#713 We need nationwide laws that ban these unnecessary deliveries at all hours. (preview)
TODAY: A rural NY gun dealer fires on a lost DoorDash delivery driver, hitting him in the back and causing serious injury. The right wing unites around calls to hold these reckless gig employees responsible for their actions. Shouldn't they know better than to ask an American Homeowner for help? PLUS: Finland wages war on the successful by ticketing drivers with fines weighted to their income. We explore how driving extremely fast is like capitalism (good) and requires superior intellectual capabilities, such as rationalizing vehicular homicide. Get a bonus episode every week by signing up at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult for only $5/month
Hey, did you hear this thing that happened in Finland, Tony?
Have you been following Finland?
No, you know I like to stay out of white people's business.
Okay, that's smart because this news might be shocking to you personally.
Let me just put it up on screen here.
In Finland, speeding fines are decided on the offender's income.
Leading to a multi-millionaire having a 120,000 euro ticket.
And now I learned this from one of my favorite news aggregators.
Dudes posting their W's on Twitter.
And dudes posting their W's says, this a W or a tad excessive?
I'm going to say, first of all, I think this is a strong W. We've seen a lot of Ws for dudes, and I think this is definitely like 7 or 8 on the W scale for me.
I think so.
I think it's just another way to demonstrate your clout.
Oh, you don't think I'm rich?
Look how expensive my speeding ticket was.
Check this shit out.
It's a W for everybody.
Yeah, no, I disagree, Tony.
I think this is a clear, another clear example of society.
I mean, this is Finland, but society at large punishing the successful speeders among us.
Yep.
You know, like, why should I be punished?
Why should I be punished just because I was born with a natural ability to go fast?
Yeah.
Also, I grind so I can speed without it really impacting me.
Right.
The faster you go, actually, like, the less friction there is in the grind.
It's actually easier to grind the faster you go.
Skaters know this.
Everyone knows that.
Yeah.
So, just, you know, I don't know.
Keep that in mind.
But, like, yeah, why should I suffer?
Why should I suffer just because I'm better at the road than everybody else?
Yeah.
You know?
Absolutely.
Not fair.
Like, it takes a lot of skill.
And disregard for human life to do 70 miles per hour in a school zone.
Yeah.
I spent a lot of money to be able to go 125 miles an hour in my supercar.
I earned this.
And just to get into the right headspace.
Long nights watching epic fight videos online.
Text message after text message about getting another 8-ball.
Convincing my girlfriend not to call the police once a week.
This stuff takes work.
It takes talent.
And if they're not careful, Finland is going to alienate every...
They're going to alienate and lose every person who has the natural ability to look up from their phone just in time to swerve to avoid hitting a parked car in the shoulder.
Yep, it's not right.
It's not right.
This was funny.
Some responses to this are very good.
It kind of occurred to me...
That automobile travel on the highway is a lot like capitalism.
Not to do, I don't know, like a cliche, it's because of capitalism type thing.
But like, what does it incentivize?
What does like automobile travel incentivize?
It incentivizes going as fast as possible at the expense of everybody else around you and either trying not to get caught or when you do get caught, you pay a little fine and you go about your day.
Yeah.
The highway is a zero-sum game.
I get in front of you, that's it.
You're behind me now.
Fuck off.
You're done.
I did that.
There's only one parking space.
Only one of us gets it.
If I have to drive on a sidewalk to get it, well, that just means I wanted it more.
Yeah.
I know that I'm going to end up at the stoplight next to the guy that I passed a mile back, but That's not the point.
I got to the stoplight first.
There's always a chance that that stoplight was going to change one second later and you would make it and they wouldn't.
I'm not willing.
I have a high risk aversion to at least being stopped at a red light.
Not towards most other things.
Being stopped at a red light is one of the worst fates that could befall anybody.
There's a lot I would do to avoid that happening to me.
Absolutely.
The average Kiwi Says, I hate it.
So says about this policy, I hate it.
It's discrimination of the successful.
You can't believe in equality and then support something like this, Tony.
I agree.
You can't believe in equality and support something like this.
The only possible thing to do is to take this guy's money from the beginning.
Yeah, absolutely.
All of it except for like, you know, whatever, 60 grand a year.
What's the average cost of living in Finland, you know?
Yeah, just create the equal playing field by, you know, by making sure they can't make too much money.
I think that's the only way to equality.
You're right.
Ashley responds, it's not discrimination.
It should proportionally be the same punishment across economic class, which means rich people should pay more.
And I'm like, fuck you.
You're introducing like percentages.
And weights and, like, fractions and shit?
Like, that's not in the Constitution.
No, no.
The numbers should be the same, okay?
There's not a word in the Constitution about millionaires.
No.
The average Kiwi responds, why?
It's the exact same finable offense.
Why should someone have to pay more just because they're more successful?
There's no correlation.
And I like when they have to actually, like this is, like what he's arguing for is a flat tax, essentially.
Like what he's arguing for is, well, everybody should pay the exact same number and that's what's fair.
And it's like, well, hmm, if this really poor person pays that number, they become bankrupt and starve to death.
Whereas a rich person pays this fine, they don't.
They probably...
They paid somebody $100,000, $200,000 a year who does all that stuff for them.
They don't even know they had the fine, probably.
Yeah, yeah.
I've seen a million videos where some guy in a Bugatti is like, just give me the ticket.
I don't care.
Just give me the ticket.
I gotta go.
Ashley responds again.
Do you think a 200 euro fine if you're poor is equal to a 200 euro fine if you're rich in terms of financial and punitive impact?
The average Kiwi responds, I literally don't think it matters one bit.
We're talking about finable offenses, not jailable crimes.
Okay.
I mean, depends.
I just don't care that it doesn't matter to a wealthy person.
That's the whole point of a fine is that it's supposed to matter to the person.
It's supposed to have an impact.
It's a disincentive.
And then they end this comment with, do you pay more for food than the person down the road who makes less than you?
That's a good question.
And I have an answer.
With new AI technology, supermarkets are developing the capability to charge people more if they have more money.
So don't worry.
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it.
It's coming.
It's coming.
It's probably not going to be based on if you have more money.
It's going to be based on how desperately you need the item in question.
Like during a fucking natural disaster, the supermarket can just automatically set rates for staples higher.
To compare food and necessity to need to live to speeding and being reckless and putting people's lives in danger is really funny.
Some of us have a need for speed, Tony.
I don't know if you've heard it.
For some of us, we live our life one quarter mile at a time.
And it is like eating or breathing to us.
That octane, that nitrous, that rubber on the road, the asphalt, all of it.
