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Dec. 27, 2020 - The Michael Knowles Show
15:49
The Best of the Worst WOKE Commercials of The Year! Enjoy

Thank you to everyone who sent in these absolutely woke commercials to review. I look forward to more of these and laughing my way through 2021. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hey everybody, Michael Knowles here, host of the eponymous Michael Knowles Show.
2020 has been very confusing.
Got a lot of mixed messages this year.
And somehow, corporate America has made it even more confusing.
Because they've been airing these woke commercials that are just selling leftist politics.
You don't even know what product they are selling.
The actual physical product until the very end when maybe sometimes they tell you, sometimes they don't even do that.
A lot of you have sent in some great woke commercials for me to view and then try to guess what product they're selling.
I don't have a great record on that.
I think I'm like three for 14 or something, but nevertheless, we keep trying.
I don't think these companies are going to stop moving into 21, 2021 rather, especially if they continue along this political path where you get Joe Biden and you get all this, all these awful sorts of people.
So make sure to keep sending those commercials in.
Post in the comment section which commercial you think is the most woke commercial of the year.
Without further ado, here are my absolute favorites from 2020.
Number eight.
Hey, the guy's a boss.
The woman is bossy.
Poor women.
One of these feminism commercials.
He's persuasive.
She's pushy.
That's it.
Women have it so hard in this country.
That's why they live longer and make up most college students.
Because of how hard they have it.
She's selfish.
Neat and vain.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, we never give women credit for their physical beauty.
No, never.
Not in this country.
She's a show-off.
Yeah, wow.
Gosh, it's hard out there for a lady today.
I have no idea.
Don't let labels hold you back.
I have no idea what this is.
Be strong and shine.
Pantene Brophy!
Not even a hint.
Number seven.
Not everybody wakes up happy.
It's true.
Sometimes you feel sad, scared, crappy.
Yeah.
Oh, this is going to be a wrap.
I can sense it.
All I ask is that you let me feel my way.
Oh, the woman's called a spanking.
This is a panty net.
Can't wait to leave this closed-minded town.
Oh, rural America.
My boss is such a freaking creep.
She seems lovely.
She's like very generically liberal.
I don't know what it is.
It's not just like only feminist or something.
It's like a moving company.
I can't believe my student loan.
I'm never moving out of my parents' home.
Just got ghosted.
Should've known.
Pretty sure...
I'm gonna say it's something like a moving company, because it's all about moving and leaving.
You say I'm too young to raise my baby girl?
Take your opinions and suck it, world.
It's actually kind of nice that she raised the kid and didn't do abortion or something like that.
It's pretty good.
They think it's woke, but it's not.
It's actually pretty conservative.
Throwing his phone away.
I'm still gonna stick with like a moving something.
Long commercial.
Good grief.
No one is happy all the time and that's okay.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Is that a Burger King?
It is Burger King?
I guess a Happy Meal?
I guess there's a tie-in there?
Oh my gosh.
And then at the end, Burger King supports the work of mentalhealthamerica.net.
You know, I gotta tell you, there's something very distasteful about that.
I like the pun of it's a happy meal and no one's happy all the time, but to exploit people who are going through, like, clinical depression and who are feeling suicidal to sell a cheap hamburger?
Number six.
They said I was too pretty to fight.
Now she can't fight.
You're gonna mess up that beautiful face.
They said I was too fat.
Only skinny girls can dress well.
I don't speak that language.
Something about being loyal.
They said my nose was too prominent.
They said I was too masculine.
They thought the catcalling was a compliment.
He said you can fix those teeth quite easily.
Boyish and ugly.
When they were talking about female, they weren't talking about me.
This was not pretty.
They would holler from across the street.
Look sophisticated.
Embarrassing nose.
Too chubby.
Was too skinny.
Manly.
Crazy hair.
Never looked good.
Too wild.
Too cute.
Too beautiful.
Too fat.
He said.
They said.
She said.
I said, no way.
You aren't me.
I'm me.
I'm not going to be defined by anyone's expectations.
I don't dress my age.
I dress myself the way I am.
Because my face has nothing to do with my boxing.
I'm ranked number one in the country and number two in the world.
As a fashion blogger, my style is 100% on a public.
I don't want to change my team.
Nothing they've said has meant anything.
It's like, I'm not you, I'm me.
This is my hair.
My beauty.
my say I have no idea I don't know I don't know They've only said platitudes.
My beauty, my...
Like, what?
Oh, man.
There's this click hole advertising campaign.
It was one of these satirical things.
It was like, are you going to take the pledge?
Take the pledge.
I take the pledge for my community.
I take the pledge for me.
And then you get to the end and they're not pledging anything.
That was this commercial, but unironically.
I'm me.
I'm not you and I'm not him.
I'm not my hair.
I'm not my kneecaps.
I'm me.
And me is I. And I is the first person singular pronoun.
And we is the first person plural pronoun.
But I am not we, I am I. Buy my shampoo.
Number five.
There once was a man who fell in love with his own reflection.
All day, he stirred into a pool.
Starving others of his attention.
As the weeks moved, he was glued.
Some thought he'd eat himself like food.
Is this selling like Barack Obama's next book or something?
Seems like a pretty apt description.
Until self-worship turned him into a gift.
A gift not just for him to treasure, but a gift that brought the whole world pleasure.
And so I put this question to you all.
Does that not make self-obsession?
The most selfless act of all.
Do you love me?
What?
This is so creepy.
Make yourself a gift to the world.
Do you love me?
Equinox gym.
You know what's so amazing about that?
I thought there was going to be this really profound point about narcissism and our self-obsession as a culture, why that's bad.
I thought they'd cast right-wingers or something as self-obsessed, even though it would seem the left checks that box a little more these days.
But then it became an out-and-out defense of narcissism.
Number four.
This is not new.
This has happened before.
In every downturn and disaster in history, gender equality has been set back as women have stepped forward.
Oh, I thought this was not new as the masks, but now it's a feminist thing.
More of the frontline care.
More of the pay cuts.
More of the jobs lost.
More of the responsibilities at home.
Keeping them from going back to paid work.
These times are not unprecedented.
But they give us another chance for equality.
If we all choose to step forward as equals.
I have no idea.
Care equal.
Hire equal.
Pay equal.
Model equal.
Do equal.
Choose equal.
It's like a credit card.
I don't know.
It's like Hail Mary.
It's like a credit card.
I don't know.
For an equal future.
Ah, Procter& Gamble.
Wait.
Procter& Gamble, Gillette, I guess like all those companies.
You know, it was a total Hail Mary when I said credit card because it just had the font that you see in credit card commercials.
Number three.
Who said that?
The lady at the store.
That is not a compliment.
It's an ugly, nasty word and you are going to hear it.
Nothing I can do about that.
But you are not going to let that word hurt you.
It was like the N word, I guess.
You got your ID? Yeah, that's what happens all the time, right?
White people just always calling black guys the N-word.
All the time.
The only time you actually hear the N-word, by the way, is in rap music.
I'm a good driver.
Yeah, that's it.
Overt, horrible racist.
Getting a ticket?
This is about you not coming home.
Oh yeah, racist cops just slaughter innocent black people all over the country.
You know that.
Of course.
That's what always happens.
I mean, statistically, it doesn't.
It happens like a dozen times.
Unarmed.
And unarmed, by the way, doesn't mean not justified, but point for another time.
I'll never forget that.
Let's talk about the talk.
Racist cops.
Did Procter& Gamble again?
I should have guessed that.
Number two.
Hey.
Hey.
You okay?
I'm good.
It could be a car commercial.
*music* Are they lesbians?
I think they're lesbians, right?
Of course.
Could be like a home insurance commercial.
Look at you.
Hi, Mom.
Hi, baby.
Mom, this is Amy.
Hi.
Hi, Amy.
Hey, Dad.
Hey, I'm Amy.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
That white guy doesn't like the lesbian thing.
Those darn white guys.
Hi.
Good morning.
Good morning.
Good morning, you guys.
Hi.
Hi.
Nice to see you.
Dad's happy to see the straight kids.
He just doesn't like the lesbians.
Okay.
Okay.
You totally have one.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
You just wanted my help.
I know.
A white neighbor lady doesn't like it.
Thank you.
A white guy really hates the lesbian thing.
Happy birthday!
Hey, Dad.
Hey.
Good night.
It's kind of like, over the top, even if there was a straight couple.
Like, you're unmarried, you're like, lying around, kissing each other in your parents' house.
It's not, like, really acceptable.
Sharing a bed?
John.
Unmarried?
You can't...
No wonder the dad's upset.
What is he doing?
Dad.
It's like a movie.
I have no idea.
It's like there isn't a product.
Did I do it right?
Oh, no.
I love you.
I love you.
A loving world starts with a loving...
It's a home insurance.
Show you're a proud parent.
Number one.
She's off.
Good job.
Good job.
This will be, the usual one is like, the candy's poisoned, so check your candy, right?
Maybe it's that.
It's probably that.
Oh, it's not candy, that's a pumpkin.
There we go.
All right, first one changed, it's an extra piece of candy.
Uh-oh.
I know, I'm going to beat you.
I think I see where this is going.
It's like you can't do the different races of superheroes, is that right?
- Their costumes are gonna look awesome. - Oh my gosh, I can't wait! - I did the haunted house and I know. - Maybe it is a candy.
Wow!
Look at you two.
You look great!
Thank you.
Thank you for keeping our streets safe.
You're welcome.
Get him!
Go, go, go, go!
Now we get to eat the candy.
Okay, it probably is the candy thing again, right?
Like the people are poisoning the candy?
Oh, no.
Are you freaking kidding me? - They're gonna trans the kids.
They're gonna make us trans the freaking kids.
It's so creepy.
I have no further comment.
This is creepy, and whatever that is, society should do the opposite.
That's it for now.
The Daily Wire hopes you're having a terrific Christmas holiday.
We will be back January 4th with new episodes of The Michael Knowles Show.
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