Minion Death Cult - #713 We need nationwide laws that ban these unnecessary deliveries at all hours. (preview)
Aired: 2025-05-15
Duration: 08:30


=== Finland's Speeding Fine Controversy (08:05) ===

[00:00:00]  Alright, the next thing I want to talk...
[00:00:02]  Hey, did you hear this thing that happened in Finland, Tony?
[00:00:05]  Have you been following Finland?
[00:00:07]  No, you know I like to stay out of white people's business.
[00:00:10]  Okay, that's smart because this news might be shocking to you personally.
[00:00:20]  Let me just put it up on screen here.
[00:00:22]  In Finland, speeding fines are decided on the offender's income.
[00:00:28]  Leading to a multi-millionaire having a 120,000 euro ticket.
[00:00:33]  And now I learned this from one of my favorite news aggregators.
[00:00:38]  Dudes posting their W's on Twitter.
[00:00:43]  And dudes posting their W's says, this a W or a tad excessive?
[00:00:52]  I'm going to say, first of all, I think this is a strong W. We've seen a lot of Ws for dudes, and I think this is definitely like 7 or 8 on the W scale for me.
[00:01:07]  I think so.
[00:01:08]  I think it's just another way to demonstrate your clout.
[00:01:13]  Oh, you don't think I'm rich?
[00:01:14]  Look how expensive my speeding ticket was.
[00:01:16]  Check this shit out.
[00:01:18]  It's a W for everybody.
[00:01:19]  Yeah, no, I disagree, Tony.
[00:01:21]  I think this is a clear, another clear example of society.
[00:01:25]  I mean, this is Finland, but society at large punishing the successful speeders among us.
[00:01:32]  Yep.
[00:01:33]  You know, like, why should I be punished?
[00:01:36]  Why should I be punished just because I was born with a natural ability to go fast?
[00:01:41]  Yeah.
[00:01:42]  Also, I grind so I can speed without it really impacting me.
[00:01:46]  Right.
[00:01:46]  The faster you go, actually, like, the less friction there is in the grind.
[00:01:52]  It's actually easier to grind the faster you go.
[00:01:55]  Skaters know this.
[00:01:56]  Everyone knows that.
[00:01:57]  Yeah.
[00:01:58]  So, just, you know, I don't know.
[00:02:00]  Keep that in mind.
[00:02:01]  But, like, yeah, why should I suffer?
[00:02:03]  Why should I suffer just because I'm better at the road than everybody else?
[00:02:09]  Yeah.
[00:02:09]  You know?
[00:02:10]  Absolutely.
[00:02:10]  Not fair.
[00:02:11]  Like, it takes a lot of skill.
[00:02:13]  And disregard for human life to do 70 miles per hour in a school zone.
[00:02:18]  Yeah.
[00:02:19]  I spent a lot of money to be able to go 125 miles an hour in my supercar.
[00:02:24]  I earned this.
[00:02:25]  And just to get into the right headspace.
[00:02:28]  Long nights watching epic fight videos online.
[00:02:33]  Text message after text message about getting another 8-ball.
[00:02:39]  Convincing my girlfriend not to call the police once a week.
[00:02:43]  This stuff takes work.
[00:02:44]  It takes talent.
[00:02:46]  And if they're not careful, Finland is going to alienate every...
[00:02:50]  They're going to alienate and lose every person who has the natural ability to look up from their phone just in time to swerve to avoid hitting a parked car in the shoulder.
[00:02:59]  Yep, it's not right.
[00:03:00]  It's not right.
[00:03:03]  This was funny.
[00:03:04]  Some responses to this are very good.
[00:03:08]  It kind of occurred to me...
[00:03:12]  That automobile travel on the highway is a lot like capitalism.
[00:03:17]  Not to do, I don't know, like a cliche, it's because of capitalism type thing.
[00:03:22]  But like, what does it incentivize?
[00:03:26]  What does like automobile travel incentivize?
[00:03:30]  It incentivizes going as fast as possible at the expense of everybody else around you and either trying not to get caught or when you do get caught, you pay a little fine and you go about your day.
[00:03:43]  Yeah.
[00:03:43]  The highway is a zero-sum game.
[00:03:47]  I get in front of you, that's it.
[00:03:49]  You're behind me now.
[00:03:50]  Fuck off.
[00:03:50]  You're done.
[00:03:52]  I did that.
[00:03:54]  There's only one parking space.
[00:03:56]  Only one of us gets it.
[00:03:57]  If I have to drive on a sidewalk to get it, well, that just means I wanted it more.
[00:04:04]  Yeah.
[00:04:05]  I know that I'm going to end up at the stoplight next to the guy that I passed a mile back, but That's not the point.
[00:04:12]  I got to the stoplight first.
[00:04:13]  There's always a chance that that stoplight was going to change one second later and you would make it and they wouldn't.
[00:04:19]  I'm not willing.
[00:04:21]  I have a high risk aversion to at least being stopped at a red light.
[00:04:26]  Not towards most other things.
[00:04:28]  Being stopped at a red light is one of the worst fates that could befall anybody.
[00:04:32]  There's a lot I would do to avoid that happening to me.
[00:04:36]  Absolutely.
[00:04:38]  The average Kiwi Says, I hate it.
[00:04:43]  So says about this policy, I hate it.
[00:04:47]  It's discrimination of the successful.
[00:04:49]  You can't believe in equality and then support something like this, Tony.
[00:04:56]  I agree.
[00:04:57]  You can't believe in equality and support something like this.
[00:05:00]  The only possible thing to do is to take this guy's money from the beginning.
[00:05:05]  Yeah, absolutely.
[00:05:06]  All of it except for like, you know, whatever, 60 grand a year.
[00:05:09]  What's the average cost of living in Finland, you know?
[00:05:12]  Yeah, just create the equal playing field by, you know, by making sure they can't make too much money.
[00:05:18]  I think that's the only way to equality.
[00:05:19]  You're right.
[00:05:21]  Ashley responds, it's not discrimination.
[00:05:23]  It should proportionally be the same punishment across economic class, which means rich people should pay more.
[00:05:28]  And I'm like, fuck you.
[00:05:30]  You're introducing like percentages.
[00:05:32]  And weights and, like, fractions and shit?
[00:05:35]  Like, that's not in the Constitution.
[00:05:37]  No, no.
[00:05:38]  The numbers should be the same, okay?
[00:05:41]  There's not a word in the Constitution about millionaires.
[00:05:44]  No.
[00:05:46]  The average Kiwi responds, why?
[00:05:48]  It's the exact same finable offense.
[00:05:50]  Why should someone have to pay more just because they're more successful?
[00:05:55]  There's no correlation.
[00:05:57]  And I like when they have to actually, like this is, like what he's arguing for is a flat tax, essentially.
[00:06:03]  Like what he's arguing for is, well, everybody should pay the exact same number and that's what's fair.
[00:06:08]  And it's like, well, hmm, if this really poor person pays that number, they become bankrupt and starve to death.
[00:06:14]  Whereas a rich person pays this fine, they don't.
[00:06:18]  They probably...
[00:06:19]  They paid somebody $100,000, $200,000 a year who does all that stuff for them.
[00:06:25]  They don't even know they had the fine, probably.
[00:06:27]  Yeah, yeah.
[00:06:29]  I've seen a million videos where some guy in a Bugatti is like, just give me the ticket.
[00:06:34]  I don't care.
[00:06:34]  Just give me the ticket.
[00:06:35]  I gotta go.
[00:06:38]  Ashley responds again.
[00:06:39]  Do you think a 200 euro fine if you're poor is equal to a 200 euro fine if you're rich in terms of financial and punitive impact?
[00:06:48]  The average Kiwi responds, I literally don't think it matters one bit.
[00:06:52]  We're talking about finable offenses, not jailable crimes.
[00:06:57]  Okay.
[00:06:58]  I mean, depends.
[00:07:00]  I just don't care that it doesn't matter to a wealthy person.
[00:07:06]  That's the whole point of a fine is that it's supposed to matter to the person.
[00:07:10]  It's supposed to have an impact.
[00:07:11]  It's a disincentive.
[00:07:14]  And then they end this comment with, do you pay more for food than the person down the road who makes less than you?
[00:07:22]  That's a good question.
[00:07:24]  And I have an answer.
[00:07:25]  With new AI technology, supermarkets are developing the capability to charge people more if they have more money.
[00:07:32]  So don't worry.
[00:07:33]  Don't worry about it.
[00:07:34]  Don't worry about it.
[00:07:35]  It's coming.
[00:07:36]  It's coming.
[00:07:37]  It's probably not going to be based on if you have more money.
[00:07:40]  It's going to be based on how desperately you need the item in question.
[00:07:45]  Like during a fucking natural disaster, the supermarket can just automatically set rates for staples higher.

=== Life in Quarters (00:39) ===

[00:07:54]  To compare food and necessity to need to live to speeding and being reckless and putting people's lives in danger is really funny.
[00:08:03]  Some of us have a need for speed, Tony.
[00:08:05]  I don't know if you've heard it.
[00:08:07]  For some of us, we live our life one quarter mile at a time.
[00:08:12]  And it is like eating or breathing to us.
[00:08:14]  That octane, that nitrous, that rubber on the road, the asphalt, all of it.
[00:08:19]  That is my food.
[00:08:21]  A lot of postings in this comment section too.
[00:08:28]  Vinyl interior, that's my bread.