of Supreme Court speculation.
Can I just tell you that I find it very important Well, you're going to have a lot of problems with all those guys.
Now, let me go break down a couple of things she says in here.
First, she brings up the Harriet Meyers argument, which is a completely...
Yeah, of course.
He didn't pick her because she was his lawyer for a hot minute, by the way.
Obama's personal lawyer is now defending all kinds of stuff inside the administration.
Well, I'm not talking about that.
It's the fact that she says a hot minute, meaning that she just showed up.
But meanwhile, Kagan's only been Solicitor General since less than two years, and to the Obama, same thing.
But she...
But she completely ignores the fact that the reason Harriet Myers was dropped is because the conservatives got bent out of shape about, not about qualifications or anything in between, but it was about out-and-out cronyism.
Which, of course, she could have made a point about cronyism because, you know, Maddow is always looking to still score points against George Bush.
Yeah, like there's no cronyism in the Obama administration.
She completely ignores and now she's just pounding the drum for this woman, who I believe she thinks is a lesbian and she probably thinks it's a good idea to get her in there.
Yeah.
No, I think that something else is going on, Johnny.
Don't look over here!
Nothing to see here!
The things that I see, one is that she worked for Goldman Sachs, received money from them.
Which is never mentioned.
No, of course not.
This is why it's nothing to see here.
Talk about lesbianism!
The other one, and this is currently, I believe, in court.
Uh...
Monsanto was trying to overturn a 2007 California decision that imposed a nationwide injunction on planting the company's genetically modified alfalfa.
In March, Kagan's office, that's Solicitor General, interceded on Monsanto's behalf.
Oh, you got me on that one.
Good one.
Of course.
Of course.
You know, the way to...
For anybody who wants to do what we do on this show, deconstruct these news stories, one of the tricks you can use is you put in, and I didn't do this, I should have, Kagan Monsanto, Kagan Goldman Sachs, whoever it is, whoever you want.
Just those two, just start with those.
Monsanto, Goldman Sachs, just put Goldman Sachs and then put the person's name.
It's so funny you say that.
I do that all the time.
I also add United Nations and Council on Foreign Relations.
Those are the four, and there's your show prep.
There you go.
You're done.
I'm trying to do this without cheating.
It's not cheating.
It's totally cheating.
It's not cheating.
But you know, the funny thing is that this stuff goes on, and it never comes up in the conversation.
In fact, the Kurtz article I sent you, which is linked in the show notes in the Washington Post, It just goes on about, you know, quoting all the different people, they made a huge smoke screen about this lesbian thing, which seems to be off topic when it comes down to what's really important, which is she's a shill for Monsanto and Goldman Sachs.
Yeah.
I would challenge anyone to find me a clip from C-SPAN when they start grilling her.
That even comes up in the conversation.
It's funny you say that about C-SPAN because, well, first of all, I hate it when the programming executives put all the primetime shows on at the same time.
So, of course, you and I both know that everything that happens in Washington is one big show.
It's show business for ugly people.
And so I didn't know what to do.
We have C-SPAN 1, 2, and 3.
I don't know whether to watch the financial hearings about the flash crash, about all the oil executives that are blaming each other, or Kagan.
I mean, I'm confused.
There's not enough Adam to watch everything.
And I didn't record the clip, and I'm sorry I didn't.
C-SPAN is now editorializing, and it's starting to piss me off.
So first of all, why do I need to have C-SPAN 2 all day with BP, Halliburton, and Transocean executives?
Because all you see is a bunch of politicians who are all experts, and they're all talking about the blowout prevention and the dead man switch.
Well, shut up!
Do an investigation.
Don't take up my time with that.
But then you get the woman who comes on, sometimes a guy, but it's been a woman for the past couple of weeks, and says, now we'll go to the Senate hearing about the oil crisis in the Gulf.
This program lasts about three hours.
I know they always give you the estimated time.
But now she's editorializing.
And it went something like this.
We now switch over to the Senate hearings about the oil spill in the Gulf, where oil executives are pointing the finger at each other.
This program lasts about three hours.
And I didn't record it.
Oh, we've got to get one of those on there.
You can't get it on the C-SPAN archives, which are outstanding, but you can't get it because that's the editorialized in between.
It's just an interstitial announcement.
So why is she telling me that they were pointing the fingers at each other?
You know?
Oops.
We got a problem here, John.
Yeah, it's on your side.
Yeah.
You have a loose connection.
Maybe your battery's dead.
Two.
Check two.
That sounds like a dead battery on your mic.
Something else.
Oh, boy.
A little something.
Just start to replug everything in.
It's not that simple.
Hold on.
It's not that good.
Fail.
Let me just...
Colonel Panic.
Everything crashed hard, and of course when that happens, then the configurations get blown out.
And I can't...
Weren't we just talking about my new studio, John?
No, actually we were talking about Goldman Sachs, Kagan, and Monsanto.
We did talk about it earlier.
Anyway, I'm happy.
Hold on a second.
In the morning!
Let me just check that that's all recording.
Douchebag!
You're hearing all that, right?
Oh yeah, sounds good.
Okay, hold on.
Let me double check this.
In the morning.
So are we, is this where we, so why don't you explain what happened?
And then I can do when I told you so, and then we can get back to this show.
Oh.
Ha ha ha ha.
Okay.
What happened was, we were talking...
And then all of a sudden, I got a kernel panic.
I could hear, that's the Mac equivalent of blue screen of death.
And everything started to freeze.
I couldn't unfreeze it.
I tried to dump out of the Ableton Live so that I could save.
Because it should be saving directly to hard disk, but whatever happened in this instance, it didn't leave anything.
And so I had to reboot.
So we did a half a show, 40 minutes of a show.
No, I think we did 30 minutes.
No, it was 40.
Really?
Yeah.
You sure?
Yeah, because I made a note at the time so we could calculate when we're going to do some other things.
Okay, so we have 20 left for this half.
Okay.
So, anyway, the good news is I think Nerdy Dude recorded the stream.
Note his moniker.
Nerdy Dude.
Our hero.
Yes.
And so that's already being uploaded to a server so I can stitch it all together for the podcast, which most of the people listen to.
Although you stream at 32K or something.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
We're streaming at 64K. We dropped everything, and in case you hadn't noticed, the quality of the show is now at 96 these days.
I've gotten no complaints.
Yeah, well, it's a better sounding show at 96, obviously.
So, okay, well, then we do have the first half of the show, so we don't have to worry about that.
Good.
Although we know that a number of people back up the show for us in the cloud.
Yes.
Our version of the cloud, which are individuals sitting in their rooms here and there around the country.
Yeah, hopefully they're at work.
Enjoying the show.
Hopefully they're at work.
Yeah, I know your theory, but they should be at work recording.
Yes, that's why you should be doing that.
Okay.
All right, so I guess we were talking about Kagan, and have we kind of wrapped up that topic on Kagan?
I think so.
I think we mentioned the fact that we're on, at least we mentioned...
The fact that if people just Google people's names with the words either Monsanto or Goldman Sachs, you find out that they're all connected.
Oh, that's what it was.
We were talking about that and then all of a sudden, boom, they shoot a magic bullet through the line and they nuke my system.
Yeah, that's what they did.
So...
But the point is that this is another example.
Now we have essentially East Coast elitists.
I don't think there's anybody not in the Ivy League that is on the court.
So nobody represents the public.
And to make matters worse, they're all stooges for Monsanto.
This will come up in the conversation when there's a court case and the judges all fined for the big corporation.
So why don't we do something a little light just to get back into the swing of things.
Light?
Yeah, something light.
I have some clips from a television show which are propagating an agenda, an old one, and a new one.
I'm listening.
Okay, so you're familiar with the program Supernatural?
I don't know.
I may have watched it once.
I think it's a crappy show.
So yeah, I guess I do.
I'm familiar somewhat.
Okay, so first of all, they like to propagate some memes, so let's make sure we get them in there.
Can we commit our act of domestic terrorism already?
Let's go.
And so what is that act of domestic terrorism?
Well, we're going to throw a couple of memes at you.
And listen very closely because this is something you're going to be hearing a lot more about.
Something you need to say.
Neveus Pharmaceuticals rushing delivery of its new swine flu vaccine to, quote, stem the tide of the unprecedented outbreak.
Shipments leave Wednesday.
Niveus Pharmaceuticals.
Get it?
You two are lucky you have your looks.
Your demon lover, Brady.
The VP of distribution, Niveus.
Ah, yes.
That sound of the abacus clacking?
You all caught up?
So pestilence was spreading swine flu.
It was not just for giggles.
That was step one.
Step two was the vaccine.
And you think...
I know.
I'll stake my reputation.
That vaccine is chock full of grade A farm fresh Croatoan virus.
Simultaneous countrywide distribution.
It's quite a plan.
You don't get to be horsemen for nothing.
So you boys better stock up on, well, everything.
This time next Thursday, we'll all be living in Zombieland.
Okay, so you didn't see the show, so let me tell you the premise.
Before you say anything more, you watched this crap?
No, someone sent it to me.
Oh, okay.
The premise is, swine flu, vaccine, but this vaccine turns everyone into zombies.
And just look around at the slate of television shows and movies that are coming out.
It's all zombies, John.
The zombie craze is over.
No, no, no, no, no.
It's going to get a lot worse.
Look at all the upfronts.
We're going to see a lot of zombie stuff.
And I always feel with some of this mainstream media stuff that kind of like giving us a little message like, you're all going to be turned into zombies.
You watch.
It's a new meme, zombies.
It's going to be much bigger than it was.
Okay, I'm not buying it.
Okay.
The reason why is because the zombie thing has come and gone.
Well, I may be a little bit more in the media than you.
You might be wrong.
Speaking of being wrong, we talked about the flash crash.
A lot of people have been doing research, sending in stuff, some anonymous, including this next message.
We talked about the Russian programmer who would be related to Sergei Alenikov.
That's the guy who took the code and got arrested at Newark Airport and went to Chicago.
This, of course, is my theory entirely, but based upon conversations with insiders.
And I took that code into the computer room, compiled it, ran it for a couple seconds, brought down the entire market, down 1,000 points, and it was just a little beta test.
And you said, well, you know, it's like doing this, you've got to compile the code.
I just want to give you a little bit of extra info.
The language that these guys program this stuff in is Erlang.
Are you familiar with Erlang?
No.
Erlang.org.
I'm reading verbatim from an email from an anonymous donor of information.
Erlang has many properties that make it an excellent choice for building highly concurrent servers, one of which is the ability to recompile and reload code while it is operating.
Under certain circumstances, the Erlang VM will even execute both old and new code revisions of a code base simultaneously.
So very plausible the new code was loaded even while trades were being processed.
I can believe that.
So I'm really sticking with this.
So it's running on a virtual machine, so you can probably...
It'd be very powerful.
I'll look into the Erlang language.
Yeah, I'd never heard of it before, but Erlang.org...
There's a lot of these really weird little languages that are specialty languages used for one thing or another.
I wasn't arguing with the fact that I think something was...
I'm totally in on the concept that somebody ran some beta code just to see what would happen and then rocket it away, saying, whoops.
And I don't know if they meant to crash the market.
I'm sure they...
I think it may have been just...
Just a test.
Yeah, what would happen?
What's going to happen?
Hey, man, let's run this virus, see what it does.
I will say that the SEC is extremely disappointing.
First of all, what's her name, the SEC chief?
The one that used to be with the other agency that she moved over to the SEC. The one that ignored Madoff and they replaced it with the other woman that ignored Madoff.
That one?
Mary Shapiro.
That one.
So she calls all of the exchange chiefs to Washington.
Is she a computer expert?
Oh, yes.
Well, they're all experts in everything.
Blowout preventers, computer code, Erlang.
She looks like she's an Erlang hacker.
So, of course not.
So, instead of actually getting to the bottom of this, which they can't, because there's like 250 different exchanges they have to look at, and they're like, well, you know, it's going to take forever.
The fact of the matter is they need some real hackers, and it's going to take six months to figure this out.
I think six months you couldn't even do it.
Maybe.
It might take years.
But whatever.
Play my stock market crash clip, which is what we're hearing now.
This is what it's deteriorated into, which is a bunch of lame excuses and we don't know this, we don't know that, and maybe it was this, maybe it was that.
I think we're concluding this and we're concluding that.
Now, SEC Chairman Mary Shapiro and CFTC boss Gary Gensler are answering from lawmakers on the Capital Markets Subcommittee about that thousand-point market flash last week.
Basically, both of them saying that their collective staffs are working around the clock, along with the participants from the key exchanges, to find out what actually caused that thousand-point drop last week.
We will get to the bottom of this.
I think we will be able to determine what the initial triggers were.
That's going to take time.
There's 66 million trades on May 6th, covering 19 and a half billion shares of stock.
Now, collectively, Shapiro and Gensler are telling lawmakers so far they have ruled out the so-called notion of a fat finger trade.
They say they've had no evidence of prior securities trading out of the extraordinary, shall we say.
No evidence of a terrorist-type cybersecurity attempt at hacking, if you will.
And CFTC Chair Gary Gensler, in particular, is honing in on the notion that it really was a confluence of events.
Our own review of trading data shows that somewhere starting around 240, some of the most actively traded participants in the futures market, some of these high-frequency traders, started to limit their participation around 242, 243, and so forth.
Yeah.
They don't know.
They don't know, but the limit to participation is where it's headed now.
First of all, the guy says it was a confluence, which means it was a coincidence.
Oh.
Then it follows up with this idea, and this is the one I think that's getting the most traction, which is, well, you know, these guys, the high-frequency trader guys, decided to turn off their program for some unknown reason.
Yeah, they were recompiling code.
And not participate, and essentially, because the high-frequency trading is so dominant, apparently everybody does, it's not just Goldman, that...
It's propping up the market.
So once they pull it...
Yeah, that's actually not a bad theory.
Yeah, no, it's propping up the market.
It's just buying and selling and making things look real active, and then they shut the thing down for a minute, and the market just collapses because there's no support.
What it's really saying is that the market is...
I would be really afraid if I was an investor with this one thought that they're starting to propagate, which is that if it wasn't for the high-frequency trading, this market would be down at 6,000.
Well, so let me ask you a question, because I find the timing of this very interesting.
This happened just days before the announcement of the now, what is it, almost a trillion dollar, quote, bailout of the European Union, the Eurozone, which many financial experts are now saying is probably one-tenth of what will actually be needed.
Now, the way I see this...
Yeah, well, I'm thinking one-tenth, too.
Oh, wow, we agree.
So, the way I'm seeing this is people don't really understand what is going on with this bailout.
I mean, it's not like we're giving money to governments and like, oh, thank you, we needed that money.
They have to pay off these loans.
And if I'm not incorrect, these loans are from huge banks like Citibank and Goldman Sachs and there's derivatives trades and it's all kinds of complex stuff.
But it's really going back to bankers, people who lent these countries the money.
Is that a correct assumption?
Well, you're going to have to say it again.
Okay.
So, I see that Citibank comes out and says, well, we do have an exposure to Greece.
It was $1.7 billion or something like that.
So, the exposure is Greece borrowed money.
And they have to pay that back because these bonds are now maturing and it's time to pay back the loan.
Right.
Right.
So, but these loans are going to banks.
So this money that Greece is receiving is going to banks.
It's kind of like, I think Horowitz said it right.
It's kind of like we had a credit card.
It's full.
It gets cut up.
And now we get a new credit card.
But, you know, we still have all this debt hanging out there.
And it's a never-ending story.
But it is ultimately to the holder of the credit card, which I believe are pretty much banks.
The money's coming from somewhere.
So it's banks that are lending this money.
There may be some sovereign funds, like the Chinese, but that's still a bank.
It's basically banks.
So, is it thinkable, or within the realm of possibility, that the banks are like, hey, you know, you guys better get your crap together.
You better, like, show us the money.
And if not, we're going to crash everything.
Watch this.
Flip the switch for two seconds.
No.
Well, I mean, from my perspective, it's no, because the banks would be more screwed than anyone.
Will they really?
Because they'll just get a bailout from...
I mean, if you think it was just like a salvo said to scare them and then really never do something like that.
But if they crash the whole system, the banks, they might as well just close up shop.
They'll never get any money from anybody.
I mean, no, I don't think so.
It just doesn't make sense to me.
I think that this stock market thing was either an accident or a beta test or something, or it could have been a number, but it's something that corrected itself rather quickly, and it looked like a switch kind of a thing.
I mean, it did have an on and off switch quality to it, and...
I don't know.
I think it's more nefarious than just a bunch of bankers.
Either more nefarious or more frightening or just accidental.
I don't know.
I just find the whole thing disturbing and it's not...
I don't think it's being really looked at from the perspective of...
There's a lot of implications that are just not being discussed.
Well, so I just want...
Yeah.
And I think it was two days before.
Most of these things happen, like, right on, you know, like, you know, it's more interesting, your argument that Goldman, you know, got this, you know, indicted and fined, and then it happened.
No, that was not my argument at all.
I don't think that was my argument.
No.
No, no, they just want to make money at the end of the day.
And they all want to make money.
You can make a lot of money on the short side, by the way.
No kidding.
If it goes that fast.
But if we look at the United States of Europe with this bailout, I really feel that we're headed towards war.
Well, isn't that the theory of our show since the beginning?
Yeah, I mean, it really seems like...
It's crazy.
I was reading some Gitmo Nation Lowlands articles.
Actually, it's an English book, and I had to read it on a Dutch website.
It is...
This is Free Fall, written by Nobel Prize winner Joseph Stiglitz.
And this is about Iceland.
So this is kind of what started things off in Europe.
Iceland, of course, was the first country to really be taken down through no fault of the people.
No agenda bookstore, make note.
Yes.
So here is an interesting passage from the book.
Iceland's banks had, like banks elsewhere, taken on high leverage and high risks.
When financial markets realized the risk and started pulling money out, these banks, and especially Landsbanki, now this is, you had the Ice Saver accounts, which British citizens and Dutch citizens invested in through the internet, right?
Right.
Great.
These banks lured money from depositors in the UK and the Netherlands by offering them ice saver accounts with high returns.
The depositors foolishly thought there was a free lunch.
They could get higher returns without risk.
Perhaps also foolishly thought their own governments were doing their regulatory job.
Because it turns out, and this is 2008, So, the finance ministers, I guess that would be the exchequer in the United Kingdom and the minister of finance in the Netherlands, which I guess would be Wouter Bosz.
They should have known or they should have done some, what do you call it, due diligence before allowing this cross-border trade and this investment through the internet.
Essentially what these banks were doing was saying, hey, you know what, we're in trouble here.
We're going to need some money.
What do we do?
Oh yeah, let's get those saps from over there.
We'll have them invest and we'll take their money.
They literally took their money.
And the finance ministers should have at least known this.
And this was 2008, way before there was any sign of a problem in the public eye.
And it just seems like it's all done with intent.
And then, of course, the UK and the Netherlands pay their citizens.
They say, oh, okay, we'll front the bill.
And then they go and they screw Iceland.
I don't know.
You got me on this one.
At worst, you probably don't care.
Anyway...
There's an element to that.
Well, this, of course, has nothing to do with finances.
This is all about control.
The euro is a government project about world government and not about...
Money, although of course money controls it all.
Brussels, dateline yesterday, Europe announced radical plans Wednesday to pre-vet member states' budgets from the next year, drawing decidedly mixed reactions from Eurogiants Germany and France.
So the idea here is, we have to look at your accounting.
We've got to see what your budgets are, and we're going to determine from Brussels, from Starfleet Command, we're going to determine what you can do.
Yeah.
This is control.
This is total control.
I agree with that.
Everything's about control.
The thing that still gets me, and I don't know how long this can continue, is that when you start looking at the nexus of power in the EU, it always crops up as Germany and France.
They're the biggest.
They're the biggest by population.
They're the biggest and they seem to be both dominant.
They're both type A personality countries in this regard.
How long is that partnership going to last?
It's never lasted.
Throughout history, it's never lasted.
The basic personality types of those two countries is extremely incompatible.
Would you disagree with that?
No, I totally agree.
And of course, the French and the Brits are always ragging on each other all the time.
They have a love-hate relationship like a couple of brothers.
They love the French wine and cheese and hate everything else.
I mean, that's not a real love-hate relationship.
Well, that's true, but I think it's less of a genuine personality conflict.
I mean, I think the personality conflict between England and France never seems...
I mean, it's interesting, but it's not to the extreme of core personalities insofar as the differences are concerned between the French and the Germans.
I think there's a core difference between the way they're raised, the way they think, the way they operate, everything about them.
The French and the English is kind of laughable because they've, you know...
It's just different.
I don't see it as a...
The wars between those two countries ended hundreds and hundreds of years ago.
The French and the Germans have been battling for the last 200.
And they still are, as far as I can tell.
Is there something wrong with that analysis, you think?
No, I think that's a good point.
I just wonder if it's going to be by proxy.
So now we know France is actually attacking Britain.
Yeah, with the British.
Now, Cameron...
Okay, here's an interesting thing.
I think I have a clip of this.
Cameron's problem?
Yeah, why don't we play that and then we can go into it.
The fact is, you know, this is something Americans don't fully understand because we've been taught in school, and I can assure you we've been taught in school, that England is a constitutional monarchy and the monarchy itself is a figurehead position that has no meaning.
That's what Americans generally think.
That's not what I think.
I know.
Obviously, if you play this clip...
All right.
I'm just saying, if her name is on the dotted line, she may be a figurehead, but her name is on the dotted line.
Over to Simon Hobbs.
It's certainly been a big day for the British government.
We want to get a look at sort of the wrap-up of everything that's been happening there and talk a little bit more about how it's going to affect the currency market.
Simon, if you would, just recap the day's events.
Well, effectively, 13 years of Labour Party rule, Trish, in the United Kingdom, have come to an end under Tony Blair, and more latterly, of course, the man who was his finance minister, Gordon Brown.
We had an election last Thursday after five days.
Finally today, Gordon Brown resigned as Prime Minister because that election of the three parties gave none of them a majority, and he couldn't do a deal with the third party in order to gain office.
There you see him walking out of Downing Street to go and ask the Queen if he could move on.
In life, she then asked David Cameron, who is the head of the Conservative Party, if he would kindly form a government.
He is now therefore the Prime Minister, and indeed we believe, or it's apparent, that he is going to rule in a coalition with the third party, the Liberal Democrats.
The scale of Cameron's task, and this is what the markets are focused on, Trish, is absolutely enormous.
Outside Downing Street, as you see him there, he spoke about confronting problems, facing up to challenges.
And front and centre of those challenges are the British deficit.
This year, expected to be $250 billion.
That's 12.8% of GDP.
Far more severe than you have here in the United States.
And the expectation, the demand from the Treasury, is that he has cuts or tax rises equal to 5% of GDP.
$105 billion.
We have an emergency budget which he will go ahead with within 50 days.
That is the promise.
The question for the markets is exactly how we'll steer that will be.
We know he'd like $9 billion of spending cuts.
The Liberal Democrats are working in the...
Right.
It ended there.
Yeah, sorry.
Because it goes on forever.
But the point he ends up making is that the Tories may be forever screwed because of what they have to do.
But at the beginning of the clip was the interesting part, which is the Queen...
You know, Gordon Brown went there begging that he could leave, and she said yes, and then she, as we said weeks and weeks and weeks ago on the show, that, you know, Cameron was obviously on the fast track to become the next Prime Minister.
Oh yeah, it's time for him to take the baton and run with it.
But the fact that the Queen had to get into the news cycle and tell him, you know, that here's what's what, you're going to be the Prime Minister, and then you're going to work with these other guys, and you're going to have to fix this problem.
Yeah.
Really kind of takes away the idea that the Queen's a figurehead.
Well, you know what?
It's a good backstop.
Because in case the elites don't get what they want, then she can always just step in and say, here's how we're going to do it.
A couple other interesting things I noticed about this coalition, which is the first one in 30 years.
If 55% of the coalition government does not agree on an issue, then they disband.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, well, I mean, and of course, you know, I love it how I get email from people saying, you don't understand how our government works.
Well, maybe it's just interesting to listen to how American, that looks great, honey.
Maybe it's just interesting to learn how Americans think about it.
But I did live there and I do think that I have some knowledge of what's going on.
So this is how a cabinet falls.
So 55% doesn't seem like a lot.
It seems like things could be kind of worked out, particularly when you note that in this new cabinet, listen to the bankers who are now members of parliament.
Mark Garnier, emerging market specialist.
Joe Johnson, brother of London Mayor Boris Johnson, who worked at Deutsche Bank.
Jacob Rees-Mogg, formerly of Rothschild and Lord George Management.
Investment management expertise boosted by the arrival of Richard Graham, former head of international business of bearings asset management, also founder of the British Chamber of Commerce in Shanghai.
by And then we have Matthew Hancock, who was George Osborne's chief of staff and brains behind the conservatory economic policies.
He was co-author of the Arculus Report on red tape and regulation commissioned by the Tories.
Mark Reckless, economist for Barings and Warburg Bank.
There's a lot of bankers in there.
Don't you think it's interesting how the bankers are taking over the world of politics when it used to be the lawyers?
Well, it's a much easier way to control people through their money.
The law stuff is complicated, takes a lot of time to write.
Here it's just like, shut up, slave, I'm going to take your money.
It's like, okay, what do you want me to do?
One other interesting little ditty in the coalition document, which I read, which of course is interesting because these two parties, the Liberal Democrats and the Conservatives, have very different views on a number of issues.
On most things.
One of the big ones seems to be a change in the way voting will happen, which will include a referendum.
That's actually one of the longest pieces of the document.
There's some banking reform, immigration, political reform.
The funniest one, though, is out of nowhere, we're going to implement high-speed rail!
It's right there in the coalition agreement.
Really?
Yeah.
Listen to this.
I love this.
The establishment of a high-speed rail network.
So it's not just we're going to talk about it.
We're going to do it.
The cancellation of the third runway at Heathrow.
Planes bad.
Train's good.
Wow.
The refusal of additional runways at Gatwick and Stansted.
And the replacement of the air passenger duty with a per-flight duty.
So, uh...
No, wait.
Let's go over that again.
We're grounded.
The establishment of a high-speed rail network...
No, no, no, no.
The last part about the duty...
Oh, the replacement of the air passenger duty, the tax, with a per-flight tax.
So now it's like...
What does that mean?
Oh, that means it's easier for guys to keep planes on the ground because there's extra taxes if it actually flies.
And I believe that the airlines have to charge that if they don't already.
It's a tricky one.
Well, there's definitely a movement to...
I think this is a nice find, by the way.
Thank you.
Well, it's just reading.
It's not that hard.
The BBC publishes this.
By the way, mandating a national recharging network for electric and plug-in hybrid vehicles.
Mandating, mind you.
A mandate for power outlets on the highway.
You know how long it takes to recharge a battery-operated car?
What are you going to do, park it there for 12 hours and take it?
I mean, maybe in one of these things where you just sleep all night.
I still think it takes longer to prep this show than it does to charge a car.
Just one funny little bit.
By the way, you know how long it takes to charge an iPad?
Not that long, actually.
Five minutes.
Yeah.
Well, it was a little more than five.
No, no.
Five minutes.
Because I went to the store the other day and I gave them the American Express card.
It took five minutes.
Bada boom.
Wait.
I have a...
It was a tech grouch joke, by the way.
I like that.
So remember the crazy lady who was yelling at the protester?
Although you kind of blew the joke.
Just mentioning it.
I didn't know it was a joke.
I'm just saying.
I'm a horrible straight man.
Kay Burley is that crazy woman who was yelling, the Sky News woman who was yelling at the contestant.
Oh, that horrible person.
Yeah.
So, this is really funny.
She's going to get sued.
Good.
So apparently she doesn't do just political stuff, but she also was covering Naomi Campbell.
And so there's a whole bunch of photographers and everybody out there trying to get a shot of Naomi Campbell.
And some photographer bumps his lens into her cheek.
And by the way, she's an elitist.
She's at Royal Ascot with her big hat on and everything.
Oh, lovely.
So she gets pissed off.
She grabs the photographer by the throat and chokes her.
And then later she says...
She says, I didn't put my hands on anyone.
I was provoked.
Well, I might have put my hands on someone.
I put my hands up.
I didn't choke anybody.
And then there's...
Great pictures of her literally with a hand around this poor photographer's throat choking her.
There's a picture of her neck.
It's completely scarred with the choke marks.
This woman is a horrible, horrible elitist person.
She's terrible.
She's so naive not to notice that everyone's taking her picture.
Everyone's taking pictures?
What an idiot.
Yeah, it's funny.
It's in the show notes.
Well, hopefully she gets fired.
Yeah, it's in the show notes that Noah's in the show notes.
No, she's not going to get fired.
She's perfect.
So anyway, let's get back to this other point, which is the...
I haven't heard a more obvious rails good, airplanes bad example than that one because they want you to know we're not going to put the extra runways up.
No, we're not going to do that.
But yes, we're going to do high-speed rail, which...
I don't know.
I mean, Britain is...
I mean, what do they need high-speed rail for there?
Where are you going to go?
The trains are already such a success and they're so affordable.
They took the toilets out to make room.
So I say long on adult diapers.
It's crazy.
So, okay, we got an email from somebody in Australia discussing, out of the blue, this guy sent us a note saying that, well, I thought you guys are full of crap, and I don't know what this high-speed rail thing is.
And then he says, all of a sudden, apparently, passed with no discussion, was like a billion dollars for high-speed rail in Australia, which he says...
It's extremely ludicrous because there's a huge distance between all the towns, and if you wanted to go to Perth on a high-speed rail, no matter how fast it went, it would still take you days.
Well, I've taken that Trans-Australia line.
It's 24 hours from Melbourne to Perth.
And that doesn't go very fast.
So it would go faster than that, I think.
How far is Melbourne to Perth?
It's about 24 hours by train.
Yeah, but how...
I don't know.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
I don't know.
It's a famous railway.
It's the India-Pacific railway.
Yeah, I know.
I've heard of it.
It's one you want to take.
But anyway, it seems to me that...
I don't know.
This whole high-speed rail thing is getting on my nerves.
Well, there's two other things.
Actually, three other things.
Somebody also did some calculations on whatever the difference is to make the high-speed rail line, unless it is an express line, it has to stop all the time.
So the momentum, you know, it goes up to 200 miles an hour or 300, let's hope, and it has to slow to nothing and stop dead.
I mean, so your average speed is going to be next to nothing.
Somebody talked to me about apparently some Japanese technology.
No one's implemented this yet.
I have it in the show notes, the animation of it.
Of the top car being dropped off?
Yeah, it's like they just unhook it.
Like, hey, I'm unhooking, get out.
And so it does slow down a little bit, but doesn't stop.
And then it basically roars past the station.
So everyone has to move into the drop-off car like sheep.
Everybody's like a mailbag.
Yeah.
With a hook.
It's just like, hook, I'm on the hook.
And then it'll pick up the people who are waiting in a car that, you know, that is at that station.
And so it never really stops.
But, I mean, this is not implemented yet.
And it's never going to be.
But, because it's too crazy.
But, I think it would be funny to have a system like that because you can imagine, you know, like...
You're on a train trip to your marriage, and you say, hey, honey, I've got to go to the bathroom.
I'll be right back.
And you just sneak up into that top car.
Into the drop-off car.
Boom, the train is on its way, and you're like back behind the line.
So two things I wanted to mention.
There's something we have to be on the lookout for.
Showing up everywhere in, I'll just say, real news sites are anti-plane stories, and I have two of them.
One from Gitmo Nation Lowlands and one from the National Journal, which is, is that U.S.? It's either U.S. or Great Britain, I think.
Yeah, it's U.S. I think it's U.S. Okay.
And so they'll have a story.
No, I'm sorry, this is UK. They'll have a story.
Is the three-hour tarmac delay rule good for travelers?
And it's Lisa Caruso writes in the National Journal, blah, blah, blah, harsh penalties for US airlines, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And then the whole page is filled with banners for Norfolk Southern Transportation.
Yeah, for the railway.
And then there's one from the Netherlands on newsout.com.
And by the way, these are not rotating banners.
These are set banners that do not rotate.
I captured them first in PDF, then I refreshed, refreshed the next day.
So, top story...
The ash cloud, I'm translating on the fly, the ash cloud from the Iceland volcano is still disrupting air traffic in the north of Europe.
Here's the latest news and the most recent predictions for closures and right underneath it, high speed.
The Fast and Always Trustworthy Alternative Travel by Train.
In the middle of the page!
Right underneath the story.
But why would they be promoting it on the continent?
Because they already have it.
No, no, no.
The Netherlands...
Oh, the high-speed train story in the Netherlands is a two-decade-old story.
They started this...
Of course, all of this started a long time ago.
They...
Flattened villages, houses, everything for this gutter, which is going to have this high-speed train.
And the gutter's been there for a decade, but the train is still not running.
No, this has been a multi-billion dollar fiasco.
What difference does it make in Holland if you have high-speed rail or not?
If you get on a slow train, you're out of the country in about 14 minutes.
Well, I've been thinking about it.
And the only thing I could come up with is with air travel, you don't control anything except the takeoff and the landing.
Yeah, I mean, sure, there's control over where you fly, etc.
But you can't tax someone for going over land.
You can't, you know, there's no infrastructure in the sky.
It's just a money grab.
If we can move the people on the earth, then we can make a lot more money off of them.
That's the only thing I can see.
I don't know.
I still think it's about freight.
I mean, Norfolk Southern or whatever you're talking about, that other operation, that's not a company that's ever going to carry passengers.
That's a pure freight company.
Is it?
Yeah.
I'm not familiar with them.
It's a freight company.
I mean, Burlington Northern is a freight company.
The only people doing passenger traffic in the U.S. because everybody else said this is a loser is Amtrak.
And they contract with a few of the rails for their right of ways, but Norfolk Southern is never going to go into the passenger business in a million years.
I'm clicking on the banner.
Oh, this is funny.
Thefutureneedsus.com.
Oh, that's great.
You see a road with cars, and it's all smoky, and then it's dusty, and then it goes to...
Smoky old cars.
Yeah, go to thefutureneedsus.com, and then it goes to a freight train.
So first you see cars with two trucks, and then whoop, freight train.
Amazing.
The future needs us.
It needs green jobs, a competitive economy, clear roads, clean air.
You know what?
I think anyone out there who has friends in the Teamsters Union, the Teamsters should be on this, because this is a direct attack on the infrastructure of trucking in this country, which is extreme.
Not just this country, every country, John.
In every country, but we are very truck-oriented.
Yeah.
More so than Europe.
Yes.
So, I would say that something's up.
We know something's up, it's just, you know.
Well, of course, the big news, and as Rahm Emanuel said, never let a good crisis go to waste, is John Kerry introduced the new version of the cap-and-trade bill yesterday.
Oh, another version of the cap-and-trade scam.
Yes.
Did you see, by the way, did you see the fact that now Science Magazine finally revealed the fact, it's on the blog, by the way, dvorak.org slash blog, that that polar bear picture was totally photoshopped.
It was a complete scam.
Yeah, it's in the show notes.
Nobody, of course, will mention this.
You know, Carrie or anybody else, as they try to plow this cap-and-trade scam, out-and-out scam, you know, and all the pro-global warmists are all going, oh, well, you know, you can't take a chance.
You know, we're just trying to, you know, yeah, okay, we used a bad photo, but, you know, it still was a good idea is right.
Not only that, but they also used another picture of a house underwater saying this was because of global warming.
Flooding was happening everywhere.
And they got that off of stockphoto.com or iStockphoto.com.
And it says literally right there, it says this is computer generated.
So a couple of things, and then we should get into our thanking some of our supporters today.
So first of all, this bill, which I looked, it's 890 pages.
I looked through it yesterday.
Has cap and trade right in there.
Of course, it's very complicated language, but wow, what a rollout.
We have this thing happening in the Gulf.
Everyone's going crazy because, you know, we're all going to die.
And, uh, and then cap and trade gets rolled out and it's now called, uh, hold on a second.
It's called, they haven't, uh, it's called the climate change bill in the, uh, public vernacular.
It is S one seven three three.
Uh, It is a bill to create clean energy jobs.
Of course, it's all about jobs.
Oh yeah, it's always about jobs.
Yes, it's always about jobs.
And the children.
Yes, it's about jobs.
Jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs.
Reduce global warming, pollution, and transition to a clean energy economy.
Short title, The Clean Energy Jobs and American Power Act.
And he had Dow Corning, he had everybody there, all the guys who were going to get a whole bunch of money.
And by the way, it's free.
John Kerry said it yesterday, this is free.
It's going to cost us nothing.
It's all free.
I need to get that clip.
It's free.
It's just free.
Don't worry about it.
It's free.
This guy's turned out to be one of the great sleazeballs.
Total asswipe.
Ever.
So everyone's on board with this program, and I want to play a clip from Geraldo.
And so, of course, this is all on the heels of the disaster, the monumental, massive disaster.
We've never seen anything like it in the history of all mankind in the Gulf.
Interesting to note that you don't see any aerial photographs.
No one's got helicopters showing this huge oil spill because I guess the oil is under the water.
Well, there's some pictures in National Geographic.
Yeah, but if it was really that horrible, why don't I see...
I hear about the turtles, but I don't see birds with oil...
Well, I had the one clip, but we didn't play it, it was the last week or the week before, I didn't move it forward, where this woman says, oh, and they found a dead bird.
Well, I don't want to downplay it, and of course, this is not fun, but it's just like healthcare.
It's like, where are all the people jumping up and down on the news saying, yay, I've got healthcare!
You don't see him because it's not happening, because it's not true.
Because if it was, I'm sure they would want to report on it.
So Geraldo has a guy go out.
And talk to a fisherman.
And by the way, the water's blue.
It's beautiful.
The guy's a salty guy.
He's got wind in his hair.
And he's being interviewed by one of Geraldo's dudes.
This is what we all love.
Even Greenpeace recognizes America's need to be energy independent.
And Steiner scoffs at conspiracy theories that the Obama administration was slow to respond because it secretly wanted to undermine offshore oil industry.
By the way, that's a little message to us to play the clip.
Hey, no agenda guys!
We're talking about you!
I think that's kind of ludicrous.
Noah has placed a ban on fishing in most of the Gulf, costing billions.
Was the ban an overreaction?
Isn't it possible that this water, this big body of water, will just churn and wash this stuff out?
Let's hope so.
I mean, this is an open ocean environment.
There's going to be some wave activity and such.
It's a very different ecosystem than Alaska and elsewhere.
That I find very interesting.
Because, of course, I'm not a biologist or a waterologist.
But it is a different ecosystem, he says, and the waves can make a difference.
I mean, do you hear that, John?
You agree that there's something...
It is different from Alaska.
That's what he just said.
This guy's an expert.
Okay, good.
But, while it's doing that, it's exposing all the water column organisms to toxicity that otherwise weren't.
So, I mean, there's no win out of this.
It's a lose-lose situation.
You see what's happening in the oil industry and offshore drilling...
Comparable or some kind of parallel to, like, the movie Avatar?
No!
Oh, wait!
It gets better, John!
You thought it'd stop there!
You know, these environments, we're terrestrial primates, and so we get what goes on on land.
But humans haven't spent a lot of time on the ocean.
Most people haven't.
So it's a little bit of a foreign environment for people.
But these are precious, productive environments.
The oceans sustain much of the life on Earth.
So yeah, this is a treasure, a treasure, a national treasure that we shouldn't put in.
I love the national treasure!
There's more, but wait, there's more!
There's more, there's more!
This is fantastic.
This is...
Now, your brain is about to fart.
This is our avatar.
They could, certainly could be.
Although the fight Sigourney and director James Cameron are waging to protect the rights of the indigenous people of the Amazon from a huge hydroelectric plant is a world away from the situation in the Gulf oil spill, the principle is the same.
Protecting the planet from those interested in only quick profits.
Tell me...
Since when do people...
Oil companies don't make quick profits.
It takes billions...
And I don't want to sound like an oil company, Shil, but that's just bullshit.
That's total bullshit.
And to build one of these hydroelectric plants, it takes decades to plan it and all the rest.
It's anything but a quick profit.
It's a profit, but it's not quick and it's not easy.
It gets better.
How is your life affected knowing the change that Avatar has had?
I mean, so now we're on the Avatar tip.
...in the world and making people more environmental.
But who is he talking to?
...conscious when you went to visit these people in their natural environment.
You know, what I feel that Avatar did was show the world how concerned people are about our planet.
That we are aware of the damage we're doing to our planet.
Sigourney Weaver.
Unbelievable.
Yeah, it showed people the damage we're doing to our planet.
No, it showed blue people in 3D! It is time, more than time, for us to stop now and all help each other find energy-efficient ways of producing energy.
What kills me, though?
Shameless, shameless, shameless.
Oh wait, I can roll it out.
Hold on, John.
Here it comes.
I can finally do it.
Been waiting all day.
It's John's Big Beef.
It's John's Big Beef.
It's all about things that bring him grief.
He doesn't scream.
He doesn't shout.
He reaches in and whips it out.
He doesn't care who he offends when he starts his rants.
It's John's Big Beef.
It's John's Big Beef.
It's too big for his pants I think that's your first and last playing of that Not short ditty Ha ha ha!
We'll be right back.
Oh my god!
It's so big!
It's your big beef.
Yeah.
Alright.
But yeah, it's completely outrageous.
It's just ridiculous.
And this is on Fox?
Oh yeah, but listen to what Geraldo says his comeback after this bit with...
This is the clip of the day, by the way.
Yeah.
It seems to me that this may be a pivotal moment to re-energize a real environmental movement.
Not the, you know...
Politicians and others who are claiming, making preposterous claims, not backed by science, but having kids and people get involved the way they did in previous disasters.
Three Mile Island, for instance, or Chernobyl.
I knew you'd love it.
Kids are getting involved in Chernobyl.
They don't have any hair.
Let me tell you, that's one aspect of it.
Kids need to get involved.
The politicians can't change anything.
Kids who are involved in Chernobyl.
Those bald kids are from Chernobyl.
Listen.
See the Deepwater Horizon disaster as the Three Mile Island, even the Exxon Valdez, a way to change the industry.
You know, the tanker industry was changed.
The nuclear industry was changed.
So this is going to be a catalyst, and environmentalists want to see more of a move to cleaner energy as a result.
So it just goes on and on and on.
This is unbelievable.
It's because the Democrats run Fox.
I mean, I thought Fox at least had some semblance of middle-of-the-road to right-wing attitude about things.
This is just out-and-out...
Crap!
What's Geraldo doing there?
I mean, why doesn't he just go to CNBC? Well, because Fox is run by the Democrats.
I'm sorry, CNBC. It's run by the Democrats.
It is run by...
Obviously, it's run by the Democrats to have this report, which was nothing less than pathetic.
And I'm glad I didn't see it, because my blood would have been boiling by the time I had dubbed it.
So, the thing that gets me, and of course, I watch a lot of C-SPAN... All the politicians are doing the same thing.
We need clean energy.
Hey, I don't think anyone is against windmills.
I don't think anyone is against solar.
But it doesn't work well enough.
You can't just like...
So we're still a money loser.
Yeah, it doesn't work.
Nuclear?
Alright, I'm all for that.
What does the administration give us?
A couple of bullshit promises for maybe eight nuclear plants, maybe whatever.
And the problem that we have with nukes in this country in particular...
Well, no.
There's also the fact that, you know, people, well, France, France, France.
France has a standardized power plant.
Everyone is the same.
If you hire somebody that runs the power plant and, you know, outside of Chinon at some other place in France, the controls are the same.
In the United States of America, all the nuke power plants that we've done are all custom made.
They're all different.
They're extremely expensive.
They're crap.
By comparison.
Because, oh, we've got to use the latest technology.
So they keep changing things.
And General Electric, of course, is the big winner in that regard.
They're one of the many companies.
But GE, that's why you never hear anything really negative about these things on MSNBC. It's a corrupt, horrible situation.
I don't know.
I just find this distressing.
They keep propagandizing people at the level of a movie called Avatar.
I mean, do they really think the public is that stupid?
Yes!
Yes, John!
Yes!
Yes!
It's so obvious.
Water.
Order.
Shut up.
Well, let's credit some of our non-slave listeners.
Yes, it's about time.
Obviously, who think for themselves for helping us out on this last show.
And by the way, we do have show number 200 coming up on Sunday.
And now is the time.
I don't want to promote it, but now is the time if you want to be one of the executive or associate executive producers for show number 200.
And God knows if we'll get to 500, which will be the next big breakthrough.
We're not going to do 250 or 333 or something like that?
Oh, we definitely would do 333 now that you mention it.
Yeah, thank you.
I thought so.
Oh yeah, 333.
Absolutely.
That's the next milestone in our career.
250 might happen too.
If we get hungry, we'll do 250.
If I get a huge tax bill or some shit like that.
Which can happen any minute after you brought in the Japanese machine gun.
That's how they do it.
They're like, hey, 2007, you still owe us money from when you were rich, you bastard.
Come here.
I'm just waiting for it.
We have a report of a Japanese machine gun.
Where'd you get the report?
Oh, these guys are bragging about it on some podcast.
So Adam Burkpile, who I believe is the creator of the Pocket No Agenda app, Donated $150, so I'm going to presume that's from sales of the Pocket No Agenda app, which I have to say is one of my favorites.
I really do like it.
It's a winner.
Yeah.
John Snyder from Chicago.
The run of numbers, the straight, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, $123.45.
Then we have Daniel Terstenyi.
From Woodbury, Connecticut.
Adam, please dedicate a song to my wife on this Friday's DSC. Oh, okay, I'll do that on Friday.
Sorry about that.
She's a big fan, by the way.
He's clearly supporting the whole concept of the show with his $110.20.
Then we have Anonymous from Montreal, Quebec, Canada.
Adam, stop promoting Doctors Without Borders.
Look into one of their founders, Dr.
Bernard Kushner, French Foreign Secretary.
Great show.
Well, I don't think I've been overly promoting them, have I? No, we actually only mentioned them a couple of times during the early days of Haiti.
But we will look into this.
We will find the perfect charity for the Haitian relief, and I'm getting the opinion, or coming to the conclusion.
We got a good note from one of our producers.
Yeah, I actually did some research on that, and I wouldn't mind talking about it.
On the International Red Cross?
No, on Haiti and the International Red Cross.
I'm not there yet, but Haiti.
Okay, well, the International Red Cross is just an out-and-out.
They've got nothing to do with anything.
They're a profitable organization, I calculated.
Yeah, and they're a human rights operation that's got nothing to do with medicine.
And they're setting up shop in Haiti.
I looked at their balance sheet.
They have $600 million in the bank.
Wow.
Yeah, huh?
Well, some of it's in derivatives, by the way.
About 10%.
Why not?
Yeah, good.
Christopher Descato, double nickels on the dime, from Las Vegas, Nevada.
Hey, got a better job two weeks ago.
I told myself I was able to find a better job this year.
I would start a plan to become a knight.
Four days later, I got a call from an old boss, basically offering me my dream job and a change to move back to where my family lives.
I'm driving across the country from Las Vegas to P.A., My friend Steve from Detroit is a douchebag.
He's been listening from day one but not contributing.
And Harry Meyer from Stevenson Ranch, California.
Also 5151.
And then we have the Click Lab Limited from Auckland, New Zealand.
John, that's wrong.
That's for Dvorak Uncensored.
Oh, that shouldn't be on that list.
Okay, take that off.
And Lisa Lang has started on her layaway program.
Good for her.
She's from Fitzroy, North Victoria in Australia.
We've got to go to Australia.
And we also have three more that came in on our Deuce Club listings, which we'll be discussing on this special show, which I should mention.
Laggers and the Double Nickel and the Dime program, Matthew McDonald, Peter Biva, That is the sound, John, of me unsheathing, if you wouldn't mind grabbing yours.
Yes, very good.
We want to ask Adam Miller to come over here.
He's actually, if he was listening to the stream live, it's been an extra long wait for him to be just a regular dude named Adam Miller, because we had that kernel panic and everything crashed.
Adam Miller, kneel before us, please.
Very good.
As we now dub thee and name thee, Sir Adam Miller, Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable.
John, we need the extra long ones for this bit.
Here it comes.
Yeah, okay.
We are going to do a slew of knight noirs.
These are the black knights who have contributed over time, and somehow we just didn't get to them because we couldn't count.
You know the rules.
If you support the show with up to $1,000 over time, all donations count, then you can become a knight at the No Agenda Roundtable.
John, why don't you just give us all the names in one go, and then I'll give them one big clunk with a sword and do them all at once.
Yeah, thanks.
Thanks for doing that since I just said my screen.
I got the wrong screen up.
Aaron Jones, Philip Evans, Roland Ruth, Kelly Spongberg.
I got the last two.
Margaret George and Todd Simmons.
Kneel before the round table.
You have the honor bestowed upon thee of Night Noir.
Please...
Enjoy your future ring and join the Knights of the No Agenda Roundtable.
I like the Sir Roland of Wooddale.
And by the way, knights can create their own uniform.
They can put as many crazy things on their uniform as they want.
They're like generals.
Yep, they're like U.S. generals.
They can...
Well, of course, we all communicate with each other.
They get special benefits.
We do stuff for our nights.
Whenever you...
Winter, spring, summer, or fall, all you got to do is call.
And we'll come running for our knights.
And of course, as always, I want to thank everyone who is on the monthly programs, $5 a month, the lucky $30, people who are saving up to become knights.
It's highly appreciated, and all we want is value for value.
If you think we're putting some into this and you see some value, then you give us whatever value you think it is.
Yeah, and if you think about what your time is worth, the fact that we don't have commercials, to the tune of probably saving you four hours, if you listen to the show all the time, and a lot of people do, saving you probably four, five, maybe six hours a month of your personal time.
What is your time worth?
We would appreciate it on a monthly basis.
You know, it's a cheap investment, to be honest about it, to help us out.
It's cheaper than one of Elliot Spitzer's hookers.
Yeah, he had the big money hookers, I think.
He was with the two $3,000 girls.
And I don't think they were even worth it, really, when I looked at them.
Hey, the Voyager 2, John, which I recall, I was probably, crap, I don't know, 10?
No, not even 10 years old.
When did this thing launch?
Voyager 2 launched in, here it is, 1977.
The feature.
Sorry?
V'ger.
That's the one that becomes a Borg robot and comes back and tries to kill us all.
Well, it's starting as Voyager 2 all of a sudden started to transmit data that NASA could not decode.
So, now of course, you know, the Voyager, this is the one that we put a whole bunch, we put like Chuck Berry, Johnny B. Goode, you know, we put music in there, we put like cymbals and, you know, some poppy seeds and some other stuff, and, you know, hey, if you guys discover us out there, and this is what we're all about, here's who we are, and this thing sends back signals, takes about 13 hours for the signals to To reach either way.
And of course, NASA has been in contact with it continuously.
It's now at the very edge of our solar system.
And on April 22nd, the data packets returning from Voyager 2 cannot be decoded.
They've changed.
So I'm thinking...
Someone's on board sending messages back.
Some kid.
Some space kid is on there like, hey, let me send some stuff back.
He's probably sending his version of Johnny B. Goode back.
So NASA is somewhat puzzled over this.
So I think it's kind of interesting that That the data packets change.
I mean, that doesn't just happen.
You know, why would the computer all of a sudden just like start changing the packets?
I wish it was like open source and we could get these packets and they should do like a SETI at home type thing.
And, you know, they should let everyone work on it and try and decode what messages are coming back.
I mean, don't we own this data as citizens of the United States of Gitmo?
I would think.
Yeah, it would be nice.
I want to give some props to one of our producers.
As you know, our listeners are our producers.
I'm seeing more and more of this, of people doing the research for us.
By the way, I think we forgot to mention that people, if they want to donate, where they can go.
Yeah, that would be helpful, wouldn't it?
That would be helpful.
Noagendashow.com, Dvorak.org, slash N-A. And channeldvorak.com slash NA. That might be useful.
And especially if you want to be one of the producers of the 200th show, I think I would encourage participation.
And by the way, we still have the Deuce Club.
It finishes off at show 200.
We're still collecting $200 for the 200th show as a tribute.
And we're going to have a celebration episode, which is going to deconstruct our own show.
And that's still going on, dvorak.org slash deuce.
And I send a mailing out, you know, and people, oh, you know, you're sending too many mailings.
I send like two a month.
Oh, too many mailings, right.
How many shows do you get a month?
We do too many shows, John.
Let's cut back.
So anyway, just normal complainers.
But anyway, the point is that this is a good moment to join the Deuce Club.
And of course, some people pointed out that our logo for the Deuce Club looks like two enormous breasts.
And you think that's a mistake?
Of course it's not a mistake.
Exactly.
I'm just amazed that people think it's a mistake.
By the way, the chat room has already solved the Voyager 2 issue.
They say that the Voyager's SSL certificate from Network Solutions expired.
So that's clearly what's going on there.
So our producer, Kevin Flick...
Did some work on Haiti.
Of course, you know the drill by now.
This is a total takeover of the country.
It's going to be a great tourist destination.
Bill Clinton, who economically screwed the country throughout his entire visit in the White House, is now the UN special envoy, and he's in charge of the billions of dollars.
But interestingly enough, the people of Haiti are drowning and are dying now.
But, of course, we only need about 30,000 of them to man the hotels.
That's probably what they're thinking.
So, all these links are in the show notes.
I'm not going to belabor it.
But he found an interesting path of articles.
The oil developers are about to buy the island of, I guess it's Jonave.
And this is about two miles from the epicenter of the earthquake.
And these guys have been trying to buy this for years.
And now all of a sudden it looks like they're going to buy it.
They're actually buying the island.
And it's so funny when you see some of the paperwork from...
Global Renewable Energy.
There's Q&A, like FAQs, saying, so what will happen to the inhabitants?
Will they no longer be citizens of Haiti?
No, they'll be citizens.
Well, what will life be like?
Life will be the same, only better.
That's literally their answer.
They call themselves Global Renewable Energy, but they're an oil outfit.
And so in September of 2009, this is just three months before the earthquake, Bill Clinton spoke At the annual Haitian Unity Congress.
And, of course, the Global Renewal Energy guys were there.
We've got all kinds of pictures with them.
It's so obvious what's going on there.
And it turns out, according to Global Renewable Energies...
Let me just get the FAQs for you because it's really funny.
So how many people live on La Genève?
About 90,000.
Why develop...
Well, it is situated on the Windward Passage, which is one of the world's most highly trafficked energy sea lanes.
This I did not know.
So this is why it's strategically so important, because it'll be great to have a huge port there.
It's sheltered in the Gulf of La Genève, protected by the high mountain ranges.
I mean, it doesn't get much better.
This is the perfect place, the perfect place.
What do you think?
What do you mean, what do I think?
I mean, what's it perfect to buy?
I mean, you think that they would put in, for example, it sounds to me that if there's a bunch of it, you're saying tankers go buy there?
Yeah, it's the most challenging.
So what you'd want to do, because we talked about this manipulation of the oil and gas prices.
So what you'd want to do, and this is what I would look out for in the future, this would be my prediction, as opposed to your zombie prediction.
You know what?
I'm the one with the machine gun.
You just come over here when you need protection.
When's the last time you cleaned that thing?
So anyway, I'm thinking if you have the protected port and everything, it sounds to me like a place you'd put a tank farm up.
And these big tankers that come in and offload...
I'm sorry, it's in the FAQs.
Three mammoth tanks.
You're right.
Well, I'm already ahead of myself.
Well, three is only the beginning.
I'm looking at the FAQs right now.
Oh, and it's going to be an oil refinery.
I didn't even need to read the FAQs.
I could see this coming.
Why locate an oil refinery on La Genève?
Well, the island needs to have a balance of trade and be self-sufficient.
Yeah.
For the 90,000 people who are there, they need an oil refinery.
The oil refinery will produce the diesel fuel for machinery and generators, jet fuel for the airports, bunker sea fuel for cruise ships, Petroleum coke for power plants, asphalt for required paved area, steam industrial city, and water for the industrial city.
If it were necessary to import the aforementioned supplies, the island of La Genave will be less attractive to developers.
Oh, please, give me a break.
Who the hell needs a stinky refinery?
In the United States, we've done a pretty good job of keeping the oil refiners from just basically stinking up the place.
Because if you don't have a lot of air pollution control devices on these refineries, depending on the kind of crude oil you have, generally speaking...
We don't really do a lot.
They talk about sweet and sour.
That's the typical two types of crude oil that are available.
And then there's kind of hybrids that are pretty amazing.
Bolivian oil, for example, is notorious for almost being able to pump it out of the ground and put it right into a diesel engine without refining at all.
But anyway, generally speaking, you have two kinds of oils, sweet and sour.
And the sweet oil is what we usually have here.
Sweet crude, you see it traded as a commodity.
And sweet crude goes in.
It doesn't have a lot of sulfur.
It doesn't stink up the place.
Sour crude, which there's plenty of it around, you've got to take it to some place like Haiti where you can refine it and just stink the place up without anybody worrying about it or complaining.
Because who's going to complain?
Ah, nobody.
A bunch of Haitians.
They're all drowning anyway.
So anyway, the kicker...
The very last question on the FAQ, and this goes completely to my theory of earthquake machines.
Ready?
What happens if the government of Haiti does not approve the project soon?
So this was written a couple years ago, this FAQ. The project has been delayed for nearly three years.
The developers are becoming impatient.
If the project is not approved soon, then it will be moved to the Dominican Republic.
So there you go.
Oh, interesting.
That's an idle threat, by the way.
Of course it's a threat.
Yeah, it's an idle threat, though, because the Dominican Republic, which is not going to put...
I'm assuming they're going to be doing sour crude refining, because that's what you would do.
The Dominican Republic wouldn't put up with it, so they wouldn't allow a refinery like that in their area.
So, anyway, from this site, now I started to do some research.
I bump across two...
Oh, by the way, one other thing.
Monsanto, those nice folks.
Where's my jingle for them?
I haven't used that in such a long time.
Here it is.
Yeah, you lost it.
They're so nice.
They're helping out the Haitians.
They sent them 475 tons of genetically modified seeds.
Thank you, Monsanto.
That sounds sweet of you.
That's so nice.
So from this site, I bump around on some pro-Haitian sites, and I come across something called the United States Institute of Peace.
Have you ever heard of this?
I did.
I not only heard of it, but they had them on C-SPAN once, and I tried to get some clips from a speech the guy was giving, but it was so dull, I didn't get anything.
Well, these guys, and they have a beautiful building, by the way.
Oh, they're loaded with money.
Oh, and by the way, the Congress pays for them.
So it's us.
We're basically paying for it.
It's just, it's amazing.
They are the ones...
No, we have to be everywhere and help people to propagate peace.
We propagate peace.
We provide...
Hold on.
The United States of Peace is an independent, non-partisan institution established and funded by Congress to increase the nation's capacity to manage international conflict without violence.
So they're all over Haiti.
And then from that, I jump to the International Crisis Group.
Oh my God!
This is an amazing thing.
Working to prevent conflict worldwide.
Because they're aligned with the United States Institute of Peace.
And then you look at the Crisis Group.
And their board of trustees...
Well, I should just mention a couple of them, perhaps.
Let me guess.
They're all one-world government guys.
Oh, yeah.
George Soros.
Kofi Annan.
Zbigniew Brzezinski.
Your buddy.
All the dudes are in here.
It's like...
It's an amazing list.
It's a great drinking club.
It is a great drinking club.
It's just amazing.
And so they're all involved with helping Haiti and keeping the peace.
Hey, the developers are becoming impatient.
Unbelievable.
So anyway, I want to thank Kevin Flick for doing that research.
All of those links are all in the show notes.
Pretty amazing.
And we had a two to the head as well, which was kind of interesting.
A Russian scientist who was at Fermilab.
Do you know what Fermilab is?
Fermilab?
Fermilab is, I think it's a collider.
Oh, maybe, yeah.
Yeah, I think it's maybe the second largest collider.
So, what happened is...
He may have been shot by someone from the future.
Well, no.
Actually, it's a she.
And 24-year-old visiting Russian scientist Maria Beloyvan...
And she fell to her death in the atrium.
It's their favorite way of doing it.
They're not quite sure how it happened, but yeah, she fell off the stairs into the atrium of the Fermilab, and of course she died.
Sixteen-story building, several bridges, one of these beautiful Hadron Collider-type things.
And so, of course, all of the conspiracy nuts who are crazier than I am are out there saying, oh, she had information about the weaponization of these colliders.
I'll put a link in the show notes about that.
But it's interesting that a 24-year-old Russian scientist stumbles and falls to her untimely death in the atrium.
It happens all the time.
Yeah, it does.
They need more safety features on these things.
It's really...
And big props to a guy I met once.
I spoke with him for a couple of hours.
His name is Young Pote.
And he is a real estate developer from the Netherlands.
And he got into a huge public fight a number of years ago because he's a very rich guy.
His idea was to create something called Chips Hole.
So you have Schip Hole, which is the airport, and they have all this real estate.
I mean, that airport is really a real estate project.
And he wanted to put in office buildings.
He wanted Cisco to be there.
He had all the contracts.
He had everything was all set.
He was good to go.
And then the government just pushed him out.
It's well documented.
He sued them.
The judges were kind of losing ground.
The Ministry of Justice switched the judges on him.
There was all kinds of crazy shit going on.
So this guy is definitely a radical.
He's very, very smart.
He's probably about 60 or 70 years old now, so he doesn't give a rat's ass.
He took out a full-page ad in one of the Gitmo Nation Lowlands newspapers and basically said, the Ministry of Justice is crap, and why are you protecting the pedophile?
Yeah.
Yep.
This is the Director General of Justice.
Who has admitted that he's a pedophile, but he's still in his position, so to speak.
And he basically is saying, you know what?
I have a whole dossier here.
If you guys don't play by the rules, neither will I. I'm going to release all the information.
Oh, well, he's going to be dead shortly.
Yeah, well, we'll see.
I hope he has backups all over the place, ready to go, be dropped into the public domain.
That's what you've got to do.
Well, the thing is, is all this information is in the public domain.
Everybody knows it, except...
Well, he might have some new stuff.
It doesn't matter.
I mean, the media won't report on it.
Yeah, I know.
And by the way, what good is it done?
Yeah, the media doesn't report on it.
They don't care.
They really don't.
So I got a couple more things here before we finish.
Yes.
Oh, one moment.
Just whistle for a second, John.
Why am I breaking up?
Mickey has a very important meeting, so I wanted to give her some extra love.
Call me.
Okay.
Okay, we're back.
We're back.
I'm like a human theremin.
Whatever that is.
Yeah, you should look it up.
Here's something that bothers me.
You notice the way the media has switched around.
I want you to play.
I've got a clip here from Keith Olderman.
Who has John Dean on, and he mentioned something interesting.
We can play the whole clip, or part of the clip, but you probably should play the whole thing.
But it's about this Miranda rights thing, which people keep talking about, and holders come out and said, well, you know, whether we should deal with some criminal as a terrorist or not.
Well, so there's...
Let me help you set this up.
There is now the...
What are they?
belligerent, combatant, terrorist, homegrown act or something that's been proposed.
So basically, if you talk crap about the government, you're belligerent, not only will your Miranda rights, but they're actually talking now about the Secretary of State being able to take away your citizenship. but they're actually talking now about the Secretary of State Which, of course, is the end around the Miranda rights, because first you take away your citizenship.
Oh, now you don't have the Miranda rights.
Well, the thing that's really going on, it seems to me, is they're actually...
And if you just listen to the news and you hear the complaining about, oh, you know, John McCain, part of this whole ridiculous situation.
Oh, they read him his Miranda rights.
They shouldn't have done that.
Why are they reading him his Miranda rights?
And so we think that the debate is about whether you should read somebody their Miranda rights.
But when you start looking into it, and John Dean, I think, points this out on this little clip I've got here on the Keith Olderman show.
And who is John Dean?
John Dean is a former White House counsel under Nixon.
And he's basically a writer, and I think he's connected somehow.
By the way, are you being an ageist?
What, Keith Olderman?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's Old Birdman.
No, I just think it's a funny pun.
Yeah, okay.
So, I mean, I'm John Olderman.
Yeah, okay.
So anyway, here's what I'm trying to get at, which is they keep talking about reading the rights, reading the rights.
No, they're talking about eliminating these rights.
In other words, even if you read them or not, you say, I want a lawyer.
They say, screw you.
You got no right to a lawyer.
That's what's going on.
They're trying to pull, and Holder's part of this, pull the entire Miranda rights thing.
Now, it's not about reading the rights, it's about having the rights.
And nobody's talking about it.
Public safety context with this new threat, I think we have to give serious consideration to at least modifying that public safety exception.
And that's one of the things that I think we're going to be reaching out to Congress to do, to come up with a proposal that is both constitutional, but that is also relevant to our time and the threat that we now face.
No indication that a broader exception to Miranda based on international terrorism would even satisfy those bending the issue for political purposes who do not want terrorist suspects at all put through our nation's criminal justice system.
Rudy Giuliani, for instance, supported Hildre's proposal.
He said it would be...
It would still be better to hold suspects like Shahzad as military detainees.
Giuliani joins the likes of Senator Lindsey Graham and Senator Joe Lieberman, who have offered various ideas about how to discard Miranda rights in the case of a terrorist suspect.
Let's bring in his promise, former White House counsel, now columnist for FindLaw.com, John Dean, also the author of Blind Ambition.
John, good evening.
Good evening, Keith.
Are we clear yet to any degree what Holder is proposing here?
Do you have any idea?
Well, I actually caught the clips and then thought, that isn't very clear, so I went back and looked at the entire transcript, and I wasn't clear at first if he was really responding just to leading questions, or if he actually had some proposal that he had in mind at the Justice Department.
It appears the latter, although I don't think he was ready to announce it on Sunday, but rather it was forced out because of the questioning.
It would seem as if a public safety exception to Miranda would be enough of a dilution, and we just saw its effectiveness in practical, real-time circumstances in New York in the capture and arrest and interrogation of Shahzad.
But why would anybody think that's not sufficient?
Well, it's certainly good political grandstanding.
The right has been hammering on this, on how tough they are on terrorism, how weak the Democrats are, so they keep pounding that drum.
It looks like Mr.
Holder and the administration is trying to respond to that.
They're never going to satisfy it.
In fact, we don't need legislation.
There's no evidence that Miranda has ever been a problem for law enforcement.
There's no evidence that it's a problem now with terrorism.
There's no evidence they need anything more in the exception than they already have.
In 2000, the Supreme Court addressed a Miranda case or a case that was supposed to...
Yeah, that's pretty outrageous.
Yeah, they basically want to be able to arrest you.
You have no rights to an attorney.
Probably just throw you in a slam or beat the crap out of you or whatever.
What happens is a van pulls up, they throw a hood over your head and you're gone.
Never heard from again.
Yeah.
Perfectly legal.
And I'm telling you that Hillary Clinton, she's doing something with this take away your citizenship.
That's a part of it, John.
Yeah.
That's the easy way around.
Who needs legislation if Hillary Clinton can say, you're no longer a citizen?
What a crazy world we live in.
It turns out President Obama has a social security number from Connecticut where he's never worked.
So we're still in dispute whether he's an actual natural-born citizen.
And someone like me and you, who were born here, we just go, oh, you're not a citizen anymore.
In the slammer you go.
Rendition flight.
Goodbye.
That's where it's leading.
So now I have one last clip.
I have a bunch, but I think there's one that's kind of interesting.
Talking about weird laws.
This is a news story that took place in the Bay Area.
The clip is secretly videotaping.
And tell me if you don't find this kind of weird.
Alright, time now for a look at stories making headlines around the Bay Area tonight.
A San Jose man is accused of secretly videotaping women's body parts while they were grocery shopping.
An off-duty sheriff's deputy noticed it happening at the Dunn Avenue Safeway in Morgan Hill.
The deputy ended up in a struggle on the ground with the suspect, Juan Rodriguez.
A Safeway customer helped the deputy make the arrest.
Rodriguez is accused of using a concealed camera for sexual gratification and battery of Wait a minute.
That's good.
No, that's it.
Is that in a new crime?
Apparently it is.
I've never heard of videotaping for the purpose of sexual gratification.
Let me hear it again.
Rodriguez.
A Safeway customer helped the deputy make the arrest.
Rodriguez is accused of using a concealed camera for sexual gratification.
Using a concealed camera for sexual gratification.
I love it!
How is this?
You can't do anything.
What about just looking at somebody for sexual gratification?
That'll be illegal next.
In fact, I have an end clip for the show, which I want to play.
We're winding it down.
Of course, we've talked a lot about how you can't show big-breasted women in Australia.
No, small-breasted is a pedophilia.
I'm sorry, small-breasted, exactly.
There's all kinds of weird stuff.
And this clip is about how women, young women, are essentially manipulating themselves.
Not manipulating, but what's the word I'm looking for?
I don't know.
They're getting labiectomies, labiectomies.
Why?
They're mutilating themselves.
Mutilating, that's the word.
Thank you, mutilating.
Well, because they think that that's what a beautiful vagina is supposed to look like.
Because they're shown all these fake vaginas that have been photoshopped and there's different ways of shooting this.
So it was like, oh, my vagina's ugly.
I have to get stuff chopped off.
It's crazy, and it's a video.
Of course, you'll be able to see that on noagendatv.com.
Caution, not safe for work at all.
You actually see one of these operations taking place.
I'm not going to look at it.
But when you hear the audio, it's interesting enough, so you don't have to actually look at it.
This goes back to your nudity is porn.
It's all this nutso stuff.
It's not getting any better.
Alright, then producer Zach responded to the Pennsylvania tax amnesty ad.
Should we just play that again real quick because it's so outrageous?
It's now posted on the Dvorak.org site and every place else.
It's disgusting.
Your name is Tom.
You live just off of 5th Street.
Nice car, Tom.
Nice house.
What's not so nice is you owe Pennsylvania $4,212 in back taxes.
Listen, Tom.
We can make this easy.
Pay online by June 18th, and we'll skip your penalty and take half off your interest.
Because, Tom, we do know who you are.
Find us before we find you.
So Zach made a call to the Pennsylvania Department of Revenue and got switched to their public relations office.
The woman there said it was the Neiman Group that devised the intimidating ad campaign.
The woman, unnamed, claimed that focus groups were done.
And these focus groups approved of the plan.
Focus groups.
Yay!
Yeah, focus groups.
Useless.
Yeah, she wouldn't tell them who were in the groups or where they were held.
The ad campaign was part of a budget deal, Governor Rendell.
This is the guy you got to kick out of office, Pennsylvania.
A part of a budget deal Governor Rendell signed off in October 2009.
The entire campaign, including website and TV ads, cost $3 million.
But she said they were hoping to recoup $190 million from the 3% of taxpayers who don't pay their state taxes.
Neiman Group located in Harrisburg in Philly.
I called them, says Zach, was told to speak with Monica Witter.
She wasn't in, so I emailed her a list of questions.
Her email is in the show notes.
She hasn't responded yet.
The claim in the following story is that the ads are working, and there's a story that they've already collected $12 million.
So I guess the shut-up slave thing works.
Yeah, maybe this group is ahead of the game.
It's what's coming, ladies and gentlemen.
And then a quick little note from Sean.
He heard us on the cheating gene meme.
And he said, hey, maybe we can put this National Enquirer story that's going around about Barack Obama cheating on Maybe they're preparing to hit us with the news that he has the cheat gene.
And of course, vaccine coming soon.
Stop your man from cheating.
Pay your taxes.
Make your vagina look pretty.
And do the right thing.
Yes!
That's what you should do.
Give more money to Haiti.
Shysters show up and take advantage of people's goods.
It's called a labiaplasty.
Great.
It's very interesting to listen to because they're drawing some of the right conclusions.
But doctors who do this are a little frightening.
Some of these doctors are in it for the money.
You think?
Thanks everybody for hanging in there throughout this program.
It was difficult if you're on the stream.
We're going to put a little...
Yeah, I edited the two pieces together.
Of course, thanks to Nerdy Dude for recording the first piece off the stream.
So I got some splicing work to do.
And I'll be doing that here in the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West in the People's Republic of Southern California.
My name's Adam Curry.
And from northern Silicon Valley where the sun is shining except when it isn't, I'm John C. Dvorak.
We'll talk to you again on Sunday, early morning service for episode 200.
Remember, dvorak.org slash deuce.
Right here on No Agenda.
This video presentation has been classified by the ABC as M.
It contains material that is not recommended for persons under 15 years. .
I need to warn you that this next story contains footage of genitals and surgical operations that some of you may find confronting.
There's one part of the female body that most of us have seen way more often in pictures than we have in real life.
But has censorship skewed our idea of what a normal vagina looks like?
like and could it be contributing to a new trend in cosmetic surgery?
Labiaplasty is a term given to the surgical improvement of female labia, which are the lips of the female genitalia.
This would generally be healed to a single crease, which is the terminology I've heard used before in the industry.
It's either done with a scalpel or with scissors.
You would take just the pendulous part of the labia.
So this would be just made up into a single crease where you just can't really see any of the inner labia.
Each of these men have jobs which require them to trim the labia minora, that's the inner lips, of vaginas.
One of them is a graphic designer at a soft porn mag who has asked that we conceal his identity.
We have replaced his voice.
The other is a plastic surgeon.
What you would see most of the time in the media and in the published literature is something like this closed labia majora.
Could there be a connection between the two roles?
Labiaplasty is becoming increasingly popular in Australia, growing at a much faster rate than other cosmetic surgeries.
Experts say there are a number of reasons for this trend, but we think there's one that's been overlooked, and that's censorship.
In Australia, unrestricted soft porn mags, that's M15 Plus 1s such as Penthouse, Picture and People, are allowed to show frontal nudity, but only discreet genital detail.
But what if your genitals aren't as discreet as the classification board would like them to be?
It's the same as saying what does a normal face look like or what does a normal nose look like.
They all look normal.
They all look like a vagina.
But, you know, you get difference in the filling of the labia majora, different pigmentation, different areas of the labia minora, which are a little bit more pendulous.
The clitoral hood might be a little bit more folded on itself.
One can't really say that there is...
That's right folks, not all Poonanis look like this.
So why then is this the only kind ever shown in soft porn?
So the stuff that's the outside of the lips of the vagina here, that would be defined as very detailed.
So to avoid getting busted by the censorship board, we just take all this out.
We don't instruct clients how to edit their magazines.
It's their commercial decision.
If they want a particular image in a particular classification, that's their commercial decision.
So would the board not allow, in an unrestricted publication, an image of a woman who had protruding in a labia?
Not necessarily, but saying that too may be depending upon the pose.
The magazines say otherwise.
We spoke to Brad Boxall, former editor of the Picture magazine for seven years and later publisher of Picture and People magazines.
He had this to say.
The only acceptable vagina, as far as the classification board is concerned, is one that's neat and tidy in their eyes.
They basically consider the labia minora too offensive for soft-born.
Off the record, a number of men's mag insiders, including a current editor, confirmed this claim.
To test it, we took our own series of pussy portraits, different women, all photographed in exactly the same way, to the board.
Well, that would possibly be allowed, I think.
Okay.
And how about this?
Possibly.
This one?
Possibly, but you're quite a...
It's hard to say again without...
So why do you hesitate a little more?
I guess it's...
Clearly there's more genital detail in that depiction.
Well, I know what you're saying.
I know what you're saying.
I put it to the magazines that they're doing this for commercial reasons and they vigorously deny that.
They say they resent having to heal things to a single crease and that they're certainly not doing it to suit the taste of their readership.
As far as they're concerned, this is absolutely a classification issue.
Well, that's their opinion.
The classification board can spin it any way they like, but the effect of their decisions is that all but one particular body type is too rude to be shown in soft porn. -
I think most women don't really examine other people's vaginas and so they don't really have an idea except from literature and you don't see the normal range because all people that I see fall into a normal range but they have issues with It looking a little bit untidy or too bulky or, you know, too pendulous.
So that, I think, is a major reason why people sort of seek out improving their little bits, I suppose, for want of a better word.
What's happening here is far more than just photoshopping out blemishes.
It's actually removing a part of the human body.
Well obviously it would be better if we didn't have to do it.
I mean, this is reality and we're messing with reality.
This is what people actually look like.
For every woman who seeks surgery because she thinks she looks abnormal, there are many more who are embarrassed and self-conscious about having lippy lady bits.
If the classification guidelines are preventing a certain body type from being shown, then maybe they should be reviewed.
You can see extended interviews with the classification board, with the magazine graphic designer and with Dr Kamena on our website.
And yeah, we know that technically the external female genitalia is called the vulva and that the vagina refers to the inside bit.
We just wanted to use common language so that we didn't confuse people.
Plus, we just like saying vagina.
Vagina.
Don't look over here.
Nothing to see here.
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