The Michael Knowles Show - Ben Shapiro Vs Michael Knowles | FACE-OFF: Famous Dead Guys Aired: 2022-02-26 Duration: 41:09 === Deeply Closeted Gay Guy (15:05) === [00:00:00] Welcome to Face-Off. [00:00:01] I am your host, Cabot Phillips. [00:00:03] Today is the time for us to answer a very important question, and that is which Daily Wire host has the most knowledge of quotes from famous dead guys? [00:00:12] And here to help us answer those two very important questions are the man himself, Mr. [00:00:17] Michael Knowles, best-selling author, host of The Michael Knowles Show. [00:00:19] Michael, welcome. [00:00:21] Thank you for having me on my own show, Cabot. [00:00:23] You remind me each time we do this that this is in fact your show. [00:00:26] I'm not the host. [00:00:27] But just let me believe just for a little bit. [00:00:29] And your competitor today in the face-off competition is Mr. [00:00:33] Ben Shapiro, who's, I might add, his best-selling books do actually have words in them. [00:00:37] Ben, thanks for joining us. [00:00:38] You bet. [00:00:39] This is only a lose-lose for me. [00:00:40] I also will point out that it might be a lose-lose for you. [00:00:43] Michael has yet to lose any of these competitions. [00:00:46] He bested Matt Walsh in showing who was the best Daily Wire Catholic. [00:00:50] The better Catholic is, of course, Matt Walsh, but Knowles got more answers right. [00:00:56] All right. [00:00:57] And he bested Dave Rubin in who is the greatest culture warrior. [00:01:00] You know, Michael is a man who's very comfortable with his sexuality. [00:01:04] Yeah. [00:01:05] Michael is coming in on a hot streak. [00:01:07] This is a great point, Cabot, because you would say right now, my loss board is clean. [00:01:13] Naturally, it's clean. [00:01:15] And when you want to clean all of your services, I would recommend that you check out Naturally It's Clean. [00:01:20] More from them later. [00:01:22] First, though, I have got to try to keep up my perfect win streak. [00:01:27] I am now up. [00:01:28] I'm up against the big boss. [00:01:29] This is not, you know, I love Dave and I love Matt. [00:01:32] This is going to be maybe a little more formidable. [00:01:36] Formidable indeed. [00:01:38] So let's just get right to it so you don't get any more nervous than I'm sure you already are. [00:01:42] This is Face-Off: Famous Dead Guys. [00:01:45] The rules of the game are simple. [00:01:51] I will read a quote from a famous dead man. [00:01:53] You two will have 30 seconds. [00:01:55] I'm sure it won't take 30. [00:01:56] You'll have your answers in quicker. [00:01:57] To answer who said that quote, which famous dead man was it, then we will get right to it. [00:02:03] The first quote for you gentlemen today. [00:02:07] I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. [00:02:17] I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. [00:02:21] Oh, wait. [00:02:21] Oh, actually, hold on. [00:02:22] There's more of a story with this one, I think. [00:02:25] There are two correct answers that we will take for this one, because there is a little bit of dispute on who exactly this belongs to. [00:02:32] All right, Michael, you're finished. [00:02:33] Ben, we'll start with you, because you got yours in first. [00:02:40] Supposedly Voltaire... [00:02:42] Michael, who are you going with? [00:02:43] So I put the little second caveat one down there, but I did put Voltaire up first. [00:02:49] It's a little tricky when you name Voltaire these days, because a GOP congressman just got in trouble for confusing a quote from a neo-Nazi pedophile with a quote from Voltaire, but I'll stick with the first one, supposedly Voltaire. [00:03:03] You were both correct. [00:03:05] We would have accepted Voltaire or Evelyn Beatrice Hall. [00:03:08] There was some dispute still on that. [00:03:11] Probably getting misquoted by a lot of people. [00:03:14] Not by you, gentlemen. [00:03:15] Well done. [00:03:16] One point to each. [00:03:18] Next up. [00:03:19] By all means, marry. [00:03:21] If you get a good wife, you'll become happy. [00:03:23] If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. [00:03:26] Ben's got his in, Michael. [00:03:33] Okay. [00:03:33] Alright, Michael, you're gonna go first on this one. [00:03:36] Who you got? [00:03:36] I guessed Aristotle, not because I've heard Aristotle say that or read it, but because all those old Greeks were gay guys, and so I figured if they had an unhappy marriage, that would be more likely for them. [00:03:50] Ben, what about you? [00:03:51] Yeah. [00:03:53] I went with Samuel Johnson, mainly because it kind of sounds like Samuel Johnson. [00:03:58] Uh, Michael was closer on this one. [00:04:00] This one was actually Socrates. [00:04:02] Really? [00:04:03] That is what the producers are telling me. [00:04:05] Wow, that's shocking. [00:04:05] So if not, take it up with your producers, Michael, if you think that was incorrect. [00:04:08] I almost wrote Socrates, but I thought Aristotle was the funnier gay guy. [00:04:12] Joke. [00:04:13] But that, well, okay. [00:04:13] Do I get points for that? [00:04:14] I don't know. [00:04:14] That was pretty close. [00:04:16] No. [00:04:16] Even though it is your show, we're not going to get points for this. [00:04:18] Sadly, no. [00:04:18] What? [00:04:19] Ah, darn. [00:04:19] I should have put Socrates. [00:04:20] That would have been funnier. [00:04:21] Okay. [00:04:22] Next up. [00:04:24] With great power comes great responsibility. [00:04:27] Hmm. [00:04:28] Ben's taking a little more time than you, so maybe easy for you, Michael. [00:04:38] Ben, we'll start with you. [00:04:39] Walk us through the thought process. [00:04:40] I saw some deep thinking going on. [00:04:42] Well, I mean, it depends where you are in the multiverse as to who says this, right? [00:04:47] Because Uncle Ben says this to Peter Parker, or alternatively, Marissa Tomei says it to Peter Parker. [00:04:55] All right, very thorough. [00:04:56] Michael, what you got? [00:04:57] I, uh... [00:05:00] I'm not as much of a nerd on these things. [00:05:03] I just said Spider-Man. [00:05:04] Does that count? [00:05:06] No, that's incorrect. [00:05:07] I do not think we're going to give you points on that for Spider-Man. [00:05:11] Also, I would just like to point out at this point, you're not a nerd for enjoying the most popular movie in the world, Michael. [00:05:17] You don't have to play that game. [00:05:18] I'm just a nerd. [00:05:19] Oh, no. [00:05:20] Ben, you get points for that. [00:05:22] We also would have accepted Uncle Ben, Winston Churchill, Stan Lee, or the Apostle Luke, who said to whom much is given, much is expected. [00:05:30] Any of those we would have technically taken. [00:05:33] Spider-Man does not count, unfortunately. [00:05:36] Fair enough. [00:05:37] Next up. [00:05:38] I can calculate the motion of heavenly bodies, but not the madness of people. [00:05:44] Hmm. [00:05:46] Hmm. [00:05:50] Alright, Michael, we'll start with you. [00:05:51] Who you got? [00:05:53] I'm shooting in the dark here, as was this man. [00:05:57] Galileo? [00:05:58] Alright, Ben? [00:06:01] I also said Galileo, but I'm with Michael. [00:06:05] It could be like three other guys. [00:06:06] I want to say very close. [00:06:09] Generally close. [00:06:10] It was Sir Isaac Newton. [00:06:11] Newton. [00:06:12] Yeah, okay. [00:06:13] He was the other guy, I was thinking. [00:06:15] Yep, me too. [00:06:16] Alright, so no points awarded there. [00:06:18] Next up. [00:06:19] Let my teaching fall like rain, and my words descend like dew. [00:06:23] Like showers on new grass, like abundant rain on tender plants. [00:06:29] Let my teaching fall like rain, and my words descend like dew. [00:06:33] Uh Ben is just rearing to hold up the whiteboards. [00:06:39] We're gonna go to him He looks very confident. [00:06:45] I'm going to go with my boy Moses. [00:06:48] All right, Michael? [00:06:49] From Deuteronomy. [00:06:50] Oh, darn. [00:06:51] I wanted it to be more mystical, so I suggested Confucius. [00:06:58] Mr. [00:06:59] Shapiro gets the points on this one. [00:07:02] Devastating. [00:07:02] That's my book, Michael, Michael. [00:07:04] Yeah, you're in my backyard with that one. [00:07:05] That's brutal. [00:07:06] You know, I'm doing Bible in a year. [00:07:07] I can almost cite that one in the original Hebrew. [00:07:09] I can almost cite that one in the original Hebrew. [00:07:11] I always start Bible in a year. [00:07:13] So I've read Genesis about a thousand times. [00:07:16] But I'm not yet up again to Deuteronomy. [00:07:20] I'm still on Exodus. [00:07:24] Many a Bible reading plan has died on the shores of Deuteronomy. [00:07:28] Next up. [00:07:29] No, it all falls apart in Leviticus. [00:07:31] Deuteronomy is great. [00:07:33] I actually may have gotten that wrong. [00:07:34] Next up. [00:07:35] This one, again, this is a quote from someone else. [00:07:38] I am a deeply closeted gay guy. [00:07:41] You can't say Socrates again. [00:07:49] Hmm I'll read it one more time for the sake of reminding I am a deeply closeted gay guy Can't make the Socrates joke, you already did that. [00:08:03] Man. [00:08:05] I'm having a real tough time with this one, I'll be honest with you. [00:08:08] Ah. [00:08:09] Hmm. [00:08:10] Slightly more recent. [00:08:11] There's so many jokes and I can't pick between them! [00:08:13] I can't pick between them! [00:08:14] What do we do? [00:08:16] I don't know. [00:08:17] Okay, we'll do this. [00:08:18] Would it help if I read the quote one more time? [00:08:21] One more time, Gavin. [00:08:23] Alright, fine. [00:08:24] Alright, Michael, who'd you go with? [00:08:26] Ben might know how to quote Moses, but I know how to quote Norm MacDonald. [00:08:34] Ben? [00:08:36] Oh, I had Rock Hudson, so... [00:08:38] Norm MacDonald was, in fact, his self-described deeply closeted gay man. [00:08:45] I'm a deeply closeted gay man. [00:08:47] You're a gay man? [00:08:48] I'm not gay! [00:08:51] I said I'm deeply closeted. [00:08:53] Point to Mr. [00:08:53] Knowles. [00:08:54] So you're saying he was a gay guy? [00:08:56] Well, I said he ascribed himself. [00:08:58] No, he said deeply closeted. [00:08:59] Deeply closeted, yes. [00:09:01] I'm hoping our producers are keeping score in my ear because I'm just kind of throwing out points left and right. [00:09:06] Next up. [00:09:07] I'm up 3-2. [00:09:08] I'm up 3-2. [00:09:09] Yeah, I think Ben's up by one. [00:09:10] Keep going. [00:09:10] Of course Ben was counting. [00:09:12] Yep. [00:09:12] Next up. [00:09:13] History repeats itself first as tragedy, second as farce. [00:09:17] Ben, who you got? [00:09:31] I had Nietzsche, but I think it's wrong. [00:09:33] Michael? [00:09:34] I believe it is Marks and Engels. [00:09:37] And the reason I say Marks and Engels is I think Engels actually said it first. [00:09:41] We've got Karl Marx, so we are going to give you the point on that, unless Ben can make a compelling argument otherwise. [00:09:47] No, I cannot. [00:09:48] I cannot make a compelling argument. [00:09:49] That's okay. [00:09:50] I mean, that's the first time I've ever heard Ben say that. [00:09:52] That saddens me that I didn't get that. [00:09:53] That is a blown opportunity. [00:09:55] I mean, in fairness, it just means that you haven't been keeping up on your Marx, which probably is for the betterment of your soul. [00:10:04] He has been keeping up on his Old Testament though, which is true for the betterment of his soul as well. [00:10:09] Next up. [00:10:09] More important. [00:10:10] Yeah, exactly. [00:10:11] Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. [00:10:14] it is wholly inadequate to the government of any other. [00:10:18] Who we got? [00:10:25] I'm going to say that it is the man who conservatives quote 50,000 times a day with that exact line, John Adams. [00:10:34] Point to both of you. [00:10:36] Well done. [00:10:36] There was never any question there for either of you. [00:10:38] There was no suspense. [00:10:39] I don't want to build suspense where there is none. [00:10:41] No, that was an easy one. [00:10:42] We'll move on to the next. [00:10:44] Politics is the ability to foretell... [00:10:46] Quote some Locke and Knowles is in trouble. [00:10:51] Politics is the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. [00:10:57] And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen. [00:11:04] A little more suspense here. [00:11:06] Ben, what do you got? [00:11:07] Yeah. [00:11:09] I had Churchill, but this is another one where I'm just not sure. [00:11:12] I went with a different Marx. [00:11:14] I went with Groucho Marx on this one. [00:11:18] That is incorrect, but Ben does get a point. [00:11:21] It was Churchill. [00:11:22] That's awful. [00:11:24] I'm back in the red. [00:11:28] If my eyes could show my soul, everyone would cry when they saw me smile. [00:11:34] Again, if my mother is watching this, it's not a cry for help. [00:11:36] That is a quote from a famous dead guy. [00:11:42] Michael, we'll start with you. [00:11:44] I'm going with the Marquis de Sade. [00:11:50] There's one person who's going to laugh at that joke, and that would happen to be Ben Shapiro. [00:11:54] Everyone answer? [00:11:55] It's okay. [00:11:55] Yeah. [00:11:57] Ben, who do you got? [00:11:58] That is true. [00:11:59] Well, actually, Clayton would have laughed at that joke. [00:12:02] Okay. [00:12:04] And I have Proust, mainly because I have not, nor will I ever read Proust. [00:12:10] This was a little bit of a trick question. [00:12:12] It was actually Kurt Cobain. [00:12:14] Oh, Kurt Cobain. [00:12:15] Got it. [00:12:16] I was much closer than you. [00:12:18] Actually, was I that much? [00:12:19] Oh, yeah. [00:12:19] Up for debate. [00:12:21] On second thought, yeah. [00:12:24] Next up. [00:12:24] "To write well, express yourself like the common people, but think like a wise man." Michael, you're so confident. [00:12:38] Let's let you go first. [00:12:39] Obviously. [00:12:39] Who does this describe? [00:12:41] Donald Trump. [00:12:43] There's no question. [00:12:44] Next one. [00:12:45] Next question. [00:12:47] Ben, what do you make of that and what did you answer? [00:12:50] I went with his ancients equivalent. [00:12:54] Plato. [00:12:54] Ben was much closer. [00:12:56] It was actually Aristotle. [00:12:57] We keep dancing around the old Greeks. [00:13:00] I know. [00:13:00] Ah, we keep dancing. [00:13:01] Yeah. [00:13:02] Wrong Greeks, man. [00:13:03] I think Donald Trump would be very flattered by that, Michael. [00:13:06] Or maybe he wouldn't be flattered. [00:13:10] Who knows? [00:13:11] We'll find out on Twitter. [00:13:12] One of our producers came up with a friendly reminder just now that Trump is not dead, so you're forgetting the premise of the game, Michael. [00:13:20] That's true. [00:13:21] Ineligible. [00:13:22] That's a good point. [00:13:24] Next up... [00:13:25] But Joe Biden is eligible, so that's good news. [00:13:30] Next up... [00:13:32] I cannot help it. [00:13:33] I want to be a good Catholic, but I'm a hedonist. [00:13:37] Hmm... [00:13:39] I will be very impressed. [00:13:40] No fair writing Martin Luther, Michael. [00:13:42] I know. [00:13:44] I cannot help it. [00:13:46] I want to be a good Catholic, but I am a hedonist. [00:13:52] This is another shot in the dark. [00:13:55] Ben, who are we putting down here? [00:13:57] Well, it's wrong, but it's true. [00:14:03] Several popes in the Middle Ages. [00:14:08] Several. [00:14:08] Hey, that's certainly an understatement. [00:14:11] That's certainly undercounting. [00:14:13] Michael? [00:14:14] I put down... [00:14:16] And this is just because he was a hedonist and he gets quoted a lot. [00:14:21] Oscar Wilde? [00:14:23] I do appreciate both of your answers. [00:14:26] We're putting the man who lived down by the river, Mr. [00:14:29] Chris Farley. [00:14:30] Mmm. [00:14:31] Mmm. [00:14:33] Wow. [00:14:33] Yeah, I was not going to get that. [00:14:35] And they're really testing y'all's knowledge here. [00:14:37] Wow, yeah. [00:14:38] I really like what this game... [00:14:40] That was out of the box. [00:14:40] I like that the producers chose quotes that are not in any way well-known. [00:14:46] That's great. [00:14:46] I'm glad they did that. [00:14:48] Right. [00:14:48] That's the best part, is they just sort of randomly opened books. === A Man's Rational Choice (02:26) === [00:14:51] And it was like, they had a book on their shelf, and it was like Chris Farley's autobiography. [00:14:56] Yeah. [00:14:56] And then they just picked a random sentence, and they're like, okay, we'll put this one out there. [00:14:58] This is a quote. [00:14:59] Yeah. [00:15:01] I would like to take credit for any quotes you guys like and get correct, and any that you've never heard of. [00:15:05] That was the producers, they put those in. [00:15:06] And we will move on. [00:15:08] A man has free choice to the extent that he is rational. [00:15:15] Are there repeats? [00:15:17] There are not. [00:15:20] You may offer repeat answers, but there are not repeat correct answers. [00:15:26] A man has free choice to the extent that he is rational. [00:15:29] Mr. [00:15:30] Shapiro, who said that? [00:15:33] I'm going to say Descartes. [00:15:36] Knowles? [00:15:36] I wanted to go a little more old school. [00:15:39] I suggested St. [00:15:40] Thomas Aquinas. [00:15:41] Very impressive. [00:15:42] Michael Knowles, that is correct. [00:15:44] Hey, alright! [00:15:45] There are too many Catholics on this list. [00:15:47] This is not... [00:15:49] This is not okay. [00:15:50] It was one of those... [00:15:51] Only one Jew and many Catholics. [00:15:52] You know, all of the Enlightenment guys, they liked rationalism a lot, too. [00:15:58] But people forget those old-school medieval scholastics. [00:16:01] They liked their reason. [00:16:02] All right. [00:16:03] So is this tied? [00:16:03] It's tied now? [00:16:04] Yes, we are tied. [00:16:07] Oh, man. [00:16:08] It was intense. [00:16:09] Okay. [00:16:09] I have high hopes for both of you guys on this one. [00:16:12] Every man has a property in his own person. [00:16:16] This nobody has a right to but himself. [00:16:19] Hmm, sounds like some kind of, like, some kind of, like, lib stuff. [00:16:23] Hold on. [00:16:27] This is definitely not St. [00:16:28] Thomas Aquinas. [00:16:29] Uh, trying to see how many letters Ben is writing there. [00:16:34] Mmm, uh... [00:16:36] Mmm. [00:16:37] Michael, are you done? [00:16:42] Yeah, like, sure, whatever. [00:16:44] I'm so divided here. [00:16:45] Let's hear it. [00:16:46] I'm so divided. [00:16:49] Locke? [00:16:49] I don't know. [00:16:50] Is it Locke? [00:16:52] Ben? [00:16:52] I also said Locke. [00:16:54] And you also are correct. [00:16:56] You're both right. [00:16:56] John Locke. [00:16:57] Wow. [00:16:58] Oh, man. [00:16:59] I was literally looking. [00:17:00] I was like, did Ben write five letters? === Naturally Clean Product (03:07) === [00:17:03] Did he write five letters or only four? [00:17:05] Do you feel lucky, punk? [00:17:06] Yeah, exactly. [00:17:08] There was no luck. [00:17:09] That was all skill. [00:17:10] Just like your skill, Michael, at reading some fantastic ads. [00:17:14] And I believe that you have a great ad that we need to hear about. [00:17:16] Thank you very much. [00:17:17] That was a pretty clean segue, Cabot. [00:17:19] And when you want to clean all your countertops, all your surfaces, all your carpets, all everything, you have got to check out my absolute favorite cleaning product ever. [00:17:28] Naturally, it's clean. [00:17:30] When you bring a product into your home, you want to be sure that your hard-earned money is going to a brand that believes in the same kind of principles that you do. [00:17:38] You don't want it going to a brand that hates your guts. [00:17:40] We're talking about a brand that values personal and environmental responsibility and, more importantly, your freedom. 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[00:18:28] Visit naturallyitsclean.com slash Michael. [00:18:30] Use promo code Michael to receive 15% off your order. [00:18:32] Cleaning products are expensive if you keep a clean home. [00:18:35] You're going to go through them fast. [00:18:36] We encourage our listeners to keep a clean home and support companies like Naturally It's Clean while you do it. [00:18:42] They support your conservative values. [00:18:44] Check them out today. [00:18:45] Get your Daily Wire Essentials kit at naturallyitsclean.com slash Michael. [00:18:50] One thing that's not clean are some of these quotes that I have been given to read. [00:18:55] Mainly this next one. [00:18:56] Again, these are not my words. [00:18:59] I love it when you call me Big Papa. [00:19:01] Mm-hmm. [00:19:05] I will add also that Papa is P-O-P-P-A. If that is helpful at all. [00:19:10] Oh, okay. [00:19:11] I love it when you call me Big Papa. [00:19:13] This sounds like right in my wheelhouse. [00:19:14] Right here. [00:19:18] I think I'm ready. [00:19:20] Alright, Ben. [00:19:20] Let's see who you got. [00:19:24] Biggie. [00:19:27] Smokin' Blunts was a daily routine since 13. [00:19:31] A chubby fella on the scene by the name of Biggie Smalls. [00:19:35] Both very well done, gentlemen. [00:19:37] I would say you guys know your music. [00:19:40] Wow! [00:19:40] I pulled that one. [00:19:41] I did not expect to get that one right. [00:19:42] I got Locke and you got Biggie. [00:19:44] That is well outside my wheelhouse. [00:19:45] This is impressive. [00:19:46] Now, Ben, is Biggie a musical artist or is he a poet? [00:19:51] What do we consider him? [00:19:53] I assumed it was his given name. === Proverbs Puzzle (15:25) === [00:19:55] Yeah. [00:19:56] That his mother, he came out of his mother and she said, Behold, I shall call him Begin. [00:20:03] Moving on. [00:20:05] Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. [00:20:13] Michael, who'd you put? [00:20:15] I don't know, like Shakespeare. [00:20:20] I'm surprised by that one. [00:20:21] Ben. [00:20:21] Ben. [00:20:24] I said John Stuart Mill. [00:20:26] That is actually Solomon. [00:20:28] King Solomon. [00:20:29] King Solomon. [00:20:30] Oh. [00:20:31] I should have known that one. [00:20:32] Well, that's... [00:20:32] I mean, since Shakespeare probably wrote the KJ. They nailed you with Proverbs. [00:20:36] Proverbs 2017. [00:20:37] Proverbs. [00:20:38] Or 2717, I should have known. [00:20:39] Proverbs is so difficult to read, man. [00:20:42] In Hebrew, it's Mishle, and it is rough to read. [00:20:45] It has so many great quotes, but they're all juxtaposed with one another in bizarre order, and so there's no through line. [00:20:52] So everybody knows three quotes from Proverbs, but nobody actually knows how they fit together. [00:20:58] Proverbs is also one where I guess I could probably tell you a bunch of it, but I could never tell you where it is, or the numbers, or really anything. [00:21:08] It's all just kind of like a... [00:21:09] Yeah, that's right. [00:21:10] I smell a new show, like an Old Testament survey course taught by you two. [00:21:16] Ratings would be through the roof. [00:21:18] That's what the youths are after these days. [00:21:23] I would rather be stricken blind than to live without expression of mind. [00:21:29] I would rather be stricken blind than to live without expression of mind. [00:21:33] Ben. [00:21:36] Keats, because it rhymes. [00:21:39] Knowles. [00:21:40] I said Shakespeare because it rhymes. [00:21:43] And one of these has to be Shakespeare, right? [00:21:45] I mean, a Shakespeare of the 20th century. [00:21:48] This was Mr. [00:21:49] Tupac Shakur. [00:21:50] Damn, I almost wrote Tupac as a joke. [00:21:54] That's frustrating. [00:21:55] See, this has been actually accidentally giving credit to Tupac for being a brilliant lyricist. [00:22:00] It is. [00:22:01] It is. [00:22:01] He is the modern day Keats. [00:22:04] That's exactly right. [00:22:07] Next up, you were not made to live like brute beasts, but to pursue virtue and knowledge. [00:22:12] We've got a standoff. [00:22:18] I think they're both looking at the camera to see how many letters are being written by the other. [00:22:25] Michael, who'd you put? [00:22:27] Okay. [00:22:29] St. [00:22:30] Augustine. [00:22:31] Sounds kind of Augustinian. [00:22:33] Ben? [00:22:35] I also thought about Augustine, but we actually have not hit Plato yet, right? [00:22:38] We got Aristotle, who actually was correct, but we haven't actually gotten... [00:22:41] This was a tough one. [00:22:42] This was actually Dante. [00:22:44] Dante, really? [00:22:46] Yes! [00:22:46] Oh! [00:22:47] You've read him in the original Italian. [00:22:48] That's why he didn't recognize it. [00:22:49] Yeah, that's true. [00:22:50] Yeah, I'm not familiar with him. [00:22:51] If he was an Italian, he would have been good. [00:22:53] If... [00:22:53] You were not made to live, like, pursue virtue and knowledge. [00:22:56] I guess I, like, vaguely... [00:22:57] Yeah, all right, well. [00:22:59] Ah, darn, now I... Ah, man, I was really hoping to have an advantage on the Dante quote. [00:23:03] This whole thing is like the seventh circle of hell. [00:23:06] Do we have a score update? [00:23:08] Ben, are you still keeping score, producers? [00:23:10] What's the score right now? [00:23:11] No, I lost it a while ago. [00:23:12] I think I'm behind. [00:23:13] I think it's even right now. [00:23:14] It is. [00:23:15] What is it? [00:23:15] I don't know. [00:23:17] 7-7. [00:23:18] We've got a tie ball game heading into this final stretch. [00:23:21] It's been even for a while. [00:23:22] None of us have gotten one right in a long stretch here. [00:23:25] Next up. [00:23:27] We must reject the idea that every time a law is broken, society is guilty rather than the lawbreaker. [00:23:32] It is time to restore the American precept that each individual is accountable for his actions. [00:23:41] There are like four people I'm thinking of right now. [00:23:44] This was another tough one. [00:23:45] This was one of the more... [00:23:46] maybe unpopular of this person's. [00:23:54] Michael, who'd you guess? [00:23:55] Oh, okay. [00:23:55] Oh, wait, wait, wait. [00:23:57] Hold on. [00:23:57] He gave a clue. [00:23:59] That's some Bushley. [00:24:00] Yeah, he gave a clue. [00:24:01] Right there. [00:24:02] I thought the answers were final. [00:24:04] Oh, wait. [00:24:05] My conscience is clear. [00:24:06] I can't see that either. [00:24:07] That guy's still alive. [00:24:08] Hold on. [00:24:09] Here we go. [00:24:10] Oh, I know who you were thinking of for that one. [00:24:12] Yeah, you do, don't you? [00:24:16] Let's see. [00:24:17] You know what's funny? [00:24:17] That guy's alive, too. [00:24:18] I was thinking of him, too, and I also forgot that he was still alive. [00:24:22] Yep. [00:24:23] How do you both know who the other is talking about by being this vague? [00:24:26] We're a little bit on a wavelength right here, Cabot. [00:24:29] And that wavelength is hopping over the center of this screen. [00:24:32] All right, can we do it now? [00:24:35] Can we show this? [00:24:36] Yes, you can. [00:24:36] All right, okay fine. [00:24:37] What do you have? [00:24:38] I think it was Reagan. [00:24:40] Ben? [00:24:43] I had written Reagan, but then I changed it to LBJ because Cabot suggested it was surprising. [00:24:47] You always gotta trust your gut, Ben. [00:24:49] This was Reagan. [00:24:50] Yes. [00:24:51] Oh, you cheated me. [00:24:53] I literally wrote Ronaldus Maximus, and then I erased it because you wouldn't shut your face, Cabot. [00:24:57] Oh, that's such... [00:24:58] Never be led astray by the host. [00:24:59] Oh, man. [00:25:00] How did I lead you astray? [00:25:02] God bless it. [00:25:02] That's like... [00:25:03] Wow. [00:25:04] You said this was one of his less popular stances. [00:25:06] Are you kidding? [00:25:07] That's what won Ronald Reagan the presidency. [00:25:10] When you said it's one of his less popular stances, I immediately assumed that it was somebody of the left. [00:25:13] Did you mean a less popular quote? [00:25:15] I meant a less popular quote of his, where if people are quoting Ronald Reagan, typically that's not the one they're quoting. [00:25:22] You're like, The real reason I do this is because Michael is actually three doors down from me. [00:25:30] Ben, you are three states down from me, so I'm more scared of one than the other. [00:25:34] That's true. [00:25:34] Now, the difference is I don't sign the paychecks. [00:25:38] I may have miscalculated this. [00:25:39] I told you this was a lose-lose. [00:25:40] I would both lose to Michael and continue to sign him paychecks. [00:25:43] And now sign a paycheck to a corrupt host who's been bought off by the sweater vest wearing jackass down the hall from him. [00:25:51] Man, I was so going to complain if Ben went from the wrong answer to the right answer on that, but now, that's the way the rules work? [00:25:58] That's fine. [00:25:58] Okay, we're good. [00:25:59] I was led astray. [00:26:00] The proverbial cookie has crumbled. [00:26:02] Watch the tape, go back, and you can see my hand move as I write Ronald as Maximus and then erase the answer. [00:26:09] Oh, well. [00:26:09] Okay. [00:26:10] I'm going to move on before I actually do get fired. [00:26:12] Always do sober what you said you would do drunk. [00:26:15] That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. [00:26:19] Always do sober what you said you would do drunk. [00:26:22] That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. [00:26:23] and I'm gonna keep my mouth shut and not offer any clues. [00:26:26] I really do. [00:26:33] Yeah, I... Looks like we got our answers in. [00:26:39] Hold on. [00:26:42] Ben, I did not give him a clue. [00:26:43] He is erasing this of his own will and volition. [00:26:45] I know, I know. [00:26:46] That wasn't you. [00:26:47] That wasn't you. [00:26:48] Okay. [00:26:48] All right. [00:26:49] I'm so frustrated. [00:26:50] Michael, who'd you switch to? [00:26:52] So initially I said George Burns because I could kind of picture the quote with him smoking a cigar or whatever. [00:26:57] But I changed it to Chesterton because I assume Chesterton's going to show up at some point since he produced half of the quotes in the English language. [00:27:04] Ben? [00:27:06] I said Al Capone. [00:27:08] I wish I could give that half point. [00:27:10] This was actually Hemingway. [00:27:12] Hemingway. [00:27:13] Okay, that's fair enough. [00:27:14] He never took the advice, but yeah, that's good to know that he at least understood. [00:27:18] Well, I mean, he had no choice. [00:27:21] He was always drunk. [00:27:21] That's true. [00:27:23] He never had to do anything. [00:27:25] Yep, that's true. [00:27:26] Next up is the shortest quote of our list. [00:27:29] It is simply, hee hee. [00:27:33] H-E-E. What was it? [00:27:36] H-E-E. H-E-E. Hee hee. [00:27:40] I'll read in a different tone. [00:27:43] Hee hee. [00:27:48] That's it. [00:27:49] That's the quote. [00:27:50] Could you keep saying it, Cabot? [00:27:53] No, I'm a little worried about what that might evoke in the comment section, so I'm not going to do any more of those. [00:28:00] But do we have any guesses? [00:28:01] Ben, we'll start with you. [00:28:05] The Joker. [00:28:06] Close. [00:28:08] Pretty close. [00:28:09] I'm going to say... [00:28:10] Shimona! [00:28:12] Michael Jackson. [00:28:13] It is Mr. [00:28:14] Michael Jackson. [00:28:16] Yep. [00:28:18] Thank you. [00:28:19] I didn't know at first, but the read really helped, Cabot. [00:28:23] That one goes to the appellate court. [00:28:25] I'm sorry. [00:28:25] That is the thing that the Joker also says. [00:28:27] That is not... [00:28:29] Michael, you won that, but really everyone lost for having to hear me say hee-hee repeatedly. [00:28:34] Yeah, that's true. [00:28:36] The most effective way to destroy people is to deny and obliterate their own understanding of their history. [00:28:41] Ben is writing a paragraph over there. [00:28:52] I gotta see this. [00:28:52] Ben, what'd you put? [00:28:55] Nicole Hannah-Jones. [00:28:56] And it's a playbook, not a... [00:28:58] It's prescriptive, actually. [00:29:00] Right, actually. [00:29:02] I, having never read... [00:29:05] Almost anything this man has written, I decided to say Solzhenitsyn because I could hear Jordan Peterson quoting that as a quote from Solzhenitsyn. [00:29:16] Is this just you wanting to show to everyone that you know how to spell Solzhenitsyn? [00:29:20] That was a stab in the dark, too. [00:29:22] That was definitely, probably some vowels out of place. [00:29:24] This was actually George Orwell. [00:29:26] Orwell, yeah, okay. [00:29:28] Oh. [00:29:28] Fair enough. [00:29:29] Considering I had that book club on him last month, that's it, that's it. [00:29:33] The great part about being a host, which I'm learning that you guys must get to feel every day, is the feeling of superiority because I get to pretend like I already knew the answer to all of these things when in reality the producers are just telling me in my ear. [00:29:45] So it's a nice feeling. [00:29:47] Next quote. [00:29:48] Lies, damned lies, and statistics. [00:29:53] They're not giving you guys a lot of context here. [00:29:55] They're just giving you those five words. [00:29:57] I mean, it's been quoted by... [00:30:00] Zillions of people. [00:30:01] Everyone. [00:30:02] Yeah. [00:30:02] Every human. [00:30:03] Yeah. [00:30:05] Michael? [00:30:07] Mark Twain? [00:30:09] And Ben? [00:30:10] Yeah, he's correct. [00:30:11] That's right. [00:30:12] I put Disraeli, but it is Twain. [00:30:14] We've got Mark Twain on here, so Michael, we'll give you another point there. [00:30:17] Disraeli, though. [00:30:18] I wonder if... [00:30:18] Disraeli's got some good quotes, too. [00:30:21] That's a good one to throw in the noggin if he might show up in the rest of this game. [00:30:25] I'm blowing this, man. [00:30:26] This month's book is Adventures of Huck Finn. [00:30:28] Really? [00:30:29] I'm blowing it. [00:30:30] Yeah, I'm completely blowing it. [00:30:32] I'll admit that it's not in Huck Finn, though. [00:30:34] Brevity. [00:30:37] Michael's now running away with this thing. [00:30:39] Michael is running away with this thing. [00:30:40] I've got a little bit of a lead here. [00:30:41] I didn't want to give a score update because I didn't want to appear to be rubbing it in. [00:30:45] Yeah, it's like 10-7 or something. [00:30:46] It got brutal here. [00:30:47] Maybe, Ben, I'll remind you of what's at stake and this will motivate a comeback. [00:30:51] You will have to film and record a plug on your own show to listen to Michael's show if you lose. [00:30:57] And vice versa. [00:30:58] So just a reminder, what's at stake? [00:31:02] To be frank, I do that pretty much every day and it never helps. [00:31:06] So we'll just keep doing it. [00:31:07] It never helps and it always hurts. [00:31:09] It always just digs right into your... [00:31:10] Okay. [00:31:11] Well, if you don't want to give it to Michael, you can just plug Morning Wire and we'll call it even on that. [00:31:15] And that's... [00:31:16] What do you think I did this morning? [00:31:18] All right. [00:31:19] Anyway. [00:31:19] Next up. [00:31:21] Brevity is the soul of wit. [00:31:26] Oh, there we go. [00:31:28] Michael, it's all you, man. [00:31:29] You've been waiting for this one. [00:31:30] I've been waiting for this one. [00:31:31] It's kind of a trick. [00:31:33] It's kind of a trick question. [00:31:35] Why is that? [00:31:36] And explain your answer. [00:31:36] Let's see it, Michael. [00:31:38] Well, I actually have to write it down, though, like the real one that I'm going to get credit for. [00:31:41] Okay. [00:31:42] It's really, you know, everyone says it's Shakespeare, but it's really, really Polonius who says it. [00:31:47] His character in Hamlet. [00:31:49] Mmm. [00:31:50] Yeah. [00:31:51] Do I get bonus points? [00:31:52] As clearly neither of you were surprised. [00:31:54] Well done. [00:31:55] Yep. [00:31:57] Next up. [00:31:58] In individuals, insanity is rare, but in groups, parties, nations, in epochs, it is the rule. [00:32:06] Do we say epochs, epochs, epochs? [00:32:09] What do we say there? [00:32:11] I say epoch. [00:32:13] But I don't know. [00:32:15] Some say Tupac. [00:32:17] Exactly. [00:32:19] Do we have an answer here? [00:32:19] Can you read the quote again, Kevin? [00:32:20] I'll read it again. [00:32:21] In individuals, insanity is rare, but in groups, parties, nations, and epochs, it is the rule. [00:32:31] Ben, you've got a smile. [00:32:32] Let's see it. [00:32:34] Well, I mean, I'm just going to crib off of Michael here and I'm going to say Solzhenitsyn this time. [00:32:38] I too said Solzhenitsyn this time. [00:32:40] I sort of thought it might be Spengler, but then I thought, I was like, there's no way they looked up Spengler. [00:32:44] Yeah, there's no way they're quoting Spengler. [00:32:45] No way. [00:32:46] Or Toynbee or something. [00:32:47] Yeah, no way. [00:32:47] This one was Nietzsche. [00:32:49] Nietzsche! [00:32:49] I was like, I thought it sounded too lucid to be Nietzsche. [00:32:52] Should have gotten that. [00:32:53] Should have gotten that. [00:32:54] I know. [00:32:54] As soon as you mentioned madness, two out of three shot, it's a Nietzsche quote. [00:32:57] Yeah, it's true. [00:32:59] It was just, it was somewhat understandable, which is why I assumed there was no way it could be Nietzsche, but okay. [00:33:05] Okay. [00:33:06] Ben, you're going to have to make a comeback here. [00:33:08] You've got four quotes left to mount a seemingly insurmountable. [00:33:12] At least we'll be done. [00:33:15] Quote, as the family goes, so goes the nation, and so goes the whole world in which we live. [00:33:21] Doesn't that sound nice? [00:33:23] As the family goes, so goes the nation, and so goes the whole world in which we live. [00:33:28] Man, I have heard this quote. [00:33:31] This is incorrect, but I'm just going to write it anyway, because whatever, man. [00:33:34] It's over. [00:33:36] Alright, I'm just going to... [00:33:38] It should have been this guy, but it isn't. [00:33:40] Michael, we'll start with you. [00:33:42] I'm still stabbing at my Chesterton. [00:33:45] It's not Chesterton, because it's not funny enough. [00:33:48] Ben? [00:33:51] Daniel Patrick Moynihan. [00:33:53] This was Pope John Paul II. Pope John Paul II. Oh, yeah, he was a good pope. [00:33:59] I like that pope. [00:34:01] This one. [00:34:02] Well, which one, though, is the real question. [00:34:05] When they say this one, people say which one. [00:34:07] Okay, all right. [00:34:08] I should have gotten that one. [00:34:10] Everyone thinks of changing the world. [00:34:11] This one's like the family of animals is... [00:34:13] This one's like the family of trees is the foundation of... [00:34:20] I'll give you 30 seconds if you want the floor just to bash the Pope. [00:34:23] I mean, that's... [00:34:23] Absolutely, that would be... [00:34:24] Oh, I mean, I think we're all on board with this. [00:34:26] No, you know how the Catholics do it, though. [00:34:28] Because you have to be obedient, so you're like, well, you know, I just think it might be, like, in a very respectful... [00:34:33] You might be preaching a heresy, Papa Francesco. [00:34:36] But you gotta do it, like, really nice, you know? [00:34:38] It was all mistranslated. [00:34:39] It's all mistranslated. [00:34:40] Everything he says is mistranslated. [00:34:42] Every single thing. [00:34:43] He's actually speaking French. [00:34:45] Well, that's the problem. [00:34:46] You can't get an Italian... [00:34:48] Right, yeah. [00:34:50] Next up, everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. [00:34:57] Hmm. [00:34:58] Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. [00:35:03] I was gonna say Michael Jackson quoting from Man in the Mirror, but there's no repeats. === Bonus Question (02:23) === [00:35:08] Hmm. [00:35:12] Mike. [00:35:14] Alright, Ben, who'd you go with? [00:35:17] I said C.S. Lewis. [00:35:18] Again, wrong, but it's okay. [00:35:20] Yeah, I said Gandhi. [00:35:23] Also probably wrong. [00:35:25] We've got Tolstoy here. [00:35:26] Tolstoy, okay. [00:35:27] Yeah, that's definitely... [00:35:28] Did Tolstoy ever consider his own advice, or no? [00:35:33] Did he... [00:35:33] Yeah, seriously. [00:35:34] I don't know. [00:35:35] It's like another Hemingway-type quote. [00:35:38] Two more, just for... [00:35:40] The winner might be decided, but this is for pride. [00:35:42] So you could tie it up. [00:35:44] This is gonna be a bonus question. [00:35:46] We might give double points for this one because I'll be very impressed. [00:35:50] Hold on a second here. [00:35:52] We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. [00:35:55] Just to rig this thing. [00:35:56] The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. [00:36:00] We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. [00:36:03] The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. [00:36:10] Hmm. [00:36:11] I feel like this entire game was just the entire book of Bartlett's quotations. [00:36:20] The entire book. [00:36:21] All 800 pages was the length of this game. [00:36:28] Michael! [00:36:29] Okay, fine. [00:36:29] This time I'll do Chesterton. [00:36:31] I did Lewis, and my B suggestion was Tolkien. [00:36:37] The one time you didn't guess Play-Doh, it was Play-Doh. [00:36:39] Oh, it was Play-Doh. [00:36:40] I kind of thought it was Chesterton. [00:36:43] I guess that would kind of make sense with Play-Doh. [00:36:46] And we are down to our final question. [00:36:48] He did love light. [00:36:49] Yeah, he did love light. [00:36:51] Our final question, our final quote is this. [00:36:54] Poor kids are just as smart as white kids. [00:37:00] And only dead people, right? [00:37:03] Right. [00:37:03] I'll leave that up to the producers who chose this. [00:37:10] Michael Knowles. [00:37:11] One of the true wits and philosophers of our age. === Let Stand, Be Generous (03:55) === [00:37:16] President Brandon. [00:37:17] Come on, man! [00:37:19] Ben? [00:37:22] Joseph R. McBiden face. [00:37:25] Wow. [00:37:26] Well done, both of you. [00:37:27] Well done. [00:37:28] I'm not sure what qualifies as dead, but we now know that the Daily Wire host who can quote the most dead men accurately is Michael Knowles. [00:37:38] Michael, would you like to... [00:37:40] How would you like to accept this? [00:37:41] I tell you, I have not been nervous about these games before, but this is not just flattery. [00:37:49] This is no false modesty. [00:37:51] This is a man who knows a lot of dead people, but there were some crucial errors here and lapses in Ben's education, namely Michael Jackson and a handful of others as well. [00:38:03] So I accept this with humility and a great deal of joy. [00:38:10] Well, you know, all I can say is that, unlike Naturally It's Clean, this competition was not in fact clean. [00:38:20] And I hereby challenge the Vice President of the United States, Mike Pence, to overturn the results of this contest. [00:38:31] And I believe that there will be a very big rally, a very big rally, peacefully congregate near Michael Knowles' office. [00:38:38] I can hear... [00:38:40] And peacefully protest at Michael Knowles' office. [00:38:43] Pardons available later. [00:38:44] I hear the door, people are banging on the doors. [00:38:48] I hear facts don't care about your Michael. [00:38:50] This could be very scary. [00:38:54] I'm just stuck in between two men. [00:38:55] All I'm saying is I'm with you. [00:38:58] I'm with you. [00:38:59] You're great people. [00:39:00] You're all very good people. [00:39:01] Very special. [00:39:03] Go on home. [00:39:04] You're very great people. [00:39:05] You can go on home. [00:39:08] Unlike the vice president, I don't have the power to overturn this competition, unfortunately. [00:39:14] I've read the Constitution thoroughly. [00:39:15] It was not there. [00:39:16] I read the trivia bylaws. [00:39:18] Again, it was not there. [00:39:19] I'm sorry. [00:39:20] I must let this stand. [00:39:21] But before I let this stand, Ben, we're going to have you go ahead and just off the top, I want it to come from the heart, your 30-second pitch. [00:39:28] Michael, sit back and enjoy. [00:39:32] If you wish to hear a man far too educated for his meager lot in life speak to you of dead people and their quotes, then make sure to check out The Michael Knowles Show, a repository of other people's wisdom and also a host who says things sometimes. [00:39:50] On that show, you will hear alleged humor. [00:39:53] You will hear verbiage in the form of English sentences sometimes. [00:39:59] And you'll hear much snobbery. [00:40:03] There'll be a lot of talk about cigars. [00:40:06] There'll be a bizarre sort of smarminess that you can't seem to shake. [00:40:10] But if you enjoy all of those things, then the Michael Moles Show is for you. [00:40:16] Congratulations to the most humble of our hosts, the most generous of spirit, the least corrupt, A person I'm so glad to employ every single day. [00:40:31] Michael X Knowles. [00:40:34] Thank you, Ben. [00:40:36] I'm honored. [00:40:37] I am going to make that my new logline of the show, I think. [00:40:40] The Michael Knowles Show, a suppository of knowledge. [00:40:42] Thank you. [00:40:43] That's awesome. [00:40:46] We're going to leave it there before it gets any weirder. [00:40:48] I will say I'm impressed. [00:40:49] That was well over 30 seconds. [00:40:51] That's just Ben going above and beyond. [00:40:52] Very kind of him. [00:40:54] He's a generous and charitable man. [00:40:55] And you are a generous and charitable man, Michael, for letting me call myself a host on the show, which you host. [00:41:00] I very much appreciate both of you for joining the Trivia Challenge and everyone for watching. [00:41:06] I'm Cabo Phillips, joined by Mr. [00:41:08] Michael Knowles, Mr. [00:41:08] Ben Shapiro.