The Michael Knowles Show - Real ANSWERS & Real DRINKS With Nick Freitas | YES or NO
Aired: 2025-05-30
Duration: 29:21


=== Nick Freitas' Bearded Bet (13:03) ===

[00:00:00]  Protestants and Catholics need to stop bickering and focus on the real enemy.
[00:00:04]  The Jews!
[00:00:05]  No, no, that's the Jehovah's Witness.
[00:00:07]  The Jehovah's Witness.
[00:00:08]  Thank you.
[00:00:23]  Welcome to Yes or No, the Bibulous Battle.
[00:00:28]  To discover who knows whom better.
[00:00:31]  My guest today is Nick Freitas, a former U.S. Army Green Beret, current Virginia State delegate.
[00:00:37]  How do we play?
[00:00:38]  I will ask Nick a yes or no question.
[00:00:41]  He will select his answer away from my prying eyes.
[00:00:44]  Then I'll guess how he answered.
[00:00:47]  If I guess correctly, I get a point.
[00:00:49]  If I guess incorrectly, I lose a point.
[00:00:52]  No matter what, I will probably drink.
[00:00:54]  Then it's Nick's turn.
[00:00:56]  Neither of us has seen the questions beforehand.
[00:00:59]  Whoever has the most points at the end wins.
[00:01:01]  The stakes could be higher.
[00:01:03]  Let's get started.
[00:01:05]  Nick, thank you for being here.
[00:01:07]  Pleasure, Michael.
[00:01:07]  Pleasure.
[00:01:09]  I often have a wager at the top of this show, but I'm going to let the audience in on this.
[00:01:14]  Yeah.
[00:01:15]  It's early in the morning.
[00:01:16]  I was out late last night.
[00:01:18]  We're drinking.
[00:01:20]  Martinis, and what is it?
[00:01:22]  Just bourbon on the rocks.
[00:01:23]  Burra, Tennessee Mimosa.
[00:01:24]  Yeah.
[00:01:25]  At about 8.30 in the morning.
[00:01:26]  Yeah, allegedly.
[00:01:27]  So, I don't know.
[00:01:28]  The only thing I can even think to wager, and it's something I think you'll appreciate, is a box of my beautiful Mayflower cigars.
[00:01:34]  Oh, gosh.
[00:01:35]  You're too kind.
[00:01:36]  Now, I don't know.
[00:01:37]  Do you have a wager?
[00:01:39]  I'll tell you what.
[00:01:40]  So, you have revealed, and I'm now going to reveal to the world, you don't own a pistol.
[00:01:45]  I don't own a pistol.
[00:01:46]  That's embarrassing.
[00:01:47]  You will get a pistol of my choosing.
[00:01:51]  Wow, alright.
[00:01:52]  Now, it may have some bling on it.
[00:01:54]  I don't know.
[00:01:55]  It could be something embarrassing.
[00:01:56]  Or you could get something really cool and tactical.
[00:01:58]  But I think that's unfair.
[00:02:00]  I would feel bad if I left you.
[00:02:02]  Wow, I'm honored.
[00:02:04]  And listen, if you feel gypped or anything at the end, you always give me a cap gun or something.
[00:02:08]  I didn't say what kind.
[00:02:10]  This could get really bad for you.
[00:02:12]  Alright, so if you were a lady, I would say you go first.
[00:02:16]  We're men.
[00:02:16]  But you're the ladies.
[00:02:18]  If I don't own a pistol, certainly.
[00:02:21]  Okay.
[00:02:22]  Is Jasmine Crockett more dangerous than AOC?
[00:02:29]  I need to guess how you will answer.
[00:02:31]  Is Jasmine Crockett more dangerous than AOC?
[00:02:37]  Let's say you would say no.
[00:02:40]  Correct.
[00:02:41]  That's correct.
[00:02:41]  Why not?
[00:02:42]  AOC is actually Jasmine Crockett is very loud, but she also is far easier to caricature, which is saying something because AOC is incredibly easy to caricature, but I actually think she's much more charismatic and she's much more politically savvy than Jasmine Crockett.
[00:03:02]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:03:02]  AOC, this is not 2018 anymore.
[00:03:04]  AOC has grown.
[00:03:06]  She's gotten better at this.
[00:03:07]  She's also obviously running for president.
[00:03:09]  Yes.
[00:03:12]  Yeah, she's running to be the last president of the Soviet Socialist Republic of the United States.
[00:03:19]  Absolutely.
[00:03:20]  So now we both have to drink?
[00:03:21]  Yes, we both get to drink.
[00:03:23]  That sounds good.
[00:03:25]  Breakfast of champions.
[00:03:28]  You're up.
[00:03:29]  Okay.
[00:03:32]  The clearest sign that we live in a new political paradigm is that conservatives are now the ones who love electric cars.
[00:03:45]  Who would I answer?
[00:03:47]  I need to figure out how I would answer first before you can guess how I would answer.
[00:03:51]  I was about to guess.
[00:03:52]  I was like, he hasn't pushed a button yet.
[00:03:53]  I'm not doing this crap.
[00:03:54]  He's gonna change his mind.
[00:04:00]  Yeah, I think you would say no to that.
[00:04:05]  You got me.
[00:04:05]  You got me.
[00:04:06]  It's close, but I would say the clearest sign for me that we're in a new political paradigm, the clearest sign is that A Kennedy is serving in the Republican administration.
[00:04:17]  Two Democrat presidential candidates are actually in this administration.
[00:04:20]  But the second clear is the cultural sign.
[00:04:23]  All the weird, crunchy, hippie moms are on the right.
[00:04:27]  They used to be very firmly on the left, but the hippies are on the right.
[00:04:31]  If you are free-range educating your children while making sourdough, it's like you are hardcore.
[00:04:37]  You're a fascist.
[00:04:38]  You are a Francisco Franco following.
[00:04:43]  Black shirt haven't passed.
[00:04:45]  Yes, that's true.
[00:04:46]  So, yes, I agree.
[00:04:47]  The electric cars, that's definitely not something I saw coming.
[00:04:50]  I still make fun of my friends who possess them, but you're not the weirdest.
[00:04:55]  Right, okay.
[00:04:56]  All right.
[00:05:00]  Before I state this prompt, we have to watch a video.
[00:05:03]  Okay.
[00:05:05]  You said Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide.
[00:05:09]  People don't believe it.
[00:05:10]  You know a suicide when you see one, and that's what that was.
[00:05:14]  He killed himself.
[00:05:15]  Again, you want me to get...
[00:05:19]  He killed himself.
[00:05:22]  I don't care what these feds say, Epstein definitely didn't kill himself.
[00:05:28]  I have to guess how you would answer.
[00:05:30]  Yeah.
[00:05:30]  Yeah.
[00:05:37]  It's actually phrased.
[00:05:39]  In a difficult way, because you say, yes, I don't care what these feds say, Epstein killed himself, or no.
[00:05:45]  I can't tell if it's like a double negative.
[00:05:47]  I would say that a yes would be agreeing with the statement, a no would be disagreeing with the statement.
[00:05:52]  Got it, got it.
[00:05:53]  I'm happy to explain how your game works to you.
[00:05:55]  Thank you.
[00:05:56]  I could use every episode.
[00:05:58]  I need it.
[00:06:03]  You don't think Epstein killed himself.
[00:06:07]  I absolutely do not think he killed himself.
[00:06:11]  Here's my hang-up.
[00:06:12]  I don't know Kash Patel personally.
[00:06:14]  I've heard good things.
[00:06:15]  I just don't know him.
[00:06:16]  I do know Dan Bongino.
[00:06:17]  I've known Dan Bongino for years.
[00:06:18]  I don't think Dan would lie.
[00:06:21]  Now, it's possible he got it wrong.
[00:06:24]  He read a report.
[00:06:26]  Maybe he's insinuating that Epstein was allowed to kill himself.
[00:06:31]  So I don't know what to think.
[00:06:33]  I'm confident Dan would not lie.
[00:06:35]  I just don't know Cash.
[00:06:36]  But it is kind of crazy.
[00:06:39]  Because I was pretty certain he didn't kill himself.
[00:06:44]  So what's going on?
[00:06:46]  Again, I don't claim to be drinking buddies with either one of them.
[00:06:50]  I've met Cash.
[00:06:51]  I've never met Dan.
[00:06:52]  I think both of them have always struck me as trustworthy guys and willing to say unpopular things when they believe it is true.
[00:06:59]  So I'm not accusing either one of them of lying.
[00:07:02]  But lying implies intention.
[00:07:05]  Yes.
[00:07:05]  They could have just gotten it wrong.
[00:07:07]  Yes.
[00:07:08]  When cash goes through this whole thing of as a public defender, as a prosecutor, as this.
[00:07:14]  Well, as a guy that know that politicians love to cover their own ass, there's no way that dude killed himself, right?
[00:07:22]  Or even if it was one of those things.
[00:07:24]  Because here's the deal.
[00:07:25]  You can't technically, at least in my world, kill yourself under duress.
[00:07:31]  So if it's one of those issues, killing yourself and the way I kind of, the pure It's, I don't want to necessarily do, or I want to die and so I'm killing myself.
[00:07:46]  Yes, yeah, yeah.
[00:07:47]  I don't think Epstein wanted to die.
[00:07:50]  And even if he's the one, let's say he physically caused himself to die, I don't think that was because that's what Jeff had planned that afternoon.
[00:07:58]  That is a very intimidating analysis coming from a green bread.
[00:08:04]  Like, Michael, I want to make a distinction here.
[00:08:06]  You can't really kill yourself under duress.
[00:08:13]  Alright, you're up.
[00:08:14]  I think we get to drink now.
[00:08:15]  Yes, absolutely.
[00:08:20]  Jeff didn't freaking kill himself.
[00:08:22]  Alright.
[00:08:24]  Oh, here we go.
[00:08:25]  We also have a video prompt first for this.
[00:08:30]  I can't believe this crap.
[00:08:31]  22 years of marriage, three kids, two combat deployments, and my wife sits down today and tells me she doesn't love me anymore.
[00:08:38]  That's not what I said.
[00:08:39]  What'd you say?
[00:08:40]  I said I think it's time to shave the beard.
[00:08:42]  It's the same damn thing.
[00:08:45]  Okay, with one year of fully committed facial hair cultivation, you, Michael Knowles, could grow a beard.
[00:08:54]  Okay, with one year.
[00:08:55]  One year.
[00:08:57]  Committed.
[00:08:57]  Yes.
[00:08:58]  Committed.
[00:08:59]  There may be ointments.
[00:09:02]  Just for men, jail.
[00:09:06]  No shaving on Sundays?
[00:09:08]  Okay.
[00:09:15]  I don't think you even believe that.
[00:09:16]  Wow.
[00:09:18]  Little faith that we have.
[00:09:20]  So, what could happen?
[00:09:23]  I've got a sweet little baby face here.
[00:09:26]  I can grow a mustache in about 45 minutes.
[00:09:29]  The mustache I've had since I was like 11 or something.
[00:09:32]  But the beard, I've always struggled.
[00:09:34]  So, over the decades, the huge patches, they've shrunk down, but then I still get, even today, I'm 35 years old, I have three boys.
[00:09:43]  I still get the little patch here, I get the little patch here, whatever.
[00:09:47]  So what it really comes down to, not to sound like Bill Clinton, Because if you're saying, could I have a beard without a single patch anywhere?
[00:09:59]  No.
[00:10:00]  Well, Michael, let me help you.
[00:10:02]  The definition of a beard, you have before you.
[00:10:04]  I know.
[00:10:05]  That's a glorious...
[00:10:08]  And this is lower scale.
[00:10:08]  So the funniest thing...
[00:10:12]  All the razors used to break, until I used Jeremy.
[00:10:19]  When I was in Iraq, because in Afghanistan a lot of guys grew beards.
[00:10:24]  In Iraq we grew big mustaches because it was cultural differences.
[00:10:28]  You wanted the full Saddam.
[00:10:29]  I had a massive mustache.
[00:10:32]  This thing was so far out of rigs it wasn't funny.
[00:10:38]  You know, Portuguese jeans means I also have, like, two huge eyebrows that are constantly trying to fuse.
[00:10:43]  And so my joke was, it's like, oh, no, no, I don't have one mustache.
[00:10:48]  I have my eyebrows.
[00:10:49]  I have three.
[00:10:50]  Are actually backup mustaches in case we ever got to go to war on three continents.
[00:10:54]  You're welcome.
[00:10:57]  That seems like a better post then.
[00:10:59]  If you're thinking about the global war on terror, and you're strictly judging it by the facial hair.
[00:11:03]  Yeah.
[00:11:04]  Less itchy.
[00:11:05]  Way cooler.
[00:11:07]  You feel like Tom Selleck in the 80s.
[00:11:09]  Or Saddam, who had drip.
[00:11:12]  For all his flaws, the guy had drip.
[00:11:13]  My nickname to the Iraqis was Abu Schwab, which is father of mustache.
[00:11:18]  Because I'm telling you, this thing was massive.
[00:11:21]  My wife, my beautiful bright teen, it is not Mayan facial hair.
[00:11:25]  When she saw a picture of that, she's like, baby.
[00:11:28]  That doesn't come home with you.
[00:11:29]  That's too much.
[00:11:30]  That does not come home with you.
[00:11:31]  You're going to end up on Dateline with that thing.
[00:11:35]  Luckily, you didn't have to shave at all, though, because I assume you had Saddam here, and then it was like Uday Hussain.
[00:11:43]  I'm keeping these, at least.
[00:11:45]  Yeah, I got to keep those.
[00:11:46]  Those even got trimmed down a little bit.
[00:11:48]  Just like Uday Hussain.
[00:11:51]  Before we go on, you stop what you're doing, you go to helixsleep.com slash Knowles.
[00:11:55]  I've told you for a while about how my little boy is soon going to be switching from a crib to a bed, how I was thinking about treating him, indulging him with a Helix mattress.
[00:12:07]  Well, the time is now, my friends.
[00:12:10]  My little toddler, his beautiful Helix mattress is being shipped.
[00:12:17]  And he is going to be so excited.
[00:12:19]  I just don't want to spoil him.
[00:12:20]  But it's so good.
[00:12:22]  I want my kids to have the very best.
[00:12:23]  I figure I've had my Helix mattress for, what, five years now or something like that.
[00:12:27]  Why not give the children the same privilege?
[00:12:31]  They don't just sell you a random mattress at Helix.
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[00:12:36]  Whether you're a side sleeper, a back sleeper, somewhere in between, they got you covered.
[00:12:39]  You take the sleep quiz, find your ideal match.
[00:12:42]  It is a real comfy.
[00:12:47]  Right now is the perfect time to upgrade your sleep because Helix has a fantastic Memorial Day sale.

=== Freitas Versus Spanberger (04:20) ===

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[00:13:01]  That's helixsleep.com slash Knowles.
[00:13:03]  27% off site-wide, plus a free bedding bundle with any Lux or Elite mattress order.
[00:13:11]  That is helixsleep.com slash Knowles.
[00:13:13]  Start sleeping better tonight.
[00:13:16]  Now that censorship has been lifted, can we finally admit the 2020 election was rigged?
[00:13:23]  And I'm not talking about Trump versus Biden.
[00:13:26]  I mean Freitas versus Spanberger.
[00:13:28]  Wow.
[00:13:38]  What would you say?
[00:13:49]  I think you would say no.
[00:13:53]  No.
[00:13:55]  Because, you know why?
[00:13:55]  Because no politician ever Would publicly say the election was rigged, even though every single election is rigged because of all the shenanigans that go on.
[00:14:04]  We're talking party committees.
[00:14:06]  We're talking up to the general.
[00:14:07]  There's always shenanigans.
[00:14:08]  This was the advice FDR gave to LBJ when LBJ lost his first big race.
[00:14:12]  He said, oh, buddy, you forgot to sit on the ballot box.
[00:14:15]  You blew it.
[00:14:16]  So you would say, no, it wasn't rigged.
[00:14:18]  What people generally mean when they say rigged is illegal voting.
[00:14:23]  Yes.
[00:14:23]  That's what they mean.
[00:14:24]  Now, if you want to go through the whole idea that the, and I was there when they did it, where they changed all of the election laws in Virginia during a special election, which legally they should not have done.
[00:14:35]  Yeah.
[00:14:35]  If you want to talk about all of the other, you know, crazy, there's one thing, there's one thing that always gives me pause in my particular election.
[00:14:44]  And that was, we were winning on election night.
[00:14:46]  We're winning election morning.
[00:14:48]  I can't remember when exactly it was, day of or day before.
[00:14:51]  A thumb drive.
[00:14:53]  An unmarked thumb drive shows up in the bluest county in the district with 15,000 votes.
[00:14:58]  Now, the voter ID numbers matched up.
[00:15:00]  Okay.
[00:15:01]  But some chain of custody issues there.
[00:15:04]  Yeah, yeah, that's curious.
[00:15:05]  I once had a reporter sit down and talk about, you know, was the election rigged and whatnot.
[00:15:10]  I said, look, there's a lot of shady stuff that went on.
[00:15:11]  We were talking about Trump.
[00:15:13]  And she goes, well, I just think this is irresponsible.
[00:15:15]  I said, can I ask you a question?
[00:15:17]  Yeah.
[00:15:17]  If Nick Freitas...
[00:15:21]  Was behind in the polls on election night.
[00:15:23]  Was behind in the tally on election night.
[00:15:24]  Behind the next day.
[00:15:26]  Behind in the afternoon.
[00:15:27]  And then all of a sudden, a thumb drive shows up that, golly gee willikers, we just missed Mark.
[00:15:34]  In my home district that is 64% Trump.
[00:15:39]  And all of a sudden I won.
[00:15:41]  Would you have written an article on that?
[00:15:44]  No, that's different.
[00:15:45]  Yeah, yeah, I probably would have.
[00:15:47]  But you won't on this one, will you?
[00:15:49]  And that's why you're a fraud, right?
[00:15:51]  So, yeah.
[00:15:52]  That whole thing, it was so amazing.
[00:15:55]  because the Democrats had to keep up the ruse that there was no question about First of all, they shouldn't exist in the first place.
[00:16:09]  But second of all, moving them in some cases illegally far away from county clerks with money that came from big tech and Mark Zuckerberg through these left-wing orgs.
[00:16:18]  I mean, point after point.
[00:16:21]  Opening yourself up to fraud.
[00:16:23]  I'm going to say this.
[00:16:24]  I'm not saying it's not possible that I lost due to fraud.
[00:16:27]  I'm saying that until I have definitive evidence on something like that, I'm not a sore loser.
[00:16:32]  It's not even a sore loser.
[00:16:33]  It's just I don't like...
[00:16:39]  I can point to all the things that, hey, we could have done this better, we could have done this better, we could have done that better.
[00:16:43]  So I'm going to focus on things I can control.
[00:16:46]  It was like Nixon.
[00:16:48]  I think it's the respectable, manly thing to do.
[00:16:51]  But Nixon, who very possibly had a presidential election stolen from him, and then had the presidency stolen from him by dirty, rotten, deep state actors.

=== Why We Baptize Infants (03:48) ===

[00:17:00]  And this guy never complained about it.
[00:17:03]  He just kind of took his lumps.
[00:17:05]  He stepped down.
[00:17:06]  I wouldn't say he never complained.
[00:17:07]  I'm sure he privately complained.
[00:17:08]  I mean, he never went out there, this was a rigged election in 1960, or, you know, these guys threw me out.
[00:17:13]  He did his one big interview with Frost and just...
[00:17:18]  And he's like, that guy.
[00:17:20]  That was like the trial run for 2020.
[00:17:23]  All right.
[00:17:24]  All right.
[00:17:28]  Protestants and Catholics need to stop bickering and focus on the real enemy.
[00:17:32]  The Jews.
[00:17:33]  The Amish.
[00:17:34]  Oh, the Amish.
[00:17:36]  Hold on.
[00:17:39]  So we're still targeting Germans.
[00:17:40]  Yeah, that's good.
[00:17:41]  Okay, yeah, all right.
[00:17:43]  The Amish.
[00:17:52]  Wow.
[00:17:52]  Really, I have strong feelings in both directions on this.
[00:17:56]  So I don't want you to think I'm just trying to cheat you out of a point and get a sweet pistol.
[00:18:00]  Though I'd like that too.
[00:18:08]  This is a reluctant answer.
[00:18:09]  The reason I almost said yes is the Amish are Anabaptists.
[00:18:17]  Yeah.
[00:18:18]  I mean, second baptism.
[00:18:20]  And I was once debating this with a Protestant friend of mine, and he said, Michael, we're talking about infant baptism, and some people don't like infant baptism, and I think you should be even baptized again as an adult.
[00:18:29]  And he said, well, I'm a Protestant, but I don't think that, because the Holy Spirit acts in baptism, and I think, to take it far, to be provocative, I think it could be a blaspheming of the Holy Spirit to be baptized a second time, because you're denying the efficacy of the first.
[00:18:43]  WE CONFESS ONE BAPTISM FOR THE FORGIVENESS OF SINS.
[00:18:45]  I SAID, WOW, THAT IS SOME HARSH, You know, that is some anti-Anabaptist rhetoric.
[00:18:51]  But the reason that the Amish are not the true enemies of Western civilization is because they are showing an example of a kind of trad life.
[00:19:01]  The horses and buggies, the great wooden furniture, they raise a barn in like three seconds, big families.
[00:19:06]  Oh, that's my biggest thing.
[00:19:08]  It's awesome.
[00:19:09]  No, the best thing about the Amish is they have demonstrated what an absolute sham...
[00:19:16]  I mean, like, a barn goes down in Amish country.
[00:19:20]  It's up the next day.
[00:19:21]  Why?
[00:19:22]  No unions, no permits.
[00:19:23]  It's like Jedediah just comes over with all his buddies.
[00:19:27]  Boom, that thing's back up.
[00:19:29]  I mean, look, there's a lot of reasons to appreciate the Amish, even though I might not agree with them theologically.
[00:19:34]  But are they the primary enemy?
[00:19:36]  No.
[00:19:37]  No, that's the Jehovah's Witness.
[00:19:41]  It's like every time I want to celebrate a birthday party.
[00:19:43]  Right?
[00:19:44]  They come in there and tell me I can't.
[00:19:45]  Never once have I had two Amish people just show up to my door and want to talk to me in the middle of the game.
[00:19:49]  They never want to talk to me.
[00:19:50]  No.
[00:19:57]  It's like you can have a family.
[00:19:59]  You can have nice things.
[00:20:01]  You can dress like a respectable person.
[00:20:04]  It can happen.
[00:20:05]  Yeah.
[00:20:06]  And my daughter's like, and they have horses.
[00:20:08]  Right.
[00:20:09]  She was sold there.
[00:20:10]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:20:10]  She was sold there.
[00:20:11]  Am I being drawn to Amishism?
[00:20:15]  You know, folks, if you want to play this game at home, you can do so by going to dailywire.com slash shop.
[00:20:22]  You can get the yes or no game.
[00:20:24]  You can get the expansion pack, the conspiracy theory expansion pack, the philosophy, politics, and religion expansion pack.

=== Three Days Green Break (08:55) ===

[00:20:31]  If you're feeling saucy, you can get the relationships, the erotic, not erotic, I don't want to overstate it, okay?
[00:20:37]  It's totally wholesome, but it's about, you know, amor.
[00:20:40]  It is time now.
[00:20:43]  Should I warn them that Nick does not come with the game?
[00:20:46]  You have to order him separately.
[00:20:48]  I come with the erotic one.
[00:20:51]  Nick, are you ready for the rapid-fire round?
[00:20:54]  All right, let's do this thing.
[00:20:58]  See that?
[00:20:59]  We even changed the lights.
[00:21:00]  That's how you know it's serious.
[00:21:01]  What about the stakes?
[00:21:02]  There are three questions, 30 seconds, no time to outthink each other.
[00:21:08]  So I read that prompt.
[00:21:09]  You're going to throw down your answer.
[00:21:11]  I'm going to guess.
[00:21:12]  OK.
[00:21:20]  Is it true what they say about the Navy?
[00:21:25]  You would say yes, for sure.
[00:21:26]  Oh yeah, absolutely.
[00:21:27]  No one should put their kids in public school.
[00:21:32]  You would say yes?
[00:21:33]  Yeah, okay.
[00:21:34]  All right.
[00:21:34]  I didn't know if there was something like, well, actually, in this one county, Obviously yes.
[00:21:44]  Yeah.
[00:21:45]  Yeah, without question.
[00:21:46]  Alright.
[00:21:47]  Alright.
[00:21:47]  It's probably not, it's not easier for the first, like, three and a half years of life.
[00:21:53]  But then every day after that, it's got to be much harder, right?
[00:21:56]  Here's the crazy part.
[00:21:56]  Like, my girls were easy the whole way.
[00:21:58]  The thing is, is that for a dad, what constitutes harder is what we worry about more.
[00:22:03]  Yes.
[00:22:04]  And with my son, like, it was just like, oh, you got hurt?
[00:22:09]  Try not being a wuss.
[00:22:10]  What do you want?
[00:22:11]  Be more competent.
[00:22:12]  With my girls, I'm like, oh no, sweet pea, are you okay?
[00:22:16]  And then you have to worry about the boys out there that you might have to kill.
[00:22:24]  Wow, that seems, I don't know.
[00:22:27]  It's kind of like the drinks, though.
[00:22:28]  When you say the boys out there you might have to kill as a father of daughters.
[00:22:32]  Isn't it more like the guys out there you might get to kill?
[00:22:36]  One of my more famous coffee mugs is the hardest part about having daughters is having to bury the bodies.
[00:22:47]  And then it's like, just kidding, it's not that hard.
[00:22:51]  I kind of feel like you've got some really easy ones there.
[00:22:58]  Here we go.
[00:22:59]  Can you be a trad wife?
[00:23:01]  If you're actively on social media.
[00:23:07]  I actually think you would say yes.
[00:23:09]  No!
[00:23:11]  Let's go!
[00:23:13]  Michael would last more than three days in green beret training Michael would last more than three days in green beret training I feel like I can answer this authoritatively on whether or not you could.
[00:23:27]  I think you're going to try to be humble and say no, but I honestly think it's yes.
[00:23:30]  Do you think I could?
[00:23:31]  Yes.
[00:23:32]  I'm happy that I lost that point.
[00:23:33]  Yeah.
[00:23:34]  Because the first three days are more like orientation and paperwork.
[00:23:38]  Just check into your locker.
[00:23:40]  Fluff your pillow.
[00:23:42]  Oh, that's cute.
[00:23:43]  You think we could pillows.
[00:23:44]  This isn't the Navy, Michael.
[00:23:47]  Congressmen should have to smoke a blunt at least once before voting on weed decriminalization.
[00:23:54]  I'm going to say you'd say no on that.
[00:23:56]  I would say no.
[00:23:57]  They should be forced to smoke Mayflower cigars every day at their own cost, regardless of legislation.
[00:24:03]  Wow.
[00:24:04]  Well, I got crushed in that.
[00:24:06]  You did, but the questions were easier for me.
[00:24:08]  Oh, yeah, I figured.
[00:24:09]  Wow.
[00:24:10]  I really wanted a pistol.
[00:24:11]  I, and you think that I could survive the first throw.
[00:24:15]  That's great.
[00:24:16]  That's day one.
[00:24:16]  That's good.
[00:24:17]  All right.
[00:24:17]  That's great.
[00:24:18]  Now, Nick, it is time for the final round.
[00:24:22]  Okay.
[00:24:25]  Now it's time.
[00:24:27]  The prompt will be read.
[00:24:28]  We will both lock in our answers.
[00:24:32]  And then we will move our glasses, the opposite glass, to yes or no, based on how we think the other person would answer.
[00:24:38]  This round is worth double points.
[00:24:40]  It could change everything.
[00:24:44]  Who's winning?
[00:24:45]  You.
[00:24:45]  I am.
[00:24:46]  Let's go.
[00:24:47]  Let's go!
[00:24:48]  Oh, man.
[00:24:48]  I'm going to get the nicest cap gun that Walmart has to offer.
[00:24:51]  This is great.
[00:24:58]  The war in Gaza will end before the war in Ukraine.
[00:25:03]  We have to answer how we would individually answer, then move our cups.
[00:25:09]  Okay.
[00:25:11]  Now hold on.
[00:25:12]  Set up the cups here.
[00:25:13]  Right here on the center?
[00:25:15]  You would say...
[00:25:25]  I know, that's more embarrassing than not having a fistful.
[00:25:29]  But I don't know if you know this, I could survive the first three days of Green Beret training.
[00:25:33]  I heard that somewhere.
[00:25:35]  This is, I just want to show, this is, I am humiliated.
[00:25:39]  Yeah.
[00:25:40]  Nick has actually done the job and had most of the Tennessee mimosa.
[00:25:46]  And me, at this rate, I'm never going to get to my olives, which is the breakfast.
[00:25:51]  So yeah, so we both said, I believe now and I think you would say.
[00:25:55]  For sure.
[00:25:55]  The war in Gaza is going to go on until the apocalypse.
[00:25:57]  Yes.
[00:25:58]  And the war in Ukraine, it'll go on for a while.
[00:26:00]  You know, people have been fighting over Ukraine for like 1,100 years.
[00:26:03]  Sure.
[00:26:03]  But there are periods of peace, I'm sure.
[00:26:06]  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:26:07]  No, no, no.
[00:26:08]  Gaza's not ending until Jesus comes back to tell us all that the Protestants were right.
[00:26:13]  That the Amish were right.
[00:26:14]  Like, wow, the Mennonites, huh?
[00:26:17]  I didn't have that on my card.
[00:26:19]  The Anabaptists.
[00:26:20]  All right, now you're up.
[00:26:21]  Okay, all right.
[00:26:23]  Come on, this isn't even a question.
[00:26:26]  If you have sons, you have an obligation to show them a father who is strong both mentally and physically.
[00:26:33]  Shut up, Davies.
[00:26:34]  I'm sick of this.
[00:26:34]  Every time on this show, Davies makes something.
[00:26:37]  What a freaking, like, here we go.
[00:26:40]  There we go.
[00:26:42]  Yes, you do.
[00:26:43]  And my kids are going to get that because I almost beat my associate producer in an arm wrestle on the air the other day.
[00:26:50]  So take that, Davies.
[00:26:52]  And could potentially survive three days of green break.
[00:26:55]  Three days!
[00:26:55]  That's the bus ride.
[00:26:56]  I mean, not consecutive.
[00:26:57]  Like the first day, the last day of graduation.
[00:26:59]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:27:01]  And maybe you could cobble together 24 hours in the middle.
[00:27:04]  Mostly sleeping.
[00:27:05]  I would say maybe eating.
[00:27:06]  I gotta say, I think it's with the way things are going right now, because you know, every time...
[00:27:15]  I think eventually, Hollywood will agree with that statement.
[00:27:19]  And the bizarre, unique thing for an actress to do in Hollywood will be to walk out their bold and beautiful heteronormative cisgender child with no mental health issues.
[00:27:30]  It's like, we named him John with a J. He's neurotypical.
[00:27:37]  He's so brave.
[00:27:38]  We support him.
[00:27:40]  It's true.
[00:27:41]  Everything old is new again.
[00:27:43]  Nick, I am really pleased.
[00:27:48]  I'm really pleased.
[00:27:49]  I don't want to be a sore winner here, and one might wonder if it was rigged, some of those questions, but I would say my request, I would like a fully Semi-automatic assault weapon that is being produced by every public school in America, handed out to children with their chocolate milk for lunch.
[00:28:14]  The Democrats told me that's the coolest gun to have.
[00:28:16]  I promise you, you will have a weapon of war with a grenade launcher, a flamethrower.
[00:28:23]  I can't wait.
[00:28:24]  Thank you.
[00:28:24]  Nick, good to see you.
[00:28:26]  You as well.
[00:28:27]  So that you don't miss more magnificent content and insightful takes, you need to go follow Nick Freitas on YouTube and Instagram at NickJFreitas.
[00:28:38]  Check out this clip.
[00:28:39]  Here's a little airport fun fact for you.
[00:28:42]  The penalty for having lint in your pockets at an airport security checkpoint is an incredibly thorough and hands-on investigation of anything close to your pockets.
[00:28:51]  Yeah, and say what you want about the tactics.
[00:28:52]  I will never again casually assume that I don't have lint in my pockets.
[00:28:56]  On the bright side, as soon as I get home back to the wife, we're going to play TSA.
[00:29:02]  Oh, and Michael, I was thorough.
[00:29:05]  She looked pretty terrorist-y to me.
[00:29:07]  Ma 'am, look at my mustache.
[00:29:11]  Go check him out.
[00:29:13]  Nick Freitas, YouTube, Instagram, MySpace, AOL Instant Messenger, LiveJournal, Zanga, Usenet.