WE'RE BACK: Today we discuss Facebook's new(?) embiggoting policy and what it means for the Minion Death Cult LLC™ Also: Zuck's incredible new Masculine identity and the real dangers of feminine business culture (Lina Kahn's FTC suing you) PLUS: Tom MacDonald launders his Trump daddy fetish through once-beloved 90's sitcom mom Roseanne to declare "Daddy's Home," a collaborative rap filled with his usual zero-effort 10 and 20 year-old memes. FINALLY: 9 Year old's parents want a Trump tattoo on her neck, good samaritan Tattoo artist convinces her to get american flag instead. People get mad at him? But NOT for the reasons you're thinking. Join Teamsters Mobilize Sunday Jan 26th for a discussion of the recent Teamsters/Amazon strikes https://bit.ly/TM-13 Get a bonus episode every week by signing up at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult for only $5/month Music: George Duke - After the Love Maitro - BULMA Malady - Yeah
And conservative humor gone awry is going to fascist-fornia today.
So stay tuned.
We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
But stay tuned, guys.
We'll show you exactly what it looks like when you're in the desert.
All there in Barton, Houston.
Stay tuned.
All right, I'm Alexander Edward.
And I'm Tony Boswell.
And we are Minion Death Cult.
The world is ending.
Deep state backpack wrappers, conscious wrappers trying to cancel Roseanne for making them all look like the industry plants that they are is responsible and we're documenting it.
What's up, everybody?
Welcome to the show.
Welcome back.
We're back.
I think this is a normal episode.
Does it feel normal, Tony?
It feels pretty normal.
I like it.
It feels good.
They're saying it's the most normal episode ever, folks.
Nothing weird or off-putting or uncomfortable at all.
Yeah, and you know, it feels good to be back in the ears of the people, you know, of the real proletariat, not the patron elitist.
We missed you guys.
I'm sorry.
You know, goddamn capitalism wouldn't let us talk to you guys.
But, you know, we're back and we're here for you.
Yeah, it just really sucks that Patreon has to gatekeep the show from the rest of you.
Like, we've been fighting to get that, these all kinds of barriers torn down.
And we will tirelessly, we will continue working to champion the rights of all of our listeners.
But in the meantime, if you want to hear those episodes, you can go over to patreon.com slash minion death cult for only $5 a month.
You'll get access to hundreds of premium episodes for your listening pleasure, including the wonderful programming we had over the holiday slash continued peak season.
Break, man.
I mean, it wasn't really a break.
It was a break for the listener.
Maybe the listener's minds got some rest while we went down to one new episode a week.
For me, it was pretty bad.
It was a very annoying peak season that lasted way too long.
I had two normal days, Thursday and Friday.
And so we're taking that as a sign that we that next week will be OK and we can go back to our regular schedule of two episodes a week.
But, you know, they're just I don't know.
Be aware.
There may be further interruptions to the programming, but we are recording two episodes today, so you'll have your Patreon episode midweek, no matter what.
Anyway.
Remember, do your part.
Don't shop online because that makes Alex work.
Don't do that.
Right.
Absolutely.
If you're in the greater area he's in.
Anywhere else in the world.
I don't care.
I don't know if there's any other UPS drivers who are trying to have a good show too.
But hey, don't make Alex live your packages.
Yeah, please.
Let's boycott Amazon.
Boycott online shopping.
Let's get some layoffs.
Let's get some UPS layoffs going, folks.
We need a break.
Yeah, I don't know.
What a good way to come back to the show, come back to Minion Death Cult with the news that it is now okay to be racist and sexist on Facebook officially.
This is like when James L. Brooks was like, no, Homer's still going to strangle Bart.
Yes, it's still going to happen.
Yeah.
This is awesome.
I wonder if it's going to feel like, you know, weed was better when it was illegal, when it felt wrong.
Now that it's been endorsed, is my racism and massaging going to feel as good?
No, because yeah, with the Facebook...
With Meadow working with the Trump administration, you're going to be getting that fucking government racism.
You're going to be getting that high-quality, pure, lab-tested CIA racism, and it's just going to ruin you.
It's going to leave you more addicted than you ever thought possible, and you're going to start seeking treatment on your own for your...
For you're doing ableisms and you're doing misogyny's online because of how crazy the potency is going to be.
This sucks, man.
Just give me that good old-fashioned outdoor organic racism.
Ditch racism.
Bring back mids.
Bring back mid-racism.
I want my racism shipped to me from Mexico in a brick the size of a Mazda pickup truck.
Yeah, exactly.
I don't care if I've got to pick the stems and the seeds out of the racism.
It's still good.
It gives you a little headache, but it's fine.
And think about it.
They're going to take away seeds from you.
You're not going to be able to attempt to grow your own plant a thousand times and never make it work out.
Yeah, so this is...
A leaked memo said that Facebook is going to be allowing shitty people to say and do shitty things on the platform.
This is part of...
Zuckerberg's rebrand as an epic masculine MAGA tech CEO now.
This is something that, of course, Jeff Bezos has been doing, shooting his ass full of steroids for the last three or four years.
Something Elon Musk has been doing.
All these tech bros.
What?
I met bro like they were just men.
I didn't mean bro like they were fucking alphas.
What the heck?
Alpha is everywhere, you know?
And how are we going to compete against that?
These dudes are jacked and lean these days.
It's funny to watch the real press or whatever be like...
What a shocking rebrand for these Silicon Valley nerds.
They what?
Became fuckboys?
The second they got some money, they got haircuts?
That's crazy.
They got haircuts and started their own clothing lines?
I would have never expected a self-absorbed narcissistic trend chaser to have done that.
Yeah, no way.
This is totally caught off guard.
It's almost like they got a hold of the internet and figured out that you can just like...
Have no personal style, but just do things from the internet and maybe it might work out.
Who gave these guys the internet?
The thing is, like, it's fine to not have a real, like, to have your own opinion about fashion.
Like, honestly, who gives a shit?
But if you're doing it in an obvious, like, transparent, like, pathetic...
Effort to win people over to your cause or whatever, it's pretty embarrassing, and it's embarrassing to be fooled by this, I think.
But yeah, we're getting reporting from The Intercept here.
Leaked meta rules.
Users are free to post, quote, Mexican immigrants are trash or trans people are immoral.
And then underneath it says, under meta's relaxed hate speech rules, users can now post, quote, I'm a proud racist or, quote, black people are more violent than whites.
So, okay, this is what I mean when I say, what was the, I can't remember the analogy I used earlier.
Anyway, maybe I'll remember it as I go.
There was some sort of attempt at policing speech or moderating Facebook to some degree.
It basically just plugged slurs into an algorithm and said, you can't say these slurs.
And those slurs included things like the word white.
There was a lot of like...
Stuff that Facebook did, it de-boosted stuff that it called fake news, but mostly on the user end, it felt like.
There were big accounts that would share things that would get flagged as, quote, fake news, and it seemed only to punish our Facebook group specifically when it would get shared into there for us to make fun of or call attention to it or whatever.
And yet some of the biggest accounts on Facebook got their popularity by boosting all this stuff.
And I'm not really sure what specific parts of their policy changed.
I mean, I guess I believe this reporting from The Intercept that they have now made conscious effort to stop moderating hate speech as much or whatever.
But I don't like...
You've always seen...
Anti-Semitic memes.
You've always seen, like, anti-women pages that exist.
Pages.
Whole pages and groups, yeah.
So I'm just curious with this newfound taking the leash off the bigotry or whatever, are they finally going to allow our Facebook group's posts to be seen by more than 20 people?
Or are they going to allow the Facebook page that I built 20,000 followers off of organically?
Will they show it to more than 15 people now?
Maybe.
The things that made Facebook bad, I think, Have nothing to do with censorship or even like I would maybe hesitantly say even like the hate speech like the things that made Facebook bad was the fact that it was moderated by algorithms.
The fact that it was moderated by just like a dumb system that you couldn't ever appeal to like just I don't know a month ago I had I was like Engaging with a post about, like, Glassjaw announced they were going on tour.
And I, like, commented.
I was like, oh, skipping Seattle again, huh?
Thanks, guys.
You know?
And Daryl Palumbo replied to me, Tony.
Would you believe it?
I don't know.
Daryl Palumbo replied to me, hey, sweetie, I love you.
Please request me as a friend and check your DMs.
No way!
I told Facebook, I said, hey, there's a scammer trying to pretend, you know, I'm at the age now where I, you know, as an aging hardcore kid, I'm at the age where I can now be scammed by Facebook bots named Daryl Palumbo.
Whoever sings for the blood is probably scamming people out of Social Security, you know, right now.
And they were like, we checked with your report, but it doesn't go against our terms and services.
And I'm just like, okay.
And then like two weeks later, it was like, oh yeah, this guy was a scam.
We've removed this profile.
But it's like, there's so many instances where you would just report like insane hate speech, like genocidal, crazy hate speech.
And it just, no, it was like, no, that's somebody's opinion.
You know, that's, we understand that this speech was distasteful.
But it doesn't go against our guidelines.
So I'm not sure exactly what's changed.
I do believe they pulled back the moderating a while ago just because of budgetary constraints.
They didn't want to hire or employ the people who would actually moderate the website.
And so they left it up to just bots.
One, they could be like, we did this for you, actually, Trump.
We did this for you and all your delicious customer base.
Your delicious email list, that's who we did it for.
It's so funny because it's like, what are they changing?
If this was a thing that needed to be changed, if this was a thing that wasn't allowed, we wouldn't be a show.
We wouldn't exist.
So it is going to be curious what's going to happen here.
And like you said, they get to use this over-champing free speech, not like, oh, we're actually saving a bunch of money.
Right.
We're creating a much worse product because, I don't know, it just feels like they jumped the shark and went all in on allowing AI and generative images, generative Accounts to just post all the sloppy you've seen.
And they were like, I guess an additional revenue stream could be like the anti-woke crowd.
So let's just say we're also being anti-woke.
I think that's the extent of it.
Let me read here from The Intercept.
This is by Sam Biddle.
Meta is now granting its users new freedom to post a wide array of derogatory remarks about races, nationalities, ethnic groups, sexual orientations, and gender identities.
Training materials obtained by The Intercept reveal.
Examples of newly permissible speech on Facebook and Instagram highlighted in the training materials include, quote, immigrants are grubby, filthy pieces of shit.
Quote, gays are freaks.
Quote, and now this is like an actual slur, but quote, look at that tranny, parentheses, beneath photo of 17-year-old girl.
So yeah, you can like harass children now officially on Facebook and Meta.
That seems pretty, I guess, I wonder if, because don't they have like an Instagram for children?
That seems like it would be the place to go to to harass as many children as possible, if that's what you're into.
That's wild.
Yeah, I wonder how it's going to translate over there.
It's so wild.
Like, man, now they don't have to edit their words.
They don't have to put like F asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, T, you know?
Yeah.
The changes are a part of a broader policy shift that includes the suspension of the company's fact-checking program.
The goal, Meta said Tuesday, is to, quote, allow more speech by lifting restrictions.
Meta's newly appointed global policy chief, Joel Kaplan, described the effort in his statement as a means to fix, quote, complex systems to manage content on our platforms, which are increasingly complicated for us to enforce.
There was one pretty good quote in here.
Yeah.
When asked about the new policy changes, Meta spokesperson Corey Chambliss referred to The Intercept.
Two remarks from Kaplan's blog post announcing the shift.
Quote, we're getting rid of a number of restrictions on topics like immigration, gender identity, and gender that are the subject of frequent political discourse and debate.
It's not right that things can be said on TV or the floor of Congress, but not on our platforms.
Oh, they got a point.
They got a point there.
How are we going to keep a real world when we can't even do what I see on TV? They're saying this stuff in the Supreme Court.
They're saying these words.
In the halls of justice.
I mean, they are, like, Congress people are fucking pitching a fit about gender and freaking, I mean, look at, like, Nancy Mace.
Look at what Nancy Mace is doing in Congress right now.
Yes, like, people have nominated and elected freaks into office, and that's fairly unfortunate.
I do, this is, I guess this is how I feel about it, and, you know, like...
This is maybe just because of the point we're at right now.
This is how I feel about it.
I do feel about the fight over tech censorship and we need to have Facebook police what people can say or what they can't say or whatever does become a substitute argument for the larger argument about immigrants' rights or Trans people's rights or minority rights.
I do think spending time petitioning Facebook to be a nicer corporation or whatever is kind of a moot point at this point.
I don't know, man.
Tech companies make it clear they'll fucking...
Spin on a heel and change policy decision like that.
If the shareholders tell them to, if their political allies tell them to, if they just see the winds changing, I think, yeah, I mean, not that any of us have enough power to actually make Facebook change its policy again or whatever, but it's just like, there is a point where you're saying, saying, "Well, look at all the bad stuff people are doing and saying and passing in real life."
You know, shouldn't they, shouldn't Facebook reflect that reality?
And like, I mean, I don't, you know, I don't think it's good that Facebook is like that, but I don't think like it's the right fight to make, to try and make Facebook better, you know?
Maybe that's in self-interest because if Facebook was better, then we wouldn't have a job, like you said, Tony.
Like you said, it's just kind of funny because it's kind of like when Tyler Creator was talking about cyberbullying, he's like, just log off.
There is some truth to that.
It's like, yes, it's bad and it sucks and it can be hurtful, but the real stuff happening is much worse.
These corporations are...
Facebook itself is doing worse things than just allowing bad words on the platform.
Absolutely.
It's like influencing actual public policy and hoarding wealth and deciding where other people's resources go to and actively harming the environment.
All these things are real things.
If I had a website, I have a Facebook group.
Yeah, I kick people out if they're being too annoying or whatever.
If I were in charge of a website, I would absolutely moderate it so that there weren't any Nazis there.
But you're asking a profit-driven corporation to behave like a good person, and they're just not people.
They're like magical creatures conjured from hell.
You know, conjured into existence from hell to, like, devour resources from the rest of us.
Yeah, like, it's pretty 101 that, you know, morality and profits will always be out of heads.
Like, they will never, you know, you can't do both.
Yeah, this Zuckerberg transformation has really been something, though.
Do you see how he looks now, Tony?
Yeah, it's so funny because I'm just like, they're kind of making me a big deal about how he looks.
And it's like, yeah, I guess my guy got some baggy tees and grew his hair out.
Yeah, well, he looks like a retired skateboarder.
Yeah.
I don't know.
He looks like he'd be hanging out with Eric Costin or something like that.
I don't know.
Yeah, he's dressing like a cool 40-year-old or like a normal 18-year-old.
And he's like neither, you know?
Obviously.
It's pretty weird to have a fashion change this drastic as an adult adult.
You kind of miss the boat.
No one's going to judge you as a 40-year-old for continuing to wear button-up shirts or a medium-sized t-shirt or whatever.
There's kind of like a...
Timelessness about that.
You put a fucking target on your back the second you put on a brand new chain as a 40-year-old.
Yeah, absolutely.
And it's that thing where you really can't buy cool.
It's just impossible.
It has to be kind of natural.
And you really can't do that pivot when you've been in the public eye for so long being a square.
And then all of a sudden, it's like, did you have somebody around you for that long?
Because I know that people had to be like, hey, you could look...
Cooler.
You know you have money.
You can kind of do whatever you want.
You know you could look cooler.
And it's funny that I don't think he ever did look cool because he did have money, so he didn't have to.
But now looking cool is actually...
This is a business move.
That's the best part.
This is all to make him seem more appealing and relatable.
Yeah, it's a sales pitch.
Purely a business strategy.
Do you see this shirt?
I was looking at this photo from this Bloomberg article.
And I was like, is this like a trick of the light?
Like, is something being projected on his shirt?
I thought it was a watermark on the photo.
It's not a water...
Yeah, right.
That's what it looks like.
Oh, my God.
No, this is his shirt company, bro.
He's like...
He's doing the Kanye thing.
He is, like, reinventing himself as, like, a fashion-forward, tech-forward, like, think-trepreneur, you know?
Except Kanye was always into fashion.
It wasn't a random pivot.
This is so weird.
Who's going to buy this fucking shirt?
The same people that are buying any story this guy sells.
This is what I found out about this shirt.
At what might be Meta's most...
Impressive developer keynote ever.
Zuckerberg wore a structured black tee and jeans, a classic look for Silicon Valley founders who want to make us feel like they're one of us, except that they're powerful billionaires.
But upon closer inspection, his shirt makes a bold decoration.
Ott, Zuck, Ott, Nihil.
And if, yeah, you look at it, it's just cat.
It's cat.
It's like black on black shirt.
And it just says in like, you know, the pseudo Roman.
Zuck!
Zuck Nihil!
On his fucking shirt.
It's pretty stupid.
The letters stretch across the sleeves and chest in a way that's on trend, yet hard to read.
Especially if you're not familiar with the ancient Latin declarations of Roman emperors.
You see where this is going, guys?
The original phrase, out Caesar, out Nihil, translates to either Caesar or nothing.
It's an expression of the desire to become a supreme ruler at any cost.
So that's pretty cool.
So bizarre.
Also, this is actually not on trend.
The over-the-chest-onto-the-sleeves thing is not.
That's pretty extremely played.
It's not a good look anymore.
It's funny because I knew it just felt kind of racist for some reason.
It just did.
Yeah, it is because he's over here saying I'm in charge.
This is me.
It's me or nothing.
Saying me or nothing is so wild.
Yeah, man, this makes you look really cool.
This doesn't reinforce the idea that everybody already had about you, that you were a megalomaniac trying to shape the world and even the metaverse in your image.
Yeah, that's another thing that this kind of rebrand or whatever...
Revolves around was Zuckerberg's spectacular failure in launching the metaverse three years ago, which saw the company lose a lot of money when everybody saw the little Sims egg-shaped avatars that he debuted as the future of the internet.
Do you remember that, Tony?
I do remember that.
It's funny because I forgot that it actually did happen.
I forgot that it was launched and I think 15 people used it.
I totally forgot about that.
See, if you do that, if you make an avatar of yourself as an egg and your head already looks like an egg, I think you should get to get this haircut.
You should be allowed to change your haircut into the little curly fro thing that he had.
The little Jake Paul.
Uh, curl that he has going on right now.
Everybody should be allowed to change their hair.
I'm going to go ahead and say it, guys.
I'm going to be brave.
Everyone can grow their hair out.
You're allowed to.
No, not after the age of 35, unless you've had a catastrophic initial public offering.
That's okay.
Okay.
All right.
I'll give you that.
Once you're 35, you're stuck in whatever you're at.
Don't change.
Uh, this is part of his article.
Sorry, this is like part of his rebrand, his appearance on Joe Rogan.
This Bloomberg article, Zuckerberg says most companies need more, quote, masculine energy.
Mark Zuckerberg lamented the rise of culturally neutered companies that have sought to distance themselves from, quote, masculine energy, adding that it's good if a culture, quote, celebrates the aggression a bit more.
Wow.
This is very, very shallow stuff, but I can't help getting the sort of like, what's the phrase?
The woo-woo fascism of like, well, we need a more masculine energy here.
Well, you just mean like sexual harassment.
Yeah, exactly.
Who's over here saying like, we need more men in business.
We need more businesses that are run by men.
Well, it's the energy, Tony.
It's not like, you know, sorry, energy isn't determined by your genitals, alright?
You fucking essentialist, alright?
Men, neutered males can have feminine energy too, Tony.
It's called gender.
Yeah, no, I love the adoption of like, well, this is where the liberal minds are at.
They're talking about energies and vibes and social constructs or whatever.
So we're just going to say we need more blood and soil vibes.
Did you know that a nation is just a social construct?
Did you know that?
You need to commit.
It's only a social construct.
And that's why you need to commit yourself to keeping it pure.
Yeah, you're actually grooming the rest of your Americans when you say we shouldn't do blood and soil nationalism.
It's actually an expression of socialization to want to excommunicate anybody with a certain skin tone.
Quotes in here.
Masculine energy, I think, is good, and obviously society has plenty of that, but I think that corporate culture was really trying to get away from it, Zuckerberg said during a nearly three-hour-long conversation with podcaster Joe Rogan.
Quote, it's like you want feminine energy, you want masculine energy, Zuckerberg said during the episode.
I think that's...
I think that that's all good.
But I do think the corporate culture sort of had swung toward being this somewhat more neutered thing, he added, before discussing his passions for mixed martial arts and hunting invasive pigs in Hawaii.
This is like insane.
I mean...
I don't know how many different ways I can say this, but it's like so insane to me that the most popular podcast in the world has on one of the richest people in the world, and the richest person in the world is like, yo fam, I think we just need more masculine corporate energy.
I'm like, what the fuck are we doing here?
Please God, why do I give a shit about the fucking...
Cultural energy of a corporation.
This is all fake.
It's all fucking nonsense, man.
I can't abide by it.
It's even more nonsense than we didn't go to the moon.
At least the moon is a thing.
The moon is a thing I can see every night.
I don't know, man.
You're talking about space.
That's kind of cool.
You're talking about corporate branding synergy.
Fuck shit as if it's your revolution.
You're embarrassing.
You're an embarrassment.
It's funny because he was a twerp his whole life.
I think everyone kind of made fun of being a twerp.
Then he started doing jiu-jitsu.
Now he's like, I know what being a man is.
Listen, I choked a man out and now I know what being a man is.
We need more of that.
I think we need more of whatever that was.
We need it in the corporate structure because It's funny because what do corporations do?
The best thing they can do is choke out the competition.
So we need more of that.
We need the combat.
Yeah, I've had several large head injuries over the last two years.
And you know what?
I think we need a more alpha corporate culture.
More masculine corporate.
I mean, you're not wrong, Tony, because Joe Rogan himself says...
Mark Zuckerberg started doing jujitsu and nothing turns you into a libertarian like jujitsu.
I'm sorry, someone said it.
Yeah, jujitsu or youth football or...
Yeah.
There's going to be...
I predict that there's going to be somebody on Joe Rogan soon who's like championing concussions.
They're like, no, no.
Like, the concussions actually, it allows you to use parts of your brain you weren't using before.
Yeah.
Like, you could never, the thing is, you could never connect the two parts of your brain that say, like, you know, do kill your family.
You couldn't reach that part of your brain now, but now you can because you've smacked your head so many times.
You've accessed.
And think about what else you can, if you can access that, think about what else you can access.
Most people only use 20% of their brains.
I use every percent of my brain, meaning I execute any fleeting, what do you call it, intrusive thought that comes across my brain.
I'm pretty sure that I have a football game next week.
I'm going to go head-to-head with someone.
I'm pretty sure after that I will be able to fly.
I feel pretty confident I will have the ability to fly.
Yeah.
Concussions, they just like...
Just make your brain stronger.
It's like when you lift weights, you know you're tearing your muscles.
Exactly.
But that allows them to get thicker and sturdier.
And it's the same thing with your brain.
You gotta tear your brain sometimes.
Yeah, you gotta do some massive brain sets.
Just you and the wall.
You and the wall.
Yeah, another reason.
I wonder why freaking Mark Zuckerberg is so based now.
Who could possibly figure it out?
Oh, what's this?
The Consumer Finance Protection Bureau was looking into them.
Oh, what?
Lena Kahn was looking into Facebook?
Whoa, that's so crazy.
Wow, yeah.
That is a lot of feminine energy.
You got Elizabeth Warren.
With the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau.
You got Lena Kahn with the FCC. It's just too much feminine energy.
They come in there with their hair in curlers and rolling pins saying, stop defrauding customers!
And you're like, listen, I've been hunting pigs in Hawaii all day.
I don't need this shit.
Sorry, bro.
And honestly, what's a more feminine trait than pocket watching?
Yeah.
Yeah, they want to be the nation's mommy.
They want to be the nation's mommy and be like, you know, no, you can't go steal a pack of cigarettes from your uncle because your dad's hands are too big to fit into the pockets or whatever.
You know, no.
Just want to put pillows and pads on everything, whereas dads, they want to teach you a lesson.
You know?
Yeah.
When I teach you a lesson, you'll really remember.
I already have a mom, and I don't listen to that bitch either.
Yeah, this is, yeah, pointed out by...
By Sam Sachs, I believe.
I saw this.
Zuckerberg was like, we had organizations looking into us that weren't even involved in social media.
We had the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau looking after us.
I didn't even know what that is.
It's some financial institution that Elizabeth Warren said, yeah, dude, you for sure don't know what the CFPB is.
It's some financial institution that Elizabeth Warren set up.
We're not a bank.
What does Meta have to do with this?
They came up with some theory and were trying really hard to make it work.
The theory they were going with was the fact that Meta planned to create a Zuckbuck virtual coin for Facebook and Instagram users.
Trying to use payment tokens to have its own little financial ecosystem that avoided other sorts of regulations and other middlemen and things like that.
I wonder why the consumer financially...
They were probably fucking like...
Letting people play FarmVille on credit.
Yep.
Imagine the interest rates on your FarmVille tab.
You know, that's crazy.
I love the richest man in the world.
They're acting like my business is making money.
Where are they getting this from?
Where are they getting this from?
Definitely an improvement to Facebook.
Definitely more free speech.
More free speech on Facebook just in time for the new Tom McDonald Roseanne rap music video to drop, wherein Roseanne seems to say the F slur over and over, so beautiful timing on their part.
Because I think this will be welcome on Facebook.
It's a good time for it.
This is something that Tom McDonald was alluding to, a music video, a song he recorded with Roseanne, which is crazy because I thought Roseanne had been canceled.
I hadn't seen her anywhere except for all over the internet trying to get attention in every arena.
If possible, whining about being canceled, going on everybody's podcast.
I think she was like hanging out with fucking the Trump family at one point.
Just really a disgusting person now.
It's kind of unfortunate to see.
Dude, so seeing this image right now, I had a crazy week.
You got to describe the image because we haven't even...
I'm looking at a screenshot of a music video and it's Tom McDonald with his braids next to a white woman in sunglasses with blonde braids.
And the thing is, I've been pretty busy this weekend.
I haven't really been able to get to some DMs and stuff like that.
And I've seen several that are like, have you seen the new Tom McDonald video?
And I saw this picture.
And then other people are like, can you believe Roseanne and Tom McDonald did something together?
I had no idea.
They were talking about the same thing, and then I'm looking at Roseanne.
Right, because you were like, hey, is that Sway from Gone in 60 Seconds doing a music video with Tom McDonald?
Wow.
Boing!
What if Roseanne was in the front seat with Tom McDonald and one of the fucking Bugattis or whatever they're driving here, and she fucking mounted him?
She climbed over the stick shift.
She grabbed the stick shift like a cock.
Was like, what's hotter, fucking or boosting cars?
And they're like, fucking while boosting cars.
Hello?
Oh, man.
Roseanne looks fucking spectacular in this.
Definitely looks like a Russian gangster grandma or something like that.
Maybe a South African piece of trash.
She's got long blonde braids and giant sunglasses.
It's just pretty crazy that this is her now.
We don't...
I don't know.
I don't like to cover Tom McDonald really anymore because he's got enough attention.
This dude has millions of subscribers and has hit the charts more than once now.
He doesn't say anything new.
It's all the same shit.
So I kind of hesitate to even cover him because we've talked about him enough.
This, I guess, is worth it just because of the addition of Roseanne and the fact that I think she does say the F-slur in this, which is weird that it's still on YouTube and stuff like that, but we'll see it when we get to it.
I'll see what other people think here, but the name of the song is Daddy's Home, which is just, again, crazy to me that they're leaning into calling Trump Daddy.
Daddy.
And it's really, you know, it's like supposed to be an own, obviously, that he's the daddy of all of you.
You guys are the ones that need the daddy.
We're just standing over here and cheering on your daddy, living vicariously through him, because he gets to spank 13-year-old girls, like Tucker Carlson mentioned.
I don't think it shields you from criticism.
I don't think you can be like, ooh, Trump is daddy, but not mine.
Yeah.
Not mine, though.
Pause.
Not my daddy.
He's my enemy's daddy.
I call him pops.
I call him pops.
So I used to always say like...
You know, I've kind of come to terms with we're never going to defeat racism.
Racism is like an idea that we can't really kill.
We can't really defeat racism.
So you have to fight the things that enable racism to thrive, right?
And the example I would always use is the success of Post Malone is like an example that racism is never going to go away.
And then Justin Bieber had dreads for a real long time.
Now I have to add Roseanne in box braids.
Roseanne having box braids doing a rap video is...
Just one of the more prime examples.
Doing a rap video with somebody who is surely racist, as she is, is just the biggest solidifying that, yes, racism is not going anywhere in America because people don't really understand it at all.
Yeah, it's a weird form of racism, though, right?
Because it's not just like...
It's not racism.
Yeah, yeah, but it's not like just cultural appropriation.
Like, it's doing it in bad faith, you know?
It's like definitely doing it to make fun of it, but then you do it for too long.
Well, okay.
It's different here.
With Tom McDonald, like, Tom McDonald has always been this weird, like, I don't know, walking hypocrite guy who got his start.
criticizing rap, talking shit about rap, making his whole identity about how he, this white boy, says what other rappers won't say, or yada yada yada, while having all the accoutrement, all the aesthetic, outward facing stuff as SoundCloud rappers, as trap rappers, that generation of rap that he was supposedly so much better than and teaching a lesson to or whatever.
Still obviously biting off the popularity of those artists and still, like, I don't know, using that culture for his own purposes or whatever.
So that's one thing.
But with Roseanne, it's like a joke.
She's like doing a joke.
Yes.
So it is weird to see the two of them next to each other because Tom is not supposed to be a joke.
And Roseanne is supposed to be a joke.
And we're supposed to have these two ideas in our mind at the same time.
And for people who aren't thinking much about this, which is his whole fan base, the video just amounts to, wow, this was fun and funny!
Like, there's no, like, deeper thought about, well, this is, what are they even doing?
Who is who?
What kind of person are you?
What is going on?
But specifically with, like, the type of racism that, like, Roseanne is doing, this is like, it is soft.
It's like the soft racism of the rapping granny from, like, The Wedding Singer.
It's like the liberal racism.
Wouldn't it be funny if a white person...
If your punchline is that a white person is doing something that is deemed to be black, if that is the joke...
It's the lonely island.
That's what I see when I look at this.
It's Andy Samberg.
Even though they're trying to be awful and they're saying awful things, the overall effect is...
I'm on a boat, bitch!
You know, and I'm just like, okay, this is so confusing, man.
I guess it's cool you guys are having a good time.
And what's funny is I do think that there is some self-awareness to Tom McDonald because he is, like, so calculated in his ways.
And it is funny that he did have to sit there and somebody, maybe Roseanne, maybe it was him, is if they were like, you know, it'd be funny.
It'd be really funny as if I look like you.
And at no point thinking, like, oh, does that mean I look funny?
Yeah.
You know, I know that had to have crossed his mind, and that makes me happy.
Yeah, it is like when somebody gets a makeover, you know, a drastic makeover, and it's like, whoa, it's like, whoa, these two opposites are now...
And it's like, no, you guys are both white cringe lords.
I don't know what you're fucking talking about.
You guys are both reactionary, surface-level assholes.
This is not...
It's funny both times, you know?
Yeah.
Let's listen to a little bit of this.
He'll be there.
That's an act.
You can If you want our freedom, come and take it back Bet you can.
We won.
Okay, so obviously like garb trash.
Really.
Like, I don't know, not a very memorable beat or whatever, but even the lyrics are just like so fucking nothing, just off the dome.
Like, is this all just an ad lib?
It sounds like shit, man.
No, this was written out hard.
And I love that we get to hear someone say like, cap, you know, and use slang and use rap.
And we've probably seen like 50 to 75 people in this video.
I'm not even going to say not one black person.
There's not one non-white person.
These are all white people.
It's amazing.
So the lyrics here, we won, you mad, it's done, too bad, boohoo, so sad, now your daddy's home.
I mean, first of all, we got to say we won.
Who's we, Canadian?
A point that's been made a million times, but not only is...
The reactionary grift, so fucking painfully obvious.
I mean, he's a Canadian.
He's exploiting you guys.
He's exploiting Americans to make money.
And he's monetizing American culture to steal your hard-earned dollars that you made on your home, on your family farm.
I'm going to learn French and then move to Montreal and become one of those Quebecois nationalists.
Who hates English and does raps in French about how people shouldn't speak English.
Fuck yeah.
I bet that's already a thing.
It makes so much money.
Oh, it has to be.
We won, you mad, you cry, we laugh, we wave the flag, now your daddy's home.
And again, a song just all about...
How happy you are and how successful and positive your project has been.
I don't know.
It really seems like a protesting a little too hard thing.
It really still seems like you're miserable.
You guys did win the presidency and you wrote a song just again about the liberals.
I think it betrays...
Because it's all it is.
It's not like a larger political project.
It's just attempting to...
Stoke the culture war and get points on the other side or whatever.
But I love the line, we wave the flag.
It's just like the vaguest gesture at Americanism.
And that's all it takes.
The flag, we wave it.
God damn, I love that flag.
I'm a sucker for that flag.
But just like...
We like the flag.
It's like the lyrical equivalent of Trump giving the flag a hug.
Okay, a flag, you're supposed to wave it, right?
Okay, that's what we're doing.
We're waving the flag.
We won.
You suck.
I drive the truck.
I never tuck.
Now your daddy's home.
Daddy's home.
You know, these are just good things.
This is just like, this is what real America's all about.
We wave the flag.
Boohoo, so sad.
This motherfucker has 4.9 million subscribers.
Yeah.
Million.
I can take a bath in your tears, that's a fact.
You know, so this is, again, like a 10-year-old Ben Shapiro joke.
You got lipstick all on your beard.
You're a man.
That is Cap.
Cap.
Cap.
So, like, what's Cap?
What's lying?
You know?
And then he says, you hear Pat, Pat, Pat.
I don't know.
Gunshots?
I guess he's just shooting.
Yeah, that's what I thought.
I think it's supposed to be gunshots, but they didn't want to embrace that part.
Well, he's pointing a gun at the camera when he says that.
And then he says, or he's pointing his fist like a gun.
If you want our freedom, come and take it back.
Bet you can't.
We thought Iraq wanted our freedoms.
Actually, it was the Libs.
They tried to take our freedoms, but luckily we elected a billionaire who's going to stop that.
Thank God.
The attempt at transphobia is so funny.
If you are just talking about a guy that has lipstick in his beard, he probably got kissed by somebody.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
I don't know.
You see somebody with a beard.
There's a queer person with a beard.
There's a chance they are a cis woman.
It could really go any way, man.
You could have dug a lot deeper with your bigotry here, I think.
Here's Roseanne's verse.
we've all been waiting to hear.
He's just like making crybaby faces into the camera.
Like I don't...
I guess this is supposed to be tough, again, because he's like, He's only doing the crybaby faces because that's what you're doing.
Yeah.
Just like he's only calling Trump daddy because that's what you would call Trump.
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
Yeah, pretty bad.
Um You know, does she say the F slur there?
Facts, facts, facts.
And then, I don't know, it sounds like she just goes into saying fags, but I could be hearing things.
Yeah, I think I couldn't tell.
I couldn't tell.
Turning Becky into Dad was a crazy line.
Turning Becky into Dan.
Oh, into Dan?
Yes.
Like, it's so funny how you have to reference, like, yourself, you know?
And like the thing that you...
Remember when you were kicked off your own show?
Do you have to reference that still?
That's why she's...
That's like the only reason she's got any popularity still is because, you know, hey, I was cancelled.
Same thing with Gina Carano.
Hey, I was cancelled.
Remember how it got cancelled?
That's the only reason any of these people give a shit about her.
These lyrics, yeah, again, are just...
Pretty, pretty bare minimum.
They tried to cancel me and say that I'm a racist.
Got a mean hook.
They can't get me with that jab.
Get it?
Try and take away my rights.
Oh, I didn't get it, actually.
I lied.
I got it now.
Okay.
Jab, vaccine.
Vaccine, right.
Hook.
Wow.
Jab, hook.
Try to take away my rights and to go and say this.
Well, listen up, because this granny's going bad.
She's the rapping granny, Tony!
Isn't this fucking funny?
Yeah, she's a rapping granny, Tony.
Like, every single one of this guy's bars is either a meme or just something, you know, something like fucking a Republican senator said three years ago, you know?
And, like, I was trying to, like...
I think the only original idea this guy, Tom McDonald, has ever had was of putting the this white rapper destroys modern rap like top and bottom text over his own videos on Facebook.
I think that's like the one innovation that he had because ripping off black culture, rapping as an anti-rap rapper, that's all been done before.
Even criticizing rap music for lyrics about gangbanging or lyrics about drugs or whatever, like a positivity rapper.
That shit's been around already, too.
He just found a way to market it on Facebook because he didn't have any shame.
He lacked the appropriate amount of shame.
To promote your own videos by implanting text in the video talking about yourself in the third person about how cool and subversive you are and how many other people you're owning.
But that's what Republican...
Culture Warriors had also already been doing.
Steven Crowder was doing that with his videos.
Ben Shapiro owns Woke College Student.
Everything is just a cobbled together, taken from this, taken from that.
Again, that's another reason why I got tired of covering him.
It's just the same...
Again, the same...
Like, surface-level, propagandistic slogans that are on the floors of Congress, that are in cable news already.
You know, it's just, he put, like you said, braids on it and face tattoos on it.
I really love the Roseanne line saying, this granny's going bad.
Like, that's been your brand forever, is that you're, like, crass and abrasive.
It's true.
That's always been your brand.
That's kind of just to go to say, they're doing nothing new here, but they're pretending like it is.
Yeah, well, she means bad in the sense of vigilante violence.
Yeah, exactly.
Like attacking a protected minority.
Yeah, she's about to do domestic terrorism kind of bad.
Yeah, I don't know.
It's kind of...
I feel stupid to be like, Roseanne was...
Man, I loved Roseanne or whatever.
It was just a TV show.
But it was a very good TV show.
It was a very good TV show about a working class family that actually had, like Malcolm in the Middle, actual working class politics.
Now, it is just entertainment, so it's not politics itself.
But it had a good message underlying it.
And it seemed like it had its heart.
In the right place or whatever.
And to just watch her become this fucking reactionary monstrosity is pretty weird.
It's a bummer.
It's a bummer, but it's just fucking bizarre, man.
Is this really all you could do to survive?
Here's some comments.
How in the world am I living in a time where I get to see Tom McDonald get Roseanne on a track?
Absolutely insane time I get to live in.
This has 5.9 thousand likes.
It's funny because we're over here like, man, it's so cool that we have things like vaccines and health science and stuff like that.
What a time to live in.
And he's like, Roseanne with Tom McDonald?
Holy shit.
What a perfect time to be born.
Thank God.
No reason not to kill myself just dropped.
Never kill yourself and it's the screen grab of this video.
Never kill yourself because one day you'll be watching an anti-woke music video on YouTube.
Phenomenal.
Absolutely insane.
Wow.
Can you believe we got to see Chuck Norris?
In the movie Dodgeball at the end?
Totally random, out of nowhere.
What the frick?
What a time to be alive.
Tom McDonald featuring Roseanne was not on my 2025 bingo card.
Yeah, you're actually reading that one, right?
Wait, no, for real.
That was like right under this one.
I didn't scream because it's just the same sentiment.
But it is like, whoa, frick, how wacky, frickin' random.
Like, that's the level of people we're dealing with who listen to Tom McDonald.
Literally all they need is just put a frickin' random celebrity in there.
That is so funny.
You know, because it's just like, what the heck?
What?
This is nuts.
Brenda Smith 358 says, I used to be compared to Roseanne back in the day.
I'm 72 and have never understood any rap songs.
Now, with Tom, I'm one of his biggest fans, even though I don't have the money to purchase his great products.
I love the way Nova and Tom are real.
Oh, baby girl.
Oh, I just need to hug you so bad.
Like, it's so funny because we've always had the joke of like, you know, I don't usually like rap music, but you know, Tom McDonald does it for me.
This one, she's so lucky.
Like, this is why representation is important.
She didn't know that she could be a rapping granny until she saw it happen.
Yeah, that's all these people are.
All these Ben Shapiro, Tom McDonald, what's his name?
Terrence K. Williams.
Like, all these people are just surrogate grandchildren.
For geriatric internet users.
They get to be like stands, but from mature.
You're proud of them.
I love how real they are.
Yeah, totally.
That's definitely what I get when I look at them, too.
I imagine Tom McDonald leaving a meet and greet with a mountain of Werther's.
My grandson loves these.
I thought you'd like one.
I love how real they are.
Certainly more real than my actual grandkids who never visit.
Yeah.
They say they light rack music and I tried to send them this.
They were not into it.
We'll be right back.
We'll be right back.
The last thing I wanted to cover today was an article that you sent me, Tony, or a story that you sent me, at least, that we both thought was fake until I looked it up on the New York Post, and apparently this is real.
Tattoo artist sparks outrage for inking nine-year-old girl who asked for a portrait of Trump but got an American flag instead.
Yeah.
What a headline.
It still doesn't seem real.
What a headline.
It still doesn't seem real at all.
There's so much going on.
First of all, she didn't get what she asked for.
That's kind of my first, like, what the fuck?
Like, I'm mad.
You know, you ask for something at a tattoo parlor.
That's what you should get.
Absolutely.
Frankly, you said you saw this artist doing a TikTok about defending himself or whatever.
And that's where it came to you.
But yeah, I looked up this New York...
An Arizona tattoo artist is under fire for inking a nine-year-old girl with an American flag, but he insists he actually helped her out and doesn't support kids getting tats.
The co-owner of Black Onyx Empire Tattoo, who goes by Sosa, shared an Instagram post saying the girl rolled into his Yuma shop with her sister and parents last May and asked for a tattoo of President-elect Donald Trump on her neck.
In Arizona, kids are allowed to get inked so long as consenting parents are present.
I did not know this.
What the fuck?
I feel like that law is there so that a 17-year-old can get a tattoo.
Right, minors should be able to get tattoos, but only if the tattoo artist is within two years of their age.
Exactly.
It should be like a Romeo and Juliet law, but for tattooing.
It also has to be in a living room.
Yeah.
Those are the rules.
You know what I do to not support, because I don't support tattooing children either, so I just don't tattoo children.
That's what I do.
That's how I let people know that I don't support tattooing children.
But she's going to get it somewhere else, dude.
I want her to get it where it's safe.
Dude, I want her to get in the home.
Don't be reckless about it.
You know, just having fun.
Keep it.
Yeah, so Sosa said he tried to scare the girl and family away from the very permanent decision by charging them $500 for what would have otherwise been an $80 tat.
I will say the American flag tattoo on her arm, pretty tasteful.
Yeah, it's a good one.
It's not bad.
It actually kind of makes it look like she was just made in America, which is probably what she's going for, and that's pretty cool.
It looks like she has a forever postage stamp on her arm.
It's very simple American flag.
Imagine...
I mean, this is fucked up.
I'm looking at child abuse.
Looking at this tattoo is like looking at child abuse.
Which, sorry, not to detract, not to get off topic here, but we need to stop these liberals from grooming children.
Sorry, can we get back to the nine-year-old getting the American flag tattoo?
I didn't mean to derail things.
Imagine if this were an actual Donald Trump tattoo on her neck.
First of all, I don't think you'd be able to tattoo a kid's neck without knocking them out.
Like, grown men have to be fucking strapped down to get their necks tattooed a lot of the times.
Like, I don't know how you do that to a kid.
And even if you did have, like, a perfect session, getting a portrait of a human being on a nine-year-old's neck, like, what could that possibly end up looking like?
Yeah, like...
Okay, portraits are already hard.
Neck tattoos are already hard.
Nine-year-olds!
Tattooing a nine-year-old also seems like it's pretty hard.
Who is going to, like, grow by, like, 35% of their current status?
That's why you wait.
You tattoo the adults because you get a bigger canvas, dumbass.
But I do got to say, I don't want to, like, take away from this nine-year-old.
Pretty badass.
Pretty badass.
Like, I am impressed that this nine-year-old sat through that.
Yeah.
We're not blaming the nine-year-old whatsoever.
No.
The nine-year-old's awesome.
I don't know why a nine-year-old wants a tattoo.
Like, yeah, absolutely.
If the nine-year-old was able to get a tattoo, good for them.
You know, shame on the parents, but like, good for them.
Probably feel pretty cool.
I do love that the placement is exactly where you think a nine-year-old would get a tattoo if it's not on their neck.
It's just on the bicep right below the shoulder, right where you put your first temporary tattoo.
It's classic.
I mean, I would have maybe gone with the Harley-Davidson eagle spreading its wings, carrying a fish or something like that.
But the American flag, that's also classic.
It's so funny.
Yeah, he did charge them $500.
They were undeterred, however, and Sosa talked them out of the Trump neck tattoo for an American flag on her arm.
In early January, the girl came back to get the retouched on her flag and Sosa obliged.
Anyways, what do you guys think?
He wrote in the Instagram post.
Why would you do...
This is so fucking crazy.
I would not.
I don't even own a tattoo shop, and I would not tattoo a minor.
I certainly, like, wouldn't be.
If you even thought you were doing the right thing, I would still not publicize it.
Like, brag about it.
Like, look for, try to get flowers off of this shit.
You're a psycho, dude.
You're gonna have death threats for the next two months, you dumbass.
No, they're signing the NDA. It is a secret.
It's a deep, dark secret that this ever happened.
What do you guys think?
Just like anything.
Anything for fucking 15 minutes of fame.
Just destroy your life and your practice.
I mean, I guess it's not illegal, but most tattoo shops...
Will absolutely not, even in Arizona, will not tattoo a fucking minor because it is not a good look.
It does not look like a responsible...
It's like, you know, advertising that you're letting your child handle guns without supervision.
Like, it's just however cool you think it makes you in the culture war or whatever.
It's just generally frowned upon.
See, you're not thinking.
You don't understand the huge market of nine-year-old to want tattoos that he now has access to.
He is now the guy.
I actually have an appointment for a take Penny down the next week, get her a little tattoo.
That's great, dude.
Yeah, she wants to get Hello Kitty on her face.
Whoa.
Yeah, let's do it, babe.
I knew a guy who got Hello Kitty with crossbones underneath on his calves.
And he was an adult, so where's his excuse, you know?
I quote, I'm heavily tattooed and I believe anyone involved in this should be prosecuted and put in jail.
Um, where is where it talks more about the family, dude?
Uh, Sosa said he also felt obligated to do the tattoo when her parents accepted the higher price without blinking.
And that once he heard their story, he felt a bit better about it.
They were from Turkey and they came as refugees over here.
So they would really appreciate the opportunity that they got to be in the United States.
He said, explaining that she wanted the Trump tattoo as an expression of their gratitude to the country.
Boy, how did this story get even more like, confusing?
How did this story get even more fucking bizarre that it's a refugee family trying to tattoo their nine-year-old to thank Trump and the Republican Party and America for being so welcome and hospitable to immigrants?
That's so wild.
Imagine they're about to get deported and she's like, no, no, no, no.
Look, I'm an American now.
I have this tattoo.
That's so funny because America looks down on so many other countries for being behind on stuff or being chaotic places.
But the truth is, that's us.
We are that place.
Oh, you want to go do sex tourism?
Go to Thailand or whatever?
Oh, you want to get your child tattooed?
Come on over to America.
I mean, I guess, okay, so think about this.
The Republicans are coming into power.
You're a refugee.
You're an immigrant.
You're like, oh, fuck.
They're talking about rounding people up fucking door to door.
They're talking about deporting a million immigrants.
Even if we are here legally, there's a chance we could get caught up in the system and processed and separated.
What better way to identify our child than if she has a permanent tattoo on her arm?
Exactly.
Oh, family separation policy?
No.
We got that covered.
We got the one with the Trump.
The Trump on her neck.
Maybe they thought the fucking Gestapo would knock on the door and they'd see Trump's face on her neck and be like, okay, this is like smearing the blood of a lamb across your door front.
We'll move on.
Yeah.
They think it's some sort of assimilation cheat code.
They're like, no, we're real Americans.
We had Trump tattoos on our necks.
We learned about this from second-generation Mexicans.
Amazing.
This is how you become white.
No, it works.
I've seen it.
I've seen it.
Oh, boy.
What a cool world.
Man, chat pile was right.
Let me get to some of these.
Let me get to some of these fucking comments.
What do you think the response is going to be, Tony?
I thought people would object to it.
But there's a specific type of response that I was not predicting and I should have.
Did you look at these replies on the New York Post story?
Not really.
Is there a sentiment of like, God, I wish my kid wasn't a pussy?
No.
There was a weird through line that I should not have been surprised about.
And we'll get to that in just a second.
But this first take I really like was from John Bonham.
I believe probably a different John Bonham than the revolutionary drummer from Led Zeppelin.
No, you can't do that.
You can't use someone else's name.
It's really him?
Oh, shit, bro.
I thought he died.
Yeah, you can't do that on the internet.
Wow.
He had his consciousness uploaded.
When the levy breaks was actually a warning about the liberals' global warming plots.
Yeah.
John Bonham says...
So he charged them $500 for an $80 tattoo.
He should be charged with theft.
Either refuse to do the tattoo as it was requested.
You got no right, quote, teaching a lesson.
I would not be in favor of a nine-year-old getting a tattoo either, but don't take their money and not give them what they are buying.
I love this.
I love that.
Oh, you thought you were an American by getting an American flag tattoo?
I'm an actual American, which is that I turn into the customer police about what kind of service I got from this small business.
You think you're American for getting the flag tattoo or whatever.
I'm an American because I need a refund for my American flag tattoo because I was actually tricked.
Everybody fucking loves their free market until you get charged $500 to get your nine-year-old tattooed.
I just love it.
Tattooing a kid, that's bad, but can we all agree lying to a customer?
Not cool.
That's worse, right?
Oh, man.
That's totally the point.
That's totally the point.
It's so funny.
That's how consumed we are by money and by things like that.
You see this story and you're like, it's too much.
You got charged too much.
I mean, they should have...
They should have known what they were getting into.
They should have maybe suspected that they wouldn't be getting exactly what they ordered when they look up in their tattoo artist as a freaking man.
You know what I'm saying?
Oh, he didn't read the instructions clearly?
Wow, I'm shocked.
He didn't get you the thing he wanted, but he acted like you should still be happy with it?
Yeah, sounds like a man.
Sounds like my male Instacart shopper.
That's why it's so important to check the profile pic of your tattooer before they tattoo your nine-year-old.
Fucking freaking out because your tattoo artist accidentally makes eye contact with you?
Hey, I know.
I pay you for a service.
Don't look at me.
Stay on the other side of the shroud.
I loved that response.
Just like the fucking like...
Consumer to the core.
Customer to the core.
It's beautiful.
But this is the theme that I was talking about.
Snow Ma says, people complaining about kids getting tattoos, but not complaining about puberty blockers or removing reproductive parts.
Got it.
And this has 374 upvotes.
And this was the overwhelming response.
Clucker 155 says, while I don't agree with him tattooing her, let's not forget that Democrats think it is okay for children as young as the age of six to start puberty blockers and transition if the child wants to.
Last Honest Black Man says, this is crazy, a nine-year-old.
But how many are against a nine-year-old getting a tattoo are okay with trans surgeries for minors?
Joe Biden said we have a moral obligation to provide trans surgeries for minors.
So this is, like, I don't know, this is their way of dealing with a fucking rabidly pro-Trump family having their daughter, attempting to have their daughter tattooed with his face.
Like, just the ultimate, you know, and I realize these are, like, Turkish Americans, but it's just, like, the ultimate, like, parenthood as, like, And ownership class as like, you know, they're my property.
The child is my property.
Nobody else should get to say what society shouldn't get to say or even suggest what I get to do with my child.
And right now in the conservative movement, our whole personality is wrapped up in Trump.
So that's kind of what I'm focusing on.
And like, I am going to make my daughter get this fucking like disfiguring.
Fucking crazy, like, body modification thing.
Right?
Like, horrific from, like, top to bottom.
Horrific, practically speaking, for horrific reasons in general.
And in order to, like, grapple with that, they have to do, well, the what about?
What about?
What about?
And it's, what about all the six-year-olds that get trans surgery?
What about all the six-year-olds that get puberty blockers?
A thing that's totally happening.
A nine-year-old getting a tattoo is more common than what you're talking about.
Neither of them are common things that happen, but we're in a story about one of them actually happening.
A fucking six-year-old doesn't have stuff to remove.
What are you fucking talking about, man?
Puberty blockers.
Are for blocking puberty.
They're not for six-year-olds.
Also, they're reversible.
Yeah.
And if there was some situation where for some reason a six-year-old was on some sort of puberty blockers, there was some sort of really wild, unique hormonal thing going on that needed to be addressed.
And I assure you that if you were one of these people...
No matter what your political stance, you're probably going to do that because it was probably for their health.
They probably needed that for some sort of survival thing.
It's just...
You don't got to make shit up.
It's just such a...
You know, visceral, like, vulgar meme.
You know, child sex surgeries.
Like, these people are fucking obsessed with them.
And, like, you know, I'm not going to be uncharitable and say that all of them are pedophiles, that all of them are, like, sex freaks for focusing on this, because I get how, like, you know...
Just gutter, like, how strong of a fucking story this is.
They're mutilating your children.
Like, that's, well, that sounds worrying, you know?
I fucking get it.
But to just bring this shit up, like, out of nowhere, constantly, like, this is an unhealthy obsession.
This is absolutely a weirdly unhealthy fixation on children's genitalia, man.
The idea that a six-year-old is transitioning, quote, transitioning in any way other than a different haircut or a different wardrobe that hopefully they picked out themselves anyway is absurd.
Because, I don't know, most of these people, if you're not an overwhelmingly freakish culture war person, you're not going to be like, my son can't wear pink.
If you're a normal person, you're going to be like, yeah, wear whatever color you want or play with whatever toys you want.
Maybe I'll also be a normal parent and try to imprint my stuff that I like onto you.
But if your kid doesn't like soldiers or whatever, are you really going to fucking throw a fit and storm the Capitol?
Most people aren't like this.
There's just such a loud contingent of freaks.
Who find this story, because when you first told me about this, these comments were not present in the New York Post comments.
It was mostly people just being like, well, this is bad.
Tattoo artists should not tattoo a child.
Then I'm assuming it found its right-wing audience in people being like, well, the libs are upset about a child having autonomy over their body.
Hmm.
Hmm.
I think you're a hypocrite, actually.
And it's like, what?
Gotcha.
Gotcha.
I love how this is going to result in these people Googling the phrase trans child.
To try to find evidence of this happening for real.
They're going to be looking up those things.
They're freaks.
They're fucking freaks.
They're obsessed.
It's already on their timeline.
Trans kids are all over their fucking timeline.
It's what they focus on.
It's what they fixate on.
That's where all this information is coming from.
It's coming from memes.
It's coming from memes and TikTok videos and YouTube stuff.
It's coming from libs of TikTok.
That's where...
They're getting their information from Matt Walsh, who estimated that there's been 100,000 minor gender-affirming surgeries on minors.
It's in the low thousands over the course of 20 years.
And again, this is for special situations where there's like...
An older teen who's really going through some shit and the last measure is like, okay, we'll do a gender-affirming top surgery.
And again, the level of regret or of what is it called?
Detransitioning.
Extremely low.
Extremely low.
The satisfaction that people have with their gender-affirming surgeries is higher than what people have with their knee surgeries.
People generally, in terms of surgery, do not regret having gender-affirming surgery.
This should all be decided on an individual basis between a doctor and a parent or a caregiver.
And, of course, this should all be decided by people.
Who have vested interests in these specific outcomes and not just weirdo fetishists who need a new scapegoat, who need a new explanation for why things aren't great and just paint with this crazy broad brush pretending that it's in service of children's health.
In reality, It's their concern for their own mental health because it's something they can't grapple with.
It's something that they refuse to wrap their heads around or they get such a kick out of fighting it that it wouldn't be in their interest to wrap their heads around it.
Yeah, and like you said, it is so rare.
It's so rare.
I have an elementary school age child and if I were to ask her, hey, how many of your friends Play Roblox.
There'd be a large list.
I was like, hey, if you or any of your friends, do you guys have any...
Sexuality, gender and sexuality going on.
She's like, well, I got a couple friends who are bi and there's one kid who's non-binary.
They're pretty cool.
That's it.
That was it.
This entire school, there's one kid.
Everyone's fine.
Everyone's cool.
They're all like, yeah, they're non-binary.
They're pretty cool, though.
Who cares?
It's not an epidemic.
There are way more kids who get in trouble bringing knives to school.
Right.
That's a break all the time kind of thing.
That's happening all the time.
But what they think is happening is not happening.
And also that kid, they just dress a little different every other day and go by they-them pronouns.
And that's it.
They're not getting any type of surgeries.
They didn't get the they-them surgery?
They didn't get the they-them surgery, no.
So like a third breast.
Yeah, I don't know.
When you refuse to address the real problems in society, you have to find fake problems to blame it on.
You have to find something else to focus on so it becomes trans people.
This is the last reply here from the New York Post comment section.
It says, she's too young to realize that the impact this could have on her life could be devastating.
Although it's an American flag people are so judgmental and I also believe all the females who continue to get covered in tats Comma, arms, comma, legs, comma, because it's a fad, this is a fad that is already changing, and you can't go and have them removed.
You can try if you have the money for laser treatment, but it still leaves horrendous scars, which never go away either, Dot.
Unfortunately, I speak from experience.
So if you're wondering, like, hmm, what fads is she talking about?
This account is called Gypsy Woman.
So I'm just like, I'm imagining the god-awful tattoos she got when she was 25 and then had to remove.
Totally, absolutely.
And also, it's like, thinking that tattoos are still a fad.
That's kind of wild.
They're so everywhere.
They're everywhere.
Every walk of life, every type of person now has tattoos.
Also, man, the technology has gotten a lot better.
You can get your tattoo removed and not worry about it.
I don't know, but she did get it touched up, so that might be packed in there pretty hard.
I just love...
Listen, okay, I get it.
It's an American flag, and that means that most people will like it.
But people can still be pretty judgmental.
And you never know.
Some things that you think are forever are really just a fad.
When I got mandala art tattooed on my hands and feet and stomach and neck, I thought that was going to be forever.
Yeah.
I thought that was going to be cool forever.
And I was like, no one's looking at this kid being like, look at that piece of shit.
Everyone's like, oh, badass kid.
Parents, though, what's going on with the parents?
That's the first that everyone's going to have.
Yeah, so just, you know, I'm going to say this to Roseanne.
You think the white dreads, the box braids or whatever, the fake gold fronts, the Roseanne belt buckle, you think that's cool now.
Gonna realize one day it's just a fad.
It's not gonna look so cool when you're a grandma showing your kids, hey, showing your grandkids.
This is what granny used to do in 2025. And, you know, the internet's forever.
You know, you can delete that video from YouTube, but I got that shit downloaded.
The good thing is Tom McDonald does release an epic...
Music video every month.
I don't know how long this is going to have in the cultural imagination.
I think it's probably already gone.
I really hope, just for our sake, strictly, this is just for me and you.
I really hope for me and you and our mental health that she does not put out an album.
Yeah, I don't know.
She could probably have somebody ghostwrite it for her, I suppose, and just perform it.
I don't know if I see that happening.
It's just going to be all rap?
Do you think maybe she'll do some experimental Bjork type stuff?
I don't know.
Well, it'll be all rap until she gains mainstream acceptance and then she'll start doing country music.
Right.
Yeah, it's funny.
If you go through Tom McDonald's web store, you can just see every era that he's grifted.
You can go back to his pop punk.
There's merch for his and his girlfriend's emo pop-punk type band where they were doing the SoundCloud emo rapper pop-punk stuff.
Right at the same time as Machine Gun Kelly was doing it.
You can see the country stuff when he did a country song from a month ago.
He's doing country stuff again.
He's doing it right now.
It's just great.
He's like...
Looping back to aping white culture because black culture is aping white culture.
Yeah, it's cyclical, you know?
That's how it works.
It's really good shit.
Anyway, thanks for being patient with us during our irregular programming for the peak season.
Hopefully we're back to our normal schedule.
I did want to shout out Teamsters Mobilize.
They reached out to me about promoting their open meeting on January 26, 2025 to discuss the recent Amazon strikes.
We discuss reports and reflections from the recent Amazon strike.
This is open to all, so you don't have to be a Teamster, you don't have to be a UPS employee, you don't have to be an Amazon employee, but you can get some information about how the strikes went, what can be learned from them.
Organizing Amazon is, I don't know, one of the largest tasks the Teamsters has.
Before it right now, so it's a very exciting thing to discuss and a very exciting time.
Teamsters Mobilize does do a lot of organizing with part-time UPS workers and part-time Teamsters, which I personally appreciate with part-time workers being such a large part of the UPS employee pool and so many Teamsters are part-time UPS workers and are union, in my opinion.
Doesn't do a good enough job organizing and reaching out to those part-time members.
So I appreciate Teamsters Mobilize for what they're doing, for taking it into their own hands.
That's the right way to do it.
Awesome.
The link to that meeting will be in this episode's description, as will a link to our Patreon, where you can support the show for only $5 a month and get access to all of our previous bonus episodes, as well as one bonus episode a week.
